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sophie1973 · 17 days

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Bloodstream - Chapter 3

Here it is, chapter 3 of Bloodstream.

You can read on AO3, or under the cut.

Thank you so much Lauren @ash-morrison for the beautiful moodboard.

London, Drury Lane, September 1885

Alex Claremont-Diaz is nervous.

Never mind that he is a grown man of 28 years old (forever, although not by choice) and a big, scary vampire (He’s not. Nora says he’s a big Teddy Bear trapped in a vampire’s body. She’s not wrong.)

Tonight, he’s meeting Arthur Fox.

Or so he hopes.

He, June, and Nora saw him onstage when they spent a few months in London 15 years ago. After a decade in Boston—where June landed a position at a prestigious journal, and Alex settled for a mundane job at a small law firm—their eternal youth, conspicuous, drew too much attention. So, once more, they packed their bags and left.

Back to England.

This time, though, Alex doesn't quite feel the usual pang of regret at leaving it all behind.

Again.

It’s not that he enjoyed third-wheeling his sister and her partner, but she had been adamant he would come with them to England and not stay behind on his own in America.

He had not protested, understanding his sister's insistence and the importance of this new chapter in their lives.

Upon settling in London, one of his initial endeavors was procuring tickets for Drury Lane, specifically for the upcoming performance starring Arthur Fox in King Lear. Alex had also caught wind of a post-show tradition: Arthur occasionally emerged from the backdoor to distribute signed photographs to his admirers.

June and Nora had come to see the performance but had declined the backdoor. Arthur Fox was married to a slayer in one of the most prominent lines, so they were not keen on getting too close.

Not that Arthur Fox would be able to guess what they were, but whatever, Alex was still taking that opportunity. Obviously, it would be nicer to share his excitement with someone, but it is what it is. Vampirism was only a good basis for long-lasting friendships if you were lucky to meet and bond with another vampire sharing the same interests as you. Still, unfortunately, those were mostly keeping to themselves and not exactly shouting their condition over the rooftops.

He had made his peace with that. Mostly.

So here he is now, at the backdoor, his heart pounding with eagerness and nervousness, eagerly waiting amongst a few other people for Arthur to appear, exchange a few words with him, and even - if Alex is lucky - shake his hand. He is surprised that there is not a bigger crowd, but it is all the better for him to get a few extra minutes with the great actor.

Discreetly, he wipes his damp palms on his pants.

The door opens, and Arthur appears, all golden hair and a roguish grin. Alex has never been sold on the eternal life schtick, but if it allowed him to live an extra 40 years to enjoy this moment, it was probably worth it.

Arthur steps forward, his presence commanding and his smile captivating. Alex, his heart racing, tries to maintain composure, suppressing the urge to giggle like a virgin debutante as Arthur asks for his name.

“Alex Claremont-Diaz. It is very nice to meet you,” he introduces himself, proud of his steady voice even though he is screaming inside.

“Lovely to meet you too, Alex. Did you enjoy the play?”

This is the moment Alex has been yearning for, a chance to delve into his profound admiration for the play, to share his thoughts, impressions, and interpretations of the scenes and the source material.

Arthur doesn’t interrupt him, even listen rapturously, until Alex catches the bored face of his assistant behind him and stops talking.

“I’m sorry,” he says with a sheepish laugh. “I have this habit of going on a tangent when talking about things I’m passionate about. Feel free to shut me up and send me on my way anytime.”

Arthur's smile widens, his eyes reflecting genuine interest. “No need for apologies, Alex. I would never dream of silencing such a unique perspective. Your insights on the play are truly fascinating.”

And Alex falls a little bit in love.

Arthur turns to the assistant to get a photograph, but the young man shows his empty hands. “I’m sorry, we ran out.”

Alex feels slightly disappointed but knows he's already taken too much time. Nevertheless, he still gets to have an entire conversation with Arthur Fox, which makes him feel incredibly fortunate.

“Oh, that will not do at all,” Arthur protests. “I know I have some left in my dressing room. Why don’t you come with me? You mentioned you saw Much Ado About Nothing a few years ago. What do you think of the conversation between Claudio and Don John at the masked ball in Act 2?”

To his utter astonishment, Alex finds himself following Arthur Fox through the corridors of Drury Lane, chatting about one of his absolute favorite plays.

He can't believe this is his fucking life.

Upon entering the dressing room, they find themselves engrossed in a lively discussion about the characters and happy endings in Shakespeare's plays.

Arthur swiftly grabs a photograph, scribbles his signature, and passes it to Alex.

"Thank you so much," Alex gushes with gratitude.

"Your insights are truly appreciated. It's heartening to know that even within the vampire community, dear old William finds admirers," Arthur remarks with an innocent grin as if he hasn't just dropped a bombshell at Alex's feet.

Fuck. Blindly following Arthur Fox, especially given his marital connections, might not have been the wisest decision after all.

"How?" Alex inquires, unable to conceal his concern. Not that he believes Arthur will suddenly drive a stake through his chest. Sure, being staked by his favorite actor would carry a certain poetic irony, but he hasn't anticipated his sorry existence ending tonight.

Arthur smiles and nods to Alex’s right hand. "Your daylight ring. I'm a Wizard, Alex. I've supplied a few of your kind with those."

Alex hesitates, processing the information before a quirky thought bubbles to the surface: "How does that sit with your mother-in-law?"

With a crinkle of his nose followed by a chuckle, Alex responds, "Let's just say she's not exactly a Shakespeare enthusiast nor an enthusiast of mine. But we have an understanding, and I try not to let her poison my kid’s brains.." He gestures proudly to the family photos adorning the wall. "Meet Philip, Beatrice, and the youngest, Henry," he says, a loving look in his eyes as Alex lingers a bit on the last photograph of a beautiful young man, all blond eyes and clear eyes, a soft smile on his plump lips. A small mole is on the upper right of his mouth, and Alex is strangely fascinated by it.

“I should head home to them now. Do you need someone to escort you back?"

"No need," Alex assures him. "Thanks again. It's been a pleasure."

Arthur smiles genuinely, extending a handshake. "The pleasure's mine, Alex. Perhaps our paths will cross again."

"If you ever find yourself performing in America, I'll be in the front row. Take care, Mr. Fox."

Exiting the dressing room, Alex's mind buzzes with excitement, eager to share the encounter with June and Nora.

******

London, Mountchristen-Windsor residence, Mars 1888

Philip has a bad feeling about this meeting.

It’s not unusual for their grandmother to call them into her office to discuss slaying business, but something feels different this time. He can’t quite put his finger on it, but he generally trusts his instincts.

After all, they’ve kept him alive in the field all these years.

It’s why he never revealed to his grandmother that the woman he recently married is a witch.

It’s not that he thinks she could hurt Martha or worse. Her magical practices have dwindled to innocuous potions and healing arts, but he’s not blind or stupid, and he notices how Gran sometimes looks at his father.

It’s not a pleasant look.

It's much like the one she’s wearing now, her face stern and closed off, her gaze piercing and frigid. She’s not a warm woman by any stretch, but something about her demeanor sets off all kinds of alarms in Philip’s head.

Judging by how Henry and Beatrice sit rigidly together on the settee, he’s not alone in his thoughts.

Mary sits behind her desk, looking like a headmistress about to severely punish her unruly pupils.

“It has come to my attention that Henry is spending time with Percy Okonjo.”

Philip’s stomach drops as he turns to his younger brother, whose already pale complexion has gone ashen. He purses his lips and lowers his gaze to his lap as Beatrice releases a soft gasp.

None of this escapes Mary’s attention.

Philip gestures towards Mary, trying to divert her attention while giving Henry a moment to collect himself. "Percy Okonjo comes from a well-respected lineage and is involved in numerous charitable endeavors. He recently inaugurated a new orphanage in Brooklyn."

Mary shoots him a piercing glare. "But he's also a vampire. How did you come to know him?"

"He's not a malevolent vampire," Philip argues, though Mary's expression suggests his efforts are futile. "We run in the same circles. Mom and Dad supported his orphanage initiative, and—" He cuts himself off mid-sentence because he knows he made a mistake just as the words are out.

How bad of a mistake he doesn’t know yet, but the look on Mary’s face doesn’t bode well.

The tension in the room heightens as Mary's gaze narrows. "Is that so?"

He doesn’t answer, a sour feeling crawling at the base of his stomach.

“There are no good or bad vampires, Philip. They are just filthy creatures, and it is our duty to get rid of them, no matter what they look like. Henry is not supposed to engage in any way with them, and he knows better than that, which is extremely disappointing.”

Realizing the futility of further discussion, Philip refrains from elaborating, wary of drawing Mary's ire or endangering Henry further.

Henry, silent until now, betrays his discomfort through tense posture and flushed cheeks. Philip senses his brother's simmering anger just beneath the surface.

“Am I being clear, Henry?”

“Perfectly clear, Gran,” Henry replies. The tone is dry, but thankfully, Mary doesn’t call him on it.

“I hope so. I would hate to have to take matters into my own hands.”

The threat is limpid, even ominous, and with one last warning look, she leaves the room, leaving the three of them in various states of shock and confusion.

“Fuck,” Philip mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose and ignoring the surprised looks his siblings throw at him. Indeed, he doesn’t swear often, and certainly not in front of them, but the situation seems to require it.

“She certainly did not seem happy to know about Mom and Dad’s involvement with Percy,” Bea says, her voice quivering slightly and her complexion drained of its usual color.

“I should have kept my mouth shut, but I honestly thought she knew. Which, in retrospect, is a bit daft on my part,” Philip sighs.

“It’s alright, Pip. You were trying to defend me. Besides, it’s not like they hid anything. It’s only because I spent time with him that she took notice, and we all know why,” Henry chimes in, his face closed and somber.

Bea reaches for his hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.“I’m not sure what offends her the most: that you would shag a man, that he is black, or that he is a vampire.”

“Bea,” Philip chastises her half-heartedly, but when he hears Henry’s soft laugh, he lets out one too. “Probably all three.”

“So,” he adds, “I don’t want to sound alarmist, but I still think we should warn Percy. Just to be on the safe side.”

Beatrice’s eyes widen. “You think she could….? I know Percy is not a peerage member, but he is still a prominent name in society. His…disappearance would definitely cause some stir.”

"It pains me to admit it, but I believe she could. And she will. I don't want to dwell on the negative possibilities," Philip emphasizes, noticing Henry's distressed expression. "But it's Gran."

"I suppose we should exercise more caution for a while. Percy mentioned expanding the shelters to America; perhaps it's the right time. Like you, I can't trust Gran to remain passive, even if Percy and I no longer cross paths," Henry murmurs softly, clearly disturbed by the thought of parting ways with his closest friend. Philip senses Henry blaming himself for inadvertently involving Percy in their predicament.

"It's just a precaution; I'm sure everything will turn out fine," Philip reassures, though he doubts his own words. Yet, seeing Henry and Bea's tension ease slightly, he feels relief despite deceiving them.

Philip has always trusted his instincts, and the fact that he has been so catastrophically right about them will haunt him for the rest of his days.

Two weeks later, Arthur Fox is found dead in an alley behind Drury Lane, allegedly the victim of a random mugging.

Six weeks later, with the help of Percy, who made arrangements from across the pond, Philip puts his siblings on a ship to America, wishing desperately it won’t be the last he will see of them.

**********

Brooklyn, Prospect Park, April 1891

The situation isn't exactly dire, but with four vampires closing in on Henry, the odds aren't exactly in his favor. However, as they say in America, this isn't his first rodeo. (It's amusing how you pick up expressions when you befriend a Texan vampire with ridiculously long eyelashes, but that's beside the point right now.)

Henry swiftly dispatches two vampires (not that he's boasting). Dealing with the third requires a bit more effort, but he handles it easily (again, not boasting). As he prepares to face the fourth, stake at the ready, the vampire vanishes in a cloud of dust, revealing another vampire with glossy dark curls and an infuriating smirk.

“You’re welcome, your Majesty.”

Henry's heart skips a beat at the warmth in that voice and the mischief in those brown eyes, cursing the effect it always holds on him.

“I was handling the situation. But I have manners, so thank you, I suppose.”

“Where’s Beatrice?”

“At home. She was feeling a bit under the weather.”

Alex frowns. “Oh. Will she be alright?”

“Just a migraine. I’ll send her your regards. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.”

There is no sarcasm in his voice, but Alex raises his hands defensively. “Hey, your sister likes me. She hasn’t threatened to stake me in a while.”

Henry’s lips quirks up. “Did she before?”

“Once. Not in so many words, but still. We were talking about you.”

“Ah, yes. Protective older sister.”

Alex rolls his eyes. “Tell me about it.”

"Was that where you've been these past few days? Visiting your sister in Washington?" Henry inquires.

Alex's grin widens. "Ah, so you noticed my absence."

Henry considers denying it but quickly decides against it. What would be the use? He simply shrugs. "Perhaps."

He heads back towards the park entrance, where his carriage awaits, confident that Alex will trail behind. He's starting to understand the vampire's patterns.

True to expectation, Alex follows without fail.

"So... Are you finished for the night?" Alex queries casually.

"I believe so. Why?" Henry responds.

Alex shrugs, a picture of nonchalance. "Care for a drink? The Club on Seventh Avenue might still be open."

Henry’s heart rate quickens its pace. So far, they have shared a few drinks at receptions, but this is different. He knows men often frequent such clubs for political discussions and entertainment over expensive spirits, and he wouldn’t even think twice about going with anyone else. But there is something in Alex’s eyes when he looks at him, especially since that evening in the library. A dangerous glint, a hunger that has nothing to do with his lust for blood and everything to do with pure, carnal desire.

A temptation Henry knows he must resist, no matter how strong the pull.

"I should return and check on Bea," he replies, listening to the voice of reason in his mind while silencing the one in his heart.

Disappointment briefly flickers across Alex's face but swiftly transforms into a smile. "Of course. I understand."

Henry's attention drifts as he catches sight of something behind his companion. He tenses, every sense heightened.

"Alex..." he murmurs, the shift in his tone catching the vampire's notice.

"What is it?"

"A werewolf is headed our way."

Alex pivots, spotting the creature further down their path, its fur gleaming in the moonlight.

It seems oblivious to their presence, swaying slightly on its feet and emitting low growls. Henry watches it closely for a moment. This isn't a predatory werewolf; it appears disoriented and lost.

Instinctively, Henry seizes Alex's arm and guides him behind himself. They retreat cautiously, seeking cover behind a nearby tree.

.“Please tell me you have that handy little pistol you pulled on me that first time,” and Henry feels Alex’s exhale of relief against his neck as he fishes out the gun from his coat.

Alex is standing very close to him, closer than it is strictly necessary, but Henry doesn’t feel the need to call him on it. He already knows the werewolf is not a threat to either of them, but for some reason, having Alex squirming behind him is kind of thrilling. Also, it’s not as if the vampire doesn’t tease him frequently on all sorts of things.

Alex clears his throat as the werewolf slowly approaches. “What the fuck are you waiting for, Fox? I’m sure I don’t have to tell you how fucking lethal a werewolf scratch would be to little old me, right? And that there’s no cure?”

“Of course I know,” Henry says, eyes still on the creature. Just because he enjoys this moment doesn’t mean he will take any risk with their safety.

“Then shoot it!”

Henry turns to him with a smirk. “Only if you say please.”

The disbelief on Alex’s face at that moment is priceless, prompting Henry to laugh, which attracts the werewolf’s attention.

“Oh shit,” Alex whimpers, and Henry decides to take him out of his misery and pulls the trigger, shooting the creature in the leg. There is a howl of pain as it falls heavily on the grass.

"Wouldn't it be more efficient to aim for the heart?" Alex quips, dripping with sarcasm. Henry brushes off the comment, moving closer as Alex follows cautiously.

“You’re a little shit, you know that?” he calls out, his tone both exasperated and amused.

Henry laughs again—something that seems to happen a lot when Alex is around, but now is not the time to dwell on that —and by the time he’s kneeling next to the body, the werewolf has returned to its human form. Henry is glad to know his instincts were right.

Alex finally joins him. “Woah. It’s just a kid.”

Henry nods. “He's a fledgling, which is why I shot his leg. He’s been recently turned.”

“You noticed all that while he was walking towards us?” Alex asks, and Henry tries hard not to preen under his impressed tone.

“It’s my job, Alex. Though my Gran would have me exterminate them all, I've learned things aren't always so black and white.”

"Guess having half-demonic blood helps," Alex remarks casually, a mischievous grin playing on his lips.

Henry whips his head around while tending to the young man's wound. "How do you know?"

“Your father told me he was a wizard when I met him in London a few years ago.”

Henry, taken aback, says, "I remember you mentioning seeing him on stage and meeting him once, but you never mentioned having a conversation where he outright told you he was a wizard."

The revelation puzzles Henry. While not entirely a secret, Arthur wasn't one to flaunt his magical abilities, especially after marrying into a lineage of slayers. Discussions about it were rare, particularly in the presence of his grandmother, who harbored evident disapproval of the union and her son-in-law, maintaining a chilly civility towards him.

Now, Henry realizes she was merely biding her time.

His father's openness with Alex that day suggests there was something about him Arthur found trustworthy.

Like father like son, right?

Shaking off the distraction, Henry refocuses. "Well, that's a tale for another day. Will you assist me in getting him into my carriage? I need to take him to Percy."

Alex does a double-take. "Percy? As in Percy Okonjo?"

"The very same."

"You're acquainted with Percy Okonjo?"

"He's my best mate, Alex. Haven't you noticed us conversing at recent gatherings?"

"No! Wait... Percy Okonjo is your best friend? Vampire Percy Okonjo?"

Henry, growing irritated, crosses his arms. "Repeating his name several times will not summon him magically. How do you know him?"

"I've been assisting him with the shelters, contributing financially when possible, and aiding newly turned vampires. I met him a few months after he settled in New York."

"Seriously?" Henry reflects on his recent chat with Percy, where the latter had played coy about Alex. "That little weasel," Henry grumbles, though he knows it's unfair. Percy was just respecting Alex's privacy, much like he does for Henry.

"Oh, come on..."

Henry sighs. "I wasn't talking about you. Never mind about that. Can you help me or not?"

"I can, but we're not done talking about this," he remarks as Henry grabs the unconscious young man by the shoulders while Alex grabs his legs, and they head towards the park entrance.

“I’m serious, Henry,” Alex persists, and Henry rolls his eyes. Does that man ever stop yapping? It’s endearing, but now is really not the time."I need to know everything about the slayer and his vampire best mate," he adds with a dreadful British accent.

"I fail to see why you're so surprised. You know where I stand on the whole slaying business. Plus, I'm here with you, right? And unlike my sister, I've never threatened to stake you."

"No, you threatened to shoot me instead, which isn't quite as lethal, but still. And we've only met in public places so far, and, most importantly, I saved your life earlier tonight."

Henry snorts. “Alright, let’s not get carried away here. And please tone it down. I don’t want to attract every vampire and their grandmother nearby. It’s already a miracle no one has shown up yet after the gunshot.”

They carefully place the body in the carriage, mindful of his injury.

"How long have you two known each other?" Alex queries as Henry prepares to take the reins, prompting a chuckle from the slayer.

“Good grief, you’re like a dog with a bone.”

"More like a vampire with a tasty neck at his disposal," Alex quips, a playful smirk dancing on his lips. "And yes, I know your stance on this, but you two are so different, even putting aside the slayer/vampire thing. And oh my God, I have so many questions. First, how-"

Henry is not sure what goes through his mind at that moment, but what is certain is that his brain is not involved in any way in his impulsive action.

His heart is. His heart wins for once in his life.

He seizes Alex by the neck, drawing him into a fervent kiss that leaves no room for words. For a fleeting moment, a serene quiet envelops them as Alex stiffens, then yields, wrapping his arm around Henry's waist to deepen the kiss.

Alright, maybe Henry was naive, thinking he just wanted to shut Alex up for a minute. He hadn't expected Alex to shove his tongue in his mouth so eagerly.

(He had absolutely expected it.)

A low moan erupts from one of their chests; Henry isn't sure whose. But he's acutely aware of Alex's body pressed against his, the softness of his lips, and the delicious way Alex's tongue slides against his own, licking, tasting, taking. He pulls back briefly, only to capture Henry's bottom lip, biting it gently.

Even in these circumstances, Henry should have known Alex would be a biter.

He pulls away as abruptly as he initiated the kiss, his breath erratic, his vision unfocused, and his senses reeling. Alex looks dazed, his hair disheveled, and Henry vaguely recalls threading his fingers through those curls. He had wanted to know how they felt for so long, but the intensity of the kiss left his memory a blur.

“That’s one way to shut me up, I guess,” Alex breathes, his voice barely above a whisper. His gaze is filled with wonder, and his fluttering eyelids stir something within Henry.

Stepping back, Henry puts some distance between them to quell the urge for a repeat performance. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. It was highly inappropriate."

Alex rolls his eyes, a smirk playing on his lips. "Didn't seem like I minded, did it?"

Henry swallows hard. "No."

“Well then. Feel free to shut me up like this anytime.”

Henry certainly will do no such thing, but he deems it more reasonable to drop the subject.

“Where is your carriage? Did you ride here ?”

Alex opens his mouth and closes it as if he wants to add something about what occurred between them but then thinks better of it.

“No, I walked.”

Henry frowns. “At this hour? It doesn’t seem very safe.”

"Henry, I’m a vampire. I can take care of myself, believe it or not. The worst that could happen is me tripping and falling on my own stake, which, admittedly, would be a very undignified way to go."

Henry crosses his arms and nods toward the unconscious form on the carriage floor. "And what about that werewolf?"

Alex shrugs. "I can run very fast," he replies, then adds, "I have trouble sleeping, and walking helps quiet my mind."

Henry shakes his head, a smile breaking the tension. He remembers Alex mentioning his mental struggles and understands the issue with sleep.

"Alright, hop on. We'll stop by Percy’s, and then I'll drop you off at your place."

The drive to Percy’s house is mostly silent—not uncomfortable, but Henry’s thoughts keep drifting to that kiss. The way Alex's body fit against his like two pieces of a puzzle, the sensation of his lips and tongue, the softness of his hair beneath Henry’s fingers—yes, he remembers it vividly now.

Henry also recalls that this is the sole and final kiss they will ever share, a realization that casts a heavy shadow over his mood and leaves a bitter, lingering taste in his mouth.

He unwittingly painted a target on his best friend’s back a few years ago. The thought of potentially repeating that mistake with Alex now fills him with a deep-seated fear and a resolve to avoid such a risk at all costs.

The logical course of action would be to sever ties completely before he’s too deep - even though he knows it's already too late. Moreover, considering Alex's nature, he's confident he would vehemently oppose such a decision. Alex is not one to surrender without a fight.

Bea’s words from that night months ago ring in his head. She was wrong, though. Alex didn’t break Henry’s heart. Henry did that all to himself.

But he has no other choice.

He’s relieved when he sees Percy’s house in the distance.

Percy owns a terraced house in Park Slope, one side serving as his private residence and the other as the first shelter he established in the area. Henry parks discreetly by the side entrance, designed for horses and carriages. This was the safest way to deliver the unconscious werewolf to Shaan, Percy’s trusted assistant.

He and Alex are then led to Percy’s study, who welcomes them with a big smile.

“Well, this is an interesting development—my favorite slayer and favorite vampire. Seems like you've both had quite the night,” he remarks.

“What happened to your hair?” Alex interjects, pointing to Percy’s new lavender locks.

Percy chuckles. “Ah, just a little experiment. What do you think?”

“It’s... certainly unique,” Henry replies cautiously.

“So, what’s the story there?” Percy prods, gesturing towards the pair.

"I was out on patrol, and Alex here was..." Henry turns to his companion, arching an eyebrow.

"Feeding," Alex chimes in first, followed by a smirk. "And saving your ass."

Henry rolls his eyes. "We bumped into each other, then a werewolf showed up. Alex took cover behind me-"

Alex scoffs. “Hey, you pulled me behind you, and hello, vampire? Werewolf? Not my idea of a fair fight. Excuse me for having some infinitesimal shred of self-preservation. It doesn’t make me a coward.”

“I didn’t call you a coward, Alex. Don’t put words in my mouth.”

Which, he realizes belatedly, was the absolute worst thing to say. He sees the grin spreading Alex’s - so, so soft - lips and turns to Percy.

“I’m parched. Would you have anything to drink, perchance?”

Percy glances between them, amusement and curiosity dancing in his eyes.

“Where are my manners? You two indeed look like you could use some refreshments. Alexander dear?”

“Can I use your water closets first? I need to wash my hands.”

"By all means, babes. You know the way.”

Alex leaves, and Percy pours two drinks, leaves one on the table, and hands the other to Henry with a knowing look.

“What?” Henry asks. He knows he won’t escape the Okonjo Inquisition. His best friend knows him too well. And yet, he’s never wholly prepared for Percy’s shrewd mind.

“You two kissed,” Percy states matter-of-factly rather than asking.

Henry chokes on his brandy, spitting half of it on his shirt.

“How the bloody Hell…?”

“Oh, come one, Hazza. The flushed cheeks, the starry eyes, and the extremely smug smile on Alexander’s face? This is the look of a man who finally had his dream come true.”

Henry shakes his head, a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he rubs at his wet shirt with the handkerchief Percy just gave him. “If kissing me is his dream, the bar is not very high. It’s not exactly the grandest achievement.”

“Tsk Tsk, no self-depreciation under my room. Judging by the look on his face, it seemed highly satisfactory. How did it happen? Did you like it?”

Henry avoids the second question.."I kissed him to silence his incessant chatter in the middle of Prospect Park. He would have probably attracted all kinds of unsavory creatures. I had no choice, really.”

“You could have just asked him to shut up,” Percy says, his dark eyes twinkling.

Henry lets out a brief laugh. "Believe me, I tried. But have you met him?"

Alex returns, and Percy hands him his drink, which he gulps in one go, eyeing Henry’s stained shirt.

“What happened to you?”

“Nothing. Are you ready to go?”

They bid Percy goodbye and head towards Alex's home. Conversation flows smoothly, ranging from Percy's latest hair color antics to the juiciest gossip from high society, all previous awkwardness seemingly forgotten.

Until they reach Alex's doorstep.

"Thank you for the company, Alex. I suppose I'll be seeing you soon."

Alex hesitates before stepping off, meeting Henry's gaze with a sly grin. "So, we're just going to pretend it didn't happen?"

"What are you talking about?" Henry feigns innocence, though he knows Alex sees right through it.

Rolling his eyes, Alex replies, "The kiss, Henry."

"Oh, that." Henry shrugs nonchalantly. "There's nothing to discuss. And it won't happen again anyway."

Alex remains undeterred, his smile widening. "We'll see about that, Lord Mountchristen-Windsor."

Alex exits the carriage, leaving Henry struggling to contain his amusement.

"You're a demon," He scolds.

Alex laughs, opening his arms, his eyes twinkling under the warm light of the lamppost. “Well, yeah. Literally, actually. But you like that about me.”

And then he has the audacity to wink.

Henry raises an eyebrow. “That is awfully presumptuous of you to assume.”

Alex flashes a knowing grin. "I'll catch you later, your Majesty."

Henry watches him climb the stairs toward his front door, his mind racing with thoughts. After a brief internal struggle, he makes up his mind and calls him back.

“Alex?”

The vampire turns around, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s not common knowledge, for obvious reasons, but…there is a cure. If something ever happens…find Bea or me. Good night, Alex,” he says, shaking the reins lightly to get the horse going, not leaving time for Alex to answer. He doesn’t feel like being subjected to another barrage of questions tonight.

Henry’s heart races as he guides the carriage through the dimly lit streets, the echo of their exchanged words lingering in his mind. He can’t shake the memory of Alex's playful demeanor, the warmth of his laughter, and the electrifying moment of their kiss.

His revelation to Alex of a cure for a werewolf bite—even without disclosing its specifics—is not something he shared lightly. It is a close-guarded secret, known only to a select few inside the Slayer community. If this came out, the scandal and repercussions would be unprecedented, with Henry’s whole family at extreme risk.

It won’t happen, though. Despite their acquaintance dating back barely six months and their blossoming friendship a few weeks ago, Henry is not just convinced but unwaveringly believes that he can trust Alex completely.

Once home, he checks on Bea, who’s sleeping soundly, before retreating to his room, washing up, and sliding under the covers. Fitzwilliam settles on his calves, his weight bringing a sense of comfort.

His body still tingles with the memory of the kiss, and he almost feels Alex’s warm breath against his lips again. Euphoria, mixed with desperation, fills his chest, creating a dichotomy that leaves his heart and mind reeling.

He knows his chance at happiness is within reach. All his life, he has dreamed of finding someone like Alex, the kind of love his parents shared despite the odds stacked against them. It might sound insane since Alex and he haven’t known each other that long, but every cell in his body calls out to the vampire whenever they are around. A yearning to touch his skin, inhale his scent, lose himself in his chocolate eyes, and create a bubble of bliss and peace for just the two of them. He could decide to throw caution to the wind and seize that chance, consequences be damned.

A pained exhale escapes his throat, the previous euphoria replaced by sudden emptiness.

He’s not allowed to dream like this.

It would have been lovely, though.

****

Portofino, Italy - April 1912

Henry shuts the front door behind him, eagerly unfolding the telegram just delivered to their villa. A smile graces his lips as he recognizes his sister's name at the bottom.

Ascending to the first floor, he steps into the living room, bathed in the soft glow of morning sunlight pouring through the wide-open French doors. The gentle breeze carries the sweet fragrances of blooming flowers from the garden and the unmistakable scent of the Mediterranean Sea, its turquoise waters sparkling in the distance.

His gaze lands on a photograph of Alex and him, captured at the 1900 World Exhibition. His mind drifts back to a spring in Paris, where they whispered promises of eternity on the second floor of the Eiffel Tower.

Twelve years later, their vows remain unbroken.

Nearly twenty-one years have passed since Henry took a leap of faith, falling into Alex’s waiting arms, who caught him effortlessly and has never let go.

Henry steps onto the terrace, joining Alex, clad in scandalously snug shorts that leave little to nothing to the imagination. Despite questioning the point of wearing them, Henry certainly doesn’t complain, especially considering their secluded hillside home, a place blessed with privacy and a stunning view that stretches as far as the eye can see. The view from the terrace is truly breathtaking. They can see Portofino’s old harbor with its traditional Ligurian houses painted in shades of yellow, pink, and orange.

Contrary to popular vampire depictions, Alex is far from the expected archetype. In fact, with his fair complexion, Henry aligns more closely with the stereotype. Currently basking in the sunlight, Alex embodies the essence of his sun-worshipping Aztec ancestors.

“Was it Bea?” he inquires as he hands Henry a glass of lemonade.

"Yes, she's due here tomorrow morning with Philip and Martha. They made a stop in London to visit Mum. And June mentioned that Percy and Nora will join us in the early afternoon."

Alex grins. "Looks like it's going to be a full house this weekend. I love it."

They had invested in the villa a few years back, envisioning it as a perfect getaway bathed in sunlight, with enough space to accommodate their entire family and circle of friends.

With a smirk, Alex grabs a towel from a nearby lounge chair and drapes it over the terrace stone railing. Then, he pulls Henry close, seating him on it and nestling between his legs, planting a deep kiss on his lips. Henry moans in his mouth as Alex presses his pelvis against his, making his intention clear.

“It seems to me your intentions are less than honorable, Mr Claremont-Diaz.”

"Oh, my intentions are positively scandalous, sweetheart. Consider it a reward."

"A reward for what?"

"For railing me thoroughly through the mattress earlier this morning. Definitely one of the best orgasms of my life.”

Henry smiles, recalling the morning's events vividly: Alex, a delightful wreck, surrendering to him as Henry pinned his wrists above his head and drove into him relentlessly.

Alex brings him back to the present as his hands grasp Henry's shorts and ease them down his leg.

"Leave my shirt on, please," Henry breathes. "I don't want to get a sunburn."

Alex chuckles and slips his hands under Henry's shirt, gliding up and down his back.

He wets his fingers, finding Henry’s hole and circling his rim before gently inserting one finger. Henry emits a soft moan as he wraps his legs around Alex's waist.

"Don't hold back, baby. Let me hear those lovely sounds."

There’s an exhilarating thrill in doing this in broad daylight. Henry tilts his head back, exposing his face to the sun, while Alex lavishes his neck with kisses and gentle nips as his fingers work their magic until Henry can’t take it anymore.

“I’m ready, love,” he pleads, heat spiraling low in his belly as he slowly loses the ability to think and revels in the myriad of sensations brought by Alex”s touch.

Alex pushes down his own shorts and puts his hands under Henry’s ass, lifting him, and Henry sinks on his cock as they both let out strangled, matching groans. They don’t move for a minute, Henry relishing in being filled, surrounded by Alex’s everything - his body, his scent, his dick, his mouth trailing on the sensitive inside of Henry’s elbow as he patiently waits to get the green light to move, which Henry gives him by raising his hips slightly before sinking down once again.

Alex puts one arm around his waist and lowers Henry onto the towel again, his other hand settling beside him on the railing for support as he starts thrusting. Initially slow and steady, Alex quickens his pace when Henry tugs on his curls, eliciting another low growl from the vampire.

“You feel so good, sweetheart,” Alex stutters as their eyes meet, his gaze full of awe and devotion, vast and unending, brighter than the sun shining on them.

Adjusting his grip, Alex hikes Henry’s leg up, tilting his hips so that on his next thrust, he hits Henry's prostate at just the right angle. Henry’s cock is trapped between their stomachs, creating delicious friction with each push. Alex is so deep now that every movement brings them one tremor closer to an earthquake.

“Oh fuck…Bloody Hell,” Henry cries out. The tension in his gut is tightening, and an overwhelming rush of pleasure steals his breath as his cock jerks, and he comes all over their stomach with a soft laugh. Their lips meet for a messy, passionate kiss, all teeth and tongue, as Alex follows suit, falling over the edge right after him. Henry praises him sweetly, and Alex's erratic movements only intensify the aftershocks of Henry's orgasm.

"I love you," Henry whispers as the last remnants of pleasure course through them. They share another kiss, their heavy breathing gradually slowing. A blinding smile stretches across Alex's mouth.

“I love you more,” he replies, and Henry rolls his eyes fondly at their never-ending debate.

Alex effortlessly lifts Henry and pulls out, and Henry can’t help but let a small whimper escape at the loss. Alex chuckles softly and moves him to a lounge bed in the shade. After wiping them both with a towel, Alex lies beside him, taking him in his arms, and Henry rests his head on his chest with a contented sigh. They are both sweaty and sticky, but Henry doesn’t care, lost in a post-orgasmic haze. Alex's after-sex scent fills his senses, mingling with his own, its unique fragrance enveloping them in a comforting bubble. Henry lifts his arm, offering his wrist to Alex, who kisses and licks it. He lets out a soft gasp as Alex's fangs graze his wrist, a shiver running down his spine. The intimacy of the moment deepens as Alex tenderly kisses the spot, sending waves of renewed desire coursing through Henry. He feels the warmth of Alex’s body against his, the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest soothing. Henry's breath hitches as Alex's tongue flicks over his pulse point.

Alex looks up, his eyes dark and full of mischief, as if sensing Henry's cock renewed interest."You taste amazing," Alex murmurs against his skin, the words vibrating through Henry.

Slayer and vampire stamina is truly a wonderful thing.

Alex delicately pierces the skin, savoring the taste of blood as Henry moans with pleasure. Alex doesn't indulge much, but once finished, he delicately licks the puncture wound before leaning in for a deep kiss. Henry never ceases to be amazed by the intoxicating coppery flavor of his blood on Alex's tongue.

“When are we supposed to leave?” he asks after a moment, their bubble bursting as he is reminded of their impending departure.

Alex squints his eyes, still a bit drunk on Henry’s blood. “April 10th…We have to be in Southampton next Monday. We board on Tuesday morning.”

"Could we extend our stay until next Sunday? I'm not eager to return just yet. Would that fit with your work schedule?"

"I'll make it happen, baby if that's what you want,” Alex says, settling them comfortably on the chair for a nice nap. "I'll reach out to the White Star Line about a refund. Can't guarantee they'll approve it, considering it was the ship's maiden voyage."

Henry nods, a small smile playing on his lips as he relaxes into Alex's embrace. "Thank you. It's just... I want a bit more time with you, away from everything.”

Their mouth locks together again, a chaste kiss only meant to remind them of the bond they share. It is a moment of connection, a silent promise of love. They pull away, but the warmth of that brief touch remains.

“What do you want to do this afternoon?”

“Alex, you just fucked my brains out. I’m not having any coherent thoughts right now.”

“If you are using the word ‘coherent’, I’m not sure I did such a great job. Still, you’re welcome,” he adds with a smug grin. “We should buy one of those fancy automobiles, see the countryside instead of having sex in here all the time.”

Henry snorts. “Indeed, what a chore.”

Alex’s hand reaches for his, entwining their fingers, and Henry’s eyes trail to his forearm, where a mark lingers. A reminiscence of a haunting night over two decades ago that Henry will never forget, no matter how hard he tries.

Vampires are not supposed to have scars.

“Hey, where did you go?” Alex asks sleepily, sensing the shift in Henry’s mood.

Henry kisses his jaw. “Nowhere, darling. I’m here with you.”

Always.

#red white and royal blue #firstprince #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #Henry The Reluctant Slayer #rwrb fic #Sophie1973

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nonhumanwithin · 15 hours

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hi! im not exactly sure what i am (i think i would best be described as something like a demon and an animal), and i was wondering if you had any advice regarding managing a prey drive.

if it isnt clear by that first thing, im still figuring things out about myself and piecing things together. i do not have any past memories, but i have thoughts, needs, and occasional phantom sensations that i believe relate to my identity.

one thing ive come to realize is that im 99% sure ive had a prey drive since childhood. i used to manage it by chasing animals, but now that im older (…and larger and living somewhere else), that’s no longer an option for me. it’s also worth nothing that my prey drive became less intense for many years and has “come back” somewhat recently, so i didnt have to do much in the time between then and now.

i try to get my energy out by playing animal games online or playing with my dogs, but it just doesn’t feel the same and i get bored quick. im also worried that i may come to see my friends as prey and hurt them. this is obviously something i would prefer to avoid, but i know my emotions and urges have gotten the better of me these days. im VERY lucky my partner likes this kind of thing, otherwise id have next to no outlet whatsoever.

so my question is: what can i do to safely satisfy my urges and get rid of excess energy in regards to my prey drive? a list of activities, games, or general advice would help. thank you :)

Hey! I don't have a lot of experience with coping with prey drive personally but I'll do my best to help, maybe others who see this post can also leave some suggestions! :) I will say that if you are having intrusive thoughts about prey drive, I want to remind you that it is not your fault and you will not act on it. Dealing with intrusive thoughts can be tricky because you don't want to create a compulsive reaction to "get rid of it" because this can lead to OCD or OCD-like symptoms. It's important to desensitize yourself to your intrusive thoughts and not give them power over you. I saw a post about it somewhere, possibly on twitter but I wouldn't be able to find it again so hopefully someone else has some more specific advice!

A helpful question to ask yourself is what about your prey drive specifically is the thing that gives you urges the most? Like, do you most have the urge to chase things, or is it more the hunting part, like sinking your teeth into something or pouncing, etc? Think about the specific action that would satisfy you the most and try to recreate that somehow, like in a video game or by watching movies or finding a food that you can tear into in the way you like, etc.

Or if it's more an understimulated/overly energetic thing you could try exercising. Not just typical stuff like lifting weights or doing situps but maybe try some type of sport or something like jumprope, swimming, hiking, etc. Playing a sport that satisfies those prey drive urges such as chasing other people would be a great idea! I find that even just throwing a tennis ball at the wall and catching it can sort of replicate that feeling of "catching animal/thing" for me personally.

Another suggestion I have is to use creativity as an outlet. Draw, write a story or poem or song, whatever you want. It doesn't even have to be good at all and you don't have to share it with anyone!

That's all I've got but I hope this helps at least a little :)

#otherkin #alterhuman #kin advice #otherkin advice #therian #kin #prey drive #nonhuman

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madam-wakefield · 6 months

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Family Artwork

Just a little fic for the first day of @berenaadvent and the 3rd day prompt “Silhouette”

Read on A03

If you’d told a 15 year old Bernie that one day she’d have a wife she’d have told you you were crazy. Of course by then she knew she had feelings for women, she also knew she was destined to join the army and that she would never share that first fact with another living sole.

If you’d have told a 35 year old Bernie that she’d have a wife one day she’d have told you that she’d lost her chance. That she’d made her choice to join to RAMC and marry Marcus. She’d have said that for her the legalisation of gay and lesbian people serving openly in the British army had come too late. Of course she was overjoyed it had finally happened but it was still too late for her.

If you’d have told a 51 year old Bernie that she’d have a wife one day she’d have told you that she was no good at relationships. That she’d ruined her marriage, ruined her friendship with Alex through the affair that had led to the breakdown of everything else.

Yet here she is now 62 years old, watching her three grandchildren, Florence, Mabel and Ezra and one grandniece, Greta, run towards the castle, as she walks hand in hand with her wife down Disney’s Main Street, on what is unfortunately the last day of their holiday. She struggles still sometimes, still has days where she is riddled with guilt about all the mistakes she’s made in her life, but right here right now she knows she’s exactly where she should be.

Her and her wife are lucky enough that they have a certain calibre of job, that has afforded them a comfortable life, so last year in lieu of Christmas presents they’d revealed they were taking their children and each of their grandchildren, and of course Jason and his daughter to Disney World.

It of course had taken a lot of logistics to ensure both Bernie and Serena, as well as Cameron and Morven, Charlotte and Lizzie, Elinor and Grant and Jason and Greta could all have holiday at the same time. They’ve been naughty and taken the grandchildren out of school, no way they could have organised everyone’s time off work with a school holiday. It’s all be so worth it though, the memories they’ve made together, these past two weeks, as a big giant mixed up family have been more than worth it. And Bernie knows that despite all the mistakes she’s made this is exactly where she’s meant to be, that she’s truly happy.

“You alright?” Serena says squeezing her hand, lets Bernie know she’s been quiet and musing just a little too long.

“Yes just thinking about how happy I am,” it’s as she turns to smile at Serena that she spots it. The silhouette studio off to her right. The images look so beautiful, can’t help built stop and look, the sudden and unexpected pause pulling on Serena’s arm and putting her just a little off balance. Bernie helps steady her, apologising earnestly. Before pointing and speaking

“Aren’t they beautiful?” She watches as Serena catches sight of them, eyes going wide.

“They are but from the look in your face you already have an idea forming in your head.” Serena says nudging her gently. Bernie loves the fact the woman she married can read her every expression, that she doesn’t have to hide herself.

“The art work that we have never been able to find for above the fireplace, I think we might have found it. Five of these, one for each little family arranged together to make a five like on a dice.”

Bernie allows herself to be pulled to face Serena, moulds easily as Serena leans in to kiss her quick and gentle. “You my dear are a genius, they’d look beautiful.”

That is how the next hour finds each little family in turn sitting for a silhouette. Serena and Bernie go first, their grandchildren looking in awe as the artist freehand cuts their joint silhouette out of the black card, before placing it inside the thick black oval frame. Charlotte, Lizzie and Mabel go next, being the eldest grandchild she always says it’s her job to show the others how to behave. Elinor, Grant and Erza go next, Erza is the youngest of their grandchildren, is a little impatient to get to some more rides. So after they’ve finished they send them on their way with Charlotte, Lizzie and Mabel. Tell them they’ll message when they’ll finish. Jason offers for Cameron, Morven and Florence to go next, Bernie and Serena know it’s because he doesn’t want the audience as he sits for his portrait so sends them to join Charlotte and Elinor after they’ve finished. They themselves wander slowly around the shop for the length of time it takes Jason’s little family to be finished.

It’s Bernie who takes the two bags with the carefully wrapped frames and keeps them safe for the rest of the day. That evening when they stand together to watch the fireworks, Bernie can’t help but watch Serena’s silhouette, illuminated by the colourful lights she looks as beautiful as ever and Bernie’s breath is once again take away by how lucky she is.

When they get home, Serena takes the suitcase and sets about sorting the washing while Bernie takes the bags containing the five silhouette portraits, grabs the stepladder and her tool kit and sets about finally adding their fireplace art to the living room. Every day from then on it’s her little reminder of the family she gets to call hers, of everything that is good in her world. That somehow all the decisions in her life have led to this and that there is nothing she’d rather have more and no where else she’d rather be.

#Berena Advent 2023 #Berena Advent Silhouette #Berena #Bernie Wolfe #Serena Campbell #Madam Wakefield Writes #Berena Fanfic

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alexissara · 1 year

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15 Years Of Love

Today marks my 15 year anniversary with my Fiancé. It means officially half of my life has been with them. I'm 30 years old now and when I was 15 we started dating. I was a freshmen in high school, I wasn't out, I casually might have said I was bi but I had not yet come to realize that I was ace, a lesbian, a trans woman, or polyamarous at the time. Nor had he realized he was trans masc gender fucky pansexual polyamarous sexy little goblin. They and I did not have the most clear start, as teens we both did and said plenty of things we wished we never said or did to one another. Still in 15 years we've every year become more of ourselves and as a consequence fallen more in love.

It is wild to think how radically different we both are from where we started and how our love and selves have bloomed. Being with someone as long as we have clearly shapes you. This kind of love is the kind of love where you become the same kind of weirdos in so many ways but we're still also very different people. We have so many layers of inside jokes, so many shared memories, so much life experience that it is impossible to really decipher us if you were a fly on the wall. It is such a joyful life to be able to live as silly as fucking possible together. We are two halves of a whole without being monogamous or dependent on one another, we date separately and both have very long term committed relationships with amazing women that aren't ending any time soon. It's like a Soul Mates AU if they weren't hyper monogamous where somehow we were meant to each other.

Our love story is funny too, we were enemies to lovers over a mutual crush. At the time they didn't know they liked girls and I didn't know I was a girl but we both had a crush on a mutual bi friend of ours. We met at a Japanese cultural festival both wanting to learn more about the culture sure but also both wanting to spend time with our crush. Neither of us particularly liked each other and in fact they gave advice to my crush that going on one date with me didn't mean we were dating and she didn't owe me shit. Which is so true, very true and also very funny in retrospect. We add each other on myspace, I had been pretty in my depression era we talk and talk from time to time about our mutual crush and about random stuff. I decide to ask him out and he says yes. From that showing of What Happens In Vegas, a movie which is a time capsule for sure we started dating.

While our goals and ambitions have shifted radically to this day my Fiancé inspires me in my art. Even back then I knew I wanted to tell stories and they were an apple of my eye always making me want to tell more. They always supported me in making art and telling stories and acting and everything I did and I always supported them in drawing and crafting and aiming for whatever goals they wanted. Our hearts and spirits always longed for making the world better in whatever ways we could and it's something we still do together.

While we may no longer be teens caught between Emo and Scene we still get to radically be ourselves together, to express ourselves how we want and encourage each other to explore ourselves, challenge our ideas about the world and expand what we know. At the end of this year we plan on leaving our home for the whole of our relationship Texas thanks to anti trans, anti LGBT and racist laws popping up left and right. While this anniversary is huge for us the future looks so exciting with us hopefully finally leaving this hell hole behind and entering a new era of our lives with hopefully more community, love and exciting discovery along the way.

I don't know where I would be without my Fiancé, they got me through all the worst times in my life, their a part of my DNA. I feel so incredibly lucky to have had 15 years with the worlds most sweet little gender monster. This love is always going to be worth fighting for to me and I hope I can tell so many more new stories that honor the love they've given me in my life.

[If you want me to spoil my gender gremlin consider giving me money on Patreon or Ko-fi ]

#anniversary #15 year anniversary #gay #queer romance #queer love #trans t4t #T4T #t4t love #Lesbian #RL romance #Romance #RL #Life

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craicchapel · 2 years

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Just thinking of you and had to see how you are doing. Hope you are able to take some time for yourself amid the chaos that is life. Wishing you all the best as you make your way to becoming a mother a two. Please keep us updated on things if you’d like to share. :)

Thank you so much 😭😭😭 this is so sweet! I'm doing quite well!! I've been running around with my head chopped off to get everything ready for another kiddo. That probably doesn't sound fun, but it's actually motivated me to get a bunch of other random tasks done that I've wanted to accomplish since moving into our place 6 months ago lol. I feel like I've done more in 1 month than I have in the past year lol.

I also quit my job in April which I NEVER foresaw. I'm kinda sad to walk away from labor and delivery because it's a wild ride and I enjoyed it, but it got insanely stressful and unsafe. By the time I decided to leave all but 2 of my coworkers on night shift had quit and well over half of the day shift left too. We were so understaffed and it was a nightmare. I kept having horrendous shifts where it was lucky that we had decent outcomes. I realized it wasn't worth sticking around a place that puts my license and people's lives on the line just to save money (for the higher-ups🙄). Once I was out of there my life became so much less stressful.

Other than that I'm just enjoying the extra time I get to spend with Charlotte . I got married in July with a fancy courthouse wedding lmao. Which honestly was great cause the thought of having a full-on wedding makes me wanna vomit. We finally picked out a name for this next baby. We're going with Gemma. We are middle name less at the moment but oh well. I'm 37 weeks and the last time I delivered I was 38 weeks so I'm just sitting here waiting to pop. I'm having major anxiety about delivering because last time was a c-section but this time I'm going to try vaginally. I've seen too much at work to not be nervous about how it's gonna go lol. I get one period cramp and turn into a baby so yeah...we'll see 😩😂. ANYWAYS that is all. Still obsessed with my cats, still have a guinea pig trucking along, and still a mess 99% of the time. Thank you for checking in 😘, I miss this site sometimes!

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fmdxsuji · 1 year

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summary: suji encounters a fan who tells her everything she’s ever wanted to hear date: around midnight promotions word count: 676 words ooc note: -

while suji doesn’t like to make very bold, definite statements, she can’t seem to hide the fact that midnight is her favorite album to this day. that’s why she was more excited than usual for her promotional round. of course, it wouldn’t last long just like her other solo promotions, but she was still glad to be able to share it with her fans.

fan signs were always something that suji looked forward to. while she was aware that getting picked could be difficult, and she’d love to change how they worked, she couldn’t just change the industry with the snap of her fingers. that’s why she tried her best to ensure that every fan who came got their money’s worth. no matter what others may think, she knew that coming to her fan signs was not an easy task for her fans, and she wanted to make them feel appreciated.

this fan sign hadn’t been all too different from her others. she put on some cute hats and props that her fans handed to her and made sure to look at all the cameras. she listened to all her fans, and she was excited to hear that they also enjoyed this album quite a bit. there were a few fans who were upset that she didn’t come out with a power ballad, but they also made sure to add on that they still loved the shift in sound that she managed to comeback with.

suji’s going on with the event when fan number 57 gets on the stage. she’s in the middle of posing with one of her gifted props when the female approaches. while she found it impossible to remember every single fan who came by, she was pretty good at noticing if someone was here for the first time.

“is this your first time here?”

the fan simply nodded before pointing down at the album. she flipped over to the page they had assigned and read the sticky note they put down and signed it to their name. seeing that they weren’t saying much, suji thought that maybe they were nervous or shy, so she continued the conversation on her own.

“did it take you a long time to get here? do you live far away?” looking up, the fan nodded before clearing her throat. she was getting ready to ask her another question to keep the conversation flowing when the fan spoke up. she quickly finished up her signature and looked up, making sure to make eye contact.

“i know you probably hear this a lot, but i want to tell you that you really changed my life. your solo debut came out when i was in my last year of high school and i wanted to give up, but then i heard big mini world and gained lots of strength.”

as the fan spoke, suji could see her hands shaking so she reached over and grabbed them before giving her an encouraging smile. “i don’t usually try for fan signs, but i really wanted to tell you this in person. i was pretty lucky because i only bought one album and made it. am i not allowed to say that?”

suji chuckles as she shakes her head. “it’s totally fine, and i’m happy that i got to meet you as well. thank you for telling me that. i’ll remember it forever, i promise,” she states before offering a pinky promise. her fan manager was telling them that the fan’s time was up, and so the fan quickly stood up.

this wasn’t the first time that she’s heard such words, but they never get old. it’s exactly the reason why she started making music, and she was glad that the fan mustered up the courage and told her about it, especially because it was her debut album, one that she didn’t love to go back and listen to because everything feels so amateur.

it’s reasons like this why she continues to write, and she really does think she’ll remember the fan forever.

#famedtask12 #( ♡ * // self para. )

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lnutile · 2 years

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Lil Bruh Gwop about Aura Glow, working experience with Lil B and Lil peep and white magic.

Lil Bruh Gwop is one of the brightest representatives of the emo pop scene. The author of such underground hits as "Shatter Me Alone" and "Come Around", that became known on the big stage thanks to the song "Aura Glow", in collaboration with Rainy Bear (Lil Skil) and produced by the old underground star YungJZAIsDead. We managed to contact with the artist and find out more about his main banger, plans and future collaborations with major artists.

- Could you introduce listeners to that song and tell how you were feeling yourself while working on this song, and something about this song in general

- It was a time of my life where I wrote Aura Glow where everything was cool and chill, going smooth for a while; doing fun activities. I believe doing what I love contributed a lot to that. Getting inspired by listening to music that I love, hanging out with family/people that care about me and doing activities that are the most fun to me. That is how you reflect anyone or anything that isn’t genuine to your well being. It’s also one of the best ways to preform white magic. Aura Glow is a composition that was created to heal you. Featuring Rainy Bear. The song will be featured on one of my projects releasing very soon. I am very happy and lucky to be able to share it with the world.

- And about your Japanese part in this song. How do you know that language and what does it mean in your music?

- Japanese is my second language so that’s how. The lyrics are translated to “Ichiban Japanese Angel”. What the lyrics mean is number one angel.

- About that YungJZAIsDead produced that song. He disappeared a couple years ago because of some personal problems.

Are you guys gonna work with him soon and would he come back to the social networks?

- Yes. He produced alot of my music, like albums worth. But he disappeared because of his own reasons. Yes we have music together. Also, He told me he is tired of working on music and that he is “kind of over it.” It’s chill though. I still support everything he does. We are close friends and still talk a lot.

- What we should expect from your future albums? What names will appear in this projects?

- Pure white magic. Healing, positive energy. Putting everything into these projects. Nothing is sugarcoated or plastic. We have alot of plans, so you will be seeing/hearing alot about everything very soon. Also, music with Lil B The Based God and Keith Ape.

- Wow! Tell us about your experience working with Lil B

- Amazing and fun. He DM’d me on a Twitter DM and texted his number, and it’s been a wrap. At the end of the day, It’s all about love. Purified positivity. That’s all that matters.

- That's amazing! Another question, do you have any unreleased or unfinished songs with the underground legend who passed away this world - Lil Peep, and if you do, would we hear it one day?

- It’s possible. But Rainy Bear (Lil Skil) is the one who recorded on the song with him. I was just around. Liza has definitely heard Aura Glow.

As we see, Lil Bruh Gwop just started his journey to the main scene of the music. Follow his instagram to be known about he's latest releases and follow our telegram channel to read more interviews/reviews!

Our telegram channel - https://t.me/zhestmusickanal

Follow Lil Bruh Gwop —

Website:www.linktr.ee/lilbruhgwop

Instagram: www.instagram.com/lilbruhgwop

Facebook: www.facebook.com/lilbruhgwopofficial

Twitter: www.twitter.com/lilbruhgwop

Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/3TDO81KSh…bQS--hu5OoZ4duaQ

SoundCloud: https://m.soundcloud.com/lilbruhgwop

Apple Music: music.apple.com/us/artist/lil-bru…-gwop/14380329741

Amazon Music: music.amazon.com/artists/B07HYD821D/lil-bruh-gwop

YouTube Music: music.youtube.com/channel/UCVOmH_vytd7kJ5o7EJIrPWA

Pandora: pandora.app.link/r1AlGzgoqab

Deezer: www.deezer.com/artist/52120222

#lilbruhgwop #lilskil #rainybear #emopop #lilpeep #keithape #susboy

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shywhitemoose · 2 years

Note

...can I send an ask for the writer AND artist game at the same time? If not, dealer’s choice as to which one you answer! (Also am I the only one whose brain always gets a little scrambled looking at all these emojis and numbers? 🤣)

🤡 and 🦅

5 and 21

Haha sure Soph! And no, you’re not the only one whose brain get scrambled by the emojis and numbers in these games [writer asks and artist asks]. I’ve had to double check about 27 times to make sure I’m answering the right questions for you!

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

Oh man my main characters make me laugh at almost every exchange (well, when they’re not making me cry). I doubt anyone else thought it was as funny as I did, but I *still* laugh every time I think of Obi-Wan’s ill-mannered genitalia thoughts from Chapter 15 of A&E:

He was headed for the floor, but he declined to reach out for assistance because, really, breaking his legs one more time seemed wholly preferable to facing the man he’d just prodded with his ill-mannered genitalia. Gods. Maybe if he were lucky, his head would collide with a bedrail and he’d be knocked unconscious.

I’m also a big fan of their cartoonish, post-handjob scrambling when Mace shows up unannounced at their door.

Anakin grabbed a hand towel as the water shut off and gestured with an emphatic jerk of his head toward Obi-Wan’s room, practically shouting through their bond: GO!

Obi-Wan didn’t need to be told twice. Even with his business properly tucked away and a jar of bacta at the ready to justify his lacking attire, disappearing into his bedroom for the time being did seem to be his most sensible course of action. (Come to think of it, he might elect to live out the rest of his years there because Force help him he’d just ejaculated into his former padawan’s hand and quite frankly he would very much like to do it again and surely self-imposed solitary confinement would be preferable to looking another Jedi Councilor in the eye at any point in the near or distant future while such a secret flounced about inside his head now wouldn’t it?) He could still feel the flush on his cheeks and the cool tickle of perspiration evaporating from his skin, and he suspected he looked about as put together as a drenched loth-cat.

🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

For most things I have an outline. Like A&E was too complicated and plotty to not have one (i’m not smart enough to keep that all in my head!). But I’m trying something a little different with a more recent wip that has no outline, just going to write each chapter as kind of a stand-alone episode in an au i estabish in the first chapter. We’ll see how it goes? Might be fun to have a little more freedom to play as I go :)

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself

Oh gosh, I’d say at least 90% of my digital stuff is anakin/obi-wan/obikin and is intended to ultimately be posted! I’m a traditional artist at heart so all of my physical art is unrelated to fandom and not shared online. That said, being a mom with a full-time job makes that type of art almost not worth it at the moment because when you only have 10-20 minutes at a time to do art, set-up and cleanup make oil painting pretty impractical lol. Digital has really been able to fill that void for me these last couple years!

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways

oh gosh, SO MANY! I’m a huge fan of cartoony styles, but I’m terrible at it. And I LOVE more painterly styles of art (02png’s work, for example), but I’m just kind of incapable of it - I try but it just looks like a lazy mess when I do it - I can’t seem to get a good likeness of what i’m going for unless I render more details, haha.

Thank you so much for the ask! 🤎🤎🤎

#ask game

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andallthatmishigas · 2 years

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Thanks so much for following me!

Can’t wait to read your all your fic once I get moved to my new (to me anyway) house and things settle down a bit in (hopefully) the next month or so.

I’m especially looking forward to reading your Jopper fic and your Ellie x Alan fic, but also Downton Abbey/Cora x Robert fic eventually once I (hopefully) do a rewatch!

You are truly a gift to any fandom you’re in with all the writing you do and we’re lucky to have you in all of these wonderful fandoms!

Like I wish I could write even half as much as you do, but alas, I’m constantly plagued with procrastination and fear.

If you don’t mind me asking, how do you overcome that procrastination and fear as a fic writer?

Well see this is why I had to follow, we have all the best ships and fandoms in common!

Thank you so much for such lovely words oh my goodness. I’d love to hear your thoughts when/if you do read any of my stories, but GOOD LUCK WITH THE MOVE! I hate moving and it’s so stressful but I’m sure it’ll be so worth it to be in your new space.

And in answer to your question, I will be honest and say that I don’t really feel a lot of procrastination and fear about my writing? And that’s for a couple reasons.

First, I started writing fic back in 2011 because I had an idea in my head that just wouldn’t leave me alone. And that is still the case. I write because I have stories to tell. And they are stories I want out in the world mostly for me to be able to go back and read but also sometimes for my friends or for a fandom challenge or whatever. I write because I want to, because I have a story I want to tell.

Second, when I first started posting, it was on ffn and that’s it. I didn’t know anyone in any fandom, I wasn’t in any fandom spaces, I wasn’t (yet) on tumblr. So there’s no fear in putting something out in the world when you don’t know if anyone will see it, and if they do, they can’t really tie it to you. The people who read my early Harry Potter fics were my roommate and total strangers. Their opinions on my work had no bearing on me personally. They don’t know me and can’t find me and therefore I had no concerns about readers at that point.

Third, because of how I started writing and because my path has always been writing because I want to tell my stories, there isn’t much concern with procrastination for me. I don’t procrastinate things I want to do. If I’m tired or not in the mood, I work on another story or I just don’t write that night. It’s my hobby for me, and when it stops being for me, it stops being a good outlet for my creativity.

And I will be honest, I do get really disheartened sometimes when engagement dips because while these are my stories I want to tell, the interaction with readers and friends really has become one of the most important parts. Like I’ve got a story I’ve been working on for more than a year and I just don’t update it often because no one is reading and reviewing/commenting. And I’m gonna finish it and I do love working on it, but it’s hard to be motivated when it’s really just for me.

But it doesn’t stop me from writing! The only time I’ve ever abandoned a story is when I didn’t want to work on it anymore. The only stories I’ve ever written were ones that I wanted to write. This is a hobby for YOU and that’s the most important thing. If YOU like what you’ve written, you’re golden. Looking for the external validation from others is only ever going to cause heartache. And I’m fully guilty of it. The serotonin shot from a comment or review? Out of this world. But that cannot be why you write. That will only burn you in the end.

Writing should be fun. Fandom should be fun. And more often than not (especially in these fandoms that you and I seem to share), people are extremely kind. No one is going to be mean to you for writing something. Everyone is always excited for more content. So please don’t be afraid. Please have fun.

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namuneulbo · 3 months

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week one hundred and twenty two

week started off good with a successful job interview. i can't believe i got so lucky with finding a job. it was definitely worth spending an entire day on applying to like 50+ jobs. it's a receptionist job at a hotel quite nearby which is nice. it looks so fancy and the people there seem nice! it's an extra job so it's even less hours than part-time but honestly, that suits me really well. from my experiences from part-time they always end up giving me more hours than i can take and i end up feeling like shit. i am quite scared of being exposed to german and dutch though because i might've added those to my resume although i definitely only knows the basics, especially of dutch. i've been grinding duolingo to get my german back to the level it was a few years ago but it's still a long way to go.

on thursday i went out with l and his friends, more specifically, ONE of his friends and their friends. it was nice but the vibe was OFF. he's recently been replying SO DRYLY and now it was even happening in real life. it actually got me feeling so shit i ended up texting him about it afterwards and asking if everything was okay to which he responded "i'm just really busy rn," WHICH IS FAIR but i don't know, you don't keep your headphones on when i'm talking to you because you're busy... like i get not being able to meet as much but being busy doesn't equal acting like that when we meet up.

at least his friend was really nice!

on friday i queued all day with m and two other swedish-speaking finns that she apparently knew and, oh my god, the world is so tiny because one of them knew a lot of people i went to high school with.

we were queueing for the 1975!!!!!!!!!!!!! i actually didn't feel like it took too long. we would've gotten barricade if they didn't let the other queue in before us and i'm still so pissed about that because WHY ARE THERE PEOPLE WITH NUMBERS ABOVE 100 IN FRONT OF ME WHEN I WAS ONE OF THE FIRST 15 PEOPLE IN THE FUCKING QUEUE?!?!

at least they were good live. they played so many of my favorites, jesus christ 2005 god bless america, a change of heart... i only wish matty would've talked more. he barely said anything :(

i also ended up not getting any merch because the only shirt i wanted was sold out TT

conveniently, on saturday, i had booked an appointment to fill in some ink for my tattoo and i had to get up early and i was not having it!!! literally was more annoyed about having to get up and get ready than the actual travelling and getting the tattoo fixed. i had some time to spare before the appointment so i went by a shop to get a monster and also left the appointment with a kexchoklad that another artist gave to me. what a guy! forgot how good they were too... yum.

the rest of the day i played sims and watched family guy.

now it's sunday and i'm thinking about going for a jog. i would've already been on one by now if it wasn't for the bathroom being occupied for the past hour or so TT to be fair, i also take my fair share of time in there when i'm getting ready.

i haven't gone for a jog in so long since it's been winter and icy and just... not appropriate weather because you will never catch me buying a jacket and specific shoes and shit just for a little jog. i already bought a pair of shoes and workout clothes last year so i can grind during the summer.

sotw: the 1975 - a change of heart

#namuneulbo #diary #tumblr diary #diary blog #online diary

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drewoclock · 4 months

Text

I Considered Giving Up On My Dreams

Originally published September 26th, 2018

This doesn’t happen with everyone, but some people are lucky enough to know exactly what they want to do with their lives from the very beginning. I was one of those lucky people--maybe too lucky, because there was a lot I wanted to do. It’s always fallen under the umbrella of “creating your own entertainment” but I’ve wanted to be a painter, an actor, a songwriter, a filmmaker, a writer... I’ve wanted the opportunity to live my life making all of these wonderful things. Growing up, I devoted so much of my free time to pumping out artwork like this, always daydreaming of a time where I would be so good at it that people couldn’t look away. Growing up to be an artist, an entertainer, a creator, was never something I ever questioned. That is, until last night.

While having dreams is one thing, making them happen is another. Over the years I’ve definitely thought about this; how hard it’s going to be, what my odds are, how much luck I’ll have to have. I think most careers have their growing pains but with the one I was pursuing, you really start a lot lower. The path to working your way up is long, difficult, and not necessarily happy. Other people might not mind their first job in their field but for me, it’s more or less grunt work. And I famously joked about this for a while, saying how most people had a nice incline where they went from high school to college to getting a job in their field to getting an even better job in their field, etc. Whereas for me, after college, my incline dropped right to the bottom again, and I knew my journey up would be much steeper. I was very aware of this, and it didn’t really phase me. Because I kept daydreaming about my dream career, and what I had to do to get it just seemed worth it to me.

Recently, I took a very big step toward making my dream career happen. I went through the very frustrating process of looking for an apartment in New York City and I moved. I had tried finding the work I needed where I was at previously but, that wasn’t going to work and I knew it. I had to move to somewhere with more opportunity, and I did. And I liked the idea of living in New York City. In a very shallow kind of way, New York City seemed like a place you lived if you were particularly important. I wanted to feel particularly important. I thought I was ready. I--definitely wasn’t.

For one, I’m a lot more isolated here. I knew that I couldn’t live with my family forever in their house with many rooms and that I’d have to transfer to a scrappy apartment. But being mostly confined to one room is vaguely maddening. It has just about everything I need but it’s starting to make me feel like I’m caged. It also makes filmmaking in particular feel like more of a challenge. I hadn’t realized exactly how much I depended on using my parents’ house as something of a studio, being able to film things in many different rooms. Now if I want to do that, I have to make a three hour drive. There aren’t many spaces to film here.

And even if I tried filming here, privacy is a huge issue. These walls are thin, and I couldn’t even fart without everyone in the apartment hearing it. Every conversation that’s had in the apartment is essentially a conversation you’re sharing with everyone else in the apartment. I--really, really don’t like that. I hate the idea that I couldn’t even have a bad day and cry without people hearing it. And maybe it’d be a little more tolerable if I were living with friends, but that dramatically didn’t pan out and I’m here living with three strangers that I more or less don’t really interact with. It’s very uncomfortable.

And it’s also very lonely. Another thing I knew is that you can’t make a big move like this without leaving your family and friends behind. I had a taste of this in college. But in college, it never felt permanent exactly. Now, it does. I miss being able to just text my friends if I was bored and spontaneously hang out. I miss just being able to know I could see them with a ten minute drive. And I had not considered how comforting it was knowing that my family was around in the place I was living, and how nice it was just being able to talk to them. It’s not something I thought of as a kid; how warm and loved you feel being a part of a family. And while I’ll always be in the family--I’m not with it anymore. I’m alone.

And there are things about New York City itself that aren’t too nice. Yes, there’s more to do here and things are bigger. But I like having a car, and dealing with alternate side parking down here is nightmarish. And I barely get to use the car. Public transit is usually the best option for getting places since parking is so horrendous. I miss just the concept of driving a car and being in my own little space. Public transit means you don’t have to worry about driving, but driving was never something I worried about. Also, the gym’s more crowded and I don’t like it.

And on top of all of that, I don’t even have a job yet--which is awful! I’m basically broke. I was trying to apply for jobs even remotely related to my field but I guess I underestimated the competition. I thought waving around a degree would be the one thing about college that was genuinely useful but apparently it really isn’t. Now I’m going to need to find some temp job in order to make ends meet. And yes, some temp job is going to be a lot better than being unemployed. But some temp job is not what I moved to the city for.

And that is actually the biggest problem of all: What I moved down to the city for. I moved down here to start at the very bottom. Do grunt work in my field and claw my way up. I knew that’s what I had to do. I had joked about it. I had my eye on the future. But now, my eyes are also on the present. And the idea of doing this work--makes me really, really unhappy. Yes, after many years it’ll maybe finally pay off. But short-term happiness is valuable too, and something that up until now has been fairly secure for me. Now, I’m looking at the path to following my dreams and for the first time, I’m seeing how miserable it’s going to be.

And for the first time, I’m starting to feel how unfair it is that other people don’t have to be as miserable because they have different dreams. One of my friends is already married and more or less has his dream job while living in a nice apartment, with a move into a nice house pending. I can’t even fathom the kind of happiness he must be feeling. Another one of my friends just got engaged and is working a job he’s very comfortable with, while another one just got a job in a field he really likes. One of my friends just bought a house because they make a ton of money in their field. I have a cousin who’s younger than me and already doing so much better than I am living in the city. And it’s not fair. It’s not fair that I don’t get to be that happy.

So I considered giving up on my dreams. Finding some other career path I could take that wouldn’t be as brutal. Moving away from New York City to a place where I can get an apartment with some privacy. Being able to drive again. I still wouldn’t be living with my family. I might still live away from my friends. But I’d be more comfortable. I’d be happier. And I’d still work on my art projects on the side. I’d make them public. Maybe if I’m lucky, I could start my career that way. Just by being noticed and not by having to work my way all the way up. A lot of people don’t follow their biggest, loftiest dreams, but they’re still very happy with what they have.

But I’ve had the dreams I’ve had for my whole life. These dreams are a part of me. And even if I stop pursuing them, I’ll never stop daydreaming about them. I’ll never stop wanting them to come true. And it’ll make me sad, knowing that I traded them away. The trade would be more than reasonable. I’d get a lot more comfort by giving up on my dreams. But--they’re my dreams. They aren’t going away.

And for the first time, I started to feel cursed for having the dreams that I had. If I had wanted to be a restaurant owner or a barber or a data analyst or something, I wouldn’t be in this situation. I’d be happier. I wouldn’t have to decide between giving up on my dreams, or pursuing my dreams and being miserable while doing it. Because I want to be an artist, an entertainer, a creator, I’m doomed to this unsatisfying existence for however long it winds up taking for things to pay off. And they may never pay off.

So in a way, everything stayed the same after thinking all of these things last night. I still live in New York City. I still need to get a temp job as soon as possible. And I’m still going to pursue my dreams. I feel like I have to. It’s not often that my heart tells me things, but my heart is telling me that this is what I need to do. But what has changed is my awareness of exactly what I’m in for. I had been able to ignore it before because it wasn’t staring me in the face. But now--this is going to be my life. I’m going to be doing grunt work while most of the people I know are standing above me, feeling a lot happier. It’s maybe one of the most unfair things that’s happened to me. I hate it, and daydreaming about the future can’t make me stop hating it.

I’m trying to find a way to end this on a positive note. It’s stumping me because I’m very, very sad right now. It’s overwhelming how bad everything is, and there are constant reminders of it every day. I’ve been sitting here for a long time trying to figure out a way I can end this that’s happier. I had a thought of a life that might work out a little better for me. Where I moved back to where I came from. I know a lot of people from that area that have found the kind of grunt work I’m looking for down here. If I looked even harder, I bet I could find it for myself. I could work my way up and develop the skills I need to look appealing to the big jobs I really want. I could keep putting my art projects out there and try to get them noticed. And maybe I could get offers for big gigs in places like NYC or LA. But gigs would come and go, and I could always come back in between them. To a place where I have my own private apartment. Where I can drive a car. Where I get to visit my family that I love to pieces often. Where I get to be close to my best friends. Maybe there’s a way, to have both kinds of happiness.

It’s hard to know how things will play out. But maybe it’s not that thought of a happier life back where I was that’s the positive note to end on. Maybe the real positive note to end on is knowing just how much I care about my own happiness. That I care so much about giving myself the happiest future possible that I’m willing to sit here until I figure out how to end this on a happy note.

Life isn’t too happy right now. Not at all. But at least I know that I’ll always be striving to make it happy.

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cyarskaren52 · 6 months

Text

It’s getting hot in here . These tv shows had scenes that had our hearts racing

https://tvline.com/lists/sexiest-tv-scenes-2023-outlander-riverdale/

2023 in Review: The 25 Sexiest Scenes

Team TVLineDecember 7, 2023 7:30 am

Grab a cold glass of water and a paper fan, because TVLine’s list of the sexiest TV moments of 2023 is likely to raise your body temperature.

Naturally, there are plenty of kisses and love scenes in the below roundup, including passionate smooches from Abbott Elementary, The Summer I Turned Pretty and Station 19. And of course, the hot hookups on Outlander, Superman & Lois and The Morning Show also got our pulses racing.

But sexy times in bed (or against a wall) are not required in order to fog up screens. Case in point: Magnum P.I.’s Baywatch-esque strut, Law & Order: Organized Crime’s oddly intimate shootout and a Daisy Jones & the Six serenade all turned up the heat without ever hitting the sheets. And more than one of our selections made the cut with simply a well-delivered sexy line of dialogue.

Fun fact: Making their second appearance in a row on this list are Grey’s Anatomy, Station 19, Nancy Drew, Power Book IV: Force and Jonathan Bailey (but with a different series this year!).

So turn up the air conditioning and review TVLine’s picks for 2023’s sexiest scenes (complete with Safe For Work screenshots), then hit the comments to share your additions!

Photo : Courtesy of Paramount+

Alex and Spencer spent so much of the Paramount+ drama’s first season in extreme peril (the elephant, the capsized boat, etc.), we couldn’t blame them for wanting to take a pants-optional break by the seaside. And when we had a front-row seat to their, as she called it, “ravaging”? So much the better! (Season 1, Episode 4)

Photo : Hulu screenshot

Gregory and Janine’s long-awaited first kiss in a beautifully botanical living class room was worth the wait. And judging by the delicious way Janine tugged on Gregory’s neck badge, pulling him back in for another steamy lip-lock, we weren’t the only ones who didn’t want the moment to end. (Season 2, Episode 16)

Photo : The CW screenshot

We already figured Spencer and Olivia would get back together by season’s end, but the white-hot chemistry on display during this fashion show dance routine mercifully accelerated their reconciliation. No kisses were shared during the performance, but the looks on Spencer and Olivia’s faces as they pressed their bodies together told us everything we needed to know about their lingering feelings — and Spencer’s poor girlfriend, Alicia, could see it from the audience, too. (Season 5, Episode 18)

Photo : Peacock screenshot

It was a difficult season for Severide and Stella, what with him taking on an arson investigation training gig that took him away for months. And even before that, the couple experienced some tensions on the job that tested their marriage. Thankfully, they were able to work past their issues in sexy fashion, with Stella greeting her hubby dressed in the only thing she wants to bring home from work: his lucky coat. (Season 11, Episode 12)

Photo : YouTube screenshot

We’re a sucker for an Out of Sight-esque sex scene/montage (see: our 2019 Sexiest Scenes pick Good Trouble), so the seductive slices of Charlie and Emma’s first night together — their passionate kiss, the casual conversation in the bath and in bed, the late-night pool swim — had us all riled up. It’s a shame that ABC snuffed the sexy chemistry between the con man and the CIA agent. (Season 1, Episode 1)

Photo : Prime Video screenshot

Sure, sparks flew between Billy and Daisy when they recorded their first duet, “Look at Us Now (Honeycomb).” But it was the silent glances (particularly Sam Claflin’s smoldering stare) and gentle knee touch as Daisy sang an acoustic version of “It Was Always You” to the man who was no doubt the inspiration behind the song that had us holding our breath with anticipation. (Season 1, Episode 9)

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot

We’re gonna sound like poor, unstable Alex here, but what made her first tryst with married man Dan so damn titillating wasn’t the sex itself but the strong sense that there was more going on than two bodies mashing together. The two of them had connected, really connected, and couldn’t resist the temptation to see if their newfound understanding of one another translated to the bedroom. Spoiler alert: It did. (Season 1, Episode 2)

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot

For a series with plenty of sex, the hottest moment in the Showtime drama wasn’t about action, but a line of dialogue, suggestively delivered by Jonathan Bailey’s Tim as he tried to convince his lover Hawk (Matt Bomer) to take him to a political soirée: “I’m your boy, right? And your boy wants to go to the party.” (Season 1, Episode 1)

Photo : ABC screenshot

After a full season of Lucas pining for Simone, she finally ditched the fiancé who was more like an anchor around her neck than a stethoscope — and at the altar, no less — to use an on-call room for its intended purpose: tenderly surrendering to passion with the fellow resident who, unlike Trey, could say with all sincerity, “I see you, and I love every single thing I see.” (Season 19, Episode 19)

Photo : Courtesy of HBO

“Go take a shower, Bill.” And with just five words — and one unexpectedly romantic first kiss — the sweet, sad, post-apocalyptic and deeply intimate ballad of Frank and Bill began. (Season 1, Episode 3)

Law & Order: Organized Crime

Photo : Courtesy of NBC

Should it have been sexy when Capt. Benson and her former partner, Det. Stabler, came under fire in a suburban diner and he was rendered blind by their assailant’s teargas? Absolutely not. But was it sexy when, in the heat of the moment, an injured Liv grabbed El’s hand and guided it so he could shoot the bad guy, even though he couldn’t see him? Yep. Yep, it was. (Season 3, Episode 22)

Photo : Courtesy of NBC

The CBS castoff’s first season on NBC was touted as “sexier,” and that became quite apparent in the second episode, when a slow-motion sequence languorously surveyed the tanned and toned physiques of “Jane” and “Robbie,” Juliet and Thomas’ undercover lifeguard personae. File this under: “bae-watch.” (Season 5, Episode 2)

Photo : Apple TV+ screenshot

Alex’s flirty banter with her interview subject/future boss was so full of sparks, no one was shocked it turned into a beautifully shot, clothes-free party at his Hamptons estate. File this one under: So Wrong It’s… Still Pretty Horrible But Nonetheless Hot. (Season 3, Episode 6)

Photo : Max screenshot

The sexual tension between Nancy Drew’s titular sleuth and the star-crossed love of her life has always been off the charts (literally barometer-breaking!), but it was never hotter than when she painted his body with the sigil they hoped would break the curse keeping them apart. From the moment Nancy looks Ace in the eyes and tells him to take off his shirt, the heat is on. She explores him with her eyes before exploring him with her brush, knowing that the pleasure of her touch is the only thing getting him through the pain. This moment isn’t just hot, it’s also a damn good argument to fund the arts. (Season 4, Episode 3)

Photo : Netflix screenshot

Most of these moments involve the removal of clothes (and we’re not complaining), but Devi and Ben’s sexiest moment — by far — took place the morning after they made love, when he eagerly pulled up a YouTube tutorial to help her figure out how to get back into her sari. (Season 4, Episode 10)

Photo : Courtesy of Starz

Forget, for a moment, that the whole thrust (sorry) of this scene stems from Roger’s jealousy that Brianna is getting platonically friendly with a male co-worker. And pay no mind to the fact that Mr. and Mrs. MacKenzie go at it on an aggressively floral, focus-pulling upholstered fold-out couch. Despite both of those considerations, this interlude — set to Phil Collins’ “In the Air Tonight” — is still the most charged intimate moment in the Starz drama’s recent history. (Season 7, Episode 7)

Photo : Courtesy of Starz

Mireya invited Tommy to share a private dance with her with the sole intent of getting to their first kiss, a romantic moment that wound up getting interrupted when he was called away. But the way Tommy could barely peel himself away from her! That kiss after he grabbed his coat! Hot stuff, all of it. (Season 2, Episode 4)

Photo : Netflix screenshot

We’re surprised the room didn’t immediately engulf in flames given George and Charlotte’s heated gazes just before… you know. And as hot and heavy as their first official night together was, George’s guttural, “I’m very good with buttons,” already had our pulses racing. (Season 1, Episode 2)

Photo : The CW screenshots

Archie and Betty were stuck in the very chaste 1950s in the final season, but their teenage hormones were still raging, so the next-door neighbors decided to learn more about their bodies by taking off their clothes for each other in their bedroom windows. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife as Betty revealed a lacy black corset under her shirt and Archie eagerly stripped down to his underwear. They never even touched each other in the scene — and their parents rudely interrupted them just when it was getting good — but we could still feel the sizzling chemistry between them even seven decades later. (Season 7, Episode 6)

Photo : Paramount+ screenshots

A shopping spree ironically got besties Cruz and Aaliyah thinking about UNdressing one another, when, alone in a fitting room, Aaliyah told Cruz that the spontaneous kiss they’d shared the day before was “all I think about.” Then, with a shy, quiet, “Come here…,” Aaliyah invited Cruz over for a hint of what was to come, during their torrid first romp. (Season 1, Episode 7)

Photo : ABC screenshot

We’d almost begun to think we’d been imagining the simmering attraction between would-be mayor Travis and campaign manager Eli when, finally, after a particularly rousing day on the trail, they hurled themselves at one another, tore off their clothes and, um, secured the swing vote. Better luck next time, Andy. (Season 6, Episode 14)

The Summer I Turned Pretty

Photo : Prime Video screenshot

Look away, Conrad/Belly ‘shippers! For our money, it was Belly and Jeremiah who brought the best heat in Season 2, by way of their carside makeout session after confirming they still had real feelings for each other. The kissing, of course, was intense, but it was the breathless way Jeremiah said, “Yes, I still…” that made this scene endlessly rewatchable. (Season 2, Episode 7)

Photo : Max screenshot

John Henry and Lana’s heated, shirt-ripping romp definitely steamed up Smallville. Even better was the expert flirting that took place beforehand, especially Lana telling John Henry that she would just have to make him wish he wasn’t moving to Metropolis. After that, he’d have to be a fool to let her go! (Season 3, Episode 13)

Photo : Apple TV+ screenshot

It wasn’t just a canal into which Rebecca fell in the polarizing “Sunflower,” it was love. After some enchanted evening spent on a handsome Dutchman’s houseboat, she was assured by her rescuer that they hadn’t. The implication was that no, they hadn’t had sex. But had they done something far more magical? “Oh yes, we did,” he said to himself. In her heart of hearts, she knew it, too. (Season 3, Episode 6)

Photo : Paramount+ screenshot

Imagine for a moment that an Abercrombie & Fitch catalogue comes to life, and all of the models start asking knowing questions about about one another’s sexual preferences while exchanging heated, jealous glances. Now imagine that one of them might be a werewolf! Does the entire scene feel a bit like the lead-in to a cheap porno? Of course it does. But let’s not pretend like that’s a bad thing.

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#love scene #tv shows #year in review

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