#but I've actually heard pretty good things about ECT

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not having a job despite having time for it?

🍏🥝🍏🥝 <- to keep track of this when it posts,

My family really loves talking about me(20) when they think I'm not listening. I've heard them on multiple occasions say that I need a job and that I should just start working part-time while I'm going to college. The issue with that is that while other people can do both pretty decently, I dont feel like I'm capable of doing both part time and college without one of them suffering a lot because of the other.

My family is pretty financially stable, and the fees I owe never go over 900 dollars and sometimes I even make my own money off of commissions to help pay for things. I actually did have an actual job during my classes for a while filing things and remote video editing work (for the same job) but one of my family members worked with me there as my boss and I decided to quit after they decided to ask if my mom would've rather died than had me after I told him she called trans people abominations (I am trans, I'm only out to that family member and my brother). I haven't found a consistent thing to do to earn money since but I've been trying really hard to advertise my commissions since then.

The part where I feel really guilty though is the fact that I've been going to a community college for almost 3 years now (with my family supporting me money wise) and know I'm only going to come out with a one year certificate because of how fucked my schedule got in my first year. I didn't meet some prerequisites , and despite the course I wanted being a 2 year degree it was worth almost 80 credits, which felt insane as I went into it. 5 classes a term, some 5 minutes after the other, all based on pouring hours and hours into artsy projects (video, audio, 3d modelling, painting, 2d animation, ect...). I broke down within my third term after I started failing some of my classes. I was still trying for my 2 year degree up until 2023 where I decided that getting a certificate that was similar and getting a job after would probably be better for me at this point rather than spending ANOTHER 2 years struggling OR straight up giving up and dropping out with nothing.

I'm also home a lot when I'm not in class (I'm only taking 2-3 classes a term now). I do little things sometimes like take out the trash and pull dishes from out the washer and so on but it's all only when no one is home because the place where things generally need to be cleaned up is all in our very small kitchen AND the fact that I'm scared of them poking fun at me for "finally doing something for once" because it makes me feel terrible when they do. I end up chilling out in my room completing work and desperately finding work arounds for projects to only ever really need done in my room or on campus- generally anywhere that's not going to worry my grandma too much.

I've told my family that their teasing doesn't make me feel good but it just gets responded with "that's just how we show love!" when I know it doesn't have to be that way! My boyfriend teases me pretty often but the difference is that he actually listens to me when I tell him something he said didn't feel very good to me and we talk it through, and then he doesn't make that joke again or i feel better after knowing the context of it!!! A lot of my family members will bicker until another one ends up crying and it's horrible to watch how petty and bitter everyone can be.

Don't really know what else to write, AITA guys? I know I could be doing a lot more around the house instead of working but I'm scared of being touched (my aunt randomly spanked me as hard as she could one time last year) and scared of more mean comments being thrown my way. I already have a plan to leave this home and have been open about it to them, but I don't want to rush it if I don't have to and want to spend a few years saving money up so that I'm not in a horrible situation if things go awry.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[vicky82gargoylesfan]

My Thoughts on X-Men 97 Episode 5 Remember It

Wow this was a fucking awesome episode, It was so Intense, shocking and emotional and I still haven't gotten over it, even watching it a few times hasn't helped but I do love it. I'm certainly going to remember this episode for a very, very long time.

I was actually planning to watch it on my break at work, but I forgot my iPad and as I didn't want to look at spoilers, I just watch tv and didn't even look on my phone. It was good thing I did watch it when I got home, otherwise I wouldn't been able to concentrate.

Spoilers

I didn't realise how dark this show was going to become, it took me by surprise. I thought the matureness would be a bit less than Young Justice season 3 and 4, I was totally wrong.

I knew that there were multiple massacre and genocide events in the comics. Watching it on TV, especially an animated show, hits you differently than reading it in comics and it mirrors real life tragic events, it was very shocking.

It was such a brilliant well written episode, it delivered some powerful dialogue. The shift in tone worked brilliantly.

Loved the animation, some of it was breath-taking.

The voice acting was brilliant, A.J. LoCascio, Lenor Zann and Matthew Waterson were amazing. Lenor Zann deserves an award.

The score was breath-taking. I loved the Ace of Base song, Happy Nation, it's now stuck in my head. I never even heard this song before, the only 2 songs I know from Ace of Base is, I Saw the Sign and All That She Wants. I've now downloaded this song.

When I rewatch this episode, it makes me sad seeing all these mutants being so happy and free, not knowing about to turn tragic later.

It was great seeing Nightcrawler again, I also liked seeing cameo's of other mutants. Dazzler, Bomb Bomb, Arc Angel, Marrow, Multiple Man ect, (sorry I'm not clear on other mutant names).

So on the council, is Emma Frost, Shaw, Moria, Banshee, Calisto and Madelyne. I just love Emma's bitchy remarks throughout the episode.

Jean kissing Wolverine didn't feel awkward to me, as it does happen in the comics, so I'm not going to make a big deal about it.

I do hope that Jean and Cyclops do sort there issues out, they are my favourite couple. Scott and Maddy's psychic rapport moment was definitely a reference to Scott and Emma's psychic affair in the comics.

I love Beast's reaction, when Scott and Jean were arguing.

I do love that Scott was concerned for Jean when she had that psychic attack.

I like the flashback, how Rogue met Magneto. Luckily it was confirmed, she met him when she was in her 20s.

I do feel for Rogue and can understand what's she's going through, she wants skin to skin contact but can't do that with Gambit.

I do feel sorry for Gambit but he was mature and respected Rogue's decision to be with Magneto.

I didn't notice The Watcher, on the first watch.

I know a lot of people think that Val Cooper is Mystique but unless Wolverine lost his sense of smell in the 1st two episodes, it can't be her.

Very powerful lines:-

Valerie Cooper "Most other nations don't allow a terrorist become their leader" Magneto "Yet so many allow their leaders to be terrorists"

I thought Rogue was really pretty in that dress.

Magneto and Rogue steamy dance and kiss did feel awkward at first but I got used to it when I watched the episode multiple times.

Rogue realises she loves Gambit and rejects Magneto and she understands what Gambit said to her that 'Some things are deeper than skin'

Ok this is the moment that I knew something bad was going to happen (I didn't notice the Watcher). Madelyne had her psychic attack causing her nose to bleed (and we see Jean's nose was bleeding too). Maddy's vision in the 1st episode was actually foreshadowing this horrific event.

I thought the music being slowed down was a nice touch and felt very haunting.

Great to see Cable again and voiced by Chris Potter, Gambit's voice actor from the original show.

When he said 'not again' does this mean this wasn't the 1st time he's tried to warn everyone about the upcoming attack.

When Madelyne realised Cable is her son and Cable disappears back to the future, saying he was sorry, that was pretty heart-breaking.

Wow that 1st attack, that blast, poor Maddy, she didn't stand a chance.

That blast caused Rogue and Magneto to be thrown quite far out

I just love the animation and sounds when Rogue was regaining consciousness.

I was bit surprised by the amount of blood and cuts on Rogue. Magneto didn't have any injuries at all, until later.

Rogue's and Magneto's reactions was perfect, they were shocked and confused at what was going on, they just stood there watching, you can even here the fear in Rogue's voice when she sees Banshee being vapourised. Kurt had to risk his life to save them.

OMG!! I actually thought Kurt had died, I was relieved that when Gambit checked his pulse, he was still alive.

Rogue, Gambit and Magneto, were absolutely brilliant, Gambit and Magnet were both badass.

When Rogue and Gambit went to save the Morlocks, the score gave me goosebumps. Seeing them side by side was great.

Magneto starts having these flashbacks of death and destruction, including a flashback of the concentration camp, he then goes on a rampage and attacks the Wild Sentinel using a train as a whip.

Gambit saving the Morlocks, was obviously a reference to the Morlock Massacre when he betrayed them but this time he saved them. The music made me think, everything was going to be ok but it was all false hope.

When the wild sentinel detected a omega threat mutant, was that at Leech?

I just love that Magneto protected Gambit and Rogue, used metal debris to cover them.

I just love the way Rogue and Magneto were looking at each other.

Magneto telling Leech 'don't be afraid' in German, was gut wrenching.

I was in shock when Magneto and the Morlocks were vapourised. But I do have a sliver of hope that they might have survived.

Then I see Rogue that I've never seen before, there is no score, just hear a heartbeat.

She's in tears, full of rage and fury and she wants revenge but she not thinking straight and goes she to attack the Wild Sentinel.

Gambit knows she won't make it and has to save her, he throws his charged up bike into her, to get her out of the way of the Wild Sentinel blast.

The Wild sentinel then targets mutants at the Gardens and Gambit has to save them, so he goes after the wild sentinel but then he's impaled and I almost scream, I was in shock.

What I love about Gambit that he still has his sence of humour and he uses his power to blow up the Wild Sentinel, saving the suvivivors.

Then we cut back to the Mansion with the others watching the events on the news, all in shock.

Then back in Genosha, Rogue is crying and cradling Gambit in her arms, then it fades to black and we hear Rogue say 'I, I can't feel you'. I was in tears.

Even the end credit score was very sombre

What was even more sadder, is that Rogue never got to tell Gambit, she chose him over Magneto.

I love Rogue, she's one of my favourite female characters (next to Jean) so seeing her like this was heart braking. I hope she will be ok, I'm going to be really worried about her.

I know that a lot Marvel characters don't stay dead, so I do have some hope that Gambit and Magneto ect will be alive by the end of the season, keeping my fingers crossed.

So the death list is Maddy, Banshee, Marrow, Shaw, Moira, Dazzler, Callisto, Gambit and possible Magneto and the other Morlocks. I assume Emma survives using her diamond form.

I do have a feeling that Bastion is responsible for the genocide on Genosha.

This was only the 5th episode!!! and apparently just warm up, something even worse is going to happen in the last 3 episodes. What could be worse than a genocide on Genosh and major character deaths??????

The next episode, Lifedeath part 2 won't be much of breather episode either, apparently it's going to be scary and creepy.

I have to say this episode has dethroned The Red Wedding.

#x men #x men 97

[leaffiii]

*shows up from the sewers like alligator, with headcanons and 1 drabble in teeth* hello :)

I like to think that Pharaoh man is the old man of this team.

Maybe he was fighting along with other robots in Hard war somewhere far away, was able to survive and run away from government long enough to be considered a legent, waiting for the right moment to rejoin in this lost war again.

Maybe he heard about Silicon city's many attends from other robots to overthrow humans ones again but without any luck and decided to lend his hand there. And so he travels and eventually arrives and joins your terrorist club. Maybe he even seems badass first time we get to his introduction. A legend thought to be long gone, a experienced warrior that can survive in extreme situations, a hard war veteran and ect.

And then hes like "how do you do fellow kids" and the badass points that he has? Long gone.

Expect the "in my time-" and "I've seen better" routine. And don't even try to ask about his past, because you just will be stuck in unskipable cutscene of him telling you all about it, like at least 3 hours, bare minimum. Usually the victim of this "cutscene" is Hard man, because he's to slow to make a getaway in time before Pharaoh starts telling story and to nice to actually walk out if he started it.

Also i just think that solar shot (or whatever Pharaoh uses) is actually one of few things that beats Hard mans defense. Like, dude can be dence as much as he wants but can he stand the plazma with a heat that feels like surface of the sun?

Imagine Snake asking Pharaoh about Hard war, and thinking that now that he has a literal veteran he won't need to steal documents about that ever again and walking out of that same room 12 hours later and be like: i wish that i was stealing documents and failed rather than be stuck in a room with him like this ever again.

Pharaoh is pretty affectionate toward Metal man but in a "grandfather that tells u suck after barely telling that he's proud of you" kinda way. Like "man, Metal you actually not half bad with repair stuff, i dont feel anything wrong with my arm animore. But i still had better, so you have room to improve."

Also Pharaoh sometimes uses slangs in hes speeches, so it leads to situations like this:

Hope you recovered from whatever you had and that you have a great day! Bye *goes back into sewers*

Reaches out of my trashcan and munches on this like a raccoon eating grapes (Had a busy day lol but FINALLY got on my laptop to reply)

Oh my GOD this is such a treat, actually!! I've been having a bit of trouble characterizing him and this is PERFECT for him. Pharaoh being a veteran is such a good idea! It also officially marks him as the oldest of the group. I'm still deciding on what his abilities will be specifically, since I'm trying not to have too much overlap between them lol. Poor Hard Man though, big man has to deal with so much lol

I do imagine Pharaoh and Skull being from the same creator (Some FC version of Dr. Cossack) BUT keep in mind I haven't touched the comics at all, aside from skimming the articles on the Wiki. This is already an AU of sorts anyways, which I'll elaborate on eventually. That being said I think Toad should also have come from the same creator for shits and giggles lmao THAT DOES REMIND ME i gotta finish Pharaoh's ref, hes been legless for so long oops (and I gotta do one for Metal and the last two guys. whoops.) I recovered from my cold a bit ago, I'm doing well now!

#other people's art #other's headcanons #croc pop #leafy speaks #mega man #mmfc #mega man fully charged #megaman #mmfc au #fc!pharaoh man #fc!metal man

[bahamutgames]

SAGE 2023 Postin' PART 2!!!

Hello! I'm back again! It's the weekend so I figured... why not? Why shouldn't I play more SAGE demos? So that's exactly what I did. Play lots of SAGE demos until 2 AM like a normal person. Here's what I played today that YOU should check out!!

Susan Taxpayer - by Punkitt

I've had my eye on this game for a bit now, and was totally blindsided when I randomly found out it was a part of SAGE 2023! I wasn't planning on playing demos today but when I saw this was there, I had to go for round 2. This game is lovely so far! Wonderful art, cute characters, and nice music that I swear to god is using a Rugrats soundfont sometimes? Regardless it's good. It's pretty neat because to me it sort of feels like a fusion between Wario Land and standard Mario fare (probably because it runs in SMBX2 which is neat.) This whole game is already looking great and I love all the office themed stuff and Susan is a little hot I won't lie. Looking forward to seeing this game more in the future!

Bun 'N' Gun - by Sharb

An interesting one I'd never heard of before! This is a game all about a cowboy bunny collecting bats in big open areas! It's all about speed but you also have a grappling ability that lets you swing from walls Spider-Man style as well as a gun that stuns the bats you catch. The best I could probably compare it to is the Knuckles/Rouge stages in SA2 just with a lot more speed focus. It's pretty neat! My only issue is that it can be SUPER dizzying running around super fast while the camera shifts around so quickly, which makes it hard to play. But it looks fantastic and has very catchy music in the few stages I played (didn't beat this one cause it's a little intense lol). With some more work I think this one's gonna be really cool! I think they should also add a radar to let you know when you're close to bats. It has Bunny Customization so 10/10 though.

Cosmogelica - by CyanSorcery

Every time I think I've seen everything you could possibly do in a bullet hell, someone comes along and shows me new ideas I never thought of before! This genre really is just evergreen! Cosmogelica is a delightful Bullet Hell with WONDERFUL graphics, fantastic music, tight controls, and hot furry girls. But don't let that cool you off because the most interesting thing about this one is the gel gimmick. Different stages are covered in gels with different properties (the ones I saw were gels that ignite when shot, gels that stop bullets, gels that damage you upon touching, ect ect) and both you and the enemies have to play around these gels as you go. But you can also use the gels yourself if you have certain weapons! This is SUCH a neat idea that I think has TONS of potential, especially where using the gels as a weapon is concerned. Absolutely gonna have to keep up with this one!

Croaking Around - by Scallybag

This is an interesting one. It opens with an ADORABLE cutscene and a really good story too that genuinely made me chuckle a bit lol. And I really think the gameplay has a lot of potential! But it also has a lot of odd quirks I'm not so sure about. First off, I LOVE that you use your tongue for grappling, and while I think the blue grapples work lovely. The main red (orange? I forgor) ones are super clunky and I think some sort of arrow that shows you the trajectory you'll travel after launching from them would help this game TONS! Also, it has a weird auto walljump feature that bugged me. BUT, it's a super cute game and I also think this one has a lot of potential. The creator makes some amazing Sonic art on twitter too I had to follow them immediately when I went to get their link lmao

Pangolin Cassowary - by Ocotilloisland

I'll admit straight away, I almost had to give up on this one. I could not figure it out for a bit! But I'm SUPER glad I stuck with it cause I actually REALLY loved it once I figured it out. You play as a Cassowary who can kick their Pangolin Pal around like a ball and then fly to wherever they end up. There's no jumping, you HAVE to kick the Pangolin around and trick shot them up walls and such in order to platform through the level. Again, it takes a bit of getting used to but it actually RULES once you figure out how it all works. I'm SUPER interested to see more of this. Cute art style too and for some reason I found the chip crunching noises to be oh so satisfying.

Yark! : A Kobold Adventure - by YarkDev

A GAME ABOUT A LIZARD GIRL??? YES PLEASE YES PLEASE YES PLEASE! This is a stealth game all about stealing stuff as a cute kobold! What more could you ask for? It took me a bit to figure out the controls, so if you try it I really suggest you go with keyboard + mouse and don't bother with a controller. But it's actually a super fun game. I sadly could not find the rod lol but sneaking about the castle, avoiding gaurds, and feeding the treasure chest random treasures was genuinely a blast! I think there's a TON of potential for this game, and I think if the controls can be smoothed out or allow for full custom mapping this game is gonna be sweet! Also, I'll admit, I'm absolutely head over heels for Rhiri SHE IS ADORABLE so 10/10

---

Today's selection were other games from the SAGE 2023 trailer I forgot about until today, as well as additional random picks that caught my eye with cute characters! Also no fan games today but I played so much Sonic Battle Rush yesterday that it makes up for it I think. Like last time I encourage you to play some stuff if anything catches your eye! And also if you submitted anything to the event let me know cause I'd love to see your work!

Now I am drop dead tired and can smell smoke in my brain (kidding) so I think I'm off to bed! Bye-bye!

#2023 #thoughts #sage 2023

[the-girl-with-the-glass-heart]

A luke warm review of the live action monster high movie

I pirated the monster high movie last night so i'm going to review it.

Allow me to start this review off with a few quick notes.

1. I am well aware of the controversies surrounding this movie, the racist director, the colorism, ect. with that being said, i wanna judge this movie based on how it actually is rather than the controversy surrounding it. This does not give anyone the excuse to ignore these issues, i just think these points have been said many many times by people who are much better at explaining this than somebody like me, who is so white i am practically marble.

2. I'm the kinda person who's incredibly forgiving to movies, i like liking things, i go into some of the most garbage movies with positive vibes. I also have garbage taste in everything. Try to take my review with an optimistic grain of salt. I'm also not a professional movie critic so alot of my critiques are shallow and not very detailed.

3. This is all just my opinion, you will most likely feel differently and that's okay, no pressure, i will not force you to like this movie be unique be urself be a monster or whatever. I will have some opinions in this post you are bound to disagree with and that's fine.

THE GOOD

-Something i think is really underrated about this movie that people never talk about is the set design, it actually looks like monster high, like the actual playset. They could of easily made it look like knock off hogwarts or just painted a normal school purple but they actually tried.

-I know everyone was dunking on the clothes and the wigs and the fact they don't look like monsters enough but i actually loved most of the outfits in this movie. Granted i'm not a huge fashionista and i was always in monster high for the stories than tje clothes but i think they did a good job. I mean they're on a tv budget and they had to make multiple outfits for multiple characters. This movie probably already costed alot with the make up, clothes, and VFX already. I specifically really like frankies clothes.

-The music is pretty nice! I mean it's no classic musical theatre or as iconic as steal the show or the fright song... buuut, i think the music is all pretty good. Coming out of the dark and its reprise is especially sweet, the only song i don't really like is the three of us, i just can't get the groove tbh. I also really like how in monster heart komos has christian youth pastor vibes and how in i can trust you they mixed in the snake sounds. Just be me also is very cute but i swear i've heard it that chorus before. I'm glad they got kids who can actually sing tbh.

-I thought the humor was all around very solid! Frankie was pretty funny at times, speaking of which...

-this version of frankie is very sweet and very very autistically coded, i think cici balgot is perfect for this version of frankie ngl, i'd love to he friends with this frankie irl.

-by herself and not compared to the og i think this version of clawdeen is also quite sweet. obviously she is nothing like her og cartoon counterpart but for what she is in this movie i think she's very cute. Also keep in mind i didn't care much for clawdeen in the og anyways, i found her voice really cringe and like i said, i was never a fashionista so i was always more into frankie or draculaura. If i actually loved clawdeen or wasn't basically a sentient sheet of paper i would probably be alot angrier.

-the acting is all around solid, that's all i have to say tbh.

-the opening scene is very cute.

-i also like the ending where they all float.

-i'm just happy the kids all had a fun time filming this, i know that doesn't actually affect the quality of the movie but child stars are hardly ever treated well and they all got alot of hate during the production of this movie.

-i do like the allegory of racial prejudice against biracial people, just judging it by itself it was a cool take on it that i think it was handled actually better than freaky fusion. Freaky fusion was a mess tbh tho so that isnt saying much.

THE BAD

-the climax lasted like 4 minutes, i get its a short movie but COME ON, AT LEAST BUILD UP A LITTLE MORE.

-I don't like deuce and clawdeen being a couple, i wish they were just good friends tbh and just vaugely hinted at it. I do like what they did with their relationship tho.

-Cleos development was weird, i feel like they made her such a weird character in this movie, although it is sweet that she learned to accept that clawdeen loved deuce.

-i don't like this new draculaura, i don't care that she's taiwanese now, she just doesn't seem all that interesting. She's by far the most forgettable ghoul in the trio.

-Lagoona, Ghoulia, abbey, and heath did NOTHING in this movie. I understand time restraints but seriously, why even have em in there if you already have a limited budget and you aren't going to do anything with them. People might be pissed but at least the plot wouldn't be all bloated.

-This is a problem in the og but i think its weird that frankie was presumabley made by humans and made out of humans but she doesn't seem to care about the human stigma. Cleo also doesn't give a shit yet she used to be human. It's weird that a narcissist like cleo wouldn't be at least a little offended.

-Deuce is so so bland in this movie, he's sweet at sometimes but fuuuuck, he is so bland.

-Clawdeens mom is dead, listen i love the dead mom trope and it kinda makes sense for the story but it feels weird. Idk how you would fix it but just... it's weird.

-The writing at times was a real mess and alot of things made no sense. Why would clawdeen lie about her dads name being pierre? That's a way more human name than fuckin apollo. Why did draculaura say she hates sun when she was wearing a hoodie? Just flip up the hood!

-as much as i like the humor in this movie, the PA announcer is annoying, they used her too much.

-the plot twist about the hand lock thing was so dumb, especially because frankie could of opened it from the beggining.

THE I DONT KNOW HOW TO FEEL

-ghoulia talks, on one hand i understand if you wanna give her lines because it would work better for the movie, on the other hand, she didn't do anything in the movie so why change it?

-SPOILER!........... Komos is revealed to be hydes son, cool i guess. I'll miss jackson/holt.

.... that's it.

Overall probably would pirate it again. 4.9/10. Wouldn't even mind if they made a sequel, as long as they change directors. I mean whatever you think about this movie i think we can all agree that no matter what, at least it's better than the bratz movie, the winx saga, power puff girls cw, and jem and the holograms.

#monster high live action #mh #monster high gen 3 #mh gen 3 #mh reboot #monster high reboot #mh live action

[wishful-seeker]

So I don't necessarily talk about my specific condition often because I'm currently undiagnosed which makes things really hard to explain, but my doctor's currently think is complex regional pain syndrome (aka suicide disease 🙃), im just waiting to see a neurologist to officially diagnose it, but thankfully my team is willing to MOSTLY treat me without the diagnosis and have been giving me ketamine infusions.

Now I've been trying for 4 years to find meds that help me enough to make things manageable, and for 2 of these years I've been pretty much bedridden, it's been extremely hard mentally and physically, I basically lost my entire life, my hobbies, school, my job, being able to leave the house, ect. It's rough! And for 4 years I've heard from doctors "I don't feel comfortable treating you" "I can't do anymore" "I'll send you to someone else" over and over and over again, to the point where I really shut down at doctors appointments, I keep my emotions at bay and my face blank as I explain the facts.

Well I saw my stomach doctor recently and he actually made me LAUGH, and he said "You smiled! You never smile at appointments! *turns to my dad* does she usually have a hard time expressing emotion because I've noticed that." I explain that I only act that way at doctors appointments, and why I act that way as a defense mechanism. He understands, and we continue.

After the appointment I tried to ask myself what was different about today, and why i felt comfortable laughing.

It's because the ketamine is actually helping, and not like 2% like most meds, but like 15% EVERY SESSION, which is insane. I spent so long thinking I was stuck like this forever, that my burning nerve pain would be forever, but it's NOT. And that feels really good.

Idk how much relief I can get with this, but I can not hurt a lot until night now and that's really nice. So long as I don't do much at all, but it's something.

#personal #disability #chronic pain #cripple punk #chronically ill

[getsillyyyy]

Redoing this because I don't like my first one

Hello! You can call me pinkz, pinky, or Benny! My favorite activities are drawing, listening to music, roleplaying, and staring at my wall(/j)

I absolutely LOVE talking about my ocs because they are just so silly! My favorite ocs right ATM probably has to be Randy and or noodles!

I love when people info dump on their ocs and let me info dump about mine! It makes me SO happy and I will be kicking my feet and giggling the entire time

If someone's oc is rotting in my brain for long enough I'll draw them 🥱

I'm a yapper if you couldn't tell ‼️ I won't shut up about something unless I run out of things to say to it (which is why I over explain things) I also have ADD/ADHD

I'm always up for anything unless it's actually fucking weird- you know what I'm talking about!

Favorite movies:

House of 1000 corpses

The fnaf movie(it's fnaf)

Shows:

Rick and morty

American dad

Super jail

Occasionally Steven Universe

Games:

Fnaf

Minecraft

Roblox

Animal jam

Fandoms:

Creepy pasta (I've been in this one the longest and I don't plan to leave any time soon! Most of my ocs are based on here but they do hop fandoms. After some stuff happened none of them are considered creepy pastas)

Slender verse(my favorite is everymanhybrid‼️I need to finish it, I'm only in like 9 (?) episodes- idk I need to go look)

Super jail(my favorite character has to be Alice! I don't mention this one a lot 🥱)

Sally face(this is a fandom I keep getting pulled back into. I've had more.. Questionable experiences in this one back in 2021-2022

Bands I enjoy listening to that I can remember by name is ICP and Slipknot! Other than that it's pretty scattered. I'll listen to anything that isn't jazz/classical music or sad music (only one song but it's because in my eyes it's good and doesn't seem that sad)

DNI LIST ‼️

people who infantilize characters. (Seriously, you're annoying if you do this. One of my ocs were infantilized A lot by other people because they had arm sleeves and couldn't talk properly. There's no reason to do this to people with disabilities man. He was raised by an animal cult, HE'S NOT GOING TO SPEAK PROPER ENGLISH AND BE A FUNCTIONAL MEMBER IN SOCIETY. It's gotten so bad I made it cannon he's babied and she HATES it. I'm ranting 😭 mb, (summary) It's just really annoying and makes me want to pull my hair out)

Zionist

Ablest

People scared of women with body hair, emos, or scene (I'm not changing my characters because you don't like it :3 I didn't ask for your advice so respectively keep it to yourself)

Homophobes

Transphobes

pedos(blocked.)

Zoophiles(BLOCKED)

people into Alfred's play house. (I heard it's a bad fandom with a lot of romanticized SA, I don't want those type of people interacting with me or my content.)

Ect!

That should be all for my little introduction post. Bye bye!!

Anyone else who is problematic!

[gaykey]

Hi asher could u recommended a bl to me i need something to watch tonite and i trust ur opinion the most :-)

hello anon! sorry this is a bit late! i hope you still get a chance to watch these xx

as i usually do with these asks, i'd like to direct you to my bl recs tag first and foremost, because that's where you'll find all the bl's i've watched and my ultimate faves that i'd really recommend i.e the eclipse, not me, kinnporsche, we best love, the unatamed ect ect.

however, i'd also like to add a few i haven't actually watched, but are on my to watch list

my school president - i knew about this drama before moonlight chicken, but didn't have an interest in watching it, however SINCE watching moonlight chicken, and seeing the talent of fourth & gemini, i really really want to see them in msp

secret crush on you - i heard such good things about this whilst it was airing, but just never got around to watching it. it's incredibly underrated and a really good drama based in the clips and gif sets i've seen.

and of course, one that i have watched but is still pretty new, so won't be on my rec lists yet:

moonlight chicken - i had high expectations going in, because of earthmix, then because of firstkhao, but now also because of fourthgemini. this series is jam-packed with some of the best actors in bl which is worth it alone, but also the story has so many elements & themes. heartbreak, grief, self-acceptance. an all-around evocative show.

so yeah, there are some recs for you anon! enjoy, and also, let me know if you watch any and if you enjoyed them <3

#anon #bl recs

[just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi]

Disobey - Tool

Hallo! Thank you to those of you who told me to get off my ass and write something. And thanks anon! for the inspo! 

Anonymous said:  (For the command thing) Tool ► disobey the Mechanic once

[Masterlist] 

CW: punishment, ECT/electroshock therapy, restraints, seizure, blink and you’ll miss it implied triggering. 

(Also just a disclaimer but y’all are smart Cookies. ECT is an actual medical procedure and not a punishment. The Mechanic is just an asshole and doing it incorrectly on purpose.) 

The Mechanic smiled at his colleague, swirling the liquor in his glass. 

“Tool,” he called casually, deeply enjoying showing off his assistant in front of another. “Bring the bottle.” 

Tool stood next to the bar, at the far end of the room. They didn’t move. The Mechanic shifted in his armchair, craning his next to glance their way. They didn’t see it - their eyes were drilled into the thick carpet. 

Why. Why. Why - why am I like this? Why do I do what he says? 

No. 

“No.” 

The Mechanic snapped his head in their direction, eyes furious. Unbelievably, his assistant lifted their eyes to meet his. 

One would think the man’s teeth would have snapped under the pressure of his clenched jaws. That look was back in his assistant’s eyes. The one from the first day after they had been brought to the manor, the look that had stayed up until their first night in the Machine. 

He hated it more than anything. 

With a bristle, the Mechanic turned to his guest. “Apologies, I don’t know what on earth got into him tonight.” The other man smirked, taking a long drink. 

“No worries. In fact, I would love seeing the Machine in action firsthand.” 

Tool’s already pale face seemed to lose all color, swaying slightly. That. That was why he obeyed. Why he kept silent and submissive and relinquished all control to this man. That was the hell from his nightmares, ones that still came every night. 

How could he have forgotten that he lived next to his own personal hell. 

Before he could open his mouth, before his mind could even try to pull the reigns of his panic to form a response, the Mechanic waved his hand and finished his drink. 

“Tragically, can’t risk it so soon. Had some internal bruising after the last time and that needs to heal ever so slightly more.” 

The other man looked disappointed, but Tool was overcome with relief. Not tonight, not today. Bits of time added to the hourglass, slowly draining away until the next time. He wasn’t so naive to believe that it would never happen again.

“However,” the Mechanic said, his standing prompting his guest to down his drink and stand as well. “There are multiple forms of correction on hand.” 

The pair walked to the door and the Mechanic paused, motioning for Tool to follow only once. Tool swallowed, knowing full well this was their only chance to not make the punishment even worse. So they followed. 

The Mechanic led them all to his office. The guest marveled at the screen and readouts, skimming over the data uncomprehendingly. 

“Tool - the table.” 

Tool moved to obey automatically, cold seeping into his bones. This was the workshop, the Mechanic’s office - easily the second most dangerous room in the manor. 

Easily, Tool opened the hollow cabinet and unfolded the exam table down. Usually it was hidden away, unnecessary and simply filling up space. But there were always tests, always small examinations and experiments that the Mechanic needed it for, so it was always in the room. Always available at a moment’s notice. 

It was padded lightly, restraints hanging loose and haunting. Even as simple strips of leather and rivets, no one could mistake them as harmless or innocent. 

“Tilt it up to 30 degrees and get on your back.” 

Tool paused a moment to let a violent shiver run down his spine. When it was finished, he completed the order and apprehensively laid back. The feeling of the fake leather was already enough to make his skin crawl, to make his tense and joints lock up. It was like the texture could freeze him, trap him there catatonic. 

The Mechanic hummed in approval and stepped over to tighten the restraints. Straps over thin wrists and ankles, across scrawny legs and chest. He left the forehead strap undone for now, but it wouldn’t stay that way. 

“I gotta say, he’s much more behaved now. Wonder what it was that made him stop out there?” 

“No way of knowing. Humans are fickle, complex things. And I would never deny that they are in fact human,” the Mechanic mused as he set a small box on the side tray and peeled back the connector stickers. Tool whimpered softly, remembering the last time he had been punished this way. Before the Machine, before anything, really. 

The guest watched, fascinated as the Mechanic pushed back Tool’s auburn bangs and stuck two connectors on his forehead. “You doing electroshock?” 

“Electroconvulsive therapy,” the older man corrected, slipping a mouthguard between Tool’s teeth. “That’s an outdated term, muddied by horror movies and tales of medical malpractice. Electroconvulsive therapy can be incredibly effective and helpful with many conditions.” He smirked and looked down at his assistant, soaking in their trembling and quick pants through their nose. “Perfectly safe under the watchful eye of a licensed physician, isn’t it?” 

“Are you a licensed physician?” The guest snorted. The Mechanic grinned wildly as he leaned back over to the box. 

“No, I am not.” 

~

The latest round of shocks ended and left Tool panting, writhing against the restraints. He was making a wounded, warbling sound as he laid there limply. He was jittery as if he was in the depth of anxiety, muscles burning and aching. His jaw, his neck, even down into his shoulder burned and pulled. His head was pounding, breaths weak and uneven as he struggled to swallow properly. He was tired, he just wanted this to end.

Tool heard the Mechanic fiddling with something, and let out another broken whimper. No, no more; please.  

“Another round? Damn dude, how many are you gonna do?” 

“Last one. Want to make sure it sticks, so the fear stays even when they forget.” 

“Forget?” asked the guest from his chair. The Mechanic had brought it over for him earlier in the night, grabbing one for himself as well. 

Before he answered the question, he started the next cycle of shocks. Tool jolted and cried out, tense and in pain. The shock lasted no longer than a few seconds, but the seizure it triggered lasted a minute longer. It was a clashing of senses, like he was both ends of a tug of war. Every muscle was weak and loose, but spasming and jerking at the same time. It was stiffness and motion all once, pulling him into a daze and sharpening every sense simultaneously. 

When the convulsions finally went away, Tool was exhausted. They could barely move, barely remember to breathe. Information floated uselessly around them, not meaning much. Finally, they were able to catch the conversation once again. 

“-ike, not at all? Damn.” 

“No way of knowing what they may or may not remember, but there’s a good chance. Don’t worry, you’ll have an opportunity to meet them again. And maybe,” the Mechanic changed his volume, addressing Tool now, “Next time my assistant here will behave from the start.”

Tool whimpered. Yes, Yes they would behave. They would be obedient, they swore it. 

The guest laughed, standing now that the entertainment for the evening was over. “Either works for me! I enjoyed this immensely. You’ve done a fascinating thing, Nigel. I’d love to get my hands on one of my own.” 

The Mechanic smirked knowingly, something plotting in his mind. “Oh, I think that could be arranged.”   

~

tagging @unicornscotty @as-a-matter-of-whump @starnight-whump @whump-me-all-night-long @whump-it @rippedjeansandfadeddreams @valkyrie-whump @cupcakes-and-pain @whole-and-apart-and-between @misspelledwitch @fanmanga1357-blog @jo-doe-seeking-inspo @just-a-raccoon-in-a-party-hat and @thehopelessopus for tool. 

Plz let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist! 

#tool #tool and the machine #whump #punishment tw #restraints tw #medical whump #is this? idk just in queso #electrocution tw #did some bare bare research for this #but I've actually heard pretty good things about ECT #it's supposed to be done under anesthesia #but it's supposed to be quite helpful. #I was just gonna make Tool be in pain but then i saw that ECT triggers little mini SEIZURES #seizures tw #and I was like #HELL YEAH *grabby hands* #i love seizure whump #also haven't had one in a HOT minute (like 4-5 months) #:DD

[kanesthirstblog]

NSFW ALPHABET: ABE HARUAKI

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Requires lots of aftercare but also wants to take care of you. Very clingly, like, will latch onto you and cuddle you for the rest of the night clingy. You should probably give him some reassurance or comfort, he seems like the type to stress about whether or not he was any good to you once the fun is over.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Hmmm... Totally the sappy kinda guy who tells you he loves all of your body and thinks it's beautiful and 100% means every praise he sings you about it. He loves everything about you from your soft hair to the tips of your toes.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

God. Just imagining him sprawled out on any surface with an exhausted yet dopey look in his eyes, covered in his own cum (and/or yours of course!) after a few rounds of sex really makes me feel satisfied. Really can't explain this one

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Secretly a bit of a masochist but also scared of being hurt so he never asks even if he really wants to.

Also secretly owns a couple erotic novels he used as "research" when you first brought up wanting a sexual relationship. Since you are his first, he would want to see how he's supposed to act in that scenenrio so he could please you properly. (But damn was he shocked when you wanted to be the dominant one. That wasn't in his books.) Haruaki learns the importance of communication that day.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Dudes a canon virgin y'all. This also excites me.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Secretly loves it when he's on his back so he can see your face as you ride him or peg him. He just thinks you're the prettiest person he's evermet and loves watching you even as you tease or toy with him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He's a sappy guy. Would probably look at you like a puppy who sees someone they really love. Besides that he's have that dopey look like he's never been happier than he is in that moment, smiling up at you.

Once you've had sex a couple times he might start opening up more, cracking jokes and asking shy requests from you.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Yup. Makes sure he's nice and clean especially

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He really tries hard to be romantic but he has 0 experience in this area and often fumbles his way through it by trying to be sweet and make you feel good. Very bad at saying romantic things and would probably give up after a bit before he dies from embarassment.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Tbh I actually think he'd barely masturbate if he did at all. This is partly because I actually have an asexual headcanon for him and partly cause in canon he seems really put off by sexual things if not being outright afraid of them.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Contrary to some of the fandom headcanons, I don't really imagine the sailor uniform thing as a kink. It just seems like a typical fixation or something that gets played up for laughs to a strange degree. But maybe thats my ADHD dumbass brain projecting my ADHD onto a fave. (Off topic but him knowing everything about sailor uniforms, from design to creation, being able to make them himself, getting happy any time he sees one, ect. Are headcanons I have because his weird fixation with them reminds me of my fixation on rocks, mushrooms, and jewelry.)

HOWEVER

Praise kink. Body worship. He'd love to be pet gently while you tell him how pretty he is. How you love his soft hair or his long legs or slender form as you lightly trail you fingertips down his body or card fingers through his hair. And he would do the same for you too.

Might at least try pegging, and then realizes he actually likes it when you hold him down and pound his ass.

Would be too embarrassed and a bit scared to bring this up but actually likes the idea being treated roughly. If you could pull at his hair and bite him even a little bit he'd practically melt in your hands.

Might try bondage if it's light. Soft hand cuffs or silk ropes are the way to go.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

At home. Anywhere is fine as long as its at home

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

The fastest way is probably being physical with him or just stripping for him. He gets embarassed and tries to hide but you know he's aroused, you can feel it when you sit on his lap.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He'd probably not be okay with having more than one partner. You might frighten him if he starts feeling like you guys are ganging up on him.

Public/semi-public sex is a no go. Especially since he is a teacher, he wouldn't risk his job on the off chance you both get caught.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

I think he actually might no be very into oral at first. But will give or recieve though you may have to hear some complaint about it being kind of unsanitary or something. He's also kinda bad a giving oral but what did you expect? He's a virgin.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Personally prefers the slow and sensual kinda sex but you set the pace regardless so ultimately it's up to you. He won't be turned into a stuttering mess right away if you guys take it slow.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Alright with it as long as it stays private. You'll be the only one asking for these but try to get him in the morning before he leaves for work so you can corner him against a counter. Its best when his back is turned so you can grab his hair and lick along his throat, nipping here and there. He'd shiver in your arms as you trail a hand down to undo his pants

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

As long as it isn't a risk to him (would probably be too scared to try knifeplay) or job (no public/semi-public sex) you could probably talk him into it.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Hmmm... Depends I guess. I feel like he might only be active for a round or maybe 2 before he starts slowing down. You could still pound the guy into the mattress but he'll have those half lidded doe eyes cloudy with exhaustion. He'd wrap his arms around you loosely as if you'll help ground him to the waking world and try to hold you closer to him.

At that point you should definitely ask a few times before you start another round to make sure he's okay and reassure him that it's alright to stop now. Strikes me as someone who could easily fall into a place where he'd hide his desire to stop just so you can use him for your own fun since it makes you happy. That could be kinda bad for his mental health.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

You'd be the one with all the toys tbh. But you can sure as hell use them on him.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He's not much of a tease but if he's feeling playful, he might play up the innocent look of his. He really is a pretty innocent guy actually, but he knows you love that sweet look he's got to him and he will use it on you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

So damn loud. This guy would moan and beg loudly, scream your name and plead for mercy, for relief as you all but eat him alive. Might even cry and whine and beg. Oh, but he tries to be quiet so he doesn't risk disturbing anyone. He'd purse his lips and turn away from you while you play with his body in an attempt to stay quiet but he always gives in quickly. It's easy to turn this guy into a whimpering, begging mess no matter how many times you do this.

You'll know when he's tired because he will be unable to make much noise besides low pants and gasps. Probably best to wrap things up at that point before ya fuck him unconcious.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

I have a few actually.

-Has a hard time saying no to you. He's a bit cowardly and overthinks and he would be afraid to lose a first relationship. This is potentially hazardous to his mental health because he might say "yes" to something he doesn't want for fear of losing you. Consent is important though so even if it's difficult at first, keep checking to make sure he's alright.

-I actually headcanon him as a sex indifferent asexual. He can 100% live with sex or without it. Doesn't matter to him, though he's terrified of trying it for the first time.

-The first time you tried to get him in bed, you pinned him to a wall and he was terrified because he thought you were trying to shake him down or harass him. (Well, the latter part was true but not the way he expected.) And then you kissed him and he straight up broke, wrapped himself in blankets and hid under the futon for the rest of the day. Disappointing? Sure, but damn was it cute.

-I'm actually caught up on how he would take to dirty talk tbh since a lot of it I've seen or heard involves some form or another of calling your partner a slut or whatever. Seems to be popular. On one hand if he's secretly a masochist, he might be into it. But on the other, he also seems like he might take anything you say to him to heart and beat himself up over it and would ultimately not like it. Also probably would not be comfortable if he did the dirty talking and assuming he manages to make it through the night without apologizing to you for everything he says, then you'll hear it when you finish.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Mandragora patterned briefs. You cannot change my mind on this one.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Not very, so he's pretty chill about it.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Depends on how much you exhausted him but it usually doesn't take that long.

Bonus:

Some more cute Haruaki.

#youkai gakkou no sensei hajimemashita #a terrified teacher at ghoul school #abe haruaki #haruaki abe #nsfwheadcanons

[scarecoen]

Trigger warning ⚠️ domestic violence.

I've typed this story a million times so I'm just going to summarize as much as I can.

A few days ago I was assaulted by my partner's family members. And as I've mentioned, I've typed this a million times and I'm honestly just exhausted thinking about it, but we could use some help.

My partner has always had a transphobic family. (I don't have anyone but my dad, who's in no position to help anyone.)

Her mom used her disability against her and manipulated her into giving her MOST of her checks. She's abused the system and my girlfriend.

When I met Jackie, she was with a terrible biggot. Jackie had came out, and her mother conspired with an abusive long distance ex, to fly her here, to stage an "intervention" and stop my partner from transitioning.

It worked. For years.

I met Jackie here on tumblr, we became good, SECRET friends because she wasn't allowed to talk to anyone.

I told Jackie openly about my views regarding gender and how I myself, was not cis.

Eventually she told her partner about us playing games together, which she responded to by harassing me.

Jackie ended up spilling the beans to me, about her mom, about the ex, everything. I realized that she had been extremely isolated and controlled her whole life.

So I intervened.

I got the two of them to separate, which wasn't smooth because Jackie was scared. She had been with her abuser for 9 years at this point. She's never known anything else.

The ex moved back to her state, and I started seeing Jackie, although she was stuck at her mom's... who was trying to play innocent at this time.

Eventually, I kinda just came and picked her up, she stayed the night, she didn't want to go back home. And I can't blame her. The house wasn't only disgusting, her family microagressed her all the time and they would tell her to pretty much stay in a dark room all day.

Ofc I didn't bring her back.

During early quarantine, we had a lot of self reflection and she started distancing herself from her mother, coming around to holding her accountable for her horrible actions.

Her mom messaged her things like "Why won't you talk to me? It's like you're trying to punish us!" Ect, just every fucking manipulative thing she could say, without ever apologizing.

Unfortunately the place we were staying fell through when my best friend's ex husband decided he wants a divorce and decided to throw in some transphobic hatespeach towards me.

We were all looking for somewhere to go.

I'm sure you know where this is going but listen, she told us EVERYTHING we wanted to hear. She told us she's not hateful now, told us she would go to trans support groups, pride, said she's realized how much she loves Jackie and it's time to accept her- and look- we had NO WHERE TO GO. We have 2 cats and at the time, a car that has no a/c or functional locks. AND I have a chronic autoimmune condition that I recently started taking chemo meds for. (Methotrexate.)

I'm too sick to be on the street, and survive. I had to think about me, Jackie, Zoe, and Boops.

And Jackie wanted to go..

I told her we'd be cautious and try to get out asap.

Well, looking for places right when the housing market crashed really fucked us up. That- and because I had only just finally got approved for disability, means I was set back in life- and had no credit to my name. No credit= no place to live.

I had almost built enough, but things went down hill very quickly with her family. Which leads us to right now:

After weeks of microagressions, giving us breakthrough covid cases, yelling at us to clean other's messes, and forcing us and our cats to isolate in our room, many broken promises, and straight up transphobic hatespeach (because she promised to get vaccinated but then said nvm as soon as we moved in and she went on vacation and got covid and gave it to us, which nearly killed me--) she said not getting the vaccine "IS A CHOICE, JUST LIKE YOU BEING TRANS AND TAKING *gestures to my testosterone* THOSE DRUGS."

We just were avoiding each other while I desperately try to gather resources for us to get out, NOW.

Of course, that wasn't good enough, so when her step father messaged her in all caps about our cats having to stay in our room and "I WON'T FUCKING TELL YOU AGAIN" my partner had a breakdown..

Her mom had let her step dad talk to her like this her whole life, basically.

Out of desperation, we went to her sister for help, maybe hoping she'd give us a place to stay for two weeks while we sign off on the lease for our new apartment.

She pretended to want to help and even said... something fucking weird? She made the comment that I'm a good person and I'm so much like her own boyfriend, that it's "scary"...

A few hours later she came to the house. She talked nicely to us, to gain access to our bedroom.

Then she attacked me.

I called the police right before, and was on the phone with dispatch when she lunged at me because she was aggressively trying to MAKE Jackie go into a separate room WITHOUT ME and Jackie was saying no, BEGGING her to STOP.

I wasn't going to let her take Jackie into that room. She looked fucking crazy.

All of the family came into our room, her two sisters, her mom, and her cousin- When they heard yelling.

It was actually me telling her mom that she's a terrible mother, that triggered her sister to try and attack me- although I knew she was planning on trying to from the moment she came into our room.

And that was after her mom was screaming in my face that if I have something to say, say it now.

Dispatch heard everything and sent emt as well...

But the police stayed outside, talking to them for a WHILE before even asking for us.

Her cousin is the only one that would have stood up for me, saying her sister never should have tried to hit me. But he was in the room with Jackie, giving her support...

I faced the cops alone.

He already had "that look."

He shined a light into my eye, letting the family stay on the porch, throwing insults and just letting it happen. He asked me where I'm hurt, and before I could even show him the scratches on my arm, he said "how do I know YOU didn't put those there?"

I wanted to fucking die in that moment.

This is a conservative city.

No one has equality stickers here. No one flies gay flags. People here that are lgbt- they LEAVE.

This is EXACTLY WHY.

I said "well is there any reason I should tell you anything when, clearly, you're already bias?"

I looked at the emts. I looked at his partner. I looked at all the lights and people coming out of their houses-

And behind me was her family.

Her sister that assaulted me, was laughing about having work in the morning.

All of them were looking at me, with hate in their eyes.

He tried to feed me bullshit about "well if I'm taking someone to jail, there has to be proof."

He dismissed everything I attempted to say, until I just stared at the ground and he decided he did his job here.

I told him my whole fucking body hurts because I had 4 people fucking toss my 100lbs ass all over the fucking room, which was a mess that he refused to look at.

He said "I don't see bruises."

I SPAT "BRUISES TAKE TIME?"

He retorted IMMEDIATELY- "YOU'RE NOT EVEN RED."

I asked what about the dispatcher- she seemed concerned- to which he said "you see, sometimes when people call us- they scream and be dramatic- for a quicker response."

I asked what we could do while the two weeks go by for our new place, and he fucking said "I DONT KNOW. BARRICADE YOURSELF IN YOUR ROOM OR SOMETHING."

Needless to say, we are now safe, in a hotel and I've gotten in touch with a few lgbt organizations that are attempting to help us get justice.

Unfortunately because it's a holiday weekend, all we can do is wait right now.

Our first order of business is getting a protection order, so that we can retrieve the rest of our things without her sister trying to attack us again. (I say us because she kept jumping towards Jackie, like she was threatening to hit her.)

I've been so gaslit and victim blamed that I was too scared to go to the er, even though this all happened in the midst of a flare, possibly including my liver health.

There's so much more to this story, as I'm sure other trans people can relate.. unfortunately.

The emts reluctantly offered to take me to the er, but I was like "and leave my partner here with them?" And he just fucking shrugged dude.

I hate this city.

I want out so bad but unfortunately I've committed to a year, but at least it'll be *our* apartment.

We could NOT stay there for two more weeks. Her step dad is a violent offender that has attempted to murder a homeless prostitute over some fucking pocket change- and he has a GUN in the house.

This hotel might run us into a hole, despite it being the cheapest, shittiest hotel in town, it's still going to be about 700$ for ONE week.

To ADD INSULT TO INJURY, SOMEONE ATTEMPTED TO STEAL MY VEHICLE WHILE WE'VE BEEN STAYING HERE.

I'm feeling incredibly paranoid and unsafe, but I'm on anxiety meds now at least and its SORTA helping us cope (My partner and I have the same Dr and she gave her permission to have some.)

The organization BRAVO is trying to help us with a hotel voucher, but because of all the natural disasters, it's hard to find room in charity for people like us, which is fair enough. We aren't immediately on the street, and for that I'm incredibly thankful.

However, if you or anyone you know wish to help you can donate to venmo: kittyzibby. Or you could just signal boost this.

If you can't help, I understand. And IF YOU'RE STRUGGLING FINANCIALLY, don't worry about it, for real.

Right now I'm just scared we'll go into debt before getting the apartment settled in.

I will update on things once our case moves along more, and we were already considering turning to OF sexwork before all of this, so if there could be support that way, maybe we'll get that going once we get moved in. That way, I feel good about providing a service in return.

Thank you so much for sticking with us during all of this. And really- we're doing much better today. We've given each other pep talks, but we are still determined to start our lives together.

Her family was merely trying to scare me away from her, but I got my girl's name tatted on me for a reason.

I know I'm not the bad person here.

Every time Jackie is feeling more gender euphoric, and showing me her changes, and seeing her get more confident, the more I know that what I'm doing with and for her, is right.

I love her so much. And I will never abandon her, like they tried to get me to do.

Jackie is taking a break from some socials, but she's given me permission to talk about what's been happening.

She needs justice too.

I will update as much as I can, but seriously, I think we both just have a fire under our asses now.

Mentally, we're stronger than ever.

Thank you for reading. My heart really goes out to the rest of the queer community that have experienced or are going through similar things.

It's really made me realize why we need to stick together and fight this bigotry bullshit! 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈

#tw abuse #tw #trigger warning #tw domestic violence #tw trauma #tw assault #tw hatecrime #tw transphobia #tw homophobia #alt #emoboy #emo boy #piercings #altboy #alternative #vent #trans #ftm #genderqueer #nonbinary #enby #nb #transmasc #transgirl #transpoc #trans poc #battery #bruises #tw bruises #tw scratches

[that-1-ninja-wizard]

Why am I doing this kiddo?

A'ight fine, let's get this over with.

Hi, I'm Kaigun Uchiha. I was born to... That doesn't matter, and I was raised by Inferuneel, the Inferno Dragon.

Being the son of a dragon is pretty cool, especially considering my mom is the sister of Igneel, the Fire Dragon King, so... Yeah.

Anyway, I'm being told by the kid that I gotta move this along, so...abilities? Aight then.

First off, chakra: Having been born as an Uchiha, I obviously am able to use Fire Release Jutsu: Great Fireball, Pheonix Flower, you name it.

I also was born with a proficiency with Wind Release Jutsu. I haven't learned too many, but the Mass Wind-Blades Jutsu and the Wind Bullet Jutsu have come in pretty handy.

I also have access to some Jutsu that aren't affiliated with an element, including a pretty rare Jutsu called the Rasengan. It's a small sphere of pure chakra that I can slam into a target, but I have figured out how to combine it with elemental Chakra for the Hellblaze Rasengan (Fire Release) and the Rasenshuriken (wind release, also this is one I stole learned from the nine-tails kid, so yeah).

Also I can use the Shadow clone Jutsu... Not much else to say here, I can make like... Five at most... I'm not great at it but I don't tend to use it...

Also (because I'm an Uchiha) I have access to the Sharingan, although only in one eye (we'll cover the other eye later). My Sharingan gives me greater perspective abilities as well as splitting off into two 'trees'. The Eye of Insight is linked to the increased perceptive abilities, and also means I'm able to copy Jutsu so long as I'm physically capable of doing so. The perceptive abilities granted by the Eye of Insight are crazy, even letting me predict my opponents moves via their muscle tension. It also let's me see chakra and even gives it colour so that I can distinguish different sources, as well as letting me see irregularities in someone's chakra. The Eye of Hypnotism grants me some pretty decent Genjutsu abilities (although I'm not exactly an expert) like subtle coersion, smaller and larger scale Genjutsu, stuff like that.

The Sharingan can be (and in my case, has been) taken one step further via the Mangekeyo Sharingan, which grants the user a unique ability in each eye. Mine has actually been takes a step further than that into the Eternal Mangekeyo Sharingan... Its basically just the normal Mangekeyo without the consequences, but hey, I'll take what I can get. Obviously, I only have the one, but my Kaiten is pretty powerful as it let's me spin something in my focal point in one of two ways. I can either spin something around its own centre (good for sending quick attacks off course... Or for spinning people), or around an axis (good for dealing with larger attacks or to gain some distance).

Anyway, I promised I'd talk about my other eye, so yeah. Under my father's headand is a pretty crazy Dojutsu called the Tenseigan. My Tenseigan (when active) gives me a slight healing factor, flight, increased physical abilities, and the Mooncutter Jutsu (a large yellow beam that supposedly could cut the moon in half if used by someone with two Tenseigan). It also gives me a glowing blue outline, and makes my hair glow that same light blue, so yeah... I guess that's a thing. It takes masses of chakra though...

Finally, we have my Jinchuriki abilities. Being the Jinchuriki of the Two Tailed Beast, Matatabi, I have access to some of her abilities. For example, in Matatabi Chakra Mode stage two (MCM II) I can use the Bijudama (or Tailed Beast Ball), a massive sphere of Biju chakra that causes massive destruction. I can also summon a Matatabi 'Avatar' that functions similarly to what I've heard about the Susanoo. I'm also able to summon parts fo that avatar instead of the whole thing, in case I need to sheild myself or want an extra angle to attack from.

Alright then, magic now: First up is my Inferno Dragonslayer Magic. It's probably easiest to compare it to Fire Dragonslayer Magic, as that's technically what it is, ish. Essentially, Inferno Dragon Magic is a mutation of Fire Dragon Magic, which creates much hotter flames, but means the user can only consume flames the same colour as their own. In my case, I can only eat Blue fire because my flames are blue, my mom is the same but with Yellow flames, ect, ect. Inferno Dragonslayer Magic grants me all kinds of abilities, ranging from Inferno Dragon's Roar (a massive plume of blue flames from the mouth), to Inferno Dragon's Flare (a short-range explosion of blue fire from the hand), to Inferno Dragon's Iron fist (a punch laced with blue flames) and way more. Although, I've been told my signature move is Inferno Dragon's Flame-Blitz: a move which let's me become a ball of blue flame and fly around as crazy speed... It's honestly pretty fun. I've also got my Sky-Blaze Dragon Mode (a form which massively powers me up as well as augmenting my magic with Sky Dragonslayer magic), and Dragonforce (a straight power-boost at a crazy level, at least 10 times stronger than Sky-Blaze Dragon Mode).

Next up is Requip Magic, a type of magic I learned (well, the basics anyway) from a friend of mine at the Guild (thanks Erza!). Requip Magic let's me store weapons in a pocket dimension and draw them out at will, which I've done with my father's sword Flamebringer, as well as many Kunai, Shuriken, and even some Butane-based paper bombs.

Finally, I started learning Dark God Magic from Remnant's God of Darkness (long story) which has given me access to some pretty mental techniques. Dark God's Counter-Strike is a spell that reflects all magic back at the caster, however, I have to drag my hand along a blade for a set number of seconds (1-4) and then Slash at the spell with the blade. The number of seconds changes the power of the reflected spell (1 second is same strength, 4 seconds is 4 times the strength) and also changes the 'cool-down' period on it (1 second = 1 min cool-down, ect). Dark God's Accent is pretty much teleportation, but it has two variants: the fast, short-range version; and the slower to start, long-range version.

Also, I can use Dark God's Devestation, but I don't feel like killing everything on the planet (including me).

So yeah, lastly, weapons:

Flamebringer: a blackened kusanagi with a long blade, it was made for two handed use, but you can get away with using it one handed...just. The blade is constantly on fire, although the flame doesn't actually burn until you channel chakra into the blade, at which point you can get anything from a better cut to a full on fire-blast depending on how much chakra you use.

Kunai: it's a type of throwing-knife. I have like, 20.

Shuriken: just shuriken, I have quite a few

Butane Paper Bombs: like normal paper bombs, they explode. Unlike normal paper bombs, the flame is blue, so I can throw them into a fire attack and change that attack from an annoyance to a benefit.

So yeah, that's me, Kaigun Uchiha. Y'know, I didn't think I was gonna enjoy this whole 'tumblr' thing, but I just might... I'll have to thank the Kid later...

#Meet Kaigun #Kaigun Uchiha #Oc #Character intro

[dent-de-leon]

Hi Leo. Lately I've been reading more fics with trans Keith because they've been popping up and I've really liked them. I've been writing my own fic for a while, but the trans Keith fics have made me think if I could make him trans in my fic too. I'm just nervous because I'm a cis woman that I'll fuck it up. Keith also has a major secret in the fic that he keeps and I worry it might perpetuate negative stereotypes. Any advice? Sorry to bother ^^;.

Oh :o I feel like I’m not a writing expert by any means but uh, just in general?? Personally I’d say:

Mmm….I can see why you’d worry about the secret thing a little, that can feel…heavyhanded in a way? But if you’re careful I think you might still be able to write that into his character without it reading as a bad metaphor for being closeted or something like that. 

But I’d say don’t make it some big reveal that he’s trans, it’s better to just have that be a known and accepted part of him. Especially don’t do a reveal with someone like,, walking in on him changing or something, or basically just being outed against his will.

I’ve heard it said that in situations like this it’s cool for people who aren’t trans to write trans characters, but generally most people would perfer if cis writers didn’t write about being trans. As in, don’t write about say, someone’s whole journey transitioning or life exerpiences as a trans person. At least, not without doing your research and consulting actual trans people to make sure you’re sensitive enough to it, you know? 

The whole character’s identity shouldn’t just boil down to “they’re trans,” or feel shoehorned in. It should feel natural, and they shouldn’t exist as just a throwaway token trans character. 

Don’t have other characters treat your trans character any differently, to me it’s nice to see that people are respectful and supportive of their identity without making a big deal about it or acting like it’s anything but normal. If you’re sticking with VLD’s setting, I’ll also mention that the show runners have said there’s no homophobia (and presumably no transphobia). So with a setting like that, people would be especially accepting and it wouldn’t be anything out of the ordinary at all. 

Try not to have other characters focus on viewing apsects of him as somehow less masculine. And if there are features like that, please don’t go out of your way to highlight them as being somehow effeminite or noticeably “different.” Instead, you can focus on how your character is/feels masculine, how they choose to present themselves, them being comfortable in their own skin, ect. 

I also think in general that it’s probably not a good idea for cis writers to like, try going in depth with the body dysphoria trans people experience, becuase it’s just…one of those things that you kinda have to live it to really know it, you know? So I’d just be careful about sensitive things like that.

I’m also gonna run through some medical things real quick just cause,, even if it’s in fiction I think it’s pretty important to not spread misinformation about medical things that people might read and just be like “oh, that’s how that works!!” Yeah,, so–Don’t keep a trans boy in a binder all day, that boy will SUFFER,, it hurts your chest and it’s rough on breathing sometimes, and you’re not supposed to wear it for more than 8 hours. Even if you want to go longer–don’t push it. 

please avoid making some character ask the “so what’s in your pants” question 

aLSO,, PLEASE DON’T HAVE HIM EXERCIsE IN THAT BINDER I’M BEGGING,, exercise and strenuous activity in a binder is a big no-no,,, nevER,, and don’t sleep in that either! No ace bandages or something that’s gonna like contort and harm your body,, please,,, bind safely,,

Not all trans guys bind or have top surgery or take T. There’s no set way to “be” trans, and one way of choosing to present yourself doesn’t automatically make you “more” or “less” trans than someone else. 

I’ve had friends ask me if you’re treated as like,, less valid by other trans people if you don’t have surgery, and I had to explain that that wasn’t the case. They were also shocked that I wanted top surgery but didn’t care about having a dick. Like, they couldn’t wrap their minds around it?? Being trans is gonna mean something different to everyone, and there’s no list of set things you have to do before you “become” a guy. Trans guys are all complete guys as is, and they don’t have to change every aspect of themselves to adhere to a strict gender binary’s rules. 

Really though, there are no hard or fast rules here. I think tons of people would appreciate it though if you put in the research and took some care with the more sensitive parts of tis subject! I like the trans Keith headcanon myself, it’s fun to me. Thanks for being considerate enough to reach out for a trans person’s opinon first, that was very kind and I super appreciate it!! I’m sorry if I couldn’t be more of help, but I wish you good luck with your writing no matter what you decide to do :’)) 

#aLSO #a friend trying to help me #once told me that no one would really want to date me because im trans but not 'fully transitioned' #don't #just #don't tell people that... #don't write characters telling fictional trans people that either #its just uh #just dont

[yuckycryptid]

Dream Daddy Cult ending.

So from looking up sources, refreshing twitter, tumblr, and reddit in search for what is going on, i have a pretty good understanding of what this secret ending with Joseph is about.

I believe how it started was someone trying to find out if there was a good ending with Joseph. As of now, (7/23/17) all i know is that there is a ending where Joseph has sex with you, and then goes back to his wife. I heard that there was a second ending where you stay his side hoe, but i haven’t gotten that ending nor seen anyone else get it. I guess while data mining someone had found and posted the dialog where you wake up after having sex with Joseph, you are in a underground ‘dungeon’. 

The dialog goes on to show that Joseph is not human at all, but some sort of demon. He calls his kids ‘vessels’ that are apart of him. Joseph tells your dad that you are underground below the cul-de-sac and anyone who has ever seen this place has died. Joseph then says: 

“…Just think of it as the real Margarita Zone.”

Then Joseph admits that the reason why all the dads in the area are single is because he hunted them down and was using their power to fuel this entity(?)  

It doesn’t stop there, Joseph goes on to say:

“Now you’ll excuse me, there’s some other business I need to attend to. Your dear friend Robert has been awfully worried about you. I think it’s about time that miserable drunk gets one last visit from the Dover Ghost.’’

After this Mary shows up and sets you free, you run and run and make it back home somehow. Once you get in Amanda greets you and things seem normal…until you ask her when he birthday is and you realize that Joseph made a fake Amanda. The “demon” Amanda turns to ash and this is followed by you trying to stab Joseph with the knife that Robert gave you. You drop the knife in the struggle, where Mary grabs the knife and stabs Joseph. His children attack him and possibly eat him(?). You end up waking up in bed and told by Amanda that the yacht you were on sank. Joseph was found to be taking money from the church and was no where to be found. 

Detective Saul Graves comes in and tells you he saw the underground dungeon himself and that his own wife died mysteriously. 

http://pfl-washington.tumblr.com/post/163265622355/ddadds-spoilers

Looking deeper into the game, people started to find sprites that go along with this storyline.

To Mary holding the bloody knife she stabbed Joseph with.

Joseph being stabbed in the shoulder.

Detective Saul Graves. (possibly voiced by Ross or Jacob Anderson: https://notsodreamydaddy.tumblr.com/post/163309240604/saulcalldanger04 )

“demon” Amanda.

There’s even more, including Joseph’s vessel children, the background to the dungeon, different facial features for characters…ect

https://notsodreamydaddy.tumblr.com/

Then even more was found…Background music, voice clips for Mary, Saul, creepy footsteps, and very disturbing background music.

https://notsodreamydaddy.tumblr.com/post/163259217464/synthcult

Now, for the speculation. Everything above was found IN THE GAME. 

People started to make some connections to Robert and Joseph. Robert has a odd looking tattoo that he doesn’t want to talk about. Joseph has the same tattoo, and that symbol keeps showing up in the game.

On Joseph’s walls…

This is the cult’s symbol. Its all through the game, and in the actual dungeon.

The symbol is even on the build your dad clothing options…

Not to mention the times robert warns you about joseph and how they had some twisted past together.

People having been saying that this ending was a Halloween DLC.

 I would like an answer as to: 1.) Who said it was a DLC and were the screenshot proof is. 2.) If it is a Halloween DLC, why is the cult symbol EVERYWHERE IN GAME. 3.) Why would they have a DLC for a game that just came out a few days ago..

I’ve seen people also say that it was something the game devs wanted to take out, thinking it was too much for a silly queer dating sim. This is more believable. I heard that one of the devs is into the horror genre, but this isn’t confirmed. Even so, why would they leave so much code in for data miners to find and cause people to get upset over. If they didn’t want to upset anyone why did they leave so much in for people to find?

As what I've seen and heard, at the moment there is no way of getting this ending. The code is apparently broken and wont start like the other endings.

These could all could be possible ideas….If there wasn’t a steam achievement out for “Escape from Margarita Zone” that no one has gotten. 

Along with that achievement, there’s “World’s okayest Dad” which no one out of the thousands of people playing can unlock. ( sidenote: someone on reddit said they got the achievement and wouldn’t say how, but looking deeper into it they seemed to have hacked the achievement and not gotten it ‘naturally’)

Ending notes:

I think that you can get the achievement and this chapter 18, cult ending. It might be a “true” ending, but that’s up to the person playing to decide.

HoodiePanda hosted a stream where he said himself that there is a possible Mary bug that the devs have confirmed which might be the reason we cant unlock this ending. This guy has played 24+ hours on this game and i think i can agree.

maybe we’ll never know…

#dream daddy cult ending #spoilers #dream daddy spoilers #i'm using this post to put together everything i know and all the evidence #this is mostly for me because i am obsessive and won't stop until i find the answer i want

[heavyweightheart]

do you know anything about ect, or know any good sources about it? I'm looking into it with my therapist but I'm a little scared. everything I've heard about abuse and malpractice wrt mental illness makes me worried something terrible will happen and mistrustful of immediately available sources

I want to tread carefully and remind you that I’m not a psychiatric professional, but as you can probably guess I lean toward deep skepticism when it comes to this type of physical treatment, as I do with chemical ones. 

First, ECT should only be considered if other first-line interventions have not been successful. And if you have eating issues, you are fully refed and energy balanced (weight restored, not restricting or in restriction/reactive eating cycles). If you haven’t spent an extended period of time working with a good, helpful therapist who uses treatment modalities that are better supported by the data (CBT, DBT, ACT, EMDR, etc.) then those need to be tried first. So, if you’ve tried other things, other therapists, other modalities, and are NOT in an active eating disorder…

ECT is pretty controversial, and with good reason. A lot of psych professionals say that it’s not the electroshock therapy of yore, but actually there has been little demonstrated improvement in safety and outcomes since that time. Anecdotally, I know people who’ve done it and felt helped, and I know people who’ve done it and believe they have permanent damage. Memory loss is routine.

I’m afraid of influencing you too much here (please remember that I’m just one random blogger on the internet) but I’ll give you some resources that look critically at ECT. Good luck

https://breggin.com/category/electroshock-ect/

https://www.madinamerica.com/2017/06/no-psychiatrist-needs-use-ect/

https://www.bizjournals.com/prnewswire/press_releases/2017/05/23/NY97983

http://www.criticalpsychiatry.co.uk/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=278:ect-and-training&catid=35:documents&Itemid=56

#electroconvulsive therapy #communistvashoth

[magicalzombiegirl]

what annoys me is people acting like they're being forced to read negative su discourse when they can block it. There's a whole tag for discourse and they don't have to go in the tag if they don't like it. People enjoy shows in different ways, some like making cute art, some like analyzing all the pros and cons and both are valid. No-one is telling them they're not allowed to like the show anymore. I've never seen a fandom so ridiculously hostile towards criticism.

I’m not trying to say you’re wrong, but the SU fandom’s discourse has evolved from just being basic criticism and it isn’t as easy to avoid it as you may think. 

Some people refuse to tag their discourse, or will intentionally go on to blogs of people that disagree with them and hound them with asks about said thing. Some people (like me) don’t have any form of xkit or tumblr extension to block tags so if someone is crosstagging in the main tag, you can’t avoid it. And even I, who follows a bunch of good people who aren’t actively involved in the discourse will still see it pop up on my dash every now and again.

I’ve never been in the discourse tag, and rarely go into the SU tag unless something cool has happened on the show and yet I’m still sometimes slammed in the face with it unexpectedly, despite doing my best to not be a part of any of it. 

Yes there are people with reasonable criticisms, but the only responses I’ve personally seen to those are people properly explaining why these things aren’t as bad as they seem, eg the stylistic changes, plot points being ‘forgotten’ when in actuality they’re brought up many episodes later, ect.

What’s known as the discourse in the fandom is far from just reasonable criticism. People hound, shame, and argue over honestly stupid things. I’m pretty sure at one point there was an SU writer who was attacked for saying ‘let people draw what they want’ because that included skinny Rose. (like sure I don’t like the idea of people drawing skinny Rose, but I’m not going to attack someone over it like half of the fandom did). The SU fandom is actually a pretty toxic place where unless you completely remove yourself from it you’re always going to catch wind about some kind of discourse going on, because the people starting it want to be heard, don’t want to be ignored, and will refuse to let anyone have a different opinion from them. 

#like idk how but it sounds like you've managed to keep away from it all which is great for you #but it's not as easy to avoid as you make it seem #and it's not nearly as innocent as you may think #i know one girl got sent messages telling her to die for drawing skinny rose at one point #the su fandom is awful #anon