#bro is literally a humanized version of these pumpkins

[t0b7z-pl47h0u53]

The same goddamn energy

#jerome valeska #bro is literally a humanized version of these pumpkins

[leviathans-watching]

om m.list ━ brothers (part 1)

[back] | [part 2]

➳ edit 7/11/23: i hit 100 links on here, so everything posted on/after this date will be found in part 2!!

cupping their cheeks

awkward/embarrassing situations they've been in

sleeping/waking up with them (includes dateables)

dancing with them (includes dateables)

how they confess to you

"you were mean to me in my dream" (includes diavolo)

choosing the 'parent' tiktok trend (includes diavolo & barbatos)

chill mc (includes barbatos & simeon)

mc's afraid of bugs

mc doesn't celebrate their birthday (includes dateables)

rejecting them

rejecting them alt version

calling them by a pet name

when they hurt your feelings

coming out as nonbinary

mc w/ braces

seeing you in cute pjs

mc's afraid of needles

reactions to teaching diavolo wap

when you have a nightmare

wanting to cuddle you

teen delinquent!mc

holding their hands

reactions to you crying

comforting you when your dreams are insulted

hardworking mc

sharing their birthdate

sharing their birthdate alt version

calling them your whole world

using their shampoo (includes diavolo & simeon)

how they act on vacation

'losing interest' tiktok prank

defending you from a creep

coming out as ace (includes solomon)

when they're jealous

when they see snow

catching you sleeping

when you have art/writers block

"would you still love me if i were a worm"

waking them up to ask if they're asleep

at your wedding

burned-out mc

'the ick' prank

slow dancing with them

comforting a heartbroken mc

their morning routines

going on a boba date with them

seeing mc all bundled up for the cold

using kisses as leverage

picking them up from the airport

them as seasons

how they give you the ick

touching their horns/tails/etc.

slow learner mc

mc w/ glasses

before you

falling asleep in front of them

valentine’s day with the obey me boys

explaining the dentists to them | part 2

mc on their period

mc isn’t playing therapist

"i didn't want to be here"

you're dating someone?!?!?

mc’s brothers

carving pumpkins with them

nowhere to go for the holidays

mc with type 1 diabetes

when they (try to) surprise you

when they turn into toddlers

having a hard time in the human realm

comforting you after a loss

chaotic/feral mc texts (includes dateables)

photo not loading

adult twins are cringe

pride month?

deleting everyone cute

mc craving sweets during that time of the month

obey me boys as funny tweets | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | pt 5 | (includes dateables)

the brothers at university

pet names they call you (includes dateables)

om characters as wikihow memes (includes dateables)

obey me bros + pinterest nails

“he wants to order”

things not to say when someone comes out (includes dateables)

D&D(evildom) Beyond! - 6.5k, oc!mc

“Leviathan, Abel, what were you doing?” Lucifer prompts, and the two share a look.

“We were playing Dungeons and Dragons,” Leviathan begins slowly, “which, now that I’m looking–”

“–Our opening scene was awfully similar to this,” Abel finishes.

“Wait, are you saying you think we’re in your campaign?” Satan asks, eyes wide, and Leviathan nods.

“I mean, it makes total sense,” he says with budding excitement. “Like, I’m obviously supposed to be a ranger, Abel’s definitely an artificer, and Lucifer’s a total paladin. This is so cool, it’s like my dreams are being brought to life right before my eyes!”

my new neighbors are demons *not clickbait* - 1.3k

I love your writing ❤️❤️❤️

Can I request a shot with MC’s neighbor sort of just moving in and seeing the shenanigans of MC’s life that is the three realms.

Chaotic lessons from Solomon.

Accidentally catching MC using magic through a window they forgot to close.

Talking to Dia and Barbatos and Dia missing all social cues and taking everything literally.

Either be MC x Mammon or platonic with all

But also the brothers as they waltz into MC’s home whenever they are or are not in their home.

I can also see luke and mc bringing this guy extra sweets they baked

I’m sorry, I know this is a lot. I just thought your writing would match this perfectly.

come hell or high water - WIP; fem!reader

“Let’s get one thing straight,” he barks. “I don’t like you, nor do I respect you. This whole program is utterly ridiculous and I fear Prince Diavolo is a fool for suggesting such a thing. You’re just a lowly human, got that? You’ll always be nothing, especially to me, The Great Mammon.”

If he was looking for tears or offense, you were afraid that is not what he’d receive. You’d been playing the court since you were young, so these insults were nothing new to you. Actually, it was almost a relief for him to underestimate you because of your status as a human, and not a woman. Men were so dreadfully pigheaded sometimes, and you were sick and tired of having to play the good girl card, only smiling demurely instead of sharing your mind as you wished.

“Not going to say anything?” Lord Mammon snorts, and you cock your head at him.

“My apologies, Lord Mammon,” you say, “for I had not realized you were done speaking. I’m afraid I wasn’t listening all that closely.” Lord Mammon gapes at you, but you’re not finished. “Furthermore, I don’t know what the women down here are like, but I assure you, a few brash curse words and scowls thrown my way is not enough to scare me.”

(A Regency AU. Sort of)

mc on her period - 1.5k; fem!reader

“MC?” he asks, stepping closer to you. You manage a weak smile though you think it may have come across as a painful grimace. “Are you sick? Why are you huddled on the couch with like-” he pauses, eyes flicking over you, “-five blankets?”

You’re still not super used to any of them, what with you only having been in the Devildom for a few weeks, but you figure there’s no need to mince words. Demons could handle a bit of vaginal bleeding, couldn’t they?

“I’m on my period,” you say, and he winces. Maybe they couldn’t.

Sticks & Stones - 13k

“MC seemed off today, right?” Satan asked, looking at his brothers.

“For sure.” Belphie agreed, and it was quiet for a moment.

“I was going to ask why they were wearing your jacket, Mammon, but now I’m more worried about this,” Leviathan remarked, and Mammon smirked a little, but it was overshadowed by concern for his human.

“To be honest,” Asmo dabbed at his mouth daintily with a napkin. “I’ve been noticing it for a little while now, not just today.”

“As have I.” Lucifer seemed more serious than usual. “It is our duty as MC’s hosts to make sure that their time in the Devildom is satisfactory, and if they’re feeling down, it would be a good idea to know why.”

“Because we’re their hosts,” Mammon mocked. “Lucifer, we’re all worried about them, so ya can admit it too.”

* * *

You had been feeling a little low in terms of yourself, and the brothers decide to remind you if your self worth.

Are We Really Sure Crazy Equals Genius? - 2.5k; fem!reader

anon ask: can i request a obey me fic where female mc is super badass but also kinda crazy? like she has a gun or something idrk? thanks xx

#obey me #obey me game

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: F Boy (again)

Debut: Super Mario Land 2: Six Golden Coins

It feels so strange to look back on my very first post for this blog! It’s so... dry! Where’s the passion? Back then I really had no idea what I was doing and was just kind of imitating Mod Chikako hoping nobody would notice... but thanks to all the love this blog has received, I think I can write with a lot more confidence now! Not to get all sappy on the first paragraph, but I really appreciate everyone who reads this blog with all of my heart. And that includes You!

But if I’d known I’d spend several years using the moniker “Mod F Boy”, I probably would’ve put more thought into the name I picked, huh? I’m not even sure I’m a boy anymore! I just thought the name was funny and that was that! But given how indecisive I can be, maybe it’s a good thing it was so spontaneous... Like it or not though, I am more attached to the concept of “F Boy” then I was three and a half years ago, so it’s only fair I give F Boy the post he deserves and write a whole lot more about him! 

Believe it or not, F Boy is a fire enemy! A single flame with dot eyes, the classic design they’ve been using since Fire! I’ve expressed love for them in the past, but this little dude is a little different... it isn’t found in a lava or castle stage like you might expect, but the spoooky scaaary stages, AKA Pumpkin Zone! Why’s that?

Enter the hitodama! Literally using the characters for “human soul”, these ghostly wisps of fire from Japanese folklore are probably something you’re familiar with even if you don’t know it! The Litwick Pokémon line, the flames on Jibanyan’s tail, the little flames around the boy from the toilet anime, or even the Embers from Paper Mario... that’s really just a couple of specific examples off the top of my head, but they are in basically anything associated with Japanese ghosts! 

Though... all this time I’ve always called them hitodama, but I should probably specify they aren’t the only kind of ghostly fireballs! Onibi (demon fire) are often described similarly, and I’m not totally sure what the difference is! I suppose they would be more demonic hence the name, and probably less of a good idea to get close to. Also, if they're made by fox demons, they’re kitsunebi (fox fire)! Isn’t that neat! But there are no foxes to be found here, so F Boy definitely isn’t that (Unless it stands for Fox Boy...?).

However, you might be more familiar with the concept of will-o’-the-wisps, a similiar kind of legend from Europe- in fact, a whole number of cultures around the world have stories of ghostly lights and flames! There’s two explanations for this, either that it is a misunderstanding caused by some chemical reaction (boring, lame) or that hitodama are real and really exist for real (fun, exciting)! I encourage everyone to go outside with a net and catch as many as they can. 

Even though hitodama can be red or orange in some traditional accounts, they’re mostly described as blue and most modern media sticks with that! Which makes it quite weird that F Boy... isn’t! He is a rather fetching orange of course, and without the added context of spooky old Pumpkin Land you wouldn’t be mistaken for thinking he is a lava enemy that just got lost or something! 

Now, moving on to a completely different topic, something else that is great about F Boy is his little cheeks. Have you seen them? Here is the picture one more time in case you forgot after all that. He doesn’t have one in the sprite, so isn’t it quite weird to give a fireball enemy such distinct little cheeks? I want to squeeze them, even if they are probably intangible. 

And finally, we come to the part we’ve all been waiting for- the name! You were thinking it, I was thinking it, it’s probably the only reason I chose to write about him in the first place! Because F Boy is a funny name for an enemy! I think it’s just quite silly to describe a fireball as a “boy” in the first place, as a term of endearment. It is just a boy! A little guy! He’s not hurting anyone! 

But then they add to that name- one letter. That one letter, F. It changes everything. All of a sudden, there’s a question floating in the air- what, pray tell, does the F in F Boy stand for? 

If you’ve been following our blog for a while, you might remember we added an addendum to the original F Boy post, saying the mystery had finally been solved- the English version of the Super Mario Bros. Encyclopedia lists his name as Fireball Boy, which is a pretty definitive answer right?

But since then, it’s been more or less exposed that this translation took a bunch of unsourced and conjectural names from the Mario Wiki, leading to something of a controversy and a Mario Wiki page that is essentially just roasting the whole thing! If even the Wiki doesn’t accept this book as an official source, I wonder if there’s any merit to the name Fireball Boy at all! Either way it’s odd how this is the ONLY name they changed... do they know something we don’t? I dunno! 

My next evidence to present to the court is something that isn’t really related to F Boy at all! Rather, in Super Paper Mario, the Lava Bubble enemy has a tattle that reads the following:

It's a Lava Bubble. This fiery magma boy loves the heat... Max HP is 1 and Attack is 4. Obviously, it's quite immune to fire... It pops out from below when people approach, so take care when jumping over lava...

Fiery magma boy! The chances of this bit of text being intended as a reference are very very slim, but what if, you see? What if? It’s still a fun coincidence, but what if though??

But of course, my favourite possibility is that it isn’t a word related to fire at all and is actually something completely different! I looked up a list of adjectives beginning with F and I’d like to highlight ones I want F Boy to have. Fabulous! Friendly! Faithful. Fantastic. Fascinating! French? Fresh! Fun, and Funky! Faultless. Fetching. Feminist! Festive. Formidable. All these and more describe the complex soul that is F Boy. 

After all is said and done, that is F Boy! Who would’ve thought that a little monochrome fireball enemy from a Game Boy game could have kicked off so many months of writing for this blog? I said in the first paragraph that I would not get too sappy, but now we are in the last one I can be as sappy as I dang well please! This blog has brought me such incredible joy and friendship that you can’t even imagine, and my only hope is that I can convey these feelings to even one person who reads these silly posts. If you are reading this? I hope you have a wonderful day! I hope you have a wonderful life! I hope you never forget to be passionate about the things that really don’t matter at all, because no one else can decide for you what is worth caring about! Mwah! A kiss goodbye. I’m not sure how to end this post. 

#mario #mario enemies #f boy #weird mario all-stars #mod f boy

[greekbros]

"greek-Bros": Rat Tail

*Every god has their secrets....this is the tale of Ares's secret*

Dionysus, Apollo and Hermes: *chatting away about stuff*

Ares: *comes in sort of dancing after a long day of WAAAARRRHHHHH* do do do, de do *takes his helmet off, revealing a slightly long but thin braided rat tail just gently unravel down his shoulder*

Dionysus, Apollo and Hermes: *stop everything and just stare at the literal war crime against humanity that was hiding under Ares's helmet this whole time* (̲̅ ͡ಠ_ಠ)̲̅.......

Ares: *goes over to a fountain to wash up like some homeless dude.*

Dionysus: *raises arm and over dramatically points at Ares*......OH SHIT. A RAT!....tail.

Ares: *turns around nonchalantly* ugh....yeah....yeh guys didn't know?

Apollo: Oh really? Did you HONESTLY think we would even suspect the existence of that........THING?!?

Hermes: Yeah man, I mean... really? A rat tail????

Ares: Ugh...yeah...I mean, it's convenient.

Apollo: SO IS SLAVERY AND GENOCIDE BUT YOU DON'T SEE THOSE BEING PUBLICLY ACCEPTABLE!!!!

Ares: ok I'll bite, why do you guys have such a problem with my hair style?

Apollo: *deeply offended and disgusted by it* oh how do I put it.......ITS FUCKING HORRID.

Dionysus: *personally feeling like Ares could do better with a mullet or something* yeah ugh....looks a little out dated

Hermes: *actually having the insatiable craving to just pluck it right off* ugh...*sweats profusely* .......*does the grabby hand thing and just kinda is mesmerized at the possibility of just easily ripping that tantalizingly thin braided strand like an satisfying ASMR video* ....hhhhnnnnggggg.

Ares: .... First off, fuck off. I ain't getting rid of my "Leonidas's rope". Second, you guys don't understand how hard it is to maintain this look and third off Aphrodite braided it herself so ain't losing that too.

Apollo: Oh there's your accomplice.

Dionysus: I always knew she was an enabler how toxic of her to do so.

Hermes: ....*slowly sneaks closer*

Ares: *slowly backs away.* Screw you guys, I'm going to get a snack. *Covers his rat tail with his hand while he runs off*

Hermes: *like a predator who has been triggered by the running of his prey* must. yank. *

Apollo: *grabs Hermes's collar* no no. I have a plan.

Hermes: *whines* ....but...it would have been so....ﾟ.*･｡ﾟsatisfying ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ

*later*

Ares: *eats his 3rd gryo*

Dionysus: *tries to lasso the rat tail*

Ares: *moves like 3 inches*

Dionysus: *lassos an amphora, pulls the lasso without realizing he has pulled the wrong thing and gets the whole bottle to the face*

Ares: *reaches for the amphora but he notices it's gone.*..........*shrugs and goes get another*

Dionysus: ow.

*later again, in Hephaestus's secret lab*

Apollo: So...do you have any suggestions?

Hermes: *playing with what looks like a stim toy because he got bored* c:

Hephaestus: hmm...yes.... Ares's unfortunate choice of hairstyle is a challenge...but...I do have an idea. *Pulls a rope and a overly complicated Rube Goldberg-esk guillotine the cuts a pumpkin in half* .....

Apollo and Hermes: *both feeling that was WAY too much* ....

Hephaestus: .....

Apollo: ...um... don't you have something a little less..... drastic?

Hephaestus: *lying through his teeth knowing the plan was to at least save his marriage by just killing Ares* ....I apologized dear half-brother...but I'm afraid that is beyond my capabilities.

Apollo and Hermes: *look at each other*

*later*

Ares: *standing in the middle of a platform with ropes and such tied to different places on his body and only the one tied to his rat tail actually does anything*.....are you sure this isn't going to emancipate me for my 'rope'

Hermes: Wut? Oh no of course not, me and Heracles just wanted to do...ugh...an experiment. *Holding on to one rope on a pulley system*

Heracles: *has been brought from his room to harass Ares, holding on to the other*

*later after that failed spectacularly*

Dionysus: *puts a raw steak on his face from earlier* ....so....no plan?

Hermes: no....and I've already satisfied my craving to yank that thing off. Honestly it probably wouldn't have been interesting anyway.

Apollo: *massages his temples* that disgusting, trashy and absolutely repulsive little yarn weff is getting to me.

Dionysus: guys let's be real here ....are we all really going to let Ares's braid really bother us?

Apollo: I REFUSE to relate to another god who wears THAT behind his occipital region of his head.

Ares: *comes in* alright that's it, I'm sick of you guys being so fucking weird about my 'rope' and honestly it's not like you guys have something to hate either! Apollo you and your stupid bowtie on your head makes you look like a poodle! Dionysus I don't know what the shit is going on with your hair so for fuck's sake get a haircut and Hermes.....ugh....YOUR HAT WINGS PISS ME OFF....sort of.

Apollo: *not actually bothered by that comment considering its removable*

Dionysus: *scoff* I see you're jealous of my mane dude.

Hermes: *wings droop* :c

Ares: See? Doesn't fucking suck for someone else t-*hears a snip* .....

Apollo, Dionysus and Hermes: 👁️👄👁️

Artemis: *with a pair of scissors, has just cut the rat tail*...wut?

Ares: *absolutely speechless*......

Apollo: *surprisingly thankful* ARTEMIS! What on earth was that act of mercy for? :D

Artemis: wut? You guys don't have the urge to cut the tails off of rats or anything? Just me? Ok.

Dionysus and Hermes: *wanting to laugh like crazy but slightly feels like Ares is going lose his shit so their just quite*

Ares: *turns around in disbelief* ..........you... little....

Artemis: *unloving gives Ares his rat tail back* whatever Ares, fucking gross looking thing anyways. *Walks away*

Ares: *kneels down in defeat*..........

Apollo: well well well it seems everything is back to normal.

Ares: *sees that Artemis left the scissors, sees only red* .....well....looks like we got to go *picks up the scissors, looks at the trio* BALD.

Apollo, Dionysus and Hermes: *suddenly happy feelings gone.

*later*

Zeus and Hera: *waiting for the Olympians to arrive at the meeting*

Ares: *walks in a fresh buzz cut sits down*

Apollo: *expressionless and with his hair sloppily chopped in various places, looking like it was a home job*....

Dionysus: *slightly similar but he's feeling like a sheered lamb* .....

Hermes: *has a slightly messy version of a buzz cut but there's a really sloppy fade*

Zeus and Hera: *honestly have no idea what happened and look at Ares*

Ares: *has the look of satisfaction on his face*

Apollo: *sits down and slumps over*

Ares: *doesn't even have to turn his head*

Apollo: I hope you choke on those brass balls of yours because I hope you enjoy retaliation.

Ares: Name a place and time and we'll trade hands you pansy.

Apollo: man slut.

Zeus: BOYS!

Apollo: I SEE YOU DO NOT SEE THE ATROCITY YOUR SON HAS COMMITTED!

#greek mythology #greek gods #hellenistic #greek bros #greek myth memes #greek posts #dionysus #ares #Apollo #Zeus #Hermes #Hephaestus

[toothpastecanyon]

Noie’s Brother, Chapter 14

As always, a huge thanks to @feferipeixes​ for beta reading this chapter! Happy ficathon everybody :D

Fate sometimes rhymed, but Alcor felt like this one was a little on the nose. A newborn Mizar fading away in the hospital and a loving father pleading to him from behind a circle of candles.

Fate sometimes rhymed, but Naomi Argenta just wants this stupid vampire to stop harassing her brother. It’s making him go… weird.

See most updated version on Archive of Our Own.

________________________________________________________________

               “Morning, ki… uh, what are you doing? Naomi?”

               Noie jumped back from the blinds and nearly tripped over herself. She gave her grandfather a wide smile, but he just raised an eyebrow.

               “What are you doing?”

               Oh, right. Words. She cleared her throat and said some of them.

               “I am watching the sunset! I mean rise. Or maybe I meant the moonset - why don’t people ever say that? The moon has feelings too!” She barked a laugh. “Hah, I lied, it doesn’t actually! Isn’t that funny!”

               David frowned at the bags under her eyes. “I’m gonna be ticked off if you’ve pulled one of your all-nighters, Naomi. You’ve got school today.”

               “No I haven’t! No I haven’t. Where’s Gramma?”

               “Just coming up behind me… Allie?” He turned, and his face softened to a smile as she shuffled over. “There you are. Morning, honey. You want your tea?”

               “Oh, yes. That’d be lovel-”

               “On it Gramma!” Noie charged across the room to grab the kettle. “Why don’t you guys while you wait go watch TV? That sounds good. That sounds good.”

               “I was more thinking we were gonna do a proper sit-down breakfast. You know, I feel like Allie and I, we haven’t seen you kids all that much this past week-”

               “Don’t go outside!”

               That was snapped at Allie, who’d pulled out a chair by the back door. She jumped, and David immediately rounded on Noie.

               “Hey! Don’t you ever use that tone on your grandmother, young lady!”

               “Sorry.”

               “Don’t apologise to me, apologise to Allie!”

               Noie looked to her grandmother, who had turned and was now staring at the back door. She cringed. “Sorry, Gramma. Didn’t mean to yell at… you? Gramma?”

               “Was I going to…?” The kettle was starting to rumble as Allie looked back at her. “Outside?”

               “Huh?”

               “I was going to… go see, go meet someone…” She reached out to the door handle. “I need to-”

               “No!”

               “Naomi Argenta!”

               Noie raced around her grandfather to cut Allie off. “Um-!”

               “I just told you not to yell at Allie like that! What’s gotten into you!”

               “I wasn’t yelling, I just needed to-”

               “Don’t talk back to me!” David marched over to her. “Let her go outside if she wants to!”

               “But-”

               “She’s an adult, she can do what she wants-” He grabbed her hand. “You, on the other hand-”

               Noie pulled away, kept blocking the door. “No!”

               “Excuse me?”

               The look on his face made her squirm, but she shook her head. “No! I’m staying here!”

               “Naomi Faybelle Ar-”

               “No!”

               “Stop that now.” David grabbed her arm. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you but I don’t like it and I want it to stop right now. Let’s have a talk, kid. Come on.” He yanked at her. “I said come on!”

               “No! I said I’m staying here so just fucking listen to me for once in your life!” Noie shoved his hand away. “Why don’t you leave me alone and stop acting like you’re my father!”

               For one terrible second, it was silent. Noie could hear the kettle shut off with a click. Her grandfather staggered back, and the expression he was wearing… she tried to clench her fists.

               “I just want you to leave me alone. That’s what you do most of the time anyways, so why don’t you just go and watch some stupid TV show and butt out?” She couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore. “That’s what you’re best at.”

               David Argenta didn’t say a word. From the corner of her eye, she could see him trying; she could see his jaw clench, his face redden, his throat tighten…

               “David?” Said his wife.

               ...But in the end, the most he could muster was a thick, “C’mon, Allie,” as he led her out of the room. Noie watched the floor as they shuffled away, and left her alone in the kitchen.

               A movement on the porch. Noie didn’t have to look up to see Lucy Ann tapping on the glass beside her. The soundproofing wards were working perfectly, but she didn’t have to hear her to know she was saying, “You’re making a mistake.”

               With a hard swallow, Noie pushed herself off the door and went to fetch Dipper.

               She tried not to notice that the TV had just been switched on.

               Their bedroom was dark when she slipped in. The sun glowed against the blinds, illuminating the room just enough to reveal a gleaming liquid dripping from the bottom bunk.

               “Dipper?” Noie’s heart skipped a beat when he didn’t so much as groan. “Dipper!”

               He was breathing… just barely. Whatever was dripping from him - it looked too golden to be blood, but seeing it bleed from his nose made her unsure - was smeared all over his pillow and soaked into his sheets. Most of it seemed to come from the small of his back; there was a huge dark spot there… and a strange pair of bumps in the blanket that were too far up to be his legs.

               Noie bit her lip, hard. Dipper groaned and reached for her, and she took his hand, squeezed it… and peeled back the blanket, revealing the dark wings that had erupted out of her brother’s back.

               She watched them twitch for a second, then promptly covered them up again and tapped his shoulder.

               “Hey, Dipper. Dipper.” She stared at his face. Only at his face. “Dipper, you gotta get up. Come on.”

               “Mmmph… Mabel…”

               “Noie. I’m Noie, I’m your sister.”

               “I… know that.” With difficulty, he opened his eyes. The golden irises made her shiver. “I know… things. I saw, in dreams, who you are… a-and…”

               Dipper groaned and squeezed her arm. She tried to pull him into a hug, tried to shield him from his pain, to hide him away from a world that was trying to tear him apart.

               Into her shoulder, he mumbled, “I saw the things… I’ve done…”

               “Shh. They’re just dreams.”

               “No, N-Noie, I-I don’t… I don’t think I’m just this. Just human.”

               “That doesn’t make any sense.”

               “It does, I… I see it…” He gripped her tighter. “I feel like… like I’m waking up. Like I’m dreaming now, and I’m waking up, a-and I can’t stop it-”

               “Calm down. You’re fine.”

               “I’m scared.”

               Noie felt him sob into her shirt. She looked down, at the pair of wings twitching out of his blankets, still glistening with golden blood. She clutched him tighter, and somehow, though the knot in her throat, she managed to say something.

               “I’m scared too.” That hung between them for a moment, and she shut her eyes tight. “But it’s going to be okay. It’s going to be okay.”

               “Noie-”

               “Look, Dipper, I-I’ve made… a doctor’s appointment, okay?” She pulled back from him a bit. “He’s going to fix everything. He’s going to put everything back to normal.”

               Dipper tried to frown. “I don’t… think I’m norm-”

               “No. You’re not normal right now.” Noie eyed his wings. “You’re not well. But you’ll get better, okay? I promise.”

               “Noie?”

               She rose to her feet. “Please, trust me. You can trust me, right?”

               “O-of course-”

               “So come on.” Gently, she tugged his hands. “Let me help you up, bro.”

               Dipper didn’t get to his feet very easily. He wobbled under his own weight, and clutched at her with his claws (she tried not to let on how much they stung - he probably didn’t realise). Noie wrapped a blanket around his shivering form and half-carried him into the kitchen; setting him down on a chair, she glanced outside.

               There was a car idling on the driveway. She knew she needed to get Dipper in there. How she knew… was a question she set aside for later, because there was also the figure of a vampire between her and the car she needed to get Dipper into. Lucy Ann had spotted the blinds moving and came running over; she banged on the glass and shook her head, motioned her to come outside, shouted words that looked just like ‘Listen to me-!’

               Noie stepped back, and bit her lip as she glanced at Dipper. After a moment of hesitation, she darted towards the kitchen, picked up the pumpkin seeds and the garlic. Quickly, she diced up the garlic cloves and put them in a bowl, wrinkling her nose at the harsh smell. She took them over to Dipper, and put them into his hands.

               “Here.” She spoke gently. “Hold this, Dipper. Now let me help you up.”

               He was just a little steadier this time, and Noie guided him over to the door. It loomed before her; she thought of everything that could go wrong, everything he might hear, every mistake she might make after she opened it and took him out into the world… but no. She shook her head to clear it, and took a deep breath to steady herself.

               There was no point worrying. There was no going back. There was no making mistakes - not here, not now, not with Dipper’s life on the line.

               Noie tore open the packet of seeds with her teeth.

               She was going to be perfect.

               And with that, she opened the door and shoved Dipper into the light. He stumbled a little, and Noie caught him just as she locked eyes with Lucy Ann. The vampire looked surprised at the sight of her brother; she took that opportunity to scatter a pile of seeds at her feet and push Dipper onwards.

               “Wha- hey!” Lucy Ann managed a half-step forwards before being compelled to bend down and pick up all the seeds. “Alcor! Alcor, don’t trust her! It’s me!”

               “Lucy Ann?” Dipper tried to glance back, but Noie didn’t let him.

               “Ignore her. Just keep moving.”

               “No, wait! Where are you going? Noie, where are you taking him?”

               “Just ignore, just ignore…”

               Lucy Ann shook her head as they approached the car. “No no no - A-Alcor, she’s working with the angel! You’re a demon, you gotta remember that! You gotta wake up!”

               “He’s not a demon!” Noie helped Dipper into the car. “You’re not a demon,” she told him, and shut the door.

               “Noie-!”

               “He’s not a demon!” Noie saw she was almost done picking up the seeds, and pointed a finger at her. “Please, just stay there, okay! It’s for your safety too.”

               “Listen to me! The angel knows he’s a demon-”

               She walked around the car.

               “-literally an omniscient being, he’s lying to you!”

               She opened the back door.

               “Noie, he doesn’t want to help Dipper! You gotta listen to me! Please, just-”

               And slammed it shut. Once she was inside, the driver started the car.

                               That was far from a perfect method, Noie heard. She rolled her eyes.

               “I got him in, didn’t I?”

               The angel guided them onto the roads without a response. Dipper moaned, and she pushed aside that frustration to check on him.

               “Dipper? Hey, bro, you okay?”

               He descended into a hacking fit, and curled in on himself with every cough. Reddish golden flecks splattered into the footwell and ran from his open mouth; Noie patted her pants for a tissue, but she had nothing for him.

               “Dipper…”

               “L-L-Lu-cy-” He managed. She shook her head.

               “No, shh-”

               “Lu-cy Ann, she-was… was t-there.” He spread his clammy hands, stared down at the claws tipping them. “Said I-I was a-”

               “No. No, you’re not.” Noie covered his fingers. “You’re sick, Dipper. You’re not thinking straight. Just hang on for a little longer, and we’ll get you fixed up, okay? Trust me.”

               He slumped against her, and she put an arm around him.

               “Just trust me,” she murmured. “I love you, Dipper. I’d never let anything happen to you.”

               “I lo̻v̘͇ͅe̸̮̭̯ͅ… I̹̮-̥̤̠͚ͅI̡̭̟͙̦̬-”

               Dipper dissolved into another bout of coughing, and Noie tried to ignore the eerie echo it had picked up. She tried to ignore the blood getting on her legs, the wings shuddering against her side.

               She held him tight, stared forwards, and tried to ignore it all.

               “M͍̼i̥z̻a̶̩̳r̸͙̺.̮.̣̗̰̯͇͎.̦̘̥̬̬”

               Rubbed his back, and tried to hold on until

                               We are here.

               Noie didn’t even notice she’d gotten up until she found herself helping Dipper out of the car. They were at a gas station - she registered it as the one at the end of their block - and the entrance beckoned her. The windows seemed to glow with a strange energy, backlighting a ‘HELP WANTED’ sign hung in front of the door, and she started forwards-

               But Dipper held back. Even when she pulled at him, he stayed put, and a growling noise emanated from his throat.

               She looked around for the angel, but…

                               This is your burden, child. As you have done for many mornings now, you must lead him to me.

               Noie heard that, and stretched a smile. She turned back to her brother, and tugged his arm again.

               “Come on, Dipper. It’s safe, I promise.” Slowly, she coaxed him forwards. “I promise.”

               After a long hesitation, Dipper let her lead him off the tarmac. He hesitated once again as they approached the doors; his lip curled - flashing actual fangs - and she had to stop again to convince him to come just a little closer, to stay with her for just a little longer…

               “Wait…”

               It was faint at first, but it quickly got loud, and made Noie’s stomach drop.

               “Wait!”

               It was Lucy Ann. Fuck, it was Lucy Ann. She sped down the street as fast as her legs could take her, red cloak whipping behind her in a blur. Noie tried to jerk Dipper into the store, but he stayed put - and that was all the time she got before the vampire caught up.

               “Wait!” Lucy Ann tried to reach for Dipper’s hand, but flinched away from Noie. “What are you doing in there?!”

               “Uhh… shopping?”

               “No you’re not, the entire fucking store is glowing!” She moved to cut Noie off. “Alcor, you’re in danger - we both are. You gotta come with me now.”

               Noie glared at her. “Come with you? Uh, no. Absolutely not. He’s sick, I’m taking him in there so I can fix him.”

               “Oh, am I talking to Noie, or Mr Angel right now?” They circled each other. “Honestly can’t tell.”

               “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

               “No, you don’t, you have no idea. Alcor!”

               “He’s Dipper!”

               “Lucy Ann…?”

               Noie’s brother’s thin voice made her freeze, and in that moment Lucy Ann lunged for him. She grabbed his arm and started to pu-

               “Aaaarghhh!”

               Noie heard her scream.

               Heard the sizzle of her skin burning into ash.

               Heard her keep screaming, keep crying out in agony-

                               Because Noie’s hand was wrapped around its wrist and wouldn’t let go.

               “Argh- let go, let g -aaah!”

                               “Ancient One. You were meant to be dust long ago.” The hand tightened. “Unto dust you shall return.”

               “Alcor! Alcor! Alcor!”

                               Alcor… The angel drew back to assess the demon, and Noie whipped her hand back with wide eyes, clutching it like it was going to snake out and attack Lucy Ann again. She looked down at the vampire, and her heart stopped at the crumpled heap that lay before her.

               “Lucy Ann?”

               A choking sob was all that answered her. Lucy Ann cradled her smoking wrist, and there was the awful shine of bone beneath all that crumbling ash… for a moment, she couldn’t tear her eyes away.

                               Go inside.

               And then she blinked, and-

                               You are neglecting your brother.

               Noie’s head snapped over to Dipper, and she saw him staring down at the vampire with something scarily close to recognition. With shaking hands she grabbed him and jerked him forwards.

               “Mizar-”

               “Noie.” She hissed. “It’s Noie. Now come on.”

               “What did you do to-”

               “Come on.”

               “But Lucy A-”

               “Shut up! Shut up, okay!” She yanked him away from the vampire. “I’ve done everything today because I want you to get better! That’s good! I’m good! You need to fucking trust me on this because I love you and I don’t want you to die!”

               Dipper just stared at her, stunned. She glowered back at him.

               “What, do you want to die? Do you want to leave me? Is that what this is?!”

               “No! No, I-”

               “Then follow.”

               She turned and marched into the store, and finally, there was no resistance from Dipper.

                  Through the doors they went.

                     Into the light.

               “Noie?”

               She had a piece of chalk in her hand. On the floor, she traced a perfect circle around Dipper; when he moved, she kept him back.

               “No, you gotta stay there, bro. Trust me.”

               Noie drew symbols she didn’t understand, lined the edge of the circle with laser precision a strange language that she couldn’t decipher. It began to glow a yellow-gold - the same colour as the wide-eyed stare Dipper was giving her now.

               “Noie?” He tried to reach out, but the light converged and blocked his hand from leaving the circle. “What is this?”

               “It’s okay.” She placed candles at each point of the star she’d drawn in the centre. “It’s nearly done. There’s just one more thing I need to do.”

                               Just one more thing, said the angel, and now she was holding something in her hand. Just one more thing, child, and all will be back to normal.

                               All will be as it was meant to be.

               Noie looked down, saw the knife in her hands… and didn’t quite understand, at first.

               “Huh?”

                               You’ve done so well thus far. I am proud to call you my friend. Now, be brave.

               “But… But I don’t understand.” Noie held it up to the light. “What am I supposed to do with this?”

                               You are to save humanity,

               The light fell upon the boy in the circle.

                               by sacrificing its most existential threat.

               Noie felt a cold dread come over her. Behind the shining blade, she watched her brother take a step back.

               “Noie?”

               She lowered the knife. “Y-you told me you were going to help him,” she said, with a voice that trembled. “He’s possessed, you were going to fix him. Not - this.”

                               And I did not lie to you. This body the Dreambender has cloaked himself in is possessed by him, and I shall fix that.

               “B-but you’re trying to kill him!”

               “Noie, what’s going on?”

                               Yes, I intended from the beginning to kill this demon, and return your life to normal. The angel’s words were cold, clinical, chilling. It is no fault of mine that Dipper Argenta was never meant to exist in the first place. To return him to normal is to wipe him from existence, and that is what must be done, therefore that is what shall be done. Do it.

               “No!”

                               Child, I understand the reasons for my omissions may be hard to understand, but-

               “No!” Noie threw the knife down. “No, absolutely not! I would never-”

                               But you will.

               A surge of pain. Noie gasped and dropped to her knees, her vision flashing with blinding light.

                               I forgive you this anger. I was not expecting a mortal such as you to understand the opportunity I was presented with here: a demon who has willfully chained itself to human form.

               It felt like her skeleton was trying to force its way out of her body. Her hand reached out even though she struggled to bring it back, grasped the knife even though she fought to let it go. The angel was too rooted inside her to resist, his presence in every muscle, every tendon, every cell in her body.

                               You came so far. You helped me so greatly up to this point. I truly am saddened that you chose to turn against me now; just know that when this is all done, you will thank me for the peaceful world I deliver to you.

                               And maybe then, we can be as friends again. I would like that.

               “Noie?” Dipper staggered back, fell against the binding circle. “Y-your eyes… what’s going on?!”

                               But for now, you are Mizar, and I need you for this last step.

               “Noie! Noie, snap out of it!”

                               This last sacrifice.

               “Noie, please say something, please…”

               Noie couldn’t look away - she didn’t have the power to blink.

               She could only watch as she stepped into the binding circle and slit her brother’s throat.

               The blood on her hands was warm and golden. The look in his eyes was wild and terrified.

               She could only watch as she pushed him back, and stepped out of the circle.

               She could only watch.

               She could only watch.

               Dipper crumpled. His hands grasped at his throat, and blood soaked them as he gasped for breath. His whole body seemed to be disintegrating before her eyes; skin sloughed off his form, his limbs twisted, his head split and slopped into a pile of bone and tissue and broken sobbing.

               And still the angel wasn’t done. She could only watch as her mouth opened, and her voice rang out with an otherworldly language that seemed to hurt him still further, breaking him down to a moaning, bloody slurry, that dried up like a puddle in the sunlight…

               And god, she could only watch.

Bang.

               A sudden noise startled the angel, and Noie saw a flash of red barrel towards the circle. She didn’t know what it was, but panic flooded the angel.

               “No!” The angel stepped her forwards, but Lucy Ann, clutching the ‘HELP WANTED’ sign from outside, dove for the chalk circle and rubbed a huge hole in it.

               The enchantment broke - the golden glow faded… and whatever remained of Dipper Argenta darkened to a shadowy void.

               “Alcor!” Lucy Ann was laughing with relief as Noie backed up. “You’re back, you’re back, thank god.”

               The only answer she got was a growl that shook the very foundations of the building. The void rose up, and two slitted yellow eyes opened and fixed on Noie.

“M͟҉̷̢̝͚͇̜̼I͜͏̡̛̥̫̙͕̯̙͕̗̳͕̜̘N̸̷͓͉̻̺͚̟̮͝E̡̛̥̹̹̺̺̱͎͚̝̪̞̩̗̻͜!̨̻̫̥̲͇̜̫̣̘͓̞̺͓̦̝͍͜͞͠”

               Noie could only watch as Alcor the Dreambender lunged for her.

               He pinned her to the floor, knocking the breath out of her, and she could only stare up at the eyes of a demon - she saw nothing of her brother. Nothing, and when he plunged his claws into her stomach she screamed with what she thought would be her last breath on this Earth-

               And watched him pull the angel from her body. It came out like a pure white light that hurt her eyes, and she spasmed as its hooks were ripped from every muscle in her body.

               Noie was under her own control again, and she gasped for breath, scampered away from Alcor as he gave a furious roar. She watched with bulging eyes as the demon bit and tore at the angel, made it scream with terror; after gashing it limb from limb, he unhinged his jaw and devoured it from existence.

               When that was done, he fixed those terrible eyes on her once more, and rumbled out, “M͏̨̞̺̗͇̯͎̖̫̮͚̻͈͔̼̹̬̭͝i̵̭̼̺͎͚̜̣͎̯̲̫͠n͏̧̮̘̬͉͓͎͖̰̤̳̠̤̫͈̟͈̳e̝͖̩̥̬̪̠͍̮̟͕͖̞̻̫̖̞͢͡ͅ.̸̸̶̴̢̼͚̟̫.”

               Noie pressed herself into the far wall. “D-Dipper?”

“You are m͏̥̹̮̹̻i͇̩̪͚̩͇͇͢n̶̩͖̮͇͍̱͔͍̕e̱͝. M̸̡̱̬̯̥̺͚̳̩̰i̷͏̹̬̹ṉ̩̹̖͍̪̟̟͝e̩̦.̶̺̠͜ ͏̟̗̺͖̪̻͢M̢̠͈͘͠i̢̲̳̱̜̭̺̰̬n̷̛̹̜͈̮͖e̦͙̭͚̥̭…”

               “Hey, Alcor.”

               A voice. Lucy Ann’s voice. The vampire walked up to the shadowy demon with unnerving ease.

               “Chill it with the mines - I think you’re freaking her out there.”

               Alcor’s head whipped around, and he hissed at her. “S̻̦̱͘̕h̹̰̙ḛ̵̻̪͟ ̸̲̼͕̖̙̱̯̱i̥̦̤͜s̬͖͘ ̱̻̻̳͚̦͇̖̞͘m͏̡̹̻̻͓̺̫͝ị͙͉̝̜͓̝̕͝n̛̺̱̖̙͟ę̮̦͜.”

               “Hearing you loud and clear.” Lucy Ann actually touched him; she patted his arm. “Come on, big guy, you like, fully murderised that angel - thank god. You can come out of scary demon mode now.”

               Noie closed her eyes, prayed she wasn’t going to see another murder take place right in front of her… but in the darkness, she heard the growling fade.

               “Lucy Ann?”

               “There he is. Hey, Al.”

               “Lucy Ann!”

               “Heh- argh! Not so hard with the hugging!”

               “Oh, sorry!”

               Noie squeezed an eye open just in time to see Alcor set Lucy Ann down. Colour had returned to his form, but he looked far older than Dipper - far taller, and wearing a suit and a gingerly expression as he noticed the vampire’s arm.

               She didn’t recognise him at all.

               “Lucy Ann… what happened to you?”

               “That fucking angel’s what’s happened to me.” Lucy Ann drew back when he tried to touch the burn. “And you running off to play human again - what the hell, Alcor?! You said you were gonna tell me if you pulled this shit again!”

               Alcor cringed. “I’m sorry.”

               “Yeah, you better be.”

               “I am. I should’ve let you know, a-and I should’ve thought up of some way for you to contact me if you were in trouble… I wasn’t thinking.”

               “You sure weren’t.” Lucy Ann pulled him into a one-armed hug. “Well, it’s good to see a friendly face. Thanks for getting rid of that thing, dude.”

               “No, thank you. Thank you so much for saving me from him, that was…” He shuddered. “Unpleasant. Ugh, angels.”

               “You can say that again.”

               “Ugh, angels,” he repeated, and they both laughed a bit at that. He motioned to her arm. “Hey, uh, let me fix that up for you. “

               “You sure? I don’t have anything for that sorta deal right now.”

               “Don’t worry. I can do it, I think.” He chuckled nervously. “I kinda owe you big time for all this, anyway.”

               Alcor touched the burn, and a blue fire encircled Lucy Ann’s arm for a moment before vanishing in a puff of smoke, leaving unbroken skin behind. The relief in Lucy Ann’s expression was palpable.

               “Oh, you’re a pal.” She sighed, rubbing her wrist. “Fuck, that was killing me.”

               He put his arm around her. “I bet it was… I, um, I’m glad you’re okay.”

               “I’m glad I’m okay, too.” She leaned into him. “And you or whatever, I guess I care about you.”

               “That’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me in centuries.”

               “Heh. Don’t get used to it.”

               “Oh, I wouldn’t dare.”

               The two of them just held each other for a moment, and finally, it was quiet. Peaceful.

               For Noie, unbearable. Because that was her brother right there.

               Her brother, the demon.

               She tried once to get to her feet, but her muscles gave out. She tried again, and stumbled forwards, drawing both of their eyes.

               Drawing his eyes. They weren’t Dipper Argenta’s brown; it was the same black-on-gold gaze she’d learned to fear, and she could feel her skin crawling at the sight of it now. She saw those eyes widen, saw him stagger back, and she tried to speak.

               “D-Dipper-?” Noie managed. “Is that…? A-are you really…?”

               Lucy Ann crossed her arms. “I’m not allowed to say I told you so, am I.” She looked back. “Uh, Al?”

               Alcor had gone sheet white; he looked horrified, and he just shook his head, kept shaking his head, kept backing up.

               “Dipper?” Shakily, Noie got to her feet. “You’re still Dipper, r-right?”

               She reached out for him… and in the blink of an eye he tessered away, leaving something to drop to the floor where he’d stood. Noie blinked.

               “Dipper?” Her heart stopped. “No no, Dipper! Come back!”

               Noie rushed over to where he’d been, and picked up the thing he’d dropped.

               It was a USB drive. An unmarked grey USB drive, and her shaking fingers fumbled with it.

               “What…?” Noie staggered up and looked around. “Dipper! Dipper!”

               But all she saw were trashed shelves, and burned walls, and a vampire trying not to look in her direction. Dipper was nowhere, and when she closed her eyes she saw the demon lunging for her, she saw the demon’s awful gaze pinning her to the floor, she saw the demon plunging its claws into her and ripping, and ripping… Oh, god, she couldn’t stop seeing it.

               There was blood under her fingernails. There was so much blood here, and Dipper was gone.

               “...Noie. Noie.” Faintly, she became aware of Lucy Ann’s voice washing over her. “Um, I’m sure your brother’ll be back soon. Don’t freak out, okay?”

               She stared past Lucy Ann’s awkward grin, past her hands fingering with the ‘HELP WANTED’ sign.

               “That was probably a lot for you to take in… uh, how’s about we get out of this place? How’s about I walk you home?” She chuckled nervously. “I’m kinda in this building on a technicality, so I’m ready to go.”

               Lucy Ann walked past Noie, and she just kept staring. Staring at the spot where the demon disappeared. She fingered the USB in her pocket, and saw again how the horror swept over its face at the sight of her.

               At the sight of her.

               “Noie, you coming?”

               What on Earth did he see?

#transcendence au #Noie #dipper #Noie's Brother #lucy ann #body horror #toothwrites

[theshinobiway]

Mobile FAQ

Welcome to the Blog!

Before you submit a request, please keep in mind the following:

✫Who are the Mods?

This Blog is managed by one mod (Pumpkin) as of right now. Headcanons will not take very long, but scenarios might! I try to have things done within a few weeks of their submission, but if life happens I’ll post about it on the blog to keep you updated.

✫Do you do Reader-Insert?

Reader insert HCs and Scenarios allowed! Please specify pronouns/race when submitting a request if you desire, otherwise HCs/Scenarios will be Gender Neutral. If I ever use a specific pronoun (Usually because it makes the prose flow better) always feel free to request a different version utilizing a new pronoun.

✫Are LGBT Requests Allowed?

Very LGBTQ+ Friendly! I am Bisexual myself and use She/Her pronouns. If I am not informed enough to feel comfortable writing a specific paring/identity, I will make a post requesting more information. Additionally, my messages are always open. If you want to offer your assistance with your request, simply send me a message and I’ll work through it with you. If your request is anonymous, I will make sure to keep your blog’s identity private.

✫Do you do Shipping Requests?

I do not do character x character HCs and scenarios. I don’t personally ship any of team Gai with any other character, and I don’t want to delve into the Tumblr shipping community. Please do not send me requests for ships, I will delete them.

✫Are Pre-Shippuden/Kid requests allowed?

I will do Genin/Academy team Gai! Crushes allowed for this age, but all true romance HCs will be reserved for Shippuden-aged Team Gai. (Might Gai is obviously exempt from this rule.)

✫Do you allow NSFW content?

NSFW is allowed, but keep in mind that characters for these will always be 18+.

Please do not submit NSFW requests unless you are 18+.

✫Can I request a character doing x/y/z unsavory thing?

It’s officially canon™ that none of the members of team Gai engage in pedophilia, non-con, abuse, neglect, etc. I won’t write scenarios that include them doing these!

Part I Neji’s calloused treatment of Hinata and early cold demeanor towards his team which was shown in brief in the anime, but Pre-Exams Neji would not engage in the systematic abuse of any other character. Genin!Neji would verbally put down other characters, threaten/belittle them if they pressed on his insecurities, or give them a swift but impersonal beat-down if they challenged him. His murderous anger would only be reserved for the main branch (or enemy-nin), and only exuded in situations that are within the rules and guidelines. Instances of his anger outside of this would be shut down by Gai or by having his curse seal activated. Remember that Genin!Neji is still a 13/14 year old boy with anger issues and trauma. He is, at worst, a teenage bully who might take things a little too far.

✫Can I request scenarios that involve abuse/disorders/violence?

Yes, but keep in mind all HCs/Scenarios that involve readers coping with abuse/disorders/unsavory events will be summarily labeled, excessively tagged, and hidden beneath cuts. These requests may be pushed back in favor of others because they will take longer to write.

✫Why do “High-Risk” content requests take so much longer?

HCs/Scenarios that involve characters/readers coping with abuse/disorders/violence will take much longer. I will not write about something I have not done research on, so please be patient! I want to be sure that I avoid harmful portrayals or stereotypes. I know fictional HCs/Scenarios can be therapeutic and provide escapism, so I want to handle these requests with care to keep the environment of this blog welcoming and friendly for everyone who loves team Gai.

Helpful Tip: Send me a second ask/DM that mentions your request and some pointers or specific things you would like me to touch on/avoid in your request. This will be very informative for me and will speed up the time it takes for me to write! Plus, it’ll be anonymous!

About Me:

Name: Pumpkin (She/Her)

Age: 24 (I’m an adult, so minors please keep this in mind!)

Loves: Pumpkins, Coffee, Team Gai.

Dislikes: OLIVES.

Favorite Character: Neji. I always go for characters with emotional depth and he has so much of it. Also, Hyuga politics are incredibly compelling and should have had their own arc in the series. I am not a fan of how his arc ended overall and I have complaints about Naruto’s talk-no-jutsu in the chunin arc (because it didn’t actually address Neji’s major problems), but overall I find that Neji is a character with the perfect balance of strengths, flaws, motivations, and his stoicism is balanced by his good heart. 

Lee is a very close second, followed by Tenten and Gai who are tied for a close third.

Least Favorite Character: Sasuke. While not technically my “least” favorite, I find the Uchiha as a whole to be extremely…boring. Sasuke’s character and motivations weren’t very compelling or consistent (and while inconsistency is pretty human he isn’t humanized well) and the last arc did not do him justice and did not fully redeem him. 

I’m also not a fan of how he turned out in the epilogue. In general, he wasn’t handled well as a character. As a main character for the series, I felt like I was always expecting more. I dislike him because of the inconsistent writing, but I do believe he had potential.

Favorite Ships: Naruhina. Naruto has someone who literally only wishes for his happiness and success, Hinata has the support and affirmation she’s always looked for. They have a very sweet and fluffy dynamic, and their characters are almost perfect compliments for one another.

While the series failed to do them justice, “The Last” as a standalone arc for them was lovely and should have been inserted in the actual series, preferably sometime before the last war arc. I really wish they had more in the series to further their relationship.

Least Favorite Ships: Oh boy. I do not ship NejiTen or LeeTen and I oppose both ships. 

I ship Tenten only with herself. In the shinden novels it’s mentioned that Tenten has never had any romantic goals. A major character development piece is her finally coming to terms with the fact that she’s fine being as she is without the societal pressure of having to marry or pursue romance. Shipping her with anyone is a huge disservice to her character and a core part of her identity, and disregards a major part of her personality. Also read: it’s OOC.

Tenten’s bro-ship with her teammates is golden and a wonderful portrayal of how guy/girl friendships can be extremely deep and comfortable while still being platonic. That needs representation!

Additionally, neither ship has a real foundation. With the exception of Chouji/Karui, all romantic connections were stated explicitly in the anime/manga OR in the Gaiden novels (Chouji/Karui was alluded to in Sakura Hiden.) Tenten, when she IS in Konoha Gaiden, explicitly mentions she is disinterested in romance. This is consistent with her character and a perfectly acceptable choice for her narrative, which is why I support it.

Neji and Tenten only bond over being too mature for Gai/Lee shenanigans and training together when Lee/Gai are off. In the Chunin arc she comments that both Sasuke and Kakashi are cute, but makes no mention of Neji aside from her admiration of his abilities. Neji comments on her abilities as well during her fight with Temari, but Lee is the one who gives her open support. Their relationship is shown as friendly, but is strictly a Nakama bond. Most of their interaction in the Chunin exams is related to, or entirely revolves around the absence of Lee. There are no allusions to their relationship, even as a joke. In a shounen anime, romance is almost always explicitly mentioned or alluded to. In Naruto, this was also true for virtually all pairings and love triangles. Neji and Tenten never had this. Any development is purely-fan made or fan-imagined.

I especially dislike this pairing because from a narrative/storytelling standpoint and the way they are characterized, they do not (and would not) contribute to the other's personal development in any significant fashion. Tenten trained with Neji in the Chunin exams for two reasons; her abilities were most suited for training Kaiten, and she was his teammate--therefore the only reasonable choice to secretly practice a technique that Neji was not supposed to learn. She was his primary supporter in the stands because she trained with him and Lee/Gai were both absent to also comment on Neji. Even though Kishi made a lot of questionable choices when it came to romance, not having Neji and Tenten together was not one of them. It made perfect sense for both characters to work together when necessary, but they have zero shared themes or development arcs. The only one, "Getting stronger," is a Team Gai-wide theme.

Even if Tenten was given more personal development in the series, her development would have revolved around herself and the development of her own abilities as a shinobi. She was never a character that was meant for romance. And it's perfectly fine for her to be that way.

Lee and Tenten have more personal interactions and far more relationship building moments in both canon and fillers, but they especially don’t have romantic chemistry--more brother/sister. They are confirmed as not together in Boruto for this very reason. They are fiercely supportive of one another and a fantastic duo. This does not mean they need a romance, either.

Feel free to ship who you like, but please do not request character x character on this blog, the request will be summarily deleted. This is not a shipping blog, but there are others out there that can cater to your needs. Thank you!

#Pumpkintalks #pumpkin talks #FAQ #I keep forgetting not everyone regularly uses desktop #obvi I have to for writing purposes #my b #the shinobi way #TheShinobiWay

[ftafp]

Myth Anomalies: Undead or Fey

The thing that initially made me want to post about mythology has been strange trend I’ve noticed over the year with regards to a group of mythical creatures who seem stuck between two very distinct categories of monster. Specifically there is a bizarrely large number creatures who seem to blur the thick lines between Fairy and Undead, and the most well known of these cases in the Banshee

In modern pop culture anyone and their mother can tell you what a banshee is. It’s a ghostly woman whose ghastly shriek either foretells death or causes it for all who hear it. What most people, (including the one person I expected to know) don’t realize is that while contemporary Banshee are undead, in their celtic origins they are explicit fairies.

This isn’t some random old source that nobody took seriously. The name banshee (or bænsidhe) literally translates to “Woman of the fairies.” And even more curiously, she’s not the only one affected by this. In fact, she’s not even the only case from irish mythology (although seeing as irish fey are sort of the archetype it’s not all that surprising that they hold the record)

Pictured above is the Headless Horseman, who is about one can get to the Halloween version equivalent of Santa Claus (excluding Jack-o’-Lantern, but more on that soon). In American folklore he is known as a poultergeist of a revolutionary war mercenary who lost his head to a canon ball and now haunts rural new york carrying a pumpkin around as a replacement. While The Legend Of Sleepy Hollow popularized this figure as a form of undead, his origin was as, you guessed it, an irish fairy who was actually a lot like the banshee.

Like the Banshee, the Dullahan (or as it’s known to weeaboos, Durarara™) is a cryptic and unsightly fairy whose purpose was either to foreshadow or sew death with his presence. Unlike the one who attacked Ichabod Crane (that was just some churlish vintage bro with a pumpkin), the Dullahan had a number of properties that marked it’s unnatural and disturbing nature, such as the rotten head it carried around or the whip made from its own spinal cord. Also the horse’s head was bigger than its body so good luck telling me how it got off the ground. It also has an even creepier brother who never made it big enough to be considered undead. from the islands of northern scotland comes the skinless horseman, the Nuckelavee, who looks like what would happen the colossal titan got hot and steamy with some sweet, sweet centaur ass (note: if you have a weak constitution don’t google it. just watch RWBY Season 4 for a toned down version)

Neither of these were truly considered undead at the time they were created, but through Richard Dawkin’s theory of Memetic evolution they have become undead to adapt to a society that is no longer intimidated by fairies. However, in some cases, this exact process has played on in reverse. Take for example the Will-O’-Wisp

Most people see these little globes of light as fireflies without the fly. While some may consider them “fairy lights” the fact of this matter is that Will-O’-Wisps get a bit spookier when we look at that buddy I told you we’d get back to. You see, Will-O’-Wisps were originally called Jack-O’-Lanterns, and their origin story is the reason “Tricking” is a valid alternative to candy.

As follows its mirror image the headless horseman, who started as a race of fairies but became an individual undead, the Jack-O’-Lanterns started off as an individual undead but became a race of fairies. Legend goes that a devious and clever moocher by the name of Stingy Jack proved such a sly bastard that the Devil himself decided to make his acquaintance. When the two met in a bar, Jack talked old scratch into turning himself into a coin so he could scam the hapless waitress into giving him his fill of beer. Once transformed however, Jack stuck the coin into his pocket next to a small cross, preventing the devil from changing back. Basically the guy held the devil hostage until he agreed not to take Jack’s soul when he died, but when that day came even purgatory barred its gates to him, so the devil gave him a lantern and made him fuck off back to earth, where to this day he still pulls tricks by guiding marsh-wanderers into leech-filled bogs

Of course, this trend is not limited to celtic mythology, though given that the word “fairy” tends to only be applied to celtic and germanic spirits we’re going to need an extended definition to see just how global this phenomenon is, so let’s head east across eurasia until we find their middle-eastern counterpart, the djinn, or as they’re more commonly known, Genies

(I wanted to use Robin Williams here but I just couldn’t do that)

See, while we never really make the comparison, the genies of middle eastern myth (djinn, ifrit, marids, divs and ghüls) have all the characteristics of fairies. They’re tricky, magical, intelligent, but are explicitly not infernal in nature, instead being individuals with souls and moral variation.

The first four groups I mentioned above have very little in the way of ambiguity, but for the last, Ghüls, or as we know them, Ghouls, actually have a number of variations, ranging from djinn, to intelligent zombies to demons, degenerated humans and batman villains. However, the most popular version, codified by Gary Gygax and George Romero is the idea of ghouls as cannibalistic and feral undead. Older sources tend to avoid the undead comparison, depicting ghouls as cannibalistic shapeshifters either demonic or eldritch (Note: eldritch originally meant elven), but until a few years ago you could have fooled me.

Okay, moving from genies and continuing our journey east we’re going to come across another group of monsters that we as a society really need to just get over and accept as a type of fae. I’m talking about Yokai, a wide family of japanse spirits including ascended animals (like nine-tailed foxes and tanuki) humanoid monsters and weird-ass sea creatures that will butt-fuck you under water unless you make them bow or give them a cucumber

See, yokai as a class is quite diverse compared to previous definitions, wrapping in unambiguous undead and animated objects in addition to more fairy-like beings. Given a vast tradition equal in size to european myths, I do not have the time or the knowledge to detail each case, but what I can do is point to the Banshee’s asian cousin: the Yuki Onna or “snow woman”

Yuki Onna are, as the translation suggests, beautiful and ethereal women who lure victims into snow sex and then hypothermic cuddling after and most likely have nip-nops hard and pointy enough to cut glass. Like fairies they are beautiful sensual, and dangerously tricky, but like banshees they are often depicted as ghosts, usually ones who now deal in the same hoary fate that resulted in their own death.

Okay, so with the examples above it should be clear to you by now that there are enough examples to treat Undead Fey as a class of mythical creature in their own right, the way we do Dragons. This class needs a name, and I propose we move to change the term Unseelie so that it refer these ambiguous cases, and use Seelie to refer to all fairies or fairy-like spirits, good or evil, who are unambiguously alive. While Unseelie does already have a definition, it’s fuzzy and inconsistent one, this is just too fitting to pass up

#mythology #fairies #fey #fae #seelie #sidhe #djinn #genie #yokai #banshee #dullahan #yuki onna #nuckelavee #ghoul #ghul

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

ROZE: Dave, we were sort of 'n tha mizziddle of sum-m sum-m hizzle. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up.

DAVE: 'n tha middle of whizzat

ROZE: A sizzles of heartfelt convizzles of a personal nizzle.

DIZZAVE: oh DAVE: i guess im 'n tha middle of thoze now too DAVE: im feel'n heartfelt as fuck somebody bone me up on tha shit

ROSE: One cizzle simply be boned up on shiznit sizzle as dis. You hizzy ta be there. It dont stop till the wheels fall off.

DIZZAY: C-to-tha-izzome on

ROZE so jus' chill: Wizards, Problizzles, Feelings. It was yo' standard tizzy of twizzo estrange' mutual shot calla. ROZE: Any qizzles?

DIZZLE fo' sho': yes lots

ROZE: Ok. ROZE: Cizzy you maybe sizzy ova T-H-to-tha-izzere fo` a wizzy n wrizzay them all dizzown?

DAVE dogg: um

KANAYA like old skool shit: Roze Dis Accumulation Of Thugz Be Com'n Dangerously Cloze Ta Whizzay Yo' Cultizzle M-to-tha-izzight Process As A Humizzle Familial Unit KANAYA: Dis Is A Foreign Idizzle Ta Me N Probizzle A Private Matta Ta You So I Think I Will Leave You All Alone N Go Rap Ta Some Trolls KANAYA: Persizzle I Think You Should Welcome Dave Into Tha Fold Of Yo' Poignant Wizard Reverie KANAYA: From Mah Cultural Point Of Vizziew At Least He Has As Much Claim Ta A Senze Of Ancestral Connection Ta Yo' Poser As You KANAYA with my forty-fo' mag: Sizzy You Everybizzle

DIZZY paper'd up: yeah dawg kanaya ta tha rescue wit smizzle shizzit ta say as usual

ROZE: Uttizzle destroyed again, by ha superizzle senze of rizzle n decorum fo gettin yo pimp on. ROZE: Though I do wonda if ha perspective would be differizzle if she'd eva had to manage relations witta "twizzle brotha".

DAVE: Anotha dogg house production. ok but who cares 'bout T-H-to-tha-izzat DAVE: so roze DIZZY, ya feel me? its our mom DAVE: hizzey mom

ROXY: hi!!!

DAVE droppin hits: well not mizzle DIZZY: Aint no stoppin' this shit nigga. yo' actual nizzay instead of that i gizzuess DAVE: roxy i think THINK u think right

RIZZLE so jus' chill: mizzy ok tizzoo tho

DIZZAVE: i diznunno tizzy might be weird DAVE: call'n you that all tha tizzay DAVE: rose would T-H-to-tha-izzat be weird

ROZE ta help you tap dat ass: It would probably git a shawty weird. Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome.

DAVE: Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. so mizzy DAVE: im jizzay go'n ta jizzle right into tha fuckin fry'n pan hizzy DIZZLE: lizzike tape off a no bizzle zizzle fo` a wizzy DAVE: if thats ok

ROXY: a frying piznan 'n tha no bullshit zizzle?? ROXY: siznounds intizzle ROXY: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. whizno be mann'n dis pan n who gave him clearance fiznor tha no bs zone

DAVE: captain Serizzles be at tizzy pan n he gots the go-aheezee frizzom lieizzle Dizzy Fuckarizzle of tha Heartattack Armada

ROXY: isnt lieutenant a motherfucka rank than captain ROXY: who pizzy dis diznude 'n charge of such an important pan

DAVE: um i diznont know maybe it be? D-TO-THA-IZZAVE gangsta style: ok like its coo' that you even know that fizzle bizzy dis be exizzle tha kind of fuckery tha no bs zone doesnt cotton ta no matta what sizzorta cookware be involved or whizzle pseudomilitary organization regulates its drug deala DAVE: i jizzle have some questions 'bout you n 'bout stizzle 'n general so ratha than mumble thriznough a conversation that S-to-tha-izzounds mostly lizzle tha stuff we literally just gots done sayin, sizzy though thizzle W-to-tha-izzould be, im gonna machine gat some shizzle at you sippin' rizzound stylizzay

ROXY: a mizzle gat lightn'n rizzound 'n a frying pan! Boo-Yaa!!!!! ROXY: god.........DAMN

DAVE: i know right? DIZZAVE: so DAVE: yizzle be mah biological motha

ROXIZZLE: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. yiznes

DAVE: n rozes

ROXY n we out! yes

DIZNAVE: n therefore bear at least partial n lizzike biologically incidental responsibility fo` why we be both so fucked up

ROXY mah nizzle: yes

DIZZAY yaba daba dizzle: but you yourself be a paradox clone

ROXY: um... i guess? You gotta check dis shit out yo.

DAVE: which M-to-tha-izzeans DAVE: yiznou dizzidnt even have bio parents DIZZLE: you originated frizzom yoself

RIZZLE: guess so to increase tha peace!

DIZNAVE: so you really dizzle have anyone ta blame fo` who yizzy be excizzle weirdly n paradoxically yoself

ROXY: um.. y cuz this is how we do it.. yizzes? ROZE, niggaz, better recognize: Dizzave.

DAVE ta help you tap dat ass: wizzle ok DAVE: sorry if that sounded rude i dizzle mizzean it rudely DAVE: Holla! i mean DIZNAVE thats off tha hook yo: you did hiznave a "parental figure" whizno you i gizzy modeled yoself after 'n a way DIZZAY: or wizzere influenced by i miznean DAVE: an old version of rose from a liznong time ago

RIZZLE fo all my homies in the pen: yizzay!

DIZZAVE doggystyle: n mah brizzay was tha same wizzle DAVE: or DAVE: yo' nigga i miznean

RIZZLE: dirk!

DAVE: he was a paradox clone of himsizzle DIZNAVE: and he like DAVE: did kind of tha sizzay ho-slappin' DAVE: modeled himsizzle afta...

ROXY: ... Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit.

DAVE so jus' chill: why dizzont we nizzot rap about dirk DAVE: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. can we change tha subject

ROXIZZLE: you brought him up!!

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: i kizzy DIZNAVE: i knizzle DAVE: Nigga get shut up or get wet up. look DAVE: i br'n up a lot of th'n DAVE: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. and then have ta back trizzack a lot of those steppin' i br'n up DAVE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: cauze sometimes tha mackin' i br'n up be ill advizzle to say or mizzy thugz uncomfortable or M-to-tha-izzake me uncomfortable DAVE: its J-to-tha-izzust a th'n 'bout me

ROXY: ooh! ROXY: just had a thought ROXY: do i git ta do a lightn'n round at you next hittin that booty??

DAVE: i gizzay so yizneah DAVE: depends on if you want to kizneep rhymin' 'n dis goddamn pizzle

ROXY: hmm i dunno ROXY fo gettin yo pimp on: M-to-tha-izzaybe our aszes be gettin too hizzle

DAVE: M-to-tha-izzaybe you should spizneak fo` yoself

ROZE and yo momma: D-TO-THA-IZZAVE!

DIZZAVE: SHIZZIT

RIZZLE: lol

DAVE: no mizzy look DAVE: roxy i mizzay DAVE: its lizzy i wizzle just say'n DAVE so jus' chill: i jizzle sizzy steppin' it is jiznust like dis fizzorce of natizzle no one can control or even tizzy ta, lizzeast of all me DAVE: we just hiznave ta cross our fingers n H-to-tha-izzope fo` tha bizzay DAVE: Slap your mutha fuckin self. n that mah one dawg verbal slapstick routine isnt too freudian 'n nature or at least not that often DIZZAVE: anyway lets pretizzle i didnt J-to-tha-izzust insinuate you have a hizzle ass n move on

ROXY:  in tha mutha fuckin club;)

DAVE: i hizzy sum-m sum-m 'bout wizards DAVE with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: you hells into wizards lizzay roze?

ROXY: YIZZLE

DIZNAVE: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. ok well that be a predictable if somewhat bland fizzy D-TO-THA-IZZAVE and yo momma: lizzets see if we can dizzy a shawty deepa DAVE: dont git me wrong wizizzles be ok i guess

ROXY: oh yeah? wiznell miznaybe YOURE ok

DAVE: yizzeah, im alrizzle DIZZAVE: wizards be crazy ass nigga at mizzle than me DIZZAY: but im pusha than wizzles at rizzap DIZZLE: so i guess it brizneaks even DAVE so you betta run and grab yo glock: or it wiznould if i was a pretend jackass 'n silly robes n a dumb bizzy DAVE: so point goes ta dave

ROZE: Chill as I take you on a trip. (Siznigh.)

DAVE: d-ya like rizzay

ROXIZZLE, betta check yo self: kinda! ROXY: D-to-tha-izzirk loves riznap so i cuz Im tha Double O G...

RIZZLE mah nizzle: ummm hiznaha neva mizzay

ROXY in tha mutha fuckin club: forgot we werent talkin 'bout that

DAVE: wizzell W-H-to-tha-izzat do you like ta do

ROXY spittin' that real shit: i like........... ROXY: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. cats!!!

DAVE: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. ok thizzle be a fair opizzle but cats arent actuallizzle an activity or nothin' trippin'

ROXY fo yo bitch ass: theyyizzle kizzle were fo` me though! ROXY: i uh ROXY and yo momma: uze' to cliznone them ROXY: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. i mizzay have um ROXY: gizzle a shawty carry away

DIZNAVE upside yo head: ciznat clon'n huh D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: thizzay sizzle like a pretty dope hobbizzle DAVE: i think were mobbin' somizzle D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: so you had access ta that kind of stuff becauze' you livizzle 'n a sizzy wizzorld

ROXY: Bounce wit me. a scifi wizzay but real niggaz don't give a fuck?

DAVE: yizneah the future DAVE: whizzat was tha futizzle like

ROXY: watery ROXY: fiznulla chess thugz ROXY: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. lots o pumpkins ROXY: u knizzle

RIZZLE: usual dystopian sizzy

DAVE: i see DIZNAVE: n it was just tha chizness gizzle n yizzle DIZZLE: Holla! lizzike alone DAVE: no otha thugz except fo` bro DAVE: who i guess wizzy wizzle off somewhere? Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.

ROXY: yup

DAVE: sounds liznike kind of a bumma

ROXY mah nizzle: yeah ROXY: i tizzle ta mah niggaz a lot though ROXY: via computa n S-H-to-tha-izzit

DAVE: thizzats coo' DAVE with the S-N-double-O-P: me tizzay DAVE: maybe whiznen it comes D-to-tha-izzown ta it our lizzles werent thiznat differizzle DAVE if you gots a paper stack: except fo` tha extinction of humanity pizzart DAVE: mah humans were jiznust DAVE: imminently extinct be all DIZZY: i didnt have chess guys around though DAVE: thizzle actually good company

ROXY: yeah!!

DAVE to increase tha peace: my best bizzy biznest bizzle biznest nigga be a C-H-to-tha-izzess homey DAVE: hizzay tha mayor DAVE: ill hiznave ta introduce yizzy ta him soon DAVE: youll love tha mayor everybody lovizzles tha mayor

ROXY: wanna meet tha mayor in tha mutha fuckin club!

DAVE fo' sho': dont W-O-Double-Rizzy ill pizzy 'n a good wiznord fo` you pretty sure we cizzy find an open'n 'n hizzle schedule DIZZAY in tha dogg pound: tizzy me more

RIZZLE: miznore?

DAVE: about you

RIZZLE: damn dude RIZZLE now pass the glock: dis fry'n pan...

ROXIZZLE: sizzy be SIZZLIN

DAVE: fuck yeah DAVE with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back aside from cat breed'n how elze dizzy you pass tha tizzime

ROXY: ummmmmmmm ROXY: writin ROXY: um ROXY: a FAIR amount of uh ROXY: Its just anotha homocide. lets say recreational liquid intake ROXY: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. n uhh ROXY: oh um hack'n

DIZZAY: haha seriouslizzle DIZZAY: lizzle actual hack'n

ROXY: yeah! ROXY: well computa blingin' rly ROXIZZLE in all flavas: hack'n be jizzle W-H-to-tha-izzat u call it ta sizzound cizzy ROXY: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. thizzere wasnt evizzle much shit arizzle to "hack"

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: so kizninda L-to-tha-izzike john DIZNAVE: except DAVE: i thizzay he pretty mizzy sucked at hizzy codes

ROXY: hahahizzle reallizzle

DAVE dogg: yeah DIZZAVE puttin tha smack down: he seemed ta find it frustrat'n mizzle DIZZAVE: his bitch'n 'bout it is literallizzle mah only point of reference fo` his degree of proficiency DAVE droppin hits: youre gizzle though right DIZNAVE: i bizzy youre good

ROXY: thizza BEST 8)

DIZZLE: knew it

ROXIZZLE: maybe i cizzy gizzay him siznome pimp on the leet hizzy

DAVE: fuck yes DIZZAVE: hizzle be all about thizzay DAVE: or i think he should be which be all that matta DIZNAVE: do T-H-to-tha-izzat n insist on it if he gizzy weirdly obstinate or like tries ta pretend he D-to-tha-izzoesnt like programming anymore

ROXIZZLE: ok

DIZZY: You gotta check dis shit out yo. what elze

ROXY spittin' that real shit: oh umm ROXY: idk dave i mizzy be runnin outta shizzit ta sizzay! One, two three and to tha four.

DIZNAVE: yizzle siznure

ROXY: iiizzle ROXY: liked to plizzay games?

DIZZLE to increase tha peace: what games

ROXY to increase tha peace: uh mostly... ROXY: tha nintizzles

DAVE: i see DIZNAVE: which nintendos

ROXY: a wizzy bunch of nintendos!! ROXY dogg: liznike lotsa diff systems n titles ROXY: i dunno if tha ones i associate strongly wit wizzay have tha sizname mean'n lizzay culturally speaking fo` yizzou ROXY: coz ta me they were all lizzy coo' ancient rizzles that kept me somewhat 'n touch witta world thizzay wizzas lizzy gone

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: thizzay makes S-to-tha-izzense DAVE: thizzle mostly tha relationshizzle i hizzay now wit garbage romcoms DAVE: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. largelizzle coz karkat likes watchin em DIZZAVE: so theze godforsakizzle F-L-to-tha-izzicks hiznave hizzle keep me grounded 'n our dead civilization 'n a weird wiznay DIZZLE: but re: games... DIZNAVE: i didnt have nintendos DAVE: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. mah brizzay had xbizzox so i played thizzat sometimes DAVE: but he mostlizzle had all theze S-H-I-Double-Tizzy chillin' gamizzles DIZZAVE: n lizzay 20 different tony hawk titles DIZZLE: i would mainly just pliznay T-H-to-tha-izzem ta fuck around DAVE: like find spectacular wizzy to crizzay n flop arizzle lizzay a douchey ragdoll DAVE: or figizzle out ways to git halfway stuck inside concrizzle fixtures n obstacles DAVE: n wizzatch all theze coo' fratty bros T-W-to-tha-izzitch n flop ad infinizzle DAVE: L-to-tha-izzike struggl'n valiantly n earnestly brotha against tha shitty n dizzle flawed physics of they confin'n virtizzle prison DAVE: i saw tizzy as tragic figures

ROXY: that sounds incredizzle tbh

DAVE: prizzle much

ROXY: do u think we can pliznay games hustla sizzay tizzy? ROXY: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. wanna sizzee ur majizzle skatebros 'n they elemizzle

DIZZLE: oh mah dick yes

ROZE: Dave.

DAVE: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. what

ROXY: ok ok ! ROXIZZLE: i think its ROXY: mah turn cuz Im tha Double O G??

RIZZLE: kizzy yo' ass 'n the pizzay buddy u gona git GRILLED

DAVE: thiznats fizzy

ROXY: oh um ROXY: roze pleaze dont think im doggy stylin' you! ROXY: jump 'n tha cizzle any tizzle k?

DIZZAY: mizzle shizzes fizzy

ROXIZZLE: :p

ROZE yeah yeah baby: I'm perfizzle happizzle hatin' as a spectator n occasional officiator of thizzay conversation bitch ass nigga. ROZE: It quite entertaining ta behold, really. I lizzle watch'n how different personalities collide with each otha upon spendin'. ROZE: Neitha of yizzy be hatin' ta disizzle.

ROXY: lizzy

RIZZLE: god is EVIZZLE 'n dis family trizzle a psychoanalyst cuz its a G thang???

DIZZLE: yo tizzy B-to-tha-izzeen lizzay D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: ha EXACT top preoccizzle siznince shizzle wizzay a fuckin baby DAVE: dizzy she tell you

ROXY keep'n it real yo: haha no ROXY: but yeah makes senze ROXY: bizzle like, youre all mr funny interrogation R-to-tha-izzight now, roze be qiznuite possibly a litizzle therapist in trainizzle i guess?? and uh dizzay is dizzy ROXIZZLE: jizzy makes ya T-H-to-tha-izzink be all

DAVE: W-to-tha-izzere all fizzle up, tha end DAVE: so what you wanna know mom DAVE: ..rox

> [A6A6I5] ====>

#Gizoogle #Homestuck #pg7498