#bismuth can say fuck any time she wants to

[whim-prone-pirate]

let them say fuck

#if not them who else. #garnet could go 'oh fuck😕' in that voice she does #amythest could go 'awww what the fuck man !!!☹️' #pearl is not against cursing but i can't even imagine how it would sound in her voice #future steven says fuck in every conversation as emphasis (he's me) #connie really only says fuck when she's angry or frustrated #peridot refuses to let go of clod #bismuth can say fuck any time she wants to #i'd let her #but STEVONNIE #THEY !!! would get to go 'DUUUDE HOLY FUCK😱😧' in that little .. #surfer boy stoner voice they do #like a fucking icon #that could be an entire episode #i'm done soz #steven universe #stevonnie #connie maheswaran #connverse #su

[villains4hire]

Lapis Lazuli

1 - For starters? Out the gate, I roleplay this character as ace. Did years ago in the SU fandom and I see no reason to change her. I will ship her and more or less smut with her still, however, but be picky and be sensible about it as I did prior. Regardless, and here’s my personal message to anyone who has a problem with this: Ace people have dated, had sex, or been repulsed are varied and not a monolith, etc. The amount of weird control I see over shipping Ace characters, sex lives is fucking creepy, but also I understand if it’s disregarded or sexualized/handled poorly and I hear you, I can relate to that in my own, but not exact experiences. But those outside of being ace who do not understand nuance and are incredibly aggressive or annoying about this? Fuck off and quit talking shit about stuff you don’t get, take more than five seconds looking up a definition to learn about how actual people live. Anyway, you’re free to ask me if you want to ship, but I will say if I don’t think it’ll work I’ll tell you out the gate. I will just say there are gems just canonically involved with people, so it’s not because she’s alien. I just hrm, can’t really see her into people a lot of the time other than in certain ways I can’t really say is ‘down-bad’, though could be willing.

2 - I roleplay Lapis more or less with the ending of SU but also my original characterization, I believe before the Malachite arc ended years and years ago. She’s a bit fighty, lonerish, but incredibly loving if close, bit of a goofball, memer, more below etc. That being said? My Lapis is stand-alone. She is not to be presumed to be living or with Peridot, Bismuth or otherwise and isn’t a Crystal Gem. She fights for the people she cares about, but it’s nothing canon changing other than motivations, relationships or what she identifies with in terms of factions etc. I roleplayed this character for her potential and friendship with Steven and still do. Most canon-compliant Stevens I’ll accept out the gate but at least ask me first.

3 - This character is fairly powerful to being overpowered? Bit of a glass cannon if physically hit though, so bit of a warning if on Earth for example or other heavy water-based planet.

4 - I will have this character curse occasionally, as Lapis is probably one of the few who would. But I’ll try not to go crazy with it. 5 - Oh right Jasper is also in the wrong, but I will say that Lapis abused the ever living heck out of her with Malachite. I am not going to skirt around that and if you try to say otherwise or have a problem with it? Do not approach me for this character, as I embrace every aspect of a character if I take them up as I like. As Lapis is a victim, yes, but it does not make her weak, if anything? It made her one of the more formidable characters of the series and dangerous.

Do I want them to die: Nah. Stakes can be high but SU has no real death other than skirting the censors for shatterings. Death can occur in rps so long as it isn’t too gorey though. Just have them pop like a balloon or something into paste if shot with a laser or like comically smushed etc. Will I have/get icons: I have them Tag: tide reformed (Multiverse, after the events of SU default verse) tide formed (Homeworld Verse, Prior to Meeting Steven and the mirror) Age: 10k+ Years in terms of age. Sex: Nothing. She’s a rock. Gender: Fine with any pronouns, he/she. Race: Gem Race - Subcaste: Lapis Lazuli Sexuality: Ace. Personality traits: Extremely loyal. Loving. Distrustful of outsiders, people or even other Gems at first until she knows their intentions. Can be incredibly selfless, but also selfish. Can enter toxic relationships at times, especially if it’s her in control in terms of power or wrestling power into her control. Unforgiving, grumpy at times though is not incapable of forgiving people. Can hold a grudge. Has deep guilt regarding certain things. Tends to forget certain people she doesn’t hold much regard for. Brutal beyond words if pushed or she sees the need to be, is not canonically above torture. Is a touch unstable at times in terms of anger from being in isolation for six thousand years, but has immense willpower as she’s one of the few who didn’t go outright insane. Enjoys memes. Art if you could call it that in the form of ‘Meep-Morps’ and other activities in random garbled words. Likes memes even if she misunderstands them, phrases, words even if she misuses or misremembers them. Deadpan sense of humor or grimness but also can mess with people. Laidback, likes to be lazy and lounge. Likes jokes, humor, a little immature honestly for what she’s willing to get into for some good fun. Mental traits: Gem Mentality, she isn’t human by any means. Physical traits: Pretty slim, petite, inhuman body type but not overtly so. Flat-chested, thickish legs and all around a smaller body. Around 5′1 to 5′2 and has a free-spirited but mature beauty to her despite her personality. Powers: All of this is simply here canon powers as this character does not need help other than flavor for a few unsaid things. Enhanced Condition - greater strength, speed, and durability but varies gem to gem Immune to disease - age. Bubbling - can bubble objects, gems or large objects like other gems can. Shapeshifting - can shapeshift form, parts of herself. Regeneration - reforming and such after poofing. Gravity Shifting - adjusts to gravitational changes. Weapon Summoning - she’s never had a weapon summoned before as she usually just has water. It’s presumed she has one though, however, and it’s basically a whip-sword that moves and flows like water. And can be manipulated as such and use her hydrokinesis, it’s usually used like that of a razor ring in self-defense when there’s no water around. Hydrokinesis - Lapis is exceptionally strong in this regard it seems even compared to other gems. Most likely from being more early generation gems than the later ones. It’s a self-explaining ability but the exact limit is not known but it’s planetary for the manipulation she’s capable of. She could potentially manipulate high-density liquid entities but I will say that blood is not water-like enough for her to do this to and it’s more intended for liquid metal and minerals such as moving tectonic plates since she’s a terraforming gem. Water Generation - she can generate a certain amount of water from her gem, but it’s unknown. She usually use’s this with a combo with her weapon if forced into tapping into it. Water Form Manipulation - she can cause water to turn into ice or even use it as deadly projectiles. Thermal Manipulation - she is capable of causing water to steam or boil. Hydromimicry - she can create clones against her enemies. Water Bubbles -  she can use these to imprison gems, people, granted they’ll drown if not given air. Water-Walking - she can walk on water and even allow others to walk on water with her. Water Wings - she can fly using a form of water wings and like other things, she can manipulate, stretch and even punch with them. Memory Projection - can project memories onto a mirror-like surface or still enough water. Pathokinesis Resistance - she is immune to emotional manipulation such as Blue Diamond’s empath attacks. This is not to be confused with White Diamond’s ability to control other gems. High Nobility Status - Lapis Lazulis judging by their demeanor for the others we’ve seen and the vast amount of power they have? Seem to be Blue Diamond’s higher gems, so when it matters. I will say that Lapis is pretty high up there in terms of caste and privilege. Motivations: To be free. To move past what’s happened. To belong, to find purpose beyond her original intent. To find what’s considered home. Backstory: The entire wiki for her other than being with Peridot, Bismuth, at the barn. I primarily have her come and go, then mostly show up to help Steven, make a few friends but more or less just have her in the background. She comes when she’s needed or wants to be there and gets better about it as time goes on, along with those approaching her consistently does she become more social. She never considers herself a Crystal Gem but she told Homeworld to eat it basically.

#tide reformed #long post #tide formed #bios #bios save

[yumeirochaser]

finished all of steven universe (show/movie/shippuden)

okay so stewing on it. this show as a whole is very good. great, even!! i feel like a lot of the criticisms thrown at it online are kinda bullshit, and it is way more nuanced than i remember. it is VERY flawed, but ultimately good.

i'll start with the pros of the whole project:

-really impeccable art direction and music. this show is a feast for the eyes, esp since it's a 2010s project

-very nuanced discussions of complex emotional topics (outside of one big case)

-REALLY good cast, there's only like 3 bad charas, but everyone else is really really good and compelling

-actually really good diverse and lgbt rep. i love yuri fam. we got so much yuri here.

-really good drama and jokes. it's actually very good at balancing both tones

-brisk and nice to watch

-REALLY good complex characters. rose/pink is unironically one of the tragic toxic woman all timers

-the songs rule. lotta bangers here

-i love the character designs a lot!!!!

so yeah it is VERY good!! but also really flawed. here's the cons:

-really bizarre show pacing and episode placing, which tbh i can't blame too much on them bc it WAS CN's fault for making the insane idea of stevenbombs

-the fuck it we ball planning is REALLY apparent at times

-the wide majority of the cast is very underfocused, despite the show constantly setting them up to have bigger roles. i would say the quartet of jasper/bismuth/lapis/peridot were the most prominent victims of this, but it's in general since it is the result of...

-steven himself being a VERY weak lead, with the insistence of everything being in his POV limiting the show and contriving plots more than anything. he is in fact imo, the show's biggest flaw, severely hurting it by the end of future. they really struggle with making him likeable and interesting, and the way the show insists to focus on him makes a lot of major character beats depend on him being on screen or just. happen completely off screen. certain plots also get REALLY convoluted to have him in places and private situations he really shouldn't be in for us to actually see what happens to other characters at all. he's also very one note and not really allowed to be as complex as the rest of the cast, with him constantly being exonerated of any wrong thing he does, by either being right all along or a woobie. this does get real uncomfortable with plots like the lars body swap ep, the lars/sadie ship eps and the entire second half of future bc. he gets reaaaal weird and possessive with the rest of the cast there and it's more or less glossed over. he also kind of is limited to One personality trait per season, being one walking fat joke in S1, fluctuating between funy permachild and messiah complex guy in the rest of the main show and the movie and becoming just walking whump material in future. it's weird bc he DOES improve and develop in S2, esp with the peridot arc, but then they more or less reverse his development for the rest of the show after the cluster arc ends??? it's a bizarre choice. his presence really looms over this show, like a black hole. like conceptually he's really good and he has moments where he can shine, but his execution in the majority of the show is very poor imo. like i get what they wanted to do with him in future and i agree it's a necessary topic to discuss. but also they should have made him like. an actual character people would like for that to work lmao

related to this we gotta talk about. connie. man. she was hit with the shonen jump love interest stick since very early on and she never recovered. her training arc kinda ends on nothing, she kind of only is there to fuse into stevonnie a bunch of the time (with their uh. weird ass early eps. why fanservice the little kid fusion.) and she more or less is just reduced to being steven's loyal emotional support woman by the end of future. honestly it's weird how nobody talks about the way she is treated bc it's oddly bad for a show that usually treats its diverse charas really well. like damn she really got done dirty.

but yeah i wish we were able to have eps with the rest of the cast leading bc they are really good characters. i think my faves are garnet (she actually got focused on the most out of all gems, which i don't really see fans mention either. she's great), rose (she's so fucked. i love it.), amethyst (more femmes should be allowed to be gross weird assholes in tv.) and peridot (rancid moe...). but i love all the gems they are great. the townies are also really fun!! (outside of ronaldo & kevin). i wish we could have actually seen more of the cast's lives, thoughts and interests outside of steven...i just really like these characters a lot

it's kind of a shame the show kinda goes down the gutter with future's second half bc the majority of it is really good shit with really nuanced handling of themes like chains of abuse, unorthodox families, familial abuse, trauma, abandonment, war and grieving. i legit think this show was something special and bold for its time, and i wish it ended in a better way. i had a really good time with it and i still love the cast a lot, but yeaaah they shouldn't have turned steven into the center of the universe. that really hurt it by the end. it's a good show that left me with a really weird feeling by the end. i will still cherish the time i had with it but yeaaah. it is a shame bc i really dig the concept of future, but the execution was like ehhhhhh hmmm not very good. the rest of the show clears in these topics tho we love screwed up girls. objectively tho there is way more good aspects to this show than good ones. it's just that the one big bad thing it has is the main focus of the whole dealio lmao

i wish future didn't screw up at the end but i am glad this show exists and it did pave the way for other shows! so at least there's that!! i will miss the crystal gems and their funky friends a lot....

#stuff happa watches #not tagging the show bc i don't wanna be jumped lmao

[tricobicoart]

steven universe half-gem self insert 2

Rothena! I started calling her that to differentiate her from su athena, but it ended up sticking so that's her name now! She was originally gonna be a half gem like steven & mae, but i changed it so she was born to a human father and a human mother. The origin of this was inspired by a fic i read where(spoilers for the fic, written just-post-pink-diamond-reveal) "connie thought she was pink diamond bc when she was younger, she got really ill & her parents tried an experimental treatment made of pink diamond's fake shards ground up & put in her blood or something, and so she had some gem abilities/endurances. and she told steven she was pink diamond the same time steven told her abt rose being pink diamond which was a rly fun read tbh BUT i'm going with this being half-rose-quarz-athena's origin story. She got rly fucking sick & her parents were desperate so they were like 'sure we'll augment her with this rose quartz gem, we want her to live' and now she's a half gem." Rothena's powers take more concentration to use when she's calm than they do when she's nervous or in a state of adrenaline, and they'll probably cap at some point instead of growing and expanding like steven's or pink diamond's or mae's, althought she may find more creative ways to use what she's got, like steven in s1.

She has healing powers (not healing tears, nor spit, just kind of will-power-focus-towards-the-body-part-closest-to-the-wound) slower than the medigun, but definitely faster than the wound healing on its own. She can sacrifice some of her energy to speed up the healing as well. She cannot summon her own weapon, but can summon objects from her gem and has way more storage than a quartz has, but still less than a pearl--i'd say about one 7/11 or two storage wars sized storage units' worth! She also has that sword, custom made by Bismuth, that she uses as her main weapon. I'm also considering giving her a shield that she used pre-bismuth & pre-wedding/cym/connie's sword breaking.

Since she hasn't had her gem since before birth, Rothena is more of a fusion. Her halves can separate without any negative effects to either of them besides momentary weakness to the human component and aching loneliness(which worsens the more they are separated & away from each other) to both of them. She named her human half "Thena" and her gem half "Rosa"(pronounced with a soft 'S'). Creative, i know. Also for each half-gem i try to give them a non-human physical attribute--for mae it's her unnaturally purpley blue eyes, for steven i color his hair pink-tinted, and for rothena her skin is tinted pink (but her human half's skin tone is identical to su athena's).

#steven universe #steven universe self insert #su si #su rothena #my su si's #my drawings #also in my universe half-gem fusion clothin works by gem fusion clothing rules so there #and half gems can get & store energy from the sun if they don't have access to food/water or may need some for an emergency later #su

[thefoldedbird]

Steven Universe Character Analysis - Pearl

Pearl is a victim of her own making at times. We see her grieve Rose and the relationship they shared but I can’t help but wonder how much of it was her own fault behind the scenes. The romance dying. Why she chose Greg instead of Pearl.

Pearl is -ironically- a big fan of status quo. She believes in gem superiority. Gems are better than humans. Humans are these creatures they need to protect because the one she loves and respects says so. (The whole subtle lingering thought that Pearl still only is loyal to earth through a shade of loyalty to Rose.)

She believes so strongly in her place beside Rose that she finds it uncompromisable. Pearl believes that no matter who Rose meets or romances in the end, Pearl is endgame. Pearl believes she is unable to be replaced romantically and therefore simply waits for Rose to return to her when she grows bored of her flings.

This is the way it was for thousands of years. As far as our lifespans are usually concerned she was kind of right.

Pearl never needed to try. Pearl believed they were as close as close gets (fusion aside) and therefore was unable to really compete with Greg in any meaningful way. She defaults to what Rose desires. She never really directly opposes Greg in front of Rose, only makes petty remarks behind the scenes. After all, why would thousands of years of a pattern break now?

Greg ultimately does “win” Rose. And if “it’s over isn’t it” is anything to go by Pearl never reconciled this.

(There’s something to be said for how Greg and Pearl relate to Rose. Pearl knows Rose was Pink Diamond. She was there when everything went down. She is uniquely aware of the situation. But Greg can relate to the experience through the use of his own. And THAT holds weight. Pearl knew what Rose went through and could/would make excuses for her behavior. But Greg is someone who had a relative/relatable experience to Rose’s and still grew from it. And I’m sure that attracted Rose immensely.)

Pearl thought she knew everything about Rose. They were close. They had to be. Then she finds out after Rose’s death she doesn’t even know her as well as she thought. She was as loyal to Rose as a gem could be and Rose still didn’t trust her enough?

I’m not surprised Pearl was messed up for so long and still is to this day. Like sure, the grief never goes away, but it follows her like a heavy shadow.

I dunno, I just really like analyzing the different types of grief displayed in the show in relation to Rose’s death.

EDIT

I thought of more. Rose never really received parental love from the diamonds. All of was conditional. Conditional in a way that she was bad at and she was punished constantly for it.

I wonder if all those early human flings ended due to minor conflicts which sent Rose running back to Pearl -someone that would support her unquestioningly. Pearl felt it was not her right to punish or judge Rose. But Pearl also felt close to Rose and was willing to go beyond servitude and entertain the idea of romance.

Someone willing to offer undying support and affections unquestioned? Sign Rose the fuck up. She hasn’t felt loved most of the time and these humans are more complicated that she wants to deal with for too long.

Pearl is familiar territory. Easy to understand. God forbid she put THAT in jeopardy. So she hides the pieces of herself she thinks Pearl wouldn’t take so kindly to (like the resurrected lions and Bismuth) and plays house with her for a very long time.

Was it wrong? Yeah. But were they both complicit in some ways? Absolutely. They are products of their environment and a distinct lack of good mentors. Blind leading the blind but the blind have swords.

By the time growth hits Rose we would consider her “too far gone”. She’s made to many mistakes. And she knows that. But she can’t fix most of them by the time she would’ve thought to do so, so she just makes peace with quietly carrying the guilt and let’s the problems fade back to the background.

That whole thing with Bismuth was fucked up though. Like HOLY shit. Unforgivable. Locked her away and didn’t even tell her friends. Didn’t go back for her before giving birth to Steven. Didn’t try to right some of her wrongs or give the friends that would succeed her some piece of mind.

#steven universe #su pearl #character analysis

[mandareeboo]

SU Music Rankings

Bc I can and I wanna start some Disk Horse rip. These are all in order of preference, with explanations, etc. It’s a long bitch. That said, I’m not counting little short jingles or small joke songs like Little Butler. This is the meat and potatoes of SU music- just under 30 songs. I might do the rest if people like my takes lol.

I scored it mostly on three bases- how dear it was to my heart, how much/often I relisten to it, and also what it means to the plot. That said, little fun songs don’t automatically go farther down than big, plot-heavy songs either! It’s a strange little balance.

Special Note: I don’t dislike any of this music! I love SU and that includes its bumps and glitches. I just pick favorite children lol.

1.) Change

Was there ever a more Steven moment than when he wiped the blood off his face and kissed it into sparkles? I think not. 

If “Be Wherever You Are” is an ode to young Steven, then this is teen Steven’s. Talking about change, and how much and how little it can do. How he holds his arms up for Spinel to hug him, so trusting. How he seems able to just. Break into soft tears at will, and not to be manipulative- it’s just his kind nature. The warmth in his voice. Fuck yesssss.

2.) Change Your Mind

This song is only fifty five seconds and it’s EVERYTHING to me. It really felt like someone was speaking the words I’d always held deep inside of me, unsure of how to say. It feels like a goodbye to someone who never really loved me. 

As much as I enjoyed Future, if this was the finale of SU, I would’ve been perfectly okay with that.

3.) Drift Away

This song gave me legitimate shivers the first time I heard it, and it still haunts me to this day. Spinel stayed, and waited, and all she got was a transmission thousands of years later. Fuck.

4.) Here We Are In The Future

THE MOVIE IS SU AS ITS BEST AND I WON’T BE SWAYED ON IT. Steven being a teen who loves his weird family but is growing just a bit sarcastic to their drama. The adorable love he and Connie share. His slow realization that he will always be working, always have things to do, is both somber and real. The Crystal Gems won’t be safe with one epic battle. They’ll be safe with years of hard work and love. HIS LITTLE HANDSHAKE WITH AMETHYST.

This is a helluva bop and a great way to summarize the main character’s backstories.

5.) Let’s Only Think About Love

Did ya’ll know that Zach Callison killed his throat with that last note? He gave his all for this performance in a vocal range he no longer comfortably do and by god did it SHINE. The FLAIR. The FORESHADOWING. All of the Gems all being awkward about Rose and Steven trying to bring them to the present. Peridot having a mini-existential crisis in a cute yellow dress. I love Zach Callison’s normal singing voice but man is that a fucking bop. Nothing will ever beat it.

6.) Here Comes A Thought

This bad boy helped me out a LOT with some mental issues I was dealing with in high school. I was unmedicated, unsupervised, and full of anxiety. I’d have break downs when I tried to speak about certain things. I couldn’t function. This song inspired me. It helped me feel okay with my intrusive thoughts.

And the episode! -chef’s kiss-. Once again bringing up the morally gray area of training child soldiers. Connie expanding her social group. Steven’s trauma hauling ass in that second half. The ANIMATION. Stevonnie’s gorgeous singing voice. GOD yes.

7.) It’s Over Isn’t It?

Just barely squeaking above Stronger Than You, this ballad is everything gorgeous. The whole episode is. I think Mr. Greg stands in the top five of my episodes for the entire show. It even got nominated!

There’s just so much about this song that I love. The gentle melancholy of Pearl’s voice. How the crew had to redo the shots for this bit bc Deedee went so fucking hard. The hard cuts between Pearl, remembering the love of her life, and Steven, who has begun to feel like he took her away. I’d recommend this song to anyone, regardless of what they do or don’t know about SU, simply bc it tugs so many heartstrings of love, loss, and responsibility.

8.) Stronger Than You

Did you realize this episode aired SEVEN years ago? This bitch was what got me into SU! Hearing about Ruby and Sapphire made my little gay heart so happy inside, and then getting a whole song confirming that they were a couple, that their love powered the strongest Gem on the team? Aaaaaaaaa

To this DAY I get excited when I hear Estelle start singing. This song is timeless. This song will live in media history. God I fucking love this song.

9.) Other Friends

I’m not the biggest musical person, so I hadn’t heard of Sarah Stiles before her casting as Spinel, but JESUS CHRIST the lady went hard. She went SO fucking hard. Sarah Stiles started on 100 and somehow just kept CLIMBING. You can just hear the sheer manic energy building in her voice, the anger and resentment. 10/10 Sarah Stiles is a queen.

10.) Independent Together

This made the list entirely bc the crew was like “you’re gonna get a himbo ass Steven-Greg fusion singing with Opal while Garnet flies across the moon on Lion while floating” and I am forever thankful to them for it

11.) Who We Are

Bismuth deserved more songs. ‘Nuff said.

12.) Peace and Love (On the Planet Earth)

It Could’ve been Great is EASILY one of my favorite s2 episodes. I love the entire concept of this song. Of Steven making music to reflect how much Earth means to him and his family. Of him teaching Peridot some self-care. Also Peridot’s singing voice is really cute and squeaky. 

I know it’s silly, but I would’ve really enjoyed a flip around of this in Future! Like Peridot reminding Steven how much he loves music, that he needs to take time to relax for himself, maybe with a new verse or just a remix of the original song!

13.) Something Entirely New

I watched this episode as it aired, and I legitimately almost cried. I love Charlyne Yi’s voice so much ya’ll- her raspy, not perfect singing voice against Sapphire’s deep soothing lull is great.

And to have Ruby and Sapphire’s meeting be the way it was- for Ruby to bemoan Sapphire losing Homeworld, to being stuck with a single Ruby, while Sapphire is a noble who has always been taught everyone in her “caste” is vitally important (and has, in her own mind, taken that to mean every Gem, as she should) and how they come together and make each other happy. Good shit good shit.

14.) I’m Just a Comet

The fact that Greg’s music career never really blasted off pisses me off to this day bc Tom Scharpling’s voice is fucking BUTTER. Also the song really feels like a jab at his parents now that we know the kind of dynamic he had growing up. “This life in the stars if all I’ve ever known” is definitely him wiping away their existence after reminding them (and himself) the things they used to say about him.

15.) Do It For Her

This episode. This fucking episode. This episode got me permanently hooked on SU. I’d just binged season 1 and was kinda meh about it overall after the bop of Stronger Than You. “Oh,” I thought to myself, foolishly, “I’ll probably just casually watch this from time to time.”

Like three days later Sworn to the Sword aired and that was it. I was hooked! Pearl’s gentle training song turning darker and darker, Connie’s accompaniment from nervous to determined to fully into such a toxic mindset. The fact that SU had the BALLS to discuss the repercussions of training child soldiers, now and later. This episode was everything to me, STILL is everything to me.

Six years and well over 100 fanfics written later, I think it’s safe to say this show swallowed me whole and never let go.

16.) System/Boot.pearl_final(3)

I debated putting this on the list because it’s not anything crazy important, just a way to show things are Wrong, but I had to do it entirely bc Pearl is so damn SALTY.

Like telling us about the Gems makes sense, she felt like she was given a duty, but she went so damn petty. WHY is that Ruby alone. Gross. This Amethyst is a trash dump. Wtf are you people.

17.) Full Disclosure

This episode really feels like a turning point for SU. Before, the show had its dark moments- but now we’re in the thick of it, and it’s not going away. Full Disclosure felt like an rebuff to the idea of returning to any normal we’d established in season 1. Gems are actually a giant species now. Gems tried to kill us now. There’s this Yellow Diamond bitch who got namedropped. Something about a Cluster. 

The song itself is BALLER, with its ingenious use of Steven’s ringtone and photos as he tries to decide whether to clue in Connie on all this nonsense. Meanwhile we, the audience, already know damn well Connie about to yeet some common sense into him.

18.) What’s the Use of Feeling Blue?

I’mma admit it- I’m a Yellow Diamond stan. I’ve always loved her- her anger, her poise, her hardworking nature. I actively argued against the “Yellow Shattered Pink” theories back in the day. But, man, when this arc leaked? I got so overexcited I was too jittery to watch it for like two days. It’s easily my favorite arc of the series. The sheer alien nature of the zoo, the Famethyst, and absolutely Patti Lupone’s beautiful ballad. Goddamn. Yellow singing to Blue to try and help her regain her old status, the warble in her voice as she reminds Blue she misses Pink too, the movement of the bubbles as she talks about attack. It gives me shivers to this day. FUCK.

19.) Tower of Mistakes

This is, fun fact, that only SU song I have completely memorized. The story itself is kinda funny! See, we lost internet at my house for a solid 5 to 6 months when these episodes aired, so I only got a very brief window to view them all. But this was the first Amethyst song in a long while, and I didn’t want to forget it! So I keep replaying it in my head for ages. And that’s still definitely a thing.

Anyway will never not be sad that this entire song was about making it up to Garnet for Amethyst’s perceived slights with Sugilite (which was a two-way road), only for Garnet to pressure her into fusion later when pissed and never discuss it again bc Garnet probably never thought twice about it and Amethyst has the emotional openness of a clam that’s just been told its ugly. Helluva way to make someone feel like shit, G. Helluva way to bottle that shit, Ames.

20.) On the Run

I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times: Amethyst! Needed! More! Songs! 

The dichotomy between Steven’s play and Amethyst’s honest desire to run away from home is so well-done, especially when you consider a lot of Steven and Amethyst’s actions are playing together. The song is also near and dear to me simply bc it’s my favorite Amethyst episode to exist (well, maybe second to What’s Your Problem, but not by much). Moments like these are all the proof I need that they were right to fuse first.

21.) Be Wherever You Are

This tune really just feels like an ode to who Steven was as a kid. Trapped on an island with no way home, and he’s just happy to be with his friends. The stars are beautiful and not oppressive. Also that one animatic with Lars and the Off Colors playing in the Homeworld Kindergarten to this music was iconic and made this song get stuck in my head for a solid month.

22.) Familiar

I ADORE how the crew use bright neon colors to show how alien Homeworld can be. And Steven recognizing that the Diamonds treat him how the CGs used to, and how prepared he is to “fix” a broken family. It’s a soft, gentle tune about melancholy. Also the Pebbles are beautiful.

23.) Let Me Drive My Van Into Your Heart

Such a cute little love ballad, but every time I listen to it now I just imagine the heart attack Rose must’ve had at the line “And if we look out of place/Well, baby, that's okay/I'll drive us into outer space.” like there’s a Vietnam war flashback if I ever heard one

24.) What Can I Do?

I’m kind of neutral on this one? Rose and Greg both have great voices, but the song itself lacks many lyrics. I think it was definitely a good way to show Rose’s flaws in thinking.

Also, I’m shocked they managed cram that much vaguely sexual innuendo into two minutes, followed by how Not Hetereo that dance between Rose and Pearl was, and not get their asses chewed by it. You go guys.

25.) Cookie Cat

I love a lot of the vibes this song has. The lyrics are so damn prophetic, but they also sound like the kind of weird 90s commercials I grew up on. It’s been like two decades since I saw the Shirley Temple commercial but I’ll be damned if I don’t remember “Animals crackers in my soup! Monkey and rabbits loop-de-loop.”

26.) Giant Woman

I am. NOT the biggest fan of Steven’s original singing voice. I feel bad saying that, since it was just Zach Callison as a kid, but he never jived well with me for some reason. So I wouldn’t listen to this on the fly. 

The song itself is still really good though, with all sorts of fun animation of Amethyst and Pearl being bitchy to each other. It’s a bit sad in hindsight to see tiny Steven trying to get his moms to get along. Ahh, season 1.

27.) Strong in the Real Way

This song has SUCH a strong start. Pearl reflecting on Sugilite’s problems, but the show making sure to show us that Pearl’s lack of enthusiasm towards her also lends itself to jealousy as well as just general malaise. How much she cares about Steven, and wants him to grow up strong. 

And then Steven just kinda. Ruins it? I appreciate his enthusiasm for tryna bulk up but to take what was starting as such a rich, personal song and broadcasting it to random strangers just makes me a bit sad. Almost a bit angry on her behalf?

28.) That Distant Shore

I KNOW this is gonna create some discourse, but I’m just not the biggest Lapis stan. I love her voice. I love the visuals of the song. And I get why she felt afraid and needed to flee.

But Lapis never got to take responsibility for her own actions. And, in the end, the song feels hollow to me- because we all know she’ll never talk to anyone about it, know she’ll burst back in and destroy the barn, and no one will ever question it. I like Lapis a lot, but I feel like her arc never was fully finished. She never got help. She never learned to feel safe.

29.) Dear Old Dad

I’ve yet to meet a single human being who likes this episode tbh. There’s some great discussion about what kind of parent Greg is from it, and what kind of dynamic he has with the Gems that he felt he had to fake an injury to hang out with his son. Honestly the first half was fine and dandy. It’s just that then they Greg just went out of his way to drag Steven away from missions and such. It never jived well with his character before or after.

Also, is it just me, or does Zach himself sound like he hates the song as he sings it? There’s no passion or heart in his voice. It sounds like they told him to read off cue cards and he did. Tom Scharpling’s best attempts didn’t save this one for being a skipper. But the episode, unfortunately, isn’t, so it gets a spot on here.

#Steven Universe #Steven Universe Future #SU Analysis #(I guess????) #Music #Steven Quartz Universe #Amethyst #Garnet #Pearl #Yellow Diamond #Blue Diamond #Blue Pearl #Yellow Pearl #Greg Universe #Bismuth #Spinel #Lapis Lazuli #Steg #Opal #Rose Quartz #Lars Barriga #Sadie Miller #Sapphire #Ruby #Stevonnie #Falc talks

[bigsteeb]

this is gonna be a long post so bear with me, growing pains got a b i g emotional reaction out of me & I need to share my thoughts & feelings about it because jesus fucking christ.

ok first things first, someone hug this boy immediately. he’s sat in his room, still in his pajamas, in day time watching dog copter. this whole scene is just steven going “lol I’m sad, I’m gonna comfort eat & stay in my pajamas & watch a kids show I watched when I wasn’t as sad haha” & it’s not only upsetting, but relatable too fuck. his room is a mess along with him eating ice cream at what I assume is morning… making it his breakfast? geez steven. also idk if it’s just me here but in this shot he looks… bigger? like ignoring his body size shifting later on in the episode he looks a lot wider than he usually does when paul & drew board episodes to me, he’s rivalling etienne & maya’s steven’s wideness. did he… get chubbier from comfort eating? how much time has passed since together forever for him to put on weight if he has? this could literally just be steven slouching or his pajamas making him look bigger but as someone who is an advocate for the body positivity shown in su & suf it has me curious. I want to hug this soft, sad boy. It could also be due to how steven’s design fluctuates through the animation process, it’s never really on model all the time. 

the grunting noise he makes in this scene is very distressing, as are other moments from the episode too. a glimpse at the glow-bracelet he proposed to connie with is enough to physically pain him? fuck me man. is he leaving his room where there’s already ice cream… to get more ice cream? sobs. also the puns in this shot. I cant? slow burn?! you’re evil crewniverse. not to mention his body size changing throughout this scene, god this poor lad.

screams, this was when I started worrying. the boy is now in an environment he has never been in before & is feeling extremely uncomfortable & vulnerable. look at the lines under his eyes, his sad eyebrows & pout I hate it. also don’t even get me started on this part. the slight raise of a voice being enough to send him into panic?! fuck I hate how much I relate to that. 

here’s where I immediately broke, no god damn pun intended. seeing steven’s skeleton, steven’s fucking skull, like this pained me. that crack on his skull is from fucking jasper in jail break. I can’t express all of the visceral emotions that were going through my body at this. there was intense sadness for steven, extreme anger at jasper & the gems for allowing shit like this to happen to him. turns out he’s not as resilient as we thought he was. each hit he takes physically breaks him & then his gem instantly heals his wounds, my heart fucking broke at this. think back to everything that happened to him, everything that physically hurt him. it broke him I can’t deal with it! then there’s what priyanka says to steven next;

“you seem to of made a series of miraculous recoveries, but that doesn't change the fact that you experienced trauma. you’ve recovered physically but, have you recovered mentally?”

this part here along with her reassuring him that there’s nothing wrong with his brain, how childhood trauma can have an impact on how your body responds to stress & how you act in your social life, the usage of the word “cortisol” too. this stuff being in a children's tv show is incredible. the writing for priyanka describes trauma simply enough for kids to understand, but for adults to fully realise too. folks, steven has ptsd. there wasn't one bit of sugarcoating about it or nothing, this is canon fact & it hurts me. for so long have I wanted steven’s emotional issues to be alked about, to not only be brought to steven’s attention but to the audience’s too.

everything that has happened to him has built up to this moment. this moment where his behaviour & coping methods are finally making sense to a large majority of the fandom, & to steven himself. he’s hurting; physically, mentally & emotionally, & he isn’t coping well what so ever about it. his emotional support system is complete garbage, no one regularly checks in on him & folks just take steven at face value like “oh yea glowing pink? he’s fine it’s just steven” but he’s the bad person?! I hope a lot of you out there who genuinely believe steven is a bad person re-think yourselves after this. dealing with trauma is tough as shit. some days you even wonder if that one thing that fucked you up is really worth being labelled as trauma. I still can’t believe this is the route they’re taking, if he doesn’t get some form of therapy by the end of future I’ll be furious.

then things begin to spiral as he remembers what happened with connie. he clutches his chest in pain & begins changing size over intense amounts of stress & it was extremely distressing to watch. steven immediately reassures connie that this isn’t because of her, but because of everything else that happened to him. however. I believe that that’s a slight lie, he wouldn’t of spiralled if he hadn’t of remembered the proposal, steven you fucking himbo. he continues to reassure them both that he’s fine, just that he needs them to leave so he can calm himself enough to control himself.

then this happens.

“I. CAN’T. BE AROUND YOU RIGHT NOW!”

this was fucking intense. he means this literally in 2 ways btw. his body size shifting over the stress he’s feeling is a danger to both connie & priyanka in this moment, but it’s also because of how it started. being around connie hurts him. he’s not mad at her though let me make that very clear, just that thinking about what happened when he tired to propose to her is sending his head in a fritz. he did what he did full of confidence in together forever, for connie to then make him realise how silly he was being. these two are destined for each other, but that advice from ruby & sapphire has really fucked with him. he looks up to those 2, looks up to garnet, their relationship is so strong & stable. for them to give him that advice & to then scream “DO IT!” in his face is incredibly tasteless imo.

then greg gets here. I knew connie was calling for either greg or the gems when she was on her phone as she left the room, fuck yea connie I love you. the breathless, strained “thank you” from steven towards connie for calling his dad? g o d. connie telling him she’ll be there for him when he’s ready?! g o d. these next boards were done by rebecca, I knew immediately when I saw steven’s face. it makes sense that rebecca boarded these, because fuck. 

how do I move on from all of the stuff I’ve been through? how do I live life if it always feels like I’m about to die!?

I’m tearing up as I type this. when I first heard the leak of this audio I so badly wanted to believe it, but to also believe it was fake too. I was an emotional mess off & on for about 3 days over it because I couldn't stop thinking about how fucking distressing it was. like… shit steven. he seriously feels this. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain he felt just saying this in front of his fucking dad. he is hurting badly. this boy, this sweet sweet boy we’ve watched grow & develop into the person he is today is distraught about his future & life. it is… soul crushing to watch this. a group of friends of mine have found joking about the episode as a form of coping with the intensity of it & as much as that’s valid as fuck, any joke coming from this episode feels morally wrong to me. I can’t bring myself to join in it feels terrible even thinking about laughing at it to cope. I love them all, but I can’t bare myself to join them. this moment ending with greg comforting steven, telling him he’s here for him & all of his struggles, got me weeping. greg is possible the best father figure I’ve seen on tv, let alone a kids tv show. he’s amazing.

the final scene right here is lovely. greg making steven a hot chocolate & listening to him vent, reassuring him over his worry for his future. this right here is exactly what steven needs. someone to talk to, someone he could trust to talk about his feelings to. this the start of his support system, tag on peri from in dreams, bis in bismuth casual as well as connie from the past few episodes & it’s already looking great! even when greg eased him about being there for him steven still feels guilty about him leaving his tour, leaving his tour because he got a phone call from connie about his son being in need & steven feels guilty about it. fucking hell man. I did enjoy how the episode ended though, with that little moment between the both of them;

“just get some rest kiddo. you don’t have to solve all of your problems in one night.”

“yea. thanks dad.”

it’s a great message too, all of your struggles can’t be dealt with all at once. I’ve used a similar analogy before but it’s like removing a dead tree. you have to deal with all of the little things surround this issue first before you get to the deep, harder stuff. along side the message about trauma they’re both very important messages, I’m glad they exist in the show.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

one more thing before I end my thoughts & feelings over growing pains.

this ending shot;

as soon as I saw the frog mug my mind raced back to the promo for this scene, & this whole moment to come entirely. if you remember this moment has the first set of leaked audio within it, the audio of the gems basically cornering steven about him not opening up to them. christ pearl even gets mad at him for his gem building a wall behind him, protecting him from them. it’s common knowledge, I hope, that steven’s gem reacts to his emotional state. pearl herself has said this;

“I think your gem is reacting to your state of mind.”

his gem building this wall? it felt like steven was being threatened by them. this scene now has awful connotations with it. because since we now know what the pink mode is doing to steven, how actually painful it is, think back to these;

yea. fuck the gems. I’ll let it slide if steven, greg or priyanka haven’t told them about what happened at the hospital. but if they do know, if they know how much it hurts steven being in his pink mode & still press into him about it I’ll see red. with steven’s trauma & now ptsd being cemented into the show I fucking hope garnet, amethyst & pearl get held accountable for what they put on him as a kid. that shit will not slide with me if they don’t. do not condone what the gems put him through. do not condone the gems for making steven feel like he had to be his mum for them. just… don’t. please.

#thanks for coming to my ted talk lmao sdngsjfhg #this episode fucked me up in more ways than one #i dont even think ill simmer down about it before next weeks episodes either #it was… a lot... to listen & deal with #i care deeply about steven as a character #& see it being canon that he has trauma & ptsd… possible c-ptsd #it fucking breaks my heart #god dammit it crewniverse #i hope you handle this with extreme care #i trust you but still… jesus christ #steven universe #steven universe future #su spoilers #su future spoilers

[lord-king-saint]

Processing Pink

Up until the finale, Steven Universe Future had been building up the fact that Steven is actively resisting processing his emotions-- so I'm surprised and shocked that during the finale we don't see any processing on screen at all.

In "Homeworld Bound", Steven flees in shame from the Diamonds, who actively want to understand what is going on with him; but when he returns home after basically abandoning his family, he says he's fine and Garnet just... takes his word for it? Remember her saying: "We will always be your family"? What happened to all that tension and concern?

"Everything's Fine" was such a strange episode because Steven is literally unstable, showing enormous mood swings, and everyone is carrying on and playing baseball like nothing is happening? It doesn't feel like the Steven Universe that I remember. It feels like some... alternate reality where they're milking the situation for humor?

Though I adore Steven's breakdown before his corruption, "I Am My Monster" still doesn't involve Steven processing his feelings. Yes, Steven responds well to physical touch in the show, so The Big Hug was sweet and reasonable. And, like everyone else, I loved that Connie diffused their pity party and focused everyone on Steven.

But then there's a fucking time-skip, right after Steven's beautiful cathartic cry. And after that time-skip, even though the gems had supposedly been very protective, we only see the gems basically neglecting Steven again, so he can move away without guilt. So any real care and emotional processing was done off screen-- and I have a problem with that.

On screen, Steven comes closest to processing his feelings toward his mom in "What's Your Problem", with Amethyst in Fish Stew Pizza. His feelings about Rose are arguably the central conflict in the entire series! So why is this the sole moment Steven has to process his feelings about her?

His conflict with Rose bleeds into his other conflicts as well: his feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, his compulsive need to fix her (and everyone's) problems, his feelings toward being a Diamond, wondering if he's even real or just Rose, the physical and emotional trauma from her enemies, his pattern of being disillusioned and then having to assume responsibility, and even his compulsive need for secrecy!

It's true that Rose is a grey character and that her arc was in reverse, so there's plenty of controversy around this mysterious character. The crewniverse did a fabulous job with her story and perhaps it's a good thing that they leave so much about Rose up for interpretation.

Rose's character is all about deconstructing your idols, and then drawing your own conclusions-- and she's never redeemed. She never resolves things with Bismuth, or the Diamonds, or Spinel, or Pearl-- and she doesn't show up in the finale for Steven to guide him. Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe it wouldn't have been rewarding, no matter how much we crave it.

But Steven's feelings toward his mom is another story. I am so confused why they hardly addressed them on-screen. It was literally horrific to watch Steven's downward spiral, but the fact that no one said aloud, "That's a lot of pressure and I'm sorry" does not sit well with me. People with PTSD and Atlas Complexes need hugs, but they also need to have their feelings validated-- and that is never done for the audience to see.

The show is applauded for its careful depiction of trauma, but no one takes the time to validate the pressure that Steven is under. Not even a little. His realization that he isn't Rose in "Change Your Mind" is probably the most gorgeous moment in the show-- but Steven turned into a monster because he thinks he should be over it, but he isn't.

The reason why people like Steven are so lonely is because they live in another dimension from other people. He compulsively makes people happy, but his complusion for secrecy that he inherited from his mother, makes him unable to be present and happy too. It's torturous to actively make people happy but then still feel alone, surrounded by smiling faces.

Steven doesn't need to be fixed. He needs to be seen for what he's going through, and told that it's okay to feel what he feels-- even if it's confusing. Especially if it's confusing! People watching at home need to know that too. Even though Steven actively resisted being seen and validated, it definitely needed to happen after he turned into a monster and tried to "hug" the temple to death.

Amethyst was the real MVP in the show for Steven, but even she would continually remind Steven to stop fixing, without addressing his underlying feelings on-screen. Both of them are the byproducts of a non-structured "hippie" upbringing, where the parental figures were running from stricter family structures, but emotional neglect still happens in alternative family units.

That is why Greg couldn't help Steven. He made himself available and was endlessly supportive, but he never validated Steven because he never tried to see what Steven refused to show. Greg probably thought it would make him an intrusive authority figure like his parents by prying, but it was still bad parenting. Maybe if Greg showed more initiative and concern, Steven would have seen that his problems were valid.

While I was watching Steven's breakdown escalate, I was on the edge of my seat, waiting for the moment when the gems and Connie and everyone would finally see Steven and validate him. Steven doesn't know that his mother issues are important, but they are, and validation would mirror back to Steven that it's okay to be confused and angry with Rose.

Because she's gone, he might not ever resolve those feelings toward her, but someone still needed to tell Steven that they see him, and that his mother issues are valid and important, and that they support him. It's not going to solve his problems-- it isn't a substitute for therapy-- but it's an important step. Since the gems were so neglectful before, it would have been amazing to get even a glimpse of that in the finale, and I'm disappointed that it will never happen.

I love that everyone finally saw Steven. I love that the gems were protective of Steven. And, I'm happy that he finally got the care that he needed. I just wish even some of it was on-screen. It makes seeing my boy go... bittersweet.

#steven universe #steven universe future #steven #su #suf #suf finale #steven universe spoilers #steven universe future spoilers #su spoilers #suf spoilers #rose quartz #pink diamond #garnet #amethyst #pearl #greg universe #rebecca sugar #su critical #su criticism #su critique #connie #writings

[mimik-u]

“Everything is Fine” Thoughts:

Ooooh, so we’re picking up right where we left off from “Homeworld Bound.”

Steven having a huge ass Lonely Blade poster in his bedroom where the only thing you can read is lonely is thematically astute.

AUGH, the “Full Disclosure” ringtone. It’s so catchy.

Steven’s trying to do what the title implied he was going to do and insist to everyone that he’s great, fine, perfectly okay when he’s literally glowing pink. 😭

“I should go. I don’t want to wake up the gems.” “But they don’t even sleep!” NDDJSJS

UGH, THE TV DISPLAYING HIS THOUGHTS.

DIAMOND PUPILS.

Oh, and now he’s just... oh, my god... trying to disassociate from his actions by denying them, the pain of what he did and thought about doing too much to bear. My god, this show

His declaration that he’s fine literally cracks glass. 😭

I love the little detail of Pearl tripping on the last step in her haste to get to Steven. There’s something so remarkably Pearl-like and human about the moment.

STEVEN. 😭😭 Watching him double down on his insistence that everything’s fine while the Gem’s distraught is written all over their faces is just... oh, my God. Garnet even brings down her visor which is always the clearest sign of her vulnerability.

Peridot’s horticulture class!!! Volley!!! Was that our Aquamarine????

Nope, not our Aquamarine!

“Amethyst says you’re on a strict no plant friends policy!” God, the implications of this line. We’re so enmeshed in Steven’s POV this series, that we don’t see the conversations that are taking place about him when he’s not around. And from this line alone, we get the sense that Amethyst has talked to Peri about Cactus Steven.

OWOEROOFDJNDEJJEJSJD, THE PLANT STEVENS JUST BURSTING OUT OF THE GREENHOUSE.

Garnet as a couples therapist, omg!!!

“Alright, see you next week.” KEDIDJSJ

Garnet, upon seeing that she would be fighting Steven, even plant versions of them, lowers her gauntlets. Oh, my go d 😭

AW, that one plant Steven who tried to hug him before he nyoom’d out.

I’m really glad that the Crewniverse found ways to inject some levity into this one. I think if the angst had been unmitigated, I would have burst into tears a minute in.

Yellow Pearl in armor!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE SOUND PEARL MAKES WHEN HE BREAKS THE ANVILFLDLDDJJFJD

“NOOOO, MY ANVIL. MY BEAUTIFUL ANVIL.” IWIEEODDOSOS. Bismuth had a line like this in the movie where someone wrecked her beautiful work, so I now declare her the cabbage man of SU.

“I did it... I didn’t mess anything up.” 😭😭

And then he promptly messes things up, causing four times as much damage than the baseball flying through the window would have done.

REBECCA, LET MY BOY LIVE.

The plant Steven carrying Little Larimar. 🥺

When Steven warps back, his entire family is waiting for him: Greg, Connie, and the Gems.

Garnet’s pose and expression kills me. The way she’s looking down, elbows on her knees.

“I broadcast my subconscious these days. It’s really no big deal.” My godkdodjdjdiejdiissisj

His subconscious made him a Tiktok meme.

“HOSPITAL? WHEN WERE YOU IN A HOSPITAL?” OH, MY GOD.

“I only actually shattered Jasper.” And everyone’s breath just gets taken from their bodies.

My God.

“I can just keep fixing things forever, and you’ll never have to know or think about any of it.” Because that’s what he did all throughout the main series—fixed other people’s problems and steadily accumulated trauma because of it. And because it wasn’t external, because he was so good at compartmentalizing most of his sadness and hurt away, people didn’t know. People largely didn’t think about it. Even us. The viewers.

Holy fucking shit.

“How messed up is that? That I’ve gotten away with this for so long.”

“I’m a fraud. I’m... I’m a monster.”

This show. My go d

#steven universe #Pearl #garnet #amethyst #s: future #mimiku

[manicdragondreamgirl]

I haven’t had chemistry since like 2008, and I’m also an idiot who likes to make my friends upset, so I rated the periodic table in order to tilt my friends:

Hydrogen - this is like your childhood friend who has always been with you more or less and always will be down to get a drink and chill even tho you haven’t spoken in years. Solid bro imo 7.5/10

Helium - always down for a good time, even if probably created Alvin and the Chipmunks which in some places is considered a war crime. 4/10

Lithium - Gives me bitchy vibes and is flammable as fuck if I remember. Skinny bitch with an attitude 3/10

Beryllium - idk this sounds like a sailor moon villain lol for that it can have a 6/10

Boron - more like BORONG amirite ha ha wait no seriously I have no idea lol 5/10 clean neutral rating

Carbon - *screaming* 2/10 I will not be taking questions

Nitrogen - cool cool cool tight tight tight 9/10 Nitrogen just is the cool hot chick you wish you were

Oxygen - kid who takes up all the glory for the group project even tho you did all the work, 4/10 for natural charisma

Fluorine - lol what are you knockoff chlorine lmfao bitch 3/10 reminds me of the dentist

Neon - I can vibe with this boy for his contributions to signs which cause my eyes to scream 8/10 modernized Art Deco thanks you

Sodium - 10/10 this is me and I won’t be taking questions next element

Magnesium - magnesium is a close relative of magnificent and therefore I think the case is closed folks 9/10

Aluminum - 10/10 for providing a home to my Diet Coke addiction I’d be dead without you

Silicon - 6.9/10 :smirk:

Phosphorous - This has a very soundly name and it’s welcome to do that but idk, not a fan, seems like he’d be smelly, 2/10

Sulfur - 1/10 pretty sure that dog farts are purely comprised of this and as such if I was leaving negative ratings I would

Chlorine - 7.8/10 for being in pools so we could swim without brain eating amoeba in the south you a champ

Argon - he seems like a nerd jk this guy has a good color 9/10 for just being himself

Potassium - I hate bananas and this word gives me the physical sensation of biting into one but only by thinking of abstract letters and making them into something which we can nutrientise from bananas and to me that shit is bananas, b a n a n a s — 3/10 for making me sing hollaback girl thru adhd word association

Calcium - hm my brain went to mega milk so you get a 2/10 today bud I don’t make the rules

Scandium - pretty sure this is fake lol what’s next faxdium, e-Mailite and copinium? 5/10

Titanium - this song’s a banger and also is the only thing that lets me wear earrings 10/10

Vanadium - if your erection lasts for longer than like idk it’s supposed to then don’t take vanadium wait what do you mean it’s not an ED treatment 4/10

Chromium - decent bloke shame the browser eats all your memory 5/10

Manganese - if a weeb tries to tell me how to pronounce mayonnaise one more time... 1/10

Iron - excellent tool against the fey, in your blood, what a bro, 10/10 this bitch slaps

Cobalt - has a powerful energy; I respect him. 8/10

Nickel - if I had a nickel for every time someone made this joke lol 5/10 he’s doing his best

Copper - taste bad 3/10

Zinc - isn’t that the dude in the green tunic and white tights who saves premcess Lelda or something lol 7/10 those games are good

Gallium - seems like a prick 4/10

Germanium - sounds like a child pronouncing geraniums which are superior 3/10

Arsenic - bad vibes coach 1/10

Selenium - isn’t this just sailor moon lol 10/10 love this bitch

Bromine - farmine wherever you aremine - 9/10 I love a good bro

Krypton - he’s okay I guess 5/10

Rubidium - yet another Steven universe villain who will be redeemed I imagine 4/10 seems a bit dull

Strontium - I feel nothing when I see this lad’s name and that seems like a shame 1/10 I don’t like it

Yttrium - this is an atrium in Yharnam, or something 8/10 would love to sit in one and make contact with higher beings

Zirconium - oh wait THIS is the sailor moon villain from the dead moon circus! 9/10 I enjoyed that arc

Niobium - seems sassy, I like that in an element 7/10

Molybdenum - I hate this one, rancid. 1/10 for making me have flashbacks to difficult Ancient Greek vocabulary there is no fucking way that sound combination is anything but Beta and Delta borking and then Latin being like oh imma steal that

Technetium - 6/10 decent name but seems a bit forced

Ruthenium - 5/10 kindly old lady element I guess lol

Rhodium - 10/10 this ain’t my first rhodium babee this lad has good vibes what a name what a king

Palladium - 10/10 for making me think of paladins

Silver - 12/10 I’m breaking the rules for this silver is the best it is so cool and also it is the other best tool for dealing with supernatural creatures when iron has failed you highly suggest Even if I am extremely allergic to it going into my ears...wait hold on

Cadmium - 2/10 sounds like a total douche

Indium - 8/10, i just think it’s independent and neat

Tin - 10/10 good ear sounds when involving rain and roof shapes and automatically reminds me of Nora Jones’s come away with me album which is also 10/10

Antimony - 7/10 decent protagonist good name all around seems rad

Tellurium - tell ur mom what? That’s so early 2010s league of legends humor bro 2.5/10

Iodine - strikes fear in my soul from having it poured on my wounds but this is why I have more pain tolerance than god 5.3/10

Xenon - I think this is a declension of Xena warrior princess which is a win in my eyes, 8/10

Caesium - kind of has a cunty Latin name, 4.5/10

Barium - yeah boss, bury’im! 7.5/10 I love a good mobster gag

Lanthanum - A bit pretentious on the Tolkien spectrum sorry bud 3/10 sounds like you’d be the dickwad elf everyone hates

Cerium - 6.5/10 I like this one, gives me a clean vibe

Praseodymium - the fuck who sneezed all their alphabet soup onto the paperwork and called it an element Christ we can’t keep doing this 1.5/10

Neodymium - oh my god what did I just say 1/10

Promethium - thank Christ we’re back to greek 9/10 Prometheus was a Chad I could get behind

Samarium - 5/10 gives me boring wizard vibes

Europium - 4.5/10 don’t rename opium chrissake can’t take these nerds anywhere

Gadolinium - 5/10 it’s a starship knockoff but it’s trying to be bold with the G sound

Terbium - 2/10 I don’t vibe with this one

Dysprosium - sounds like an antidepressant that has a lot of shitty side effects 3/10

Holmium - sounds like someone anxious asking their beloved to hold them 8/10 I like hurt/comfort fics

Erbium - you can’t just describe something as herby you daft bastard 2/10

Thulium - sounds like a spell I like it 8.5/10

Ytterbium - macguffin in a shite sci-fi show that gets highly overrated because BBC produced it and superwholock stans emerge and go utterly feral 1/10

Lutetium - bards are an element I agree 10/10

Hafnium - sounds like a river (my dog) sound and has a cute vibe, I’d offer it head pats 7/10

Tantalum - noooo you can’t be sad yuor so sexe haha 6.9/10 tantalizing

Tungsten - 10/10 this is a lad with history

Rhenium - 5.5/10 it’s ok

Osmium - 4/10 I wasn’t a big wizard of oz fan

Iridium - 9/10 sounds like iridescent and that’s in my top 10 favorite words and concepts

Platinum - 10/10 best Pokémon game

Gold - 7.9/10 all that glitters and all but it’s still pretty on some people, silver is better tho

Mercury - yikes 8/10 so it doesn’t kill me

Thallium - sounds like the brother character in a ps4 exclusive western rpg that oddly falls under the radar in terms of reviews and gets shafted at awards for no reason 7/10 I’ll support you tho

Lead - 2/10 that’s gonna be a no from me dawg pretty sure I still have lead in my hands from stabbing myself with my mechanical pencils

Bismuth - 6/10 sounds good in mouth and reminds me of biscuits for some reason, I’ll take it

Polonium - to thine own self be true so stop trying to act like the arts don’t influence science jk pretty sure this is named for Poland but hey that’s where we get the Witcher so you get a pass 6/10

Astatine - 1/10 I don’t even know what you are

Radon - 7/10 this motherfucker knows his shit and how to party, rad is right

Francium - I bring you francium...and I bring you myrdurdium... 7/10 for a good vine

Radium - killed the video star probably 9/10 I can get behind her

Actinium - as opposed to passtinium I prefer actinium in the voice of writing 8/10

Thorium - overrated Norse god 5/10 because lightning is still cool

Protactinum - sounds like some pretentious condom brand 4/10 wouldn’t do it with a dude who bought these

Uranium - I always thought she was a hot sailor scout 10/10

Neptunium - same for her I knew they weren’t cousins you couldn’t lie to me 4kids 10/10

Plutonium - sounds like a macguffin unfortunately 5/10

Americium - I read this with a pivotal letter missing and nearly died, 7/10 for the laugh

Curium - 10/10 gives me Curie vibes and also reminds me of curiosity which reminds me of—[old yellered before the association could set in]

Berkelium - what I shout when I want Burke (fam dog) to slaughter innocents and raze territories 2/10 world was not meant to know his commands

Californium - 1/10 California is cool with geography but probs could stand to chill with the ego sorry to my friends in Cali

Einsteinium - 6/10 it’s alright but we’re really running out of ideas huh

Fermium - 3/10 this one is porny

Mendelevium - 1/10 my brain didn’t like parsing this and I stand by my earlier statement of running out of good names

Nobelium - 0/10 you didn’t name any noble gases this cowards this gas can’t be a noble oh wait it’s NOBEL I take it back 5/10 seems an alright chap

Lawrencium - fear the old blood my sorry dead hunter’s ass I’ll never get back my life from the hours I spent trying to beat this lava shitting bastard 2/10 for being a boss who eats Taco Bell specifically before being challenged to have fresh lava shit with which to punish you for having the audacity to exist in his space

Rutherfordium - my god what a snob 4.2/10 I respect him a little but only because he sounds like a right lad

Dubnium - DROP THE BASS 10/10

Seoborgium - not sure about this one but it can have a 7/10

Bohrium - as an American English speaker this sound combination makes my pathetic throat become a black hole as I try to properly create the sound of it 10/10 I love when my body becomes a massive void in the universe

Hassium - lazy 2/10

Elements 109-118 can go fuck themselves I hate them all, collective 6.66/10 for their general demonic vibe

#the periodic table #made by an idiot #it’s me your manic dragon dream girl #long post

[sagebaileyspeaks]

Now that I’m done crying

Season One, Episode Thirteen: Together Forever

This was like watching a slow-moving train wreck. You could clearly see the gears turning in Steven’s head and how it made sense to him (and Ruby and Sapphire who are Gems, but should’ve known better) but my god, once the song started an unfiltered amount of cringe started to fill my body.

Steven is sweet. The song - at face value - seems sweet. However, if you actually listen to what he’s saying, Steven is admitting to having no real sense of identity outside of Stevonnie. And like Pearl or Amethyst, who constantly wanted to fuse with Garnet, Steven wants to be with Connie at this point in time because it makes HIM feel secure. Not because it’s right for him, not necessarily because he wants to, but because he doesn’t know anything else to do with himself. Not a great reason to fuse. Definitely not a great reason to fuse permanently at SIXTEEN. 

And good on Connie for saying no. The relationship is cute and I want them to be together, but this was not it. I appreciate that Connie even tried to check in with him emotionally afterwards, but...glad they went that route. 

Although that said, watching Steven fall into a ditch and cry for hours was an emotional assault on my person and I am not okay. 

Season One, Episode Fourteen: Growing Pains

In “Together Forever” the second Connie gets off the phone, Steven stops smiling. In “Growing Pains,” Steven is glowing Pink until his dad picks up the phone. THIS BOY IS NOT EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY AND IS IN NEED OF SUPPORT. 

Also, it occurred to me at some point during this episode that because Steven’s our POV character, it seems like people are randomly missing because Steven feels isolated. For most of Future I’ve been wondering, “Where’s Lapis, or Peridot or Bismuth, or the Cool Kids?” but if Steven’s not hanging out with them and is keeping himself to his house, we wouldn’t see those people or know what they’re doing. 

In essence, we feel their absence as much as Steven does. 

To the episode: damn. They sugar coated NOTHING. All those light-hearted adventures from Season One? Trauma. All the discovering of new gem powers? Trauma. Constantly dealing with the Gem’s emotions involving his dead mother? Extreme emotional distress.

I can’t believe I’m saying this but this episode makes me really hate the Gems. Not a permanent sort of hate, but there is something fundamentally wrong with the fact that they took Steven in, put the weight of a war on him and once the war was over, they just moved on. Sapphire and Ruby got married. Amethyst found an extended family. Pearl became more comfortable with herself. They put all of this on a little kid and when they were done and resolved their issues, they just sort of...kept going. 

Clearly, they check in with Steven from time to time but they seem to lack any and all awareness of how their actions have affected him up to this point. The closest we’ve ever gotten to something like that was “Keystone Motel” but immediately after Sapphire brings up that they’ve made Steven feel at fault, it moves into Ruby assuring her and going right back into THEIR relationship problem. 

So to see him so emotionally out of control, coming to grips with his own trauma is hard and incredibly heartbreaking. Even more so, because as he’s hurting he’s telling Connie that it’s okay and it’s not her fault and the thing is - Connie was under no obligation to accept Steven’s proposal but in refusing to acknowledge how much that hurt him, he is fucking himself over. It is okay for Steven to be hurt and upset that she said no and he doesn’t seem to get that so he just yells at her to go. I honestly wonder at this point what her role can be from here. 

But good on Greg. I’m so glad that they brought him back and that he came FOR Steven. For no other reason than Steven needed him and I hope he’s there in the next episode. 

Whew. I am emotionally worn (in a good way) and below is a colorized representation of how I feel after these episodes:

#rebecca sugar #steven universe #steven universe future #suf #suf spoilers #steven universe future spoilers #steven universe spoilers #growing pains #together forever #stevonnie #garnet #su garnet #connie maheswaran #su connie #greg universe

[captainillogical]

Home Ch.2

The domesticity of living with an alien who hasn’t quite had the chance at a normal life.

Distant Lands sequel.

Spinel/Reader

collab with my lovely wife @firstofficertightpants​

The door in front of you is red.

The two of you are standing outside the entrance to, er, what the both of you will now be calling home. It’s.. a strange feeling. You’re excited to be here. And although you’re eternally grateful for the crystal gems for taking you in when you needed it, you’re also happy to be starting a new chapter in your life. 

Pearl should’ve had the last three of your boxes brought up already for you, as you didn’t really feel like doing that all yourself all the way up to the 9th floor if you’re honest with yourself. Your body is still pretty sore in general, especially your legs.

You watch Spinel pull keys out of her pocket and go for the door. 

"Why weren't those in your gem?" You ask as she fumbles with said keys in hand. "I didn't even know you had pockets.."

"Sometimes I forget." She furrows her eyebrows, a bit of her tongue peeking out as she squints, trying to get the key into the deadbolt right. It's kind of comical. "Don't act like you're expecting me to lose 'em already."

"Eh." You shrug, and watch her struggle for a couple more seconds. "Did you want help with that, orrrr,"-

She opens the door, interrupting your sentence with an enthusiastic whoop, and you can see the formidable stack of boxes in the small living room. You take one last look at the long sprawling hallway and the many, many doors on this floor and wonder what your neighbors are like.

"Are 'ya gonna just stand out there or what?" She says from inside the doorway. Looking a bit further down the hall, you can see that one of the doors has several strange notes taped to it - as if there's some sort of weird neighborly interaction going on there.

One of the other front doors opens just as Spinel wraps her hand around your wrist, and she nearly yanks you into the apartment. She slams the door shut behind you almost forcefully.

"You're not even gonna let me introduce myself to the neighbors?" You say, like you had any intention other than to snoop a little. Spinel fixes you with a look. It makes you feel a little giddy when she looks at you like she’s full of impatient affection, which makes you want to be a little obtuse on purpose.

"You can do that later." She folds her arms in slight irritation that you can definitely see in her eyes. "I've been wanting you alone for what feels like weeks now."

"You're a little dramatic," You walk further into the living room, taking note of the small deck outside the sliding glass doors. "It's only been a few days, and we've texted."

“I’m not, and you and I both know that it ‘ain’t the same.” She says from behind you, following you closely. You’re pretending you have no idea what she’s talking about.

You take a peek inside the small kitchen, and you love it. It’s cute. Gems don’t need to eat or store food, but these particular apartments have small amenities in place, as well as a bathroom and bedroom just to keep up with building code. You think it’s kind of hilarious that regular city ordinance gets a say in how aliens should build things, and you kind of wish you were present for the meetings that Bismuth had to have had with them.

You open the fridge, and realize nothing is in there. Oh, right. Of course. You don’t know what you were expecting.

Closing the fridge door, you feel a presence next to you and turn to realize that Spinel is RIGHT there. Like, maybe six inches from your face.

“What,” You say, feeling your heartbeat pick up a little. She’s watching you expectantly, as if she’s waiting for something. “Am I not allowed to check out our place? You’ve already been here for the last few days.”

She takes a half step closer, and grabs your face with the both of her hands to kiss you.

Ah. 

Her lips are soft. 

You won’t lie, you’ve been thinking about her like this on a constant feedback loop ever since the both of you confessed your feelings. 

You exhale out your nose and tilt your head enough to deepen the kiss, and she hums against your lips. She slides down one of her hands to the small of your back, and presses you flush against her, almost possessively. Your face heats up a little at the lack of space between you two.

Your phone dings twice in your pocket, and Spinel makes some kind of displeased sigh against your mouth as if you were even going to answer it. One of your hands finds its way to the side of her face, and you trail it over to the edges of her hairline just to touch more of her. She leans into it automatically. Her hair is soft to the touch, and you wish you could run your fingers through it. 

The hand on your back is searingly hot through the shirt you're wearing, and you can only focus on that and the sensation of her lips on yours.

Your phone dings three more times, and Spinel growls impatiently, and well, that certainly doesn’t do anything to you, no sir.

She pushes you against the fridge, and you’re extremely embarrassed about the groan that comes out of your mouth - she doesn’t seem to care because she’s kissing you a lot more forcefully now. It’s like she can’t keep her hands off you. 

“Spinel,” You pull away to breathe, lips wet. She goes right for your neck.

“What?” She hisses against your skin, and you shudder. A gloved hand slides up your shirt.

“I should probably run to the store for a grocery trip before it closes, there’s no food here and I’d like to eat this week.”

She pulls her mouth away from your skin, and your neck feels a little exposed.

“Can’t we do that tomorrow?” She sighs, giving you another look.

“If I wanna starve tonight, sure.” You reply, deadpan. It's not like you actually want this to stop..

“Uggghhhhhhhhhh FINE.” She rolls her eyes, and removes herself from you like it’s the worst thing to ever happen to her. “But we’re continuin’ this later.”

“You mean I’M continuing this later,” You poke her right in the gem, and she glares at you. Her cheeks tint a darker pink, and you find yourself grinning. “If I have anything to say about it, anyway.”

“Is that a challenge?” She replies, lowering her eyes at you in a way that makes the little hairs on your neck stand up. 

“Maaaaaybe.” You side step her, walking back towards the living room before you decide that actually yeah, maybe fucking her in the kitchen is a great idea right now. 

“I hate the tone you’re using.” 

“Why, does it make you nervous?” You open one of your boxes of clothes, looking for a sweater to wear out. A specific one. The one with the strawberries on the front. 

“No, you’re just smug.” She says, and you bark out a laugh.

You can’t find the sweater you want, which means you put it in a non-clothing box, or you left it at Steven’s. Ugh. Actually most of the clothes you’re rifling through kind of smell weird even though they should be clean. You shrug, coming to the conclusion you’ll also have to do laundry tonight.

“Do we have a washing machine?” You ask her. She looks at you a little confused.

“A what?”

“Y’know, like for washing my clothes. These smell funky and I’d like to wear something tomorrow.” You open one of your regular boxes, but it’s just filled with books. Many, many books.

“Oh! Yeah, Bis mentioned something about there bein’ one on the first floor. Although, I wouldn’t exactly mind ‘ya not wearing anything tomorrow.” She grins, canines shining in the low light of the apartment. 

“I’m not walking around naked, idiot.” You sigh at her, trying to keep your blush at bay. She’s so blunt with her affections now that you don’t really know how to deal with it. “Let’s just go to the store and get it over with.”

You grab your bag, making sure you have your wallet on you, and the both of you head out the door.

Spinel locks the door behind you, and the both of you make your way back down to the base level via elevator.

-

There’s a nearby market that’s still open for the next two hours, and the two of you end up walking there as it’s only a couple of blocks away. 

You look over at the neon sign saying ‘Open’ with the hours listed, and can see quite a few people and gems inside. Eugh. You were kind of hoping it wouldn’t be busy at like, 7pm, but here we are.

“I hope this won't take too long,” You head inside, Spinel trailing next to you. “I don’t even think you have toilet paper, so I’m gonna have to get quite a few things.”

“Toilet paper?” 

“Exactly my point.” You look around, seeing the cash registers at the front and the produce section immediately to your right. It’s.. a little loud in here.

Spinel is looking around in curious wonder, staring pretty hard at some of the sale display signs with obnoxious print.

You grab one of the carts off to the side, and make a beeline directly for the toiletries section, because you don't want to forget anything like you usually do.

"Hey! Don't leave me behind," You feel a hand grab yours, Spinel jogging briefly to catch up with you. "Why are 'ya being so fast? We've got time."

"Sorry, stores make me a little anxious when they have quite a few people in them," You narrowly avoid a few teenagers joking loudly and passing next to you. "I hate busy places."

"They ain't so bad. It's kinda lively." She replies, squeezing your hand. 

You pass four different aisles until you get to the one you're aiming for, having to maneuver around a couple gems that are in the way. You catch one of them looking pointedly to the hand you're holding with Spinel, and you try to ignore the way it makes your stomach lurch a little. 

You hate shopping.

You stop your cart in the toothbrush area, because you might as well get a new one as well as some toothpaste.

"Ooooooooh." Spinel reaches out beside you, grabbing one of those sonic kids brushes with all the lights. "What does this do?"

You grab what you need, throwing it in your cart and looking at your girlfriend (even just referring to her like this inside your head makes you unbelievably giddy) who's.. intensely studying the characters on the toothbrush. She presses the button in the middle, and the whole thing lights up and starts playing music. Her eyes go wide.

"Is this some 'kinda torture device?" She pokes the spinning bristles, eyebrows shooting up inquisitively. She then presses it against her face, and her reaction to it is immediate unpleasantness, and you laugh at her.

"It just cleans your teeth, weirdo." You grab it from her, turning the annoying music off and placing it back onto the shelf. "Although, I bet I could find a way to torture someone with it."

"Let's test it on Peridot." She grins, eyes a little gleeful.

"Do you really want to try her? See what she's capable of?" You ask her, trying to stifle your laughter.

"Oh, jeez, 'ya probably right. Pretty sure she'd tie me to a chair and make me watch reruns with her." She answers disdainfully. “Maybe Lapis, then.”

“If you want to drown, sure.”

She continues to peer at the many kid’s toothbrushes on this shelf, and you walk a couple feet over to grab shower supplies. You toss a couple more objects into your cart, nabbing a pack of toilet paper as well and tossing it in.

“What’s this?” You hear her ask, and when you turn to glance at her she’s got a bottle in her hand. It looks like some ibuprofen or tylenol.

“Painkillers. Toss that in the cart will you?”

“It.. kills pain?” She stares at the bottle. “Why do humans need doctors if they have this?”

“They only temporarily ease pain. Mainly for headaches and a sore back and stuff.”

“You meatbags come up with some weird stuff, there’s so many different types..” She grabs another couple bottles, squinting at them and them placing them back on the shelf.

“Yeah, well us meatbags had to create solutions to make our lives a little less awful.” You roll your eyes at her terminology. “Not that I’d expect a fucking rock to understand.”

“A fucking rock,” Her mouth is agape in offence, and she crosses her arms in a huff. It’s so fucking cute. “At least I don’t gotta eat.”

“You could. I bet you’d liiiiiike it.” 

“Yeah I’m ‘gonna pass on that one.” She scrunches her nose, as if the thought is wholly unappealing. You want to laugh.

“You liked sex.” You say bluntly, giving her a knowing look. She sputters, cheeks turning a much darker shade of pink.

“Shut upppppp! We’re in public, Y/N!” She glares at you, and you can’t stop yourself from grinning. 

A couple turns their cart into the aisle you’re in, and you decide to say nothing further.. For now.

You push your cart out of the aisle, Spinel instantly grabbing for your hand again. You like that she just does it whenever she wants to. 

You’re in the refrigeration section, and there’s a couple people here much to your displeasure. Some lady is loudly talking on the phone with one of her kids on speaker, and you glare a couple daggers her way even if she can’t see it.

Side-stepping a gem, you grab a block of cheese and some butter and you’re looking at the eggs when Spinel scoots right up to your side. She places her chin on your shoulder, and watches you open a carton to check the contents. The gesture has your heart doing a couple flips inside your ribcage.

“What ‘cha doooooin?” She inquires quite cutely, and you realize this probably looks weird to her.

“Trying to get a full, non cracked container of eggs.” You state. She grabs one from the open container you’re looking at. “Careful, only the outside is hard. The inside is kinda fluid-like.”

She squints at it in her palm. “That sounds disgusting. You eat these things like this? ‘Aint that crunchy?”

“You don’t eat it raw, normally.” You shoot her a quick look, and she’s looking at the egg like its existence disturbs her. “Most people cook them or add them to other things for consistency. Stop being so judgemental.”

“I’m not being judgemental..” She mutters, placing the egg back into your carton. This one’s got an egg that looks like it’s about to crack so you decide to put it back on the shelf. The woman talking on the phone near you howls out a laugh. “That lady sure is ‘annoying.” Her breath tickles your neck, and you hold back a shudder. 

“Yeah, I hate people like her. It’s fucking rude honestly.” You mutter back, grabbing a different carton. The last three had eggs missing, weirdly enough. Are people just taking single eggs and sticking them in their pockets? “Like how hard is it to just place it against your ear? Why do the rest of us give a shit about what you’re eating for brunch tomorrow?” Spinel chuckles, vibrating against your shoulder. “I ever tell ‘ya that you’re amusing?”

“No, but I’ll remember that next time you call me unfunny.” This carton has all eggs intact inside, so you place it gently into your cart. 

“Psssshhh.” She replies, and you move over to grab a half gallon of milk. You open the door to where all the milk is refrigerated, and Spinel makes a weird noise of disgust. “What the fuck is that? Why’s it white?”

“It’s just milk.” You give her a look. “And it’s white because of the proteins, chill. It comes from cows.” You point to the cow on the carton of 2% you’re buying. “Fucking judgey-ass gems..”

“That animal is in there??” She makes a face. “You guys are so weird.”

“No, idiot,” You laugh, trying to not lose your shit at her conclusions. You point to the udder. “They produce it, it’s not their flesh. Humans can do it too..”

“Can you do it?” She stares at you strangely.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” You say, not wanting at all to elaborate on this and she barks out a laugh. You put the milk in the cart.

You’re in the bread aisle trying to figure out what kind of bagels you want, and Spinel is.. deeply studying the colorful bag clips hanging off the display strip on the side. You hear her grabbing the package and snapping the clips like crab claws, and you can’t help but snicker a little to yourself. 

She doesn’t seem to notice when you wander off to the other short bread aisle, because there's a few more options here that you want to look at. You missed bread so much that you’re feeling like you could eat all of them.. So you grab three different kinds to toss in the cart.

“Y/N?” You hear shuffling from the other aisle, and the rising panic in Spinel’s tone. “Where’d you go..?”

You walk back over to where you left her, and she looks slightly stressed out. She makes eye contact with you and visibly relaxes immediately.

“Sorry, I was just grabbing something from the other side.” You say to her, and her hand shoots out to grab onto your arm. “I wasn’t going to leave you, if that’s what you’re worried about..”

You raise an eyebrow, and she rubs the back of her head, embarrassed.

“Sorry, I know it’s irrational.”

You move your hand to lace your fingers with hers in comfort, palm fitting nicely against it. She seems a little taken aback with your gesture, but she doesn’t say anything by it.

“It’s not irrational.” You squeeze her hand, and seeing no one else around you, you lean in to give her a kiss on the cheek. 

“Y/N!” She hisses, looking around the aisle frantically as a small blush forms on her face. She places her other hand against where you kissed, like it’s somehow sacred. “In public?!”

“It’s not like there’s anyone around to see,” You can’t help the grin forming on your face. The lines on her cheeks look a little bolder with how flustered she is, and honestly? If you could pepper her face in kisses right now, you would. You’ve got this overwhelming amount of affection you’d like to give her, with nowhere to put it. Not until later, anyway. “God, you should see your face. It’s cute.”

“Will ‘ya shut up?!” She pointedly looks away from you, and you laugh. “I’m not cute.”

“I’ve got loads of proof that you are, but okay.” You give her hip a little bump, and her face looks back to yours to shoot out a glare that you’re not intimidated by in the least.

“Yeah, like what.”

“You know..” You trail off, and lean in close to the side of her face. You whisper something to her about the other morning, and she chokes, face going completely red. 

“I’m going to KILL you one of these days, Y/N.” She retorts, avoiding your eyes on purpose. You give her another nudge, and you can see her try desperately to stop the grin forming on her face.

“Let me at least finish shopping,” You reply, grabbing your cart to swing around to get a few more things on your mental list.

It doesn’t take that long to get the other staples you need, and before you know it you’re standing in line at checkout. You start placing your items on the belt once the other customer is finally paying, and you watch Spinel as she hilariously just tosses the items out of the cart and onto the conveyor. Ahhhhhh yeah you knew she wasn’t exactly graceful, but still.

“You find everything you need?” The cashier makes small talk with you, as you see her eyebrow raise at Spinel’s heart-shaped gem. Said gem seems utterly fascinated by the clerk’s bagging speed. 

“Yeah.” You politely answer, grabbing for your wallet as you watch the total rise. You maybe need another job, ugh..

Spinel raises an eyebrow and looks like she's about to say something asinine, so you step on her foot lightly to shut her up.

She yelps a little, and glares at you. You stifle a snicker, finishing the transaction so you two can get out of here. 

Once you're done, Spinel makes the effort of just placing the bags of groceries inside her gem conveniently, so you don't have to carry anything the short distance home. 

-

You don't give yourself the chance to relax much though because as soon as you get home and the groceries are put away, you've left Spinel to unpack your stuff as you go do a quick load of laundry.

The elevator dings and you're on the first floor again, hamper in hand. Opening the door to the communal washing room, you see several units here. There’s no one else around, and you’re so glad for that, honestly. Now you can look at memes in peace.

You fit all your clothes in one load thankfully, and you lean against the machine in wait after you fill what you need with soap. The wash cycle shouldn’t take too long, and you’ll go back upstairs briefly to help your girlfriend after you leave it on the drying cycle. You’re maybe in here alone for five minutes when a man and a giant basket of laundry comes in grunting. It’s another human.. You try not to stare too much.

“So, you live here?” He turns to say to you after dumping half his clothes in the machine in front of him. Of course he’s chatty.

“Yeah. Just moved in today.”

“Sweet, another human here! Now I won’t have to feel so alone.” He replies, swiping his brow lightly. He’s a bit older than you with some dark facial hair, and you don’t know how to say this.. He’s just extremely nonthreatening. “I live up on the 5th floor! Convenient for me since I work nearby, and the rent is so cheap..”

“How long have you lived here?” You ask, typing out a reply to Steven’s messages from earlier.

“A few months. It’s not as quiet as I hoped, gems are a bit on the wild side sometimes but everyone’s friendly!” He grins, pouring soap into his machine. “My boyfriend thinks it’s too loud, but he doesn’t pay the rent so he can’t complain. You live here alone?”

A boyfriend, huh? Maybe you can be friends with this guy.

“Nah, I moved in with my girlfriend.” You state, and the man just kinda stares at you for a moment, as he’s putting two and two together, realizing you’re the only two humans in the building.

“Are you dating a gem?” He asks a little apprehensively, and while you think you might be a little offended if someone else asked this way, the look on his face makes it obvious that he’s just extremely curious. “What’s that like?”

“Yes, and uh.” You stop, not knowing exactly how to answer, and the man barks out a laugh at the look on your face.

“You’re the only human I’ve ever met that’s dated a gem. I’m so telling my boyfriend, he’ll freak. He might have a buttload of questions for you next time I see you. Name’s George, by the way.” He holds out his hand in greeting.

“Y/N.” You take his hand to shake it, and the two of you talk for a little while as he asks you a few probing questions.

After ten minutes or so, your load is done and you put it in the dryer, saying your goodbyes to your new human neighbor.

On your way back upstairs, you manage to bump into a gem right as you turn to the hallway into your apartment.

“Oh! Pardon me,” The gem apologises, looking up from their cell phone.

It’s that same Rose Quartz from earlier.

“It’s you!” She says, slightly taken aback, but nonetheless pleased. “What do you happen to be doing here?”

“I live here.” You give her a small smile, and you notice her eyeing you up. Uh.

“That makes me very happy to hear.” She says in a way that kind of makes you a little nervous? 

“Well, it’s nice bumping into you here, I’ll see you around!” You make quick for your door, and she watches you the entire time, smile on her face. 

It gives you a bit of the heebie jeebies.

You slam the door behind you, and Spinel’s excited face greeting you immediately puts you at ease.

#spinel x reader #spinel #steven universe #spinel steven universe #home #my fic #su

[shinneth]

Spill the tea on Stevinel (just because I saw one for conniverse) And yes, I'm not on Anonymous. Because I'm a proud stevinel shipper and no one's going to stop me from loving it, also your blog is cool

And you know what? That’s the right attitude to have! People should be free to express what they ship without shielding themselves with anonymity. I don’t blame the people that do these days - antis are fucking dangerous people - but goddamn, people. It’s fiction. 

So I commend you for shipping Stevinel openly and proudly! Hard to believe it’s actually considered a bold and brave move just to be open and honest about harmless preferences these days. 

That said, I’m sorry it took so long to get to this. I felt you deserved an epic, given how unexpectedly successful my tirade on why Connverse is a shit ship with an undeserved golden reputation was...

But the truth is, even though I’m very much a Stevinel shipper, it’s definitely not my OTP.

And it’s very tricky for me to figure out how to spill the tea on Stevinel in a way that’s distinct from me doing the same with Stevidot.

Because, well, let’s face it: these two ships, beyond being very similar in nature, have also endured identical hardships from the fandom.

All the death threats Stevinel fans get from the raging antis for daring to ship something so “problematic/immoral/wrong/not Connverse”? 

Stevidot fans have been treated that exact same way for years. And still are. For the exact same reasons.

Both Stevinel and Stevidot shippers are valid, but the fandom constantly turns a blind eye to Rebecca Sugar’s husband who also worked on the show outright saying gem x human ships are FAIR GAME.

And also turn a blind eye to the recent interview where Sugar herself stated that the gems are more like AI - a conclusion I and many others deduced ages ago just by how gems are portrayed in the show. 

But by god, they’ll hang on Matt Burnett’s word that “grown gems” are a thing even though canon itself explicitly states that GEMS DON’T GROW.

Just like how despite Maya Petersen outright admitting that Aroace!Peridot is just her headcanon, people treat it like the fucking gospel now.

(no offense to anyone who’s committed to that particular headcanon - I just don’t really see it with Peridot in particular and it’s really fucking stupid to claim it’s 100% canon when the source herself explicitly said it wasn’t)

Well, it’s canon that Spinel kissed Steven and he didn’t turn into dust. And Steven was already well on his way down the path of self-destruction at this point in time; he would’ve gone monster whether this happened or not. 

Also, how often does a character get the “heart eyes” expression for just a platonic love?

If there was ever a scene where Connie or Steven had heart eyes, no doubt most of the pricks would scream “YES!!!! UNDENIABLE PROOF THAT THEY’RE IN LOVE!!!”

But when it’s Spinel, suddenly it doesn’t count? Really?

How convenient.

There’s also the stupid idiots who saw the conceptual development of Spinel in that movie artbook and saw some vague color keys during a conceptual stage and claimed that Spinel was “family” to Steven - which of course must mean “related” and therefore must make Stevinel an incestuous relationship! 

Which is bull. Also shit. It’s already common knowledge that gems don’t work that way. She was the designated playmate for Steven’s mother. Nothing more.

Of course, most gems who come in Steven’s orbit end up being sort of a family to him. 

But everyone seems to have this impression that a gem being part of Steven’s family means they become additional surrogate mom figures.

And yeah no, that’s dumb and wrong. Garnet and Pearl are really the only ones I’d consider actual “mom figures”. Amethyst’s more of a big sister. Everyone else can vary depending on perspective, but I’ve never seen any of the other gems as anything close to a motherly figure for Steven. Any time I see shit about Lapis or Peridot being regarded as “gem moms” to Steven, I laugh my ass off. They are so not moms or any kind of authoritative figure for Steven. Bismuth at best is more of the fun-loving aunt.

There are more roles in a family than just a paternal/maternal substitute. In fact, I believe Steven has considered Connie to be part of his family well before they hooked up in canon.

(as a side-note, I love how people who are allegedly SO squicked out by age gap ships totally pardon Connverse - you guys realize Connie was 14 in Future, right? Possibly 15 depending on the time scale? There’s gonna be a point in the relative near future where Steven is 18 and Connie isn’t - why don’t I hear you assholes angst about that “atrocity”, huh?)

I honestly do consider the CG B-Team as part of Steven’s family, but more in a loose sense. But by that same token, I consider Connie as part of the family in a similar manner. 

Especially since Spinel was shoved off to live with the Diamonds after the movie - and the Diamonds themselves have a very fucked-up relationship among themselves to the point where I honestly hesitate to put a familial label on it at all - it’s extra stupid to try and paint Stevinel as something with incestuous overtones when it clearly doesn’t. 

Spinel does happen to be a perfect representative of how full of shit antis are about age gaps, though. 

While Peridot’s age has always been left vague, we know she can’t be 5K or older due to being an Era 2 gem. Due to her utter lack of knowledge of Era 1 events (or being completely sold on the Diamonds’ propaganda) and her general inexperience with her own equipment - as well as her ability to quickly adapt to Earth - I always headcanoned Peridot as being especially young. Like, younger-than-Steven young. 

Mostly because Peri’s attitude reeks of Gen Z - also because it’d be nice for a change to have a gem who isn’t thousands of years old like literally every other noteworthy gem in the show. We need a representative of gemkind who hasn’t been around for ages. 

Of course, Spinel’s backstory proves that even if they went the boring route and made Peridot thousands of years old just like everybody else, it wouldn’t really mean much of anything. She’d be no less of a valid romantic option for Steven regardless of age.

Spinel is several thousands of years old, and the movie explicitly shows us what exactly that amounts to for a gem.

As I mentioned earlier, Sugar sees the gems more like AI. Spinel remaining in one spot for several millennnia, not moving an inch, not speaking to anyone, not seeing anything other than a gradually-deteriorating garden... yeah, and somehow, despite all that, Spinel’s still very childlike per her design. She had literally no room to mature or accrue life experience: Pink Diamond basically hit the pause button on her entire life.

Even though she’s several thousands of years old, through no fault of her own, Spinel’s mindset remained unchanged. It wasn’t until Steven inadvertently came into her life that she became twisted - understandably so after finally realizing she’d been abandoned by Pink. 

But she still didn’t completely lose her true self. Spinel realized on her own that Steven didn’t deserve to suffer just because his mom was a negligent asshole. She also came to understand on her own that unlike Pink, Steven truly cared for her no matter what shit she threw his way. 

Steven could give Spinel the care and attention she always deserved; something Pink totally denied her while deceiving her into wasting away with her abandoned playground. He could be the one to give Spinel the love she always deserved but was either denied or manipulated into believing she got. 

Honestly, this is more than enough to warrant building something more between these two. 

The age gap is irrelevant. The two have chemistry. They aren’t related.

(and honestly, this is fiction - these details are largely irrelevant in fiction anyway. I’m only bringing it up because it doesn’t take much research to find that every label the antis put on Stevinel is complete inaccurate Diamond propaganda bullshit)

Stevinel is FINE. Let people ship it if they want to!

Um... is that good enough?

Honestly, I’m not gonna lie: Stevinel’s pretty goddamned popular; so much that I’m a bit jealous of it. I enjoy the ship a lot, but I’ve been keeping it at arms-length all this time. I’m looking forward to when I can write my own brand of Stevinel interaction when I get to introduce her in my series, but that’s still a while to go. 

Also, there’s almost zero Peridot/Spinel material, let alone my Peridot/Steven/Spinel OT3. And Stevidot material is still hard to come by; I’m noticing Stevinel’s still quite a bit easier to find by comparison. 

So in a way, I feel many other unpopular ships deserve some tea-spilling sooner than Stevinel because Stevinel at least still has a sizable fanbase. Same can’t really be said for a lot of similar ships here...

A lot of this can apply to other Steven x gem ships, honestly. 

But I guess I haven’t been showing Stevinel much proper love due to my devotion to my superior SU-AU. I can only hope I can soon reach a point where I can have GA Spinel react to Steven, since their dynamic will be significantly different.

(and then one day I’ll finally make the Peridot/Steven/Spinel OT3 fic!!)

Until then, I can only hope I did Stevinel some justice here!

#answered asks #ryan-spinel #stevinel #stevidot #steven universe #spinel #su spinel #shipping #spill the tea #peridot #su peridot

[amalgamau]

Chapter 4

It’s been a while! A lot has gone on! There’s a TON more of you than last time! Hopefully the chapter makes up for it. And if you aren’t caught up I added a handy little set of links to help navigate the chapters of the story! Especially since the early stuff is buried pretty deep at this point. But for now, enjoy the story! May we soon be out of the first day.

Directory First | Previous | Next

“And that about sums it up,” Steven sighs, staring at his family. Looks of horror, confusion, and pain bled onto their faces as they processed the events that led up to this moment. 

Steven takes a breath, then adds,“Blue and Yellow are waiting by the warp pad. We should head over when we’re ready.”

Garnet freezes for a moment, unmoving, then growls lowly.

“I won't do it,” she snarls in seething rage. Everyone turns to her as angry tears stream down her face. “They took everything from us! They took our lives from us. They put us through so much pain. I will NEVER forgive them.”

Steven saddens looking at her.

“Garnet... I know...” he begins but is cut off by Garnet.

“NO! You can’t know how this feels! Dying and becoming a twisted SHADOW of what I was! A reminder of what we LOST!”

Amethyst and Pearl step in front of her.

“¡uʍop ɯlɐɔ 'ʇǝuɹɐפ” Amethyst calls out in her unintelligible gibberish.

“P̴̯͒̌͐l̸̹̥̠̃̊e̶̢͕͛͝á̴̼̃̆s̷͙̩̰͝ë̶̪́̍,̶̺̜̅ ̷͕̹̆b̸͇̥̅͊e̵͔̤̝͋ ̶̨̟̜͑͊̕r̷͙̹͝è̴̩̀̑ả̴̠̈͠s̴̠͗̄́o̵̜̚ṇ̸̬̘̊ǎ̸̫͐b̸̢̒͐l̶̦̯͙͝é̸͍͍̂ ̶̱͖̐G̸͈͈̣̿̚ã̵̟͉̞̈̚r̵̤̮͇̚n̷͔̟̐e̶̩̰̿t̶̯̂̃!̶͚̍͝͝” Pearl adds softly.

“YOU’RE DEFENDING THEM?!” Garnet calls out.

Bismuth steps solidly in between Garnet and the others.

“No. We aren’t,” she states firmly, “but they’re listening to Steven. So while we regroup, we should play along.”

Garnet remains silent, angry tears burn each of her eyes as they stream down her face. Steven embraces Garnet, hugging her tightly. Amethyst and Pearl follow as Steven manages to choke his words out.

“I’m so sorry Garnet... If I had been a little faster or stronger... none of this would have happened...”

Garnet sobs softly, clinging to Steven.

“No... I’m sorry. I... don’t see any timeline where this didn’t happen.”

Steven takes a moment to process this, then clings tighter to Garnet, tears stinging his eyes as he whimpers.

“I just want them to leave. I don’t want anything to do with them.”

Bismuth puts a hand on his shoulder and softly tells him,“We don’t like it any more than you do. But if we want them gone, we have to try something different. Like it or not, this is our best chance to get through this.”

With a long and heavy sigh, Steven wipes away his tears.

“Ok. Let’s do this,” he mumbles, the exhaustion in his voice evident.

The group makes their way out of the now ruined fountain. As Yellow and Blue see Steven step out, they perk up in excitement. However, the moment the newly revived Gems step out, the Diamonds reel back in disgust.

“Stars!” Blue cries out in shock and appall.

“What in the world are those... things?!” Yellow cries out in disgust. The Crystal Gems recoil in a mix of shame and sadness, Garnet specifically turning away to hide her seething hatred. She suddenly freezes with a thousand-yard stare as she becomes locked in her Future Vision, seeing suddenly every horrible thing that might happen in the next exchange. The visions mortify her, so much so that she finds herself frozen in terror. Steven, meanwhile, looks at the Diamonds with a furious gaze that burns holes through their forms.

“That,” he states through clenched teeth, “is my family.”

“Oh my!” Blue gasps in shock.

“Pink, what did you do?!” Yellow asks in shocked horror. 

Steven’s eyes widen with rage.

“What did I do?!” he shouts in anger.

“Yellow, please.” Blue pleads, putting a hand on her shoulder. Yellow ignores her, staring at the gems.

“Those THINGS are abominations! I never should have let you try to heal them.”

Steven’s anger boils over, balling his hands into fists as he tears up.

“QUIET” he howls in anguish. The ground shakes around them as all eyes turn to Steven. “You don’t GET to talk about them. This is YOUR FAULT!” he wails, creating a crater under him. Everyone is blown back as shockwaves whip wildly from him, emanating in a burning energy, his tears fly upwards from the radiating aura.

“My fault?” Yellow gasps in shock at the accusation. “I didn’t make those things!”

“I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT!” Steven shrieks, his crater being dug larger and deeper as everyone stares, dumbfounded. “IF YOU HADN’T COME HERE NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED! YOU HURT THEM! YOU HURT ME! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER FUCKING WORD!” The ground cracks further from the crater as the air whips wildly around him, pushing against everyone.

Bismuth pushes her way towards Steven through the shockwaves and wind as Blue calls out with tears in her eyes, “Steven! Yellow! Please stop!”

Steven ignores her, continuing to scream as if she weren’t even there. 

“NOTHING YOU COULD EVER SAY WILL FIX THIS! IF YOU CAN’T HELP, THEN LEAVE US THE FUCK ALONE!”

Bismuth manages to get past the shockwaves and wind, grabbing Steven and pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Steven! It’s going to be okay! Please! You need to calm down!” she shouts to him through the sound of the winds as she holds him close to her, putting his head to her chest. As Bismuth holds him, his rage melts into anguished sobs. The gems and Connie join in the embrace. Blue and Yellow stare as Steven sobs into the arms of his broken family, the group tearing up in the embrace. Connie finds herself in the middle with Steven and in the embrace, begins sobbing as well as the weight of what has happened fully hits her, all the while the gems hold the two children. Blue turns to Yellow, her eyes wet.

“We hurt her. We hurt Pink,” Blue says tearfully.

“We didn’t know! How could we have? She faked her shattering!” Yellow counters.

“No!” Blue responds. “We hurt her so often on Homeworld. Ignoring her, locking her away when she misbehaved, punishing her in those awful ways. This is just like then!”

She begins sobbing.

“It was for her own good!” Yellow counters as she holds back tears of her own.

“If she was miserable enough to fake her own shattering and run away without any remorse, how much good could it have done?!” Blue sobs “She left to be happy! And she was until we ruined her happiness here, too!”

Yellow slams her fist into the nearby cliff as she begins to cry.

“How dare you use your powers on me Blue! Why would you try to manipulate me like this!”

“I’m not!” Blue responds. “You know I wouldn’t! We have to make this right.” Yellow sniffs as she asks, “And how do you propose, we do that?”

“However we can,” Blue states.

The two return to the broken family, wiping their tears as the sobbing winds down. Yellow takes a deep breath as Blue places an encouraging hand on her shoulder.

“Steven...” Yellow begins in a careful and soft tone. Steven looks up, glaring daggers into her through his red, tear-filled eyes.

“What?” he hisses.

“We...” she starts “I... am so incredibly sorry for the pain that I... we both caused. I know that means nothing... but please know that we both will dedicate ourselves to making this up to you in any way we can.”

Steven remains silent, his expression unchanging as Blue chimes in.

“You are our family. There is no excuse that we can give to ease the suffering we have caused to you and those you care for... but please... allow us the chance to try and make things right in any way we can.”

Steven stares at them for a long time, then looks to the gems and Connie. He speaks up, his voice raspier than before.

“Fine,” he huffs. “If you want to help, then help my family. You hurt them. You fix it.”

Blue and Yellow flinch at the request, then Yellow sighs.

“Steven...” Yellow starts as he resumes his glare. “I promise to do everything in my power to find a way to help them. But the best chance of that are the resources on Homeworld.”

Blue adds, “Our ships were destroyed... we may be stuck here.”

Bismuth speaks up for the first time since the Diamonds approached them.

“I can repair them. It won’t be pretty, but it’ll get the job done.”

Steven looks sadly at Bismuth.

“You don’t have to help them Bismuth,” he says softly.

Bismuth smiles warmly at him then looks up at the Diamonds with a grimace as she speaks.

“Believe me Steven, I don’t like the idea of working on a project for the Diamonds. If it were up to me, I’d send the upper crusts packing a different way entirely.” She slams her fist to the ground to make a point. “But seeing as they want to help. I can put my pride aside to lend a hand.” Blue and Yellow look uncomfortably at the group as everyone gets up.

“Very well,” Blue says softly. “We should depart for the ships and begin repairs.” Bismuth looks at them with a scowl.

“You can start without us. We still have to tend to the things You two made a mess of.” Yellow opens her mouth to speak, but closes it as she reflects on the situation. She walks to the warp pad.

“Very well,” she huffs. “We will begin salvaging the wreck. Tend to whatever you must and offer whatever help you feel so inclined to give.”

With that, the two Diamonds warp away as the Crystal Gems walk to the warp pad. Steven holds Connie’s hand as the two look at each other with unease.

“How do I explain this to my parents?” Connie asks. Steven looks down in sorrow.

“I... don’t know...”

The group looks at each other as Pearl suddenly begins to panic.

“Pearl, what’s wrong?” Steven asks in concern.

“Ǐ̸͉.̵͓̉.̶̻̊.̷̹̎ ̴͈̎Ǐ̵̼ ̷͈̋c̶͉͝a̶̛͇n̸̩̈́'̶̪͑ṫ̸̪ ̶̰̐à̸̗c̵̳͘t̵̹̽ȉ̶̭ṿ̴̑a̷͂ͅt̷̟͝e̶͔̊ ̴͈̉ţ̵͂h̸̦̆e̵͙͗ ̵̺͑w̶͕̐a̴̪̕r̵̳̊p̶̛͙!̸͍̿” she responds in a panic.

Amethyst and Garnet look to each other in concern as they both attempt to do the same.

“I-I can’t either!” Garnet adds fearfully.

“¡ʞɹoʍ ʇ,uoʍ ʇI” comes Amethyst’s terrified voice.

Steven turns around and looks at them.

“Please calm down! Let me try!” he says as the group tries to relax. Steven activates the warp, returning them to the ruins of the Beachhouse.

“I̸̫͋ṫ̸̳ ̶̺͗w̴̖̓o̵̱̓r̸̺̈́k̷̟͑e̷͉̔ḑ̴̿!̶̨̈́” Pearl says relieved. But it is immediately followed by the realization. “̶͍͐S̴̨̓o̷̹͆.̴̯͆.̸̳̎.̷͉̾ ̶͍́ẅ̷̟́a̴̯̋s̴̖͋ ̴̜͝i̵̳͒ẗ̶̩́ ̵͓͝u̶̻͝s̵͔̀?̴̞̑”

Garnet looks at her four hands and wonders out loud.

“What else about us has changed?”

#steven universe #steven universe au #su au #suau #su au amalgam #su amalgam fic #writing #fanfic #emotional whump #su pearl #su garnet #su amethyst #su bismuth #su bismith #su yellow diamond #su blue diamond #su connie #su pink connie #amalgam amethyst #amalgam garnet #amalgam pearl #tw: mental breakdown

[kadomoni]

I always thought I might be bad, now I’m sure that it’s true…

I really can’t tell you what to think of Pink Diamond/Rose Quartz. I can’t. It’s something you have to decide for yourself, but I’m going to explain why she’s one of my favorite characters of the show, but I also think she is the villain.

Now, I know what Pink Stans are saying, “She’s not the villain! She’s morally grey and trying to change!” And, to that I say, yes clearly. She’s an incredibly well-written, nuanced, and complex character. But, as much as she has done good, she has also done very, very bad. And, I’m here to explain why I think Pink is not evil—she’s just bad (and she knows it).

There is no doubt about it that Pink was raised in an abusive family. White is a pretty typical narcissistic parent (over-reliance on perfectionism, wanting people to please her and be like her but no one ever living up to her expectations, trouble with empathy, ect.). Yellow and Blue love Pink but have no idea how to raise her. That’s pretty typical of dysfunctional family dynamics. None of them had a good role model, so they can only replicate a bad role model.

I understand this dynamic. I had a “mother figure” who was very emotionally (and sometimes physically) abusive. My parents were nice and good parents but they had anger issues. I went from being petulant to shutting down, but I think I fit more into a Pearl archetype because instead of acting out my pain, I kept it inside and felt like it was me that was wrong. Pink does this, but not before causing a lot of issues, and often exploding outwards.

((Major Steven Universe/Future Spoilers under the cut))

We’ll start with what we know about Pink, which is very limited.

The first “memory” we have from her is the astral projection dream Stevonnie had where she threw a tantrum about wanting a colony. It was childish, yes, but Yellow response was no better considering she just yelled at her. They both threw tantrums, and no doubt, she was going to get locked up in her tower after. Pink got angry, she punched a mirror (hopefully, she’d only punched mirrors, please, Rebecca, don’t hurt me like this).

Secondly, we have the dream Steven had about Blue, who begged Pink to stop being combative and letting her “organics” loose, but ultimately just ended up admonishing her further. It’s also implied that she had her stay in the tower room.

Also, that tower is even more fucked up than just isolation. @singlepalerose​ explains this in her meta that Gems need light to live, not food. Rebecca says in an interview when asked that she “can’t say” what would happen if put in a place with no light. But, @singlepalerose​ comes to the conclusion that this might be literally akin to starvation, which is torture. There’s a good chance that Pink was literally tortured by her care-givers.

And, poor Pink Pearl. I don’t know what happened, but whether it was a scream or some physical altercation, it was frightening enough that she broke her pearl so badly, it couldn’t be repaired, which as seen in RS’s concept drawings, Pink is really fucked up by this. She becomes more introverted with her feelings because of this.

                                                          Don’t Break This One.

I’m not going to comment on whether these actions make her “bad” or “abusive.” She was clearly a child in an emotionally maladaptive environment, and she did decide to change and to keep her anger and frustration internalized at the risk of harming the people around her.

But, unfortunately, the information after this is where I begin to feel disturbed by Pink’s actions.

She got a colony. At first, she liked it, but clearly, she either grew bored or disenchanted with managing it. I feel as though she was expecting some sort of freedom, when really, the extra responsibilities probably just weighed her down even more.

The events of ‘A Single Pale Rose’ come into play now. Pearl suggested they go down to Earth, and Pink felt her first taste of unrestrained freedom. She liked interacting with other gems, liked interacting with humans, and finally decided that she didn’t want to destroy the Earth. And, she did beg all the Diamonds to let her give up the colony, but not only had Pink kinda shot herself in the foot with this one because she begged so hard for a colony and made so many big scenes about it, White and Yellow are incredibly steadfast in tradition and rules, and this wasn’t going to fly.

So, she decided to take drastic action.

I personally think that the idea to fake her own death was…weird. And, pretty extreme. I understand her reasoning, but this was the first time where she made a decision that benefited her far more than it did others (and I’m not talking about the planet right now because that’s a whole separate thing). This action traumatized Pearl to the point where she doesn’t eat, won’t shapeshift, and can’t talk about it. Yes, I know she commanded Pearl not to talk about it, but this caused significant emotional distress for her later on in the series.

This also traumatized the whole gem race, specifically the Diamonds, because she’d framed it as a terror attack. It would be way different if she stood up to White herself publicly, but there was so much deception going on that it fundamentally changed the course of Gem Culture and the fate of the Earth. Mostly what bothers me here is how manipulative this action was and how unnecessarily complex it was. Pink did everything she could to wipe her slate clean, be seen as a martyr of Gemkind, and also live freely on Earth.

It was a very good way to get her freedom, but it was also extremely harmful to all parties involved.

The War only escalated at this point. They had to fight Homeworld as a full-on army, and countless of gems were shattered.

Now, yes, of course, these actions saved the Earth, which is good in our perspective because we live on Earth. Earth is essential to us because it is our only frame of reference. But, something that continually complexed the Homeworld gems was why someone would fight for one measly planet at the cost of so much. It makes sense to us because we would sacrifice a whole heck of a lot to keep our planet from being invaded by space aliens, but the gems were colonizing tons of planets and destroying them for energy. It was obviously horrible as colonizers are horrible, but it’s sort of like how different armies will invade other countries, but because we’re being told that it’s for good, most people don’t really care.

From the gem’s perspective, this was all a horrible disaster—a loss of countless life, resources, and pride.

And, for The Crystal Gems, the “loss” of the war meant that all of their friends were corrupted, except Rose’s closest friends (which I’m personally unsure if this is completely truthful. I would hope it would be, but it’s also very suspicious because letting only the people that trust her the most survive would make it easier to control her own story).

Speaking of which, wtf is up with her bubbling Bismuth? It just feels like it would be easier to hide her away instead of trying to explain why she doesn’t want to shatter the Diamonds. But, Rose shattered Pink, anyway? I personally believe Bismuth was too close to figuring out her story, and she didn’t know what to do. I can’t think of any other explanation that would explain her actions and make sense with telling the Crystal Gems she’d been shattered. It feels very manipulative and selfish.

All of this obviously traumatized Pearl (we see it in her Pearl within a Pearl within a Pearl), and it had to have traumatized Garnet considering her reactions to mentions of the war and the “fusion” experiments. It was especially bad on Garnet’s end because she thought the war was actually what Rose said it was, which is why she freaked out when it wasn’t.

She kept secrets from everyone, even Her Pearl. But, Pearl didn’t know that she didn’t know everything. You could call Pearl delusional, but I think this is more proof that Rose never did something in front of her that made her feel like she was being untruthful.

And, I said y’all don’t want to get me started on Rose’s treatment of Pearl because I go feral when I get worked up about it. I would like to personally thank @theroguefeminist​ for their meta on Rose/Pearl and Fandom Ableism. It’s super good, and it was the meta that made me finally sit down and watch all of SU way back in the day. But, it illustrates the point that fandoms tend to look down on characters that act “bitter,” “weak,” “jealous,” “depressed,” or “neurotic.” It’s even more sinister because the reason why Pearl acts the way she does in the first two seasons is because she’d been manipulated by Rose.

She was Pink’s Pearl, her partner in crime, her renegade. They were the Heroes of The Rebellion. Pearl admitted she had feelings for her, and Rose’s response was enthusiastic (“Don’t ever stop!”). From what we’ve seen, the disregard of her feelings only began when she started dating Greg, considering Pearl didn’t see “the men who came into her life now and again” as threats because they “didn’t really matter until [him].” But, the treatment that we see of Pearl in “Story for Steven” and “We Need to Talk” is dismissive at best and cruel and uncaring at the worst.

After Greg was trying to flirt with Rose, Pearl said defensively, “I can sing!” and they laughed at her. Even Rose beamed. They were basically making fun of her when Pearl was only reacting that way because she loved Rose and felt threatened by Greg, even at this point.

I do want to add that I think Rose was trying to be a good person by telling Greg to go away. She made a good point that he shouldn’t give up on his dreams to be with her (especially considering that she knew that nothing would become of him in a place like Beach City). But, she was wooed by him. She laughed and gave into her instincts to surround herself with people who look up to her (even Vidalia said something about how Greg worships her).

But, I find Rose’s treatment of her in “We Need to Talk” to be unnecessarily flippant. Obviously, Pearl was very upset during the whole “What Can I Do For You?” song, and her last ditch effort was to show off Rainbow Quartz and try to belittle his efforts, but Greg was rightly defensive. This doesn’t mean Pearl was being “salty” or “abusive” or “bitchy.” She was reacting negatively towards the emotional neglect that Rose was showing her. Of course, we don’t know every interaction that Pearl and Rose had, but it’s very heavily implied that Rose never communicated with Pearl how their relationship was developing.

I do not, I repeat—I DO NOT—think that Pearl was owed Rose’s love. What I think is neglectful about this situation is that Rose didn’t either apologize or properly explain the nature of their relationship. It’s implied that Rose made her believe they were an item and then proceeded to sleep around and eventually find an alternative partner. No one is owed affection with someone who doesn’t want to be romantically involved, but to lead someone on for thousands of years is horrible, and the idea makes me nauseous, especially since the fandom is more likely to blame Pearl even though Pearl was literally her glorified slave and only able to break out of that thought process years after Steven was born.

Pearl was so emotionally fucked up by Rose’s possible emotional neglect that she had several traumatic episodes starting from “Indirect Kiss” and culminating in her “Cry for Help.” She literally believed she was powerless and felt so weak that she thought the only way to feel agency was to manipulate and extort affection from Garnet. I’m also not defending Pearl for doing this, but it’s clear that she did this because she was mentally ill and not because she was knowingly or maliciously disregarding Garnet’s feelings to fulfill her own needs. Trauma episodes often cause you to act in destructive ways towards yourself and others, but it’s also very different from how Rose did disregard the feelings of others to get her way, or have fun, or “play” with people.

It also reminds me of her treatment of Spinel. Pink was having fun with Spinel until they decided to give her a colony, and then, instead of bringing Spinel with her or sending her back to the Diamonds, she told her to stay there, and she abandoned her for 6,000 years with no plans of returning for her. To be fair, it would really mess up the Crystal Gem dynamic if she suddenly returned with a Spinel who was gifted to Pink Diamond. So, in Rose’s perspective, I get it, but as myself, I don’t think it’s right.

Greg, even, I think was taken advantage of. He’s so sweet and trusting and good that she would easily have been able to get him to do anything. I’m not going to go too much into this because there’s not too much evidence besides her behavior towards him in “Greg the Babysitter” and how she laughed at him in “We Need to Talk.” I just have the feeling that Greg knows something that no one else does and that his perma-sunburn might have something to do with Rose and/or Steven’s conception. Don’t take my word for it since this is just a theory, but I do think there’s something we don’t know yet.

Alright, now that most of the character stuff is out of the way, let’s talk Rose symbolism. In almost every episode, there’s a shot of Rose’s portrait with her eyes covered or something obscuring them. This is classic anime imagery of a suspect character, and it’s foreshadowing of her suspect actions. All of her organic experiments eventually go rouge without constant maintenance from Rose (see: the moss in “Lars and the Cool Kids,” the thorns in “Indirect Kiss”). We don’t know why this happens, but it points to the idea that there’s something malignant lurking underneath Rose’s creations.

Rose’s Room also has disturbing implications. The fact that it gives Steven whatever he wants, but more often than not, it turns into psychological horror is telling. It may be that Steven just doesn’t know how to use the room, but also, the Gems didn’t want him to go in there. (“It doesn’t know how to handle a task like that!” What do you know, Pearl????) The creepiest one, in my opinion, was how the Fake Connie he made in “Open Book” eventually turned on him, attacked him, and basically physically forced him to admit feelings he wanted to keep hidden. I’m not saying this is the intended purpose of the room, but I find it troubling that it can be used in this way and defaults to it when there isn’t anything stopping it. It could also be that when the illusion the room makes is broken that it reverts to an angry (and dare I say Pink Diamond-esque) temperament.

My final point is how her decision to have Steven, even though eventually for good, hurt many people, Steven included. To make the decision to die and have a kid was confusing to everyone, but more so, the gems. They don’t understand human reproduction outside of a biological level, and the fact that gems normally can’t sexually reproduce makes the concept even more foreign. It seems like she explained that she was doing it and would die but didn’t fully prepare the gems about what that would entail. I think this is most clearly seen in “Three Gems and a Baby” because the Crystal Gem’s behavior towards baby Steven reflected Pearl’s response to emotional neglect, such as acting impulsively and dangerously just for not understanding the complexities of the situation.

Their whole dynamic was screwed up, and they all felt deeply hurt by Rose’s death. If you compare how they act at the beginning of the series to the end, they were basically all at each other’s throats because they couldn’t communicate properly due to all the undealt with baggage that had been left behind. It ended up becoming Steven’s job to emotionally support the gems when he should have been the one being emotionally supported. This imbalance of “the parents being the child” and “the child being the parents” is a huge reason why we see Steven in such emotional distress during Future. He’s internalized the idea that he should be the leader, the supporter, the helper, and he hasn’t properly been able to find his own identity because Rose looms over all of them (see: “Rose Buds”).

It’s hard to say whether Rose intentionally left Steven to clean up her mistakes or if she just felt like he could fix it all when she couldn’t, but there is no denying that Rose’s actions have seriously messed up our boy. This is the clearest theme presented in the show, so I’m not going to go super hard on this topic because basically the whole show is Steven angsting over his mom.

So, the point of all of this is that, yes, Pink was abused. There is no doubting that she was very badly abused and developed her personality and coping mechanisms due to this trauma. However, Rose has hurt her friends, family, and gemkind due to her actions. A lot of abusers have been abused. I know my abuser was abused in the same way I was, but that doesn’t give her an excuse to enact that abuse on me. It’s the same as Rose. Her bad upbringing gives context about why she turned out the way she did, but it’s incredibly short-sighted to say that Rose acted in mostly good ways towards others.

And, she knows she’s bad. Whether or not Rebecca will outright admit what the song is about, we have enough context to know that “Love Like You” is Rose talking to Greg (if not the other gems as well).

“I always thought I might be bad Now I’m sure that it’s true ‘cause I think you’re so good And, I’m nothing like you

Look at you go I just adore you I wish that I knew What makes you think I’m so special”

Rose is admitting that she thinks she’s bad and isn’t special and doesn’t understand what Greg sees in her. She knows she’s done bad things, but in my opinion, she didn’t do enough to fix her problems. She made Steven instead. It was her final act of avoidance. Maybe she gave up on herself. Maybe she knew she couldn’t “Love Like You.” I don’t know the answer to that. I just know that Rose’s actions were abusive. She’s not good. She’s morally gray. She did good things, but she did many bad things as well. She’s not evil, but she is the series’ antagonist. She has good things about her, but she has many bad things as well. People can be two things. But, saying she’s not an abuser is making excuses for her behavior.

Here are my answers to a few common complaints on my shitpost meme.

Q: Rose didn’t want to cause war! She just wanted to free the planet/have freedom/save the gems, ect. A: If she didn’t want to cause war, she very well could have…not started the war? There are much less destructive options than pretending to be a rebel when she really was a Diamond. The double life thing is so ridiculous, no one in the show could even guess it. Q: Don’t discredit her Rebellion! A: I just think she cared more about herself than she actually did the Earth. The Rebellion did save the Earth, but not without crazy death and destruction. Q: Pink was good compared to Japser, the Diamonds, Lapis, ect. A: All of you saying that those other characters are bad while Rose is good totally misses the point. All those characters did abusive things. So did Rose/Pink. Pink is good and bad. It’s really showing your ass that you hate x, y, z but will cape for Pink even though she’s probably caused the most harm of the entire series. Whatever happened to all those morally grey arguments?

Q: This take is bad! A: soz bruh cry harder Q: This is black and white thinking. A: I shouldn’t have to explain every aspect of a character in a shitpost. This meta is my full explanation, so here’s my morally grey meme uwu

Q: Blue, Yellow, and White are colonizers and also really abusive. A: Yes. It doesn’t negate Pink’s actions, though.

Q: Pink Pearl was an accident! She changed after!!! That’s not abuse!!!!!!! A: Abuse isn’t always intentional, and we don’t canonically know it was an accident. Pink Pearl said that it was, but she admitted she was making excuses for her. But, accident or not, hurting someone deeply can be abuse if it’s not dealt with. Pink Pearl was not dealt with. She was brainwashed for 8,000 years, instead. Pearl-Pearl helped her deal with it. The continual explosive anger from Pink was abusive, hands down.

Q: She’s not a villain! A: She certainly is framed as Steven’s villain. Regardless of what you personally think of Pink, Steven is deeply disturbed and harmed by Rose’s actions. It’s literally the whole plot of the show! If Pink is eventually redeemed, I won’t mind, but she’s irredeemable in my eyes.

#steven universe #steven universe future #pink diamond #rose quartz #su #suf #steven universe future spoilers #steven universe spoilers #su spoilers #suf spoilers #mine #meta #abuse

[suf-lives-rent-free]

Fragments

Everything below is just my opinion; I am in no way trying to say that how I feel about this is the one correct take or whatever.

I know a lot of people like this episode and what happens in it, but I don’t.  I totally understand that some people just don’t want to see any negativity, period, but negativity is not inherently bad or wrong.

Negative opinions, even about something you enjoy, can be valid too - regardless of whether you happen to agree with them or not.

Also I get very salty near the end of this, and that might be entertaining to people who stan this episode?

I am aware that a lot of people – the majority, I’m pretty sure – think that the episode is a masterpiece. And on some level, I see where they’re coming from with that assessment.

The episode is boarded beautifully, the backgrounds – especially during the training montage – are stunning as always.  The music is fantastic, and the performances are great too.  In these respects, Fragments is a stand-out episode; I agree.

(Like look at this.  Gorgeous.)

However, something that’s bothered me since I saw the episode is the writers’ decision to write it into the story that Steven shatters Jasper.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: I just don’t get it.  I’m purposefully misinterpreting the story to say it’s bad.  Steven brings her back to life; and it’s not like he meant to do it in the first place.  I just don’t have the capacity to understand the sublime nature of the show’s storytelling.  I’m an SU crit and all I want to do is make the real fans feel about themselves for liking it.

Uhhhh... no.  Nah.  That ain’t it chief.

It’s true; I am not a writer.  I’m just a passive consumer of media.  However, I do not agree with the viewpoint that in order to properly understand or critique a thing you need to have the expertise and/or experience in order to make something similar.

For example, if I were to put something I drew when I was 10 years old next to something I drew yesterday, it shouldn’t take a person who has had an education in fine art to tell you that the latter drawing is better-looking than the former.

That’s how I approach media consumption and criticism; when I criticise a writing decision, I am doing so as a consumer.  I’m not saying I could write it better, or even that my opinion is objectively correct and the writer is wrong or bad.  I’m just saying that I didn’t like a thing.  Which, I would hope, is allowed?

Okay, defensive hedging over, back to the point; I don’t like that they had Steven shatter Jasper.

[I get markedly saltier from this point on, fyi]

Full admission of bias here: one of the things I really cherish about the original show is how they wrote Steven’s character; he’s a boy with interests that don’t rigidly conform to gender stereotypes.  He likes ‘boyish’ things and ‘girly’ things, and that’s okay; thats just him.  In cartoons when I was growing up, characters like Steven would be the butt of jokes about being ‘girly’ or thinly-veiled homophobia.  I find him very relatable, and I want to acknowledge that yes, that is probably a significant part of why I have such an issue with this episode’s twist.

I am not trying to say that he’s a perfect baby angel or whatever; Steven regularly gets frustrated and angry. He does some pretty manipulative and dickish things to people around him (stop trying to make Larsadie happen, Steven. It’s not going to happen).  He is a flawed character who fucks up sometimes. And he’s not 100% peaceful either; he acts violently when he defends himself against corrupted Gems and Homeworld Gems (and Crystal Gems on occasion *cough*Bismuth*cough*).  

However, he has a pacifistic temperament; whenever it’s possible, he prefers that problems be solved without needless violence or hurt.  And I like that; in most media, it’s rare to have a male protagonist who wants to solve their problems without jumping straight to punching things.

When he accidentally frees Centipeedle, he convinces the Gems to step off and allow him to try and rehabilitate her peacefully; he even notices that the Gems’ weapons are a trigger for her, and make them put them away.  He frees Lapis against the Gems’ wishes because he recognizes that keeping her prisoner is wrong, and when she steals the ocean, he talks it out and heals her so she can leave Earth peacefully.

He tries to aid Jasper when she starts corrupting, fixes Eyeball’s gemstone when she’s cracked and tries talking Bismuth down when she attacks him with the breaking point.  In all of these situations, his words and help are ignored or rejected; he’s forced to resort to violence.  And it traumatises him.  

We get an entire episode dedicated to the fact that he’s been struggling with processing these awful things that happened.

Even in Future, Steven shows hesitation about engaging in unncecessary violence; he gives into Jasper’s goading for a fight after what’s implied to be dozens of failed tries at making her come to Little Homeschool, and he spends an entire episode trying to keep Lapis from squashing the two rogue Lapis Lazulis. 

The only time he hops into a fight willingly is after Eyeball and Aquamarine hold Greg hostage, and even then they pose a clear threat to his and Greg’s safety and have made it clear that they want to hurt him emotionally and physically.  Even at that, he stops and switches tactics to talking them down as soon as they lose their focus and start bickering with each other.

(I mean, he fails.  But it’s the thought that counts.)

I personally find it really jarring that the writers found it appropriate to write it into the series that this same character – over the course of three (3) days – goes from disliking mindless violence for mindless violence’s sake to happily engaging in the destruction of plants and animals* and has done a total 180 on his willingness to spar with Jasper, to the point that he instigates their rematch.

*(You best believe plenty of small mammals and birds – y’know, like the nest Steven saved in the first episode – died as he and Jasper felled tree after tree, not to mention all of those displaced by the destruction of their habitats, and the potential loss of food sources from some of those trees.)

You’re telling me that it’s a reasonable character beat for this boy to gleefully laugh like an anime supervillain at his sudden new-found joy in fighting, then pin Jasper in place, taunt her for helping him get so strong, and hit her so hard that she breaks into pieces and dies?

You’re telling me that that’s an in-character thing for Steven Quartz Diamond Cutie-Pie DeMayo Universe do to another character?

(And yes I am purposefully dancing around talking about the mental health stuff because if I did that I’d have to go on a whole other tangent about Growing Pains and fuck I just don’t feel like it right now lmao)

Going back to Mindful Education, another big thing we see Steven struggle with is the idea that his mother shattered Pink Diamond.  This knowledge sits heavily with him; it makes him sympathetic to the Diamonds, even under the circumstances in which he sees them (escaping from the Human Zoo, and being on trial for said murder). 

He sees their grief, and he feels awful.  He questions who Rose Quartz even was.  He knows, based on what Garnet said, that Rose had to do it; there was no other way to free Earth.  But he still feels awful seeing the pain that Pink’s loss has caused Blue and Yellow Diamond.

In Steven Universe, shattering is clearly equated with execution/death multiple times.  When Pearl and Garnet fret over the crack in Amethyst’s gemstone worsening.  When Blue Diamond threatens to break Ruby.  When Bismuth introduces the breaking point, and Steven recoils at the sight of what it does.  If you want to take the fact that Gem shards are sentient and desperate to become whole again into account, you could even argue that it’s a fate worse than death. This particular act of violence is treated very, very seriously.

When we find out that Rose shattered Pink Diamond, there is a season and a half long arc unpacking the implications and consequences of this one action, and how this knowledge forever alters Steven’s mental image of his mother.  And she didn’t even kill anyone.  It was a lie!

In Steven Universe Future, Steven shatters Jasper 4 episodes before the end of the series.  And it’s only brought up twice; once for a big *gasp* moment during his breakdown in Everything’s Fine, and in I Am My Monster by Pearl, when she has to fill-in Bismuth, Lapis and Peridot.  Notably, it is never discussed around or by Jasper.  Y’know.  The person who actually died.

No indication of how (or even if) what Steven did is affecting his own self-image after his initial breakdown, how Jasper feels about what she went through beyond falling back into the Era 1 and 2 mindset.  No inkling of how the knowledge that Steven killed somebody has affected how anyone in his life thinks or feels about him; when Pearl brings it up in I Am My Monster, she seems to not even really believe it’s true.

If there are any consequences or talks about this incident, they’re skipped over between I Am My Monster and The Future, and we’re expected to assume that Steven and his therapist are dealing with it, I guess?

And yes.  It was an accident.  He did bring her back to life.  But it still happened.  If you hit someone over the head and they stop breathing, just because the paramedics are able to resusitate and stabilize them afterwards doesn’t mean you never hit them.

But here, it’s shoved aside because dwelling on it would take far too much time, and risks framing Steven in an unsympathetic way when he’s meant to be on the cusp of a breakdown.

It just feels like careless writing to me.  They really, really wanted their big action scene with Steven and Jasper, but didn’t think (or maybe weren’t interested in thinking) about the seriousness or consequences of what Steven shattering someone would entail.

In my opinion, Steven shattering Jasper is one of the cheapest, laziest things they could have ever done with his character (and hers, for that matter).  To me, the entire thing feels entirely out of character.  It’s pure shock value; nothing more.

So yeah.  That particular writing decision just does not work for me.  And if you disagree... well that’s fine?  It’s fine.  We can agree to disagree?  I’ve read a lot of defense/praise for this episode, and honestly even after processing all of those opinions and all the time my thoughts about this plotline have been stewing in my brain, I still feel the same way.

#steven universe #steven universe future #negativity #cw death