#because i noticed people who say that havent watched the show past the first season or read the manga and just quote that one polygon artic

[strawberryspeachy]

S4e10 is the first time i want to actually rewatch an entire episode of handmaids tale.... ok wait second time - was it the new “ofglen” who blew up that important building with all the commanders inside and the handmaids outside - that ending was great

But omg

First off elizabeths moss’s acting!!! Ive gotten too used to that same dreadful look shes been making for the past couple seasons that... the wide range of facial expressions really surprised me and it just!! Wow

the suspence the whole episode. Nothing EVER goes right in this show. I knew what i wanted to see but i fully expected fred and serena to go free and happy. That back and forth feeling was super engaging

I loved that even though there was that tension between june and moira before, moira jumped right back to trying to fight and doing all the screaming and ranting for june - someones gotta do it and june was too mentally exausted

K like im still confused why everyone can go in and out of the waterford prison so easily and was like.... dooooo they want june to kill him?!?!? Why are you leaving her alone???

And i was so excited like yesssss shes gonna kill himmm - well first i thought she was gonna go to serena and kill her baby

But when she was walking around that room... like a cat pretending not to notice the mouse in the room - we just know june too well to think she wasnt at least planningggg something

Also fred is fucking DISGUSTINGGGGG as usual. Lying during his ... conference like WHY are you just gonna beleive this psycho at face value?!

Oh and serena thinking shes got all the power back.

Omg the two of them. I cant

And fred really being such a fucking disgusting person to think ANY part of june enjoyed his torture. She is so strong dude - i could never sit there not knowing if my plan will work and playing nice. I thought she was gonna break that glass and stab him

And like. Ok. Lukes not the worst but also - his whole - just get over it!!! Attitude.... even if she cant get him on the wall why are you reprimanding her and trying to pretend she can just get over that trauma with some food. Absolutr lack of empathy.

But june saying hes gonna be on the wall... i was so giddy!!

And i rewatched that smile she made when larence told her she hanst lost her touch- well she could barely contain her smile throughout that entire negotiation. And i loved watching larence put on a show like ‘ah we rlly miss waterford! My brother!!’

Gah and just. Also... i kinda thought june was gonna kill mark when she was outside his building. Men in this show. She went through 7 years of hell and you told her youd help and fucked her over and then throw an entire dramatic tempertantrum when she calmly sits on a bench near your house.... lol wow..i mean uncomfortable but have some prespective

And i wanna say the like demand straight to - oh im sorry. Didnt mean to he a cunt - i meant please? Act june did, its not overacting but knowing june it is so it was funny af

The suspence watching fred get ready to go.., i was literally chanting for the plane to be to gilead but it was so much better! Watchint him get arrested all shocked. “Im a man! I have rights” all the fucking ew... open the door back up and slap him

I just thought he was gonna get sent back and wed watch the commanders all hang him. But it to be lawrence - again with his ‘oh? Is there anything i can do to stop this? No? Ok bye fred!’

And i mean i knew we were in for a treat with nick taking him but i was NOT EXPECTING JUNE to just POP OUT of the trees!!! Fucking perfect. A literal horror movie just for fred

Also why did he keep calling nick son.... like... no one likes you???? Do you really think you can regain power just saying words like this???

And this is e first time i fucking LOVED seeing june in a red coattt and her faceeee like last episode when she turned from calm to screaming - it wad so good and so intense and such good acting and that heartbeat music got me

But hereeeee i cant even desribe the combination or rage and calmness pouring out. Not to be a weeb but thats the first time i think ive ever seen a live action representation of how i imagine anime cool characters to act

That power play of nick and june making out in front of fred loool - i dont care about the ships but that was perfect

“This is sick” - whats sick is how you never run out of things to do and say that make me feel sick...

I loved how june told him to choose - i feel like jt was a call back to his lawyer saying that she CHOSE to be a handmaid. Like theres not good option here

Does anyone think she actually would have shot him dead IF he did choose the gun - part of me wants an alterantive ending where he chose that just so i could watch june either tell him ‘no thats too easy’ or like shoot him in the foot so he cant even run right before being like

Oops i missed and chasing him down anyway

I hate horror movies but watching them all chase him down UGHHH IVE NEVER FELT SO MUCH GLEEE - k not never but ya know

OMG ALMOST FORGOT that sceneee with june and emily talking at the table about how june wants him to be scared to death. And fucking luke - with his judgements turning and looking. I feelll like.... emily helped june decide to do this. Because after getting to the end of the episode it seemed more like they were planning in plain sight in thay scene

I havent rewarched the show. So maybe im remembering incorrectly but it does feel like this fits because - wasnt emily kind of what inspired june to actively start rebelling when she drove the car around and ran one of the guards over

Anddddd the songggg from the 1st? Or 2nd??? Season. The ending right? I just remember that the last time we heard that song was when june first started a quiet resistance against gilead and all the handmaids were together in it. So it brought back those feelings of like ‘FINALLY its happening!!’ And it fit soooo perfectlyyy

When the girls first ran up to fred i thought they were gonna surround him and reinact that “shame” thing they used to be forced to do. I mean i guess they did without actually saying it cause they definitely killed him the way gilead forced the handmaids to kill people in the first season

And it was wonderful to watch! Thank you handmaids tale for making me feel like a psychotic sadist for enjoying that ENTIRE scene. I was giggling like i was watching a disney movie

Gonna ignore that part where june picks up the baby covered in blood - ew

I wanted to seeeeee serena get the finger - more so - i wanted to watch tha family come in and get her and be like - hey guess what your coming back to gilead!!! And see it end with serena as a fucking handmaid - GIVING BIRTH TO THE BABY BETWEEN (i forget the one who visited hers name) LEGS!

But fuck seeing fred on a wall with the “dont let the bastards grind you down” from the the very beginningggg - it felt sooo goodddd

And i just needed to squeal over this episode some more! I watched it hours ago. But i kinda wanna rewatch it rnn

#the handmaid's tale #elizabeth moss

[cupidssrosses]

i. love. ship. playlists.

so, i know for a FACT that im not the only one that uses songs to picture scenarios with a pairing i really love. like, sometimes im so set on the idea of a ship that i have to rewrite the entire show in my brain, rework it so that they end up together logically. songs are always so good to visualise too. harringrove is the BEST for this, because the show itself uses scenes set to 80s music all the time. 

anywho, this is a really longwided way of saying hey heres my harringrove playlist enjoy :)

this song has always been made for a scene where tension has to slowly build.

so, instead of the scene with billy and neil happening at the end of the season when theres much more world-end-y  things to deal with, it happens earlier. 

the  scene happens, billy goes to find max and ends up finding steve and the kids in that junkyard. 

“am i dreaming or is that you harrington”

(really rushed) “yeah its me dont cream your pants what the FUCK are you doing here hargrove you have to leave right now”

billy won’t shut the fuck up so steve has to cover his mouth and try to push him into the bus. then we hear a demidog, steve gives up on billy and gets ready to fight, quietly hands billy a broken pole or something just in case. 

the song starts from 0:00 right when billy sees the demidog, the camera pans in on his face, just so confused and scared, processing what hes seeing. then he joins the fight, he and steve back to back protecting the kids. this leads to billy being part of the gang, at least in some respects. hes strong as fuck and now they have to fill him in on the circumstances now so hes around more often to help. he wants to protect max, but also be near/protect steve. 

so ! during subsequent fights/situations, billy and steve get a little closer, damn they’re not in love but hey they’re getting more comfortable and theres deeeefinitely some mutal attraction, the energy from those shower and basketball scenes hasn’t gone away. if steves the mother figure billys the dad. 

on the “i need a hero” (BAM) part that leads into the chorus, billy saves steve with some kind of big action you know? RIGHT on the beat i swear i get chills every time i picture it to this song. like he pushes something off of him or pull him out of the way really suddenly after running reaaaallly fast to get to him. right after it cuts to steve looking all suprised and impressed while billy keeps fighting. 

same applies to the part that goes “watched out here i COME” in the second song, except its steve saving billy. 

since two thousand and fucking 17 ive seen this song as billys image of steve. it always sounded like his thoughts about him. 

this is one of the first moments billy realises he might really REALLY like steve. hes not just horny he might actually love this moron. at around 2:07 when all the instrumental goes away and its mainly the drums, thats when it happens. 

hes picking steve up from somewhere. theyve been spending more time together as buddies. he apologised for being a dick, theyve had some more serious conversations. hes taking him to hang out with the kids, maybe he just needed a ride home from school or work. anyway, its golden hour. hes waiting to see him and hes weirdly nervous, more than he ever was waiting to pick up a date with one of the hawkins girls.

and then he sees steve walk out onto the street, or come around the corner.

his heart STOPS. steve just looks so beautiful. the light hitting his hair. he smiles at someone he knows as the walk by. billys just HIT with hoe much he loves this stupid moron and his stupid fucking smile.

steves looking around for the car and looks so. happy. when he sees billy, billy smiles back. its been a while since hes smiled that genuinely. 

billy really really part of gang now. this might be sometime after the final events of season 2 i think?? billys saved them all, had a lot of experiences, hes built up some trust with the group and it feels normal that hes there. hes part of the family, and thats what this songs about. 

it night time, theyre at steves house, all the kids, nancy, jonathen, etc. some are swimming, everyones dancing, things feel a little more okay. 

at around 1:54, (again im a sucker for stripping away most of the instrumental and relying on a few key sounds, including loud drums) billy looks around. he has for one of the first times in a while this sense of FAMILY and ACCEPTANCE and SAFETY.

theres all these shots of everyone having fun, like 2 or 3 cuts, then to steve. just standing there laughing, hairs all wet from the pool, towel around his shoulders. he looks over, catches billys eye, gives him a smile, it feels like he knows what hes thinking, and he feels the same way. 

same night, during the part build up that starts at around 2:53, everyones trying to get billy to dance, hes been smoking on one of the pool chairs, not antisocial just not dancing. not his thing. plus he doesnt want to look like an idiot infront of steve. anyway. 

one of the kids starts it, starts gesturing for him to get up, pointedly singing the lyrics, the rest join in unti theyre all singing and chanting for him to join, all while the song builds and builds. finally steve joins in. maintains eye contact. thats enough for billy. he just keeps his eyes on steve as he stands up. its more like theyre dancing together, less like the kids are there. right at the end of that bridge he just lets go. takes of his jacket and dances around with everyone. he doesnt look stupid either. he looks good. and steve notices 

this is a small one, i dont even have a story to it. all i know is that comparisons between the scene that accompanies this song in top gun and the basket ball scene in st2 have been made, and itd be a super fun, corny scene :)

starts at the very begining. this song has ALWAYS felt so magical and me. i get chills every god damn time i hear the intro. i want their first kiss to be to the intro. 

its after the last fight of season three. someone else was flayed, someone we dont love. obviously billy survives. in FACT, he was along for the ride with robin and steve, all the shenanigens with the russians, billy was tied up and drugged too. BOTH he and robin admit their sexualities. 

billy still sacrafices himself to save the kids from the monster, he says something cute like “see ya round pretty boy” or some corny shit like that before he goes to run and save el, theres a moment when steve knows what hes about to do, theyre staring at eachother and theeeerse the electricity steve knows so much about. theyre really about to kiss, staring at eachothers mouths, but the monster makes a noise and billy knows its now or never, so he runs off. 

steve tries to save him but gets nocked out. he goes unconcious thinking billys going to or is already dead. 

it cuts to the end scene when theyre all in the car park. steves got an icepack to his face, hes obviously been sobbing. 

but he heres a voice. 

(clearly overjoyed and kind of smug) “am i dreaming or is that you harrington”

he looks up. its billy. we get a nice long run-jump-hug. steves in billys arms before he can even finish his sentence:

(nearly crying but SO excited) “yeah its me dont cream your pa-”

NOW. OKAY SO. i love love love they idea of billy steve and robin going home with murray, or at least showing up at his place. maybe billy cant stand the thought of going home, hell maybe neil was the one that got flayed and died idk. anyway.

nancy and jonathen are like, we know a place if people dont want to go home, and they go murrays place. when they show up at the door murray KNOWS. hes like “ffs two more people who have repressed feelings for eachother what am i a therapist. but he lets them in and they have a similar conversation that murray had with nancy and jonathen/joyce and hopper. poking fun at how much they like eachother etc. 

billy and steve have a really intimate talk. not sexaul intimate, just really open. theyre both so tiered, steve thought billy was dead, billy had to say goodbye to steve, who he KNOWS hes in love with by now, thinking he was about to die. they both KNOW how the feel about eachother now, but they havent said it explicitly. just lots of “i really thought id lost you”, “your my best friend”, “i cant believe youd do that for me” etc etc. 

they decide to go to bed, billy walks steve to his room, the one nancy stayed in when she and jonathen got together, theyre standing at the door. just staring at eachother like they were during that fight sequence. the energies back. billy really thinks he might go for it, but decides he doesnt want to ruin things if steve doesnt really feel the same way. he doesnt even know if he likes guys yet. so he just says “night steve” (steve, get it, not harrington, cause theyre close now and he loves him and those defensive barriers are down ahhhh). 

just as he turns to leave, steve does this:

this exact thing. he grabs billys arm, leans down and kisses him. he thought he lost his chance once, he nearly died like a million times in the past 48 hours. he cant stop himself. 

RIGHT HERE is when the intro to jump kicks in. FUck that synth, the rumbling note that runs through the whole thing. time. stops. its perfect. billys wanted this for so long, so has steve but in the grand tradition of fanfiction he didnt know it until he nearly lost billy for good. 

their arms are all over eachother, just as the rest of the instruments come in, at like 0:15, they both smile into the kiss and shut the door behind them, and it cuts away :). 

theyre finally together!!! theyre in the happy, honeymoon stage of realtionship. god theyre just fucking every. chance. they. get. i think this is a new season. it’s a montage of them hooking up all over hawkins. 

in the back of the video store, robin covering for them. in the car, outside school, steves house. someone walks in and billy has to hang out of the window. he makes a noise and steves like “thats probably just a bird or something” and billy MAKES A BIRD NOISE TO THE BEST OF HIS ABILITY. 

when steve helps him back inside he just stares a him with that “youre a moron but your my moron now” face. “~mimics the sound billy made~ really?” and then billy just laughs and goes back to hooking up with him. 

theyre just HAPPY. theyre comfortble, theyre stupid idiots whod die for eachother and horny as fuck allllll the time, like young guys are. i just want a really lighthearted, NOT INNOCENT, but lighthearted tone to a whole montage of them just being happy and stupid together. 

aaaaand we’re bassically at the end of the storyline i have for them based on music. these three i just like the thought of. i want steve do dance super shamelessly in his bedroom in a towel, not in a sexy way dont get me wrong he looks DUmb, and billys at his door window just admiring this stupid idiot dancing around. i cant believe im in love with this man this graceless lanky man i had to choose this one. but ill be damned if i wouldnt give my fucken life for him

and finally trust me go listen to any scorpions song its bassicaly a harrington anthem. it all started with rock you like a hurricain for me, i saw steve look at him, i saw billy and listened to the lyrics and just thought theres no god damned way this man is straight whats the bet hes into steve and then BAM same season hes just so obviously flirting with him constantly i-

anyway okay so

this song, like many other scorpion songs is allll about billy and steve in my opion. go have fun. 

PlayerEntity made this gif not me all credit to them i just wanted to include it cause its my favorite edit of them ever. 

and thats all!!! if youre seeing this and you thought it was cool thanks i had fun. i really just wanted to get this shit out of my brain its been up there since i was a fuckn 14 year old, now im 18 lol. 

i love these men more than myself and sometimes i forget that theyre not acutally together in show cause i live so completely through fanfiction and the sequence of events you just read. 

fuck why am i signing out like you just watched a youtube video or something i should just post this okay by now xxxxx

#harringrove #billy x steve #billy hargrove #steve harrington

[ohoshi]

omg first i need to talk about nct at song festival (gayo daechukjae) umm first of all mark and taeyongs rap was so good but ofc we all knew they would kill it. and then in nct U class, teacher taeyong looked so good...the way he bit that pointer stick thing in the beginning was so sexc (and the hair and the glasses ahdsfasjf) 😳 but also sungchans rap in that?? i was not expecting that but why am i even surprised anymore.. and also misfit live?? i loved nct's school uniform concept too for some reason ahahaha

and then xiaojun in resonance!! wow yes go shine xj!!! (also idk why but i found it so funny when it was doyoung's turn after xj, but xj was kinda blocking dy (who was really walking with a PURPOSE) so dy lightly pushed him out of the way) and then omg shotaro!! offstage he is so 😊 but damn in hard carry he was so good!! ahh and then also the thing where all the kpop artists at gayo daechukjae sang that song was so cute (i smiled so hard when nct came up 🥺)

yea for my job situation i think it will be okay, i talked to some people i know/mentors about it too and i think things will work out...they always do in the end right? 😊 now about anime LOL this is making me wanna start/rewatch an anime now hahahah! honestly i kind of have phases where i alternate between kdramas and animes, but i havent rly watched anime much lately besides haikyuu (which i was also surprised was still airing (but it's only season 2 so far?)). kpop (aka NCT) has been consuming my life lmao but im here for it 😂

weightlifting fairy was also my first kdrama!! yes i can totally give u some kdrama recs! besides the ones i mentioned before (which are most of my top ones), i also liked chicago typewriter, marriage not dating (i love the fake relationship trope hahaha), dinner mate, sky castle (it's kinda intense but it's so good and an iconic kdrama), cheer up, another miss oh, kingdom (if you like zombie things)...i heard startup is good and i want to watch it soon too! also i continued watching more of uncanny counter these past few days and i love it (but it's ongoing so no binging)

okay now svt: i watched some of your recs and youre so right all their choreos are so satisfying?! i also actually agree with you about black on black, i liked black on black and it was cool but it only featured like 5 members lmao and in the svt choreos it does feel like all of them are featured in some way in each performance? plus their choreos are just so great to watch!! also i've had left and right stuck in my head since i watched it LOL but i agree it's objectively better than dynamite (not an army though; also pls nobody come at us for this lmaoo)

also super random but can you tell me who is the one in the red/purple plaid shirt in the svt home dance practice?? i am kinda attracted by his dance moves LOL and i havent learned names yet 😭 i will continue watching all ur svt recs though hehehe and update you on the status of my fangirling :))

omg wait also i would never have guessed that you're not an english speaker just from these messages!! how did you know that i was prob a native speaker haha (i guess *technically* cantonese is my first language, but then i learned english in school so now i'm obviously more native in that lol and english is the only language i can read/write in)

OMGGF IKR as a multi stan i really enjoyed the rap collab especially because i really love monsta x's rap line (esp i.m!!! his rapping skill 😍) and of course mark and taeyong!!!! 😭 our boys 😭 our golden rappers 😭 SLAYED IT! omg the nct u got me 😳 taeyong looked so good???? wtf? and also sungchan? damn that boy keeps surprising me! the interesting part to me was when one member(johnny if i remember correctly) bumped into taeyong but it was done on purpose and how he uhhh kinda shook his body and his head but it all looked so cool and he never stopped rapping!!! love how they all 'performed' misfit manifesting wild teenagers in school (as they are tbh) IT WAS SO FUN AND COOL!!!

XIAOJUN!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAS SO!!!!!! GOOD!!!!!!! THE CONFIDENCE??? THE STAGE PRESENCE????? XIAOJUN CENTER???? XIAOJUN BEING RELEVANT????? i live 😭 he was so good he looked so good i was so happy and i'm so proud of him 😭 from here the only way to go is up! i hope he keeps surprising us! and omg i haven't noticed that part when doyoung pushed him bc he blocked him?? and i just rewatched it and it looks funny 🤣 but they held everything professionally 😌  no surprises there 😌

OH MY GOD THE HARD CARRY PERFORMANCE!!!!!!!!! first of all our boy shotaro DAMN 😳 he looked so good you couldn’t say that he just debuted a few months ago!! such a dancing machine! (but honestly i am not surprised because in make a wish he was rly good and he debuted as a dancer i expected from him to be good™ as he is!) and i love the duality od him <3 yk that kind of idol that you want to protect at all cost but the next second they're the one you seek protection from? yeH sign me uP! and don't even get me started on hyunjin, juyeon and moonbin!!!!! but i mean all 3 of them are main dancers of course they would look good™ 😌 (yeah shotaro performed with 3 main dancers of 3 different groups i mean the honor??????)

the end of the festival was so wholesome! It was a serotonin boost and me too i also smiled the whole time! so cute 😭 and ot23 were cutiesssss

yes! everything will work out in the end! don't stress about it!<3 oh haikyuu only has 2 seasons? wtf hsgsjsgs ok then i just watched when it had like 13 episodes, WHEN IT FIRST CAME OUT that's when i watched it lmao

OMG OK I HAVE WRITTEN DOWN ALL OF THESE DRAMAS (and from the previous ask) IN MY NOTES SO FAR im mostly excited about the fake relationship one 👀 i love fake relationship trope, too 🤧 oh no binging?? is that your thing?? usually i love to wait for the show to finish airing and then i binge watch it in a few days (or one day depends how busy i am)

SEVENTEEN!!!!: yeah all of their choreos are so satisfying (pointing this out one more time) they always pay attention to details (for example in home, bc you're familiar with it, they even choreograph the hands and pay attention to them while most of the other kpop choreos very often freestyle the whole arms sjagaj) here's a fun fact abt svt that makes me love them so much agsgsj: they're self produced! they produce their own music and they even come up with their own choreos!! (of course not on their own, woozi is a producer but he's not making songs on his own he coproduces them with [a producer name bc i guess that's irrelevant but if you’re curious: bumzu], they come up with their own choreo (to be precise, hoshi does! he is 1/2 main dancers in group and he is the main choreographer! he doesn't do everything on his own of course, he gets help from the rest of the performance team (which is a svt subunit consisted of their 2 main and 2 lead dancers: hoshi, dino, the8, jun) and of course some other infamous kpop choreography teams) and i think that, by now, all the members were credited at least once for the lyrics

I'M SO GLAD YOU HAVE LEFT AND RIGHT STUCK IN YOUR HEAD HAGSJSSGSG but i mean of course you would it's soo good and soo catchy (yeahhh no worries, this army has already gotten minor hate for having controversial opinions™ and for criticising her faves so idc anymore 💁🏻‍♀️ it's my opinion as a dancer and i stand by it, even can't you see me by txt is better than dynamite so literally 3 dance performance were better!!!! in a way!!!! and neither of the 3 won!!! yes i am salty!!!!!)

the guy in the red/purple shirt (the center guy when they do the 3 dances for the first time right??) IS DINO!!!! he's the maknae and 2/2 main dancers in svt so!!! of course you would be attracted by his moves!!!!!! JSGSJSN i'm curious to see if you end up staning svt and biasing dino hsfsjsgsha

CANTONESE IS YOUR FIRST LANGUAGE? damn i thought you couldn’t get more interesting here's a dumb question: can you understand xiaojun, hendery and lucas without titles??? not that i would know if they ever speak cantonese in front of the camera for i don't know the difference between chinese dialects</3

#thank u for saying you wouldve never guessed that english wasnt my first language #that makes me happy!! #also your english is so good that's how i knew you were a native speaker lmao #ss20

[thoughtfulpaperback]

SPOILERS!!!

Charmed 02x02 Review

Y'all part of me just can't. Like the excitement and energy over this last episode is too much to keep inside. I am super ready to burst and super excited for episode 3. But I am just gonna say that overall I thought this episode was superb 8/10 only because I am saving my 9 and 10. But if I could I'd give it a 9 out of ten. There was only like a couple things I was nitpicky about and it's pretty standard tv logic stuff that most people overlook so dont come at me for it. So I am just gonna start like I always do except I cant just pick 3 likes and dislikes so I am just gonna list my likes some of the nitpicks and then some episode highlights.

SPOILERS AHEAD

Things I liked:

1. Hacy development

So no secret I am a hacy fan and I pretty much love any hacy content the show will give us but I really thought the show did so well this episode.

Originally, I thought the show was going to explore Macy's feelings through Dark!Harry, and in a way they have revealed them using Dark!Harry (Season 1 ended with us not sure if Macy felt anything for Harry, but knowing he had some feelings for her). I was worried there may be less hacy moments because they would keep most of the interaction between Dark!Harry and Macy. Even had me scared that Macy may be falling for Dark!Harry and not Harry proper. But no, they gave us Genuine Hacy.

The awkwardness of the interactions after the dream. That car ride was hilarious with the map and the radio (harry is still super at comedic relief in club and in car)

Harry's concern over having done something wrong

The looks when checking each other out.

Making each other laugh and encouraging each other.

Harry trying to save that witch and Macy being concerned by what it would

"I know Harry"

I mean it wasn't just tension. There was some fluff thrown in. Harry telling her to celebrate the victories and looking at her proudly. Which brings me to item 2.

2) I love what rupert does with his eyes between the two Harrys. Real harry (as macy put it) is so harmless looking. Those puppy eyes are adorable and rupert makes sure to have then turned up all the way when being real harry.

The only time Dark!harry makes soft eyes (well sort of) is the first time we see him with Macy, the initial moment in episode 1, and then when Maggie goes for a hug in this episode. He is just so taken off guard by the affection that his pretending-to-be-Harry-face slips and his eyes kind of go wide and they arent so narrowed and focused. Which makes me think he has not been hugged often or at all . . . That's sad. Then the switch when Maggie backs away. The eyes narrow again and he gets all mean. Just love that rupert can do things like that to give both characters distinctive enough feels that you can tell that dark!harry is acting.

3) Mel and Maggie bonding

So I really do hope that we get some Macy and Mel bonding, but I am happy anytime the show can deepen the bonds between the sisters. Maggie and Mel have a bit of a complicated relationship even though they grew up together. I mean especially from this episode we see and remember that Mel was the big sister for most of her life. She protected Maggie and seems to have acted like a second parent. It is sad that there dad really just turned out to be a bad dad. No reason behind it no, issues with Marisol other than apparently the ones he created on his own (which I will get into on my nitpicks). The fact this was just a loss for Maggie, and not just a loss as in she was the only one to feel something when Ray died but a loss of memories she thought she had and an idea of who her dad (a piece of her past), was sad but it actually gave us further insight into mel and Maggie's dynamics. First season we knew the rift between mel and Maggie was over Mel's obsession with and Mel's expectations of how Maggie should have acted and behaved. I think a lot of us chalked it up to Mel being controlling and having the oldest child attitude, but I think now we see there is more there. Mel seems to have spent a lot of time protecting Maggie and biting her tongue about certain aspects of thier lives and in a sense making sacrifices for her. So it makes sense she would expect the same from Maggie, but at the same time Maggie didnt know, and even if she did thise were Mel's choices and Maggie doesnt owe her anything for them.

Knowing that we can see how it is so easy for riffs to form between them which make the start of this season make more sense to me. Because Maggie wants to live her life and is a trusting and positive person. Mel expects a certain level of loyalty and commitment and has a different idea of what that looks like compared to Maggie. On top of there general personality differences it makes sense they all that would culminate into a rocky relationship prone to communication difficulties and tifs. But I love that they are starting to acknowledge those things and rebuild. Last season it was them just getting over feeling abandoned by each other after the death of Marisol. This exposed deeper roots of the initial rift. I liked that.

4) I love that the Maggie and Mel still have Magic and even though though the active powers are gone they arent defenseless. They just need to be resourceful. I actually like this a lot and I feel gives the writers a lot of room to play with creative ways for the ladies to save other witches.

5) demon lore!!!! Okay so while season 1 seems mostly thrown out the lore actually explains season 1 demons better.

One of the issues I had was that there did not seem to be a synchronized front with the demons and they never explained why even though Alistair claimed to be a hotshot the only people he had working for him was his family.

In the OG in first season before lore got expanded) demons and witches werent organized. Demons sort of acted on thier own for thier own purposes and witches seem mostly solitary except for occasional get togethers on important events. Later on in the series demons got an organization system (triad) then later one ruler (the source of all evil). Witches seem mostly solitary except for now the elders who assigned white lighters watched over them and placed rules on magic. I dont think people really remember the drastic shift in lore and the plot holes OG had because we generally liked the places it was going. So I am kinda on that page fro the reboot.

It flipped the script. Witches are or were the organized bunch both self ruling and ruling over the magical community. Demons were at war with each other and all had different agendas so makes sense that the Caines were mostly on thier own.

I like this idea of there being different general types of demons and a hierarchy. I do wonder if that will limit then in the long run, but assuming they can be creative with the categories they have defined I am not too worried. I am excited to get more info on demons now.

6) the new love interests. I love Mel's new love interest. So different from Mel and her previous love interests. I reserve judgment until we get more interaction but I am liking her so far. Jordan is interesting I am actually liking the build up of thier relationship and will be nice to see maggie start off slow and make friends with him first. I wasnt a huge parkerita fan but I did not dislike the ship. But one of my general blehs is love at first site between teens. The way parker and Maggie began was just off putting to me but they were nice together when they were together honestly. This will be a good venture into perhaps an adult relationship or at least on that doesnt begin with as much drama. That said she is dead and will have to hide her identity from him soo....

Now on to the nitpicks:

1) Ray's characterization.

Okay so I dont mind that Ray turned out to be just a crap dad. It happens. But there are things we know that Ray probably didnt that makes us wonder why marisol even got with him and married him.

A) we know Marisol continued an affair throughout her marriage to Ray. Even assuming Ray was just a crap husband and father, why did marisol get with him and marry him if he was so good at alienating everyone he met. I wouldnt think he was just a one night stand that Marisol decided she would have to marry after getting pregnant. I would think she would be above that.

B) did he even know about magic. Was his whole relationship and life with Marisol and the girls just based on secrets, ignorance, and not being around?

I mean for B it is fine if it was I just would like to know for sure what it was versus just guessing. But I assume like Maggie I am just gonna have to move on from this

2) the house lights and the job application.

Okay how does the house have power and and water without the city noticing? How can maggie apply for a job with no social security number? I mean I assume because she is dead she cant use her real info. Or she could but wouldnt that make it easy for demons who may think to infiltrate government records to find them? I mean this is a nitpick and can be explained away by Magic, but still it was on my mind.

3) the mysterious figure at the end. Okay y'all, I assume it is Dark!Harry. But the more I thought about it, the more I got angry that they didnt show his face. Basically, that is leaving room that it could be someone else like one of the other new love interests or someone we havent met yet. I dont like that. If it is Dark!Harry we've already met him and know he is after the girls so most likely would be working with the demons. So showing him wouldnt be a big deal. But keeping the figure hidden means leaving that door of possibilites open. This has me paranoid now. Again nitpick. I'll get over it. Some people might like that.

Episode Highlights:

Comic relief Harry. Getting knocked down when orbing into the club and not being able to hold a map.

"I'll put a hex on you."

"I'm formidable!" You tell him!

Harry's wonky orbing in general. so confused so turned about.

Maggie being able to tell that Dark!Harry was not Harry. "Those are Harry's charges and family you cant fool them ya creep!!!"

Invisible mel putting a shovel to the side of Dark!Harry's face. "Yess!!!!"

Harry's puppy dog eyes when Macy says all she needs is a look to know who the real Harry is

#cw charmed #charmed remake #charmed reboot #charmed cw #charmed 2018 #charmed spoilers #charmed 2018 spoilers #hacy #mel vera #maggie vera #macy x harry #harry x macy #harry greenwood #macy vaughn

[inacatastrophicmind]

(1) So like... I had no idea people had such strong feelings towards Supernatual (specifically later seasons) until now. I've been watching this show on and off for years now and I just recently started getting into it and in the last month I decided to check out the fandom (unfortunately I missed the massive wave of the earlier fandom) Specifically the Destiel fandom cause I suddenly latched on to it when I picked up watching the show in season 8 (I still have no idea how that happened)

(2) But it's kinda taken over my life and that's how I'm here now (btw, fucking LOVE your blog) I am sad to see that the fandom isnt at its former glory, but that is to be expected with such a long running show. ANYWAYS IM RAMBLING! What I was saying is, I've enjoyed this show from the start and even until now, I havent noticed much of a "decline" and I've never really stopped enjoying this show so I dont see why people are so hateful towards it, but, each to their own I guess.

(3) I'm sad that I just started really appreciating the show just as its dying out and ending, I wish I had been there sooner but you go back in time unfortunately. So I'm just here playing 14 years of catch up haha. I thoroughly enjoy your blog and the content you provide so thank you for that, and sorry for the massive ass ask LMAO

First of all, thank you, I’m glad you like my blog and my stuff :’)

I got into SPN and its fandom just when season 7 had just finished. I remember that from season 8 to season 10 there was so much content, there were so many people creating stuff and reblogging stuff. I even met people in my own city that watched SPN, which was amazing.

But then, the writers killed Charlie and people couldn’t take it anymore. Some people kept watching SPN during season 11, but that season was so bad that most  people didn’t care anymore about the show and started leaving the fandom. And since then, the fandom has been slowly dying. People stopped watching the show because the writing got worse, some of their favorite characters got killed for stupid reasons and/or because Destiel hasn’t become canon yet. Those are the main reasons. People got tired and frustrated, so I get why they decided to move on.

The rest of us, even if we’re frustrated with all that stuff, we still watch the show, because we like the main characters and we still love to see them. But at this point, most of us are frustrated with the writers and the direction they’ve decided to take the story. We’re mainly watching because of the characters and the cast. Because we still love them so much.

It’s sad to see that so many people has left the fandom, because I miss so many amazing and talented people. Thankfully, there are still a bunch of amazing and talented people, but there are times when this fandom feels like is dead, and I miss its past days, when you could find so much things about SPN, when every day you have tons of new content. Nowadays, it’s so hard to find new content. It also has to do with the fact that Tumblr is making bad choices that affect creators and the fact that people hit like instead of reblog, which it isn’t encouraging at all.

Still, some of us are here, and most of us have a complicated relationship with the show thanks to the poor job of the writers. But we still love the characters and the cast. Some of us still create stuff because we love making what we do, like gifs, fanart, fanfics, graphics... And there are still people who even if they don’t create anything, they reblog our stuff and spread it, and that’s amazing.

The fandom might be still dying, but the few of us that still remain despite of everything, are as active as we can. And that’s something.

#Anonymous #my answers

[thegoldenavenger]

i know someone has to have done this meta before but! spinel in the steven universe movie and duets!

spoilers for the su movie! (and a sentence spoiler for the su season 6 maybe)

first, she interrupts the crystal gems dueting, ending their song and not even attempting to harmonize with them. 

then, in who we are spinel tries to bring back steven’s (her best friend’s!) theme of “here we are in the future and everything is wrong” but she missed her cue.  steven is done with his pity party and has joined with bismuth, lapis and peridot.  spinel wants steven to be happy and have fun but she can’t quite understand how to do that.  she wants to join in with the singing but she missed the part where steven crosses over from point a (sad) to point b (ready to plan) and because she doesn’t have the development yet to understand growth and change.  

it’s noticeable that through the rest of the duets between steven and the crystal gems he’s trying to reform she doesn’t try to sing again. perhaps she took steven’s “we’re done singing now” as an order.  she is always trying to participate though, of course she is, as steven’s best friend. who doesn’t try and involve themselves in their friends’ lives? but she doesn’t know how to start a friendship, only how to be in one.  

that isn’t her fault obviously, since she has never had time to develop those skills.  a flash of her post!pink state comes back when steven tries to leave without her, an obvious trigger.  when steven and amethyst sing “no matter what” spinel patiently waits in the background of most shots, trying to get steven’s attention or having fun watching his accomplishments, but she does have a quick frown when steven reaches out to spin amethyst.   and it’s very noticeable that spinel isn’t in or is late to shots where steven and amethyst touch.  

still, as steven’s friend she shows a willingness to be amiable to steven’s other friends.  because you try and be nice to your friends’ other friends.  but she never tries to duet with any of them. even in who we are she tries to sing steven’s part. so she can sing with steven. she’s not interested in singing with the crystal gems, even if that’s the chorus he needs to hear, and even if that’s the only way to sing with him.

(spinel is very supportive of what steven wants to do! “you wanna climb it?” “you can do it steven!” even though she’d be enabling him, or putting him into a dangerous situation) 

it’s when independent together happens with pearl and fusions that really sets spinel off though.  seeing garnet fuse doesn’t bother her because sapphire and ruby aren’t steven.  she even likes garnet, the only gem she initiates touch with.  garnet is just as new and purposeless as her. a blank slate if you will.  

the greg & steven fusion hits spinel so hard for the same reason it hits pearl so hard! steven is no longer there to be her best friend.  garnet gets into the show because she’s learning how to be independent together but spinel does not know how to do that.  garnet flies off with lion, leaving spinel behind, again bringing up her original trauma.  there’s no room for her in the duet and she doesn’t even try. 

both steven and spinel’s arcs are about change. 

finally steven reaches out to spinel for spinel’s second song of the movie drift away which is almost a duet with pink--but spinel has to sing it alone.  there is no pink to duet with now.  spinel’s reversed-sounding theme perfectly encapsulates spinel’s inability to look forward, her stagnation and focus on the past. 

she finally gets a chance to duet with steven.  found is when steven and spinel finally sing together.  but they’re still very much not on the same page.  with notes of other friends in the undertones and spinel very much ignoring steven’s message with the song (namely that on earth spinel will have a chance to find someone else to heal with) to double down on best-friending steven. spinel still sings after the duet is over. 

and she very quickly bends over backwards to fit a betrayal into her mindset. she was there when steven found out he couldn’t store the rejuvinater in lion’s mane. but that’s not relevant to her regression, so she makes up a story that validates her anger. 

incidentally, it’s sweet that she sets up the puzzle pieces for steven to help garnet remember truth, since garnet is the only gem spinel sort of liked. though she quickly throws that away, since garnet was never spinel’s real friend anyways. 

spinel once again does not try to duet with garnet, even though garnet is directly addressing her with the lyrics in true kind of love.  “stuck in the middle of fear and shame / everybody’s looking for someone to blame / like it’s a game” 

that’s a direct call back to spinel’s “i’m the looser of the game you didn’t know you were playing!” and also the building blocks of spinel’s and steven’s battle with the “i dont want to play” “it’s not a game” “i came here to take my anger out on a bunch of strangers” it’s a perfect opening for spinel to duet with, even if it’s more antagonist singing but she will not.  

“and now i am better than win-or-loose / there’s a new direction that i’d like to choose” is direct set up for steven’s and spinel’s main conflict. that is: needing to change. 

i havent touched on it yet, but the beginning of the movie is complete antithesis to the themes of steven universe: changing. everything changes, what makes earth amazing is that everyone grows and changes.  steven opens the movie up by saying he wished everything would stay the same.  spinel grants him that wish. 

in change steven is also explicitly opening his song up for spinel to join in! but she can’t make a change.  she says it herself “when i change i change for the worse!” she is terrified of change, she has no faith in herself.  after venting her anger, spinel finally sees that she doesn’t know how to really be friends with someone.  

no body ever said spinel was pink’s friend.  just her playmate.  steven was the only person she had a chance to be friends with.  and she kind of messed that up.  

now she realizes she needs focus on herself before trying to insert herself into steven’s life.  

in come the diamonds! obviously the movie ends with bookends! the diamonds singing let us adore you to steven.  they’re all harmonizing together, showing that theyre actually working together now and communication.  very different from the forced synchronization white diamonds made happen with her brilliance.  

now when they sing let us adore you (reprise) spinel gets her duet. her parts of found fit in perfectly with the new let us adore you and she effortlessly switches parts, as do the diamond trio. i know a lot of people had (valid) issues with the diamonds just picking up spinel but in context of the musical cues in the movie it really works 

finale is of course the final bookend to the movie, steven’s leitmotif and here we are in the future shining very clearly.  in a huge bombastic final musical number, again it’s very obvious that spinel isn’t included.  neither are the diamonds, for that matter. because none of them know how to actually get a long with steven!

(that makes it very cool that she’s in the su6 intro, because it implies she and the diamonds have grown and changed and are now able to get a little closer to steven!!

#long post #meta #steven universe #spinel #this is 1200 words for some reason

[aspiestvmusings]

TMS S3: GROUP A

THE MASKED SINGER SEASON 3  GROUP A/ GROUP 1: (contestants 1 - 6)

EP 3x01: CLUES & MORE: RECAP for remaining 5: 

SPOILERS BELOW!!!

KANGAROO

CLUES: 

Location: Outdoors: “Australia” 

Location: Next to a /in a yard of a “peach coloured” building with arch/vault-style architecture 

VISUAL CLUES:

Sign: OUTBACK (with the U being in the shape of horseshoe)

Sign: Yellow “road sign” with an arrow pointing down (”spiraling down”) 

MIB as papparazzi/press following her - taking pics, media attention (for “the wrong reasons”) 

Gramophone on a tree branch 

Boxing bag -  the kangaroo boxing/hitting the boxing bag 

Jump rope - the kangaroo jumping over a jump rope (made of a vine...held by MIB)

AUDIO CLUES/VOICE OVER:

”Like most of you watching, I’m a survivor.” 

“I recently lost a person, who held my familys heart together. Then, by my own admission, I found myself in the spotlight for all the wrong reasons.” 

“But I’m here to do what kangaroos do best - bounce back.”

“I have to fight for my family. And show them that bullies never win.”

“I am beyond terrified - I’ve never done anything like this before. But I’m not about to lose the chance to realize the dream I’ve always had.” 

“To all the survivors out there -- This one’s for you.” 

 ON STAGE CLUES:

Song choice: “Dancing on My Own” by Robyn 

Look/Costume: The kangaroo has a pouch (indicates female), but also has a red/silver boxing outfit & gloves (indicates male). Outfit colours: red & silver. Important: there is a crown on the back of her robe. 

Stage: hexagon-shaped mirrors (5 of  them) surrounding her/behind her [if my other guess is correct, then that stage design is a “clue”] 

Height: Tall-ish...almost the same height as host Nick. A bit shorter, around 175cm, probably.

Mic hand: Right 

Talking:  “One of my greatest fears is being vulnerable. And this year I’ve had no other option than to be vulnerable. But...with this kangaroo costume I feel like I can get my superpowers back.” +  [breathes in/sighs heavily before the song starts]

GUESSES: 

I HAVE NO NAMES OF MY OWN. -- I thought she was this certain female artist, because the voice kinda seemed familair (sounded like hers to me), but none of the clues and other things seemed to fit. And after checking the clues it seems to confirm it cannot be her, cause nothing matches. Also... to me she doesn’t sound like any of the singers I thoughts she could be based on the clues, so... I havent actually figured her out...

I think people online are correct, and it’s a certain “reality star” (gramophone = reference to her dad being a sound engineer on a well-known past TV show) Though I am considering a few more options - mostly other reality stars/youtubers/family members of celebs... particularily one name. If my guess here is correct, then just like Llama, she would have a connection to a previous TMS contestant...but since I am not that familiar with her singing voice, I cannot be sure. But she has lost family members in the past few years, she has been in a media scandal, and you can even explain the australia thing kinda... so...until I hear more of her, I’ve got one name mainly in mind. But I wont name it until I’ve heard her sing at least once more.

POSSIBLE MEANING OF CLUES.

Survivor = the title of a “Destiny’s Child” hit song

Lost a family member recently = either her family member (parent, grandparent?) died or they parted ways (were cut ouf of each others lives)

Gramophone = possibly a reference to a Grammy nomination/win. Or just music/sound/audio

Outback = possible connection to Australia

“spiraling down” road sign + papparazzi following her = she’s been in a media scandal “recently”

Crown = King/Queen 

LLAMA

CLUES: 

Location: Radio station/Mixing studio - mixing console (close up) 

Location: Pottery making “class” 

VISUAL CLUES:

Mixing console - close up of a studio/radio station mixing console 

23.3 The Wool (name of the radio station/show) 

Red lightbulb in the studio 

Photo of a bull (the animal)

Playing cards: Ace of Spaces & Jack of Spades). Two black suit cards showing (Jack Black)

Sounds of Seattle - title of a vinyl album 

Romancing a llama: pottery 

AUDIO CLUES/VOICE OVER:

"Mi-Mi-Mi-Mi-Mix it up!”

“Good morning, Nerd herd! You’re listening to The Wool. Where we’re all cool. No Bull.” 

“I’m here for one reason only - to have a laugh. And what’s funnier than a Llama? (laughs at his own joke)”

“You may call me a joker. But I’d like to get serious for a minute. The song I’m singing tonight is my favourite track for celebrating love with that... special someone. There’s nothing like being swept up by it’s deep, profound lyrics. It’s a tune that really gets me in the mood for romance. I can’t wait to sing it for you tonight.”

“Llama out!” 

ON STAGE CLUES:

Song choice: “She Bangs” by Ricky Martin 

Look/Costume: Dressed as a tourist - “hawaiian” style shirt,, photo camera around his neck. Llamas tongue out of his mounth, on the side. 

Height: he is around 180cm - about the same height as host Nick (their shoulders are on about the same height)

Mic hand: Left 

Talking: “umm.. This whole costume just spoke to me... My vibe... I wear digs like this in real life.” (answering the question about his costume & it’s looks) 

GUESSES:

Drew Carey (TV host/comedian/actor...)

POSSIBLE MEANING OF CLUES.

23.3 Wool = His show (The Drew Carey Show) had, during it’s 9-season long run, a total of 233 episodes. 

Photo canera prop = His hobby is photography. Actually, it’s more than just a hobby - he has been accredited press photographer during many (sports) events.  

Radio = He was a radio operator during the time he served in the Marine Corps. Also..he’s hosted a radio show (radio DJ) during his later career 

Red light in the room = photography reference. In the DarkRoom red light is used when developing photo film/photographs.

Buddha figurine (Dalai Lama/Llama joke) = He is a buddhist. 

Joker = he is a joker aka comedian 

Seattle = He is the co-owner of a Seattle Football Club. 

Playing cards = He took part in the celebrity poker game in 2003, where he did better than Jack Black did (played against Jack Black)

Nerd herd = He did take part in Zack levis (Chuck) “Nerd herd” lightsaber race one time at a Comic-Con convention. 

Nerd herd = his show (DCS) & character were/was about nerds/was a nerd

Llama’s side tongue = early in his stand-up comedy days he had a joke with a side-tie (it looked visually very similar to what the llama’s tongue looks like - he just added some wires & tape to do “the trick” of swinging the tie to the side)

BONUS: He knows last years winner, “The Fox Mask” - they did “Whose Line is it Anyway” together, so... connection... 

SPOILER ALERT: Llama is the mask who will be voted off next - in ep 2 (on Wed, Feb 5th). But while his voice might not be as trained as some other contestants, I loved his stage energy, and the comedy/fun he brought! One more song coming from him! And no, I am not sharing some secret info - they “accidentally” revealed the first two contestants, who get unmasked, so it’s been revealed by the network...for those, who notice small details...

MISS MONSTER 

CLUES:

Location: Lady’s restroom/bathroom. The moster getting ready (coming hair, applying hairspray...) 

Location: school hallway - lockers 

VISUAL CLUES:

Sign:  (image) ladies restroom 

Itmes on the counter in bathroom/dressing room: Furspray (hairsray) can,  pink bottle of some beauty product, three crystals (stones), a piece of sequin fabric 

Key/Keychain: a single (old style) key with a keychain that says “FUN” #FUN #KEY = FUNKY = “QUEEN OF FUNK” 

Purple furry diary/good luck charm/cosmetics bag/pencil box (with a face + kitty ears & unicorn horn) + a glittery pen 

Lockers: Lockers numbered 10 (the ones she opens) & 11 (the one next to it)...with no other lockers having numbers on them 

Miss Monster Locker: filled with images of S1 Monster, scrapbook flowers..etc...

Piece of paper on the locker door: Monster Hits.

Photograph of a cityscape (skyline with many skyscrapers) on the locker door [if I could only see the image better to know which city it is on it, that’d be one more clue]

AUDIO CLUES/VOICE OVER:

“When you become famous, people  want you to look or act in a certain way. They forget that you started off as just a shy little monster.” 

“It didn’t take long for me to be misunderstood. So I’m here to set the record straight. Just like my favourite creature in Season 1 did. The Monster. He made me feel. He re-wrote his story. It was fire!" 

“And now this performer in pink wants to follow in his furry footsteps, But darlings... I’m nervous. Will you still love me without knowing my name?”

ON STAGE CLUES: 

Song choice: “Something to Talk about” by Bonnie Raitt

Look/Costume: pink & purple/violet furry costume with a bowtie

Height: she is short-ish (shorter than host Nick). She looks very short (barely 5 feet - more Dolly P. height 152cm than Chaka K height 162cm)

Mic hand: Right 

Talking: NO ON-STAGE TALKING!

GUESSES: 

Chaka Khan 

Dolly Parton (since the total number of Grammy noms that the 18 contestants have in combined in 69 & Robot as the first revealed one has had 24-25 of them, that leaves only 44-45 for everyone else, that rules out this person, because she alone has had 46 nominations...compared to C. Khan’s 22 noms)

POSSIBLE MEANING OF CLUES. 

Number 10 = She has 10 Grammy Awards/wins. (interestinly: both D. Parton & C. Khan have 10 Grammy wins!)

Monster Hits = she has had (many) hit songs during her career 

He made me feel = She has a song by the title “I Feel You” (1984 hit)  

It was fire = She has a song by the title “Through the Fire” (1985)

Will you love me - that is (word for word) the title of of her her hit songs, “Will You Love Me?” (2007)

It was fire = She wrote the hit song “Fule to the Flame” (1967 hit) for Skeeter Davis. 

Will you still love me? = She has/wrote a song titled “I will always love you” 

Furspray/Hairsray = he was/is known for her big hair/haircut (managing that probably takes lots of hairspray)

FUN = FUN(K) #FUN KEY [FUN:KI] - she’s kinda the “queen of funk” (one of her albums is titled “FUNk This” (btw: Pun intended by her!) 

TURTLE 

CLUES

Location: school’s track & field event (Balzano Track Field) - contestants getting ready to run. The slow turtle surrounded by fast bunnies, all preparing for the event. [Slow & steady (turtle) wins the race]

Location: Schools track & field event - BANG! The race begings. The three other contestants (MIB as bunnies - wearing pink bunny ears - starting the race with a head start, all jumping on their blue bouncy balls)

VISUAL CLUES:

Turtle vs bunnies 

BANG! in comic style - to mark the start of the race 

The others (three bunnies) bouncing on blue balls whe n the race begins 

Surf board - the turtle poliching/cleaning his poink & blue surf board 

Pins on the track...popping the blue jumpy balls 

Grilling burgers on an (outside) grill...on the track field. 

Turtle crossing the finish line first (bunnies just going in circles, being stopped by pins on the way, or other reasons), as he has time to do other things & take it slowly, and then still get there first...with a burger in hand & winning the golden medal.

AUDIO CLUES/VOICE OVER:

"At the starting-line of my career I was surrounded by other hungry new-comers. It felt like everyone around me was fighting tooth-and-nail for the dream. And I watched as many of those stars burned too brightly, too quickly, and then fizzled down”

“I’m a turtle, because I’m always taking it step-by-step.”

“Slow and steady wins the race. But now I feel like I’m ready to break out of my shell. After years of preparation I would love to make a big splash. So I don’t want anyone to cross that finish line before me.” 

ON STAGE CLUES:

Song choice: “Kiss from a Rose” by Seal 

Look/Costume: Punk/Rock-style, dressed in leather (pants, jacket), has a spike (hair)

Height: Short-ish (shorter than host Nick) - seems around 175cm. Small in size.

Mic hand: Right 

Talking: “It’s hot. It’s really hot. And it’s heavy!” (when answering how doesn it feel to be in that costume and perform in it)

GUESSES

Jesse McCartney 

Joey McIntyre  PS. I tried connecting the voice to any boy-bands (of 1990s & 2000s), but I coukdnt. Even after some “research” - listening to each possible candidate...and IMO it’s none of them. The voices dont match, the heights doesn’t match---But it did sound like someone, who for me was a one-hit-wonder. Yeah, I only know that one song (and one more) from him... but voice seemed familiar.

POSSIBLE MEANING OF CLUES: 

Surf board = that he is a surfer;  that he is from Cali/Australia/somewhere which is known as being popular among surfers; that he has won Teen Choice Award(s) (this award in in the shape of a surfboard)

being surrounded by other new-comers at the start of his career = either he got his start through a (singing) competition and was one of many contestants fighting for the win AND/OR he got his start in a “boy-band” and was one of the youngsters looking for fame...

Surf board = Teen Choice Awards - winning several TCAs for his first/biggest hit song/album in 2005, and more. And he’s played a surfer character on a TV show

BSB references/connection  - he was the opening act in 2005 for BSB during the European part of the tour. 

Dream = he started in a boy-band with the name “Dream Street”

on stage presence/body language (movements) = very similar to J.M. 

WHITE TIGER 

CLUES: 

Location: Football field. Tiger striking a power/winners pose. 

Location: School hallway, lockers. Tiger walking in, shoving everyone out of his way. 

Locatrion: School library (sitting behind a table, with his legs on the table) 

Location: School hallway, lockers. MIB trying to get him to audition for TMS. MIB (fans) taking selfies with him. 

VISUAL CLUES: 

Golden plate/sign with text: Ultimate champion for clam shucking: 51 clams” (next to a golden clam shell) 

Sign/ad on the wall: “Masked Singer tryouts 5/3.” + images of three past masks included: Eagle, Lion & Raven. Plus the text: “Hurry. Not for long" also written on it. 

Sign on the all with images of past US presidents, including Abe Lincolns & the text/quote “Four Score and Seven Years Ago...” 

The TMS golden mask throphee shown next to the lockers (as Tiger says “let’s party!”)

AUDIO CLUES/VOICEOVER: 

“Ready to meet your next champion? My entire life I’ve sought out perfection, so choosing a mask with unlimited power like the White Tiger was a no-brainer.”

“I’ve had a giant career full of accomplishments. But when I imagine being on stage (and) singing, I’m a big old scared cat.*

“It’s been a while since I did something that scared me, so I’m here to concour yet anither challenge.”  

“What’s my motivation? My fans! I don’t wanna let them down." 

“So now I’m ready to get in that ring and smash the competition.” 

“Let’s party!” 

ON STAGE CLUES: 

Song choice “Ice Ice Baby” by Vanilla Ice 

Look/Costume: Dressed in “Egyptian style"

Height: very tall & big (much taller than host Nick) - over 190cm, looks about 2m tall

Mic hand: R & L (alternates)

Talking: “It’s the most powerful I’ve ever felt. Like I can concour anything. I never wanna take it off” (when answering what did it feel like when he first put on the costume/mask)

POSSIBLE MEANING OF CLUES: 

He played during the 51st  (51 clams) & 53rd  (5/3) Super Bowl games. 

The three past TMS masks shown are all animals that are parts of  names of existing football teams: Ravens, Eagles, Lions. Meaning he is an athlete & specifically plays american football (NFL) 

The Lincoln quote translates to “87 years ago...”, so number 87 is the clue here. This could be a reference to player No. 87. 

He has had a very succesful career in his own field (sports). Singing is not his main job.

IF the voice-overs were done later, not during initial filming, then it’s possible that “smash” relates to the person smashing a lego-statue of a TV host during 2019/2020 New Years. Which in itself was supposed to be about his famous “Gronk Spike” during football games. 

A tiger (albeit “regular”, not white) was one of the characters & costumes + name of the sports team in the Katy Perry video “Swish Swich”, where this athlete also appeared. 

The Golden (Golden Mask) trophe - most likely a reference to his many wins (the trophees he/his team has won)

GUESSES: 

Rob Gronkowski (Gronk, athlete, 198cm) = 99% certain it’s him 

Because of the height alone (seems to be around/almost 2m = 6 feet 5) there are not that many possibilities at all. Even if we don’t listen to that voice or consider the clues. Based on height alone it can basiclaly be only one of these names: Dave Bautista (198cm); The Rock (196cm); Hulk Hogan (201cm); Tyler Perry (196cm); Brad Garrett (204cm); Joe Manganiello (196cm); Jeff Goldblum (194cm); Jason Mamoa (193cm); Tom Brady (193cm)..or the likes...

Even other possible names, like the ones listed by the panel, are not valid guesses, because of their height: John Cena for example is actually only 185cm tall. Also... several of these tall men are bigger/more muscular, so that makes it even easier to determine the name based on only the physical appeance...without even listening to the clues. 

ROBOT 

First mask to be voted out in ep 1

Havent listed his clues, cause there’s no use for them anymore, as he was voted off. 

With his 86 tattoos he makes up for about half of all the 160 tattoos the 18 contestants have combined. With his 24-25 Grammy nominations he makes up about 1/3 of all the 69 noms the 18 contestants have combined. And quite many of the 88 gold records the 18 contestants have combined,  belong to him (I don’t know the exact number, but most/all of his 10+ albums have gone gold, I think) - exact number depends on how they count it for this list.

<<<<< THIS IS WHAT GOES ON IN MY HEAD AFTER EVERY TMS SHOW/EPISODE. THIS IS HOW I CATEGORIZE THE INFO I HAVE INTO FOLDERS IN MY MIND. THIS IS HOW SPECIFIC I AM, AND HOW INTO DETAILS I GO. THIS IS HOW MUCH I PAY ATTENTION (while, most likely, missing a ton of more hints that I’ll only notice during re-watch) I JUST DECIDED TO WRITE IT DOWN...FOR ONCE. 

BUT... unless I decide to cut some sleep time to do this again, I am probabky not gonna do this after every episode. Possibly for the first episode of every Group (so beside ep 1, also ep 4 & ep 7)

#THE MASKED SINGER #TMS #SPOILER #TMS SPOILER #TMS US #THE MASKED SINGER USA #THE MASKED SINGER SEASON 3 #TMS S3 #TMS SEASON 3 #THE MASKED SINGER S3 #MASKED SINGER

[missjackil]

A Dose of SPN Positivity!

For those who know me, they know I love this show.... flaws and all! im critical sometimes, but not overly. Bottom line, I am addicted to the story and Im in love with Sam and Dean.  With Season 14 about to start, and we’re all getting antsy, too much negativity has been flying around, so I want to share some things i love most about the show, and maybe make some of you reflect for a moment and think “Yeah, that is pretty great” and smile.  Supernatural has been referred to as “The Little Show That Could” and to me, its such a fitting description. Logically, on the surface, it looks like it just can’t. I mean, how can a fantasy/horror show, survive with such a low budget, light special effects, and not very scary most of the time. I mean hell, they dont even have that many monsters that look like monsters, so why has it lasted longer than a season or 2? Let alone, 14 seasons with no signs of stopping yet. First and foremost is obvious. Sam and Dean and the actors who play them.  This essay will be full of gushing about these boys, so if you dont feel like enduring such a hardship, scroll on past. if that interests you.....

Yes these 2 fabulous men are the life blood of this show. Without them, we’d have nothing. THEY are the reason, this little show can, and does. Even those who like one and not the other, even if they dont realize it, the one they prefer is who they are because of the other. Both of their qualities and flaws can be directly linked to their influence on each other. If for some reason the other was gone for good, the one left will change drastically. As we see when one is dead or in grave danger, albeit temporarily, the other changes. Sam is no longer sweet, laid back and practical, and Dean is no longer funny, charming, and nurturing.  In fact, they both seem to become an amplified version of their brother. When Sam dies, Dean gets quiet, sometimes too quiet. He also gets methodical and focused. You may get lucky and just get shot in the back, but if he chooses to speak, he chooses his words to let you know shits gonna hit the fan. “You have my brother, and you have one chance, just one, to hand him over, and if he isnt in one peice, when I find you, and I WILL find you, I will take you apart” Sam on the other hand is boiling over with emotion. My boy becomes savage. He doesnt always choose a lot of words to say, he gets his whole point across most of the time with “WHERES MY BROTHER???!!!!” This... my friends, is good stuff! These things couldnt be done with such beauty without Jared and Jensen. Their offscreen relationship, whatever it may be, is wonderful. Theres no denying the love and respect they have for each other. They are very supportive of each other, and help make the other better at their job. They’re not typical actors who have a work relationship but otherwise spend time with each other. They genuinely enjoy being together, and this shows on screen. When two people are this good at their jobs, and with each other, you just have to keep watching. Other things I love about the show, are kinda small. Some maybe youve never noticed, but maybe now you will and enjoy them too, like... Brains vs Brawn: At first glance, we all go Sam=brains, Dean=brawn right? But thats not actually the case. Dean is far from stupid, and Sam is nowheres near a wimp. Dean teases Sam about being a nerd, and Sam doesnt mind, he kinda wears his nerdiness like a badge of honor. Dean will never admit to being a nerd, but he is. He’s read Vonnegut, knows every old west cowboy statistic, and likes LARPing. Sam, though a bookworm, is one tough mofo. hes tall and muscular and has shown to be a little freakishly strong. He can also take a great deal of pain. And though Dean is known more to be the fighter, he can be very warm and nurturing. And nerdy Sam can make you shit your pants with just a look if you piss him off just right. I absolutely LOVE this balance!! Its one of my favorite things! Old school vs New; A lot has changed in 14 seasons. The brothers have grown, as well as the story, but their roots are never forgotten. They’re still driving around in the same car. Hell. Baby has become the 3rd lead! Even though they have mom back, they never forgot her, or dad, and both were spoken of often throughout the series. They refer back to old days often, so we can all get a feel of nostalgia when we remember too. Most episodes bring the deep past up in one way or another, I love this! Loss and Death: I know so many of us complain that they die and come back too much, but I have a real appreciation for it, The circumstances are always different, and so are the methonds of coming back. Sometimes the death isnt serious, or they dont “seem” dead, like in First Blood or Dark Side of the Moon, when there may have been an initial “wtf?” we got to see them in heaven, and in first blood, they came right back. However there was deep seriousness in All Hell Breaks Loose, No Rest for the Wicked,  Do You Believe in Miracles, Swan Song, Red Meat and Beat The Devil that you felt the dying brother’s physical pain, and then the emotional pain of the surviving brother.  No matter how many times they die, they still hit these types of episodes out of the park. WE may know theyre coming back, but they dont. it still crushes them and I love this! Sam and Dean’s Sexuality: I love that their sexual natures are different, but theyre both okay. Dean is sexually active, enjoys porn and vocalizes some fantasies, Though Sam can tease him a little, its just brotherly ribbing, its not judgemental or trying to make Dean feel bad. Sam isnt overly sexual, he’s gone many seasons without sex at all. He doesnt appear to enjoy porn, we know he doesnt like strip clubs, and its NOT because he’s unattractive!! Dean teases him but he doesnt try to make him feel bad. When he has heavily suggested that Sam get laid, its just because he wants him to have fun. Dean even said he appreciated that Sam wanted to stay pure and waited. Otherwise, its okay that Sam is (at least kinda) asexual. Neither are shunned or judged because of their sexuality. Winsync: This is one of the greatest things. if they didnt do this, we wouldnt care, we would never say “It would be a much better show if the brothers mirrored each other, or did the same thing at the same time” but for whatever reason, TPTB wanted this, and it works so well! Its an intimacy we can see without the show going OTT bromantic. Its the connection, the closeness, and being soulmates. I LOVE this! Soulmates and Brothers: Normally a show will make soulmates out of lovers. It’s not often they do it with siblings. It helps justify their deep love and devotion. It adds an additional layer to their relationship. It makes them so tied together that they will share eternity in heaven together, and not just in their memories. This was a very good decision made by Kripke and crew, so we will all know they cant live without each other, even if they just lived in different homes. I love this! Meta Madness: Though I dont like all the meta episodes, I do love the fact they can do them, and DO do them. Because the whole premise is the supernatural, nothing is impossible, even AUs and cartoon worlds. Sometimes I might roll my eyes, but its awesome to me that they can experiment this way and see how it goes. I Love this!! The Bros are Oblivious: Sam and Dean have been through basically everything, and have seen and done everything, yet they seem shocked when people say theyre famous, or when they heard people tell stories about them. Occasionally they grasp their importance, like when they tell people they save the world, but they were impressed that Asa fixed killed 5 Wendigo, and had an Angel Blade, and Father Luca met the Pope. I mean God hung out at the bunker and made them pancakes! Their Heads Dont Get Too Big: Every once in a while, TPTB make sure we, and the boys, remember that they are only human. Even if they lock away Satan, kill Death, save God’s life, they’re just men. Remember when Bobby died and Dean was sure he wouldnt because “its just one bullet!” ? I can see how it would seem so silly to Dean, and even to us, that someone who has lived through so much, could die from a stupid little bullet. I think that one of the smartest things the show has done in ages, was to have Sam tortured by Toni and friend. Sam was so bold and cocky (and need I say sexy?) telling Toni he’d been tortured by the devil himself, and what could she do to him... He soon learned Hell torture or not,  cold showers still suck, blow torches to the feet still hurt like hell, and a mortal human can still fuck with his head. And Dean, well he can still be put on the injured reserve list from a jacked up leg. IMO S12 was great for re-humanizing the Winchesters. I love this! Comedy to Tragedy: Some of the best episodes, started out funny and ended in a tear jerker. Mystery Spot, Just My Imagination, and Beat The Devil top my list. I love the emotional rollar coaster, Coming away exhausted from an episode is the bestthing I can ask for! They havent tried it the other way around, tragedy to comedy, and thats good. If you are crying at the beginning and laughing later, it doesnt justify the grief and you may feel let down and hollow after. SPN is great with having some humor in even the most depressing episodes, but they know when using it and leaving it out is best. I love this! Brohugs: My #1 favorite thing, aside from the hug in 6.1, they have all been beautiful. Not once, have the boys lost the love, or even repeated the same hug. Each one conveys a different message, a different emotion, but all say “I love you more than everything” and I wont ever get tired of them! I would do anything for a single hug in my whole life that had such love in it, as any Winchester bro hug! I.LOVE.THIS!! Now I hope if you read this far, you got to smile a few times, and a spark was added to the fire that you fell in love with 14 seasons ago. Here’s to S14, i hope its filled with all of these wonderful things!

#supernatural #show positive #sam winchester #dean winchester #spn forever

[samanthasroberts]

‘I know their vital stats, their romantic histories’: how Sunderland AFC saved me

For this Chinese Jewish Texan, England was a difficult place to feel at home. But all that changed when she discovered football

Thats shite, man! the man behind screams. The discontent in the crowd is reaching a critical mass. Useless twats, snarls a father below, opening a packet of crisps for his nine-year-old son.

I stand frozen, wrapped up in a scarf and down jacket. Who are we yelling at? Why are we so angry?

Its Boxing Day 2012 and Im at the Stadium of Light in Sunderland for my first ever football match. Its freezing cold; it begins to rain. And then it happens. A Sunderland player fires a shot that creeps past the Manchester City goalkeeper and into the bottom corner of the net. The stadium thunders as a sea of 46,000 bodies fall over each other, total strangers hugging their neighbours, while simultaneously jumping up and down. The man next to me screams so loudly in my ear that Im momentarily deaf. Then he turns me towards him, grabs my shoulders, locks eyes with me and shakes my body. Ahhhhhhhhhh! he screams, in happiness and disbelief.

Ahhhhhhh! I scream back, in fear.

***

When I moved to London, I got a job as a junior editor on a luxury lifestyle website. The site was run by a flamboyant man from Croydon named Carlos, with coiffed salt and pepper hair. Never one to pass up an opportunity to show off, Carlos liked to introduce me to visiting VIPs as our New Yorker who speaks fluent Mandarin and went to Harvard.

None of these things was true. I grew up in a small town in Texas: Amarillo. For some reason, Carlos didnt think this as impressive as being from New York (despite Amarillo being the helium capital of the world and the home of Tony Christies sweet Marie). As for fluent in Mandarin, my dad is Chinese, but I speak only broken Mandarin after living and working in Beijing for a few years. I didnt go to Harvard I was rejected but I did go to a university an hour away. None of these things made sense to Carlos, so he went with his own version.

My exchanges with Carlos were stilted. Our interactions ended in awkward silences. He was twice my age and we had nothing in common. But he was well known in London media circles and I was desperate to get him on side.

After Beijing, I assumed it would be a breeze to assimilate in a country where I no longer faced a language barrier. In China, I had spent a good amount of time miming my interactions. I also had to get used to Beijing locals asking me how much money I made, or telling me I was looking fatter than usual. But it was a bluntness I came to embrace: at least I knew where I stood.

Not so in London. The city was so rife with passive aggression that I didnt know when people were being rude or kind. A woman thanked me on the train for moving my bag and I was almost certain what she was really saying was too fucking right. A man squeezed by me on the escalator and the pitch of his seemingly polite May I? was so snide, it nearly brought me to tears. Carlos asked me if I want to do something for him at work and I wasnt sure if it was an order, a helpful suggestion or sarcasm. The words themselves were unfailingly polite, but it was all in the tone. Other Americans I knew suffered the same way. I genuinely dont know if my colleagues are making fun of me or being nice, a friend from Chicago confessed one night over drinks.

London can be a tough city for newcomers to crack. Compared with the US, people prefer to keep to themselves, especially in public. Im shy, so this was wonderful at first. No one approaches you to chat. I once fell in a crowded street in broad daylight and began the, Im fine, Im fine, honestly protest. But no one had stopped. I lay on the ground, impressed with peoples dedication to not getting involved with strangers. I began to think that I might never find a way to break through the famous British reserve. Would I ever find common ground with Carlos? If only there was some magic key.

And then one day, I witnessed a man bite another man on live TV. This happened during a football match that was on in a pub I happened to be in. I was immediately intrigued: by the biting, the drama, the getting caught, the primal emotion of the incident. I didnt realise it at the time, but this was it: my in.

On a bus, I sat with a couple of friends who were discussing live scores; soon, the entire upper deck had joined the conversation. It was like a portal to another dimension in which everyone was chatty, friendly and open on public transport.

Football was everywhere, it turned out. Once I noticed this, I began to absorb football facts, though only certain things stuck. I loved it when footballers cried. Maybe it was the persistent myth of the stiff upper lip but seeing a player moved to tears, to me, showed he cared more than anyone else. It wasnt like watching an actor pretend to tear up. This shit was real.

I loved any sort of drama on and off the pitch. Family tensions, love problems, scandals, shoving matches; before long, I became a reliable source of useless, soap opera-esque information about players.

I also became a fervent Sunderland supporter. Why would a Chinese girl from Texas living in Highbury, north London, become a Sunderland supporter? Because I had married one. Ian, born and bred in Sunderland, talked about his teams players as if they were his family. That made them my family, too. I knew their names, their shirt numbers, their vital stats, their romantic histories. I was also a natural fit for Sunderland because I love an underdog and by God, I had chosen the underdog of underdogs. The big clubs, with their expensive superstars, were boring to me. Our wins were rare, but they were so much sweeter for it.

I watched televised matches, sometimes without Ian if he was busy or out of town, something that had my friends and family baffled. During visits home to Texas, Ian and I zealously woke early to catch the Sunderland game. My father would observe me, puzzled. My mother, who is Jewish, was also bewildered but said, Well, you were the most athletic of our family of klutzes. It was my childhood best friend Jori who called me out. We were in a Waffle House diner surrounded by grassy plains. I asked Ian if he knew how Sunderlands relegation rivals had fared in their six-pointer, when she interrupted me. Are you talking about British soccer? Who are you? I told her the truth: Im just a girl, standing in front of the TV, hoping a footballer scores a winning goal in the last minute of a high-stakes match and then weeps about it.

A young fan lets rip as Sunderland take on Man United. Photograph: Getty

Do you know who really liked football? Carlos. We soon developed a rapport. Every Monday, hed rush to my desk and wed discuss the weekends matches. He was obsessed with playing style, formations and league tables. Meanwhile, I was the expert on the fights, the crying and the hissy fits. Suddenly, we were friends. He wasnt just my scary boss who got annoyed that I didnt know who Lynyrd Skynyrd were. We were bonding.

They say that to assimilate in a foreign country, you have to speak the language, and now I finally did. Did I make friends from learning about football? I would go out on a limb and say that yes, I did. I made friends with Dave at the Three store when I sat there for two hours after accidentally flushing my phone down the toilet. I bonded with a Ghanaian driver as we discussed a former Sunderland player from his country. In a hotel in the Lake District, there was a communication breakdown with a concierge that ended happily when we both agreed that Diego Costa was a jerk and Jermain Defoe a great goal scorer. When cab rides were too silent, no problem. Lets talk about the match, driver.

***

Dinner in the north-east of England is different from dinner in Texas. Here the food is cooked well-done, the weather is colder and greyer, the company more polite, the table quieter.

Ians dad, brother and uncles are lifelong Sunderland season ticket holders. Ask them a question about what they want to eat, or their favourite movie, or their preference for boxers or briefs, and they will reply, Im easy. Suggest that Jack Rodwell is a decent footballer and they are unleashed animated, passionate, opinionated. I enjoy bantering with Ians brother and dad about football, but we argue a lot mostly because there is one thing I havent been able to wrap my head around since my first game.

After that first Boxing Day match, on the walk from the Stadium of Light to the car with Ian, his dad, his uncle and his brother, I ask the question thats on my mind.

Why do we yell mean things at our own players?

Silence. And then: They just didnt show up. For most of the match, they were bloody awful, Ian says. Good use of we, though, he adds.

But shouldnt we be supporting them? Encouraging them?

Ian shakes his head and sighs.

You know, like being positive and lifting them up? I was still trying to make sense of why 46,000 people would call themselves supporters when they gave the most vitriolic, abusive commentary on their own players. Their support was downright terrifying.

This was your first match, Jess. Weve suffered years of pain while watching players go through the motions. Ive been enduring this for 25 years, Ian says. Twenty-six years, Ians older brother says. His dad: Try 60 years. And finally, I understand the British subtext: You are a wide-eyed idiot.

You got me into this: Jess with her husband, Ian. Photograph: Pal Hansen for the Guardian

At my high school in Texas, there was a club called Senior Spirits. Senior Spirit members met to boost the egos of our sports teams and rally other students to support those teams. To quote from the yearbook, their mission was to make posters and give our school spirit. In the photo, a group of 20 girls wearing matching T-shirts and ponytails, grin at the camera, 100% heartfelt.

These werent cheerleaders. And they werent affiliated with the Steppers, the ultra-serious dancers who performed at pep rallies, the hour-long ceremonies dedicated to whipping up school spirit. Nor were they the student marching band that played during football matches to help stoke, yes, even more team spirit. Team spirit was like an elusive ghost permeating the school and we all had to worship it.

That spirit was partial to posters with marker pen and glitter, to ponytails, to cakes shaped like American footballs and prayers before the big game. It revelled in exclamation marks. It did not like folded arms and booing and sarcasm. It did not like being called a useless twat.

Apparently team spirit isnt a thing in north-east England. So how do English secondary schools pump up their sports teams? I imagine the halls of these schools are lined with posters of a different sort: You better not screw this up, Jones! and Dont do any of that long-ball shit, Gibbons.

I still struggle with this complete inversion, but it unlocked something core in the English mentality how ingrained the cynicism is, as well as the tendency to proceed from a position of cautious defeat. Expect to lose so it hurts less when it happens, and if we win, no harm done.

Diehard football fans remain sceptical of me. At matches, I ask questions. I get looks when I yell cheerful encouragement. I cant stop shouting, At least you tried! every time a player takes a shot but fails to score. Some have the gall to question my passion for football until I do well at the pub quiz football round. If you love something, does it matter if you love it for all the wrong reasons? Apparently, to them, yes. But one thing was for sure: I was emotionally committed.

In May 2016, at the end of that years season, Sunderland were on the brink of doom, as we are every year. Hundreds of fans gathered at the Old Red Lion in Angel, north London, for one of the last matches of the season. I am 5ft 2in, so I left Ian and his friends and waded through Mackems to get to a good vantage point to watch the match. We were playing Everton, and this would seal everything: would we stay up and relegate bitter rivals Newcastle in the process?

Awaydays at the Drayton Park pub in north London, before taking on Arsenal at the Emirates. Photograph: Pal Hansen for the Guardian

The first time we scored, someones pint of beer, spilt in jubilant joy and shock, doused my head. On the second goal, the shouts were deafening. On the third, a man threw his arms around me and together we jumped up and down and screamed with pure joy. I left the pub dazed, half-deaf, hair soaked in booze and my face aching from smiling.

I became a UK citizen last year. At a city town hall, I swore my allegiance to the Queen and stumbled through the national anthem with 17 other newly minted UK citizens. But that moment didnt come close to the buoyant feeling of pure joy and belonging I felt in the arms of a stranger as we celebrated the victory of our beloved team. If the root of football passion is said to be a sense of family and place, then this Chinese Jewish Texan has found her new home.

Unfortunately, that home is sometimes a den of pain and despair. By the time you read this, we will have played three Championship matches in the new season. Ian assures me we will not have won one: Sunderland havent won a league game in August or September for four years in a row.

In April this year, we were finally relegated from the Premier League with four matches left to play.

Useless losers! I yell at the players as Sunderland fail to score even one goal. Its all over. Nothing to hope for now, no Match Of The Day to look forward to.

As I shout at the players, Ian pats me hard on the back. Well done, he says. I look at him, confused. Now you know what it feels like to hate your own team.

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Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/17/i-know-their-vital-stats-their-romantic-histories-how-sunderland-afc-saved-me/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/09/17/i-know-their-vital-stats-their-romantic-histories-how-sunderland-afc-saved-me/