#bc they have no interest or literally anything to live for

[faetreides]

Modern coryo whos trying to sorta maybe manipulate his gf by being obsessed and then not reading her texts for 3 days but the gf is literally the same so it’ll be like

r: “heyyy” and then a day later he replies “heyaaa” and then it goes on like that for a week until he cracks and sends her 15 messages in the span of 4 minutes

cw: feminization/fem label “gf” but the reader is still only intended to be afab, the ask has she/her pronouns but i don’t use them in the writing, manipulation and toxic behavior, typical coryo/modern!coryo warnings, love bombing, not canon to the main au, black cat reader ish, reader has a shower in their dorm bc i say so 🤫, male masturbation

Now Coryo wouldn’t do this during your relationship, despite his best attempts to play it cool, you make him panic and he’s immediately resorting to rich boy love bombing (trips, those ridiculously expensive boxed roses, 999999999 rounds of oral on his yacht, a summer house, etc.) followed by baby trapping. He’s not stupid enough to try something like that deeper into your relationship, for him it’s about making sure the foundation is as solid as possible and not shaking it up.

This would really only happen before you even start dating, after he’s bumped into you in the dorms enough times to wear you down into giving him your number. He’s still in his “i have to the most mysterious person alive” mindset and he hasn’t quite shed the fuckboy persona yet. He doesn’t seek anybody out or anything, it was love at first sight with you unfortunately, he’ll just imply that that you’re another contact in a long list. (You’re the only one in his favorites 💀)

You’re smart enough to be wary, too involved in academics and proving yourself to go sniffing around Coriolanus Snow. You don’t really talk to a lot of people, and you’re not interested in a swarm of meaningless interactions. You’re just grateful that he stopped calling you so much, learning that you very much prefer texting. He’s the king of the “hey u up?” text, and you have the flattest look on your face as you reply “Yes.” and turn your phone face down. Exchanges like happen over and over.

Does your heart flutter when he insists on walking you to class and pecking your cheek at the door? Yes but you’ll roll your eyes and make a big deal out of wiping it off. Are you intrigued by how much he hauls ass to get you your coffee order whenever he senses that you need it (because he can, he’s like spiderman but lame)? Well, yes, but he must be playing some kind of game with you. Has a cliche bet with his fraternity brothers over your assumed virginity maybe. The more you’re determined to not fall for it, the more you find yourself slipping as the days go by.

Just when you turn your head when he pecks your cheek outside the lecture hall, expecting the gesture more than dreading it, he gives you a blank stare and turns on his heel. You take a second to blink and then shrug, it’s no skin off you back if Coriolanus decides to be normal for once. You definitely do not have a bit of a scowl throughout the entire session. (he nearly lost it when you didn’t react at the lack of a kiss, he kicked the wall and almost broke his foot)

He’s back to the “heyy” texts at random hours, responding to your “Hey.” that came a day later two days after that. He’s screaming into his pillow and pacing his grandma’am’s gardens, glaring at the staff pruning the shrubs. Coryo would rather die than admit defeat though, so he hardens his resolve. You’ll break eventually. You on the other hand are living normally, slurping ramen and working on essays. You’ve learned not get your hopes up over a pipe dream, the idea that someone like him would genuinely care about you being so laughable that you get over it rather quickly. You may be from different economic classes, but a man’s attention is never a necessity. That an he’s far from the only trust fund kid in the world.

A week later, your phone goes off in the middle of the night. You step out of the shower and dry yourself off, walking over to your bed and picking it up. To your surprise, the notification from Coriolanus isn’t another dry message, it’s several videos. They all look dark and fuzzy, ranging from 30 seconds to 10 minutes. In some of the thumbnails you can see flashes of bare skin. You click on the first one and are immediately faces with Coriolanus Snow’s sweaty abs.

You’re frozen as he eventually splatters jizz all over them, the camera work is shaky and the flash exposes too much for your liking. You can see his abdominal muscles twitch in the aftermath of his orgasm. He drags his fingers through his own cum and smears it over the camera, giving you a pov of what it’d be like to have your face covered in it.

Your phone chimes again.

Stalker: turn the sound on for the rest ;) see u at the car wash next friday, babe ❤️

You block him (after you save the videos and check the charge on your vibrator).

#what an apt contact name for him 🤐 #modern!coriolanus snow #coriolanus snow x you #coriolanus snow smut #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus x you #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus smut #coryo snow #coryo snow x you #coryo snow x reader #⚰️.deaddove #coryo snow smut #coryo x you #coryo x reader #coryo smut #tbosas #tbosas x you #tbosas x reader #the hunger games #the hunger games x you #the hunger games x reader #coriolanus snow fic #coriolanus snow fanfiction #yandere smut #dark fic #tom blyth #college au #male yandere smut #tw toxic behavior

[eldrtchmn]

personal rant incoming

#i haaate when ppl coming with this money can't make you happy monologue #when they clearly never had to worry about not having money #not having worry about food bc u don't have money for it #or paying bills #and he can just do whatever he wants go on a year long vacation to travel around the world #like how stupid do you have to be to think that??? not having to work for a year guess what thatade you happy I bet #so none of this bullshit #if I had enough money to pursue what I like to go to uni I'd be so much happier if I had more money to help my sisters I'd be so much more #happier #fck these ppl honestly #money can solve so much of my problems #fix probably all of them #but whoever says these just a boring ass person who can't do anything with their money #bc they have no interest or literally anything to live for #I'm angry sorry 🙄😡🤬

[aroanthy]

i love how fraught and complicated discourse around various utena characters ‘dying’ is when anthy is literally stabbed to death eternally by a million swords imbued with human hatred. and then utena gets stabbed to death by them also. like. ‘death’ is incredibly interesting in rgu because most of the time it’s this ambiguous figurative thing that has interesting implications re: ohtori as a closed-off world one can escape. we are all trapped in our coffins. mamiya is the only named character with a grave. nemuro memorial hall functions as one all the same. ruka is implied to have died in the hospital— was he dead all along? who was the boy we saw for these two episodes? is this dead boy the same boy, or is this just another coincidence from the shadow girls, cutting like a knife? it’s heavily implied that akio and anthy murder kanae by poisoning her, adding to the previous implication that they were poisoning mr ohtori too, but there are no perceptible consequences of this. kanae’s absence is not felt. she’s fed an apple slice. what happens to the bodies? we know what happened to the 100 boys, but what about everyone else? and so on and so forth. ‘death’ is a tricky thing in utena, i think it’s constantly functioning on figurative and literal levels in very different ways for very different purposes. dios died. dios was dying. dios didn’t die. he grew up. etc etc

#what am i trying to say here? #idk! think about all of the pieces you have #dying is complicated in ohtori in countless different ways #and i find it boring to see so much ‘this character is dead and that’s it’ stuff #when death is used farrrrrrr more figuratively than some ppl give credit for #and i think the movie too does wonderful things with death #and what ‘dying’ really means #being disbelieved. being forgotten. being rejected. haunting despite this #much more interesting to think about wrt commentary on abusive relationships than it is #to think about what?? oh me when my brother died but plot twist he’s alive and can walk on this road all cool. like????? #akio doesn’t have the power to make himself revenant #he THINKS he does and he absolutely has power when he’s alive and he imbues that power with such meaning that it does live on after him #but ANTHY. anthy is the one struggling with herself and her feelings and the impact of trauma and abuse (that power!!) in aou #he’s dead? he died? she brought him back through her memories? or she’s left him (metaphorical death) and he’s haunting her?? #all such interesting interpretations #i haven’t mentioned touga bc i don’t have the energy today. if dead and just illusion of others memories then why active. why awful #like in aou akio is only Obviously scummy when he’s alive. his illusory self is based upon anthy’s love for him #if anime!touga is nothing more than nanami/whoever’s memories of him before he died……. why does he actively choose to suck again and again #like nanami wouldn’t do that. unless it was meant to be a subconscious thing like ooo he’s dead all along but that’s not what her arc is #it’s not ‘he’s been dead all along’ literally or figuratively. it’s ‘he’s unsafe and i don’t want him’ #sigh. once again i am asking people to think about nanami and touga’s dynamic through touga’s eyes #it’s so interesting to me how people forget to consider his motivations or feelings on ANYTHING #like sure his motivations and feelings are scummy but they’re interesting!!!!! they intrigue me!!!! #compel me even #anyway ignore how i said i didn’t have the energy for this and then typed it all out anyway #dais.txt

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

you know if we do accept the last epilogue-esque sequence as a sort of dream/wish of ted's and therefore not necessarily canon, very funny if we then simply go "yeah, trent's book is called 'the lasso way' actually. he didn't change that. nope."

#listen on one hand #i think that like #i don't think ted actually changed trent's mind about the title #i think trent changed it because ted asked him to #and like that's especially interesting bc he even made a point of being like #'tell me if you disagree with anything and i'll tell you why you're wrong' #but he respects ted; more than that he likes him and he wants him to like the book--like him #anyone else and trent would have told them to fuck off but ted? ted asking him to change the title? yeah #i think he didn't agree with 'it not being about him'--and not bc of any feelings he may have for ted--but if we accept that him changing #the title is canon then like. he did it because ted asked. nothing more nothing less #maybe he felt he owed it to ted as the subject of the book; maybe he just respected him too much not to #maybe it's partially bc of his feelings; maybe it's because he just couldn't say no to ted #but it's ultimately just. because ted asked him. #and trent respects him; trusts him; cares about him #and that's pretty heartwrenching #but like on the other hand if we say 'no that was ted's wishufl thinking trent definitely went 'sorry ted it's called the lasso way'' #also like.... him being like. like quietly not changing it and if ted said something him just. being like #ted. i respect you. i care about you. i trust you. but with all due respect absolutely not #yes it isn't ONLY about you but YOU made this happen. YOU are special and YOU have a place here whether you can stay forever or not #yes it's about the team and the coaches yes you aren't a one man band but ted. TED. you touched lives. you changed lives. and that was YOU. #that was you and your philosophy and your attitude. #you made richmond what it is today. yes the team deserve credit too for the kind of bond they have now but YOU facilitated that #none of the coaches currently here woudl be coaches if not for you. the diamond dogs wouldn't exist. literally every single one #of our friends--OUR friends--wouldn't be where they are and probably wouldn't be as happy #you got through to people over and over again who were hurting and lashing out. to rebecca. to roy. to jamie. to nate. to me. #and you can be humble but there's being humble and there's acting like you don't matter to any of us like you didn't have an impact #like you can just leave without a trace. we don't blame you for leaving--i especially don't--but acting like we won't miss you and like #your time with all of us--our time--meant nothing is more insulting than it is humble because we /love you/ #and yes. it was the goddamn lasso way that built this place #this community.

[capelizabeth]

taylor’s worst sin MUSICALLY is putting the best songs on the deluxe edition because from the bottom of my heart what the FUCK was that???????

#taylor swift #the tortured poets department #jack antonoff when i catch you jack antonoff #get AWAY from her #they’re not doing anything interesting together anymore #like i was listening to the regular version and it was like this is goddamn elevator music #like god this might be worse than midnights even #the only songs that stuck out to me were loml and the smallest man who ever lived #i can do it with a broken heart was pretty fun and i did like the florence feature #but daddy i love him is quite literally one of her worst songs ever i’m so serious #not just bc it’s about ratty healy it’s so bad #i was giving the album maybe a 6.5/10 then i got to the 2am tracks #with loml and tsmwel rating a lot higher but still #but god aaron CARRIED these 2am tracks #the theme is still there but it’s like a completely different album it’s so much better #why is it like this???? #who’s idea was this???? #bc the main album kinda sucks #jack antonoff ur dead to me #i need relisten and get some sleep before i have a ranking #bc rn i do think the 3am tracks did fall off a get a little dreary towards the end #anyway it’s 3am i need to go to bed #ellie chats

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

feeling weird mixed feelings atm and I can't really logic them away, ig? on the one hand I'm completely apathetic about it. on the other hand there's a part of me that's absolutely horrified that I could do something like that. the fact that it's still a consistent low-level pain the whole time also doesn't help. anyway those kinds of thoughts are then making me want to harm again to cope with them but also a) it's manageable and b) I currently have a deep horror of self-inflicted pain after the last few days apparently.

#more specific blatherings in the tags so im gonna get them below the read more in case anyone doesn't want to read it #tw sh #because yes this is about the last few days and im gonna add a few more words to get the rest below the read more #the fact that while they aren't as deep as i've ever gone before they are unquestionably in volume far exceeding any #before. not that i count at the time or anything but there are at least sixty new cuts from the last week so no wonder it's painful #but yeah it's just. an interesting emotional feeling once the pressure that triggered them is gone #i don't know i don't understand myself really #glad i have a psych appointment monday really #if i didn't have one booked i'd probably be booking one about now #also bothered by how visible the ones on my wrist are going to be. #hopefully the redness will go away soon bc i don't think they're quite healed yet #teatree oil is helping tho so hopefully they won't be TOO obvious #the location means that yeah they will be visible but hopefully not too too much #and after all i have only for-sure hit the fat layer twice. maybe a few other times. there are a couple taking ages to heal atm #so they might've idk. and i haven't gone any deeper than that #honestly with the wrist ones the fact is that it was blunt and i couldn't #sharpen it at hte time. perhaps tmi but yeah this may have saved my life and or my hand function #but i might be overstating it. anyway apparently that was three weeks and one day ago?? wow #guys that entire day i was convinced i wasn't going to live to see the morning. the WHOLE DAY #i literally have a commie newspaper on my desk currently because they tried selling it at uni and i was so existential i was just like. #'what is life. what is money. who cares' and bought it. see this is the funny story i referred to. i can elaborate #personal #puddleglum hours #tw suicide

[spinoff-antithesis]

(muth being music theory!)

#FUCK IT MY OWN EDITION OF THE ODDLY SPECIFIC POLLS BC THESE ARE FUN #me when i've been obsessed with space/time stuff since i was a KID its more an interest than hyperfixation rn but man. #media with any of those?? i am OBSESSED (star wars rottmnt movie etc etc) like i hyperfixated on dr who for a year in middle school #the skateboard one is so funny. in high school my guard instructor saw me with a friend's pennyboard & immediately said no. #me when i was notoriously clumsy in middle + high school so everyone i knew was like. “this is a bad idea” when i did anything #my first semester of college i bought a longboard off someone then 5months later i turned around & ate SHIT it was so funny in retrospect #anyway fun sage lore i have only ever heavily injured the left side of my body. my knee + elbow and the SAME FUCKING TOOTH. TWICE. #also i have a high pain tolerance. like idk how or when but in middle school it just got Really Strong. me when i injure myself and just #live with it for a year before it becomes a concern and i get told to get an xray (i will live with a fractured knee the rest of my life) #also when i fell off my skateboard and ate shit my first concern was “ah fuck my glasses did i break my nose” and #“nah my elbow isnt broken! my arm is just rly sore from how i landed on it” (readers. it was in fact fractured.) #like i literally went “no im fine we dont need to tell my mom or go to the er” and my friends said “call your mom and go to the er” #me spitting out my tooth and blood bc i also busted my lip: that hurt. time to hobble back to my dorm. #anyway hiding this one in the tags bc i will never not just ignore my issues LMAO did it with my ptsd dx and i will continue to do it #another incredibly hyperspecific thing: oh this doesnt seem normal! im gonna ignore it and hope it goes away #these symptoms match up to something? nah i'm sure it's not that! (proceeds to get dx'd with ptsd five months later)

[cinna-bunnie]

i had a fun day 2 day ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა everyone has been so nicey 2 me all day from the minute i left my house earlier ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა ♡⁠

i went to a Retreat for the first time for work earlier 0: and I did SO good for being up since 2am it didn't even feel like it 💀

it was so chill i drove like an hour away but Away from the city so there wasn't rly traffic and the mountains r so pretty 2 drive thru (❁´◡`❁) got some rain n v low clouds and since it's autumn there's all these pretty colors. i took an edible on the way n was just jammin out n enjoying the scenery among the many safe opportunities 2 look

and then at the thing we got 2 do different ice breakers n go on decently long breaks; i got 2 hang in different groups n actually Talk w a bunch of ppl which i never have time for omg. it's nice working at a legal nonprofit, i would NOT want to do this with corporate mfs !! 😹

went around n said hii to the enbies and i ran up a hill that looked a lot smaller than it was, i made it like 80% of the way before my legs were immediately like no girl we're done !! but my brain was like but it's Right There, and i struggled 2 finish the climb but I Did !! ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა and i was so so tired i do not remember ever being that winded before 💀 getting down was so much slower n worse bc my legs were Done and when i finally made it to the bottom i laid flat on my back for like 15m, and when when i made it back to sit n chill i still need like 10 more minutes akskska. i do not b exercising !! i just wanted 2 play it looked fun and i got excited (⁠｡⁠ﾉ⁠ω⁠＼⁠｡⁠)

in between things i was working on my sister's choker n kept winding up w a group of ppl around me 2 talk to about it and just talk 2 in general n the company was rly nice (❁´◡`❁) ♡ had a lot of different kinda talks 2day!! everyone is a sweetie!! some ppl r so funny n chill and i rly hope 2 get 2 talk more casually w people perhaps As Friends when i go in 👉👈

there's one girl in particular who is rly cute n sweet and i want 2 see her again ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა when I got home finally i had 2 hop on my work laptop real quick 2 look up her name again 2 make sure i didn't forget ☝️😌 we do not work at the same office but hii i am visiting next week 🐇

yippee!!!! ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა !!!

#i think i have become an introverted extrovert at some point 0: #which is rly nice bc my social anxiety was SO bad at the beginning of the year like i didn't even know where to start skskdksk #but i kinda figured it out? but it's also just being me? idk.. much 2 think. but i made good progress #i am getting a good grade in being funny and nice and talking to people !! #i want 2 kiss someone on the forehead #omg but if there's ANYONE who deserves a kiss it's this old lady who lives a few buildings down on the way to my car #where EVERY time i see her she always has something so so sweet to tell me about how i look #today she said I'm always looking fancy (⁠｡⁠ﾉ⁠ω⁠＼⁠｡⁠) ♡⁠ and more but that's the main thing i remember besides the small talk #and the first time we met she asked me if i was a model fr and she's told me I'm cute and I'm just like PLEASE SKDKDKS #i can't fully tell if you're just really sweet or kinda 👀 at me but girl u r so sweet like hello do u Want a hug or a kiss ?? i love u !! #old ladies have a warmth they fill u with that just take the weight of Everything off ur shoulders n leave u feeling full n happy!! #bless old ladies fr!! literally my favorite people to interact with always i love u abuelas everywhere u r everything to me and i would do #anything for u !!!! i miss getting to help friends grandmas w stuff as a kid 🥺 it was just always great 2 talk 2 them and be close n on #good terms n stuff :3 i was the same way with their moms hehe. hi hello i want 2 help !! (⁠✿ ‚‚⌒‿⌒‚‚) #my friend is being lame and acting embarrassed but i love you please talk to me i am so so interested and think you're really #cool and funny and sweet and wise actually ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა ♡⁠ i wanna be around u if u wanna hang out #even if it's as simple as getting 2 help in the kitchen n always helping w dishes n stuff ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა aaa ♡⁠ #omg i was late 2 the thing too and missed the breakfast and there's this sweet energetic old lady who's always like #omg u didn't get to eat? do u want this? can i get you some coffee or tea? and I'm always just like no no it's okay I'm gonna get it but #appreciate the offer and just ૮ – ﻌ–ა she is always looking out 4 me !! but she's just a sweetie like that !! #i think sharing food is a universally good way 2 make friends and it always warms my heart 2 meet ppl who r the same (❁´◡`❁) #they r always so so sweet 😭🥰 for my astrology girlies i correctly guessed that she's a taurus hehe 😼 #there's another old lady who's an office manager for one of the offices n she is so soft spoken n sweet and i wish i got 2 hug her n talk #to her more 🥺 she's so far though omg i don't get to see her in person much #n e ways i work w some really warm bubbly ppl ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა i am a happy girlie 2day!! then im going Serious Mode again tmrw 🫡 #oo i get to setup like an Actual server for a rack w linux and it's being delivered 2 my place tomorrow 0: I'm excited abt it as a project #AND my new jewelry came in today along w some cute underwear we r starting this wk off strong !!! #there was so so much more frm 2day i am just rly stoned n thinking abt it all (⁠〒⁠﹏⁠〒⁠) #if u actually read all of my ramble ily ty for letting me Talk ૮˶• ﻌ •˶ა ♡⁠

[fondocampo]

on this topic, i suddenly remembered this gay person i knew some time ago who was like "why do you always assume men you like are straight you're acting exactly like straight people" and i saw their point but the thing is when a cishet person assumes everyone's straight it's bc of heteronormativity, when i assume men i'm interested in are straight i'm protecting myself from inevitable heartbreak and potentially dangerous situations by telling myself it's impossible anyway and to get over it <3

#hope that helps #like i DO think there's a possibility he's not in fact straight #but if i go down that path i'll start having silly dangerous thoughts. no thanks #like he's probably not homophobic bc i'm like kinda obviously not straight and he's very friendly and nice to me but #there's an ocean between being okay with me being gay and being okay with me being interested in him #like hello we all know cishet men right. right we all know how a lot of them are #i kinda feel insane sometimes when even gay ppl seem to miss these things like helloooooo #don't we all live in this cishet men dominated world as lgbt+ people.... don't we all realize it's always potentially dangerous to like #cishet men as a lgbt+ person ???? like literally any flavor of lgbt+ and you're in danger. POTENTIALLY yes but. HELLOOOOOOO #nico rambles #obviously there ARE good chances that this man even if cishet would just shrug and be like i don't like you like that but it's chill #and it changes nothing in our relationship (beside me being a bit awkward but i could get over that) #but he's my coworker so i'm not risking anything lmao

[dq1]

thinking again

#feel like i have become too complacent with watering myself down into an easily digestible identify for society #partially bc of my career is very conservative.. so #no piercings or tattoos. cut my long hair off to a mens hairstyle. i pass exclusively as a cis straight man as much as i can #especially around the old head bosses i meat #stopped learning japanese even though im mixed so i could learn French because its more useful where i live #i dont want to be useful and i dont want to be seen as some creature mimicking human anatomy like a robot i just want 2 be myself #but ive been doing this so long idk who myself would even be anymore #sometimes i get into old interests i had as a kid and i feel that spark like that 12 yr old didnt die on the inside but then its gone again #i wish a version of myself thats not palatable to my peers could exist #i want to relearn japanese and i want to ride motorcycles and i want to get into certain types of music or clothes #but it also feels like none of it really matters anymore at the same time #if i could be anything i would be a funeral director in nagoya but thats something that can never happen #i shove everything i like down so deep you have to reach to find it #this whole blog is an amalgamation of who i was and who i wished i could be #but being human we r just cursed with bodies that dont feel like our own and having to cut and shape them in a way #that u feel better but not enough so that the people around you are frightened #this is mostly the fact i have avoidant personality disorder and i know i can never be what normal is for most people #i want 2 be myself but myself died somewhere in a past life i think #i am not even human on the inside. half the time i joke w people that im an rpg slime or the human version of those sponge slimes #hence my nickname irl literally being gelo / jello / jelly #and if not that then black German shepherd dogs r also literally just me #but alas i am stuck in a human body #one thats too fat too hairy too sick too broken and i have to deal with it and rebuild myself everyday so people aren't uncomfortable #ANYWAY!!! maybe ill add onto this later ...idk. #to be born again.. sighs.

[dipyronegirl]

i have once again been discriminated against for my accent

#i’m kidding it’s not discrimination at all it’s just #i live in rio de janeiro right. and we have a very specific accent that’s different from all other states #we drag our sentences (so it sounds a bit lazy??) and we pronounce our S like an X #like. take the word ‘bolas’ (balls). we say bolash while literally every other state just says bolas like the S in the word ‘say’ #anyway. our accent makes us sound like players somehow; it’s hard to explain #and the carioca (means from rio) stereotype is that we always find shortcuts to everything; to get what we want without working for it #and it’s partially true tbh #but for some reason (i have no idea why) my accent specifically is very very strong (& i only found out ab it a few weeks ago) #and it makes me sound even more of a ‘player’. i asked ppl to be honest w me ab it and they said i sound like #a drug dealer or someone ‘shady’ that works w something illegal #and like i’m lazy and don’t care ab anything and maybe don’t take things seriously #and i mean all of it is true. kind of #but it’s shit that ppl can guess all my flaws just bc of my accent #sorry im rambling i’m so annoyed by this. i’d change if i could but idk how to speak differently fr #and ab my flaws. well i know i /can/ change them but idk how. i’m trying and i hope i become less lazy and more interested in serious thing #(cause yk. my biggest flaw is that i can’t bring myself to give a fuck ab the things i should care ab like responsibilities and shit) #god i’m rambling again im just so ughhh #text #giocore #about me #language

[ilynpilled]

when reading anything i say about this series i think u all should just keep in mind that i love jaime so much im gonna throw up so u can take my takes with a grain of salt with this fact in mind. ill admit this. wont change tho

#i have a bias when it comes to him #if he takes the wrong path in winds ill try to come to terms with his self inflicted doom but i will still place a curse on george #dont get it twisted #en garanboncias viharat allitom majd rad #i love many other characters some extremely so but i dont think anything really matches the level of engagement i have w his story #intellectually and emotionally so engaged with what he has going on it drives me crazy #love thinking about him love love #i have an ideal trajectory for him that will not be kind to him and will force him to confront everything #thats what i think would be the best for all his character writing #and if it doesnt happen i will be very sad bc i think everything that has been set up with him is about confrontation #and not going away inside anymore #and the weight of choices #and that is something i have interest in on a visceral level #i want his change to be real and grueling #and to not lead to anything particularly rewarding in the literal sense #i want his reward to be the chance to stomach himself #not glory not romance not anything else #i have been and always will be a he should live and take the black truther bc death would not be a satisfying conclusion #a heroic death is tied to his chivalric idealization/passive suicide ideation #he has never been afraid of death but he is afraid of confrontation and taking responsibility #it is also a cop out with stories that focus on ‘redemption’ #he needs to live with his past actions and consistently atone with his future ones #he is everything to me im sorry #this is also y i dont tend to agree w shippers they either want him to go out with cers #die for brienne #or marry her #i dread all of these things #its either cynical and stagnant or a cop out or its undeserved and unsatisfying #dying for the bad side or the good side thats so simple and unsatisfying #i need more

[padfootastic]

Remus is definitely the most woobified, sugar-coated marauder in fanon. He was so interesting in canon when he was portrayed as a character who was on the good side but with typical villain traits: charismatic manipulator, selfish, gaslighter, etc. His motivations were understandable too. What are your thoughts on him? How do you feel about him in fanon vs canon?

hello 💜 i absolutely agree with you! re remus: i have one super rambly answer here which i still fully stand by. also some more thoughts under a cut so remus fans can skip this one lol

honestly, fanon remus makes me so annoyed i don’t think i can even properly articulate it lol. it’s gotten so bad that people will completely forget how the man acted in the books and then have go and say ‘oh it was completely out of character for him to do x’ when like,,,,no? (i mean, if u don’t care about canon then great, just say that and we’re gucci) like i’ve literally seen people argue him trying to run out on his wife and unborn kid was ooc as if we didn’t get multiple examples of his cowardice (self admitted) and avoidance tactics. like, he was not a saint and he definitely was not a morally upstanding person. he often comes off so much more favourably compared to sirius and james when the man wasn’t any better. all his faults are whitewashed into ‘he was scared of losing the only friends he had’ which is such a shit excuse (even more than the ‘poor werewolf’ one). i once saw someone saying ‘how do you think remus would’ve reacted to harry’s illegal tournament entry’ as an aside to ‘how would sirius have reacted as a free man’ and i remember being completely baffled because…we know how he reacted? which is that he didn’t. the man didn’t even bother to send a letter to harry, didn’t show up before the task when everyone else’s families did, didn’t help him with any of the crises, wasn’t there post graveyard. like, there’s a theme here. remus has no interest in cultivating a relationship with harry (or if he does, he has a very shitty way of showing it). honestly, he’s kind of terrible at relationships in general imo.

i’ve mentioned this before, i think, but also the double standards with which he’s treated coupled with the complete lack of accountability is so frustrating. like, remus can mess up more than anyone else but it’ll never stick. for eg, you’ll have so many people saying sirius treated harry like a second coming of james (and i do blame the movies for that one) but remus’ repeated usage of james as a way to manipulate harry is completely ignored. like that scene in poa is actually cruel. sirius’ forced absence from harry’s life is thrown in his face, but remus is never once questioned. (it’s why him being called a second godfather is a pet peeve of mine tbh). he wasn’t a known werewolf until poa, what the fuck was he doing until then? that’s the thing right, there’s so many gaps in his storyline that u can fill it any way u want. fans will do it favourably, while people like me who don’t like him won’t.

there’s also the whole sirius aspect of it, for me. as far as fictional characters go, i think remus is terrible for sirius. like most people think the exact opposite, yeah? remus is out of sirius’ league, there’s a power dynamic that’s skewed in sirius’ favor, remus’ low self esteem, trust issues blah blah. but i genuinely believe it’ll be sirius who comes off worse in a r/s relationship. so ykno, that just adds to my bias lol.

editing to add: guess it’s the hallmark of a successful manipulative character, though, that he flies under the radar the way he does eh? like that’s the sign of success right there, that he can pull all the shit in the world without it sticking to him so good on him lol

#remus lupin critical #like that man literally tells a 13yo harry that he’s gambling his parents sacrifice away. fuck man. that’s heartless #and it’s not like he did anything to make harry understand why he must be careful. didn’t have one meaningful convo with him did he? #but feels the need to pass judgements like these #i’m sorry if u were expecting a more neutral/balanced answer lol #my dislike for him has exponentially increased in the past few months #i can accept he’s an interesting character bc of how utterly grey he is. but that doesn’t mean i rly like him lol #i think i could’ve? if the remus fandom wasn’t the way it was #clearly they like the fanon version of him better but i just can’t get behind it tbh #it’s just annoying how he’s constantly treated with baby gloves s’all #also!! the fanon view makes it so that the ooc tag is *never* used #so even if u want to escape it u can’t #like i’m sure someone would be like ‘well pen if u don’t like remus just stop reading & bitching?’ #but that’s not possible when he’s *everywhere* and u can’t even filter it out lol #and i’m constantly living in the hope that it won’t be that way in a fic #which does happen ngl. just very rarely #pen’s asks

[heartyearning]

one of the funniest things when you start studying theatre design (at our school anyway) is that u come in and for your first few scenography designs youre like im gonna use screens ,,,,, —and projection.... this is how i’m going to enhance the impact of my performance 🤯🧠💯 & then you go to theatre productions in which they use screens and projection & ur like All My Teachers Were Right This Sucks Severe Ass

#^so says guy who crucially is using screens in his concept rn #but its different bc the screen itself is the medium as opposed to enhancing theatre cause like the thing is #and this sounds fucking pretentious until you actually pay attn to it #but the thing is that when ur trying to balance screen/projection with live action ur projection is going to eat shit absolutely every time #nothing beats the tension of live theatre & if youre attempting to mix it too often it'll end up in comparison #(this is if you use the projection cut n dry i once saw a performance where the projection was done really well actually #but it wasnt so much a balance btwn the two things as it was like. certain scenes were a video the performer just danced along to #and it was more so about his individual experience vs the experience others have that he cant articulate on his own #it was rly fucking good it was called the history of the korean western theatre it was stellar) #but also like the thing i just left was an opera that used screens practically instead of doing anything on the stage #which is SO bewildering to me #there were a few more things wrong with it but the biggest thing to me was like #in these videos they were showing (during the performance of the scenes) it was basically the scene that was playing #except with an attempt at a real costume and somewhat more of an effort when it comes to proxemics #whereas on stage itself it was black clothes (not even interesting shapes) and people talking At each other #which not only does this become a really boring back drop for an even more boring live action part (which is nevertheless still more #compelling than the video) they were also speaking the lines in the videos just with the sound removed #so often it felt like you were watching out of sync videos #and also like even the costumes in the videos were boring as hell bc it was just patterns printed on top of fabric #which can work at times but not like this it was all so .... 2 dimensional but like quite literally #its not even that bad to be honest like ive seen far worse things its just a lot more egregious cause its unreal expensive and also doesnt #even seem to try #(+ im quite sure the director of this opera is my theatre history professor's dad & i am yelling & screaming imagining the family dinners) #(like all the actors were also white & it was the story of the indian queen which is abt mexico & peruvian incas & my prof is like. so #hyper socially aware this wouldnt ever ever ever fly with her #plus she's really creative & we saw a play by her last semester and its night & fucking day love)

[iloveyoumorethansoup]

Ok college review now that I’m almost a month in. I’ve gained nothing from this experience but a janky apartment that I love

#no literally like. I’m not a people person. so that aspect of college doesn’t appeal to me #and also I’m in 4 classes. my library science one I was excited for is entirely geared towards being a school librarian and teaching #so I’m out here making lesson plans. which I have negative interest in being a teacher #my business class is structured in a way that makes lectures useless but I’m required to go #my theatre class. we haven’t really started anything so my opinion is neutral but tainted by last years experience. 2.5 out of 10 #my programming class is fun though. I’ll be the one programming sketchy apps now #i do really love my apartment #but yeah. i don’t often leave it. and god people love to knock at my door and windows #i don’t like. wanna shut myself in and not speak to anyone ever. but I’m not saying I’d hate that either #bc ok. last year I talked to two people. one of which didn’t come back this year and the other one who chronically cancels plans #but also just in general. confuses me?? like bestie will do something and I’m just like. why #oh but there’s 2 guys who live above me I know. one of which was the one banging on my window at 1am wasted #the other guy is nice but also talking to him tends to tire me out bc he’s the type of person who has to be right #not in like an argumentative way. moreso the type to repeat himself and rephrase things until ur like fine fine ok #also a tiny bit of a show off/one upper type #but I do have my friend who lives a good 45 mins away we see each other often and it’s fun #so yeah that’s my academic stuff and my social circle summary! #also. my ex best friend? lived 45 mins away. same city. saw her like 2-3 times the whole year. she could have done so much better #but yeah. i don’t do much in college and am 97% certain I’m taking a gap year to go hang out at my summer job #soup talks

[youraveragecatastrophe]

Various reflexions regarding Julia's home

So I was thinking about Julia Argent, as one does, when I suddenly realized that while I had always assumed she lived in Poitiers, France, maybe that wasn't actually the case. So I'm compiling my thoughts on this post, and if anyone has things to add, please feel free!

I first assumed both Devineaux and Julia lived around/in Poitiers because, in the very first episode, Devineaux describes Poitiers as being his "jurisdisction".

In season 1 episode 9, Dr. Bellum describes him as having been "transferred from his department in Poitiers, France". When he is kidnapped by VILE later in the episode, he is brought to Cleo's residence in Poitiers, which again comforts me in my idea he lives in the area (I doubt the cleaners would take a long trip with a passed out Devineaux).

Regarding Julia specifically, she is at home in the middle of the night when Chief wakes her up, tells her that Devineaux has been kidnapped and that she called the police. Julia gets fully dressed and arrives on site around the same time as the police. She must live close to the VILE residence, also in Poitiers.

In conclusion, at least until the end of season 1, Julia, like Devineaux, lives in Poitiers, France.

#carmen sandiego 2019 #julia argent #if you have information outside of the show especially i'm interested bc i don't have any of the books #and didn't really follow anything the show's crew might have said #i'm thinking maybe i'll add to this post if there are other things that pop up in later episodes #we see the outisde of julia's building in to steal or not to steal but that could literally be anywhere #she certainly lives in the UK in season 4 since she teaches there #i'm wondering about season 2 especially. julia starts working more 'officially' for acme (e.g. getting her suit) #does she stay in poitiers or relocate somewhere else that would be closer to acme's hq or something? #i'm waiting to have rewatched all of s2. to have everything fresh in my mind #(this is for fanfic-y purposes. in case you where wondering)