#autistic social skills

[autball]

Just like last time, if you look at this and think, “But that would be messed up!” - you’re about halfway to the point. Do keep going.

Also, if you’re thinking, “But I’m autistic and I actually wouldn’t like <that social skill> either!” - well yes, of course. One-size-fits-all approaches have the potential to harm anyone, even those in the supposed “in group,” which is why they should be avoided no matter who we’re talking about. But also also...it's a cartoon. It's okay to just laugh, too. 😉 (Image description in Alt Text.)

#autistic #actually autistic #autism #autistic funny #autistic feels #social skills #autistic social skills #autism acceptance

[snakeautistic]

One of the reasons I believed I couldn’t be autistic for so long was due to a fundamental misunderstanding of my social struggles. This being that I am not by any means incapable of memorizing social rules. Through observation and direction I can construct a broad framework of ‘socially acceptable or not.’ For example, I’m well aware that making physical contact with someone without consent isn’t acceptable. Or that stating blunt facts in a way that implicates someone negatively isn’t allowed. I know to avoid interrupting others if they’re already talking, to not walk away when I’m in the middle of a conversation. Crying, being unusually quiet and frowning indicates sadness. Someone smiling at laughing at what you’re saying means they probably are enjoying their time with you. An increase in speaking volume indicates excitement- either positive or negative. Sarcasm is often indicated by someone saying something absurd that you know they would never say, or you know to be factually wrong.

The fact that I had learned these broad rules made me think autism wasn’t a possibility for me. But being autistic doesn’t stop you from obtaining and applying information. (I mean that’s why so many interventions that ‘treat’ autism do result in the autistic person being able to pass as neurotypical.)

The difference comes from lacking the subconscious nuances and exceptions that come with those broader rules. For example- when is it okay to actually be honest? Some people will not be bothered by physical intimacy- but how would I know this? How can you tell if a group wants you to join in with their conversation? How to tell if this person is smiling and laughing politely or genuinely? How to tell if someone who you know very little about is being sarcastic?

There are not direct, easy to apply ‘rules’ for this, and yet clearly there are ‘right’ options. When the appropriate reaction must be determined by subtle body language or small shifts in tone of voice, ones that are near impossible to teach- I become completely lost.

That’s something I always find lacking with the general social skills advice given. It’s helpful to a point, but the truth is everyone is an individual. People express themselves differently, and react to your same actions differently due to past circumstances or temperaments. There is no one set of rules you can use for everyone, unfortunately. The majority of neurotypicals, while of course having miscommunications and the like, can rely on their subconscious to parse out any subtle changes they might need to make to their demeanor for a particular situation. My brain is much less adept at focusing down broader experience/rules into unique circumstances. (This is actually something that extends past social cues for me and I might make another post talking about it because I think it’s interesting)

Anyway rant over but yeah this was a huge mental barrier to seeking out a diagnosis for a while because at some level I ( ironically enough) took struggling to understand social cues too literally…

#actually autistic #autism #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #autistic #autistic things #autistic traits #autistic thoughts #low support needs #LSN autistic #social cues #socializing #social skills #asd #neurodivergence #autistic experiences #autism spectrum

[icryalotandiamnotproductive]

God made me this way because he knew I'd be too powerful if I had social skills

#social skills #social anxiety #shy #introverted #infp #autism #autistic #social cues #charisma #audh #actually neurodivergent

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Myth vs Reality

I really don’t like the stereotype that autistic people are super smart but their social skills are nonexistent. Not all of us are geniuses. Some of us are just normal, regular people.

I wish writers, directors, and others could understand that.

Spectrum Sloth

#autism #actually autistic #myth vs reality #I don’t like how they make autistic people savants that have no social skills #not all of us are geniuses #some of us are just regular people #I wish others could understand that #neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actually neurodivergent #feel free to share/reblog #Spectrum Sloth (Facebook)

[adhdxxsdiary]

#autism spectrum #autistic life #actually autistic #neurotypical #neurodiverse stuff #neurodivergent #autism #ASD #being autistic #socially awkward #social skills #autistic experiences #autistic feels #autistic culture

[themaskedlady]

#autisticcommunity #actuallyautistic #actually autism #autism #asd #neurodiversity #neurodivergent #autistic life #autistic females #autistic world #autism spectrum #social skills #socially awkward #small talk #infodumping #its the neurodiversity #autistic pride #autism acceptance #autistic problems #autismmeme #autismcommunity #autism community #actually autistic

[vivianseda]

Thank you Em NeuroWild

“I drew this ages ago and then forgot about it.

Many Autistic people are not lacking in social skills. Get a bunch of neurodivergent friends together and watch the magic happen.

Many of us are not lacking in humour or sarcasm. The funniest people I know are neurodivergent. Our humour may be different to yours.

Many of us have so much empathy that the feelings try to crush us. We might express that empathy differently to you.

We communicate. Our communication style is probably different to yours.

It’s not that we don’t have these skills.

It’s that we do them differently. They look different.

And they’re often unrecognisable to neurotypical folk.

As Chloe Hayden says, ‘different, not less’.

Em ☺️🌈✌️

AuDHD SLP”

#asd #autism #autistic #tea #autismo #autista #audhd #audhder community #audhder #neurodivergent community #neurodivergent #educate #neurodiversity #social skills #neurodivergente #comunidad neurodivergente #neurodiversidad

[nando161mando]

#actually autistic #autistic things #autistic adult #autism #autistic artist #autistic community #autistic experiences #social skills #everyone #ableism #ableist language cw #tw ableist language #ableist bullshit #fuck ableists #cringe culture is ableist #ausgov #politas #auspol #tasgov #taspol #australia #fuck neoliberals #neoliberal capitalism #anthony albanese #albanese government #class war #double standards #double standard much? #social networks #social media

[mueritos]

its my bday today so heres a new meet the artist :3

#muertodraws #finished my first day of grad school #i would have enjoyed it more if this fuck ass heat wave wasnt happening #but it wasnt too bad im excited to get to workin #also this mta is the first one where i felt like i didnt have to try hard #im allowing myself to exist as i am #and it feels nice #that includes the questioning of autism #aka i am probably autistic #i just struggle with gaslighting myself #but im learnig that autistic coping skills really work for me #like stimming and paying attention to my sensory and social needs #so that has been interesting #anyway #i am super tired but kind of hopeful :) #so thats nice #trans artist #queer artist #meet the artist

[yet-another-autism-blog]

One unwritten social rule I've noticed is that you're supposed to just let people make fun of you?

Like, if people regularly make fun of you for a certain trait and you get upset about it or ask them to stop, you're too sensitive and ruining the joke or whatever. But if you make the joke before someone else does, then you're annoying or obnoxious.

So I guess you're just supposed to let other people make fun of you? People who are casual acquaintances at best?

Like, if the joke was really funny, it'd be funny when I said it too. And if it's annoying when I say it, how do you think I feel hearing it all the time?

#actuallyautistic #actually autistic #autism #autistic #autism spectrum disorder #social skills

[musicalsobachka]

Me holding onto dimension 20 npcs I’ve deemed as autistic and therefore will defend and guard with my dying breath despite any shortcomings

Rapunzel neverafter 🤝 Mary ann fhjy

#fantasy high #d20 fhjy #fhjy #fantasy high junior year #neverafter #dimension 20 #d20 neverafter #still a rapunzel ride or die girlie maybe Timothy DID deserve it he insulted her social skills and ruined her baking!!! #she’s autistic!! #me looking at the intrepid heroes like #dont disrespect Mary ann the way you disrespected rapunzel im watching you

[aknolan]

Having just watched the underground job, I gotta talk about how Leverage does something very huge with Parker being written as autistic that I don't remember having seen in any show before.

After she successfully grifts for the job, she goes and takes a nap.

And this hits on something that I really don't see coming up with autistic characters ever. That being, Parker can do all of the social stuff (granted, she had some help), it's just really tiring for her.

This fits right in with what I'd noticed already, how Parker is always just about as convincing as she needs to be for the job. Being more convincing than that? It would just tire her out, and she doesn't feel like dealing with that.

Whenever I see autistic characters, it's with this very black and white (a bit ironic) view of their social skills. They're bad at it, others are good at it, and that's it.

And Parker breaks that. She's not bad at it, she just gets tired from doing it and most of the time it's not worth the effort.

Parker does just fine as a grifter, and afterwards she has to take a nap. That's the best writing I've seen for an autistic character.

#leverage #parker leverage #parker #I'm aware some autistic ppl really cannot do the sort of social stuff parker is doing in the episode #my point remains though that how much social skills autistic ppl have is often not really a simple thing #and is often really dependent on tiredness and willingness to be tired

[the-overthinktank]

I feel like part of autistic infighting is that the term encompasses such a huge range of disability, symptoms, and experiences that advocacy often struggles to be inclusive without becoming so unspecific it's toothless. On one hand high vs low functioning is a false dichotomy, on the other hand someone who was has severe difficulty communicating and motor disabilities has obviously had very different experiences from someone who found out later in life and can mask

#the special ed vs burnt out gifted kid fighting especially.... #feels weird because i was diagnosed early and was in some... idk... special ed lite classes during elementary school? #and my experience was mostly positive there. in retrospect they were probably trying to teach me social skills #but i was in kindergarten so i mostly remember being taken to a room that had a box full of sequins and animal erasers for me to sort #regular classroom was much worse #i was a social outcast for most of elementary and middle school and was bullied heavily #but many other autistic peoples' experience with special ed is like. physical abuse and dehumanization by faculty. #which is not remotely equivalent to baby jay eraser room #no reblogs because i don't want to argue with randos today

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Early Signs of Autism: What to Look For

The Autistic Teacher

Note:

I know this talks about infants and younger children, and I know I have a majority of older followers. But I thought this could be useful for those who have kids or are thinking about having kids.

#autism #actually autistic #early signs of autism #what to look for #communication #social interaction #reputation #special interest #sensory sensitivity #follows/likes routine #motor skills and coordination #feel free to share/reblog #neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actually neurodivergent #The Autistic Teacher (Facebook)

[duaghterofstories]

You know, as someone who is autistic, I will never understand the hatred of small talk.

Like, a lot of the autistics I've seen complain about there not being a script for social interactions and they never know how to respond, but there is one.

Are you at a party standing next to someone and it's awkward? Simple. Small talk.

No you don't respond to 'How are you?' with a breakdown of your medical history. You say 'Fine, and you?'. You discuss the weather, because you both know what the weather is. You ask how they know the host and nod politley as they explain.

Boom, awkwardness gone.

You cannot complain about there not being a social script and complain about the one that is still there.

#autism #actually autistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #autistic #actually neurodivergent #growing up autistic #small talk #social skills

[themaskedlady]

#actually autism #actuallyautistic #autism community #neurodiversity #autism #the autistic strategy #autistic socializing #autism social skills #autism world #autistic as fuck #autistic adults #late diagnosed #autistic life #autistic problems #autistic friendships #autistic boundaries #autistic masking #autistic loss of all your friends #autistic lone wolf #autistic lonesome #autistic weirdo #autistic pride #autism pride #autism acceptance #autisticmemes #autism memes #autistic memes #neurodivergent memes