#anyway i have cleaned it up and im hopefully gonna sleep for a couple more hours | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

roboromantic · 2 years

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these past few days have been So Much. Not in a bad way or anything but im just Exhausted

I finally got more or less settled into the sweets position but then to give me more hours (which I absolutely do not mind) I started learning the kneading stuff today (harder than it looked!) It's also 7-10 (for now? might be longer shifts once I'm used to the position, idk) instead of 4-10 so I mean that's fine, I'll take a couple more hours of sleep, but it kinda threw me off the groove that I'd barely gotten into

I've also had to get stuff ready for the consignment sale; I finally got everything priced and tagged and dropped off yesterday after work since it's very conveniently located on the way home. Tomorrow the sellers get to shop first and I was thinking I might need to go home, shower and change, and then drive all the way back out there to shop, but turns out it's not nearly as messy as making the sweets so I should be fine to drop by on my way home. I'm not really gonna be there all that long anyway — probably just gonna check out the Transformers and leave. Maybe shelving? idk they have a LOT of shit

and THEN my dad proposed to his girlfriend and the tentative date for the wedding is the day before my birthday which I mean. I don't super care about that overlap but it's just. basically that's the deadline for my brother and I to Get Out. and I mean, my brother has a decent amount in savings and now that I'm working I can save up for a bit but neither of us want to deal with renting an apartment but I ain't making enough to be even be able to afford a 2 bedroom apartment, so he's gonna have to find a job and/or I'm gonna have to find a second job (and IWouldPreferNotTo.jpg) and I'm Very stressed about this

and I mean my dad's been very generous by allowing us to live here rent-free for this long! I can't exactly complain about him wanting us to leave but. more time to save up and look around woulda been Great. like I've never rented an apartment so I'm not 100% sure on the timeframe for that but doesn't it generally take at least a couple months to find a place and get through all the red tape n shit

also my dad like just helped his fiancée move so. I think the plan is to sell this place and he's gonna move in with her? I'd have to ask him about that. idk. I'm very happy for him but also having to find housing at such short notice with next to no money is WILDLY stressful and I mean. I kinda wanted to have SOME disposable income

anyway. The kneading job isn't that difficult and I've only got the one other 3-hour shift tomorrow before I'm done for the week. The hard part of the consignment sale is done, all I gotta do is actually shop tomorrow. So I've got a long weekend to finally hopefully finish cleaning out my room; once I'm done with that and listing stuff on ebay I should be good to relax for a while and hopefully be able to hang out on Discord again

and like. I enjoy gaming and I'll have fun doing it, but it is still kind of a little stressful to have my relaxing activity be disrupted by worrying about getting everything I want from a video game's season before it ends :/ . I should have plenty of time to finish the stuff I wanna do for Destiny and Fall Guys but the latter is kind of a pain to grind. I really want the Mecha Godzilla costume and in-game currency to buy the next battlepass for free though so. At least that one I can do while lying in bed listening to a podcast

and like there's SO MUCH I wanna do and I was kinda hoping that having a job would alleviate some stress so I could work on those — and I mean, it's definitely reduced it — but I think until my brother has a source of income or I suddenly get a bunch of money/a free house somehow I'm still gonna be stressed

#I was planning on writing a shorter thing that was basically just ''it's been hectic recently but it's winding down so I can relax soon''#but I realized halfway through that I'm not actually sure I CAN relax 😬 help

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startwithbrooklyn · 3 years

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THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / SEPTEMBER 7, 2019 // the possession/the garden party

guess whos back and better than ever! those sausage wraps aint gonna be the only thing you see twice! its ya girl b! lets go!

i gave it a couple days off because i wanted eps 6 & 7 to line up with their real days but no one cares and neither do i anyway

-the darkest places 👌🏻

-rawley trying to keep nance out of the police station is such a struggle lmfaoooo i wanna see more teen nancy being annoying and solving shit tbh

-love the "idk wtf is going on, we need to text nancy" vibe that bess and ace have collectively decided on

-loving this side part on nance tbh

-"i think we all need to calm down" aaaaaand thats the last time nick tries to be the voice of reason lmfaooooo

-TED 🥺🥺🥺😭💙💙

-george looking at bess to see if shes going to be shamed for admitting the affair

-"no judgment" 🥺💙

-i fucking LOVE liza lapira btw

-"how is that insensitive?" oh girl. that social shit.

-yaaaaaaang. 🙏🏻

-"shes saving up for BTS!!" 💙

-"only moderately" lmfaooo i've said that before

-"keep staring at me like that, you'll have to buy me dinner" i suddenly understand nancy/george shippers

-sis is full on hallucinating at this garden party. wonder what other people/karen must've seen instead

-this purple suit on karen gives me life 💜💜

-"lucy's why i became a cop" did carson know why karen became a cop? then had to hide why she did when she started sleeping with him? was karen drawn to kate bc she knew lucy and was looking for clues? (also peep that age difference if kate was lucy's counselor, lucy and karen are the same age and kate and carson are the same👀)

-"i used to summer here" so where do they live normally? and hudsons too. new york maybe? but the marvins live here? or only some leave?

-owen says "your father told me about your track record" thats interesting given marvins v hudsons tend to pop off on sight. and why on earth would owen believe everett?

-god i fucking love lisbeth

-and i LOVE that tiffany is that bitch enough to have to change dresses

-DAMN ace leaping across that table

-lmaoooo my 3 girls bonding 💙 "okay drew" lmfaoooo

-UNPOPULAR OPINION: im actually that rare hoe that loves owen lmfaooo send me alllll the hate

-"pine hill" / "ryans getting desperate. invited rival to dinner for 5 - pine hill wont be happy to see me there" <-- but owen never showed. according to ep 14 ryan made those plans "before he knew tiffany was going to come" so tiffany invited herself to a meeting w owen on purpose -stayed out by the car on purpose to catch him in the parking lot? or was that a red herring? why was tiffany investigating him? and why didnt owen show? because of how ryan gambled his money away? (and what exactly was he trying to do that left him owing money?) wouldnt the marvins and tiffany be on the same side to take the hudsons down?

and lastly

so did she fix her laptop from the cracks last ep? or were they just not real?

season 2 barely touched on the flashdrive and tiffany so hopefully s3 will clean up (what if tiffany was part of the road back or whatever lmfaooooooo)

#brooklyn's ND primer #nancy drew cw #the Great Rewatch of 2021 #you best start believing in ghost stories miss drew - you're in one

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lovely-teeztaetae · 4 years

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I was wondering if I could request a boy next door with Tae from BTS? Thanks

Requested by lovely anon~

Enjoy!

♡ Flower Pot ♡

~ fluffffy ~

“Wang.”

“Waaaang.” I desperately called a second time. I stood up from my crouched position next to my car.

“Come on, why can’t you be good like Tofu, just because I open the door it doesn’t give you an excuse to run away!” I spoke again.

I had opened the door to check the mail, expecting a package from one of my favourite sites, and so me being excited, I bolted out of the door not minding to close it all the way.

And while I carelessly left the door opened, one of my cats bolted out of the door as well.

I was still hopelessly looking around in the front yard when I heard a small jingle.

“Wang?” My head perked up as I turned to the direction the noise came from.

Soon after there was a quiet meow, which confirmed that it was indeed a cat, and hopefully mine at that.

I stood up and slowly made my way down my driveway, peeking under my car one last time. I then reached my neighbours lawn when I suddenly spotted Wang’s glowing eyes.

Wang was sitting comfortably in one of the flower pots in my new neighbours yard.

I mentally groaned, and slowly began to walk up to him.

“Come on.” I encouraged him. He peeked his head up at my slow actions, slowly rising from the pot.

Wang soon got distracted by a dragonfly passing, and I took this as an opportunity to reach out for him and grab him, knowing that he was too tame to scratch.

As I sprang to grab him, he suddenly jumped out of the pot towards the dragonfly, and I landed on my knees, now surrounded by an array of broken colorful glass, and a pile of soil.

I looked down with wide eyes, seeing as the beautiful flower was now laying in a pile of soil, and I got even more anxiety when the front door flew opened.

“Are you okay?” I looked up and was in awe. The tan boy im front of me was beyond beautiful, and the concern in his eyes caused my heart to flutter.

“I- I’m-“ I stuttered.

“Here, I’ll get you cleaned up.” He opened the door further, coming over to me.

I furrowed my brows at his statement.

“I’m sorry?”

“Your knees, they’re scrapped.” He said, causing me to look down at my bright red knees. I furrowed my brows, confused as to why I hadn’t felt it up until he brought attention to it.

He reached his hand down for me to take. I began to get nervous at how kind he was being, and quickly wiped the forming sweat from my hands, taking his hand in mine.

“So, why were you in my garden?” He finally asked after moments of silence.

“Not that I’m mad, I was just, wondering.” He said, still concentrating on my leg.

Why wouldn’t he be mad, I mean, from his perspective it probably looked like I was being creepy and snooping around.

“Well um, my cat was sitting in your pot, and when I tried to get him, the pot tipped over and I tripped on it.” I said quietly.

“And I am so so sorry, I’ll buy you-”

“No no, it’s fine, trust me. I’m not that upset, I mean, it was just a cheap thing to hold my flower in, I would have replaced it with a better one soon anyway.” He said, looking up at me with a smile. He must have noticed how in awe I was at his actions as a blush began to grow on his cheeks.

“Thank you so much for helping me-”

“Taehyung.” He answered, placing the bandaid on and sitting himself up.

“And it was no problem at all-” he raised a brow, which hinted at me to tell my name as well.

“ Y/n.” I said sheepishly.

“Y/n.” He said again, looking into my eyes.

“And, you’re now officially the first person I know I’m this neighbourhood so, in a not weird way, thank you for giving me a reason to come outside.” He said with a laugh.

I laughed along with him, hopping off of the seat and immediately feeling the pain of my fresh wounds.

He noticed and grabbed my side, helping to support me.

“Are you okay?” He asked concerned. I laughed at how worried he was and straightened myself out.

“Yea, I’m fine, it’s just the blood rushing back.” I said beginning to walk out of the bathroom at down the hall, him sticking close by my side.

“Well, if you’re injury is too bad, you can sit here with me until you’re strong enough to walk.” He said half jokingly. I chuckled at how serious he was making the situation.

“Taehyung, it isn’t that bad.” I said looking over at him, still glued to my side.

I then looked over at the t.v. after hearing a familiar voice, an it was playingone of my favorite series and I was immediately intrigued.

“But, I guess I could stay and watch a couple episodes with you.” I smiled childishly, motioning towards the show playing. He chuckled at me as we both began to walk over to the coach, but then I suddenly remembered how I got my injury in the first place.

“Wang.” I said with wide eyes.

“What?” Taehyung asked with a small pout.

“My cat, he’s the reason I fell.” I said quickly going over to the door and opening it.

“Is that him?” I looked over to where he was looking and sure enough saw Wang sitting on top of the car sleeping.

I put my hand over my heart and was finally able to relax, knowing he was at least safe.

“Yea, hang on and let me get him in the house, I’ll be right back over.” I said with a reassuring smile, quickly making my way back to my lawn and carefully grabbing the sleeping cat.

I opened my still unlocked door and cursed at myself for being careless again.

“You know Wang, I’m not even mad at you for making me fall.” I said, setting him down in his bed.

“But just don’t do it again.” I playfully scolded him while I stroked his soft fur.

After Wang began to simmer back down in his bed, I washed my hands and grabbed a couole half eaten bags of chips in the pantry for Taehyung’s house.

“Hopefully this’ll do.” I stated to myself. I said goodbye to both of my cats and went back to Taehyung’s house, remembering to lock the door this time.

“Hey, um, sorry this is all I really had.” I held up the two bags of chips and he gave me a precious boxy smile.

“Don’t even worry, just your presence would be enough.” He said, closing the door behind me.

Again my heart fluttered at his words, and I made my way to the coach, carefully sitting down and opening one of the bags of chips.

“So, what season are you on?” I asked him while chowing down on a chip.

“Well actually, I just started.” He replied sheepishly.

I widened my eyes.

“The tonight’s gonna be a long night!” I said excitedly. He concentrated on me and let out an adorable giggle.

He restarted the episode and got cuddles up on the coach, and although I was supposed to be watching the series, I couldn’t help but get in a daze at how perfect he looked.

“The t.v.’s in front of you.” He teased, giving me a small wink along with a smile.

I immediately looked forward and slid down the coach.

Tonight’s gonna be a long, yet exciting, night.

- Flower Pot

Everyone, I am so so sorry it has taken me so long to answer my requests. I have many ideas jotted down, and have been going through some things with my work. Classes have just started back up and I’ve been trying to figure everything out. But I PROMISE I have not forgotten about any of my lovely readers or their lovely requests. I look back at them everyday and my heart is heavy at the thought of you all not getting your requests answered sooner. 🥺 Again I am really really sorry, and I am going to try my best to get the rest up very soon!

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ranger-lcat · 5 years

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Cold Qrow

For @fairy-anon-godmother , who put this idea into the universe.

Qrow catches a cold when they first get to Atlas. Cause it’s cold and he is not dressed for the weather.

Edit - I wrote another part Edit - I wrote a third part

—

“I meant it when I said it was good to see you.”

“Uh… yeah… you too.” Qrow mumbles rubbing his neck.

Ironwood closed the few steps and pulled him into a hug. It took Qrow a moment for his brain to catch up and he rolled his eyes as he returned the gesture. The warmth and familiarity was welcome, even if the metal was extra hard. They pull away and stand there awkwardly for a moment. Qrow glanced over to where the kids had been prior. It appeared that they had wandered off, lead by the plucky red-head that had saved them earlier. Qrow could still hear her voice echoing down the hall.

“Is there a place for me to sleep tonight?”

“There is room in my quarters.” James offered.

“Lead the way.” Qrow waves his hand, gesturing for Ironwood to proceed.

They walk in silence, footsteps against the tiled floor unnaturally loud. The halls were probably less echoey when there were students. Ironwood’s personal quarters were at the top of one of the secondary towers. So there was another awkward elevator ride up.

*Achoo* Qrow sniffs.

“Bless you.” James, ever polite and proper.

“Someone must be talking about me.” He jokes. *Achoo* “Ugh, I bet it’s Winter…” he rubs his nose, trying to get rid of the itch that seemed to settle in it.

The elevator dinged as they arrived at the top. The apartment was clean, but gave off the feeling that it was more for show than anything. Qrow doubted James spent much time up here. Ironwood walked in first and went straight for the hall closet to pull a set of blankets out.

“Just let me set up the guest room for you.” He says entering one of the other rooms.

“Wait… set up?” He followed Ironwood into the room. There was a bare mattress and boxes filling the floor. It would take some time to have it up to ‘Atlas Standards’. “Woah. Woah. It’s too late to have to set up a room. I’ll be fine on the couch.”

“Are you sure?”

“Jimmy, I’ve slept on way worse during some of my missions. Just give me a blanket.” Ironwood extracted one of the sheets from his pile, leaving the rest on the bed for the next day.

“Let me at least find you something more comfortable to sleep in.” Ironwood offers, slipping past Qrow and into his own bedroom.

“Is anything you have gonna fit me?” Qrow leans into the doorframe.

“I’m sure something will work.” He walks over and hands Qrow a set of folded clothes. “Try these. Bathrooms to the right.”

Qrow nodded and took the clothes. The bathroom was clean, but at least it felt lived in. He peeled his gear off, shivering as his skin is exposed to the cold air, and tossing everything onto the hamper James had in the corner. He probably could due with a shower… tomorrow. Instead he put the clothes James had lent him on. Sweatpants and a t-shirt with Atlas Academy printed in them.

Qrow rolled his eyes, as much as he didn’t want to look like one of the students, his gear wasn’t comfortable to sleep in. He cinched the pants so they would stay up and debated just leaving it at that, sleeping shirtless. Of course that would put all his scars on display… he puts the shirt on.

James is waiting in his doorway when Qrow leaves. His uniform jacket was off, leaving just the shirt and pants.

“Are you sure the couch will be ok, it’s more designed for looks than comfort.”

“Yes, it will be fine.”

—

It was not fine. The couch was soft enough, his body just refused to let him rest. It felt like a haze had fallen over him, rather than sleep.

Too early he heard a faint beeping that was stopped and replaced with the sounds of Ironwood getting up and moving.

No use trying to sleep more so Qrow sits up, rubbing his face to try and remove the exhaustion. And the fuzziness. He sniffs. He was congested… great…

It sounded like Ironwood was doing something in the kitchen. Hopefully coffee, before walking into the living room, Qrow can see he’s already dressed in his uniform.

“Good morning.” James greats him. “Did you sleep well.”

“Fine.” Gods did he really sound that bad.

“Do you feel ok?”

“I’m fine.” The congestion making that statement unbelievable.

“You don’t sound, or look fine. Let me get a medic.” He pulls out his scroll.

“No. No medic. It’s just a cold. I’m fine.” Qrow waves his hand around. The only thing worse than being sick was doctors. He didn’t need someone to come and tell him to rest and drink fluids. Especially if he planned to ignore them. “I just need some coffee.”

“I don’t think coffee is gonna fix this, you should rest today.”

“And let the kids loose in Atlas? That seems like a great idea.” Qrow forces himself to stand. His balance feels off but he’s determined to get past James and get himself coffee.

“I’m sure Penny and the Ace Ops have them covered.” James doesn’t move as Qrow tries to push him out of the way. “And I’m sure they’d tell you the same thing once they noticed.”

“It’s just a cold. I don’t need rest.” Qrow shoves harder, actually getting enough space to walk between Ironwood and the couch. The problem is a few steps away the world tilts.

He has to blink a few times to realize the only reason he didn’t fall is Ironwood’s arms. He’s still really dizzy.

“Perhaps you should rest in a bed.”

“You’re not setting up that room for me now.”

“Of course not, mine is free.”

James could have very easily carried Qrow. Qrow knows it. But it was a point of pride that he still tried to walk, even if clinging to James’s robotic arm was the only way to keep from falling. The bed had been made already, but James pulls the coverers down for him.

“Always the gentleman.” Qrow mutters as he gets in. Ironwood leaves and returns, placing a glass of water on the nightstand.

“Is there anything you need?”

Stay. “Im fine.”

“Very well, I’ll be back in an hour.”

“What?” Qrow pushes himself up to look at Ironwood, “Don’t you have important meetings?”

“I can do most of it from here, and since you refuse to see a medic—“

“It’s just a cold!”

“And I want to make sure it doesn’t get any worse.” Ironwood straightened his tie. “Now drink your water and get some sleep. There are a couple of things that I need to handle in person. I’ll be back soon.” He closes the door as he leaves.

Qrow flops back into the bed. He can see the water set on the nightstand and he is kinda thirsty. Rolling over he drinks half and sets it back, or tries too. It ends up tipping off and falling on the ground.

“Shit…” the glass isn’t broken, just the water soaking into the carpet. He debates for a second before deciding he’s too dizzy and justs leaves it. Instead he buries himself in the covers.

---

Qrow wakes up with violent sneeze and a sniff. He groaned as the aches in his body made themselves known. Something cool rests on his forehead. His eyes fly open.

James is resting his metal hand on Qrows forehead, his thumb rubbing circles against his temple. The cool was nice and the gentle touch eased some tension. The natural hand was holding up the scroll displaying official looking documents as James lounged on the bed.

Qrow grumbled as the scroll buzzed and another message appeared on the screen. That was gonna get annoying.

“Are you feeling better?” Ironwood set his scroll into his lap. It buzzed again.

“Busy as ever I see.” Qrow nuzzles into the cool of the metal palm. James smiles softly.

“I thought you felt warm, so I turned the cooling up.”

“Useful.”

“Yes. Are you hungry? I brought back some stew for you.”

“Stew for breakfast huh?”

“Most important meal. It needs to be filling.”

“I could eat.”

James nods and puts his scroll down, leaving to presumably go to the kitchen. The scroll buzzed a few more times, rattling on the nightstand. Qrow glares at it. It was tempting to just throw it out the window, but it was unlikely the windows opened this high up. Instead he tried to grab it so he could turn it off. It slipped out of his hand and flopped onto the carpet. At least now it didn’t rattle when it vibrated.

“And stay there.” He huffed at it.

“Please don’t argue with my scroll, I tend to get more messages when I do.” James returns with a tray.

“Oh, he does remember how to be funny.” Qrow teases. He shuffles to sit up and accept the tray into his lap.

“Unfortunately, I’m not kidding.” He picks the scroll up and reads through the new messages. Sighing heavily and typing a response back.

“So what is this exactly.” Qrow stirred the stew around. Looked like pasta and meat.

“Goulash. It’s popular with the students from Mantel.”

“Alright then,” he takes a few bites. It was surprisingly flavorful. “Mmm. Spicy.” Qrow sniffs. His congestion was clearing and he could breathe again.

He practically inhaled the bowl. The heat of the spices filling his stomach. He was sad when it was gone, but he was full anyway. Comfort and warmth pulsing through his body.

James took the tray away, replacing it with a glass of water. Qrow wishes he had been given that first, the liquid dulled the heat in his core. When that was gone the dishes were taken away and James returned to his relaxed position on the bed, still trying to keep pace with the incoming mail. He’d silenced the notifications at least.

Qrow curled as close to Ironwood as he dared. Apparently not close enough, as he was pulled flush to James’s side, head now resting on his chest. Gentle hair stroking made Qrow relax.

He felt warm and safe.

#rwby #rwby7 #cold qrow #ironqrow #qrow branwen #james ironwood #hurt/comfort #it’s just a cold #fluff #mine #writing

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iris-ymir · 4 years

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Guilty or Innocent - Iris

Asked someone to marry you?

“No. Not mi thin’. The whole... damn idea about marriage and shite? I dunno. Like... spending rest or yer life with the same person? Absolutely! Its just... Dont get mi wrong here! But the whole mess about marriage, and such.. It sounds so damn artificial. Do I wanna live with someone for the rest of mi years? Sure! But I dont need a fockin’ ring to prove it to anyone.. Then again.. If someone was to ask mi to marry her? Yeah, why not? If ya want a damn ring, lets get a damn ring!”

Kissed one of your friends?

“Shite... Well, yeah. About that... I have kissed many of mi friends actually.. And let mi tell ya. It always ends up into a fockin’ mess. One way or another! I... guess I should stop kissin’ mi friends..?”

Danced on a table in a bar / tavern? “You.. happen to know what Im doin’ for livin’? Yeah. Basically that.”

Ever told a lie?

“Just show me a fockin’ person who has not, and I’ll show ya a bastard who’s lying right there, on dat very damn moment! We all lie... Some more than others, but thats not the point, righto?”

Had feelings for someone you can’t have?

“Yeah... Ya remember I just told ya about kissin’ mi friends and shite? Well dat. I messed up real good. Like... the royal mess up! I still have feelin’s for her... Could rip mi damn heart out for her... But I think she just might be lost for mi for good... Im not giving up though! But as thin’s are.. What happened between us... Heck. It might be a lost fockin’ cause.”

Ever kissed someone of the same sex?

“Im... so very much a bean flicker, ya know? Never had interest in opposite sex... Does dat answer yer question?”

Kissed a picture? "No? Seven hells, why would I be suckin’ on some damn piece of paper?”

Slept until 5pm? “Im a night owl.. I wake up sometime durin’ the afternoon. So yeah. I will sleep until 5pm, if you dont come and wake mi up. Which is fockin’ annyin’ by tha way.. Just let mi sleep..”

Worked at a fast food chain / restaurant “Nope.. And dont have a slightest interest in such! ...I would make a fockin’ horrible restaurant worker... Now this.. may sound rather miserable, but my current job is actually mi first real day job ever! ...Or well.. A night job? Anyway.. Yeah.”

Stolen something? “I would say... Try living on streets of fockin’ Limsa Lominsa for good 10 summers, and then... if yer still alive and kickin’, try asking yaself dat question! ...Yes. I have stolen for livin’.”

Been fired from a job? “As I mentioned just a moment ago, this is mi first day job ever... And I have been able to keep it so far! ... And Im about to keep it! I want to see the faces of every poor bastard, who ever said I could not get, let alone keep a job! And well... I actually kinda like mi job, so there’s also dat. And I get a decent money out of it.”

Done something you regret? “... Really? We need to go back to this again? I had.. a really bad week some time ago, ya know. I did.. lot of shite.. The whole thin’ is just.. so foggy in mi head, its annoyin’! But yeah. I think I almost slept with mi friend.. broke lot of stuff.. a damned heirloom notestand.. And in the end, I went and kissed another friend against her will... The... one I fockin’ love.. Damn, I miss her. But it was not mi damn fault!! I had just like the shittiest week ever! ... I dont know... Maybe some of it kinda was.. Can we just go on? I focked up, okai..?”

Laughed until something you were drinking came out of your nose? “Nnno. Cant remember such thin’. Sometimes a drink has gone like... into mi nose for one or another reason... But actually out of it? I dont think so. Then again, who am I to say! One just cant remember everythin’ ya know?”

Caught a snowflake on your tongue? “No, I have not. Tha Shrimp does it, so.. technically I have? But as miself? No. I have not. On purpose at least.”

Sat on a roof top? “Used to do that in Limsa Lominsa. It was.. an awfully calming feeling, ya know? To get away from all the shite, going on down on the streets. Just... sit alone, watch the ships getting loaded.. Watch them sailin’ away. I dont do it anymore though.. The roofs in Ishgard are fockin’ slippery.”

Kissed someone you shouldn’t have? Iris gives the other a long, dead stare. “... Fockin’ really?! Didn’t I just told ya dat. Ya want some heckin’ details?! Right! So, yes, I was wasted... I shouldn’t have to... And damn yes, it was foolish of mi! Silke. The gal I fancy.. Ya know the type that just... puts damn butterflies into yer tumtum.. rises yer head up to the fockin’ pink clouds faster than anythin’ ya can buy from the streets of Ul’dah.. A damn purdiful fockin’ lass... Damn best thin’ that ever happened to mi... And I focked it up by hecking going and kissing her! So... Ya happy with dis subject now, or are ya gonna poke dat infected wound some more? If so, Im done with dis...”

Sang in the shower?

“Ummm... No.”

Been pushed into a body of water with all your clothes on? “Pushed? I... dont think so! Thrown into water with mi clothes on though... Yes! And I tell ya now! That damn merchant had a heckin’ cart full of those apples! Most of dem would have gone on waste aniway! But nooo.. I get thrown into sea, for one damn apple! One apple!! And it was not even worth it. The apple was dry like Sagolii sand the merchant’s fockin’ muffin-hole was propably full of!”

Shaved your head? "Well, I did not!! Blacksoul did durin’ the time he fockin’ kept mi as his personal damn doll or somethin’.. So yeah! It is growin’ back now, but if it looks like a damn rake-raped crow’s arse to ya, its not my fault!!”

Made a boyfriend / girlfriend cry? “I... dont know, actually! Not during mi time with her, no. We kiinda only had a fleetin’ moment though, so did not ‘ave like... too much time to make the lass cry! ... I guess she still believes mi to be dead though. So its possible she cried for mi presumed death in the hands of her husband’s underlin’s... I hope she did... Yeah.”

Shot a gun? “I did, yeah! Ya know... One of those Ishgardian ones. Loud... lot of smoke... A decent kick. Kinda like a bar night to live for! You know, Im actually even rather decent with guns.. Not my style, though.”

Still loved someone you shouldn’t? “You gotta be kiddin’ me!! ... Oh wait. Someone I shouldn’t? I dont think so... Seven hells, we heckin’ belong together!! ...She has just... yet to understan it... She will! Sooner or later... Hopefully sooner. Fock’s sake, I miss that silly gal and her nice ass...”

Have / had a tattoo? “Yeah, the one around mi eyes. I also have another one on mi thigh... Iris flowers and thorns... Four of dem. For four kinda important people in mi life. From which, I have actually lost... every single one... Fock’s sake, whats wrong with mi?!”

Liked someone, but will never tell who? “Nno. I have... some difficulties in the ‘never tell’-thingie. Im more of a... ‘tell too much’-type o’ person. But ‘ey! Kinda honesty is a good thing, right?”

Been too honest? “If bein’ too ‘onest means kiinda colorin’ the truth a little to make it hit on the mark better. Yeah. I guess so. I just may overact a bit time to time! But den again... Makes the truth more interestin’ huh?”

Ruined a surprise? “No, I hardly part-take in suprises in general...”

Been told that you’re beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? “Actually... No. I dont know!! Well, mi first girlfriend did, but did she totally mean what she said? Damn, I dont know... Considerin’ the fact she... most likely kinda sold mi out not too long after, it makes it heckin’ hard to believe anythin’ that ever crossed those sweet crimson lips of hers! I wonder why no-one has ever said it though... Im smokin’ hot!! ... So tell me. Am I beautiful..? Hm?”

Stalked someone? “If we call people watchin’ stalkin’ here, then Im damn guilty as a plague rat! But like... in the creepy wai? No! Why the heck would I do somethin’ like that. Dats just sick...”

Thought about murder? “If someone has just taken a royal shite on ya, sweet damn, thats reason enough to just shank the bastard, and scatter the innards into the sea! Most people are so fockin’ rotten though, I dunno if even damn fishies care for their foul organs... Could always make dem into a bagpipe and gift it to their family and friends... Maybe then they could actually get a taste of whut kinda shitebag they been hangin’ around with...”

How about mass murder?

“... Well, as dey say... Apple does not drop far from a tree, and sometimes those apples are rotten before dey hit the ground. So yeah. The last question in mind, why not?”

Cheated on someone? “No! Think anythin’ you want of mi, but Im fockin’ devoted!! ... Well, I have only had one relationship, that lasted for like... couple of months... But damn I was devoted... Up until she choose her husband over mi...”

Gotten so angry that you cried? “Happens time to time... Cryin’.. cleans the system, ya know. Just... Get into middle of nowhere, and scream yer lungs out!”

Tried to stay away from someone for their own good? “... Im kinda doin’ that right now. Dey will be better off without me. She’s got her damn hero dere, taking care of her... Where does she even need mi anyway? Heck, we barely even knew eachother... ... I think Im better off without dem too.. Shite.. Dey were awfully nice towards mi though.. Do I really miss dem? ... Maybe. But it all went down in flames and bloody sheets, can we talk about somethin’ else?”

Thoughts about suicide? “Sometimes the road just rises up against you... I kinda understand it on some occasions! But overall? Kinda waste...”

Had a girlfriend / boyfriend? “Yes? That one mess I mentioned earlier? Ya payin’ attention to dis?”

Gotten totally drunk during a holiday? “Used to... Especially in Limsa, it was kinda mi way to get over the holidays. Hated to see bastards walking around all merry and shite. So I drowned mi holidays in a glass. Last Starlight was different though.. Blacksoul kinda forced mi to stay sober over the holidays... Well.. Mostly sober... Dont ya go tellin’ the old goat, but I... I think I kinda liked it. The whole Starlight with Blacksoul and Gramps... I had never really celebrated it with anyone... As miself. Heck, I just wanted mi Silke to be there, heckin’ messin’ around... I wonder if she ever got mi gift...”

Tagged by wonderful @mai-takeda!! 🌹 This was lot of fun..

Tagging @umbralich (Silke) @sharkycatsifoh @hangedemperor @kyrie-silverwings @under-the-blood-moonlight @alun-ura @isuke-ejinn @ishgard @torr-sceadu @lydha-lran @glorysworn @lavender-hemlock @kazexvoss @glorified-thieves @captainkurosolaire @illia-ast @thefreelanceangel @sdavi-kitanni @kitsune-kirei @violet-warder @desimirffxiv @unatobajhiri @gildedandgolden @eo-sul @robyn-sawyer @eitur & anyone who wants to do it! Cansider yourself tagged!

#the Iris within #guilty or innocent #rp #viera

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xsspeedsterr · 4 years

Text

(Heated) a Marvel’s Spider-Man 2017 Fanfiction

(This is 1/2 prompts made by Me and @crazyfanatic97 that take place in 2x01 “How I Thwipped My Summer Vacation” so we hope you enjoy like and Reblog for more, And this has slight sexual content btw anyways enjoy)

It was a lovely Saturday in Summer and Peter, Gwen, Anya and Miles were all setting up tents and making sure they had all there food and water to Last them the week they were in the wilderness where Peter was excited to finally check something off his Perfect Summer check list hopefully no villain decides to come out of the woods so he has to ditch his friends to Spider-Man off Easier said then done givin how it seemed that over the summer, every villian seemed to want to come out of the woodwork and attack him. if Peter was being honest he was surprised that Venom hasn’t shown up When Peter was wondering what villain would pop out at him this week a pair of arms wrapped around his waist and he felt a pair of plump bubblegum pink lips plant a kiss on his cheek

"Hey, you seem a bit tense..something wrong?" Gwens soft voice whispered into his ear, reaching up to stroke his hair.

"Need some alone time with me to calm down?" She teased and Peter blushed “N-No I’m fine don’t worry” Peter smiled at Gwen "You sure, i mean...i havnt seen you most of the summer." She stroked his hair again and sighed.

"Those villians got to see more of you than i did." She pouted “Oh trust me that isn’t a good thing” Peter laughed it off rubbing his shoulder it was still a bit sore from one of his last fights Gwen reached over and massaged it a bit.

"you alright?" But non the less he tried to calm Gwen down and assure her that he was fine

Something that wasnt working too well especially when she accidently touched one of his fresher bruises Peter flinched back his arm shyly it was still stinging a bit "Mind if I kiss it?" She joked “Heh um n-no” Peter blushes this relationship was new but it was getting better everyday for him Gwen reached and pulled up his shirt enough that she could get to the shoulder and gave it a nice long kiss Then there was rustling coming from the bushes turns out it was Anya and Miles coming back with fire wood Peter started to panic Gwen pulled herself back, and threw down Peters shirt,trying too mask and hide her blush “Alright I think that’s all we’ll need for tonight” Anya said as she placed the wood beside the fire pit and turned around to Peter and Gwen but gave them a weird look once she saw them "Thats great, less work and more fun right?" Chuckled Peter “Yaaa is everything alright with you guys” Anya questioned as she took in that Gwen was covering her face and Peter was shifting around weirdly "Whatever do you mean?" Gwen innocently asked Anya just lifted an eyebrow before turning around and going to get dinner going Miles gave the two of them an equally curious look, but brushed it off to go start the fire. Peter walked over to Gwen and sighed.

"Too close." “Ya no shit Pete” Gwen laughed nervously before getting up “c’mon we should probably go help the others”

“I’d love to” Gwen smirked as she tried her hand at being seductive but wasn’t quite sure if it was working Of course givin Peters luck with girls, any attempt was bound too work

A couple hours later and they had just finished Dinner and were sitting around the camp fire with Miles trying to tell scary stories

"And then, when they looked at the car door, they found a rusty old hook..but then..the now one handed murderer came up from behind...." "And what?" Peter asked with a mouth full of marsh mellows "He threw a rock at them!" “Awww that’s lame” Gwen pouted at the sour turn of events in the story "Wait how did he throw it that hard with only one hand?" Anya inquired “He used his hook hand too?” Miles tried to recover the story "But its stuck to that door " Pointed out Peter “C’mon Pete” Miles said over exaggerating his arm movements Everyone was laughing "Sorry, i cant help it."

Anya giggled at the boys banter before yawning “alright I think I’m gonna get some shut eye now” Anya stretched out as she stood up "Yeah, i think im ready to hit the hay too "Gwen winked at Peter and giggled Peter blushed and offered to clean up when everyone went to bed "If you insist." Miles said with a shrug As everyone shuffled into there tents Peter hopped into his and laid on his sleeping bag about 10 minutes have passed by since everyone went to sleep But everyone wasn’t fully asleep then Peter heard shuffling outside and sat up on high alert

"Peter?" Gwen whispered softly into the tent “Ya?” Peter sat up and unzipped the tents door Gwen crawled right in and planted a little kiss on his shoulder, smiling as she sat on his lap “Woh hey” Peter chuckled he could feel the blood starting to flow to his groin

"Sorry, i just missed you all summer." Gwen traces her finger down his shoulder “Hey I missed you too” Peter leaned in and captured her lips while grabbing her hips Gwen giggled and lightly pushed Peter into the floor of the tent and hovered over him “Hopefully this week will be villain free” Peter signs "I hope so too" Gwen leaned down and kissed the underside of his chin. ."I need my Spidey-time " she teased Peter smiled at the nickname “if I remember correctly you owe me some alone time” Peter smirked at Gwen she was trying to tease him all day knowing he couldn’t say anything when Anya and Miles were around she was a sneaky one "Well, how about we both cash in on that offer? hmmm” she she smirked cupping his face Peter leaned into her touch as there mouths intertwined tenderly Things started to get faster as Peter sped up a bit as he pulled her in by her waist he angled his head and started to plant kisses on her neck down to her collar bone where he started to suck a bit Gwen bit her lip and started to thread her hands threw his brown hair Peters hands started to head down south as it got more heated Gwen let out a squeal as Peter squeezed her hips then started to pull her yoga pants down as there mouths found each other’s again there tongues started fighting for dominance once Gwens pants were off she started to grind on Peter then started to work his shirt up his body feeling up his abs along the way and whining a bit as she had to break there mouths apart for a second to get the damn shirt off him fully Peters hands went right back to Gwens ass once the shirt was off deciding to be daring he gave her butt a little slap and smirked into the kiss when she squeaked but that squeak turned into a breathy moan as Peters fingers hooked onto her pink panties as the other squeezed her ass

“Um are you ok in there?” Anya called out hearing how much commotion they were making in the tent there blood ran cold as they heard the tents zipper be undone and when Gwen tumbled off of Peters lap and they both looked up they saw the very confused and shocked faces of there two best friends

“Shit” Gwen swore under her breath as she covered her rosy cheeks with her hands as Peter threw his sleeping bag over his legs not wanting his friends to see his erection right now

“A-Anya Miles what are you guys doing up” Peter panicked “We thought someone was getting attacked by a bear ya know with all the sounds coming from your tent it sure sounded like it” Anya said in a accusing manner throwing in a couple Latin curses for good measure meanwhile Miles looked like a kid who had just walked in on his parents his jaw hanging open at the scene in front of him “S-so how long has this been going on for?” Miles asked a bit hurt that his friends didn’t tell him and if he was completely honest he did ship his two friends but he was to hurt to say that right now

“Um around the end of the year look we’re so sorry we didn’t tell you guys it’s just this is still pretty new so we didn’t wanna ruin the friend dynamic between all of us by throwing in our relationship” Gwen bit her lip

Anya sighed she was to tired right now to deal with this “this is not over we are talking about this in the morning” Anya warned pointing a finger at the two teens caught in the act

Peter shrunk down into the sleeping bag if he was being completely honest Anya was scarier then any villain when she got angry like this

“Ooh you guys are in trouble” Miles smirked a bit at them while he secretly thanked god it wasn’t him this time on the other side of Anyas rath

Anya turned on her heel and marched back to her tent already thinking up how she was going to dig into her friends in the morning she was definitely also gonna enlist Miles help in setting up a prank

“Alright well night guys and hey make sure to use protection” He joked as he went off to his tent as well zipping Peters back up

Gwen turned to Peter “guess we better get some sleep before we’re chewed out by Anya” “Ya” Peters heart was beating a thousand miles a minute from what just occurred between him and Gwen

Gwen laid down and wrapped her arms around him “next time we gotta find somewhere more private” “Agreed” Peter answered as he snuggled up with Gwen and fell asleep as the night went by

#peter x gwen #msm 2017 #marvelspiderman #fanfiction #anya corazon #miles morales #peter parker #gwen stacy #camping

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madamsixx · 4 years

Text

Beyond The Leather Chapter 28: I Want To Be Your Boyfriend

I was out shopping for gifts to buy for Tommy and Heather's wedding. I didn't know what would be a good gift. I mean I always thought to myself what do you buy someone who already has everything? I looked around in a jewelry shop and settled on a his and her watch.

I haven't spoken to Lisa since we had our falling out. I really missed her and our friendship. Maybe later on I will call her. I called Slash today because I wanted to talk to him about Nikki. He said he will pick me up with Duff. Nikki's call last night really got to me. I wasn't able to sleep at all and I feel like such a crappy person for how I treated him. But in my defense I'm just trying to keep my distance from the drugs. But as Lisa pointed out every body is doing. Slash is doing it and I'm meeting up with him today.

I walked outside the store and saw Duff pull up on the side. "Hey Mani your right on time." He says looking at his watch. I got up and ran into the car. The smell of wet socks and weed hit my nose right away.

"Jesus this car stinks." I say as I'm getting in and plugging my nose. "Whine down the windows."

"Well princess Iman you can always walk to our place." Slash laughs sarcastically. "So what did you get Tommy and his wife?"

"I just got his and her watches. I couldn't think of anything else." I shrugged.

"So what's on your mind doll?" Slash asks.

"Well last night Nikki called me and he sounded really paranoid. He said there were intruders in his home hiding in his closet, his washing machine, and even under his bed." I said with a worried voice.

The boys looked at each other and started laughing. "Iman look theres nothing to worry about he'll be fine." Slash laughed.

"No Slash theres nothing to laugh about. I was really scared for him. I mean he called me for a reason. And ok in London when he nearly overdosed he ask Andy McCoy from Hanoi Rocks to bring him to my hotel room."

"Oh did he now." Duff smiled." So what else did you guys do in your hotel room?" They both started laughing again.

"Saul." I grumbled. "Ok ok geez Mani when did you become such a prude." He groaned. "Look Sixx likes you and clearly he trusts you if he's running to you every time he has a problem. And to be honest what's there not to like about you. Your a good person when your not following what your manager is telling you to do."

"What's that suppose to mean?" I hissed.

"It means you need to live a little. You need to break out of the shell she's keeping you in. And your mommy dearest isn't here so you don't need to report to her like your a soldier and she's your commander." Duff buds in.

"Um who told you about me and my moms relationship?" I questioned Duff.

It goes silent in the car.

Slash takes a cigarette out of his pocket and lights it up. "The point is." He laughs hesitantly. "You need to live. Were going out tonight and your coming."

"Ok but I'm only staying-"

"Iman shut the fuck up! Your staying out till what ever time we tell you too!" Slash yelled.

We finally pull up to a complex it was really small. We got out of the car and walked into there home. Again I was hit with the smell of weed, booze, and sweat. Izzy was passed out on the couch and Steven was snorting up coke off of the table.

"Oh shit Mani what the fuck?" He looked at me shocked. "No one told me you were coming. I would have cleaned up." He looked at the boys.

"Hey Steven." I walked over and hugged him.

The place was filthy there were dirty dishes piled up in the sink, half eaten food was scattered on the table, the walls were peeling, and there were clothes everywhere. How could any one live like this.

"So wheres Axl?" I asked. "He's in his room. He's a bit pissed for some reason so don't bother him." Steven warns.

"Ok." I look down at the so called chair that they had in there living room. I didn't want to be rude but at the same time I did. I cringed when I saw a roach run into the inside of the cushion.

"Sit." Duff got up and pushed me onto the couch making me squeal and get up fast in fear that the roach got on me.

"What... what happened." Izzy woke up in panic. The boys started laughing and I was aggravated.

"Say while your here we need a womans touch. Can you clean up the kitchen and cook something for us." Slash asked kicking his feet up on the table while smoking another cigarette.

"Seriously." I laugh humorously. "I came for advice and your asking me to clean up and cook for you?" I crossed my arms.

"The advice you got in the car." Duff spoke up. "So you have to repay us back by at least cleaning the kitchen and cooking something for us." Duff walked over to the fridge and grabbed a beer.

I groaned and walked over to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and noticed there were no groceries in there for me to even cook anything.

"It would help if you guys had groceries." I pointed out.

"Go buy some we'll still be here. Plus were going out tonight. So when we pick you up, bring the groceries with you." Slash laughed.

I scoffed and started heading for the door.

"Uh doll." Duff spoke up. I turned to look at him. "The kitchen isn't finished being cleaned. Even princesses have to do dirty work." He laughed.

Ugh ass holes. I walked back to the kitchen and started cleaning it up for them. Don't ask me why?

Later on at night...

I started getting ready for the night I was going to have out with Guns. I was hoping that Lisa would be there too seeing as there was something going on between her and Axl. And well also I didn't want to be the only girl tagging along.

I put on a silver short dress and put my hair up in a pony tail. I wore matching silver stelletoes and put a small black jacket over my shoulders to finish up my look. Slash said we were going to the Rainbow. At first I was hesitant because Tamara had told me never to go back there again. And here I was getting ready to go there again. I called the office were Tamara was and told her that I would be out with Lisa. She expected me home by 11. I don't know if Slash would approve but theres nothing I can do.

I grabbed my little wrist purse and the groceries bags I promised to buy and headed downstairs. I waited in the lobby until I heard a knock on the door. I saw Slash waving for me to come out. I headed over to him.

"Here are your groceries." I said with a sarcastic voice holding the bags up.

"Thanks doll I'll put those in the trunk." Steven got out of the car and took the groceries from me and put them in the trunk. I got into the car and we took off.

"That's is not an outfit for the Rainbow Iman." Slash chuckled.

"Well that's too bad." I hiss. This dress was made more for a modeling event. But im choosing to wear it at the Rainbow.

"You are certainly going to get picked up by a fellow at the Rainbow." Izzy piped up putting his arms around my shoulder.

"I am not talking to any guys there and I hope they don't talk to me." I warn.

We got to the Rainbow and the boys were already a mess. They got drunk, did drugs, were loud, and grabbing girls left and right. But im not here to judge. But places like this were not my scene. And being here with out any girlfriends or friends was awkward. Especially because I don't drink alcohol or snort drugs. So I just sat randomly at the bar looking at people drunk or high.

"What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a raunchy place like this?"

I turned around to see a guy or could be a girl with wild long hair and plump lips looking at me. "I...I'm sorry what?" I stuttered.

"You don't belong in a place this." He leaned closer to me smiling.

"What ever." I scoffed drinking my cranberry juice and turning away from him.

He chuckled and got up to walk in front of me. "I meant that with no disrespect. I just mean if I was a guy taking you out I would take you to the most extravagant restaurant there is around here." He smiled looking me up and down.

"I'm not into fancy restaurants. And I'm here with my friends. Guns n Roses." I rolled my eyes.

"Oh shit really? I love those guys." He flipped his hair. "I watched them play a couple times down at the Troubadour."

"Are you a rock star?" I asked with raised brows.

"Not yet but I'm gonna be. And when I do become one and I'm making shit loads of cash. I'm going to take you out on a date." He spoke softly.

I scoffed, "I don't think so." I say with attitude and turn away from him again.

He chuckled and walked closer to me. "I think so. I'm a gentleman and ladies such as your self deserve gentleman's." He signaled for the bartender to come to us.

"I don't have a lot but how much is her drink?" He asked the bartender.

"No you don't have to!" I wave my hands.

"$5.75." The bartender spoke. He placed the money down on the table and the bartender took it.

"I could have payed for it myself." I looked at him with annoyance.

"I said I was a gentleman." He smiled.

He's actually really cute.

"My names Sebastian... Sebastian Bach." He smiled.

"Iman Darlington." I smiled back.

"God I hope I see you again." He took my hand and gave me a sweet kiss on the back of it.

I felt like I had butterflies in my stomach. He walked out of the Rainbow with his long hair blowing in the wind. Lord help me.

2:34 am

The boys dropped me back home and I couldn't wait to take off my heels and get undressed. I tip toed to Tamara's room and noticed she wasn't home. I was startled when I heard the phone ring. I walked back to the living room to answer it.

"Hello!"

"You were suppose to be back at the condo for 11!" She snapped.

I sighed. "I'm sorry I went out with Lisa and ended up seeing Slash. We came back late."

"Iman can't you make better friends. I mean really. Use your break to hang out with Rachel. Hopefully some of her stuck up attitude can rub on you." "Anyways I wont be back till tomorrow morning around 10. I can call Jess if you want her to-"

"No I'm good I don't need a babysitter Tammi."

"Ok alright honey call me if anything. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ok good night." I hung the phone up walking away to my room when I heard it ring again.

"Tammi I said I was ok." I raised my voice.

"Mani."

I paused for a second hearing Nikki's voice. I was hoping he wasn't a paranoid mess today again.

"N...Nikki are you alright?"

"Can you please come over?" His voice sounded shakey.

"To your home? I asked.

"Yes."

"Nikki it's late I can't"

"I need you. Please!" He cried.

"Give me your adress?" ____

The car drove up to the front gate of the house. I couldn't see the house properly because all the lights were off and it was night time. I whined the window down in the back seat and pressed the buzzer.

"Who is it?" What do you want?" He sounded paranoid.

"It's me Nikki. Its Mani." I replied hesitantly.

The gates than opened and we drove in. I told my driver to wait for me because I wasn't going to be long. I got out of the car and headed up his stone steps. I knocked on the door several times but there was no answer. I twisted the door knob and to my pleasure the door was unlocked. I let my self in and the house was dark except for a little light that was beaming through one room.

I walked around the house. It was a single level home and I noticed there three bedrooms and two bathrooms. The house was interior decorated with red velvet hangings, gothic furniture, antiques and gargoyles that loom at you out of the darkness. It was creepy being in here.

I walked towards the light that was coming out of one of the rooms. I slowly opened the door and saw Nikki. He was holding his pillow sobbing listening to his answering machine. I walked closer to him and listened to the machine play two messages.

BEEP

Frankie this is your mom. I know that your busy being a big star and all. I'd just really like to talk to you sometime call me back.

BEEP

You must have gotten the selfish gene from your father. This is selfish what your doing. I just... I just miss you frankie. Talk to me please. Dammit frankie.

End of Messages

It was his mom, my heart was aching for him. I walked to the answer machine and deleted both of the messges.

"Don't listen to a single thing that she says Nikki. It's not worth it she's not worth it. She's not worth crying over." I calmly spoke.

I moved and sat down beside him and started brushing his hair with my fingertips. I felt guilty for the way I treated him when I was in Italy. I could tell now that he was a very hurt an lonely person. I didn't want to just leave him here by himself.

"Why the fuck did you come?" He sneered.

"Because you asked me too Nikki." I snapped back at him.

He scoffed. "So now all of a sudden you care about me?"

I furrowed my brows. "Nik I always cared about you." I whispered.

"No one cares about me!" He raised his voice. "Not my mom, not my dad, not my band mates. And you especially!" He says sobbing and squeezing his pillow tighter.

"Nikki I do care about you, that's why I came when you called. That's why in London when you nearly overdosed I took care of you. I care about you so it scares me." I mumble and look down at the bed.

He lifted himself up on his elbows and looked at me with his piercing green eyes that had tears all over them.

"What scares you?" He asks with confusion.

I stay silent and just stare at the sheets not wanting to look at him. He leaned and shuffled closer to me. He lifted my chin up with his finger for me to look at him. He leaned closer to face me with his lips barley brushing mine.

"What scares you princess?" He asks again.

"How I feel about you." I breathlessly reply.

He leans forward and kisses my lips. He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me on the bed with our lips still together and lays me down beside him. I kick off my flats and pull my lips away from him catching my breath. He brushes the side of my face with his thumb.

"Mani." He whispers.

"Yes." I reply.

"I want to be your boyfriend."

#motley crue #nikki sixx #vince neil #tommy lee #mick mars #thedirt #model #chanel iman #bwwm wmbw

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fiftyshadesgrl · 4 years

Text

Part two of my brantley gilbert series! I hope everyone enjoys it.

I wake up to find myself tangled up around Brantley. Hes still asleep and its dark outside. I hear a humming sound then a bump. I realize the bus is moving. I jump up, "oh my god!"

Brantley sits up in a panic, "what is it baby?"

I pull the sheet up around me suddenly feeling vulnerable. "The bus is moving. I cant go anywhere! I have to go home."

He wraps me in his arms to comfort me. "Its okay baby girl. Why dont you just stay for the next couple of shows then if you still wanna go home, Ill make sure you get there."

"I have to work. I cant just give everything up to be a groupie."

"Hey." He said making me look at him. "You will never be a groupie. You are way better than that and you know it. Just give us some time, give me some time to show you that this time will be different."

I sigh, "what about my work?"

"Call them and tell them you need some time off."

I snicker, "the real world doesnt work like that. We cant all be Brantley Gilbert."

He lays back down and smiles, "Hell Ill call em myself." I laughed at that and can actually see him doing that. I shake my head and turn my phone on and find its only 2 in the morning. I quickly text my boss and tell him that Im taking my vacation early and Id be back in two weeks. I turn my phone back off and lay back down cuddling up to brantley.

He wraps his arms around me and kisses me. I moan and crawl on top of him. "Damn baby girl, youre gonna wear me out." He says smiling. I smiled back down at him, I cant believe I have him all to myself but the memory of three years ago comes flooding back to me.

3 years ago.....

I was out with mama becky trying to find the right dress that made me feel beautiful. I wanted to blow brantleys mind in a couple months when we say I do. Mama becky turns to me as we pull into the driveway, "hows he been lately?" I sigh and shake my head. "He has his good days and bad days."

His mama had tears in her eyes, "these days its more bad than good." I nodded but pasted a smile on my face.

"Dont worry mama, things will get better. Hopefully he will sober up by the wedding." I said hopeful but doubt still clung heavily in my mind and heart.

I hugged her and jumped out of the truck. "Ill come back this way in a couple of days to talk about the flowers and everything." Mama becky said and I nodded and waved as she pulled out of mine and brantleys driveway.

The house was unusually quiet, brantley usually had music blaring or playing his guitar chugging beer out on the front porch. I unlocked the door and walked in. "Brantley, Im back." Not one word, I walked towards the bedroom where the door was cracked open. I peeked through the crack and saw brantley laying on his stomach in bed sleeping.

I smiled at the sight of him, no matter what we go through he always and will forever hold my heart. I decided I would jump on him and wake him up that way. As I pushed the door open I gasped at what I saw. Amber, his ex laying on my side of the bed with my fiancee'.

Clothes, both his and hers, thrown everywhere meaning they were naked under the thin sheet that lay on top of them. I stood there just staring, I couldnt believe he would do this to me. He promised he would never hurt me.

I got my wits about me and finally spoke. "What the hell brantley!" He flipped over but amber still lay there sleeping. I wanted nothing more than to drag her by the hair of her head out of my house and beat her ass.

He jumped up out of bed and pulled his boxers up. I wanted to throw something at him, slap him, do something but I stood froze to the spot. He stumbled over to me and grabbed my arm and walked outside of our bedroom shutting the door.

I stopped just a few steps from the bedroom door and pulled away from him. "What the hell? Im gone for one day and youve got that whore in our bed!"

He held up his finger to his lips, "shhh."

That pissed me off that much more. "You want me to be quiet!? So I dont disturb that homewreckers sleep! I dont give a fuck if she sleeps good or not. You and her both are very lucky I dont beat both of your asses!" I got right up in his face and dared him to tell me to be quiet again.

"Look," he said holding his hands up, "I got bored last night and you wasnt here again, so I went out to the bar. She was there and I was lonely. Youre never around anymore I need some love every now and then."

I slapped him across his face hard. His head snapped back but I didnt care. "Youre a asshole, I have been planning OUR wedding that you didnt want to help with. You wouldnt be alone if you would stop popping pills and drinking and come with me and help."

He looked back at me but there was no emotion on his face. Thats what worried me most. He wasnt feeling anything. "You know I would disappoint you at our wedding if I helped. Id get something wrong."

"Well you can forget about the wedding. It seems like you got all you need right in there." I pointed towards the bedroom door. I walked towards it and slung it open. Amber was standing beside the bed just pulling brantleys shirt over her body.

I pointed at her, "you say a god damn word and Ill fuckin stomp a mudhole in your ass. I advise you to get the fuck out before I change my mind and do it anyway." She grabbed her pants and pulled them on and headed out of the room.

I grabbed a duffle bag and started shoving my clothes in it. "What are you doing?" I heard brantley say behind me. I gave a humorless chuckle and kept stuffing clothes in it.

"What does it fuckin look like?" I threw over at my shoulder.

"Looks like your making the biggest mistake of your life." He said emotionless.

Before I knew what I was doing I picked up one of his heavy boots and threw it. The boot connected with the aide of his face. "Mistake!? You think Im making a mistake. No honey you made the biggest mistake of YOUR life the moment you picked that whore up and brought her to our house!"

I kept packing my clothes and when the duffle bag was full I zipped it up and threw it over my shoulder. "Ill send kolby or mama becky to get the rest of my stuff. Dont call me when you get sober." I walked out towards the front door but stopped before I walked outside.

My heart was breaking into a million pieces. The love of my life cheated on me and doesnt seem to care. I heard his footsteps behind me.

"You walk out that door, dont you ever come back." He said, I dropped my bag and turned towards him. He smiled thinking I had decided to stay.

The tears started flowing freely then. Seeing how cold he was towards me, no emotion no love in his eyes. "What happened to us? We used to be so happy. When did things go bad?" I asked almost in a whisper.

He shrugged, "I dont know. I guess I fell out of love with you a long time ago. I dont want you anymore, Im moving on to better things. Keep the ring, pawn it, sell it whatever you wanna do."

I nodded and took the ring off my finger that I thought would never come off. I placed it in the palm of his hand and closed his hand around it. "Take care of yourself brantley." I walked back over to the door and picked my bag up and walked out to my old mustang sitting in the driveway.

I threw my bag in the back seat and slammed my car door. I started my car and drove down the driveway. I looked in my rearview mirror and saw brantley standing on the porch staring at my ring in his hand.

I drove all night that night until I made it to florida. I stopped at the first hotel and checked in. I called mama becky as soon as I was settled and told her what had happened. After that phone call I texted brantleys brother kolby and asked him to pick my stuff up from brantleys. He said he would and asked if I was okay. I replied with a simple 'I will be.' I turned my phone off and curled up on the bed crying myself to sleep.

1 year later....

I was working at a local diner as a waitress working nights mostly but whenever someone called in I would be the first to take their shift. I was run down but I needed the money.

It was a little after 1 in the morning and there was no one in the diner. I took that moment to walk outside for a smoke break. My eyes felt heavy and I probaly got a total of 4 hours of aleep over the past 36 hours. Rent had to be paid so I sucked it up and done what had to be done. I walked back into the diner and I heard on the speakers a voice from the local radio dj.

'Here is the new single from the newest and hottest thing in country music today. Heres shes my kinda crazy by brantley gilbert.'

My heart stopped as I heard his beautiful voice coming through the speakers. I closed my eyes and the lyrics just broke my heart. I have missed him so much and I still think about the day that everything changed. The bell above the door rang as someone came in the diner.

Sal the night manager walked out feom behind the counter. "Sit anywhere you like sir, our waitress will be with you shortly." I was still stuck in a daze but I cleared my head and pulled out my paper and pen ready to take the order.

I turned and walked over to the booth where the man was sitting. I couldnt believe my eyes. Brantley sitting there drumming his fingers on the table. Watching me. I stumbled a bit but remembered what happened a year ago. I stood straighter and walked over, not looking at him.

"What can I get you?" I said very coldly.

"How bout a smile darlin." He said smoothly.

I rolled my eyes. "We only serve food and drinks here. You want a smile theres a bar right across the way there. Im sure you will find lots of them there."

I still had my eyes glued to my pad of paper, my pen hovering waiting for him to say what he really wanted. After a few minutes I turned my back "let me know when you decide."

That statement was about more than just his food choices. I was wanting ro see if he really had changed. I took the rag from behind the counter and started wiping tables down that were already squeaky clean. I just wanted to keep busy. I wanted to keep my mind off of brantley.

I saw movement from the corner of my eye. I looked up and brantley was motioning for me. I walked over pulling my pen and paper pad out again. "Finally decide on something?"

I still wouldnt look at him, he sighed "yeah burger, fries, and a mountain dew."

I scribbled it down and ripped the paper off. "Alright be right back with your drink." I said turning before he could say anything else. I gave the order to the cook and got his drink ready. I waited until his food was done before I took it to him.

"Heres your food and your drink. Enjoy." I said trying to turn away but he grabbed my wrist.

"Why dont you have a seat? Looks like im your only customer so you cant be busy."

I growled and plopped down on the other side of the booth looking at anywhere but at him. I kept quiet, the only sound was the music comig from the speakers and the hum from the fridge behind the counter.

"Would you just look at me (Y/N)? Please?" He said sounding exhausted. I sighed and looked him dead in the eyes. Shutting off all emotions. I waited for him to speak, he sighed and closed his eyes. He shook his head, "you look tired."

I chuckled humorlessly, "wow thanks. Thats a nice way of saying I look like shit."

He shook his head, "no I meant it just like it came out. You look tired. But youre still beautiful."

I snickered and rolled my eyes. "Rents gotta be paid brantley. I have to work to make rent." He nodded and he opened his mouth but before he could speak I cut him off. "Why the hell are you here brantley?"

He grabbed for my hand but I pulled back. "I came to see you darlin."

I rolled my eyes, "well you saw me. Now can I get back to work?"

I went to get up but this time he did grab my hand. "Please just talk to me. Its been a year. Im sober now. Thinking clearly for the first time."

I smiled at that, "thats great brantley." I pulled my hand from his and stood up. "Im really happy that you have turned your life around. I heard your song on the radio right before you came in. Its great, just hate that its about that damn whore." I said the last part through gritted teeth. He shook his head and opened his mouth as if to say something but the bell rang above the door before he could.

I turned to see a young couple that looked weary from a road trip come in. "Hey yall sit anywhere you want. Ill be right there." I turned back towards brantley who still hadnt touched a bite of his food. I shrugged, "duty calls. Heres your check, if you want anything else let me know and Ill adjust it. If not sal can ring you up when youre done. Bye brantley, take care of yourself."

The younger couple ordered breakfast platters and coffee so I was pretty busy with refilling their cups and everything. Right as my shift ended an hour later I walked outside and lit me a much needed cigarette. I started walking over to my mustang but slowed up when I noticed brantleys truck parked right beside it. Brantley was leaning against the side of it casually smoking a cigarette himself.

I walked over just as he threw his cigarette to the ground. "There you are." He said smiling.

I fished my keys out of my purse and went to unlock my door. Brantley stopped me before I could climb in. "Hey, I was hoping we could talk for a minute." He said, his voice filled with hope.

I sighed and slumped against my car. "Im very tired brantley. I wanna go home and go to bed. Make it quick." I sighed glancing at my watch.

"Okay, look I know things ended bad between us and everything." I raised one of my eyebrows at him and crossed my arms. "Whats your point brantley?"

He sighed, "I dont know what Im trying to say. Look, mama told me where you were and I wanted to bring some stuff to you. I thought you might want it." He handed me a box the size of a shoe box. I took it and nodded.

"I uh, got a show the next town over. If you want Ill leave you a ticket at will call." He said rubbing the back of his neck.

I turned and climbed in my car and placed the box beside me in the seat. "Thanks but no thanks. Im swamped at work and I cant afford to take off."

He nodded and leaned down, "I know I just thought...."

I cut him off before he could speak. "Nothings changed brantley. Now if youll excuse me Im going home to get some sleep before my next shift in a few hours."

I cranked my car and didnt give him a chance to reply. I knew if he did then I would probably break. It was hard enough seeing him tonight and trying to act like I didnt care. All I wanted to do was throw myself in his arms and let him kiss away this last miserable lonely year.

Also in the back of my mind was what he did. He cheated when he promised he never would. He promised he would always love me but he told me that day he fell out of love with me. I could never forget that.

I drove back to my small apartment and headed straight for the bed. Sleep came easy but those blue eyes haunted my dreams.

#brantleygilbert #bg #bgnation #bgfanfic #brantleygilbertsmut #brantleygilbertfanfic

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doyouevenshipbr0 · 5 years

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gruvia drabble

~gruvia week: day five//heartache + day six//comfort~

author's note: now. its 12:14 AM as im starting this so like technicallyyyyy its day 6 lmao butttt its also kinda day 5??? and this fic just fits well with both categories. enjoy bbies<3

DSICLAIMER WAIT ok SO this one is a liiiittle heavy i aint gonna lie. its about gray dealing with his trauma a little bit after all these years. i feel like my bb is hurting and it should be addressed. things get kinda heavy, kinda cheesy, and this is deeeffffinitely repetitive from other stuff ive wrtitten before but hopefully i did my idea some justice. ok NOW enjoy<3333

Gray peered his head over to the left. Then to the right. Then he spun a little bit. And then repeat.

"Gray, is everything alright?" Mira asked him from behind the bar as he sat--well, hardly-- on a stool.

"Yeah. I'm fine." He continued looking around, scanning the guild. "Hey, have you seen Juvia today?" He blurted.

Mira was taken aback by the insistence in his voice. "No, she and Gajeel took a mission last night. They should be back soon, though."

"What?" Gray spat out. He stopped looking around for a moment and had his eyes dead on Mira.

A playful idea popped in her mind. "You know, If you would just finally ask Juvia out on a date and made things official then I bet you'd know these things. After all, isn't the poor girl waiting for your answer?" She smirked, hoping to get a rise out of him while still speaking truth.

Gray blushed and anxiously furrowed his brows. "That doesn't have anything to do with this." He muttered, and then went back on track. "So she did go on a mission?"

"Um..." She paused and raised a brow. She couldn't figure out why Gray was acting so odd. "Yes she and Gajeel went on a job. She seemed very excited for it. It's her first mission since things with Alvarez happened."

"Yeah, I know that." He snapped. "Do you know anything about the job? Where it's at? How dangerous it is?"

Mira flinched. "No... she didn't say?"

"Shit." Gray ran a shaking hand through his hair.

"Are you sure you're alright, Gray?" She leaned towards him.

Gray looked at Mira and collected himself. "Yeah. Sorry. I- uh" He spastically rose from the stool. "I gotta' go."

Just as he began to leave, Juvia and Gajeel made their way through the guild doors. Both of their clothes were tattered and ripped, both of their hair was wilder than usual. Gajeel had an arm draped over Juvia as he hobbled on one leg, and Juvia was supporting him. That was all Gray could see from a distance, but he didn't stay that far for long.

"Juvia? Gajeel? What happened." Gray was quickly approaching them.

"Nothin' serious." Gajeel answered first. "Guess we're just a little out of practice since we spent an eternity building the guild back up." He huffed.

"Mira-san, do you know if Porlyusica-san is nearby?" Juvia finally spoke, but was still hiding a bit under Gajeel as she assisted him. "We think Gajeel-kun may have broken his ankle."

"She should be. I'll go get her and tell her to meet Gajeel in the infirmary." Mira replied and began to walk away.

"I'm alright, Rain Woman." Gajeel grunted and finally let his arm fall down from her shoulder. "Don't gotta' make a fuss."

"You're hurt, Gajeel-kun. You don't have to be so stubborn." She furrowed her brows.

Finally, she fixed her gaze onto Gray. "Hello, Gray-sama!" In a flash, her arms were draped around him and one of her feet was kicked in the air. Gray stumbled back and uncomfortably held his arms hovering over her.

"I would take my own advice if I were you. You took a pretty bad beating yourself. I bet you have a concussion." He nagged back.

"A what?" Gray quickly pulled Juvia away from him with his hands on her shoulder. That was the first time he got a good look at her face. Her lip was busted up, there was dry blood stained on her nose, and her left eye was almost swollen shut and it was turned a purple-ish color.

"Juvia's fine!" She nervously laughed as she tried to dim down the seriousness. "Nothing a kiss from my darling Gray-sama couldn't fix." Juvia sang and leaned towards Gray, but he was already gone.

He brushed right by her in a moment and had Gajeel grabbed by the neck of his collar.

"What the fuck happened?" Gray growled.

"Gray-sama!" Juvia yelled.

"What do you mean what happened?!" Gajeel barked back. "We went on a mission, we got thrown around a bit. This shit happens, Fullbuster, or are you suddenly new here?"

"Her face is completely beat to shit and she might have a fucking concussion?! What the fuck were you doing, huh? Sitting around twiddling your fingers as Juvia took that beating?!" At this point, Gray had backed Gajeel up on the wall.

"Gray-sama, stop this!" Juvia ran up to Gray and grabbed onto his shoulder, trying to pry him off, but it was no use.

"What the fuck is your problem?!" Gajeel tried to ease up Gray's grip, but he was far too weak from the mission.

"Why didn't you protect her?!" Gray was practically screaming, only inches away from Gajeel.

"Please, Gray-sama!" Juvia cried out.

"Just step away, Ur!" Gray's voice cracked.

Juvia stopped. She took her hands off of Gray and took a step back. "...Ur?" She whispered.

"I-I-" Gray's hands shook even more, and his grip on Gajeel faded. "I mean, Ultear-- I mean-- Juvia!" He finally said, and his knees buckled as his hands unconsciously let go of Gajeel.

Gajeel's eyes were wide. He looked back from Gray to Juvia.

"I- I-" Gray's voice quivered, and his whole body went pale and cold. He finally looked at Juvia and was met with watered up eyes filled with sorrow and confusion. "I have to go." Gray said under his breath and practically ran out the guild.

No one said a word, and Juvia watched Gray run away from her. She felt completely helpless. It was obvious that he was hurting from something, and he needed someone.

"Juvia's going after him." She began out the guild, but Gajeel grabbed her wrist.

"Not until Porlyusica takes a look at ya'." His voice was gravely. "Plus I think he needs some time to himself anyway."

After Porlyusica treated Juvia with a couple stitches, some spells, and a potion, she felt much better and was ready to face Gray. She quickly went back to her apartment, put on some clean clothes, and made her way to Gray's place.

As she stood in front of his door, she fiund herself nervous--which was something that hardly happened when it came to Gray. Finally, she built up the courage to knock on his door.

He opened it with the normal cold look on his face, but his eyes looked emptt. He still remained as pale as he was that moment in the guild, and he just hardly looked like himself.

"Gray-sama, can-"

"I'm alright. Just go home." Gray quickly tried to close the door.

"Wait!" Juvia put a hand up and pushed.

"Look, I'm sorry about what happened earlier. I'm just tired. Let me get some rest." They continued to struggle between the door until Gray finally won, getting the door shut.

"Gray-sama, please!" Juvia called out. "What happened earlier, that wasn't like you. You need to talk about whatever's on your mind, love." Her voice softened, and she hoped he stayed nearby to hear her.

"Please let me in. Juvia just wants to talk." After a long pause, the door slowly opened.

"Ok. Come in." Gray said under his breath and quickly walked away from the door.

Juvia hastily followed him, shutting the door behind her. She trailed behind as he made his was to his living room and sat down on his couch. She followed suit, sitting on an opposing chair in the room.

"So, whaddya' wanna' talk about?" He planted his elbows on his knees and leaned forward.

"Well..." Juvia nervously started. "Let's begin with your aggression towards Gajeel-kun."

"I just haven't gotten much sleep." He immediately replied. "I was tired, irritable, and I was pissed when I saw one of my comrades hurt."

Juvia felt the word "comrade" sting her fragile heart. "Alright..." She brushed it off. "Still, Gajeel-kun was hurt and you didn't seem as shaken by it."

"I dunno'." Gray sighed. "You looked in worse shape." He seemed to have an answer for everything.

"Then how about when you called Juvia 'Ur'?" He had no answer. He looked at a wall, away from Juvia. "Or when you called Juvia 'Ultear'?"

"Ok." Gray cleared his throat and stood up. "I think you should go." He walked to the door.

"Juvia isn't leaving." She stood up, but did not move her feet.

"Seriously. Go." Gray asserted.

"No. Juvia won't." Her voice was desperate.

"Please!" His voice got louder, giving out a crack. "Please leave, Juvia." His voice was low once again, and it was frail.

"Gray-sama," Her voice was sweet. "Please just talk to me. Seriously talk to me." She walked over to the door and closed it, and he did bot resist it.

"Is this about Invel?" She finally said. After seeing his reactions to everything and adding things up in her head, she came to this semi-conclusion.

"No." He turned from her. "This isn't about anyone but me. This is about--" Juvia saw tears fill his eyes. "This is about how everyone close to me in my life dies. They all die, and it's always for me. And I can't do shit for anybody."

"Gray-sama..."

"It's true. My mom, my dad, Ur, Ultear. They all sacrificed everything they had for me." His voice was raw.

"A-and-" The tears began to squeeze out as his voice shook. "You were almost one of them. Shit, you would have been one if them if Wendy hadn't showed up in the last second."

"But Juvia is not dead, Gray-sama." She approached him. "I'm right here. Alive."

"But you almost weren't!" He cried out. "I couldn't protect you just like I couldn't do for anyone else. I want to protect you more than I've ever wanted to protect anyone! That's how badly I needed you, and I still couldn't do it! And if I had lost you-- If i lost the person I care about more than anyone else--" He choked. "I would have nothing. I would just be a shell of a person."

Juvia felt tears trickle down her cheeks. "Gray-sama..."

"So I guess I'm still a little messed up from Ur and Ultear and everybody, alright?" He sounded exhausted. "I was on edge when I heard you went on job since it was the first one since Alvarez, and I was so close to losing you before, I snapped when I saw you like that. It all came back in a second. All the death, all the pain. It was all there. It was so real."

She didn't have any words. She simply closed the distance between them, and embraced Gray in a warm hug, wrapping her arms around his back, as she was pressed up against his chest.

He was so hurt. Juvia knew he had this past, but she never saw how much it truly effected him until right then. He felt helpess, and she wanted to be there to help him. She wanted to be the light in his life, just as he was to her. She wanted to keep him warm when he was his coldest, and right then, his body was shivering.

"I love you so much, Gray-sama." She turned her head so her cheek was pressed on him. "And Juvia is sorry she put you through that."

She pulled away and cupped his damp cheeks in her hands, staring right up at his flooded eyes.

"Juvia is not going anywhere. Juvia will live for you, Gray-sama, not die. Juvia will be by your side, forever and always, just as it should be. So please, don't worry so much about this anymore. Juvia will never leave you." She spoke gently.

"Juvia I--" He paused and instead wrapped his arms around her, bending slightly so his head was in her shoulder. "Thank you."

She glided a hand through his hair. "You're welcome, darling. And please, please talk to Juvia or anyone about this whenever you need to. You're clearly hurt, my love, and this isn't something that will just go away over night. Juvia will continue to go on jobs and she will continue to be ok. So please, no more outbursts like today? We can work through this, Gray-sama."

Gray stood up straight again. "I know. You're right, I'm sorry. And I definitely owe Gajeel and Mira and apology, too." He was much more calm than before.

"I love you, Juvia." Gray said, and with confidence. Juvia froze, and needed someone to pinch--no-- kick her to make sure she wasn't dreaming.

"You--?" Was all she could say as her eyes stretched wide open. Her heart was fluttering inside her body that remained completely still in that moment in time.

"Yeah, thanks, really great response." Gray blushed and nervously ruffled a hand through his hair.

Juvia responded to that with laughter as she jumped up onto Gray, tackling him to the ground with her hovering over him.

"I love you more, Gray-sama!" Juvia's smiled stretched from ear to ear. A moment went by where Gray said nothing besides chuckling. "Aren't you going to say 'I love you most'?"

Gray groaned with embarrassment and rubbed a hand over his face. "Ok, can I just take it back now?"

Once his hand was removed, Juvia quickly leaned in and kissed Gray, sweelty pushing her lips onto his as they mingled together for a few seconds or so.

"Nope!" Juvia giddily replied.

Gray looked up at Juvia, gleaming like he'd never seen her before, and smiled in admiration.

After all this time, she stayed by his side. And in the end, he knew that she would be there, no matter what. It was just as it should be. She was finally his, and he was finally hers.

He smirked. "Good. Didn't plan on it."

#gruvia week #gruvia #doyouevenshipbr0 #gray x juvia #juvia x gray #gruvia fanfic #gruvia fanfiction #gruvia drabble #fairy tail

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artificialqueens · 5 years

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Sweets and Tea, Chapter 2// Trixya //Lin

AN: Hi guys! Lin again! Here's part 2 of Sweets and Tea! I hope y'all enjoy this chapter, and I'll hopefully have an update soon!

Trigger Warnings: None for this chapter.

“Hm?” Trixie asked her, pulling her sleeves from her hoodie down over her hands. “W-what did you,” Trixie looked around to make sure her father was around, “fuck up?” She lowered her tone as she swore.

“You didn’t message me back last night, so I assumed I had said something wrong. You read my message, and then you never replied. Was it because I changed the tone of the conversation?”

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong. I must’ve fallen asleep as I was responding or something.” It was a lame excuse, but she couldn’t tell her what actually happened.

“Oh, well, I’m glad I didn’t screw it up. Well, at least I haven’t screwed it up yet.” Katya said with a smirk. “Maybe you can reply to me sometime tonight?” She bravely asked Trixie.

Trixie felt her cheeks heat up and suspected they turned red. “Y-yeah. I have some homework to do after dance, but I should be able to reply when I finish.” Trixie fidgeted with her fingers as she looked back up at Katya. For some reason, she couldn’t help but wonder why Katya was trying to talk to her. Trixie didn’t think she was really Katya’s type, and she was straight-- at least that is what Trixie liked everyone to believe.

“You and your dedication to school,” Katya laughed. “I can wait, just text me whenever you have the time to talk. I never sleep before two a.m., so I’ll be awake. I’ll be waiting for your message Trixie.” Katya winked before turning and leaving her be.

Trixie watched as she walked out. She couldn’t help but think about messaging Katya later that night. She wanted to pull out her phone and message her right then, but she didn’t. She went about the rest of her duties: cleaning the bakery, storing the unbought pastries in the fridge, sweeping and mopping the floors, and wiping down the tables.

***

9:17pm: Hey, Katya. :) I tried not to make you wait too long, but school comes before play.

9:23pm: hi, of course youd say that. How was dance??

9:25pm: Awful! Absolutely a w f u l. We had conditioning today, and I can already tell I’m going to be sore in the morning. Anyway, how was your evening? I hope it was well.

9:27pm: barbie,, you text so proper, but i’m sorry to hear that. My night has been okay… my mom is still working but i spent time at alaska’s.

9:29pm: My dad told me that I shouldn’t use slang or improper language. He said I’d become too accustomed to it and it would cause me to use it in my day to day life. I suppose it’s just a habit now.

9:30pm: and do you listen to everything your dad tells you?

9:31pm: Yes, abide by thy father and thy mother.

9:33pm: omfg barbie, that’s from the bible!!!!

9:34pm: It is. I guess it’s the brainwashing clouding my mind.

9:35pm: is that a stab at when i voiced my opinion that religion is a form of brainwashing in chem last year?

9:36pm: It was… maybe you’re right though. Maybe it is a form of manipulation in a way. A way to get people to act the way they want them to act… do things that aren't Christian like but use the Bible to make the person feel as though they have to obey.

9:38pm: do you think you’re being manipulated

9;40pm: Oh, no. No, I don’t believe I am. I’m just saying maybe other people feel that way.

9:42pm: you sure? Im here to listen if you need it. Always

9:43pm: Why?

9:43pm: why what?

9:44pm: Why are you all of a sudden taking an interest in me?

9:45pm: because we’re friends

9:46pm: But we never texted before. I don’t want to sound rude, but I just don’t understand the want for interaction with me. When we were lab partners, you didn’t seem interested in developing a friendship with me throughout the year.

9:50pm: i dont know why. I spent a few minutes trying to figure it out, but idk… when i saw you again, I felt the need to reconnect… maybe on a more personal note? If you don’t want to have a friendship, I understand

9:52pm: I wouldn’t mind a new friend. You should text me at 802-###-####. I think it would be much easier than Instagram DM. Also, I’m going to turn my phone off now. I got in trouble last night for being on it after 10pm. Crazy how I’m 16 with a phone curfew, huh? Goodnight, Katya. :)

9:53pm: yes, it is very weird that you still have a phone curfew. I will text you in the morning and goodnight.

***

Trixie had been waiting on Katya’s message all morning. She was constantly checking her phone, causing her to get sadder and sadder every time she didn’t see a text from an unknown number.

“Beatrice, hurry up! I have a meeting for the bakery in an hour, so I need to drop you off at school early.” Her dad called from downstairs.

“I-I can walk.” She yelled. Trixie would rather walk than sit in the car with her dad. She used to love spending time with her dad, especially their car rides, but ever since her mom had passed away the car rides weren’t the same. Nothing was ever the same.

“Don’t wanna ride with me anymore?” She heard her dad’s voice get closer and turned to see him in the doorway of her bathroom. Trixie pulled her skirt down a bit more and buttoned her shirt up one more button. “You’re so beautiful, princess. You’ve grown up to be a beautiful young lady.”

“I just want to clear my head. I’m just nervous for my bible analyzation exam.” She made an excuse. “Thank you,” Trixie kept her voice low as she continued to curl her hair. “I’ll be fine, dad. I’ll send you a text message when I make it there safely.”

“Okay, princess. I’ll see you after school. Love you.” He walked over to kiss her forehead before turning away to leave.

Trixie flinched at the touch and affection before plastering on the fake smile that she always had. “Love you too.” She whispered back before sighing of relief when he exited the bathroom. A few months ago, Trixie would’ve done anything with her dad. They’d watch terrible tv shows, comedy movies, football, and dance competition shows. Now, Trixie was nervous to spend alone time with her father. He always seemed to get handsy with her if they spent more than twenty minutes together.

Trixie heard her phone ding on her countertop. She quickly picked it up and saw a message from an unknown number.

7:58am: morning trix.

7:59am: this is katya btw.

8:00am: Hi, Katya. Good morning to you as well. How are you this morning?

8:00am: tired… i just got up so that’s why i hasn’t texted earlier. what time do you have to be at school?

8:02am: My school starts at 8:00am, but I don’t have to be there until 9:00am. I don’t have a first period class. Does Riverside High still start at 9:00am?

8:03am: yes, wanna grab coffee with me? I mean i understand if you can’t or don’t want to..

8:04am: I’d love to! What time would you like to meet?

8:04am: 8:20 and at daily brew?if it isn’t close to your school, we can meet somewhere else.

8:06am: That works, it’s about a ten minute walk from my school.

8:07am: great, i’m gonna get ready and i’ll see you then

Trixie left her home at 8:10am to make her way to the coffee shop. She pulled the light pink sleeves from her crewneck over her hands in order to protect her from the air. It was only fifty degrees fahrenheit, but she didn’t like any sort of weather that is below seventy five degrees. She put her earphones in and played her current favorite songs. She softly sung along to the songs, smiling to herself as her mom’s all time favorite song began to play.

When Trixie arrived at the shop, she was starving and was also in need of caffeine. Her eyes traveled around the small shop, searching for Katya. She didn’t see anyone in the cafe except for the couple in the corner in an argument. She pulled her phone from her skirt pocket to check the time. 8:23am. She quietly sighed as she opened her text messages to text Katya. Trixie hoped she hadn’t been played or stood up by the other girl. Before she had the chance to send the message, she felt a tap on her shoulder. She quickly turned around and saw Katya. “Hi,” she smiled as she removed her earbuds.

“Hi, sorry I’m late. My shower took longer than I thought it would be.” Katya had practically ran to the coffee shop. Her hair was still drenched in water, causing the back of her shirt to become wet. Her mascara had smudged under her eyes from not being given enough time to dry. “I also probably look a mess, so once again I am sorry.”

“No, no, don’t feel bad. You look great and I just got here.” She was more concerned about Katya getting sick from the partially cold weather and wet hair. “Do you want to order and then we can sit and talk?” Trixie asked earning a nod from Katya.

#rpdr fanfiction #trixie mattel #katya zamolodchikova #trixya #high school au #sweets and tea #lin #concrit welcome #lesbian au

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queencryo · 5 years

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@silly-go-round is asleep right now.

i guess i should make a journal for the past few days. as good a time as any. as AMY. heh. cuz shes super good and amazing. heh.

uh...... lessee.... for the two days after the last journal i just. hung out at the house while silly worked. i managed to not keep her in bed and make her late the second day. hung out a lot, watched more adventure time, worked on my tumblr filter script (lie. i judt ran it on my main. 200 posts / day is a bitchhhh) , played a good amount of ds3 (to pointof tetris effect at a couple points the nexg few days)

also did some like. helpful tasks. washed some dishes (undone quicklu, but. eh). not enough, mot as much as i shouldve, but... i tried i guess.

alao we've like. said the same thing at the dame time a Lot while ive been here and its like. nice. its really nice. same wavelength! i feel so close go her.

oh! alxo night before last we went grocery shoping. got food for prolly enoygh for the two weeks, but i guess we'll see. also a cheesecake! it was.... echausting. hily fuck it was exhaysting. jesus. the store was big and it took like 3 hours and $200 to get everything but. we did itttt.

we both mentionef that like. it felt nice to like. have a full fridge 2gether. cuz. it feels like were gonna have a futjre togetjer? u know. like that is. i love her a lot and it feels good for this to feel like a home for a little while. we hope that it can be so in tbe future.

so YESTERDAY she finally FINALLY taught me how to play magic the gathering. it was. a long time coming. but she brought me into the store and like. sat me down w some regulars and had me play commander. i played moooostly her snake deck, so like.that was fun!! i kept talki g about how i woulda gotten lorescale Coatl up to 39/39 and flying, had i like. gotten q more turn. but on that game D was running a mill deck that was. extremely long to play (that game took like ~>2 hours ugh), and was very bery annoying, so i didnt get to actually do that.

but it was fun! part of me wants to blog everything, but i dont think i will.

im glad to be able to use silly's decks, bc i dont think i want to make my own. im considering making a cheap angel deck or smth, but we'll see if yhat actually ends up happening.

i also met her girlfriend Iz, who is sweet. i played magic w her fkr a while, which was fun! she was runni g an annoying mono black deck (i kkow all these... these Terms and Words now, its incredible...)

shes sweet and i think i like her. dunno if enough to date yet (which makes me Partially regret flirting w her so much in the groupchat but. hey)

talked w her some, mostly about magic, hung out while silly closed the store, pet her cat, silly discovered that cyddling w TWO girlfriends is very nice (not rhat id know ;;;;;;;), was good times. i dont think im as comfy w izzy physically yet as i may have implied in messages, which hopefully wull be rectified by the message i just sent her (my initial physical comfort with people varies, it depends very much on the person)

skip forward, me and silly make a pizza at home cuz were fuckin tired, she admonishes me for not eating for uh... like 11 hours or smth (that mornings bagel was VERY good tho omg), but adderall, so like... meh.

uh... i dont think anything else on yesterday...

today! we waaamted to go to the store at like. 2. but in actuality got there at like! 330.

i went back to sleep cuz im a losenerd, and she. made this breakfast casserole thing. which hse put into a bagel abd brought to me bc i guess shes the best person on the entire earth oh my GOD. jesus

skip... apparently she knows maximum the hormone and doesnt like them very much... fair fair. (cause for xeath)

came to the store agai. tofay. it was fun and good. iz didnt come in today, do played some more with regulars. played w what is apparently called a blink deck, which revolvea arounf exiling cards then immediately bringing them back, to capitalize on "when this enters battlefield, do smth" cards. neat!

i DID actually manage to win today!!! the victory was. literally handed to me, but like. thats fine! i was playing silly's uhhh... elintor the masked? idr her name :( the mask planewalker! deck, which. i had SO much land, most of wh8ch was enchanfed. meaning it could be tapped then untapped w eljntor's thing, then tapped again for DOUBLE MANA. i mean. i had like 9/turn even b4 that but. BUT. i also had. i think i drew 3 creatures total. bit anyway. i had the white card that gave me a life whenever a creature was put on tge board (and also, w another enchantment, made all non-me creagurss and enchantments enter the board tapped, so. nya). so... rob had a card what dealt one damGe to all other players whenevr he puta. creature on the board. then he played united forces, which lets each player commit X mana to create X 1/1 soldier tokens on all players' boards. so. we made 28 white soldier tokens on everyones board. this killed perry, ans gave me, uh. 56 life (84 - 28). i then attacked ron for 28 w the soldiers, and drew sacred mesa, which lets me sacrifice 2 mana (1 any color, 1 white, but i had so many cards that said "this land can instead be tapped for 2 of any color, so like. ueah) to create a 1/1 flying pegasus token. so i. ended the game w 44 white 1/1 tokens. goblins get fucked.attack w my ssoldiers cuz his were tapped, so brought him down to 7 life. i didng catch what he did w the enchantment, but i think he said he like. put a copy of every creature on my side of the board onto his board, and then. cipying that enchantment 3 times. so. holy FUCK. wow. BUT those all came in tapped and i had 18 flying yokens, so. i still won! yay!!!! i won a game of magic!!!!!

goblin decks scare me. stop running krenko you fucks. exponential goblins goddamn

silly would come by every so often and like. look over my dhoulder and say "oh that was dumb whyd u use fabricate for thay" which is fair. but also god i love her. (i used fabricate for a mana generator insteaf of lightning greaves. whateverrrr) i love her so much dear god. i wish i coukd help w the store more, but. on the same time i also. dont enjoy working. so. maybe part time.

hm. what ekse. oh yeah i kove her so much.

by the end of the night it was just. me and her, rob and the two regulars i started out llaying w yestwrday. theyre sweet, i like them. theyre married. the dude calls me honey smtimes, which is. kinda weird? dunno how i feel about that. i guess fine. its gender-nice, but still a lil uncomfy. otherwise i like em fien, though. but they talked abouy moving into sillys apt. so thats cool!! better than her current (awful, terrible, lazy / horrifically depressed / manchild roomate, who doesnt clean ever) roomate. i was reading the monster of the week gamebook thruout, which i... bought, for some reason. idk. oh also i wanna make a fallen angel divine, because im... predictableeee. also a conspiracy thworist whos just a trans woman w way too much time and really weird hobbies (throwing knices, butterfly knife, net friends, etc). also a spooky. i speny like. 3 hours reading thr7 the monster of the week book while ppl played magic around me. i kinda wish i hadnt bought it, but hey! its neat c:

oh, also i didnt take adderall today. i dont think it went toooo bad, i think i like. was meaner and less thohghtful with what i said, but like. i guess thats better than feared. i took a caffeine pill (200mg) at ariund 10 which is. prolly why im wide awake right now. i regret doing that, sincr from what shes said tmos gonna be big)

she says we gotta be at her moms by 4, for reasons she WONT TELL ME. bit she says its part of one of her plans, i ASSUME the romantic one? im kind of afraid that ill like. no-sell it unwillingly because im abroke and soulless human being, but uh. i guess rhats thw risks we take to be alive :shrug: im excited. were also going to a shop (diff one) tmo, which im Quite excited for, as ive only been in similar shops by accident before. also doing laundry!!! which is important ^_^

oh ysah. so we got white castle on the way home. its. yeah she was r8ght. mediocre-at-best sliders. onions are bad.

we also made a pizza. whifh i ate most of. i overate. sob.

she fell asleep halfway thry an episode of nailed it. cant blame her, she seemed really tired. i hipe i dont disturb her rwst. and i feel so utterly blessed thay i can be around her.

ih!! i also fell down the last few staies ywstersay. bruised my arms, but otherwise fine. it was. idk, it is nice to knoe that others worry fir me and like me. she was very concerned. i love her.

#blog #ohio trip 2 #journal

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breathingwithdifficulty · 4 years

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im so fucking done of being stuck in the house with my own sister and it’s becoming very clear that her abusive tendencies haven’t really gone away. she has been commenting on what i eat and what i do during the day (which is not a whole lot but... it’s quarantine. sorry for actually listening to social distancing rules unlike everyone in my house and most of the people in my town). she knows im depressed but her constant negativity and criticism isn’t helping. the whole unfairness of our relationship has become really clear. i basically wait on her hand and foot and when i don’t do something she asks of me, she gets pissed and calls me “lame” or berates me like “its not even that hard” or just “seriously? it’ll take two seconds” like damn bitch do it yourself then. im not your servant just because im your nice little sister.

i don’t ever ask anything of her. literally can’t remember the last time i asked her to do anything for me. i only ever tell her to do stuff like “leave me alone” and “stop messing with that” and “please stop, seriously” and “that hurt” (physically or emotionally) and she NEVER i mean NEVER fucking listens. she doesn’t care. she thinks it’s funny to tease me and torment me and irritate me and then blames me for being too sensitive when i finally snap at her because im pissed off. damn, maybe if you weren’t making it hard for me to breathe by suddenly jumping on me and refusing to get up and leave me alone, i wouldn’t have to push you on the floor and yell at you to get out. maybe if you weren’t constantly hypocritical, i wouldn’t be so irritated with you all the time.

we both have to do our homework at home now which isn’t that big of a deal for me since i can focus a lot better than she can and i know that. but she’s so incredibly inconsiderate. she needs complete silence when she’s doing her homework and says it’s distracting for me to even walk past her when she’s working. so i stay silent. i put headphones in to listen to videos or zoom calls and i warn her if i have to record or talk. i try not to get up and get food or use the bathroom too often. im more than considerate.

however, whenever im doing my homework, she’s facetiming her friend, being on zoom calls without headphones and with the volume on high and her talking at full volume (EVEN AFTER i offered her to use my headphones for her calls multiple times because it’s distracting for me and she was like “of course im not gonna use headphones, that would look silly” like bruh) and singing and talking and literally SCREAMING. like wordless, just screaming because she gets frustrated with her work. bro, i get it. but shut the hell up. god, she would kill me if i did some of the things she does to me while she was working. id literally get cursed and yelled at.

she asks me pretty frequently if i think she’s a good person. i think she’s a good person sometimes. i think she’s too sensitive and can’t take any sort of criticism and lashes out at me because she thinks im pretentious and bratty. she’s straight up told me that she used to resent me (starting from when i was literally a BABY) and still kind of does. she says im much better than i used to be. the only reason she thinks that is because i stopped putting up as much of a fight against her. if i ever say something sassy or rude or even just defend myself, she claims im a dickhead brat who’s spoiled and has a bad attitude. really she’s just a sensitive little bitch.

ive lost four pounds in the past couple weeks because ive been eating less by tracking my calories. i haven’t really been eating a whole lot better but i think four pounds is a pretty good start considering how this is the first time ive really tried and committed to losing weight. but even my sister doesn’t think that’s enough.

i eat a bagel with cream cheese for breakfast. she walks up and says “you know, a bagel is equal to like 5 slices of bread.” yes i know. you’ve told me already this week. you told me a month ago. you keep telling me. im just trying to eat, dude, back off and stop trying to make me feel bad because im not eating fruit smoothies and salad and avocado toast like you are. i get it, you’re skinny and healthy and like to pretend you don’t know it but you and i both know that you do. call yourself fat all you want, but my friends have literally asked if you’re a model, you have maybe an inch thick of stomach fat, i can feel the bumps of your spine when i touch your back, and i can see your ribs when you stretch your arms up.

she knows it makes me feel bad when she calls herself fat and she does not care in the slightest. she’s like “oh im getting pretty chunky oh boy” and then ill make a comment about feeling fat and she’ll be like “oh you’re not fat” like bruh i know you think you’re chunky and i have a lot more fat than you do don’t lie to me.

she told me it makes her feel worse about her hairline when i comment about how im insecure about mine. so i stopped saying anything about it. i told her it makes me feel bad when she comments on how im not doing basic things right (cutting an apple, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, sweeping. all real examples of things she says im not good at and calls me stupid. how the fuck is someone BAD at sweeping? the floor’s clean now isn’t that what matters?) and she said “well practice makes perfect” and i told her it makes me feel even worse about myself and she was just like “well you don’t know how to clean and you need to learn.”

i know how to clean. ive cleaned my room. ive cleaned the kitchen. ive cleaned our shared bathroom (she came home when i was just finishing up after deep cleaning it and even doing the parts she said she would do because i was just that nice. she immediately criticized me and said i had cleaned with the wrong cleaner and needed to reclean the whole thing again. i said no because that’s ridiculous and it was about to turn into a fight so like the pushy i am i gave in and cleaned. the whole. bathroom. again. but with a different cleaner that wasn’t “greasy” and “only for oil and grease, not bathrooms” and “smelled bad” because that really matters in the long run i guess). i just don’t do it the quickest or maybe the most efficient or the way she would do it but literally WHO CARES. if the floor is swept why does it matter that i didn’t do it as fast as you would. goddamn.

she came into my room while i was drawing on my digital tablet today. i showed her how it worked and everything and she asked to see something that id drawn and i said no (ive never been comfortable showing my art to other people that aren’t strangers online (lol) and she has consistently taken sketchbooks directly from my hands or gone through them when i was in a different room despite me telling her multiple times not to) and she kept asking for a reason and i just said i didn’t want to. she kept interrogating me and i was like “i don’t know what you want me to say” and she was like “i want a logical answer why you won’t show me” and of course i didn’t really have one and so i was just like “i don’t really have one, i just don’t wanna show you because it makes me uncomfortable” and she got pissy and left. fine, leave, don’t want you in here anyways. stop being so offended that you don’t get unfiltered access to everything in my life.

she’s a biology major. im trying to decide on a vague idea for my future major and i can’t remember how it was brought up but i said something about going into STEM and possibly biology and she was like. “aw don’t do that. i mean if it really makes you happy then go ahead but ill be upset and probably a little pissed.” which okay i get that a bit (eh) but ive never even thought about going into bio so she doesn’t have to worry and i told her as much. and then i asked why she wouldn’t want me to and she was like “because everyone knows you’d be better than me at it and i just want to have like... my thing” (i get that too (but maybe if you did your work on time and actually went to class then you’d be better at it. but whatever)) and i said i probably wouldn’t be better but i get that or whatever. and then i think she made a joke and i laughed and she was a few seconds later like “why do you look so smug? like you’re happy about the fact that i think you’re better than me” and i was like “that’s literally not true” and she was like “everyone likes feeling like they’re smart and you feel like you’re better than me and you’re smug about it” (or something like that) and i had to convince her that not i literally do not and am not smug. damn bitch, insecure much? that pissed me off that she would think that low of me to assume that i ENJOYED her insecurities and felt like i was smarter than her. wow. ive told her countless times in depth and with detail that i believe we both have strengths and weakness and neither of us are better than the other, and she still doesn’t believe me. but whatever.

it’s constant, little things like that. ive always managed to let a lot of them slide and that is one of the only reasons she thinks im such a good sister. that and i lie to her a lot about how i feel about her. she says stuff like “im surprised you haven’t killed me in my sleep yet, you’re too good to me, ive been terrible to you” but still continues. but whatever. ive only been waiting for her to move out for four years now, i guess i can wait a few more months (hopefully only that).

she says she’ll get pissed if i don’t call her every week once we aren’t living together and so i say i will but. i don’t want to. i don’t want to tell her about my life and my worried just to have her criticize them or say im being ridiculous. i don’t want to have to live like this forever. im so tired. so so tired.

im not saying it’s all bad. sometimes our donut runs at 2am are nice. and sometimes she is interested in what im doing when no one else is. sometimes, she gives good advice. sometimes we talk for hours on end. she’s one of the first people i go to when im having problems with me my mom. i trust her with somethings. it’s not all bad

but her constant emotional and verbal abuse has shaped me into a scared, pushover little girl with insecurities, trust issues, and guilt. she’s always said i was the favorite and laughs now and says “i think me being mean to you when we were younger was good for you, it too you down a few pegs so now you’re not so spoiled.” it also traumatized me and gave me self esteem issues, but yeah, haha, at least im not a spoiled brat (but to you, i still am, but only when i don’t do what you want or say what you want me to say). thanks for that.

anyways, it’s been a while since ive made a long rant. it’s past 4am and i woke up at 2:30pm today so it’s probably time to sleep and dread waking up in the morning. nice.

4.18.20 4:22AM

#food mention #ed tw #not specifically mentioned but i talked about weight and body image #body image tw #depression tw #emotional abuse #abuse tw #sisterly chronicles #.mine

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ts-hvv4 · 4 years

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EPISODE EIGHT: “MERGE! Oh bitch how tasty” - Kurt

So after Trent walked there was silence for a long time, and an announcement came out (well two). The first was the Trent announcement (RIP we will avenge you!) At the bottom it announced he was the first member of the JURY! This excites me for three reasons. First off, I never made jury on my original season in Easter Island because I won and during my second season (darksided Generations) I was a self proclaimed (with heavy delusion) pre jury robbed goddess. The second reason that I almost shit my corduroys that jury stage was here was because if I was a pre merge juror, I would not under ANY circumstance vote for someone’s game I did not see. I also know Trent is personally rooting for original Armonia villains which is a vote in my pocket if I end up at the end. My final reason that I was excited was that I was happy that Trent got to participate in the jury stage because he deserves it. He played a phenomenal pre merge game and I’m happy he gets to at least have a say in the winner, regardless of the outcome.

I was getting to my other point, the second announcement came minutes later....MERGE! Oh bitch how tasty. I was stoked because we’re officially at that point. It’s also a little scary because there’s only five original Armonia left with Trent going. I’m also scared because I know Andreas and I have bad blood from Easter Island when my alliance bullied him all season long. I have a lot of ass kissing to do and I hope I have some good acting skills because this is going to be a chore. Actually the more I think about it, the only bright side of merge is that we’re that much closer to making it to the end. Oh and NED. Hydra is reunited and oh it feels good.

MERGE!! Yes! I’m so happy, and better yet—the people I wanted out most are gone! Olivia, Keegan and Trent. They were all coming for my head, and I LOVE they left one by one. That’s karma for you. Don’t get me wrong, I like/love them all on a personal level, but game wise I’m so happy they’re gone and I’m glad Trent is fine. Now I’m meeting the final batch of people. Sarah I already know but I need to catch up with her! Nikolas unless he’s just not there is online and hasn’t responded in an hour or so, but he was cool to talk to. Lukas and Matt however I do like the most right now! Matt I feel I’m connecting with a bit and same with Lukas. Kurt and Sharifa I still feel connected to, but Kurt said he can’t trust anybody right now due to what was going on, and him and sharifa were feeling me in on everything. Basically Olivia’s antics with going after me really messed her and her group up and it got her caught with her strategy like I knew she’d get caught eventually. I peeped her and Trent way before the curve, mainly because they were that fucking obvious. Jake I have to KEEP my eye on. Because they said he was upset with Olivia going but he’s saying he heard what Olivia was trying and was happy she’s gone. So imma have to feel him out but for now I think he’s lying due to what I’ve heard. As for the heroes I love them all and I really hope we stick together or they’ll just pick us all off. And that I don’t want to happen. At all. And I just hope for once I can chill and not have my name thrown, but you never know. This could be the start to a very messy round. I usually sleep late but I might sleep early because I feel I might be getting sick and I know as soon as I take this medicine I’ll be drowsy so we’ll see!!

Whew Chile... what a moment yesterday was. So the morning after me sharifa and kurt are plotting to blindside Sarah, I see that kurt called w nicklas and downplayed our relationship which nicklas didn’t buy but wasn’t too shaded by it. But I decided to tell sharifa and kurt that I know nicklas so they trust him more Which resulted in kurt going AWFF thinking that his game was ruined or something? Idk i was shaking but we talked it out and he was calm Then the plan for Sarah gets scrapped because trent decides to quit! It sucked because he would be a number for us, but it’s best to respect his wishes.... So trent goes and then we MERGE. Lord help me. I ain’t ready for this shit S O S

We merged....... im so happy because i could not stay on the heroes for much longer. We were getting too small and it was scary honestly. Of the 12 people in the game, there's 3 I haven't played this season with yet, which isn't terrible! I'm not meeting a bunch of people. I've also had a lot happening in my personal life so that's been impacting my ability to interact. One thing that is noteworthy is that Ned, Sarah, and I have reunited finally and we are about to run this game !!!!! Let it be KNOWN!!!

So these are my thoughts on everyone: Sarah: Love her, would die for her, we are co-winning this game together with Ned. Ned: Love him, would die for him, we are co-winning this game together with Sarah. Chris: So I know I've been 'working with him' but I don't trust him because I think he's a lot closer to Malik then I think. He is good for my game but I'm only working with him because I need to. Dennis: Similarly to Chris, I am only working with him because I need to. I think he might be reading into that more then Chris is... but I could be wrong. I think he presents as more of a target then me. Malik: I think he would turn on me if it meant saving his ass. But I think he's an asset to have around because people are mad with him. Lukas: I like him, he's funny and nice. I haven't been able to play with him alot because of the swap but hopefully we can. Nicklas: I think he's very smart as a former winner, so I am careful but I think we have a decent enough connection. Matt: Me and Matt are both playing each other and it's the funniest thing ever LOL.... anyways he's smart and will shoot himself in the butt for it. Jake: Don't know him much but I heard he is a snake so I want him OUT. Sharifa: SO DANGEROUS !! I think she's really dangerous but a good ally to have around maybe (?). I have a lot of respect for her coming back and being her true self so that's very empowering. Kurt: So the thing about Kurt was we played before but I wasn't really worried about that.... but I have found out from multiple sources that he worried about that. And no amount of me talking to him has changed that? So looks like I am now worried about that? UGHH Anyways this merge should be fun.... i just want single digits

Okay so we merged and yeah now I’m feeling really grateful to have made it to this point, jokes aside. I am really grateful to have had the opportunity to not only play with Sharifa again but get to know her as a person so much deeper. She is such an admirable person and she really touches my heart. I know I’m sappy about her a lot but she truly is one of my closest friends in my real life.

The way my current relationships stand right now is ranked (w/ reasoning as so) 1. Sharifa (duh) 2. Jake (my fellow f@ggot) 3. Ned (boy you lucky for Hydra) 4. Lukas (he thinks he’s my #1, I love him tho) 5. Malik (as much as I know his act is a facade, he thinks were close so) 6. Nicklas (we had a good talk and basically compared notes, very intelligent) 7. Matt (neutral, I trust him a bit to stay villain strong but only for so long) 8. Sarah (same feelings as I have toward Matt) 9. Andreas (we spoke and I apologized and he accepted, progress people) 10. Chris (seems friendly enough but Ned told me he has an idol so kinda sketch) 11. Dennis (hard to read, nice enough but know he’s heroes strong) & HOSTS 1. Nicole (my fav host sorry boys) 2. Owen (picks up the slack) 3. Andrew (quality humour but our fight sis :( ) 4. Monty (idk her....bc she’s intern & not around much) Love y’all ❤️

So Jake came clean to Sharifa and myself about having a relationship with Nicklas. This raises serious red flags for us because it’s like we’ve been questioning if Jake is truly with us or not this entire time and have wanted to believe he was. He claims he is closer with us and Nicklas is just the equivalent to like my Lukas. Sure, that’s a fair comparison, but the difference is that I told The Cock Destroyers about Lukas. Nicklas was Jake’s best and worst kept secret. Now I’m second guessing everything I say to him but I still want to truly believe we are sisters till the end. If he fucks us over I will be absolute heartbroken. Like, he’s my amigas cheetah.

Of the four newest people I’ve met, I feel the most connected to Lukas and slightly Matt. Nicklas before comes on or messages and Sarah only messages a couple of times and then vanishes. She’s someone I also know so I could use that bond but idk if I can trust her yet or not. The only one I feel I can trust atm is lukas but I’ll have to see how that goes.

Malik is a lot. I play along with most of his flirtation and advances but it’s solely to get myself in his good graces to ensure I have a loyal ally and someone looking out for me. It’s also because I made the mistake of purposely approaching him and almost like lead him on. Now he’s so attached and I can’t for the sake of my game just be like “not really into it please stop”. And I know there’s other boys who are uncomfortable by it too. Unfortunately right now he is our Phillip and we have to keep him around for now....Fuck im so mean. I make him sound so bad, he’s actually fine, I’m just a huge asshole and Malik when you see this I’m sorry dude.

K i guess i should update you When we swapped i connected with matt and sharifa the most Hated trent bc he tried to spread my name but we decided to vote kage out bc hes crazy-anyways now that we have merged sharifa wants to form some fucking majority alliance with the villains since we have majorty Only thing is that i like chris and dennis ALSO andreas, ned and I are in a f3 together and they know I have the idol. So anyways this isnt gonna work, i need to play secret spy but its gonna be hard deceiving sharifa. I got her to confide in me that she has the idol and I told her i have the idol as well -i regret telling her Also andreas and ned told me chris has the idol so im 100% certain the 3 of us know where all the idols are. Anyways, this is messy, im still a bitch and I need to figure something out. Wish me luck bitches ‘

I don’t like Matt anymore. He keeps reading my private messages and is talking in main chat and isn’t saying much or a word or reacted to me or anything. So I feel like he’s going to try to message me once immunity is over and I’m going to just roll my eyes and laugh so hard. I thought the guy was cool, but I spoke too soon. I did feel like something was off from the gate anyways with his first responses. I just won’t message him until he messages me but rn the only villain I like from the other tribe is Lukas. Sarah step it up sis I wanna say positive things about you!! On the other hand, Teen Titans all think we’re in trouble, so I’m thinking about snatching Kurt since he doesn’t trust anyone from his tribe and see how that goes. I would do Sharifa too, but I feel she’s likely connected with the others. But if I leave her out of a vote she could very well not trust me anymore. But the only original tribe members I trust are Ned and Kurt. And I trust the Teen Titans, we just need one more number incase they come for us. Maybe rocks I see?!

Sarah says something after I mention that she hasn’t been too talkative? Hmmm

Looking at the merge, I am PUMPED and NERVOUS and ready to LOSE! A lot of different scenarios can play out here- Heroes vs Villains prevail or Armonia vs Molysmeno. I have faith it won't end in the latter, in fact, I suspect lines may be a little blurred, but maybe not in the first tribal council or two. Having that said, a lot of people are surprising me this round in a good way such as Lukas,, Kurt, and Sharifa! Whereas my old pals of Sarah and Matt might have slipped in some people's eyes, I have to keep them in mind when figuring out what happens next. Jake may be targeted but I'm not gonna count on it just yet. All in all, I think I prefer Teen Titans more than Mystery Incorporated because it feels so genuine, but we'll see!

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It would seem Malik's talking to Kurt/Lukas on turning on the villains. I'm not too sure how I feel about that. In order to fully trust that, I'd have to look into those 2 actually giving a name instead of wanting us to. Having that said, Dennis does not trust Kurt, Matt is sheeping to avoid 3-peating his merge boot status I suppose, the rest of the villains I guess dropped the whole Ned vote campaigns, and everyone else playing the Waiting Game like time is money so yeah

I do feel it is a little intriguing how the villains are acting coy and facetious when they have a majority, not to mention, hold more people than others. It's pretty telling that this group is pretty passive. Nevertheless, my intentions are to get the scoop and solve this mystery

Guess who is ready to lose their mind ???????????? So Malik is trying to get Kurt and Lukas to vote with the heroes which I know for a fact is not happening because Sarah told me that Kurt said that wasn't going to happen. Now im going to call Kurt because he's being shady and says he wants to vote the villains ? Kurt WHAT ARE YOU DOING

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My goddddddd. I hate this merged tribe. The smart thing to do would be to stick to the villain numbers, but I know each villain has like 20 connections each outside of the villain tribe. I don’t like Andreas. He is fake to me. Idk why. I’m working so hard on making Malik like me, but he’s sketchy too. I love Dennis but I don’t think he loves me that much. Ned is a ghost. As of now I’m just going to sit back and let people handle this shit without me. I don’t think I’ll be the target if the heroes seize control, so that’s good. Shall be interesting.

Just got off my hour long call with Kurt and I felt good about it, I think we can trust each other. But then DENNIS messages lukas and sends a lie to him that Malik getting Lukas and Kurt is a ploy??? WTF ???? What is happening right now

Remember when I said I was going to lose my mind? YUP thats still happening. just about to hop on call with sharifa to show im willing to work with the crazy villains

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Honestly? This vote sucks ass. As mentioned in the video, Nicklas was nice enough to tell me whats "actually" going on and I honestly feel like its best to just let it happen, because no matter what. One of my allies goes home. Either crackhead Malik, who has a big heart and is just trying his best, or big heart chris who shared his idol with apparently the entire world and has to pay the price for it. I've been contemplating about this for the past 3.5 hrs and idk, as bad as this sounds, it just feels like it is better to not properly warn him. I've tried to give him hints that something isn't up or right tonight, but I can only do so much to hopefully not completely crucify my game. Of course there is the chance that I am actually the one who is going home or they are trying to send ned home anyways and bait an idol like that, but idk. I don't know why Nicklas would lie to me, when I am a valuable number to him. IF I survive I just need to start over and get my social game going properly. If you read this Chris and you actually went home tonight, I am heartbroken and sad, I would've gone as deep as possible with you and Andreas too, if he wasn't close to others aswell.

Im getting this weird feeling in my stomach that the tribal won't go as planned. Malik has gotten really quiet, and when he does that it normally means he is mad. I'm not surprised and honestly if someone didn't run their mouth I'd be surprised. Maybe I am the one going home ?? Who knows

It's gotten like wild quiet? Am i going home ? Randomly really nervous

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rahitwocents · 6 years

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Rahi Rambles - 2017

Well...the one and only time I used to the Tumblr machine to ramble on about random shit, otherwise known as my year-end blog. Mostly because I have A LOT to get off my chest. So lets get into this.

Firstly absence from the Youtube side of things, well this is mostly due to me being busy the past couple of years with my jobs...all 2 of them. In addition the videos that I like to make take a looong time to make and fighting Adobe Premiere and the lack of resources and it was honestly disheartening to put all of my time and effort into a video and no-one seeing it and it not getting any views...except for the Loot Crate videos, fuck those. The landscape has also changed and unless you're an attractive squeaky clean Youtuber or a former viner its the worst time to be a "Youtuber" with the Adpocalypse and shit. Trust me just see Youtube Rewind 2017 That's not to say I've completely given up, once I have some space and better resources, ill definitely get back into it. Just that my priorities are elsewhere right now.

Besides I had my own stuff to focus on, that's not to say I've been completely out of the loop I always keep my ear the ground and there are things about it, I still love and certain Youtubers that I still love. but honestly if 2017 is known for any one thing its that well...it pretty much sucks to be a celebrity right now as well. But lets leave that at that.

So yeah for the life stuff that the 3/4 of you are here for.

At the end of 2015 I got my first real adult job, only a few months after graduating, now sure the job was definitely nothing to write home about and it was on a temporary contract that was flaccid as fuck yet they just kept on jerking off and jerking off and jerking off and extending instead of just giving me something more solid. But I can't lie that job did turn my life around in a lot of ways, I was sleeping and waking up normally, I made a bunch of new friends and I was hungry, motivated and eager to please even if the job was basic admin stuff, I loved it...for the most part. In addition to dangling carrots in front of me, every time I asked about a new contract and I was told I had to work up to it, they don't hand them out or whatever the fuck. Long story, short It was a massive lie perfectly corporate. While I did love the job, I always knew I never wanted to be there for longer than necessary, 1 or 2 years at the most. I became more and more frustrated when the writing was on the wall and I became pigeon holed...pigeon holed with someone who hated my fucking guts but you know you acquiesce right? especially when I was finally promised a fixed term contract(never happened). I then get moved to a different section of the office, a way from pretty much everyone and forced to work with someone who hated my guts lets call her...hmmmm...Satan or Miss Claridge whatever. So yeah im forced to work with Satan and pretending to get a long for the sake of my position. Eventually we get moved to a new team with new people as in completely new people who had just joined the company where as me and Satan had been there for 6 months to a year and WE all got promised Permanent Contract yay!! except wait...I thought we all had to earn it? and they don't just get handed out?...okay you just flat out lied to me for over a year. Thanx...but whatever I acquiesce even if I hadn't planned on being there much longer.

Fast forward about oh...I dunno 3 weeks give or take and I get fired over the phone...my permanent contract hadn't materialised...not that it was ever in progress to begin with, by the dude from the agency.

What's bizarre is how it all went down. On Friday, I get the call but I missed it because this dude decides to ring me after hours at like 6 so I missed his call, I ring back and he misses my calls so i'm like whatever and I leave it for the weekend. I go into work on Monday, no-one says a thing to me and everyone acts like its a normal day. but I call the dude and he says he'll call after work and I ask 'if theres a problem and he say's no' another lie. I get the call and I get fired rather unceremoniously. The reasons were because I said 'it is what it is' about the training we were in and I apparently I wasn't getting on well with the new team even though it was a new team and we'd only been together for...2 weeks? and in general i'm pretty shy, something that I told my manager but...whatever. oh and I said that training wasn't the same without my friend...on MY Facebook.

So I went back the next day to get my stuff and I'm not allowed to say bye to anyone or anything. So yeah that was shitty but...IT IS WHAT IT IS right?

So yeah I was devastated and felt crushed that all of my work over the year had gone to waste and i'm back to square 1. I was scared, confused and didn't think i'd get hired again. Especially when people had asked why I left my last job I had to make something up, I was THAT embarrassed.

I bounced around for a bit applying here, there and everywhere. Signing up to agencies, going for interviews etc.

So i'm driving one day and when I had lost all hope, I get a call about a job going in Hertford, real basic data entry on a 2 week contract. I took it, of course even if it was just to ease my conscience. Little did I know it would become the best job in the world, 8 months later and I feel better about myself and more valued than ive ever been.

And a lot of that has to go to my manager who has helped get rid of the massive chip on my shoulder. You see when I did lose my job, I lost a lot if not all of the confidence in myself and I was extremely cynical and negative despite all of the awesome stuff that was happening, went from temporary to fixed term within like 2 months, which was huge fro me. I always kept my cynicism to myself but my manager Terrance(I'll call her that because I got South Park on the brain) has helped me restore my confidence in myself and made me realise how awesome I am and I cant thank her enough for that. I know i'm aloof to all the nice things she says and does for me but hopefully that I always appreciate it, im just working on expressing it better. But yeah, thanks to her ive gotten back the confidence in myself and im ready to keep slayin em. Thanks Terrance :) I'm in your debt.

As for 2018...well I dunno, there are things that I wanna do but im also enjoying not knowing whats gonna happen next.

Anyways im pretty tired...so yeah have a good one, yo!

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travellers-survivor-old-west · 4 years

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Episode 1 - “It's not my fault our team chose the same song as the other team” - Cas

Let the games begin..............................

we out here. i'm on the cute yellow tribe. the only person on my tribe rn is Nicole and I already like her. i hope there's an idol hidden under joe del campo's cowboy hat

* A couple seconds later*

FKDSAHKDJFS LMAOOOO MY GIRLFRIEND ASHLEY ON THE OTHER TRIBE AND SHE LOOKIN LIKE A KARDASHIAN IN HER VID

Very excited for this to start! Tribe seems nice so far get a good vibe from eve and Ashley for sure. Just gotta feel everyone out a lil more and see how this first challenge goes

OKAY sooo I'll keep this first one brief. My tribe is pretty cool. I love Jared, I'm a little bit worried though because 1) he knows I'm a snake and will be scared of me and 2) he'll prob be able to know I'm friends with Ashley, but otherwise, he's my number 1 on this tribe and my favorite person in the cast other than ash. Like I'm so blessed to be with him and I don't think he'd turn on me yet since we'll be loyal. This Nicole girl seeemd cool in her vid then never messaged me back. Dylan seems nice but I think he might have been in bermuda or somethin LOL i've def played with him before and have no clue from what.... Sammy is cool, know him from before. And then uhhh that weird kid who had a three second vid, I hope he's out first. Ashley is on the red tribe I think? I LOVE HER she's literally my best ORG friend and she hasn't played in forever. Hope we get to a swap or merge without her doing something dumb first akhfdj. Patrick seems familiar I know he's old school and won HOS so that's cool. Eve seems cool never played with her but is that the same eve that does the challenge minis bc if so she knows im gonna pop off. Keaton good. Isaac good lol although I'm scared he'll come after me bc one time in his confessionals for a game we were in (i think indonesia?) eh talked about how big of a threat I was oops. maybe ashley will get him out for me LOL. and that austin guy seems cute, second game only awww. Black tribe has chloe YAYAYAY love her and excited to play with her. I think I'm on okay terms with Nick again, at least I really hope so lol bc bbclue was a mess but we kind of made up in ihos.... Vi/Cas I don't rlly know. payton seems like rhone but with a little more hair and less elderly wisdom. aidan's vid was weird but glad he got to the point I'm looking forward to this :) but I hope my tribe gets more active soon.

Okay so- Howdy! This is your cowboy speaking. I am going to go over my general strategy for the game and what I have done so far. I want to play a very physically/socially-centered meathead kind of game- a James Clement if you will. I want to try and win every challenge that I participate in and if we lose, I want to have 1 alliance with the strongest players that I will be 100% unwaveringly loyal to. Pretty basic stuff. So my alliance is with Owen and Sammy, which oddly enough- the last 2 Big Brother games I played, they were the people who got me out, respectively. Owen/Dana/Quill in BOTS and Sammy in Legacy3. So it's a risky group but this is the strategy that I outlined for myself so I'm gonna stick to it. They will be my F3 and I will literally ride with them until the wheels fall off. Until the hooves fall off, in western speak. I have no clue if they will be loyal to the end or try to target me on some point, but I have to try to keep them from eating the apple, because I'm not going to flip as my one-dimensional gameplan will not allow that! I confirmed with both of them that this is a trio they are good with, and the Pika-Dudes were born. I think it would be pretty rewarding for me if I could actually get them to stick together and make it to the end. But they could have other alliances on this tribe and vote me out this round for all I know, but so far my perspective is that they seem loyal Lastly, I suggested that we do the song "Before He Cheats" for the challenge, and that's the first time a tribe has ever taken my suggestion for the song, so I'm happy with that. I'll check back in if we lose the comp :)

okay so first confessional...honestly I am super excited to play with some of the people in this game. But I am just gonna talk about the challenge right now, umm so it's a music video which means.....hosts hate me...because I am always the one having to edit:,( okay so everyone got their videos to me finally except Nicole sent one vertically after I clearly said "@all plz film horizontally" so I just said bippity boppity bye. She seems sweet though and I don't want her to go anywhere soon. Anyways, Jared approached me with the idea of an alliance with me, him, and Owen which I'm totally fine with but I don't think I want to work with Jared like long game because idk if I can trust him to be like loyal to me. He is one of my fav people I just know it's a game. However I think if we go to tribal I probably would vote either Nicole or Xander. Not much confess right now except I am on a tribe with casper and his friends bc everyone forgot how to talk. alright that's it for nowwww.

#FuckMichael

What the fuck is Terlingua on someone better pray for my dude Aidan

VL: Oops

Omg yay!!!! We are safe for first tribal which I love. I'm starting to form pretty good bonds with issac,eve,and ashley so hopefully I can get it to where we all link up together for some kind of alliance.

Well so far it seems that Aidan, Chloe, Nick and I are in same mind set of voting off Payton. We shall see if it actually goes through. It’s really sad Bc the judges are all biased so now we have to vote someone out. Editing isn’t easy at all DX. I’m so sorry Payton if you’re do get voted out. You should move to the us to survive a bit longer ;-;

So my back’s been killing me all day. I thought it was from sleeping funny but clearly its from carrying this damn tribe.

This weekend was so flipping busy. I'm trying to get caught up at work before vacation and Matthew is here. I don't feel like I've gotten to bond with my tribe much. I'm glad to see Dylan A. We've not really gotten to play together much because he always gets voted out early in games we play but I don't think he will come for me and he's a bigger target than I. I like my tribe a lot. Jared is really funny and Sammy kicked butt in the challenge. I've talked to Owen a tad. I'm glad we didn't lose because I deserved to go home. I didn't get back from Erica's bday thing until 4 and then it wouldn't let me use the song I bought some it is copyrighted so I only had 30 sec then I couldn't get it to film horizontal. I'm a big ol mess. Yeeeeeeehaaaaaaw! 😂

Whew okay so I don't know anyone on my tribe (kinda) which is good but also a bit scary since its just 6 of us. Overall, I feel like everyone's a bit quiet and not too talkative. That being said, they might be talking a bunch in PMs. Right now, I am trying to stay under the radar and just be friendly with everyone. I really like Austin, Eve and Patrick right now. Keaton and Isaac are nice too but I dont really talk to them as much. If we would have lost this first immunity challenge I would have definitely wanted to vote for one of them. No official alliances yet but its still early so I think its okay. THANK FUCKING GOD WE WON. Okay well, we got 2nd but thats a win in my eyes. I just really hope I make it to jury and I will be happy so not being first boot is GREAT. Im trying to get this damn idol but I cant catch a fucking break and my ass keeps getting zapped... I dont think anyone has gotten the idol yet so I hope i get lucky and somehow get to it first. Here is how I see everyone as of right now: Austin: Probably my fave right now and hoping I can get into a f2 with him. He's funny and sweet and I feel like we get along and its pretty easy to talk to him. Eve: Eve is iconic! Want to work with her but I feel like she is really social so she might be a threat later on. Pat: Same as Eve, even though I just met him, I actually have known about him before since he is friends with some of my friends. I know he does good in games so he is someone I would like to see leave a bit sooner since I think he will be hard to get rid of later. But hes amazing and his video for the music video was ICONIC. I can see him and I becoming friends for sure. Keaton: Not much to say, I do know keaton from playing a game with him in the past but he was voted out first I think and then I hosted him in HOS but i wasnt super active in that one :) Anyway, I feel like we dont have much to talk about so I need to make more of an effort with him. I really wouldnt care to see him go tbh but who knows, this can definitely change if we start talking more. Isaac: omg okay so night one I go into everyones PMs to say hi and i notice that I already had messages with him which I found super weird because I didnt know who he was but I guess we kind of got into it like 3 years ago??? I told him I didnt remember this but i do. He was basically an asshole to me for no fucking reason. But this was 3 years ago so i really dont care so I hope he doesnt try to target me over it. He seems nice I guess but I havnt really talked to him much. In his defense he has been sick apparently but if we would have gone into this first TC I would have wanted to see him voted out first for sure.

Confessional 1: So right off the bat I talk a lot to everyone but Payton but my main issue is he’s probably not going so I’m gonna need to vote out someone I genuinely like right away. I think I’m decently connected and unless these guys are pulling off the best blindside ever I think I might possibly be semi safe??? Who knows though there’s a lot left of game to play this round so let’s let’s see who the votes will land on. I’m kinda trying to indirectly get my way but it’s like just not working out lol.

Its been a fun couple of days, im talking to my tribe and just feeling them out. Im very happy I don't have a history with any of them so I can just relax and start a clean state. Im a big fan of Jared and Sammy, but honestly nicole can go. She annoys me more than Jess's love of alcohol. I'm hoping to just chill and slide my way to merge where from there actually make moves and make my way to final 5 where we all know im gonna be voted out.

Idk what the fuck is going on lmao. I think I’m getting voted out because I haven’t talked to anyone but I’m trying to push the vote in cas instead but it might be too late because I just started talking to everyone cause I’ve been working too much.

https://youtu.be/bMY6mumIAQ0

Am I disappointed with my tribe? No. Am I disappointed with the outcome? Yes. I'm not a fan of these subjective challenges because the criteria literally changes everytime and all the judges (who are usually unqualified, uneducated and underemployed) seem to like to harp in on the most random shit like- I can't. And the fact that I, someone who never edited a fucking video before, had to do that shit just shows how useless my tribe is overall. Either useless or lazy but either way... I'm predicting a Matsing performance from this tribe. Why the fuck did I get placed here? So far people are fine but I don't /love/ anyone. Maybe I could put in more effort but like Chloe/Nick/Vi all seem fine and fun but like nobody I'm too connected with yet. I'm sure it'll come. Chloe and I seem to have the most similar personality but something tells me she's like connected idk. I don't see her going far with me. I see Nick/Vi being loyal though. Payton and Cas are like fine I guess but afaik they're the ones on the chopping block because of minimal socialization. I will be voting for Cas but honestly I don't care who goes home as long as it isn't me. I just want a tribe that isn't awful.

I like my tribe ok I guess. They’re all a girl or a gay except Keaton so that’s a plus. Despite my lack of participation in the first challenge due to my meningitis I’ve been assured that I should be safe on this tribe and I’ve been offered an alliance so we’ll see where that goes. I’m looking forward to beat sent home by Jared’s homophobic ass though. It’ll be fun

Dont sue me I'm dumb Okay this tribe is an interesting bunch, Ashley is great but scary, eve knows wtf is up, Pat and I are playing a game together rn, Issac... And Austin knows about me! Luckily we are safe but I think I can traverse this group without TOO much issue.

https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-confess-1/s-HFs1s https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-2/s-nVSd2 https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-3/s-65KCP https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-4/s-kLYio https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-6/s-r6uNi

So like, love my tribe so far, I think Issac, myself Ashley and Austin are going to become a possible / close alliance, I also LOVE LOVE LOVE pat! What a fucking legend. Rly wanna try to work w him!! Idk dont wanna lose bc that means someone has to go :(

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#yeehaw

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