#and you will get lectured for it

[hellenhighwater]

You mentioned emotional stability, which I get, but it made me think of the meme about ‘how do you not cry when people yell at you’ and I’m wondering both: whether there’s as much yelling in law as in tv, and whether you’ve ever cried while doing law

Nowhere near as much yelling as TV!

The only people I've ever had yell at me are non-attorneys who are representing themselves and who do not understand how this whole system works, and generally speaking...they're not in a position where their yelling is hurtful? Every time it's happened it's been more like a person throwing a tantrum, and I just...can't take that seriously. No one I actually work with (or opposing counsel) has ever managed to yell at me. I have cut off a couple people who were working themselves in that direction and redirected things back to being civil.

Frankly: I will not put up with that shit.

The list of people who are allowed to yell at you in a professional setting is very, very short, and the circumstances where that is appropriate are few and far between. It does happen in some workplaces but that's a question of office culture and individual shitty temper. My boss would never yell at me--it's unprofessional--and if he did he'd have my resignation on his desk by the end of the day. Opposing counsel is not entitled to yell at me; I am their professional peer and I don't have to put up with it outside the courtroom, and if it's inside a courtroom, the judge is likely to shut that down.

We're lawyers. In this profession, it's widely seen that losing your temper is a sign that you have lost your professional regulation and it discredits your argument. That's true in and out of the courtroom.

I have come near tears in court, but mostly because if I hit a certain point of rage I will tear up. Twice, I've had a judge hand down a ruling so wildly unjust and unexpected that it threw me off balance and into immediate fury, but I've always been able to keep it together and carry on without actually crying.

Mostly the practice of law is just not that personal. Even if someone is yelling, it's not at me as an individual. I don't make the laws, I don't decide the facts, I just take these things and lay them out. If someone's mad, it's not usually a personal attack. And you learn to deal with and understand that kind of anger--often frustration--as you go.

#my lawyer parents are both of the mindset that when you lose your temper you lose the argument #which resulted in a childhood where we didn't get yelled at we got lectured #i can recall very very few occasions where either of them raised their voice at us #and like yes anger does not negate a valid argument #it is appropriate in some circumstances #but most of the time it does not make a person more credible.

[greghatecrimes]

More Kutner love

#housetxt #house md #there were so many i couldve used but i had to go for him getting lectured after electrocuting himself aldkgjjekskd #like 'okay and i wont do it again. but you lecturing me can't make me go back in time and NOT do it' type of thing #lawrence kutner #an anya original #hate crimes md #alt text #queue #100 #200 #anya's bs (badly edited shitposts) #500

[heartorbit]

just how can i protect your smile?

#you guys like yaoi? can i get you some yaoi #pjsk #prsk #project sekai #proseka #tsukasa tenma #rui kamishiro #ruikasa #AUUUUUGH. #this is what finally makes me actually draw riks. vocaloid autism #putting the link in the caption because NOBODY FUCKIGN TLAKS ABOUT SCISSORHANDS EVER WHERES THE HYPE I NEED HER. SONG OF THE DECADE(2009) #this song makes me incredibly normal. my bad. i saw the miume choreography when i was like 11 and my brain shifted #i wanted their outfits to look like mikus in the mv so bad. Fuck my life for that btw stupid fuckign frill trim. why did she have to slay #tried to think of smth other than butterflies for kasa but i have no brain and tbh i hope his life is miserable so its fine #me posting this only to tmblr and not twt because i fucking hate twt #im drawing more song covers that live in my mind palace so i'll pist them there all together. and maybe here all together. who give a shit. #emnn skeleton orchestra next and it will fix me #Good lord. sorry. Im so caught up posting this for no reason. Get me out of here #im supposed to have a lecture in 3 hours but post covid symptoms say otherwise. im so fucked #i have a cyberpunk dead boy wip with them but idk i dont like posting wips on here its like an archive. n i want to actually finish it #but dear lord rendering it with their stupid outfits. clutches my chest falls to the floor. AUUUUGH #wxs killing me killing me taking damage augh auugh aughg

[hijinxinprogress]

Whenever the JL starts complaining about YJs public image YJ just straight up gaslights them

#Yj starting rumors about themselves and staging fights to make the media and jl look crazy #yj fucking with reporters and just the general public is the funniest thing to me #After the jl lectures yj about their lack of professionalism there’s always a trashy tabloid spreading rumors about yj for the next 3 month #the jl: we need to talk about your lack of professionalism in the field- #yj pretending to be sad while holding a huge stack of trashy tabloids: this is what you’re basing your opinion on?? You don’t trust me?? 🥺 #the jl having no idea they’ve been played: wait no- #young just us #young justice #yj98 #bart allen #dc impulse #kon el superboy #Greta Hayes #dc secret #Cissie king jones #Cassie sandsmark #gnc!cassie sandsmark #wondergirl #anita fite #dc empress #tim drake #dc red robin #Kon has definitely shown up ready to dismantle mfs from halfway across the world bc yj sounded distressed #And then he gets there and Barts like hold on I’ll restart it 🤩 I just found out about horror movies wtf is wrong with the past?? #Or he’s terrified Anita out her sleep again (she almost stabbed him) and she’s like dude I have fucking sleep apnea

[arkhammaid]

a story told in two pictures (a female charles leclerc x max verstappen fic draft)

or: jos verstappen is trying to play matchmaker (he's lestappen fan #1), removing all obstacles that could get in the way of his plans. because the only woman he'll ever accept as daughter in law is none other than ferrari driver charles leclerc

inspired by the fact that jos verstappen follows charles leclerc on instagram

#lestappen #f1 #anne talks: about drafts and wips #i kid you not i wrote 2k words in this mornings lecture #genderbent fics have a special place in my heart #combining this with my lestappen obsession and the fact that mf jos verstappen follows charles out of all drivers... #(he also follows a few others but you get what i mean) #fic idea

[canisalbus]

About the accents: if someone has a very "proper" Italian they are either foreigners or politicians/dignitaries/etc. So that fits perfectly for Machete, but I think it would be so funny if he sometimes slipped up and used a Nepalese word bc he forgot one in "proper" Italian lol

(Funny to me cause Naples has its own language in addition to accent, and most people don't actually know those words)

.

#ah that's good to hear! #glad it fits him #there's no way he gets it perfect every time #especially in the absence of widely used standardized Italian in the original canon era #there's bound to be a mix up every now and then #I don't know how likely it would be that he absorbed much Venetian at the time he lived there #I remember reading that lectures in medieval and early premodern universities were held in Latin but I could be wrong #even though his original native language is Sicilian I think he has probably lost a lot if not most of it due to lack of use #but it would be kind of funny if the Neapolitan and/or Sicilian influences resurfaced occasionally in private casual conversations #and Vasco who to my knowledge has never been to the south would be left guessing what he was even trying to say #I'm taking the easy way out and lowering their language barriers a bit out of convenience bear with me #I'm not competent enough to deal with all the different languages and dialects and the communication issues that would come with them #answered #anonymous #sorry to point out an obvious typo but I think you must've gotten Neapolitan/Napolese autocorrected to Nepalese by accident or something #unless Machete has secret ties to Nepali that I'm not aware of #which would be quite a twist

[thejasontoddarchives]

52/WW III Part One: A Call to Arms #1 (2007)

You know you’ve hit rock bottom when you’re standing naked in front of a monument meant to honor a dead version of yourself while you’re alive, holding the Nightwing suit in one hand and the pill helmet in the other

#peak male form actually #jason todd #dc #I love how nobody but Martian Manhunter really knew the brothers in blood arc had started and even then it was just a side note #because too much shit was happening in this story for that to have any bearing whatsoever at that moment #but also because Jason playing dress up isn't a big league issue it just happened to cross manhunter's radar lol #so Jason makes the decision to dress up as Nightwing and go to ny as black adam is destroying the world and the trinity is gone #he finds a group of criminals about to run off with a suitcase of cash #he gives them a mini lecture about how irresponsible it is for decorated self-important heroes like Bruce to disappear at a time like this #and how it’d also be irresponsible of him if he’d let them get away knowing they’re going to fuck shit up while the world is ending #it’s implied he killed them #then it cuts to a panel of him with the suitcase #saying that’s the easiest money he made and ‘this vigilante thing is a breeze’ #as if he didn’t pretty much do the same thing to the biggest drug lords of Gotham like five minutes ago #giving them a big scare and leaving with 40% of their millions #granted he did have to guillotine a bunch of their lieutenants but he said it himself it was only 2 hrs and he got 40% #also that second part is even funnier because he says it as if vigilantism isn’t *the only thing* he’s done pretty much his whole life #like. you boosted car parts and sold them for money to dodge the foster system. then you were robin. ROBIN. #edit: phrasing

[thankstothe]

#house md #gregory house #james wilson #hilson #screencap #s04e10 “It's a Wonderful Lie” #*Wilson about to launch into the lecture about caring for someone* #*House in the most convoluted way possible with the insults that show the level of attention to details* I CARE ABOUT YOU #AND THEN WILSON WITHOUT SKIPPING A BEAT GETS IT #ARGHHGHGHHHhhh #jfc just ask him to fuck you #it can't be that hard #this is a whole five year plan #or maybe a decade or two

[oncillabrigade]

Someday, Damian is going to outpace Tim height-wise. He'll be at least a couple inches taller, because Damian's parents are both tall(ish) while Tim has done everything in his power short of getting an Ed Elric-style arm to stunt his own growth.

Once that happens, Damian will uncover his greatest power of all, a power he had only dreamt of before now, a power possessed by Superboy himself. Because once Dami is even a centimeter over Tim's head, this will occur:

Tim: Nice try, [insert rogue name], but you've officially been busted by Red Robin and the boy wonder himself.

Damian: Why does your name come first?

Tim: I'm older.

Damian:

Damian: *opens mouth*

Damian: *draws the biggest breath of his life*

Damian: I'M TALLER!!!!!

Unfortunately for Damian, he is not Jon, and Tim is not ten, and therefore, Tim has a comeback.

Tim: Name a single culture where height is a basis for authority and we'll talk.

Damian is devastated. He lashes out. They have their biggest argument in years. It gets physical. It gets vicious.

And yes, the rogue does get away while they fight.

#batfam #tim drake #damian wayne #jon kent #red robin #robin #superboy #they get back to the cave to a dick grayson lecture on letting a sibling fight get in the way of a mission #they point out the hypocrisy #given dick and jason can't go three seconds without arguing on patrol #jay: ah but you see we still get the rogue #dick: exactly! learn from your elders! #tim: your elders huh? not your... TALLERS? #damian just straight stabs him right then and there

[thewriterowl]

Din: (incredibly tired) So, if a stranger says they have an injured Lothal-kit in their ship you...

Luke: (soaking wet) Go into their ship and help!

Din: (sprays him again) No, Luke. No.

#star wars #the mandalorian #dinluke #din djarin #luke skywalker #you can never take this head cannon from me #i 100% believe Luke has to be told stranger danger lectures ALL THE TIME #even Jedi Master Luke and his need to do kind things #the dude is gonna be kidnapped #like i don't care how god-like he is #he's gonna get kidnapped #also #feralsunspot #this is also to blame on you #this is probably how he meets hondo tbh and then the pirate is all “cute and feral I SHALL KEEP HIM” #Din is forever in a panic

[ofmdee]

i've been seeing my gifs get reposted on twitter lately, and i'm p sure people are getting them off of my tumblr, so i wanted to make a post and say please don't do that, i have a twitter account & an entire directory of things i've posted, you can easily rt or qrt them from there!

i'd rather people didn't repost my stuff at all, but if you do, at least acknowledge that you got it from me? gif making isn't simple, and gifs don't just appear out of nowhere, someone had to take time out of their day to make them. and the entire process of making them, and making them look GOOD, takes work!

and yes it's a labor of love, but seeing other people benefit from your labor kinda sucks?

a gif before/after editing, for example!!

i know i'm not saying anything that hasn't been said before, but this has been bothering me so. here we are!!

pls don't repost gifs!!!!

reblog/retweet the heck out of them, by all means! it's easier than making your own post, anyway!! 😉

okay, got that out of my system, i hope. carry on!

#mine #xoxod #sry but this has been BOTHERING ME #i dont mean to be like lecture-y or whatever but i genuinely get the feeling that #some people dont truly realize that gifs don't just leap fully formed onto the internet #at least that is what i like to believe #rather than someone doing it maliciously #but im too nervous to Actually confront reposters so you get me kinda vaguing to the void #ok im gonna go eat dinner now

[thisisallthehattersfault]

Someone makes a choked, shocked sound. Someone else yelps. It occurs to Ace, somewhere between the howling in his ears and the ache in his lungs and the taste of salt and iron flooding his mouth, that this is probably pretty surprising for his brothers to witness. Maybe even downright upsetting.

The thing is, Ace was wading into the jungles on his own as early as four years old. Dadan taught him how to do basic shit like talk and wipe his ass, but he honestly didn't have a ton of human interaction before meeting Sabo. And the thing about Sabo was that he had more than enough human interaction for the both of them. Ace learned some manners from Makino, but while Sabo was still around, there wasn't really any reason to get... good, at people.

But then Sabo died, and Ace needed to teach himself not only to talk his way out of trouble but also how to be the nice brother, how to treat Luffy with the softness he needed and deserved, how to gentle his hands and his voice and his words. So Ace did that, because he needed to, and it turned out to actually be pretty useful for dealing with people when he wasn't actively looking for a fight. So he stuck with it.

Which is all to say that by the time he'd joined up with Whitebeard, Ace was as close to tame as he had ever been. Almost downright domesticated.

Ace snaps his head to the side, putting some real momentum into it, heaving with all his weight until something tears. When he drops to his feet he springs right back up again, lunging. He spits out his mouthful as he goes, lets his jaw drop open.

The thing is, Ace is a child of the wilderness. He raised himself among that wilderness, and then he raised Luffy among that wilderness. He's a son of the jungle at heart, no matter how good he's gotten at pretending to be a person.

The sea-stone cuffs are chaffing his wrists. He feels tired and heavy, but he doesn't need his fire to be dangerous. Doesn't even need his hands.

Teeth find an artery. Body-hot blood sprays his face as Ace bites down, lock-jawed and snarling. Rears back and rips.

Another marine goes down. Ace spits out a chunk of the man's throat and is already rounding on a third. Notices, with a vague annoyance, that he's gonna need to find a toothpick -- there's a scrap of tendon or something caught in his teeth.

Mmm. Boar. They had pork for dinner, ah, the other night? Three days ago? Something like that, but it doesn't taste the same as wild boar does. And anyway, meat on the Moby is always overcooked. Ace is allowed to eat blue steak, but everybody always yells at him when he tries to steal bites of poultry or Sea King or whatever else while it's still tender and bleeding. This fight is giving Ace a real craving!

Duck. Lunge. Bite down, hard, thunder of a rabbit-quick pulse against his tongue, bulge of tender flesh against his soft palate. Iron and salt in his mouth.

Fear has a flavor. It is bitter and acrid, reminiscent of char, and Ace hadn't liked it much when he was young and still learning how to hunt. It stiffens up the meat, too, makes it kinda chewy. Somewhere along the line, he'd acquired a taste for it, though. He still marks it as a point of pride, his ability to hunt and kill prey without it ever knowing he was there, roasting something that is tender-sweet and gives easily under his teeth -- but the taste of fear isn't so bad either. Sometimes he even prefers it, gets a craving for it. Like wild boar, he hasn't had it in a while. Maybe he'll chase down his own dinner tonight.

Ace rears back. Muscle fibers split, skin stretches until it snaps. A heave, and a body crumples to the ground, gurgling. He gnaws kind of idly on his mouthful while he catches his breath, snorting blood out of his nose and straining his ears. Sounds like the fight's over, then.

Another lump of trachea gets spat into the dirt. Ace turns to face his brothers, counting heads -- good, it looks like nobody got hurt too bad, everybody is still standing! He grins. Ah, they're all pretty pale though, that's a little bit concerning, he hopes nobody's in shock. He learned from Marco that that can happen to anybody, even if they've been in a whole lot of fights.

"Hey!" Ace chirps. "Is everybody okay?" His wrists are killing him. Also, he really needs a shower. He's got blood in his ears, how the hell did that happen? But first he jogs over to where the others are all standing, clumped together, still just. Kinda staring at him.

Okay. Concerning. "You guys alright?" He asks again, lower. "Is anybody hurt? What happened?"

"Ace, man," Deuce says. His voice sounds kind of shaky. He drags a hand through his hair, fucking it up even worse than it already is. "What the fuck was that?"

#One Piece #portgas d ace #fire fist ace #feral jungle child ace my beloved #cat in human body ace my beloved #Do you think ace has ever proudly presented whitebeard #with dead marines or enemy pirates or whatever #the way a cat presents their humans with a bird they caught? #Do you think ace gets lectured about the dangers of cannibalism and blood-born disease #because he ends up with human blood in his mouth during fights so often #and he gets offended and confused every time the conversation comes up #he's not a cannibal! He doesn't EAT people! What's wrong with you! #he's just fighting!!! That's all!!! #Marco tries to explain that blood in the mouth is blood in the mouth no matter how the blood got there #Ace is. Not listening. #Luffy does this too btw #Sabo did this once before his memories came back #and got the blood born disease lecture #and then he gets his memories back and goes right back to biting people #because it's What Ace Would Have Wanted

[wickedcriminal]

I bet Big Toothless eventually sees Little Hiccup as his own little brother

Indeed!! As the Haddock family pretty much sees Big Toothless as Elder Hiccup's twin-from-another-species, Big Tooth acts every bit as much of a big brother to Younger as Elder does. This includes heckling, arguing, teaching, protecting, and even ganging up together to tease your other brother 😂

It's especially prevalent during the time they travel as Outcasts, where Big Tooth takes it upon himself to be Minicup's second shadow and resident brother figure. The amount of times Minicup would have been murdered if not for Big Tooth is staggering.

#hbau #half brothers au #my art #ask #Little Toothless is the baby of the family and thus is the most annoying <3 #i get lowkey emotional thinking about Big Tooth being Minicup's other Big Brother #you just know he and Elder gang up to lecture him sometime #httyd #how to train your dragon #httyd au

[ilovebeingaturtle]

Rank tmnt characters by who you would call to hide a body with you <--- joking (unless)

I want the court to know that the reason this appears so in-depth is because…uh, well-um. Hm.

#tmnt #rottmnt #tmnt 1987 #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2003 #I’m sure 12!Leo would be perfect for the job I just can’t risk the chance I’d get a lecture instead it’s like a 50/50 chance #03!Leo would like try secretly teach a moral lesson or something but like he’d still agree you know #like I could zone him out #honestly Rise!Raph probably should have been in the tier with 03 and 12!Casey he’s liable to get overexcited and use his powers for it #which wouldn’t exactly lend itself to um. subtlety ❤️

[ineedtorantaboutjiangcheng]

Fuck, I'm here again. Goddammit. I've been doing well. I've been keeping Jiang Cheng off my mind (and my computer screen). Things have been peaceful.

And then today happened.

Again, a fic. Again, not naming names, both because that's rude and also because this issue is hardly specific to one fic alone. I've seen it many times.

But I've been pacing for half an hour, too agitated to keep reading, so I'm just gonna get this off my chest, and then skim through the fic 'til it stops talking about it.

I need to talk about the golden core reveal.

Specifically, I need to talk about an attitude I've seen cropping up recently in a lot of fics. (By recently, I don't mean it's only recent fics that do it, just that I've only noticed it recently.)

So it'll be a fic, usually canon divergent, but prior to the golden core reveal. Wen Ning or Wen Qing will often be involved (though I can think of a few times it was Lan Wangji). And the character, who knows the truth about the golden core transfer, will urge Wei Wuxian to tell Jiang Cheng.

They'll say "you have to tell him". They'll say "he'll find out eventually". They'll say "he deserves to know".

And... the fic will support this.

Will frame Wei Wuxian as irrational, paranoid even, to keep it secret.

Will sometimes even punish him, narratively, for his "failure" to disclose such a thing.

And I am... completely baffled.

Where the fuck is this coming from?

I suppose, if I'm being generous, I can kind of see why an individual sympathising with Jiang Cheng might have a knee-jerk reaction to this. If you see them as being essentially family, the idea that a family member that you love deeply, keeping what amounts to both a huge sacrifice and a massive disability from you would be extremely painful. You might feel hurt, that they didn't tell you. Angry, at the implied lack of trust.

I get it, as an emotional response you might have in the moment. I don't find it particularly relatable, but I can follow the thought process.

But like... that's an emotional response. Surely, at some point, logic has to kick in, right?

Because the thing is. Okay, there's two aspects to the secret, right? One, is that a medical procedure was done to Jiang Cheng, sort of like an organ transplant, I suppose, but he wasn't told that the organ was donated by Wei Wuxian. And the other is that Wei Wuxian made this huge sacrifice for Jiang Cheng, and didn't tell him.

But thinking about this for even five minutes should tell you that... neither of those things are actually Wei Wuxian's responsibility to deal with?

The first one is the by far the more common argument I've seen. I've read fics where Wen Ning and Wen Qing are tortured with guilt over having performed the procedure without telling Jiang Cheng all the details. I've even seen people have them blame Wei Wuxian, for demanding they keep it secret, had them secretly resent him for it. He's portrayed as deeply selfish, for keeping the truth of Jiang Cheng's operation from him.

But the thing is... if you're going to apply modern medical ethics to the situation... Wei Wuxian was in the right? They all were?

Under modern medical ethics, you have no right to know the identity of your organ donor. That can feel a little weird (it's probably why people often have a knee-jerk reaction that demands the opposite); after all, it's my body, shouldn't I have a right to know where the organ that goes in it comes from? What if it has cooties?

But according to medical ethics, the donor's right to medical privacy is more protected that the recipient's right to that information. Right to medical privacy is pretty highly valued; it kind of ties into body autonomy, which is kind of the keystone of... most modern ethics. You have a right to control what happens to your body, and that includes controlling whether or not people know about any medical conditions/procedures. So you might have an emotional response, thinking Jiang Cheng is valid for being upset that his golden core came from Wei Wuxian without him knowing, but... ethically, Wei Wuxian has the right to withhold that information.

But! some scarecrow says, If a person has the right to control what procedures happen to their body, surely that means Jiang Cheng has a right to control what happens to his own body! Therefore, the procedure was still unethical, because he didn't know everything!

And I say, well... not really. The reality is, we don't actually know how much Jiang Cheng was told. He was told to walk up a mountain, lie to the person he encountered about his identity, and ask for a golden core. And he left that mountain with said golden core... but we don't know how much Wen Qing told him when he reached the top. We know he believed Wen Qing was the Baoshan Sanren. We know he received a fully developed core, not just the ability to form a new one. Was he told that the core was from someone else? Were there signs of the transfer? Did he know the chance of success/failure? Did he not find any of the situation dubious?

(Did he really spend two and a half years fighting a war alongside, and then running a sect for a year with, someone and not realise they didn't use orthodox cultivation even once?)

The truth is, a doctor is required to inform a patient of risks, and answer any questions they ask. Wen Qing may well have disclosed the risk (if there was any to Jiang Cheng, other than potentially the transfer failing) prior to the surgery, we just don't know. We don't have any evidence that Jiang Cheng asked any questions, and from what we see in the novel, it seems likely that he simply didn't want to know. He got a core, his life was somewhat back on track; we never see any evidence of curiosity or confusion in him as to the specifics of how that happened.

The only lie we are sure that he was told was the identity of the person who he met on the mountain, who "gave" him the core. I could be petty and point out that as he was also lying about his identity, it kind of cancels out, but that would be a bit ridiculous, and unnecessary besides. The truth is, ethically, Wen Qing could have knocked him out and performed the surgery from the comfort of her own office. Because one of, if not the main reason you can ethically violate someone's body autonomy... is to save a life. And Jiang Cheng, after losing first his family and sect, and then his golden core, displayed clear suicidal ideation. He indicated, repeatedly, that he wanted to die. He refused food. Wei Wuxian even doubled checked, before giving him hope of getting a new core, that he was serious! (Rereading that scene is horrible; Wei Wuxian's dread, and eventual resignation/resolve becomes very apparent once you know what's happening).

The characters around him, including a trained doctor, believed that if he didn't get a new core, he would give up and die. Under those circumstances, a doctor has authority to make medical decisions, without a patients consent, if they believe it is a medical emergency. Wen Qing was an unquestionably brilliant doctor; if she believed doing the surgery was the right/necessary decision, who the hell are we to dispute her?

So, to be clear, under modern medical ethics (which seems to be what is being applied in these claims), Wen Qing has the right to do whatever surgery she feels necessary to save the life of her patient, no consent needed, and Wei Wuxian has the right to keep his identity as the donor a secret, since that's his own private medical history. Modern medical ethics (a bit ridiculous, when talking about magic powers, but I've seen the argument) supports our protagonist.

Now, onto the other thing. This is a lot less... ethics discussion and a lot more feels-bad-so-wrong type thing. Wei Wuxian kept the loss of his golden core a secret.

Jiang Cheng being upset by this is understandable. Like I said, I can follow the emotion/logic. Someone keeping a big secret from you can be hurtful.

But just because it's hurtful to you, doesn't mean they're in the wrong to do it!

If someone I cared about kept a massive secret from me, and I found out, I'd be upset! But my first thought would be 'Why did they feel they couldn't tell me?' And the answer here is obvious; Wei Wuxian didn't think he could tell Jiang Cheng because he knew he'd be horrible about it! Wei Wuxian admits, after the reveal, that the process of losing his core was distressing, and that he wasn't as okay with it as he pretended to be. If something like that happens to you (not... that it can, but, you know, equivalent), and you're struggling to hold it together, the last thing you want is someone you care about yelling at you about it, insulting you, making you feel bad for what happened!

Wei Wuxian didn't tell Jiang Cheng because he knew Jiang Cheng would be awful to him because of it. Jiang Cheng's jealousy when they were young was something Wei Wuxian felt he had to manage*, and he knew Jiang Cheng would feel inadequate if he realised his accomplishments were made with Wei Wuxian's core. And he would then lash out at Wei Wuxian for it, at a time when Wei Wuxian was already feeling emotionally fragile. Hell, nearly twenty years later, Jiang Cheng getting up in his face was enough to cause a Qi deviation; I can't imagine it would have been better any sooner!

No one wants to think of the people they love keeping secrets from them. And sometimes, people who keep secrets are doing it for their own sake, because they're scared, or unsure, or guilty, or whatever. But sometimes, when a person keeps a secret, the reason is not internal. If someone acts horribly to you when you tell them things, you're going to stop telling them things. And the person responsible for that gap in communication is them; all you're doing is protecting yourself.

And before anyone thinks that I'm assigning reasoning to Wei Wuxian that he doesn't have; he essentially admits it. After the reveal, Wei Wuxian states that he knew Jiang Cheng would react badly (though he didn't expect it to be quite so bad). Wei Wuxian is shown to have been managing Jiang Cheng's moods since they were young**, it's probably not the first secret he's kept. But that's kind of just... how that works; if a king kills every person who brings him bad news, eventually, all his advisors will only ever bring him good news. And he has no one to blame when his kingdom falls but himself.

SO. tl;dr. Modern medical ethics supports Wen Qing performing the golden core transfer, and Wei Wuxian keeping his identity as the donor a secret. Jiang Cheng can be upset at Wei Wuxian for not telling him that he no longer has a core, but it's not unethical, or selfish, and the nature of their relationship, with Jiang Cheng lashing out with impunity and Wei Wuxian trying to manage his moods, meant that secrets like that were pretty much inevitable. Unhealthy relationships are unhealthy. Truly, newsworthy take.

And one final note, on Wei Wuxian keeping secrets from Jiang Cheng and being portrayed as selfish for doing so; I have yet to see a. single. fic. that says Wei Wuxian keeping his sacrifice secret is wrong, but then goes on hold Jiang Cheng equally accountable for keeping his sacrifice secret. Not. One. Jiang Cheng often tells Wei Wuxian afterwards, that he deliberately got the Wens attention, but he's never framed as selfish for keeping that secret. Not. Once.

* see post-Xuanwu argument, when Wei Wuxian drags himself out of his sick bed, having just woken up from a coma, to reassure Jiang Cheng that he's no threat to his birthright. Because Jiang Cheng was jealous that his father acknowledged Wei Wuxian's skill in surviving, under horrendous circumstances. -_-

** childhood flashback; after arriving in a new place, having a massive change in lifestyle and meeting many new people (and, it seems, trying to make a good impression), Wei Wuxian took the blame for his broken leg, despite it being because Jiang Cheng locked him out of his room and threatened to sic dogs on him. Entirely because he knew one of them would get blamed, and he wanted to keep Jiang Cheng happy. People who grow up with aggressive/abusive family/people around often end up learning to juggle mood changes.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #canon jiang cheng #urgh #i didn't mean for this to be so long #or so lecture-y #look i just feel very strongly about body autonomy #and the ethics around privacy #so i get really really angry when people act like wwx was in the wrong here #you have a right to medical privacy! #its IMPORTANT #(but also sorry)

[smhalltheurlsaretaken]

to that anon I got about my last posts: if you're hurt that I'm talking about antisemitism on tumblr rather than the Israel/Palestine conflict itself then you're going to have to make your peace with a star wars blog not being an effective platform for activism.

This is the point I've been trying to hammer home perfectly illustrated. I deviated ever so slightly from what's allowed on the subject to say that I can't participate in this website's idea of 'raising awareness' (distributing real facts and misinfo alike without a care and being a bunch of fanatic Jew haters in the process) and that I don't think I'm able to critically and accurately examine every piece of news that gets passed around here, and you're taking this to assume I don't care. So no, I'm not going to spend my time trying to prove that I do care to that particular crowd.

You're upset with me for not treating this like I did fandom and assuming I value fictional characters more than real people because of it, but it's precisely because this is infinitely more important that I'm not going to be doing real people the disrespect of giving my two cents on their suffering and deaths on the same platform I did STAR WARS.

#You don't know how I feel about the conflict and you can't claim to know #Because I made a point of not getting into it #I have tons of things I'd say and that I'm not saying #precisely because a bunch of sheltered western young adults (which I am) thinking they HAVE to speak out #about things they're primarily exposed to on social media #is how we ended up where we're at on this website #and by the way 'antisemitism is wrong' stands on its own and i don't need to say more no matter the context #and I won't be lectured about how I need to care about innocent people suffering and dying by a website full of raging antisemites #you were never upset about me shutting up on the war for months until I mentioned antisemitism and suddenly my not speaking out is wrong #why do you only care about my silence now and not before? #and why do you take me so seriously that my stepping away is matter of great disappointment to you?