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sixtysixproblems · 3 days

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disaster ramble about my headcanons for how the batch got their names & etc*

*this is related to a fic of mine (fluorescent mistakes/mistakesverse), tho having read it is 100% unnecessary to understand the post, and I'll likely use some of these for other fics as well.

the only HCs you (sort of) "need" to know is cody, fox, and wolffe are "triplets", and i say fuck canon and Rex is 3 years (1.5 years) younger than CC batch. bits in italics/blue are less applicable outside of the fic itself, but still make sense without the context or i give the context.

Cody (Kote) - got the name Kote pretty young, changed it to Cody tho around 16-17ish?

>Jango gave it to him, when he was 10ish..? Possibly even a little younger. Jango intended as more of a nickname for just him to use, but obv it didn’t stay that way. Was very proud of "earning it" for a long time. >Changed it to Cody later in a not-so-subtle rebellion against Jango/the Kaminoans, and partially in an attempt to choose something for himself/have a part of his identity outside of his skill as a commander. >Still uses Kote on very rare occasions with the batch and other old friends from kamino ONLY (only exceptions to use it more being Fox who gets to call him Kot'ika, Rex who get a free pass for anything/everything) >his name backstory is probably most plot relevant cause his arc deals a LOT with identity issues & such. Might even have a flashback to him snapping at Jango that "it's cody now" > The final nail in the hammer for changing it was probably Ponds getting reconditioned**, and him partially blaming Jango for it :(

Fox - before rex was around (so pre 13)

>Got called a “fox” due to him being a sneaky clever bastard, but it wasn’t a nickname until he made it one >chose it not long after cody, probably? >this was a pretty big deal since it wasn't a) widely used by trainers, mostly other vode, and b) he made it clear it was his name. not a nickname, not a title, his name, as opposed to his designation number >I'm considering backstory that him & colt worked together to come up with the idea to bulshit the kaminoans with "it's actually more tactically useful in battle to have recognizable nicknames for the clones", which is true, but also to limit consequences for getting caught using names. >in addition to joint guilt in the creation of Ponds's name, he's also responsible for Thorn's name by repeatedly calling him a "prick" and "thorn in my ass" on kamino (tho that's it's own post lmao).

Wolffe - before rex was around (so pre 13)

>inspired by fox, but also spells it that way to spite fox (cody gave him the idea for it lol) >cody was annoyed that wolffe clearly chose it to match fox (bitey twins, lol) since they're supposed to be triplets. wolffe enjoys pissing him off but didn't want him to feel actually left out...so cody got to help with the god awful spelling. >confused some people into thinking it was pronounced "wolf-y". this is brought to you by my friend reading fluorescent before any other piece of star wars media and assuming that. >i love the potential meaning u can take from it of him being family/"pack" oriented and how that translates over to him being very loyal, protective, etc. Aka on the surface level he's this scary grumpy guy, but deep down is just a bit of a softie/just wants to keep his family safe. >but on a less serious note, i also love all the jokes i can make cough cough omegaverse

Rex - age 10-11ish

>encouraged to pick a name out by cody to help cope with being newly reconditioned/placed with the CCs as i imagine there’d be some identity issues after that :( >perhaps nicknamed king or little prince or smth and that's where he got the rex idea. tho tbh i have no idea >abridged fluorescent lore is that he was a particularly talented/borderline defective CT, tho albiet from a "troublesome" batch. consequently he was reconditioned pretty heavily around 9-10ish, and Jango came up with the great (sarcasm) idea to use him sort of as a "test" of what CTs were actually capable of, and had him mixed into CC training. >this is how he met the batch, after not remembering his own/many details of his life pre-recon. they were supposed to train him once or twice, but predictably adopted him.

Bly - after rex arrived (and rex got his name) but not long after, so 13?

>litterally just chose a name they liked the sound of and thought fit them like a sane person. literally the only one to pick a normal name a normal way out of the whole batch. we stan >i like the hc being short for smth (like butterfly, etc) but i dont think it works for fluorescent :/ maybe in another fic. >possible them & rex worked together to find names that fit them bc i think that'd be sweet. i dont focus on their relationship much at all so maybe a little bonding, albiet in backstory only, is in order. >she's very likely gonna be trans (mtf) in fluorescent (tho it wasn't always the plan + she is not out yet (to herself or others) in the fic itself) so I'm considering implying Bly is traditionally a female/gender-neutral name in whatever star wars culture it's "from" (aka i make shit up) >considering a joke where someone asks her if she's picking a new one after she comes out and she's like "absolutely not, it was so hard the first time i refuse to do it again".

Ponds - last to get one, 14-15ish?

>went by “four” or 54 before he got his name. >Bly sometimes jokingly called him “squared”/ ”square”/ ”cubed”/etc when they were tweens cause of the two fours in his designation number + 64 is a perfect square in math. the vode assumed he'd pick one or one would eventually catch on permanently. >...and then he shoved three separate trainers in a pond, on three separate trips no less, during off-planet training (and since I'm guessing off-planet training was very rare, wtf buddy) >and the triplets went “you know what would be funny” and just. Picked it for him, and wouldn't stop calling him that, and eventually it caught on. And there was nothing he could do about it <3 >**yes, he was reconditioned at 16-17ish. Yay....Not much of a spoiler hopefully? this may somehow be related to why he was the last to "choose" (read: accept defeat) a name, despite being a outspoknen/protective ori'vod nightmare for the Kaminoans. >dw it's not too angsty. they didn't fuck with his memories much, and were trying to change his behavior to be "less inclined to rebelliousness/contempt for authority". And if you've read his arc in fluorescent, you know they failed spectacularly at making him less likely to break the rules. >tbh I think its fitting for (how I write) his character that his name was chosen by his siblings. i think he was and is "salty" about it, but not-so-secretely touched and/or proud about it.

this whole thing was very ramble-y and i'll be surprised if more than 2 people read it, lmao, but i couldn't stop myself. a lot of this is sort of "background" and may not be actually referenced in the fic itself...but who knows.

#fluorescent mistakes #sixes talks (unfortunately)#sixes rambles #fluorescent snippet #my fic #my headcanons #clone wars #commander cody #commander fox #commander wolffe #captain rex #commander bly

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queer-n-here · 2 days

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Hi lol I’m just here to request Tachihara again (i was the one who requested him before haha). I saw that you wrote the fic and that’s awesome and I’m super grateful, but I wasn’t able to finish it bc I can’t read noncon (just a personal thing).

But yeah! I’ve been loving your other works and I was debating even sending this cuz i didn't wanna sound entitled or anything but if you’re up for writing another Tachihara fic, I’d be stoked to read it! The other options on the poll you put out all sounded really good so maybe one of those? Up to you! And feel free to shoot down this request, no hard feelings :)

Bro 😭 I'm sorry the fic wasn't to your taste. Also, this is for other people who wanna send asks, too. If there are certain themes that you're not comfortable with, please specify! I don't want to make y'all uncomfortable, and I think I remember you saying that you were okay with anything, anon *accusing side eye*.

Hehe, no worries though, and you didn't come off as entitled at all. In fact, you sounded so polite I was like damn I need to do this hahah (dont worry, I took no pressure, as you can probably tell from the time it took for me to dish this things out, I'm sorry brooooo 😭😭)

Also, I'm glad you like my works! ☺ Thank you for reading, and I hope you like this one, too!

In the poll that I did for Tachihara, the second place was taken by 'Edging+Overstim' so imma do that one!

Contents: Edging 'Hara and then overstimming him.

Warnings: Smut, top male reader, lil bit of nipple play, one case of degradation, edging, overstim, I'm writing this at 2:24 because my bae just went offline and I'm horny :(

Tachihara was barely even sane about three hours in.

You'd been edging him for so long, he couldn't focus on anything anymore. His eyes were dripping with tears, his hips bucking up to push himself deeper into your cock, only for you to grab his waist with a hiss and hold him in place.

Gods, you couldn't help but admire how sexy he looked like that, eyes glazed over and thighs trembling, hands clutching your shoulders so tight he'd drawn blood a while ago. Another sob shook his bruised chest as you remained stationary in him, so big against his walls but not moving.

"[Name]," He whined, the jut of his throat rolling. "Hhng, p-please..."

"Hmm..." You considered giving him what he wanted.

You raised a hand, letting it trail across his skin, caressing his torso, his waist, his thighs...

Tachihara moved to lean into the touch, his gaze pleasingly pathetic despite his brain having turned to mush.

You leaved down and, surprising the both of you with your gentleness, placed a kiss on Tachihara's forehead.

"Alright, then." You said, your voice husky with desire.

And then your hips started moving again, this time with a ferocity that sent the man underneath you scrambling for purchase, his grip slipping from your shoulders. His hands landed on the sheets on either side of his head and he gripped them tightly, back arching as your thrusts grew deeper and deeper.

The sounds of sex echoed across the room, and each one of your thrusts hit Tachihara's sweet spots at the accuracy of a professional sniper, sending his mind hurling, making him whimper. His moans were growing louder, and his untouched dick was leaking pre-cum onto the sheets.

It didn't take Tachihara long to come. A couple tugs at his nipples had him spilling all over himself, making a mess out of his abdomen. His body shuddered as he panted, body lax under you, till he realized you weren't stopping.

"A-ah! I just... Mmph! I just c-came, [Name], please..."

"Please what, baby?" You drawled, your pace wild and unrestrained, your gaze on Tachihara's body predatory. "Isn't this what you wanted?"

And he just whined, fat tears spilling from his red and puffy eyes as he shook his head, but at the same time his hole clenched around you, making you widen your eyes and then smirk.

"Such a fucking slut, 'Hara..."

You ended up fucking him till he was shooting blanks, till the half-begging expression on his face slowly turned into a fucked-out one, till he couldn't even say your name anymore.

Clean up was a pain in the neck as usual, but after changing the sheets when you laid behind Tachihara in the bathtub, holding him against you, you couldn't help but sigh in contempt.

As long as you had him by your side, you couldn't hell but think that life was good.

#dom male reader #top male reader #dom reader #sub bsd #bungou stray dogs #sub bsd x you #bsd x you #sub bungou stray dogs #sub bungou stray dog x you #sub character #sub character x you #top reader #sub male character x you #sub male character

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izzyspussy · 9 months

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forgot i had this page

#jack facts #writing process #tatg #gold rush #every time we touch #etwt looks so pathetic compared to the other two #and yet it's the one that's giving me the most trouble #and the only one i'm considering giving up on lol #alas

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edwardwonghaupepelutivrusky4th · 11 months

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wah i looove their designs and animation...

#sketched last night looped ''hot air balloon'' track last night rewatched elemental last night you know just how it is....i love it all augh #elemental #elemental 2023 #pixar elemental #elemental fanart #ember lumen #wade ripple #it's so fun how just going w/the flow waviness drawing a wade is Correct. some flamey shiveriness / jaggedness in ember's lines is Correct #and it's all the more fun how it's like oh ofc not quite hitting the mark of how great their designs really are....so so good #and of course the expressive elasticity not only with their faces but the way their bodies ft. respective elements can be expressive #in addition to just usual [assume you have a usual literal human body] expressiveness options in posture / movement etc lol #also was thinking about how like we know everything we Need to know re: wade & his dad but also have so [zero details there]#which is interesting to wonder about. kinda assumed like oh a parent got sick & died but now considering how it could've been an accident..#the tiny layer of A Reaction he has when ember's talking abt parents giving up everything for you: could be nothing much; or Anything #also noting i Didn't note the first instances that they hear each other's names or introduce themselves thusly lol #or at least i sure can't recall it. just start knowing the other's name partway through which Isn't A Problem but it's like #ooh just more to consider & reexamine. i love to pick up More Details & that's helped by my difficulty in catching them in the first place #one thing about me i don't Catch things i don't Notice shit i don't Get stuff. and also of course: i do though lol #always a trip when it's like oh i love this movie i'm seeing it probably the two dozenth time #and then i notice something for the very first time that was clearly straightup meant to be Gotten upon the immediate viewing #even to the extent that smthing later seems to be kinda happening out of nowhere if you didn't. & i'd just rolled with it #like ok i'm autistic ofc that's something i gotta do all the time. & the adhd means i might keep getting distracted around the same pts.

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bloomingsalma · 3 months

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i think one of the most disappointing things is to see that your childhood friends have grown up to represent the kind of people you're disappointed in

#had a friendship break up w like one of my entire friend groups of six ppl?#found out that one of the girls in our friend group had sent screenshots of our private conversation about smth I was hurt over #to a gc with our other friends (but not me ofc)#and they all proceeded to talk shit about me :// I swear the way my stomach dropped when the friend I was having the convo w #sent me screenshots of what our mutual friends were saying about me #she knew how much it would hurt me but still did it just to prove a point (though I'm certain she misrepresented our conversation + my word #to them considering she blocked out what she had initially said to them lol)#my stomach hasn't dropped like that since high school #which is exactly where I thought we left this kind of deceitful behaviour. like how are you guys twenty one and still sending screenshots #and talking bad behind only one (1) friend's back when you know she can't defend herself in that space #I immediately texted our collective gc to explain a text she had sent but failed to give context for #then told them if I'm as selfish as they say I will leave this friend group. and then I left that gc #I also texted two friends who I knew were talking shit and I sent them the screenshots that first “friend” sent and pointed out how #she blocked out what she said so I'm suspicious that she skewed our conversation so they (the two other “friends”) should be wary #I told them I understood it was fair game to stoop. this low considering neither of them tried to reach out to me to hear my side #or defend me + my privacy #for context: the original argument was me voicing out that I was upset bc that first “friend” had invited and planned with with our friend #group an event that landed on my birthday without checking in with me if I was planning to spend time with them that day #and she kept defending herself and saying she didn't know I'd plan smth (probably bc my bday is two months away lmao) and she said #the event they'd be attending is just as important and necessary as being there for my birthday?? it's literally just a party her brother #(who none of us are close to lol) is DJing at. and I brought up how I'm their close friend (not her brother) and it's not fair to call #it equally necessary. but I suspect she skewed what I said greatly considering all of our friends started calling me selfish and unfair #but yeah v v crazy and hurtful and just astonishing #salmaspeaks

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sysig · 9 months

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Just be honest! (Patreon)

Bonus:

Could be :)

#Doodles #Wander Over Yonder #Emperor Awesome #Commander Peepers #Maybe something less friendship and more something else Eyesome? :3c #Could be :)#Hhhh yet more fun poses and contact points! Especially Awesome's legs and Peepers resting his ''cheek'' on his hand :D #The slight squish upgrading to a full squish with the shape of his eye-cheek changing! I did that and I'm happy about it! Haha ♪#Plus how fun it is to draw him sitting lightly with his arm on his leg ah ♥ His proportions are so fun #Anyway ♪ Lol #Awesome's feeling all introspective and it's giving him the vapours lol #He's a hedonist! A coward! A gossip! Someone who coasts through life with no care to who he steps on! Except ♪#Not me thinking Peepers could be Awesome's Wander lol - ''If I stopped hating that one thing then what was the point of hating the rest?''#As soon as he starts seeing the humanity of one little guy where does that put him ♫#Personally I think he'd still be a mostly selfish jerk - at least for a while - considering how hard realizing he even Likes Peeps would be #Even here he's like ''This sucks! Being friends with you bites and not in the cool way!'' Lol #He's just being a baby and coming to terms with his feelings #And Peepers might possibly be picking up on that a little bit :) It's still comedically optimized not to worry lol ♫#Awesome is only starting to approach his own feelings but he's being very obvious - throwing a tantrum even lol #So Peeps noticing before Awesome realizing he should be hiding it way harder than he currently is - he just doesn't know yet!#Probably both blushing up a storm just before bed that night lol ''Can't believe I said all that to him'' ''He takes me seriously'' hehe <3 #It feels good! Trust and understanding slowly building up :) That's what makes me interested in their dynamic! :D

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snug-as-bugalugs-in-rugalugs · 2 months

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Hey fellow Murdochians, I need something new to obsess over :) So if you have the inclination, please reblog this post and put in the tags (or just normal reblogs) a piece of symbolism or parallel or some other kind of connection you noticed in the show that, even if the creators may not have intended it, makes you go a little insane :)

#murdoch mysteries #cbc murdoch #rb game #ok ill go first #ummm im sure this has been said before but other characters giving watts pretzels always seems to symbolize acceptance in one way or other #like when jackson said he 'wasn't interested in anything unusual' and seemed rather disturbed by watts' pretzel #in s10e12 #which is a bit. yk. considering watts is rather 'unusual' himself so to speak #but then in s10e15 when watts is rejected by the only family he has left #and feeling so alone and abandoned #jackson buys an 'unusual' little pretzel anyway for him basically saying like. you may be a weirdo #but we're friends now and i'm here for you #and i think a bit of unusuality might be ok #(tragic that he died before watts ever convinced him to try a pretzel himself hhfdkhfk)#also the inspector giving watts his pretzel back after beating up that guy who was hatecriming him in s15 #obviously symbolizes acceptance of him being gay #and then the most recent one with george at the end of s16 #was right after the 'despite who i am?' 'because of who you are' scene #so i think that's pretty self explanatory lol #there might be other instances but i don't remember #in retrospect the writers may have actually intended this one #its pretty straightforward. but i think its neat

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keeps-ache · 1 month

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DARN, missed it again! 2nd anniversary of being a they/themer :D

#just me hi #i should cue a post for next year cuz i just Keep missing it hfhsv #cool though!! two years of queer yeah babyyy #i now have it/its but they/them was where i started hehe :>#i've considered neos but you know i think they'd be a bit much for me lol #character customization Truly #//i am NOT missing this blog's birthday. proooollyyyy hghfsh #these aren't such huge things but i like to know things have happened hfsh :3 #these are two things i really only celebrate on here so i've just Gotta say it :33 #//anyway i've been listening to the radio a lot (did i say that? i think i told you that some weeks ago lmao) and it's Funnn (mostlyyy) :D #yes they play the same 15 songs over and over and i'm starting to learn all the words to even the most unremarkable ones but that's part of #the Fun :DD #been listening to it because once in a while they play a song i already have in my playlist (yayy !!) or a song that i like (which then goe #in the Playlist (yayy !!)) that and it supplies a background track to whatever i'm talking about with my siblings which is funny at times #/imagine. you've slipped up. a secret of another's you were never supposed to know was mentioned by accident. so instead of #trying to excuse yourself from guilt you admit to knowing even More. the person you're speaking to is betrayed confused and overall upset.#and you're trying to get in contact with a ghost to give you pointers. it's not great. in the background Lovin On Me is playing #that's how our games have been going hfhsvhf #/i let them play in the plots of my stories sometimes and it's So Ridiculous Dude #i've had to ban specific organs from their characters because they were being wretched little beings. it Was funny though i'll not deny hfh #they've tormented shye + weirded out oath + killed and been killed many times #there were a couple times i saw genuine horror on their faces and i am living on that i'm ngl hfhsvbhs #like the horse thing! it would take a sec to explain so i won't go into it but oh i hurt myself laughing Lolll (it was dark but it was stil #funny hfbvs)#//OH i've gtg now lol --#ciao ciao see you somewhere later from now !! :D

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verdiesque · 2 months

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howww do people do this

#god. sorry i'm going to be very dramatic and pathetic about this so just warning you in advance #it's just. i can't make a choice either way and i want all options to be open to me and i'm STUCK #bc ideally i know i should return and work there and i want to but leaving means giving up the chance at the only romantic #relationship i can see myself being in #but then even staying isn't a guarantee of a normal one either given the distances not to mention everything else #and like. do i give up on all my friends and family back home. what am i supposed to dooooooooo #it's very unfair that i have to make the decision now when things have finally begun to feel normal and then this'll ruin everything again #i can't believe i'm even considering talking to my dad about it #i know i won't be able to though bc i start crying every time i talk about it lol #but like whatever

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bigcats-birds-and-books · 1 year

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i am not immune to the barnes and noble preorder sale :(

#text #personal #books #preorder #in my defense i HAVE been eyeballing a lot of things for a Long Time #one of them has been literal years #one of them has been months #and THREE OF THEM ARE ONES I'VE BEEN WAITING ON PAPERBACKS FOR #(paperback preorders apparently still count in B&N land!!!)#AND #AAAND #the paperbacks are ones i've been waiting on for up to months before their hardback release so like. i'm having a lot of self control here #i did also pass on several new upcoming releases because they're Only Hardback and i have a smidgen of Shelf Control #(i want the paperbacks if i am unsure of something lol)#but water outlaws has been on my list since the publisher's deal was announced lol #so i'll spring for that in hardback obviously #and walking practice looks Wild and i was hoping it was paperback but it looks weird enough that i'll give the hardback a go #(also that cover is Wild i Want It)#and then half-built garden and how to be eaten and disorientation are the paperbacks #i'm doing pretty good all things considered #AND my card won't charge til they come out and the earliest ones are in march #so february is still safe #a n y w a y #i should be finishing this paragraph of driscoll but. i'm not.

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neriyon · 10 months

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Dressing him up once again~

Purple one feels more canon for him, but I really like the thigh high boots in the black one and how the shorter hem brings them out

#ffxiv #ffxiv screenshots #neri's screens #purple one also has a cute little scroll on the backside #he was supposed to be crafter only but uhhh i'm now considering giving him some custom ink mage/pictomancer job #whatever he ends up canonically being he'll always be my little dress-up doll lol #little magnolia

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xxlovelynovaxx · 11 months

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Thinking more about the rude anons lately and just... what kind of person do you have to be to go to a random stranger's inbox, assume you know enough about them to tell them they're crazy, or that they need therapy because you disagree with them saying "actually, you should listen to marginalized people about their own oppression and experiences", or that they're a pick-me for using microlabels well-accepted and defended by the community they belong to, or...?

What kind of convoluted reasoning do you have to have, what kind of self-awareness do you have to lack, to think you're somehow doing justice by saying that psych should be used as a tool by majority society to force conformity on anyone who harmlessly annoys you or makes you uncomfortable, and yet not see that historically that's how it's been and continues to be used (in ways that likely actively harm them too)?

How little do you know about psychiatry to not understand that very little of it actually overlaps with neurology, both being infant sciences, and that psychiatry as its intended separate from ableism and capitalism is simply the science of listening to people's internal thoughts and emotions and recording commonalities?

Or to not understand that since its conception, psychiatry has had a proud and storied tradition of able-minded and able-bodied neurotypicals patronizing and infantilizing us and encoding their biases on our perspectives into diagnostic manuals that they then used to imprison, torture, and kill us and other marginalized people? And then to not recognize that doing so as a neurodivergent disabled person only aids and upholds that institution?

On the other hand, what kind of justifications does one have to make to themself to say "actually, this other part of this marginalized community is the only authority on this because they are the only ones really oppressed. It's definitely not circular logic to say that all of your claims of oppression are wrong because you're not oppressed and people who are not oppressed can't claim they're oppressed"?

Plenty of these anons have been so vague I don't even know what they're annoyed about. I know the aphobic one was about a microlabel (and a fairly well known one at that, so probably your average mogai-hater guy) but the others?

"Get help" so you endorse coercive enforcement of a consensus standard of normalcy even when the deviancy you so violently despise, in your own words, is merely annoying?

"I'm just concerned, you're out of touch with reality, spend less time online", somehow you managed to hit ableism, sanism, and some pretty wild assumptions about who I am as a person when you yourself admit you came from a random reblog of mine, all at once! Like truly, what gives you the gall to presume you know anything about my life?

I'd even be willing to extend good faith and say it's reasonable to assume honesty of everyone you meet on the internet. Even with that...

Do I buy my food at a farmer's market or a local employee owned chain grocery store or a supercorp and would that last option be out of ignorance, apathy, or living in a food desert? How often do I go to the local library, what do I do there, and do I get there by bus, uber, a friend driving me, or walking/biking?

What organizations do I volunteer with, and in what capacity/doing what tasks? If I tell you that I volunteer primarily in an online capacity, is it because I'm immunocompromised and no one masks at the physical locations anymore, because my doctor is refusing to provide a mobility aid that I desperately need, because public transport is sensory and chronic pain hell, because public transport here requires a four hour round trip just to get to the Walmart seven miles away, because the primary international org I support doesn't have US locations, because we're in a heat wave that is exponentially deadly to me due to my disabilities, or because I'm simply too sick to leave the house at all most days?

Who are my friends and family? When and where and how do I love them? How much time have I spent helping my incredible partner do the hard, hard work of learning to love herself and to heal, and how many infinities more would I pour into it? How often do I play fortnite with our best friend even though I DESPISE fortnite, just because I love him so much? How many times do I use most or all of my spoons for the day fighting executive dysfunction so I can read another of my best friend's amazing fics, sometimes for fandoms I'm not even in, just to leave comments to build them up?

(Is our landlord fucking us over because we're poor, trans, or disabled? Seriously, I'd like to know, because if it's either of the second, we could sue for damages and get the fuck outta here.)

I mean, that's just it. You don't know me, and I don't know how you can convince yourselves that you do enough to waste both our time being - well, an annoyance! Like, this is not a vent post, I've made those already, I just truly don't get it.

I mean, do you get some trivial satisfaction of feeling like you've done your social justice for the day by telling some random stranger that they're "insane"?

Does it make you feel superior to tell said stranger that they think non-aspec queers are "whores" for having sex, ignoring their near-CONSTANT aggressive posting about the importance of sex positivity and the harm of whorephobia, puritanism, culturally christian ideals of sex as "sinful", and how this impacts ace people, aro people, genderqueer people, and people of queer sexualities?

(Seriously, how do you act like you know me when ignoring my entire blog? Are you lost?)

Does it make you feel like a good little activist to tell disabled people to touch grass, and ignore every disabled person saying "uh, hey, you should consider the ableist intent behind that statement, or at the very least the ableist impact it has"?

Are you coming from a place of privilege or hurt? Or a mix of both? Are you someone who is not marginalized who is still dealing with genuine problems that aren't being listened to and addressed by the people in your life? Are you a marginalized person who is caught up in the conflation of privilege and oppression and evil, so you're too afraid to recognize your own privilege because that wouldn't be a morally neutral fact but evidence that you're an irredeemably bad person?

Are you a person with a mix of marginalized and nonmarginalized identities (white and trans, goy and plural, perisex and queer) who isn't able to get enough help with the harm you do face and is worried that you'll receive less help within your community if you're seen as an evil oppressor, not recognizing that there are people already receiving even less help and more hurt in your community due to the opposite?

People can say "it's not that complicated", but the truth is, people don't do things for no reason. They may not be self-aware enough to identify it, the people around them rarely have enough context to guess at it, but it's there.

It could be petty; they don't like us and want to make it our problem out of spite. "You wasted our time and made us moderately annoyed so we wanna do the same to you."

It could be out of some twisted sense of justice. Maybe they truly believe they're doing good. A lot of people do. Hell, I believe plenty of r//adfems actually believe they're fighting for women, and very few actually recognize the fascism in their own arguments, in the ones they ally with, or anything. It's a much more extreme example than some rando on tumblr, but the same could apply at a much smaller scale.

But is there some other motivation I'm missing?

I just - I've sent anons and non-anomymous asks when I didn't understand an argument being made for something. If I disagree with someone on something unimportant, I'll either leave it, reblog a joke about it, or block them if I find them annoying enough. If it's something important that they're approaching in good faith, which I assume to the extent of my ability to do so, I'll try to engage without being an asshole.

If it's important and they're engaging in bad faith, I may either reblog a rebuttal or make my own post, but I'll certainly block them - because what's the point in continuing to argue with someone whose goal is to undermine someone's personhood (or the fee things of similar weight) by any means necessary?

I just truly don't understand. Anyone's welcome to contribute to this, btw.

As an afterthought, this anon hate is bigoted, so I don't want to trivialize it. Ableism, sanism, and aphobia are still a big deal even when they are online microaggressions, not just because they cause harm but because these people exist offline and have a material effect on the physical (and medical/legal/social) world. Even the immediate harm is bad, though!

That being said, I want to recognize that I feel lucky (knock on wood) to not have gotten any of the really nasty shit again yet. I haven't seen any suicide baiting or "Keep Yourself Safe"s. I haven't been sent gore or death or rape threats or fantasies. I haven't had anyone tell me that I deserved the horrible traumas that I've been very open about, that I'm lying about being a survivor of things that are literally against T/OS to mention on here, or that they hoped my disabilities were terminal again.

It's uh, obviously coming from a place of trauma to have that as my baseline of "really bad". It's why I respond to anon asks to vent (via screenshotting), why I so vehemently defend the boundaries I set by blocking - not just that I have a right to, but am justified in doing so - why, when I get a fee asks like this in quick succession, and one mentions a reblog, my first thought is "how much worse is this gonna get?"

I know I'm making myself vulnerable by even talking about this. I guess I just hope if this doesn't get through to them, anyone who genuinely thinks this has even a lottery's chance of changing a random stranger's mind about anything will get over that. It's not "there's a tiny, one in a trillion chance". It's not even zero. By doing this, you are actively entrenching anyone, of any belief, further against yours. You are working counter to your own goals.

Hell, it's part of why I'm so block happy. I'm not trying to change the minds of the people I refute. I'm just trying to counter their misinformation, logical fallacies, and emotional manipulation to anyone else who may see the posts.

But also... consider maybe just... not. Sending rude anonymous asks to someone already so sensitized by horrific harassment campaigns that at best they'll block and vent about you and move on and at worst you'll trigger them. I mean, maybe that's the goal of some of you? But if so, why not come in guns blazing with the suibaiting? Why even pretend to be a good person to yourself?

Why?

I don't get it.

#the one by SAS was admittedly kinda funny #like. somehow I give less than zero shits about what they think and their ask only further solidified that #like if you're gonna act like my abuser of course I'm going to care about your opinions even less than hers #(and I care negative many about her opinions. but like... she's a family member so there's feeeeeelings wrapped up in that)#(you're nobody to me)#I refute their posts a lot because they're dangerous and sometimes even cruel #and admittedly I can be a bit of an asshole! lol. I can live with that #I also wonder if they're stalking me from an unblocked account what they think of me continuing to talk about them #are they like “you wouldn't say you didn't care so much if you actually didn't” because hun have you ever MET an autistic person #autistic people will repeatedly emphasize how much we don't give a shit #(somethinsomethin the trauma of people never believing that we're honest about our feelings+projecting onto us what they expect us to feel)#are they getting an ego boost from this?#if so hiiiii I'm always happy as a narcissist to give someone an ego boost even if I consider them a reprehensible human being #(I have NPD and if you're gonna be anableist ass about it gtfo)#(incoming norc orbuse anons in 3...2...)#anyway #stars out peace

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