this is sort of pathetic, but when you were younger, you were sort of puzzled by the cartoon representations of fathers: how a kid would be outside with a mitt, waiting to play catch.
it's not that your father never played catch with you, but you also didn't like when he did. something about a hard ball coming quickly towards your face doesn't seem exciting. not that you'd ever say you don't trust him. you trust him, right?
it's not like he never tried to teach you anything. or never tried to parent. on rare days, a strange person would walk in your father's skin. bright, happy, magnificent. this version of your father was so cheerful and charismatic that you would do anything to keep him. and this is the version of your father that would laugh and gently coax you try again. this is the version of your father that would break down the small elements of a problem and point them out so you have an easier time with them.
as a kid, those days happened more often. but somewhere around 11, you started being too much of a person, and he was often cross about it. when he'd try to sit you down to learn something, you spent the whole time with your shoulders around your ears, nervous, uncertain. terrified because you didn't immediately understand how to navigate something. worried you will run out of his goodwill and then you will have the Other Father back, and you will have ruined a good day for your entire family. something about you being visibly afraid - it just made him angry. he would accuse you of not wanting to learn and storm away.
on tv, it's not like there's a lot of versions of men-who-are-mostly-fathers. they can be good dads, but usually their stories are not told in the household. so it's normal that your father is there, but he's never around. you know he was in the house, somewhere, it's just not that you guys ever... "hung out". he just seemed to get kind of bored of you, annoyed you weren't made in his perfect image. frustrated with how much energy it took to raise a kid. over time, you kind of adopt a bittersweet band around your throat - he knows nothing about me. he says at least i never abandoned my family.
and it's technically - technically - true. he was there for you. sometimes he even made an effort and made it to the big moments; the graduations and the dance recitals. he grins and tells everyone that he taught you. it almost erases the days in between, where he complains because you need a ride to school. the weeks that go by where he doesn't actually ever speak to you. the times you say i am struggling and he says figure it out on your own. i can't help you.
and that's fine! that's all fine. you can call him if you are having a problem with your car. or if you need a ride to the hospital. he loves playing hero, he just doesn't like the actual work that comes with being a father. and you've kind of made your peace with that; because you had to, because you don't want to live your life like he does; the whole world at a managed distance, a little rotating and controlled orb he can witness and take credit for but never truly love.
as an adult, you are rewatching some dumb cartoon - and again, the child standing in the rain, with a mitt, waiting for their father to come play catch. as an adult, there's this strange creeping dread - this little thing? this little thing, and their dad can't even show up for that? oh god, holyshit, it's not about the mitt, is it. oh god, holyshit, your father spent most of your life leaving you hanging.
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Helluva ships - featuring Radioapple
Mammon does in fact tattle to Lucifer about Asmodeus and Fizz's relationship. Let's say the Helluva timeline lines up with Lucifer and Alastor getting closer sometime after season 1.
Lucifer doesn't know why Mammon bothered, even if Lucifer didn't have whatever was going on between him and Al -- he still wouldn't give a fuck. And he'd give even less of a fuck considering Mammon was still committing copyright infringement for his park, the audacity of that man was astronomical.
Still, Mammon calls a meeting to spill the tea because even he knows Lucifer is a hermit who does not keep up with the drama of Hell's so-called elite.
Asmosdeus finds out and therefore Blitzø finds out. So they all crash the meeting to give Mammon what-for. Fizz and Blitzø because they've never met Lucifer and think he's going to be pissed. Moxxie and Millie because Blitzø lied about where they were going and refused to let them leave. Stolas for moral support (and he's also never met the King, sue him, he's excited despite the circumstance) and Ozzie because he couldn't stop them so he might as well join them.
Following multiple very unnecessary pit-stops and shenanigans, they finally arrive at the palace---and it's too late.
Alastor has already kicked Mammon out and now he and Lucifer are doing paperwork, gossiping, and fighting over the (according to Alastor) tacky interior design of the palace.
The Helluva gang bust in (Blitzø is on a horse for some reason, he's very happy about this) and it's very anti-climatic.
Asmodeus: so you...don't care that I'm in love with an imp?
Lucifer, dad mode: You're in love? I'm so proud of you!
Blitzø: Just to be clear, I'm fucking this bird, there's nothing you can do about it
Lucifer: Okay??
Alastor: Darling, they think you care about hell's hierarchy
Lucifer: Oh! Yeah, uh-no. That'd be pretty hypocritical of me considering [gestures to Alastor]
The Helluva crew leave the palace once Lucifer and Alastor start bickering again looking like they've escaped a hurricane, wondering if they should be sending the King of Hell a 'Congratz on the Divorce' card.
Moxxie: ...does this mean we have two Kings now?
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i really adore how the fandom agrees bi-han would be a good father. he'd still be a dick, make mistakes, is a little too harsh with his children, but he doesn't want to put his kids what he went through as a child at the hands of bis father. Idk, i just really love that. it would be so easy to write him as a horrible father who doesn't care for his children, but this man would die and murder and kill and smile for his children in a heartbeat. they'll be great martial artists, trained from birth to break anyone's hip flexor, but they will also have a father who loves and cares for them.
it definitely doesn't come naturally to him tho. he wants to do this but it's kinda a whole new way of thinking for the man. bi-han isn't exactly one to open up or show any other feelings other than anger and mild annoyance- but eventually, with his never ending want to not be his father, and with the help of his partner, it's easier for him to really be the father he wants to be.
to hug his children, read them bed time stories, praise them when they've done well, praise them when they haven't done so well. not view his childrens' s emotions as weak. it's a huge mental adjustment for the cryomancer, but he does it.
also, I don't think he'd be set on "only having a son to pass on his legacy" idk, call me a woke liberal feminist (or a partner who'd beat his ass) but I don't think he particularly cares, he just wants a child or children who can eventually be the next grandmaster and uphold lin kuei principles.
catch this bitch having five daughters and obliterating the very being of a lin kuei lackey who he overheard talking negatively about his daughters. they will all be killing machines who love tea parties and watching my little pony, and he'll be right there with them (he knows the theme song by heart)
bi-han is a girl dad through and through and you cannot convince me otherwise.
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