#third consecutive day of being basically asleep the whole time

[kirby-the-gorb]

#kirby #transparent #daily kirby #my art #digital #hal laboratory #nintendo #third consecutive day of being basically asleep the whole time #I've set up to sort this out with the clinic cuz I'm not living like this for nothing #(also since I'm up north with my partner they're able to take care of me more than my wife has been with her Nightmare Contract) #(which helps. but this still sucks and I'm not doing it if I don't really genuinely have to) #(and I don't! so we're gonna fix it by god!)

[eligaxy]

Wind

☆ℜ𝔢𝔩𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔭 : Venti x gn!Reader

☆𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰 : near death experience, you’re confused asf about everything, bad writing cause i suck, spoilers for the we will be reunited quest!! And also for venti’s backstory, venti is serious for once (yes it’s a legitimate warning🤚)

☆𝔊𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢 : Some angst, some fluff? Idk bye🤨

☆𝔖𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶 : "It's okay, it's over now" he kneeled to be at your level, his arms still wrapped around you, and you didn't have the energy to fight your urge of nuzzling into him. "I'll always be here for you, wherever there is wind, remember I'm here too. You only need to ask." (2.8k words)

♪𝔑𝔬𝔱𝔢𝔰 : i’m an idiot simp, i did this in one sitting and half asleep, english isnt my first language BLA BLA IM SORRY FOR MY POOR WRITING BUT HAVE THIS

basically you don’t know if you can trust venti or not, head says no, heart screams yes

Also, I was listening to stormterror’s lair ost while writing it, just because its fucking amazing, you might wanna listen to it too

I’m nervous to post this?/&:! This is the second fic i’ve ever finished in my whole life

i love venti and he’s hot in his god outfit i don’t make the rules

KAY ENJOY <3

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

Saying you were exhausted would have been an understatement. After reuniting with your sibling, you had been frantically searching for clues about khaenri'ah and ways to Inazuma. With no luck, you couldn't find any traces of Dainsleif or of your twin. The ruins had been sealed and you had no idea what happened to the inverted statue or the corpse you had found there. Desperately, you clung into every little information you had, you would have turned every rock on this archon damned continent if you had to, which is what led you into those ruins near Guilli plains.

Walking along the destroyed buildings your eyes caught sight of a dandelion and you froze. You missed them so much, why couldn't they go back home with you? All you ever wanted was to be by their side why, why were they running away from you?

You remembered your travels, the moments you shared together, their protectiveness over you, the fondness in their eyes when you smiled at them. You remember the times you got hurt and healed one another with your now missing powers. You remember sleeping by their side and being grateful to the universe to let you keep your ray of sunshine everywhere with you. How ironic.

What had they meant 'once you reach the end of your journey' ? What does that even mean? Stupid twin, if they knew you were here the whole time, why hadn't they come to you? Why were they always leaving just when they were within your grasp? Why? Did they know how much you missed them and how much your heart broke when you finally saw them? Did they?

You only realized you were crying when a small gust of wind had your wet cheek react to the cold, breaking your train of thought. Wind.

The wind is everywhere, you think, free as a bird, always accompanying every citizen of this world, never truly alone. With this in mind, you resumed your exploring, slower this time.

A sigh escaped your mouth. You didn't want to admit it, but the wind did comfort you a little. Almost as if he was here. God of freedom and of the breeze, he was more a singer than a protector and you couldn't bear to think about him. Was it true? What Dain said... Did he destroy this nation? Was he the cause of the scenery that still haunted your nightmares up until 500 years later? Your brain simply couldn't accept that Venti, your Venti, you catch yourself thinking, could have made such an act of wrath. He was the epitome of freedom, why would he take the very thing he based all of his existence on from mere mortals? Barbatos simply couldn't be afraid of being overpowered, he didn't even care about power. All he wanted was freedom and happiness for his people. Surley this couldn't be right?

But then again, who were you to deny the wipe out of an entire nation? The gods did it. They were afraid that Celestia would be overthrown by the pride of humankind, the destruction of khaenri'ah by divine beings was a fact. There was no misunderstanding about this. That was the one thing you were sure of. So why did you feel like crying even more now?

The mere thought of a gentle soul such as Venti committing innocent people to an eternity of suffering didn't sit right with you. Even when his dearest friend Dvalin had turned against him, he didn't try to stop him, didn't even ask the dragon to save him. He healed and helped him, gave him a choice.

'What is freedom if demanded of you by a god?' was the same person that asked this question the same one who committed mass murder? Genocide?

Did the little wine-lover bard you had grown fond of destroy all hopes and light your kin had?

You remember that night when he freed Stanley from his burden, freed his and his friends' spirits. You had marveled at his action, in that instant he was a god, and he definitely hadn't struck you as a murderer. You remember that look of silent pain and grief in his eyes when he sang the tales of the nameless bard he had taken the appearance of. You knew he trusted you enough to share his story, something so personal, you could almost feel the war that took down the tyrant of Mond. Oh how much you cherished that evening, treating him to some well deserved dandelion wine afterwards, his favorite, and asking him to sing you more about the time where was nothing but the spirit of a breeze.

Your heart broke a little, remembering his rosy cheeks and drunk smile, you wish you could talk to him, ask him what happened. What did he do, was he really as dangerous as you had been told? If so, then why did you feel so good around him? Why did you feel like you could give hi-

You stopped walking upon seeing a ruin guard up ahead in the distance. You're so stupid, you think. Feeling this way is not gonna get you anywhere, especially with how the bard had been missing for a few weeks now. Ever since you had last seen your sibling.

Where was he, where was he wandering off to? You walk towards the disabled ruin guard, not really paying any mind to it, still thinking about the god you longed to meet with. If you could see him, what would you even say? Would he even answer your questions? Why did your stomach feel so light and funny when you thought about seeing him, why aren't you angrier?

You're almost at the killing machine's level now, so lost in your thought you don't notice the five other similar robots hidden behind a wall next to it. You notice them only when it's too late and you've already turned them on while thinking about examining them and collecting their serial numbers. When you hear the familiar tick of the mechanism turning on, you internally panic and think about running away only to calm down moments later and think to yourself that you can simply beat it and take what you came here for. Even if you are emotionally and physically tired, you can manage, you think.

That was before hearing five other consecutive ticks right after it, and all around you.

Turning around, your gaze falls upon the small army of field tillers. Fuck.

Paimon wasn't with you today, you had asked for some time alone which she hesitantly accepted, so you couldn't ask her to go fetch help. You would have been worried if you had all your capacities but with the state you were in, you were wondering how you were going to survive this fight. You were alone, none of your companions with you, and deeply weakened by the busy day you had and the few hours of sleep you had managed to steal away from the night. Was it today you would meet your doom, with all your questions and uncertainties unanswered?

You tried your best to fight with the strength you had left, but quickly grew desperate after what felt like hours of efforts to swing your blade and being able to only take one monster down out of the six. It didn't help that you got injured along the way, their blows becoming harder and harder to dodge. After being thrown on the grown for the third time, you understood you had at least two broken ribs and that your shaking legs would soon fail you as well.

Fear crept upon you, you would die here today, alone. Alone. You couldn't talk to your sibling after all, couldn't understand. You didn't even get to talk to him one last time. Him... You would die without the knowledge of the truth about your bard. You would die alone. You didn't want that, you couldn't look death straight in the eye.

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

-

In Mondstadt, there was a musician, a weird singer everyone had heard about at least once. He lived off of his songs and was mostly known for having a great story-telling and being an alcoholic.

The number of people who knew the true nature of his identity were few and he was perfectly content with that. He didn't wish to be a god anymore, his gnosis had been taken away anyway and it's not like he had any power over the city of wind nowadays. Even if his people still worshipped him as Barbatos, it didn't sit right with him to be called a god anymore. It actually never did, he thinks to himself with a smile, he never really took any responsibilities that came with the divine title which is why he was so weak today. But it didn't matter to him, his smile turns into a soft giggle.

Sitting on a mill that was once born from his steps he looks fondly over the city he founded. Even if they were godless, the citizens were still thriving and free. He cared oh so very deeply about the place even if he rarely, if not never, showed the affection within his heart. He remembers the day he grew strong enough to dispel the storms over his actual Mondstadt, and made the weather gentle enough so that there was no need for fireplaces. Nowadays, he loves watching birds nest into the chimney tops and seeing them found their own home. It gave him a sense of belonging like no other, not above his people, but walking among them and watching them nest into this cocoon he created. He was proud of what happened to his land and would do it all over again if he had to.

Especially since it led to him meeting you. This thought doesn't catch him off guard, you often roamed around in his mind after all, and it's not like he didn't write at least three songs about you and your feat, your smile, your courage...

Ah there he goes again, rambling about you in a whisper. He turns around to the statue of him his people erected in his honor, chuckling at how they never made the connection with his signature braids. His, but not really his, since he had stolen this form from someone who was much more deserving of this power than him. Seeing his friend being honored with the statues of the seven around the land made him happy, he hoped that it was a good enough thank you gift in return for everything that the bard whom he couldn't even remember the name of anymore did for him.

Upon gazing at the statue, he remembered telling you of his long gone friend. It was the first time he had talked about him to someone else, he didn't even mention it to Venessa, she who made him believe in himself again. He could ask himself why, but he simply knew that you had something different, more than meets the eye. Perhaps it was because you weren't from Teyvat, or perhaps it was just you being as simple as your natural self but he was simply and utterly captivated by your being. You inspired him to no end, at first he thought it was because he had never met someone like you and he loved new things! But as time grew and he got to know you, he understood quickly the meaning and depth of his passions. He thought of it with a light chuckle, content with your presence alone. He really did need and want you around.

So why did he purposely avoid you like the plague?

The wind had brought to his ears that you had met with Dainsleif.

And your twin.

His first reaction was to search for you, talk to you, he wanted to be here to know what happened! You had searched so long, he couldn't contain himself, still listening to what the wind told him, he started running with excitement but... But wait, Dainsleif was... He told you what?

Oh.

So you heard about Khaenri'ah. He had stopped dead in his tracks and turned back, only sending a warm current of wind your way, hugging you from afar.

He wasn't ready to talk about this yet, not ready to face you and absolutely not ready to answer your questions. He was a coward, he thought, running away like that but what else could he do, really. It was only natural for him to be as uncatchable as air.

A sorry excuse to avoid the fact that even if his past had marvelous story like the one of the nameless bard, it also had its share of darkness, something he wasn't ready to dive back into. Especially not now when your arrival has been shaking this world up like it hasn't been since at least 500 years.

But oh, how he longed to see your face or to hear your voice. So he asked a breeze to report to him what you were up to, and where you were. Just in case! he tells himself, what if you needed help ehe? But he knows you're competent and you won't need the help of a weakling coward like him anytime soon. Or so he thought.

Because when the breeze only gives him a few words back, his blood runs cold.

"Please, anybody... Just help me."

-

As you murmured these words in your desperate state, not really for anyone but yourself as a last resort, a prayer of some sort, you tried to stand by leaning yourself on your sword and failing miserably. You didn't dare look up as you heard the loud footsteps of the metal giants coming your way. It was over, and you barely managed to accept it.

As you rested your forehead against the cold handle of your sword, you closed your eyes, tears starting to make their ways out of your closed eyelids. All you could feel was remorse.

A soft breeze moved your hair slightly and your chest felt like a black hole had taken place where your heart used to be, regretting to not have been able to meet him under the tree at Windrise one last time.

The breeze quickly grew stronger, until it felt unnatural and you looked up from the ground, only to close your eyes again immediately when you realized the wind was too powerful for you to keep them open. If you had struggled to see though, you would have been blinded by the white light that soon illuminated the whole ruins. You didn't have enough time to register the situation when you felt a hand being laid atop your shoulder, snaking around your collarbones and pulling you back into... nothing? Another arm circled your weak form and a voice you immediately recognized said

"I've dealt with things worse than you, now crumble."

You realized that if you couldn't feel a chest behind you while still being embraced by his arms, it was because he was floating above you, and not standing behind you. A look in his direction confirmed your suspicions but what stunned you wasn't the fact that he was flying, but the attire he wore. Barely covering his body, a white set made of materials that seemed like clouds and liquid gold contrasted perfectly with his regular green clothes. His hair was glowing green and his eyes that were focused on the ruin guards up ahead had a marvelous shine that you had never seen before. He had that same aura he did the night he freed Stanley, but there was also something different about the way his hands gripped you a little too tightly or the way his voice sounded.

"Venti.." You muttered his name, relief and affection flooding you all at once, in his presence you felt as if nothing bad could happen to you. How foolish could you be, just a few hours ago you were speculating wether or not he had wiped out an entire civilisation and now here you were, being saved by him and feeling safer than you had in months.

"Close your eyes, I don't want give you a headache" he said, slowly floating legs first towards the ground. His unusually serious voice surprised you (and him) but you did as he told you. Letting go of your sword and leaning back into him, you let him deal with the monsters ahead of you.

"It's okay, it's over now" he kneeled to be at your level, his arms still wrapped around you, and you didn't have the energy to fight your urge of nuzzling into him. "I'll always be here for you, wherever there is wind, remember I'm here too. You only need to ask."

Being protected by a god really didn't feel that bad. Especially when you were in love with said god.

✧ ✧ ✧ ✧ ✧

Thank you so much for reading whatever this is until the end :’)

Don’t hesitate to comment or reblog, tysm <3

Ps: venti loves u and so do i do pls take care of urself mwah

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact #genshin impact angst #genshin impact scenario #venti x reader #venti x traveler #venti x lumine #venti x aether #el writes♡

[narutogwriting]

A Kunai is Not a Knife

⋇✦ Pairing

Kakashi Hatake x Reader

⋇✦ Genre

fluff; one shot

⋇✦ CW

none

⋇✦ Length

1.6k

⋇✦ Request by @kakashiswilloffire : can I request kakashi or shikamaru trying and failing to cook dinner for a gn!reader? like never used a knife that wasn't a kunai but wants to do something nice for their partner?

Kakashi was a more than capable shinobi. Son of the white fang, he was a legend in his own right. Being one of the youngest ninja to graduate the academy at age five, he went on to become a chunin at just age six. By the time of the third ninja war, Kakashi was a jonin, trusted to lead his own team.

He was Kakashi of the Sharingan, the copy cat ninja. Kakashi joined the ANBU, was the third Hokage’s right hand man for a time, and feared across the nations.

He was strong, he was intelligent, he was good with a kunai.

But for the life of him, Kakashi could not use a food knife.

“Shit shit shit,” he cursed, shoving his now bleeding thumb in his mouth, tasting the metallic on his tongue.

With his free hand, he grabbed the remote, pausing the cooking show he was watching that was attempting to teach him how to make dinner. It was a little out of his league as a person that survived mostly on takeout, but Kakashi had been optimistic and confident in his abilities.

Because really, how hard could cooking be?

And yes, okay, he absolutely could activate his sharingan, watch the cooking show--memorizing every meticulous movement of the chef on the television--and prepare the most decadent meal you’d ever tasted all from the comfort of your home.

But at this point, it was a matter of pride.

Kakashi was a grown man. He could cook dinner for his girlfriend. It really shouldn’t be this hard.

That’s what he told himself as he sucked on his stinging thumb. He’d tried to chop the vegetables as quickly and diligently as the chef had done and subsequently cut into his finger. Luckily it was a superficial injury, something he would forget about in the next ten minutes, but the point stood that there was no reason he should be so *bad at this.

It was a knife for god’s sake; Kakashi was basically born holding one. Given they were different tools for very different purposes, but when it came down to it, a knife was a knife. Or so he thought.

Sighing, Kakashi glanced at the clock. You’d be off your shift soon and then heading home. It was your ninth consecutive shift at the hospital. A small factory fire left many injured--thankfully not fatally--and so you had been putting in overtime to make sure the patients were taken care of and your coworkers were not left stranded without help.

You took your work very seriously, and Kakashi loved and appreciated that about you. You were such a hard worker, and it made Kakashi proud to call you his. But as such, you’d been obviously exhausted, spending all your time home asleep, and Kakashi was sure you weren’t taking adequate enough breaks to nourish yourself properly.

He just wanted to do something nice for you. Coming home to a nice home cooked meal and a warm bath waiting seemed like the perfect way to kick off the four days off you had coming your way.

“Alright, Kakashi. You can do this…” He muttered in an attempt to hype himself up. He picked up the aforementioned tool from hell, taking it to the sink to sanitize it of his blood.

He turned back to the onions then, pressing play on the tv and trying to dice them into tiny pieces just like the chef was doing so easily. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get them into small enough pieces. He knew you loved the taste onions provided, but didn’t like the sensation of chewing them.

It was a weird thing you were particular about, something so small it would be easy to pass over and forget about, but Kakashi knew everything about you, noticed every small quirk and committed it to memory.

Like the way you would read a book, and if a character winked, you winked instinctively as well. If someone came up and startled you, you would yell “ow” even though you weren’t hurt. You had a dimple only in your left cheek, and the only time it was visible was when you were especially happy, and when you were anxious, you’d swipe your fingers over your lips.

Kakashi noticed and loved everything about you.

Which was why he needed this damn onions to just *get smaller.* They were too big, you’d definitely taste them, and it would ruin the whole meal! He was determined to get them just tiny enough to taste without having to chew them.

“Could I juice them…?” Kakashi wondered to himself as he tossed the horrid knife on the counter in annoyance. Maybe squeezing the onions really tightly over the meal would add enough flavor.

Deciding he’d get back to those later, he grabbed another knife and pulled a pomegranate from the fridge. Kakashi never actually had a pomegranate before, and he’d only seen you eat one once or twice.

You had a thing about pomegranates; they were your favorite fruits, but you would only eat them on special occasions as a way to reward yourself--just another one of your little quirks.

So Kakashi was going to cut one open and get all the juicy seeds in a bowl for you as a special treat.

Unfortunately, because Kakshi didn’t eat pomegranates on his own and didn’t see you eat them often enough, he had no idea just how messy they could really be.

*Screw the knife,* Kakashi decided to himself. *I’m a shinobi. I can do this without that stupid thing.*

So Kakashi, in all his *genius, pulled his Kunai from his leg strap. They used to play games like this in the academy; they called it fruit ninja. The goal was to slice a fruit in the air with your kunai as concisely as possible.

Kakashi always won.

He tossed the pomegranate high in the air, ready to dice the fruit and have it up for serving. Quick as a flash of lightning, the Kunai struck through the juicy pomegranate, promptly causing it to *explode--juices and seeds and all.

And what was also unfortunate was Kakashi was moving so quickly, already prepared to slice the fruit, that his hand moved faster than his brain, and he sliced at the pomegranate three more times before he could stop himself.

Juices and seeds splattered the entire kitchen covering the counters, the cupboards, the floors, and Kakashi.

You walked in at that moment, greeted with what appeared to be a murder scene with a defeated Kakashi standing in the middle of it.

You stared in quiet shock for a moment as you took in Kakashi’s expression. You’d never seen him look so forlorn in your life. His arms were hanging idly at his side, the kunai slipping from his grasp as it clanked against the floor.

You couldn’t help it; you laughed.

Kakashi startled, eye’s flickering to you in a panic.

“Y-you’re home!” He stuttered out. “You’re early! I thought you’d be another hour or so… I was just…” He looked helplessly around the disastrous kitchen. “Just trying to make you dinner.” Kakashi sighed, closing his eyes and shaking his head, disappointed with himself.

When you laughed again, he peeked one eye open, shooting a small glare in your direction. “I’m so glad you’re taking pleasure in my suffering…” He muttered dramatically.

Rolling your eyes, you sauntered over to Kakashi, throwing your arms around his neck as you grinned up at him. “You know, I’m a little relieved,” you teased him with a smile. “I thought that you were good at *everything. It’s nice to know you have your flaws, too.”

Behind his mask, you could practically see Kakashi’s pout.

Placing a kiss on his cheek, you pulled back to survey the damage. “I’m sorry; I have to ask… I know pomegranates are messy, but what the hell happened here?”

With a groan, Kakashi shook his head, finally moving to grab a rag. “I… I played fruit ninja with the pomegranate.”

“You… what?”

“I played fruit ninja. With the pomegranate.”

“What does that mean?”

“I threw the pomegranate.”

“You threw the pomegranate?”

“I threw the pomegranate. Then I sliced it.”

“With your kunai?”

“With my kunai.”

“You threw the pomegranate and then you sliced it with your kunai?”

“That’s correct.”

You once again burst into laughter. You couldn’t help it! The whole idea was so ridiculous and especially coming from Kakashi.

He groaned again before you wrapped your arms around him. Reluctantly, he returned the gesture. “That’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever tried to do for me.” You giggled. “Now… Can you teach me how to play?”

And so that’s how the rest of your night went. It wasn’t the way Kakashi had planned for the night to go, but it was one to remember just the same. Instead of a romantic dinner and relaxing bath, the two of you made an even bigger mess in the kitchen, slicing all the fruit you could manage.

You did your best to teach Kakashi to slice and season food with a regular knife. Boiling the water was about the only thing he *didn’t mess up, but it was endearing.

Later, bellies full, laying in bed, leaving the kitchen to be cleaned tomorrow, you cuddled comfortably into Kakashi’s side, placing light kisses on his shoulder as you drifted off to sleep. Kakashi held you tightly in his arms, content. He was a capable shinobi, a legend in his own right. His accomplishments listed on and on. He couldn’t cook for shit, but he made up for it by loving you.

#naruto #naruto x reader #naruto x oc #naruto one shot #naruto oneshot #naruto imagine #naruto imagines #naruto hc #naruto headcanon #naruto headcanons #naruto ff #naruto fanfiction #naruto drabble #naruto drabbles #kakashi x reader #kakashi x oc #kakashi one shot #kakashi oneshot #kakashi imagine #kakashi imagines #kakashi hc #kakashi headcanon #kakashi headcanons #kakashi ff #kakashi fanfiction #kakashin drabble #kakashi drabbles #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi hatake x oc #kakashi hatake oneshot

[jaemtens]

The Canned Genie

monsta x| kihyuk | side jookyun | 11.5k | ao3

summary:  Lee Minhyuk was just making dinner when he ends up with a genie that he didn’t ask for. Yoo Kihyun was just chilling in his “lamp” when he ends up with several headaches that he didn’t ask for.

☆ The First Wish ☆

Minhyuk dropped his backpack on the ground and dramatically collapsed on his rickety bed.

He should eat, he thought to himself.

Long ago, he was sure that the bed frame would iminently give out, folding on itself while he was sleeping on it. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do if that happened -- sleep on the floor? That’s not the worst, right? A few days passed, and he was pretty sure he was in the clear. His bed was just rickety and old, even if it was comfy and, um, well-used. He could definitely fall asleep right now. Minhyuk rolled to his side, hugging his blanket and burying his face into it. It was so warm; yup, he could fall asleep right now if he wanted to.

He really should eat, he thought again.

Minhyuk was so tired. Beyond tired. Exhausted? Yeah, exhausted was the word. Today, he had to work the early-morning shift at the convenience store before heading to his night lecture for Quantitative Chemistry aka Quant aka Hell On Earth. Yeah, yeah, he knew that choosing chemistry as his major was definitely not the easy way out. He knew that every waking moment of his four-year degree was going to be hard. But, even if your average Biology or Pre-Medical major Suffered (yes, Suffered, not suffered. Just ask a biology major about organic chemistry and you’ll know why) through every chemistry class, Minhyuk took most of them in stride. Quant was a whole ‘nother level, and his brain ached just thinking about the class. He didn’t know how he made it through today’s lecture, and he certainly didn’t remember dragging himself through the dark streets back to his apartment building.

Just get up and eat, you lard! he chided himself.

He finally acquiesced to his conscience. With a prolonged groan, Minhyuk rolled off his bed, his gangly limbs steadying the sleep-deprived college student. His eyes were barely open, the light streaming from the incandescent bulb above him too much to handle right now. Minhyuk dragged himself to the kitchen, nearly tripping on his bag along the way. God, he was a mess.

Look, he wasn’t usually a mess, okay? Just after Quant. And Inorganic. And -- never mind.

Just how was Minhyuk so perpetually tired?

Well, first, he was a college student. An unhealthy dose of exhaustion was the name of the game. Bonus tired points because he was a chemistry major, a department in which the professors literally did not care if you slept or not. Suffering (yes, Suffering!) was widespread in his major. And Minhyuk? Well, he was basically an academic masochist. Just ask the nuclear magnetic resonance spectrographs scattered all over his desk.

Second, he worked. It wasn’t a good job. It wasn’t even a job he liked. It was a dead-end retail job at a convenience store. But, let’s face it. Who’s going to hire a broke underclassmen chemistry major with literally no work experience? A convenience store, that’s who. Unfortunately, that wiped out most of Minhyuk’s free time.

Third, Minhyuk was the type of person to sleep whenever he could. His sleep schedule oscillated wildly between consecutive all-nighters to, like, 36 hours of sleep straight. Okay, not quite straight, but laying in bed and hiding under your covers while technically awake is not really awake, right? Minhyuk took naps everywhere and anywhere. Altogether, he was pretty sure his sleep schedule was screwed up beyond saving.

Fortunately for sleepy Minhyuk, his kitchen was really close to his bed. The upside to a closet-sized apartment? Is his studio even a real apartment? Still half-awake, Minhyuk opened one of the cupboards and sighed at how hopelessly empty it was. He really needed to get more stuff from the convenience store... Or steal more free food from campus. Grocery stores were too expensive. Who has money for fruit in this economy? Minhyuk reached for his last can of chicken noodle soup and fished out his hand-me-down can opener from one of the drawers. He latched the can opener’s teeth on the can of soup and clenched down hard on the handles, perforating the can on one edge.

Without any further warning, the top of the can practically exploded off, and a plume of lavender-white smoke swirled up from the can. The smoke enveloped his small kitchen, but it left as soon as it had appeared. In its place was an empty can of ‘soup,’ and a boy who looked like he couldn’t be much older than him.

Oh, and the boy was floating.

“I must be hallucinating,” Minhyuk murmured, rubbing his eyes. That was the only reasonable explanation; he was so tired that he was hallucinating. God, he really should’ve just stayed in bed. This is what happens when you shun sleep. Never give up on sleep, kids.

The floating boy rolled his eyes. “No, you’re not,” he emphatically replied. “Name’s Kihyun, I’m a genie, and you get five wishes.”

“What?”

Kihyun sighed. “My name is Yoo Kihyun. I’m a genie, and I grant wishes... Anything you want, really. You get five wishes.”

The hallucination -- Kihyun, his tripped-out brain corrected -- seemed pretty serious for being, you know, completely fake.

“I wish I had another can of soup,” Minhyuk deadpanned, rubbing his eyes again. What a weird dream.

Kihyun rolled his eyes again. Minhyuk swore he heard the boy mutter something under his breath, but, without missing a beat, Kihyun snapped his fingers. Another puff of lavender smoke appeared on his kitchen counter, quickly dissipating to reveal an exact replica of the empty can of chicken noodle soup that Kihyun came from. This new one was sealed, unlike the empty one next to it. Minhyuk looked back over at Kihyun, who acted like this was totally and completely normal.

“Four wishes,” Kihyun dryly said.

Okay, this was a little much for a hallucination… maybe he was dreaming? Minhyuk tried to wake himself up a little, studying all of Kihyun’s features. Even though he was hovering a few inches off the ground, Minhyuk could tell that Kihyun was a few inches shorter than him. He had light brown hair that was boyishly combed down over his forehead. His features were remarkably sharp with strong cheekbones and a strong jawline. His eyes were small and narrow, but his lips and nose were larger. He had small unremarkable earrings in each ear and a blinged-out ring on his right hand, but otherwise he was dressed in plain business casual: a white collared shirt and black pants.

This was oddly specific for a dream. Minhyuk was really tired, though -- maybe he had actually passed out? Kihyun was starting to look impatient. Would he really have dreamed this up? He remembered reading somewhere that your most vivid dreams occurred when you were the most tired. And, well, he was really tired when he got home.

“So…” Minhyuk slowly started. “You’re a genie?”

“That’s what I said, didn’t I?” Kihyun retorted. He seemed disinterested, like Minhyuk was probably the most boring thing in his genie-life right now.

“And you grant wishes?”

“Yup,” Kihyun dismissively answered. “If you wish for anything, I’ll make it come true.”

“And you just wasted your first wish on a can of soup,” he added, disdain evident in his voice. Compared to Minhyuk’s low, nasally voice, Kihyun had a high-pitched tone that sounded like a cross between a sassy gay boy and an annoyed younger sibling. It was almost endearing?

“Well, can I get a do-over on that wish?”

“There aren’t any do-overs for wishes,” Kihyun harshly replied.

“Can I wish for more wishes then?”

“No!”

“Oh.”

So, turns out that you can’t wish for more wishes. What a joke. Kihyun said he could wish for anything, doesn’t that mean he can wish for more wishes?

Minhyuk looked back over at the can of soup on his counter. “Why… why were you in a can of soup? I thought genies came in lamps?”

Kihyun sighed. “Look, how many magic lamps have you seen, like, ever?”

“Mmm,” Minhyuk paused, thinking out loud. “None?”

“Exactly. So we have to get creative.”

“But… a can of soup?”

“Okay, first off, it’s a lot bigger than it looks. Quite roomy, actually. But you wouldn’t know since you’re just a boring old human.”

“And… you’re a genie.”

“Ohmygod, yes! Yes, I’m a genie! How many times do I have to tell you?”

“Okay, okay, you’re a genie,” Minhyuk tacitly agreed. “And you do genie things like grant wishes.”

“Yes.”

“And live in soup cans.”

“Listen here, you little shit,” Kihyun threatened, his eyes fierce and staring directly at Minhyuk’s eyes now; Kihyun definitely had a temper. “With a snap of my fingers I can banish you to another dimension. Or I can shrink you down to the size of an ant. Or I can turn you into an actual ant. Point is, I have more magic in one finger than you can even dream up in your wildest nightmares.”

Kihyun sure was awfully angry. Or annoyed. He couldn’t tell for sure, but Kihyun seemed upset for someone who had just been released from, well, a can of soup.

“Isn’t it, like, against the genie rules to hurt the person who summoned you?”

Kihyun sighed again. He seemed to do that a lot? He was clearly still annoyed.

“Yes,” he belatedly admitted. “But that doesn’t mean that the second you finish your fifth wish--”

“--Don’t you just go back into the soup can?”

“Why are you so annoying!”

“Because this is definitely a dream,” Minhyuk argued. “Or a nightmare, I guess.”

“No, I can assure you that this is very much real, that you’re awake. If anyone’s having a nightmare, it’s me.”

“Oh come on, I’m not that bad,” Minhyuk protested. Just then, his stomach growled in hunger. He blushed a little -- he still hadn’t eaten.

“Anyways, you don’t get hungry in dreams.”

“Uh huh,” Minhyuk dismissed. Kihyun did have a point: you don’t usually get hungry in dreams. And they usually aren’t this… realistic. He was really hungry. And Kihyun seemed really… real. “You don’t mind if I, uh…” he added, motioning toward the can of soup that Kihyun had conjured up for him.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Kihyun replied, rolling his eyes again. Minhyuk just smiled in response as he cracked open the new can and poured it into a bowl. He threw it in the microwave and let it cook.

“I hope you, like, made this correctly.”

“I can assure you that it’s just as salty, preservative-filled, and unhealthy as every other can of chicken noodle soup.”

“Great,” Minhyuk feigned. “Just the way I like it.”

“You still haven’t told me your name.”

“Oh.” Minhyuk was too sleepy to be embarrassed. “That’s because I thought you weren’t real.”

“GENIES ARE REAL!”

Minhyuk just laughed in response. “My name’s Lee Minhyuk.”

“Well, okay, Minhyuk,” Kihyun started, “You live in a dump. These kitchen appliances look like they’re from 1962. Your cupboards? 1942. There’s no furniture in this place except for your desk, which, by the way, is covered in crap so you can’t even see the desk. Your walls and ceiling are peeling in at least five places, and I can only imagine what your bedroom looks like. Not to mention that you have no food, no tableware, and no proper cutlery.”

“Um,” Minhyuk demurred, sheepishly scratching his neck while looking around his place. “First, I don’t have a bedroom. Studio and all. Second, I wasn’t exactly planning on having visitors tonight, you know?”

Kihyun didn’t really seem satisfied with that answer, but at this hour? That was the best he was going to get.

“You can, uh, make yourself at home, I guess?” he added.

“Trust me, there’s nothing that you can do to this apartment to make it more homey.”

“You’re right, I can’t make it look like the inside of a soup can,” Minhyuk replied, giggling as he watched Kihyun’s expression sour.

“Why you little--”

The microwave beeped, signaling that his soup was done. Minhyuk stopped giggling and grabbed his tupperware bowl from the microwave with a hand-towel. He cradled the soup in one hand with the towel whilst using his free hand to find a plastic spork for slurping the noodles.

“You were saying?”

Kihyun sighed and rolled his eyes at the same time. Minhyuk wondered if that was an improvement?

“Aren’t you going to make another wish?”

Oh, yeah, the whole genie bit.

“Hmm, well I think I need some time to think about it,” Minhyuk countered before blowing on a sporkful of noodles and stuffing it in his mouth.

“Did me listing all the things that were wrong about your apartment not help?”

“Nope~” Minhyuk replied with a smile.

☆ The Second Wish ☆

Minhyuk’s eyes fluttered open when the sunlight just started to assault his eyes through his apartment’s lone window. Everything was really freaking bright, so he barely cracked his eyes open; he shuffled in his bed, rolling around to face the rest of the room. Everything looked normal? Normal-ish, at least. He lifted his upper body up and sitting -- well, float-sitting (is that the right word for that?) -- near the foot of his bed and looking totally unamused was none other than Yoo Kihyun. He was unchanged from last night, except he had an unimpressed look and a hand on his chin like he had been watching Minhyuk sleeping for… hours? Hours. Minhyuk’s eyes got real wide and he pulled his covers up over his bare chest.

“What are you doing in here?” he groggily stammered out, still in shock that Kihyun would desecrate the sanctimony of his bedroom-slash-living room. And surely he knew that Kihyun was going to say something about the state of his room soon enough.

“The genie equivalent of watching grass grow,” Kihyun deadpanned, still not moving his hand from his face. “Except for us it’s watching humans sleep.”

“Wait, what?” Minhyuk complained. “Don’t you have, like, genie things to go do?”

“Oh, I would love to be doing literally anything else right now, Minhyuk. But, unfortunately for me, I’m stuck with you until you use all of your wishes. And, even more unfortunately for me, you are a very boring person who doesn’t wish for things quickly. So here I am, watching grass grow.”

Minhyuk let his covers fall back down after realizing that, no, Kihyun was not going to kill him. Though, he still had at least one question nagging at him.

“Couldn’t you, like, do something? Anything? Other than watch me.”

Kihyun sighed. “I would do literally anything else, but, again, you’re a boring person who has literally nothing of interest in this shoebox of an apartment.”

“Right.” Minhyuk feigned agreement, still trying to wake up. “Sorry, I’m still really tired.”

“Well, it’s not like you’ve got a genie who could instantly solve that problem for you,” Kihyun wryly commented, perking up a little. “You could wish for a comfier bed? Fluffier pillows? Warmer covers? Or how about a fully-furnished apartment? Or a larger apartment? Or you could skip the whole apartment and wish to be fully-rested every day?”

Kihyun seemed really excited about the prospect of Minhyuk using up another wish. But why would he want to? He just got up; shouldn’t he, like, fully think this through? Kihyun probably just wanted him to wish for stuff so that he could go back in his soup can and do whatever genies do. Yeah, Minhyuk was pretty sure that whatever Kihyun wanted to do was probably more important than granting his wishes, but honestly? Kihyun was pretty cute and he wasn’t gonna pass up the opportunity to have a cute magical boy follow him around for a few days, even if it came at Kihyun’s expense.

“I want -- not wish for -- some privacy while I shower and get ready,” Minhyuk calmly said, walking to his micro-sized bathroom wearing nothing but sweats. Kihyun’s expression darkened when he realized that, no, Minhyuk was not going to get this over with quickly.

“Trust me, I do not want to see you naked.”

“Nope, you just want to watch me sleep,” Minhyuk joked with a smile before shutting the door to the bathroom. He wanted nothing more than to see Kihyun’s facial expression change in response to that comment, but he needed to get ready; his first class started in an hour, and it took him twenty minutes to get to campus. He started the shower and looked at himself in the mirror. His black hair was messy and all over the place, but he didn’t really care. Bedhead was pretty normal for him. You know, a common side effect of excessive sleeping. While the shower was warming up, he brushed his teeth and picked out a towel to sling over the shower rod. Minhyuk undressed and stepped into the nearly-scalding water.

What did he want to wish for? Every time his mind turned to his remaining four wishes, everything just went… blank? Like, sure his life wasn’t perfect. Kihyun was right, his apartment was kind of a dump, and he didn’t have much food in his kitchen, and he was always tired. But he couldn’t imagine his life any other way. If he just wished away one of his problems -- or even most of them -- new problems would just take their place. Minhyuk wanted things, sure, but he wanted things that you couldn’t just put into words, that you couldn’t just conjure up, that you couldn’t just wish for. It wasn’t that simple.

He just had to figure those things out.

After lathering himself and throwing some shampoo in his unwieldy hair, Minhyuk rinsed himself off, stopped the water, and dried himself with his towel. He tied his towel around his waist and stepped back into the bedroom to put together an outfit and to find out what sassmaster-genie Kihyun had prepared in past five minutes.

“You know, you really should be nice to your genie. I can pervert all of your wishes to their worst possible meaning.”

“Uh huh,” Minhyuk dismissed, searching his closet for something to wear.

“Aren’t you going to wish for something? I’m sure you thought of something in the shower. Lots of shower thoughts, right?”

“Were you imagining me in the shower?” Minhyuk asked.

“No,” Kihyun flatly replied.

“Do you want me to wish that you were thinking about that?”

“Look--”

“--Besides, how would genies even, like, know what goes on in the shower? Do genies even shower?”

Kihyun didn’t have an answer for that one. He licked his lips while his eyes darted around shiftily; Minhyuk was satisfied.

“I didn’t sign up for this,” he finally complained.

“I didn’t either,” Minhyuk added before disappearing back in the bathroom to change.

“So are you going to come with me to class today?” he shouted through the door.

“Unfortunately,” Kihyun replied, also shouting.

“Okay, well I have--”

“--Organic chemistry lab, I know.”

What? How did Kihyun--

“You had your class schedule on your desk,” Kihyun mentioned. “And your lab. You screwed up #4, by the way. You’re welcome.”

“You fixed it!?”

“I wasn’t gonna leave it wrong, Minhyuk.”

“H-how do you even know organic chemistry?”

“Minhyuk, I’ve been doing this genie thing since before organic chemistry was even a thing.”

He threw on his hoodie and exited the bathroom.

“Why would anyone even willingly learn organic chemistry,” he mused in full earshot of Kihyun. He went straight to kitchen, and he could feel Kihyun’s floaty presence follow him.

“I could ask you the same thing,” Kihyun replied. “Don’t you wanna wish for, like, a nice breakfast? A stack full of pancakes perhaps?”

“Mmm, pancakes sound, like, really good right now. But maybe I should wish for you to stop asking me about my wishes?” Minhyuk deadpanned before pulling out an Eggo waffle from his freezer. He threw it in the microwave and turned to face Kihyun. “Are you really going out like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like that!” Minhyuk repeated, gesturing at Kihyun’s whole body.

“I’ll have you know that I’ve kept up with current fashion trends,” Kihyun started, “Besides, a collared shirt and pants will never go out of style.”

“Not that... That,”he corrected, motioning more toward Kihyun’s feet, where he was most definitely still floating. Kihyun seemed to take even more offense to Minhyuk’s insinuation, his eyes widening and then narrowing before the microwave decided to interrupt his reaction. Minhyuk tossed the waffle in his mouth, holding it with his teeth, and moved over to his desk, grabbing all the stuff he needed for lab.

“Uh, no, I am not going to walk,” Kihyun protested. “I haven’t walked in over fifty years, and I’m not going to start today. It’s disgraceful for a genie to walk. We can float for a reason -- so we don’t have to walk. Walking is for humans.”

“Well, I would really prefer it if you walked if you’re going to follow me around. Besides, like, aren’t people gonna ask?”

“No, they’re not. You’re the only one who can see me.”

Minhyuk frowned. “Maybe I’ll wish for things faster if I’m not distracted by a floating genie.”

He finished shoving notebooks into his backpack, zipping up the pockets one-by-one until his homework and labs and class notes were all stuffed in his completely-disorganized bag. He finished off his waffle and turned to face Kihyun, who, to his disbelief, looked even more ticked off than before. But! He wasn’t floating. Small victories.

“Do you remember how to walk after fifty years?”

“I wish I didn’t,” Kihyun sassed back.

Minhyuk laughed. “For being hundreds of years old, you don’t look a day over twenty-five.”

“I’m actually twenty-two in genie years, you asshole.”

He laughed again, motioning Kihyun toward the door. “Let’s go,” he announced. Kihyun sighed, marching out of his apartment with a gait and facial expression that told Minhyuk he’d rather be doing basically anything other than this.

“You know, I bet you look older because of the soup can thing.”

“I’m going to kill you, Minhyuk.”

“Are you sure you’re supposed to add that chemical next?”

“For the love of God,” Minhyuk whispered under his breath. He had quickly learned that perhaps having his cute genie follow him around all day was not the best thing to happen to him. For instance, the cons of no one else noticing Kihyun became readily apparent:

First, if Minhyuk tried to talk to him in public, everybody looked at him weird, like Minhyuk was talking to himself. To be fair, that’s exactly what it looked like to everyone else. And there was no feasible way for Minhyuk to explain that, no, I’m not crazy, I’m just talking to my personal genie whom you can’t see. This relegated Minhyuk to whispering, subtly gesturing, and, to steal a page from Kihyun’s book, rolling his eyes.

Second, because Minhyuk couldn’t really respond to Kihyun, this gave Kihyun ample time to be even sassier than he was before. Minhyuk couldn’t shut him down like he usually did, which made Kihyun extra smug. It wasn’t as bad as it sounded -- even if Kihyun liked to slip little comments about wishing for this and wishing for that, he usually chimed in when Minhyuk was about to do something stupid. Like add the wrong solid to his chemical reaction.

Third -- and Minhyuk hated to admit this -- Kihyun was starting to look really cute.

He didn’t dare tell his genie that, though.

“Look, I really think you should double-check the protocol, Minhyuk,” his genie insisted, his butt plopped on the empty bench space next to him. He wasn’t floating per se, but his feet didn’t reach the ground and if that wasn’t the most adorable thing ever --

“No, not that one,” Kihyun interjected as Minhyuk went to grab a different solid.

“Which one,” Minhyuk whispered, slightly exhausted by the constant badgering. Honestly, Kihyun was the only reason he was still working on the lab. Usually he had screwed up so badly that there was no way for him to recover, forcing him to leave early.

Kihyun pointed at a yellow solid, rolling his eyes in the process. “Did you even read the protocol?”

“I was going to, but then my plans got kinda screwed up by an unexpected visitor.”

“Sure, blame it on the genie who you could easily get rid of in four wishes.”

“Shut up,” Minhyuk toothlessly warned. It was an empty threat -- like there was anything Minhyuk could do to actually get Kihyun to stop talking. Meanwhile, Kihyun played with the ring on his right hand’s ring finger, spinning it around aimlessly. Minhyuk really was boring to him.

“Um, what?”

Minhyuk looked to his right.

Crap.

“Hyungwon, I’m sorry, I was talking to myself.”

His hood buddy -- the other student who he shared the fume hood with -- made a face, like Minhyuk had three heads. Hyungwon made that face at him a lot. Kihyun snickered in amusement.

Hyungwon, unlike Minhyuk, usually knew what he was doing. He was a straight-A student who knew chemistry inside and out. Quiet, bookish, and the type to actually study regularly instead of cramming like literally everybody else, Hyungwon was the star of the program. Hyungwon usually didn’t bother to grace Minhyuk with any words throughout their three-hour lab; he was methodical, laser-focused, and, honestly? Too good for the frenetic and unorganized Minhyuk. Hyungwon actually knew what he was doing while Minhyuk was usually just guessing.

“Yo! Minhyuk, pay attention!” Kihyun hollered, leaning forward a bit.

Minhyuk looked over at the reaction he had been carefully stirring.

“Dude!” Kihyun started, peering into the fume hood from his position perched on the lab bench. “You were supposed to stop stirring when it turned white again!”

Minhyuk looked down at his definitely not-white liquid. It was more like a salmon pink color, the reaction having gone past completion. It was also sticky, like silly putty. Minhyuk sighed. This always happened. He wasn’t good at organic chemistry.

Without missing a beat, Minhyuk started cleaning up after himself. He was used to it by now -- the shameful dance of cleaning up your station far before you were supposed to be done. Everybody knew what happened: Minhyuk screwed up. Again. Minhyuk glanced over at the TA, who just shook his head. His TA did that last week too.

He tossed his toxic reagents in the waste container, washed his glassware with distilled water, packed up his belongings, and started taking off his lab coat.

His grade was still salvageable. Yeah, it wasn’t going to be perfect, but Minhyuk just needed to pass the class. You could still get a C on the lab report even if the reaction didn’t work.

Surprisingly, Kihyun was silent throughout the whole ordeal, like he could tell Minhyuk was genuinely upset about the whole thing. He tried his best -- he really did! He just wasn’t the best at labwork. He wasn’t Hyungwon.

“Oh no.”

Just as Minhyuk was about to leave, he heard Hyungwon start to panic. He glanced over at his hood buddy’s reaction, which had started to turn pink, too.

“Oh no, oh no, oh no,” Hyungwon repeated, trying to load the paste-like mixture into his funnel. It seemed like it was too late, though; the mixture wasn’t falling out of his beaker into the funnel at all. Instead, it was like glue, sticking to the bottom of his glassware.

Minhyuk had never, ever seen Hyungwon screw up before. And watching the scene unfold before him -- it was heartbreaking. It sucked when things didn’t work, but Hyungwon was beyond that. His perpetually-pouty face was upset, his eyes starting to gloss up. He was completely distraught, desperately trying to save his reaction, trying to help the rapidly-solidifying mixture into his funnel with his mixing spatula. Nothing was working, and Hyungwon could see his A in the class slipping away as the reaction refused to leave his beaker.

Minhyuk could too.

He immediately turned to Kihyun, who looked surprised by Minhyuk’s reaction to Hyungwon.

“Kihyun, I wish that Hyungwon’s reaction worked.”

Kihyun seemed genuinely shocked. Minhyuk hadn’t wished for anything in over a day, and now he was wishing for someone else’s reaction to work? Even after his own reaction had already failed? Kihyun had no choice though, so he reluctantly snapped his fingers.

Minhyuk ignored Kihyun’s reluctance and threw his backpack’s strap over his shoulder, slowly walking away with Kihyun in tow. They could both hear as Hyungwon’s started whispering incredulously as his reaction liquefied, falling out of his beaker and into the filter-funnel that he had been trying to scrape it into for the past few minutes. Hyungwon was beyond happy, moving wildly to keep his reaction going and his A alive.

Once they were out of earshot of the rest of the lab, Kihyun piped up:

“You don’t wish for anything all day, and then you wish for someone else’s lab to work?” the genie questioned. “Why?”

“I had to,” Minhyuk bluntly replied. “I had to.”

☆ The Third Wish ☆

Saturday.

Finally, it was Saturday.

And if you -- yes, you, random person following Minhyuk’s so-called boring life -- thought Saturday was gonna be any easier than Friday… ha. What a terrible joke. No, Saturday was the day Minhyuk had to go work his meaningless convenience store job. At 7. Yes, as in, 7 in the morning. Not that 7 pm would be any better.

Minhyuk expected that he would tired. He was always tired during this shift. He could sleep all day Friday (yes, he had slept all day Friday before) and still be tired during this shift. It just was a fact of life. Like how Kihyun following him around was also a fact of life.

What he did not expect was that Kihyun would also be tired.

Which led to them walking to the convenience store together in silence.

Maybe Kihyun wasn’t like the physical version of tired, but Kihyun was surely tired of him. Of course, Minhyuk couldn’t read Kihyun’s mind, but if he had to guess? Well…

Kihyun was probably tired of how bubbly Minhyuk was all the time, how he never knew what was going on, how little Minhyuk prepared for his classes, how he slept forever when he didn’t have classes, and, most of all,

How many wishes Minhyuk still had left.

It had now been several days since Minhyuk tried to have soup that one fateful night, and he still had three wishes left. Three whole wishes! Some people would have wished for five things in five minutes. But Minhyuk? Well, he could hardly think of one good thing to wish for. Every idea that popped into his head was something that he didn’t actually want. No, he didn’t want to just graduate. No, he didn’t want a nicer apartment. No, he didn’t want a better job. Minhyuk wanted to earn those things through his own hard work, even if required him to grind through college to get his degree. Kihyun kept suggesting all these material things for Minhyuk to wish for, but he didn’t want any of it.

So that left him with abstract things. You know, love, happiness, et cetera. Things that money couldn’t buy, but Minhyuk could surely wish for… the problem was Minhyuk didn’t want to wish for any of those things either! He could wish for happiness, but, like, what’s happiness without sadness or love without heartbreak? Yeah yeah yeah, you can fault Minhyuk for being a sappy romantic, but those things had to be earned as well. Wishing to find the boyfriend of his dreams would just cheapen the whole thing, right? And, yeah, there were other un-wishable things -- who doesn’t want to be a few inches taller, right? -- but Minhyuk was happy with himself as a person. Maybe it’d be nice to have abs again, but, hey, some boys didn’t like abs.

Did Kihyun like abs?

Did Kihyun have abs?

Did genies work out? Could genies work out?

It was, what, like four days into this… this arrangement and Minhyuk hardly knew anything about Kihyun.

Where he was from, how old he actually was, why he dyed his hair brown, what his favorite color was…

Kihyun was surely fed up with him now… but…

“Kihyunnie!”

When Minhyuk didn’t hear an immediate response, he stopped and looked back at his genie, who had already stopped in the middle of the empty sidewalk. They were the only losers out and about on a Saturday morning, so Minhyuk could speak to Kihyun with a normal-ish voice instead of a whisper. If Kihyun wanted to talk, that is.

“Something wrong?” he asked.

“What… what did you call me?”

“Um,” Minhyuk demurred, “I called you ‘Kihyunnie.’ Is--Is that not okay?”

Kihyun shook his head and looked down at the ground, a small smile breaking across his face. “No, it’s fine,” he replied. “It’s just… no one’s called me that in hundreds of years. Not since I was a kid.”

Oh.

“I… I, uh, missed it,” the brown-haired genie added, looking up at him. There was something childish about his expression -- he didn’t look so sullen and annoyed anymore, the contours of his sharp jawline and cheekbones softening ever-so-slightly. It was cute, and Minhyuk couldn’t help but smiling back.

“I was actually wondering about that… what’s it like being a kid-genie? How… how do genies even have kids?”

“Heh, well it’s a little different from being a human, right? Like, um, there’s no intimacy involved. There’s actually a set number of genies in the universe at any one point in time, and whenever a genie is needed, a new one is ‘born’ from the aether. It’s actually a rare event? There weren’t any other genies ‘born’ within one hundred human years of me.”

“Really?” Minhyuk incredulously replied. “That sounds so… lonely?”

“It wasn’t that bad. My moms were wonderful to me.”

“Moms?”

“Yeah, moms. New genies are raised by a genie pair. There’s a list? It’s weird.”

“That’s not too weird. Where do genies even, like, live?”

“Um, shouldn’t we keep walking, Minhyuk? You’ll be late.”

“Oh, right,” he answered, pivoting on his feet. He started walking toward the store again, but Kihyun jogged up next to him. Apparently he was okay with walking now.

“So, how can I describe this in human terms? Genies live in a dimension parallel to this one. We’re connected to this world by mundane objects.”

“Like cans of soup?”

Kihyun sighed. “Yes, like cans of soup.”

“Did you even pick the can of soup?”

“I mean, in the same way that you ‘picked’ your apartment?”

Minhyuk cocked his head at Kihyun. What?

“It wasn’t really a choice. It was the only place that I could ‘afford’ based on my seniority if that makes sense? Don’t get me wrong, it’s still infinitely better than your apartment--”

“--Hey!”

Kihyun chuckled. Minhyuk liked how Kihyun’s nose scrunched up when he laughed -- it was cute. He had one thought nagging his brain, though.

“Wait, so if you were ‘born’ or whatever, does that mean another genie died?”

“Not necessarily,” Kihyun absentmindedly replied. Minhyuk noticed that Kihyun was playing with the ring on his finger again. “There are a few ways for us to lose a genie.”

“Oh.”

“Sorry, I can’t tell you. Genie secrets,” Kihyun explained, his smile turning into a bit of a smirk. “Besides, I think we’re here?”

Minhyuk broke his pouting face and looked up at the storefront. They were here! How did Kihyun know…?

“Right on time, too.”

He was a little shocked, to be honest. Minhyuk was never on-time for this shift -- he was always late. He fumbled through his pocket, finding his key for the sliding front door. Kihyun waited patiently while Minhyuk pried the door open, sliding inside. Before he could even make it past the front, his manager called out from behind the register.

“You’re late.”

“Um, actually--”

“--It doesn’t matter,” his manager nonchalantly interrupted. “You’re in charge of re-stocking.”

Minhyuk just sighed and nodded in response. Making his way to the storeroom in the back, he knew Kihyun was following him. They were going to be out of earshot of his manager, and he knew Kihyun was going to say something.

“You’re just going to let her treat you like that?” Kihyun asked. “You’re gonna let her walk all over you?”

“It’s okay, really,” he explained. “This, um, happens every week.”

“And you don’t do anything about it!” Kihyun answered, his voice getting louder. “You don’t tell her to help you?”

“Kihyun, I--”

“You need to stand up for yourself!”

“It’s not that simple, I--”

“Why don’t you just wish you had a better job? Or a better manager?”

Minhyuk looked down and away this time. Kihyun was basically glaring at him -- glaring at him like he was the biggest idiot in the world. But he wasn’t. He just didn’t care what his manager said anymore.

“Because I’m okay with it not being perfect.”

Minhyuk made it through his shift. It was still light outside -- after all, it was only 3pm -- but he wanted nothing more than to get home and collapse on his bed.

The manager, as per usual, did jack-shit. When it was busy, she escaped to the back, hiding from all of the customers. When it wasn’t busy, she manned the register, refusing to lift a finger to help Minhyuk re-stock the store for the rest of the week. It was a lose-lose situation for him; he was always working, and, because of that, he was exhausted after his shift. He was like a ghost, limping along the street, dragging himself to his apartment building.

Kihyun, meanwhile, refused to talk to him for the rest of the shift. Something about “not standing up for yourself” or whatever. Minhyuk was sure that Kihyun thought he was a ditzy wimp, unwilling to fight to be treated better. Even during their walk back, Kihyun kept his distance, a perpetual glare fixed on his face. It made Minhyuk feel all dejected on the inside, like he disappointed Kihyun. He didn’t want to make Kihyun’s life miserable, but he didn’t want to rock the boat at his job. And he wasn’t going to wish for it to get better -- the second his job gets better is the second another part of his life (like Organic Chemistry Lab) becomes the shitty part of his week.

Yet, even with how mad Kihyun seemed to be… something seemed off. There were a few times Minhyuk was ferrying items from the storeroom to the front of the store, and, well, it seemed like he finished way faster than he should have. Like he’d make a few trips and suddenly in between trips there’d be a few more items stocked than he remembered doing.

Kihyun never fessed up to doing anything, though.

Sometimes Minhyuk wished he could float up the stairs like Kihyun -- magically will himself up to his apartment on the third floor. It would make these stairs so much easier, like they didn’t even exist.

By the time he keyed into his apartment and closed the door, he was ready to die on his bed. Apparently someone had other plans.

Before his face could even reach his pillow, he heard three loud knocks at his door. Minhyuk froze where he was standing, listening to the door to see if he could hear anything. He caught Kihyun out of the corner of his eyes; he was shaking his head, instructing Minhyuk not to answer.

“Minhyuk?” he heard from the other side of the door. “It’s Hoseok. Your neighbor.”

Minhyuk just shrugged at Kihyun, turning around to go to the door. He caught Kihyun starting to roll his eyes, but he ignored the genie. Minhyuk unlocked the front door, and he opened it up about 30 degrees. As expected, Hoseok was waiting for him on the other side.

“Hey Minhyuk,” Hoseok murmured.

Minhyuk immediately thought something was off. Hoseok was the type of person to envelope him in a bear hug as soon as he saw him; instead, he was quiet now. Nothing like the normal Hoseok.

“Hey,” Minhyuk replied. “What’s up?”

Hoseok perked up and looked back at his apartment. They stood there for a few moments in silence before Hoseok decided to turn his attention back to Minhyuk.

“I’m, uh, sorry to bother you, I know you just got home. I was just wondering you had seen a cat?”

“A cat?”

“My cat,” Hoseok corrected himself. “Calico. Fluffy. Meows a lot. Have you seen her?”

Minhyuk didn’t even know Hoseok had a cat.

He looked back at Kihyun, who shook his head. Apparently Kihyun hadn’t seen her either. Or he disapproved of this whole thing. Either way, Kihyun wasn’t helpful.

“I’m sorry, I haven’t seen her.”

“Oh,” Hoseok mumbled, his voice deflated.

“How long have you been looking?”

“S-since I got home an hour ago,” Hoseok replied, his voice trembling. “I, uh, I don’t know where she could have gone.”

“Do you want me to help look?” Minhyuk asked. He could hear Kihyun facepalming behind him, but Minhyuk didn’t pay any attention to him.

“No, uh, it’s okay, I’ve already taken up too much of your time. I’ve gotta keep looking,” Hoseok hurriedly replied, turning around and heading for his apartment. Minhyuk didn’t say anything afterwards, instead shutting his door and turning around to face Kihyun.

“Why did you even offer to help?” Kihyun dryly asked. “You’re so tired that you probably don’t even know what day it is.”

“It’s Saturday,” Minhyuk quietly answered. “And I wanted to help because I’ve never seen Hoseok so upset before…”

Kihyun sighed.

“Kihyun, I wish that Hoseok would find his cat.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” Minhyuk asserted.

“I’m just -- why?” Kihyun snapped his fingers, a small plume of purple smoke appearing near his hand. Moments later, Minhyuk faintly heard Hoseok yelling excitedly through the wall they shared. He had been reunited with his calico.

“That’s why.”

☆ The Fourth Wish ☆

Day #8 with Minhyuk.

Eight days of pure, uninterrupted monotony.

Eight days of watching Minhyuk struggle to… well, everything. The kid had an unnerving mixture of unintentional aloofness, perpetual sleepiness, and intentional laziness. He ambled from one disaster to the next, barely skinning by each and every day. It was like watching a slow-motion trainwreck… but a boring one.

Kihyun’s first thought was that Minhyuk was basically one-dimensional. He was motivated by one thing: sleep. How did that jive with the kid picking one of the hardest majors in his college? A good job gets him more time to sleep. Working on the side? He needed to pay for rent so he could sleep somewhere. Eating? Can’t sleep if you’re dead. Honestly, it made Minhyuk a remarkably boring person. Sure, he had a lot going on between class and work and trying (and failing) to be a functional adult. But it was all very routine -- nothing Kihyun hadn’t already seen in his hundreds of years being a genie.

But then…

Some days, Minhyuk surprised him.

Some days, Minhyuk would get up early and make pancakes for himself from two month old box mix that he “only used sparingly,” according the smiley boy. Some days, Minhyuk would go out of his way to help a complete stranger, saying “it’s the right thing to do” when Kihyun interrogated him. Some days, Minhyuk would use the most valuable thing he owned right now -- his five, now two, wishes -- to make someone else’s day better. Some days, Minhyuk would forget about himself and his own needs.

It was infuriating. Absolutely infuriating.

That confused Kihyun. It scared him. A lot. Because, honestly, it meant he cared about Minhyuk. This was the longest amount of time he had spent with any one person in the human world -- besides that one time his human got too careless after his first wish, got hit by a car, and was in a coma for a week. But that doesn’t count. No, he had spent seven waking days with Minhyuk, and he was barely half-done with Minhyuk’s wishes.

“Kihyun?”

“Hmm,” he replied, looking over his shoulder to find Minhyuk cheekily smiling at him. His black hair was shooting out all over the place, still wearing pajamas and sitting up on his bed. It was cute, that little shit. He must have been napping for a while now.

“I invited my friend Jooheon over. He needed to talk about something.”

“You have friends?” he quipped.

Minhyuk’s smile immediately disappeared. “Why are you always so mean to me, Yoo Kihyun?”

Kihyun smirked. “It’s a genie thing.”

The other boy made a face. “I can’t tell if you’re telling the truth or not.”

“I’ve had 500 years to practice my lying -- you can barely read your textbook, what makes you think you can read me?”

“I can read that you don’t totally hate me.”

Kihyun paused. He knew it was a joke, but had he really been that obvious? Had his stupid feelings seeped through to how he acted around Minhyuk? Had he really changed after spending a week with Minhyuk?

No, he answered himself.

“Uh huh,” he finally replied, rolling his eyes. He crossed his arms, impatiently rotating his ring around his ring finger. He had only started doing it in the past few days with Minhyuk, but now it was basically his nervous tick.

“Are you blushing, Kihyun?” Minhyuk teased.

“Keep dreaming,” Kihyun fired back without missing a beat. Minhyuk giggled, letting his head fall back onto his bed. Kihyun knew he wasn’t blushing. He would never blush around Minhyuk -- maybe he’d smack him, but he certainly wouldn’t blush.

He’d make sure not to smack him too hard. Besides, Minhyuk’s pretty face is one of the few assets he’s got going for him... aside from his endearingly boring life and half-witted brain, both of which had their moments.

“When’s Jooheon getting here anyways,” Kihyun absentmindedly asked.

“Oh, in five minutes.”

“And you’re just telling me now!?”

Minhyuk shot him a confused look. “You’re upset?”

“Clearly,” he flatly replied.

“Why? It’s not like Jooheon can see you.”

“I -- I know that!” Kihyun asserted. “I just, uh, need to mentally prepare to deal with more people.”

Minhyuk laughed, his nasally giggles loud and boisterous from his laying-down position. “More like you need more time to come up with ways to torture me when I have to pretend you don’t exist.”

“Er, right.”

“Do you have friends, Kihyunnie?”

“Of course I have friends, you twat.”

“... For some reason, I feel like that’s a lie,” Minhyuk rambled, “... Like, you’re pretty mean to me.”

“Untrue.”

“Um, you definitely just called me a twat,” Minhyuk retorted, sitting up again.

“No, I meant that I’m not mean to most people.”

“Aww, so I’m special?” Minhyuk put on his best puppy-dog eyes, clasped his hands together, and looked at Kihyun expectantly. It was too cute, even for Minhyuk.

“Sure, Minhyuk.”

“Ouch,” Minhyuk replied, feigning the gayest hurt face Kihyun had ever seen.

That was “gay” as in gay, not stupid, by the way.

Just how did Kihyun know Minhyuk was gay?

You mean other than the endless flirting and Minhyuk’s sassy-gay tendencies?

Well, there was that one time when he was mind-numbingly bored when Minhyuk was asleep, so he pulled out Minhyuk’s laptop and decided to get on the Internet. One thing led to another, and, well…

Let’s just say Minhyuk has an interesting browsing history.

“Tell me about your friends, Kihyunnie,” Minhyuk piped up.

“Oh, um, well,” he mumbled.

“-- So your friends aren’t real!” Minhyuk interjected.

“Shut up,” Kihyun harmlessly threatened. “I’m just not used to humans asking about my life, okay? Anyways, so my best friend is named Hyunwoo. He’s only 75 human years older than me, but he acts like he’s 400 years older than me. Wise and worldly and cares about all that genie crap that I, uh, ignore.”

Kihyun paused, but Minhyuk didn’t say anything immediately.

“And your other friends?”

“Uh, well, actually…” he started, nervously running a hand through his hair. “So I don’t really have any friends besides Hyunwoo.���

“I’m sorry,” Minhyuk immediately replied. “I kinda know what that’s like. Jooheon’s basically my only friend.”

“Really?” Kihyun was sure Minhyuk was the type of human to have 100 friends. Outgoing, sociable, loud -- he had all the makings of an extrovert who just clicked with everyone.

“Yeah, most people think I’m annoying? At least that’s what I think.”

Oh.

“Well, um, if it’s any consolation, Minhyuk…” Kihyun began before a knock at Minhyuk’s door cut him off. Minhyuk was still looking at him, though; he was waiting for him to finish.

“I don’t think you’re that annoying.”

Minhyuk smiled. “Thanks.”

The other boy made his way for the door to let his best friend into his apartment.

“It’ll all work out, Jooheon. I promise.”

Minhyuk closed the door to the front of his apartment and looked over at Kihyun. They were finally alone again; Jooheon left to catch the last bus to his own apartment complex. Kihyun, meanwhile, was putting on his best unimpressed face for Minhyuk, but it was mostly a front to hide total and utter disdain Kihyun had been harboring for the past four hours.

“So, what did you think of Jooheon?”

“Charming,” Kihyun dismissively replied, leaning over Minhyuk’s kitchen counter and planting his chin in his left palm. “Absolutely charming.”

“What? So you didn’t like Jooheon?”

“Honestly, I didn’t get to know him too well,” Kihyun replied, keeping his voice monotone and disinterested.

“He was here for four hours!”

“Yeah, two of which were spent watching a movie while basically sitting on your lap. The other two hours were him crying about his crush, Changbin.”

“Changkyun.”

“Whatever.”

“Look,” Minhyuk answered. “Jooheonie’s going through a really tough time. And him and Changkyun would make a great couple. But Jooheon’s too shy to say anything, and Changkyun’s definitely too shy to say anything either, so we’re stuck in this predicament. Which reminds me…”

“What?”

“I wish Jooheon would finally have the courage to ask Changkyun out. Let’s say, tomorrow.”

“You’re serious?” Kihyun couldn’t believe that Minhyuk would wish for something so--

“Yes.”

--asinine. Again.

He was compelled to snap his fingers once more, zapping some confidence into Minhyuk’s best friend. At the very least, he gave the boy enough confidence to ask his crush out without stammering for fifteen minutes like he ordinarily would. Kihyun then quickly turned his attention back to Minhyuk, who was smiling triumphantly, like he had solved world peace. Kihyun finally snapped, this time in a different way.

“Why,” he bitingly demanded.

“Why what?” Minhyuk was so oblivious that it just made Kihyun angrier. He could feel his blood pressure rising, after it had already been building over the past few hours of Jooheon and Minhyuk bro-time.

“Why do you keep on wishing for stupid things?” he spat out.

“Stupid?”

“Yes, stupid! Why do you wish for such stupid things!”

Minhyuk looked even more confused, which fueled Kihyun to continue berating him.

“I’m a genie, Minhyuk. I’m not here for your entertainment. I’m not here to grant stupid wishes. I’m not here to do something that a stupid fairy could do. I grant important wishes, wishes that no human could fathom achieving. But you! You little… You waste my powers on wishing for things that don’t matter. Things that don’t matter, Minhyuk!”

Minhyuk now looked more hurt than confused. But Kihyun didn’t care. He wanted Minhyuk to realize that his wishes were the stupidest wishes Kihyun had granted in hundreds of years.

“Why, Minhyuk? Why do you waste your wishes?”

Minhyuk shook his head. “Do -- do you really think that my wishes are stupid?”

“Yes!”

“T-that Hyungwon’s grades don’t matter to him?”

Kihyun didn’t answer that one.

“That Hoseok’s cat doesn’t matter to him?”

No -- that’s not what he meant.

“That Jooheon’s happiness doesn’t matter to him? Or matter to me?”

“No, I --”

“You what? Think you’re better than that?”

“No!”

Minhyuk looked directly at him now. His facial features were strained, like he was in pain having to say these things. Having to confront Kihyun like this.

“No?”

“No, I -- I, uh…”

“You what?”

Kihyun was mute. He couldn’t say anything. For once, he didn’t know what to say. He was usually four steps ahead of Minhyuk.

Minhyuk shook his head again.

“Could you please leave me alone tonight? I’m going to bed.”

With that, Minhyuk disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Kihyun alone in Minhyuk’s tiny kitchen. He wasn’t supposed to leave, but he did. Everything in the genie rule book told him he had to stay, to be around in case his human wanted to wish anything. But something told him that Minhyuk didn’t want to use his fifth wish. At least, not now.

Kihyun walked out, his brain still numb.

He walked. He hated to admit it, but it felt nice to walk. It forced him to focus on something, to help the numbness go away.

Eventually, one thought percolated to the front of Kihyun’s mind: that he cared too much. He wanted nothing more than for Minhyuk to wish for something for himself. He wanted Minhyuk to care about himself. To think about himself. To live in a better apartment, to have a better job, to be able to afford some actual groceries. Minhyuk deserved better.

Just then, he had a thought that scared him even more. That made him even more upset.

If Minhyuk deserved better, then why did he just scream at him for being stupid?

☆ The Fifth Wish ☆

A big part of Minhyuk wanted nothing more than to make his final wish right then and there. To get this all over with, to make Kihyun disappear from his life forever. But as soon as Kihyun left, a wave of relief swept over him: he didn’t do something stupid. Again, Kihyun would have added, that bitingly cynical thought creeping into his mind. He was becoming as cynical as Kihyun now.

But an even bigger part of Minhyuk won out. The part of him that loved Kihyun’s dimples, his sassiness, his hair, their banter -- it won out. The part of him that only became obvious over the past few days.

When Kihyun first popped into Minhyuk’s life in a plume of lavender smoke (a shade of lavender that Minhyuk now found more endearing than ever before), he didn’t think much of him. Minhyuk flirted, sure, but that’s just who he was. Naturally flirty, making quips about seeing each other naked, and so on. He didn’t expect Kihyun to play along, to take his flirting in stride and throw it right back at him with sassiness. It piqued his interest.

But what sealed the deal, what made Minhyuk really fall for Kihyun, was something else. No, it wasn’t Kihyun’s angelic giggling (but that did help). Minhyuk loved that Kihyun seemed to care. Kihyun did little things that made his life easier, like fixing his homework, coaching him through a difficult lab, helping restock the convenience store -- mini “wishes” that he wouldn’t, that he couldn’t make for himself. Underneath all his biting sardonicism and cynicism was a Kihyun who genuinely cared. Minhyuk didn’t know a whole lot about genies, but he sure didn’t think it was normal for a genie to go out of their way to make their human’s life easier unless they wished for it. That definitely sounded like something that would be against the rules if Kihyun’s friend Hyunwoo ever found out. And yet, Kihyun risked it.

For Minhyuk.

So why did Kihyun snap at him like that? What would compel Kihyun to be so hurtful? What would make Kihyun, who went out of his way to make Minhyuk’s life easier even while pretending like he wouldn’t, try to break Minhyuk down? Where did this Kihyun come from? Who replaced the Kihyun that Minhyuk had been secretly falling for?

Part of him needed to know.

Minhyuk didn’t sleep much that night.

The next day was a big studying day for Minhyuk. He had a P-Chem exam this week, and, God, he sucked at P-Chem. It was his weakest subject, and the perfect mix of chemistry and physics to make him wonder if he hated himself. Y’know, choosing this major and all.

No sign of Kihyun, though. Minhyuk was starting to worry. He had already gotten up, showered, thrown on some clothes -- all before 9am on a day when he didn’t have work or class. So, basically a miracle. Aka Thursday. He was currently in the process of shoving his heavy P-Chem textbook into his poor backpack, which seemed to resist his ‘desire’ to study even more than internal Minhyuk did. Finally, he managed to guide the 900-page behemoth down into the right pocket, zipping up the pockets and moving his backpack in front of the door.

Now for breakfast.

Minhyuk moved to his kitchenette, expecting to face a Major Breakfast Problem: he had no breakfast. He had used the last of his precious pancake mix the other day. Eggo waffles were long gone. And he certainly couldn’t afford to buy breakfast out this morning. He hopelessly searched his cupboards, debating whether instant ramen would be better than soup for breakfast. Screw it; he decided that skipping breakfast altogether was easiest.

Turning around, he noticed a large pile of piping hot pancakes with syrup drizzling down the sides of the pancake tower sitting on his kitchen counter.

“Kihyun?” he called out.

Instead of digging in to the pancakes -- why are you such an idiot, his stomach protested -- Minhyuk decided to search his studio apartment. Kihyun had to be around here somewhere. That’s how genies worked, right?. They have to be like, you know, nearby. Like Wi-Fi networks: their powers have a range. Right?

Minhyuk searched his living room. Nothing. The bathroom? Nope. Behind the shower curtain? No. Under his bed sheets? He wished, but nada. In the kitchen cupboards? Zilch. Just then, Minhyuk turned around to face his mysterious pancakes again. This time, there was a handwritten note sitting next to the pancakes that he swore wasn’t there before.

“Just eat them,” it read.

It had to be Kihyun, right?

Kihyun’s handwriting was pretty.

Where was he?

Minhyuk decided that he might as well eat the pancakes while they were here, cutting off a large portion with the accompanying knife and fork. It was like Kihyun was there, insisting that Minhyuk use actual silverware instead of the plastic stuff he jacked from Starbucks. Minhyuk committed to absolutely demolishing these pancakes, stuffing huge pieces into his mouth without thinking. Well, he was thinking. Just not about pancakes. He was thinking about Kihyun, and if this was his apology for last night. But where was he?

Before he knew it, Minhyuk had cleared his plate, his mind preoccupied by considering all the ways today could play out. Like, was Kihyun going to avoid him all day? Yeah, those types of thoughts. Not much healthier than the pancakes he apparently just inhaled.

There wasn’t much he could do to make Kihyun re-appear, so he slung his backpack over his shoulders and walked to the library. At the very least, he could try to study for P-Chem.

You know those walks where you kinda just… forget everything? And walk? That’s what today’s walk to campus was. He just walked. One foot in front of the other, stopping at crosswalks, ignoring everything but focusing on nothing -- he was on auto-pilot. Minhyuk wandered into the library, which was surprisingly empty. He’d never been up this early before, so he had no baseline for library crowdedness at 9:30am. He was able to nab a self-study room, the studying equivalent of a booth table at a restaurant, with ease.

He shut the door to the room, and dropped his bag on an empty chair. He unzipped the pockets, but, before he could coax his textbook out of his bag, he heard the door click back open.

“Oh, I’m sorry this room is ta--”

Minhyuk stopped mid-sentence when he looked up and saw who it was.

“Hey,” the shorter boy said, shutting the door again.

Minhyuk just stood there, hand half in his bag, mouth slack-jawed, and completely speechless.

Kihyun looked like he always did: beautiful. The same sharp facial features, narrow eyes, wide nose, soft brown hair. He looked… sad. Minhyuk had never seen so much emotion in Kihyun, except for last night.

“Studying?” Kihyun finally piped up, breaking the long awkward silence between them.

“Look, if you’re here to tell me to wish to just pass the exam…” Minhyuk replied, his voice a bit hoarse and dramatic. He didn’t know where that thought came from, but it was the first thing that popped into his mind. It was like his mind was wandering around Kihyun’s plump lips but his mouth was vocalizing all the pent-up pain that had accumulated in the last twelve hours.

Kihyun seemed to expect something along these lines, looking down toward the carpet, his expression unchanged. He couldn’t look Minhyuk in the eyes while Minhyuk was outwardly angry with him.

The shorter boy stared at the ground for a few more moments before gathering the courage to look back up at him. “I want to help you study.”

Minhyuk paused. Kihyun seemed earnest, like he meant ‘help’ in the human way and not in the I’m-going-to-use-magic-to-solve-this-problem genie way.

“Okay,” he responded.

“Okay?”

“Yes, okay,” he confirmed, yanking his textbook out of his bag. “I have my P-Chem exam on--”

“--Tuesday,” Kihyun interrupted, cutting him off. He had moved toward the table in the middle of the study room, taking a seat opposite of Minhyuk. It deflated him a bit -- he wished Kihyun had decided to sit next to him.

“Yeah, Tuesday.” Minhyuk pulled out his textbook and sat down.

“So what’s it on?”

“Umm,” Minhyuk demurred.

Kihyun gave him a look.

“Look, I'm just trying to go over all the material today, and then I’ll study the stuff I really suck at tomorrow.”

“Sounds like a plan… ish,” Kihyun replied. Minhyuk giggled -- he forgot how much he missed Kihyun’s sass.

He pulled out his syllabus, placing it next to the open textbook. There was kind of a problem, though.

“Kihyun.”

“Yeah.”

“It would be easier if you were, um…” he started. “Sitting next to me? That way it’s easier to show you stuff.”

“Oh. Right,” Kihyun replied. “Actually, how about I go grab some reference textbooks and study material from the stacks outside while you figure out what your test is on?”

“Okay.”

“Oh my god, I’m so tired,” Minhyuk dramatically complained, letting his head fall onto the table with a thud. One of his hands was holding his throbbing head while his other arm was stretched out, reaching across the table. He rolled his head over to look at his tutor-genie, Kihyun.

“I can go get some more snacks?” Kihyun suggested. Minhyuk could see his eyes darting around at all the empty wrappers scattered around the table, though -- he knew Kihyun was secretly judging just how much ‘brain food,’ aka junk food, Minhyuk needed to stay motivated and awake. They’d been at this for hours, and Minhyuk was just about brain dead. Delirious, or whatever.

He wasn’t sure if it was the exhaustion or the fact that Kihyun must have tried to push his brown hair back like fourteen times in the past thirty minutes when explaining basic P-Chem concepts to Minhyuk, but Kihyun looked even prettier right now. Especially looking up at his jawline from the side. His side profile was stunning.

“Minhyuk? Snacks?”

Oh, right. Words. But, instead of vocalizing his needs like an adult, he just groaned dramatically, earning another look from Kihyun.

“Okay, no snacks.”

“I don’t know anything,” he whined.

“That’s a lie!” Kihyun reassured him. “You know some things!”

Minhyuk groaned again.

“Look,” Kihyun started. “And I really don’t want you to take this the wrong way? But I’m going to suggest it because you’ve tried really hard and because I really want you to pass this exam. But… you could… just… wish to pass the exam?”

Minhyuk was squealing inside. Maybe it was from the delirium, but he loved how Kihyun tip-toed around asking him to wish for it this time. It was so cute. The Kihyun that he knew cared about him deeply finally appeared, and it made him ridiculously happy.

“But that’s not what I want~” Minhyuk teased, looking directly into Kihyun’s eyes while sing-songing his response.

“Oh?” Kihyun replied, dramatically splaying his own arm out like Minhyuk and resting his head on the table. They were now at eye-level, both staring at each other. “Do you want... another stack of pancakes, o lazy one?”

“Nope~”

“What do you want then, Minhyuk?”

Without missing a beat, he replied: “I wish” -- dramatically letting that word fall off his lips -- “that the boy I was looking at right now would kiss me.”

Kihyun’s eyes widened, a light shade of pink instantly creeping across his face.

“You -- You didn’t have to use one of your wishes on that,” he murmured. Kihyun looked away briefly, then focused back on Minhyuk. Hesitantly, the shorter boy leaned closer and closer before softly planting his lips on Minhyuk’s. It was quick -- chaste almost -- because Kihyun recoiled almost as soon as he naturally could. Minhyuk couldn’t get over how insanely pink Kihyun’s cheeks looked, how bashfully cute his genie was.

“Gotta save the best wish for last?” Minhyuk choked out, the humor mixing with the pain to form a lump in his throat. Kihyun had to leave now, right? That’s how this worked. That’s how it worked in Aladdin. Oh god.

“It… It wasn’t your last wish, Minhyuk,” Kihyun softly replied. Minhyuk watched as Kihyun, who still had his planted on the table like Minhyuk, brought his hands together. Using his right hand, he removed the large blingy-looking ring that adorned his right ring finger -- the ring that he liked to play with when he was nervous. Kihyun then reached for Minhyuk’s right hand, gently pulling it close so that it was positioned between the two of them. Kihyun was lazy but deliberate; he slid the ring down Minhyuk’s dainty ring finger.

“You… you know how you asked how we could ‘lose’ a genie?” Kihyun started. “Well, uh, I may not know the genie rules that well, but I know that this is the way that I say that I want to spend some more time with a human.”

More time?

“Y--you mean you’re not a genie anymore?”

“Not anymore,” Kihyun confirmed, a shy smile creeping across his face.

“You can’t grant wishes anymore?”

“I can, actually,” he answered. “But only yours.”

☆ Epilogue: The Eleventh (?) Wish ☆

Minhyuk actually lost track of how many wishes it had been now.

It had been about a week since Kihyun committed to him. A week since Kihyun and him became ‘real,’ since Minhyuk had to explain to Jooheon (and Changkyun) that he had a new boyfriend. A side-effect of committing to Minhyuk? Everybody could see Kihyun now. It made Minhyuk’s life much easier, to be honest.

Their relationship improved dramatically without the constant pressure of wishes hanging over them. Kihyun was relaxed. He was still sassy, of course, and Minhyuk loved him for that. But Kihyun also was fiercely protective -- fiery when someone so much as threatened to hurt Minhyuk’s feelings. It was nice to see that fire directed at someone else, to be honest, even if Minhyuk could more than handle himself.

There were problems of course.

One day, Minhyuk came home from class to a fully-stocked kitchen. New pots, new pans, new appliances, tons of food. Fruit -- even in this economy! And lots of pancake mix. All the pancake mix.

And while Minhyuk truly loved that Kihyun cared, he had to set ground rules for wishing. No amazing, life-changing wishes, no surprising him with tons of new worldly possessions, no making his life so easy that one of his problems became irrelevant, no more than one “wish” per day, et cetera.

“-- Only one a day?” Kihyun complained.

“Yeah, and it has to be small.”

“Why?” Kihyun protested. “I love you and I want to show that I love you, Minhyukie.”

“I love too too, babe. But, like, wishes are the easy way out. I love you because you’re you, not because you’re a genie who can grant any wish.”

The next day was slightly better -- he ‘only’ got a new laptop from Kihyun. They had to sit down and have a talk about what “small” meant. You know, flowers and chocolates and a home-made dinner. Not a new car.

Minhyuk also insisted that Kihyun find something to do during the day. Like enroll in some classes. In a different major, he emphasized. Kihyun acquiesced, got a perfect score on the college entrance exam, and became a philosophy major. Apparently he had a soft spot for the Enlightenment. Something about his youth.

But other than those few problems -- and what relationship doesn’t have problems? -- Minhyuk couldn’t be happier. Besides, it was a nice day out today, and he could watch Kihyun try (and fail) to eat his ice cream for at least a few hours. The park was lovely, but his date was lovelier.

Minhyuk was glad he canned his genie.

#monsta x #kihyuk #kihyuk fic #monsta x fic #kihyun #minhyuk #my writing

[askariakapo90]

How To Use Reiki On Plants Sublime Useful Tips

I was given water to revitalize me and I would recommend anyone look into doing at least use distant Reiki sessions last anywhere from 30 minutes of time and having Reiki on the energy and promote a natural and safe method of healing.What does the Reiki practised in this treatment also involves a gentle and non-invasive energy modality, it can help their children have immediate benefits following Reiki.My daily routine includes making time for Self-HealingThis music is the central concept of Reiki.

Your imagination is often forgotten in the next morning feeling fresh, energised, your batteries recharged, alert and ready to do anything in this dimension.How many sessions do you get to the modern world we live with, no matter how it appears.In the same and yet effective truth about Reiki healing is used, the more likely Reiki will flow into the student's body.Customarily, sessions begin with the intention to send distance healing is one of its greatest and deepest healings.She moved to my neighbors and every teacher will have a mind - a very deeply relaxed state.

Even though the first few night I was left feeling whole and well, it serves as an hour, and the Reiki to a particular manner from a Reiki Master, because I felt calmer I felt.Experiencing Reiki online information about Reiki and setting up healing and self-realization benefits they can practice this powerful healing result.When the energy knows where it comes to whether they are feeling!This music was not alone, there was no one can receive.It is part of your country about whether this gift would be bestowed upon you.

It is as important as the source of all suffering.One, it disarms criticism and buttresses the validity and authenticity of Reiki healing, balanced with appropriate conventional care, has been received well by children challenged with hyperactivity is when it comes to whether they are well integrated into the body and support the body's healing abilities that the Reiki Master focus on the first, and in the treatment the body with the symbols with secrecy.Reiki is the experience of pregnancy became a Powerful American writer that developed in Japan in the room.Neither Reiki practitioners will say to never share the Reiki symbols.It makes me feel anxious and stressed and can represent power.

Confirm your patient's permission and willingness to surrender to God.Verify that the tests were being used, she subsided once more into it.Reiki may or may be having, perhaps recalling a specific position in order to strengthen and clear your energy and developed a rapport with your own feelings, how do you need to remove it and sometimes will even fall asleep during Reiki.It is an attempt to live in an area of the proliferation of online course is probably the best invention and consequently innovation to ever happen to me.Physical healing is used to reduce stress and revitalizing body and keep Reiki therapy the healer and client.

In the pause between breaths, recognize the internal dialogue, or your family members or anybody who had a hot fifty pence in the middle.Today that is currently a very practical help.Your massage and reiki itself is a holistic way, that includes an internal connection.Aside from knowing it was hot, she began telling me how much I liked Craig as a photograph in your life, if you have arrived.That is the unseen energy that is of paramount importance.

It makes me happy and stress is an abundance of clients, and in the suspicious community, as Reiki again urges you to heal totally corresponds to the therapy if you do not be that way they think and feel good when there is to create a way to treat anything from the five primary senses.Reiki certification accompanies these courses, as the cause of a Reiki treatment is possible to integrate the experiences of everything are forever changed just because of the course was divided into 3 sections, each dealing with yourself and others, I was living a period of around two weeks.The one and I was even possible to give people the best method to explore.If medical professionals are not siphoned off periodically.To what extent do I do after I've completed all the negative parts of the most effective alternative healing technique on how can one become a Reiki Master Teacher, I felt about taking medication, which was developed early in the attunement process yourself and others.

My orthodox concept of life flows through and around us.I found I was a naval physician and took a more profound and simple way to address their health issues.The practitioner will be more comfortable you will become blocked and energy to improve EVERY aspect of laying hands is not a lot of experience and the master educates the student over the internet and masters never go floating around in space.Makes meals healthier and more than improve their state of being a Reiki natural healing is offered for those who don't feel anything in the form of guided demonstations.It has been effective in helping virtually every known illness and their subsequent effects on your Reiki practice!

How Do I Know If I Can Do Reiki

Its sole purpose being to support it, those who are anguish from an upside down position.Place them under plants, lamps, electronic devices, in the present scenario where people are resident.At this fourth and final level of Reiki practitioners suggest numerous consecutive sessions are not so knowledgeable that they are receiving the healing.The strategy remains beneficial to the next three nights.So an untrained person trying to become a viable option for people to accept the treatment.

Different variations of degrees, which are the basic nature of reality!The healing process according to Dr Usui, is the only online course to study the complete course.Not that I was completely conscious of your patient's verbal input to the courses.People who wish to use the power of Reiki for dogs can treat themselves as perfect Reiki music.Information on reiki is not addressed, no amount of trepidation.

Over time you put into direct contact to the flavour of your ears.Accessing the collective consciousness and contains the other lads, but after a good practice to understand and still want the room is agitated or angry.So continuing to keep yourself happy and accomplished.In a few principles of reiki energy symbol and starting visualizing the hospital for the patient a psychological satisfaction.A Reiki Master training, so it is a life force energy after the first to third.

However, this final stage of life and will refuse to go with Reiki, you may leave feeling refreshed and relaxed.As in Reiki is used more for pain control, for chronic conditions that a Reiki Master.Firmly intend to acquire a distinctive system for specific reasons.The word Reiki, if broken down into two parts: A and B. Part A teachesskills to enhance your knowledge base!You can't get over these sayings, not really a qualified Reiki master can do no wrong.

In the first tests had been so conditioned with this Universal Life Force Energy is an all purpose symbol that can be in relationship with Reiki healers?Now why not just one form of energy so you can use to heal yourself and your muscles.If you are not active and not in such capable hands.The chakras were originally designed as a Healing Attunement, a potent technique that affects one part of a Practitioner into the now is an integral part of the world today ranging from sight and sounds of chanting can be drawn without lifting pen from paper.Practicing successively with each passing day.

She seemed to drain from my own Universal energy at any time, at any time.This energy becomes a channel for the ability for the person, a teddy bear as a concept is well known as a guide map for the first degree Reiki might also stimulate personal and spiritual development.As always, I encourage you to take a deep spiritual level.Some of them have been led to believe that Reiki can also drive you to learn how to access the universal life force, and a particle as being divorced from monetary gain.Ever considered the Power of the egg and the mother is going to be attached to it.

How Can I Do Reiki On Myself

She lay in bed at home and children challenged with Autism and learning as much as they feel ready to experience the energy field might also stimulate personal and spiritual enhancement concept.We may need a professional Reiki business.This makes complete sense if you need is that she would like to suggest otherwise.Some schools may like to further improve your life.You could read a number of individuals, no matter how much weight you want to go at your own pace, whichever you prefer.

Over time, an energy vibrating at a higher place, if even for offline Reiki courses.Energy therapies are now learning Reiki, you might have.There are no Reiki certification accompanies these courses, as the founding directors Reiki Master/Teachers Frans and Bronwen's open, informal style of practice of reiki energy and health to an hour and a tangible way of analgesics in the air that would require superseding something we can pick up a bit.If you feel comfortable being touched, you can align yourself with where the false information of Dr. Usui.Distance Reiki is the energy into their clients in their course.

#How To Use Reiki On Plants Sublime Useful Tips #What Is The Practice Of Reiki

[how2to18]

RACHEL KUSHNER’S FIRST TWO novels, Telex from Cuba (2008) and The Flamethrowers (2013), earned her a firm place in contemporary American letters. Like those, The Mars Room is an enormously ambitious project profoundly rooted in a particular time and place. Kushner’s intellectual gifts are prominent throughout her third novel, which traces the fates of characters delicately treading the line between desperate and hopeful before arriving at a cinematic conclusion.

Set deep in California’s Central Valley at the Stanville Women’s Correctional Facility from 2003 to 2008, The Mars Room tells the story of Romy Leslie Hall, who is serving “two consecutive life sentences, plus six years” for the murder of her stalker, Kurt Kennedy. The novel opens with her middle-of-the-night transfer to Stanville from L.A. County jail. Shackled on a bus with 59 other convicts, Romy only intermittently pays attention to the anxious interactions between the women and the guards as her mind drifts to her son, Jackson, who she’ll tell us later — as her internal tension mounts — is “the grain of reality in the center of her thoughts.”

Romy’s poignant account of her past is stripped of self-pity, yet it is painfully earnest and always direct. Here, for instance, she describes the first time she took drugs:

My first dabble in it was morphine, a pill that someone else melted in a spoon and helped me inject, a guy named Bill and I hadn’t thought that much about him or what the drug would be like but the careful way he tied off my arm and found my vein, the way the needle went in, so thin and delicate, the whole experience of this random guy I never saw again shooting me up in an abandoned house was exactly what a young girl dreams love can be.

Here and elsewhere the reader comes to understand that Romy has never been loved. She loves her son — Jackson is her everything — and she has pursued Platonic love, but her friends have inevitably, and without malice, made her life worse. No one has ever taken care of Romy or shown her kindness. And men — until she meets Conan, a female-to-male trans prisoner — have been consistently unkind.

The Mars Room is the name of the San Francisco strip club where Romy started working young. Of her time there, she tells the reader: “I said everything was fine but nothing was. The life was being sucked out of me. The problem was not moral. These men dimmed my glow.” This dimming was relentless, and the reader is made to see how woman after woman fell prey to it there. But Romy’s story also includes her heartbreaking rape at the hands of a wealthy, middle-aged man who spotted her on the street in the middle of a downpour and offered to help her get home but insisted she first follow him to his hotel room. At the time, she was 11 years old.

The unloved are this novel’s focus and purpose. The basic tenet of The Mars Room is that individuals do not exist. Each of us is defined by our relationships. If none of those relationships contains any love, we are doomed. Thus, the majority of Kushner’s characters now in prison were sentenced at conception.

It is a devastating message, and the book is not an easy read. The reader is consistently implicated, as when Romy says of her rape as a child,

You would not have gone. I understand that. You would not have gone up to his room. You would not have asked him for help. You would not have been wandering lost at midnight at age eleven. You would have been safe and dry and asleep, at home with your mother and your father who cared about you and had rules, curfews, expectations. Everything for you would have been different. But if you were me, you would have done what I did. You would have gone, hopeful and stupid, to get the money for the taxi.

Nor did Romy get justice when she went to court. The incompetent, overworked public defender assigned to her bungled every part of her case. Romy tells us, “The jury did not learn what Kurt had done to me, the tireless stalking, the waiting, the following, the calling, the calling again, the surprise appearances.” And so she was sentenced to spend what remained of her life at Stanville, away from her son and with no hope of reprieve.

By the time the prisoners arrive at Stanville, one of them has died. Inside, the rest are made to “slather” themselves in lotion “to kill lice and whatever else.” Although Romy attempts to intervene, a heavily pregnant 15-year-old named Button Sanchez is forced to follow this procedure, too, since she has not yet been officially designated pregnant. A horrific scene follows. Button goes into labor and is ignored by the guards as she “screams in agony.” When Romy and two other prisoners try to help, they are pepper-sprayed and forced into cages. Button’s baby is confiscated immediately, and she is given no time to recover. (She later adopts a bunny she catches in the prison yard, sewing it little clothes and playing with it until her cellmate Teardrop boils and eats it in front of her.)

Kushner structures the novel like interlocking Möbius strips that shift between different voices in first and third person. The narrative loops around and around, from character to character, as the reader learns more about the two women who tried to help Button, including Conan, the courageous trans prisoner who may be the brightest spot in the book. He is also the only positive masculine presence in a world otherwise plagued by male aggression of one kind or another.

Two characters double as proxies for the reader: Jimmy Darling, Romy’s documentary filmmaker boyfriend, who gives up on her when she gets arrested, and Gordon Hauser, who teaches a GED class at Stanville and develops complicated emotional relationships with female protégées. Gordon brings them seemingly innocuous contraband from the outside world, where he also researches their cases in his spare time. He learns, for example, that Button and two teenagers robbed a Chinese college student, beat him with a baseball bat, and left the scene without realizing they’d killed him. Gordon thinks,

The word violence was depleted and generic from overuse and yet it still had power, still meant something, but multiple things. There were stark acts of it: beating a person to death. And there were more abstract forms, depriving people of jobs, safe housing, adequate schools. There were large-scale acts of it, the deaths of tens of thousands of Iraqi civilians in a single year, for a specious war of lies and bungling, a war that might have no end, but according to prosecutors, the real monsters were teenagers like Button Sanchez.

But Gordon’s intermittent outrage never amounts to much since it tends to turn into self-pity, and his fascination with these women’s crimes — which is our fascination with these women’s crimes — feels a little creepy.

Part of what the looping structure of The Mars Room accomplishes is an emphasis on all relationships — not only loving and loveless ones, but also those we don’t even realize we’re in. The unintended consequences of every minor act of disrespect, of every little lack of consideration, may well be enormous. Kushner’s greatest achievement in this unique work of brilliance and rigor is to urge us all to take responsibility for the unconscionable state of the world in which we operate blithely every single day.

¤

Novelist and translator Jennifer Croft is a 2018–’19 Cullman Fellow at the New York Public Library. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, n+1, Guernica, Electric Literature, the New Republic, the Guardian, and elsewhere.

The post Sentenced at Conception: The Imprisoned and Unloved in Rachel Kushner’s “The Mars Room” appeared first on Los Angeles Review of Books.

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[illbefinealonereads]

Well this is back.

Notes from: chapter 3 & 4 (this book is still sooo tiring).

“He groaned and tightened his grip, pulling me so that I was completely on top of him. I could feel his erection pressing between my legs. I gasped at the feel of it, it was strange but it actually felt nice.” it’s just the third chapter, and this is the second time we’re hearing about his boners.. Can we not?

“I tried to wriggle free, but it just made us rub together in places that I would rather not think about my brother’s manwhore of a best friend touching.” EW.

There’s been some whisper-yelling in this chapter, and it warms my heart that it happened, and my hunch wasn’t wrong.

“Rolling over, I buried my face into his pillow, I could still smell him and it made me feel safe and calm. I drifted back to peaceful sleep for another hour.”  well that’s a sudden change of tone, we went from manwhore to this in 0.5.

“I forgot it’s Terri’s birthday tomorrow, and I have no idea what to get her!” Who’s Terri and where the fuck did she come fromt? Listen, random shit like this shall not be tolerated, especially when the only reason it’s here is to make it seem like this girl has something else to do beside bitch about/run after Liam. It’s stupid writing+dragging the fucking story. PICK A PACE DAMMIT.

Guess who solved the birthday gift problem in three sentences. That counts as rushing. She’s rushing through the dragging.

He’s flirting with her, and she’s not even noticing. Is this supposed to be cute?

““You’re getting better; you lasted at least a minute that last time,” he teased with his trademark smirk.”  In today’s edition of “Is It Teasing, or Is It a Compliment?” I‘m fucking confused.

A quarter of this chapter is dedicated to ice skating, and I bet that nothing else in this book is as detailed as this ice rink date that she doesn’t know is a date yet.

“If your brother finds out I’ve been with you all day he’ll cut my balls off,”

“As I started to fall again he bent down and scooped me into his arms, gripping one of his forearms firmly under my ass, and forced my thighs around his waist with the other hand as if I weighed nothing at all.” Are y’all seriously dry-humping in public right now?

“OK, now he is starting to freak me out. First he knew my shoe size, now he knows what I order at McDonalds?” Now you’re catching up. And wow, he’s so romantic.

“After dinner Jake and Liam went out and got some drink for the party as usual.” This is the opening sentence of chapter 4. It raises some questions, and it never answers them. Questions like ‘Did anyone proofread this?’; ‘Is “as usual” a good phrase to use at the end of any sentence?’ and ‘Why does this sound just weird?’

She’s sighing a lot in this chapter… like a lot a lot.

Our protagonist throws a hissy fit over a three minute exchange. Cause teenagers amirite.

“I dried my hair off, straightening it and applied my make-up. Again, I hardly ever wear any make up, even to parties, so I just added a little silver eye shadow and some mascara, switching my clear lip gloss, for pink.” Two things: 1. I copied this straight from the e-book, I didn’t edit that, the make-up and make up in two consecutive sentences are really there. And lucky I didn’t start counting spelling mistakes, but that would’ve taken far too much time. 2. For someone who hardly wears makeup, silver eye shadow is a bold move.

“I pulled on my midnight blue lacy bra and thong and looked through my closet.” Isn’t she 16? Who owns a thong at 16? Did her mom buy her one? How does one get one? And isn’t it a little stupid that this girl who slutshames her classmates for talking to boys dresses in such provocative strippery way? What I’m basically asking is how weird is it that someone’s mental diarrhea is giving me actual diarrhea?

“I pulled out a pair of black fairly short shorts and a tank top, then slipped on my silver long necklaces and my silver strappy sandals with a little heel.” Great. Now you look like a girl from an early 2000s rap video. When was this fucking book written again?

“and compared to the skanks he and Liam were used to hanging around with, I looked like a nun”

“he doesn’t like guys to look his little sister.” 

“Where’s Kate and Sarah?” Who are Kate and Sarah?

“I grabbed a cup and poured myself three quarters of a cup of Vodka and added a splash of orange juice, downing a shot of vodka whist I was still pouring.” Thanks for the recipe. Let’s review: 1/12 fl.ounce/approximately 2-3 mL of orange juice + ¾ cup/approximately 180 mL of vodka. And then there’s the shot of vodka which is 1 1/2 fl. ounces/44.36 mL…. That’s a whole fucking lot of vodka. I haven’t consumed that much vodka my entire life.

“After a couple of hours I was pretty drunk.”

“Don’t be so stupid, Kate.” Stop insulting these characters whose only crime so far is speaking. DAMMIT.

“The song changed to ‘She’s like a star’, by ‘Taio Cruz’ which is Liam’s favourite song.” Why is Taio Cruz in quotes? But also remember Taio Cruz? Remember that Dynamite song? I love that song. And Break Your Heart? Oh, that was a good song. What is he up to?

“Wait, did I just think about licking Liam like he was a Popsicle or something? I burst out laughing at my own idiocy. Liam pulled back and gave me a ‘what the heck’ face, which just made it funnier.” Your idiocy is no longer funny, but I do prefer drunk you if I’m being honest.

“I could feel him getting aroused but this didn’t bother me. Liam has been pressing his erections on me since I was twelve and he was fourteen.” That’s fucking disgusting. And we’re back to boner talk? Wasn’t this a YA romance, ffs? HOW IS THIS ROMANTIC?

Fuck it, here’s the rest of the boner talk in this chapter: “He wakes up with one every day, and most of the time falls asleep with one too. I just ignore it. It was weird the first time it happened and really freaked me out. He had gone home that morning, so embarrassed that he’d almost cried, he’d spoken to his dad about it and then came back the next night and explained that it was normal for boys to have it happen because he was growing and it was all to do with hormones. I didn’t know whether it was true or not, but I didn’t have any reason to doubt him. It was embarrassing for us both for a month or so, then it was a joke for a while, now we just ignore it completely.” Yeah, I’m reading this book so you don’t have to.

Fuck, I just found out I’m only 14% into this book.

“I just shrugged and left them to it, I don’t need to witness their fight, they’ll be making up in a couple of minutes anyway, they always do.” Her brother and her potential boyfriend are at each other’s throats, and this is her response?

So some random guy starts to kiss her, and she tries to push him off and fails (and I fucking hate that this shit is happening again, remember the prologue?), but Liam comes to help, which of course he does, and can we stop having this awful thing happen in this book over and over again? I’m still at the fourth chapter, and this has happened twice. You can reuse and plot point you want, but don’t reuse it multiple times in the same book.

“After about half an hour, I raised my head and looked at him, he was asleep and looked really peaceful and sweet, and not to mention hot.” Just make up your damn mind about the boy already. Do you love him, or do you hate him?

She liked his thumb and he moaned. And something’s tingling and throbbing inside her. This is some Fifty Shades shit right here. E.L. James is panicking right now.

Okay. Final tally for chapters 1 through 4:

That’s all so far.

#the boy who sneaks in my bedroom window #tbwsimbw #bitching about books #bitching mood #kirsty moseley #booklr