#and now im super afraid to use it!!! bc what if it is creepy?? i don't think it is?? help????? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

meowsticmarvels · 4 months

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whats on your mind rn in terms of Games ?

OOH FUN.... assuming you probably asked this bc most of my interests are games LOL but i jhave some Thoughts on games in General and the industry as a whole. buckle up!

- currently im playing. a lot of them obviously but my most recents are persona 5 tactica and the sims 4 :] - fav fav games EXCLUDING THE SPECIAL INTERESTS . - ghost trick, UT/DR, NITW, TS4 ( i havent played any other sims except the sims 2 pets for the 3ds im sorry.), super mario galaxy, goodbye volcano high - the special interest ones include pokemon (fav out of main series is sun/moon, black/white, and scarlet/violet, but i do like many spin offs like mystery dungeon), mii/wii games (i.e. wii sports), minecraft story mode, and the persona games (never finished one but i've reached various distances in P2IS-P5 excluding some spin offs and stuff like i havent started P5S or P2EP. favs r 3 + 4 + tactica) ^ ask me about any of those (or other ones i like i.e. gvh) i WILL ANSWER even if its something thatd be faster with google im better - underrated gems i'd say goodbye volcano high, death road to canada, chicory a colorful tale, signs of the sojourner, aviary attorney, tails noir, blanc. ghost trick to a lesser extent ig but the others are indie - current main wishlist (inc. ones i Will emulate): shin megami tensei V, devil survivor overclocked, fire emblem 3 houses, professor layton, pokemon black 2, persona q2, persona 3 reload ( I Want. Now. its on gamepass but i literally need everything related to it you dont get it.), wii play motion, twewy, and okami. OH also in stars and time and oneshot. also disco elysium and hylics look cool too. AND CASSETTE BEASTS. fuck i hate when every game looks good. need to play murder of sonic the hedgehog also. and looking forward to billy bust up. OH AND I NEED TO PLAY THE STANLEY PARABLE. AND BALDURS GATE 3 - i think the only game i really truly regret buying is 1-2 switch. im sorry it was good for like 2-3 weeks when the switch was new now i just do not care - i love you indie games i love you games that in general are not afraid to be weird and deviate from stuff. get crazy with it - video games r kind of an art form. if you think about it - industry kind of shit !!! stop laying off your devs!!!!!!!!!! what the fuck!!!!!! its been bad lately even my dad (a QA tester) got laid off a game he was working rly well on because they abruptly cancelled it. ok - i don't care for most FPS games. not my thing. too stressful. not enjoyable for me that much. im more of an RPG guy but i'm open to new things i played like food maker apps when i was a kid - speaking of industry stuff crunch is another thing severely a major problem. and the thing with sag aftra approving ai voices in games. Stop!!!!!!! - i miss e3 :( was a fun thing to look forward to each year - game preservation is also a real issue. like ig i get saving money by killing the servers on old consoles but in nintendos case people still actively use them theyre not that old. kind of dumb. xbox i get it the 360's been out since 2005 but 3ds/wiiu things are younger than me chill out - HATE when good fun mobile games are cash grabby. like STFU its more annoying than anything when they make resources impossible to get without paying. whats the fucking fun in that. i'd rather it be an easy way out last resort than oh i can get like 1 gem every month by doing this BUT if i pay i can get 10 of them for like 10 dolar. like ok die - waiter! waiter! more transgender as hell games please! (i.e. goodbye volcano high. that game changed lives) - also we need more autistic as hell games and i mean canonically. and not fucking Creepy Autism Simulator - more and better accessibility settings!!! i personally dont need many myself but it's important to me that others are able to play a game without severe issues due to disability. indie games doing great abt this based on feedback though ive seen a lot of good ones - any streetpassers in the chat thats all sorry it was long but i have a lot of thoughts abt Games in general. if theres any in particular u wanna hear abt shoot me an ask!!! can be one not on here i'm open to reccomendations or just things ive gathered from people who have :]

#sparky speaks #you CAN ask wga game it was that my dad was working on btw #its name was published dw #not maintagging fandoms #but #video games #games industry

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starberry-skies · 2 years

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idk i think there’s something to be said abt being an overenthusiastic ally. like obv the cishetallos aren’t perfect but.... it gets to the point where i don’t know if they’re being supportive bc they’re supposed to or if they actually care.

#something ive noticed abt trans ppl.....#(this is coming from an nb w no intentions to physically transition btw)#is whenever a cis person hears that someone is trans;; they go over the top w compliments. all abt physical appearance #its always oh ur transmasc? that's why youre so handsome manly etc etc #oh ur transfem? youre so pretty beautiful etc etc #yk?#maybe this is out of bounds for me #just a weird thing ive noticed #and it could be me picking up on things that arent there #forgive me if this is too much or smth #oh while im talking abt this #... sometimes ppl's positivity posts aren't positive .. :/#i mean like #at one point i was considering using this arospec label that i thought really fit me #then i was looking thru the tag on tumblr #''[label] is NOT creepy. idk why ppl think that [label] shouldn't belong in the aspec community''#smth like that #and i was like ha ha. huh??#and now im super afraid to use it!!! bc what if it is creepy?? i don't think it is?? help?????#whoops its wAIT TWO AM #I THOUGHT IT WAS ONE #shiiiiiiiiit #chirping

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badatusernames · 4 years

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CHOJI, SHIKAMARU, LEE, GAARA & HINATA!! ITS A LOT IM SORRY

THANK U FOR THIS...admittedly some answers may be a lil short just so i can like. Get to them all.

EDIT: IDK WHY IT LOOKS LIKE THIS. IM SO TIRED. IM SORRY ITS JUST A LONGASS NARUTO POST ON YOUR DASH I TRIED MY FUCKIN BEST YALL

SEND ME A CHARACTER AND I’LL DO THIS;

Chouji (man i’ve seen it spelled both ways and i’m just used to typing Chouji at this point sorry)

Sexuality Headcanon: Pansexual!! Gender Headcanon: Cis male A ship I have with said character: SHIKAMARU. SHIKAMARU. SHIKAMARU. SHIKAMARUUUU, my god...just, everything about their dynamic makes my heart melt, the way they’re both people who are easily dismissed by others and how they have such UNFALTERING FAITH in each other. chouji knows how much of a genius shikamaru is, knows very well the fact that despite his laziness, once he commits to something he’s in it for the LONG HAUL, the way shikamaru just believes so steadfastly in chouji, considering him stronger than NEJI FOR FUCKS SAKE...they like. get one another, the kind of relationship where you can be yakking away one minute and then just sitting in contented silence the next. they can just laze around. maybe play video games and snack. and sometimes...kiss. and it’s so chill even with that latent tenderness their later relationship develops and they both just feel so safe and KNOWN and familiar like. love your best friend. anyway everyone slept on shikacho and y’all should be ashamed the naruto fandom is enormous and finding pretty much ANY content for it is almost impossible aside from the small (if lovely and amazing) tag and i’m pretty hyperfixated on it if you couldn’t tell holy SHIT. A BROTP I have with said character: i’m really not a fan of ino taking potshots at him for his weight and outright shaming him, but once she grows out of that i absolutely love their friendship. listen, you know that post thats like--hold on

thats just them, thanks. A NOTP I have with said character: i have nothing against karui but canon is fucking dead to me and my opinions on p much all the “endgame” ships range from utterly neutral to absolute loathing. their relationship is on neither end of the spectrum, but. eh. definitely not into it. A random headcanon: he keeps nursing injured animals back to health because he’s just that fucking sweet and bringing them back to his house to keep them warm and safe while they recover and his team knows vaguely about this and ino and shikamaru like to poke fun at him for it but since they don’t tend to encounter said animals, it’s not really a huge deal.

of course they stop by his house one day bc he hadn’t shown up for training which is annoying and frankly a little concerning and finding the house mostly empty ino just bursts on into chouji’s room only to immediately have the opossum he’s been caring for latch its little paws on her face and cling.

it’s a bad morning. General Opinion over said character: literally one of my absolute favorites of all time and it really breaks my heart how overlooked he is in the fandom (seriously y’all...). i think kishimoto is kind of a stupid hack and the Fat Jokes are really grating and it sucks to see that so intrinsically tied to his character (like. just let him be fat. jesus christ) but his kindness and overall relaxed, loyal and lovable nature has me just melting. i adore him.

Shikamaru

Sexuality Headcanon: He’s gay, scoob. (I could also talk a lot about how his earlier misogyny is both a product of being a whiny tween and also some internalized frustration of like WHATS SO GREAT ABOUT GIRLS. UGH. I DONT. STOP TELLING ME IM GONNA FALL IN LOVE WITH ONE ONE DAY DAD JESUS. and let’s be real, thats frustrating, even if it aint an excuse) Gender Headcanon: he uses he/him pronouns because it’s just what he’s used to and comfortable with but man gender is such a drag... A ship I have with said character: SEE ABOVE SHIKACHO RANT A BROTP I have with said character: naruto! he and naruto have a really adorable friendship and i love love LOVE that he and chouji were shown to be kind and accepting of him even when most people were shunning him. also he’s so fucking dumb i love seeing shikamaru meticulously plan out something only to have naruto shriek into battle and ruin all of it. love those guys. stupid bros. A NOTP I have with said character: ok. im sorry i just. loathe sh*katema i really do. i haaaate the way kishimoto writes this whole “ew a GIRL” “ew a MAN” vibe with the like OOOH BUT THEYRE GONNA LIKE EACH OTHER vibe like.

don’t get me wrong i adore them as friends, i think they’re fantastic scathing and witty pals who bitch about anything and everything including each other

but they’re also both gay and kishimoto can suck my nuts byeeee A random headcanon: sometimes pakkun just fucking Shows up and chills with him. shikamaru wants absolutely no part of this but is way too lazy to like. do anything about it so it’s just this guy and a dog sitting in a field chillin and occasionally him piping up like ‘hey kid. remember when i bit your hand? yeah? haha, man time sure does fly.” while shikamaru is just. go aWAY. General Opinion over said character: if you told 9 year old me watching naruto for the first time my favs were gonna be a three way tie of lee, shikamaru and chouji i never would have fucking believed you but here we are. i love him. i absolutely love him. he’s such a whiny bastard and a really good depiction of burnout genius who doesnt want to do ANYTHING, but his intellect is an absolute DELIGHT to watch. i love him very much.

Lee

Sexuality Headcanon: he’s pan!! this is a boy that crushes easily and crushes hard on just about anyone!!!! Gender Headcanon: cis male A ship I have with said character: ok i ship him a lot with neji actually? what with how neji grows during the course of the series to regard lee with the respect he deserves is really sweet and there’s just something so infinitely adorable about him going around being the hammiest, most ridiculously earnest, kind and enthusiastic person and neji, now that he isn’t constantly bitter and angry at the world can finally really see that? lee is always happily dropkicking his way into his life, like he wouldn’t have it any other way, and i think that’s just...so sweet A BROTP I have with said character: SAKURAAAAA. oh my GOD do i adore their relationship. ever since lee saved her and basically just gave her a glimpse of his...lee-ness, the fact her negative opinion of him IMMEDIATELY flipped and gave her such a strong admiration and fondness for him kills me DEAD. she always treats him with so much respect and the fact she’s quick to rag on anyone making fun of him melts my HEART!! and on lee’s side, his little crush on her is adorable of course, but the sheer strength of the friendship that comes from it is more than infatuation could ever offer him. i want them to hang out together and talk about their troubles...i want them to make each other laugh and be so very kind to each other...i want sakura to storm over and throw him over her shoulder to TAKE A BREAK ALREADY when he’s been training too hard for too long. god. A NOTP I have with said character: honestly i’m pretty happy with a lot of lee ships! the only ones i view with obvious disdain are the ones with creepy age gaps honestly. A random headcanon: out of everyone in the leaf genin, he’s probably the closest anyone’s ever come to someone who EVERYONE is at least distantly friendly towards. like god have you SEEN how warm and inviting and concerned he is the SECOND he sees that naruto is feeling down? i get the sense he’s immediately inclined to provide that kind of support to any of his comrades, even the ones that Resist it.

you think sasuke is the most popular among the leaf genin? puh-LEASE. everyone looks on rock lee with at least a LITTLE bit of warmth. thats just fact. General Opinion over said character: since my first viewing of naruto he has been my Absolute fav, and while chouji and shikamaru are veeery close to stealing that spot, one look at him and i feel he’s gonna be on top forever. probably the best written character kishimoto’s ever produced that’s remained in the main cast (tho i dont speak for shipudden onwards who fucking knows, but the truth of it is is i adore rock lee)

Gaara

Sexuality Headcanon: Panromantic Asexual Gender Headcanon: kind of like shikamaru, i feel like he uses he/him pronouns but also doesn’t particularly....Care? A ship I have with said character: ok so it wasnt until my naruto rewatch that i really started falling into this but i think him and naruto are super cute? while i loathe kishimoto for ruining so much abt this show he really is good at creating good foils to naruto, and gaara is no exception--and the way naruto changes his life by just kicking his ass (and proving he’s not just a Simp or smth) and then just, extending genuine empathy and a REAL sense of truly relating to where he’s coming from re:his upbringing? the EFFECT it has on him, bro!!!! my god!!! i feel like they’re that opposites attract ship that don’t clash constantly but instead fall into this adorable synergy and understanding? and i think thats so sweet A BROTP I have with said character: ...is it cheating to just put temari and kankuro here? bc they are literally his siblings but my GOD do i love their relationship. there’s something so deeply sad about their initial situation??? like having siblings that either are deeply fucking afraid of you or clearly don’t care for your well being whatsoever, it’s such a tragic scenario, and the times where they really do show legitimate care for gaara just breaks my heart...but the GROWTH. THE DEVELOPMENT. THE HEALING. i love the sand siblings so much, i am a STRONG advocate of seeing the development from estranged family to loving, occasionally bickering siblings who absolutely Love Each Other A NOTP I have with said character: uhhhh same with lee in that i don’t really mind most of the ships i’ve seen him in? while i don’t particularly ship gaalee i think its also Very Cute, and really it all just seems pretty valid as long as people aren’t being creepy? A random headcanon: i’ve been wracking my brain for one for a good 20 minutes and i just don’t have one he’s such a mystery to me/????? i love him but he is an enigma?? General Opinion over said character: oh my god he’s such an edgelord in the beginning. i’ve been doing a lot of this naruto rewatch with my friend @drashseed (a simply phenomenal fella 10/10 follow him) and every single time he talked the only valid response just became “ok gaara”

but his backstory? utterly HEARTWRENCHING. and his growth is just. absolutely divine, i adore him. thank you mister sandman for doing so much for us all.

Hinata

Sexuality Headcanon: Bisexual Gender Headcanon: cis woman A ship I have with said character: listen. i think kibahina is........Really Really cute. he cares about her so MUCH??? and there’s a certain tenderness to his interactions with her that’s just really evident whenever you see em together? i really love that you get the sense hinata is COMFORTABLE around him!!! like! i feel like hinata really deserves to have a partner who sees her when she ISN’T blushing and stammering? when she’s like? legitimately comfortable and being HERSELF? (dgmw the blushing is adorable i fucking love her but its one of the gripes i have with naruhina that so much of it is just naruto being oblivious and her having a small panic attack) the comfort she and kiba have make for a chill, adorable relationship i just cry over constantly A BROTP I have with said character: so i was GONNA put naruto here, but technically i already put him there for shikamaru’s so i’m gonna say neji!!! uhhh OBVIOUSLY they got off to a. very rough start but the way their dynamic changed (or perhaps in a way reverted back to the times they interacted before neji’s father died and temporarily killed his Human Decency) into this respect and fondness that’s just...such a delight to watch? i’m a SUCKER for slow and mutual reconciliation and there are just so many sweet moments between them. they are FAMILY, BRO!!! THEY CARE FOR EACH OTHER, BRO!!!!!!!!!! A NOTP I have with said character: ...at the risk of sounding like a broken record, i think a lot of hinata ships are quite cute? i guess i’m gonna have to say sasuke. because like.

has. he ever even looked at her. please. jesus christ. she deserves so much better. A random headcanon: she is a LOT physically stronger than she looks!! a lot of her combat techniques rely on taijustu after all so it’d make sense that she puts a lot of effort into physical training alongside chakra control.

i’m trying to say she’s strong. not as strong as sakura but. she can lift her bf up over her head (he’s dying hes dying he’s dYING he lOVES HER SO MUCH). it’s pretty fuckign badass

General Opinion over said character: i LOVE her??? honest to god i really really do--honestly while i dislike the direction they went in canon with her, i really loved seeing her be motivated to grow and change the parts of herself she hated to become a stronger person.

that and she’s so fucking cute and sweet and i just??????? bless her honestly.

#naruto #shikacho #narugaa #nejilee #kibahina #they speak #i cant tag everyone fuck #is this formatting fucked up? i can't tell it wouldnt post before #long post

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desolationlovers · 3 years

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oh yall thought i was done x posting? lol. kamui character rant under the cut

the thing about kamui is i dont know that hes a very deep character??atleast not how clamp has written him and esp not in the manga.

he spends a lot of the manga being confused and often manipulated. and hes really just a kid.

his first big character arc is debastardization basically. when hes introduced hes a TOTAL asshole (the anime added scenes to make him more of a dick at the start but also has a bit of an explaination? ill get to it). hes shown as very rude to everyone around him, yelling at people to get out of his way or get lost, including his previous friends. hes also shown to have absolutely no care for his surrondings and regularly fights and uses his powers in places where bystanders could be injured and leaving roads bridges or nearby buildings in ruins. when confronted about the latter by hinotos knight (his name is saiki) he straight up says he doesnt care if anyone gets hurt. which i mean ok nothing wrong with a character being an asshole. the extreme in your face way kotori and fuuma describe kamui as a kid being very shy and Very quiet and gentle makes this characterization confusing but hey people can change i guess. the confusing part is that as kamui slowly beings to let his guard down he says that the big reason he was so standoffish especially wrt kotori and fuuma was because he wanted to keep them at a distance so they wouldnt get involved with all the end of the world stuff. which makes sense obviously! kamui was absolutely aware of how dangerous it might get. his entire plan was to get the shinken (the sacred sword) and bail because he didnt want any part of any of it. what i dont get is why he was totally cool with bystanders being injured or killed. during his fight with saiki they were in a neighborhood! on people roofs and shit!! saiki is the one to lead them to an abandoned construction site so no one gets caught in the crossfire. and kamui almost kills saiki!!! which i will let slide a bit because kamui was being followed and had been attacked by spells literally that morning. but later on he apologizes to saiki but never explained his reasoning why he didnt care about destroying peoples houses??? and its never brought up again?????? also theres a scene added to the anime where he kicks the shit out of kotori and fuumas dad??? because he wouldnt give kamui the sword?? bro thats ur best friends dad you jackass!!!!!

in the anime they added flashbacks for the time after he moved away from tokyo which i think make his whole character make much more sense. when he first moves and goes to a new school he accidentally uses his powers and makes everyone afraid of him. fast forward past elementary school to high? school? its unclear. at school hes a lazy slacker that never goes to class and never talks to anyone, big ol loner. he sees that a local gang has been stealing kids money and beating them up. so he decides to put on a tough guy persona and confront the gang telling them to knock it off and scaring them shitless with some fun ass kicking psychokenesis. now i am SO on board with this addition. kamui being ostrisized for being weird and scary when hes already a super shy kid, so he embraces this scary intimidating image and tries using it for good because hes still ultimately kind hearted. he gets too absorbed in this tough guy persona that he loses touch with the original purpose of it and just uses it as a shield because he himself is afraid and confused. and maybe even hiding behind it because hes so afraid of having this huge destiny that he doesnt know if he can live up to and how can someone who decides the fate of the world be just some quiet oversensitive guy.

except all of that is my own speculation and analysis because they really do not go into ANY detail about this. i wouldnt say its to the point where it feels like they just flipped a switch and hes nice now but it def feels like that. and it annoys me because after he kind of apologizes for being a dick it doesnt really get brought up again?? i think he broods over it once or twice. but i would have really liked to see flashes of it coming back in high stress situations or something? he has a lot of points of grief and depression but its always meloncholic rather than angry and it really makes him feel like two different characters i wish it was way more of a mix.

anger would also be good with the whole overarching theme of trying to break out of the path destined for you. its constantly said that theres only one future by the dreamgazers although hinoto wants to change it. its supposed destined that kamui will lose and earth will be destroyed. anger but more importantly PASSION is whats needed break out of what has been preordained and to carve your own path. passion is also whats needed for the main part of the second half of kamuis character arc, figuring out what it is he REALLY wants. what his true wish is.

i also think anger could have been a good inverse to the deliberate mirroring of kamuis character and subarus character. subaru really represents despair and being completely swallowed by grief. his story is that the man he fell in love with (named seishiro) was just manipulating him for fun and is actually an emotionless assassian. subaru is so destroyed by this realization he goes into a depression and because of this is unable to save his sister being killed by seishiro. his goal is literally to be enough of a nusance to seishiro that hell kill him. literally he wants to be acknowledged as important enough to bother killing. its pointed out often how subaru and kamui are so similar, with how fuuma killed kotori, and how theyre both kindhearted ro a fault. its an intentional reflection. subaru even pulls kamui out of a similar depressive state after kotori dies. he and kamui have a whole heart to heart about how some peoples happiness can look pitiful to others and how hes going to fufill his goals even when other people are worried for him. and most importantly about how not everyone can be happy with an outcome. i think it would have been really good for subaru to represent someone overcome with depression about how awful the world is and paralyzed with that sadness and kamui would be the rightous anger and compassion needed to actually change the world. “lets this radicalize you rather than lead you to despair” you know? it would have been a really good parallel considering part of x’s themes are literally about having compassion for humanity. but that reading possibly shoots itself in the foot because the language used wrt the two possible futures are things to stay as they are or for a “revolution” to occur, meaning killing everyone to let the earth heal. so ideas of change are insinuated to be connected with the seven angels and genocide. which uh. not going to get into that.

i do like when he starts going to the clamp school he goes back to being shy and quiet and kind of gets pushed around by people with more force of personality. very fun uncomfortably relatable. its ok man im extremely passive too.

anyway final thoughts kamui needs more passion. clamp give me the rights. also let subaru and kamui hang out and have a brotherly bond. no creepy shit. just subaru being an akward older brother that knows what kamuis going thru and gives bad advice bc he has god awful coping mechanisms.

side note we arent ever told about his likes/dislikes hobby or anything of that nature. the blankest of slates. so my city now. i think hes into obscure indie music and has thousands of hours in various life sim games like animal crossing and stardew valley.

#lees posts #forgot to post this last night #clamp posting

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lethbians · 4 years

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can you explain what's going on right now? i keep seeing big IT blogs talking about some discourse or something but i have no idea what they're talking about other than it involves you lol

alright i like. i truly do not like having diScOurSE out in public because i’m not one to air out my dirty laundry 24/7 but seeing as how it was brought into public against my will i feel like the least i can do is clear up the situation for those who’ve been seeing the posts.

i’m putting this under the cut bc it’s long. tws for some biphobia, brief mention of transphobia and, at the end, a rape mention.

so if you don’t know: hi, i’m migz, i’m an it fandom blogger. its okay, i know, its really cool. part of my shtick here is that i like to turn normal thirst tags into works of art for the sake of comedy. perhaps you’ve seen some of my highlights from my “fhg” tag - perhaps your brain has been spared. either way, it became kind of “my thing” around the third or fourth week (mid nov) of me having this blog. at first, i tagged just about every ask i got mentioning the thirst tags with “bill hader” - they had to do with him, so why not tag him? it would draw more like minded people! about two days into that i got a message asking me to tag my nsfw. i am a big dumb idiot, and apologize for not initially doing it. i havent had a following bigger than like 10 in several years and completely spaced on basic etiquette. so by the end of november i was tagging everything applicable with “notsfw” and “bill hader”.

now you’re caught up.

on december 1st i got this message from user billhaderanti:

now i want to start by saying i absolutely was in the wrong here. i didn’t even think about how many people were being subjected to the asks i was getting - especially ones who had no idea they were all jokes. i don’t track the bill hader tag, so it just didn’t even occur to me - that’s ignorance on my part, and to anyone who was subjected to the terrors of me before my tagging system: i am genuinely sorry. i relay the same sentiment in my response, though you can tell i’m on edge.

and they replied:

clearly they Were offended by it but thats.. not the point. at this point, im feeling Really weird about the whole interaction, but still understanding, because again - i GET it. i know my posts are gross - that’s the point. it doesn’t make it excusable, though, which is why i understand why people are offended. so i responded with the only solution i Knew would keep us both safe and happy posting on our own blogs.

so i thought this would be the end of things! i’d been pretty anxious lately already since i’d started to receive anons telling me i was gross and whore-ish for thirst posting in this way (i delete all of those, so if ur thinking about sending one, i guess no one’s stopping you but it won’t be seeing the light of the dashboard). i’m unsure if it was immediately or a few hours later, seeing as how i have a bad concept of time and the post-dates are right on the edge between nov 30 and dec 1, but i went to their blog - because anyone who has been on the internet knows the opportunity to vague post is near irresistible. and...what do ya know

fair! it’s their blog. however i am an emotionally fragile egg girl and immediately got freaked out. the odds that they were the only one who thought this were low. and, again, i’ve been very open on my blog about how important it is to respect boundaries; my posts are absolutely prone to breaking those boundaries people have created for themselves.

so i made my own, semi-vague post, letting my following know (and i’m pretty sure i’d answered asks about it before, but this is going to be long enough w/o me searching those up too) that i understood if they wanted to block me or unfollow or whatever - people need to create their own safe spaces. the tension is pretty clear in the tags, i’m not trying to hide that. i felt that the way this woman slid into my dm’s was pretty abrasive (just my opinion/how it made me personally feel) and i let myself be a lil emotional about it in the tags of my post.

alright! maybe this is the end. maybe we both go our separate ways and post happily on our own blogs... except it’s not the end. later in the day (some of this was happening like 1/2am, so now its Day day, i believe - again, not good w time passage lol)

clearly, i’m upset. my groupchat double checked that i didn’t get too emotional in my response - did i mention im anxious about discourse lol - and apparently.. it did the trick. she didn’t message me again. great. it was over.

at this point, i decided i needed to make an even bigger change. so a few days after i’d calmed down i created an entirely new tag for my thirst posts so if people hadn’t already hidden the notsfw posts or just blocked me outright, they’d have a third option to escape the madness. at this point, id had my blog about 6? weeks, but there were still 2k posts for me to sift through - some of them were completely untagged. i also had to do it post by post, because one of xkits features - the mass re-tagger - was getting blogs deleted for some reason, and i wasn’t going to do that. so i spent a few days going through all 2k+ posts, adding the “fhg” tag.

YEEHAW! a brand new tagging system, no more hopping into the bill hader tag (minus one or two really funny, not super explicit asks, like the bill hader farquaad meme), and, tbf, i’d completely put this woman out of my mind. i don’t seek out drama and do my best to stay in my lane. yesterday, i checked my activity for the first time in awhile since id put out a couple new original posts that had started to get traction and i Love reading tags. i noticed a mutual had @’d me, and realized i havent checked my @’s in...ever, maybe. i see a post from my good pal billhaderanti.

since i dont follow them and never check my @’s, i’d completely missed it. however, once i did see it, i was horrified. id gone through all that fucking work to keep my blog My Blog and also respect everyone’s boundaries and it still hadn’t been enough. i’d been awake for almost 24 hours and went. a little crazy. and i didn’t reply immediately because i just had no words. i sent it to my friends because i... i just wasn’t going to be able to figure it out myself.

there’s a lot to unpack in this post alone, but whatever, i’m gonna put my own grievances with the immaturity of 1. making a callout post to begin with when i’d been nothing but civil 2. making a callout post about something as (in the grand scheme of Life) minor as some tags where i refer to a someone’s genitals as a “whack pack” and 3. making a callout post in such a rude way - aside. at the end, she calls me (and whoever else!) a demonic mlw (man loving woman, we assumed, and then later confirmed with a post further back on her blog).

which - yeah, we started scrolling. at first we were looking for more vague blogs, and then we just...started finding things. billhaderanti is a self proclaimed lesbian separatist, which... fine. but it’s already pretty clear that this woman hates me on some level simply because i am a bi woman (demonic mlw, remember!) which is just. damn man i can’t believe we are still fighting the biphobic fight lol. so the more we scrolled, the more we uncovered - and not just the biphobic / vaguely mtf transphobic things they posted (or put in tags), but we also found that they had their OWN thirst tags. certainly not as hyperbolically comedic as mine, but they were there, talking about his body and his person the same (and, frankly, a bit creepier for other reasons) as mine.

there’s one post in particular that snatched my wig in it’s creepiness - and i say creepiness in the sense that it feels personal. like this woman feels like she knows bill to some degree where she can say these things. my tags have always had a sense of distance, as they’re written for humor. and maybe this particular post was written for comedic purposes, but it doesn’t read that way, and if it WAS, then she has no right to call ME out for MY comic tags and posts.

i’ll let it speak for itself, mostly because i don’t want to read it again.

i also won’t be going through her blog again to find the posts with biphobic and other Interesting:tm: tags because there are plenty and i just really! want to be done with the whole ordeal! her blog is public and i’m sure you can all find it and look to your heart’s content.

feeling a bit feral and a bit pissed off now that we knew the depth of how rotten this woman’s vibes were, a couple of my pals made a post or two similar to what my tag’s are like except turned up to eleven (if possible) - and tagged them with “bill hader” (and notsfw!!). yes, a bit childish, but at this point, the entire situation was childish, and making jokes was truly the only way we were going to get through it. another vague post went up on her blog soon after.

talking down to us, calling us children, and then for whatever reason calling us virgins... whatever, weird post. around this time most of us (est) went to bed, because it was nearing 3 or 4 in the morning.

and then today happened. i woke up fresh and ready for the day after a wonderful 4 hours of sleep and found that jane had made an incredibly intelligent post in response to the situation. i won’t ss it, but i’ll LINK in case you missed it. attached there in the reblog is my own response. i think they can speak for themselves.

after that, things were kind of jumbled, since i wasn’t online a lot and when i was i was Not checking my activity simply because i was afraid of what i’d see. for the most part, it ended up just being support (which i am very grateful to all of you for - it means a lot that you all enjoy my content to any degree).

there was some more vague posting from both “““““sides”””””” of the “““““argument”””””” - mostly just people restating the fact that this is a public space and we should All be aware of how we effect others. i still hadn’t heard directly from billhaderanti, so i assumed we’d all be dropping and disengaging and moving on. i still wasn’t blocked, though, so who really knew what would happen.

eventually, it culminated in this last post. tw for mentions of rape

i’m going to start by saying that

1. there are nearly no teenagers that were involved in this. im turning 23 in january and most of my friends are 20+. maybe one or two are 19.

2. none of us sent any sexually violent asks - most of us didn’t send asks at all. i believe one or two of my friends admitted to sending asks however they assured me their nature wasn’t bad; as far as i know, everyone remained civil in whatever went on (again, unclear to me as to what was being sent; no one was actively posting or talking about it. if billhaderanti wishes to elaborate, they can, but i don’t have anything to put in).

3. before i finish this, i would like to apologize to billhaderanti. as a comedian - not just my stupid tags, i mean in real life, too - i know that humor can hurt. it’s not always funny, it’s not just stupid hahas. sometimes things that are supposed to be jokes just hit people differently and cause bad things. i recognize that. i never meant to trigger you (if you’re reading this) or cause you any severe mental/emotional harm. i apologize for my humor bringing up your trauma, and i never meant for that. regardless of my own thoughts and opinions about the nature of my posts/the thirst tags themselves, they hurt you, and i’m sorry.

anyway, i’m going to wrap this up (i’m bad at endings, what can i say! steven king and i took the same writer’s class!). if you read all this... sorry. i probably won’t be taking any asks about it, because i find the whole “drama” of this to be stupid and rooted in some seriously biphobic issues this fully grown woman has.

tldr; i attempted to contain my blog so this woman could exist and function safely on her blog, but it wasn’t enough for her, so she called me out, and then some of the fandom called Her out for being biphobic and mean and overall just immature about the situation. as of now, she’s yet to block me, though her and her wife have blocked a few of my friends. her wife continues to clown on my friends. this post was made for clarity’s sake. the end, i’m getting a drink.

#discourse #biphobia tw #transphobia tw #rape tw #ok goodbye im done with this im back to #only posting gay clown movie #Anonymous

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seolcs · 4 years

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°✧｡× : ( moon gayoung + cis female + she / her ) ─── welcome to roselake village , SEOLA LIM ! oh , well , i suppose you’ve been here for ALL YOUR LIFE , so perhaps you already know your way around the town . well , you are the TWENTY THREE year old LIBRARIAN , though , right ? the harvest sprites told me about you ! they said you DO believe in the harvest goddess . oh , my . well , that explains why they also said you’re quite BEWITCHING and SEDULOUS , but can also be a bit ENIGMATIC and MERCURIAL . either way , you should be a wonderful addition to our island ! i guess i’ll leave you to it now , but if i need you , i suppose i’ll just look for you at THE MAGIC SHOP , yeah ? we hope you love it here as much as we do ! oh , and remember not to go into the tulsy woods ! the distorted hum of opera music just out of reach , dirt caked underneath fingernails , eyes that know more than lips tell ! ✧

━ ˙ ˖ ☆ QUICK STATS !

full name : seola lim .

nickname(s) : lala ( yea like the teletubby ... it was a childhood nickname </3 )

zodiac : pisces sun , virgo moon ( click ! )

sexuality : bisexual .

occupation : librarian & witch .

birthplace : roselake village , maine .

current residence : roselake village , maine .

━ ˙ ˖ ☆ BACKSTORY ! ( tw : vague mentions of an accident )

she’s a fraternal twin <3 if u read julie’s intro u know , but seola and sora are the daughters of roselake’s mayor ! she was born a whole ten minutes after her sister so she takes pride in not being the hag ... sora is so brave for her sacrifice

so their dad is the mayor ! he’s been roselake’s mayor for a while now , keeps getting reelected bc why fix something that seems to be working right .. aha more about that later ... & their mom is a witch ! only on the down low though , she’s not open about practicing magic & is much better known for and adored for her philanthropy around roselake ! both sora and seola have the ability to use magic , but while the gift seemed to come naturally to sora , seola high key struggled with it /:

their mom was a very patient teacher but that didn’t stop seola from feeling inferior to both her sister as well as her powers in general . she very much felt like a big flop , and as a kid & preteen she struggled a lot with jealousy and frustration and just feeling second best in a sense ? basically she really felt like she was letting everyone down when in reality the only person who was putting pressure on her was herself

in good old 2010 ... 13 year old seola & sora snuck into tulsy woods ( even though their dad always said never to go in there ) to play around with their magic , got into an argument , and that’s when seola accidentally ended up hurting sora really really badly ):

after the accident seola wanted to give up magic forever , but her mom convinced her that the best way for her to get over her fear of ever hurting someone again was to practice . so while sora got closer to their father , who had covered up the accident in the woods and used it to spread his own agenda , seola got much closer with their mom

determined to get better at controlling her abilities and also super terrified that she’d hurt someone like she’d hurt her sister if she didn’t , seola practiced and practiced ... then she practiced some more . while most people her age were going through high school focused on going to college afterwards , seola was counting down the days til she’d be free to do nothing but learn as much as she could about being a witch

it was around this time she also started to get ... suspicious about her dad and his intentions . she was grateful that he didn’t tell the truth about the accident , scared ppl would have viewed her as a monster if they knew what really happened , but the way her dad was acting about tulsy woods was super suspicious especially with everything happening with the harvest goddess and the sprites . basically ... seola suspects he might have something to do with whatever’s going on in the woods ... 👁️👁️

after high school seola stayed in roselake ! she didn’t go to college like sora , much to her dad’s dismay , but she did take some online classes here & there ( mysticism and rituals , alchemy , some history ones , as well as a medieval monsters literature class ... just for fun <3 ) she also snagged a job at subtext as a librarian , mainly for that sneaky access to all the secret garden books

initially she’d just been curious about her own magic , since she knows it doesn’t come from the harvest goddess like a sprite’s magic does , but with everything going on she’s extended her research to include both the goddess & the sprites to see if maybe she can understand whatever her dad is trying to do in roselake

━ ˙ ˖ ☆ PERSONALITY + TIDBITS !

not 2 be cliche but she really is a mysterious girl SJDBWJBDJW since she’s haunted by the idea that she’s essentially always on the brink of losing control and hurting someone again like she did with her sister , she’s got a very elusive personality . she tries her best not to get too close with anyone , but unfortunately for her it’s the kind of cool and detached air about her that usually makes people curious to know her , especially since her twin sister is so seemingly open & very focused on her reputation in roselake . seola’s always tells herself stuff like oh to be a fly on the wall ... 😔 but the reality is she doesn’t want to be invisible to people at all , she’s just traumatized from the accident in tulsy woods /:

so you have her enigmatic persona ... versus her deep desire to be understood and loved despite whatever dangerous and uninhibited thing she’s convinced lurks around inside her . yeah ... she’s not so good at following her own don’t get too close with people rule SJDBWJDJW most of the time what ends up happening is her pushing those who are already close away , only to reach for them again later , only to push them away ... you get it . it’s easy to write her off as a moody rich girl if you’re not in her circle , but it’s deeper than that

she’s got a bad habit of fixating on things and then letting them consume her . sometimes it works to her benefit , like focusing so hard on practicing her magic and finally becoming good at it . most of the time , though , her curiosity morphs into obsession , and it’s very easy for her to get overwhelmed and feel lost

she has a big old soft spot for creepy or spooky things and people , 100% believing that more often than not the stuff we’re afraid of is stuff we just don’t understand . sometimes , though , her attraction to the “ dark ” is a manifestation of her own internalized belief that there’s something wrong with her & that she’s just as capable of bad as she is good ... cannot believe freud just possessed my body like that 😳

if she was an animal she’d for sure be a cat JSBDJWBDJW comes & goes as she pleases ... affectionate & warm on her own terms ... sometimes she brings people weird gifts that are only really gifts in her eyes ... yea <3

high key has a huge guilt complex bc of that juicy unresolved childhood trauma ! that and the fact that she’s pretty sure her family is responsible for hurting so many other’s in roselake ... it’s a lot . so even though she’s not as warm and friendly as sora is , she’s just as kind ... maybe even too kind sometimes , she just feels like she has a lot to prove & make up for yk

voted most likely to dump you & say it’s not you , it’s me ):

big fan of creating ambiance she’s all about turning of the big lights and turning on a lamp ... maybe lighting some candles if she’s feeling crazy idk ...

if you don’t know she’s a witch you probably think seola’s about to drop the hottest skincare line of 2020 because she do be collecting those herbs and oils

━ ˙ ˖ ☆ WANTED CONNECTIONS ! ( all open to all genders )

BEST FRIENDS : technically sora is always gonna be her number one best friend 🥺 but i would really love for seola to have at least one person who really truly knows her , someone she’d drop anything for to help them if they needed & vice versa !

CHILDHOOD / FAMILY FRIENDS : open to muses that grew up in roselake ! maybe their parents are friends , or maybe they were just neighbors or in the same classes in elementary school . i have ... lots of ideas for this trope hehe <3 give me someone who seola pushed off the swings when they were tiny and now they’re still sworn enemies to this day ... childhood friends that stayed close , but after the accident in tulsy woods seola distanced herself , someone who was technically her first love who she probably had a little wedding ceremony with when they were like five with candy rings , childhood friends that grew apart and now it’s sad and awkward , childhood friends that stayed close and have embarrassing stories to tell about each other ... i’ll stop here JSDBJWD

CONFIDANTS : the one person seola keeps finding herself talking to about the things she usually keeps inside & they do the same with her . i think it’d be funny if both of them find it weird to do things like go out to lunch or shop together because that’s�� not what they’re used to

SUBTEXT : people who know her from the library ! maybe your muse spends a lot of time there so they recognize seola ( or maybe they even go just to see her ) , maybe your muse needed help finding something once and seola helped them out & now they’re kinda pals , or maybe your muse is someone seola’s requited to help her out with her own research with the secret garden books

FRIENDS THAT DATED : maybe things just ended amiably between them , or maybe it’s like an “ everyone told us we should date so we tried it and boy was that the weirdest thing we ever did ” situation . either way the outcome is they’e still friends <3

CAHOOTS : what is this you might ask ? someone seola can be in cahoots with . she has a possibly dangerous idea that no one else is likely to say yes to ? she goes to your muse . your muse has an idea no one in their right mind would say yes to ? they go to seola . these two are in cahoots !

BAD INFLUENCE : i’d love for someone who’s trying to get seola to dabble into darker magic / abandon her quest to figure out what’s going on in the woods and save the harvest goddess . she’s pretty hard to sway if she thinks she’s doing the right thing , so bonus points if your muse is good at manipulation and has a convincing case that’s more than just oooh be bad ;)

SPRITES & MAGICAL BEINGS : sorry human muses ... these are not for you </3 i would love if any of the other witches / wizards helped seola on her journey to practice her magic and get better at it ! maybe someone who knows what really happened with sora in the woods but still decided to help her / not judge her , OR maybe someone who knows what she did and is now scared of her / doesn’t think she should be doing magic still at all . as for sprites i think seola would be super curious about them & the harvest goddess , so maybe some sprites who are willing to talk about their abilities with her and their connection to the goddess with her & are maybe even working with her to try and figure out what’s going on in roselake . then on the reverse of that maybe sprites who think seola’s too nosy for her own good , or who don’t trust her because they’re also starting to get suspicious about the mayor , or maybe they just don’t trust any magic that doesn’t come from the harvest goddess

MAYOR LIM : if you’re trying to get to her father for whatever reason , sora’s definitely the easier ticket in , but maybe your muse is trying to be less obvious about it so they try through seola ! i would also ... really love someone she can sneak off with during town events where her dad is involved when she’s supposed to be with her family promoting that shiny lim reputation hehe

SISTER SISTER : connections through sora ! this is ... always the best part of having a sibling in the same rp you get to make connections through them so give me all sorts of stuff it could be dramatic like your muse hurt sora & now seola hates them or it could be wholesome too ! not 2 be cliche but ... love triangle anyone ... just kidding ... unless ? 🙈

THE BIG EX : seola’s first real relationship , and first real heartbreak . everyone before them had been an unofficial thing , but your muse was the real deal . maybe one or both of them ruined it by being too scared of their feelings to stick around , maybe secrets and insecurities got the best of them , maybe one of them was willing to try but the other wasn’t . either way it ended badly , and whether those feelings are resolved or not ... the world is our oyster baby !

HOOKUPS : friends with benefits and it’s not awkward between them , friends with benefits and it’s super weird between them because they may be crossing over into real feeling territory , one night stands / hookups that were huge mistakes , one night stands or hookups that were or are being kept secret for whatever reason , someone who leads seola on but never gets serious about her , or someone she leads on but she never gets serious about because every time they get close to anything real she’s pushing them away

WILL THEY WON’T THEY : a friendship that always teeters on the line of something romantic ! maybe they’re both oblivious to the chemistry / tension or maybe they’re aware of it because they get jealous when they hear about the other being with someone else … maybe they refuse to do anything about it because they don’t want to complicate things or maybe they purposefully cross lines when they feel that jealousy … could be more angsty or it could be more wholesome depending on which way it goes 😈

i wont lie to u ive been writing this all day ... but we finally made it baby 😭😭😭 im sosososo sorry for the length & the wait ... also i feel like my charas always change a lil once i actually start plotting & writing so sorry again if u see me finally writing as seola on the dash and ur like lit rally who is that ... JSDBWJBDWBDJ please come message me on discord to plot ! @ seulgi ily ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ#8172 maybe ... give this a like if u wanna … do that ? thank u for reading all this ur so brave for that stay sexy stan loona x

#╰ ♡ . 𝒏𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒆𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒚 ── ooc !#no words ... intro full </3 #the princess diaries said a queen is never late ... i am not a queen though -__-#wisteria.intro

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theskyexists · 5 years

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she-ra season 3

i LOVE scorpia

this show has a bit of tonal issue in my opinion. they keep going back to a very teen-parent relationship between the trio and mum - when there’s a terrible war on.

people get killed but generally it really does just feel presented like a game or a fight about curfew and sometimes thats a bit jarring. (or is it strange to expect the graveness of situations to bring out a quality of sincerity even during puberty?)

i don’t really understand why Adora would jump to the conclusion that Shadoweaver showing up means she’s changed

but Adora, you ARE stupid. lol

but the rest is too. ‘don’t listen to her Adora’ why not? is it so terrible to be from another world? the stakes are quite murky

Entrapta’s comments really go to show how shit of a leader Hordak really is. HOw the hell did he manage to create this empire when he’s so damn incompetent? OOOHHHHHH CATRA SAID IT!!! just after i wrote that sentence she SAID IT

Hordak is an idiotic beserker

so why didn’t they take their unicorn flying steed?

‘well yeah - but you said that while saving us - so - you can’t be all bad. what do ya say’

i love the voice actor for Adora lolololol. she is clearly having SO much fun.

and Adora has a small crush on Huntara and absolutely ruins her chances with the barmaid by popping up. totally did not expect that voice for Huntara tho

entraptak is.....real. wtf. it’s.....cute. Hordak is just trying to be Prime. Failing at it miserably, lashing out. jfc it’s an endless cycle isn’t it.

‘know about she-ra? ahahahaha! I AM she-ra!’ THAT WAS BADASS. i love it when Adora is being rowdy and cocky

oh wow reversed chin-tilt with sword, and then lifting her head and soulful look? She-Ra really has chemistry with ALL the Princesses.

I LOVE scorpia. i loved that moment when Catra pushed her away nobly - i love how Catra has plausible deniability to herself. Love how the narrative reinforces that Catra is literally the most competent person around etc. (if they could get her for the Rebellion it would be over and out but hey)

surely Mara cut Aetheria off to save it from Hord-Prime’s war? Light-Hope wanted She-Ra to join the other She-Ra’s (’this world’s she-ra’) in the battle but she decided to hide the world and people she loved, breaking most of the magic-tech system. What I don’t understand is - the First Ones lived on Aetheria, but the people that populate it now are a different quality of organics, they can only survive in a specific atmosphere. The princesses are living components in the balancing of the tech-magic system...what are the people of the world? We don’t realise this most of the time, but all of them except for princesses, are animal-humanoids (and...kyle.....). What does this mean? Did the animal life unintentionally evolve? Were they an underclass - simply part of the system? (seems too edgy for this show).

‘why was i taken from my family? why was i forced to become a soldier?’ this line was GOOD

yesss!!! Mara! i love her already.

Scorpia is blushing lol. I am also liking Catra being completely off her shits careless and powerful.

Catra and Scorpia bonding yesssss!!!

ohhhhhHHH the magic of the planet is something of Aetheria itself! the tech is just latched on??? First Ones were colonisers (’settlers’)! but AETHERIA is what’s dangerous to the rest of the universe!!! (because it can be used as a weapon??) probably Aetheria would die as a result?

‘maybe it’s been a week, maybe it’s been thousands of years’ that is so fuckin sad

Catra being so hung up on acknowledgement is her greatest tragedy.

wow Scorpia really proposed a super cool thing and it could rearrange Catra’s WORLD

I want this show to stop repeating the same cycle after this last one time of Catra going: WAAAAHHH Adora made my life so hard now im going to do something inadvisable that might destroy us all as payback

Adora’s greatest tragedy is that she’s so self-centred that she doesn’t understand Catra at all.

if they have Angella and Glimmer fight and then have her mum die before they’ve made up i’ll be very upset (i’m not really loving Glimmer and Bow in this so far - they’re toeing the edge of annoying). and the fights about having to have plans and fighting or not fighting due to the fear of losing people - that’s always been uhhhh - well they always got away safe with shit plans and i just really don’t think that they’re meshing the commander-queen and daughter-mother stuff well. because there’s literally NO ONE ELSE in charge. there’s some magical queen and some villagers and a barely present guard. where’s the court, the advisors, anybody??

it would be silly to trust Shadoweaver (she did mercilessly torture you - no psychological effects from that stupidly enough), but i am hard-pressed to think of a reason she’d betray them.

still don’t understand how Frosta went from icy, frosty queen to idk a kid. i mean she can be both, but it was weird to see no uhhhh connection at all

I think this show is about how every single character is held back by their inability to grow and grow closer to others. Glimmer has disobeyed Angella SO often, why is she surprised at all? Why can’t she be honest and say: I am afraid! I am afraid I will lose you! I am afraid of that pain and I want you to take the risks seriously, to plan for them. I want to protect you!

That Glimmer would work with her torturer is of course a ridiculous notion. that is to say - if that kind of thing was properly given weight.

why fight Catra??? Why not just teleport to Hordak’s inner sanctum?? it’s stupid. why waste all the damn power

glad entrapta finally heard from Adora that she didn’t mean to leave her behind though.

‘you can’t fight them they’re too strong!’ ?? Glimmer just got sucked dry tho? like what. the way this show always postpones its fights on shitty pretexts is ....acceptable but pretty roll-eye-y

Catra burning all her bridges.

“there’s no choice” fucking bullshit, just teleport lol.

lol Catra feeds the anti-princess propaganda right back to Hordak. that’s poetic but jfc i really hope next season is going to be a little less *shuffles deck, cards end up in a million different hands, literally all cards feel betrayed*

so catra is willing to pull the annihilation switch on the universe just to one-up Adora just this once LOLLLL. if only somebody hadn’t ingrained a deeply seated inferiority complex in this cat

anyway i want her to feel the consequences of all that for a change

that animation on everything going VWWWWWWOOOOOOMM darkness was awesome

OHHHH the next episode has an awesome premise.

can i just say that i LOVE this episode. it’s so damn creepy and cool and kind of nostalgic. and i LOVE that it’s Scorpia and Adora who are remembering things - the ones closest to Catra. AND THEN THEY BOND!!!! and hold hands!!!!

reliving the betrayals. love the way the memories hit people, the way Catra goes from her old self, their playfulness, their casual violence ratcheting up at each other because that’s how they’ve been trained - to defend themselves, and then - the true Catra, the hysteria, gone so far off the deep-end. “i’d rather let the whole world be destroyed than let you win.” geeze that’s rooted deep.

angella and mica are so cuteeee. but angella really hasn’t changed has she? no tolerance for difficulty. she honestly is a bit of a shit queen. thought that was bc of grief and trauma but eh

he puts a truth spell on her but then he doesn’t believe her? does he think she’s crazy?

don’t think i’ve ever shipped something as hard in this show as Mica/Angella. i just LOVE royal woman x good man apparently. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. god why didn’t she kiss him on the lips>????

oh SHIT, MARA IS STILL TRAPPED INSIDE THE PORTAL LIKE ENTRAPTA SAID - THAT’S WHY SHE SAID: HAS IT BEEN A DAY OR THOUSANDS OF YEARS?

so...is there a reason that Angella is not faded?

wow that speech about bravery and cowardice. she truly. TRULY, ok they made something of her. I HATE losing Angella because the voice acting is INCREDIBLE. but that was actually an amazing end. (and she got to see Mica for the last time, at least)

ok so if i lost my mum forever i would be SCREAMING in pain but i guess these itsy bitsy tears from Glimmer will do?

that look of pure determination and anger and mercilessness in Adora’s eyes at Catra? nice. wish Catra didn’t go into a sulk at it but kept her goddamn FEAR (Adora was totally right, she vanquished another demon from her past - everything Catra did, she CHOSE to do. and her keeping on blaming others is simply - cowardice)

#anyway #that was a very good season #but i am not sure about this glimmer and angella thing #it still feels totally fuckin #weird #even more so now #kdslabf #sdjabj #sdjakfj #my stuff #she ra #vidi

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silenthillrn · 5 years

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had to fucking open up my brightass laptop bc tumblr mobile is absolute SHIT and doesnt allow readmores

ive been having anxiety attacks about this recently, and i guess its good to vent here. i have so much trouble being honest with my therapist, i have distrust of the healthcare system after the way it’s treated me as a mental health patient, and by knowing how it works because i am a healthcare worker

i was talking with a friend today about my self esteem issues, how im completely average in appearance but im annoying and tend to push people away, and it ended up going into how my biggest fear, and a recurring theme in my life, is abandonment

My father left us for a woman in her 20s when he was in his 40s. its given me a huge distrust of men and i firmly believe any man would leave their older wife for someone younger, statistics and men ive known have shown and stated that. it’s one of the reasons im happy to be bi i guess, i feel like women care less about aging with their partner

men always say women are gross and creepy when theyre old, they hate older women. it’s why i always joke about being a hag in a swamp with snakes and cats and crows and bugs, so i can isolate myself. it may seem like a joke, but that’s one scenario i await. Men, young and old, shit on older women as gross and unattractive, despite the fact that they’ll age themselves. any male partner i get i prepare for them to leave me for someone younger or because im too old. im annoying, im autistic, im mentally ill. My brother, and plenty of other guys, talk about how every girl nowadays is mentally ill. other people joke about how “everyone has anxiety” But when me, someone who is diagnosed with an actual disorder, has anxiety attacks, I’m seen as crazy and people don’t like that. I absolutely cannot control my anxiety, medication has done jack shit for me and I try my best with therapy, hobbies, and walking, but it’s something I’m always going to have. My attacks today have lead to hyperventilation, crying, and even vomiting

An ex boyfriend of mine, among me not taking his religious zealot shit and putting my foot down, left me for another girl. My dad left us for a woman half his age, who only wanted him for his money. He treated her daughters like his own, but always complained about how my brother and I were financial burdens because the judge ordered him to pay child support. I’ve had friends who lost interest in me and stopped talking to me. I plan on everyone leaving, save for maybe Arthur and Matt (who, fortunately, dont shit on women for aging, and thank you two, for being golden boys)

Both my mom and therapist have told me I have a nearly-impenetrable wall up, and they’ve both said I have it up because im afraid of people hurting me, so I push people away and don’t let them in. It takes people months, or even years to completely break through it. I laughed at them at first but i realize now that is an actual thing.

I have so much trouble trusting people, even when they say they’re being honest and transparent. People get upset with me when I talk about isolating myself, and how my future goals, such as my career and living on my own, only ever speak about myself, because I’m preparing for if I ever am actually truly alone.

One of the reasons I love animals so much is because, no matter what my hobbies are, what I look like, how annoying I may be, they only care about how I treat them. I love animals for that. Dogs are easily accepting, and cats I respect because it takes work to earn their trust. I am wary of people who don’t like cats for that reason because I myself need time based on past experiences, and also autism making interactions difficult. People so easily shit on those of us who are autistic because we function differently, we need time, we need space, I take time to open up to people fully. Sure, if I have something in common with you I’ll shoot the shit, but that doesn’t mean I’ve fully opened up. I have trouble looking people I’ve known for a long time in the eye for fuck’s sake

I don’t know how to wrap this up, maybe I can draw now that my laptop is open and isn’t super bright, i guess because i have my lamp on for once it doesnt seem as intense

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niconicon33ks · 6 years

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guh im glad ppl are giving aoyama the attention he deserves now. i mean i didnt get him until like. that one scene in s3 where he shot off a blast to save shouto. him being afraid and the thoughts we got from him already told us so much. he wanted to do more. he wants to be a hero and help. hes so afraid tho. AND THATS OKAY!!! and he did do his job!! he got his classmates to a safer spot!!! (i mean what happened still happened but he saved shouto’s ass)

then in the provisional license arc we get so much more told abt his character and that makes me soso happy and that people are recognizing his potential as a great character and hero and not some random asswipe looking for attention. he is looking for attention! but that’s bc he feels too different from others. and that makes me sad bc like? bro hes living in a world full of weird people with weird appearances and weird routines AND HE FEELS DIFFERENT.

what also makes me happy is that he stays himself anyway! he doesnt go out of his way to be different for others. different from who he actually is. he stays true to his personality. sure people may find it weird but so what?

and just!! god!! he wants friends so bad. he wants to be acknowledged. and seen for the potential he knows he has. but based on his outer self no one sees that. his outer self isnt bad. like i said hes just being himself and thats super good. and he deserves friends so bad!!! hes super caring and loyal to the people around him and will do what it takes to help them. such as at the end of the first task thingy in the provisional license exam.

guh another thing i think abt a lot is the way iida treated him during the exam. why arent they friends? i dont know. why hasnt this been acknowledged before? I DONT KNOW!! but if its animated its bound to get more attention than when it was in the manga bc most ppl JUST watch the anime. but god it just makes me sososososoo happy the way iida treated aoyama. he helped him!! and not just bc he was the class president but also bc he was his classmate and a hero. and when iida told him he wont stop sparkling?? i. cried. bless him so much. i need more iiyama content tbh theyre so wholesome.

MANGA SPOILERS starting nOW

what makes me even more happy, and what makes me laugh is that he went out of his way to make a friend. with izuku. he did it in his own special way and i loved that honestly. by treating him with different kindnesses and showing off. he did come off as a little creepy but im glad that izuku recognized that he was just trying to make a friend and noticed that?? he doesnt exactly have any. izuku wasnt disgusted he was just like oh!! aoyama’s pretty cool. or smth. and they got closer!! and even his classmates know that theyre pretty close and goD THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPy

AND WHEN IZUKU WAS GONE FOR AWHILE AOYAMA WAS CONCERNED!!!!!! ICRIED!!!!!!!

god thats the end of my aoyama rant. i love him so much even if i dont show it. i think abt him a lot. as u can tell.

#i love aoyama yuga #aoyama yuga #yuga aoyama #god he deserves the world guys omg #i had to rant abt him #thank for listening #iiyama

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ourlittlebitofnothinguniverse · 5 years

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You should also do all the weird asks that you want to. :p love you 💕

thank you!!! 1. have you ever been camping?a couple of times in my friend’s backyard with her! her horse came to visit us one time and it was rly fun

2. what’s your favorite game to play at sleepovers?idk i haven’t been to many maybe only two??? but we played truth or dare which was fun

3. do you prefer truth or dare or would you rather?truth or dare bc the ppl i’ve played it with haven’t been super mean except one time my friend’s little brother dared me to eat dogfood and then she dared me to do the cinnamon challenge and i almost passed out bc it was so dry i inhaled it it was awful lmao still had fun

4. have you ever been scuba diving?nope what kinda bougie question lmao like who just g e t s to go scuba diving hgdklsaf;

5. what’s the last text you sent?uh to my friend about how to songs sound very similar

6. who’s the last person you called on the phone?the dhs and it was awful

7. what weird, irrational fears did you have as a kid?my sister instilled the fear in me that if i didn’t flush immediately a ghost would come out of the toilet and haunt me and that terrified me and to this day i still don’t like bathrooms esp at night ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (although not bc i’m afraid the toilet ghost is gonna get me anymore ghlkadsf they’re still creepy)

8. do you have any tattoos or piercings?my ears WERE pierced when i was little BUT i’m allergic to metal so!! can’t wear earrings or jewelry that’s not plastic 8)))) and i don’t want tattoos bc i’m afraid of commitment so nope (i can’t even decide where to put a sticker how do you expect me to choose a design that will be on my body forever)

9. do you sleep with your doors open or closed? what about your windows?closed bc i’m not allowed to keep my door open even a crack 8))))))))and also closed windows bc i’m afraid archie will tear up the screen and escape

10. what are you most afraid of?not to steal your response but,,,,, same rat: the fear that death is empty/that i will just be gone

11. what posters, pictures, etc do you have hanging on your wall?none bc im not allowed to hang pictures either hhhaaaahahah

12. post the 35th picture in your camera roll.i’m on my laptop bc i’ve never had mobile and i’m not about to hook up my phone just for this so it is one of my (many) favorite progeny predictions from flight rising

13. do you have any phobias?probably but i can’t remember

14. what’s the first movie you remember seeing in theaters?uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i don’t remember lmao i know i went to the theaters a lot as a kid with my daycare class but i don’t remember any of them. the first one i can recall is robots but it wasn’t like a real theater it was the theater of a small resort that i had gone to with my dad and his family and the whole trip sucked

15. what time of day were you born?don’t remember the hour but i’m p sure it was night time (i wanna say eight smth)

16. if you could look like any celebrity, who would you choose and why?jason momoa or rami malek bc have you seen them they’re wonderful ppl with beautiful faces

17. what’s your favorite vegetable?hhhh uhhhh probably corn or green beans

18. could you go a year without talking?physically yes i barely talk anyways but if that includes texting friends then no because i get lonely if i can’t talk to at least one of my friends for more than an hour lmao

19. what’s your least favorite month?used to be april because we always seemed to have to move in april but now its july bc thats when mom died

20. what’s your favorite day of the week?friday not bc i have a job or anything bc i never had fridays off when i had a job but just bc??? idk it seems standard

21. who was the first friend you remember making as a kid?an empty one of those big heart shaped chocolate boxes. kept it for years. oh real friends you mean? this girl named alleah in my kindergarten class

22. what’s your favorite youtube video?????????? idk lmao is that a thing ppl have?

23. how many pets do you have?four but i’m trying to get rid of two of them because they were a gift but i can’t take care of them so they deserve better

24. what’s the weirdest injury you’ve ever gotten?i have a scar on my thumb from washing dishes and a cup broke while i was washing the inside. uhhhhh i have a very faint scar on my forehead that happened when i was a baby and my sister accidentally dumped me into a blackberry patch idk i don’t get injured a lot bc i don’t do things

25. what’s your favorite story to tell people?i don’t have any

26. what’s a common theme in your nightmares?fresh water turtles as pets also trying to protect people (my friends) and failing over and over

27. what item of clothing could you not live without????? i have a pair of the most awful shorts that are probably from a halloween costume that i got at a thrift store and also a cape (also from halloween) so i would be sad to miss those

28. what’s your morning routine?being woken up to take care of my nephew until my sister takes him to work with her

29. do you smile at strangers?i try.

30. what’s the worst restaurant you’ve ever been to?do fast food places count bc the night mom died we had dairy queen and spent a ridiculous amount of money for really gross food and like the smallest burgers and also like i only got five fries so dairy queen is on my shit list. i don’t get to go to actual restaurants often though but the ones i have have all been good imo.this was very fun thank you !! love you too hope your day has been good !

#friend tag #sorry it took so long i was busy this morning and then i was eating hgdhaskf;#also sorry i mentioned my mom dying so many times rip ghdsflakjsd

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toastoat · 7 years

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ok im putting under readmore bc its long

so last year i went to my older friends wedding w my sister and her boyfriend, and we stayed in another friends cabin at this lake i go up to every summer (im here now). we were all sleeping at the other friend’s place so i had to take the couch, my sister and her bf were upstairs. one morning the bf woke me up early bc i usually sleep in and said “i saw you sneaking around last night you gremlin” (he often calls me goblin/gremlin jokingly ) but since i had been fast asleep since midnight i was just ?????? and asked him wtf he was talking abt, to which he responded “im not gonna play your little game” (also jokingly) as if i was trying to play dumb or something.

later in the day after he kept referencing it and asking me to “see the pictures” me and my sister finally got it out of him that he had apparently woken up to “elsa in their nightgown standing in the doorway taking pictures of us (him and my sister) sleeping on a big camera”. i instantly was freaked out by this as was my sister bc we both know that a. i dont have a nightgown or even a dress that i brought w me, and b. i dont own any camera besides my iphone.

he was super convinced though that we were both playing some prank on him which made me and my sister even MORE scared bc she knew i was telling the truth. we tried to convince him he was dreaming/sleep paralyzed but he kept insisting he woke up and that it was me bc of the poofy blond hair i had at the time.

anyways we were super afraid of that and for the rest of the time there i made them let me sleep in their bed lol. later on when the summer had actually started, i invited hiro up to stay in my cabin w me- my parents were back in tokyo for a lot of the time we were there. i had lifeguarding every morning p much so hiro would often sleep in my room upstairs while i slept on the couch downstairs. one night we were coming home late after hanging out w friends and hiro asked if i could sleep upstairs w him that night bc “last night i had a nightmare or sleep paralysis where you just stood in the doorway of the room looking at me”

when he told me that (i hadn’t mentioned the previous thing to hiro at ALL bc i p much forgot abt it as a one-time thing) i flipped my SHIT and almost ran home holding onto his arm (but didnt mention the previous thing to him since it would just freak us out more) and went to sleep in the bed w him and peter (hiro’s dog).

ANYWAY after that i was suuuuper on edge abt sleeping on my own and i think at this point did tell my sister and hiro abt it. at the end of that week i was over at a friends place lying on his trampoline w hiro and a friend, and the guy who was hosting us came out and yelled for hiro and the other friend to come back in. i sat up and was kinda like “hey im here too fuck you” and when i called out the guy said “Elsa???” really weirdly and i just fuckin knew. some stupid creepy doppleganger shit was up. so i went in to be like “???” back to him and he looked closely at my face and called into the house (where everybody else was chilling) “elsa was out here the whole time “ and when i walked in everybody in the room was like “huh ???” and starting fucking looking out onto the deck where a hammock was set up.

they all informed me this whole time they thought i was sitting in the hammock outside swinging, and had called out to me several times which is why they were so surprised to see me outside.

hiro was already freaking out so at this point i just told them all both stories, and we all slept at the friend’s place bc we were all sooooo beyond freaked out. the rest of the summer we called the thing ppl kept seeing “Evil Elsa” and would make jokes like if we heard a scary noise at night “oh its just Evil Elsa” or if somebody farted “no that was Evil Elsa !!!” and didn’t have any more incidents

its really not that much of a scary story but its been creeping me out now that i’m back up here and staying alone in my cabin, and idk what it was in the first place bc nothing bad happened it just scared everybody.

#long post #creepy

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disarmingly · 7 years

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Do you like Halloween? Will you dress up as something or cook or bake or carve a pumpkin or eat halloween treats and sweets? What kind of stuff gives you the creeps? Anything you're afraid of? Something that bothers others but you're totally not afraid of (e.g. spiders?) If you could bring a fantasy creature to live creepy or not which kind of creature would it be (e.g. vampire, mermaid, phoenix)

uoeiwjfklds i love halloween it’s ah well okay so i get scared really easily and in fact fall which used to be my favorite season has some difficult things associated with it now. but halloween is just so !!!! i love everything about it even though i am constantly hiding my face in my hands from scary posters and running away from costume shops haha ^^;; im like the worst candidate for loving this holiday but i do...i wanna be a ghost haha /soft sad face/ but er too close so maybe um idk i wanna cosplay deku from bnha soon so i could thatd be cool. but otherwise maybe i can whip up a lowkey kiki cosplay ^^;; i dont do scary well so itll be cute...anime...stuff most likely. or like just me with cat ears in which case i might as well dress as kenma for the day but lololoolol....

oh oh i love to bake too but i don’t have uh money lately hardly at all for...anything...like...even regular...food... s-so i don’t think i’ll get to bake this year. ordinarily i’d like to make cute little pumpkin cheesecakes! my friend once made a totoro stencil and then made a totoro image on one of them with cinnamon and it was just the cutest tastiest thing ;3; ah ah....i love all things pumpkin except the seeds which i hate x( sdklfjiefklds bc im five years old and am kinda picky OTL uh uh i love sweets in general like im gonna die from eating nothing but sugar im p sure /squints at my suga intake and then hits myself for bad puns.../ ahm ....i am afraid of almost everything. i put out a kinda mean aggressive front bc i live in a city and when i used to be myself more i got picked on a lot. now i think people dont wanna mess with me bc i look super unpleasant ......which is what it is i guess. T_T;;; i dont wanna seem unfriendly but lololol...anyways um im afraid of most people, bright light, loud sounds, scary oriented anything like movies costumes stories music uhhhhhhhh yeah but for real i love halloween so who aM i T_T;;; lmfdsijofklsd.... bugs give me the creeps. also anything with a squishy texture like jiggly....i don’t count marshmallows because those are delicious. um. i’m afraid of people touching me lol and i’m afraid of closed-in spaces and i’m also just generally paralyzed in public situations like uh trying to go to um like the post office or the bank.

basically i’m an idiot with the backbone of....something without a backbone.

but i still love halloween. i love the sad ghost stories (shocker i know) because there is something hopeful about them to me i don’t know. i feel kind of understood whenever i read ghost stories growing up even when they end so sadly. i feel kind of like i was that person or maybe i will be which might not be good but also is less lonely to be recognized by preexisting art isn’t it? /rambles....

oh oh i would love...to bring a species to life if it wouldn’t harm them. i could not let myself have that luxury to bring only one though if i’m being literal. i wouldn’t want them to be alone. but if i was just saying oh yes this suddenly magically is another species that exists? it’s hard because i want badly to say mermaids but considering the status of our seas it’s not...the kindest thing to wish for is it? maybe vampires? ask them to suck the blood of all the rotten people in the world dry? vampire vigilantes? though my condolences to them too for having to touch those horrible people....ahem..../daydreams/

i am so sorry that got really long im like just high on not sleeping for 2.5 days pls forgive me...

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reds-revenge · 7 years

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im feeling evil so ALL THE LOCATION ASKS

>:( probably Josie anon, do you know how many times I gotta switch pages now? I’m kidding you’re cool mobile just sucks.

*deep breath* here we go

Amsterdam: yeah, I think so. I’ve always been the weird one, usually in a nice way but I’m still the weird one. I kinda sound like a robot when I’m tired, or trying to accomplish something, and I guess that’s not how all people think?? Anyway.

Athens: ahaha I’m not a perfectionist, I’m the PLATONIC IDEAL OF A PERFECTIONIST. Listen okay I will sink as much time as I need to get it perfect, that’s happening less with the depression bc I just can’t get it up to my standard, I’m trying to make this a Growing Opportunity and learn to set Attainable Goals, but it usually ends with me panicking instead. Ah well

Belgrade: my mother had a loooong list of names and my dad tried to mock them all, they only kept ones that you couldn’t really make weird nicknames for, one of my friends took that as a challenge and called me Kira the Mirra (like mirror) for a year, it was interesting

mom called my kiramodo dragon bc of some noise I made when I was a baby. I thought my name was baby for a while bc they called me Baby Kira my Deara. Then I decided I wasn’t a baby and dubbed myself Kira my Deara the Kid.

Berlin: well for that I’d have to KNOW what I what. I can usually do whatever, but I would really like is absolute certainty about things like do I exist, am I hurting people by existing, etc. and that’s just not something we get in this life. It’s :) so :) fun :) :) :)

Bratislava: it doesn’t have a firm genre, there’s a lot of oddly philosophical themes for something that’s mostly sci fi/ comedy, but there’s also bildungsroman elements bc life amiright, and what’s science besides a mystery?

The protagonist is Done™ with everyone including herself, there’s cephalopods.

Brussels: I’m not fluent in all the languages I borrow from but yeah I do this a lot, I’m a language nerd. I did it more often when I was younger and still liked learning Latin.

Bucharest: NOT ON PURPOSE OKAY, WE’D KNOWN EACH OTHER SINCE WE WERE FIVE SO ALMOST TEN YEARS AT THE TIME, I THOUGHT OF HIM AS MY BROTHER, WHY THE FUCK IS HE WRITING EMO STORIES ABOUT KISSING ME WE WERE S I B L I N G S.

I don’t think of him as family anymore but not bc of the ~*drama*~, I learned some Things and grew Wise. (Well, wisER)

Budapest: maybe, I was five, my love was unrequited. We ended up being friends bc in such a small class whatcha gonna do? We didn’t talk about that fiasco for ten years, turns out that whole declaring my love to the class thing was pretty awkward for him. Whoops.

Copenhagen: outside of old, distant relatives, no. I haven’t actually kissed someone romantically before at all, and I don’t have a desire to. I’m not saying I wouldn’t ever someday, I just haven’t sought that kinda thing out.

Dublin: between being a minor and being an obsessive rule follower, that hasn’t happened. I doubt I ever will, losing even the slightest bit of control over myself terrifies me

Helsinki: now this is interesting. I’m guessing this is referring to romantic love, but it doesn’t SAY that.

Look, I wanna be a scientist. Like really really wanna be a scientist, always have, always will. This sounds cliche but I feel like I was made for the sciences, I really do.

but I gotta go with love. Not romantic necessarily, just in general. And this isn’t a “well I’d better choose the Virtuous thing.” Like, I feel made for science, but science doesn’t mean anything if you’re not using it for something. Neither does art for that matter. Idk, but without love–for my family, my friends, for squids, for God–i just don’t see the point of this whole life thing. So yeah, I’m going with love

Kiev: YES AND FRANKLY I’D CHOOSE THE KNIFE EVERY TIME. I’m not gonna tell you EVERYTHING EVER THAT WAS SAID TO ME bc that would take way too long but yes, yes I have even when they weren’t trying to be knife words

Lisbon: I’m honestly not sure, like I like Hamilton’s America but I hate Trump’s, also I’m really drawn to the British isles and honestly France and Polynesia and India and Russia are all cool, so like I don’t feel like I belong but I might not belong anywhere if that makes sense? Idk tbh

Ljubljana: not really, I sound like my mother over the phone and if you look at baby pictures without the hair showing Greta and I get mixed up (not by family by friends) I have kind of distinctive hair, so.

London: Google says this is thinking vs feeling basically so I gotta go sense (thinking)

Luxembourg: I REGRET EVERYTHING and I often regret things deeply, like really stupid things bc of ~*damaging theology*~ but now mostly because ~*Ocd*~ (I think idk I guess maybe knocking that board over really will send me to hell, I’ve been spinning over this for YEARS)

Madrid: ALL THE TALENTS but maybe speaking fluent French, juggling, and playing guitar if you want some specifics

Moscow: No. I mean when else would I do all the thinking? Not during the day when I’m half asleep, surely.

Nicosia: whenever I’m nervous or exhausted which is most of the time now tbh

Oslo: HAhahahahaha this is hilarious. I’d like absolute 100% certainty that everything is 100% okay, always has been, and always will be. I don’t know what okay even is here but I know that 100% certainty does not exist and also everything probably isn’t okay, and EVEN IF I KNEW THIS I would still be nervous for some hellish reason, I don’t think I’ll ever actually have peace of mind :/

Paris: I mean yeah, but not more afraid than I am of most things. I guess I’m more scared I’d mess it up somehow

Podgorica: HELL YEAH. I mean, I’m curious about death and franklyitwouldntbeterribleifigothitbyasnipertomorrow @ the government, but setting that aside I’ve been raised on stories of people dying, dying for good or evil but for what they believe and I was kinda scared when I was little that I’d chicken out and surrender to the fascist government or whatever but I won’t, I’ll just do the thing, follow the rule same as any other. And even if my beliefs are wrong we’re all gonna die anyway, so

Prague: not really, no. I’ve got a good family, a good church for once, I’m heading to running start next year to study what I want, I don’t really have something to be jealous of.

I mean I’d like my brain to work but I’m not *jealous* of people who’s brains do the thing, I’m happy for them I just would like to be like that too

Reykjavik: A TINY FLOATING ISLAND COUNTRY I COULD PARK WHERE I WANTED I MEAN I DOUBT I’M GONNA MOVE PERMANENTLY OUT OF AMERICA BECAUSE THAT SOUNDS HARD AND MY FAMILY’S HERE BUT I DON’T LIKE ABSOLUTE RULES WHERE I DON’T NEED THEM

Riga: I would take as many selfies as I had to to get one I only kinda hate, I would post that one. (Yeah this is specific but I’m waiting for the technicality police over here, I totally would tho I don’t really care)

Rome: yeah but not romantically. I mean this is gonna sound weird I’m sorry but once in a blue moon I get an overwhelming sense of God and His love for me, that sounds cheesy or fake or something but I’m too tired to not be painfully honest rn

Sarajevo: TO INFINITY AND BEYOND. I wouldn’t do whatever they asked me to, I’m not gonna sign my mind over bc they’re human too and not always right and maybe the stakes are high etc, but if they need something I'ma do the thing at any cost of time, resources, sanity, etc. to myself I’ve got no boundaries here

Skopje: I honestly don’t know?? I’ve been called a lot of sweet things by a lot of sweet people and I remember EVERY SINGLE ONE and honestly I don’t think I could choose one, they’re all sweet in different ways, you know?

Sofia: not in a physical way, women are shockingly treated differently from men in Puritainville, but most people were fine with me in general if I didn’t touch certain buttons. Everyone had different buttons but never said what they were until whoops! It was fun :)

Mental health is also a super fun topic in Puritainville if you were wondering, someone told my mom when I first pulled out of school that I didn’t need a doctor, I just needed a book on Grace, because clearly my theology was why I couldn’t talk and slept fifteen hours a day

Also being Anglican was interesting, I tried explaining the whole icon thing and Lent and via media but it fell on deaf ears

I dunno if this is prejudice related or not but some guy called me a Pharisee when I was seven bc I told him off for making it impossible for me to follow the rules, he was trying to make us scared to teach us about God’s grace, you can imagine how well tiny Kira handled that

wow okay well I guess that’s a yes then

Stockholm: UNFORTUNATELY

In middle school everyone wrote stories about their thinly disguised classmates, and then in ninth grade creepy mcbadideas wrote stories about me saving him from his life basically and then him saving me from depression with a kiss, it was weird

and then Mom has used the whole family for story ideas

Tallinn: I can’t recall a rumour I’ve heard about myself, I’m very open. There were certainly rumors about me being ~*liberal*~ but that was actually true so idk.

I’d like to hear some though, I’m so out there already it’s gotta be entertaining

Tirana: no??? I’m honestly not sure what sexy is but everyone else seems to? Mom swears boys look at me–she’s usually telling me how not to die at a bus stop when this comes up– but I don’t notice anything

Valletta: thankfully no, at least not a big one. The worst I’ve injured myself was when I kinda timed a jump over a brick wall wrong and took out a chunk of my shin.

Vienna: I gave this one A LOT OF THOUGHT but I don’t think there’s like one song that totally captures my life, I definitely identify with songs but there’s not one single song in part because I’m still trying to process my life, you know? Fit things into the correct slots. Until I do that–if that’s even possible–i won’t have just one song. Sorry!!

Vilnius: yeah, why not? If it’s not like a permanent thing bc I have issues with permanency then it’d be cool, if only to get another point of reference for how things are done

Warsaw: i AM a depression lol. I thought two years was about as long as major depressive episodes lasted but I guess not, or maybe I was misdiagnosed idk

Zagreb: I’ve certainly given my TRUST to people I shouldn’t have, I’ve given my FRIENDSHIP to people I shouldn’t have, but I don’t think I’ve ever given someone my heart when I shouldn’t have.

Zurich: not at all. It’s a means to an end, you need it for college and food and stuff, but outside of that I really don’t care. I’ve been trying to figure out how we could restructure society without money and keep it fair and not suppress individuality and keep everyone taken care of it’s an interesting thought experimentTHERE I’M DONE I hope you appreciate that that took me a couple HOURS JOSIE I love you but WOW am I glad that’s over

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clefeah · 7 years

Text

colu - ego

i havent written in like a year bc of personal reasons, so im probably out of practice, pls give feeback if u have the time! this is a colu oneshot bc i love rarepairs. enjoy!

Today had not gone as Lucy expected, well no, that’s not entirely true. She expected her team to eventually disregard the plan she so expertly devised and run in, guns blazing like they always do. She just sort of hoped they wouldn’t. Which, now, as she sits alone, outnumbered by some edgy dark mage douchebags dressed in all black, she realizes was kind of unrealistic.

“It’s cool, Lucy, you got this!” She mumbles unconvincingly to herself.

From the corner of her eye, she can see the golden glinting of her keys, safely stowed in the black pocket of a mages robe. After a mini pep talk she convinces herself to go for them. She takes a breath and prepares to tackle the large, robed figure. She lunges forward, but they dodge her, causing her to go flying headfirst into the wall. She rubs her head and glares as she hears one of the mages laugh at her.

“It’s alright, Lucy, Team Natsu has tackled enemies bigger than this and won no problem, you’ll be fine!” She continues to tell herself, with the same unsure tone.

She hears the same laugh again, and turns in that direction, so she can tell the jerk off for mocking her. Surprisingly, there doesn’t seem to be anyone there, which causes goosebumps to rise on Lucy’s skin.

“Wait, wait, wait! This guild has supposedly has taken a vow of silence, and even went as far to use a spell to disable their voices. That’s why they’re called ‘Dead Silent’.” Lucy recalls frantically to exactly nobody. “So if it wasn’t one of them, then-“

Her pondering is cut short by the sound of something landing on the metal ground behind her with a bang. She squeaks in surprise and spins around to see a tall figure in a navy cloak. She draws back instinctively and prepares for a fight she feels almost certain she’ll lose.

“Hey.” The mysterious person says in a voice that seems somehow familiar to Lucy.

“H-hey..?” Lucy replies in a daze, shocked by their nonchalant attitude.

“You sure like talking to yourself.” They mock.

“Who are you?!” Lucy demands, purposely ignoring the completely true statement.

A smirk plays on what she can see of the strangers lips, and they finally remove their hood. Lucy gasps at the identity of the taller person.

“Considering your current situation, I’d say I’m your knight in shining armor.” Cobra, or rather Erik, laughs teasingly.

“You! Y-you’re..?” Lucy gasps, unable to gather words in her surprise. “Amazing? Handsome? The best?” He suggests jokingly.

Lucy furrows her eyebrows, she knew she didn’t really like him, but she didn’t expect him be so obnoxious.

“Heard that.” The dragon slayer comments, snapping Lucy from her albeit rude thoughts.

“Ah, Sorry…” She apologizes awkwardly, then shakes her head. “Wait, no I’m not. Why am I apologizing to you?”

“Maybe because I’m your savior?” He says self importantly.

“Who said I needed saving?!” Lucy yells, her face turning red from either embarrassment or anger.

“Your thoughts did.” He grunts, looking annoyed at her sudden screaming. “Who said you were allowed to read my thoughts?!” She screams in the same loud voice.

Erik says nothing to this, just simply gives her a confused look. It’s not like he could really control it, he just has really good hearing. Well, that’s an understatement, but he certainly did not care to hear the celestial mage’s thoughts of self pity.

“Wait.” Lucy says, lowering her voice to almost a whisper.

Erik raises his eyebrows and signals her to continue.

“They’ve been sitting there the entire time while we spoke. They haven’t tried to attack us once.” She tells him, her voice showing her unsettlement.

Lucy was right and they both knew it, they’ve just been watching the odd pair banter with the same detached look on each of their faces. Now that Lucy thought about it, they weren’t even trying to attack her when she was alone, just dodging her when she attacked.

“Hey, you can read minds! Tell me what they’re planning to do with us!” Lucy commands Erik in a hushed tone, as if they were going to suddenly jump from their passive mode.

“Say please.” He says slyly.

“Hey, your ass is on the line here too, buddy!” She growls impatiently.

Erik’s face morphs from an arrogant smirk to an expression of unease and confusion.

“What, are you just now realizing that?”

He shakes his head slowly as his lips curl into a frown. Lucy crosses her arms and tilts her head inquisitively.

“Then what’s your problem?”

“I can’t hear their thoughts.” He hisses in frustration, voice barely audible.

Lucy blinks a couple times.

“Come again?”

“This isn’t the first time this has happened,” he recalls his first encounter with Jellal. “but for such a large group of people, it’s ridiculous. Not to mention, I can’t sense any magic energy from them!” He explains in a troubled tone.

“Paired with their suspicious behavior, that makes a double creepy.” Lucy whines, a chill running up her spine.

Erik glances down at the shaking blonde mage and exhales.

“Don’t lose your head. I’ll handle this.” He assures her, awkwardly placing a hand on her shoulder before lunging at the group in front of him.

Lucy hears a familiar bang, then sees Erik lying in the same position she was just a few minutes ago. She thinks she would laugh if she weren’t so unnerved.

“They dodged you too?”

Erik says nothing and immediately gets up, preparing to get serious. Lucy smirks subconsciously, he’s probably embarrassed.

“Let’s see you dodge this, asshole!” He snarls, changing his stance. “Poison Dragon Roar!!!”

His poison breath successfully engulfs his target, and he flashes a cocky grin when the cloaked figure is nowhere to be seen amongst the poison. Lucy shudders, is he really powerful enough to dissolve a guy, clothes and all?! Her question is answered by the forming of a shadow in front of the slayer. When it takes shape, it looks eerily similar to the guy Erik just attacked.

“I was afraid of this.” Lucy sighed and bit her lip.

“Afraid of what?!” Erik snaps, obviously frustrated that he failed again.

“These are shadow wraiths. They can’t hurt us, but we can’t hurt them either. They can be created by high level shadow mages.” She explains irritably.

“If they can’t hurt us, then what’s there to be afraid of? Can’t we just leave?”

Lucy’s turns red as her face falls. It really hadn’t occurred to her that she could have just left.

“I don’t see why not…” She answers awkwardly.

Erik is at the door before she can even finish, trying to open it.

“Locked.” He growls, looking about ready to explode.

“Ah,” Lucy’s face falls. “I think this might have been a distraction for them to lock us in here, like Illusion Magic.” She says hesitantly, not wanting to make him angrier.

Even though she doesn’t have super hearing like her angry counterpart, she swears that she could hear something snap inside of Erik.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” He roars at Lucy.

“Hey, you can’t just blame me! You have the big ears, why didn’t you hear anyone locking the door?!” She retaliates, not about to be scolded by him.

Erik opens his mouth to reply, but promptly shuts it when he realizes that he has no comeback.

“But you knew what these things were, why didn’t you just leave?!” He adds. “I didn’t, until you attacked it! These ones were really well made, and have the benefit of the whole ‘edgy matching outfits’ thing going on!”

“That’s an awful excuse, and even you think that! Now, because of you, I’m stuck here!” Erik complains loudly.

“I’m still failing to see how this is my fault!”

The pair continues to argue in front of their audience of soulless wraiths until Erik puts a finger to Lucy’s mouth and shushes her.

“Someone’s coming.” He tells her.

“Finger. Off. Now.” She says in a dangerously low voice.

He complies, then slowly moves towards the door.

“Who is it?” Lucy inquires quietly.

He shakes his head, indicating that he can’t quite tell. Suddenly, he bangs on the door, startling Lucy.

“Oi! In here!” He yells at the door, or rather to the people on the other side. The footsteps are then loud enough for Lucy, with her average hearing, to sense. Next, the doorknob starts to jiggle, and the door opens. Standing there is the rest of their respective teams.

“Why’re you banging on the door like that?” Sorano questions, hands on her hips. “We were trapped in here.” Erik replies.

“Really? By whom, exactly?” Jellal asks warily, looking around for enemies. Lucy and Erik turn to see that the wraiths have disappeared.

“Ah, well, there were some shadow wraiths here, but that doesn’t matter. The door was locked.” Lucy tells the confused group.

“Locked?” Sorano laughs. “Sure, it was a bit jammed, but nothing impossible to open.”

At that moment, the rooms falls silent.

“So, you were too busy yelling at me to actually put a little effort into opening the door, huh?” Lucy says lowly, aura turning dark.

Erik purses his lips and clasps his hands. Well, this is embarrassing, because she’s completely right.

“My bad..?” He says sheepishly.

Lucy ignores him, and just turns around to get her keys, which were dropped when the wraiths disappeared.

“Hey, I said it was my bad, okay? No need to use words like that!” He huffs, crossing his arms.

“I didn’t say anything!” Lucy glares.

“No, but you thought it!”

“God, you guys sound like you’re having a lover’s quarrel, it’s gross.” Sorano sneers, looking away.

“Shut up!” They both say in unison.

“Hey, you both agree that Sorano should shut up, that’s something!” Meredy giggles.

“Kid, I’m this close.” Sorano snaps, narrowing her eyes at Meredy, who is beaming as usual.

“Enough, let’s just get out of here.” Erik groans.

“Agreed.” Lucy says, almost mimicking his tone.

A sly grin crosses Meredy’s face as she stifles a giggle.

“So, why are you guys even here?” Lucy asks the whole of Crime Sorciere, as they start towards the exit.

“The same reason as you, pretty much. Dead Silence is a dark guild that’s been causing a lot of trouble, so we dealt with it.” Erik replies.

“You mean we dealt with it, while you two got to know each other in the supply room.” Sawyer adds.

They both glare, but don’t say anything, mostly because it’s true.

“I take it that this means the job is finished?” Lucy asks.

“Yup! We took down the master. He was tough, but obviously he couldn’t stand a change against all of us!” Meredy answers.

“That explains why the wraiths disappeared. The master must have been controlling them.”

“You guys got trapped by a bunch of shadow wraiths? Aren’t they virtually harmless?” Gray mumbles.

The pair look at each other awkwardly, today was not good for either of their ego’s.

#colu #ft #fairy tail fanfiction #colu fanfiction #10TH TIME TRYING TO POST THIS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #hopefully it works #mystuff

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hatchibomitar · 7 years

Note

trans ask: 1, 5, 6, 20, 32, 34

1. How did you choose your name?

so i read some advice that you should look on a bunch of baby name sites for inspiration aha..so i did! at first i was looking at all kinds of names, but i switched to just looking at K names after a while. 2 of my non-k top picks were Dustin and Finley which are both nice names but they dont fit me aha. i had been looking at Kato too and i think that was one of my top favs. so was Kalix. and this whole time i kept seeing like...cayden, kaden, caidden etc like 45 difffernt spellings of this name and i was like pff :/ that’s a lame name :/ who would want that name and then i saw Kaiden and i was like.........oh. so that’s where that name has been all my life. that’s perfect. that’s me

5. What was the first time you suspected you were transgender?

i think i always knew something was different about me from the other kids, but i could not figure out what it was. and by always i mean...always. from when i first started having memories of being a human until high school. i’d always felt the way. it was really stereotypical things too hahaha... when i was 5, i threw a fucking FIT when i went to a private school for 2 years bc there was a uniform and it involved a skirt. and i was like....there is no way in Hell you can get me to wear that. and i was a pretty good, i didn’t behave badly, so i imagine it was pretty sho0cking that i was So adamant about not wearing a skirt. i got to wear leggings :’) that same year i also remember wanting to cut my hair. i talked to my friend about it and i told her how badly i wanted short hair. she told me i should ask my m om. so i did! i was like “mom, can i cut my hair short like a boy?” and she said no. i was pretty devastated about that. again, in the same year, i had a cnoversation with my mom. i asked her why i wasn’t a boy. i told her that i wanted to be a boy. and she said “well, when you were in my stomach, you were a boy. until the very last second, when you changed yor mind. so that’s why you’re a girl.” i’ve brought this up with my mom recently and she did not remember it at all hahahah, whereas i held onto that for 12 years. it was probably supposed to make me feel better, but it just made me pissed off at my older self. we were so close to happiness, you fuckin fetus! jeez! asshole... hahahha. but like i knew all this when i was 5 yrs old. i sort of gave up on it for a long long long time after my mom shut me down so much. i really blame the lack of awareness and information about trans people at the time. there were just no public trans people so my mom didn’t even think twice. she thought i was just a tom boy - and treated me that until i told her i was trans

6. When did you realize you were transgender?

so flash forward to high school. i still had all the same thoughts. i kind of hated myself for being so obsessed with this. it was always at the back of my mind that i “wanted to be a boy” when i was young. i kept trying to push it away and say that it didn’t matter. i’d say i was especially confused when i started realizing i liked girls. once i accepted that, i sort of pushed the gender stuff away because i thought it was just a “”lesbian thing””. i literally have a diary entry talking about how it should’ve been “so obvious” that i was gay because of all the gender confusion when i was younger. this was very confusing for my brain hahaha. i basically just used that as an excuse because i did not want to go back to feeling different and creepy for being dissatisfied with my gender. but anyway, it was in high shcool! i had just met the first trans person that i ever knew and it kinda shocked me into realizing that people DID have those feelings too, and they actually could do something about it. during this era was when i was discovering tumblr and also when i was discovering trans guy youtube videos. i liked to say that i just watched them because they were Super Interesting, but in reality they made me feel something i’d never felt before. they let me know that what i’d always wanted was actually a possibility. and if none of these guys were as ashamed as i had been, was it possible i could do this and be happy? i believe i first came out as trans in 2014. i actually came out as nonbinary first lmao. and i wouldnt be surprised if a part of me actually is agender like i suspected, but anyway

20. What do you wish you could have shared with your younger self about being trans?

you’re not scary, you’re not weird, you are a human being and the things you are feeling are not Bad. you aren’t bad. you don’t deserve to be bullied about this. don’t ever forget that. one day you will be at peace with this information and your body will be how you always wanted it to be

32. How do you see yourself identifying and presenting in 5 years?

i hope that i continue stretching the boundaries of how i was always taught men are supposed to act. when i first started transitioning, i was so insecure in my masculinity that i would just conform to all the Bad stuff. lately i’ve been really try9ing to move away from that. like i’d be afraid to speak a certain way, sit a certain way, like certain things or have emotions. i never wanna be that way again. and in 5 years, as long as im doing that, i’ll be happy

34. What advice would you give to other trans people, or what message would you like to share with them?

accepting yourself is one of the hardest things on this earth to do, but once you do that, you will feel like you can be yourself. you will flourish and you will be so happy. look around, the world is full of trans role models now. you will be just fine

#trans shit #transition #anon #askies

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