#and now im a child again and i have work tomorrow and i cant scream and cry into my partner cause they have work | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

heartlvrrss · 6 months

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haechan x reader

Word count: 1127 (puku puku pow pow)

requested? Yes( •̀ ω •́ )y

Warnings: Small mentions of being gutted (not anyone in the story itself don't worry I'm not cruel) THIS IS ALSO NOT PROOF READ SO IF ITS SHIT IM SORRY T-T other than that nothing (I think)<3

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It was finally halloween, the time of year where you would usually call up your best friend lee donghyuck to do all those little halloween things before scaring and bullying kids.

You originally wanted to do a little party with your friends but apparently everyone all of a sudden had to do something, which, in your opinion was total bs. But at least you still had haechan, god did the man piss you off at times but he was a good friend, a cute one maybe even pretty.

“That actually looks like shit” Haechan had the audacity to say while you were carving your pumpkin that you were actually working very hard on, but your ego came back up after seeing his. “You have no right to talk, I cant tell if your trying to make a version of jack the skeleton that was dropkicked as a baby and fell down the stairs 1 million times or if your just making a pumpkin self portrait” You snapped back

“My mother told me to be an honest person, so I told you the truth, no need to insult me!” He replies with wide eyes. Before you could say anything more both of you heard a bell ring, a grin crept up both of your faces before running to the door with vegetables.

You both fought to open the door until u slapped him “get your fatass hand away from the handle I wanna see our victim first” you whispered loudly, the bell rang one last time before you opened the door.

You both saw a young girl in a unicorn costume

“Well hi! What are you this halloween?” You asked

“Isn’t it pretty obvious” the child said, which shocked me with the attitude. She really deserves a vegetable now.

“Is it a fairy??”

“I’m a mermaid you dumb bitch”

I turned to hyuck and mouthed “goddamn..”

“Oh.. Uh… Choose 3 candies from here” This girl scares me i literally might shit my pants on the spot.

You and hyuck watch as the girl skips away to her mother that was waiting by the end of the driveway, still in shock.

“You were supposed to give her the vegetable!”

“Well she’s got fucking anger issues i don’t wanna get cursed out by a child again!”

“Whatever”

I walked back to the kitchen with hyuck right behind me, while i try to extend my legs as much as possible (which TOTALLY not an attempt to trip him)

“What the fuck are you doing ___”

“Its a walking habit hyuck, have you not known me long enough to know that?” you ask with a fake betrayed look on your face

“__ Ive know you for far too long to know thats not a habit of yours. Its a poor attempt of trying to trip me. YOU are the traitor not me.” He grabs his chest and looks away in a fake dramatic manor

you roll your eyes “drama queen.. Well whatever lets watch a movie we can finish the pumpkins tomorrow.” and you gave him the bright smile that hes always loved.

When he saw that smile his heart leaped as usual, whenever he saw you he swears he might have a heart attack; just how could a human be so perfect, is what hed always ask himself whenever he saw you. You are the epitome of perfection to him, and thats exactly what hurt him, he wanted you so bad but he just didnt want to ruin your relationship with him incase you didnt like him back.

Hyuck decided to watch scream on whatever illegal website you could find on your tv, when the part where Casey becker was gutted you flinched a bit immediately holding on to hyuck for comfort, as he just cuddled you closer in response, wrapping you around with the blanket. You looked up at him admiring him for a bit, your heart skipping a bit while the movie plays in the background, you then lean in to kiss him lips barely brushing against each others, thats when you heard a ring your house phone was ringing. A bit freaked out thanks to the scream movie you were watching, you walked up to the phone with hyuck trailing behind you, a bit bummed out the moment was interrupted.

“Hello? Who is this” the fear in your voice evident

“You dont need to know who i am” the deep voice replied, you look at hyuck to see if he had anything to do with this, but he looked equally confused

“Do not fucking play with me right now, im watching scream right now and you using that voice is gonna make me shit my pants now fuck off and dont joke around” you hang up pissed “just some creep” you told hyuck “ok whatever, can we please contin-” his voiced was cut off by the phone ringing again.

You turn around and pick up the phone again

“Dont fucking hang up on me bitch”

“What the fuck can i not just enjoy my halloween for goodness sake” someone started loudly banging on the door

“Open the fucking door”

“No”

“Open the fucking door NOW”

I cover the phone dk the person couldnt hear me “hyuck please open the door”

“Yes ma’am” I walk next to him with the phone still by me, as hyucks hand slowly reaches for the door knob he opens it

You scream and jump into hyucks arms scared for what would happen, only to be met with a loud

“SURPRISE!!!” you open your eyes to see a bunch of your friends laughing at you including haechan

“That was not fucking funny!” you say close to tears, looking at giselle holding a phone “And you YOU i thought no one was coming!” you jumped out of hyucks arms close to tears (angry tears be so real)

“Woah woah we are so sorry ___! Youre right that wasnt funny” hyuck apologises hugging you

“Thats right you better be sorry” you say as you cried

“I think we should leave.. seems like somethings going on here and i dont wanna be a witness…” you hear ningning say as the group walk away

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“Are you mad at me?” hyuck asks worried

“You actually thought my tears were real? I didnt know i was that good of an actor” you reply, a bit shocked he believed your stunt

“You were lying??”

“Ofcourse i just wanted to get the away so i could kiss you in private” you say as you grab his face and give him a sweet pure kiss, finally able to continue the urge after you got rudely interrupted right when you were about to kiss him.

“So are we official now?” he asks

“ofcourse”

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@polarisjisung here hua! ik im very late but I'm finally finished T-T I hope you like it<3

#nct dream x reader #haechan x reader #nct dream #nct dream fluff #nct dream imagines #nct x reader #nct 127 #nct dream scenarios #nct 127 x reader #nct 127 x y/n #nct dream x y/n #nct dream x oc #nct dream x you #this is so late for Halloween but whatwver

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for82sy · 1 year

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i was in class today (i am a highschler and i work alot as well), and since everybody was talking too loud, i carried a pair of ear things for my sensory to carry with me because i was getting a bit stimulated meanwhile masking my neurodivergency (my adhd, autism, everything even my dyscalculia bc i cant do math), and i got irritated and i finished my juice box and put it in the bin while having them on.

NOW TELL ME, why is the WHOLE class staring at me?? and some girl shouted out, “GUYS SHES AUTISTIC?? LOOK AT HOW SHE WEARS THAT” and the “look what shes wearing. are you autistic?” literally the whole fucking class looked at me and called me retarded and the teachers did NOTHING TO HELP ME.

then the fact that she has neurodivergent issues of her own too and she fucking said that.

now how is this fair. theres ppl in my schl, same year, who had adhd + autism + sensories + stim toys + dyslexic ppl, etc and they’re praised (most of them are white and some are black) but me, as a child (whos mainly mix but shows black to others), im the one targeted???

but if i was the one to scream due to overwhelming feelings and had everyone laugh at me, I’d get into trouble.

never bringing my stim toys + earphones + etc AGAIN. idgaf ill suffer.

nice to know that everybody suddenly knows you’re “autistic” over some “headphones” 😹

now i have to mask my neurodivergency the whole day tomorrow.

#leaving my stim toys and everything at home cause i cant with this fucking thing anymore #im tired of being called retarded for my hyperfixations or my autism #im tired of being looked at weirdly for earphones to help protect me from having a whole ass meltdown #im tired of having to mask everything due to allistics or other ppl in the neurodivergent community embarassing me about it #i just wanna be normal.#i fr dont care anymore #im leaving everything at home. im not bringimg anything anymore.#if i end up stressed #y’all know why.#actually autistic #adhd #sensory #autism #ear defenders #stim tools #stimming #clear slime #neurodivergent struggles

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idgafabyou · 2 years

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today at work i was met with an heavily neurodivergent kid(im assuming this because no one told me anything about his diagnosis),he is coming to the daycare for only an hour every day(for an adaptations sake). I dont even know where to begin. First of all, I don't know what they tought by bringing him here without an assistant. I am no assistant for this. This child from the moment he came IMMEDIATELY started with self harm behavior. And Im talking like biting his fingers, banging his head on the wall, he wouldn't sit, he doesn't react to me, or anyone. He was crying hysterically (i expected this). No one told me, or my coworker about his diagnosis- I am not specialized in child care, I'm there to help out because there is a lot of kids for my coworker (she is the specialized one). Even SHE doesn't know what the fuck she's doing. She told me to leave him on the floor (i dont know what she wanted to accomplish with this, maybe she hoped he would calm down, while this is going on, there are other kids to tend to, so she was focused on that). I don't know about others, but for me personally this was unacceptable. Ofcourse I ran to the child. My first intention was to stop him from self harming. Turns out he doesn't even react to me at all. And he was pretty resilient so I tried to check if comforting him would help. He pushed me away multiple times and the only thing that could calm him down at times was when I was holding his hands. His crying didn't stop, but he was ATLEAST reaching for my finger to hold it and he for the first time held eye contact with me. This was an long ass fucking process, took me more than 30 minutes to get to this point. Im a patient mf. I could do this for hours if necessary. My coworker decided that it would be a great idea for him to go outside with other kids (its an indoor terrace). Ofcourse I knew this will absolutely kill every bit of progress I've made but I had to go with it (i literally have no say in this,i asked her if i could stay with him inside instead, she said no,because she cant leave me tending to one child-"we would get in trouble"). So now imagine we are outside, twenty small toddlers running around, screaming- he is now worse than in he was because its fucking overwhelming. He never actually stopped screaming. His mom came to pick him up. She looked very young. The higher ups are stupid. They don't see an issue here. We are left to our own devices, I will ofcourse, try again tomorrow. But this was very upsetting.

#mom doesn't want to get him an assistant because she 'want him to socialize'#i feel awful

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clinicalcat · 2 months

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Day 1:

Good day today. Woke up at 9:30am (proud) incase work called me in

Started off bad; suicidal and considered going back on my meds . I really wanna raw dog life, because surely taking antidepressants is just covering up the root problem— I've never been to therapy? [-2]

My lightbulb has been broken for a week, so Mum gave me hers. Never been so grateful to be able to see in my own room [+1]

Went on the sunbed, blasted BRATS songs whilst I was on it. Had a little party in my head, listening to cute girls scream about wanting to disappear was a good outlet. Havent listzned to them in a few months

I was opposed to the idea of the sunbed— uv lights directly on my skin for 10 minutes daily seems like im asking for cancer, but it really helps satisfy my lizard urge to sit on a warm rock. Short term solution til summer rolls around. [+1]

Came home, thought "well rocking out to music helped! Lets watch a concert" and did exactly that.

I bought blurays of my favorite seiyuus in concert last april, but havent had the motivation to actually open any of them until now— i was considering selling them the day before so im glad i didnt lol. Cracked open /Lynx Eyes LIVE TOUR Higher and Higher Day Performance/ and stimmed for an hour whilst watching beautiful ladies sing. [+2] i have 6 others left.⤵️

I hate new things. Its the autism, i know. Ive had games unopened for years before i play them, even if its my favorite series (pokemon, final fantasy, phoenix wright).i know ill like them. But theres a mental block on actually starting the task (i love them when i actually play them)

These seiyuu GENUINELY have been the light of my life in my darkest moments. I love them and the life they bring to their characters. I am forever grateful for every musical artist and the talents they possess.

Watched tv for... wait for it.. 6 fucking hours

I never watch tv (i spent my worst depressed years in the living room, so i try to avoid there unless im eating) but i sat down and watched some with mum. One series about the murders of gay men, another about child sex trafficking. Both true stories, i feel satisfied with the conclusion of them both, really enjoyed it in an educational way. Police fucked up in both series though, because of course they did, thats all they ever do [+1]

Tomorrow:

I will wake up at 9:30 again. Work wont call me, but its nice being up at normal human time. I will sleep by 2

Go to [redacted] before bingo to buy a new septum piercing. Ball fell off so i cant wear it down rn, plus i want a change

Go to bingo with grandma. I love her. Im gonna win one of these days

#Spotify

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descendantofthesparrow · 4 years

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commission work - two part- Harry Hook x Reader - Happily Ever After - p1

@musicarose

You woke to cries from the other room, your eyes snapping open. you sat up quickly, blearily looking to the clock on your nightstand, the red lights glowing brightly.

3:15 am

You sniffed, before noticing the cries had stopped, your husband stepping through the bedroom door moments later with your daughter in his arms.

“hey” he whispered hoarsely, the eyeliner smudged around his eyes, making him look even more tired than he was “did she wake yeh?” you hummed and held out your arms, making harry laugh as he walked over to your side of the bed and carefully placed Arella into your arms.

He leaned a little farther and pressed his lips to yours, smiling as he did so “love you lass” he whispered, leaning back and walking around to his side, pulling back his sheets and laying down next to you, laying his head on your lap and cooing up at Arella.

“love you too Harry” you whispered back, kissing Arella’s forehead and leaning back on your pillows with her on your chest, harry staying on your thighs as he stared up at you and Arella with pure love in his eyes.

He still couldn’t believe that he had this, a happily ever after like he was so often told he would never have, because villains didn’t get them.

He was happy, truly happy, he had a beautiful wife and child, with plans for another in about a year, and a big house by the sea, with his own ship (which was a wedding gift from Ben that was more a boat than a ship).

He was nothing like his father, and it was his proudest achievement.

He still remembered the day he met you

He felt his heartbeat loudly as he stared at the (h/c) girl standing next to the brown-haired girl. He swallowed harshly as he heard her voice, it sounded like music to his ears.

What was going on with him?!? He had never felt this way before. Gil looked at him confused as he stared at the girl.

“oh! Aww Ha-“ Harry smacked Gil's shoulder quickly.

“shut the hell up Gil” he muttered darkly, feeling heat creep up his cheeks as he forced his eyes away from her.

He needed to focus.

“hi!” Harry jumped slightly as someone spoke up behind him, he spun around, jaw-dropping slightly as he locked eyes with you “Harry right? We met during the whole…..Audrey fiasco”

You held out your hand, smiling brightly at him, he nervously took your hand, feeling heat creep up his cheeks again. “aye that would be me, and I heard jane call yeh…(y/n)?”

“yep that’s me!” you released his hand, tilting your head adorably, making him mentally scream from it. “I was wondering if you would like to dance?”

“u-um yes!” he squeaked, smiling nervously as you took his once more outstretched hand and dragged him onto the dance floor.

Was this what all those princes and princesses were talking about?

And that set off a whirlwind of events that set his life on the right track, to this day he still got butterflies when he looked into your eyes. And now there was another little light to his life.

His amazing little Arella, who had his eyes and her mother's face and hair. The little girl turned in her mother's arms, her ocean blue eyes staring into his matching ones.

“Hello little love” he cooed, leaning up and kissing her cheek, little happy gurgles coming from her. “yeh just wanted some love didn’t yeh?” you chuckled, knowing as soon as harry had picked her up she had stopped crying.

“go grab some barriers” harry pouted not wanting to leave but obeyed, sitting up and going to the closest, grabbing some baby bed barriers so Arella wouldn’t roll off the bed.

You watched as harry popped the barriers in place, smirking as the light from the moon illuminated his back and arm muscles.

“yer staring~” he teased, smirking at you from over his shoulder. You pouted and rolled your eyes.

“what? I cant stare at my husband?” you teased back, still loving the fact you could call him that.

You looked down at your left hand, giggling as Arella started to try to take the red ruby ring off your finger, you gently pried her hands off, kissing her fingers lightly as you admired the rings.

Your engagement ring was Harrys mother’s, while your wedding ring was a carved golden band with some protection engravings from uma.

Your eyes drifted off, locking on your wedding photo, harry lifting you in a high princess hold, looking up at you as if you were his world, while you looked down at him, pure love and happiness in your eyes.

And then 9 months later arella was born.

…yeah you and harry got pretty busy after the wedding. But anyway back to the main story.

Harry cracked his neck as he stood and walked back over to his side of the bed, laying down properly next to you, quickly kissing your cheek and blowing a raspberry on Arellas cheek.

She let out a loud giggle and reached out for him, you set her between his shoulder and chest and shuffled down to lay next to them, hiking your leg over Harry's hips.

“yeh know, chad told me I would hate a clingy girl but honestly im livin’ meh best life” harry joked, his free hand stroking your leg.

“remind me to kick his butt tomorrow” you sleepily muttered, smiling as Arella yawned and clutched onto your finger.

“yes, ma’am” Harry chuckled, kissing Arella's forehead and closing his eyes.

“Reports have come in about the jolly roger, it is said that captain hook has returned to wreak havoc on neverland and by extension Auradon, we suggest you keep all doors and windows locked until we find him” harry sighed, fingers twitching nervously as he thought of his father running around loose in auradon.

He feared for his wife and child. He sighed, sipping at his water and numbly looking back at the screen.

soon the news switched, to the anniversary of the joining of the isle and Auradon.

Ben was one screen, Mal behind him on his left while Uma stood a couple of feet back on his right, Evie next to her.

“on this day 4 years ago, we finally let down the isle border and reunited our people. And I am proud to say that we have lived well together, the people of the isle finally living without starvation and poverty, and the people of Auradon finally overlooking our prejudice-“

Harry zoned out at that moment, hearing your footsteps from behind him, small wining noises along with your soft speech.

He turned, smiling as he caught sight of you holding Arella, the little babe snuggled into your shoulder, fist in her mouth.

“morning love” he hummed, leaning up for a kiss from you.

“morning” you chirped, handing Arella to Harry and grabbing her breakfast. “so are we still planning on going to the party tonight”

“aye, CJ offered to watch Arella n stuff so we should be good ta go” harry crossed his eyes and stuck his tongue out, Arella bursting out in laughter and making grabby hands at him.

“aww…I love yeh my little princess” he hummed, kissing her forehead and holding her close.

You smiled to yourself as you heard him talk to your little girl, god, you were so lucky meeting and marrying this handsome pirate.

You invited the rest of the vks to chill in your house for a small bit. Uma, Gil, Mal, Ben, Evie, Jay, Carlos, and dude following you inside.

As you walked up the steps, you felt a cold chill run down your spine.

The front door window was smashed open. You looked to harry for a split second before rushing to the door, it was unlocked, you slammed it open calling for CJ.

“CJ?!” you heard slightly whimpers coming from upstairs, you heard harry gasp, looking to the wall, you saw one carved long line leading up the stairs.

Someone had run a blade on the wall as they stalked upstairs.

“CJ WHERES ARELLA!” you screamed, running upstairs, almost tripping over multiple pictures that had been tossed on the ground.

“CJ-“ you looked up, CJ was laying on the ground, a couple of feet away from Arellas room, a large cut on her face.

“CJ!” you kneeled next to her, sighing in slight relief as she only had some bruises on top of her cut.

“wheres-what happened” you stressed, helping her sit up.

“da….da he broke in and-and Arella was screaming an-“ CJs voice broke, glassy eyes looking to the broken door of Arellas room.

You let out a choked sob, standing quickly and joining harry in Arellas room, falling to your knees as she was nowhere in sight, her pillow and bed ripped up, her precious octopus plushie torn to pieces.

“NO!” you screamed, sobbing into your hands, hearing harry fall to his knees next to your and tugging you into his chest, his own tears falling into your hair.

“NO!”

Harry grit his teeth, his old isle rage coming back full force.

His father wouldn’t survive this.

He would make sure of that.

--end of part 1--

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@queer-cosette

@sephiralorange

@lunanight2012

@daughter-of-the-stars11

@random-thoughts-003

@amorathegamingkitsune

#descendants #Descendents #disney descendants #harry hook #harry hook descendants #harry hook x reader #harry hook imagine #commission #2 parter

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yojangjun · 4 years

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Friends-to-lovers!au | sungyoon

Word count: ~3.5k

Summary: where you fall head over heels in love with your best friend, choi sungyoon, and jangjun secretly becomes your wingman.

Note: I saw that theres a lack of golden child stories on here, so I wanted to change that! This is my first time posting an au on tumblr, so hopefully it turns out fine. Feel free to send in requests for any other aus you want to see from the golden child members. Enjoy!

12:39 AM

Y/N: sungyoon

Y/N: sungyoon ah

Y/N: hellooooo

12:45 AM

Y/N: sungyoon

Y/N: okay fine dont answer me

Y/N: :(

Y/N: meanie

12:51 AM

Y/N: choi

Y/N: sung

Y/N: yoon

Y/N: !!!!!!

🐰: do uk what time it is rn

Y/N: you finally answered!!!

Y/N: i cant sleep

🐰: just close your eyes

Y/N: if it was that easy I wouldn’t msg u :’(

🐰: we have class at 8 tmr

🐰: count sheep or bunnies or something

🐰: goodnight

Y/N: i finally got a reply and you’re leaving already??

Y/N: hey! did you really go back to sleep?

12:59 AM

Y/N: fine

Y/N: so much for a best friend

Y/N: who wont help you sleep

Y/N: so mean :(((

Y/N: im only buying ice cream for daeyeol now

1:12 AM

🐰 has sent you a voice message

1:14 AM

Incoming call: 🐰mr rabbit csy🐰

You jump from your bed, “Hello?”

“Come outside.”

You quickly throw on a hoodie on and rush outside, your eyes adjusting to the darkness of the night. Your eyes don’t have to wander for long before landing on a raven haired male, his hoodie flopped over his messy hair. He looks disgruntled, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes as he lets out a yawn. Oops, you definitely woke him up.

You quickly walk up to him, and before you can greet him, are met with a plastic bag offered to you.

“I bought your favorite— green tea flavored.” Your eyes widen before rustling through the contents, pulling out said ice cream.

“Yah, you bought ice cream at this time?” You rip open the wrapper, taking a huge bite of the creamy treat and sigh with delight, “Did you really feel threatened by me buying ice cream for Daeyeol? I was kidding! Well, actually if he asked I probably would, but wow I actually managed to get you to buy me ice cream.”

He ignores you, watching silently as you quickly devour the dessert before pulling out a napkin once he notices the mess that you’ve made on your face.

“Hey!” You whine as he wipes at the corners of your mouth. You try not to lean into the warmth of his touch that you feel even through the napkin; it’s a crisp night after all. You will your cheeks to not grow warm, but your ears quickly glow red instead.

“You’re so messy,” he sighs, finally pulling away and taking note of how you’re unusually quiet. Usually, you would playfully push his hand away, complaining that you weren’t a baby, but your head is turned away, eyes downcast at your shoes. You can see that he’s trying to meet your eyes, but you can’t look at him, not with your heart pounding a mile a minute, nervous and slightly embarrassed.

Pat. You look up as his hand rubs the top of your hair gently, carefully caressing your head through your locks.

“Are you nervous because of the presentation tomorrow? Is that why you can’t sleep?” He muses softly, eyes still trying to meet yours. You grow shy, extremely shy, but shift your eyes to meet his for a brief second before looking away. His eyes dripped of warm honey, enveloping you in a feeling only he could ever have on you.

Seeing you avert your eyes, he takes that as a yes, and brings you closer to him by a tug of the arm. You squeak in surprise, suddenly finding yourself enveloped in his arms. Warmness spreads through your body like a blazing fire, now being fueled by the beating of your heart.

The things you do to me, you think as your arms slowly wrap around his waist, hugging him back. You take in his scent, a scent you’ve come to recognize as familiar and comforting, ever since you met him freshman year.

“I know you have a lot of stage anxiety, but you’ve gotten so much better at public speaking. You’ll do great tomorrow, don’t worry.” Even his voice is warm, his comforting words becoming even more meaningful.

Stage fright was the last thing on your mind at the current moment, but he didn’t have to know that.

If you don’t let me go soon, my heart’s going to explode.

Instead, you nod, allowing yourself to rest your head against his chest. You can feel his heartbeat through his hoodie; a tiny voice in the back of your mind wonders if you have the same effect on him that he has on you.

You stay like that for a while, his arms bringing you closer when you shiver from an incoming breeze.

You wish you could stay like this forever, but you now realize how late it must be, and he’s right, you do have a presentation tomorrow morning, and you do suffer from stage fright still.

“Ah thanks. I’m fine now, I swear,” you start blabbering, reluctantly pulling away from his embrace. You suddenly feel bad; you made him get out of bed for no reason, and he brought you ice cream, “Sorry for troubling you, Sungyoon-ah.”

He sees a pout forming on your face, and he studies you closely.

“I’m your best friend, Y/N, isn’t it my job to make you feel better,” he tilts his head, but doesn’t question you further as you widen the gap between the two of you.

You stare at him blankly before finally smiling at his words, “Sorry, you’re right. I guess the nerves are keeping me awake. But I do feel better now! Thanks for coming, and ah- for the ice cream! I swear I won’t buy any for Daeyeol, only for you, since it seems to bother you so much,” you try to tease him in an attempt to lighten up the mood.

He smiles back, relieved that you seem to be acting normal again. Little did he know, his smile was making your stomach do summersaults, but you tried to push past it as he let out a chuckle.

“Go get some rest, okay? You have a big day ahead,” he ruffles your hair, laughing as you swat his hand away.

“My hair,” you whine, but nevertheless, grin back at him.

“Bye, Sungyoon-ah!””

“Bye Y/N, make sure to wake up on time.”

He waits until you reach the door of your building before turning around and heading back in the direction of his dorm.

As you enter your room, you immediately fling yourself onto your bed and scream into your pillow, kicking your legs.

“Can my heart not do that for once,” you whine, settling on your side as you hug a pillow to your chest.

You allow a smile to spread across your face after a while, cheeks once again flushing red as you remember the feeling of him embracing you.

“I wonder if you feel the same way I feel about you?”

You didn’t know when it had happened, but somewhere along the way, you had fallen in love with your best friend.

---------------

“Y/N!!” You turn around at the sound of your name, yelping as someone jumps on you, almost making you lose your balance.

“Jangjun!” You shove him off of you as he laughs. You turn around and see Donghyun and Joochan following close behind, concentrating on their phones as they play Kart Rider probably. You stare at them for a bit before messing with their phones, randomly touching their screens. They complain in unison, swatting your hands away as you chuckle.

“Did you just get out of class, Y/N?” Jangjun bounces from foot to foot, looking as happy as ever. You shake your head.

“I got out a while ago. I’m just waiting for Sungyoon to get out of class. I promised him I’d buy him ice cream-”

“What, you never buy us ice cream,” Joochan cuts in, finally looking up from his phone as Donghyun shouts in victory.

“Do you want to come with? I’m sure Sungyoon wouldn’t mind,” Joochan quickly shakes his head, holding his hands up.

“I don’t want to be a third wheel on your date, but thanks though,” You sputter at his words, heat quickly rising to your cheeks. Jangjun bursts out laughing at the look on your face, and it takes all your willpower to not punch him.

“D-Date? Sungyoon and I aren’t like that,” You finally manage to say, but your ears are still burning in embarrassment. The three boys look at you expectantly and you grow even more self-conscious, holding your hands up in defense, “Why are you all staring at me like that? It’s true!”

“Anyway, are you going to the fireworks display tonight? I heard it’s going to be really nice. Our school really went all out planning the event!” Jangjun asks, his tone still teasing. You sigh in defeat, but are grateful for the topic change.

“Oh, was that tonight?” You think about the number of assignments you have piled up and grimace, “I don’t know, I kind of got a lot of work to do-”

Jangjun quickly waves you off, “Nonsense! You need to relax once in a while, Y/N.”

As you’re forming a reply, his eyes focus on something behind you and an evil grin appears on his face.

“Oh! Sungyoon hyung, great timing! Y/N is dying to go to the firework display tonight!” Your eyes widen in horror as you realize who exactly Jangjun spotted behind you, “She’s too scared to go alone though, so she wants you to-”

“Lee Jangjun, I swear, I will end you-” You try to whisper threateningly, but he pays you no mind as he waves at who you now know is Sungyoon, finally coming out of his class. Both Joochan and Donghyun are laughing hysterically behind Jangjun, and in that moment, you’ve never wanted the ground to open up and swallow you whole more.

“Hm?” You turn your head as Sungyoon comes to stand next to you. You simply gape at him, at a loss for words as he turns in his head to you curiously, “You wanted to go to that?”

“I- uh, well,” You try your best to muster up an answer, but to no avail. Curse you, Lee Jangjun!

He takes a long look at your face, definitely questioning why you’re acting so strange, before shrugging, “Sure, why not? I think it’ll be fun. Are you guys going?”

You silently plead with Jangjun, staring at him intently. Jangjun hums in thought, deciding to spare you a little.

“Yeah, we’ll be there,” You sigh in relief, not noticing Sungyoon sneak a glance at you.

---------------

“It’s not a date, it’s not a date, it’s not a date,” you repeat to yourself multiple times as you get ready. Yet, you can’t help putting more attention to your outfit, making sure your hair looks at least presentable. As you put on a touch of makeup, you frown. It’s not like this is the first time you’ve hung out with Sungyoon, let alone in a group- he’s your best friend! It is the first time in a while though, as you both have been very busy with school and extracurriculars lately.

“Get your head out of the gutter, Y/N,” You slap your cheeks, “You haven’t hung out with your friends in a while; It’ll be fun!”

---------------

“There he is,” You see Sungyoon leaning against a wall, his eyes glued to his phone. You quietly make your way to him, being extra careful to not get noticed. Once you’re close enough, you tiptoe and lean in close to his ear.

“Boo!”

“Oh, you’re here.”

You pout as Sungyoon simply turns his head in your direction, slipping his phone into his pocket.

“You didn’t even flinch,” You complain, feeling disgruntled. He snorts, pushing off the wall to fully face you. His eyes settle on your figure, making you nervously shift your weight from foot to foot. Silence envelops you as he continues to stare.

“Is there something on my face?” You try to break the silence, feeling shy under his gaze. He tilts his head before humming thoughtfully.

“You look nice,” Your cheeks grow hot almost immediately upon hearing his compliment. You don’t dare meet his eyes, knowing that you would probably combust. Instead, your eyes settle on your shoes, finding them very interesting.

“Ah- thanks,” You squeak out, racking your brain for an appropriate response, “We haven’t hung out in a while, so I thought I would dress up a little more? To not look like a sleep deprived college student, you know-”

Shoot, you were starting to ramble. Quickly shaking your head, you try to change the subject, “Where’s Jangjun and the others?”

“Did they not tell you?” You look up at his words, confused. Seeing the puzzled expression on your face, he continues, “Jangjun said they were going to be late. Something about Joochan and Donghyun fighting over this game, and they’re pretty serious about it.”

You stop yourself from screaming at the world.

“Let me message Jangjun real quick.” He nods his head as you take your phone out of your pocket. He doesn’t miss how your mood has soured upon learning of the absence of your friends.

6:49 PM

Y/N: Lee

Y/N: Jangjun

Y/N: You are dead.

Y/N: When I find you, you better run

🐮: Woah, Y/N, calm down!

🐮: We’ll only be an hour or two late, no biggie :9

🐮 : Have fun on your date tho~ But not too much fun, okay?

🐮 : ;))))

“I’m going to murder that guy,” You curse underneath your breath, letting out a big sigh as you put your phone back in your pocket.

“Everything okay?” You jump, remembering where you are. Sungyoon has an unreadable expression on his face as he studies you, and you try not to get too caught up in his gaze.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” You try to reassure him, but your smile is weak, “Let’s just go.”

You both start walking towards the food stands at the entrance of the field, trying not to get too caught up in your nerves.

It’s not a date. It’s not.

“Y/N?” You look up, and find Sungyoon farther ahead than you thought he was. It’s suddenly crowded as everyone is trying to get food before the show starts. As someone pushes past you, Sungyoon’s hand reaches out to grasp your wrist and pulls you close to him.

“Be careful, it’s really crowded here.” Your head automatically nods, not trusting your voice to say anything as all your attention goes to the grip he has on your wrist. His hand lowers until your palms touch, and he squeezes your hand. His hold is gentle and warm, making butterflies dance in your stomach. You let yourself be dragged by the pull of his hand as he weaves through the crowd.

The time spent at the food stands is relatively enjoyable. Both of you haven’t eaten before coming, so you allow yourselves to look through all the stalls, buying all the food you want. You easily share your food and quickly fall into a comfortable pace, laughing and finally relaxing.

You do notice that once your hands are empty, Sungyoon reaches out to grasp the one closest to him. You convince yourself that it’s because he doesn’t want you to get lost, having experienced your lack of sense of direction first-hand. Still, you allow yourself a bit of giddiness, glancing down at your hands occasionally.

Having filled your stomachs, you both finally settle down on one of the provided picnic blankets laid out on the grass, the show nearing its start time.

As you hum absentmindedly, taking a picture of the darkening sky with your phone, you see Sungyoon staring at you from the corner of your eye. You turn your head in his direction, tilting your head, “What?”

He shakes his head, propping his chin on his hand, “Nothing, it’s just…”

“Hm?”

“I’m glad you’re having a good time,” He finally says after a long pause, turning his head to look up at the sky, “I feel like you’ve been distant lately? Not that I blame you, school is in full swing after all. But you’ve definitely been acting a little strange; I thought the stress was getting to you.”

He then turns to you, suddenly smiling, “But you seem to be in a better mood now, so I’m happy.”

Your eyes widen in surprise, the nature of his words dawning on you.

You really messed up, didn’t you?

Before you can respond, a loud horn goes off, signaling the start of the fireworks show. You both turn to look up the night sky as one after another, balls of colored flame shoot up and explode with a giant pop.

You lower your eyes to stare at Sungyoon, the fireworks casting various hues of color on his face, highlighting his features. You didn’t realize it, but you had probably grown more distant as your feelings for him bloomed, becoming too nervous to simply hang out with him anymore. And here he was, just happy that you were finally having a good time with him.

What a best friend you are.

You’re suddenly overwhelmed, feeling guilty for having worried him, yet grateful that he’s still the same Sungyoon that you met back in freshman year, the same person who is in tune with your feelings no matter the situation, who at the end of the day just seeing you happy makes him happy; he’s the one you fell in love with.

Before you can even process what you’re about to say, your mouth opens.

“Sungyoon-ah. I like you.”

You clasp your hand over your mouth, your eyes widening in surprise. Did you just-

You quickly bury your face in your arms, your face blazing. Your heart feels like it’s going to explode out of your ribcage, the embarrassment hitting you in waves.

You did not just confess, you did not, you did not-

“Y/N.” You refuse to look up, afraid of what you’d just done. You just confessed to your friend, your best friend! You feel tears well up in your eyes at the possibility of having ruined your friendship.

“Hey, look at me,” His voice is surprisingly gentle, not the tone you were expecting at all. You mentally count to ten in your head before gathering enough courage to look up at him. Your breath hitches in your throat as your eyes finally meet his, his face growing closer to yours.

“Can you repeat what you said?” He asks, not breaking eye contact with you as your body grows hot, keeping his gaze steady. The fireworks up in the sky are long forgotten as you visibly gulp before clearing your throat.

“I- I like you, Choi Sungyoon,” You muster out, willing yourself to not look away, “I like you a lot.”

The anticipation makes your stomach drop; you can hear your heart pounding wildly in your ear as you wait for his response. He gazes at you for a while before smiling.

“I like you, too.” He says easily, leaving you utterly shocked. He looks away as you gape at him, not believing your ears. He raises a hand to his nose, scratching it awkwardly.

“Wait- what- I-” Your mouth can’t keep up with your thoughts, your mind an absolute mess, “Did you- huh?”

It warms your heart when you finally catch the red glow of his ears- a shy Sungyoon wasn’t something you witnessed every day.

He shyly runs a hand through his hair, “I said I like you, too. And I have, for a while now.”

“Oh.” Your face quickly matches the shade of his ears, maybe even more so. But a wave of relief and giddiness passes through you and you can’t help but smile widely once the words process in your brain.

Because your best friend felt the same way about you.

You spend the rest of the night in comfortable silence, your heart still beating fast, but it’s a good kind of warmth that spreads through you, one that makes you feel like all is right in the world.

You don’t realize when he draws close, but suddenly your hands are touching, his shoulder grazes yours and his breath is right next to your ear. You slowly turn your head in his direction, your breath hitching upon realizing how close his face is to yours.

You close your eyes, grasping his hand as you take a deep breath and lean forward. When your lips meet, it’s like your heart is mimicking the explosion of the fireworks in the sky. All these feelings surge through you as you share a kiss, and you swear you’re flying.

As you part, you both look away shyly; your face is blazing, your heart still hammering in your chest. You don’t complain when he tugs on your arm and brings you close to him, letting you lean your head on his shoulder as you continue watching the sky together.

#golden child #golden child scenarios #golden child au #sungyoon #choi sungyoon #y #golden child y #golcha #gncd #gncd scenarios #sungyoon scenarios #y scenarios #kpop scenarios #kpop #au #friends to lovers #woollim

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pbandjesse · 3 years

Text

I got a vaccine appointment! I dont exactly feel better, but I am excited. I am mostly annoyed it was such an ordeal and I wouldnt have gotten it if James wasnt working at home and watching my email for me. They didnt even text me again after last night. I got an email right when I woke up and it again didnt let me make an appointment. But James kept my email open all day and kept an eye on it and was able to snag me an appointment for tomorrow morning. But like I feel mad that people who cant be looking at their email all day are going to have so much trouble and it just sucks thats how they are doing it. I really hope they can make this better cause it sucks.

Today was kind of draining though. I slept alright last night and didnt feel to bad when I got up. I got washed and dressed. I had breakfast. I wandered around the apartment. I didnt want to do much. I decided to make another sweatshirt. I combined felt letters and I think it looks pretty wicked. I need more letters though. Im almost all out of vowles. But I like my new Death sweater and it is very cozy.

I left here to head to work and it was a very warm day again! I enjoyed my walk and got to the site a little early. I washed my hands and did my temperature before I headed upstairs.

While it was a smaller group today, man was it a lot. Screaming fights. A broken table. Tears for no reason. Thankfully it was just for small moments, and most of the time they were fine. But the yelling was a lot. I felt a little unsupported because there were a lot of empty threats of sending kids home. And then got a talking to because I was sitting with a child showing them how to knit when one of the first screaming fits happened and I didnt stand up fast enough I guess? I have no idea. It doesnt make me want to be there, thats for sure.

But there were nice moments. Some of the kids decided to brush and braid my hair. Mostly the boys, which was funny mostly because they were so persistent but they did not know what they were doing.

We played games and played with play dough. The kids had a yoga class that they hated but I told them they couldnt go to the gym if they didnt participate so all but 2 got themselves together. So those two sat out for a couple minutes but then rejoined. I just felt like there was a lot of stress in the space today and that made it hard. But we tried to keep it together.

I found out from James about my vaccine appointment later in the afternoon. I was really excited. We were watching Home Alone and I got the text and I was so excited. I let my manager and coworker know that I would probably be late tomorrow. I am hoping I dont have any side effects that zap my energy, like the flu shot sometimes does. But it will be alright. Im real excited to get the process started. and it looks like James is on a list now too so thats good.

We finished up the day a little early. And I got to walk home with sun still outside. James was still working when I got back here so I started making pasta.

We had dinner. Sat around together. I organized my bag. I am switching to a backpack since Im biking tomorrow. I played a little animal crossing. And then me and James played a puzzle game together. I took a bath and washed my hair. And now were in bed watching true crime videos.

I feel a little down. But I think Im just sleepy. I have to leave here early tomorrow so I am not late to the appointment downtown. Im glad I get to bike there. Im still nervous.

Wish me luck. Sleep well everyone. Goodnight!

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wakandascrystal · 5 years

Text

ʀᴇʟɪᴄ

Erik x Black Reader

Summary: Erik finds an old picture of you and an Ex. He recognises him and tells you about the man that saved his life in Afghanistan .

A/N - Warning⚠, I’m going to make this as emotional as i can. please ignore any errors

🌹🎀🎈 🌹🎀🎈🩱🍑❤🌸💕 🩱🍑 🌹🎀🎈🩱🍑❤🌸💕 🌹🎀🎈🩱🍑❤🌸💕

“Are you on your way here?“ You mother asked over the phone.

“Yes, we are. We might take a pit stop and buy something, do you want anything from the shop?“ You asked polity.

“Yes, get me some milk and cookies. The ones I like. The ones they dip in chocolate.“

“Okay, Ma. No problem. We’ll be there in 20 minutes okay?“ “Yeah yeah. Is my beautiful son in law coming or are you coming with Jade“

“Ma you are on speaker!!“ You were tempted to just hang up but you knew she would kill you. Erik was of no help. He just grinned foolishly.

“Yes. The son in law is driving.“ You slurred

“Hello, Mrs Johnson.“ Erik’s deep voice filled the car

“Erik? What did I tell you about calling me, Mrs Johnson? Call me Mom.“ the was a pause

“Alright, Mrs Johnson.“

“I’m nothing going to tell you twice now. Come on Im your mama.“ Your mom pushed.

You could see Eri wasn’t ready to do that. He had nothing against your mother. He actually liked her but Erik was still working on the emotions he had with his own mother. Even though he lost her along time again the issue was still sensitive and sore.

“Okay, Mrs Johnson we are about to enter the highway so we will see you. Bye“ You hung up and sat back in the leather seat.

“I’m sorry about that?“

“Nah it’s cool.“

You didn’t believe him.

“I’m sure she didn’t mean to make you uncom- ”

“I said let’s drop it Y/N“ His voice was stern and hostile. You saw how his hands tightened on the wheel, the muscles under his skin expanding with the pressure. He was tense. You feared that your mother might have triggered him. You quickly put on some music to calm him down. You put on your favourite lo-fi playlist. You knew it would calm him down and it did.

Driving 130km/hr you rest your hand on his thigh. You wanted him to slow down, doing this was much better than telling him to slow down. Gently moving your fingers on his inner thigh he slowed down.

It was raining and Erik had no business speeding on the highway.

He was driving to your moms. He had agreed to help your mom clear out your old room and the attic. She lived in the countryside, the other side of the state but with Erik’s mustang and driving skills, he could get you there in no time.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you.“ He took your hand and kissed it.

“Don’t be, I understand.“

You pulled your hand from his placing it on his thigh again. This was the best part. When you were comfortable enough to talk and be okay with him. It took a long time to understand him, the way he showed himself and the parts he didnt want to show. It took some time to understand that Erik was more than just some nigga from Oakland. He was different.He loved differently and you were ready to be with him no matter what.

“It’s a good thing you didn’t take out your braids yesterday.“ You didn’t hear him until he nudged your shoulder.

“Yes?“ You pulled out of your train of thought.

“What are you thinking about there.“

“Nothing. I’m just sleepy.“

“You should have slept earlier. 11 o'clock is too late.“

“I had work Erik…but if somebody didn’t wake me up for some action in the middle of my sweet slumber then I would have had my eight hours.“ you folded your arms across your chest.

He was smiling again.

“What did I tell you about sleeping naked.“

“Erik I always sleep naked cause cloths tighten and roll up on me when I move ….they make me feel uncomfortable. “

“Okay ..but you could have stopped me at any time though…“

“…Fuck you right“ You laughed a bit as he pulled into a petrol station thinking about last night’s events.

You offered to go buy all the things you need for the weekend but he didn’t want you getting wet. So you told him what yall needed and he left. After a couple of hours, you were very close to your Mother’s house and Erik pulled into her driveway.

“My favourite people!“ She closed the space between her and Erik with a welcoming hug. His head fit in her collarbone. She really liked him.

Disappearing into your old room, you left them behind in the kitchen.

Your room looked the same. Nothing was changed or moved. The double bed with all your TLC, Destiny’s Child, Aaliyah, Ashanti and most importantly the Tupuk poster were still up.

You could tell your mom still came in and cleaned once in a while. There is no way your white bedding would still look so fresh and clean after 2 years and no dust. Yes, she did. You looked under your bed to find a box. It was filled with your all memories. Old letters and bracelets. Erik hugged you from behind as you looked at through the objects. You kissed him and sat on the bed.

“Look at this stuff. She still kept it.“ Erik started to look through with you.

“Your mom said we will start cleaning up tomorrow cause your tired and its late .“ You agreed while you read your high school report cards.

“I Was getting B’s and C’s like it was nobody’s business.“ you smile

Erik was interested in all the objects in the box. He wanted to know you better and when an opportunity showed itself he would grab it with both hands.

“You used to play…what the hell is this.”

You looked over him to the picture of you holding a bat.

“Oh, first-team badminton… it’s like Tennies..a bit .”

You let out a high pitch scream.

“Damn Y/N what the hell.”

“I’m sorry but look. I remember buying this lucky packet thing and finding this ring in it. Then I saw a shooting star and wished a handsome, intelligent nigga would marry me.”

“Did it work.” “Yes, it did.” You gave him a kiss on the cheek and went back pulling things from the box. A few minutes went by and you notice how Erik went quite. He was holding the stack of photographs that didn’t make into your photo album.

“What’s got my baby’s attention.”

He carried on staring at the old photographs, you lean up against him again to see what picture had his attention. It was an old picture of your ex-boyfriend giving you a kiss on the cheek. You rolled your eyes.

“Oh come one E. You know your girl was fire back then. I …was bringing all the boys in the yard.” He stayed very serious, focusing on the picture of your Ex planting a kiss on your cheek.

“What was his name?” He asked

“Don’t tell me you’re jealous…You married me ..You won nigga" You giggled

“‘I know….but I think I know him.” Your eyebrows shot up

“`From where?… His name is Flex..”

“Shit.”

“What…what’s wrong?”

“Was his surname O’Brien..”

“Yeah, I think so…It’s been so long though. After graduating I don’t know where he even ended up.“

He didn’t move, just staring at the picture.

“You alright?“ He worried you. His whole aura had changed.

“I know him…He served with me.“ The sorrow and pain in his voice made you pay full attention to him.

If he did know Flex he must have done something terrible for him to be so emotional all of a sudden. But flex was not like that. You remembered him to be soft and kind. Sure he likes to cause tribble but none that could hurt anyone.

You placed the diary you held and sat next to him. taking his hand.

“You want to talk about it.“

“Nah. It’s late you should get some sleep.“

“You sure? I would much rather hear you vent.“ He smiled

“Let’s get ready for bed.“ He left you to grab your luggage from the car. By the time he got back from the car, Your dad had arrived. He loved Erik.

‘The son I never had’ he always says. You found them in the kitchen talking about the upcoming game. He seemed much happier then he did before. He could cheer up anyone, to be honest.

“So you came to help your mother with moving?“

“Yes, Sir. Me and Y/N can handle it don’t worry yourself.“

“What do you mean me, Erik? I only came for emotional support“ You played along with your husband.

“Nah we are going to put all them pilates and squats into good use tomorrow. Remember to leave with your back.“ Both your father and husband laughed holding onto each other.

“Daddy!!“ they both looked at you. It made you smile that Erik would respond to that even if your real father was present. You fixed your face and pouted to get him on your side.

“Dad. Erik is bullying me.“

Adorable Erik though

“I’m sorry sunshine. I was lucky that Erik was free to help. You know since my back kicked in I can’t do anything.“

“-except eat my pies and cooking” Your mom came into the kitchen holding a basket of laundry.

“You got that right.” shocking her head and called you over.

“Y/N why don’t you make the table. I’ll be back to dish up the food for dinner.”

You agreed and did as told, after dinner. You all got ready for bed. For the first time, you didn’t get weird looks from your mom and dad when it was time for sleeping arrangements. Before the wedding, Erik was just some nigga trying to take advantage of their only baby but after the wedding, Erik was the beautiful, nigga angel who was sent to protect their only child from the world. It was strange, and the funny part was Erik didn’t change he was the same chilled guy. But your parents didn’t want you sharing a bed with him. The Christian side of them just couldn’t let that happen. You wondered if they ever figured out that you would just pull him from that uncomfortable, couch around midnight to sleep with you in your bed and end up fucking. It would be weird if they did.

“Before you get up and leave. I would just like to say something..don’t be shy. Do what needs to be done” You knew exactly where this was going.

“Mom please.” You begged

“I need to say this Y/N…Erik I would like to have some grandchildren.”

Erik spat out his wine. It was too funny. It seems like he had not gotten used to how open your mom was. You helped clean him up and left before she said more embarrassing things.

You started getting ready for bed. Brushing your teeth in your silky pj’s. Erik was already in bed. He looked beautiful. He only had his bottoms on, hair all the way back in 3 cornrows. He could see that you were checking him out. Even though he was scrolling through his emails.

“You want to take a picture, Love?“ You giggled. His favourite sound in the world.

“I already have a ton of them, but the real deal looks much better.“ You climber in bed with just his bed lamp on.

“You don’t say. Are you not cold?“

“No. You?“

“No?“ He gave you a kiss and laid down on his back so did you. He turned the lap off and in the silence, you asked.

“Do you think we should fuck so we can have kids ?“ Your voice was little

“What the hell“ Erik let out a laugh, his whole body shook.

“You being pressured by your mom baby?“

“No. I’m in no rush..like at all but we’ve never really spoken about it, Erik.“

“I want to have kids with you, but when the time is right. We still working on us right now. 3 years of marriage that is not a long time. I’m planning on being with you for the longest, like your mom and pops. 57 years.“

“I want to be with you for longer than that.“ You sounded corny and cheesy saying that. Erik smiled thinking you were. But you were his cheesy and corny girlfriend.

“Period…But I do want kids…I want to show them Wakanda and shit. I would love that. “ He said it confidently leaving no room for you to doubt him. ”Plus we live in a great area. They got a good school. You know his ass is practically going to live in that outreach centre. “

“What makes you think it’s going to be a boy?“ you smacked his chest.

“…what ..it could be a girl…or better twins.“

You gasped. “Like Beyonce,” you whisper dramatically.

You laid on your side so you can see his profile. The small light that comes from the parted curtains helped you see that his eyes were closed. You left for the bath. In the dead of night is when you insecurities seemed to be the most active.

They questioned why Erik liked you, why he married you and if you were worthy to even carry his children. They told you that there were much better girls out there. Who were more attractive. Who could make him much happier than you could ever? At night, when everyone was asleep. The mirror was your worst enemy but somehow the Wakanden gem on your ring fingers reassure you that you were right where you belong.

“Are you asleep?“ you whispered to Erik when you came back from the bathroom. He didn’t answer but he pulled you close to his body. Your head laid on his chest and your arm on his stomach.

after a few minutes of silence, he spoke.

“I was drafted with Felix.“

You didn’t say anything still trying to process the fact that your high school ex-boyfriend somehow knew Erik.

“You still listening..?“ You nodded your head against his chest still in shock.

“We didn’t train together but he was put into the team that left….long story short…i served with your Ex In Afghanistan.’‘ He gave a silent laugh. You felt his body shake.

“What are the odds.“ He said

“-It was crazy. I came in there. Young kid, trying to prove to everyone that am the shit. I had no idea what the fuck I was doing. He was…how do I put it…he lost his shit every time a gun went off. I guess he was there to prove he was the shit too.“

Yep, that’s definitely him. You remembered him to be funny and witty and non-violent. You wondered what made him join the military.

“His bed was next to mine. He Latino so he was super chilled and super talkative. Won’t lie he annoyed me at first but we ending up being …kinda close.“

“Omg, this that is so adorable….. I should invite him over and have like a reunion some time. I’m sure I can find him on facebook or something..“

His head shot down at you with an unreadable expression. You thought you might have offended him, maybe he thought the idea was stupid.

“Chill E. We don’t have to do it if you don’t want to.“

“You don’t know don’t you?“ His voice was hollow and soft.

“Know what?“

“On one of the last days….we were coming back in 3 days. We had to patrol around the wrecked city. We had done this many times. The locals just went about their way…but that day Felix just ….he told me like 10 times he wasn’t feeling it…He knew something was off the second we left the base. And he was right. In the middle of the city, we were ambushed. ..Young kid from Oakland…I thought I was going to die. “ He gave a weak smile

“The base got word of what was happening and they sent help. We lost so many good soldiers but Felix and I made it out, as we ran out……all I’m thinking is I can’t wait to go home….but from a distance window Felix sees a sniper and jumpers in front of me when he heard the shoot….I’ve heard stories of what a Lapua Magnum bullet can do to a human body…seeing it in real life was something else..I didn’t have time to hold him ..close his eyes. He saved my life. But bet… after a few seconds I got the shoot. There was no way I wouldn’t avenge his death….right here. “

He raised his right arm and pointed to one scare on his arm… That scar was for the shoot. Erik had told you what the scars were for and it clicked. You felt heartbroken and angry for so many reasons but you couldn’t tell Erik immediately because he was still speaking. In all honesty, your brain stopped taking in information when you figured out Felix died. Your eyes water and a throbbing pain soaked up your heart. He was a good guy. He didn’t deserve that. You thought about his mother and his sister. They must have lost it when they found out. But that could have been your morning a death if Felix didn’t do anything..if he didn’t jump in Erik’s way. Maybe with how the universe works and timelines, you would never even have met Erik; that was a dark thought you just didn’t want to dwell on for too long.

Erik saw your face. The light passes him and lands on your downcasted face. You looked distressed but he doesn’t regret telling you this. Your eyes are glossy with tears that are about to fall. You stop trying to fight the boiling emotions in your chest. They are hot and they sting and they want out. You push yourself into Erik and let out a cry. On his chest, your head laid visibly shaking.

He had never seen you cry like this in the past. 6 years of knowing you and not once. It wasn’t like the crying or sobbing you did when you watched romantic anime or kdramas or when he surprises you(cause you’re easy to please). This cry was deep and dark. It reminded him of pain and devastation. He wrapped his arms around you so your parents would hear. He hated your reaction. It also showed him how empathic of a person you were.

“Can we go…” Your voice rough and small. “- Can we go see his grave?”

Erik’s face pulled up in confusion and you saw.

“Erik! He was my friend. I know …it sounds like we were was just dating and fucking…He was my actual friends and I’m so angry and hurt…I thought he was in Austria with his father. That’s what he always told me..that when he graduated he would move there…”

You wiped your tears that had wet half your face.

“-…i ..I also want to thank him…He also saved you..” You laced your fingers with his. Yours were tiny against his. “I want to thank him for that.”

Erik didn’t push. He simply agreed. He wanted to make you happy. So anything you wanted was a comrade.

You stayed in that position, his hand over your waist and your head just by his chest, He heard your body try to recover. The rain had picked up, hitting and creating a calming noise. you fell asleep in his arms grateful and depressed.

You thought about how hard destiny has been fighting to make sure Erik ended up with you. You thought about all the fights, his past, your past, the shit that went down in Wakanda, the girls and boy the nasty ass girl that wanted him. He was meant to be there. you were meant to be there. And the thought of that and the low humming of the rain sent you to sleep.

🌹🎀 🌹🎀🎈🩱🍑❤ 🌹🎀🎈🩱🍑❤🌸💕 🌹🎀🎈🩱🍑❤🌸💕 🌸💕 🎈🩱🍑

🌹Mini Tag list 🌹

@raysunshine78

@kpizzletrash

@eye-raq

@chaneajoyyy

@amethyst1993

@dessianna1

@wakandantings

@princessstevens

@theogbadbitch

#erik x reader #erik imagine #Erik Killmonger #Erik killmonger x Reader #Erik Stevens #Erik Kilmonger #Erik #blackpanther #blackreader #inlaws #erik fluff #marriage

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blake-nikos · 4 years

Text

The longest DnD backstory i have made... so far

so small bit of context this is for a 5e game in a 18th century bloodborne style setting. it was meant to be one shot so i just made lady maria of the astral clock tower as my character, but the dm really likes the setting and how the game went so its becoming a full game, but i really liked how i played lady maria but i wanted something a little more then a dnd version of a bloodborne boss so i wrote this over the last few hours and its now 5:30 am oops The lady maria real name Blair ( insert appropriate lore last name with vanhellsing vibes to it ) class blood hunter level 10 Born into a noble house the daughter of a previous lady maria that died during child birth and a noble man, that was once a charming artist and writer but reduced to a cowardly shell of a man after the death of his first love, even though he has re married he never found his passions for the arts again now only making bland history text books for schools and little else. all through Blair's early life her grandfather on her mothers side would come around every few months bring gifts and tails of his latest monster hunts and the promise of "once your older if you wish it, I'll take you away from this stale noble life" as she grew her grandfather started training her in swordsmanship and fire arms, her farther forbid the training but the grandfather kept coming till one day he had the town guards waiting and threaten to have him killed if he took "his last piece of her away" blair over heard this but didn't understand at the time only being around 9 years old confused as her farther barely could even stand to look at her most days. Her grandfather didn't come for 3 years after that point, till one night blare started getting ravens at her window with short notes and pages taken from swordsmanship manuals page by page every day over time forming more then a few books on different styles of fighting and firearm manufacture and such. she trained every day till her hands were blistered from the bits of wood and furniture she had been using as wooden swords to train with in her bedroom. On the day before her 14th birthday she noticed a hooded figure with a raven in the small woods out her window, she grabbed a small kitchen knife she had stolen and suck out looking for them. it didn't take long till she was deep in the woods only to be startled by a well made wooden sword being thrown to her feet "pick it up and fight for your birthday present little one" the look of joy forced down by one of determination she picked up the sword and took the guard positions she'd been practicing for all this time, swing hard but true to form never faltering a step in her foot work, pushing the old man on to is back foot , not one to show to much mercy and a reflex from years of fighting he pushed hard in to his next swing and disarmed her of her wooden sword just as he dropped his guard about to gloat " guess some ones not getting her..." shes rushes him gets her body under his guard position thrusts her arms right up under his chin and with the stolen kitten knife to his neck "took you long enough old man" drops the knife to her side and hugs him tight enough she may have heard some of is old bones crack. and starts to cry into his chest. "okay alright little one, you won the fight now need to crush me now" as he hugs her back for a moment. "i know its been a while " only to hear " too long " as she kicks him in the shin "if you hit me again no present " She pules back to look at him to notice a few more scars on his face then last time she spoke to him. he stands up straight and calls out “ lady maria please come meet my grand daughter” As a hooded woman with a raven on her shoulder looking to be in her late 30s steps out from behind a tree. she steps forward and curtsy towards Blair “ its a honor to meet you little miss, i knew your mother well, and she would be very proud of such a skilled young fighter” she says with a smile, a head tilt and a slight tear in her eye “ you most certainly have her eyes and expressions... its like looking at a memory right before me” Blair looks to her before looking down to the dirt “ ive only heard story's from granddad and farther locked all the paintings of mum in the attic i haven't seen them in years” her grandfather after swallowing his anger “ well this just wont do “ and pulls out a locket from his pocket “ i have a portrait of her above the mantel in my family manner, why don't you hold on to this one, till you come see it for your self “ as he hands her the locked with a small picture of her mother inside. she holds it close before placing it around her neck. “but now little one its your birthday tomorrow and that's not your gift this is!” as the lady maria grabs a fabric wrapped sword from behind her “this was hers it needed some repairs after she put it aside when she moved in with your father, but its been cleaned sharped and has a fresh coat of sliver” Blair takes the wrapping off the sword to see a brilliant sliver coated steel scabbed, a saber with a enlarged almost small sword style handle and guard. she clips it to her belt and draws the blade “its heavy... well compared to a chair leg but the balance feels much nicer, this, this is mine now ?” her grandfather smiles “yes little one cant have you training with chair legs forever now can we, plus you will need a real blade when our lady maria hear starts training you in our family's blood magic next week ” Blair now looking rather confused “ blood magic?” the grandfather draws a dagger from his belt and slices the the blade along his palm as the blood runs down the blade it starts to crackle and spark with lightning he throws the blade at a tree and it sparks with a brilliant light and shark cracking sound like a small bolt of lighting, “now little one this is a family secret so don't go talking about magic, can you promise me that and don't let your father find that sword?” she nods her head with gusto “ yes sir ! totally, easy, no problem. and he wont look at me any way so its easy to steal stuff and sneak around ” the day starts to grow long and they say there goodby’s for now 3 years of weakly training some times with grandfather, some times with lady maria, some times with both and some times with a different lady maria she dresses the same and spoke the same formal way for the most part but much younger she explained “lady maria is not my name little one its a title... all the lady maria's are in some way related even you. im actually your cousin my name is Juliet. the older lady maria you met the first night was my aunt and your mothers sister. On her 16th birthday and a few years of Blair being a rebellious young teen and making trouble for the towns guard and her farther getting more and more strict as she aged, Blair promptly set out with trying to ruin her farther reputation especially when the step mother started pressing to “marry her off “ even though the farther was against it the step mother started making plans for marriage behind his back. Blair being a witty young trouble maker found out about her plans and took it as a challenge and found a new form of combat training in bar fights and sneaking to the next town over and drinking with the army boys in training. till it go to the tipping point a argument with her farther that was promoted by the step mother yelling at him for the better part of the day, when she came home at dusk one evening not looking to worse for ware but about as far lady like as one can get, her father going straight in to yelling “whats wrong with you!? why must you fight against the best life you’ll ever get? how ungrateful are you ! “ the step mother butting in “ your mother would be ashamed you” with out hesitation from across the room Blair pulls a knife cuts her palm and utters a Blood Curse of Bloated Agony on the step mother and drops the step mother to her knees in pain “ you know nothing about her you good for nothing noble piece of trash” “ and dad i don’t know if you hate me... or blame me for killing mum by being borne, but you never loved me you never gave me what i needed!, and you took away the only person that could! you stopped granddad from coming you took the one person that loved me! you left me with nothing what did you expect!? her farther now yelling at Blair to stop this “fine if you want to be with him so badly then leave but if you do your title stays behind your money you’ll will be nothing more then a common present!” “OH but father i have a title you could never take I’m the lady maria” as she drops the curse go’s to her room packs a travel bag grabs her mothers sword and walks right by her father who is trying to calm the step mother now screaming for a doctor and calling Blair a witch, on the way out Blair with sword worn proud on her side, she hesitates for a moment in the door way with her back to her farther, and can hear him over the sound of the now rageing woman next to him “what have i done Ive lost her again... i’m sorry i’m so sorry” blair pretends not to hear him and walks away in to the night. after another year of training now at the grandfathers manor and returning the locket, she started going on monster hunts and when the war came true and proper she fought right besides the young army boys from time to time as a mercenary and protected them from the monsters by night, even earning some honorary militarily ranks. now a few years after the war shes now 31 and has been a proper lady maria for a good while fighting monsters and making stories of her own.

#dnd backstory

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oh-shit-a-baby · 4 years

Text

BLACK FRIDAY THOUGHTS PART TWO

A complete compilation of my thoughts throughout the musicals second half,,, this bois going to be real long bc I have a lot of thoughts lol

Now without @drawinglinesinarbitraryplaces :(

Yep dumbledore can still sing

Omg his voice

This song is going to make me cry aaaaa

Becky: you don’t look at all the same as I remember

Me: yeah no shit dumbledore grew a beard

Jesus,,,,, theyre just going to go for it right there,,,,,, ookay

Wtaf is this movie they’re watching

HOLY SHIT HER VOICE IS /PRETTY/ HER RANGE IS HUGE!!!

Idk if this is an unpopular opinion bc no one has an opinion yet but Becky and toms song is the cutest one ever and a bop and I love it

Jesus they payed for a balcony and they’re going to fucking use it aren’t they

WELCOME TO PEIP HQ IM SO DOWN FOR THAT

OH THERE ARE MANY DIMENSIONS????? U GONNA EXPLAIN THAT MR GENERAL MACNAMARA????

The black and white isn’t that what lexs sister was on about

Wiggly is the king u wot m8

President kurt knows nothing about anything and that’s a mood

So if the next movie isn’t about ‘13 years ago’ imma freak

U WANNA SEND ME INTO THE FUCKIN TWILIGHT ZONE AND HAVE DINNER WITH THE DEVIL??????!?!!

NO!!! FUCK THAT!!!!! FUCK THAT!!!!! FUCK THAT!!!!!

^^^president kurt quotes

In short, mr president, we are trying to stop the birth

*dramatic piano*

Of a god.

*dRAMATIC PIANO*

It’s good score tho 10/10

Sherman young

Nuff said

After today’s great battle???

Faith in the one true god!! All hail wiggly!!!

My new religion lol

LET LAKESIDE MALL BE A NEW JERUSALEM!!!!

*cue joey and Robert just screaming wiggly for like 5 mins straight*

NO THEY FOUND LEX

OH YEAH FUCKIN KILL THEM!!!

Who????????

FUCK YEAH LINDA

CULT??? NO! ITS A NEW EXCITING RELIGION THAT I STARTED!!!!

Yeah Gerald

She pronounces Cinnabon as see-nah-bohn what’s up with that lol

I NEED A WIGGLY DOLL...... IDEALLY FOUR OF THEM!!!

IVE MET GOD. HE HAD NOTHING NICE TO SAY ABOUT YOU.

*cue people dying and their mics stopping working*

Holy fuck they all wanna kill Hannah now (lexs sister gets a name now apparently)

LAUREN I LOVE YOU AS A VILLAIN

I would kneel before villain Lauren any day

I will deestroy everything, and then I will deestroy everything, and then I will deestroy everything and then I will oh shit it’s Gerald.

While I don’t want you to think for yourselves I do want you to understand what I mean when I say my evil shit

I’m sorry that choreo is a yike

ETHAN DARLING COME BACK I MISS YOU <<<333333

IM CRYING NOW

He’s in the black and white now we’ll that sounds like shit

NOT ETHAN

Hannah is the unsung hero of this musical so far

*said in wiggly voice* well, webby (Hannah’s spider imaginary friend who I think is gonna be the deus ex machina of this thing) is a stupid bitch!

Rotten little banana. I’m going to peel you. I’m going to split you in two. I’m going to eat you Hannah. I’m going to eat you right now. *all said in dramatic wiggly voice*

Aaand their mics broke again

We don’t get tricked! We’re grown ups!

And Becky and Tom are immediately evil the second they see the wiggly bc of course they are

Jesus beckys the villain???????

Welcome to the musical where everyone gets a villain song AND a hero song??????

Her voice is still beautiful

*Prancing around* DO YOU WANT SOME CANDYYYYY??????

She’s still wearing ethans hat my heart is going to go oh my god

And he just,,,,, leaves Becky to die?????

President Kurt in a space suit oh my god

And America is great again is playing in the background

MACNAMARA SAID ‘GODSPEED’ AND IS THAT A CATCHPHRASE I SENSE THERE

Yeah no president kurt can’t do foreign policy

His name is like howie or something but imma call him president kurt just like Tom was dumbledore for like the first half of this mess

Oh fuck joeys character is here and he’s gonna FUCK PREZ KURT UP

He’s eating an apple that means he’s a asshole

Holy fuck joeys character is like the ultimate capitalist

And also terrifying holy shit

NO MACNAMARA DONT GO IN THERE

Joeys character: Do you think that in the Netherlands they’d care about some toy??? Nah!!! They’re too busy with their free vacations and FREE healthcare!!

(When I refer to joeys character I mean the evil one he just doesn’t have a name yet so idk what to call him)

And joey can still sing I love him

His voice is so good and this whole villain is giving me spies are forever flashbacks

I have absolutely no fuckin clue what’s going on rn

Holy fuck joeys voice is so beautiful and his range is killing me

I take back what I said earlier this song is the best one bc joey

Holy fuck someone just hit like a high d and I have no clue who it was bc the video quality is not the greatest

JESUS THATS TERRIFYING

THE FUCK YOU MEAN DONT BE FRIGHTENED THATS MY SLEEP PARALYSIS DEMON

LOOK AT THIS FUCKER JESUS CHRIST

Wiggly is so scary because he speaks like a child and those are scary

MACNAMARA EX MACHINA

Mac: BEGONE

Prez kurt: SORRY JOHN I FUCKED IT UP

THATS THE HOOK FROM NOT YOUR SEED ISNT IT HOLY SHIT

Joeys voice and acting is gonna kill me

Yeah made in America is the shit

MAC NO U CANT DIE U DIE IN TGWDLM

Also the black and white is a dumb as shit name for an alternate reality

Prez kurt: MERRY CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKER!!!!

*wiggly voice* Uh-oh mr prezzy-wez. It seems you’ve misplaced your bomby-womb.

Well shits about to go down

I’m calling it the bomb bombed the White House

Oop no they’ve only gone and lost Moscow

Well fuck here comes ww3 I guess

And prez kurt is definitely insane in the brain

ITS THE HOOK AGAIN THE ‘ALIENS INVADING MINDS’ BIT OH MY GOD I FEEL LIKE A MUSICAL GENIUS

Jesus Sherman is a weird fuck and lex is kinda clever I guess it’s a shame we haven’t seen her for most of the musical

Lex: I THREW EM IN THE FUCKIN TRASH

LEX BABY NO DONT DIE

Lex: Is this what I live for? To be choked in a toy store?

Lexs beautiful song is this musicals version of not your seed but depression

And her voice is /pretty/

MAC?????????????

WHAT??????????????

OH MY GOD HE IS AUTHORISING HER TO USE HIS FIREARM YES QUEEN

I’m sorry lex and Hannah can do what

Jeffs voice kills me him and joey need a duet and that would be the end of me

What did lex just do in so confused

MAC DID THE SALUTE IMMA CRY YALL

And we’re back with Tom

Oh fuck lex is gonna shoot tom

Hold up Tom names his son Tim

Wiggly is playing mind tricks now yikes

Lex: KIDS DONT WANT THAT PEICE OF SHIT!!!

Tom: wat

Lex: THEYRE ALL INTO FORTNITE DUDE!!!!!

So the doll can only fuck with adults not kids???

Jesus Christ this is depressing

U wot lex

Lex: YOURE LIKE 40!!!!! YOU PROBABLY THINK YOURE LIFE IS OVER!!!!

Holy fuck this shit is deep

Wait lex still doesn’t know about Ethan oh my god

And Dylan gets another hero song holy fuck just give Robert a song already everyone else has one

At the same time though this is S a d

I’m not crying you’re crying

YES DUMBLEDORE U HIT THAT HIGH NOTE

Tom: in fact you’re real fuckin ugly

Me: yeah no shit

Lex: FUCK YEAH!!!! Should i move these boxes first?

*cue very clever scene change*

Yeah Gerald no one wants to talk to u

Oh my god Linda leave Hannah and ethans hat alone my heart is breaking for Hannah

Linda: is this some kind of a jooooke?????

They’re gonna set one of their dolls on fire ok ok ok this is fine

More villain songs ookay

If someone could tell me what the fuck is going on in this scene I’d be very impressed

Evil yoga

YES LAUREN U QUEEN

HOLY FUCK IS THAT CHARLOTTE??????

OH MY GOD ITS JAIME IN THE CHARLOTTE COSTUME IT IS CHARLOTTE HOLY SHIT

ITS CHARLOTTE AND THE HOMELESS DUDE HOLY SHIT

The choreo is...... interesting

Cue Robert not-Corey and Lauren being the only good dancers and getting special choreo

FUCK YEAH BECKY WITH THE GUN

LINDA NO

Ookay so everyone’s on fire this is fine

Emma and Paul ex machina

SOMEBODY NUKED MOSCOW!

paul is family third wheeling

YOU KNOW, SHE HAS THIS KOOKY RECLUSIVE BIOLOGY PROFESSOR

*audience fucking looses their shit*

WHO LIVES ON THE EDGE OF TOWN

Paul is having an existential crisi because he sHOULD HAVE WORN A WATCH

Someone’s gonna fall of that staircase by the end of this performance

HOLY FUCK ITS THE HOT CHOCOLATE KID

IT IS THE HOT CHOCOLATE KID OH NY GODDDDD

LOOK AT HIM

It’s the what if tomorrow comes bit!!!!!!!

Okay again this choreo is interesting but the vocals are all S t u n n i n g

They’re literally counting down until the end of the show imma loose my shit that’s the least subtle they’ve been during the entire show

Hang on hang on hang on hang on haaaaang on right there

Did lex just never find out that her boyfriend died we were deprived of a heart wrenching moment when she found out about Ethan

Like jeez I cried and I barely knew him she was dating the guy and just... didn’t ask about him????

ITS THE HOOK AGAIN

That’s it!!!!! Those were my thoughts the first time I watched this through!!!!!!!

Scream at me in the notes with any questions and I’ll try answer them :)

#tgwdlm #the guy who didn't like musicals #black friday musical #black friday starkid #black friday #wiggly #lauren lopez #robert manion #jeff blim #joey richter #digital ticket #black friday spoilers

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jungshookz · 5 years

Note

You know what would be great???? Culinary student! Jin and a hopeless y/n who eats ramen out of coffee pots and eats cool whip straight out of the can. Also ily and I hope you know that

→ pairing: kim seokjin x reader

→ genre: what a surprise it’s bratty!y/n, culinarystudent!jin and his fancy pasta, humour, a touch of nsfw because i’m obsessed with jin’s broAd shoulders it’s almost ridiculous

→ wordcount: 3.4k

→ note: i hope i did ur request justice also i love u more :~)))

(gif isn’t mine!) ((also i was going to use a gif of him actually cooking but tumblr refusEd to accept it so i’m sorry))

listen

being completely honest

jin thinks you’re really cute

like SUPER cute

like he’s really REALLy frickin attracted to you because you’re just so??? yOU and somehow it works and it gets his gears GRINDING okay

you were the one who moved in right next door and you greeted him with a friendly smile and a ‘here, i baked cookies!’ and of course he accepted the cookie because he’s not a complete monster

but good GOD

that cookie was awful

and to be fair he’s a culinary student so it makes sense that he has high standards but even a fOOL would know that your cookies were god-awful

before you got the chance to distribute your nasty cookies out to the rest of the people on your floor jin was like hEY hEY how about you give me.,.,,. all of your cookies,.,.. because i,.,. really like them.,.,., and.,., i want to eat.,.,. all of them.,., thank u., yes,.

anyways

you’ve known each other for almost eight months?

and nothing has happened because let’s be real

you’re both wussies

and no one’s admitting anything to anyone so you’re kind of in this flirty-friendly space and you’re both FULLY aware that there’s like.,.,. a sprinkle of flirting going on.,,

but you know what

that’s beside the point

he doesn’t even know why he’s thinking about his undeniable crusH on you

because right now all jin can focus on is the fact that you’re eating ramen out of a coffee pot

let him repeat himself

you’re eating ramen

out of a

a COFFEE pot

you’re in the middle of rambling to him about your day and he’s trying to pay attention to what you’re saying but he wants to scream every time to pause to sluRP out of the coffee pot

laundry room gossip is a pretty normal thing for you two

you’re both so busy during the day

you with your classes and jin with his culinary classes

so once or twice a week you’ll both coordinate a time to come down and do your laundry together (you guys usually shove all your clothes in together because u end up saving some $$ too) and you’ll both end up sitting there for a couple hours just talking to each other while waiting for your clothes

jin raises a brow before pressing his lips together

his mother raised him not to be judgemental but COME ON

RAMEN

out of a COFEE POT??????

out of all the things he’s seen you done this has to be the absolute worst

here are a couple of examples as to what monstrosities you’ve exposed him to:

a cold pizza sandwich (two slices of cold pizza with a drizzle of ranch and crunched up cheetos as the filling)

cereal eaten out of the baG ITSELF (u poured the milk in and everything)

chicken pancakes?? aka shredded deep fried chicken and shredded cheese mixed inTO pancake batter and panfried and then topped with a dollop of sour cream and a sprinkle of green onions

one time you made scrambled eggs in a mug and dat shit looked nasty

but this

this doesn’t even make sense

disrespecting what looks like a pretty high-quality coffee pot (he remembers you got it for christmas or something) by using it as a holder for $1 ramen

it’s probably going to stink up the coffee pot and every time you make coffee it’s always going to have that faint aftertaste of chicken broth

a shudder goes down his spine and he winces

you perk up when the drying machine suddenly beeps and stops rumbling “god finaLLy”

jin keeps his eyes glued on the damn coffee pot as you set it down next to your basket and go to retrieve your freshly-dried clothes

you bend down and pop open the dryer and the loud hiss makes jin look over

“jin?” he glances away quickly and looks up at the ceiling as a poor attempt to conceal the fact that he was totally just checking u out just now

“hm, what?” he clears his throat

“aren’t you going to come and get your clothes?”

“oh, right.” jin pushes himself up off the ground and grabs his basket

he props it up on his hip and starts picking out his clothes from the pile

“hey, these are cute.” jin can’t help but smirk as he twirls a burgundy thong around his finger

your cheeks flame up immediately

“cut it out, you perv” you scowl playfully and grab it from him quickly

the little voice in the back of your mind can’t help but wonder if perhaps jin would be interested in seeing you wear the thong

it comes with a matching bralette

“ya-“ jin pokes your arm and you look over at him “was that your dinner?” he points to the coffee pot and you glance over at it “didn’t you have ramen yesterday?”

“…yeah. instant ramen has been my dinner every day for the past week. why?” you hum nonchalantly and continue picking through the pile

you help jin out and toss one of his white t-shirts into his basket

jin can’t help but let his jaw drop

you’ve been eating processed garBAGe for the past weEK

how???????????

“it’s never enough for me tho so i usually eat a bag of chips too. i might have a frozen mac n’ cheese thingy in the freezer so that’s an option too.” you gasp excitedly “ooh i can crumble the chips over the mac n’ chee-“

“oh my god.” all of a sudden jin reaches over and puShes the rest of the clothes into his basket before grabbing your wrist and dragging you towards the door

“hey, we haven’t finished sorting out the-“

“we’ll do it later i just need to get some actual foOD into your system before all the MSG and sodium starts breakING down your internal organs”

as he’s dragging you up the stairs (the elevator is broken again what a surprise) you can’t help but admire how b r o a d his shoulders are

the cotton shirt he’s wearing is kinda thin and u swear u can see his back muscles flexing slightly

you can’t help but wonder what it’d feel like

running your hands all along his back

digging your nails into his shoulders as he,.,,., y’know

wrapping your legs around his tapered waist as he.,,.,.,. y’knOW

s i g h

you purposely pull back a little so jin slows down and gives u more time to ogle him

are you a pervert for doing that

you might be

“let me see what’s in your fridge so i can work my magic”

he’s never actually been in your apartment before

well

he’s never had a reaSon to

(you always wanna invite him in to watch a movie or something but u get shy and shrivel up immediately)

he has a good idea of the layout because his place is exactly the same as yours

he’s not surprised to see that your place is relatively neat and organised besides a couple scattered markers on the coffee table and a throw blanket tossed haphazardly over the couch

there’s a candle burning away in the middle of the coffee table that makes your place smell like warm vanilla

but then

he enters the war zone

the kitchen

oh my god

this is a living nightmare

this is HIS living nightmare

there’s just

he sees all the takeout boxes in the bin and the pizza box sitting on your kitchen island and the- well that must’ve been your breakfast or something because you sprinkled cinnamon toast crunch on a bagel smeared with waY too much cream cheese

“oh hey i forgot about this” a piece of jin’s soul dies and floats up to heaven when you pop the rest of your cinnamon-cream-cheese-bagel monstrosity into your mouth and chew thoughtfully

why does he like you

“ah, i probably should’ve offered you a bite… i’ll make one for you tomorrow if you want!”

whY DOES HE LIKE U

“i’m… good. i think i’m more than good.” he shudders before nudging past you heading to your fridge “lemme see what we’re working with here…”

“you know you really don’t have to make anything for me. i told you i had a frozen mac and cheese…” you’re rambling and jin is most certainly not paying attention to you mainly because he’s shocked becAUSE you have like NOTHING in your fridge

a bottle of three-cheese ranch

a couple oranges, an avocado, and one red apple

a half-eaten sandwich?? it looks like turkey and a shitload of mayo

a takeout box with…,,. three pieces of orange chicken and a piece of broccoli that you’ve taken a bite out of

a baby carton of chocolate milk and a regular sized carton of milk

and a can of cool whip

unless he makes an orange-chicken-turkey-avocado sandwich with ranch on the side accompanied with a glass of chocolate milk with a dollop of whipped cream on top there’s not a lot he can do here

is thiS how you live

“you know what, maybe you should just come over to my place!” jin closes the fridge and clasps his hands together “yeah, let’s do that.”

“what do you mean?? i have plenTy of food in my fridg- okAy” you stumble over your feet when jin grabs your wrist and drags you away from the fridge

when you enter jin’s place he pushes you down on the couch and you nearly bounce off of it “you stay here, and i’ll whip something up for us.”

as he turns to head towards his kitchen he hears a vioLent schrrr

he turns back around and your finger freezes on the nozzle on the whipped cream canister

“wha- where did you even hiDe that” jin furrows his brows and you shrug before squirting some more into your mouth

“you sure you don’t need any help??” you’re already bored and you’ve only been here for less than a minute

“i don’t want you burning down my kitchen, so i’m good.”

“but i’m boRed and i’m hunGRY” you whine and flop back against the couch

jin raises a brow before bending down and grabbing the remote

he turns the tv on and it just so happens to be playing the late-night cartoons

perfect for a petulant child like you

miraculously jin gets 20 minutes of peace and quiet until he hears you whining again about how hunGry again

that’s what happens when you eat nothing but empty calorie foods

your eyes light up with excitement when jin emerges from the kitchen

he has a rag tossed over his shoulder and a grey apron hanging around him that you assume is from his culinary school

his cheeks are kinda pink from the heat of the kitchen which is adorable

he sits down next to you and you turn to fully face him while crossing your legs

he hands you the plate

wow

“….do you go to culinary school or something?” you tease and jin snorts

the pasta’s been plated into a loose nest and there’s a pretty little basil leaf sitting on top

“chicken, bacon, and spinach spaghetti. and since you’re a whipped cream freak we can have assorted berries and whipped cream for dessert.”

“assorted berries.” you mock quietly and jin scowls playfully before handing you a fork

he doesn’t know why but he’s a little bit nervous lol

like he KNOWS he’s good at cooking but for some reason he feels like he’s presenting a dish to gordon ramsay or someone of that calibre

you twirl a bit of pasta around the fork and shove it into your mouth

and you didn’t think it was possible

but you’re pretty sure your mouth is having an orgasm

HOLy shit

fireworks are going OFF

the bacon has retained its crisp

the spinach is wilted but not toO wilted that it’s falling apart

the chicken is so soft and tender

the spaghetti is cooked *ahem* al dente

and the sauce!!!!

it’s so creamy

so flavourful

you swallow your bite and blink down at the plate of pasta

“what’s wrong?”

“this is…. almost too good.” you mutter and poke at a piece of perfectly cooked chicken before stabbing into it and popping it into your mouth

jin’s cheeks warm with pride as he watches you continue to eat

“it’s almost as good as my frozen mac n cheese meals.” you joke and jin resists the urge to smack you with his rag

it doesn’t matter if you’ve eaten 20 pounds of food for dinner because you’ll always aLWAys have room for dessert

especially if dessert involves whipped cream

it’s healthy-ish!! it’s basically dairy and don’t u need dairy for strong bones or something

and strawberries and blueberries are fruit

and fruit is healthy

so if you really think about it assorted berries and whipped cream is the ideal combo if u wanna get in shape

jin doesn’t trust you with the canister of whipped cream (because he’s 100% sure you’re just going to hog all the cream and squirt all of it into your mouth) so he’s squirting some out onto a particularly juicy looking strawberry that he knoWS you want to devour

he turns and offers it to you and your mouth opens automatically as you lean forward to take it into your mouth

“hold on now.” your brows immediately knit together when he pulls away juSt as you’re about to take a bite “admit it. my spaghetti is much better than your stupid mac n cheese meals.” there’s a glint of playfulness in his eyes as he points to his ear and waits for your response

“i dunno. i get the mac n cheese from whole foods so you know it’s good.” you tsk but keep your eyes right on the berry hovering in front of you

“huh. i guess i’ll be enjoying this seasonal japanese strawberry for myself, then.” jin pouts mockingly

“nO i WANT IT“ jin yelps when you’re suddenly clambering over and grabbing his wrist so that you can shoVe the berry right into your mouth

now

a normal person would eat the berry and then return to their seat

unsurprisingly

you are far from a normal person

you keep your hold on his wrist and suck the whipped cream off his thumb after swallowing the strawberry

god have mercy

your eyes flicker up and you see jin staring right at you with parted lips

“…something the matter?”

and within one second

the berries and your trusty canister of whipped cream have both been abandoned in favour for

well

“can’t believe it took you thiS long to make a move” you murmur against jin’s mouth and he responds by nipping at your bottom lip

“says you!” he gawks before proceeding to press kisses down your neck

and you finALLY get to feel his muscles rippLe underneath the soft cotton of his shirt as you slide your hands from his waist to his back

meanwhile jin’s hand has found its home in between your legs and your eyes flutter shut “god, jin…”

“something the matter?” he mocks before pressing a chaste kiss to your mouth “you gonna admit it now?”

“admit wha- oh, jin - admit whaT”

“that my food is better than your frozen TV dinners” you would’ve burst out laughing if it weren’t for the shocks of electricity tingling up your spine

“n-no way-“ your back arches against his chest and your mouth falls open in a silent moan

and suddenly

you let out a pathetic whine when jin’s hand pulls away from in between your legs “fine. i guess we’re done here!” he sits up but keeps your legs wrapped around his waist

god

you are just a vision aren’t you

you’re flopped back against the arm of the couch

your chest is heaving slightly

your cheeks and nice n rosy

“you are the absolute worst.”

“c’mon… say it…” he hums and slides a finger from your knee cap to your inner thigh

you know for a fact you two aren’t done here because jin’s already hooked a finger into the waistband of your shorts but you’re naturally a veRy impatient person and so-

“fine, you idiot. your food is significantly better than my frozen TV dinners. happy?”

“…i’ll take it.”

((spoiler alert: you are rewarded with not one not two but thREE mind-blowing orgasms for admitting it))

((maybe you should learn to be less stubborn))

“good morning!” jin is startled awake when you plop on top of him with your legs on either side of him “it’s 10 o’clock and i made us some food”

“christ, don’t scare me like that!” jin scolds you playfully and reaches up to pinch the side of your bare thigh

you’re wearing the shirt he had on last night and it’s starting to droop off your shoulder

“good morning indeed.” his voice is thick with sleep and his hand slides up from your thigh to grasp at your waist “whatcha got there?”

“cinnamon toast crunch bagel” you murmur with a mouthful of bagel and swipe at a lil chunk of cream cheese on the corner of your mouth “my wonderful creation that i made fresh for you”

you’re getting crumbs all over jin but he can’t seem to care because the idea of a cinnamon toast crunch bagel makes him want to throW YOU ouT THE WINDOW

he sits up slowly and wraps an arm around your waist before nuzzling into the crook of your neck “you’re lucky i like you otherwise i would throw your wonderful creation righT into the garbage bin right about now.”

you scoff in mock offence and pull away from him before jabbing a sticky finger into his bare (b r o a d) chest

“don’t knock it til you try it!!”

“the day i try one of your inventions is the day i- mmph!” you shut him up and shove the last bite of your bagel into his mouth before clasping your hand over his mouth so he can’t spit it out

jin chews slowly

and swallows

what the hell

that actually..,,. that tasted good

“that was okay, i suppose. kinda sweet. but i can think of something that might taste a little sweeter.” before you know it jin is flipPing you over and you find yourself pinned underneath him

you’re a giggling mess because you’re trying to get the cream cheese and sugar particles off your fingers but jin is being very vEry distracting

“hOLd on a second sir i have breakfast waiting for us in the living room!” jin’s already made his way down your chest and is about to set up shop in between your legs

he looks up at you before offering you a cheeky grin “…i’m in the mood for breakfast in bed, aren’t you?”

help me help you make your wishes come tru (aka send me a request)

masterlist

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dragaoel · 5 years

Text

Jun'ichirō, aka Jun (- Silverdell)

the volume of the radio slowly dwindles down and only static noise is left to be heard

"those are dangerous words"

"not for him " Anja replies, her head laying on her outstretched arm that's on the table , her whole posture the embodiment of laziness. "loved ones always have it easier here"

"Not always" Jun says grimly and glances out of the window" it's because he's an outsider that he's allowed more freedom than any of us"

"aren't you a loved one too?"

Jun sighs deeply and turns towards the albino girl. For a second ,pain , frustration and a hint of panic can be seen in his eyes before it vanishes. He lets out a bitter laugh.

"and you saw where that lead me to,half dead in a ditch"

INTRODUCTION JUN :

half japanese half black

has waist long black thick hair and brown skin

has a ‘’prince in anguish’’ aura but masks it with him being over the top ridiculous and dramatic

is 5′11

born 12th october (libra)

‘‘the risk i took was calculated, but man, am i bad at math’‘

Jun is my favourite character, i made him on a whim as a side character in a old story and then i started using him more and more as a background character until i realized the potential he had. He's also one of the character whom i put into a lot of different aus, the most favourite one was where he was a vampire who loved laying in the garden and eat roses all day

Rukiya (-Though the god’s have left)

‘‘i have dreams about them’‘ Rukiya says and plucks a string on her bass. The deep note rumbles through the room and her short curls moves along as she drops her head lower

‘‘i'm high in the sky, looking down onto a land that seems oh so familiar, with people screaming at me asking me to help them’‘

‘’do you understand them? ‘’ a band member asks

‘‘weirdly i do’‘ Rukiya answers ‘‘ it seems to be in my native language but also not, as if it was way before everything happened, you know, the ancient time’‘

INTRODUCTION RUKIYA :

Out of the both of them Rukiya is the older twin by 4 minutes

she’s also the artsy one than her sister whos into sports

wears black literally 24/7 and has dark circles despite sleeping enough

is 5′9

is black (kenyan)

mole on the left side of her cheek

fluent in her native tongue kiswahili

Majors in Film

loves anything that has to do with space nd aliens

born 24th january (aquarius)

has a sweet tooth

*cocks gun* ‘’basements haunted’’

i like the idea of twins that are completely the opposite of each other. Rukiya just like Imara have a big chunk of my personality in them, it's just that i lean more towards Rukiya than Imara.

Akiho (-Though the god’s have left)

Kneeling down, she cocks her head to the side, her eyes cold and her lips pressed into a thin line ‘’ dont think your actions won't have consequences’’ she sneers ‘’ the next time i see you harassing another girl again i'll make you wish you were never born’’

Akiho dusts herself , picks up the bat , glances one last time at the boy laying on the floor and walks away, the echoes of her shoes the only noise to be heard

INTRODUCTION AKIHO :

is 5′4

majors in theater

her fashion style is y2k

is the other one of the dumbass duo

has freckles on her nose

is japanese

doesn't like sweet things usually eats traditional sweets made by her mom or things that are sour/bitter, but salty food has to be spicy asf

born, 14th april (aries)

her side teeth are really pointy

has long peach colored straight hair

‘‘I’d sell you to satan for one corn chip’‘

Akiho comes from a family of 3, she's the youngest sibling and she has that energy. She likes to play with her oldest brother children, doesn't want any on her own though. will fight anyone who is disrespectful, esp towards women

Hyunjin (-Though the god’s have left)

The tall girl slumps her body onto her girlfriend shoulder, watching her fry the fish in the pan into charcoal. Hyunjin wrinkles her nose in a attempt to push the glasses up without having to actually touch them, before she sighs deeply.

‘‘Just-’‘ she starts and softly takes ‘‘let me do it, otherwise you'll burn the kitchen down like last time’‘

Praveena puffs her cheeks up ‘’that actually wasn't my fault, it was the gasherd-’’

‘‘i know i know’‘ Hyunjin chuckles and kisses her cheek ‘‘but i have a exam tomorrow and i would like not not have an indigestion’‘ she frowns and flips the fish over and sighs. It seems the fish can’t be saved anymore.

INTRODUCTION HYUNJIN :

korean

has short dyed blue hair, but the back part is longer than the front part.

is ‘5′10

majors in engineering technology

born 14th may (taurus)

has literally no sense of style and wears glasses cause she has a slight astigmatism that you can't really see

has a mole next to her right eye

‘‘a financially unstable mess but at the liquor store they call me ma’am’‘

honestly out of all the characters i draw hyunjin the most. In the beginning she had shoulder length but then i shortened it because i liked it more. She's an only child and her mother runs a bakery while her father works in a office. She's the calm type that's constantly tired because she never sleeps

Praveena (-Though the god’s have left)

She shuffles the cards and lays them out on the table. The customers sees the fool, the moon and the star. Praveena touches them with her fingertips ‘’ you seem to be either at the beginning or at the end of a new journey ’’ she pauses and thinks ‘’but either way you're prepared for what is to come’’

The customers nods ‘’i'm soon moving away from this city’’

‘‘I see’‘ Praveena counters and points at the next card ‘‘the moon indicates that you’re hesitant and fearful in your decision, there might be something from the past that is holding you back and influencing you in the present and possibly the future

the customer tenses up, her eyes fixed on the card and her lips tight

‘‘though’‘ Praveena continues ‘‘at the end you’ll be at peace and glad that you pushed through all the turbulences

INTRODUCTION PRAVEENA :

tamil ,dark skin with long wavy violet dyed hair

Hyunjin’s girlfriend

has calm energy but is also very erratic

loves astrology & tarot

majors in psychology

5′5

born 20 july (cancer)

has droopy eyes

‘‘god cant help you now’‘

i made praveena cause i wanted a harmonious wlw couple, that have that ‘’old married pair’’ plus out of all the ocs those two are the ones that i drew first. Praveena has the tendency to blow things up how though is a mystery and hyunjin always has to clean up everything.

Imara (-Though the god’s have left)

‘‘no listen, it doesn't make sense why would you wear a bra and some tight ass pants knowing you’re about to fight people who have knives and GUNS?’’ Imara asks perturbed.

‘‘Cause men are horny’‘ Rukiya retorts and raises an eyebrow

‘‘still doesn't make sense like wow!, some fucking boobs, like really? really? is that what gets you going? just some breast pressed up in a bra that is too damn tight and a flat stomach on a skinny ass girl that has absolute no muscles despite the training she went through?

Rukiya sighs ‘’ is this about-’’

‘‘lara croft yes’‘ Imara interrupts and slams her finger on the table ‘‘and im going to die on this hill that men shouldn't be allowed to create games!’‘

INTRODUCTION IMARA:

plays games a lot, esp the loz series

has curly dyed blonde hair that's mostly tied in a ponytail or a bun because she cant be bothered with it, though rukiya helps her all the time cause she never really learned how to deal with curly hair.

Is on a baseball sponsorship because she's that good (she's a pitcher)

is totally tone deaf unlike her twin

isnt good with crows ie: strangers crowding around her after her team won a game

is kenyan

5′9

has a mole next to her upper lips on the left side

loves 90's rnb & hip hop music

‘‘he proclaimed his undying love and asked me to do the same, i had to overcome my desire to laugh��‘

Imara does have a slight complex about being a twin because she feels like Rukiya is the cooler one despite people loving her too. She's loud and boisterous basically a chad, but better. She's dorky and literally spends her free time gaming but she doesn't just play any game shes v specific when it comes to that. Her mom always has a headache because of her but thats okay but in the end her mom loves her to death.

Ava (-Though the god’s have left)

‘’do you you know how much it's sucks that at the end of all of this , i'm the one waiting for them?’’ Ava exclaims ‘’that i'm the one who will have to watch them go through the door to be evaluated? that i'm ultimately the end?

‘‘you’re not all alone-’‘

‘‘you don't understand’’ Ava interrupts, as she points at the short girl ‘’ i will have to watch my mom, my family that raised me go through that door and know that that will be the last time i will see them in that body!’’

INTRODUCTION AVA:

She’s haitian

keeps her hair in a short chin length dark blue bob

majors in sociology

she and akiho are the ‘’comedy duo’’ of the group

is 5′6

born 4th november (scorpio)

‘‘my only crime was that i was down to clown’‘

When i make akiho i felt like she needed a companion so i made ava, both of them were inspired by the early 2000 shows characters. Although Ava likes to goof around she's also very studious and serious about her future. She comes from a family of 6 and she’s the second oldest. She and her older sister fight constantly

Nïrnaya (Dawn over the horizon)

‘‘Magic’‘ the elf stars, her tall stature hunched over the herbs ‘’ is in the nature we’re surrounded in, in the mountains that stand high and the rivers that flow into the deep sea’’

she straightens up and walks over to Nïrnaya ‘’ we might lose everything.’’ She pokes the girl on the forehead ‘’but magic will forever stay with you because its the core of your being‘’

INTRODUCTION NÏRNAYA :

shes a mischievous 15 year old

has black curly long hair that are mostly braided

does not want to do this whole adventure thing because of how it reminds her too much of the ‘’chosen one trope’’ and thats too much responsibilities

born during the year of the earth dragon

‘‘snacking between meals is the least, but tastiest, of my problems’‘

i came up with this story and character because i wanted a book where a black girl for once was the main character, where she could experience the same thing as other mc (ie eragon etc) basically i wanted black representation in a medieval-esque world but with my own spin because the world itself is not very western like

#writeblr #character introduction #original character #writer #hua's word #writers on tumblr #writeblr community #character intro post #oc moodboard

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highrankingdemoness · 5 years

Text

what do you call someone with a strong annoyance borderline hate of men specifically men who are incredibly (masculine) toxic but would be the shit out of anyone who tried to say a man could be assaulted, or that men should be belittled and mistreated like women?( a rant?)

I remember I got called a terf like maybe two or three months ago and it bothers me because I worry if I could be aligned in that horrible theory. I always thought the main core of terfism was that you are “ gender critical “ and you ironically just like the patriarchy don't think a woman could ever be smart enough to know the difference in literally - anything? i like trans woman too many folks...i like women - cis and trans...they're cute and awesome ...so like how could you not? Im bringing this up because as of late ive had a very angry and almost cold voice that respond when i see violence against women because people felt entitle to people bodies and just like school shootings and trumps camps I have to numb myself too it or otherwise i would literally go on a suicidal/homicidal spree. “ a women’s death is nothing in comparison to a man’s freedom. a woman;s discomfort is nothing in the way of a man entitlement “ I dont like that phrase. i feel like if come off to me as the epitome of femi nzai if that’s even a thing anymore since the men who hated them are most likely real nazis. Listen im 28 and stuck in a house with two men who double-crossed me and are only taking care of me because i decided to quit my job. im only in this house with someone who i thought was literally going to harm and someone who stolen moeny from me becuase as a soceity i have been mold to bend until i break and be gaslighted as “ an irrational fuhmal” not even human if i bring it up. its 2019 and im still tlaking to people who think its ok to count thier two stay at home mothers as an example of why women get paid less because they work less but tell em that the 50 women i work with at a company dont count becuase that’s my just my feelings and smirk and bring up “ toxic feminity” like that not a sub division of toxic masculinity - Because women DID NOT tell other women to compete with other women in order to get men Because women DID NOT teach other women that it’s ok to hit men and that men shouldn't cry Because other women DID NOT teach other women that men couldn't be raped, should always pay the bill Not in the beginning ...that was toxic masculinity but how dare I expect men to accountability for responsibility - that’s just one of the privileges of being a male. and stop telling women when they get hurt by a man that they should of got a guy form thier family. You mean the same guy who was allowed to walk around in thier underwear while i had to fully dress in my home at 9 years of fucking age because my body attracted raped and his didn't or as i like to say it “ boys will be boys but girls should know better by knowing nothing at all”

Listen I don't think the world would be better if men didn't exist. I don't think the world would be better if men were put under the social pressure of women . Im just dont exist in this society any more as hetero passing individual because i dont get along with it’s morals. im so fucking tired of watching women dying because “ a man has his needs...and his excuses “ and before the misandry parade comes put the cuffs again - i dont mind being a misandrist as much as i don't want to be a terf but again im not looking to get in fights with men. I honestly wish i was invisible to them since seeing me as anything as a female is so socially ingrained is impossible and understanding - im not even mad. make go back in the kitchen jokes, shit on my existence, make me play this doll for the sake of your “ cool girl because if i dont letyou hug me, if i show even a sign of resistance to your sexual banter or your anti feminist logic or your victim-shaming statements...im no longer an object of convenience...and i potentially become a another death statistics and to the “ protect the boys” brigade aka the people who come screaming from/the corner of this hellsite like someone told your child santa doesn't exist when a woman says something like “ you know i like getting dress up for other women I try not to think about men “ “ im not here for emotionally unavalible boys” “ I'm not here for men who don't want to fix themselves” ” I'm not worried about children and men “ ” I didn't find him interesting so i didn't give him a chance ” and then you mofos come of the fucking woodwork screaming like a motherfucking banshee ” BOYS NEED LOVE ! IF YOU DONT WANNA FiX HIm HOW IS HE GOING TO GROW ?!” ” DONT SAY MEN ARE TRASH ! TOXIC MASCULINITY IS A RESULT OF HIM NOT BEING LOVE PROPERLY !” ” IGNORE THEM BOYS WE WONT LET THEM FORGET YOU “ * animal like screeching To you ; you dont care about men. You care about the status quo. You think if men become “ as emotional as fuhmales “ (because half of you don't see women as anything but her genitals ) that they will break down. you don't want men to make a connection between the idea that men need to sex in order to be valuable even if that means taking it and that anyone who take sex is a rapist because then men would have to be accountable for their actions. They would feel bad and you wouldn't want your favorite child to feel bad, after all if they feel bad they cant let loose and be the “ best version” of themselves- even if that version of themselves is a fucking dumpster fire. You want them to be the full end of this spectrum at the expense of your less favorite child ( women ). You might be someone who just, in general, have fed into the bullshit that woman are liars ( another concept that makes it easier for rape culture to be prevalent and strong ) and that men are calm, collective beings who are being neglected thanks to feminism and woman not focusing on them. you might think “ well logically if you only tell men they're trash they're going to be trash “ Ive been told i was a bitch , a fake, a slob( that is true. i am dirty af and i will not put on deordorant unless someone coming), pathetic and useless. I decide one day that if i didnt like any of those things i would change it , becuase if i didnt like being those things that i needed to change them for me. I CHANGE WHEN I DIDNT LIKE MYSELF and before anyone says anything i have had depression and anxeity. i have been gaslighted and bully for years but at the end of the day my change didi not come from people cheering me up or tearing me down it came from ME being critical of myself nad my actions. And that’s why you “ what about the boys” people dont love men as much as you say you do . You're so afraid of them becoming something more than your baby boy being more than what you want, greater than what society has allow that you would rather make in a pacified monster than a human being. you guys hate men and i cannot stand any of you to the young man who has been discriminated against because you weren't born as a cis male were raped by women and wasn't respected by either woman or men when you look for support gritted your teeth and read through all my rambling you're valid. you worried about having your whole life ruined by false rape accusations or in general, you are generally afraid of adding to a woman’s concern when it comes to men. you dont like being around certain woman becuase you feel they are too touchy are they are the one who the moment you dont find them attractive and everyone includes other men invalidate you're right to not want to be touch. you fucking have to control your urge to gut punch every time you here the phrase “ men are trash “ becuase you understand the phrase isnt about you and some smart ass is like “ if its not about you why are you getting mad “. Like we all know why you're mad - but we know you're better than that. I appreciate you questioning your friends on thier used of rape jokes and trying to implied that sexual assault doesn't exist becuase “ if the guy attracted females dont complain “ I think you're wonderful...but i want out becuase my death is just another occurrence. being someone’s property as a child, wife or even friend means nothing now. my death is nothing different than throwing out an aluminum can. i no longer wonder if the person im talking to is capable of rape. i know longer wonder if ill makes it home safely. i know get angry about wanting to do things like move out on my own, be respected by men and not feel that my feelings are constantly being pacified like a battery operated doll who the owner is cooing to work. I expect it. and when it doesn't happen i hold my breath and try to not think about tomorrow where ill pretty much have the bar set that low again. I expected to have my feelings band aid with “ well im sorry someone hurt you “ or “ youre apart of the problem thinking like that”. when something im uncomfortable with happens i dont go out in a rage but belitting my feelings as “ sensitive” or “ stop being a bitch “ roll off me. Humankind is capable of amazing thing and i know change is possible...but i dont expect it anytime soon. ....I really just want out. its 2019 and women are still getting killed becuase of entitlement and the only ing most of you is complain that it happens to men too.....Im tired of pretending this society cares if i was murder right now. you only careif i fit the commodity of the day...I want out for i am so very tired

#suicide mention #sucide trigger #homicide mention #homicide trigger #sexism #toxic masculinity #heteronormative society #cursing

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