#and now both of those have come back with a vengeance and tbh im having a great time

[deadangelos-fanblog]

Mun Updates WOOOO

HELLO I LIVE

If you haven’t seen already, by the time this posts the annual pjo pride art should be up over at @deadangelos. Very very fun. Got some new faces: Piper and Shel have been added to the lineup. Apollo is also no longer human. Magnus is distressed yet again, as is tradition at this point. 3/4 of the annual canonical PJO Pride Art features Magnus being distressed. Will this year is sparing everyone of the socks and sandals outfit, though I absolutely intend to continue tormenting everyone with that. Piper i have become incapable of drawing without DIY jorts, because let’s be real that’s exactly her vibes. Also I can never draw Lavinia without giving her pride color hair because the opportunity is there and I find it fun. Also Alex has heelys because I Said So.

The art is a bit fashionably late into the month but in my defense: My sleep schedule is, as the kids say, bad. I’m typing this at about 5am. Whoops.

I was very strongly considering including Reyna in this year’s pride art and only didn’t because she’s technically only aspec-coded, not canonically ace, and I try to keep the lineup of the pride art to the canonically queer major characters in the series and their partners if applicable. This is entirely just cause there’s a good number of canonically queer PJO characters and I already have to draw 12 annually. Drawing like, half of CHB would hurt me. I do really wanna at least doodle some ace pride art of Reyna though cause I adore her and also of course getting to draw one of my pride flags :Dc

Misc blog things: Grace Event will be returning soon!!! I swear!!! The blog’s not dead!!! I have a really long complicated plot that i’ve had planned out for like a year that covers events literally into Tower Of Nero and beyond so, yknow. Not just gonna drop that ball. Might start posting more here, especially with some fun little tid-bits about OCs and stuff on the blog and probably just general ramblings and research I do for writing and design. If yall ever have any questions or want to know about the random minute obsessive detail I put into things, the inbox for this blog is always open. There are also multiple mods so you may hear some input from them sometimes as well.

Mun Updates: Starting therapy tomorrow, very very cool. Also been figuring out how to use Adobe Premire and made a couple animatics and other silly videos. And bought Clip Studio Paint, so I will probably be messing around with that a ton. I am so very very tempted to make a Deadangelos animatic or two. Very tempted. insert eyes emoji here.

- Sincerely, Mun

#mun posts #deadangelos #i say ''annual canonical pjo pride art'' cause the first pjo pride art i did included aro/ace leo which is a hc of mine #and also deadangelos canon but i must differenciate the canon-compliant pride art with my own headcanon #also the discord is still a thing that exists. woot woot. #is pjo fandom dead i havent been on tiktok or instagram and im p sure thats the only place folks are still alive #ive been living in my quiet corner of tumblr and also dsmptwt which is An Experience #i dont know what happens on the Tok or the Gram these days. i feel old. #the aforementioned animatics ive been working on have been the blockgame rp of course #i hyperfixated on minecraft in like 2011 while also being super into roleplaying #and now both of those have come back with a vengeance and tbh im having a great time #but yeah feel free to shoot ooc asks here cause im itching to infodump about random details and ocs

[tfw-no-tennis]

hxh movie....2!

ruth and i watched the second hxh movie and that certainly was a movie

the title is already cracking me up lmao ‘the last mission’ THATS SO DRAMATIC. 

the first like 3 scenes feel totally disconnected like theyre from different movies vnjskdfnsdkflk

‘many decades ago’ vbhjdsfbajsdf that phrasing is hilarious somehow 

damn young netero just killed jeb bush 

ah look its our movie villains, starting their villain stuff

so i guess this is set around where we are in the series now - like, somewhere in this beginning part of the chimera ant arc where gon and killua are hanging w/kite. which is kinda funny bc they dont explain AT ALL how and why gon and killua are in this city suddenly hvbajdsfjskdjan

killua skateboarding makes me smile :’) love it 

IS THAT ZUSHI??????? AHHHHHHH MY BOY!!!!!!!!!! BABY BOY!!!!!!!!!!! LOOK AT HIMMMM HES A LIL BUFF 7 YR OLD NOW OUGHHHH HES GROWN SO MUCH...POWERFUL BABY....IM SO PROUD 

omg wing and bisky are here too!!! nen fam 

im so proud of zushi being a floor master omg....i love how the side characters progress and grow offscreen, separate of the protags, kinda like seeing pokkle again (rip tho, i think) 

LEORIOOOOO MY MAN!!!!!!! he really showed up for like 3 seconds then gets KOd and dumped in a sewer....STOP DOING MY MAN SO DIRTY GIVE HIM SCREENTIME..

ohhh so we’re doing anime die hard. kinda like the first macadamia movie 

that lady rlly just stabbed herself huh.

these antags look like theyre from naruto. main antag dude looks like about 7 different anime guys fused 

oh man netero got dunked on immediately Ls. gotta take him out so the protags can do the fighting 

gon and killua are so good. and also in love. epic 12 yr old romance 

KURAPIKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lookin sharp in a suit. also just looking depressed as hell in general. KURAPIKA ARE YOU...GOOD....ARE YOU STAYING HYDRATED??? TAKING UR VITAMINS?? I DONT THINK YOU ARE. 

also i still cant believe kp is working for neon still...it rlly feels like they just gave up on life and just figured that staying there was fine or w/e

now the 3 protags are goin full die hard thru the tower...WHERE is leorio i cant believe they rlly threw my mans in a sewer like that smh 

these guys r rlly called ‘the shadow’ thats so edgy 

also i watched this like a few hours ago but im a dumb bitch so im reading thru the wiki article for the movie to remind me what happened, and apparently The Shadow(tm) was the black ops division of the hunter association, and they were later rekkt once they started w/the On...i so didnt get that while actually watching the movie vhdakjfhbskdfn thanks hunterpedia for explaining that one to me 

wooowww so the HA rlly just committed massive, morally reprehensible war crimes and then just sealed it all in a book or st and moved on. yikes id be mad too, generic anime dude villain 

so these three rlly just resurrected a dude by going into the desert and saying ‘hey we r emo can you give us some power and maybe anime jeb bush’ and that Worked 

now kurapika is fighting the dude in the control room and gon&killua are fighting Big Dude WHO BEAT UP ZUSHI!!!!!!!!! get his ass boys 

LEORIOOOOOO MMY MAN IS BACK FROM HIS SEWER ADVENTURE!!!!!!!!! ILY SIRRRRR 

and then he immediately gets yoinked by hisoka, who is for some reason in this movie. i feel like they were like oh yeah hisoka is like, the 5th main character/antagonistic force of the story so i guess he should be here. its hilarious tho bc he spends 90% of his already limited screentime in this movie just playing w/his playing cards and smirking. bastard man you just gooo awayyyyy

seeing beans again omggggg green dude u r great

also who the FUCK is that smarmy looking blonde at the HA HQ...i hate him already based on 1) his atrocious pattern-clashing fashion sense, and 2) his smarmy aura. he looks like hes never thought a thought in his life. ruth says he might be buddies w/ging which makes me hate him even more 

gon and killua....r dating. ty 

when gon and the bad guy start fighting in the elevator shaft and killua just kinda watches hvbajddfhbsjf hes like ‘oh the narrative demands that gon fights solo for a bit so i guess ill stay here’ lmao 

but then he saves gon with his physics-heavy electromagnet elevator clamp plan....smart baby 

then after they defeat the guy they just start chatting lol i love them 

ohhh shit the guy exploded, thats fucked up 

poor gon :( more trauma for the poor kid 

meanwhile kurapika fights an evil clone of themself. wow 

tbh kurapika could totally one-up these guys by being like ‘well ok at least you have each other, im the VERY LAST kurta’ 

its strange to see kurapika fighting w/the sticks instead of the chains tbh

WHO THREW THAT KNIFE AT THE GUY IT HAS TO BE LEORIO HHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

LEORIO AND KURAPIKA REUNION HHHHH THEYYYYY

they are married tyvm 

kurapika is soooo not doin well like...please get some rest

kurapika referring to their ‘new friends’ hmmmm thats probably an actual canon reference since this doesnt get brought up again in the movie. probs referring to w/e kp is doing in canon at this point 

LEORIO USING NEN LMAOOO hes like pshhhh that was easy but internally hes like owww....sir ily sm 

damn kurapika rlly stabbed that guy w/a stick huh. rip dude 

ohhh shit its those drug capsule things 

KURAPIKA RLLY TOOK A BULLET FOR LEORIO HUH. I HATE IT HEREEEEEE

leorio best dude

wow so kp has to make an On covenant OR DIE...yeah i think theyll choose the die option 

squad reunion :’) even tho kp is like, dying 

gon is such a good boy :( ily baby 

leorio and kurapika are str8 up married ty 

final battle timeee

love how at this point in the story gon only has one attack so he has no choice but to keep doing that same attack (well, the 3 variations) over and over til st happens lmao 

lmao gon and kurapika are rlly on the opposite ends of the ‘On’ scale here w/kp willing to die rather than accept using On, and gon seeking out On for POWER and also VENGEANCE 

the themes of gon’s righteous anger on behalf of others continues...

the boys are rlly getting tossed around a lot this movie geez 

hh boy gon is now...PURPLE-BLUE 

oooh killua convincing the lady to chill out was cool - tho ngl i didnt realize she was still alive 

now netero can go ham. i wonder if he’ll finish the fight or if gon will 

uh oh gon is Extra Feral now 

gon: IM EVIL NOW

killua: NOT ON MY FUCKING WATCH 

oughhh they love each other so much bro. fuck this 

gon banging his head on the ground and then killua jumping in between him and the ground....true love bro 

gon snapped out of it WITH THE POWER OF LOVE!!!!!!!!!! im emo and gay. thanks 

love how even when netero was younger he was still like, an old guy lmao 

and then the next day theyre all just back in heavans arena hbvhdahdfbjsakf who cares that the building just got hijacked? whatevs 

kurapika smiling a little and melody then smiling knowingly....melody is like Bitch I Know Youre In Love 

still kurapika seems like. not Right. pls get some therepy 

im glad zushi got to fight that guy like he was supposed to....and w/the nen fam cheering him on :’) 

THOUGHTS

its wild how they didnt really delve into the whole ‘war crimes’ thing w/the hunter association lmao. idk if this movie is canon so that might be why....they just brushed over the fact that the HA was like, running concentration camps and murdering entire groups of people. wild 

this movie was fun!! it felt more like hxh than the last movie, which v much felt like a generic anime movie. this one felt more in character. it did fall into typical anime movie tropes sometimes but the characters felt more like themselves here, espec w/the point of the story this seems to be set at 

like gons anger and all that - while it obvs comes from a place of love and kindness, he can get carried away sometimes...i feel like we’re gonna rlly delve into the negative impact of this in the CA arc and i am both so ready and not ready at all 

this movie was hella gay which i appreciate. love the gays 

all in all this was fun!! i wish there were more hxh movies lmao i love anime movies. well at least theres the musical LMAOOO im gonna watch that soon 

#the watching continues #i havent posted a lot of my other recaps bc theyre p incomplete lmao #im workin on it tho #not that anybody cares lmao. thats ok tho im posting these for my own reference #hxh #lj watches hxh

[solasan]

all the evens for miss wren pls!!

ask me abt my sidesteps

2. what is their sexual/romantic orientation and gender?

she’s a cis lady, but as for sexuality, who knows. she’s on the ace spectrum i’m pretty sure??? sex and romance is all very messy for her --- she doesn’t trust anyone enough to rly develop feelings for them (until it’s way too late and she’s already in those feelings lmao cough herald cough) and isn’t rly attracted to any specific physical appearance. shes probs demi???

4. what does their villain armor look like? what is their typical style of dress?

intimidating as fuck. she’s here to scare bitches and drink vodka, and she’s all out of vodka. it’s black all over, with sorta... red glowing lines following some of the seams of her armour-plates, and also a whole lot of glowing red eyes etched into the helmet. she has a cape, too, and her gauntlets are clawed. her codename is extinction she needs that pizazz. also shes dramatic

6. what is their mbti type?

entj --- the commander. a ruthless natural-born leader, efficient, and a little bit cold even though she’s all fire. i love her

8. are they more calculating or more sincere in their interactions with others?

oh she thinks she’s calculating. she thinks shes so fucking clever. she is not nearly as calculating as she thinks; she has a lot of anger, and it comes out very easily, so even though she’ll generally make calculated decisions, one push has that all going out the window

10. are they a leader or a follower?

leader for sure. she won’t let anyone have any power over her again, even if it’s just something as basic as who gives orders

12. do they prefer to solve things diplomatically or through violence?

oh violence for sure. diplomacy? wren doesn’t know her

14. are they more daring or more cautious?

oof this is a toughy bcos i disagree w the stats she actually has. i think that she can be daring when she’s nearing the end product, or near a victory???? but during her preparation / planning etc she’s very cautious and tentative

16. what is their best virtue?

ah shit. uh. she’s very passionate ?????? she’s tenacious too she sticks to her plans / her guns. im CRYING she has more bad qualities than good tbh

18. what is their greatest fear?

oh going back to the farm, hands-down. her nightmares are primarily abt that happening lmao. she’s very haunted by what happened to her there, and she’d rather die than return

20. how do they feel about death?

she doesn’t fear death. she has the suicidal heartbreak scar, so she actually welcomes it; it seems very inevitable to her, the sorta... end product of what she’s doing. the only reason she hasn’t killed herself yet is that she wants to see her vengeance through, but there are days when the urge is almost impossible to suppress

22. how do they feel about their telepathy? is it a gift? a curse?

hm complicated. she relies on it very heavily, and she wouldn’t go without it, bcos it keeps her safe, but i’m not sure she’d think of it as a gift. i think it’s just a part of her life, to her; if she wasn’t a telepath, she’d be something else, but she is. she misses it whenever she’s occupying jane tho

24. how do they typically come across to strangers? to friends? do they frequently use their telepathy to influence others’ perceptions of them?

quiet, maybe a little intense. tired, too. the anger is a little harder to notice; you have to rly know her tells to be able to pick up on it, bcos she’s well-practiced in hiding it. she doesn’t use her telepathy to influence others’ perceptions of her unless she rly has to; she does it with argent, bcos she feels like she has to protect herself, so she needs argent to like her, but not like her too much

26. do they have any friends? allies?

lmao no. both ortega and herald would say they’re her friends, altho both of those relationships are complicated, but from her side at least they’re not real friends. or... they are, but she won’t admit it? she likes to think of herself as very emotionally distant, when rly she’s not. it’s like how she denies being in love w herald so hard that it rly fucks her over when she realises

28. what do they find attractive in others? what’s a turn-off?

idk if wren is rly conscious of finding people attractive. she hates arrogance, for sure, that’s a turn-off. she’s also turned off by anyone too pushy, or too similar to herself; she wouldn’t ever date another villain, probably, even if she worked w one. 

i’ll say what she finds attractive in herald, at least. she likes his kindness, how good he is, how genuinely sincere he is in all his dealings. and his honesty. which is hilarious bcos those were all aspects of him that she fucking loathed at first, and just sorta... somehow stumbled into being in love with. he’s warm. she likes warmth, yeah, i think, bcos that’s what initially drew her to ortega

30. what is their love life like?

a fucking MESS. she used to flirt w ortega, years ago, back when she was sidestep, but there’s no residual feelings there on her side; she feels betrayed by him, having expected him to come save her from the farm, or at least try, and it’s not a rational line of thinking but it’s all she’s got. shes very angry with him. massively looking forward to tearing him apart

and then on top of that, she started dating herald to try and fuck up the team dynamics, hopefully make things tense between him and ortega, and also try and get some dirt on him/the team and eventually destroy him. only then, y’know, she went and fell in love w him like an idiot and doesn’t know what to do now

32. do they favor forceful mind control or subtle manipulations?

subtle manipulations. it comes back to that thing of her being cautious when she’s planning stuff; she figures a lighter hand is better, to not make mistakes. she’s good at it, too. i think it might’ve been what she was initially trained in by the farm, and then she just expanded on it

34. are they nostalgic for their sidestep days or eager to move on?

she hates sidestep. she thinks sidestep was a naive little idiot w stars in her eyes. if she met sidestep in a dark alley she would beat her to death. she’s desperate to move on --- almost embarrassed, rly

#denerims #answered #ch: renata gray #suicide / #this is dark bcos it's fh soz #ANYWAY tysm emily ily #under a read more bcos it's Long

[ohjaimelannister]

What are your predictions for 8x04 and the rest of the season? Plus all the major characters, like who do you think will live?

Oh god anon, Im sorry I didnt see this until now! 8x04 is kinda redundant now, and no one could have really predicted that storm of shite.

Okay so this is gonna be long I guess but here we go.

To be honest with you I only have a few prediction as to where the story’s gonna end up, I’m more concerned with the characters but :Kings Landing and the Iron Throne are destroyed by Cersei and/or Daenerys and Drogon. There is no more ‘King or Queen’ of the Seven Kingdoms, they have a council of a few (possibly elected? but probably not because this is Westeros) lords in a democracy or each kingdom goes back to being completely independent (which in the Norths case I wouldn’t actually mind) .

I’m not sure whether the White Walkers are truly gone or not? I’m not sure whether there’s gonna be something to do with them, but probably not. But basically there’s gonna be a lot of destruction and dismantling of the normal before this is all over.

I think this isn’t going to be type of “The End” situation, life will continue and maybe we’ll get some sort of epilogue about how one of the characters we’ve come to know is murdered under /mysterious/ circumstance (just like how the series began with Jon Arryns murder) or there’s another rebellion and the cycle begins all over again. There will be the inlaying message about how the wheel is never ‘broken’ because power will always be coveted and power will always be taken from those that have it. Basically they’re doomed to live this cycle over and over again. Hence the ‘bittersweet’ ending. All those that died along the way, died for nothing because the politics, backstabbing and wars will never be over.

Characters :

Lets start with The Starks, Sansa- I have nothing much for you except I just hope she lives at this point? Honestly, Id like her to rule and be Sansa of House Stark, First of her Name Wardeness of the North. She cares about her people and loves them endlessly so she’s perfect for ruling and protecting the North because of all she’s learned from figures like Tyrion, Cersei, Littlefinger etc.   I don’t really mind if she marries or not but I’d like her to at least experience a loving relationship at some point in her life after all the shit she’s suffered through, and she just deserves to be happy basically. Though saying all of this considering how they’re writing it at the moment I honestly and truly expect her to end up ruling the north completely alone without any of her family with her because that ‘subverts expectations’ and D&D are shits.

Jon - well I hope for the best again but let’s be honest we’re not going to get it. Therrs two ways this could go : 1.) He doesn’t want to rule and I honestly don’t think he will. I would like him too, he’s good in leadership positions and he’s got the ‘saving the masses’ temperament (re: Wildings and getting himself killed for it) but I’m getting real big “gonna kill my auntiegirlfriend” from him at the moment, and I think we all know by know its been implied that Dany is going to go ‘mad’ and hell do it it to stop her from continuing to destroy an already burning city and more people from dying later on when shes finished with Kings Landing. Itll sort of parallel with Jaimes story in the end, though instead of being protected by the new ruler and his family, Jon will confess to his ‘crime’ and be sent to the North to exile, and go off with Tormund via Castle Black. I don’t want to say he establishes a new Nights Watch because there’s really no need for them now? Unless the WW aren’t really gone, then hell feel like he has too and the cycle will start all over again. Either way, he’s going to end up alone pretty much. As Beric and Ser Alistair said his life will never be easy and hell end up fighting others wars forever.

2.) Basically the same thing as before ^ but instead of being exiled, Drogon will just burn him to death in the Throne Room for killing Dany.

Either way Jons not going to get a happy ending I don’t think.

Arya - Her whole arc on the show has been badly written, and in the end I just want her to be happy with her family and Gendry. BookArya just wants a ‘pack’, basically a family. She fought so long and hard to get back to where she was, and even announced it to one of the most dangerous men in the world that she was “Arya Stark of Winterfell” and that she was going home. Where has that been this season? I want her not to kill Cersei, I want her to see what impact Cersei and Dany tearing each other apart has on KL and decide that vengeance isnt the best route and go to Gendry, who she clearly loves and he clearly loves  her. The Hound might even try and convince her to seek out Gendry because there’s someone in the world that obviously loves her for who she is.  But in all honesty? I think theyll have her just leave without saying goodbye to any of her family and just disappear again to find out what’s “west of Westeros”.

Dany - Dead. I dont like saying it, because I think Emilia has done her very best with whats been given to her (and D&D have done her dirty) but Dany is going to end up being killed by Jon for going mad with power and bloodlust basically. All signs have been pointing to it for a while now and without her morale compass in Ser Jorah and experiencing the pain of the abduction and then murder of someone she loved as a sister is obviously going to send her over the edge. I dont think shes ‘evil’ as such but, shes always had a problem with her anger and temperament, which the others have been skillfully subduing for years, with them gone, watch out world. Of course I could be epically wrong and she could actually win, murder all the Lannisters and Jon in a shock twist and take the Throne for herself??

Cersei - Dead. I mean it would be the ultimate shock and plot twist if she somehow lived and killed all the others? And tbh with the writing at the moment I wouldn’t actually hate that. I think shell probably either get killed by Jaime or take the easy way out like she was going to try to do before Stannis got to her during the Battle of the Blackwater. Nothing too surprising on the horizon there I think (hope).

Jaime - I want him to live? I mean I’ve known for many years there’s a 99% chance the he will die but I still have the smallest hope.  If he has to die let it be heroic, let it be him killing Cersei to stop her from blowing up KL to get at Dany and co. Hed only die if he was wounded in the fight to get to Cersei (which is highly likely), or if he was caught by Dany and she has him executed because it looks like he betrayed them all, when in reality he was the only one who could get close to her. Im not gonna say anything about the leaks because I really hope that if he has to die its a GOOD death (and not falling from towers or jsut to be with cersei at the end or some shit) and that its his redemption arc completed and I really hope while hes killing Cersei he says “The things I do for love” and she KNOWS its not about her anymore. I will really be angry if this is a D&D screw up and they mess his entire character arc up because of this “addiction” nonsense. If he has to die let it be with Brienne by his side (because shes gone chasing after him) cradling him. “In the arms of the woman I love”

My dream for him would be that he lives, goes to Tarth, marries Brienne (after begging her forgiveness and shes punched him, ALOT) and they have warrior babies. The end.

Tyrion - I have two endings in mind for him, Dany finds out about someone is plotting behind her back and either Varys sells Tyrion out so he can keep playing his little games (or they both get found out) and he has a trial and is executed. Or if Dany dies he becomes part of this council thats going to lead Westeros.

Brienne - She lives? I cant see anything bad happening to her at this point unless she goes to KL to save Jaimes dumb ass. Either way I think shell live and end up bearing Jaimes child (whether he lives or not) because they were together for weeks and weeks, and it’ll be a plot device used to carry on the Lannister bloodline when the other three die, like Gendry was for the Baratheons. Which lets face it would cover the whole “bittersweet” ending really wouldnt it? She has to carry and bare the child of a man who loved and left her (with hopefully good reason) but shell never know that so she has to raise him/her alone on Tarth as a constant reminder.

Gendry - Well. Boys got two options (maybe three) But I dont think hell stay Lord of Storms End possibly? If its a choice between Storms End or Arya, I hope hell pick Arya. Shes never cared about him being a lord, she loved him for who he was way before he was made one. Or they just live in Storms End together and raise children. (They have to give us something right????) And the third option - Ive always had this really weird foreboding feeling he’d end up married to Sansa, Arya said no and made it clear she doesn’t want to marry, and if she leaves then…….the whole “i have a son, you have a daughter” thing still becomes a reality.

Pod - Well, I hope he lives, gets made a knight and helps Ser Brienne on Tarth basically. Hes too pure to be ruined (though D&D will probs give it a shot)

Davos - Might live? Im not so sure, if he does hell be helping out the new ruler/rulers in some way?? Or hell just be down in FleaBottom adopting random kids left and right.

The Hound - Will probably die in Cleganebowl and Arya will actually give the gift of Mercy this time, but not before he bestows his dad wisdom on her about Gendry/Life. And if he does by some miracle live hell probably go somewhere, build a house and live there in solitude for the rest of his days.

Bronn - Well I had a joke that this shit (i loved the character early on but this season has just been no) would avoid all the major battles somehow, live on over all our faves and get his damned castle……..Im probably not wrong about this one….

Sam and Gilly - Their goodbye already seemed pretty final? I hope we see more of them because just leaving them at Winterfell seems a bit open ended and weird considering Sam was like, part of the most MAJOR plot on the show? Maybe hell put on this council or be Lord of Horn Hill with Gilly as his wife, which would a great middle finger to his horrible father.

#got spoilers #game of thrones #meta #Jaime Lannister #brienne of tarth #Braime #Anonymous

[notwxrriors]

You wanna break down “let me down easy” verse by verse like you talked about? Cause I wanna read it

yeAH i do actually, thank u !!!! im pumped!!!!

this song is a bit over 5 minutes long and it is SO GOOD, holy FUCK, here’s the link to it if u wanna listen to it bc i meAN IT

i really love this song for awtto. i think it captures a lot of their relationship, the feelings of being young and a little outcasted but finding someone who understands you, even if things are a bit strange. anyway. let’s get into it

the way i’m analysing this song is Not what the song is written about, obviously, but music is meant to have many meanings and i love the meanings this song can have.

“You want someone to want you for who you are I want someone to try, then let me down easy, easy tonight Easy, easy tonight“

the first line is so otto @ awsten,,, it feels really tongue-in-cheek, about how aws always wants to be Different. i sorta feel like the song goes through the years that they know each other, so it’d start at the very beginning, with scene aws and them starting to get to become familiar with one another, start having deeper conversations, esp about romantic stuff. to “want someone to try, then let me down easy” is kinda like...otto just accepting that this isn’t going to last. it’s a one night thing, and that’s okay.

“Honey, it’s no secret that with matters of the heart I’m reserved, I’m irrational and rarely ever start But since the world’s dark and often inhumane Relish our condition, come drinking in the rain”

THOSE FIRST TWO LINES...SO otto. the awkwardness he has, especially with awsten, he just...doesn’t try. but the next two are a bit more optimistic, maybe a bit of aws rubbing off on him

“‘Cause you remember when, after Paris We all decided the best way to fight it was Drink wine, dance here and pray And make love that lasts with a vengeance”

i don’t think paris is a particular thing here, it’s sorta more the concept of traveling together, getting into messes, falling in love and trying to not fall in love. also they fuck, so,

“So you can join the cowards all aboard the outrage train You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave And scratch the little itch 'til you’re moving like a motherfucker Up in this bitch”

i love this verse. the subtle aggression in it, the being done with being closeted/secret in this situation. otto trying to get awsten out of whatever shell he’s put himself in, telling him he can stay scared or get over it

“You wanted to fight for a cause Then go out and fall in love Don’t stop, don’t stop believing In truth and grace in the grievance”

another sorta jab at awsten tbh, wanting to fight for a cause and all that. teenage rebellion. but isn’t the biggest rebellion, in conservative ass texas, loving another man openly? freely? truth and grace in the grievance is a lil self-explanatory in this context, just keep believing in whatever cause you’re fighting for even if it’s hard

“So look at me and tell me what I already know That I trialled and I failed and it’s good to let it go Sometimes life sucks, everything is lame Not everything’s as easy as making lemonade”

i loVE these first two lines. it’s like “yeah, you screwed up, but that’s okay. just keep moving on”, that’s a very awsten headspace and he’d love to remind otto that he’s not just his mistakes. the next two lines are jus cute

“And so dismembering our state of balance With lust requited, a gaze undivided With a cool mind and warmth in your face A good heart, a grace under pressure”

this is. so gorgeous. just commentary on awsten, really. “warmth in your face” is so Cute considering how rosy aws always is, and a good heart and grace under pressure (see: chorus)

“You give me a good reason to be heartsick again To be here, to be strong, to be oddly and boldly estranged From the loss and bitter years I found myself descending into tedium and fear”

maybe my favorite verse in this whole fuckin song?? in this context, awsten giving him a reason to be strong and bold, to be heartsick again. to love him. from the “loss and bitter years” of being younger, of guilt and shame around sexuality, and awsten just...helps him come to terms to it, even if it hurts sometimes, even if they dont ever actually date

“If it’s late, you’re drunk and wanting A reason, some reason to live I always, I always say Just put on some Whitesnake”

aws and otto both don’t drink, so the alcohol refs in this song are sorta moot, but i think by here we’ve moved into more recent times with them (and honestly this falls in well w the c**r* thing, like this verse takes place right after theyve broken up). awsten’s...worse, honestly, mental-health wise, but otto’s always his comfort person. he calls otto when they’re not together, and they stay on the phone long into the night, sometimes without even talking, just soft music playing from one of their ends

“Honey, it’s no secret that I’ve been losing my way In the weirdest of moments and the stupidest of ways But hey, I’m still young and it’s gonna be okay I got solipsism, baby, and I brought lemonade”

and hell, maybe otto isn’t doing too well, either. it comes in different ways than awsten’s. and the third line is so sweet, that optimism that wasn’t there at the beginning is now present and he’s using it to help aws this time instead of vise versa.

“I’ll surrender then, all my balance And be excited and drink to tonight It’s not a, a bad time, time spent with you There’s cool lights and songs with good lyrics”

seeing each other again in a romantic context, after a few years of awsten’s ex. awsten’s in houston, otto’s with him, and they’re alone. it’s like being barely-adults again, and otto lets down those walls he’s been building the past few years, and things settle right back into place

“We never have to talk again, whatever, up to you But since you’re putting up with me Here’s another toast just to you Let’s dance, off the beat Then mosey out together and say goodbye on the street”

the thought of awsten “putting up with” otto is sorta laughable, considering their respective personalities, but sometimes otto really does feel like that. also, them dancing together is a VERY sweet thought, and seperating at the end of the night like they’ve done many times before, feeling okay about it

“Don’t stop, don’t stop believing In truth and personal freedom I want someone to want me for who I am I want someone to try, or let me down easy, easy tonight”

the last chorus is a bit different. instead of “grace and the grievance”, we’ve developed into “personal freedom”, and thats. fuckin beautiful, honestly, with aws getting out of his last relationship and he and otto rekindling things again. and for otto, “i want someone to want me for who i am”, is a bit of a realization that maybe awsten is the only one who does. i think it’s kinda on brand though, to still feel like someone has to try with him, and that he’s going to be let down, even all these years later.

#ask #its so LONG #ao #still cant put read mores on asks cool #thanks

[pbjpuppy]

do every oc question but with horsepower PLEASE

DUDE I WAS SO HOPING SOMEONE WOULD ASK ABT HER IM SO EXCITED

THIS IS SO LONG SO I’M PUTTING A READMORE

1. Do they sleep with a stuffed animal? If they have multiple, who’s the favorite?

SHE does Not surprisingly!! BUT similarly to Giovanni with his kids, Serene is always sleeping next to her bc she’s Warm and Soft so it’s like, kinda the same thing 

She IS the type to love sleeping with a ton of pillows though

2. Can they take care of a plant? What about a pet? What about a child?

Horsie doesn’t have the world’s greenest thumb but she could probably keep a houseplant alive!! She likes nature a lot she’s just not stellar at gardening

She would be REALLY GOOD with a pet though that animal would THRIVE and she’d be the type to take like 400 pictures of her pet and spam everyone with them like “Look at this Fucking Angel” 

And she’s DEFINITELY GOOD W KIDS seeing as she’s basically raising Serene!! Serene can testify that she’s the Best babysitter (even if she accidentially taught Serene like. 20 separate curse words gdgjdsk) 

3. Ask them to describe their love interest.

OOH FUN DIALOGUE

“Um, she’s.. REALLY pretty. Like, really fuckin’ pretty. I think she made me like, 17% more lesbian the first time I saw her. And like, we’ve known each other for a long time and we know each other’s secrets n’ stuff… ahahah, that came out really weird! I just mean we’re good friends, y’know? Hah. Anyway, she’s a bad bitch, I’d die for her. Love her.”

Her love interest is actually a character named Destiny who I havent drawn yet!!

4. Do they look good in red?

I think she could pull it off bc red is in her color scheme but also like.. there’s already so much warm colors!! I think she looks the best in gray or black tbh (like imagine her in a black suit or something she’d look SNAZZY)

5. Speech! Speech! Speech! Speech! Will they give one, and what about?

“HHuuh WHAT AM I S’POSED TO TALK ABOUT? Fuck. Uh. Respect lesbians.” Mic drop

6. Who will they take advice from, no matter what it is? Who won’t they take advice from, no matter what it is?

She’ll ALWAYS take advice from her friends, especially Destiny, bc she trusts them to know when she’s being too hot-headed or rash- There’s a character in her friend group who hasn’t got a name yet but he’s REALLY good at giving advice!!

She will NEVER take advice from her old rival Lockjaw, and she shouldn’t- he’s always out to sabotage her somehow and plays dirty a lot of the time, and he’s known to be a huge liar (Plus they just hate each other)

7. Describe them in three words. Now let them describe themself in three words.

My three words: Fiery, protective, loving!!

Her three words: “Uh.. Gay. Handsome. Wait, scratch that. Gay, HOT, optimist.”

8. Do complex puzzles intrigue or frustrate them?

She WANTS to be intrigued but she just gets frustrated and crumples up the paper after a few minutes if it’s not a super easy riddle sjhsjf she knows by now that it’s just Not Worth It

9. Do they empathize with non-sentient things (dolls, plants, books…)?

She only usually does with like people (or I guess furry)-shaped objects like stuffed animals and dolls, and even then not to an extreme degree- it’s really Serene who has the EXTREME empathy and empathizes with everything!!

10. What age do they most want to be right now?

THIS IS SUCH AN INTERESTING QUESTION she misses being a kid like Serene is a lot, but she’s pretty happy where she is- she’s in a better place than she has been for a long time at the current point of her story! If anything, she wishes she could go back and tell her middle/high school self that things are gonna be okay

11. They’ve won the lottery. Spend, or save?

She’d SAY she’s gonna save it and REALLY try but she wouldn’t be able to resist splurging on some really cool stuff bc COME ON she won the LOTTERY!! She’d also wanna buy gifts for the Monster family because she wants to thank them for how generous they’ve been to her so it’s really very wholesome 

12. Do they like romance in the books they read (or in the book they’re in)?

She doesn’t READ that’s for NERDS

JUST KIDDIN but nah she’s not really one for “mushy stuff” and prefers action/adventure stories!! She’s also a fan of mysteries and anything that’s not Painfully Heterosexual 

13. Name one thing their parents taught them.

Her parents weren’t the best, but they did teach her very good manners- she did go through a BIG rebel phase where she definitely was Not as polite, but overall her politeness and natural charisma really help her out in social situations (especially when she has to get favors from people and stuff)

14. Would they agree with the term ‘guilty pleasure’? Do they have any?

I think she’d agree with the term in a general sense!! I’m not sure exactly what guilty pleasures she has, probably just the fact that she can be kind of a thrill-seeker and take unnecessary risks- not involving Serene though ofc

15. What would they consider a waste of time– other than school or work?

The first thing that came to mind is that she considers arguing with people you KNOW aren’t gonna change their mind to be a waste of time- Especially when it comes to social justice type issues she knows not to waste her energy on people who just won’t listen (but she’s argumentative by nature and usually ends up doing it against her better judgement)

16. If money wasn’t a limit, what would they wear?

LEATHER JACKETS AND COOL BOOTS AND SUCH!! She’d also wanna buy a bunch of cool pins to put on said jacket (And she’d probably have to get it tailored bc of her wings too which would also be money..) She would also probably get some kind of cool patterned horseshoes!!

17. Do they like children?

Yes she DOES and Serene is her favorite (Even though she calls her a booger)

19. Do they study before tests? Practice before job interviews?

NOPE she usually dives into most things headfirst, which can be VERY UNWISE but she feels like it keeps her brain clear to not stress about stuff beforehand  

20. What do they like that nobody else does?

HMM… I don’t really have an answer for this one tbh!! I’ve been thinking about it for a bit, the only thing that I can think of is that she likes waking up REALLY early and the smell of smoke, but lots of people also like those things

21. What would it take for them to break up with someone? What would be the last straw?

She’s actually really bad at getting out of situations like that, like if she’s in a relationship she’s not happy in she’s bad at getting herself out of it- but probably something that really make her realize she needs to get outta there would be if the other person seriously hurt her on purpose 

22. Do they like being called pet names? Do they call other people pet names? What’s their go-to?

She LOVES pet names and calls EVERYONE pet names (unless they’re not comfortable ofc)!! Nicknames are kinda hard to make from “Horsepower” so a lot of the time she’s given weird affectionate pet names instead, it’s somthing that she’s kinda known for

DEFINITELY her go-to pet name is “babe”, she calls almost everyone that and I like to imagine that it’s very soothing bc she has a lovely deep voice.. other go-to pet names are baby, hon and love!! She has a lot of personal nicknames/pet names for individual people though 

Tbh she only really refers to someone as their full name if she doesn’t know them or if she’s mad at them shfshf

23. Stability or novelty?

Novelty!! Stability is important to her but she gets bored and anxious if she’s stuck in the same routine for too long, that’s why she likes taking care of Serene bc Serene is ALWAYS doing new things

24. Honesty or charity?

Ooh that’s difficult… Once again both are important values to her, but I’m gonna go with honesty- she’s a very (bluntly) honest person

25. Safety or possibility?

Possibility!! As established before she’s kinda a daredevil she doesn't care about SAFETY (unless it’s anyone else but her doing it then she’s gonna lecture them)

26. Talent or effort?

Effort!! She is EXTREMELY passionate and such an overachiever about everything shkfskh it’s like Hey Horsepower Can You Do This Simple Task For Me and she’s like Oh You Wanted Me To Change The World? I’ll Do That

27. Forgiveness or vengeance (or…)?

Definitely vengeance she holds grudges REALLY BAD and as kind as she tries to be if someone who hurt her or her friends gets hurt… she can’t help being satisfied

30. What would they do if they knew it would be forgiven?

OH THATS A HEAVY QUESTION since she holds grudges so bad she’s probably try to get revenge on Lockjaw for all the grief he’s caused her over the years, if she knew she’d be off the hook she’d get really nasty about it bc her anger at him has just been Boiling for years 

WOW THAT TOOK A WHILE BUT IT WAS SO EXTREMELY FUN THANK U SO MUCH FOR ASKING!!! I’ll do the other one tomorrow bc I need to go to BED 

Also I did cut out a few questions!! I either didn’t wanna answer them or I had answered them before 

#chitchat #furbrain #Horsepower

[fish-d]

it’s time for jade’s lnd us tour opinions

just saw the new lnd at the boston opera house, saturday 2/10 2:00pm matinee, and it was. HOOO BOY IT WAS. SO MUCH. (in a good way i promise)

cast:

the phantom: bronson norris murphy christine: rachel anne moore madame giry: karen mason raoul: sean thompson gustave: jake heston miller meg giry: mary michael patterson fleck: yesy garcia squelch: richard koons gangle: stephen petrovich

ALRIGHT ok overall numerical rating, like, 8/10, which honestly isn't something i ever thought i'd say about LND, but i guess that goes to show You Can't Like Things Ironically. or at least i can’t we gonna do Onions chronologically, for simplicity's sake, but tl;dr: they changed a Lot of good shit but there are still A Couple Things id love to see addressed before alw stops pouring his pension into it (also for brevity's sake im gonna skip anything i dont have any Strong Opinions on, so if i didnt mention a jam its bc it was inoffensively good)

ACT ONE

'til i hear you sing - bronson is so good. he's a much hunchier/gremin-ier phantom than im used to with lnd (coming from the australian production and ben lewis's Big Man Scary Eyes erik) but he does it really well. he kind of swallows his words on low notes, but MMPH the belt at the end changed my damn life. 10/10

the coney island waltz - AHHH the fleck/gangle/squelch trio was EXCELLENT in this show - fleck was a little underehearsed, but as an u/s i Dont Mind and im impressed they did all the lifts so cleanly, seeing as she is a Lot bigger than katrina kemp. the aesthetic in this number is? SO much bigger and more striking live than it is on the dvd; everything is GORGEOUS and the stage was Very alive (altho its still a little slow when they're all coming out of the bigtop) 8/10

christine disembarks - i got a snap from @sapphic-corgi​ abt this during intermission that just read "meg is gay for christine" and tbh i feel it. this was definitely mary's emotional highpoint here noah fence

arrival of the trio - OK HERE WE GET SOME CHANGES I LIKE: they actually gave the disembarkers a proper ramp to come down, and as one of the new yorkers calls "look, it's christine daae!", she comes out of the ramp in the fog and strikes a really beautiful pose with a really beautiful smile - and she holds it until the flashes pop and her smile vanishes. its REALLY good and a striking example of her French Facade(tm) ala "masquerade". bless that change

what a dreadful town! - ok so big changes here i really jived with, particularly pertaining to raoul - they make him nicer with each iteration of lnd and every time its a good decision. london raoul genuinely seems on the edge of hitting someone the whole musical, but us tour raoul really IS trying, and i love it ! during his first back-and-forth with christine, they embrace each other, despite raoul's frustration, and as gustave plunks away on the piano he doesn't chastise him. instead, christine asks him what he's playing, and tells him its too late in the evening for it - but raoul seems proud of his kid, which is REAL nice. and then he goes and picks up the music box and remarks on its construction and sits down to play with gustave !!! he only leaves bc he gets the summons - so gustave still gets to mourn the lost time with his father, but you never get the feeling raoul is overmuch cruel. hes just. got Issues, Man (i will say, though, sean's performance seemed rather stilted in his dialogue? like he. doesn't know his lines? there were some PAUSES i was. suspicious of)

look with your heart - rachel anne moore has a phenomenal rapport with jake (which she attributes to having a daughter roughly the same age) and they both performed this excellently - jake flubbed a line and neither of them reacted to it at all, which i think is ESPECIALLY impressive for such a young performer. (HE'S TWELVE, Y'ALL, LORD)

beneath a moonless sky - ok this was the sexiest i have ever seen this performed - its SO passionate. rachel glides between "angry", "forlorn", "horny", and back to "angry" with INSURMOUNTABLE grace, holy FUCK, and bronson's phantom is so genuinely reticent and also Very Randy the whole time that i fuckin FELT IT, MAN. none of that mournful love dirge, here, they FUCKED and they want you to KNOW. i also appreciate the change from "i had to, both of us knew why" "we both knew why" - instead, christine responds "i don't know why". i feel like that's more poignant to the situation (bc really erik has No Good Goddamn Excuse)

once upon another time - @theatricalbride​ wept to this. i almost fuckin did. absolutely phenomenal

the beauty underneath - ok i bought these tickets because i heard the utica boot of this song (based on the hamburg production) and it fucking lived up to the expectation. oh my GOD. the lead-in w/ the phantom reprise was phenomenal; the movement between sets was so fluid; gangle, fleck, and squelch were there being Cool as Shit the whole time (and reacting to gustave's highnotes, which was baller. u rly get the sense they're close-ish with Mister Y and i love that). erik Touched gustave a lot in a  way that felt really Genuinely Phantomy and was so jazzed to be with his kid? GOD

the phantom confronts christine - bronson ripped my idiot heart out and threw it down the orchestra pit. when he reached for christine, sobbing, i thought i was going to Die Right There in the Balcony Seats

ACT TWO

why does she love me? - ok the actual song was good but i have some Onions abt mary's performance afterwards :/ im VERY fond of sharon millerchip from the australian production; she plays meg with a really honest sort of vulnerability, and her own fear of her dedication to erik makes "sail across the sea / put us out of mind / close your eyes and dream / let yourself stay blind" hit much harder - because meg is doing what she does less out of jealousy or a desire for vengeance, but out of desperation because she *doesn't know what else to do*. mary plays it... much angrier than i think the role works well with. mary's meg is Pissed about the events of lnd and it makes her later suicide attempt feel forced - because this meg would feel more natural trying to murder christine or erik intentionally, rather than herself

devil take the hindmost - the only laugh of the show was for "[pops up from behind the bar] not afraid of me, you say? B)" and tbh it was well-deserved; the timing was Excellent. sean performed much more admirably in act two, particularly here, and i could like. smell the whisky on him; he was so fucking plastered. also when erik came at him he dragged a chair between the two of them, as if to hide from him, and im STILL laughing about it - esp bc erik tossed it across the fucking room, into another chair. 3-chair casualty for this number (and my e/r heart Really Appreciated how vicious they were ehe)

mother, did you watch? - similar onions to "why does she love me?": mary just seems MAD here, and i think it does a disservice to meg, as a character P:

before the performance - 1) erik does the "angel of music" enchanting reach thing to pull christine to the mirror and give her the necklace, and its a GOOD setup for the aria, and 2) honestly i know it was in the australian production but i just want to say the "twisted every way" reprise here destroyed me, mind & body. my god. (also erik and raoul are onstage in the rafters for this so thats neat)

love never dies - so i have No Idea if this happens in any other production, but for the US tour, as christine sings, she looks back and forth at erik and raoul, who are flanking the stage/implied to be in the wings - and as she looks a little too long at erik, raoul storms off, and it looks like christine forgets the words and begins to panic - until erik reaches out, as aforementioned, and enchants her to hit those fucking stellar keychange high notes that made my heart stop fucking beating, so that was a Good Detail

ah, christine! - raoul wasn't in the mirror for the "little lotte" reprise, but i imagine that's a visibility issue (bc u Cannot see that mirror from the balcony) - but ok. they keep fixing plot holes in this, but they still left in "i know where she's taking him" from erik - literally how. how does he know. what would have Really made it is would be see raoul go with them, and for him to know where gustave was being taken because he was suspicious of/empathetic towards meg after their conversation in the bar. like their Bit before "devil takes the hindmost" FEELS like a setup for this resolution and im beefed they didn't take the opportunity to use it.

streets of coney island - OOOOH THIS WAS SO GOOD the cacophonous "beauty underneath" reprise here was wonderful, and it gives a new appreciation to the coney island set, especially now that the musical has taken a Darker tone. the frantic chase here is EXCELLENT, and its busy enough that you never see christine, giry, or the phantom until they Want you to (big shoutout to bronson’s GUSTAAAAVE holler)

conclusion - im still bothered they don't Do anything with raoul, but besides that, this scene was. genuinely heartwrenching. erik's quiet plea for christine not to tell gustave of his real parentage was SO striking. IT WAS A GREAT CONCLUSION and the fade-out on gustave stroking erik's face was SO UPSETTING (altho jake "pushed" more than tapped him and i thought for a hot second they were gonna go full sweeney todd and gustave was gonna push him into the fucking ocean)

so uhhhhh i went to this intending for it to be simple and fun entertainment i could rib later and i wept real tears ! negativity is hard to maintain in the face of incredible work and craftsmanship from literally everyone involved. fantastic fucking job; im mad this tour is moving on and i wont get to hear rachel hit those fucking high notes again

(also: everyone was lovely at the stagedoor and as much as i complained about mary here, she complimented my hair and i love her very much)

#love never dies #lnd #lnd us tour #poto #phantom of the opera #personal bullshit #ok to reblog #txt #big s/o to theatricalbride for coming with me along w/ my buddies sunny and gabrielle #caiden just happened to fucking be there lmao

[survivorjordanpines]

Episode 8: I think I'll call her Vengeance. - Adam

So tonight went well. We didn't have to go to tribal council and Nahte voted out the person I, literally, did not want to meet up with if we swapped again or merged. I don't know Cole, so maybe he's a decent guy, but I've seen and heard some things that were uglie that I just didn't want to deal with. But anyways. This fucking challenge. Honestly, it's like demon music. It's like Satan himself threw up into my ears. UGH.

I know what you're thinking. Adam crushed another redemption challenge? That means it's time for whiny McBitchersons 3 right? Wrong, this episode has been cut short to make room for this heartfelt speech about my love for Andreas: Andreas, Love is like a flower, It only blooms when you're both on redemption and you keep winning together and staying alive and being the only person I talk to right now. And I know I never tell you truthfully how well I'm doing in the challenge but that's only because it's a stupid thing to ask and I'm of course going to lie because although I want you to stay alive too I still want you to only be second best because if for some reason one of the other bitches ever did better than us I still want to stay alive. I had a dream, that one day we would both emerge from the island together, and return to the game we were so wrongfully terminated from. But sometimes you have to wake up from the dream, and realize it's only me or you. And I'm glad it's either one of us, because none of these other weak ass hoes who came to redemption ever deserved it. Like check out these lame fucking scores they all gave. It's like they hardly even tried. The ones that actually tried that is! How many people just straight up quit when they get to redemption? I seen two so far and that shit is funny, it's like you ain't even want it at all! Must be scared or just feelin shitty about being voted out. But bitch we all feel shitty after being voted out! You gotta harness that fury and channel it into your redemption challenges. I'm getting a little off track here, but the point was Andreas is my dude, and while I won't really swear to avenge you because I'm pretty sure the people who voted you out are the friends that I was voted out for having, so it's like if I ever get back I probably won't have much of a choice of who to work with, BUT if given the opportunity I will do right by you, because your chill and friendly and it seems like they did you wrong. So, if I win cool, if you win whatever, that sucks for me but better than someone like Cole winning redemption after just being voted out, cuz this challenge really is anyone's game. So good luck dude. I'm rootin for us

I hate this challenge. There is no way I'm going to be able to discern anything. I know that whoever wins that most useful will probably go the isle. So like I can't wait to get voted out.

This challenge sucks! It is so hard to hear all the different songs. Right now my tribe is very quiet. I hope we have a swap soon so I can have a more active tribe, I haven't talked to anyone one on one in DAYS. Except Drew, he's the only one who seems to make any kind of effort. I'm pretty sure that Regan and Charlotte are aligned but are not saying anything. Why else would they keep trying to be the ones to go to Jordan Island? It is suspicious all right! Lets hope we win immunity so I can do no work for another day :-)

At this point I'm not sure if I'll win. I have a feeling my time is running out. I'm gonna have to do some wicked talking to Adam and see if I can convince him to fall on the sword for me lmao. Doubt it'll happen but you never know. If I can't, then Im gonna give him my idol in the hopes that he can actually do something with it. I'm kind of scared. Redemption Island has always been so good to me... plz dont fuck me over

I feel like I confess too much and I'm going to cringe when I read them back once the season is over. We're about 21 minutes away from the challenge deadline and I just don't know what's going to happen. I think we relied way too heavily on Shazam, but the other tribes are probably going to do the same thing. It's basically going to come down to luck on this one, I think... and who has the more wrong answers to deduct points. Also if Situations isn't that emo song at the beginning, I'm quitting the game right here, right now. No joke. 

GOD CAN YOU BELIEVE I FORGOT KAREN WAS EVEN ON THIS TRIBE SINCE SHE CONTRIBUTED ABSOLUTELY NOTHING?? WHAT A FUCKING MOOD.

Okay so update. Adam told me that he has 12 songs and I have 17 and we are waiting for results and IM GOING TO PUKE IM SO NERVOUS FUCK

(this is meant for last round oops, put it in there if u can) im so fucking pissed off bc of this damn tribe, i am so done w them like really? THREE people threw, apparently bc i wasnt able to submit like thats a shitty excuse just say u want me out or that u want ur ass to be immune and get idols i cant wait for the one round that despite them throwing, me david and ryan get good enough scores to win and one of us ends up immune i hope cole’s ass gets kicked on redemption and emma can choke too AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA When! Will! This! Neverending! Marathon! Of! Tribal! Councils! End!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LczLqQWCihg&feature=youtu.be https://youtu.be/qmpGefnZ0RQ TO TOP THIS ALL OFF I WANT TO KEEP EMMA AND LILY DOESNT AND ITS DOWN TO THE FOUR OF US AND IDK WHAT IM GOING TO DO EMMA WHY ARE U SO FUCKING USELESS WWHYHGUIJYHFILUWYSHDFILCKEWHSFLCAWEVC9OIWAREUHRWLSD,U]

I think I'll call her Vengeance. Winning this redemption was bitter sweet. Cuz Andreas was the sweet but I'm still bitter. A lot of good came out of this though, I'll make sure of it. Cuz God has a plan and I intend to implement it. You know I was just being friendly at the beginning for fun. You know we're stuck on this island for the same reason, and it's nice to have someone to discuss the game with. But we just kept winning together! Did you know he's the king of redemption? I had no idea. Apparently the dude won like a ton on 3 different seasons. But what's a king to a God ;) It's sad when you really do the math. Because before it was over he told me he got 17, and I only had 12 so I told him you deserve it. I still had hope, because I had faith in my answers so maybe he had made some mistakes, and if he got 3 wrong I won. Turns out he got 4, so if he had just not even guessed those, he would've still had 13 and won. But oh well. We were talking before about it, because he said he wanted to give it to me if he's leaving cuz otherwise it's null. Chrissa gave it to him, cuz she knew she wouldn't win but girl didn't even try. 2000 points? Pathetic. I mean we totally blew it out of the water but still. Anyway we asked to do results earlier at like 9:30 and Jordan took a bit to process the scores and he told us it was 12-9. And well, I think you know whose was whose. It was kinda funny, cuz he yelled MY IDOL!!! and I was like Quick throw it to me!!! It would have been cute if he did an *action* but I guess he's not about that. But anyway I lied before cuz as we said goodbye I asked him if there was anyone he wanted me to murder for him. It felt like the right thing to do. He told me again that Ari really did him dirty. I was hoping he'd say her cuz if he had said like Ryan or Jess her allies I would've had to straight up lie, but Ari I can work with. Idk if they'll not vote me out or not but I don't really have allies going back in anyway. I'm just gonna wing it. So now I've done whatever the blunt equivalent of pouring one out for him is, and I had Jordan find me a picture of my idol to gaze upon, and it's this cute little crab necklace. And I'm just thinking, I think I'll call her Vengeance. 

Alright, so. Tribal's happening soon, and while I am hoping it all works out, a part of me is kinda worried. I know David Robb isn't gonna be going, that's for sure... But I WAS a target, and have been for a little while. Sure, Cole is gone, but Emma might still turn the others against me. I think it's the most logical move, though, because as I said to David earlier... [11:12:07 AM] Lily Owen: So, tbh, here’s my hot take on this [11:12:12 AM] Lily Owen: Emma didn’t contribute [11:12:18 AM] Lily Owen: She threw last round [11:12:22 AM] Lily Owen: Do I need to say it

#supportyourlocaljordanpines