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martyrbat · 8 months

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sorry but im still just thinking about how batman 105 (aka the comic where bruce gets his tits out and asks khoa to stay) begins with them having a sloppy breakup in the rain and khoa offering bruce to travel and save the world together, they'll live lavishly and gather resources. and then MAYBE they can tackle gotham together. hes trying to convince bruce to stay and that hes going to get himself killed because of his stupid bleeding heart and how he blames himself for every loss. that together they can conquer so much more. and bruce responds by calling him broken and telling him he's angry that bruce is always going to care about the people he saves. he's still determined to go, still choosing gotham over his best (and only) friend.

but he tells him this as theyre in the rain and khoa is still trying to convince bruce to change his mind despite the plane being there and knowing that bruce wont. bruce is one of the only people thats seen his face and knows his name, the only person that truly knows him—yet all those years they spent together still isn't as important as that vow bruce took as a mourning 8 year old boy. so he demands for bruce to never say his name again—he doesn't get that right or the one to see his face ever again. and bruce still doesnt change his mind, leaving khoa behind without so much as a glance behind him.

while batman annual 2021 is khoa bragging about his greatest feat—taking down madame midas, the woman who laughed as his mother was killed and as her father strong-armed his father's independent business. he doesn't tell bruce this but it still ends with bruce pointing out there has to be a reason he cared and spent so long on it. khoa denies it, of course, repeating back what he tells himself constantly. he doesnt care about anything (and, by extension, about anyone). but the comic literally just showed us, the reader, between those two pages that this isnt true! he had a personal motive, he recired back the words she told him all those years again! but after khoa says he doesnt care about anything is the first time on panel that bruce calls him khoa again (as far as i remember :p)

but then khoa is suddenly changing the topic!! not allowing bruce to continue, not even acknowledging the name or all the years it nust have been between the last time someone called him that—the last time BRUCE called him that. and its only after the accusation of khoa caring like how he does—of khoa not being ‘broken’ like how he said the last time he attempted to use that name!! AND that this is their last chronical interaction (on panel) before khoa is the one leaving bruce behind to train bao...

im sure bruce used it off panel before this (and it was probably during sloppy old man sex) but this being it on paper has been making me go >:3c!!!!

#remember the more sloppy you are with your emotions the more sloppy that pussy will hit....#no but seriously unless im missing a panel somewhere where bruce calls him by name before this.....#like only after the accusation of khoa having a secret motive or caring for this hes shown to use khoa's name #watch it be like. one line from batman 115 or whatever thats the first instead but GOD they make me feel insane.#does any of this make sense. am i making sense.#just the way they recognize each other—the other like a shard of glass from the same broken mirror #in the way it reflects each other's ‘worse’ qualities.#bruce's ego and his dedication and obsession to the mission he vowed his life to—who he may be without his guilt and compassion #khoa and his moments of caring and getting close to someone else despite the pain it inevitably brought #and how hes been told his entire life hes a psychopath and cant (and how he wouldn't allow himself to)#anyways. hi. who actually reads these ramblings... sorry if you do i love you i hope youre doing ok....#posts from the crypt #ghostbat #c: batman | i: 105 #c: batman annual 2021 #c: batman | i: 118 #crypt's panels #bruce wayne #minhkhoa khan

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samdeancrimespree · 6 days

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it’s time to overanalyze the impala destruction scene <3 with actual screencaps this time. my analysis of the shot will be Above the screencap. hopefully that makes sense

so sam tries once again to talk to dean about dad. dean yells at him again for suddenly wanting to do what dad would’ve wanted and sam opens up to him about feeling guilty. then sam says he’s dealing with dads death, but dean isn’t. dean doesn’t say anything, just looks at him like This.

we don’t know yet, what john said to dean before he died. but it’s hanging over dean. i think sam’s reaction to dad’s death makes dean want to keep johns words a secret even more. if he tells sam that’s what dad wanted, sam might go along with it.

every time someone brings up john, dean hears his words again, and he feels even worse. he can’t deal with dads death because that means acknowledging what he said, and it’s just too much. he already lost dad, he can’t lose sam too.

sam says “i’ll leave you alone.” and walks away. we only hear a few steps, but that might just be for clarity. who knows. or he just. took a few steps then stopped.

either way, dean turns around and calmly picks up a crowbar. he smashes the window of a random car. takes a few breaths.

as he turns around, he looks up from the ground. looks at something in front of him. it seems for a second like he’s going to stop.

then he looks down at the impala. he glances back up, just for a second. right where sam was standing before. it looks like he’s making sure sam is watching him. you want me to deal with it? fine.

“next time someone asks me if i’m okay, i’m gonna start throwing punches.”

so he goes crazy on the impala. we all know that part.

he destroys the car right after he fixes it. specifically the trunk of the car, where they keep their hunting arsenal. maybe that was just the closest part, or maybe he’s had enough of his family dying because of hunting. he didn’t want to find the demon if it meant sam would die, but now sam might die anyway. no matter what he does, the car/his family will be destroyed. he can’t fix it, and it’s futile to even try. all his work, all the time and love he put into sam might have been worthless.

when he finally stops, he looks wrecked. this is the most emotion he’s allowed himself since dad died.

this is the last shot of the episode. him staring for a good 10 seconds, still on that same eyeline. he seems like he’s looking at something.

he lets himself look sad for a second, but he doesn’t turn away like he normally would. he wants sam to see. this was all for him. it’s like… there. i’m upset. was that enough? can you stop asking now?

then his expression hardens, shutting down and covering his emotions again. it’s like he’s warning sam. dean can’t be sad, only angry. only destructive. this time, it’s the car. next time, it might be sam. the two things he’s supposed to look after, both ruined. and dad isn’t here to fix it. dean has to figure it out on his own.

it looks like he’s asking sam to just leave it alone. don’t ask me about this. i can’t talk about it. and for now, sam believes it’s just about dad dying.

and then the episode ends. i genuinely cannot tell if im supposed to think sam is there or not. but like its the same eyeline!!! and the shot is pushed in and to the right!! sam could be standing in the same spot for all we know !! also what else would he be having a silent convo with in bobby’s junkyard? the dog? his own reflection? the only thing that makes sense to me is that sam is there. that he’s doing this For sam. maybe this is something everyone noticed but me until rn but. im going insane

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likes-words-and-shrimp · 4 days

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Thinking about radiohusk with the strangled by the red string trope, except it's Alastor who's in control of the red string and brings it around both him and Husk. Entangling them. Unable to move or escape, unable to exist outside of each other's existence. Let's become forced soulmates where not even death will do us part. Let's share a destiny together, and have dreams of each other every night. Let's fall in love, even if it didn't work the first few times. Even if you don't want it, but that doesn't matter. Just give it time. We only have the rest of eternity.

#hazbin hotel #radiohusk #twitter thoughts #my headcanon is that they knew each other when they were alive so alastor is extra obsessed #struggling to finish this long fic in the meantime #one day I will make a radiohusk soulmate au but horror version #or hanahaki which you only get once you die so its extra worse #im just throwing things at the wall here

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squidkidnerd · 11 months

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every agent 24 shipper is like "3 is a bad bitch and 8 is obsessed w them" but have you considered... the opposite. 8 is a bad bitch (because 3 helped them gain confidence in themself) and 3 is obsessed w them (because 8 taught them to how to actually express their emotions). imagine the possibilities. the possibilities are endless, man.

#splatoon #agent 24 #this character writing advice video I watched once #suggested that to make characters more complex #u add contradictions #and ive been obsessed w that ever since #genuinely so much more interesting if #the shy girl is more than just the shy girl #and the badass is more than just the badass #it rlly irks me when ppl write 3 n 8 as ONLY that way #god #its worse for 8 i think

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elvisqueso · 4 months

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I am on some bullshit right now, bruh

#just re-watched pocahontas for the first time in many many years and dawg #the character animation in that film is so gorgeous #like they went so hard on ACTING through the animation #im getting obsessed again like i was when i was little #like u gotta understand: the disney pocahontas character (a truly fictional character inspired by real events let's get that straight)#i was like in love with her. i wanted to be her like oh my god #and the way they animated john smith was such a departure from their other disney LI's up til then (as *i* recall)#so detailed!! the expressions!!! the fucking YEARNING!!!!!!#best love story out of all the disney flicks imho. as a Story it's so powerful #I'm gonna think about the symbolism of them having to part #after grandmother willow had told them 'only when the fighting stops can you be together'#implying that the fighting isn't over and probably never will be #fuxking painfuslfjk #i know i know: c'est ~~problématique~~#but look. I'm from a racially diverse family okay?#my dad's side especially. nobody over there stuck to their own race/ethnic group #my parents are a mixed couple. i know how hard it is to make that work.#most interracial couples I'd seen on tv until that point were very...chaste?#mostly played for laughs (oh haha the cultural dissonance is so cute and funny!) or worse: to play up racial sterotypes #but to see one depicted as a straight-forward romance- as two people deeply in love and not played for a gag? AND as the core of the story?#mannnn that means a lot to me even all these years later #so yeah im deep in the 'hunting down feel-good fix-it fics' phase wish me luck

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vampirepunks · 1 month

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Higgs Monaghan's MBTI + Enneagram Typology (pt. 2)

(disclaimer: this is my opinion based on deep character study, eight or so years of special interest in typology, and subjective interpretation. if you wanna argue, good luck finding my PDB. friendly debate is fine.)

MBTI: ENTP (Ne-Ti-Fe-Si)

Enneagram: 7w8

Instinctual Variant: sx/sp

Tritype: 782

(part one: mbti deep dive)

(Sam analysis)

As an ENTP, Higgs is right at home in enneagram 7. However, he's an interesting flavor of ENTP 7, due to his sexual instinctual variant, 8 wing + secondary fix, and emotional center in 2. Let's start with the basics.

Enneagram 7 Overview Basic Fear: Of being deprived and trapped in pain Basic Desire: To be happy, satisfied, to find fulfillment Fixation: Planning Trap: Idealism Passion: Gluttony

Deprived and trapped in pain, huh? Considering Higgs' backstory as an abused child locked away from the outside world, forcefully told there was no life outside the four walls of his home, denied the ability to explore and discover, punished for basic curiosity, this makes perfect sense. Higgs experienced extreme repression of his natural instincts, denial of his basic emotional and psychological needs, and had no means to escape the constant abuse he suffered. Remember, the common belief is that one's MBTI type is innate, while enneagram theory hinges on the acquisition of negative traits stemming from warped self-beliefs manifested by the impact of inevitable social oppression and possibly even trauma. The enneagram dips closer to psychology and sociology than MBTI (still pseudoscience tho, Naranjo was a hack and is very worthy of criticism) and thus is a lot more logical in its foundations. Hence, I strongly believe that any MBTI type can be any enneagram, due to the breadth of human experience, it's just a matter of conflicting cognition and instincts. Don't fight me on this one, y'all, I'm working on my sociology B.A., I can go back and forth all day about this stuff. I'm gonna get banned from PDB any day now for the arguments I get into.

It's not hard to understand why "be happy and fulfilled" became the crux of Higgs' pursuits. Enneagram 7 takes this most basic human desire, "be happy," and crafts it into an obsession. Until they overcome their fix and passion, 7 will never be satisfied. (cough cough, intelligent eyes in a hunger-pang frame... ahem. sorry, sorry, something stuck in my throat there. moving on.)

Enneagram 7 treats life as one grand stage, where anything can happen if you just want it badly enough. Thus, 7 is hedonistic, rebellious, undisciplined in one way or another, driven towards wish fulfillment, egotistical, persuasive, and extremely seductive, with some variants of 7 exhibiting charlatanism and fraudulence.

Sexual 7

Instinctual variants are the result of the enneagram type's passion invading an area of the social life and self, dominating its expression. There are three realms here: sexual (not always explicitly in the adult sense, this refers to one-on-one relationships, intimacy, etc), social, and self-preservation.

So, obviously sexual 7 is the result of gluttony + the sexual instinct. sx7 traits include: talkativeness, grandiosity and exaggeration, exhibitionism of personality and style, invasive tendencies, brazen audacity, obliviousness, magical thinking, relationship difficulties, self-indulgence, hypersensitivity, anti-hierarchical escapism, and intolerance for frustration.

Put simply, sx7 has their head in the clouds. Ichazo nicknamed this subtype "suggestibility." Although I really dislike Naranjo, he made an excellent point when he said, "The sexual seven is not earthly, but heavenly. He is not interested in the things of this world. It is the gluttony of the things of a higher and more advanced world. The sexual E7 is what we could call a dreamer[...] His passion is to dream, to go towards the sweetness of the imagined instead of contacting the ordinary and not so interesting reality."

Higgs is a showman. He paints everything in metaphor, in literature, in poetry, in history, in performances and masks and shadow theater. When captured in the literal view, Higgs' life is one tragedy after another, with no rhyme or reason, no grand answer to "why me," no satisfying conclusion to make an adoring audience cry for him. In the meta, fourth-wall breaking sense, the player becomes that for him. He looks us in the eye and asks, "Isn't this what you've been waiting for this whole time?" and prances around putting on a good show as we give him the attention and recognition he craves; we observe, we react, and a few of us see him. For a few moments, we live in his tragedy, we smile at his one-liners, we laugh at his bad behavior, and in those precious moments, he isn't alone. He's still at it, winking at the camera in the DS2 trailer when he quips about porters having to pull the trigger sometimes, a sly little, "I know what you did. You're not better than me. You get it."

But let's peel back that layer. Higgs is a mask. Let's talk about Peter.

Yeah, Peter, who was destroyed time and time again by his stubborn drive to believe, no matter how many times it got him hurt, nearly killed, even. Peter, who believed his way into stepping into a new world with a new sky. Peter, who believed his way into becoming a terrorist. Peter, who believed his way into Amelie's puppet master hands. Peter, who believed until the moment the carrot was snatched away and he met the stick face-first. Peter, the child whose only crime was being curious, became a grown man with his dreams shattered entire, with no innocence left to call his own, no one to save him, and no way out. So what was there to do but construct new dreams, nightmares made ideal, to build anew an image of himself as "the bridge that brings the extinction" in service of a greater power? Dreamer turned apostle, Saint Peter having the faith that he could walk on water. Except Amelie didn't pull him out when he sank. (Sam did, but that's a completely different conversation.)

Higgs built up a world of magic, because his real life was tragic, and in the end, Amelie forced him to bury the castle.

sx7 traps themselves in false hope, breezing through the world with witty speeches, talking, talking, talking, coasting by on charm and an energetic demeanor to mask their anxiety. This is right at home in the possibility-obsessed, silver-tongued ENTP, but the sensitivities of sx7 soften the ENTP personality quite a bit, amplifying their vulnerabilities and making them all too easy to manipulate. This is a personality that needs someone to protect them, and to teach them to protect themselves, which Higgs never had. Coffin tried, but fate had other ideas, and she became another loss upon his shoulders.

Self-Preservation 7 (secondary)

Now, on PDB, almost everyone has voted Higgs as sx/so, and I get why, but I believe Higgs is very social-blind and not countertype. The last instinct in a stack is a personality's blind spot, their weak point, the thing they struggle with, try to ignore, and overcompensate for. For Higgs, that's the social instinct. The self-pres and social instincts are conflated a lot in 7, due to this type’s inherent need for outward validation; their cool exterior conceals fear of inferiority and deprivation. 7 is arguably the most extroverted of the enneagram thus their self-preservation needs are heavily dependent on the presence of other people and having a clear role within a group. They often create family units and can appear similar to the so8 via their proclivity for creating a “tribe” for themselves, a group they nurture and in turn are protected by. Thus, sp7s are characterized as defenders in spite of their obvious self-interest. sx/sp 7s are often warm, charismatic people. Combined with an 8 fix, they're quite intense. In a well-read ENTP, this is a personality that could sell ice in the Arctic, and people gravitate towards their ability to sell their dream. "Together, we'll carry packages from sea to shining sea."

Many of Higgs’ deeper issues can be explained through the aforementioned developed Fe + social-blindness + a 2 fix in his emotional center. Having grown up completely isolated from the world, there’s no way he could be anything but soc-blind. His self-sacrifice is cognitive compensation for social deficiency and expression of a moral righteousness generated by his sx7-driven idealism, not an instinctual social egotism and rejection of gluttony. More on this when we get to his 2 fix. sp7 is the closest of the 7 variants to the literal definition of gluttony. They yearn for indulgence in every way.

Now, let's talk about that 8 wing and tritype secondary fix

Enneagram 8 is known for its aggression before all else, and it has a strong pull on any personality that has it in their wing or tritype. The 7w6 is flighty, much more risk-averse, and they work to satisfy their gluttony by seducing others into feeding their cravings for them, holding back to explore all possibilities, and they seek assurance that they're making the right choices, whereas 7w8 knows what they want and they'll take it if they have to. The 8 wing adds a heavy-handed, decisive edge to the 7 personality; 7w6 pushes back when the world closes in on them, 7w8 pushes forward against the world to make sure they're never restricted to begin with. Thus, the sx7 with an 8 wing displays much more sexual aggression (licking people!) and is inclined to show dominance. They're self-protective, they don't like to share their toys, and they won't let anyone take what's theirs. See: "gonna make [Sam] regret ever fucking with me and mine." This makes the 7w8 a powerful protector, a fierce enemy... and a nervous wreck prone to covering up fear with violence, anger, and provocation. This sort of aggression is a tendency in the standard 7w8, but with an 8 fix added to the tritype, it becomes a leading trait. This is particularly interesting in an ENTP, as they aren't typically aggressive by nature; they seek conflict for entertainment's sake, without malice, looking to test people and expand their own worldview through discourse. The ENTP 7w8 with an 8 tritype fix, on the other hand, takes up stronger convictions, greater stubbornness, and an impatience for people who won't bend to their whims. They often go looking to convince people they're right, getting frustrated when they aren't heard. ("You just don't get it, do you?") Further, when 8 invades the sexual instinct, secondary to a 7 fix, you get a personality that wants to possess the hearts and minds of their closest loved ones, fears abandonment, would die to protect one of their own, and knows better than to bite the hand that feeds.

Finally, the tertiary 2 fix

Enneagram 2 is a nurturer. 2 generously gives of themselves, constantly fixating on everyone else's needs. This is a personality that would give another person the shirt off their own back if they asked. Important thing to understand: their help isn't free. They might say it is, but 2 unconsciously expects to be rewarded and praised for helping others. Overall, this fits well with Higgs' secondary instinctual alignment in sp7. 7 fears being deprived, while 2 fears that no one appreciates them, and they mask this insecurity with a show of humility and an insistence that they were merely doing the right thing. They reason that if they meet everyone else's needs, their own needs will be taken care of in reciprocity. Meanwhile, they minimize those needs, making themselves as small and convenient as possible, denying they have needs at all. With an sx/sp alignment and a secondary 8 fix, this becomes a push-pull internal conflict between "I don't need anything, really" and "Give me what I need or else." I firmly believe that part of why Higgs' betrayal of Fragile was so malicious was a subconscious urge to punish her for not being... you guessed it... what he needed.

Let's go back to the point from post no. 1 about Higgs having highly developed Fe. In his youth, every time Higgs found himself in a new social situation, he responded with skepticism and instinctual aversion to social connection. It took time and persuasion for him to warm up to the idea of group politics; he’s only convinced when he realizes he’s needed and stands to have his own needs fulfilled in turn. Most people try to place Higgs' emotional center in enneagram 4 (which, when modulated by the sx-instinct and an 8 wing, can get downright nasty due to the fixation with envy and the aggression of 8) but frankly... I think that's lazy analysis.

Higgs’ initial reluctance to accept his DOOMS for what it was and subsequent secretiveness about killing to maintain it for his own survival screams 2. Higgs doesn’t self-victimize or wish to be special. Rather, he conceals his own needs and justifies his actions through a belief that he’s undertaking a selfless path. (“I’m an altruist now, I live to help other people[…] Community’s what it’s all about.”) He needs the world to need him and deteriorates when his role is threatened. In his time leading the West, people loved him and relied on him, but that wasn’t enough for him. Because he’s soc-blind and sx-dom, he only feels truly seen, fulfilled, and appreciated when he has attention and approval through a one-on-one relationship, such as with Coffin, Fragile, Amelie, etc., and he obsessively pursues the same recognition from Sam. (It’s worth acknowledging this is also indicative of disordered attachment, anxious-avoidant type.) When he fails, he falls back on the self-pres instinct, so… pizza, anyone?

Amelie initially lured him with the deceptive promise of enough power to create the better, freer, fairer world he was striving for. In his mind: save the world = save himself. Can’t save the world? Can’t save himself, time to take the whole thing down with him and call it mercy. That’s an unhealthy 2 heart center, believing he can only meet his own needs by rescuing everyone else, projecting his own turmoil onto others. He convinces himself he’s doing the right thing, giving the world what it needs. While his thirst for wide-scale justice is genuine, he exhibits an intense craving for attention, intimacy, and recognition, becoming suddenly naive and vulnerable when someone offers what he lacks. Conversely, he’s antagonistic, aloof, aggressive, and ego-defensive when his needs are denied or threatened.

Conclusion

Higgs' most basic of needs were denied from a young age, and as an ENTP, he's inherently driven to hedonism, has a need for an intellectual playmate/trustworthy equal, and craves a balance between novelty and safety, so he’s gluttonous towards intimate relationships and a sense of security. His sx7 alignment means he dreams big and loud, constructing kingdoms in his mind and a personal narrative where he's the hero in shining armor, free to explore the world as he wishes and save it while he's at it. His sp7 secondary means he thirsts for his own means of survival and the assurance of it, going out of his way to endear himself to others and become indispensable to guarantee that survival. His 8 fix means he's assertive, strong-willed, aggressively self-protective, and highly possessive of anything he views as "belonging" to him. His 2 fix means he needs others to need him, needs to feel important in his loved ones' lives, needs to have his efforts rewarded, needs a larger role to fulfill, and most of all, needs to know that he's allowed to need things. As an sx7, he's comfortable with wanting things, but that 2 fix means needs are unacceptable for him to express.

Becoming Higgs—embodying a self-righteous, pharaoh-inspired persona—was the only way he could cope with the injustice and deprivation he suffered. (Coffin: “There was such a fear in him, but beneath that a terrible anger[…] That poor boy…”)

Mature-but-unhealthy ENTP 782 at its finest. Feet on the ground, head in the clouds. In conclusion, I want to fuck him so bad it makes me look stupid. What a man.

#literally obsessed with the fact that he has the exact mirror of my personality type #intj: ni-te-fi-se. entp: ne-ti-fe-si. alter egos. he's 7w8 i'm 8w7. he's soc-blind and i'm soc-dom. so on so forth #i could fix him and he could make me worse <3 #to sum up: this is a horse girl movie and i imagine myself to be The Special Girl who's the only one that can ride (😏😏😏) the wild stallion #i'm delulu about it actually. very fun. highly recommend. but watch out it'll hurt your sanity forever and people will def look at u funny #:)))))))#✨✨self-awareness✨✨#mbti #enneagram #personality typology #character study #entp #higgs monaghan #death stranding #logan.txt

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the-magpie-archives · 1 year

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The thing about blood is that once you've seen it you can never really get it out. It has a tendancy to linger, to drip into those places impossible to reach, a slow unnoticeable movement breaking its stagnation. Even if you think you've got all of it, chances are you haven't. The smell lingers, a sickly sweet fuzzy smell tinged with iron that somehow sticks in the back of your throat.

Imagine how much blood there was when Jared Hopworth attacked the institute. We know the boneturner is capable of removing bones with no blood at all but why would he when what he wants to cause is fear? He says that they undid the institute staff for parts, so I'd say they took a hell of a lot more than bones.

That's not to mention Melanie's attack with the knife, God knows how much blood Jared and his "perfect" friends had in their eldritch bodies, but if that knife hurt I'm willing to bet that blood was spilled. A lot of blood.

There's something uncanny about a place where something that awful's happened. Something in the foundations of the place. In a place with a history as messy as the institute I'm sure there was always something on the air, but that amount of bloodshed never really fades.

Even if you can't see or smell it I think there's something in the soul that knows it. Growing up there was a small park near where I lived, I always knew of it, walked past it, but never once had any desire to go near it. I don't know if I avoided it, but I never wanted to go into it. I found out a few years back that a girl died there. I won't go into detail but it was the kind of death that leaves that mark, and when I did eventually end up in that park the weight in the air was palpable.

I wonder if Jon could feel that sense of something when he came back to the institute after his coma. Does otherworldly sight stretch into the realms of the metaphysical? Could he see the residual fear of an entity so different to his own lingering in dark corners and clinging to his coworkers? Or could he simply sense it, that slight wrongness that would be so easy to attribute to being away for so long.

Jon didn't get a warm welcome, and perhaps he returned to a place that didn't even feel like the prison it'd been before. There's a comfort in the horrors we face daily, and even positive changes can make it feel even worse than it did before. The behaviour of his friends changed so much, and somehow so did the behaviour of his workplace.

It begs the question, is it better to know or to be oblivious? To be blind or to seek knowledge relentlessly? That feeling, that slight instinct that something happened here, there's something to know; how could one bear that after six months of knowing nothing real at all? Jon didn't know about the attack, and him knowing didn't help, but did he feel it? Was it there in that sea of knowledge the whole time but he couldn't bring himself to reach out and grasp it?

Because the thing with blood is that it lingers, and once you smell it, it never really goes away.

#Tma is a podcast so naturally I'm obsessed with the unspoken elements of it... Often the absence is more important than the presence #There's so many things that couldn't be said and episodes can only be so long so things like this show up in my brain #I just find blood fascinating in literature (and in reality of course) ‚ anything that literally fuels human life is an excellent metaphor #And it's so beautifully perverted by the flesh. So much of the flesh is about beauty and perfection #But as an audience we're never really drawn to agree or sympathise in a meaningful way #Which is actually really cool and I'll probably write a post about that one day #Anyways let me stop rambling in the tags. It's 1am and I'm not even sure the post makes sense! The tags needn't be worse.#tma #the magnus archives #the magnus institute #jonathan sims #jared hopworth #tma the flesh #melanie king #tma season 4 #tma the slaughter #Oh god now the trigger warnings #tw blood #tw death mention #tw death #tw injury #tw knife #tw violence #tw horror #Okay I think that's enough. As always if you think of any more let me know!

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