#and eventually I did get my own ipad and apple pencil!

[miss-nichita]

Posted 9/3/18

"This summer...was a struggle. Honestly I’ve been working at day camp for too long and it really sucks the energy out of ya after spending 8 weeks with kids 😅 I had zero inspiration this summer which really is a bummer for me. Next year will be totally different hopefully. On a lighter note, my friend let me draw on her iPad with her Apple Pen! I 👏🏼 LOVED 👏🏼 IT 👏🏼 Honestly I wish I also had them so I could do more digital art but ALAS. So because my friend is so awesome she let me draw my cat, Leo, in his older age~~"

#and eventually I did get my own ipad and apple pencil! #I'm still thankful #nichi oc #oc #leo #nichi doodles

[milli-moi]

Sad times. Very sad times. 😥

Story time:

I began drawing digitally on my phone about three years ago. It wasn’t easy and I only really imported line art and used the software to colour and make it fancy. I decided after deliberating a lot that it made sense to get an iPad and Apple Pencil. I got some of it paid for Christmas and I paid the rest. Since getting my pencil and iPad my drawing has transformed. I am able to create better things which take longer and would be much harder to create without the layering tools. I have also become used to using reference images to trace the line work which is probably not the best idea but it opened up a lot of things I otherwise wouldn’t be drawing. I’ve barely drawn on paper for a while now, again probably not the best but it helps set the stage.

Despite a case and a tempered glass screen protector my iPad screen got a crack right across it. I thought the crack was in the screen protector only to find when I went to change the protector that it actually had cracked the screen. I was devastated, obviously drawing on the screen would add pressure to the crack and eventually cause permanent damage. Apple suggests using one of their specific repair places but a screen repair from them would cost almost as much as getting a new, older generation iPad (£270).

I eventually followed my dad’s advise and got a new screen put on from a phone/iPad repair place which had very good reviews etc. It cost me £80.

I was so happy to get my iPad back, so relieved that I was going to be able to carry on with the art I have had in progress for a while and just to have the ability to work the same way once again.

Then I discovered the pencil no longer worked properly. After some research I discovered that the only way that an iPad could have a screen replacement which didn’t effect the pressure sensors for the pencil was if the screen was ‘cannibalised’ from another iPad. So it basically would be a bit dodgy.

My Mum, understanding how devastating this is for me at the moment, has agreed to do the same as I did with my first iPad, allowing me to buy half of it and she will pay the rest for my birthday but I wouldn’t have to wait for my birthday to get a new one. It would of course be cheaper this time as the pencil is perfectly fine and I will sell my original iPad as it works perfectly for someone who doesn’t need the pencil capabilities.

However I am in limbo at the moment, I can’t exactly ask my parents to speed up the process of getting me a new one as this is partly a present and they are being really nice in agreeing to do this. But I feel so lost and sad without my iPad.

I have plans to make a calendar, which I also hope I will be able to sell, but of course I would need to have the art all ready to go by probably late October in order to get the word out and get them selling. The plan was to do a modern more MCU- like take on the marvel swimsuit edition of many years ago. I also planned to try and sell the calendar as a physical copy and also as a pdf so that people would not have to pay for shipping etc if they didn’t want to.

I am simply a sad bean until I get it back and am having my eyes open to how much I have come to rely on my iPad for drawing more so than games/watching stuff/random video making etc. Having both Dyspraxia and ADHD (and asd but those two are the most relevant here) I am very accustomed to breaking stuff, no matter how important it is to me anything I own is at risk by clumsiness and forgetfulness combined.

Regardless of all of my sadness in this post I thought I might share some of my almost finished images for the calendar to try and get some people interested (maybe) and to cheer myself up.

#black widow #natasha romanoff #natalia romanova #marvel #buckynat #mcu #marvel fanart #fanart #fanart calendar #avengers swimsuit edition #swimsuit edition redo #my art stuff #steve rogers #captain america #Thor #thor odinson #beach #avengers holidays #sad me #RIP ipad #I miss drawing

[fmp2zarafuller]

I was going to do cinema 4D in Chris’ lesson but I felt terrible over lunch so I went home. But Friday I gave Blender a go on my own laptop since the app I had kept crashing. And I just ran into so many issues. It started with the fact I didn’t have enough storage to even download anything so thankfully my sibling is very good at tech issues and fixed it all and got Blender downloaded. I then had the issue because I don’t have a pc and an old mac with old apple software I couldn’t download the newest version so then I had to find the older version of Blender to download which was going okay until it was very laggy. I think it’s a mix of old Blender and an old laptop. It was so slow I would move my view position and it would have such a long delay to catch up I was kind of getting frustrated by this so I just decided I’m just going to have to work with what I’ve got on my Ipad. I did learn a bunch on Blender though with shortcuts and lots of youtube tutorials. I also learnt that because I was working with a laptop I don’t have the extras a mouse would allow for so I had to search how to change the user settings. I’m not very technically smart when it comes to this kind of thing but eventually I got the hang of it but the lag was becoming to frustrating to continue. 

My plan now is to go take a bunch of screenshots of the rabbit model I made on shapeyard incase it stops working altogether and I can’t even get onto the app. Then just post them on to procreate to try and edit and move about to colour and light. Play about with making the drugged out looking version. I was planning to have the whole thing 3D background and props but now I’m considering because I’ve run into a bunch of problems trying to go completely 3D with it I may adapt and give the backdrop and props a hand drawn feel. Maybe play on a little bit of a pencil watercolour affect. I actually think it’d be fun to play about with merging the two styles. I think it gives a childish look with pencil, watercolour and paint but I think it leans into the idea and emphasises this character is part of kids tv and is supposed to be child friendly. So when you flip to the other side it’s more alarming to see. 

[same-side]

Hey so I hope this is ok to ask, but how did you improve your art so quickly? I haven't been drawing as consistently as I could have, but I'm not progressing as quickly as I'd like lol Anyway I hope this is ok to ask; if it's not clear from the ask you're my favorite dbh artist btw Also thank you for drawing, your art is amazing

Hey there! Thank you so much! <3

Before I get into this, I have many other answered questions like this one that you might find helpful! I tag all of my art advice with #art-reference . Now:

Honestly, someone can give you all the advice in the world, but there’s no substitute for time! I get this question a lot (sometimes even with really mean comments) and I think people just don’t understand that it doesn’t come out of nowhere. For the first maybe year and a half of this blog, I was drawing for upwards of 7 or 8 hours a day. I was drawing so much that I gave myself carpal tunnel. Obviously I’m not telling you to go that far - that’s neither healthy nor reasonable for most people. But consistently drawing- even for thirty minutes five times a week - will give you a lot of improvement. Consistency and time are the biggest keys to improvement with anything - art, sports, whatever it may be. I wouldn’t be anywhere near where I am right now if I hadn’t been drawing so much every day. Now I no longer have the time (and sometimes, the motivation) to draw often, and I can certainly tell that my skills have attrophied. It’s a process and a cycle! Just try to stay consistent and put a time into it and you’ll see improvement.

Some other things that help:

Study the works of artists you like, and apply that to your own art.

This doesn’t mean copy another artist style, and certainly don’t copy their work. But analyze elements of their work - figure out what you like about it. Is it the vibrant colors? The visible brush strokes? The way they draw the gleam on the eyes? Perhaps it’s the line thickness. Whatever those elements are, try to apply them to your own work, and figure out what you like and don’t like, what comes naturally and what doesn’t.

Do studies

Whether it’s a photorealistic painting, or turning a photo into a cartoon, try to do studies. They’ll teach you important lessons about lighting, composition, anatomy, and expressions

Use references

If you don’t know what something looks like, don’t just make it up! Use a reference. Eventually, you’ll internalize how fabric folds or anatomy works by using references.

Change your software, hardware, or brushes

I’m always reluctant to note this one, but it does make a difference. The reason for my reluctance is that I think all too often new artists think that it’s the tablet or the program or the brush that makes the art good. That’s entirely untrue and it’s a terrible trap. What’s more important is knowing how to use the tools at your disposal. What I mean by this is understanding that the direction and size of your brushstrokes is important, not just the texture of the brush itself.

That being said, it does make a difference. There were basically two drastic steps in my art, in my opinion. The first was when I realized my program had brushes besides the most basic hard brush. I had no opacity, no flow, and no blending. Up until that point all my art looked like this:

I switched to using soft, blending brushes, and some textured brushes, and it made a tremendous difference.

Then, I switched my hardware and software. I went from using an old Wacom tablet and 2008 stripped down photoshop to using procreate on iPad with Apple Pencil. This gave my a new range of brushes to try for a more painterly style, and most importantly I had pen pressure now. Additionally, it’s good to note that using a plug in tablet to a monitor results in difficulty with getting strokes perfectly angled (like trying to touch your nose by looking in the mirror) and parallax. Using a palmpad style tablet eliminates that.

I hope that helps. Again, I have a lot more advice in that tag. Try to remember that art is always a learning process, and you don’t see a lot of the behind the scenes. For every piece an artist posts, there’s probably ten more that they didn’t like and deleted. You see your own mistakes, but you don’t see theirs, so naturally you unfairly compare yourself.

Remember to take time to draw if you want to improve, it’s the most important thing.

#art reference #t talks #asks for ts

[uniformbravo]

having a full on existential crisis over an episode of anime i watched tonight

it all started with big time rush

in 2009 a sitcom called big time rush aired for the first time on nickelodeon; it was about a group of four teenaged boys from minnesota who move to hollywood under a famous producer to become his next big boy band sensation. a simple premise, launched into unprecedented success, resulting in four seasons of musical shenanigans, three full music albums, and three big concert tours, including international shows. the band, both fictional and real life, featured four attractive young men by the names of kendall, james, carlos, and logan. they quickly gained a fan base of mostly teenage girls, which resulted in online spaces created for the purpose of sharing their passion, and as is common in such online communities, this certainly involved fanfiction- lots of it.

enter me, a teen in high school who loved to write fanfiction. my big time journey began the day my younger sister decided to put on the show big time rush in the living room, where i sat at the family computer typing away. the noise caught my attention, and i got sucked into the episode. there was a boy wearing a dress on the screen. i became interested.

i watched more of the show. i typed its name into the search bar on the website fanfiction dot net. i had a friend at school who shared my interest in fanfiction, particularly of the slash variety. i introduced her to this new show i had been watching. she shared a fanfic she had enjoyed immensely with me. we dragged each other into the world of big time rush fanfiction reading and writing.

it took over my life; i lived and breathed big time rush. i began posting my own stories to fanfiction dot net. i received positive feedback; i met people. i made friends- two people in particular who became very close friends. we communicated through ffn’s private messaging system, then through email. we talked every day, we wrote stories for and with each other, we exchanged phone numbers. it was one of these friends who introduced me to the website called tumblr, where fellow fans of our beloved big time rush gathered and talked about it- a community.

it was a slow start- this website was new and unfamiliar to me- but eventually i got the hang of things and settled into my niche. i had fun, gained followers, met even more people. tumblr was a place not only for sharing one singular interest, but for accumulating all of your various interests and celebrating them in one place. it was through this aspect that i first learned of the up and coming band known as one direction.

they had released their first smash hit single and everyone was talking about it. i was wary, far too loyal to my beloved big time rush- but eventually i started to feel left out and in an effort to feel included, i decided to take the plunge and see what this “1d” was all about. it was intimidating, though- there was so much information, and no apparent beginner’s guide to tell me where to start. this drove me to making a post calling for a “one direction buddy” to take this role, to introduce me to all the most important aspects of this band. and my call was answered.

enter my wonderful friend cam, a follower of mine at the time. they were into both big time rush and one direction and were eager to provide me with all the information needed to get into 1d. while ultimately this venture didn’t amount to anything, as i lost interest in becoming a fan, my friendship with cam persisted and we grew very close. even as time went on and big time rush faded into the background to be replaced with newer, fresher interests, and our paths as fellow fandom members split, we kept in contact and remained friends. years and years of fandoms, years and years of friendship.

in the midst of the tenth year, cam developed a new interest, in a sport called ice hockey. as is tradition, they shared their passion with me, showing me their favorite team, highlighting their favorite members. we watched a game together. personally, i’ve never been one for sports, but i am quite into anime, which consists of many genres, including the “sports” genre. one in particular that i’ve enjoyed immensely in the past is the volleyball anime, haikyuu!!. this anime devotes a lot of time to explaining and depicting the sport in a way that makes it easy for any viewer to understand the rules and inner workings of volleyball. it’s exciting. it’s the first time i’ve ever even adjacently been invested in a sport. one could even call it a gateway into the world of sports.

all this to say, when i watched that game of ice hockey with cam, the same parts of my brain that loved haikyuu!! lit up and in a classic display of my specific brand of interest, i found myself yearning for the epic highs and lows of ice hockey, but in an animated format. an animated format originating in japan. a japanese animation. an anime. my curiosity burned a hole in my brain that resulted in a combination of the google search bar and the words, “hockey anime”.

to my disappointment, i found nothing- at least, not to the degree i was hoping. there is an upcoming anime, slated to air in the fall 2021 anime season, about a group of girls who form an ice hockey team together- as it is an original project rather than an adaptation, it remains to be seen whether the anime will fall into the category of “sports anime,” or if indeed it will lean much more closely to the “moe” genre. the latter is not what i had in mind during that particular search.

adding the anime called “pride of orange” to my “plan to watch” list on myanimelist dot com, i moved onto the next result: an article about an early 2010’s anime i had never heard of before. while not about the sport i was looking for, it featured a character whose signature weapon was a field hockey stick. it wasn’t even the right sport. it was a weak, insignificant link, but all was not lost.

i happen to have an affinity for watching anime i happen upon completely by random and know little to nothing about; i found the movie “anthem of the heart” purely coincidentally, when i searched the name “jun” as part of some research for one of my original characters and discovered that it was the main character of said movie, which i then watched and ended up enjoying quite a lot. another time, when i was at best buy one day i happened upon a dvd on their dedicated anime shelf for a movie called “hana and alice”, which i had never heard of before. i liked the box art, so i took a picture of it to remember the title and watched it on my own later that week; it became one of my favorite movies.

with these and other similar experiences in mind, i saved the anime in my “plan to watch” list, and, later that same week, began my watch of “sket dance.”

it’s a school comedy anime, one of my favorite genres, so it’s no surprise that after overcoming the initial skepticism i carry into every new show i watch it quickly became my new fixation. not an obsession, but something i was pleasantly surprised to find consistently enjoyable. the characters are fun, the humor is tight and fresh, and the stories are unexpectedly touching at the right moments. everything i like to see.

which brings us to tonight. the culmination of this ten plus year string of events and occurrences. getting into big time rush. joining tumblr. meeting cam. watching anime. searching for hockey anime.

i put down my apple(TM) pencil. i set my ipad aside. i downsized the ebook window i’d been referencing. i stretched; i was hungry and tired. i’d been rereading passages of various animorphs books all day. i needed a break. i needed to sit back with some food and an episode of my latest comfort watch, sket dance. it’d be nice to set the dramatic, tragic world of animorphs aside for something lighthearted and fun in its place.

well.

i sat down with my bowl of strawberries and played the episode. it finished. i watched another. this one broke the formula a bit, played with the art style. i was into it. the preview for the next episode was mysteriously blank, and short, stating only the title. it was intriguing. i’m down for the show to get a bit more serious for an episode, i thought. i’m down for some potential backstory for one of the main three. i’m ready.

i was not ready.

bruh.

b r u h .

next two episodes proceeded to take me out back and beat me to within an inch of my life, slowly at first and then all at once. barely made it out alive. questioning everything. how can a show, so silly and goofy, do that, to me. how could i let my guard down like that. how could i be so tricked, and deceived, and blindsided like this. i don’t know who to trust. i don’t know if i can trust again. whiplash so damaging, permanent. i thought i wanted answers. i thought i wanted to know backstory. i didn’t want this. i never wanted this. emptiness

how did it come to this, these twelve years of my life. had i known back then, would i have posted that fanfiction? would i have joined tumblr? would i have sook out a “one direction buddy”? a hollow husk of a person, i am left with only my thoughts to ponder this small history of mine. the things i could have done differently. the things others could have done differently. all these butterfly effect moments, adding up to what? culminating in what? it’s 2:26 am and i’m writing an essay on how shook i am over that episode instead of going to sleep. but i can’t just say nothing, you know? i need to put something out there, reach deep enough within myself to find the thing that’s still there, broken and huddled and tiny as it is. i need to feel some semblance of the self again. the me from before i watched this episode. the innocent version of myself, blissful in ignorance. it’s too late now.

that episode…………..was fucked up. that was seriously fucked up. im not okay bro they really just came in left field and slapped that in my face expecting me to get up and walk away just fine afterwards like No that isn’t how this Works y’all need to bundle some therapy sessions with ur episodes pullin that shit come ON

exhaustion is taking over the shock, i am simply tired now. i will fall asleep and when i wake up sket dance will be a happy fun show again with NO fucked up backstories ever Or Else. i’m fucking serious right now i’m gonna count to 3 and that shit better be retconned when i turn around,

screams

thank you

#tldr sket dance has some really fucked up shit in it & i wasn’t expecting it & im having a crisis #it was supposed to be funnie clown show not ouchie oof show #how did it end up like this #fuck. christ. what the fuck #retag later #ani blogging #me watchin this show: yea this is fun like idk if i see myself getting /invested/ invested but i’m enjoying myself nonetheless! #gets to That Episode: …../oh./ oh i /see./ we’re doing That Shit huh #*sound of me getting /invested/ invested* #just a neat lil show about funy jokes :) #wheeeeeeee

[thesleepingbinch]

🥄🥄🥄

N O !

-Harrods? When? Have I, has the enterity of London – nay, the UK – unbeknowest of ourselves delighted in Certified Noob® Baked Goods? Världen är  p y t t e l i t e n  my fellow Barbarian. ‘Tis sad that you’re not there now.**    **(b/c #fikagoshdarnit!)

Ah, thanks a munch for clueing me in on The Spoon Theory as it applies here: units of energy-per-activity. Interesting. So, how many spoons do you have today? (And are they full of sugar, …or sourdough?) The whole low 🥄-status > doc > FK > managing basic life™ > lower 🥄-status > ♻ … Can’t imagine the added stress. Hopefully the doc<>FK correlation can solve that bit, at least (?). It should feel nice to know that you can start living and take steps forward in life, no?

Speaking of which; what would you like to do now moving forward (aside from nimble  b o i s)? You are obviously creative – and doing creative shenanigans should have positive effects on spoon status, right? Bonus: they are allowed to take however much time they take.

Getting out of your 🥄drawer now. Hope you’ve had a nice Midsommarhelg with the Noob Fam and given the chance to replenish the happy feels! :)

Love, W

*(Ps. did you get the card recs? No need to pub. Just checking, since Tumblr is a little godisgris, munching on asks & subs. Ds.)

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ah, Raring Wemps! So I am finally sitting down to reply to this lovely master post after the longest wait in history! (I do feel better knowing you’ve been diving into the ocean and living in #smultronsnåret, can’t get better than that, can it?). Grab a cup of coffee and get comfortable because this will be quite the long read (förlåt).

It was a long time ago since I was in London. 2012 to be precise. It’s high up on my list of places to get back to (for living) once I get better and start getting all this illness stuff under control (DoucheDoc™ laughed when he asked me what my goal was and I bluntly said ‘To get good enough to get the fuck out of here and go back to exploring the world’. Admitting he couldn’t help me with that right now, he did say he appreciated the answer). However, my invitation for fresh sea delicacies if you’d ever come a little south of that N60° border is still open. 

Sadly the doc >> FK mess is getting even deeper. The “doctor” FK turns to for consultation when the medical issues exceed the normal levels they are used to seem to have absolutely no idea what ME/CFS is and is suggesting I am ill because I am inactive (while my specialist doctor think I am already almost doing too much for my condition before we have managed to find that fine line where it goes from being ok to too much), and need exercise therapy - something my specialist clinic doesn’t even offer because it has a higher rate of making people sicker than better. So things are gonna go further, we’re getting ready to make an appeal on their ruling, and I am just completely drained already. So things have not been looking great in this department - but I’ve managed to take some time off to be by the salty sea and watching horror movies until the morning light is coming up again with dear FreshNoob friends so even though one side of my life seem to be crashing and burning, it’s not all dark and dreadful! 

Creative things do have a MAJOR positive effect on both mood and in a sense my spoons as well (or rather, it is spoons well spent, if you catch my drift?). I am working on identifying what kind of things drain me of spoons and what could possibly give me some spoons or which - at the very least - give me a very positive emotional payoff doing. I am looking for ways to get my hands on an iPad Pro and Apple Pencil (my god why are they so expensive? :sweat: ), because that way I can bring my creative stuff with me everywhere and even do it on bed on the days when I am feeling too rough to do much. It could also serve as a smaller side income, selling prints and such, eventually ... so this is really an option I am looking into! 

Also, I absolutely LOVED your tarot suggestions, tack så hemskt mycket raring! And I did both laugh and get a little frustrated because the top deck you suggested (Jolandas) ... I already own. I just can’t find it. It’s a funny story, I went into her little shop in Gamla stan as a wee little 14-15ish year old Fresh Noob (so REALLY fresh) looking to dive into this mysterious world, and I got it and she signed the book for me (Krax pax!). I’ve been looking for this deck for months now, but I can’t find it. I’m scared one of my mum’s ex’s got it with him taking his stuff from the basement (a moment of silence, please ...). 

I’ve also already been throwing some serious eyes on The Wild Unknown deck, I love the colour bursts in it and the overall simple design is really appealing. I have had some mixed feelings wondering if perhaps it’s a little too simplistic and will be hard for someone new like me - but then, maybe I have enough creativity in my head to fill out the picture myself. A huge plus is that it’s fairly inexpensive to get as well (we really stan that at the moment with thet FK struggle!).

Scouting the vast interwebs trying to find a tarot deck for my dear Bästis after she expressed interest in getting one herself after seeing my deck on the table, I did stumble upon a real masterpiece though. I mean, it was love at first sight, I am obsessed. I check back at it like at least once a day and I am just like, ugh ... look at this thing! It’s the gilded Marigold Tarot deck. Quite a dark theme, but oh my, it’s absolutely gorgeous! I can’t get it out of my head! The $60-80 price tag is quite a hefty one though, at least for the time being. I can’t really justify spending that money on a tarot deck with the struggle currently going on with FK ... 

The deck I have right now is the Gateway to the Divine Tarot. It’s a really nice deck, very detailed and everything. But I just don’t vibe with it ... 😥😥😥 I pull cards, I look at them, and then I just sort of feel this ‘ugh’ feeling inside and shove them away. Because even though the imagery is really nice and eye-catching it doesn’t hold my attention and I just, ... I don’t like it? Does it make sense? Am I being a spoiled and difficult Fresh Noob here? lol 

Wemps raring, gosh, did that little mini forecast make me both happy and a little frustrated (I mean, the patience part ... I really have to work on that one, don’t I??). I did snort and laugh a little though when you said you got The Star, because ... lately I’ve been all surrounded by stars. My whole mantra/theme for July was in fact a star studded one! (And let’s not mention how my friend has been pushing for me to change camps and start rooting for a certain Star-named hockey team lately as well ...)

Also, a small story (because why not make this HUGE post even longer, right??) - I have a really special connection to the Sun card. Not particularly the meaning of it, but the name and the imagery. Darling Fresh Noob Granny passed away when I was a mere wee little girl of the small age of six. Way way too soon. We had quite a special bond, everyone always kept commenting on it, and she always called me her sun (and she was my moon). So whenever the sun card comes up (no matter what the position), Fresh Noob do get a little sappy and take it as a small nod from Granny. 

THAT’S IT. Gosh, what a lengthy blabbering drag this turned into. I’m sorry, raring Wempy. All the smultron and wienerbröd to you if you managed to stick through this all, you’ve earned them! Now, it’s time for this little one to get up and keep following her own star ... 

#Wempy Raring #longest rant in the history of fresh noob schmitting #star filled mush #submission

[ask-shakespearehigh]

Q&A post with the Mods!!!!

This is going to be a long one oh boy

How strict is the delineation of creative control vis-a-vis characters/plays between the mods? (@pedanticlecturer)

We generally have the plays split up along lines of “what we know”— we have a list at the very beginning of the blog. Sometimes we’ll draw the others’ characters (mostly me drawing some of Star’s…) but even then the final say on characterization is up to the “main” mod for that play — mod aster

what aster said -- mod star

What is your favorite play? What is your favorite character in terms of how they were written in the source material? (@pedanticlecturer)

I think my favorite play overall is Macbeth, just because I like the vibes (and the fact that I too could kill Macbeth), the fact that you don’t say it’s name in theatres, and the fact that it’s a play I did a full read through and analysis of in class. Favorite character? Puck from Midsummer. — mod aster

uhhhh,, hmm. ive always had a soft spot for midsummer since i saw it with aster esp bc of how fun the costumes were. of the comedies it has the largest potential to be the most visually pleasing bc of the concept of fairies,,,and im gay and dramatic so i love that. id die if i got to costume design for midsummer,,,or be in it,,,yeah. fav character. hmm. probably mercutio?? i recently saw a version of romeo and juliet where mercutio was played by a woman and oh my god it was amazing!!! not to mention mercutio’s portrayal in baz luhrmann's INCREDIBLE version of r n j!!! (I based my mercutio design on him) he just spends the entire time making dick jokes. love that. -- mod star

How do you answer asks so fast? I mean it's great but I'm impressed 😂 (Anon)

Personally, it’s a mix of: notifications on, quick drawing speed, and using the blog to avoid my class work — mod aster

aster is fast and (as you can see from all of my answers) im lazey -- mod star

Are there any elements/characters of the plays you're covering that you would have liked to work into this blog's plot, but couldn't due to the constraints of the setting or the synthetic nature of the blog? (@pedanticlecturer)

I wanted to make everyone gay but unfortunately due to plot constraints we have to have some hets but that wont stop me from making it lgbt as possible. -- mod star

I did want to make The Tempest more of a central play, but it just didn’t translate well. Similarly, other supernatural elements like the witches in Macbeth. This isn’t so much a constraint mentioned, but my own time/energy means that I want to show the Macbeth backstory, in a specific format, but I can’t right now— mod aster

Is there a hierarchy of import when it comes to each play's individualized impact on shakespeare high's general arc? If so, what plays are crucial to the foundation of the story? Which ones did you do mostly for shits and giggles? (@pedanticlecturer)

This is phrased like an ACT question and i might not answer it right so sorry in advance but: mod aster and i only selected a few plays for each of us to do given we dont know all of shakespeare’s works, but we tend to put more emphasis on the the more well known. But it also comes down to 1. How much we have plotted out for each play and 2. What the followers ask about most. Our two most popular are hamlet and macbeth bc people are familiar w those but around march caesar always becomes relevant again. I didnt even have designs for some of the characters until someone asked about them. -- mod star

I would say the same as star— it generally comes down to what people ask about. I will say that the overall plot is sort of separated into “has happened” and “is happening”. Like, the human potion of Midsummer, Julius Caesar, and Macbeth are all in the “aftermath” portion, while Twelfth Night, Hamlet, and Romeo and Juliet, among others, are happening. We’re trying to incorporate as much as we can, and I don’t think any of them were really put in without some thought.— mod aster

What personal significance does shakespeare hold in ur guys' lives? (@pedanticlecturer)

I go to a theater school rn and so ive dealt w shakespeare (although not all of them) it also helps that i was in loves labours lost last year as moth and that i read hamlet and r n j. Theres also a theater in my state that always does One Big Shakespeare per season and they always do them super well!!! My love for shakespeare probably started w seeing midsummer at that theater w mod aster!!! So. Theater kid rights!! -- mod star

To be honest, I got back into Shakespeare Because of the blog. I’ve been friends with some people that got really Pretentious about Shakespeare, and it kinda put me off of it. I did have a book of abridged plays (the plays’ plots written out in prose, basically) that I read as a kid, which is what got me into not only the plots of a lot of the plays, but also the idea of having them illustrated. And, same as star, the theater in state does the One Big Shakespeare— and they tend to do some really cool things with the costumes, setting them in diff time periods. I haven’t been able to see any lately since I’ve moved, but they still slap. — mod aster

🥰😘💙🥰🥰💜💟🥰I 😍💗💚😍😍LOVE🖤🖤 YALL ♥️♥️🧡💛💚💝❣️💕💘💖💗💓💞💝❤️💛💜 okay now i have a question i swear— how long have the two of you been doing art??? and what were your first shakespeare plays??? (@hellaghosts)

Uhh i started drawing when i was like idk 12 and i have the giant boxes of sketchbooks to prove it!!! I moved to digital art at abt 14-15 but mostly stayed traditional until this yr when i got a Neat New Tablet so some of my sketchbooks are sitting abandoned rip. My first shakespeare was either romeo and juliet or midsummer nights dream and i love both of them v much!!! I have a very old piece of art that i did for r n j for my freshman class assignment on it and it hasnt aged well alsdjfjafd circa 2016 i think??? -- mod star

Oh man. I started drawing when I was about 10, but it was Bad. I don’t think I got much into drawing again until I was about 14? Sometime around the end of middle school/beginning of high school. I would say I started getting into drawing as more than doodling/coloring edits sometime around 2015-16? I would draw on my iPad with my finger, then I got a tablet for my computer, and now I pretty much stick to my iPad with an Apple Pencil. My first Shakespeare play was….. uh…… probably Midsummer???? I have No idea. We would go to plays when I was little, so I honestly don’t remember if I saw others before. It may have been Romeo and Juliet— I had that book where it was the original and the “modernized” with the little dog that explained things— which, if you know it makes sense, but if you don’t is probably a bonkers answer. — mod aster

Do you think this blog has like? An overarching thesis (be it b/c intentionally or simply b/c ur own take on the world has bled thru to the point where u believe it’s central to the piece at this point)? (@pedanticlecturer)

Not gonna lie, I had to read that like three times AND dm you to figure out what you were asking from us and all I have is “be gay, respect women, write your own happy endings”. — mod aster

This blog started with an ides of march shitpost and you think we have enough brain energy to write a whole thesis? I projected feelings of found family onto my half of the blog but idk if that counts. Be gay do crime 420 69 -- mod star

What’s the nature/rough dynamic of ur relationship? How do y’all know each other? (@pedanticlecturer)

Met mod aster when i was like 4 and even tho we didnt live close we became like, best friends although the Best part didnt start until we were like 13-ish and eventually we talked like non stop (about anime and homestuck. Yknow. 13 year old kid things) and we didnt see each other a lot bc of Distance and now its even worse bc aster is in colleg.,e but we consider each other siblings regardless of family bc we’re adopted into our own respective families so that bled over into our friendship and it would feel weird calling him anything other than my brother now. We’ve seen each other at our best and worst and if you really want a good insight on what we’re like as siblings watch griffin and justin mcelroy’s overview video of catlateral damage wherein i am griffin and he is the long suffering justin. -- mod star

Star is basically my long distance sibling and functionally the only cousin I recognize bc like their parents are basically an aunt and uncle and like our dads look enough alike that we’ve both accidentally gotten the wrong dad for a hug or similar so like. Anyways yeah Star is the Griffin to my Justin, complete with our absent middle brother who we love dearly— mod aster

Dubiously relevant q but what kind of music do y’all listen to when u do art (if that is indeed a habit either of u partake in) (@pedanticlecturer)

It can depend on the piece? I was working on some (unrelated) oc prints that were song-focused, and for those I just listened to said song on loop. Sometimes I have playlists. Sometimes I’ll just be in a Mood and throw a song on loop. But a lot of time for the blog, I’ll listen to The Adventure Zone for the billionth time, because I have Too Much Attention. I’ve also, on request from Star, linked the most recent “loop song”.— mod aster

I tend to obsess over the same like 3 songs every few weeks so those get listened to on repeat but it also depends on the tone of what im drawing or who im drawing i might genre switch bc of that. If im drawing ophelia i stick to lana del rey and if im drawing hamlet its the neighborhood, horatio is sufjan stevens etc. i have categorized,. Most of the characters i draw into different songs/genres/energies of music but not like i ever follow that. Sometimes i just pull up a really long nonsense video and forget to draw. Essentially: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ -- mod star

How’d y’all come up with ur pseudonyms? (@pedanticlecturer)

I love space so much and my main blog is starryeydsailor space gay rights!! Im also tiny and full of energy and bright so basically i;m star -- mod star

Uhhhh i was like “hey i want to do uhhhhhh flower?” And then I google searched flower names until I found one I liked —- mod aster

How did you end up deciding the rough timeline of events in canon? (@pedanticlecturer)

It’s mostly determined by like. How we choose per story? If that makes sense. Like, we just take story by story, and decide “is it happening, has it happened, and when?” And then we fit them together in relation to each other just by dint of. All existing at once. Like, I knew I wanted Macbeth to be in aftermath, because like, even though there’s no murder, the way I’ve translated it to the AU is still kinda heavy, and it’s something that I don’t know that I could do properly if it were happening right now. Also, it’s more interesting IMO to have them at different times. Tl;dr we wing it per story and slot them together— mod aster (mod star agrees I just can word better, in theory)

If you could tell the story of shakespeare high in a different format than an ask blog, would you? Obviously y'all are making very good use of the format, but would you want to write this as a animated series or like? a comic book? or is the form inseparable from the story? (@pedanticlecturer)

I kinda wanted to do a webcomic or maybe to plot develop through like, animatics but the element of surprise comes from the asks we get and really makes us think so the blog is a good start. We didnt think we’d get this far -- mod star

Pretty much what Star said— there are certain elements where it’d be neat to do as a comic or as an animatic. Like, the fantasy dream is like, an anthology webcomic of each story, where you can like, see other characters in the background and stuff. But to be honest, we develop a lot by what we’re asked— there was a post about developing worldbuilding by being asked questions and then pretending you’ve thought about the answer, and it’s not far off. Personally, it’s hard to just lay out a story, because I have a whole WORLD and what’s relevant? What are people interested in? It’s by getting questions that I can then focus in on an area to develop. And yeah, we Super didn’t think we’d get this far lmao — mod aster

Any headcanons about your characters that you don't think will ever come up on the blog through asks or plot posts? (@pedanticlecturer)

I could make a whole separate post for this!!!!! Mostly its voice headcanons (and by mostly i mean like 1 or 2) or relationship hcs!!!! -- mod star

Honestly same. I don’t think I have voice headcanons for mine, though I bet I could find some. I’ve got a bunch of miscellaneous headcanons that just kinda float around, but like they’re scattered, too numerous for this post, and also not always things I’m sure are canon yet.— mod aster

#mod post #mod aster #mod star #q and a #birthday #we cant seem to read more AND tag so like brb gonna go kill god

[acaseforpencils]

Lars Kenseth.

Bio: I’m a cartoonist and writer living in Los Angeles. I love being creative, but cartooning was my first love. My mom always tells me how much I loved the “marker table” at Montessori School— I was obsessed. That obsession never waned, as much as some of my teachers wished it had. I grew up all over New England, moving towns almost every year. Drawing cartoons was the one constant. Somehow, I got into Dartmouth College in New Hampshire. I discovered the animation department in my Junior year and finally found a way to keep drawing, while still technically earning a degree.

Find this print here!

To be honest, I never really thought I was good enough for The New Yorker. My dad introduced me to Charles Addams and Sam Gross when I was very young, speaking of them with a kind of reverence usually reserved for the Framers or the 1970 Boston Bruins. But, eventually I got over myself and decided to go for it. Now I’m happy to say I’ve been published in The New Yorker, MAD, Playboy, Esquire, Barron’s, Alta Journal Of California and The American Bystander. It’s stupid that I get to do this.

Me hosting an NCS-LA meeting with Ann Telnaes of The Washington Post!

Before I ever mustered the resolve to submit to The New Yorker, I made my living (and still do) writing comedy for TV. I’ve written for shows like MTV’s Popzilla, Voltron and Norm Macdonald Has A Show for Netflix. Currently, I’m developing Chuck Deuce, an animated TV show I created for Adult Swim.

One other tidbit, I’m the current Chairman of the National Cartoonist Society - LA Chapter. We wear plaid, sing, and have fun guests speak. If you’re a cartoonist in LA, swing by.

Tools of Choice: I really only have one tool. My Apple Pencil. I’m almost exclusively on the iPad these days. I used to use a Cintiq, which I did love. It was an old, glitchy unit, from around 2007. The stylus would often skip.  But, I give that skipping stylus a lot of credit for how I draw today. Since I have an animation background, my drawing style always used to be a little too “mainstream”. Closer to Simpsons than Steig. So before I started submitting, I took some time to work on my style. I was trying everything - long heads, squat bodies, pointy noses, etc. But one afternoon, that stylus just kept glitching out… and I kind of liked it. I was getting this variable line quality that I thought was really unique. So I went with it. The Apple Pencil lets me get the same line variability, but with a lot more control.

Me drawing at home on my iPad. Which, to be honest, looks a lot more like a Grizzly Bear trying to drink a Capri Sun.

If I ever do an original, I’ll use the Rotring Art Pen. It uses an ink cartridge. I like it. And it’s the only thing I’ve been able to find that can even get close to replicating my line style. Although, sometimes I have to go over a line a couple times. Or hover the nib over the paper a little to get more ink to come out. If there’s another way, I’m open to suggestions, by the way.

Tools I Wish I Could Use Better: Dip pens. Sigh. I dunno, I’m just such a fuck up with dip pens. I’m a messy artist anyway, which is partly why I love digital, I can undo all my mistakes. But using dip pens to me, it’s like trying to break a wild stallion. And I’m a rodeo clown in this scenario, so. You can guess how that would go.

Here’s the one cartoon I got into Barron’s before they shut the door!

Tools I Wish Existed: I just wish there was some kind of ink pen that better replicated what I do digitally. It just seems impossible. Again, open to suggestions. It’s strange - I’m tech obsessed, and I also love the environment. So saving a lot of trees with the Apple Pencil is something I enjoy. However, I love the feel of paper. I miss it.

Tricks: If your hand gets tired or hurts using the Apple Pencil, I recommend getting some pencil grips. I like the cheap foam grips you can get on Amazon. I’d say get them at Blick or somewhere, but honestly, I haven’t found them in stores. I tried ripping the comfort grip off of a BIC pen, but it just didn’t feel right. Also, it’s a strangely brutal task. I don’t recommend it.

Don’t get too fancy with the ergonomic grips. In my opinion, you sacrifice too much control in the cause of comfort. I can’t even with those things.

A cartoon for Mad. Misc: I love making pizza. I’m obsessed with great pizza. The greatest is Pizzeria Regina in Boston’s North End. And that’s the North END OF DISCUSSION. Here are some shots of pizzas I have made…

My standard thin crust.

The above is a clone of Spontini pizza — a deep dish place in Milan that is INCREDIBLE.

Ooooo check out that gluten development! All hail gluten!

Anyone for bulk fermentation?

Website, Etc. Follow me on Instagram: larskenseth

Or, go to my website that’s sorely in need of updating: www.larskenseth.com

Me at the signing of MAD issue No. 1 - after the reboot. That’s Sergio Aragones in the foreground. That’s me smiling idiotically at the line.

Find more posts about art supplies on Case’s Instagram! There is a Twitter as well. If you like watercolors of baby animals, I recently created a professional Instagram for my own art, which you can find here!

If you enjoy this blog, and would like to help me do things like renew the domain name etc, there is also a Patreon! Thank you!

Hope you all are having a wonderful Holiday Season!

#lars kenseth #lars kenseth new yorker #New Yorker cartoons #tnycartoons #how to be a cartoonist #how to be a New Yorker cartoonist

[profound-boning]

timestamp for A Kind of Magic; ~1790 words, deancas friendship (they’re 11), cole trenton sux, Hogwarts feels

As his first year draws to a close, Dean feels nothing but gratitude for the many wonderful things that have happened since September.

His flying skills have improved, he’s earned good grades (or, “top marks” as Professors MacLeod and Crowley are fond of saying) and had an amazing amount of fun.

Sunny afternoons by the lake, all-nighters in the Hufflepuff common room, and the best birthday party he could have imagined are at the top of the list, with his friends faces shining brightly in every memory.

The end of the year exams are similar to what Dean remembers from “regular school” but middle school was a lot different from Hogwarts. At his old school they did a lot of projects, used computers and iPads, and ate lunch in the cafeteria. Plus, he had to go home every day. Here, he gets to see his friends all the time and his classes are way more fun. Dean can do magic.

One thing that is the same is the bullies. At Dean’s old school they put kids in lockers or stole their glasses or pencils. Here, they’ll cast a spell to make your pants disappear or your books, or they’ll give you a treat that makes your tongue swell up.

Or, if you’re Christian and Cole, you stick to mean insults. Dean doesn’t believe in that “sticks and stones” mumbo jumbo anymore because words can be very hurtful.

Actually, Christian has gotten a tiny bit better. Rather, he got the talking to of his life from the professors and maybe even from his family because he’s backed off a lot. He doesn’t approach Dean at all, just glares at him or makes threatening gestures in the halls. Dean and his friends are careful to steer clear of the older Gryffindors on principle.

Cole is, unfortunately, not backing off at all and is a much more difficult to avoid.

It doesn’t make sense to Dean that Cole wants to pick on him when they’ve hardly interacted at all, but he’s accepted it. Everyone who matters is kind to him and supportive when he’s feeling down. So why worry about one jerk?

Dean would much rather focus on how many marshmallows he and Garth can fit into their mouths, what’s the craziest spell he and Kelly can find in their textbooks, and where else in the castle can he and Cas explore before the end of the year?

Cas seems to know everything about Hogwarts, which is due to a combination of having a magical family, being a curious and adventurous kid, having an equally curious and adventurous friend like Dean, and being a huge dork. Dean reminds him of that quite often, including this very morning while they are eating breakfast.

“Hey, dork, where should we go exploring today?” he asks, biting into an apple.

Rolling his eyes, Cas smiles at him. “I’m not sure yet. Let’s pick a random staircase again?” They could probably do this all seven years and not cover every single staircase, landing, and hallway in the castle—the way that the stairs constantly change makes it difficult to keep track of their progress.

“Sure thing,” Dean agrees, adding butter to his toast. “Hey, did you finish our Potions homework yet?”

“Yes,” Cas answers around the pancake in his mouth. “I had some free time,” he says defensively when Dean glares at him.

“You spend all your free time flying, not writing essays,” he says. “What gives?”

Cas laughs. “That’s true. I guess I had extra extra free time.”

Dean sighs heavily, pretending to be very put upon. “I guess I’ll have to suffer on my own, then. Waste away on this assignment.”

“You big baby,” Cas teases. “All you have to do is ask and I’ll help you.”

He leans into Cas’s shoulder. “Thanks, buddy. You’re a gem.”

“I know,” Cas says loftily. “Don’t you forget it.”

They eat some more before exiting the Great Hall, wearing jeans in celebration of the weekend. Cas is wearing a lumpy sweater—which should be weird considering it’s the end of May and fairly warm, but Cas tends to get cold more easily so it makes sense.

Their morning passes without incident, traipsing from one end of the castle to the other. Dean chose the stairs this time and led them up a tower they hadn’t seen yet. They look out of the windows in order to explore the outside of the castle and observe the grounds. Lots of people are taking advantage of the nice weather to relax outside, including Benny and a pretty Ravenclaw girl named Andrea. Dean hollers at his friend just to be embarrassing and Cas hits his arm.

“Dean! Don’t tease him,” Cas admonishes, even though he’s laughing, too.

“Just having fun. Benny’s got such a big crush on her.” Dean rolls his eyes. “I don’t get it.”

Cas looks at him. “He likes her. We’re all pretty sure she likes him back; all of us except Benny, that is. What’s not to get?”

Dean scrunches his nose. “Dunno, just doesn’t seem important at the moment.”

“Well, Dean, just because you’d rather be reading or practicing spells doesn’t mean the rest of us are nerds like you.” Cas backs away quickly to avoid Dean hitting him, pushing off the wall to keep running up the stairs. And back down again, still avoiding Dean’s grasp, they laugh and shout together.

“If you aren’t in class, or getting ready for class, or doing homework, or working ahead for class, then you’re eating!”

“Shut up, Cas! I’m not the one who ate two whole boxes of those jelly beans you love in one night!”

And this is certainly what Dean will miss the most over the long summer months. The feeling of being with Cas, being wild and free with him, laughing harder than he ever has before.

They’re hoping to get John to agree to let them visit each other at some point over the long break until September, but Dean isn’t hopeful. He tries to be as optimistic as Cas but it’s hard to think about the look on his dad’s face if Dean were to ask to go and stay at a magical home or to bring another young wizard into their house.

Therefore, he takes in every single moment they have left, embraces having fun with all of his friends with fervor. He can’t really spend time with them all at once, so he has to improvise. And at least there’s always the owl post.

He and Cas eventually decide to quit running around indoors. It’s really a beautiful day outside. Cas makes noises about getting out on his broomstick again while Dean contemplates the classwork that needs his attention. They agree that the Quidditch pitch is a great place to meet both of their needs and they set off for the dormitories to grab their things. Dean isn’t allowed past the stairs leading down to the Slytherin “dungeon” as he likes to call it just to tease his best friend, so he lingers in the hall. It only takes Cas a minute to change and then they set off toward the Hufflepuff common room. The old tradition of keeping the rooms absolutely top secret from other students has petered off, with friends often waiting for each other in the hallways, but the common room itself is practically sacred. It’d just be weird to have someone else in there—even the professors don’t go in unless there’s an emergency.

That means rounding the corner and spotting Cole Trenton standing in front of the barrels that make up what amounts to Dean’s front door is pretty freaky. He quickly nudges Cas and they silently back up out of sight.

“What the hell?” Cas whispers, looking angry.

“Dunno.” He shrugs. “What do you think’s going on?”

Cas peers around the corner and whispers, “I think he’s trying to break in, that little—”

“But why? What’s even the point?”

Cas chews his lip. “Could be nothing. But maybe he’s trying to pull some prank. You know what though? It doesn’t matter. It’s the principle of the thing. He shouldn’t just be trying to bust in there, it isn’t cool.”

“I agree,” Dean says, leaning over to look again. Cole seems to be stuck on precisely what to do to the barrels to get the door to open but it may not be long before he figures it out. “Donnie told me no one’s been down there for—”

He never gets to finish that sentence. Cole screams bloody murder the second the enchanted barrels react to his attempted entry, despite the fact that the vinegar is harmless. Still, getting absolutely drenched in the stuff can’t feel good. He must have tried a pattern at random and that caused the doorway to reject him harshly.

Dean and Cas lean on each other’s shoulders in order to laugh hysterically. When they realize Cole can hear them, they grab each other’s hand and run away as fast as they can. Still laughing, they duck into the otherwise empty Great Hall and double over.

“Oh my”—Cas pants—“I can’t breathe.”

“The funniest thing I’ve ever seen,” Dean agrees, breathless with laughter. “I’m getting a cramp.”

Cas wipes actual tears from under his eyes and snorts. “I can’t believe our luck to witness that. We’re so blessed.”

“Think it taught him a lesson?” he wonders.

Cas looks thoughtful. “One can only hope,” he finally answers. “But c’mon.” He tugs on Dean’s shirt sleeve. “Let’s head down to the pitch.”

“But I don’t have my homework,” he whines. Regardless, he follows Cas out of the Hall.

“We can come back for it later,” Cas reasons, “after the vinegar gets cleaned up.”

“Oh, I didn’t think of that. Should we tell someone?” Dean frets.

As they pass by the hallway in question, they observe Professor Mills laying into a soaking wet and smelly Cole with Professor Singer looking on quite sternly, arms folded.

“Looks like it’s all been taken care of,” Cas says breezily. “He’ll be cleaning that up with a toothbrush, mark my words.”

Dean laughs again just picturing that. Soon, the pair duck outside and are greeted by warm sunshine. Since Dean doesn’t have his materials to study, maybe Cas will help him practice his flying.

He looks over at Cas, still grinning broadly (probably also imagining that bully scrubbing the floors outside Dean’s common room) and leading them toward the storage unit for practice brooms.

Dean feels incredibly grateful that he met Cas on the train and, when Cas turns to hand him a broom with a toothy smile, he feels happy. Perfectly, indescribably, untouchably happy.

#jhoomwrites #ozonecologne #thebatsquad #puppycastiel #profoundnet #omegadeannet #glassesdeannetwork #mishacollinsnet #adorablecocklesnet #scrunchnet #dcjsquad #2014casnet #publicado #pbwrites #fic #timestamp #au #hogwarts!au #destiel #dean #cas #wizard!cas #slytherin!cas #wizard!dean #hufflepuff!dean #cole #bullying cw

[speedyengineerfury]

Pro Engineer For Mac

A great deal of digital ink has been spilled (pixels have been randomly arranged?) over whether the iPad is actually a useful productivity tool and much of it has been written by artists, technology journalists and bloggers, but I have yet to see much of a comprehensive examination of the iPad from an engineering perspective.

Engineer Mac Unit

Pro Engineer For Mac High Sierra

Pro Engineer For Mac Installer

Before I go further, if you prefer listening to podcasts, I talk about it extensively on Episode 68: Paperless of Pragmatic on The Engineered Network.

Jun 29, 2020 Not only has the iPad Pro moved towards the ethos of a MacBook with the release of a Magic Keyboard and touchpad for the tablet, the user interface of both MacOS and iPadOS have a growing similarity. Aug 11, 2020 New Apple MacBook Pro (16-inch, 16GB RAM, 512GB Storage, 2.6GHz Intel Core i7) - Space Gray Universities like Virginia Tech recommend the highest graphics possible with a good screen resolution. The new 16-inch Macbook Pro with retina display is the only contender for a Macbook for engineering majors.

I know several other engineers that aren’t interested in the Apple cult, and prefer the configurability of Microsoft products of the past and they latched on to the Surface when it came out however reports of its sluggishness and heft as a tablet made it more of a laptop with a detachable keyboard than an actual tablet, and the Surface Pen was not held in very high regard either. I heard of issues with palm rejection and accuracy as well as lag, but observation is the best tell and I’ve observed those people using their Surface almost exclusively as a laptop, and seldom if ever using the Pen.

As I am more personally invested in the Apple ecosystem, I’ve owned and throughly used an iPad 1, iPad 2, iPad Air, iPad Mini, iPad Mini 2 and now an iPad Pro. In that time I’ve used a Griffin 2-in-1 Pen/Capacitive Stylus, an Adonit Jot Pro and now an Apple Pencil. So with those qualifications out of the way…

What’s Special About Engineering?

Engineer Mac Unit

Engineering involves conveying a lot of information diagrammatically and it’s not the only profession that does. In that sense marking up drawings, flow charts, red lines and whiteboards are our tools for this job, but what frustrates me more than the old tongue in cheek comment “the age of the paperless office” which apparently happened in the 80s but the world must have missed it somehow, as I intuitively know that moment is coming. What device/service or combination thereof will finally deliver on that promise-turned-running-gag?

To be effective as an engineering tool for me personally it needs to solve several problems I have:

An engineering notebook everywhere that stores sketches, handwritten as well as typed notes

Accurate markups of PDFs without loss of resolution

Creating flow charts and diagrams quickly and easily

Portable enough to take everywhere with me

Able to physically sign documents, in Word and PDFs accurately

The goals are to eliminate three issues I encounter every day at work:

I need to carry three pens everywhere (Blue, Black and Red) and they leak, they get lost, they run out of ink, they suck

I currently have to print a document, write my markups on it, then scan it in again which erodes the resolution every time and makes the original document unsearchable even with the best OCR software currently available.

I make notes in my engineering notebook (a legal requirement) and need to take it everywhere with me but its size is limited so I move from book to book with transitional periods between books requiring that I carry multiple at once.

Pro Engineer For Mac High Sierra

iPad for Engineering: Take 1

The iPad Pro for engineering is therefore first and foremost about the stylus, but the ability to use the device with a touch screen keyboard would be a huge plus as well if it could pull it off. That said I’d tried styluses before without much luck and touch screen keyboards as well without any success, so call me skeptical from the outset.

I drew several Enginerd comic strips using my iPad Mini 2 and the Griffin and Adonit mentioned previously but to be honest it was difficult and frustrating. I tried to use older iPads and styluses at work and the two big issues that kept arising were:

Stylus accuracy and speed made drawing markups, signatures and notes effectively impossible to do

I found myself regularly erasing and trying strokes and signatures again and again and eventually giving up (signatures bared no resemblance to my signature with a traditional pen and paper)

Typing was slow because the key sizes on the Mini were too cramped and on the original iPad the typing lag was beyond horrible much of the time

Of course the typing problems of an iPad can be overcome in some ways by using an external keyboard. To that end I used an original iPad keyboard dock with all of the models from time to time, even using a 30-pin dock to lightning adaptor with a box of old business cards to support the weight of the iPad (a trick that worked fine until the iPad Pro came about). It was excellent, however only useful on my desktop at work and for portability to meetings and on the train it was useless.

I also tried the Clamcase, but it just wasn’t stable enough even on the train with the keyboard component regularly disconnecting and being horribly sluggish at the best of times. I wrote about it, I podcasted about it and honestly I gave up on the iPad as an engineering productivity tool.

That was, until the iPad Pro and the Apple Pencil were released.

iPad for Engineering: Take 2

Ever willing to give technology another chance, I obtained an iPad Pro, Apple Pencil and Smart Cover and took it to work for several weeks in the lead up to Christmas determined that if it didn’t work out, I would return them. If they couldn’t earn their place then they had no place. The TL;DR: I still have them all.

Double Touch Typing

Yes I did a year of typing classes at high school and I’m a touch typist as a result of those hard yards. Keyboard key spacing is critical when I’m going from device to device. I’ve tried many times to use touch screen keyboards for touch typing, but there have always been two issues: No locators for your index fingers (see those notches on your F and J keys on your physical keyboard? Yeah those things) and the key-sizing and inter-key spacing a were always just off/small enough such that when typing on the screen like it was a physical keyboard, many keys didn’t align. Typing on older/smaller iPads was slower, very inaccurate and ultimately frustrating typing and in the end I just gave up.

Pro Engineer For Mac Installer

When I’m talking about key-sizing and inter-key spacing, what I’m referring to is that the physical dimensions of the screens on iPads make it physically impossible to create a virtual keyboard that matches a physical equivalent. The same is true of the iPad Pro, actually but it’s damned close. The key sizes and spacing on the iPads 1, 2, Mini, Pro, Smart Keyboard and a Apple Wireless keyboard for comparative purposes as shown below:

Device / KeyboardWidth (mm)Height (mm)Key Spacing (mm)iPad Mini Landscape1211.514.5iPad Pro Portrait1211.513.5iPad 1 & 2 Landscape151417iPad Pro Landscape161518iPad Pro Smart Keyboard1514.519Standard MBP and 1st Generation Aluminium Physical Keyboards161519

A real world physical keyboard is 273mm wide from the left hand edge of the Caps Lock to the right hand edge of the Return key. The full width of the iPad Pro screen is only 263mm, and that missing 10mm has to come from somewhere. As you can see from the table above, Apple shaved it off the inter-key spacing, which is the obvious choice and honestly the one I would have made as well.

Touch Typing: How Fast is Fast?

As a way to test just how different the typing was between the touch screen and a real physical keyboard, I took a good old-fashioned typing test, using a 1st Generation Aluminium Apple physical keyboard as well as the new Smart Keyboard vs the iPad Pro touch screen keyboard in landscape mode. I used the app “TapTyping” and each test was performed three times in each configuration and the best time taken from each.

Just for good measure I threw in a test on the same hardware and software by using the iPad Pro in portrait mode whose keyboard dimensions closely approximates my previous failed attempts to get screen touch typing utility from the iPad Mini keyboard. Hence, same software, same hardware iPad with only the keyboard data entry as the variable. The results:

Device/KeyboardSpeed (wpm)Accuracy (%)iPad Pro soft keyboard in Portrait Mode3994iPad Pro Smart Keyboard6396iPad Pro soft keyboard in Landscape Mode6797iPad Pro with Apple Bluetooth Keyboard8598

It’s important to note that the typing test accuracy does not rely on auto corrections and letters must be corrected prior to proceeding. That said, the occasional need to glance down at my virtual keys really hurt my speed and the slightly different key spacings also hurt my accuracy, but it’s the same old story: physical keyboards will always be faster for raw speed.

Without a physical edge to feel for, once your fingers are visually aligned on the F&J keys, the maximum error on the iPad Pro is now only 1mm for the standard keyboard keys. For me at least, that turns out to be the threshold of usability for the first time for touch typing on a touch screen. (I henceforth refer to that as double touch typing)

I’m still slowed down initially when I glance down at the glass to position my fingers for the first letters but after that it doesn’t require any further thinking or retraining and I’m happily typing away. My fingers sometimes need to realign on the stretch keys that can drag my hands away from their home position over the F&J keys which then slows me down.

The verdict though: the iPad Pro is by the far the best and perhaps only iPad out there that I can double touch type on.

Smart Keyboard

The Smart Keyboard is designed to work only with the iPad Pro and uses the three small and well disguised pins located on the left hand side of the tablet. It has several folding configurations depending upon whether you want to use the keyboard or not, or in carrying mode. All of these took a fair amount of practice in the store to get your head around.

I tried typing on the Smart Keyboard in an Apple Store several times for up to 30 minutes at a time trying to decide what I thought about the key mechanism but I ultimately came away with the impression that it felt rubbery, sluggish and annoying.

Interestingly though, despite being a physical keyboard, I wasn’t able to type faster than the touch keyboard, but as the results show it’s not by much of a margin. The marginally smaller keys and texture of those keys made it harder to feel the edges than the standard Bluetooth keyboard but those locating notches were nevertheless helpful.

The truth is however, if I wanted to lug around a physical keyboard it needs to have more normal physical keys on it. The keys on the Smart Keyboard feel like a material compromise too far, most likely as a weight reduction measure, thinness and possibly also for moisture resistance, but either way it doesn’t feel that great, and for that kind of money it needs to.

I wanted to try the touch typing experience on the touch screen before I spent money on the smart keyboard and with the results of the touch keyboard being promising, for the moment at least I think I’ll pass on the smart keyboard. If I didn’t have a laptop and the iPad Pro was my only device then I could understand buying a physical keyboard as well.

Such a big screen needs some sort of protection however so if you’re serious about protecting your investment then the ideal typing experience could include a Smart Cover and an external keyboard of some kind. To that end I looked at two Apple-based options.

DeviceCost (AUD)Cost (USD)Weight (g)Smart Keyboard$269$169337Apple Wireless Keyboard$165$99231Smart Cover$89$59162(AWK + SC Combination)-$15-$11+56

The best typing experience would be to buy the Bluetooth keyboard and the Smart Cover and only take the keyboard when lots of typing was anticipated. I dare say for the vast majority of tablet owners the Smart Keyboard will get little use if they have another computing device with a genuine keyboard. I think, to borrow Tim Cooks expression, the keyboard makes the iPad a more “confusing product” than it needs to be. Especially when you consider just how good the double touch typing experience now is on the iPad Pro screen.

Also to prove the point that the touch screen is plenty good, this entire article was typed in double touch.

Apple Pencil

I’ve always dreamed of having both a responsive and an accurate stylus but until I tried this one, I hadn’t found it. Yes I did the slow motion thing and I know there is still lag, and yes some apps haven’t been updated to fully utilise the Apple Pencil specific APIs. Honestly though, those apps that have been updated are a dream to use and the drawing lag is barely perceptible unless you’re trying to find it.

Before we get to that though, as a drawing device I had no option but to compare them with the competition:

Writing ImplementWeight (g)Papermate InkJoy boring old normal ball-point pen7Apple Pencil20.5Adonit23

Of course it’s not a fair fight since the Apple Pencil is an active device with a battery and such, and the metal case of the Adonit makes it quite a bit heavier, but the thing I noticed the most was that the Apple Pencil feels like the heaviest pen to hold in your hand when you’re writing like due to its weight distribution. I sometimes remove the lid from pencils to make them lighter and reduce their overall length when using them for longer periods. (Reduces hand fatigue) This also has the effect of reducing the pressure I write with when I do so. The plug/cap on the end of the Apple Pencil doesn’t make much of a difference to either the weight or the length of the device and it still feels just as heavy.

Okay that’s a bit of a nit pick for sure but I personally don’t like a hefty pen when I’m writing with it for a long period of time. It feels unnecessary and adds no real value since it appears as though they’ve added steel to weight it to prevent rolling and also to be attracted to the magnets mounted in the iPad. Directly comparing it then, I’ve found using it for longer periods tires my hand more so than a traditional pen would, which is understandable given the additional weight.

I can get used to that of course, since I used to be able to write six pages of text notes during a two hour lecture 20 years ago without my hand cramping. Those were the days…(insert old man comment here)

Logistics

Carrying the iPad Pro between meetings is no different to bringing my traditional notebook, and the battery life easily lasts the day with practically constant use. I do get annoyed about the short battery life of the Apple Pencil with a full day of use in my job requiring an emergency charge mid-afternoon on two separate days. That said, the charging was quick even though inserting it into the Lightning port looks ridiculous and is particularly prone to accidental damage if you or someone close by is careless.

Software

I started out using the built in Notes app for taking my notes but moved to GoodNotes shortly thereafter and even transcribed my notes into that app for its amazing handwriting recognition features. I’ve been using Grafio for charts and diagrams and PDF Pen for marking up PDFs. Sync services via iCloud and Dropbox for those apps work really well but refer to my individual reviews of those apps for more about the software component of the iPad Pro equation.

Non-Engineering Tasks

Having owned and extensively used all of the iPad form factors now, I can safely say that the size extremes have clear use cases with the mid-size model being a bit of both.

Mini is for single handed use and great for reading novels

Pro is for two handed use and great for newspapers and comics

Air is a bit of both and balances portability with the above two

There is something magical about being able to touch the screen and see things respond directly to your touch. When I used my first light pen in the late 80s I was impressed but it was nothing like what we have now. I worry that people get a bit blasé about it with the near ubiquity of smartphones these days, but the fact remains the immersiveness you feel interacting with a touch device only draws you in more, the larger the screen is.

I use my laptop on the train a few hours each work day but primarily at my desk. I use my iPad on the couch or in a comfy chair. For reading Twitter, the newspaper, Instapaper, my RSS feeds, and just surfing the Internet the iPad Pro has been the best iPad yet for those tasks.

I thought that I would miss the one handed operation of the Mini but ultimately I just prop the Pro up on my leg or knee bent at a comfortable angle and don’t really hold it at all and I’ve been fortunate to spend a few hours in that position over the Christmas holidays and it hasn’t been an issue.

Video and audio playback is simply amazing with excellent bass reproduction and the volume can easily fill a small room. Much to be happy about there.

I’ve been avoiding using my iPad in bed for a few months now since I’ve trying to avoid artificial light before bed so that hasn’t been issue either. In short: one-handed operation of an iPad turns out to not be a big issue for me. Your mileage may vary.

Conclusion

There is no doubt that achieving a truly paperless office is a challenging task. Asking yourself the question: ‘do I really need that printout?' certainly helps, but truly collaborative software tools are only just now becoming available that allow the sorts of digital collaboration we need to bring ourselves over the line technologically speaking.

So long as organizations and legislators rely on wet ink-signatures, we’ll be stuck with paper. So long as employees are given laptops and not tablets and styluses for their jobs, we’ll be stuck with paper. Where we have a choice, or decide to draw a line and stump up our own funds to try and escape the shackles of the paper world and all of its flaws, I think going paperless is absolutely possible.

The iPad Pro and the Apple Pencil, in conjunction with GoodNotes has allowed me to completely ditch my written notebooks. I can search those notes with good accuracy, and I can double-touch type on the tablet with no external keyboard or special (heavier) cover required, at quite a respectable speed for the first time ever.

For me at least, I’ll be keeping this device and using it for my job every day, and for many days to come.

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[aviationfiction]

XXVI

Dante St. James

“Your total today is five thousand four hundred and thirty two dollars and forty cents. How will you be paying sir?” I passed my American Express Centurion card off to the Apple sales technician while doing my best to concentrate on the e-mail I’d opened up on my phone.

I achieved what I deemed to be the impossible by signing on Apple for the sake of collaborative work in public relations and marketing. Over the course of three days of grueling meetings with Tim Cook and a team of seven other executives, where I did far more listening than speaking, I presented arguably one of the best business proposals of my career in hopes of even having a narrow chance to work with the number one hardware company on the globe. Unlike anything I’ve ever dealt with before, I allowed them to pick apart every line, bullet point, concept, and strategy I mapped out for a time frame of five to seven years. Aside from internet fodder that anyone has access to and can speculate about, I’ve never been behind the scenes or apart of any of their immensely classified meetings for their highly renounced products so there was quite a bit of improvisation meshed in with a ton of research I’d done to pull together this vision for sole dominance in every promotional avenue possible. I’d always known Apple to be a easygoing company in terms of approach and marketing style, but the pensive expressions on their pale faces left three days worth of sweat beads trickling among my neck. I never expected the applause, smiles, handshakes, and even welcoming hugs I received once we were in agreement about figures and myself being the sole partner and consultant for the account on the A&M side. In two weeks, I’m heading out to their new multi billion dollar campus headquarters in Cupertino, California for an official welcome and tour of the state of the art facility.

“Would you like your receipt e-mailed to you, printed, or both?”

“Uh. Both, I guess.” I used my finger to sign my signature on the digital receipt and quickly responded to yet another one of Mike’s text messages summoning me to the nightclub. It was the third one he sent within the last half an hour so I have no choice but to rush over there. I’d already been on my way but decided to stop once I drove past an Apple store. I haven’t physically been with Autumn since the morning after my birthday celebration and that was eight days ago. That morning, we were playfully fondling one another and she dropped her iPad on the marble flooring in my apartment and shattered the screen. Though she shrugged it off and mumbled that she’d replace it at some point, I made a mental note to grab her another one whenever I passed by one of the simplistic yet easily noticeable stores in the city. While here, I remembered her saying she left her laptop in Miami so I had Megan, the sales tech, add in the latest Macbook Pro with the iPad Pro I’d already picked out. Of course, she wouldn't be a great saleswoman without finessing me into grabbing the Apple Pencil for the tablet, Apple Care for both products, and additional physical protective accessories.

“Well, here’s your receipt Dante. Thank you so much for shopping at Apple today.”

“Thank you. I appreciate your service. You were a great help today Megan.”

“You’re so very welcome.” I stuck the receipt down into the bag and pulled the strings on it until it was sealed while making my way out of the store and over to my Aston Martin. I didn’t have a chance to rest in the seat and get my seat belt on before Mike was sending over another text message pondering about my whereabouts and what was taking me so long. Just as I was about to laugh off his urgency as him being purposefully dramatic, his follow up message about Issac Dupont showing up caught me off guard and left me riddled with confusion as I took off into the traffic filled New York City streets. Over this week of being apart, Autumn and I spoke a few times through FaceTime and phone calls, but for these past three days of meetings our few text messages back and forth turned into silence on both ends as I became consumed in trying to close that Apple deal and her with taking on the role of planning Meridian’s annual Christmas party. I can recall just about every word of every conversation we’ve held over the week and aside from the Christmas party, she never mentioned Isaac so his pop up is certainly nothing more or less than random.

“Come on taxi driver.” A huff slipped past my lips while I watched him move at a snails pace to get back into the passenger seat of the mustard yellow vehicle and drive off. I’d been driving fifteen minutes longer than I should have been just to get to Chelsea. Rush hour would be starting in another two hours and yet traffic is already hell. It’s times like this when Mike’s persuasive rants about why I should buy a house in New Jersey enters my subconscious but when I add in the reality of myself living in such a large space alone just like he is, I toss his idea out of the imaginary window yet again. I have Marv for those days when my patience for these streets are thin.  

My car replaced the taxi driver’s in the usual spot I park in when I’m at the restaurant or club and I swiftly exited the vehicle. While adjusting my tie, I tossed the bag full of Apple products into the trunk of the car and disappeared behind the upper level golden door. As soon as I descending down the stairs, I spotted Issac standing at the bar with a glass of what I could tell was nothing more than juice and an expression of frustration written all over his face. Mike was no where in sight and that within itself was odd. He’s a people person and on any other day, he wouldn’t dare leaving anyone standing alone within our establishments if they were here to speak to Fredrick or myself. Something had to have been said or the vibe must have completely threw him off to the point of him needing to walking away.

“I’m not sure how long you’ve been waiting for me, but I’d just gotten out of a business meeting and I had something else to handle before I could make it over here. My apologies for the wait Isaac.” He nodded instead of acknowledging my sentiments verbally. His hand gripped the cocktail glass to the point of the tips of his fingers reddening and the tension radiating from his frame caused both of my eyebrows to rise in curiosity.

“You’re screwing my sister.” I’d pictured this moment in my head in multiple different scenarios but overall, I didn’t picture it happening one on one, nor with this type of response and yet I have no fear, hesitance, or doubt about myself or what I have with Autumn. If anything, I’m far more offended by what he assumes to be going on and how he’s belittled it to me using her for sex.

“Did she tell you that? I have to ask because if she did, I doubt she said it in such a shrewd and inaccurate manner.” Autumn’s the only person who I could assume would have told him about our relationship. No one on my end knows Isaac well enough to approach him with such information and despite his stares and what ideas he may have been concocting in that head of his, we’ve never done anything in front of him that pointed out what I believe is now the obvious. Autumn doesn’t speak to me in front of him unless he coerces her to do so and when she does, she refuses to make eye contact. Though it irritates the living hell out of me, she still references to me by last name in front of him, and we don’t communicate with one another on his company’s grounds. I considered sending her flowers just yesterday and I had to stop myself because there was a possibility that she would have either been flustered by such a risk or she would have been livid.

“Page Six. There was an article written about her that came out this morning. You know, though she may be in denial about it, people know who Autumn is. Whether she likes it or not, she has that cliche basketball wife title lingering over her head and it’ll be there forever. In the article it speaks about her being spotted around with a mystery man who she’s been seeing for months. In addition to that, it speaks about her being spotted leaving this nightclub hand in hand with said mystery man after his birthday festivities. Though the mystery man’s name isn’t mentioned, it is noted that he is said to be a wealthy and successful New York City business man. Based upon your file, your birthday was a few days ago right?” The glass rattled as it landed on the golden surface and splashes of it’s contents splattered around it.

“It was.” I slid my hands down into the pockets of my pants and my eyes narrowed at the way he was introducing this situation. I don’t read gossip sites. I don’t keep up with anyone’s business but my own and those around me and that’s to a certain extent. Sure, I’ve had articles written about me and there may have been a few on Page Six given that I’m a nightclub owner, but gossip? Never. Stacey would have told me. Surprisingly, I can’t believe I’m hearing this from him first. I don’t give a shit either way. Whether mystery man or Dante Elliott St. James is written all over the article, it doesn’t deter me from my everyday life and most of all, my woman.

“I’ve watched you and the manner in which you stare at her. I’ve questioned the random lies Rachel would tell me. Autumn’s budget reports from every trip taken would never make much sense but I sat on it and decided not to jump to conclusions although I should have.”

“Autumn and I grew close to one another and developed a bond that was not only undeniable, but also special. We didn’t expect to fall for one another but it happened. I believe that’s typically how natural attraction and acting on said attraction works. We got to know one another and in doing so, we continuously gravitated towards one another. Eventually that developed into the both of us wanting to be in a relationship.”

“A relationship?” His condescending laughter filled the space like something out of a movie. In all that he’d already said, I couldn’t exactly pinpoint what his anger was about and how he was going to go about handling it. His words don’t faze me, but the tension between he and Autumn affects her no matter how much she tries to brush it off as typical sibling friction. “Autumn just got a fucking divorce and you’re talking to me about a relationship with her. You have to be kidding me.”

“She got a divorce from a man that she wasn’t with for two years prior to the divorce. What’s your point?”

“I don’t think you know the details of Autumn and her poor choices in how she got into that marriage, what she gave up for that sham of a marriage, and the behaviors that she had while within what ended up being nothing more than bullshit.”

“I know everything.” I’m confident that there’s nothing he can say to me that she hasn’t already explained. She’s gone into detail about she and Andreas’ marriage in an approach that I never thought she would do it in. No woman has ever shared the inner workings of the former relationships or current relations with me in such a manner, not even Stacey. She took a raw approach and allowed me into the six years of her life she spent with and without him in such a vivid manner that I was left sympathetically wallowing in her sorrows and yet still trying to figure out how he could give up on someone who stood by and believed in him and them despite the toxicity of their union. I know enough to hear the pain within her voice lingering in my mind as I stare at her only living sibling who refuses to relinquish the pain of the past and move forward in a positive manner.

“Then what the hell are you doing?”

“Issac, I’m lost. What are you getting at?”

“She’s your flight attendant. Do you realize that?”

“Yeah.” I didn’t mean to shrug my shoulders so nonchalantly. It happened out of a reflex and that seemingly set him off even more.

“She doesn’t have shit going for herself. This is what I’ve spoken about with Autumn multiple times and she refuses to get it. She’s reckless, impulsive, erratic, and she lives her life in the moment. I should have known that she would do this shit once she started working for you because that’s just who she is. Instead of getting her life together, now she’s with you and you’re financing her. That’s not helping Autumn grow. You’re enabling her to be everything that she was with him and that resulted in her being a failure in so many aspects. You want that on your hands?” He’d officially put me into a maze and I was mentally trying to figure out every direction to take without insulting this man and yet every fiber of my being was in defense mode for all that he had to say about a relationship he knows nothing about and the woman that the both of us loves. Love makes this far more complicated than I need it to be because I can’t figure out a boundary.

“I’m not enabling anything. What is it with you and your negative outlook on everything that she does? Why are you so affected by the decisions that she chooses to make for her life? How is any of it hurting you? The past is the past. She’s no longer married and she’s moving on with her life. You have to allow her to do that in whatever capacity that she chooses to do so. You’re treating her and speaking on her as if she’s just gotten out of prison after committing a heinous act. She’s not a criminal Issac. She’s a human being that made very human choices. She’s doing so much better and I believe you know that, but you’re holding a grudge against her so this is how you’re getting back at her I suppose.”

“I’m not getting back at her. I want what’s best for her.”

“And you think I don’t?”

“You don’t know her.”

“By the way you’re speaking about her I’m more prone to believe that currently, I know her better than you do. This isn’t a competition for me by the way. She’s your sister. We play two different roles in her life and much like yourself, I only want and encourage Autumn to be and have the best. The progression that she’s made as a person is nothing less than incredible and you should be proud of her. The manner in which she handles her job and the way she respects the dignity of your company should tell you how much she loves and respects you. She’s precise, a quick thinker, and extremely intelligent. I don’t even think she recognizes how intelligent she truly is. I’m not enabling anything because she won’t allow me to do it nor will she allow you all to do it. I’ve spoken with your mother and one of the things she spoke with me about is how stubborn and headstrong Autumn is about getting her life together on her own terms without handouts from anyone. If she’s not letting you all get in the way of that, what makes you think she’s going to allow me to do so? She’s happier. She’s laughing more and living her life. She’s lost so much and she’s pushing forward. Give her a pat on the back for it. Why the hell would you continuously kick her down?”

“You said it yourself, my mother described her as stubborn and headstrong. Shane was always the one to enable the parts of Autumn that are erratic and all over the place while I was the one who pushed for her to stay focused on what matters.”

“And her being happy personally doesn’t matter?”

“It’s secondary.”

“That’s not for you to determine. That’s also a fucked up way of thinking, by the way.”

“What’s for me to determine is her working for me and being romantically involved with a client which is inappropriate. I’ve dealt with tons of unnecessary drama because of bullshit like that and the last person I want to deal with that from is my sister.”

“You’re not going to deal with that on this end because my personal life is exactly that. No offense to you, but I don’t see a reason to involve you or anyone else in it. Our work situations are irrelevant. I’m not stepping on your toes or hers. If she quit today, that wouldn’t change anything. I’m not out to hurt or make a fool out of your sister. I’m not that guy. I’m not Andreas either and right now, you’re speaking to me like I’m him.” Autumn’s purposeful distance from her family and their lack of truly getting to know her ex-husband has left all of them with resentment towards him that they’ve never been able to express to the person responsible for it. Though Autumn believes Isaac anger is all in reference to what she didn’t do professionally and her lack of attendance at his wedding, I know the majority of it is pent up emotions towards the man who hurt her in so many ways for so long. I’d feel the same way if I had a sister and she unraveled mentally and physically because of pain being inflicted upon her. Unfortunately, I cannot resolve those issues for any of them. All I can do is be an upstanding man for Autumn and take care of her in the manner that the guy before me didn’t.

“You’re not Andreas, but you’re coming too soon after Andreas.”

“That’s not for you to determine Isaac.” My shrug was intentionally this time. He cannot speak for her and I’m not going to allow him to. This is no Romeo and Juliet, forbidden love story.

“Is it that good?” He stood up straight and my condescending snicker eventually turned into a deep frown as his question replayed in my head.

“This is your sister we’re speaking about right now. Show her some respect.”

“Show me some respect.”

“I’m respecting you by entertaining a conversation that we technically don’t need to be having. Despite how you may feel or what you do or don’t want, I don’t have to ask for your permission to be in a relationship with Autumn. I don’t even have to ask you for her hand in marriage if that should come about between she and I. I’d like for you and I to get along as professionals and personally as well, but it’s not on me at this point. There’s no hostility on my end and I doubt there ever will be, unless it’s necessary. I love your sister and I’d rather not hear some type of if I love her, I’ll let her go and allow her to get her life together type of ultimatum because that’s not going to happen. Her life is together. She’s breathing, living, and progressing at her own pace. Whether that is or isn’t good enough for you, that’s perfect for me.”

“You love her?” I don’t know if my eyes deceived me when I noticed a bit of the tension in his shoulders loosening or if it was simply my emotions being in overdrive about a genuine truth I admitted to Isaac before I expressed it to the woman of my affections. I had to let it out one way or another and I didn’t want him to leave here today thinking anything less than that.

“I love her.”

Silence loomed between the two of us and our staring match didn’t falter as we remained in the same spots we’d been in throughout the entire exchange. There seemed to be nothing more to say and Issac proved that to be true when he grabbed the glass filled with cranberry juice, tossed all of it back into his throat as if were the most potent shot we serve, and walked past me to make his exit. As I began my walk to the office, I could hear the door close behind him and the tension he filled into the place left with him.

“What did he say to you?” Mike didn’t bother turning to face me. He was focused on the security monitors in front of him and whatever he was concentrated on was far more important than him turning to face me with silly banter or our usual manner of greeting one another.

“What?”

“You usually stick around if we have someone coming in for a meeting if Fredrick and I aren’t here yet. You’re courteous. What happened?”

“I wasn’t texting you about Issac Dupont being here. He just so happened to show up so I let you know. I also didn’t stick around with him because I was consumed with this shit. I had to come back in here to make sure I saw what I saw. Have you heard about or seen this shit?” He finally up glanced at me.

“Seen what?”

“This shit from the night of your birthday.” His finger tapped a button to rewind footage from the outdoor camera and he quickly stopped on a specific time frame. “You know I tend to go through the footage just to make sure things are flowing correctly and to catch whatever I wasn’t able to see while being consumed with whatever is happening in the moment. This shit threw me off. Look at this and tell me what you see.”

He pressed play and my stomach instinctively tightened at the sight of my brother and Autumn being within inches of one another. A force within me caused me to lean forward to get a better look at the monitor and I watched as he spoke to her. There was no way possible that I’d be able to make out what he was saying because the camera wasn’t zoomed in enough. Though I cannot read lips from a side profile, I could easily sense whatever was pouring out of his mouth was insolent because that’s all he knows how to be.

“Rewind it just a few seconds.” Mike did as I instructed and I watched Autumn flinch. She flinched at least twice. “Rewind it again.”

She flinched three times and took a step forward to create space between their bodies as she responded to him. Matthew invaded her space within a second of her moving and fury filled my core as I watched his fingers trail up the back of her thigh.

“You seen that shit right?”

“Rewind it again.” I watched it over and over again; at least eight times to take in every single minute, second, and millisecond of the man that is supposed to be my brother, intimidating and sexually harassing my woman. She’d gone from flinching, to frowning, to a chilling blank stare as she froze in place in reaction to his fingers igniting a fear within her.

“Dante…”

“Rewind it.”

I tortured my mind once more; further worsening the vexing of my being. What I felt was like anything I’d ever experienced before. I could feel a fire flushing through my veins and viciously creeping up every inch of spine, as the acidity residing in my stomach awaited the moment for me to allow it to flow out of my mouth by the way of a verbal attack. Every muscle in my face tightened in unison with my jaw and lastly, my fists balled to the point of aching as I glanced at Mike.

“Take a ride with me.”

Mike’s words of rationality were on deaf ears as I tried to the best of my ability not to test out the two hundred mile per hour speed maximum my car has the capability of doing to quicken the drive to Richard and Elizabeth’s Scarsdale, New York home. Between the traffic on the Bronx River Parkway and the sound of my horn irritating me far more than it did the drivers I was trying to rush out my way, the rage within me worsened beyond my control and was far beyond whatever influence to calm down Mike could get into my irrational mind.

“Dante!”

I didn’t bother with properly parking the car as I snatched the key out of the ignition and slid out of the drivers side. I left Mike to fend for himself.

For the first time in all of the years they’ve had their home, I used the key I’d been given to open up the door. The first person in my line of view was my mother and her olive green eyes lit up in glee at the sight of my presence.

“Hi sweetheart.”

“Where the fuck is he?” Her gleam dimmed instantly and confusion filled her expression as I brushed past her to find the source of my wrath.

“Who?”

Richard’s laughter from the kitchen gave away their location and my heart thrashed against my chest as my lungs tightened because of the pace I’d chosen to move in. Matthew’s position was on a stool at the kitchen’s island and I didn’t bother with any words as my fist connected with his jaw. I lost the ability to have visuals and detection of my surroundings. My mind strayed from the capability to exude logic and reasoning in my actions. The adrenaline within my frame heightened and the mission of my hands and feet was to destroy the source of my outrage. The piercing screens of the woman who birthed me and the stern voice of the man who helped her did nothing to stop the blows I was inflicting upon him and the few he was landing on me in self-defense and retaliation. I’d had many moments over our years of growing up together when I wanted to do nothing more than throw a punch in his direction for his bullshit and there were a few times during my pre-teen years when I actually wanted him to beat me down one good time so he’d finally get those resenting emotions out and be done with it. Though the spats were often and the violence was non-existent, I quietly knew one day it would happen. I could never pinpoint exactly when nor what it would be over, but of all the opposing things that have been said and done between the two of us, him violating Autumn supersedes all of it.

“Dante stop it!”

I could taste my own blood as it gushed from the inside of my mouth and rather than that being the signal to end the onslaught of blows, I spat it on him in hope that such a disrespectful gesture would further entice him to continue warring with me.

“That pussy must be phenomenal.” He could barely let out his laughter through his rigged breathing and I took a chance on my harshly aching hand. He avoided one fist only to collide with another and a black haze hovered over me as our bodies crashed into the island and glass went shattering.

Richard’s arms were tightly wrapped around my body; just about cutting off my air supply and signifying that a few of the blows Matthew landed on me did damage somewhere within my rib cage. I’d underestimated the strength within his sixty year old frame as he pulled me away from his son and put enough distance between us so the scuffle could finally end.

“This shit isn’t over. I’ll catch you slipping again and I swear on my life if you utter another word to her I’ll finish you off.”

“Alright Dante man, that’s enough.” It was the first time Mike said anything since my exit from the car. I hadn’t even noticed he came inside.

“Say to who? What is hell is going on here?” I thought Richard would be amused by such a moment between the two of us. He thrives off of the competition he created and gets joy out of making sure to keep the both of us humbled by slyly knocking one down for the other; it mostly being me. I figured he’d let us go at it until I was near the point of being in a casket. That just tells me I’d done enough damage to Matthew to alarm him.

“Get the fuck off of me.” I felt more pain in snatching myself out of Richard’s grasp than I did when those punches were landing on me. The shrilling sound of my mother’s voice calling for me was an afterthought as I made my way through the halls and out of the door. I didn’t want to spend another minute in that residence if I wasn’t going to be able to finish what I came to do.

“I’m driving you to the hospital.” Mike held my keys in his hands as I pressed against the drivers side of the car and I quickly shook my had to negate that.

“I don’t need a hospital. I’m fine.”

“Your mouth is gushing blood. You’re going to need stitches somewhere in there. We’re going. Get in.” I didn’t bother to argue with him about it as I slid into the car on the passenger size. I couldn’t. All I planned to do today was pick up Autumn, take her out for lunch at her favorite pizza spot, and head home so we could spend some time together until we fly out to Turks and Caicos tomorrow. When they say life throws you curve balls, I certainly experienced that today but I don’t regret anything. The conversation with Isaac was necessary and beating the shit out of my brother had to happen. There was nothing to talk about between he and I because there is nothing that I can say to him that will get through that demented mind he has.

From the moment a friendship developed between the two of us, I never wanted Autumn to meet my family. I was unnerved when we were conversing in Miami and she revealed that Matthew flirts with everyone at Blue Star and Meridian, despite having a wife. Though she didn’t elaborate on it, I wanted to be informed about his exact words to her so that I could put them to a stop immediately. At the time, it was less about myself and more about him being a vulture with no regard or respect for women; that aspect of him seems to be six feet under with his mother. Richard’s already paid to sweep two sexual harassment accusations about him under the rug and tossed under the table money at a number of news reporting publications to keep it out of their news reports. I’ve never sexually glanced at, lusted over, or flirted with a single employee since the day I was officially brought on board despite the advances, blatant staring, and supposedly innocent offers for lunch. I didn’t and still don’t want my brother’s reputation and the last thing I want to do is lay with the same women he’s been with.

Because there was only footage, I don’t know what he said to Autumn but his body language expressed his lust loudly. I’m not surprised by that because I expect it not only from him but from just about every man that encounters her whether taken or not. Her presence stops movement within rooms. Her beauty turns the head of bother genders. In all the times that we’ve been out and about somewhere on this continent, I’ve observed men reacting to her. My presence hindered their approach. I observed my own colleagues undressing and eye-fucking her at my birthday party when they assumed I wasn’t looking and though he's my brother, he's as much of a stranger to me as they are. I always expect the worse from Matthew, but I can take his ignorance. I’ll never allow him to direct that in Autumn’s direction. I will ruin his life before it ever gets that far.

“You feel better?” I don’t know how long Mike had been standing there watching us but he did absolutely nothing to stop the altercation and I’m amused and appreciative of it. He could have never shown me the footage. He could have  chosen to never take the ride with me. He could have done his best to stop me from getting into that door but he did nothing. I’m now prone to believe he wanted all of it to happen because he too has a disdain for Matt. Had it been anyone else, Mr. Zen would have talked me out of it.

“I feel good enough.”

“Here man. Put this up to your face.” He passed me the hoodie he’d been wearing and I did as he instructed to save the interior of my car from bloodstains that a thorough detailing wouldn’t even be able to erase.

“Hopefully there aren’t a lot of people in the emergency room and they can take you right in. You have all of your information in your wallet? Insurance and shit?”

“Yeah, it’s on me. My fucking rib cage has this piercing pain. He kept punching me there.”

“Body blows. He was trying to get you to stop. You fucked him up though. I’ll tell you that much. Your Jon B ass face only has one bruise on it and then there’s the lip. I think it’s split from the inside.”

“I can feel it.”

“They’ll probably do a few stitches. I called Autumn by the way.” I quickly whipped my head in his direction and frowned at random revelation. “I didn’t know what you were going to do so I called her because you weren’t going to listen to me and I kind of didn’t want you to, so I was going to let her be your voice of reason but by the time I got inside, it was too late.”

“So why did you call her?”

“You were going to have to explain yourself one way or another.”

He pulled the car over at the White Plains Hospital emergency room entrance so I wouldn’t have to make the trek with him from the parking lot and I headed inside to resister myself to receive some type of service. Either they were having a slow day or my lip looked worse than I thought because they offered to take me in and have registration done from an examination room. I’ve never been a fan of going to the doctors or having people putting their hands all over me for whatever reason it may be, so the nurses and doctor checking my vitals, cleaning my lip and bruised cheek, and constantly asking me questions that I didn’t care to answer ruined my calm.

“They’re going to do x-rays of your face and your rib cage.” Mike felt compelled to finally glance up from his GQ magazine to make his presence known despite seeing me exasperated by all that continued to go on around me. I’d heard the doctor loud and clear for that part. Him speaking about the swelling in my lip and the bruising on my rib cage entered one ear and went right out of the other because I was too focused on my phone to truly pay attention and the pain killer administered by the nurse probably played it’s part in that too. Medicine is another thing that I dislike but the sensitivity and pain I felt with every move I made outweighed my ego.

“Is he in here?” My head rose at the sound of a voice I not only wasn’t expecting but most of all didn’t want to hear and I huffed once she drew the curtain back and stared at me with a frown on her face that I hadn’t seen since I threw a football and shattered the glass of her china cabinet when I was twelve. It’s moments like this when I lean in the direction of her possibly loving me but then I have to realize that at some point during whatever conversation we choose to have, she’s going to tread in an area that will further enlighten me on how much she actually doesn’t. I’ve yet to figure out what she feels. Is she indebted to me because I passed through her birth canal or am I something to gloat about when she’s draped in diamonds and furs while having pretentious tea parties with the women she deems to be her friends? Am I a physical example of the love that she shares with her husband or am I the nuisance that mistakenly became of it?

“What the hell has gotten into you?” I didn’t expect her to ask about my health, how I felt, and if everything was alright. I’d did some damage to her kitchen, disrespected her home, and most of all attacked the child that she caters too most although he’s technically not hers. I crossed a couple of lines. “Do you hear me speaking to you?”

“I don’t have to answer to you.”

“Dante Elliott St. James, you broke his nose, blacked his eye, and chipped one of his teeth.”

“That’s it?” My attempt to smirk was far more painful than I needed it to be but I still did it just enough to further nettle her.

“I don’t know. That’s all the doctor has said thus far. You can please talk to me about what caused all of that? I really want to understand what brought you to the point of violence. That’s not like you.” I didn’t bother to answer because she’ll never understand me. She never has. Our conversations have always been one sided and filled with her opinions and emotions on who I am and the state of our relationship. She’s never gravitated towards my side no matter how I felt or how valid my points were. She thought I could handle it all and eventually, it didn’t matter to her anymore which is why I was shipped off to London. I don’t ever recall having a heart to heart with my mother because she’s oblivious to what doesn’t directly affect her. For as long as I was laced in designer clothing, sleeping in a bedroom filled with whatever I supposedly wanted, fed, attending the best schools, and not punching holes through walls and breaking laws like Matthew, I was fine in her eyes. I accepted my black sheep position within the St. James family and I’ve been living it for thirty years. I’m fine with it at this point, for as long as they stay out of my personal space, and that’s a boundary that they’re respecting less and less these days.

“You alright in here?” Richard stepped beyond the curtain and took a good look at me. As he stood there with his hands stuffed down into the pockets of his slacks, I nodded and returned my attention to the unanswered text messages on my screen. Autumn hadn’t responded to the two I sent and I didn’t know whether to be worried or panicked.

“I didn’t know you could fight.”

“Richard. Please. Okay?” Her hand quickly flew up to cease his amusement and she stared at me with disdain while awaiting an explanation that was never going to happen. She stood there staring at me for so long that her companion walked away and left her to it.

“Dante. Fighting is not you. Is it really over a woman?”

“Ask him.”

I finally decide to properly utilize the bed and I laid back against it’s uncomfortable surface. My body was giving in to the potent pill’s side effects no matter how much I fought against it and I suddenly felt like I weighted far more than I actually do. The last thing I remember was Mike warning me that my sleep wouldn’t be long.

I only hoped that it would be long enough for her to have left my personal space.

“Mr. St. James. We’re going to stitch your lip now. You may not remember because you quite groggy but we did the x-rays. There are no fractures in your face nor are there any fractures or bruises within your rib cage. You most likely pulled a muscle. There’s really nothing we can do about that other than letting it heal and that should take about a week or two. You’ll probably feel some pain when you take deep breaths and during movement, so we’ll prescribe some ibuprofen to help with that. Take them as needed. Ice packs help and most of all, rest. If you can get some rest for a couple of days, that should do you some good. You have a pretty deep cut in the inside portion of your lower lip. We’re going put about four or five sutures in there and that should heal within two weeks. You can either come back to the hospital or go to your primary care doctor to have those sutures removed. Do you understand?” I don’t remember the x-rays or the length of time that I slept. It didn’t feel like a long or short length of time. I oddly felt like I was out of it and like I could do nothing more than let whatever was happening take it’s course.

“Does he ice his lip as well?” Her soothing voice filled my ears and for the rest time in hours, the tension in my body subsided and chills trickled along my spine and the nape of my neck. My eyelids shot open and my head twisted in search of her physical form and I found the other worldly beauty standing along side the bed and glancing down at me in a distressed state. The frown on her face filled me with guilt and yet I could still do nothing more than admire the beautiful presence that stood in an establishment full of life and death.

“He can, if he wants to.” I placed my hand on hers as it held onto the railing of the bed and she immediately laced our fingers together. She didn't bid me a smile. Her eyes were scolding me for my actions and most of all for being in such a place for all the wrong reasons, in her opinion.

“Did you just get here?”

“I’ve been here for twenty minutes.” We were unexpectedly alone; no Mike. He mostly likely left so I could feel her wrath on my own. Her piercing eyes were filled with the beauty that they always contain but the pain in looking at me a bit bruised up slightly overshadowed it. Still, she said nothing. She simply held my hand while her eyes followed the doctors every move to make sure he handing my lip properly. She questioned every move he made from the shot of Lidocaine he injected into my lip for numbing to the type of stitches he’d be using so I wouldn’t have any allergic reactions.

“Everything looks good Mr. and Mrs. St. James. The nurse will bring back two prescriptions for you; one is an antibiotic to prevent any potential infections and the other is for the pain. You’ll also get a couple of papers with some instructions for taking care of that lip. Then you’ll sign your discharge documents and you’re free to go.”

“I appreciate all your help.”

“It was my pleasure.” He closed the curtain to give us privacy as Autumn shook her head and grabbed my face to exam the bruise on my cheek.

“Mike told them that I was your wife so they’d let me in.”

“I figured it was something like that. Where is he?”

“He went to get a cup of coffee from the cafeteria.”

“Did you see my parents?”

“No.” That was exact the answer that I wanted to hear.

“Baby, I’m okay. You don’t have to stare at me like I’m not going to get up and walk out of this bed within the next ten minutes.”

“But you’re not okay. The last time we were on FaceTime with one another, you were okay. Right now, you’re laying here with a bruise on your cheek, a busted lip, and your chest is hurting. That doesn’t sound like someone who’s okay to me Dante.” There it was. The contempt written all over her face had finally come out of her mouth and I grimaced at the tone she chose to use. I knew she’d be upset but not to this capacity.

“I’m fine Autumn.”

“Okay.” Her lips thinned as she pursed them together. She still held onto my hand while awaiting the nurses arrival but she had nothing else to say to me. Her silence disgruntled me more than it should have and had the nurse and Mike not broken it within minutes, I’m certain an argument would have happened in the midst of myself trying to get her to speak to me.

“All set?” Mike bought a hospital t-shirt from the gift shop for me to wear home because my white Tom Ford shirt was no longer wearable. He’d also gotten me a milkshake to cure the hunger I hadn’t even complained about just yet.

“I am. How’d you get here?” Autumn flung her bag over her shoulder and grabbed the plastic bag containing my now ruined shirt and the papers I’d left on the bed.

“Glen. He dropped me off.”

“Autumn if I drive back to the club so I can get to my car, will you drive him to get the prescriptions and then to his apartment?”

“Yeah, that’s no problem at all.”

“I can drive. I feel fine.” I wasn’t as groggy as I felt prior to falling asleep. Sure I was still sightly floating but it was manageable.

“They gave you Vicodin for the pain. You’re not driving anywhere.”

Suddenly my best friend and girlfriend felt like my parents as they left me to trail behind them while they discussed my state and just how I’d be looked after for the time being. There was no room for me to give any input because Autumn had no interest in hearing me out and Mike kept his attention on her out of respect and probably intimidation that he wouldn’t admit to having. While in the car, Autumn sat in the backseat so I’d have the option of stretching my legs out and we barely had anything to say to one another for the forty five minute drive back into the busy streets of Manhattan.

“I’ll call you and check on you tonight. Alright?” Mike extended his fist in my direction and I bumped it with my own and gave him a nod of my head.

“Thanks for rolling with me.”

“Where else would I be? Besides, I’m posting that shit on World Star Hip-Hop.” I smirked because the pain would have been unbearable if I laughed. Hell, it would have been unbearable if I winced in response to the pain from the laughter.

“Make sure they cut a check first.”

“Aye, you know me. I always make sure the numbers are right. Rest up brother.” Once he was out of the drivers seat and outside of the car, he the shut the door and had yet another brief conversation with Autumn about God knows what. I didn’t care to ease drop. Not only did I want to do nothing more than go to sleep, but I was more focused on making it to the pharmacy so I could fill those prescriptions before whatever they gave me in the hospital wore off.

“What pharmacy do you usually go to?” I looked on as she put her seat belt on and shrugged in honesty. I don’t have a specific pharmacy. The last time I filled a prescription was three years ago and I wasn’t even in New York when I did it.

“I think I have an account with Walgreen. So we can stop by any one of them.”

“Okay.” Silence again. At every red light, she fingers tapped on the steering wheel in aggravation and refused to look at me no matter how many times I adjusted myself in the seat just to draw her attention. Though she’d consider the figure fitting black maxi dress and the white Converses she paired with it as something she just threw on, I was left to just about drool over how it hugged every curve and crevice of her unrivaled form. My mind transitioned to lust filled thoughts of all the ways I wanted her once we were in the privacy of my apartment. Fuck the pain. She’d cure it.

“So you’re going to give me the silent treatment for the rest of the day?”

“What do you want me to say Dante?” I’ve never been indifferent about my name until now. It flowed from her lips with venom.

“What exactly are you mad about?”

“You can’t be serious right now, right?” Her laughter was filled with disbelief and hints of emotional exhaustion. “You fought your brother and based upon what Mike explained, it was over me. Do you think I’m going to approve of that? I don’t ever want you fighting and especially over me. You can’t even go to work. Look at your face. Just imagine what they’re going to say around that building if they find out that you two were at one another in such a capacity. You’re so much more rational than that and you posses more logic than most people do. I’m pissed that you felt compelled to do that. I don’t want to be the cause of you doing that type of shit.” My attention left her and my eyes panned over the melting pot of humans walking along the sidewalks. I heard every word she said and yet they’re probably the most pointless ones she’d expressed to me since we met.

“What did he whisper in your ear?” I needed to hear the answer to that more than anything else she has to say about what happened.

“I’m not telling you. Why, so you can go and start another round? Your brother is an asshole. You know that much better than I do. He said some asshole shit and I’m sure you know that based upon what you saw. I didn’t feed into it. That’s really all I have to say about it.” My body straightened in the seat and I whipped my head back in her direction. Her dismissal of my question was fuel thrown on the budding fire between the two of us.

“What did he say Autumn? And why didn’t you tell me what happened in the first place? After I parked the car and returned to you, you pretended like everything was just fine although that shit happened. Why wasn’t I notified of it then?”

“Because everything was just fine. That didn’t ruin my night and I wasn’t about to let it ruin yours. Don’t turn me into a villain because I didn’t want to ruin my man’s birthday with his brother’s bullshit. We were having a good time and we continued to do so even after they left. We went home that night in peace. That’s what the night was about. Should I have enticed you to swing on the man then? In front of your colleagues and friends? Be realistic.” She parked the car on the corner of Broadway and pointed at the Walgreen down the street. There was no way possible she’d be able to move closer to it.

“You should have told me. We’re honest with one another. We’ve been that way since the start so why would you ever feel compelled to keep something from me, especially some shit like that. How am I supposed to feel?”

“Spared. Give me the prescriptions and I’m going to need your identification and insurance card. I’m not sure if they’re going to give it to me but we’ll see. If not, you’re going to have to go inside.” She held her hand out for the papers that were resting on my lap and I didn’t budge. Yet again an answer of hers was the complete opposite of what I was looking for and didn’t make much sense in reference to this situation.

“Spared? Spared of what? I’ve been dealing with him since I was three years old. You’re not sparing me from anything, but I’m so glad that you thought one night would make all the difference.”

“Great. I’m so glad to know that you don’t appreciate the effort I put forth in trying to make sure your thirtieth birthday went smoothly. You’re welcome.” She reached over and swiftly snatched everything off my lap. I was on the verge of biting my lip to refrain from responding but the swelling and unpleasant sting of the sutures halted me. Her attitude didn’t falter as she reached between the two front seats and snatched her neon green bag out of the backseat. As she requested, I handed over what she asked of me.

“Don’t try to paint it as me being unappreciative because we both know that isn’t the case. It’s about me looking out for you. Is that not what I’m supposed to do? You were looking out for me right, so am I not allowed to reciprocate that?”

My question went unanswered just as the others did. I didn’t expect her to welcome me with open arms and applaud my actions. I know who she is and what is inexcusable by her standards though I firmly stand by my actions and the reasons why they took place. She’s protective of those that she cares and she would have taken a swing at Matthew for me before she ever encouraged me to do it for her. She’s a giver and not much of a taker. She compromises and sacrifices far more than she ever should have to. She’d deal with Matthew’s ignorance for the sake of sparing me of it even if it’s for a night but I can’t respect or fall in line with her not allowing me to play my part in my half of our relationship. I’m protective of those that I love and care about. I’m a giver. I know how to compromise and make sacrifices. I will go to war with whoever for the sake of sparing those that I love from pain and disrespect, especially when they’re innocent. Matthew targeting her wasn’t an indirect attack on me, it was as direct as he can possibly get it.

I had a twenty minute conversation with Stacey, who wanted every single detail down to the attire I was wearing during the altercation, and Autumn still didn’t return until ten minutes after my phone call ended. While waiting for the prescription to be filled, she went shopping in the store for at least four bags worth of products. The drive to my apartment sounded like typical medication commercial where the pros and the cons of whatever pill is being advertised. She ran down every possible side effect of the typically prescribed pain killers and had even purchased an over the counter substitute if they should start effecting me negatively. She didn’t stop when we were walking into the building I reside in and nor did her medication talk cease while we were taking the elevator up to my apartment. I would have rather her continue giving me the silent treatment instead of her suddenly morphing into a walking pharmacist who had nothing better to do other than to speak about work.

“I bought you some ice packs. I’m going to put them into the freezer now and once they’re nice and cold, you should put them on your chest to keep the swelling down and for pain relief. I’ll make you a sandwich or something to hold you over until I cook something. You need to take the medicine before whatever they gave you at the hospital completely wears off.”  

“I spoke with your brother today.” She halted once she opened the freezer and eventually nodded her head as she tossed the gel filled plastic pads inside of it.

“Yes, I know. You’ve had quite an eventful day. He cursed me out twice.” Her starting sarcasm wasn’t enough to obscure what she mentioned immediately after it.

“He cursed you out?”

“Twice.” Her verification came with a smirk and those scolding eyes she’s been giving me since I opened my own in that stale examination emergency room pierced through me. Her frustration was clear, as was mine, but hers stole her cool and has had her zipping around like a bee and lost in her thoughts since she arrived to be by my side.

“I didn’t know he would show up. He began speaking about some Page Six story and…” before I could finish the rest of my statement, she interjected it for her own.

“And you confirmed it.”

“Was I supposed to lie?”

“You were supposed to wait until I was ready to tell him.”

“And when would that have been? When we’re married?” The statement flew out of mouth before I could regain control over my discontentment with her mood and the day. My shoulders sunk in unison with my internal thoughts and emotions as I watched her eyebrows rise in response to my words.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t intend for that to come out that way. I apologize baby.”

“Right.”

“Autumn.” My sigh was loud and I rested my elbows on the island as she rummaged through the fridge for the ingredients to put together my favorite type of sandwich.

“You should just stop talking. That works too.”

I took her advice.

We were trapped in our thoughts as she continued on with her task without much regard or acknowledgement of my presence. Once the pills were down my throat, she sent me off to the bedroom with the plate and a bottle of Gatorade to wash it down with. My attempt at a nap was a failure until she adjusted the pillows on the bed for the sake of my comfort, positioned the ice packs on my chest, and shut the redundant ESPN off so I would stop distracting myself. I yearned for her to lay beside me but it was a wish not granted. I craved her lips on mine, but I’d seen more of her back as she walked away from me than her beautiful face and perfectly shaped supple lips. I desired her touch, but all I was left with was the sound of her being everywhere within my home except where I was.

And still, she looked after me.

I love her and I know now more than ever that she is on the same accord.

She showed me better than she could tell me.

That’s an honor I’ll defend at any given moment.

#j. cole fanfic #j cole fanfic #j. cole fanfiction #j cole fanfiction #fanfiction #fan fiction #fanfic #rihanna fanfic #rihanna fanfiction

[katescreatorscollective-blog]

Artist Spotlight: Rose Lusk

(From an interview with close friend and talented artist Rose Lusk on why she makes digital art)

Rose is an artist based out of Flagstaff, Arizona and has shared an EXCLUSIVE interview for all of my adoring readers/art fans).

When did you get into digital art?

“I’ve been working with digital media since I was about twelve, mainly because I loved the use of it in animation, but over time the malleability of photoshop and illustrator made me fall in love with it. Eventually I got in the habit of only using photoshop and experimenting lightly with physical work and after making a good balance with different types of 2D art I tried out more styles with digital art and it eventually became my favorite medium.”

What do you use for your art?

“When I first started drawing I used just a classic keyboard and mouse until I got a wacom bamboo tablet (a basic one that didn’t even have pen sensitivity) eventually saving up for a Wacom Intuos Pro Medium and that’s when I realized how much I wanted to draw 24/7, working with Photoshop and Illustrator to draw simple themes and characters that I used for years. Less than a year ago I got an 11 inch iPad Pro and Apple Pencil, using simply Adobe sketch but I’m considering getting ProCreate actually very soon. In all honesty Adobe Sketch is a fairly competent piece of software for being free, but I’m ready to get into something more technical.”

What inspires your art?

“The internet has always been a huge inspiration for me, initially wanting to draw more from animations on Newgrounds and Youtube than anything else, and seeing how close they were to TV Cartoon quality. Once I started actually drawing more and learning more about the internet, my largest inspiration was the Newgrounds animator Egoraptor, eventually that made me fall in love with the let’s play channel Game Grumps, encouraging me to make my own content and put it online (yikesl) and that strengthened my art because I kept making thumbnails for videos, art for youtube, etc. Skipping over a lot, I eventually got a twitter that put me out to way more art, and on top of that I started listening to Gorillaz, who’s combination of digital art and music was a huge inspiration for me, and music (mostly new stuff found online) helped inspire me a lot more now than it ever had. Musicians like Rav, Jakey, Snail’s House, and Leon Chang all inspired me to make pieces on their own, Rav in particular being a muse for more of the art I make digitally. Other than that there are plenty of artists I follow online that make me want to branch out more into things that aren’t just fan art.” 

Does the internet impact how you share your work?

“The internet has been the easiest method to put my art out, but that doesn’t mean it’s not hard as *** to maneuver around. There’s so much on the internet that it’s hard to find a footing if you aren’t an extreme niche. I sell most of my art online out of all the art I sell. While it’s hard to get it out there and actually get people to buy my stuff I’m super grateful for the accessibility that the internet has for putting out art. Between online apparel suppliers like teespring/redbubble or online storefronts like etsy, I feel like I can actually put my foot in the door in regards to selling my art, and that’s such a reassuring thought.”

Here are some pieces from one of her recent projects based on colorful poisons and acids:

Solanine is the green agent in potatoes that makes the ‘eyes’ of potatoes poisonous.

Lycopene is an acid that gives certain fruits a red/pink coloring.

Aconitine is the pigment that gives the (very) poisonous Nightshade plant its purple hue.

These prints can be bought as shirts on Teespring:

solanine ( https://teespring.com/solanine-green?pid=212)

lycopene (https://teespring.com/lycopene-pink#pid=212&cid=5819&sid=front)

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Week Overview

This week has been relatively good to me honestly. I’ve probably had more good than bad happen. Even if I did stress out pretty bad sometimes. I’m going to start chronologically as much as possible. 

Friday: In the morning I was about to go to Target, and thought my boyfriend wanted to come because we always grocery shop together but he didn’t so I went alone. Which is fine, I enjoy shopping alone because I can take my time. While sitting in the parking lot, someone who lived in one of the buildings asked me for a ride to Stop and Shop so she didn’t have to take the bus. She is a very nice, old black woman and I’ve met her previously. I agreed to take her and we talked along the way. I suppose this was my good deed for the day. After I got paid, I ordered HTV sheets online for my shirts and it was a relatively good price and they were apparently way better quality than the ones I was using. I also ordered some skincare products from Elf because they’re products are not only amazing, but affordable too. It was only $15 for 5 products and I figured I needed some actual products and I want to care for myself more. I hung out with my cousin today as well, we went to BAM and I got a deck of Oracle cards and a set of citrine crystal earrings which are beautiful. We headed back to my grandma’s house and sat outside with my aunt, grandma, uncle, and cousin. My aunt mentioned that I should buy some crystals to go along with the deck of cards and suggested a place I completely forgot existed, Pandora’s Box. I took my cousin up there with me to Norwich and purchased selenite, black tourmaline, and black onyx as well as a mini satchel, and a depression aid kit. 

Sunday: I decided to make a mini jar of prosperity oil as I watched a video of someone else making one. I decided to make it my own because everyone has different ingredients. It is supposed to attract money and success into your life. The ingredients I added were: mint (money, prosperity), basil (money, success), cinnamon (prosperity, good luck, energy), sesame oil (creativity, passion, money, success), patchouli essential oil (money, wealth, prosperity, material goods), sugar (fast acting agent). It was recommended to leave the oil to sit for two weeks so it can absorb all the herbs within the oil. I also went to Walmart and bought a nice lamp and a daylight bulb so that I can do my makeup in my room without the shitty lighting. When I tested it out, it was amazing and I was obsessed. It is amazing for photos as well as doing makeup. Later on this day, I organized my desk area to accommodate space for my makeup, shop items, school items, and machinery. It felt really good to do this.

Monday: Today marked the start of my weeklong Summer break before going back August 31st. I also slept the whole day because I was really tired. When I woke up, I went to Walmart and bought a nice wok for only $6. It’s 14 inches and I made vegetable fried rice with it, it is a dream to cook on. 

Tuesday: Today my HTV sheets arrived. After work I went to Walmart and got a nice clothing rack to hang my products on, it was only $9 and was easy to assemble. I also assembled it myself while my boyfriend went out and did whatever. I also bought 6 shirts, 3 med, and 3 large. I tested out the HTV by printing one of my popular designs onto it and applying it with the heat press. It was a hot peel unlike my other transfer sheets which were cold peel. There was a definite quality difference and it was easy to use. I was very scared to peel it because I messed up every time before. At first, there was some product coming off but I put it back down and put the heat press on it again. Eventually it came out nice and it is currently hanging on the rack waiting to be sold. I started my bullet journal today with the one I bought a few weeks ago when I noticed my current notebook getting filled up. It’s initial intention was to be exactly like my current notebook, but then I decided I wanted to make it a bullet journal and (actually use it this time) and make it look really pretty. As always, if I don’t “vibe” with a journal or a notebook, I tend to not use it or want to use it. It originally was very plain blue with a quote on it. I felt that I would not vibe with this so I added some personalization to it with stickers I had and even added one of my own. Finally putting a use to all the unused stickers I have (that are not mine). I did also make some sticker designs because I’ve been putting it off. I made 3 sticker designs. I thought they turned out really nice. However, when I printed them, they didn’t have a nice quality. It was solely due to the fact of how I was creating them (my art software that does not have transparency, which is essential for sticker making). I attempted to use scissors to get rid of the nasty border and used an exacto knife for the insides, and I accidentally cut myself on it, so great. 

Wednesday: Today was a pretty good day actually. At work, things went smoothly. I was the order taker, and normally it feels like the shift goes by forever but it wasn’t that bad this time. I was the one in charge so I made sure everything was done for the next shift and that everything went by smoothly and answered any phone calls and whatever. Later on this day, I was fed up with my designs not being the best quality that it can be. I decided to check out the Apple website because I love seeing their products, they’re so nice and smooth. I ended up applying for an Apple Card (which before I was denied 3 times), I actually got approved this time which is amazing! So, due to that, I was able to finance a brand new iPad Air 2019 and the first gen Apple Pencil. It is only $47 a month for both so it really is not bad at all. I am planning on canceling my gym membership, because I don’t even go, and honestly I feel I am content with my body right now and I don’t need a gym to get exercise. I still have yet to come into PF to cancel because you can’t do it over the phone. To make things better, before purchasing, I did do all the math to make sure I was financially stable especially for the upcoming weeks because I have bills due on the second week of September. I made a plan to save all my change to deposit into my account and to limit eating out to only once a week. (it shouldn’t be that hard). As of right now, my bills in tips that I make I will be depositing into my joint account to help pay for groceries because we are a little behind. I also consulted my friend Rheanna about the iPad because she has one for her shop. She has a different version but she says it is absolutely worth it and that I should definitely do it. So, in conclusion, it is a great investment for my business. Also, I would be using it for more than just that. I would be taking notes for school, grocery shopping lists, calculator as well (because with wearing face masks in the store, it makes Face ID unusable so it is a hassle to open the calculator, and the iPad I got has Touch ID instead) and much more. It is portable so I can draw anywhere literally. With my laptop PC and graphic tablet I can’t do that. I am actually very glad I got this and my pencil is supposed to arrive Thursday while it will take the iPad 2-3 weeks to arrive unfortunately. 

Thursday: Today, I was actually at work on time. Work went pretty smooth and I got everything done, there was no yelling at all or complaints. My coworker invited me to his upcoming event where people can be vendors and sell their shirts and other products. Showcase their shops kind of. He said he is planning on getting the permit to host the event in New London (which is the perfect place). Originally he said it would be a cash only event, but I suggested that a lot of people only carry card, like myself. I suggested that we accept Cashapp, PayPal and even get those tiny Square card reader things that plug into your phone. I also gave some more ideas. He said he would be having food catered to the event and I suggested that the vendors should also make homemade food to bring to cut costs on the event, as it will be free to get in. I suggested that when the advertisement begins, that I would help advertise as I have a big following on Facebook and I even said I would create a banner with a piece of every vendor’s art to show potential guests what they are in for. Eventually he asked me to help with the event, to which I said yes. I actually am very excited for this as it will be good business for everyone. 

#week update #overview #week overview #journal

[componentplanet]

The Best CPUs Ever Made

We’ve already covered the worst CPUs ever built, so it seemed time to flip around and talk about the best ones. The question, of course, is how do we define “best?”

In order to qualify for this article, a CPU needed to do more than just introduce significant new features or support a new instruction set. The Pentium Pro, for example, was a very important chip. It pioneered features still in use today and demonstrated that out-of-order execution and micro-op translation were viable techniques for high-end, next-generation processors. At the same time, however, the Pentium Pro had issues. It was slow when running 16-bit code and its FPU performance was only about half of comparable RISC cores at the time. The Pentium Pro was a very important CPU core, in other words — but it doesn’t meet our criteria when making a list of the best CPU cores ever invented.

To see which cores do measure up, check the slideshow below. We’ve taken a broad look at the industry over the past 40+ years, with mobile, server, and desktop CPUs all represented. Our selections were based on a variety of factors, including feature set, market impact, total strength of the product, and long-term performance.

Intel Celeron 300A

The Celeron 300A was one of the greatest enthusiast CPUs of all time. Overclockers quickly realized that the chip, which sold for $180, could regularly be overclocked to 450MHz. At that speed, it could match or outperform the Pentium II 450MHz, which sold for $655. Furthermore, when paired with the Abit BP6 dual-core motherboard, an enthusiast could run two CPU cores for less than the price of a single high-end Pentium II. Intel prevented this in later Celeron models and low bus speeds would handicap later chips, but the Celeron 300A was supremely well-positioned.

MOS 6502

The MOS 6502 was critical to the home computer revolution that began in the mid-1970s. It powered the original NES, Commodore VIC-20, Atari 400 and 800, and Atari 2600, as well as two minor machines you may have heard of — the Apple I and Apple II. The famous Commodore 64 was powered by its direct descendent, the 6510. Far cheaper than competing CPUs, the MOS 6502 revolutionized affordability in the early computing era.

AMD Duron 600

AMD’s K7 architecture put the company on the map as a competitor with Intel, but it was the Duron 600, in 2000, that truly put the screws to Intel. The CPU’s large L1 (128K) compensated for a small 64K L2. If a pencil was used to unlock the CPU multiplier and lock the chip to a 1.85v vCore, the chip could boot at FSB speeds as high as 190MHz if high-speed SDRAM was used. An overclocked Duron 600 could regularly hit 950MHz-1GHz, annihilated the Celeron, and could even challenge the Pentium III at a fraction of its price.

BAE RAD750

The BAE RAD750, first built in 2001, is a radiation-hardened version of the PowerPC 750 CPU core. It’s on this list for the way it has enabled our exploration of the cosmos. The Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter, Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter, the Kepler Space telescope, the Jupiter probe Juno, and the Mars probes Curiosity and InSight all use the RAD750. Plenty of chips make our lives easier on Earth, but only a handful of designs have touched the surface of other planets.

Intel Core 2 Quad Q6600

There were plenty of good Core 2 Duo CPUs, but Intel’s first mainstream quad-core was one of its longest-lived and most popular products. The Q6600 was in a relative sweet spot in terms of features and performance, with some professional VM capabilities Intel otherwise restricted and support for four cores at half the price of the Core 2 Extreme QX6700. Overclockers could push the chip from a base of 2.4GHz to well over 3GHz with the G0 stepping. Of all the C2D CPUs Intel launched, the Q6600 was the best overall part, hitting a near-perfect blend of price, performance, features, and overclocking capability.

Intel Core i7 2600K CPU top view

Intel Core i7-2600K

Intel has launched a lot of good Core CPUs, from original Nehalem to the Core i7-8700K. The 2600K, however, arrived at a uniquely good time for the company. AMD’s Bulldozer had missed. The PC market had only barely begun to slump. The 2600K had great overclocking headroom and strong single-thread performance — there’s a reason it’s been a challenging CPU for Intel to convince consumers to move on from.

AMD Opteron 275

The AMD Opteron 275 and the Athlon 64 X2 4800+ were basically the same chip (the Opteron clocked slightly lower, at 2200MHz). The server variant gets the nod in our best-CPUs list for one huge reason: It delivered absolutely crushing quad-core performance on motherboards that also had AGP slots. Up until the advent of dual-core CPUs, there were no ATX or even EATX motherboards with four sockets and AGP. It wasn’t physically possible. Quad-socket motherboards were very expensive, while dual-socket boards were much cheaper. The Opteron 275 made quad-core workstations with high-end graphics possible for the first time and offered dramatically better performance than Intel’s equivalent Xeons of the day.

LG E455 Optimus L5 II Dual – Mediatek MT6575A

ARM Cortex-A9

The Cortex-A9 was the second CPU in ARM’s high-end Cortex family, but arguably the first mobile CPU to show what modern smartphones were truly capable of. The combination of higher IPC, dual cores, and higher frequencies relative to the Cortex-A8 made the A9 a popular chip for a number of high-end devices, including Apple’s iPhone 4S. When Intel wanted to bring its Medfield phones to market, the Cortex-A9 was the competitor product they had to position against. ARM continues to launch well-regarded mobile CPUs, but the Cortex-A9 deserves credit for launching the dawn of a new smartphone era in style.

Intel Banias (Pentium M)

Intel’s Banias (aka Pentium M, aka Centrino) solved a critical problem for Intel in the early 2000s: The P4 was emphatically not a mobile CPU. To solve this issue, Intel created a new CPU architecture based primarily on the P6 (Pentium 3) microarchitecture, with some strategic enhancements from Netburst’s DNA. The result was a power-efficient, fast CPU that Intel wrapped into a new push around mobile networking and branded Centrino. Centrino-branded laptops sold extremely well, and Banias became the first in a series of CPUs that would evolve into the Core 2 Duo, Nehalem, and eventually, Coffee Lake. Banias wins a nod for its impact on the notebook market, the overall success of the Centrino program, and its own excellent performance.

Qualcomm Snapdragon 800

Qualcomm’s Snapdragon 800 was the dominant player in overall mobile performance and powered a huge number of high-end handsets virtually from launch. If we stretch a bit to include the Snapdragon 805, devices of this era were pushing the boundaries of LTE and smartphone performance farther, with larger screens, higher resolutions, and rapidly improving camera technology. Networking performance on the Snapdragon 800 was far better than previous-generation LTE devices.

Apple A9

Apple has led the pack on single-threaded ARM CPU performance for years, but picking a single SoC was tricky. I’ve settled on the A9 for several reasons. First, it was objectively a great performer — the iPad Pro in 2015 used a derivative of this SoC, the A9X, to challenge Intel and Core M. That didn’t stop Apple from also scaling it into its diminutive iPhone SE, which showed the design’s flexibility. The iPhone 6S didn’t sell as well as the iPhone 6, but it was considerably better made than that device and did not suffer from the so-called “Touch Disease” that afflicted the iPhone 6 Plus.

Honorable Mentions

Writing a “Best CPUs” list means that inevitably, a lot of really good CPUs are going to get left off the list. CPUs like the Intel 8086 or Motorola 68000 are often regular staples of articles like this, because of how they transformed the computing industry (launching the IBM PC in one case and launching the Macintosh as well as the Atari ST and Commodore Amiga in the other). We address many of Intel’s chips in more detail in our history of Intel products, parts one and two.

Honorable mentions for great chips that didn’t quite make our list would include the original Intel 4004, Pentium Pro, Pentium III, Intel’s Pentium 4 Northwood, AMD’s original K7, and CPUs like the Core i7-8700K. AMD’s recent Ryzen 3 parts are also potential contenders for this list, but I’m not comfortable naming such recent arrivals to the “Best ever,” list. Not quite yet. But the market impact of Ryzen can’t be denied — the third-generation Ryzen CPUs and Threadrippers have redefined performance in this market segment. Intel has slashed its prices across the Xeon and Cascade Lake families and dramatically improved its value proposition. All of these are factors that position Ryzen well in future comparisons, as far as inclusion on my personal “Best ever” list.

If I had to name a single “best ever” CPU, I’d go with the Opteron 275. Here’s my reasoning: Prior to the launch of dual-core CPUs, it wasn’t possible to have both a quad-socket motherboard and an AGP / PCIe slot. Quad-socket boards simply didn’t feature them. These boards were also quite expensive — thousands of dollars, IIRC, and while the initial Tyan boards for AMD were also pricey, at $500 – $800 (again IIRC), they were vastly less than a four-socket motherboard — and they shipped with features like PCIe. In a stroke, AMD had made far more computing horsepower available than ever before and done so while simultaneously adding graphics support. In terms of sheer impact on the market, and absolute reduction in cost, I have always felt the Opteron 275 deserved a special place in history.

Now Read: 

Is Moore’s Law Alive, Dead, or Pining for the Fjords? Even Experts Disagree

Intel Acknowledges It Was ‘Too Aggressive’ With Its 10nm Plans

AMD Will Provide a Free Temporary UEFI Upgrade Kit for Ryzen 3000 Motherboard Updates

from ExtremeTechExtremeTech https://www.extremetech.com/computing/295393-the-best-cpus-ever-made from Blogger http://componentplanet.blogspot.com/2020/04/the-best-cpus-ever-made.html

#The Best CPUs Ever Made

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2020 Vision & Planning System | iPad Planner | Apple Pencil | GoodNotes 5

My 2020 Vision & Planner System is described in this video in which I use only an iPad, Apple Pencil, and GoodNotes 5. This system FINALLY combines everything I’ve wanted in a planner but couldn’t put together with paper solution.

Hey guys. Welcome back and happy New Year. Welcome to 2020. I’m so excited about this year, and not just because it’s 2020 and it sounds cool; it’s also the beginning of a new decade, if you want to look at it that way. And it’s that time of year where if you’re like me, you’re looking at trying to figure out what are the systems, the tools, the planning, the vision that you have to put in place to tackle all of your biggest goals not only this year, but in the coming decade and beyond.

Today I’m going to go over my 2020 vision and planning system that I’ve put together that utilizes all of the best elements that I’ve ever wanted in a planning system, and to put it into one monster system that I’ll be able to use all the time and that’s super easy for me to follow.

Now, if there’s one thing that I’ve learned over the last six to seven years of experimenting with different planning systems, different notebooks and journals, different binder systems and try to get it to work seamlessly with the technology that I’m using, is that it’s very hard to do. So the two things I really knew about myself and the system, I wanted to put together, as number one, it had to have all of the elements I’ve ever wanted or the things that worked for me in the past; things like a vision board, vision statement, a one-year calendar planner that had certain views that I really liked looking at that were right for me, a place that I could journal; I’d been doing it over the last year and that’s something I really got some momentum up and wanted to take forward. Also, a place that I could track my daily habits and rituals; things like my morning ritual that I was implementing, things like an evening ritual which I really wanted to get better at, and also have some fun and creative elements; something that I started doing just recently, like drawing on my iPad.

And number two, it had to be simple enough that I could carry with me most any place that I was going to go and be able to easily access all of these different parts.

Now, this may seem like a tall order, but it’s 2020. We have access to more tools and technology than we ever have before. Now, I did figure out that for me, it was going to have to be something digital. I was kind of on the go all the time; sometimes I was a little scatterbrained about having these different things with me at all times, so having a digital solution was going to be ideal for me.

So the solution I came up with actually incorporated all of those elements into one device that I could easily track and keep up to date with on a daily basis and utilize my Apple pencil. I could type in it and I could do a number of other things. Personally, I think the best way to create a planning system that you’re going to use, that means you’re going to make that habit habitual. In the previous quote, it said, “Habit isn’t habit just because you say it is; habit is what you do habitually.” That means I was going to have to use something that I actually used every single day and that I was going to be able to make those things that I wanted to accomplish a part of my everyday life.

So everyone knows who Tony Robbins is. He has this great video that I first saw, I don’t know, about six, seven years ago. It might be older than that, I’m not sure. I’ll have a link in the description below. And that video is called New Year, New Life. Now, the first time he did it, he did it in January, and he wanted to talk about the word resolution and how you actually go about committing to getting your top goals and vision going without actually quitting after a month or two. So this is something he said you could implement at any time of year.

Number one: Have a compelling vision, then have two strong enough reasons to back it up. Be able to look at and review at every day because it would help program your RAS. Now, your RAS being your reticular activation system. There’s lots of videos about that, but it’s really how you can program your subconscious to focus on things because now that is the way you’re directing yourself. Number four: Raise your standards. Now, the way he explained it a little bit in that, is that it was a way of changing your identity. It was very hard to shift into the new patterns that you wanted to or the habits or the goals that you we’re setting for yourself if your standards, the way you looked at yourself, your identity, was still steeped in your old self or in negative self-talk or beliefs that weren’t going to allow you to move forward. And lastly, having the habits and rituals to back it up. Now, those are things like your daily rituals, your weekly, your monthly; things that you’re doing on a consistent basis that are geared towards the new goals that you have for yourself.

Now, while that sounds simple, there’s a lot of different elements that go into it. And I’ve watched this video year after year, at least the last five years. And little by little, I was trying to put in different components that were going to make it up. So those components, as I’ve mentioned before, ended up being, for me, things that I thought were important like vision board; vision statements; having a clear, solid why, which is kind of like the reasons to backing up the vision I was setting myself; a calendar planner that was going to work for me; morning and evening rituals; having a journal, which was something that I had done over the last year and I’ve really enjoyed; a way of being creative in drawing was something I wanted to add to my system.

Now, those are the components that are making it my vision and planning system. Now, if you want to hop around to different areas of the video, you can link in the description below to the timestamps of these different areas. And I also eventually am going to put up my own planning system, some of the own PDF that you can use, and I’ll be happy to share. The link will be in description when I have that up and running.

Now, vision board, I’ve always liked the idea of it, and I’ve always wanted to implement one ever since I saw the movie The Secret where John Assaraf talks in it about how he had set up a vision board years and years ago that he discovered because he was moving some boxes, and he had his old vision board on it, and it spilled out on the floor as he was moving things around in his new house; that on that vision board was the exact house that he was moving into. Not kind of like it, not similar to it. It was the house that he had cut out from a picture he had found before in a magazine about dream houses ,that he was moving into. The exact house that he had put on the vision board.

So a quick list for me of the things that I wanted on my vision board: I wanted to have a mix of goals that I wanted to achieve sometime in the future; I wanted to have some goals that were just out of my current timeframe, so I put about three years. Five years has always been hazy for me to think about envision planning, but if it works for you, use it. For me, it was about three years, which meant, oh, about a year and a half, that timeframe and double that, I was going to be able to make that happen. And then I wanted things that I was actually planning to do or had already planned on doing in the next 12 months, so I could actually grip that and say, “Hey, I’, going to knock that out, and I can accomplish that and I can get that done.”

And the areas in my life that I wanted reflected in my vision board were going to be things like health, wealth and finances. Now, there’s all kinds of different suggestions out there and videos about what elements or what parts and areas of your life to put into a vision board. If you can’t think of all of the areas at one time, just start with a few. I’ve always had the problem in the past where I think I have to have everything at one time. Sometimes you just need to start with the few and then you can build as you go. For me, it was going to be things like travel, things like my business, my entrepreneur life, the businesses and hustles I was getting going for the year. It was going to be things like relationships, which included family, my significant other, as well as people in my tribe. So let me know in the comments below if you’ve done a vision board before and what elements you think are important.

So the next part for me was vision statements. Now, why it’s slightly different, but also very powerful like a vision board is that it can be seen as a roadmap of where you want to go in areas of your life, and it clarifies it more. It makes you think and articulate about you, which we don’t really do, if you think about it, all too often in a written or in a verbal format. Written vision statements can also help you clarify about the direction you’re going and filter out some of the noise in your life. I don’t remember who it was exactly, but I heard a very successful CEO actually had all of the vision statements for his life in different areas, even business and different departments in the business, and he would pull out his binder, and if there was a particular business opportunity or venture he was considering, he would refer to his statements about what was important and the direction he was going. And if that thing didn’t fit into that area, then he didn’t do it.

Now, think about how powerful that would be for you in an age when we’re distracted all the time and we have all of these different things pulling us in different directions, that if you could actually go to kind of your owner manual, of your vision statements and look at the things that are important areas of your life, like your business, like your health, like your relationships or spirituality, any of these areas; you can have just a quick concise statement. Maybe it’s a paragraph, maybe like some people have, it’s a whole three or four paragraphs. Whatever it is, if it’s something that can guide you and you can articulate it verbally or in reading it, it’s going to help filter out distractions and noise and kind of keep you on pace.

Now, my why section; there’s so much that can be done with your why. There’s things that I’ve read in the past like Simon Sinek’s Start with Why. There’s a lot of resources online that say, “Go to your why. Go to your why.” Now, for me, it was just going to be as simple as a couple of exercises that I’ve done recently. So I was watching a YouTube video by Dean Graziosi. And in it, he was talking about how he went through a method with seven levels deep of why. Now, I don’t remember the coach he was talking about that ran him through that originally, but he was being interviewed by Lewis Howes. I’ll probably put that link in the description, as well. And the method he said was that you could start off with something as simple as, “I want to be successful in my business,” or, “I want to have a seven-figure business,” or you can talk about whatever major endeavor that you’re putting out in front of you, and you simply asked the question, “Why is that important?” And then when you answer that, you take that exact answer and you say, “Why is that important?”

Now, you’re supposed to do this seven times in a row. And you can do it several different times, because I’ve heard from different people that it takes a few times to get down there and get out of your mind and to actually answer. And Dean said that the first few are all intellectually-based, and by the time he got to the third or fourth answer, it started being a little bit more heart-based. Now, his final why in that particular thing that he was talking about, I think it was a program he was launching or he wanted to be successful in; it was to have more control in his life.

Now, I’ve gone through the same method and it was very interesting to me that I came up with the same answer. Slightly differently stated, but in my business, I wanted to get down to having more control in my life because I had grown up in a way similar to Dean: a little poor, my parents had problems with money, they fought about that a lot. And so my entrepreneur life has been kind of defined with that, but I never spoke that into being. A lot of the different answers you get in the levels of your why can be used as part of your why. You should write them all down, get them to where they really feel good and heartfelt to you, and you can use that in your why section.

Now, the calendar planning system. Now, for a lot of people, this is the meat and potatoes of your planner. For me, I’ve tried all kinds of different things. I’m really just bad at trying to actually keep to the commitments that I’ve made throughout the day because sometimes as an entrepreneur, I get shiny object syndrome or I’ll really focus down on two or three things and spend way more time than I allotted to it, and just blow through the rest of my schedule.

And the other thing about planner systems that I’ve used in the past is they’re kind of too defined for you. It seems like you find a planning system, you’re like, “Okay, I like this monthly view. I like this area for the weekly, but I really don’t like how they do this or that.” And in the past, when we had everything in a written format or in a written planner, it was really hard to be able to change any of that out. On top of that, if I wanted to change some priorities for the week, I had to erase it. And if I wrote in a pen, it was this whole thing.

So with that being said, I found a great solution for myself, and maybe it’ll help you too. I am implementing everything in my iPad. So there’s all kinds of videos now about how to use iPad planning systems or planners or using iPad for a number of different things. I found out about an app called Good Notes, which you can install on several different types of devices, not just Apple, I’m assuming, and I’ve looked into it a little bit. And also, I’ve used Evernote for years. So Evernote, I have notes that I’ve taken down for things that are important. I’ve segmented areas of Evernote for business, for my personal thoughts. I’ve journaled in Evernote before, too.

And Good Notes, What Good Notes does for a planner system, for a calendar system, is it allows you to import a PDF and be able to write on that. So one of my favorite planner systems that I found over the last couple of years was the Passion Planner. Now, the Passion Planner has great bound paper planners that you can order and have delivered to you, and a lot of people are in love with those. They also have free downloads on their website, and I’ll put a link in the description below, where you can actually go and download PDFs of a lot of different views and a lot of different elements of a planner, and you can import it into Good Notes and use it. The awesome thing about that is, then now I can use my iPad, my Apple pencil, and I can actually time block in there, I can color coordinate it, I can also, which is really cool to do, I can actually import photos that I want into there that are reminders or just some little fun thing to put in there to let me know about something that’s coming up. I can also draw in my planner and easily erase and move time blocks from one area to another if something changes or if a different priority came up or sometimes if I just get shiny object syndrome.

Later on I’ll go into a little bit more in depth about how Good Notes and the Passion Planner and that particular method is working for me. In the comments below. Let me know about a planner system that you’re using digitally that incorporate some of these elements.

Now, my habits and rituals. Now, this is something that I’ve really put some effort into over the last several years, of coming up with different ones that were going to work for me. Now, the thing with those is that I had to track them a little bit to stay on point. And I wanted them written down in a way that I could easily get up and refer to it in one location. Now, I’ll give you a little bit of a glimpse into my current one that I put together, which includes a couple of items that are very important to me right now, including a nice meditation, which I’m working on and actually something that I’m working on from Joe Dispenza for an identity shift.

Now, this also relates back to what I was talking about in Tony Robbins and the five elements of lasting change, where he says, “Raise your standards,” which is, in his words, a way to change your identity to that new person.

Now, I’m putting in here as 5:00 AM, is something I might test later on. I haven’t quite committed to that, because that seems like a very early time, but there’s a whole trend about getting up at 5:00 AM and all of the amazing things that can happen. I don’t know anybody who gets up at 5:00 AM that doesn’t just kick butt in what they’re trying to accomplish. Now I’m getting up about 6:30, 6:45. I’m going to try perhaps 5:00 AM, because I can actually fit more into my morning ritual.

After that, I have things that I do, like I have water and some brain supplements that I’m taking to give me a little bit more of a boost there, as well as some longevity things that I’m looking into that I’ll share at a different time, as well. And then there’s things like move. So that can be as simple as just doing a little bit of a walk or a stretch in the morning to get your body going and waking you up a little bit so that you’re ready, in an energetic state to look into your meditation and my identity shift that I’m doing.

Also after that, it’s important that I started journaling so I can capture some of the ideas that are coming out of my meditation or negative elements that are coming up, because as I’m doing this shift, it’s going to be a little bit difficult. And then after that, I do go ahead and plan my day. I have something that I’ve been following from Alex Charfen called the Waterfall Method. And this is a way of setting a one-year objective for your life, kind of like a one-year vision, and then going to only your first quarter in the first month in that, and then the first week in that and kind of daily planning from there.

In my evening rituals, if I’m going to be getting up at 5:00, I’m going to have to get to bed earlier, so I’m looking at trying to get in bed about 9:15, and then I can journal, do some gratitude, just write quickly about some day’s accomplishments or struggles, and then get to bed by 10:00 PM.

The second to the last thing is journaling. Now, this is something really cool, like a vision board that I’d never really implemented. And I don’t know if it’s because it’s not viewed as cool, or I don’t know if what I thought when I was younger, but now that I’ve been journaling for the last year, it’s something I really enjoy. I’m able to capture thoughts, I’m able to put down some things. It’s really important that I actually have a documented portion of some of my journey and some of the thoughts that I was going through in happy and sad times. I have everything dated and I’ve probably journaled, over the last year, about 85% of the time. More than 80% of the time, less than 90%, probably. And I love that I can go back and look at what thoughts are going on, or great ideas that are bubbling up for me after I do my morning rituals that I can just write something down, I can go back and take a look at it.

And being able to draw in my journal. Now the last slide I’ll talk about drawing and how much that’s helped, but I’m able to copy and paste into my journal cool things from the internet that I want to implement. And I can also keep track by drawing about certain ideas or activities or just trying to add a little bit of creative element to my journal, as well.

So lastly, finally being able to talk about a really fun thing that I’ve incorporated in this just last few months of 2019 going into 2020, is the ability to draw. Now, I was at breakfast with a close friend of mine and we were talking about business ideas and all the things that we want to get done over the next couple of years. And he pulls out this huge iPad and an Apple pencil, and he starts taking notes and I’m taking notes on my computer so it’s not a big thing. But then I noticed that he’s like scribbling every once in a while and kind of intently doing it, but also listening to me. So I said, “Hey man, what are you doing?” And he shows me, and it’s a picture of a rocket or something. And I’m like, “What’s going on here?” You know, “I thought we were having this meeting. We’re talking about it, and now you’re just drawing picture?” He says, “No, I’ve actually read a book by Dan Roam called Draw to Win.” But there’s lots of articles and studies done on the benefits of drawing, like developing neural systems, it improves cognitive function and memory, increases creativity, problem solving and also gives you just an a healthy emotional balance.

So now I’m implementing drawing into my journal, my note-taking, my calendar planning and I’m already noticing that I’m enjoying it a lot. I’ll actually take some time and I’ll figure out how to draw a rocket or a bridge or any number of things just to test it. And I’m trying different colors now, too because it’s not something that I’ve done in the past, but I’m loving it and I highly recommend you add it to your system, as well.

If you like the video, please hit the thumbs up and subscribe below. Also, hit the notifications so that you can get informed about some of my upcoming videos that go more into depth into my vision and planning system and also to hear about some of my awesome videos that I have coming up that I’m going to be doing to help you get a breakthrough in your business, in the marketing that you’re doing or your mindset that are going to help you level up. Appreciate you watching. Take care, and we’ll see you next time.

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[ramialkarmi]

The new iPad and Apple Pencil helped me finally understand the utility of a tablet

I got very little use out of my first iPad back in 2011. Even amid all of the excitement of having a brand-new Apple device, I felt no real need for my second-generation iPad, between my iPhone and my MacBook.

I know I'm not alone. I've heard a lot of people agree that it's tough to justify spending hundreds of dollars on a third screen size — and yet, Apple keeps on making tablets. Why?

"Both [The Mac and iPad] are incredible," Apple CEO Tim Cook recently told the Sydney Morning Herald's Peter Wells when he negated rumors that the Mac and iPad might eventually merge. "One of the reasons that both of them are incredible is because we pushed them to do what they do well."

So, I decided to take the new reasonably sized and priced iPad for a spin, along with the not-so-reasonably priced Apple Pencil, to figure out what it was that I hadn't considered. I have to admit that I was pleasantly surprised. 

Here were my takeaways after owning an iPad for the first time in seven years:

The iPad is the perfect weight and size for commuting, at least for me.

I never had a real complaint about the MacBook's portability before, but there was a time when I was traveling frequently and felt the need to switch to the lighter MacBook Air; I eventually had to go back to the MacBook Pro when I needed more storage. 

The iPad solved the weight-versus-storage issue for me by letting me treat my MacBook Pro like I used to treat my desktop, but with more flexibility.

The iPad moved around my apartment and went with me to coffee shops when I had to get work done, but it stayed at home any time I had a commute and could get away with accessing files or apps from a self-standing screen that's larger than my iPhone. 

Since I have a separate work computer at the BI office, I could opt for the much more portable iPad over my MacBook Pro on a day-to-day basis. In contrast, Tim Cook said a few years ago that he used his iPad around the house and took his laptop to work — the point is, you have options. 

The iPad makes for a much better mobile experience than the iPhone with regard to multitasking.

If you swipe up, you see the dock, which can support 13 apps plus an additional three that automatically populate as your most recently used. Swipe up even further and you get the Control Center and can see all of the apps you have open. 

On an iPhone, shuffling through your open apps when five or six of them are running at a time is frustrating, but with iOS 11, Apple makes use of the iPad's real estate and lays out all of the app cards without overlap, making for a much more pleasant experience when you're multitasking. 

Multitasking didn't always work, though.

Multitasking got slightly unpleasant when I started testing out the different ways in which you can use two apps at once. 

With Split Screen, you can divide the screen into two sections, with the apps taking the screen 50-50, 75-25, or 25-75. It was great for planning a trip, and I used it to look up sights and book tickets while I jotted things down in the Notes app. I was upset that it didn't work with Google Maps or the Gmail app, though (this is not a Google thing because it worked with Google Photos just fine).

For those apps, I resorted to Slide Over, which creates a window that's about one-third the size of the screen and sits on top. You can choose where you want to position it, and slide it in and out of view as it's needed. I decided this would be perfect for a music player, but Spotify didn't allow it. 

Still, I was really happy with picture-in-picture support since I could watch videos or FaceTime while I did other things.

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

#Tech Insider #Arab #Entrepreneurship #sillicon alley insider