#also i feel like im going backwards.... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

watercubebee · 22 days

Text

Pain and suffering.....

#AUUUUUUUUUUUUGHHHH THATTHE REASON WHY I NEVER DRAW THE WOMEN I LOVE ITS BECAUSE I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO CAPTURE THEMA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #*cries in a corner*#also i gotta practice light again....#its been difficult #.....#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY #AIUSIUADGADIIGAIGDIUAUDGCAIUDGAIGUDIUAGUIUGAIFGUAD #*dies*#Jenny Green #dead boy detectives #dead boy detectives spoiler #also i feel like im going backwards....#dont i.....feels so....#anywayisises akjbdvjkabdvjlbajlrgblavbld

283 notes · View notes

hella1975 · 9 months

Text

all hate to tiktok for taking 'having a space to more openly and actively talk about different cultures' to mean 'cultures are NOT to be shared and we must be vigilantly defensive of our cultures for fear of appropriation, a word that can be applied to any multicultural interaction'. like of course cultural appropriation is a very real problem but ive seen with the access to global multicultural conversation that tiktok provides it's made people TERRIFIED to even interact with cultures other than their own for fear of 'doing it wrong'. like at some point you have to acknowledge that in the real world of the great outdoors, the majority of people are eager to SHARE their cultures. yes there are ignorant questions and biases but also... how do you think those things get unlearnt? i dont understand how deciding that multiculturalism is an elephant in the room instead of a normal thing that should just be talked about and lived with is supposed to benefit anyone? and kids on tiktok are CONVINCED that it's a time bomb of a conversation to have and therefore must be avoided at all costs but like. people generally LOVE their home and their culture and are PROUD of it and want to share it. how have we made it so that showing genuine interest and a desire to understand something so integral to a person's identity is now feared and borderline demonised?

#thinking about this a lot lately. thinking about how fun it was comparing cultural differences in america #thinking of how when i was homesick one thing i found a great comfort in was talking about my home #and how it differed and i really loved and appreciated it when people would ask me about england #in a way that they genuinely just wanted to learn about it and not to take the piss #thinking about how the kitchen at work has chefs from all over europe. we have an irish chef and a spanish chef and an italian chef #and one of the kps is from eastern europe (i havent actually been able to find out where yet) etc and the way they banter with each other #like usually chefs are Problematic bc their humour is VERY abrasive and usually offensive #but this is one instance where it's actually to their benefit bc they're so unafraid to ADDRESS THE FACT THEY HAVE DIFFERENT CULTURES #i feel like the tiktok gen are so petrified of even acknowledging other cultures let alone discussing them #that it's actually sending the conversation backwards. like how does hoarding your culture and pretending it's not there benefit anyone #LET ALONE YOU AND THE CULTURE IN QUESTION. idk it just baffles me a bit that something that started as people on tiktok #genuinely spreading information and talking about the BAD side of this where people DO culturally appropriate or invade spaces that arent #theirs has now become 'for fear of speaking bad about it we will not speak about it at all'. and they'll crucify you if you do. like what #even at uni my best mate is indian and she's too scared to join the sikh society on her own so i regularly go to the events with her #and im typically one of the handful (or the only) white non-sikh there and i get SO welcomed each time #like there's such a genuine excitement to share the culture with someone who is effectively a blank slate #and like yeah ill ask 'dumb' questions or i'll have different experiences (tried a samosa for the first time at one of these events #and the moment that info got out i had like five STRANGERS trying to give me different samosas to try and it was genuinely such #a laugh bc yes they were TEASING me bc 'how have you never had one' but they were also really eager to share MORE as a result)#ugh idk what im saying. i just think it's a shame to watch this happen in real time on the internet #when if people would just go outside and actually TALK to people from other cultures they'd realise 9 times out of 10 the interactions #are actually really really nice for BOTH parties. and actually refusing to talk about this stuff is long-term pretty fucking detrimental #and it also goes the other way!!! like imagine if i - citizen of colonisation motherland herself - didn't interact with other cultures #and didnt ask questions or hear their opinions on whatever shared history we have from THEIR POINT OF VIEW #imagine the kind of shit id be internalising bc i only hung out with other white british people. it wouldnt matter if i was doing it #to be woke or 'respect their culture'. it would still be fucking ignorant. like half my interactions with other cultures #see me as the butt of the joke bc of this like aforementioned irish chef at work VOCALLY slates the english all the time #but it's done in an environment where we're FRIENDS and it's poking fun at each other while still addressing a very serious history. like??#idk if any of this is worded in a way that makes sense but yeah. i have thoughts #cant believe i got inspired to make an actually serious post bc of the CHEFS AT WORK. embarrassing. no one let them see this

78 notes · View notes

redysetdare · 9 months

Text

I do not see what's so difficult about understanding that you can care about people without loving them??? people do it all the time and yet when you point that out they deny it and act like it's such a foreign concept.

like you guys don't actually love strangers - you can care about them and feel bad when they are hurt but you cannot tell me you "love" them. You can still care when someone you hate gets hurt - that doesn't mean you love them. Care =/= love it's not that difficult to understand.

#text #love #loveless #loveless aro #maybe lovelesss idk #i feel like that maybe fits #also if someone says 'what about love thy neighbor' im going to kill them because we all know that christian bs doesnt actually mean love #like sorry but christians idea of love is kinda bs lmao #i swear tho ppl are making it harder than it needs to be #and also i think they just hate the idea of ppl not loving that they bend over backwards and warp normal experiences #to fit their narrative of 'everyone loves and everything is love' bs

51 notes · View notes

sophiethewitch1 · 1 month

Text

kinda wanna write a fic where the dog is literally the deus ex machina

#sophie speaks #dog backwards is god yknow it makes sense #me and my undertale bullshit back on it again #i have 3 fic ideas for it. one is a meta commentary one is just about a reader with a chronic illness and one is my love for desperate read #-rs returning in full blown massive fashion. and also identity issues but all 3 of these fics have that last one just has that. a lot lot #all include my weird DID metaphors and multiverse shenanigans #because honestly all sans/sans shippers do not understand the weirdness of loving an alternate version of urself #they dont lean into it #i mean im not gonna write sans/sans I'm an x reader till death because i love self love. also sans could not love himself look at that guy #but undertale itself has so many cool themes u can build off of that i just. i wanna grab and squeeze em out like juice #and i mean its not like i can do www at the moment I've written like... 9k this month it ain't going good #might as well just enjoy the depression spiral. i know that doesn't sound very possible but yknow. we rock w it #im just in pain all the time... ill go back to the docs soon and maybe just start taking straight up opiods #but until then i can only do things if i feel there is absolutely 0 pressure on me to do them #once again thanks school system i love these learned behaviors you traumatised into me they're really useful #what was i saying? did i mention im a little scatterbrained atm

9 notes · View notes

obsidiannebula · 5 months

Text

Husband apparently found some posts of people complaining about trying to play Divinity: Original Sin 2 after enjoying BG3. And to that I say, just be glad you weren't playing with my husband, whose favorite battle strategies were "Laser Ray everything and I mean EVERYTHING in his path" and "use Internal Combustion on allies to turn them into walking time bombs if that maximizes the number of enemies hit, and also out of combat just for fun"

#dos2 #no but im not surprised some people who loved bg3 are bouncing off of it cause thats just how it goes #when a franchise or developer gets mainstream acclaim after already making a lot of games #a lot of people wont even bother to look at previous games #some will #and some will come to love them just as much as old fans #and others will bounce off it because its less polished or just plays a little different #to me bg3 felt a TON like dos2 except with d&d rules with which i was already quite familiar #to people going backward to dos2 it may not feel as similar #dos2 is also much more linear #also playing a custom character is even less interesting than making a tav is #in both games the origin characters are just FAR more interesting ways to experience the plot than customs #but idk it is actually kinda fun to make a custom tav. in dos2 i do not recommend doing anything but an origin run #ugh i cant stop rambling dos2 is so good you should really try it #if nothing else you need to discover the far cooler version of elves #uh. cw for cannibalism with them though

17 notes · View notes

thecommunityoftrustworthysinks · 8 months

Text

mentioned this in my last post under the cut but you have no idea how much it irked me as a physicist to read about how gege consulted a FUCKING ENGINEER about limitless. an engineer. an ENGINGEERRRRRR. i just. not even a mathematician? engineers don't work with theoretical physics. engineers hardly even work with nonreal math! you're out here designing a guy whose powers involve imaginary mass and divergent series and you DON'T even go to like the two fields that actually work with those things on a semi regular basis...an engineer.......what's he telling you....how to build a bridge?????????????

#jujutsu kaisen #limitless #gojo satoru #gege akutami #sorry everyone i feel strongly about this i was screaming and scrabbling at the screen to get involved in that conversation #x #EVERY day im doing some shit with infinite sums.......i understand a good portion of the tachyon wikipedia page....................please..#there are physicists even more fit than me for this too because i don't really do particle physics #which limitless isn't necessarily particle physics but like.#i cannot stress this enough 'imaginary apple/mass' that draws things in (red) is LITERALLY what a tachyon is #which has some really interesting implications for limitless re:time #because tachyons by virtue of their imaginary mass technically go faster than light and travel backwards in time #(they're hypothetical particles but jjk is also a work of fiction so)#and divergence of an infinite series into reality (blue) is sick as hell dude and engineers do learn the math to work with these #but it's still hypothetical theoretical math to say what that would actually be in real life #and you would be better off asking a mathematician or a physicist because we actually do that shit #sorry for the rant DHKJFGHJDF limitless was made for me im so obsessed with it #like come on man........when physicists encounter division by zero we're more likely to treat it as infinity than discard it.#trust me we know the forbidden math.

24 notes · View notes

sevenrs · 10 months

Text

sometimes ive felt left out in fandoms for not wanting to ship anyone in canon but i think a lot of the rain world ships are more silly people having fun then dominant atmosphere

you keep going shippers. i admire your passion and commend your self expression

#broadcast.txt #i personally prefer ocs because you can make whatever dynamic you want without potentially bending canon backwards #ocposting on tumblr can be hard though #sometimes feels like only one person cares #it is not true but. also going through an art rough patch so im a bit frustrated

22 notes · View notes

steelycunt · 1 year

Note

ridi im sorry i need to rant and i think youll get it 😭 like not to be a bitch but this fandom kinda going off the rails and annoying the shit out of me https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRbYASpf/ everybody in the comments unironically loving it,,, i mean wtvr ship who you want but its kinda getting delusional like ppl are just operating on thin air and pretty fancasts atp and i do Not understand or emotionally connect with any of it. at least w wolfstar theres so much material and foundation to explore but what is all the rest of this?? just hot celebrity fancasts and crack. to be fair part of me respects taking a terfs canon material and making everybody gay but the way it seems to be so oversaturating fics and the fandom that characters dont even feel like their original selves .. atp its all just surface level OCs

hello! yes! i'll be honest talking about things like this always make me a little nervous, and i feel obligated to preface anything i say with a disclaimer that none of it really matters, nothing i say matters, and you should do what you like, because--who cares. i am not an authority on--anything, frankly. my opinion holds no more weight than the next guy's, and all i'm doing here is giving it, so. essentially what im saying is--people are perfectly entitled to disagree with me, but people are not entitled to be mean to me about it xx

having said that. it is my personal opinion that s x barty is one of the worst fucking things i have ever heard lol. who even is barty who is that guy. why would s be interested in him at all. i do not understand it it does not make sense to me. from where are we sourcing the character traits and personality that we are giving barty that would ever endear sirius to him, because it objectively cannot be canon.

overall i do not get the new interest in barty + evan + pandora (+ regulus, but we won't go there)...at all, other than guessing that people were bored with the marauders and wanted a new version of them (and new celebrities to fancast) while simultaneously changing next to nothing about them other than superimposing them onto the first slytherin side characters they could rustle up. i expect ive become a bit of a broken record in regards to my dislike of the popular meow-meow-ification + complete absolution of regulus as a character in order to make him a loveable oc (just as i think erasing all the negative traits that r/s have in order to make them more likeable is just as boring), and all of that applies to those other guys as well (with the slight difference that they are, somehow, even less interesting and significant than regulus in canon), so i won't get into that too much. but i think what you say about having no emotional connection to any of it is exactly right lol--it is a sort of shift? i guess? in the fandom that is simply of no interest to me. they are characters that i just have no emotional investment in and admittedly struggle a little to understand why other people do. i am emotionally invested in, like, five characters overall (and even out of those--there's only two i'm really here for innit xx) and i personally cannot extend that investment to a creepy little side character who is mentioned maybe twice in the entire series.

and that is okay! i do not need to understand it. i don't want to say it annoys me because honestly--i don't go there, its nothing to do with me. if i dont like it i just wont interact with it, and the fact that it doesn't interest me has no bearing on what other people are into or want to do, and i couldn't give less of a shit what people do with the canon material, which is largely garbage anyway. take the bits you want from it, play around with those and ignore the rest. in that respect we are all doing exactly the same thing. but yeah i think s x barty is genuinely awful lol. hate it. very terrible. he's already got a loser werewolf boyfriend and he loves him so so much. leave him alone.

#i know most people are reasonable and thus it is perhaps overly cautious of me to insist on shrouding my unpopular #opinions in like. layer upon layer of placatory disclaimers but. well im a rather anxious guy i can't help it xx but im going to use these #tags to have a bit more of a consequence-less hater hour so. if you like regulus or barty or any of that lot i suggest you look away now #because i am about to express opinions about them that you probably wouldnt agree with + wouldnt enjoy reading!!#like full warning what im about to do is NOT any sort of analysis or defence of my opinion i will just be hating on them. is that clear.#okay. having said that. hater hour. barty and evan and honestly regulus were all cunts? like they were terrible people why do we care #about them now. regulus interests me solely as a piece of context for sirius' character. i could not give less of a shit about him as a #person in his own right. which leads me to my next hater moment: why oh why oh WHY on earth would canon james potter be interested #in canon regulus black. it makes sense in like a muggle au where they are virtually completely different characters but canon?#why would he be attracted to him. there is nothing. there is no chemistry i am ASLEEP and so is james. he would not give that #guy a second look. like it just baffles me it truly does. i feel like you have to bend over backwards to create a situation in which #james potter would ever show an interest in regulus. and i know jegulus is a fucking force to be reckoned with nowadays but god i just #do not like that ship. also i think the fact that barty and pandora and evan are essentially just oc characters who have been coloured #in by general fanon consensus shows in that what they have become is just. not interesting or complex or well fleshed out lol. like #idk i feel like they are just. very shallow. deliberately. so they are easy to like and easy to ship because that is what theyre there for.#god it feels so good to say all this. i will never be a hater again (<- lying) but i needed to be able to just. say this just once xx #also if you needed any more indication what barty and evan and regulus are here to do you just have to look at their #super-hot super-conventionally attractive celebrity model fancasts. like it all adds up its like but what if these death eaters were #not actually evil :-( what if they were really sweet and also? so so hot. like they were all so hot and actually really good #and none of them meant to be evil they didnt want to be :-( they were just hot good guys all in love with each other and the evil stuff #they did wasnt their fault :-( like that has to be. the most boring thing you couldve possibly done with these blank slates. surely.#anyway. im done now but i enjoyed hater hour immensely this was so fucking good for my soul xx thanks and goodnight xx #anon #telegram #scream hang on sorry. just looked at the comments of that tiktok where people are saying they were prison besties. girl. girl.#girl they were in prison for very different reasons baby. baby you know that right. baby look at me. look at me

55 notes · View notes

jesytr · 4 months

Note

you're a much better liar than i expected you to be .

she observed his response with as much thought as she would count her own willingness to want to share what little she could. thinking it better to lie about what has really happened to get her where she was that night. pulling away from the child sized girl that hid behind her. matching blonde hair. green eyes popping up to look at arthur between tears that streamed down her face. it was hard enough to bring herself to mention why her daughter was there with her only that she bounced the thought between where to bring her. her eyes staring at the front door step that she brought Lucille Quinzel to. keeping up habitual dilemmas of where else she could bring them too. having never properly introduced the two.

" she's - " harley started in. her words cutting off at the sounds of her youngest shaking her hands back and forth with a small sheepish start, " I wouldn't lie about this , but - "

" mommy ! " Lucille started after sometime. pulling up on her parent's sleeve and staring with bulbous eyes that looked a little less sad, but still shaken up. peeling off her hands to stuff then into her pockets and empty a small wrapped chocolate one that she passed over to her daughter.

" we aint got nothin' , but trouble . . . " blue hues went back to looking over at @jokethur . her voice hushed in the night. people that preferred the dark walked along the streets even as it was half past midnight. Gotham had a way of pulling out all kinds of inhabitants out at all hours , " falcone is after us. my place ain't safe tonight. " not sure where else to turn to when all she had was hitman on her back , but with a kid in tow it made living out much more harder. her apartment has already been tracked.

" more chocolate ! " Lucille persisted. wiping her face with her long pink sleeves , scooting a little closer to peer more at arthur , though very shyly.

". sure thing , lucy. " mother reaching to pry through a rather large bag. riffling through it's containments. lipstick, candies, and a revolver. smiling as she found her candy stash. handing the sweets over to her , ". she's my daughter. I couldn't just let them find us , ya know ? " lucy gasped as she examined the bag of treasured chocolates.

#jokethur #♦️//: ooc. ( im bent out of shape backwards and forewards. )#so this is the same lucy as my account for her over at ( damagedrot )#just when she was much younger #figured that way i can play around with her timeline a bit #also since i cant really imagine her father figure being the joker for context hes a ~mystery~ and goes by the name Jack #ill give more details on thst if arthur asks but Jack's alot like the comic version of the joker without actually BEING the joker #or maybe hes not even part of the picture anymore #it'll have to write itself out? haha!#jack = jack napier ( who the comic joker is referred to i think ? )#also i picture them here showing up at Arthur's front doorstep #i dont know how old arthur/nix's kids would be here since lucy is just a kid especially since she visits arthur later as a teenager but go -#with what feels right #right??

5 notes · View notes

aro-aizawa · 10 months

Text

being a fan of miraculous ladybug is painful when you have overwhelming secondhand embarrassment

#shut up danni's talking #MARINETTE I ADORE YOU SWEETHEART BUT I AM IN PHYSICAL PAIN #there are a few episodes i genuinely can't bear to watch or i skip parts in specifically bc of this #like backwarder is one of them #and im getting the feeling that psycomedian is also one of them #im excited to watch an episode i still haven't actually watched bc new content!!!!#but at the same time i would rather walk over hot coals than experience secondhand embarrassment #i have hopes that season 5 will have less episodes like this but i still have been staying away from as many spoilers as i can #so i have like no idea what the heck is going on in season 5 other than gabe's no longer hawkmoth i think #and smth to do w felix? and maybe sentimonster adrien??? who knows #this episode may be 21 minutes long but its gonna take me an hour to get through i swear

8 notes · View notes

mellomadness · 2 months

Text

sometimes I wonder if I should take a gender studies class just so I can bitch every day about how an imaginary boyfriend is often seen as a requirement for a woman to feel safe enough to have fun at a club, or the idea that an imaginary person with a fake “claim” over me has more influence over predatory men than my own voice saying “No, I’m not interested, get lost”

#venting #hnnnnng the double standard is really really making my teeth hurt recently #(in that I’m grinding my jaw at the mere thought of this particular breed of injustice)#I honestly miss going out with my friends. I miss going to bars and clubs and enjoying the night #but I wanna go with my friends and leave my boyfriend at home for once #he gets to go out and enjoy himself all the time with his friends and they never even have to deal with unwanted flirtation #meanwhile I go out in a tshirt and jeans and get fucking catcalled or flirted with just fucking getting groceries #and it’s not a narrative on beauty or anything. it’s about men’s perception of women #specifically predatory men and men who don’t realize they’re BEING predatory #perhaps it’s because I’ve been going to this fucking gamer school for far too long #and I’ve interacted with so many socially inept/incel men from there #who don’t know what no means or dont take women seriously when they do say no #or they literally cannot read between the lines of a woman politely declining their advances #‘but she was being so nice to me’ yeah bc if she wasn’t you’d either call her a bitch or try to force her anyway #anyway. I’m angry #im tired of living in fear of morons #I’m tired of not being able to go out on a Tuesday night and just walk the town with my friends #specifically my femme friends #we should be at the club!! instead we’re trying to make sure the group is like a school of fish so we’re less of a target #and like. I could talk about this on twt or reddit but. cmon. let’s be real here #MelloMoans #really does feel like we’re going backwards when it comes to gender equality and feminism #especially with the influx of the whole sigma male/high value male bullshit #I understand how it came to be I really do but that plus the whole pick me girl thing is just another toxic view of gender identity #and all it has resulted in on both sides is a wider degree of separation between the genders #therefore allowing both extremes to dehumanize every one that doesn’t identify as sigma male or not like other girls YET AGAIN #(and therefore also opens up the door for dehumanizing lgbtq+ folks but. let’s be real. that hasn’t really gone away yet :/

3 notes · View notes

violetkatgrove · 3 months

Text

tempted to make a ebeg post but also theres so many other things going on that i wanna just stick to getting money via commissions but also i can b arely draw right now so. u can see the struggle

#vent #fighting tooth and nail like ohhhh you live with your parents youre fine you dont need to ask for money #when i am one sudden loss of money away from the negatives. and cant always ask them for thigns.#and theyre also on a new diet so theres less things in the house and i feel like im going backwards in terms of how much i eat which sucks #sorry for complaining on main. feel bad complaining to friends. might delete later #uh. my pypl dot me is just violetkat if anyone does want to offer an extra 3 bucks or smth #idk. ill figure myself out after i eat something

3 notes · View notes

frankenstheythem · 4 months

Text

jthm has done the same shit to me n my attachment/persecutory delusions and general unhinged behavior *now* as the httyd books did when i was 11........ whuh,,,,, time is a triangle???

#things are connecting im sure. im not seeing numbers everywhere for nothing plus im going thru like? some ancestors related shit #meeting ppl that are now what i once was.... finally feeling like living my life but not as a person?? more like as a tool #A MACHINE IF YOU WILL #my days are counted backwards my birth was my death and im slowly descending back into what the actual start shouldve been #(this is also how i find out i kin bella baxter)#ok back to eep #.dizzy.exe #.intermission: [X]

2 notes · View notes

c3p-mo · 4 months

Text

._.

#idk im not feeling well physically and i know a lot of it is anxiety but also idk #having bad thoughts again and im trying to combat them but also i did fuck up i fucked up a lot and hurt ppl i care about and idk guilt mayb #feeling very far form ppl i love but idk what yo fo yo get back and im scared i did too much damage to get back #idk idk nervous babble i feel like im going backwards again im think im falling back into bad depression again esp with medical things now #but feeling really alone and scared and anxious ><

2 notes · View notes

tipytap · 5 months

Text

“but youre young! you shouldnt be in pain!” uh yeah thats kinda why its an issue bestie 😘💖