#about the one time I made a comment on capitalism sucking

[mrvlbimbo]

AHHH EDDIE MUNSON LITERALLY OWNS ME HOLY FUCK

this is a request btw but if you dont wanna this could easily just be us geeking abt this beautiful man

okok sO y/ns like this good girl teachers pet-- pleated skirts and mary janes and all-- with straight a's and she's sent to tutor eddie bc man is failing with a capital F so they're studying in her pink room with a bunch of awesome stuffies (in my head a lot of them are dragons and gargoyles and eddie's nerdy lil heart fricken explodes but this is just me being stupid in love) and he has full intention to do absolutely zERO work

(corruption kink and dom!eddie if you couldn't tell by now jdjjd)

and the whole time he's just teasing her (cough degrading her cough) and flirting with her (cO U G H praising her ahem) and- oops now they're fucking *acts shocked*

fin

(also i'm 19 minors pls away away *sprays you with water*)

oh gosh. This is filth, genuinely. I don't know how I wrote this with a straight face. I need to go to confession or smthn.

content: innocence kink, unprotected sex, creampie, improper use of a study date, I literally never know what to put in this part, not proofread bc I'm lazy

Eddie paced around the delightfully pink room, taking note of how the frilly edge of the bedspread matched the girl spread out on top of it to a tee.

In his dreams this is exactly how her room looked, sans the adorable stuffed animals that even he couldn’t have conjured up in his imagination. He plucked one off the bed, inspecting it carefully as if it were some precious item. "Your room is uh...cute,” he commented.

“Oh jeez. I mean to put those away before you got here.” She shook her head and her bottom lip between her teeth, coaxing the stuffed animal out of his hand and carefully setting it back on the bed.

“I think they’re cute. Didn’t take you for a bat girl though,” he teased, gesturing to her large collection of unorthodox stuffed animals. It was made up of mostly bats, with a few dragons and other miscellaneous fantasy creatures.

“Oh yeah. I wanted to rip the head off of one of them, ya know as a reference to Ozzy Osborne, but my mom said it was too vulgar.”

"You're cute too,” he said confidently. She had noticed the way she looked at him in class and when their teacher paired them together to help get his grade up, he knew it was his chance to make a move.

"Hm?” She hummed.

“You’re cute too. Like the bats.” His voice pitched slightly, still unsure of his actions. She sat on the edge of her bed, blinking up at him with wide sparkling eyes.

She shook her head, looking away and hiding the shy smile on her face. “Oh. I don’t think-“

“Aw. Why are you getting shy on me now?” he teased, cupping her face. His thumb brushed over her lip, pushing its way into her mouth when her lips gaped slightly.

“Mmmm,” she whined around his finger, looking up at him though her fluttering lashes with an innocent and confused gaze.

“Lookit you. All innocent and yet you’re sucking my finger like a-"

She tongued his finger out of her mouth, pushing it away harshly and whining the residual drool off her face. “Eddie. We need to study," she warned.

“Alright, baby. Whatever you want. How about you sit on my lap so we can focus on each other better?” He sat in her bed, back against her headboard. He waited comfortably for her answer.

“O-ok.” She hesitantly straddled his lap, knees shaking to hold her a respectable distance above him.

He gripped her waist, tugging her hips down to meet his so she was resting more comfortably on his lap. “So. Tell me about the Pythagorean theorum.”

“Basically…” She droned on about the sides of a triangle and how they all related to each other. Her voice stuttered slightly when his hands fell from her waist down to her thighs, pushing up her skirt and digging his fingers into the flesh of her legs.

“Mhm, keep going. Did I say you could stop?” he asked, his voice innocent enough but he was clearly mocking her.

“Why is your lap so hard?” She questioned, hips stuttering and involuntarily rubbing against him.

“Because someone is soaking right though their panties onto my cock,” he chastised, running two fingers over the seam of her and feeling the wetness seep through.

“I didn’t mean-“ she started to apologize but she was quickly interrupted.

"If you're gonna get them all wet, you don't really need them do you?" he asked, hooking his fingers into the band and tugging it back. The fabric snapped back against her skin, causing a whimper to leave her lips.

"Uh, no. I guess not," she replied slowly. Before she could finish he was already prying the underwear off her body, gently sliding them down her legs.

She whined when she pressed her uncovered cunt back to the denim of his jeans. His arms wrapped around her waist, pressing her tightly to him but stilling any motion she could have made with her hips.

“Aw, none of that. Do you want me to help?” He asked, slipping one hand down to grip her ass and squeeze.

“You’re gonna make me feel better?” she whimpered, a pleading look in her eyes.

He could already feel her wetness dripping onto his lap, easily sliding two fingers into her. “Yeah. I’m gonna make you feel so good," he cooed, curling them against her walls. A smooth metal ring bumped against her clit, sending a shiver though her body.

He teased his fingers in and out of her, revealing in the way her body shook violently against him. "Pleeeease," she whined, grinding herself down on his digits when he stopped moving.

"This isn't enough for your greedy pussy?" She didn't respond, instead wailing against the skin of his neck, drool dripping from her mouth against him.

"More." She rolled her hips, seeking out friction from his unmoving fingers.

"Alright. Alright." He slipped his fingers out, making quick work of unzipping his pants and tugging his boxers over his hard cock. The appendage slapped against his stomach, angry reddened tip already leaking with pre-cum.

"Oh. It's pink!" she yelped, fingers ghosting over the shaft as she examined it.

"Y-yep," he gasped when she wrapped her fingers around it finally.

She giggled when it twitched against her soft palm, lazily jerking him off and watching the way he reacted.

"You want me to put it in?" he asked, peeling her fingers away and replacing them with his own.

She nodded, lifting her hips so he could run the head of him against the silky wet folds of her cunt. He rubbed the tip around her bundle of nerves, giving an adequate amount of time for her to get desperate.

Finally he settled inside her, bottoming out with only a little pain. He stayed still for a moment, letting her get used to the stretch. By the time he started to gently thrust his hips, her pussy was already drooling around him.

Her legs were shaking, doing no favors In helping her fuck herself on his cock. His hips thrusting up into her were doing most of the work along with his hands cupping her waist and sliding her over him like a pocket pussy.

It was only minutes before she was spasming around him, one hand tangled in his hair while the other was clawing at the neck of his shirt.

"S'good," he slurred, cum spilling inside of her at the same time as she convulsed in pleasure.

"mmmMMm," she moaned, slumping against him, exhausted and drowsy.

"Was that good?" he asked, far too shy for their current situation. Both of their laps were sopping with their combined fluids before he even pulled out.

"Yeah," she murmured, nuzzling her head against his chest affectionally.

"I still don't know the pythagorean theorem," he joked, giving her a little kiss on the forehead. A bit of affection exchanged before he got up to clean them both off.

taglist here:

@angelsarecallin @sebby-staan @niviiera @chaoticgurl @evqans @slut-for-matt-murdock @multihaven @tinyboxxtink @hold-our-destiny @weh-heh-heh @battiebabe216 @captain-satan @avril-reblog-cave @dragon-ash13 @stxvercgersslut  @fangirl199812 @variety-fangirl @buckybeefybarnes @strangerthings64 @baddestbiddiesonly

(lmk if you want to be added)

#eddie munson stranger things #stranger things season 4 #stranger things #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson smut #eddie stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fluff

[especiallythewomenandthechildren]

As If Destiny (part five) 🌹

Part Four🌹

Warnings: Terminal illness, parent death, death and brutality (it is the hunger games after all) characters may be ooc. I read the book a while ago but don't really remember much of Snows way of thinking (I mean I know its toxic and insane but yk the other things) so I will mostly be basing off the film and my own thoughts. Also I can't spell for the life of me so be prepared for bad spelling and grammar. Enjoy loves!

⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆

"I do hope you know that if we are even a minute late, I will be serving detention for the rest of the year." 

The slightly anxious tone of Coryo's voice broke you out of your memorized state. You both were in a rush out of his penthouse and you weren't sure how long it would take to get to the academy, but against your best intentions, you had to stop for the flowers.

Something about their white petals and fresh arouma just sucked you in.

With a reluctant sigh, you forced your legs to move.

"But you are the perfect student. You've never been late and every member of the staff loves you."

It was true. There didn't seem to be a single person in the Capital who wasn't charmed with Coriolanus Snow.

But he just shook his head, shifting his eyes forward and quickly pressing the button to allow for pedestrians cross the intersection.

"Everyone but Dean Highbottom."

Oh yes.

He was unfortunately right.

That was indeed the one person who seemed to despise Coryo.

And for seemingly no reason. He always seemed to be able to chide or insult the boy whenever given the chance.

When the signal lit up, the boy in question took your hand to follow him across the street.

"You know, I remember once Highbottom saw us talking after I gave you back your book for Satryia's class. After we parted ways, he pulled me aside and told me to stay away from you. Something about how it didn't end well the first time. Do you have any idea what he was talking about?" 

Still holding your hand, even being far from the dangers of the intersection, the boy turns his head to you. His eyes showed just as much confusion as yours did but with a hint of anger.

Dean Highbottom didn't have to like him but who is he to warn you to stay away from him? And what does he mean the first time? 

The conversation seemed to trail off there but neither of you minded. You didn't come to this part of the Capital very often so you were lost in fascination and wonder. The city was being rebuilt all around you and you couldn't help but feel giddy.

Coriolanus was lost in watching your reactions. He was feeling a sense of pride to know that he was the one who opened this side of the Capital for you. Not to mention the reason you got some proper sleep. 

He was thinking back on your conversation when he nudged your nearby shoulder with his. You looked back to see the tall boy with a little smirk on his lips. You couldn't help but laugh and question the movement. 

"Nothing, it's just nice to know you remembered the book." 

The comment made a pink tint appear on your cheeks, now very visible in the morning light.

"Of course I remember! I'm sure Satryia would have had my head! You were my knight in shining armor."

Then it was your turn to nudge him back. His pride swelled even more at the memory. To know that he was able to give you something that you not only wanted but needed. Even if it was just a lousy textbook.

It made him feel accomplished. 

Within a few strides, the magnificent structure of the Academy came into view and it somehow even looked more beautiful than usual to you.

Everything did after last night.

"Oh! I forgot to give you this!"

He let go of your still clasped hands and grabbed something from his bag. You were surprised by Coryo's confession but even more suprized by the radiant flower in his hand. You couldn't help but gasp at the gesture. You looked up at him with your beautiful eyes, shining up at him with wonder and gratitude. He smiled down at you, heart swelling.

"You seemed so mesmerized so I thought you would like one of your own." 

You took the flower gently and thanked him with the most beautiful smile he has ever received.

He was already scheming of ways to see it more often. 

"Could you put in my hair?"

Then you were blessed with the most beautiful smile you've seen. He happily agreed and put it in the back of your hair, in the hair tie of your half up, half down style.

Something you've never worn before to the academy but something Coryo reassured you looked good.

Once assured the flower wouldn't fall, the tall boy stepped out from behind you with a satisfied smile.

"You know one of these days I'll show you Grandma'am's rose garden. Maybe even get you a bouquet."

He knew the day when he would be able to bring you full bouquets of her precious roses is far away. But maybe after he won the Plinth Prize, he would get his Grandma'am chocolate, Tigris a new dress, and packets of rose seeds.

Enough so everyday he could give you a fresh flower that you would cherish.

His wishful thinking nearly made him miss your response.

"I think I would fall right then and there if you did Coryo."

You looked at him as you confessed but quickly looker away, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks. Heat that only grew more intense as Coriolanus's stare did the same.

He didn't know if you meant you would fall is in pass out or fall as in... well fall. for him.

oh as if he needed anymore motivation to win the coveted Plinth Prize. 

Since you never come from this direction, you can't see the usual spot Sejanus would be sitting at when waited for you. Was he getting worried? Your eyes scan the area but couldn't seem to find the brunette anywhere.

But, for better or worse, you found your quite eccentric group of friends.

"Coryo! Y/N!" Clemensia's voice carried through the morning air as you both marched up the stairs.

You both greeted her as well as Arachne, Festus, and Felix upon your arrival. They all seemed happy to see you two (especially you as you are often strolling with Sejanus). But Arachne seemed to be looking you both up and down with a mischievous smirk playing on her colored lips. Nothing new but unnerving nevertheless. 

"Y/N, don't you live on the west side of the city? You always come and leave in that direction."

She looked as if she had caught a lamb for the slaughter. You actually did really like her but the girl has so many problems.

Coriolanus had his mask plastered on again but inside he was beginning to panic. He probably could've made a lie on the spot, a skill he has mastered over the years, but he was worried about your reaction. 

You were a genuine person and he feared that his lie would be completely exposed on your face. But it seemed he was wrong. Instead of freezing up you laughed at Arachne's comment.

"It's beautiful weather this morning and felt in the mood to take a walk around the city. I just happened to meet up with Coryo at the entrance to campus." 

To say the mentioned boy was surprised and relieved would have been an understatement. Not only did you cover up the actual events, you made sure not to let it slip that he walks to the Academy. The illusion that he has a driver like the rest of your peers was still held. Festus then seemed to perk up. 

"I still don't understand why in the world you would decide to walk somewhere. We have drivers for a reason."

The others nodded in agreement and you couldn't but help sigh. You have known your friends since as long as you could remember. You have seen them grow up (or the lack there of).

They are still the small scared children who had to burn their picture books for warmth in the Dark Days. They may have physically aged, but you know they never really grew up. Your peers simply hid their fears and insecurities behind their wealth and luxury.

Anything outside of the opulence that surrounded them brought fear and as a result, a great distaste.

That's why Sejanus was so disliked. He was too much of an irregularity. Too other. 

As he drifted to your mind, your eyes drifted to the other side of the stairs, shifting your neck to try to get a better view. 

"Don't worry, your little side kick is coming up."

Felix let you know with a nod of his head over your shoulder, making you turn around and spotting Sejanus looking confused at you. You smiled in invitation and he began taking a cautious walk up the vast stairs. 

Arachne couldn't help but scoff.

"Wonder what little district boy would do without his precious y/n to hold his hand wherever he goes."

Your mouth opened to shoot back a response when Sejanus gave one of his own. 

"Maybe you will see where it would hit if it wasn't being held."

He even gave a mocking smile to go with it. 

And this is why your two friend groups are separate. 

Before any teeth could be knocked out or venom spit, you were quick to grab his arm and pull him away. You look over your shoulder with a rushed and apologetic farewell to the group.

But your eyes met those ever shining blue orbs and gave a private smile. A smile he couldn't help but return.

"What are you smiling at Snow?"

Festus croked. He had frankly forgotten his friends around him, way too lost on your retreating form. 

"Well that was entertaining if I must say." He covered up his slip.

The look on Arachne's face begged to differ.

But reassurance came in Clemensia's laugh, followed by Felix.

"I would actually like to see what would happen with you and Plinth in a room with no y/n to mediate Crane." Felix seemed quite entertained with the thought. 

The girl just rolled her eyes and began her march into the building, clear irritation radiating off of her.

The rest of the group followed suit and walked into the posh institution.

"Feel bad for whoever unfortunately walks infront of her path" Festus quips, much to the enjoyment and humor of his friends.

The same feeling could not be said for Sejanus.

⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆

"So how worried should I be?" Sejanus's warm brown eyes bore into yours. You crooked your head to its side in confusion.

"Care to explain Sej?" 

"I think I'm the one who needs an explanation y/n. You never came to our spot and you were instead with them."

He spit out the word as if it was acid.

"Not to mention the fact that we got a call from your father thanking us for letting you stay with us last night. Would you care to enlighten me how I either missed your presence the entire night, morning, and ride here or where you actually were."

His tone was harsh but you knew it came from a place of worry. He knew of your sleepless habits and to be informed that you were supposed to be with him but weren't must have been horrifying. 

You weren't sure if you should tell him the whole truth about staying with Coriolanus. So you tell him the same thing you told Rhayes, your driver, last night.

"I was with a friend. I'm sorry I worried you Sejanus. I had no idea he called you and made you worry." 

He looked at you with a puzzled and slight irritated expression.

"What friend y/n? And if you couldn't stay at your house, you know our door is always open."

You weren't exactly sure why he was so upset at the situation but you felt he deserved some semblance of an answer. 

"You guys do enough for me as it is. No- stop don't even try to argue with me on this. Can - can we just drop this?" You sighed, clearly not wanting to continue on this topic.

Sejanus looked the exact opposite, wanting to flesh out every detail. But he noticed your discomfort and let the conversation end there. 

You both had been walking around the halls, him not really realizing the path you were taking untill you came to a stop and began looking through your bag.

The kind boy, for what seemed the first time that morning, took in your appearance. 

"You look well rested. Back to life." He says it astonished. You couldn't help but roll your eyes. 

"I know! Weird seeing me look like an actual person instead of zombie." You were expecting a witty remark back but you were met with another amazed observation. 

"You kept your hair down. And look it has a flower!"

You laughed at his behavior and found your mass pile of somehow pristine papers. You flipped through the pages with apprehension at your work.

"And you finished your paper! What happened to you last night?!"

He just seemed to keep on getting more and more lost. Your smile grew in amusement of his reaction and you both walked into class. Sejanus made his way up to your elevated section of desks while you made your way to your Professor.

Professor Rhaen was a tall and lengthy man who seems more aged than any person of his middle age should be. His pale skin seemed sickly and was scattered with small marks and freckles.

He was bent over his desk, deep into a thick book. You cleared your throat and his eyes snapped up to your slightly timid figure.

"Good morning Professor. I understand that you gave us an extended amount of time for our paper to ensure we properly research. But I fear I got too carried away and seemed to have finished a bit early."

You held up your own thick stack of papers with a humble smile. The man didn't take your papers right away, leaving your hand hanging while he was analyzing.

After a few painfully akward moments, he finally took the stack from your hands. You were going to make your way to seat before he motioned for you to wait.

He was scanning through as you just stood there, in the front of the room and felt quite small. You looked up towards the direction of your desk and saw Sejanus give you a smile and a thumbs up in encouragement.

You smiled back, with a little more reassurance and turned to your professor who seemed to be very focused. The sounds of your classmates coming in was heard as their gazes were felt.

Forever seemed to pass before Professor Rhaen gave you the go ahead to sit down. You gave a giddy sigh of relief before you were stopped by his voice.

"Y/n!" You turned slowly and slightly reluctantly. "

From what I've seen so far, I think I will be nothing less than impressed."

What.

Professor Rhaen does not give compliments. You felt over the moon but gave a polite nod and rushed to your desk.

You didn't realize that Coriolanus and the others had made it to class until you reached the area of your desk. You had to squeeze past the blonde boy and as soon as you sat down, you had to turn behind you.

"Wait you already finished your paper?"

Clemmies pretty face was contorted in baffelment. You just smiled and shrugged. The scoffs of impresment (and intimidation) of Felix, Festus, and Arachne were quite audible even as you turned around.

Sejanus took in your interaction and noticed how neither Clemensia nor Arachne knew of your progress. Something they clearly would have if you stayed at their penthouses last night.

But what was even more puzzling was your shared look with Coriolanus who seemed to have a bit of a smug and proud smile on his face.

Like he knew. 

Any questions were caught off by the scratchy voice of the professor. His lecture was not necessarily interesting, but today for the first time in a long time, you were able to be fully focused.

You followed every word and participated whenever you could. You were so engaged with the lesson that you barely realized the pen that landed by your shoes.

Grabbing it in a swift motion, you looked up to see Coriolanus with a smug smirk.

Oh that little-

"See what happens when you get a proper sleep." He teased you, slightly crouched, mirroring your position. 

You gave a soft scoff at his comment which only made his expression grow.

"A night of good rest, a compliment from Rhaen, and an intimated Arachne? You're on fire y/n." He whispered. 

"Trying to suck up to the new favorite student Snow?" You teased back.

The close proximity of your position allowing for the heat of your breath to be felt on the boys cheeks.

That's the reason for the red on it right? 

His devious smirk only expanded, showing a few of his perfect and pearly white teeth. He opened his mouth to fire back his own witty response before he was cut off by a clearly displeased Dean Casca Highbottom. 

"Miss Vaun and Mr. Snow."

It seemed that even having the two of your names in the same sentence drained him off all his energy.

"Why am I not surprised. Well whatever it is that you two were discussing, I hope it was more important than your professor's lecture." 

The embarrassment of the public scolding and the silence of the room was suffocating.

And he knew it.

He seemed to relish in your discomfort and Coriolanus's annoyance. 

His eyes seemed to be coated with a fog as he was lost to his mind and whatever he was thinking. The realization of reality and his intention of the interruption seemed to bring him back to reality. 

"Please pack up your things Miss y/n. It is urgent."

Your reaction to his words was panic.

Absolute panic.

Emotion you had to swallow, even as your breathing accelerated. You were shaking as you basically threw your material in your bag, with no care of the impact.

Dean Highbottom had already left the room and was waiting in the hallway by the time you met up with him. You felt nauseous and walked on heavy feet.

Coriolanus could see the unsteady steps you took and wanted nothing more than steady you.

But he could do nothing.

And that's the part he hated most.

He sighed and tried to focus back on the lecture and the notes he was supposed to take. Then he realized you must have taken his pen by accident. 

And he was right but you weren't really conscious as you twirled that very same pen in you hands in apprehension.

Something happened to her.

That happened to her.

You both reached the main office and you hoped that all your fears would be resolved. But you looked up to see your father in a state of varying levels of dishevelment. He looked pale, starved, and hollow.

But worst of all were the tears in his eyes and clear stains on his cheek. No.

No. 

You felt the world shrink around you as he opened up his palm to reveal a beautiful golden necklace. A necklace that held two rings.

The same necklace that your mother wore without fail.

The one she swore she would never take off till death did her part.

Till death do you part.

⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆⋇⋆✦⋆

A/N: another part down! I hope you all liked it! I was scared of how it was gonna turn out at first but kinda liked it. I hope you guys saw the desk scene as I imagined it (both you and coryo kinda crouched and close as you whispered). I imagined it as if it was a movie and the shot would be showing your side profiles as you talked in those fancy curved desk things in the movie. Also if things don't make sense, I'm sorry it's 1 am and I have been working on it for hours and I'm sleepy lol! Much love as always!

@notyourwildestdream 🌹@darktrashsoulbear🌹@fantasylovestoryme 🌹@nekee-lilac02 🌹@a-avengerparker🌹 @queenofshinigamis 🌹

#coriolanus snow #coriolanus x reader #the hunger games #snow lands on top #tbosas #ballad of songbirds and snakes #reader insert #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #coriolanus x you #hunger games #coryo snow #sejanus plinth #tigris snow #Coriolanus #sejanus my beloved #sejanus x reader #sejanus deserved better #arachne #clemensia dovecote #arachne crane #festus creed #felix ravinstill #the capital

[azuremist]

Cohost sucks, too (but not for the reasons that one user said)

So, you may recall a person on tumblr saying that Cohost sucks, which accused a transfem on the cohost team of predatory behavior. That was transmisogynistic bullshit, and was blatantly untrue.

But cohost does suck. Just for reasons unrelated to that.

Listing everything loosely in an order of “weird and sort of annoying” to “holy fuck”:

Tag capitalization is determined by how the first person who used the tag capitalized it

You have to personally email support and wait for them to get back to you if you want to delete your account

They call themselves a “not for profit” or “non profit”, despite being registered as a for profit LLC

There is only one moderator for this site of 30k+ users, which means reports aren’t responded to for weeks at a time

Staff and the userbase have a very odd parasocial relationship. The staff chronically overshares, call users their ‘friends’, and have gotten mad at users for reporting too many things on weekends, after hours, or holidays (with the subtext being that you should not expect them to do anything after hours). They even publicly post about how they are worried about paying rent because of the site’s financial situation, which is frankly disgusting. Especially when you see people in the comments barely able to scrape up the $5 USD to give them for the subscription service.

A member of staff publicly bragged about how Cloudflare forgot to bill them for hosting, which is not only wildly unprofessional, but could likely get them sued. (And Cloudflare could, at any time, ask them for the money they owe, for the record.)

Staff say that they want to be transparent with financials, but are incredibly inconsistent about financial updates

The platform is losing $10k-40k USD each month

Meanwhile, staff currently pays themselves $94k USD a year, per person. Sure, that’s not as much as the average person with their job title… but Cohost is losing tens of thousands of dollars each and every month, so that doesn’t really apply.

On top of the previous two points, staff doesn’t accept volunteers, and they’ve consistently implemented features that make no difference to the financials of the company

TL;DR:

The cohost staff are tech people who wanted to do a startup, got a loan from a rich friend, and is doing nothing to make the site sustainable. Meanwhile, they’re paying themselves almost $100k USD a year while still guilt-tripping their dirt-poor, largely queer userbase.

It sucks, because I really believe Cohost could succeed. You know what, no — I know Cohost could succeed. Between the Elon Musk-ification of Twitter (who has deemed Tweeting “I hate trans people” fine, but automatically blocks people from Tweeting “I hate cis people” for hate speech), and the owner of tumblr going mask-off transphobic Zionist… Right now, maybe more than ever, there is a serious niche of ‘social media for queer fandom nerds’, just waiting to be filled! And on the surface, Cohost is perfect!

And I like everything about Cohost… except for how it’s being managed. I want to see it succeed, because it could be amazing, if the people behind it just made better decisions. But, ultimately, I do not trust the people running Cohost to help it realize its potential.

Alas, it seems this isn’t the tumblr alternative we are looking for.

#cohost #tumblr #tumblr alternative #long post #azure does a thing #this one’s been cooking for a lil while

[crooked-wasteland]

i used to watch hazbin hotel when i first came out but i don’t anymore because now i know and understand how much of a horrible person the creator actually is and also i learned that the “humour” in the show isn’t “edgy” or anything it’s just straight up harmful and bad

i have friends who still watch the show and are unaware of the things the creator has said and done how do i tell them that the show they’ve been watching for years and have been able to find that rare and genuine interest in sucks and is made by a horrible person?

The thing I've come to realize is that a lot of people will rationalize anything because they would rather believe a certain way. People can rationalize everything from a snide comment to literal genocide if they would really rather believe something is X rather than Y. So, really, there is nothing to do about what your friends like. If you would rather avoid discussion of the show and such while keeping your friends, just discuss other things you all can still connect on. Other Fandom or special interests.

Alternatively, something I have taken great joy in is reworking the material for Helluva Boss into something better. The one thing I will always maintain is that there is an idea of something that could have been good in this mess. Regardless of how one feels about Medrano, there was the potential in this show to have a legitimately good, mature story. There is no harm in retooling what is here to still engage with your friends in the fandom. Steer the conversation towards AUs or deconstructing characters to fit a better narrative.

I personally am working on essays on how the show could have been done differently so that it could capitalize on its attempts to be a mature drama comedy by retooling the characters and story. It's something that I think could present an alternative vision of what the show could have been if it was actually good. Of course, some people will claim that I'm just unhappy the show didn't go the way I wanted it. However, I think any choice I would make would still be far more coherent and interesting than the actual media.

So, yeah. I'll be posting more things along those lines since I think there are only so many times you can give the same criticism. Vivienne has deemed that the repetition is the result of a lack of originality and copycats and not a representation of how often she makes the same mistakes. So I figure just doing things better is a more constructive use of my time.

#helluva boss critical #helluva boss criticism #helluva boss critique #vivienne medrano #vivziepop #helluva boss #vivziepop critical #spindlehorse critical #spindlehorse criticism #anon ask

[grandhotelabyss]

Any thoughts on nick land / mark fisher?

I've encountered both of them essentially as bloggers—I don't think I've ever read a word of either on paper—so I can't say I've studied them formally or mastered their thinking.

Land's concept of capital as autonomous alien intelligence assembling itself through retroaction on human agents—do I have this right?—is fun science fiction. I accept that as a theory of cultural temporality in general but not necessarily as a theory of technology or capitalism in particular. As for his more (shall we say) "ethnic" idea about "exit" and the Anglo character—maybe there's something to that. Modern history as the struggle between decentralized commercial sea empires (UK, US) and despotic communist land empires (Germany, Russia, China). And his new thing about Anglo-Zionism—I believe he's read Milton deeply—is right on time. All his Compact pieces on the English canon are paywalled, so I haven't read them, but it seems like he's approaching the idea that the God of the Bible is the force he previously identified as capital. (I think this is similar to what Mitchell Heisman outlined in his Suicide Note, but I only read some of that, and only once, on one sleepless night over 10 years ago, and doubt I'll revisit it. Does Heisman cite Land? I don't recall.) Hyperstition is real, as any manifestation girl on here or on TikTok or on YouTube will tell you.

Now Fisher was a sad case. I think all that anti-humanist theory did him no favors, personally. I'm not sure he could stand in that desolate place, the way Land could. I don't believe I ever directly interacted with him online when we both were bloggers in the same milieu circa 2005 or so. Maybe once or twice. He had a positive Marxist take on Batman Begins, and I had a negative one, and I think somebody sent him mine when he had comments open. (He had a whole thing, which anticipated the "vampire's castle" image, about "gray vampires" who stalk the comments section and suck the life out of your imaginative assertions with their point-missing nitpickery. He wasn't wrong!) I'm sure he thought I was hideously naive if he ever thought about me at all, and I was naive, I was essentially a Stalinist, an obvious example of humanist theory gone wrong, but there are limits, too, to that gothic style he picked up from Land and the CCRU.

I think he said Kafka was his first major author. There's a case to be made that you should read Kafka only after Dickens. (I don't mean literally but metonymically. Nor do I mean the 19th century vs. the 20th or even realism vs. modernism. Replace Kafka with Baudelaire and Dickens with Joyce and it'll mean the same.) And I'm not talking about politics here or even ethics. No panacea for politics and ethics can be found in books. Kafka, for that matter, was probably a nicer guy qua guy than Dickens was. But, just as someone who has to live in the world in your skin, it can't hurt to read a non-anti-humanist book from time to time if you're a bookish person. To not always try to conceptually outflank as a ruse of power every obvious humane sentiment. And to try not to need your humane sentiments to be conveyed only by the most alienating stimulus, to need them to come in the form of their opposite. I never got over his review of The Passion of the Christ:

What, from one perspective, is the utter humiliation and degradation of Jesus's body is on the other a coldly ruthless vision of the body liberated from the 'wisdom and limits of the organism'.

Masochristianity.

Christ's Example is simply this: it is better to die than to pass on abuse virus or to in any way vindicate the idiot vacuity and stupidity of the World of authority.

Power depends upon the weakness of the organism. When authority is seriously challenged, when its tolerance is tested to the limit, it has the ultimate recourse of torture. The slow, graphic scenes of mindless physical degradation in The Passion of the Christ are necessary for revealing the horrors to which Jesus' organism was subject. It is made clear that he could have escaped the excruciating agony simply by renouncing his Truth and by assenting to the Authority of the World. Christ's Example insists: better to let the organism be tortured to death ('If thine own eye offend thee, pluck it out') than to bow, bent-headed, to Authority.

This is what is perhaps most astonishing about Gibson's film. Far from being a statement of Catholic bigotry, it can only be read as an anti-authoritarian AND THEREFORE anti-Catholic film. For the Pharisees of two millennia ago, puffed up in their absurd finery, substitute the child-abuser apologists of today's gilt-laden, guilt-ridden Vatican. Against all the odds, against two thousand years of cover-ups and dissimulation, The Passion of the Christ recovers the original Christ, the anti-Wordly but not otherwordly Christ of Liberation Theology: the Gnostic herald of Apocalypse Now.

This is why I found him frustrating when I read him as a daily blogger almost 20 years ago. Plus the over-solemnity about pop-culture ephemera. I found him a bit naive, too, in the end, though he was almost 15 years my senior. I also sometimes just didn't and don't know what he was talking about, because I sort of hated and hate theory.

In his purely political commentary, he was right, however, to focus on bureaucratization as an effect of neoliberalism—the way capitalism and communism converge in the present for the worst of both worlds, everything is at once a competition and frozen in a statist hierarchy. I'm not sure I'm persuaded by the "hauntology" thesis. I've thought through that issue in a different way and am not convinced the end of the myth of the revolution or the myth of the avant-garde has to mean that we have no future. In fact it might mean the opposite. But good for him for putting into public consciousness an interesting and melancholically beautiful idea that would otherwise have remained confined to smug Derrida-readers.

He is fun to read. That's the highest compliment I can pay. I'm sure the big K-Punk book is a wonderful thing to own and to browse through: to watch a movie or read a book or listen to an album and then see what he had to say about it. He was one model of the blogger as true essayist.

#nick land #mark fisher

[cursedpinterest]

the thing that makes me so annoyed about pinterest is that its made up mostly of kids who were regarded as so funny in kindergarten for whatever reason and internalized that as their only personality trait and later saw tumblr screenshots and because they didn't have any actual natural humor they decided the real way to be funny is just to be insanely hostile and #random to complete strangers. if I have to see one more kid repeating the "theres a headless corpse in the dumpster behind payless" joke on random comments from people who don't care, i'm gonna explode. please. please just look into how to develop social skills. there are worksheets free online I promise its okay to use them.

part 2 of what makes pinterest annoying is that nobody on that website knows what bait is and takes everything completely seriously and at face value and has absolutely no critical thinking skills and doesn't know how to absorb information and create their own opinions based off of that, they just believe everything they're told as long as it makes a little bit of sense to them. it doesn't have to make sense in the real world (ex: people identifying as animesexual or furries demanding litter boxes in school bathrooms), it just has to be ridiculous so they can react strongly to the idea rather than the actual reality of it. its also a dangerous mindset when you get real deep into it because it means they take whatever bait they can - and that's a tactic. there's tons of people who comment stuff on tiktoks like "fat women can't pull off short skirts or crop tops" or "you can't dance i bet you can't do this provocative dance" and they take the bait so easily because they've been taught that its funny to #own bigots and idiots online, and being funny is more important being safe. its genuinely horrifying.

omg the bait thing is so real. like people just farm outrage clicks and comments to get more traction and views, you see this a lot on facebook and twitter too, like someone saying something very obviously egregious and millions of people flood the comments in a huff. or they do that thing where they're like "omg people are so stupid how do you not know that miami is the capital of florida", which is just BEGGING for people to go into the comments to correct them like "ummm actually the capital of florida is tallahassee so actually you're stupid", falling into the OP's engagement trap hook, line, and sinker. its very competitive, people don't know how to let things go, they HAVE TO correct and one-up others and feel smarter than them, even when other people have commented the same thing already. they have to let their voice be known, even if its saying the exact same thing as thousands of others. individualism at its finest.

and honestly, i get it. it's hard to pull away, see something batshit and not respond. its hard bc people on pinterest are so naïve, but that's just a symptom of having a userbase consisting of mostly older conservatives and very young teens that happen to intersect at times. it ties into whole the #owning bigots thing too, like they'd rather make fun of obviously terrible people then help or support people that are being targeted. like ok, you hate terfs. now what do you do to support trans people outside of making memes about how terfs suck? this is why that stupid harry potter game is still trending, bc people refuse to block, ignore, mute stupid terfs who are chomping at the bits for a fight and have to argue with them and make memes, which is only aggravating it's notoriety.

#and yes the whole humor thing #a group of ppl trying to be the funniest in the room is so exhausting #like theyre always going into the comments of like art or poetry and so quick to make a joke or reference a meme #like when is the last time you stepped back and consumed art deeply and unironically. quickly.

[usauthoritarianism]

OK So Context

I kind of progressively lost my mind in college. What with the learning about the specifics of what is going on and how it relates to what has happened in the past. -and subsequently took the time to develop a series of presentations about why the US sucks.

Specifically, the interventions in Latin American, just the astoundingly predatory nature of American Capitalism domestically and The Police, like, as a concept.

Fast forward to the Summer of 2022 and I realized that working with an editor and publishing a book is hard and expensive but its measured in thousands not tens of thousands so I committed to doing that at some point in my life with this project, and began working on adapting the presentations with more research and more connections between these different expressions of White Supremacy.

I let the research balloon. There's just so much.

Anyway, the whole social media campaign thing was to distract me from pinning all that down. -and last month one of the members of my subreddit, u/acebush1, self immolated in the time it took to get around to responding to his most recent comment. That made this all very real. The US' support for Israel and it's foundation as a settler colonial state are critically relevant.

Right, so,. Last month someone asked me how to buy the book and that was the thing I had said to myself would mark the transition back to a writing and research focus rather than just research and learning social media.

Site is up. Its an email submission form with a set your own price stripe link.

#US Authoritarianism Project #Aaron Bushnell #US Politics #protest #writeblr #History #Colonialism #Imperialism #Police #Duopoly #Democracy #republicans #American Fascism #american exceptionalism #Slavery #Jim Crow #Segregation #Mass Incarceration #reservation #deportation #forced migration #sterilization #eugenics #ethnic cleansing #dred scott #japanese internment #guantanamo #trail of tears #US Authoritarianism #Anarchy

[nayeonline]

My Top 15 K-Pop Songs of 2023

I genuinely don't know how, but somehow we have made it to December 10 2023, exactly 1 year after my top songs of 2022 post which I've decided to make a permanent thing on this blog. This year I was a lot more organized with formulating this list - I created a spotify playlist in January, and any kpop songs I cared about this year I added to it in chronological order. This list includes songs released between 2022/12/10 and 2023/12/10, and is entirely based on my personal opinion - feel free to let me know ur top songs of the year in the comments and rbs <33

(15) BYOB (bring your own best friend) (English Ver.) - Billlie

I just know some eyebrows are being raised but HEAR ME OUT, this song just speaks to me. It’s not a club banger, it's not an anthemic stadium hit, but it is something for the girlies, and I love it.

(14) Girls' Capitalism - TripleS LOVElution

What a hilarious concept for a song, TripleS is too good. Is this song literally just ‘Generation’ the sequel? Yes! I don’t care!! It’s really good!!!

(13) Standing Next To You - Jungkook (BTS)

Now I’m not an army, and none of Jungkook’s previous singles really spoke to me, they were catchy of course but not for me. This song, on the other hand, is artistry. His passion for what he does is so obvious in this song, I am severely impressed.

(12) Spicy - aespa

Aespa just KNOWS how to do a concept. So many other groups would feel stagnant with the futuristic concept, but aespa keep reinventing themselves perfectly while retaining a sound that is so distinctly them. Spicy is peak girl pop; Ningning you outdid yourself on this one.

(11) Drama - aespa

Can aespa release a bad title track??? Drama would probably be higher if it came out earlier, but based on the month I’ve been listening to it, this is an absolute punch up for aespa. Our stint in the real world was fun and all, but we’re in kwangya again and it feels fucking good. Aespa, keep doing what you’re doing, and I’ll keep streaming.

(10) Fast Forward - JEON SOMI

People didn’t like this song this year, but I fucking loved it and this is my list. As a UK resident and 80s music enjoyer, this spoke to me on a molecular level. I know it's trashy, I know it's been done before, I don't care. Fast Forward is amazing.

(9)  In Bloom - ZEROBASEONE

Category is: Boy Group Kpop (but it's actually good). Pure excellence, this is how to sample a classic song, this is how to debut, this is how to break the mold of boy groups and do it with actually good music (cough cough boynextdoor cough cough). Imagine if they kept this energy for their first comeback. Imagine lol

(8) Cherry Talk - TripleS +(KR)ystal Eyes

People (including tripleS stans) loooveee to shit on this song but it’s literally their best song since Generation, and I will stand by that. This is extremely LOONA coded, if you don’t like it, that must suck for you. BOOM CHERRY TALK CHERRY CHERRY TALK.

(7) Cool With You - NewJeans

They’re literally too good. I have no words.

(6) ETA - NewJeans

NewJeans said this year that being consistent hitmakers is easy actually, this song is fucking excellent. Controversially, I love the production, it's so funky and subversive. I got this song from day dot, if you get it you get it, if you don’t you don’t, and if you don’t I feel sorry for you xx

(5) Attitude - fromis_9

This is fromis_9’s second time showing up very high on my yearly roundups, I’m thinking I need to pay more attention to them. This song is the shit I live for in kpop, its SO HIGH QUALITY. Not a second wasted in this song, just pure goodness throughout. Fromis’s ability to be so extremely on trend never ceases to amaze me. This song is really fucking good, and the whole album is too good as well. Fromis_9, you have my attention. (that actually wasn’t on purpose lol)

(4) Air Force One - ODD EYE CIRCLE

Utter euphoria. That’s what this song feels like. LOONA had a rough 2022, and orbits were feeling it. We were boycotting and fighting for the girls to be free of that fucking company, and when we won, we were happy of course, but mostly exhausted. Then Odd Eye Circle dropped ‘Air Force One’. This song feels like a second wind, it builds up and up from the first second, tension rising, exhaustion fading and then ‘ready set and GO’ and its ANTHEMIC. You can exhale now, the work is done, LOONA is fucking back.

(3) OMG - NewJeans

Oh look, more NewJeans. The audacity to release one of the best songs of the year on January 2nd is crazy. ‘OMG’ is so effortlessly catchy, it’s ridiculous. It’s full to the brim of hooks and creative melodies, this is pop music at its best. It’s serotonin in a song, and the ability and self assurance of the members in their skills is palpable, and oozes from the seams of the track. In a somewhat forgettable year of Kpop, NewJeans were constantly reinventing and redefining what a hit is, and OMG is the physical form of that. Congratulations NewJeans, nobody is doing it like you.

(2) Sugarcoat (NATTY Solo) - KISS OF LIFE

I am being deadly serious when I say this song altered something in my brain. I struggle to comprehend how much I love this song, and I’m struggling even more to express that in words. I found Kiss of Love’s other debut songs to be quite fun, but this song eclipses anything they have ever and will ever release. Natty is such a powerhouse, I am in awe of her skill. If you haven’t heard this song, which is upsettingly likely as while this song had a moment on TikTok earlier this year, it was still a quite niche trend that didn’t last long, PLEASE go and listen, this was the best song released in 2023. But, this list doesn’t just include 2023. It also includes that tiny window after December 10 when literally no one releases music. No one except…

(1) Ditto - NewJeans

Ditto is one of those songs where you listen to it for the first time and you’re left a little bit speechless at the end. I don’t think I’m ever going to forget this song, or how it makes me feel. Ditto has changed the kpop industry forever, and it will go down in history as a defining moment of the genre. It’s melancholic and nostalgic and heartfelt, it's laughing through your tears, it’s hugging your best friend before you go your separate paths in life. I still get a little tug on my heart whenever Hyein’s beautiful intro vocals come in, and I think I always will. NewJeans, you’ve released a lot of amazing music this year, but thank you especially for this one, I’ll love it forever.

#billlie #bring your own best friend #triples #lovelution #girls capitalism #jungkook #bts #standing next to you #spicy #aespa #drama #jeon somi #fast forward #zerobaseone #zb1 #in bloom #krystal eyes #cherry talk #newjeans #cool with you #eta #fromis 9 #attitude #unlock my world #odd eye circle #loona #yyxy #loona 1/3 #air force one #omg

[dekusleftsock]

Like good omens? Bc the current climate of bkdk is exactly like what happens with Crowley and Aziraphale. EVERYONE, and i mean, EVERYONE around them realizes they love/want each other in the shortest amount of time possible but not the two guys that have known each other for thousands of years, until like, now and they STILL fucked it up.

DUDE YOURE SO FUCKING TRUE FOR THIS

Good Omens is always a show I knew I would love, but never got around to watching. My friend basically made me binge the entirety of season one a week ago and then I binged all of season two when I got home, and MY GOD. MY GOD. THEY ARE SO MUCH LIKE BKDK AND IT SUCKS.

I feel like this is obvious but Good Omens season 2 spoilers lol.

Aziraphale kinda likes to romanticize the time when Crowley was an Angel WITH HIM. The first scene in season 2 where Crowley and Aziraphale first meet and Aziraphale watches him with puppy dog eyes, all of it reminded me of bkdk’s childhood. And from Izuku’s perspective, it was AMAZING! He got Kacchan all to himself, they were friends, even if he was a bit mean and teased him. But to Bakugou? It felt like Izuku was bullying him, looking down on him. It feels a lot like Crowley’s perspective on heaven. He doesn’t like hell either, but at least they don’t care how things get done, just that it’s done.

AND LIKE, AZIRAPHALE AND CROWLEY HAVE SIMILAR PROBLEMS I KIND OF SEE IZUKU AND KATSUKI HAVING. Losing your sense of identity in the obsession of the one you love, it fucking happens! There’s this post about Crowley and Aziraphale’s relationship that puts this into words so well, and it feels very them, yk? Bkdk feel so so much like the type of people who could get so attached to each other that they lose what makes them, them.

AND MAYBE THATS A STRETCH, BUT YEVAISBISHSISHSHJSB

When togachako’s relationship is built off of your individual senses of identity (who therefore feel a lot like Maggie and Nina in this equation tbh), and bkdk’s is built off of the fact that you’ve never had a point in your life where this person HADNT existed, then you can see how that can turn into a problem—especially for their relationship.

Bkdk is a slowburn built off of a fear of rejection, much like Crowley and Aziraphale. Because if this person ISNT in your life, then who are you really? What makes you, “you”? What makes us, “us”?

Is there really space for “you”, in a sense of self built on “us”?

ALSO AZIRAPHALE SAYING “I FORGIVE YOU” AFTER THAT KISS BROKE MY FUCKING HEART RVEINSUSVSISBUS

Their miscommunication in both bkdk and in Aziraphale/Crowley is so so bad and yet so so relatable why is it like that good lord.

I think what I liked most about season 2 was when Nina made the comment that “everyone else’s love life always seems so much more straight forward than your own”, AND IF THAT ISNT BKDK/TGCK THEN I DONT KNOW WHAT IS LMAO

Oh yeah and the coffee theory is dumb. It very much makes sense for Aziraphale to take the offer that he did. He has said time and time again that heaven has the good guys and hell has the bad guys, there’s just individually good and bad people in both. He has always wanted Crowley to be a part of heaven again, he literally always mentions how Crowley “was an Angel once”.

Aziraphale represents the cult-ish mentality that Christianity can be. He wants to believe that there is a higher power that doesn’t agree with the things angels do and don’t do, because if that isn’t the case, then every belief he has ever been told was built on a lie.

Heaven negates it’s flaws by simply believing that there are individually flawed angels and not that the larger system itself is a problem. This is why metatron says this in his meeting with Gabriel and the other high ranking angels. Gabriel cannot fall or there is a systematic problem, and so long as there isn’t a systematic problem, he will simply be dealt with in the cleanest way possible.

It’s all a capitalism metaphor. If Aziraphale is good enough, if he believes in god and her plan, if he believes in the good Crowley has in his heart, if he believes that a fundamentally flawed system can be changed for the better, if you can somehow work hard enough for your company, you will be rewarded. You will be praised. You will be seen as a person who deserves recognition because you worked hard enough.

But you never work hard enough. There is no plan. There is no infinite peak. It’s just you, in an infinite universe, trying to guess some plan that will never be comprehensible.

LOOK IM OF THE BELIEF THAT GOD HAS HAD NO HAND IN ANY OF THIS SINCE THE BEGINNING, EVERYONES JUST MAKING IT THE FUCK UP. 

This got so far off track bc I have good omens brainrot dear god.

#bkdk #good omens #sorry good omens fans your ship is just very them #togachako

[bookstantrash]

A/N: HELLO HELLO GUESS WHO’S ALIVE!!  After a long time, I am finally posting the very last chapter of this Pride and Prejudice fanfic (this time for real, it truly is the end). I do not know who still reads my stuff (I really need to update my taglist) but I wanted to thank each and everyone who spared a little of their time to read this fic and left a comment, reblogged and liked it. This is the first multichapter fic I’ve written and successfully finished. 

And special thanks to Sim ( @perseusannabeth ) for kindly forcing giving me the idea of writing this. This fic is for you Sim, and also for all the regency lovers out there.

That being said, this chapter finally has some smut, after all that sexual tension and teasing in the last chapters. It is the first time I write smut so I am sorry in advance if it deeply sucks. I hope your inner regency whores can be at least 1% satisfied with what I came up with.

This is also 10K, the longest I have ever written so everyone better be reading this because I will not be doing it again. I got safely rid of Sim’s disease.

Beyond my dreams

One day.

Cassian was getting married in one day.

Everything had been checked and rechecked to make sure nothing was amiss, leaving Cassian with nothing else to do except wait for tomorrow.

He hated waiting.

Hated that he had to sit still and wait for the sun to set and rise again, announcing a new day, so he could stand at the aisle and watch Nesta walk in his direction. Suddenly he missed all the buffet tastings and discussions about different table clothes, if only because that gave him something to do.

He had tried training to blow off some steam, overseeing the capitol’s guard from sunrise until lunch.

He had then gone to the Archeron Manor to invite Nesta for lunch, but her sisters, Emerie and Gwyn had blocked his way, saying he could not see Nesta until tomorrow and that they were going to spend the whole day “preparing her”. Even his sister, Georgiana, was there, waving goodbye at him as the door was closed on his face.

He ended up having lunch with Azriel and they killed some time off going to their favourite club in town, meeting up with Balthazar, which meant Cassian once again was dragged to take part in their ridiculous competitions. He had gone back to his apartment when he had gotten fed up with their antics, trying to read a book to distract himself.

He read sixteen out of thirty chapters when he got bored. Not even a nap made time pass faster. The day before his wedding still had eight hours and forty minutes until it was over and he was running out of things to do to keep himself busy. It was then that he remembered the file package that had arrived by mail while he was away at the gentlemen’s club with Azriel and Balthazar.

Grabbing his letter opener, he cut the package, spilling the block of papers on his table. They were about properties in the countryside, with information regarding their price, size, location and availability to move in. He threw himself over the papers, writing the pros and cons of each one, glad he had something to help him forget about how many hours and minutes the day still had. Cassian was so focused that he did not hear either Azriel or Morrigan getting in his apartment and walking into his study, the sun already setting.

“I cannot believe you brought work to the capital at your wedding week. We came here to invite you out to distract you and we find you working!” Mor exclaimed “Did you not have anything better to do?”

“This is not work Mor” he grumbled, discarding one property due to its location.

“Why are you looking at castles?” Azriel asked, having grabbed one of the various papers in the desk “Do not tell me you bought Nesta a castle as a wedding gift. I thought she liked Pemberley. Besides, don’t you two have enough houses as it is?”

“Give me back that” Cassian said in annoyance, snatching the paper “I have not bought anything yet, I am just looking at it. And it is not for Nesta, I already have her gift in mind”

“Then why are you doing this?” Mor inquired with curiosity.

“I am looking for a castle to gift to Georgie,” he mumbled.

“What was that?” Azriel said with a smirk that meant he had heard his brother vert well.

“I said that this is a gift for Georgiana,” Cassian said a bit louder “as a thank you present for being a good wing woman for me and Nesta.”

“You and Rhys spoil Georgie too much,” Azriel snorted, “first the horse and now a castle. What else are you going to give her?”

“As if you did not import those silks from abroad and asked Emerie to design new dresses for her coming of age ceremony and debut” Cassian said mockingly.

“You three stupid boys spoil that girl too much” Mor intervened before Azriel could reply and they started listing all things they had ever gifted the young girl “Enough of this. Rhys is waiting for us at his and Feyre’s home. God knows how much whining I had to listen to because he was all alone now that Feyre is with Nesta”

“So now we have to go there to listen to his whining too?” Azriel asked with annoyance.

“Of course. My poor ears have had enough. As his brothers you have to share the burden” she gave them a feline smile “My dear cousin also happens to have a rather large wine cellar, which I think we should make use of.”

“You just want the excuse of me getting married to raid his cellar,” Cassian said, but he began rearranging his papers.

Mor only waved a hand, dismissing his words “Semantics, Cass.”

“Nesta will kill you if you show up hungover to your wedding Cassian” Azriel noted, making Cassian roll his eyes.

“I am not stupid enough to drink myself into oblivion and bring Nesta’s wrath on our wedding day.” he raised a finger in warning at Mor “A few glasses and that is it. I am not ruining tomorrow for Nesta.’

“Relax mister groom,” Mor said “You and Rhys can cry together about how much you miss your wifes while me and Azriel drink.”

“Or maybe Azriel will join your sorry asses and whine about how pretty Gwyn looks underneath the theatre lights while I drink the wine all by myself” she added with a sly grin at Azriel, who muttered something under his breath and left the room.

“If you don’t hurry I will leave you both!” he shouted.

“Everyone but Gwyn has already noticed his affections” Mor sighed, lacing her arm with Cassian’s as they followed Azriel “They better marry before the next season is over or I will punch him”

“I can hold him for you” Cassian said with a shuckle, agreeing with Mor that his brother should be bolder when it came to his advances towards the red headed singer.

Maybe after a few drinks he could convince his brother to make his advances clearer from now on.

~•~

Any minute now.

Any minute now Nesta would walk through the doors and the ceremony would begin.

And they would be married.

Cassian was terrified.

“Stop fidgeting” Emerie hissed as she made sure his suit was in place “You will wrinkle my masterpiece and if my masterpiece is wrinkled I will kill you and Nesta will have to marry a corpse.”

“Sorry Emerie” Cassian said, taking a deep breath “I will try to be as still as possible.”

Emerie gave him a soft smile “You got this big guy”

“Oh, and try not to faint when Nesta walks in.” she added with a wink as she moved to her seat.

“Thanks, that makes me even more relaxed,” he grumbled.

You can do this, Cassian thought to himself as he took a deep breath, you survived countless battles and faced much more dangerous things than a two hour ceremony where you marry the love of your life.

“Hey, are you okay Cass?” Rhysand asked when he noticed how pale his brother was.

“I am going to throw up,” Cassian blurted out “Were you this nervous when you got married to Feyre? I should not be nervous, I mean, Nesta already agreed to marry me right? There is nothing to fear”

Rhysand chuckled, putting a hand on Cassian’s shoulders. “I was terrified while I waited for Feyre to walk down the aisle. And I spent the previous night throwing my guts up with nerves.”

“This is a normal feeling, Cass. It is a big step, getting married, even more to someone you feel so deeply about.” he added, squeezing his brother’ shoulder “You know that me and Nesta have our differences, but it is clear as day how much you two suit each other. And I have not seen her less grumpy than when she is with you.”

“Thank you, Rhys. This means a lot to me.” Cassian really appreciated Rhysand’s words. Not only they calmed him down a little but it also made him happy to know that his brother and Nesta were maybe getting along a little better now.

Music started and Rhysand gave Cassian’ shoulder one last squeeze before he went back to his place. Soon after that, Gwyn began to sing and Cassian knew that would be the cue for Nesta to enter.

If he wasn’t so busy getting lost in Nesta’s eyes as she walked down the aisle, he would have noticed that Azriel — differently from the other guests — was staring at where Gwyn was singing from the side of the front row of benches. The prima donna had wanted to make sure her dear friend’s wedding was as memorable as possible and — according to her — no one was up to the task to sing at the ceremony except her.

But Cassian would lose this teasing ammunition against his brother, for Nesta was so breathtaking he could see her and her only. It was as if the whole world had disappeared and it was just him and Nesta, even Gwyn’s heavenly singing fading in the background.

Emerie had really outdone herself with Nesta’s wedding dress, so much so that her earlier remark of him fainting was not so funny right now. As per tradition, the dress was white, but the arabesques and details in gold — not to mention the rich embroidery at the dress’ hem — made it very unique. The off shoulder design with sleeves that ended a little above her elbows and transparent white gloves created the ideal balance of modesty and daring — which was becoming Emerie’s trademark. Nesta’s hair had been braided down her back, the final touch being the full lace veil that was held in place by a delicate tiara.

Those few metres until she arrived at the altar were the longest of his life, and Cassian did not care what his military friends at the ceremony would say about the tears that were streaming down his face as he watched his soon to be wife walk towards him.

“Nes… dear you look stunning” Cassian managed to say as she finally reached him.

“You don’t look bad yourself” she teased, looking with appreciation at his well fitted black suit and combed back hair. Medals from his achievements were pinned to his suit and shone as they reflected the light from church.

“Dear beloved,” began the priest, “we are gathered here today to bless and join Lady Nesta Archeron and Lord Cassian Bardylis in holy matrimony.”

If someone asked Cassian what had happened during the ceremony, he would have to answer that he barely remembered any of it. He tuned out most of the formal chatter, too busy staring at Nesta and trying to catch her attention while she, on the other hand, tried to ignore him and pay attention to what the priest was saying. One moment that he did remember very well — and could never possibly forget — was the moment they exchanged their wedding vows.

“I am not good with words,” Cassian began, the sensation of throwing up having returned with full force “I have the tendency to put my foot in my mouth and say more than I mean or wrongly say what I mean. And then I start to ramble, like I am doing right now”

Cassian chuckled “But this is the most important day of my life. Of our lives. So I spent the whole last week writing and rewriting the perfect speech, one that would make all the guests cry and my beautiful wife ruin her makeup.”

The guests laughed at that and Nesta tried to hold back a smile, the corners of her lips turning up.

“I must have used all the paper I had in my apartment yet I could not seem to come up with what I wanted to write.” Cassian took Nesta’s hands in his, squeezing them “So I come here today, to marry you Nesta Archeron, with no speech but my fumbling words.”

“I come here today to promise you my bleeding heart, which beats for no one but you. Will ever beat only for you. I promise to cherish you, to annoy you with my presence until you ask me to leave and let you read in peace” that made Nesta laugh, her eyes lining with silver “I cannot promise that we will not go through hardships — Cauldron knows what the future holds — but I promise to do everything in my power and beyond to make sure we get through them, together. I promise to always stay by your side, to support you, to protect you.”

“I promise to love you with every fibre of my being. To love you until this life ends and into the next ones after.” Nesta was truly crying now but she was not ashamed of her tears. Let them all see how much she loved this man, how much his words meant to her, more than any riches in the entire world. “I promise you that we will have time to keep falling in love.”

“For someone who claims to be bad with words you did a great job” Nesta sniffed, and Cassian let go of her hands to brush off her tears.

“I should have brought a handkerchief,” he said, his thumbs gently brushing beneath her eyes.

“I also did not expect myself to cry that much so I forgive you” Nesta gently took his hands off her face “Now let me say my vows and make you cry too”

“As you wish” he said, hazel eyes staring deep at her blue-grey ones, as if he could not bear to lose a single thing that she said.

“I am not easy to love. And I do not love easily,” Nesta began, taking a deep breath “But I find myself loving you quite easily, and you in turn have proven to me how easily you love me.”

“When I was a young girl, I dreamed about a love like those in romance books. Dreamed about someone that would love me despite my faults, despite my shortcomings. Dreamed about a knight in shining armour that would protect me” she gave him a watery smile “As I grew up, I started to think that I would never be deserving of such love.That no one would see beneath the social facade I put on and love me for who I truly am, that I was destined for a miserable loveless arranged marriage.”

“But then you appeared with your teasing smile and annoying yet charming attitude. And I began to think that maybe the Mother had heard the prayers of my young self and all this time I had been waiting for you. Because there is no one else for me but you, Cassian Bardylis. There is no one else I would rather trust my heart with than you. I promise to be by your side forever, to support you, to protect you and to love you.”

Nesta had achieved her goal, for Cassian was crying even more than when she had walked down the aisle.

“You made me ruin my makeup,” he joked, Nesta gently brushing his tears away as he had done with her. The rest of the ceremony went by very fast, and when the priest announced that the groom could kiss the bride, Cassian’s kiss was far from the usual proper and reserved kissing at weddings. His army friends had whistled and Nesta had hit him in the shoulder, blushing furiously.

They exited the church with the guests throwing petals at them, gladly collapsing inside the carriage.

“I will find flowers on me until next week, I swear” Cassian said, taking one out of his sleeve and having no idea how it had gotten there “I am so tired. I did not know weddings could be so tiring. I cannot wait until we get home and can rest.”

“Oh, but there is still the reception.” he added “Do you think they will be there for too long or can we kick them out of our house when we feel like it?”

“Our house?” Nesta said, and Cassian started fidgeting, afraid he had said something wrong.

“I mean, I know Archeron Manor is yours and we will live in Pemberley— or maybe we can buy a new house here in the city. I figured we would live in Pemberley because we both enjoy the countryside but maybe you would rather live here because of your friends or will not feel comfortable there and would rather live in your childhood home—”

Cassian kept nervously rambling, but Nesta had stopped listening at the words “our house” and “home”. She had never really thought of Archeron Manor as a home, not thought about it with affection. The manor had been a cold and loveless place, and Nesta realised how alone she felt once her sisters had left, taking the small love and light the old place had held away with them. But the thought of living with Cassian, of having a place to call home and fill it with love… she enjoyed this idea.

“Stop talking,” Nesta said, shutting him up with a kiss. “I can live anywhere as long as you are there with me. We can keep the Archeron Manor as our city house. Or we can use your apartment if you want to and sell the Manor if my sisters do not want it either. And I would love to live at Pemberley with you. I adore that place and your staff.”

“Feel free to shut me up like that all the time, Nes” Cassian said with a dazzling smile.

“I can sell my apartment and we can use the Manor as our city house. I am very happy you like the idea of living at Pemberley.” he added “My apartment is quite small and I plan to have a big place with you where you can have as many books as you want.”

“After all, you only married me because of my library” that comment had Nesta blushing again.

“You will never forget that, will you?”

“Never,” Cassian vowed, taking off a petal that was stuck in her hair and leaning to kiss her.

They had kissed a few times, but Nesta realised that this kiss for some reason or the other was different from their previous ones.

There were the kisses from Before.

Before they were married. Before they had laid their bare hearts to each other.

But now there were the kisses from After.

After they had gotten married. After they had promised in front of their friends and family that they would not love anyone else but each other.

The kisses from Before had been good. Had made Nesta’s knees weak and made her lose her mind.

But there was something from this kiss, their second — the first being the one at the ceremony — After kiss… something that made it different from the rest.

And she liked this feeling. She liked it very much.

Nesta deepened the kiss, plunging her hands in Cassian’s hair, making him groan. She wanted to get closer to him, but her huge dress and the limited space in the carriage was not on their side. Yet it seemed Cassian’s mind was following the same train of thought as hers, for he laid her down on the seat, bracing his weight on one forearm to not crush her.

“This dress is stunning” he whispered against her skin as he kissed her neck “But awfully impractical. I cannot wait to pull it off of you”

Nesta felt heat low in her stomach, picturing Cassian slowly undressing her, his touch leaving a scorching path as he went.

“What are you hiding beneath this huge skirt, Nes?” he inquired, his free hand going under the layers of fabric and slowly trailing up her leg.

“Cassian” her mind had emptied out, she could only think about his hand slowly going up and up, reaching her thigh.

“What’s that?” he said, and she felt his finger trailing the garter belt she was wearing “What are you wearing Nes?”

“You know what it is” she managed to say as his finger kept its path, getting dangerously close to her centre.

“Oh I do,” Cassian murmured in her ear, biting her earlobe “But I want you to tell me what it is”

“I— it is not proper to ask what a lady is wearing underneath her clothes” Nesta said, clutching his suit.

“But Nes,” he said with that voice of his that made her want to follow his every word “I am your husband. And that means that not only I can know what you are wearing but I can also see it”

His hand suddenly left her skin, and Nesta wanted to whine in protest. Cassian pulled her up, fixing her hair a little to make it seem like they had not been making out in the twenty minute carriage ride from the church to Archeron Manor.

He opened the carriage, exiting and offering his hand to help her down. Meanwhile all Nesta could do was blink, her mind still fogged with desire.

“Are you coming, Nes? Or will I have to eat the five layer chocolate cake all by myself?”

At the mention of chocolate cake her mind woke up, and she cursed her body for falling so easily for her husband’s charm.

“As if,” she took his hand, their wedding rings shining in the afternoon’s last rays of sun.

Her ring had a ruby of considerable size, with two small dark green stones beside it, whereas Cassian’s had a blue diamond.

“The exact shade of your eyes,” he had said, low enough only for her ears as they exchanged rings “I spent a long time searching for it.”

“And what about my ring?” she had asked, arching an eyebrow.

“Why, it’s my favourite colour surrounded by the colour of my eyes” he had answered, innocently blinking his hazel eyes.

Nesta had rolled her eyes at him but her traitorous smile gave away how much she had liked their rings. Wedding rings commonly marked that the person who wore them had a partner, that they were taken. However, Cassian had taken it a step further, making their rings reflect the other… another claiming of its own.

She had been married for less than a day, yet she was finding out that her husband was more romantic than he let on.

~•~

“Ems, this is scandalous!” Gwyn shouted, her face getting red.

“That is my goal in life,” Emerie said with a snort.

“But… is it bad? Do you think I might have gone overboard?” she added hesitantly, fearing having ruined Nesta’ special day.

“Of course not!!” Gwyn said hastily, easing her friend’s worries “This is the perfect kind of scandalous. You are a trend setter, Emerie. I am sure all the other newlyweds ladies in society will want this design once you officially put it in store.”

“Thank you,” Emerie felt her worries getting lighter at Gwyn’s words. She had designed this lingerie set specially for Nesta, and it was very different from the other pieces of the current time.

“How long are you two going to talk as if I am not here?” Nesta inquired with a raised eyebrow “I feel like a doll being dressed up.”

“Forgive us, your ladyship” Emerie said, doing a mock bow. As it was customary, after the wedding reception had ended Nesta had gone up to the dressing room while Cassian waited in their bedroom. Emerie and Gwyn were the ones who would help her get ready for the wedding night, Feyre and Elain having helped her get ready for the wedding ceremony. She had thought her friends would be less noisy than her sisters had been, but maybe she had put too much faith in them.

“You are all set Nesta” Gwyn declared, making the finishing touch in her hair, which had been arranged in a simpler manner, without all the billion pins to hold the hairstyle.

“I will not walk there wearing only this” Nesta said, indicating the scandalous design “I need something to cover me up. What if Cassian does not like this or what if he finds me lacking in some way, I—”

“Nesta, I would have thought you out of all people would not be nervous” Emerie said with surprise, touching Nesta’s arm “It is clear as day how infatuated with you Cassian is. For Mother's sake, he would never find you lacking in any manner”

“He has a bigger chance of fainting when he sees you than anything. And you will end up needing to call the doctors on your wedding night” Gwyn pointed out, but she took a silk robe out of one box “But if it will help you feel less nervous, Emerie had prepared in advance this silk robe”

“If anything, when you take off the robe the impact will be even bigger” Emerie teased.

“Thank you, for everything” Nesta said, feeling a little stronger now her body was covered up. She had always been a confident woman, yet the idea of someone seeing her in such a vulnerable way made her feel extremely anxious. Suddenly she could not help but wonder if her toned legs from her years practising ballet and ballroom dancing were considerable “sexy”, if her breasts were not weirdly shaped, if the freckles on her shoulders and back were too noticeable or if she should have applied foundation on it to get the spotless skin most ladies at society aimed for.

“You look amazing Nesta” Gwyn assured her “Now go! Poor Cassian has waited a long time to be with his wife after all”

Nesta stood in front of the door connecting her dressing room with the bedroom a few more minutes after Emerie and Gwyn had left through the common door that led to the hallway. Her nerves were coming back, slowly creeping up on her, and she did not know if the knots in her stomach were butterflies or the sudden need to throw up.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the door to find Cassian lazily lying down on a chaise lounge, eyes closed and a glass of what Nesta supposed was scotch on his hand.

“I can’t believe we’re finally alone,” Cassian sighed as Nesta entered their room, closing the door behind her.

She snorted, trying to ease the tension and nervousness she felt.

“Men. They only have one thing on their mind” she hugged her silk robe tighter around herself, cursing Emerie for making her wear that to her wedding night with Cassian.

“What do you mean Nesta?” Cassian asked, setting his glass on the small table near him and sitting up.

“Please, I am not that naive to not know that on their wedding day there is only one thing on every man’s mind” Nesta remarked with a roll of her eyes.

“What?” Cassian frowned, standing up and walking towards her. He was barefoot, having ditched his overcoat, vest and tie, wearing only a white shirt with the first buttons undone, the sleeves rolled up.

Nesta got momentarily distracted by his attire, especially when he stopped in front of her. The last time they had been together unchaperoned had been their night at the theatre, the hurricane of wedding preparations having fallen on both of them again after that. And of course the dinner party that Elain and Lucien had organised at their new house.

It had been a small reunion, just for the new couple to celebrate their wedding among family and close friends. Nesta had arrived a little earlier than the other guests, but she had yet to see Cassian even after an hour since the official starting time. She had been coming back from the powder room when her fianceé had finally decided to appear.

Nesta was turning down the hallway when she collided with a hard surface. She’d have fallen had not said hard surface moved and stopped her.

“Missed me so much you had to throw yourself at me at the first opportunity Nes?” Cassian had teased with a smirk, his arm around her waist holding her tight against his body.

“Keep telling yourself that” she had said, trying to not blush as she felt a rather large bulge through his pants, her dress’ skirts doing nothing to block it given how close to each other they were.

They had kissed more than once, and after that day in her office and their kiss at the library Nesta wanted to scream at her body for still reacting the way it did when it came to Cassian.

Cassian had only shaken his head and righted her, leaving a tender kiss on her cheek.

“Let us return then, my dear. I am sure the other guests at least are missing my shining presence” he had said with a wink, and Nesta only rolled her eyes in fake annoyance as he escorted her back to the party.

“Nesta, look at me” Cassian stopped in front of her, gently grabbing her chin and making her look up.

“You are not wrong to say that I was anxious for our wedding night.” he said “Yes, we have to consummate our marriage and I do know that there are men out there whose only thoughts in their minds at their wedding day is the consummation. But I was also really looking forward to being alone with you because Cauldron, it has been so annoying having chaperones with us all the time when all I want is to talk to you on your own.”

“Oh,” Nesta felt shame for having raised back her ice walls and assuming the worst from Cassian when she knew he was not shallow and rude like most men.

“My dear stubborn wife, now that we are married no one can stop us from being alone because it is not considered inappropriate any longer. And that is what I meant when you walked in.” Cassian flicked her nose, grasping her hand and tugging her towards the chaise lounge “I asked for a bottle of that wine you like to be brought. Unless you would rather drink scotch with me”

“I will take the wine, thank you” Nesta twisted her nose at the idea of drinking scotch. Her alcohol tolerance had grown, and she had tried a couple of new drinks with Gwyn and Emerie since they came back to the city, but she still could not stomach such hard drinks.

Cassian poured her a glass, getting back his glass and clicking it with hers.

“Cassian, can you turn away for a moment?” Nesta asked, the wine giving her the final push she needed to take a leap of faith.

He promptly turned away “Whatever my wife wishes for shall be done”

“No peeking!” Nesta warned, and she could hear Cassian mumbling something beneath his breath, but he stayed put and did not look.

She tossed off the rest of her wine, unting her robe and letting it fall to the floor.

“You can look now” her voice was barely louder than a whisper, but Cassian heard it nonetheless. He turned around, choking on the scotch he was drinking and almost letting the glass slip from his hands. He put it beside her now empty wine glass, his eyes not leaving her for even a second.

“Please say something” Nesta was a minute away from snatching her robe back and hiding under the covers.

“I—” Cassian ran a hand through his hair “I am afraid I lack words to describe just how absolutely stunning you look”

Placing his hands on her waist and tugging her close, Cassian took his sweet time looking at her. Nesta wore an almost transparent lace bralette in white that left little to imagination, supported by three strings that highlighted her generous cleavage. The bralette had a short strap that connected to a transparent lace short skirt, which partially hid the rest of the matching set.

“I suppose I have Emerie to thank for the incredible attire my wife is wearing,” he said in a reverent voice, his thumbs drawing lazy patterns on her waist.

“I am glad it reached your expectations,” she tried to appear unbothered, yet his reaction filled her with satisfaction.

“Nesta darling, you could never disappoint me” he promised, brushing his thumbs on the bare skin of her waist “If anything you always manage to surprise and leave me speechless”

“My goal in life” she replied, her fingers playing with his shirt’s buttons “But I wish you would not call me darling”

“Why?” he asked with curiosity.

“Because that is what Rhysand always call Feyre when they are being sickly affectionate in public” she twisted her nose in disgust.

“What endearments am I allowed then?” he inquired.

“Well let me think,'' Nesta unbuttoned one of his buttons “Nes, for everyday” pop, another button “My sweetheart for Sunday’s” pop pop, two more buttons off “And Goddess divine. But only on very special occasions” pop, there went the last button.

“And what shall I call you when I am cross?” Cassian barely moved as Nesta slowly trailed her fingertips over his very very defined abdomen.

“Can you really stay cross at me?” she asked, and Cassian took a sharp intake of breath when her fingers got dangerously low.

“Touchè,” trying to get back the upper hand on the situation, he moved his hands higher, now skimming the underside of her lace covered breasts “What shall you call me when you are cross? For we know that I excel in getting a raise out of you”

“That is true,” Nesta said with a small smile “What about... Mr.Archeron?”

“No,” Cassian replied, moving one hand to tuck a stray hair behind her ear “No”

Being born as a low commoner from a single seamstress, Cassian did not have a surname until he had been adopted by Rhysand’s parents and given their surname: Bardylis. An old surname, from an old family with old riches and plenty of history. Cassian had been grateful for being given a warm bed, more food than he could possibly eat and a surname that allowed him privileges such as an education and recognition in high society. But even though he loved his brother, his sister and adoptive mother, he had never felt like a true Bardylis, like part of the family. Never felt that sense of belonging.

Yet with Nesta he felt that. Felt that he belonged. Felt like building a family with her. And he would like to have something that would identify him as hers that went even beyond their wedding rings.

So when they got married Cassian had taken Nesta’s surname and became Cassian Archeron. Nesta would still be head of the house and manage the family business, but now she did not have to do it alone. Now she would have Cassian to lean on when things got difficult.

“You may only call me Mr. Archeron when you are completely and perfectly and incandescently happy” he said, his eyes so full of adoration that Nesta could not imagine being happier than she was in that moment.

“Well then,” she got on her tiptoes, her hands moving to cup his face “how are you this fine evening… Mr. Archeron?”

Cassian smiled, and Nesta repeated her last words, kissing his chin “Mr. Archeron”

“Mr. Archeron” she said again, kissing his nose, and she could feel Cassian tightening his hold on her, supporting her.

“Mr. Archeron” a kiss on the corner of his lips “Mr. Archeron” she finally kissed his lips and Cassinan was thankful he would be the only man in Nesta’s life for she had gotten awfully good at kissing in such a short time. Nesta was gifted in a lot of areas, and if she did not know how to do something she would practise until she excelled at it. And Cassian was indeed very pleased with himself that he was the subject of her practice.

Nesta nipped his bottom lip, making Cassian groan. She was getting too good at kissing.

Her hands left his face, returning to their wandering over his body, going to his shoulders and pushing his shirt off. Cassian briefly let go of her to help discard his shirt — which ended up on the floor near her robe — but his lips soon found hers again, unable to leave her for too long. The atmosphere changed, all those months of longing and the past few weeks of waiting crashing down over them at the same time, the desire and passion they held for each other out in the open. And this time no one was there to stop them. There was no need to bear in mind the proper etiquette they should have, for they were married at last.

Cassian’s hands went to the back of Nesta’s thighs, and this time he did not have to tell her what to do. As if it was second nature, her legs wrapped around his waist and he carried her over to the bed, the gentle way in which he laid her so at odds with their passionate kissing. Nesta moaned when she felt all of Cassian against all of her, being able to feel how hard he was. She moved her hands to his pants, wanting him to get rid of them, but Cassian had other plans.

“Eager aren’t we?” he chuckled, grabbing her hands in one of his and pinning them above her head, his grip firm but not so tight that she could not shake him off if she wanted to.

“I have had a very long time to think of what to do with you, Nes” he added in a murmur, grazing his nose over her neck “I am a very generous lover, and I plan to take my sweet time pleasuring you”

“So I need you to be a good girl and behave. Can you do that for me?” Cassian asked, kissing that spot behind her ear that drove her mad. His words made Nesta hot all over, and she felt herself relaxing, obeying him.

“Such a good wife that I have” he let go of her hands, slowly moving down her body. He unhooked the strap that held the skirt, discarding it on the floor. Cassian spread her legs apart, softly kissing her inner thigh “While I was waiting for you I found a very interesting book on your bedside drawer. Who would have guessed that Nesta Archeron read such dirty books”

Nesta mentally kicked herself for forgetting to lock her drawer, the last minute wedding preparations making her careless. They would be staying just one day at the city before departing for Pemberely, so Nesta had felt like it was not necessary to prepare the main suite — which had been her parents and had been locked gathering dust since her father’s passing — when her room had a bed big enough for both of them. She was now regretting her choice.

“You looked through my things?” she hissed, both angry and embarrassed.

“I was getting bored,” he shrugged “I wondered if you had any books left unpacked to help me pass the time”

Cassian had read barely five chapters before closing the book. Picturing Nesta as the female lead while reading the smutty scenes was definitely not helping him control himself, and he had opened the scotch bottle in hopes that the alcohol would calm him down a bit before she arrived in the room.

“We should do a book club,” if that book had been good for anything is that it had given Cassian an idea of what kind of things Nesta might be interested in “I could help you recreate some of your favourite scenes”

“Shut up Cassian, I am divorcing you” Nesta snarled, although the thought of Cassian doing to her the same things that the male characters in her books did to the female leads made her toes curl.

“You will not be saying that once I am done with you” he pulled her flimsy undergarments down, throwing it aside and burying his mouth between her legs. The first flick of his tongue against her clit had Nesta moaning, hands grabbing his hair.

Her imagination and her own hand could not do justice to what Cassian was making her feel. He kept his promise, taking his time with her. He ran his tongue downward in an unhurried sweep, and when he slid his tongue straight into her core Nesta pulled on his hair, the action only making him double his efforts in pleasing her. He grabbed her thighs, placing them on his shoulders so his tongue could reach even deeper, curling into her.

Nesta whimpered, and she did not know if she was pulling his hair to bring him closer or push him away. All she knew was that she felt hot all over, her body tingling with pleasure.

“Do you like this?” Cassian sucked her swollen nub, teeth nipping “Tell me what you like Nes” he flicked his tongue again and again there.

“I— Cassian don’t stop” she moaned, her body grasping for that mind blowing release that drifted closer and closer with his actions.

“Would not dream of it,” he said against her, pushing a finger inside her.

Nesta cried out, the sensation different from when she used her own fingers. Cassian kept pumping his finger in and out of her while his tongue went back to teasing the spot at the apex of her legs.

More more more, that was all Nesta could think about, her mind going blank and her body acting on its own. She was so lost in pleasure that she could not muster enough shame to feel embarrassed by the way her hips ondulated against him, driving his finger deeper.

“I wanted to take things slow Nesta,” Cassian sighed, withdrawing his finger and making Nesta cry out in protest “but you are making it very hard to hold myself back”

“But if my dear wife wants more….” he plunged back in with two fingers, and Nesta gasped, the stretch bordering the thin line between pain and pleasure “then she shall get it”

She truly let go then, not caring if she was too loud and someone heard her. She rode his hand, his face, grinding into him, all while Cassian tasted and savoured her, those fingers of his — thicker and bigger than hers, reaching places she could not and driving her mad with pleasure — stretching and filling her.

“Cassian— I am so close” Nesta pleaded, and he doubled his efforts, fingers pumping and pumping, tongue and lips moving against her, as if he was a starved man and only Nesta could satiate his appetite.

“Let go Nes,” his teeth grazed against her “I got you sweetheart, I want you to come on my tongue, let go”

His words were what made her finally go over the edge of her pleasure, back bowing off the bed with the force of her orgasm. Cassian did not stop until she had collapsed against the mattress, her body limp and reeling, her breath coming out in gasps. He removed his mouth and tongue from between her legs, sliding his fingers out of her and leaving her aching and empty.

“You are exquisite,” he brought his fingers to his mouth, groaning as he sucked them clean. The action made Nesta’s body grow hot all over again, heart pounding.

Cassian peppered her skin with kisses, slowly making his way up.

“Do you still want to divorce me, my love?” he asked, grazing his nose on her neck, “Or was I better than your books?”

“It was satisfying I suppose” she tried to appear unaffected, to call forth her unbothered mask, but her racing heart and breathless voice betrayed her.

“Satisfying,” Cassian laughed against her skin, his hands moving to cup her breasts “I better turn that satisfying into something better, don’t you agree Nes?”

“I would like to see you try” she said, raising her back so he could take off her bralette.

“Cannot wait to see you begging” he whispered, his hands slowly making their way to her back to undo the clasp.

“I do not beg,” Nesta said, the picture of an imperious queen even while laying down.

“That is something that shall be changed then,” Cassian remarked, letting the last piece of his wife’s clothing finally join the floor with the rest.

And Cassian almost came in his pants right there. To finally see Nesta naked… It was a vision he did not know if he would ever recover from.

“My goddess divine…” he said reverently, his hands slowly caressing her breasts “you have no idea what you do to me Nesta”

“I beg to differ, if the way you have glanced at my gown’s neckline in multiple occasions is any indication” she let out a soft whimper as Cassian palmed her breasts with a little more strength “You are not as subtle as you think you are, husband”

“You cannot blame me for ogling you, sweetheart. And I plan to ogle you plenty now that you are my wife”

Whatever comeback Nesta had planned died on the tip of her tongue the moment he closed his mouth around one perked nipple, his other hand busying itself massaging her other breast.

He took his time worshipping her, switching between her breasts to demonstrate how much they drove him mad with want. He sucked her nippples, runned his tongue around it, twisting and pinching them until she finally cracked and begged.

“Cassian please please” she pleaded, her second climax building fast.

“Be a good girl and give me one more, Nes” he said, his teeth gently biting her nipple, his other hand having moved down her body, expertly rubbing those tantalising circles in her clit again.

She came with a cry, throwing her head back. Cassian could feel her heart racing and he left a tender kiss in her breasts before looking at her flushed face.

“So much for not begging,” he teased, and Nesta glared at him.

“Divorce is still on the table, General” she gave him a sly smile “Did I say that your performance was above satisfying?”

“Cruel Archeron, you wound me. Do you need another demonstration?” Cassian tugged at her earlobe “I can taste you all night if that is what you want”

“I think it is now my turn,” Nesta said, surprising him “It seems unfair that you are still clothed while I’m laid bare before you”

Her hands moved to his breeches and Cassian stopped breathing. Her deft fingers unbuttoned them, and she raised an eyebrow at him.

“Let it not be said that I denied my wife anything on her wedding night” he said, getting up and discarding his breeches.

Nesta was sure her eyes must have been double their size as she looked at Cassian.

She had never seen a cock before, had only her imagination and what she had heard maids whispering when they thought she was not paying attention. Nesta was sure that they were not supposed to be that big, despite the fact that she had felt it through her dresses twice now when Cassian had stopped her from falling. Had grinded against it that day in her office.

But nothing could have prepared her for seeing it without his clothes confining it.

He was enormous. Hard and absolutely enormous. She did not know if he would fit at all inside her and she supposed that should scare her. Yet she felt herself getting wetter.

“Enjoying the view Nes?”

She sure was, but she was not going to give him ammunition to his already big ego.

“Lay down,” he did as she instructed, the picture of perfect arrogance as he settled down among the pillows.

She would take that smirk off of his face soon enough.

Settling between his legs, Nesta trailed her finger down the v of his hips, her eyes settling on a small stopwatch on his thigh, near his groin.

“What is this?” She asked curiously, her finger circling it.

“It is a tattoo. I got it after my first battle,” his voice was quiet, remembering darker times “It is a reminder not to waste time.”

“Do you have any others?” Nesta hoped her question took his mind out of painful memories.

“Wings” she arched an eyebrow at that “on my back.”

Nesta realised she had never seen Cassian’s bare back. She had seen his broad chest countless times, but not his back. She’d have to change that. She wanted to see his other tattoo. She wanted to see all of him.

She wanted to touch all of him.

Because he was hers and she was realising that there were things she did not know about him. And she wanted to know them all.

Her finger left the tattoo, moving to his thick, long shaft, and she marvelled at the feel of it. The skin was soft — something she thought was so at odds with how hard he was beneath. She wrapped her hand around his cock, fingers barely able to reach around him completely.

“How do you like it, husband?” she gently squeezed him, her touch feather soft “Gentle?”

He gritted his teeth, willing his body to stop acting like he was a greenboy being touched for the first time.

“Hard?” she stroked him again, her grip slightly harder.

Cassian was fucked. He was utterly and completely ruined as Nesta kept stroking him. His brain had turned into a puddle of melted words, beyond forming coherent sentences. And she had only touched him.

Remembering what she read in one of the books Emerie and Gwyn had gifted her, Nesta pumped him a third time, squeezing hard and letting her nails graze the sensitive underside of his shaft.

Cassian let out a curse, hips arching into her hand.

She chuckled, doing it harder still, twisting her fist as she reached the round head, her thumb brushing the slit at the top.

“Like that? You like that, don’t you?” she repeated the action, spreading his pre cum “What is wrong General? Cat got your tongue?”

“Yeah, just like that” Cassian clenched his jaw, breathing heavily.

Seeing Cassian at her mercy — for once the one so uncomposed — did things to her. Nesta felt powerful, bold, her initial shyness and insecurities having faded as if they never existed.

And it was that new found boldness that made her take him in her mouth.

“Fuck,” cursing under his breath, he leaned his head back, dark hair a stark contrast against the white sheets.

Nesta had him in her mouth for maybe a minute before she was pulled up, Cassian rolling them so he was on top, crushing their lips.

“Was it not good?” She asked, arching her neck as he showered her with kisses.

“It was too good” he looked deep in her eyes, pupils so dilated that the brown had overtaken the green, dark with desire “So good I risked coming in your mouth”

“I would not have minded,” Nesta said, feeling Cassian getting even harder.

“Do you see what you do to me?” He groaned, letting his cock slip between her folds “I am so hard, so fucking hard for my beautiful wife,”

“But, as pleasurable as it was, I would rather leave it for another time. Today is about you and you only” he kissed that tender spot behind her ear “I am but a humble servant whose sole purpose is to love and serve you”

“Look who is suddenly a poet,” Nesta said.

“You are a very inspiring woman. My Nesta. My wife. My goddess divine ” Cassian kissed her deeply, but his voice took a serious tone.

“I cherish you more than I can ever put into words. So if you do not feel comfortable I need you to tell me now and I will stop. We can wait how long you need, there is no problem at all.”

Nesta found Cassian’s concern over her well-being both endaring and frustrating. On one hand, she was glad she had married someone as honourable and gentlemanly as him, after her distasteful experience with Tomas. On the other hand, after everything they had done - how much he had made her blood sing and her body light up on fire - she could not believe he was really considering stopping now. It was something unimaginable to Nesta.

“I want this. I want you, Cassian.” Nesta raised a hand, tenderly cupping his cheek “Do not ask me to wait any longer for you to make me yours in every way possible.”

“Are you sure you want this or are you just saying that because you have seen my library?” he said with a smirk, playfully nipping at her hand.

This cannot be happening, Cauldron I married a clown, Nesta thought to herself.

“Yes, Cassian” she snapped “I want you to fuck me because of your splendidly library. Now can you get on with it or do you want me kick you out of my bedroom”

Cassian had never heard Nesta cursing, never heard her using any kind of crude words at all, so her words came as a great shock to him. That strangely turned him on.

And made him decide to make sure that Nesta was very vocal about what she wanted from him from this point onwards.

“As my wife desires” he said, lining himself at her entrance and slowly sliding in. He did not want to hurt her, this was her first time and he would damn sure make it as mind blowing and perfect as the scenes in her books.

He eased himself in just an inch, halting at her sharp intake of breath. Cassian knew he was large enough that the stretching was edged in sweetest pain.

“Nes, look at me” he breathed and when she did he let all the love he felt for her show in his eyes.

Intertwining their hands, Cassian let himself slide another inch, retreating nearly to her edge. He pushed back in, a little farther this time. His eyes did not stray from hers for a single moment, holding her gaze through each small trust, each retreat, until he was resting against her maidenhead.

And when he plunged forward — and he could not believe just how good it felt to be buried completely within her — his mouth took hers, slowing her small gasp of surprise.

“Are you okay, my love?” Cassian asked, not moving to let her grow used to the feeling of him inside her.

“Yes, I—” she moaned when he moved to adjust his arms, holding himself above her so as to not crush her “Please, do not stop. Keep moving.”

And being the obedient husband that he was, Cassian did not, indeed, stop.

He set the pace, smooth and deep, Nesta utter perfection beneath him, her hips rising to meet his, tentatively at first, then with a vigour that matched her rising passion. Her breaths were coming faster and faster, and each moan and gasp inflamed his passion even more. Cassian wanted to possess her, to own her, to hold her beneath him and never let go.

“Fuck,” he moaned, and she tightned around him, her inner muscles squeezing him harder.

“Fuck, Nesta,” he repeated, scrapping his teeth over her neck.

“Do you see what you do to me? How you make me lose my self control?” he shifted, and his cock plunged even deeper, rubbing against a spot that made that fire inside her ignite even stronger.

“Cassian,” she moaned, wrapping her legs around him.

“Do I feel good to you?” his hand drifted between her legs “Do you like how I fuck you, Nes? Do you need me as much as I need you?”

All she could do was whimper in confirmation, far too gone for words.

“You take me so well, sweetheart. Every inch, just like that”

“Cassian, please” Nesta pleaded “I need… I am going to…”

The rest of her words were lost when his free hand moved to pinch one of her nipples.

“I love when you beg for me. Strong, powerful and beautiful Nesta Archeron, begging so sweetly for me” he moved to her other breast, nipping and sucking at the skin “You want to come one more time my love? Do you want to come all over my cock?”

“Yes,” Nesta sobbed, clenching around him.

“So come for me, Nes” he pinched her clit, and Nesta came with a scream, her orgasm travelling down her body in electric waves.

“Good girl,” Cassian kept trusting, drawing out her release until he wrung every last drop of pleasure. And only then did he come with a loud groan.

They stayed there for a while, panting and blissed out. When their breaths finally slowed, Cassian eased off her, and Nesta whimpered at the sudden emptiness.

“I will be right back Nes,” he said, leaving a kiss on her temple.

He returned moments later with a damp cloth, which he used to gently clean her up, mindful of how sensitive she was. Nesta somehow managed to get under the cover, holding it up for Cassian, who was quick to join her, tucking her to his side.

“I shall not divorce you,” she murmured sleepy, nuzzling into his chest “Congratulations on having avoided it, for now.”

“Thank you for your kindness, sweetheart,” Cassian gave a weak laugh, running his hand through her hair in soothing motions.

Soon, they were both asleep, happy and at home in each other’s arms.

~•~

Three Years Later

“My Lady, you really ought to get down. I can get the book for you”

“Mrs.Potts, rest assured that I am capable of climbing a few steps to get the book myself” Nesta replied, getting on her tiptoes and reaching for the book “Besides, I already told you to relax and enjoy your vacation. You really do not need to nanny me”

Nesta smartly let out the fact that even though it did not show, Mrs.Potts was getting old. Her climbing a narrow stair to grab a book on the highest shelf would also not be advised.

“But my Lady, the Lord said—”

“We both know that my husband is a mother hen” Nesta rolled her eyes, finally reaching the book and tucking it under her arm so she could climb down the stairs “Besides, he is busy at headquarters so if we do not tell he will never know.”

“I will never know what?” a deep voice filled with amusement said.

“My Lord! You are back!” Mrs. Potts exclaimed, motioning to Nesta to hurry up and climb the rest of the stairs down.

“Yes, I could not possibly miss afternoon tea with my wife,” Cassian said, arching an eyebrow as Nesta descended the last steps, walking in his direction “And what do you think you were doing?”

“I was getting a book, Cassian” Nesta replied, shrugging “Mrs.Potts can testify that I was perfectly safe and sound doing it.”

“Can she now?” he inquired, and the old head maid begrudgingly nodded in affirmation.

“If you will excuse me, I shall retire to my quarters and rest for a bit” Mrs.Potts gave a pointed glance in Nesta’s direction “As her ladyship said, I am on vacation”

Mrs. Potts left the room muttering that now she had two strong headed employers who could not listen to reason, much to the employers’ amusement.

“We should increase her salary,” Cassian said, his arms going around Nesta’s waist and hugging her close to him “Soon there will be another person to drive the poor woman mad.”

“Which is why you should be resting, as I have been telling you to do,” he added.

“Cassian, I am three months pregnant, not nine” she rolled her eyes again “I do not need rest. What I do need is a husband who lets me climb stairs to get books”

“I can get any books you want, Nes” Cassian kissed her, making Nesta melt on his arms “I am just a bit worried about my girls, sorry if I am being too overbearing.”

“Girls?” she asked with confusion.

“You and our little princess of course,” he placed one hand on her abdomen “I think that she is going to be just as fierce and incredible as her mom.”

“How can you be so sure that she is a girl?” Nesta laughed at his conviction that their child would be a girl.

“I just know it,” he shrugged, “I have a strong gut feeling.”

“As you wish then, Mr.Archeron,” she said with a smile “Now, I believe I heard someone saying something about afternoon tea?”

“With all of your favourite pastries,” he declared with pride, kissing her again.

“Oh, you truly are the best husband, General Archeron” Nesta squealed when he suddenly gathered her in his arms princess style, exiting the library and walking towards the outdoor patio. It was a lovely day for a picnic.

“I can walk! Cassian!”

“See how your mom likes to boss me around and argue?” he ignored Nesta, directing his words to his unborn child “Will you do the same when you are born I wonder?”

And six months later Cassian got his answer when a healthy little girl with light brown skin, curly dark hair and her mom’s eyes was born. Little Cynane indeed had Cassian wrapped around her little fingers, her father not missing a single afternoon tea with his daughter and all of her dolls.

•

Tag list: : @sayosdreams @thewayshedreamed @perseusannabeth @arinbelle @caotica-e-quieta @vidalinav @swankii-art-teacher @ireallyshouldsleeprn @duskandstarlight @d0riansgray @thegoddessaltenia @dayanna-hatter @verypaleninja @awesomelena555 @courtofjurdan @valkyriewarriors @moe8 @illyrianwitchling13 @silvernesta @bri-loves-sunflowers @queenestarcheron @imwritingthesewords @vasudharaghavan @rainbowcheetah512 @darkshadowqueensrule @letstakethedawn​ @starlightorstarfire @city-of-fae @thalia-2-rose @nestaarcher0n @rowaelinismyotp @julemmaes @dontgetsalmonella @janeslandrys @lysakirova @inardour @fatimafares123 @angelina-figjam @castielspelvis @imagine-me @18moneytoad @booksstorm @loosingdreams @live-the-fangirl-life @moodymelanist @sv0430 @oversizedbats @simpingfornestaarcheron @angelic-voice-1997 @katekatpattywack @starksravings

{Please let me know if you’d like to be added to my Fixed Tag list. Bold tags don’t work}

Reblogs are always welcomed!!

#nessian #nesta x cassian #cassian x nesta #nesta archeron #cassian #pride and prejudice au #sarah j maas #sjmaas #sjm fanfic

[thedanceronthestreets]

Just saw this post on my dash and wanted to comment on this keeley bit cause i've seen this argument made a few times now and i just feel like i wanna add my own carrots to the soup:

Am i pissed off that people keep forgetting keeley's queer? Absofrigginlutely. Am i pissed off that a character can't casually mention her attraction to women and be taken seriously for it? You BETCHA. But the sad truth is that if i asked my family whether they thought keeley was bisexual and showed them the evidence they'd all go 'it's just a joke'. Which, yeah, is homophobic (rural queer rite of passage 😌) and sucks balls. But to me it proves the point that in mainstream media, we've just not reached the point yet where keeley's off-hand comments about her sexuality are enough to make an audience question its own homophobic bias. And i think it's easy to forget that in our tumblr bubble, as op mentioned in their above post, all of these takes and accusations around whether someone is acting homophobic or not (this applies to tedtrent shippers accusing tedbeccas of homophobia as well, though i've only seen that on twitter so far) are so far removed from the ACTUAL homophobic takes that are prevalent in the larger fandom of white conservative christians who think ted lasso is about how to have a positive attitude towards capitalism. Queer people saying 'i wish the ted lasso writers took keeley's sexuality more seriously' are not the enemy, just as much as queer people saying 'let keeley be silly and goofy about liking women' aren't. It's casual audiences who are so oblivious to any sort of queer insinuation that even if keeley were to kiss rebecca on the mouth, they'd probably call them very good friends. And while i think it's flipping fantastic to see keeley be unashamedly bi while being in a relationship with roy (well yknow, hopefully again soon), wanting something more explicit on tv that will cause obvious discomfort in the very specific homophobic audience niche of sports fans and karens is perfectly valid. AND IT DOESN'T MATTER WHICH CHARACTERS WOULD ENGAGE IN SUCH A PLOTLINE. I think many people flocked to tedtrent because people started laying out (very sparse) arguments within season 1 and 2 that could be read in a queer way and now that not only ted is a main character but also trent a title character the ship was bound to gain more popularity as that's just how these things work. But if in the end tedbeard turned out to be canon i would eat my own arm (out of positive emotion and delight). If colin and isaac turned out to be a couple i might worry that the storyline lasts for 1 episode and nothing more due to the size of their roles, but ultimately i'd sob at the tv and wouldn't shut up about them ever again. It really doesn't matter WHO challenges the general audience as long as it happens. And as much as i love keeley, her comments so far haven't managed to trigger that sort of uproar in the audience that would kick off an avalanche of arguments around queer characters and their space in media (and i wanna specify again that this refers to the general audience, not the queer tumblr-residing one that has obviously had this discussion around keeley). Anyway ted lasso writers, let keeley and jodi balfour's character get nasty on screen please 🫶

(Also, i keep seeing posts insinuating that the tedtrent fandom has turned awful and i'd be much obliged if someone could enlighten me on that front as i don't know whether i'm just entirely oblivious in my own bubble of people but whenever i check the tedtrent tag all i see is gifs, theories for the upcoming episodes or people going 'haha i know i have shit brain fungus but what if')

#and that's how sue Cs it #keeley jones #ted lasso #tedtrent #ted lasso spoilers

[acrosstobear]

I feel you've moved away from Mick slightly in the last few weeks. I also thought your comment about Laila being on a free trip to Japan was a bit cutting. Obviously they both want to spend time with one another. Lsila also has her own money and has acquired quite an amount of money too. Maybe I'm wrong but you're normally one of the first to post or tag Mick

hi best bud!!! thank you for giving me an opportunity to chat a little about where i'm at in my head and in my heart and honestly in my life in general. so for the last two race weekends i have been on a tropical vacation literally 8000 km away from my home with my best buds 🥰 girls trip!!! and on previous vacations i've tried to keep the posting going but honestly this time around it just felt super difficult and i really needed to disconnect cause i've got a lot going on in my life rn (under a read more not to bore you all)

tl;dr is that i still absolutely adore Mick, but the uncertainty over where he's going to end up is really tough for me to be dealing with on top of everything else in my life. i'm working through it!!!! for the last 6 races, they are also generally WAY easier for me to keep up with for posting cause they are in my timezone :) so you will see me back on your dash posting rather than reblogging real soon!!!!

really appreciate your concern and love buddy <3

1) my mom is going through chemo for stage 4 cancer and while i was away, ended up in the hospital for a fractured vertebrae, which is super stressful cause its just me and my dad around to help her and they were worried it was possible that the cancer had spread to her bones and etc etc etc. all good in the end and they have her on a pain management plan while it heals and finally gets to the end of her chemo plan (she can't get any further treatment until chemo is done) but obv that's been weighing on me really really heavily. i did most of my grieving earlier this year and have honestly been handling it pretty well since then, though there are weeks more overwhelming than others, but yeah, it sucks very very much.

2) remember boy that i was seeing who got deported? we've been doing really well keeping in touch with calls and texts and even all through my vacation he was sending me good morning texts, little check ins throughout the day, etc. until near the end he found out that his company was no longer going to sponsor his visa 🫠 and full credit to him, he was super upfront about it right away and we agreed we would deal with it when i got back and well. i got back. and we agreed that until he can know that canada is actually a real possibility, its best if we end things here ☹️ so yeah basically got the "it's not you, it's me" from him but i do agree that if he doesnt plan to be in canada im not doing short term long distance if there isn't going to be an end in sight.

3) there is soooooo much uncertainty surrounding both Mick & Callum right now and where they're going to be next year and that has been majorly stressing me out if i'm honest. like i had to totally disassociate from the whole social media fiasco Callum got pulled into cause im sincerely so worried we won't see him on the grid next year, that would actually possibly kill me. and similarly, Mick is being rumoured for WEC seats and the F1 door is closing and like. i can't do WEC. it's not that i don't love it, but i've been there for Callum and had a tough enough time just being able to find a place to watch them, nevermind that 8h-24h races are just not sustainable for me unless i drop another sport that i love. and quite honestly, i don't love that Mick has made most of his public persona his relationship right now. when was the last time he posted about racing? i LOVE a hard launch, it truly brought him back into the mainstream in terms of conversation, but then he didn't really capitalize on it to even do a throwback or even a post himself about Mick's Kart Race that DVB organized or a fucking training post. i totally understand where you're coming from in that they want to spend their time together as much as possible and like, alright go to japan amazing!!!! i just wish that we were SEEING more than her. momentum in this kind of job market is so easily influenced by perception, and right now my perception of Mick is that he has a girlfriend and no job prospects. ALL THAT TO SAY. i adore Mickolas. that will never ever change. i want to support him wherever he ends up. i've been there for Callum and done it before and i will absolutely do it again for Mick.

4) balancing having a life and work and friends and love, which was new for me, is fucking hard to do if you also want to post and write and edit and gif and watch racing. i'm having a tough time figuring it out. i've been grieving over the last month quite honestly, cause i love this community and i adore what i've built here and i still LOVE racing and sharing that love and passion with you guys. it's just really hard to figure out how to do without sacrificing things that mean more / have a higher priority in my life right now. but i'm missing it!!!!!!!!! so much. i wanna get back to gif'ing and posting and writing, truly.

#amanda answers #anon #life update i guess #boy update buried in there as well lmao #love you friend i do

[joannerowling]

How do you think the Johnny Depp situation got so toxic so quickly? Is it just because he’s so famous? I do think the anti metoo crowd saw Depp as a good person to use to discredit the metoo movement and used him accordingly considering how famous he is.

I mean I remember the level of hatred he got in 2016-18 then it just changed so dramatically during the trial with seemingly so little effort. It felt so suspicious to me. I went from being pretty indifferent to feeling genuinely quite sorry for Amber. She was treated awfully and I have never really been a fan of hers. I wonder if he employed bots to help start a conversation in his favour considering it really seemed like he had very little positive media coverage before the trial. Although there were plenty of real people on his side on TikTok and Twitter etc.

I just wish he was never cast as Grindelwald. Jo and the crew got so much hate for keeping him as Grindelwald for CoG after allegations then got so much backlash for getting rid of him after a judge literally deemed him guilty. I do think it really damaged the fantastic Beasts films. I have a feeling it would have received a little more goodwill if another actor played Grindelwald from the beginning. Plus as a Grindeldore fan I really didn’t like him as Grindelwald at all and I’m genuinely sad now that anyone who plays Grindelwald will be tainted by the Depp fans who’ll always act like the character belongs to Johnny. No Grindelwald belongs to Jo!

Prefacing this with: i'm not really the best to ask about the Depp/Heard case, or actors in general tbh. I'm not the most knowledgeable and found the whole circus around the trial grotesque.

That being said, how did the situation get so toxic? First of all, the heavy involvement of Depp's legal team (as well as either well paid or very motivated third parties) in building his "defence" online in the years preceding the trials and weaponising the Internet against Heard. This is well known by now and includes falsifying evidence before leaking it to fans, use of bots to build a momentum, etc. But it doesn't explain how the sauce took so well, does it? Imo and in no particular order:

Social context online. Check out the first comment on this reddit thread i've found about the Netflix documentary that came out about the case recently: "The appeal of getting in deep with the case wasn’t so much to learn about law and defamation, it was the fun of joining in with others as a community and sharing reactions and emotions." Based on this alone you could have told this was never going to be about justice, but the internet equivalent of a rave party in post-Covid times.

Fashion. It was trendy to be pro-Heard, now it's trendy to be pro-Depp. "Don't you know new info came out that she actually was the abusive one all along?? Keep up!" is a much better story to gossip about than "yeah, Depp, that known abuser, we've known since 2016"

Reactionary response to the brief #MeToo era, or as we call it, the classic pendulum of misogyny coming back in full swing.

The extremely ridiculous American legal system allowing for trials to be filmed and justice to be made a spectacle of, under the very thin veil of education and "transparency". The only thing that's transparent here is that the US fucking suck but we knew this.

Neo capitalism. See this article : the real winners of the case are media content creators who "went all in".

I too wish Depp was never cast as Grindelwald, first because he's such an obviously poor choice for the role independently of his behaviour. But WB in general has a problem with casting the worst possibly individuals known to man (or rather women) in lead roles. See fucking Ezra Miller and the Flash disaster. But i think what actually damaged the movies much more than any celebrity business (least of all JKR's own controversy which the general public knows shit about) is that they weren't all that good.

#replies #anon #fb #hp cast

[gendiebrainrotreceipts]

Girl boss culture is so stupid and you radfems are making it worse. You think you’re making women look so bad but it’s just toxic don’t come crying to men when it all backfires. There are many rumours and beliefs about mystical phenomena happening every time Constantinople was attacked. What I did not know is that apparently this is mentioned in Ottoman scripts as well. That’s certainly interesting. In any case, this is folklore at this point and I am not at all sure it is credible. I read there in the comments below the video someone saying that there must have been some sort of high voltage produced in the midst of the battle. Or maybe a lightning stroke the church for all we know. Surely it must have shocked medieval people but I believe there was some natural explanation for it or that in the heat of the moment people certainly made it out to be more otherworldly than it actually was. something abt fate's glamorization of historical figures (including giving them tits) seems so epic at first glance, then u skim thru their wikipedia page and they're like... *lives after the Great Schism of the Catholic and Orthodox church*, "which Council of ____ are we following?", *invaded by an empire that just disbanded 100 years ago*, political marriage and matchmaking is hard, "our city was terribly ransacked after the fourth crusade back in 1204, we can't ask help from the West!", *civil wars in neighboring states probably*, *Istanbul (Not Constantinople) by They might be giants playing in the background*, the Habsburgs family tree is dangerously getting close to being a vine, Margaret of Anjou GiRlbOsSinGggggg her way thru England, maybe another chapter of the Hundred Years War. constantine xi was like existing with by social and political forces of their time. sucks to be him though! imagine being a legit heir of capital R=Rome, only for the austrians to like rebrand themselves as the Holy Roman Empire which according to Voltaire is neither holy, nor Roman nor an Empire while u, the legit remnant of the glory that is Rome is shrinking with forces beyond your control. the city has fallen and you're still alive, you stand singular against the invaders. the glory that was Rome is in you and you'll perish with it. On right there is the antithesis, Dracula, on a background of blood-red. A simple stylized city is shown behind the theatrically dark-clad Dracula, and a many-tailed dragon roars before his feet. In this way he is presented as the saint of death, as the Dragon is a mythical being most closely associated with evil and destruction. In the Biblical book of Revelation, a seven-headed dragon appears in sky, being one of the heralds of the End Times. ‘The Christian dead totalled about four thousand, many more were wounded, and tens of thousands were taken prisoner. Blood flowed in the streets of Constantinople, encircling the cobblestones like red mortar. Some of the bodies were thrown into the Dardanelles, where they "floated out to sea like melons in a canal". Others were piled up as there had been no time to bury them; the stench was terrible, but even more terrible was the task of identifying the bodies of friends and relatives, because many had been beheaded.’

[fairy25]

Girl boss culture is so stupid and you radfems are making it worse. You think you’re making women look so bad but it’s just toxic don’t come crying to men when it all backfires. There are many rumours and beliefs about mystical phenomena happening every time Constantinople was attacked. What I did not know is that apparently this is mentioned in Ottoman scripts as well. That’s certainly interesting. In any case, this is folklore at this point and I am not at all sure it is credible. I read there in the comments below the video someone saying that there must have been some sort of high voltage produced in the midst of the battle. Or maybe a lightning stroke the church for all we know. Surely it must have shocked medieval people but I believe there was some natural explanation for it or that in the heat of the moment people certainly made it out to be more otherworldly than it actually was. something abt fate's glamorization of historical figures (including giving them tits) seems so epic at first glance, then u skim thru their wikipedia page and they're like... *lives after the Great Schism of the Catholic and Orthodox church*, "which Council of ____ are we following?", *invaded by an empire that just disbanded 100 years ago*, political marriage and matchmaking is hard, "our city was terribly ransacked after the fourth crusade back in 1204, we can't ask help from the West!", *civil wars in neighboring states probably*, *Istanbul (Not Constantinople) by They might be giants playing in the background*, the Habsburgs family tree is dangerously getting close to being a vine, Margaret of Anjou GiRlbOsSinGggggg her way thru England, maybe another chapter of the Hundred Years War. constantine xi was like existing with by social and political forces of their time. sucks to be him though! imagine being a legit heir of capital R=Rome, only for the austrians to like rebrand themselves as the Holy Roman Empire which according to Voltaire is neither holy, nor Roman nor an Empire while u, the legit remnant of the glory that is Rome is shrinking with forces beyond your control. the city has fallen and you're still alive, you stand singular against the invaders. the glory that was Rome is in you and you'll perish with it. On right there is the antithesis, Dracula, on a background of blood-red. A simple stylized city is shown behind the theatrically dark-clad Dracula, and a many-tailed dragon roars before his feet. In this way he is presented as the saint of death, as the Dragon is a mythical being most closely associated with evil and destruction. In the Biblical book of Revelation, a seven-headed dragon appears in sky, being one of the heralds of the End Times. ‘The Christian dead totalled about four thousand, many more were wounded, and tens of thousands were taken prisoner. Blood flowed in the streets of Constantinople, encircling the cobblestones like red mortar. Some of the bodies were thrown into the Dardanelles, where they "floated out to sea like melons in a canal". Others were piled up as there had been no time to bury them; the stench was terrible, but even more terrible was the task of identifying the bodies of friends and relatives, because many had been beheaded.’

Bro you lost me at Constantinople, if you want to insult me please just get to the goddamn point

[radicalcoffeeclub]

Girl boss culture is so stupid and you radfems are making it worse. You think you’re making women look so bad but it’s just toxic don’t come crying to men when it all backfires. There are many rumours and beliefs about mystical phenomena happening every time Constantinople was attacked. What I did not know is that apparently this is mentioned in Ottoman scripts as well. That’s certainly interesting. In any case, this is folklore at this point and I am not at all sure it is credible. I read there in the comments below the video someone saying that there must have been some sort of high voltage produced in the midst of the battle. Or maybe a lightning stroke the church for all we know. Surely it must have shocked medieval people but I believe there was some natural explanation for it or that in the heat of the moment people certainly made it out to be more otherworldly than it actually was. something abt fate's glamorization of historical figures (including giving them tits) seems so epic at first glance, then u skim thru their wikipedia page and they're like... *lives after the Great Schism of the Catholic and Orthodox church*, "which Council of ____ are we following?", *invaded by an empire that just disbanded 100 years ago*, political marriage and matchmaking is hard, "our city was terribly ransacked after the fourth crusade back in 1204, we can't ask help from the West!", *civil wars in neighboring states probably*, *Istanbul (Not Constantinople) by They might be giants playing in the background*, the Habsburgs family tree is dangerously getting close to being a vine, Margaret of Anjou GiRlbOsSinGggggg her way thru England, maybe another chapter of the Hundred Years War. constantine xi was like existing with by social and political forces of their time. sucks to be him though! imagine being a legit heir of capital R=Rome, only for the austrians to like rebrand themselves as the Holy Roman Empire which according to Voltaire is neither holy, nor Roman nor an Empire while u, the legit remnant of the glory that is Rome is shrinking with forces beyond your control. the city has fallen and you're still alive, you stand singular against the invaders. the glory that was Rome is in you and you'll perish with it. On right there is the antithesis, Dracula, on a background of blood-red. A simple stylized city is shown behind the theatrically dark-clad Dracula, and a many-tailed dragon roars before his feet. In this way he is presented as the saint of death, as the Dragon is a mythical being most closely associated with evil and destruction. In the Biblical book of Revelation, a seven-headed dragon appears in sky, being one of the heralds of the End Times. ‘The Christian dead totalled about four thousand, many more were wounded, and tens of thousands were taken prisoner. Blood flowed in the streets of Constantinople, encircling the cobblestones like red mortar. Some of the bodies were thrown into the Dardanelles, where they "floated out to sea like melons in a canal". Others were piled up as there had been no time to bury them; the stench was terrible, but even more terrible was the task of identifying the bodies of friends and relatives, because many had been beheaded.’

We need to bring back character limit for asks actually

#okay buddy #i didnt read the half of it but i dont think i need to