#When times were easy

[honeywafflez1art]

"...At least Jesse was clearly enjoying the manor life."

Based on a scene from the Deadlock Rebels book (snippet under cut)⚔️

#Love this for them #When times were easy #But tbh the way the book so casually presents you with the fact that Jesse/Cole was used for child labor #And Ashe's parents have a PRIVATE JET?? #Idk I think there was a lot more to be explored there but we all just accept it ig?? Whatever #overwatch #overwatch 2 #Jesse McCree #Cole Cassidy #Ashe #Elizabeth Caledonia Ashe #B.O.B. #BOB #love bawb #Deadlock gang #Deadlock Rebels

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 198

Now Bruce was not expecting to reincarnate upon his death. At least he thinks he died, he’s pretty sure he did. There wasn’t any other reason for him to be a well, literal baby. Around two he thinks, which fits well with the fact that it’s around that time that babies start forming memory recall, if he, well, remembered correctly. 

But while he knew about reincarnation thanks to Shayera and Carter, he’d never exactly given it much thought towards himself. Because seriously, what were the chances of such a thing as him being given another chance? 

So he was quite surprised at his situation, experimentally opening and closing pudgy hands that looked well, just a tiny bit off. He’d never been that pale before, he thinks, even back when he never went outside like, ever. 

He turned his gaze towards the mobile above him with a sort of idle curiosity- a mixture of bats (ha) and other trinkets he wasn’t familiar with. It also caused him to get his first good look at his parent, asleep on a rocking chair right next to the crib. 

Huh. They had the same pale skin he did, albeit in the light it looked like it was slightly tinted blue, and while their hair was white they didn’t exactly look old. They looked surprisingly well rested for raising a toddler too, unless they had a nanny or something similar… He rolled over, managing to very shakily push himself to his feet with the help of the crib. 

Why was standing so hard as a toddler? And why did he have his memories of everything except how he had died anyway? 

His head whipped up from where they were staring at his feet when he heard a snort, finding his parent awake and standing. Somehow silently enough that he hadn’t noticed- or he was that easily distracted by the unfamiliar giddiness bursting in his chest. 

“Morning little bat,” his parent easily picked him up and held him while he inwardly sighed at the nickname. Of course his bat motif would follow him into this life. A low rumbling almost caused him to jump, his body relaxing before he could fully register the sound. The… purring? 

Oh. 

He wasn’t human this time around. 

#Dcxdp #Dpxdc #Prompts #Vlad is a young-adult dad to a reincarnated Bruce #After the hospital he drowned his despair/distress in any way he could & ended up with a baby boy #Bruce’s main suspected species of what they were was vampire before the ghost reveal lol #Bruce can’t say shit about Vlad’s thievery but he has the most judging expression for a toddler #Then he also sees his new dad develop and try to figure out powers #Vlad was terrified to pick him up when he first discovered his ghost fire #Yes this very much changes Vlad’s relationship with Danny #The reunion has 14 year old Danny meet a Very Smart 8 year old Bruce #Yes Bruce clocks teenage vigilante instantly #And look he Would try to get Vlad to stop the possession shit but as long as it’s actual assholes he can’t exactly judge #He blackmailed SO many people in his past life… he's trying Not to be a hypocrite here #Why yes Bruce IS very liminal from having a half-ghost dad #Vlad panicked more than he did when his fangs came in (Bruce has made a file about both himself & everyone he meets) #Just because he’s now baby doesn’t mean he’s no longer Bruce #At some point someone from his world might find their way to this one but that would be a very long time in the future lol #Vlad (unaware of his core being able to feel his ghostling’s big emotions): Wow raising a child is surprisingly easy

[inkskinned]

i. about 2 weeks ago, i was told there's a good chance that in 5 or so years, i'll need a wheelchair.

ii. okay. i loved harry potter as a kid. i have a hypothesis about this to be honest - why people still kind of like it. it's that she got very lucky. she managed to make a cross-generational hit. it was something shared for both parents and kids. it was right at the start of a huge cultural shift from pre to post-internet. i genuinely think many people were just seeking community; not her writing. it was a nice shorthand to create connection. which is a long way of saying - she didn't build this legacy, we built it for her. she got lucky, just once. that's all.

iii. to be real with you, i still struggle with identifying as someone with a disability, which is wild, especially given the ways my life has changed. i always come up against internalized ableism and shame - convinced even right now that i'm faking it for attention. i passed out in a grocery store recently. i hit my head on the shelves while i went down.

iv. he raises his eyebrows while he sends me a look. her most recent new book has POTS featured in it. okay, i say. i already don't like where this is going. we both take another bite of ramen. it is a trait of the villain, he says. we both roll our eyes about it.

v. so one of the things about being nonbinary but previously super into harry potter is that i super hate jk rowling. but it is also not good for my mental health to regret any form of joy i engaged with as a kid. i can't punish my young self for being so into the books - it was a passion, and it was how i made most of my friends. everyone knew about it. i felt like everyone had my same joy, my same fixation. as a "weird kid", this sense of belonging resonated with me so loudly that i would have done anything to protect it.

vi. as a present, my parents once took me out of school to go see the second movie. it is an incredibly precious memory: my mom straight-up lying about a dentist appointment. us snickering and sneaking into the weekday matinee. within seven years of this experience, the internet would be a necessity to get my homework finished. the world had permanently changed. harry potter was a relic, a way any of us could hold onto something of the analog.

vii. by sheer luck, the year that i started figuring out the whole gender fluid thing was also the first year people started to point out that she might have some internalized biases. i remember tumblr before that; how often her name was treated as godhood. how harry potter was kind of a word synonymous for "nerdy but cool." i would walk out of that year tasting he/him and they/them; she would walk out snarling and snapping about it.

viii. when i teach older kids creative writing, i usually tell them - so, she did change the face of young adult fiction, there's no denying that. she had a lot more opportunities than many of us will - there were more publishing houses, less push for "virally" popular content creators. but beyond reading another book, we need to write more books. we need to uplift the voices of those who remain unrepresented. we need to push for an exposure to the bigotry baked into the publishing system. and i promise you: you can write better than she ever did. nothing she did was what was magical - it was the way that the community responded to it.

ix. i get home from ramen. three other people have screenshotted the POTS thing and sent it to me. can you fucking believe we're still hearing this shit from her when it's almost twenty-fucking-twenty-three. the villain is notably also popular on tumblr. i just think that's funny. this woman is a billionaire and she's mad that she can't control the opinions of some people on a dying blue site that makes no money. lady, and i mean this - get a fucking life.

x. i am sorry to the kid i was. maybe the kid you were too. none of us deserved to see something like this ruined. that thing used to be precious to me. and now - all those good times; measured into dust.

/// 9.6.2022 // FUCKING AGAIN, JK? Are you fucking kidding me?

#witches and wizards #kids need to be able to play games without knowing the extended universe #playing was easy #i knew i wasn't gonna be able to explain chronicles of christomancy #but we could pick up a stick and run around #nd say we were magic that would be enough backstory #and i think the last time i felt that sense of community #was the summer of pokemon go #it's about cross-generational connectivity bro #yes there are insular communtities but EVERYONE had fucking read harry potter #which is me saying - i think maybe people don't miss HER or the ACTUAL BOOK tbh #they miss... feeling connected #think about how so many people felt so weirdly ashamed and lost after Game of Thrones ended - #they did SUCH a bad job that the entire community just... vanished. #where beforehand people would have GoT weddings #we are just animals who love stories and love feeling like we speak the same language #btw i am not on twitter so i hadn't seen some of the shit she was doing #and then when i was 19 she published the ''american school'' hogwarts stuff #and was reading it casually bc again a huge nerd #and in it shes like ''the british taught the natives their more civilized magics'' #and that was like..................... oh okay. okay. so.....

[handsomelyerin]

claudia & lestat + on mothers and daughters

"my infant death. it was never you." bailey bass & sam reid in interview with the vampire (2022) cr. by rolin jones // 1. this post // 2. this post // 3. piss river - kevin morby // 4. a mother's hate - sam gordon // 5. elektra - sophocles // 6. on earth we're briefly gorgeous - ocean vuong // 7. unknown // 8. nayyirah waheed // 9. susan smith - wych elm // 10. unknown // 11. elektra - sophocles // 12. the ghost is dead, long live the ghost - mara avoth // 13. this post // 14. this post // 15. love drought - beyonce // 16. confessions - ijeoma umebinyuo // 17. unknown // 18. mother - john lennon

#like he quite literally brought her into the world #he's her mother #it was giving lady bird meets sharp objects meets some other secret third thing #the fact that they were so alike yet could never read each other's minds #she ached for him to love him unconditionally like louis #and i believe that lestat was genuinely fond of her in those easy times as claudia called them #but once she became too much of a mirror of himself that's when he pulled away #and also bc she was slowly pulling louis away from him #just really a fucked up and tragic dynamic #interview with the vampire #web weaving #lestat de lioncourt #claudia de pointe du lac #amc iwtv #edit: thank you for the notes! #edit: officially complete with the finale #and with sources

[canisalbus]

To me, Machete kind of has the energy of a secondary villain/coldhearted side character in someone else's story that a lot of fans latch onto, moreso than the protagonist. Question is, would he be the villain in anyone's story?

Why, thank you! I'm actually glad to hear he gives off that vibe. I don't think he set out to become a villain but a lot of people certainly view him as one.

#in the 16th century canon he starts out as an introverted but sincerely well meaning guy that never quite manages to find his social niche #he was a sensitive kid and when subjected to enough pressure #his insecurity fearfulness and powerlessness mutate into distrust resentment aggression suffocating repression and self-restraint #I don't think he's a bad person in fact he consistently tries very hard to do the right thing #do his job properly avoid letting people down and get through life with a sense of dignity #but he is supposed to come across kind of cold impersonable and difficult to be around if you don't know him personally (and very few do) #people can sense there's something wrong with him and are put off by it #Vatican is a nest of vipers and as the stakes rise he retreats deeper into his coldblooded untouchable work persona #he has no choice but to start lying scheming blackmailing and eliminating his enemies #in order to maintain his position keep Vasco safe their relationship under wraps and his own head above water #essentially playing by the same rules everyone else in the holy see has been playing with for centuries #eventually he loses his spot as the secretary of state and is manipulated/forced to take on a role in the roman inquisition #and if people were sort of iffy about him before being the authority overseeing trials torture excommunications and executions doesn't help #and since he has so few allies and such an infamous reputation he's an easy target for scapegoating whenever necessary #towards the end it dawns on him that he's become the kind of twisted cruel corrupt person he used to fear and despise #and the guilt moral injury and abject self-loathing had largely sapped him of his will to live by the time the final assassin gets him #answered #anonymous #Machete #Vaschete lore #he thought his dream of priesthood would make him a better person more worthy of admiration safety and love but he climbed too high #and got roped up in the dangerous games that take place under god's nose and slowly got strangled to death

[moeblob]

Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!

I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.

#fe three houses #ferdinand von aegir #discord emotes #i thought long and hard about this bc idk the actual want for emotes i made ages ago but #i still love my son and its his bday ad so i should be nice and share #since i no longer have nitro and can no longer use them myself #the fact i can technically post 30 at once was tempting but #some of them arent living up to my standards and also just might not be easy to use in most contexts #so those im gonna skip on lol #whoever wants 21 aegirglyphics tho have at em #i think i might have posted some before? but only 10 and i dont recall which ones #if you want a secret the last three and the middle on the second row are my favorites to use #i used concernednand (the upper one) so much #the internet concerns me guys it was a valid use every time #debated sharing heartnand but honestly the world could benefit from it imo because gotta spread that love #fun lil trivia i love making emotes and so when i was in a server and people knew me as the ferdinand fan and artist #someone was like why hasnt salmon made a ferdinand emote yet #and im like bc i dont run the server and i cant just demand they add my art #and then a mod was like i didnt wanna put pressure on salmon but i thought about it so i was like bet #and then drew a server exclusive happy ferdinand emote #and that was the start of me somehow being able to have like.... ten emotes in that server #some of them were just me joking and then mods encouraging me #cause i used to use felix for every single art prompt theyd give and one week someone said the prompt was pog #and i just was so upset because dude why would i wanna draw felix for that hes not pog #so a mod was like hey if you make a pog felix emote we ill add it to the emotes here #so i once again was like bet and then posted it and then they really added it lmao #anyway sorry for so many rambles please feel free to use them on discord in whatever server #i cant really expect everyone to credit me but also im not really concerned since i fear people know my nands a mile away

[vepaluiron]

Sylvanas Windrunner, Ranger-General of the Blood Elves of Quel'thalas

vereesa -- sylvanas roleswap au??? i kept seeing banshee queen vereesa in that one time rift timeline and had sudden brainrot over it, so now this exists!

#anyways i have many many thoughts about this #you know its bad when you start thinking about the fictional political implications of an au #like on one hand i really do think sylvanas would rather shoot kael'thas through the eye before letting the elves split #on the other the only reason why they split in the first place was from alliance bigotry and at that point what can ya do #also i think sylvanas would personally throttle varian if she found out that vereesa's envoys were getting killed #also it would be very easy to sylvaina this au but that's for another time #sylvanas windrunner #world of warcraft #fanart #vepaluiron art

[unexpectedbrickattack]

experimentin w shit heehee

#fake peppino #arts #mine #horror #eye strain #guh #body horror #a lil tho but i just think thats a more commonly blacklisted tag than 'horror' #spooky month is the only time im like. i guess i should TRY to draw spooky shit #i always feel like my style is too loose and roumnd to convey it in the way i want to #but spooky month is like okay u can fuck around and fuck up and itll still be good. the spirit of spookyness n all that #i love horror so much but it feels so hard to grasp. like what is ACTUALLY scary yknow? #its very easy to say whats not scary but then its also so hard to stop urself from doing the same things lol #to be fair. stories and 'motion' (through the use of comics or animations) are far easier ways to convey things like suspense n stuff #still art is like. well that is an image alright lol #not entirely true tho; theres an artist i dont know the name of that did trailcam images that were photorealistic #and theyre sooooooooo fuckin creepy #like when i get around to doing more fp art i wanna use that and the lighting in it as practice #okay thats it i think; gonna draw furry shit bc i need comms yay yippeeeeeee

[ghastlyaffairs]

for something as trivial and simple those feelings sure are hard to get rid of

also made a gif a version for fun + alt version with no tears under the cut

the gif is in very low resolution...this is a feature (i could make it bigger but that would require saving each frame individually and than glueing it all together. also i feel like low resolution suits it better. aesthetically and fits the mood)

#hs #homestuck #dirk strider #eye strain #probably? if you think i should tag something else let me know!! #anyway hooray its time for rambling in the tags #so uhhh heres the teæ i've been sick for like a week and you know how it is when suddenly your throat becomes the main gunk warehouse #and you can't breathe lol. wish i could just pull it out. anywaaayy this is basically a vent piece for me being sick lol #also i could draw remotively the same thing with kris deltarune. oh how easy it is to project having a cold #though i have been also experiencing troubles with feelings recently as well....how fitting for dirk #speaking of the man himself (enough of me) his relationship with his own Heart...is peculiar to say the least #the thing i love about alphakids is that despite being so feral they were. so relatable. i cannot stress this enough how unwell they are an #and how they represented being a teen so well. yeah being 15 years old makes that to you #imagine being an emotional mess and trying to fit the 'norm' and act normal about your friends so youre not offputting #and then you fall in love with you friend and your ai clone falls in love with him too looool noone makes out of this one alive #uhh literally. godtiering stuff and dying remember #and speaking of it. tw for suicidal talk for the rest of tags #do you ever think dirk was suicidal. of course the part of when he teleports his head to jake was totally planned and he knew he would -> #wake up as dreamself but. don't you think the moment he cut his head off was sort of. cathartic. how much did he hate his own guts #beheading himself not only for the plan...but also because he thought he 'deserved' it #also wow he is a Prince and was literally beheaded don't you think its funny hahaa #sigh poor thing #this has ended on a not the very pleasant note hm #also fckkkkkk i didn't draw anything with rose/mary for the lesbian visabilty week #(putting the slash because tumblr search system has a dumb gag with showing you posts that contain the tag inside the other tag. #and i don't want this post to show up for the ros/mary fans because it's not!!!! its rose's father emotional crisis post!!!!) #update YOOOO WHAT THE HELL THE GIF HAS EVEN LESS PIXELS THEN I PLANNED fantastic #this your breakfast now tumblr. enjoy your crunchy flakes of dirks meltdown. mwah

[civilization-illstayrighthere]

Hey so I’ve mentioned this a lot of times on my main blog, but I wanted to put this out over here since it is Hallow’s Eve. I always give out little tchotchkes on Halloween along with candy. This year, I’ve completely switched over to 100% doohickeys and doodads— think mechanical pencils, shaped erasers, little notebooks, squishes, vampire teeth and spiders rings and all. It started years ago in college when I signed up for a dorm Halloween event where kids from an area that was too dangerous to really trick or treat through got bussed in to trick or treat at our dorm. I bought some candy and dollar store Halloween themed stuff with what i had. And you know what the kids went ape shit over?

Motherfucking. Mechanical. PENCILS!!

These kids could not get enough of them. They literally went “PENCILS??!” I had never seen kids get so hyped up for pencils lmao. They were the first things to go. Candy is fleeting; the little pencils you can bring to school to flex are eternal, until you inevitably lose one of the refill parts and then they aren’t but listen, in that one moment they are infinite. And its nice thinking that maybe some kids who don’t always have access to school supplies not only get them, but get them in fun shapes and designs.

Anyway. I recommend people to give out fun stuff like this not just because kids seem to genuinely enjoy them, but also because there’s this thing called the Teal Pumpkin Project here in America. You can put out a teal pumpkin to show that you are giving away non-candy items and sign your address up so parents of children with allergies know that there are houses their kids can safely and happily trick or treat at! It’s a win-win! Plus, if you accidentally bought too much, it’s not like candy— just pack it away, pencils and fidget spinners will be good next year, too! :)

#its such an easy and fun thing to do #and it helps make Halloween accessible for some kids who might otherwise not be able to participate #i always think about stuff like that #my step-grandparents had a ramp built at their house for them #but one great unintended side effect is that they always got a lot of children in wheelchairs to their house on Halloween #who were so so excited they could go up to the door and ring the bell for once :’) #so like i always try to think of ways to maybe include people who might have trouble otherwise when i can! #and this is such a little but easy to do change #i like to source my stuff from the dollar store targets dollar area and amazon #i bet party supply stores (think party favor bag stuff) would work great too #so. if you have time tomorrow maybe run on over to the dollar store during your lunch hour #grab some random little things. kids will go crazy. maybe you’ll brighten someone’s day

[uncanny-tranny]

Part of my experience with abuse is hoping I get a kid like me so I can know how easy it can be to love them, how easy it is to not treat them how I was treated, and breaking that cycle. It was only hard for them to love me as a child because they didn't love me in the first place. They wished for me to know the hate they had, and I refuse to carry their water for them like that. It was never hard to love me.

#mental health #mental health recovery #abuse #abuse tw #even if i never become a dad i know what it's like to love strangers as though they were my flesh #and i wouldn't wish them the hate that i experienced #treating myself like a stranger in some ways helped me realize i never deserved any of it #anyway. if you were treated this way: you weren't hard to love as a child #even the most 'out of control' chuldren are not impossible to love #aand the effort to love them is worth it every time #because loving and respecting people is worth it even when it's not always easy #like i'm not saying parenting is easy. but the easy part ought to be the love part #maybe that's the first easy thing you should do before having children i think #because as a hastag abused kid: we can tell when you hate us. we can feel the searing hatred #we can tell when you wouldn't care if we died. and it sticks with you #and you become an ANTI-role model to us #i am well into my life as an adult and my abusers from childhood are STILL my anti-role models because of how awful they were

[louismygf]

some louis tomlinsons i never posted ^_^

#louis tomlinson #louisupdates #louisprojectstracks #lfltracks #mindofwalls #tracksintheam #usertomlinsonsource #dailytomlinson #im not Getting his likeness it's making me so insane #does it look like him?!!?!? no but if i caption it louis Then u will know #anyw these r sketches that still look kinda presentable to me #souwee if these look unfinished unpolished it's bc they are shdjdjd #vans louis & chemical formula louis were way back in 2021 (when i first became a fan) #afhf one some time in 2022 #all the others were drawn in feb 2023 except the aotv one which was march 2023 #aotv being. the one where he's in a suit yup #i wanna practice drawing him some more. ive been practicing when i have time (not a lot) since 2021 basically. he's become my muse kinda ! #i need to work on my realism🥲 it's the effect of never ever stanning a real person... so all ive drawn my whole life is anime&cartoons LOL #i have to draw him everyday i wanna like. devote all my free time into getting my fanart of him to look Right #you look like youd be easy to draw BITCH. if that's an insult then saying louis is hard to draw must be high praise!!!!! #ignore the fact that it may be just a skill issue on my end #if you read this far... erm... thanks! rbs are super appreciated thank you! ❤️ #my louis #liz.art

[dr3amofagame]

i feel like ,,, like we talk a lot about how fear-motivated c!dream's actions are, yeah, because you know c!dream is consistently paranoid as fuck and So Much of why he's like that is because he's too scared to think straight and doing batshit insane shit as a result, but at the same time i think that his ... awareness? of this? can be vastly overestimated. c!dream doesn't like being afraid. c!dream is historically Really Fucking Bad at admitting or acknowledging when he's actually terrified of a situation, because that means he's lost control of it. if he's Worried about a situation he's still ahead of it, if he's Cautious or making preparations or getting things in line to make sure that those closest to him don't get in the line of fire he's still retained a degree of control, but all of that isn't quite the same as admitting he's doing anything because he's scared out of his mind, because scared out of his mind isn't exactly a state that c!dream likes to be in.

and this is why c!dream is so adamant on transactional relationships with anyone that he perceives as having a modicum of real power, because being useful to powerful people makes him less of a target because they need something from him. this is why he is so desperate to convince himself that he's on top when it comes to sam, when it comes to quackity, when it comes to wilbur, and he's saying all of this hidden inside his own hell after hiding there for months having barely confronted c!quackity before getting the hell out of dodge. this is why he scrambles to make sure to show that he's not indebted to technoblade and why he puts himself in foolish's service within minutes of meeting him and why a fucking feeling of power against an unarmed man he could've locked in a box with him with a press of a button was enough to get him to shut up and obey no matter how damn unsubstantiated that feeling ended up being because he couldn't bear to lose it, even just within his own head

and so you know, when c!dream calls c!tommy the one thing out of his control as a motivation for exile during the same time he had to fight off multiple coups explicitly with the desire to do away with him so that theyd be able to "rule the server," like. look. c!dream is just so fucking far from a reliable narrator. i'm sure he could give me an itemized list of how c!tommy has ruined his life, i'm sure he can say all these things about how c!tommy causes chaos and causes problems and doesn't listen to anyone, i'm sure he can go on and on and on about how it'd be a different story if c!tommy just listened to him for once. but let's be real, here--as much as he's convinced himself that he's trying to get control of the one thing out of his control, what's closer to reality is that c!tommy was the one thing he did feel like he could control (hello, the discs) when literally everything else wasn't

#c!dream is so damn delusional about his own feelings like #like yeah c!tommy causes problems c!tommy doesn't listen c!tommy was going to pursue the disc war during a time #where c!dream particularly couldn't deal with any more on top of what was already on his plate #but c!tommy (guy who can be made to listen if you just have one of two pieces of vinyl) wasn't the Least Controllable Part Of His Life #like come on now #c!tommy was an easy excuse when he was up to his ears in problems #because anger and annoyance were 20x easier to cope with than existential dread and terror

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OOH YEAH BABY! PARTY TIME BABY! MUSIC! DRINKS! SOCIAL PRESSURE & A PSYCHEDELIC BREAK DOWN! WELCOME TO VAMPIRE SOCIETY MOTHERFUCKER! ARE YOU SCARED? DO YOU UNDERSTAND YET? ITS OKAY IF NOT. FIRE DISSOLVED IT! ITS ALL GONE NOW. HAVE FUN!

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #jrwi suckening spoilers #RRAAHH IM IN LOVE WITH THIS SHOW SOOO GOODDAMN MUCH!! each o these characters has STOLEN my HEART!!! #LIKE EMIZEEELLL i love emizel so much.. runnin around announcing that HE isa PRINCE while shiloh FINALLY quietly clicks the pieces together #nathan hanover you MADMAN!!! that slow dramatic guitar riff as emizel makes that announcement was so fuckin COOL UGHHHH #MR HANOVER DOES IT AGAIN just creating tracks that absoultely WORM into my MIND and HHEAARRT UUGHHGHH #emizel is so cool and so funny and so adorable UUGHH ill gush abt him more when i finally post my emizel n soda doodle page #ARTHUR FUCKING BENNET. i totally get why grizz has a hard time playing him. hes cool and stoic n its not easy to play a man o little words #BUT BBOOOY DOES HE DO IT WELL!! arthur DOES come off as so stoic n cool & it just makes his lil misfortunes all the more charming #like falling into the red fear or confrontin edward twilight or accidentally doing lsd. I LOVE THATS HES THE BAD LUCK GUY. #okay uhhu uhh i have limited room here what else should i say uhh. THE NPCS. MY GOD THE NPCS. CHARLIE U WONDERFUL MADMAN #edward twilight is SUCH a funny fucking antagonist. and supposedly his magic stuff is super scary?? SO EXCITED TO SEE MORE OF THAT #ill ramble abt mr deacon keller later eheh i have a. uh. a doodle page in the works. so in the meantime DAYBRINGER SOLOMON!! #“HERE COMES THE SUN MOTHERFUCKER!” “ILL SEE YOU IN HELL. NOT. IM GOING TO HEAVEN. BITCH.” like come on now. oh my god. i need him #BIG POWERFUL BEAST AND EVERY WORD HE SAYS HAS ME CRACKING UP. THE MUFFLED VOICE IN THE DARK BROKEN BY “LIGHT!” #TRULY HILARIOUS AND YET TRULY HORRIFYING. I FUCKIN LOVE CHARLIE NPCS SO MUCH. I HOPE WE SEE HIM AGAIN OHH MY GOOOODDD #OKAYokay. im normal now. ill talk abt the piece. if u read my tags this far then u get special secret knowledge abt the artistic process #IM VERY HAPPY WITH MY COLORS! i know they were hallucinating on drugs so i just recalled the times i did drugs & used that as my influence #REMEMBER KIDS! acid is totally fine if ur safe and responsible about it. do acid and then stare at my art for a bit trrruuust me. IT MOVES! #anyway i think thats all my thoughts here. thank you for looking at my art n thanku if ur one o the ppl that says nice things in the tags #U are LITERLY my life blood i pick up each of u n kiss u so sweetly on the head. remember to try acid!!!!

[lightningidle]

Fig's line "I don't think I'm an artist, I think I'm just a good friend" has not left my head at all. Just...

You're Fig Faeth and your horns came in over the summer and you pick up the bard class as a form of adolescent rock 'n' roll rebellion, and it works! It's exactly the outlet you need! You give a guy you just met drumsticks and you start a band and it's good enough that within a year and a half you're touring. You are, in every sense, good at being a bard.

And then, finally, your junior year, you start to take it seriously. Your art goes from an outlet and a form of rebellion to a practice. A discipline. (Can rebellion exist within a discipline?) Your classmates know what they want to do with their work. They all have a thesis statement. And yeah, there's cohesion in the music you make, but you've never had to think about why you make it. You've never sat down and dissected what it is about bass that speaks to you. You've never poured over your lyrics to pick at any deeper meaning. Why should you? You don't play music for a grand design, you do it to... huh, why do you do it?

(Your art is the one form of self-expression that feels as safe as Disguise Self does, because even if you're pouring your heart onto the page and then screaming it in front of thousands of people, it's not like you're really making yourself known. You can sing I'm lonely, I'm scared, I'm furious, and your fans will sing it right back, and there will still be the distance between performer and audience to keep your heart safe.)

Now you're being asked to look inward to explain the artistic choices you're making, and you can't help but recoil at that, because you'd rather do anything than look inward. Meanwhile, your classmates have no problem with it, so you start to wonder if you're a real artist at all. Can your art be authentic if it only exists to bolster a thesis statement? Has your art been unauthentic this whole time because you've never really thought about a thesis statement before? Is that what makes it art, and not just the next track on somebody's teen angst playlist?

You can't think about yourself— acknowledging your own existence makes you want to puke. So if your music is an extension of yourself, (and it is, even if it's just because the spotlight reveals only what you want it to,) you can't think about your music. You can't. You have to. Your grade depends on it.

You're Fig Faeth, and you keep multiclassing because you'd rather be a good friend than a great artist. If introspection is what great art demands, then fuck it. You must not be a bard at all.

#Dimension 20 #fig faeth #fhjy #Idle Chatter #my last two years of college were when I started to get more and more nauseous about my own art #because I wasn't being taught how to make the art I wanted to make #the whole curriculum's focus was on gallery art #which infuriated me! I wanted to make art that didn't have to involve twelve layers of meaning and metaphor to be considered good!! #so I drove myself into the ground time and again trying to make (miserable) work that I thought would fit the criteria of a Real Artist #anyway it's been 4 years and I'm just now picking at why I don't enjoy creating anymore so Fig's whole arc has hit home in a major way #ALSO. AAAAALSO. THE ADHD STRUGGLE WE SEE WITH BOTH FIG AND KRISTEN. LOVING SOMETHING BUT STILL STRUGGLING WITH FOLLOW THROUGH #BEING TOLD YOU'RE NOT DOING ENOUGH WHEN IT'S SO FUCKING HARD JUST TO GET WHERE EVERYONE ELSE IS AND NOT UNDERSTANDING WHY IT'S HARD FOR YOU #it was easy and now that the rubber's hit the road it's hard for you but not for others so it must be YOU that's the problem #you must be lazy or stupid or just not suited to this after all even though it's part of a pattern that has been happening all your life #if you were good enough or cared enough then surely the discipline would come easily to you! the way it comes easily to all your classmates #SCREAMS I gotta stop before I write a second essay in the tags. I'm so normal you can trust me to be normal about D&D characters

[rushingheadlong]

You know something I don't think I've ever seen people talk about is how Freddie changed the lyrics for Big Spender.

Because in case you don't know, all original versions of the song are sung by women - and it is made very clear that they are singing to men:

The minute you walked in the joint I could see you were a man of distinction A real big spender [....] So let me get right to the point: I don't pop my cork for every man I see Hey, big spender Spend a little time with me

Probably not too surprising, then, that when Queen performed this song in 1974 Freddie had to do a bit of a gender-switch on it:

Though, it would probably be more accurate to say that Freddie made this song gender-neutral because he didn't change it to be about a woman. He eliminated the first use of "man" entirely and then sang "I don't pop my cork for everyone I see" (instead of "every man").

And honestly there's probably a whole dissertation you could write just about those changes alone, but what I really love is when Queen brought the song back in 1986 and Freddie changed the lyrics again:

Because yes he still dropped the first "man" but the "everyone" is changed and Freddie instead sang "every guy" with just the barest hint of a "-rl" sound at the end to give him plausible deniability if anyone asked about it.

So much of Freddie's music speaks to his experiences as a queer man but, because of the nature of the times in which he lived, he couldn't always be directly open about that fact. Most of his love songs are intentionally vague, and he sang about "somebody" or "you" to avoid having to use gendered terms as much as possible.

Freddie singing "I don't pop my cork for every GUYrl I see" wasn't just an adjustment to the original lyrics, it was a specific change from how Freddie had sang it before in order to make it more gay in a way that he could rarely be with his own music, and that is what I adore about this. It's such a little thing, but it gives such a unique insight into how Freddie balanced his sexuality and his stardom, and how the relationship between those two changed over the nearly 12 years between these performances.

#freddie mercury #queen #queen band #freddie #text #ramblings #long post // #I got the Rainbow on dvd for xmas and I've been thinking about this a lot since then #and thinking about it even more after posting yesterday's gifset #it's SUCH a little thing but it's made me emotional ever since the first time I've noticed it #the transformation from Freddie ''I can't tell anyone I'm gay or it'll ruin everything'' Mercury in 1974 #to Freddie ''Four cocks fighting - ooh it's getting nice this!'' Mercury in 1985 #perfectly summed up in two video clips #idk. sometimes I feel like in defense of Freddie's queerness some fans take it to the opposite extreme #and insist that it was SO UNBELIEVABLY OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE ALL THE TIME in the 70s/80s that Freddie was gay #when in actuality... no it really really wasn't #and that's IMPORTANT. the ways in which Freddie had to hide himself and the ways in which he chose not to are IMPORTANT. #and erasing those decisions from his history or pretending they were easy ones to make isn't defending his queerness #it only serves to erase it even further