#WHY CRUEL WORLD WHYYYY | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

korereapers · 8 months

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Title: Stray thoughts

Fandom: One Piece

Pairing: zosan/sanzo/whatever

Rating: Explicit

AO3

One thing about being the crew's cook, is that Sanji is usually the first one to wake up, and the last one to go to sleep. He takes his job seriously, really, and doesn't really mind the sacrifice if it's to have his mates well fed and ready for what the world throws at them.

The bad thing, though, is that he rarely has time for himself, and he means, time to dedicate to himself and himself only. Sleeping in the same room as the rest of the men makes it even more difficult, but luckily for him, that night everyone seems to be fast asleep.

Fucking finally.

It's not that he usually dedicates a lot of time to himself like this, but he allows himself to enjoy it, tired from the day, dexterous fingers unbuttoning his own pants, carefully slipping his hand under his clothes.

He indulges himself and tries to think of a fantasy, a simple one. Maybe Nami's mouth, her quick hands that were trained to steal and hijack, and that would surely know what to do with the growing problem between his legs. She would never reciprocate, he knows that, but a small fantasy hurts nobody, and nobody will know about it, ever. He might be… pushy sometimes, but something like that would be more than uncomfortable. Utterly mortifying. That fucking marimo would tease about it endlessly and-

Wait, why is he thinking about Zoro, again?

He thinks about that crooked smile of his, that he has been seeing less and less lately. Maybe he has finally realized the responsibility he has on the ship, that fucking good for nothing. How others rely on him when even the captain wavers.

Would he smile like that if he took Sanji in his mouth, he wonders. If he pinned him to the wooden floor and had his way with him? Would the adrenaline of it all, the rush, the anger of their rivalry, make him smile again?

No, no, wait. He was thinking about Nami and her beautiful hands and lips, how and when did his thoughts go to the fucking marimo of all people? Sanji feels the blood leave his face, very consistently concentrating on his erection, a few drops of blood running down his nose.

"What the fuck…"

Blue eyes go to the swordsman's sleeping form, making sure that he is indeed sleeping. Luckily enough, he snores like a fucking elephant, the remnants of who knows how many jars of beer still in his system.

Thinking about Nami doesn't seem to work, so he tries to think about Robin. Robin, with those breathtaking blue eyes, her amazing figure, her many, many hands that surely know what to do. Maybe she could pin him to the ground almost as easily as Zoro-

Wait what.

"Whyyyy…" he quietly laments, his dick still hard as a rock against his palm. Maybe even harder than before.

He thinks about being pinned to the ground by him, quite easily, even if he struggles, even if he kicks him and curses him. He would probably know what he is doing, and he would probably want him as violently as Sanji does. He would bite his neck, get rid of his clothes unceremoniously, maybe even tear them, only to rile him up. He would ruin his expensive suit, ruin him without uttering a single word.

Sanji moans softly, picturing the swordsman on top of him, pushing him to his limit but never crossing his boundaries. He probably wouldn't be gentle, but he wouldn't be cruel. He would tease his cock, fuck him with his fingers before doing it himself. He seems to be good at that, at dealing with men in bed, specially men that can get bratty like Sanji, men that need to be put in their place, men that need to be torn apart like-

He feels blood dripping down his nose, and he is terrified of his thoughts, of the intensity, of how he seems unable to stop thinking about a man making him moan until his throat hurts, about using and abusing his throat. Especially that man. It should fill him with disgust, and yet he cannot stray from it.

He touches himself furiously, thinking about his tongue in his ass, always speaking better through actions than through words. Making Sanji sing like a mockingbird. He thinks about his cock, knowing that he probably deals with it as expertly as he does with his swords. He thinks about him biting his ear, his neck, as he fucks him from behind, making Sanji's powerful legs tremble.

Sanji comes quickly and abundantly. He hates every second of it. It does indeed ruin his suit and his underwear, and it leaves him tired and with his mind completely blown.

Was it because of their fight, earlier? Has he had a little bit too much to drink? Has he accidentally poisoned himself? No, that's impossible. Has he inhaled some kind of toxic gas? He has heard that carbon monoxide is especially dangerous. He cleans his hand, and silently exits the room, his legs still shaking.

The night is beautiful, fresh air caressing his hair and face, but Sanji finds himself trying to light up a cigarette without success, his hands shaking a little bit too much, which is unacceptable for a professional cook like him.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck…"

The crisis doesn't seem to subside when he finally manages to light it up, inhaling so much smoke in his anxiety that he almost chokes.

Sadly for poor, poor Sanji, not even the threat of a more than possible lung cancer is enough to take the fucking marimo out of his head, and with him, the crisis Sanji is dealing with in the middle of the night, unable to even take care of himself and his clothes.

"But. But I love women… I love women. That's who I am… that's…"

He looks up to the moon and stars, as if they had the answer to his pleas. They remain silent, the same as Sanji, who has to make himself content with screaming internally until his nose stops bleeding from the sudden rise of blood pressure.

"Fuck," he repeats, eloquently.

That's, ironically, everything he can do.

#my stuff #one piece #opla #zosan #sanzo #vinsmoke sanji #roronoa zoro

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writingsoftwistedwonderland · 1 year

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Mario Party Biters

Character: Floyd Leech Description: You, Floyd, Trey, and Jade play mario party together! nothing bad happens :3 Word Count: 479

Very short, but very sweet

Floyd Leech X Male!Reader

“Shrimpy! How could you… I TRUSTED YOU!!” Floyd shouts as Y/n laughs.

“Oh Floyd, you sweet, innocent soul, you never trust someone in this world”

‘You got a star!’ The tv chimed as Waluigi spun with the cartoony star.

“Cruel CRUEL SHRIMPY! That is a cheap tactic!” Floyd shouts pulling his boyfriend into his lap, kissing the boy's cheek aggressively while his brother shakes his head, also in his boyfriend's lap. Trey snickered softly at the brothers' antics.

“Brother, you used the same tactics on me and trey just a few minutes earlier! You are being a hypocrite!” Jade complains, leaning a bit on Trey, pouting softly at his brother as Trey wrapped his arms around Jade. “See the difference between you and I Jade is that I am better,” Floyd said confidently before his boyfriend pinched his cheek lightly “Nah, the difference is you are a sore winner~” Y/N teases gently, smiling as Trey used his turn, triggering the next mini-game segment.

Shy Guy Says pops up on the screen, Trey, who hadn’t played the game until tonight, reads through the rules, playing the tutorial minigame before reading up.

The gameplay was short and sweet, all four of the members were doing well, Trey was the first to go, accidentally pressing the A button instead of B, getting his barrel cut from the main boat. “Ah well, There I go, good luck you three” Trey leans back, moving as little as possible since he didn’t want to disturb jade who was sitting in his lap. The eel in Trey’s lap stayed focused until sneezing resulting in him pressing the wrong button and getting cut away from the boat as well, having the same fate as his partner deed in the digital sea. “AAAAHH!! Whyyyy! Why did I have to sneeezzzeee” Jade whines, before turning and nuzzling into trey’s shoulder, trey laughs softly, kissing jade’s temple and providing comfort.

“Come on shrimpy~ I know you feel like losing~” Floyd taunted the boy in his lap, swaying a bit to jostle him up to get him to lose. “Nah, I don't feel like losing, I'm too good at this ga- OW FLOYD YOU FUCKER!” and like that Waluigi was sent into the ocean leaving Floyd, who chose Yoshi, to win.

Floyd chuckles, removing his jaw from his boyfriend's shoulder, taking the 15 coins of that round. Floyd kisses the irritated skin, as his boyfriend baps him with his shirt sleeve. Jade shook his head while trey laughed, already use to this behavior since jade usually did the same.

“YOU ARE A CHEATER!” Y/N shouts, face red from being bitten over a Mario party game. “ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR, MY SHRIMPY!” Floyd chuckles, squeezing his boyfriend lovingly before continuing the game.

…

“HOW THE FUCK DID YOU WIN!” “BECAUSE I AM NOT A BITING CHEATER!”

#Octavinelle #Floyd Leech X male reader #Floyd Leech #Trey Clover #Jade Leech #Trey Clover X Jade Leech #Mario Party fic #Oneshot #Short Oneshot

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save-the-villainous-cat · 1 year

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amazing, but why the depressing angst like WHYYYY??? WHAT WAS THE REASON??? Yeah but like anyways it was amazing <3 also like out of smut fluff and angst what's your fav???

BECAUSE spoiler

Yknow. The villain and the hero are two very different people. The villain tries to bury their feelings and be distant while the hero tries to avoid their feelings by flirting and wasting their life.

They’re also two very messed up people who do some fucked up shit. The villain murders (more or less) on a voluntary basis while the hero has this little unhinged aspect to them with a lot of spiking emotions and a lot of guilt building uppppp.

Throughout their relationship though, both learn to open up and find someone who is truly understanding them. And it changes them. The villain shows more emotions and saves their hero because they see the potential and pain they have in them to which they can relate a lot.

The hero begins to understand that wasting their time isn’t leading anywhere. They want to start living instead of wasting it. Both see that there is a lot more to the other than previously thought.

And through their trauma and pain, they can bond with each other and learn to communicate a bit more openly.

HOWEVER. This ending had to be written this way because the world is cruel and it isn’t fair. Both have changed for the better but eventually the villain knows they have to go back to the organisation because (1) their sibling is in danger, (2) if they continue meeting the hero, the hero will probably die and (3) they know the organisation will never let them go.

So, having learnt from the hero to open up and that they’re worth having a life, they have to leave with this little bit of hope. However, they are doomed for as long as the organisation has their sibling.

The hero on the other side was a little unhinged and sorta ready to die at any point in the beginning of the story. Like I said, they were wasting their life and had to learn throughout the story that for example oh holy shit they could’ve died in snippet 3 and that, of course, they do like living. Especially because of the villain.

But life is unfair and they had to accept that the villain had to go. Thanks to their naivety (they’re in love after all) they try to convince their enemy, their lover now, to stay with them to work things out but the villain who knows more about the organisation and their methods is scared shitless that they’re gonna lose the hero and their sibling.

Which they simply cannot.

So, the villain had to leave. To save the hero, to save their sibling and to save themselves whereas the hero had to leave to live a good life on their own.

The villain is the hero of the story, if you will.

#I don’t have a fav when it comes to writing!#mwuah mwuah mwuah #no writing #an answer for an ask

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cuntstable · 11 months

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pucci first impressions ofc

MAN. thank you but the beast is unleashed.

First impressions:

wow dios bestie! alot of people whos jojo opinions i respect like him i cant wait to see what kind of a freak he is as a villain LOL

Impression now:

well. what could i even say. at this point.

favourite moment:

i loved him going insane from guilt and grief and devoting his entire life to the pursuit of a world where the kind of trauma and horror he and his loved ones went through can never happen again and in the process of that quest becoming a cruel and horrible person who lives ultimately a miserable and small existance. all because he got groomed by an evil vampire to think that murder was the way to get to heaven actually and so he became deeply entranced by that delusion and the comfort it brought to the point where he couldnt even consider that maybe he was doing something horribly selfish and destructive to himself and others. smileeee. also second favourite moment is ”frogs on my 800 dollar pants?” and third favourite is smiling excitedly as his arm gets torn off and he presumably gets cannibalized by a baby (made me realize that he is actually nuts)

idea for a story:

what did he get up to in between dios death and the start of stocean? like collecting stands and watching over weather while driving himself further and further into darkness. its so sad and fucked up to think about to me. also second story idea would be him and kakyoin meeting as insane evil teens in the vampire mansion and having a weird ”friendship” lol

unpopular opinion:

this isnt unpopular in MY circles. but um. hes the main villain of his part and arguably the most complex villain character in jojo, even if one could argue villains like kira are better executed. so its a bit cringe and annoying to me when people reduce him to just an acessory to dio LOL. like he is his own character and a far more interesting one than dio with motivations and character drives completely separate from him so ummmmmmmm whyyyys that blond thing always there. hm? you have to wonder why and you especially have to ask why do people keep postioning him as dios servant or ”follower” instead of his actual role as a student and friend. hm.

favourite relationship:

i do however like dios and puccis fucked up evil bestfriendship because. its fucked up but also funny. HOWEVER. PUCCI SIBLINGS FOREVER. like theres no comparison to whatever him and weather have going on omg. perla also. but like that relationship just perfectly sums up his character doesnt it. like he accidentally causes the destruction of wes’ whole life so he steals his memories to survive and to stop wes from killing everyone and its cruel (even if more understandable bc. traumatized children) and fucked up. but then he keeps wes alive and watches over him for decades and keeps him close and safe because he genuinely does wish that things could be different. he cares. all with out ever considering how cruel even THAT is. but once wes gets his memories back and becomes an unignorable threath he doesnt hesistate to kill him. so so so fucked up what the hell

favourite headcanon:

king of autism swag i believe. hyperfixation on jesus to hyperfixation on murder and lying and manipulating pipeline

#jojo #pucci posting

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esorxy · 4 months

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daily updates of thoughts while reading crimson rivers

afterthoughts::

this was so beautifully written and well plotted, it had some of the best scenes and dialogues, and had me swooning, in shock, all of that

(particularly regulus') character development!!! insane!!! this has left me unsatiable, jegulus has me in a chokehold

oh the romance was so sweet, and ever so rewarding after all of the hurt, both jegulus and wolfstar

my only complaint is that its way too long like i lost so much sleep over this, at the end i was so impatient i kept skipping all the side characters povs cos i just wanted to be done with it

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day 1. 10% (games just started)

it took 80k words to get to the start of the games .... what did i get myself into. and i saw tiktoks going like the jegulus WEDDING ?!?!?!?!?! love it when sirius cannot form coherent sentences around remus, but he needs some distraction they literally have the worse luck ever. I'm so glad they dont have horrible communication issues, maybe because theyre all about to die.

oh and if the jegulus parting 'present' wasnt the saddest way to separate especially since they think theyre going to die

aside, i keep comparing sirius to quackity in that hunger games fic and then i remember how much better the dsmp fanfics were especially since i can actually recall the details after like 2 years. back when i thought 100k+ was a long fic oh how naive

so so far, pretty good, im invested in the story enough to not be bored but not THAT invested

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day 2. 31% (games ended, just before interview)

im fuckin invested. why whyyyy so much pain. regulus never fails to be the most hurt in any room aye. and james being touch starved?!? i lived for that shit.

why was it that reading about the games was so thrilling. the life/death oml give my boys a fucking break. they're out now and still no comfort, the only break theyre getting is a break up wtf!!

asides about the games, james was just a dumbass about peter, evan my beloved as always (and glad that the author shares that sentiment), and what the fuck regulus just realising at the end that he had nothing to live for if james died asfhhdsjjfsgjjf

why the fuck was i not satisfied with reading cute one shots or 100k fics,,, the length of this, i don't want to sleep i don't want to eat god help me with this addiction

🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥⬛⬛⬛⬛

day 3. 60% (second games started)

honestly the lack of a mcd tag is the only thing getting me through this. the hope!! i relate to regulus so much on that.

and that's also the only reason im forgiving them for all being fucking IDIOTS and not making the most of their time together. now is the time to profess your love and get your spine realigned my darlings

why is there literally a force field preventing james and regulus from being happy together??? well im not complaining too much because that means that anything they do now is extra special. regulus not being able to resist james??? gahhh im gone.

also them having tea together and actually starting to heal oh theyre so sweet they dont deserve that cruel world.

they literally chose the worst time ever to make up, at least they did at some point, but man they really confessed and got engaged right before... probable death...

oh the amount of pain my poor boys are going through, i wish they can all escape and live in some cozy domestic paradise with everyone they love. but they have to suffer first otherwise the happiness in the end doesn't count for anything.

oh. my. god. CRYING regulus trying to get sirius to kill him and then going soft at the last moment, and i can't believe sirius almost got baited like that and was really about to kill him. but REGULUS, oh my, my sweet gentle boy, he tried so hard, and the aftermath left everyone in fucking pieces.

it is 2.30am, and it takes literally half an hour to make a 2% dent, and i am HOOKED

🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥⬛⬛

day 4. 80% (healing at phoenix)

regulus is on his way to being my favourite and it's entirely cos he's so angsty and unhinged. following through with all of his threats??? fucking hilarious, and his desperate love confessions and having a meltdown every 2 seconds. hes a wreck GET HELP.

sirius, such a literal icon, i strive for his level of don't give a fuck. "what pasta"?!?! my god i love him. hes so gone on remus its sickening. when dumbles asked for his blood, sirius being possessive?!?! if i was remus i would have folded right then and there, literally sold, this man owns him

james high and being obsessed with regulus the angel?!!! im swooning, literal heart attack material. best scene so far.

i love regulus' character development, hes levelled up to be james' first man. goodbye sirius but tbh he has more than enough problems on his own. oh jegulus is so achingly sweet i will not shut up about it. this is the reward after reading through so much couples angst. they love each other so much IM CRYING, the way regulus looked after him after the rescue mission, in all the ways that James didn't after the first games, oh they're finally together and happy, i would die for them.

i am PISSED at how long this fic is. the amount of nothing that I've done these past few days to read this, after this im going to exclusively read one shots for a whole entire week.

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day 5. 100%

sirius dissociating on the roof and remus sitting with him, im sobbing

yeah im deadass sick of the comfort now, theyve had too much that its not special anymore. i just want it to end already.

jegulus finally getting their dream life and dancing by the fireplace,,,, aaaand theyre getting married ahhhhh, my boys,, theyve come so far, i have no words

james holding regulus in bed while they watch the rain to help with his aquaphobia?!!! if thats not the most angsty romantic beautiful scene ever, im in love

why is it so fucking funny that james gets high from getting railed with a dagger to his throat, like legit my man CANNOT even form thoughts anymore hes so far gone 🤐

happily married with 4 kids, its too perfect, domestic, im in shock

aaand guess what im finally finally finished. that took way too long, reading fanfiction should be a full time job.

im never reading anything over 200k in the near future, that was way too much emotional commitment.

#crimson rivers #marauders ao3 #marauders fic recs

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cobalt-axolotl · 6 months

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Nick pawing in a pool of his own tears: why is the world so cruel

Cassidy: for the last time we’re not going to Freddy’s today

Nick: but whyyyy?!?!

#fnaf #into the fazverse #five nights at freddy's #malefactor malfunction au

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angliclamb · 11 months

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also i ate blue takis n now everything hurts why cruel world whyyyy

#the only chip that makes me ouchie #but they're sooooo mmmmmm #📓.donalations

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everlykingston · 1 year

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A teenage nightmare.

"Mom.. Why can't I go out with my friends?" Everly sighed softly. She looked down at her outfit before her mother could say anything about it. She was dressed more than appropriately. The jeans she had on didn't have a single rip in them and she hated that. Her shirt was actually comfortable. She was fully covered. The redhead sighed softly. She pulled her long red hair back into a ponytail and she stared at her parents. She knew they were damn well over protective but this was ridiculous. To say she couldn't hang out with her friends was a new low for them. "Darling you must understand. You just finished filming your first movie. Things are about to be chaotic." She shifted her weight a little as she turned to look at her mother. Hazel eyes rolling as she listened to what her mother had to say. "Look. All I want is a normal day to hang out with my friends. I'm not asking to do anything crazy." she replied with a small groan.

“Well, 'normal' is just a pipe dream for us anyway.” Hearing those words she turned around to see her father was standing behind her now. "I don't care. I want to go and hang out with my friends. I understand that Mother May I just came out but I just want to do something normal like hang out with my friends." As she looked at her father pleadingly. He shook his head. "You're mother is right. You can't just go be a normal kid anymore." Groaning she sat down in the chair somewhat behind her. "Thank you darling." she heard her mother say to her father. She made a face as her parents kissed. "Whyyyy?" She wanted to mutter but it came out louder. "Why can't you just trust me?" she managed to finally ask. "Honey it's not you we don't trust, it's the--" Her father was cut off. "Cruel, cruel world." Her eyes moved from her father to her mother with a sigh.

"Well let me prove myself to you." she countered. "Let me prove that I can handle myself." she added. Her father held up his hand. "It isn't you. It's the world." Everly sighed and shook her head. "Let me prove that I can handle myself is what I meant daddy." She pouted slightly almost causing him to cave in. "Not a chance Everly." She turned to stare at her mother. "It's not fair. I just want to be able to go out!" she retorted. "Darling get your friends to come here. You can order food, do whatever you want in the confines of your own home." Everly didn't even respond. She huffed and walked out of the room. She was going to try to sneak out but she had to make sure her mother wouldn't find her. She had a feeling that if her father found her he wouldn't give her away so quickly so she had to hurry and make sure everything was in place for everything she had planned.

#drabble002 #writing prompt #fame and fortune

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dwter · 3 years

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not to be annoying but holy shit we were so naive about the dteam meetup...like beeduo created an entire friendship out of thin air and lived together for months before dteam has even ever met 😵😵 december BETTER BE GOOD TO US

im going to be depressed.

#ask #i get why bc george wants to go and not ever have to go back like like georogie. Georgie. Please hear us out …….#if tubbo and ranboo meet dream before george does im seriously going to start building up /gen /srs /For Real.#this shit isnt even funny anymore like WHYYYY IS THE WORLD SO CRUEL #at this point dream needs to seriously think abt the private jet investment i cant do this anymor e …..

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official-virtual-hug-dealer · 3 years

Conversation

Tumblr: And here we have this nice video that a lot of people have liked, reblogged, and commented on.

Me: Great, this seems good. Let’s see where-

Tumblr: It doesn’t have subtitles

Me: Ugh, oh well. Happens all the time, I can just-

Tumblr: And this person didn’t reblog a transcription.

Me: *heavy breathing* It’s fine it’s all good. I guess I’ll just have to-... You’re not interrupting me this time?

Tumblr: No, I’ll let you do this next step on your own.

Me: Okay, so now I’ll just go through the comments and reblogs to find a transcription. Surely someone must have thought to put one.

Me: *scrolls through everything*

Me: No. No, this can’t be!

Tumblr: Oh yeah, no one transcribed it.

Me: Noooooooooooo

#the struggle is so damn real #why cruel world #whyyyy #i just wanna understand #but I feel bad for asking someone to transcribe #and so i just #don’t get to listen #pretty used to it though #for the record #i am not hearing impaired #but please #transcribe if you can

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singingshadowfox · 7 years

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Mushi-Shi has taught me to defend my pillows with my life. This may be connected to my love of sleeping (though I never get any sleep).

#mushishi #mushi shi #anime #anime trash #just weeaboo problems #weeabootrash #weeaboo #sleeping #pillow #i love sleeping but i never can fall asleep #why cruel world #whyyyy #ginko (mushishi)#ginko is my waifu #i love him #hes a precious boi and i luv him

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the-sword-lesbian · 4 years

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Broken Hands and Broken Hearts

Kate sat on Maddie’s bed with her arms tightly wrapped around her daughter as she continued to cry her eyes out like she had been doing for the last few hours. She rubbed circles into Maddie’s back trying to calm her down. “There there sweetie. It will be okay.”

Maddie inhaled a huge breath before letting out another massive series sobs. “I don’t understand! What did I do wrong?!”

Kate pushed her daughter off her shoulder for a second, gently wiping tears away with a tissue. “Sweetie you did nothing wrong. None of this is your fault. Okay? He’s the one that messed up.”

“But whyyyy?!” she wailed, collapsing on her mother again. “I thought everything was going so well.” She stopped for a second, a realisation suddenly hitting her before she started sobbing heavily again. “We were supposed to have a date tonight!”

Kate started rubbing her back again while gently rocking her. “Maddie it’s going to be okay. I know it hurts now but sometimes relationships don’t work out.” She started gently combing her fingers through her daughter's hair, holding her tight. “You’re only sixteen, okay? You’ve got plenty of time left to meet someone special.”

Slowly Maddie’s crying subsided as she let her mother gently rock her. After a few minutes she spoke again. “I don’t understand Mom.” she mumbled into Kate’s shoulder. “If he didn’t want to be with me why didn’t he just leave? Why did he have to…” she sniffled, trying to hold back her tears. She looked up into Kate’s eyes pleadingly. “Why did he cheat on me Mom?”

She pulled Maddie back into her arms and held her tightly. How do you tell your innocent child how cruel the world can be? How sometimes people are just terrible. Kate figured that was as probably as good a place to start as any. “I wish I had a better answer for you Pumpkin.” She sighed, continuing to rock her daughter. “But the reality is sometimes people are just terrible. Devin wanted something you didn’t feel comfortable giving him so he broke your trust to go get it…”

Maddie was quiet for a long time, Kate almost wondered if she had dozed off from exhaustion. But after a little while she spoke again, and her voice was so quiet and small it nearly broke Kate’s heart. “I could have… I could have given him that…”

Kate was enraged. How dare the world do this to her precious daughter. How dare she get so torn up that she’s willing to throw herself away for some boy that would toss her aside as soon as he got what he wanted. She hauled her daughter up to face her and put her hands on her shoulders turning Maddie to face her. “Madeline stop!” She was so angry at the world she was fighting back tears of her own as she brought her hands up to her daughter's cheeks, brushing away so many tears with her thumbs. “Don’t you dare just give yourself up for some stupid boy! Don’t just throw away that part of yourself because someone else makes you feel like you have to. Okay?!” Kate sniffled, blinking away her tears so she could look her daughter clearly in the eye. “Maddie... I know not everyone thinks sex is important as I do. But regardless of that, regardless of whether it's super important to you or it's just something casual. You should never, ever feel like you have to share that part of yourself with someone else if You. Don’t. Want. To. Okay? It is YOUR choice to share that with someone else when YOU want to. You chose not to have sex with your boyfriend and instead of respecting that he betrayed you. That’s not a failing on your part. It’s your body, you have the ultimate say in what you do with it.”

Maddie just stared at her mother in silence before gently wrapping her arms around Kate’s neck and hugging her. “Thank you Mom.” she said quietly after a few minutes.

Kate just sighed heavily hugging her daughter tighter. “It’s okay sweetie. I’m sorry for my angry mom rant.”

“No it’s okay.” she said leaning back and wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. “You’re right though. I wasn’t ready for that and that wasn’t okay with him...” Her voice wavered a little but she took a second to steady herself before continuing. “If he couldn’t respect that then… he doesn’t deserve me.” she stated. An air of finality to her voice.

Her mom smiled at her before reaching out to hug her again. “I’m so proud of you Maddie.” She then let go and stood up stretching briefly. “Now let’s go start getting dinner ready before Ellie and your mother get home.”

----------

Victoria sat in her car drumming her fingers on the steering wheel, trying to stitch together every ounce of patience she could muster within herself. She was not going to freak out at her daughter. She was going to calmly drive them home and they would have a conversation like adults and not have a screaming match in the car in the middle of afternoon traffic.

“Why are you so pissed at me about this?”

Well so much for that plan. “I am not ‘pissed’ at you.” She stated in the calmest tone she could manage. “I am ‘upset’ because you started a fight with someone and now you’re suspended.”

“I didn’t start a fight!” Giselle snapped back. “I decked my sister’s boyfriend because I caught him cheating on her!”

“Don’t you yell at me young lady!”

“You’re yelling at me!”

“You started thi-” Victoria paused and took a deep breath. No one could ever argue that Giselle wasn’t her daughter. She always knew exactly how to push Victoria’s buttons to start a fight. But not today. Because she needed to have this conversation. And in order to do that she needed to be as level headed as she could. She exhaled the breath she was holding in a long sigh. “I’m not trying to have a fight with you Giselle.”

“But why are you upset at me?” She asked frustrated. “I get being suspended, but am I not supposed to defend Maddie’s honor in this situation??”

“That’s not the problem.” Victoria snapped, voice rising again

“Then what is the problem?!” Giselle shouted again.

“The problem is you can’t just fucking hit people like that!” Victoria mentally kicked herself for swearing, she was trying to be better about that but her daughter was being so combative and this was becoming a lot harder than it needed to be.

Giselle was somewhat caught off guard by hearing her mother swear like that in the middle of a fight but she recovered quickly. “Well why the hell not!?”

“Because!-” Victoria took another breath trying to calm down while she merged onto the exit ramp. “Because, look where that’s got you. You’ve been suspended, you almost got expelled, and your hand is broken so now you have to sit out of every game for the rest of the season.”

The dark haired girl looked down at the cast on her left hand sulking. She had to admit that missing the rest of the season sucked. But standing up for her sister? “Yeah well… It was worth it.”

Victoria swallowed. That was really the last thing she wanted to hear. She tried to steady herself “Please don’t say that.” Her voice sounded so hollow.

Her daughter looked up at her, still disgruntled. “Why not?”

“Because I don’t want you getting the idea that it's okay to hurt people just because you think the stakes are enough in your favor!” Victoria was falling apart.

“Why not!!”

“Because I don’t want you to turn into me!!!”

That stunned her daughter long enough for Victoria to pull off the road and into the first space she could find. Throwing the car into park she covered her face with her hands and tried to steady her breathing as the tears rolled down her cheeks.

Giselle reached out to touch her mother, her anger completely gone and replaced with sudden concern. “Mama?”

“Ellie…” Victoria pulled her hands away from her face and turned to look at her daughter. Those hazel eyes. Just like Kate’s. Somehow that thought made all of this worse. She took a deep breath and tried to continue. “Ellie I don’t want you to think it's okay to hurt people just because they make you angry. Okay? I don’t want you to lash out at someone you think has wronged you. It doesn’t do any good.” Then her voice broke when she said, “I don’t want you turning into a bully because you think the tradeoff is worth it…”

“Mama… I’m not go-”

“Stop. Ellie let me finish okay?” Giselle closed her mouth and Victoria turned to face forward, hands tight on the steering wheel before continuing. “I was horrible when I was your age okay? I was angry at my parents my whole life and I took it out on everyone else around me. Including Ka-” she choked on her words, taking a moment to steady herself. “Especially… Kate… I just saw this beautiful innocent girl and I was so angry and still in the closet and I didn’t understand all this crap inside of me so I just destroyed her instead.” Victoria dropped her forehead to the steering wheel and cried for a moment while Giselle looked on in silence. After a minute she turned to look at her daughter again “Ellie I need you to understand, I wasn’t just A bully I was THE bully. Your mother’s kids book about bullies? That’s about ME! I was a monster! I am the reason tha-...” She paused for a second, trying to steady herself long enough to make it through this conversation. “I am the reason that your mother almost didn’t survive high school…”

Giselle sat there shocked. Trying to mentally match up the monster her mother was describing with the loving mom Victoria has been to her for her entire life.

After a moment Victoria continued “I carry the guilt of how I treated her and everyone else with me every single day. And my biggest nightmare is to wake up one day and see that you’ve become me all over again. Because then it will be clear that I’ve truly failed you as a mother.”

“Mama…” Giselle wasn’t exactly sure when she’d started crying as well but she looked at her loving mom sitting across from her, soul bared. And she clicked her seatbelt loose reaching up to wrap her arms around her. “It’s okay Mama. I’m sorry.”

Victoria held her daughter in her arms as tightly as she could. “I’m sorry I shouted at you Ellie.”

“I’m sorry I started a fight with you.” Her daughter said, pulling back and leaning against the car door. “And I’m sorry I got suspended.”

Her mother sighed as she leaned back in her seat with her eyes closed. “I’m honestly trying so hard to be the responsible parent right now and not just high five you for punching that fucking prick.”

Giselle chuckled at that. “Swear jar.” she said, smirking.

“Yeah yeah.” Victoria sighed. “Don’t tell your mom, I’ll put a ten in when she isn’t looking.”

“Sooo…” the teen started, running her hands in her short dark hair.

Victoria rolled her head to the side, opening her eyes to look at her daughter. “Hmm?”

Giselle looked up at her mom sheepishly, “Grounded?”

She closed her eyes and turned her head back. “Oh you are so grounded.”

“Yeah I figured.” She said sliding back into her seat. After a moment she spoke up again. “Thanks by the way. For telling me all of that. I know it was probably really hard. And you’re not a monster… You’re actually a really great mom. And I’ll try to be a better daughter.

Her mother turned and smiled at her, reaching out to ruffle her hair she said “You’re a pretty great daughter.”

“Love you Mama.”

“Love you too Ellie.”

----------

Maddie stood at the stove next to her mother, staring into the pot she was supposed to be stirring. Trying to find some sort of answer to her problems in the pasta water boiling in front of her.

Kate nudged her out of her thoughts. “Sweetie that’s going to boil over if you’re not careful.”

She shook her head before reaching up to stir the pot. “Sorry Mom,” she sighed.

Her mother nudged her again. “Penny for your thoughts?”

Maddie sighed again. “I’m just. Trying to figure out how to break up with Devin.” she looked up at her mother. “Any thoughts?”

Kate shrugged at that. “Sorry pumpkin. You’d have more luck asking your mother. She’s literally the only relationship I’ve ever had so I don’t have a lot of experience with breaking up with someone.” She turned her head at the sound of a car door closing. “Speaking of your mother…”

Giselle pushed the door from the garage open holding it for her mother before trudging through the mudroom into the kitchen. Upon entering she was nearly knocked to the floor as she was tackle-hugged by her sister. After regaining her balance she smiled returning the hug and reaching up to brush the smaller girl’s hair back. “Hey Mads. Are you doing okay?”

Maddie nodded, head buried in her sister’s chest. “Is your hand okay?”

She shrugged. “It’ll be alright. This cast is annoying though.”

“Sorry you got suspended for punching my stupid boyfriend.” Maddie mumbled into her sister’s shirt.

Ellie sighed, she thought back to her conversation with her mom a little while ago. “Yeah well… It’s my own fault. Probably should have just yelled at him honestly.”

Victoria pat her daughter on the back as she shuffled by her, heading towards Kate.

Kate stopped cooking for a second to reach up and hug her wife, resting Tori’s head on her shoulder and gently combing through her hair. “Hey there.”

Victoria hugged her wife tighter, sighing, “Being a parent is hard.”

Kate chuckled at her. “Oh Tori please don’t tell me you’re just figuring that out now.”

The tall blonde just stayed there with her arms wrapped around her wife, mumbling into her shoulder. “No… Just a rough talk with Ellie.” She leaned up to look into Kate’s eyes. “I told her about Blackwell.”

“Oh honey.” Kate gently cupped Tori’s face in her hands, standing on her toes to press their lips together. “Are you okay?” She asked after a minute.

“Yeah…” she sighed. “Is it alright with you if I have a glass of wine?”

Kate smiled warmly at her. “That’s fine. You chill here and I’ll go get it for you.” She turned to her daughter “Ellie can you come stir this sauce while I help your mother out?”

The dark-haired girl just held her left hand up gesturing to the cast. “Uhh…”

Her mother put her hands on her hips, narrowing her eyes slightly. “Giselle, you’re the captain of the JV rugby team I’m confident that you’re more than capable of stirring a pot right-handed.”

As Kate walked off to pour a glass Victoria went to set her purse down when she felt her other daughter wrap her arms around her middle. “Hi to you too Maddie.”

“Thank you for not being too mad at Ellie Mama.” she said from behind her mother.

“Yeah well…” Victoria turned around to reciprocate her daughter’s hug. “Sorry your boyfriend turned out to be an asshole.”

“Swear jar!” Kate called from the pantry.

“It’s okay.” Maddie sighed. “I’m only sixteen, I’ve got plenty of time to meet a nice guy.”

“Honey I wish I had your level of positivity at your age.” she said reaching for the glass Kate was handing her as Maddie released her hold.

“Hey Mads, your pasta’s about to boil over.” Ellie called out from the stove.

“Oh shoot!” Maddie said running back over to salvage her spaghetti. “Sooo…” she started after getting her cooking under control. “Does this mean Ellie is grounded?”

“Oh yeah.” Victoria said, taking a sip from her glass. “She’s definitely grounded.”

Maddie heard her sister sigh beside her. “For how long?” she asked, chewing her lip.

“Until the cast comes off.”

Everyone, Victoria included, turned to look at Kate in shock, talking over each other.

“What?!”

“Mom! No way!”

“Katie isn’t that a bit harsh?”

Kate looked at her daughter with a calm but serious expression. “Giselle I understand that you may have had noble intentions but what you did was still very bad. You acted rashly and now you’re injured, and you very nearly got expelled. I know this seems like I’m being unreasonable, but this is a very serious lesson I want to make sure that you learn.”

Ellie just looked at her mother in silence before staring down at her feet, eyes watering. “I understand.” Her voice was shaky.

“That being said…” Kate paused long enough to ensure both her daughters were paying attention. “You can still go to New York for your birthday.”

Both girls ran up to hug their mother, Ellie muttering quiet “thank yous”

Kate freed herself enough to look at both her daughters before continuing. “You guys have been planning this for months and even though I want you to learn your lesson I’m not going to take your birthday present away from you. I’m also not going to let your sister fly across the country by herself for two weeks just because you did something dumb for her sake.”

The girls wrapped their arms around their mother again. Victoria coming up behind them to join in the family hug.

“Love you Mom” Ellie said quietly.”

“Love you too.” Kate replied, smiling at her wife over her daughters. “All three of you.”

#life is strange #lis #chasemarsh #Kate marsh #victoria chase #chasemarsh family #there is so much angst here I am so sorry #fanfic #The Family Chase

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