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#Teen Fortress 2
tf2incorrectquotes · 4 months
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Sniper and Heavy are sitting in the break room alone:
Sniper: ...
Heavy: ...
Sniper: ...
Heavy: ...
Sniper: ...
Heavy: ...
Sniper: ...
Heavy: ...
Sniper: *slaps his knees as he stands* Well, its about time I give my folks a call! Good talk, mate!
Heavy: Hm.
Sniper: We should do this again, sometime!
Heavy: Mm-hm.
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hacksplatter · 9 months
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girl help i cant stop drawing this lead poisoned thing and her hot wife
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cerchionero · 8 months
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Hello everybody! I have these adorable plushies, and I'll be glad if someone wants to purchase them. Feel free to DM me if you're interested! :3
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blueberryismilk18 · 8 months
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HEADCANON REQUESTS
Hi hi I’m Blue, and I’ll write headcanons for any of the fandoms that are in the hashtags, maybe more just ask. ———————————————————————————————————- Stuff I WONT write:
nsfw, sorry I don’t feel comfortable doing that
pedoph1l1a (gross mfs get off my page NOW)
zooph1l1a (^^^)
child/domestic/partner abuse, just abuse in gen
nothing extremely violent or gorey
incest
I WILL write:
Fluff ofc
angst
polyamory (you incest MFS GET OFF MY PAGE)
Character that are minors will be platonic only (I’m not age-ing up characters you weirdos)
if you have any questions about what I will write for ask away
————————————————————————
just a quick thing to add, I apologize if I take long with headcanons I have other things too do but just know they will get done sooner or later.
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stormvanari · 4 months
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2️⃣ kinds
and a sandwich-eating mercenary
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some-pers0n · 1 year
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My day be so fine until I remember how utterly gut-wrenchingly tragic Heavy's backstory is.
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thedevilsruby · 1 year
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*Offense reading bibles*
Scout: Why are we doing this?
Soldier: Because I want to join the church up the street and Pyro needs to learn some morals and values.
Scout: *Looks at Pyro and back at Soldier* You look at him and tell me there's a god.
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bonkatomicpvnch · 9 months
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intro/pinned
hi im cooper and i like a lot of nerdy shit and ill probably put beavis and butthead fanart on your page
i draw sometimes
let's be mutuals if you're really really really cool
carrd:
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6870. See-More is completely obsessed with Team Fortress 2's Demoman. He even virtually teams up with the Titans as "BlackCyclops875" whenever they play the game. He has also seriously mulled over applying for Scottish citizenship because of this.
Submitted by Anonymous
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cage-cat-yt · 1 year
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Wowie art page, I'm on a streak posting art
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The urge to draw something goosebumps and opal related is strong but like idk what to draw :(
Anyway, thanks for reading! Remember to hydrate and I hope you have a good day :)
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darkness9000a · 2 years
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tf2incorrectquotes · 2 months
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Scout: You know "ah-kay-uhk" Latin?
Spy: I got bored with classical Latin.
Scout: You know normal Latin?
Spy: Yes, someone from my knitting club taught me.
Scout: YOU HAVE A KNITTING CLUB?!
Spy: *rolls his eyes* You don't know everything about me, Scout. Now do you want a sweater or a scarf?
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athfiq · 2 years
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Shake (telling a bad Bible story to Meatwad): “Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one!”
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cerchionero · 9 months
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Guys, look what a cute merch I'm going to sell!
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They're cute as heck 😭
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drawnfamiliarfaces · 5 months
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If Chase Yuong and the First Ninja start a fight, who will win in your opinion? Either way, it's going to be epic.
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anon ANON thank you. I've been dying to think more about those two in the same context, ever since i realized the similarities of these two idiots i like (greenish hair? martial artist? magical? kinda lived long???) But i've shoved those crossover-ish ideas away since i am busy with other stuff lol. but this gives me an excuse >;)
Ok, if we do NOT take canons in consideration (because lets be truthful, cartoons rarely can give a full scope of a character to our satisfactions lol) so I have 2-3 vague scenarios in which they clash (IMO either of them can win??? (because i like them both, even if i am more of First fan, so I cant decide who of them winning would be more entertaining lol)):
If First Ninja in his prime (sometime after imprisoning Sorcerer but before the Ultimate Lesson) clashed with 700 yo Chase Young (since this fucker is canonically 1500 yo) who would probably try to defeat First in order to make him part of his Jungle Cats harem:
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Chase is ridiculously, stupidly overpowered but one could argue that at 700 he hasn't yet reached the height of all his powers, so First would certainly have a fighting chance. First is supposedly uniquely trained since (probably) his birth by his Ninja Clan and continuous battles with the Sorcerer (and most likely other creatures, like Sorceress and Tengu and etc.) throughout his teenage-young adult life to take on enemies like Chase - overpowered magical beings/soulless monsters - with the help of Ninja Mask and all its powers.
Admittingly, in this case the win will most likely go to Chase, if only because of his experience and overwhelming array of powers at his disposal. Though considering we do not know the full scope of Ninja Mask's powers, First has like maybe 15-25% chance to win (and at least 30-45% in my mind if i consider my own hc about the mask lol), but not 0%.
If First Ninja's 800 yo. spirit somehow was released from/embodied by Ninjanomicon to clash with 1500 yo Chase Young in the Modern Present:
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Here a lot of my hc come in play. I fully believe that if First - with all the developed abilities, experiences, memories, power (and possibly spirits) acquired during his stay/merge within the Ninjanomicon and from over like 200 people who ever used the mask over 800 years - fought 1500 yo Chase - who spent at least a century or 2 or 3?? hidden away in his Fortress, growing just a bit complacent, since he clearly became too strong and thus bored of the world when it couldn't offer him decent opponents anymore, at least not until current Monks - the fight could go either way.
Chase is still stupidly OP, but its clear that he was deprived of good opponents for a loooooong time, since he resorted to fight against/taunt teenagers and Omi, who is basically a kid still. And they frequently managed to outmanoeuvre him in their confrontations, if not in an actual hand-to-hand fight then at least in common sense lol.
Meanwhile First trained and learned with his each of his successors years in and out, and while we dont know exactly what sort of things happened, we can say for sure that the fighting was continuous. Ninja barely had any rest, for the Sorcerer probably attracted chaos inclined allies and minions and thus a never ending stream of enemies for Ninja to battle.
If basic bitches clash aka OG Good Chase and First Ninja before he was First Ninja:
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This is just for fun and because I fully believe that pre-Ninja Mask First will trounce Good Chase. xD
We do not know Chase's past, and there are various headcanons on how he came to be a Xiaolin Monk, but let's just say that judging by his apperance and XS voice, he is probably a very young adult-ish before he drunk his Soup, so he most likely was a Monk since at least his pre-teen/teen years. He appears to be insecure in his Monk-ness and in his abilities to become the greatest warrior despite his competence, since he was swayed/manipulated/convinced? to sell his soul to a demon for more power and freedom from Monk values.
If we judge First's appearance and voice, he would be perhaps a slight bit older than Chase when he became The Ninja, and not to mention since he was born into the Ninja Clan, he was likely trained since he was very young. His personality appears to be very studious and there is certainly a great deal of strength in his character since he not only managed to continue on with his duty even after loosing his brothers but also not succumbing to the overwhelming Power of the Mask that can corrupt those of weak belief and hold the title of the Ninja longer than anyone else.
(Not to mention I am of very biased opinion that Ninjas are cooler than Monks. lol. Also we can assume they all have magic of some sort. Like think Naruto like Ninjas and Xiaolin Elemental Dragons/Monks.)
ALSO in case 1, obviously if they fought with the agreement that if Chase wins he would ABSOLUTELY add First into his Jungle Cat harem. First will most likely add/request a stipulation that Ninja Mask was not taken with First and I can see Chase honoring that agreement, so the Ninja legacy will continue on and Chase still gets an incredible warrior to his ranks, and perhaps more warriors if the future ex-Ninjas would decide to try and fight him later on. ;)
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(first's animal form would be either a leopard or iriomote cat (both native to Japan) or a crow because tengu connection/associations ;D )
And if First wins, he certainly would figure out how to contain Chase, (perhaps even in the Ninjanomicon itself hohoho) since he somehow managed to contain a sorcerer that controls chaos with some binding, magic from a mythical beast and in a deep hole that perhaps connected to some dark realm, like??
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;)
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pinkroseblooms · 3 months
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Options, Pt.2
Arajin/f!Reader/Marito
Summary: Marito and Arajin invite you to visit Siguma headquarters for a (not) date. wc: 1.9k A/N: warning for marito being a little shit and arajin being a simp. Enjoy!
“Welcome!” Marito extends his arms wide as if awaiting an embrace. “To Siguma headquarters!”
“How…colorful.” You glance at Arajin with wide eyes; he’s standing a little behind Marito, half heartedly imitating his pose. “Thank you for having me.”
You can’t tell what the building was originally meant to be at first. It’s not until you get a good look at the dilapidated stage on the opposite side of the room and the rusted, old basketball hoops on either end of the walls that you realize it’s a gymnasium. 
“Huh.” You glance at the jungle gym lodged into the hardwood floor. “Is that from a park?”
“A daycare center!” Marito says proudly, taking you by the wrist to pull you around, pointing at the panda bear spring rider. “I thought the boys would get more use out of them than those snot nosed brats.”
“Um, would you like something to drink?” Arajin interjects meekly, holding out two bottles, one of water, another of tea. “I wasn’t sure what you wanted, so I grabbed a few different things. We have a place with snacks too if you’re hungry.”
“Thanks.” You chirp gratefully taking the chilled bottle of jasmine tea. “This is so cool Arajin, like a secret clubhouse. I always wanted to have a clubhouse as a kid; remember the time we tried to make a fortress with those old cardboard boxes?”
“Don’t remind me.”
“Hey, what’re ya talking about?” Marito leans down to get in Arajin’s face. “I’ve never heard about this. Were you trying to become a gang leader or something?”
“No! It was just an average clubhouse.” Arajin explains. “It was until the rain came anyhow. It didn’t dawn on us that leaving out cardboard in a storm would basically destroy our secret fortress.”
“I don’t know if it was secret, seeing as how we made it in the backyard.” You add good naturedly. “But it was fun to make, wasn’t it?”
“Totally.” 
Arajin smiles as you fill Marito in the details of some of your adventures; he doesn’t even mind too much when you mention Matakara, bringing up the idea of the three of you getting together sometime to hang out. There might be a way to get out of it, but the truth is, if you really wanted it, Arajin would make up an itinerary; with you there as a buffer, it could be bearable. 
“There’s no reason to be awkward Arajin: Matakara’s still the best guy I know, I think it would be nice for us to catch up at the restaurant or something.” You propose gently. “Think it over, okay? For me?”
“ANYTHING!”
You blink. “Huh?”
“I mean, yeah, I’ll cook you anything you want; I’ll make you something really good, all your favorites!” Arajin says excitedly. “I’ll even make you roast duck.”
Marito watches silently as Arajin fusses and fawns; it’s actually pretty damn cute when he gets all riled up and eager to please. He invited you to join them fully expecting this reaction; after all, whatever he says, it’s painfully obvious Arajin’s been carrying around a torch for you for who knows how long. Again, Marito expected that: in fact he was counting in it. He wants you and Arajin to get closer again before they make any moves. Besides, the two of you look like adorable puppies in a pen, so innocently affectionate and tiptoeing around each other tentatively, always mindful of the line between friends and more. 
“Ara-teen, we need to talk.” Marito interrupts the conversation with a sunny grin, now pulling Arajin away to the entrance door. “Be right back kitten! You just make yourself comfy, don’t miss us too much!”
Once they’re outside, Marito’s easy going smile switches to a cold glare; he looms over Arajin but doesn’t say anything.
“Are you mad?” Arajin glances at the slightly open doorway, even though it’s unlikely you’d overhear them. “I didn’t mean to leave you out of the conversation. We sort of got caught up reminiscing I guess.” There’s another beat of tense silence before Arajin slowly reaches for Marito’s hand at his side. “I’m sorry.”
“Why is she so dead set on getting together with you and Matakara?” Marito’s scowl dissolves into a pout but he squeezes Arajin’s hand, albeit a bit too hard, making the other boy wince. “It sounds like she thinks pretty highly of that Minato Kai scum.”
“Oh yeah that.” Arajin sighs heavily. “I don’t know. She’s been in touch with him this whole time I was away.” A look of panic crosses his face. “Wait, you don’t think they’re…dating?!”
“You’re the one who should know. Your ol’ buddy could have been working on her the past five years.” Marito muses crossly. “I sure as hell don’t want to lose out to anyone from Minato. Arajin, what’s the vibe you get from her?”
“Vibe?”
“Has she talked to you about me?”
“Not really.” Arajin tries to wrack his brain for all the instances since the first meeting between you and Marito where you might have mentioned his boyfriend. “She asks how you are, but that’s it.”
“How so?”
“I spilled the beans; she knows you’re the head of Siguma. She was worried about me getting involved with turf wars, but I told her I don’t fight anymore-”
“A shame, really.” Marito purrs, the tips of his fingers caress Arajin’s knuckles. “You throw a hell of a punch.”
“Marito, come on, not here.” Arajin glances again at the doorway, but you’re not peeking out to see what the hold up is. “Actually, she seemed scared when I told her about you.”
“I see.”
“Not like she's afraid of you!” Arajin adds hastily. “I meant she got kinda panicky when I told her about you getting into fights and stuff; I told her you’re crazy strong, but she always asks if you’re doing okay. I think she’s worried about you getting hurt.”
“She is? Worried about little ol’ me?” Marito’s razor sharp grin betrays the mock sympathetic tone of his voice. “Ara-teen, hit me.”
“Sure-what?!”
“Come on, just one good punch!” Marito undoes the rest of the buttons on his shirt until the fabric is pooled around his waist. “Give it to me.”
When Marito and Arajin finally return, they find you lying in a hammock, swinging slightly and humming to yourself. In Marito’s hammock.
“That’s my spot.”
You open your eyes; Marito’s face hovers above yours. He’s looking down at you, blocking the dim lights overhead and you can’t quite make out his expression. Carefully, you sit up, a hand to your mouth.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t think…I didn’t realize.”
“Aw, no worries. It’s just…” Marito sighs, running a hand through his hair. “My stomach’s bothering me.”
“Please, lie down!” You practically leap down and rearrange the blankets over the wide net. “Arajin has stomach problems too, I bought something for indigestion-”
“Hey, don’t go around talking about that so loudly!” Arajin looks scandalized as you forage through your purse. “It doesn’t happen that often, you don’t need to carry around medicine.”
“Good idea.” Marito gives Arajin a sneaky grin over your shoulder. “Ain’t she a peach, Ara-teen? But actually, it’s not a stomach ache; ya see…”
Marito, looking almost shy, undoes his shirt to show you the newly forming bruise on his abs.
“Oh my gosh!” You stop going through your purse to examine the fairly minor injury; still you look as upset as if Marito has an open gash across his midsection. “What happened?”
“I got into a bit of an altercation this morning and it’s still a bit tender is all.” Marito lays back on the hammock with a thoughtful expression. “I have some ointment in the cabinet over there, but I don’t think I need it.”
“Jin-san, of course you should use it!” 
Arajin watches, incredulous and a bit impressed as you march over to the cabinet, rummaging around until you find a first aid kit and the small container of ointment. Marito grins over at him smugly. “Watch and learn.” he mouths silently before you turn around with the supplies and a determined expression on your face.
“I can do it for you if it’s too painful to move; I used to help patch up Arajin and Matakara all the time when we were kids.”
“It wasn’t that often. You say it like I was getting beat up left and right.” 
“Oh hush.”
Arajin mumbles a bit defensively but he looks transfixed as you dip your fingers into the small container and begin swiping the ointment over Marito’s bruise.
“Ah!”
“Sorry, did I press too hard?”
“You’re fine,” Marito hisses sharply as you slowly trace your fingers over his stomach. “The ointment was cold; I’m a bit sensitive there.”
“I’ll be gentle.” You still look a bit upset. “I’m sorry.”
“It was just a tickle.”
“No, cause you could be resting now.” You look up at Marito and Arajin with big, sad eyes. “Is it a bad time for me to be here? I can leave.”
Arajin grabs at his chest; he feels both horribly guilty and ready to keel over and die at how adorable you look. It doesn’t help that Marito is making faint, almost keening noises as you finish applying the ointment; he’s barely able to hold back a disappointed look when you retract your hand and put the cap back over the medicine. Arajin is half expecting his boyfriend to drag you into the hammock; he’s lost count of how many times Marito has done the same to him, effortlessly pulling him into his chest, locking his long legs around his own, effectively trapping Arajin on top of his body with a smile to charm the devil himself. 
“Kitten, c’mere? Could you take a look at something?”
You stand next to Arajin, bending your head a bit to glance over Marito’s body. “What else hurts?”
“This.” Marito grabs your hand, placing the palm over his chest. “It’s aching. I think it’ll break.”
“Wha-what?”
“Don’t go yet.” Marito’s beseeching gaze flickers to Arajin’s stunned face. “We were really looking forward to you coming over. Ya can’t go now.”
“Um,” You look back at Arajin. “If it’s really no trouble…”
“Yes!” Arajin nods enthusiastically. “We even picked out special snacks and everything! Please don’t feel like you have to go!”
“Well, alright then. Thank you for having me. Jin-san?”
“Marito is fine. A friend of Ara-teen’s is a friend of mine after all.”
“Marito,” You smile softly. “Please take care of yourself properly when you get hurt: I know you’re a big tough guy and all, but that doesn’t mean I won’t worry about you as much as Arajin.”
“Yeah…sure.” Marito nods, his tone considerably less playful. “Sorry to worry you.”
“Aw, what are friends for?” You grin and poke Arajin’s cheek. “That goes for you too.”
“Yeah, yeah.” 
Arajin’s eyes lock onto Marito’s; he recognizes the look in his eyes. He’s sure it’s not so different from the longing stare he has as you walk away to the old refrigerator Arajin had dumbly pointed out when you offered to grab them water. 
“Has she always been so…?” Marito exhales slowly. “Come on man, she has to know what she’s doing.”
“Nope. Believe me,” Arajin smiles wearily. “She doesn’t have a clue.”
“Either way, if she is actually going with your buddy, you won’t have to think about competition because he’ll be dead meat.” Marito uses his free hand to reach up and pinch Arajin’s flushed cheek. “I’m all comfy and don’t wanna move; get me a kabob.”
“Okay, okay.”
“And feed me.”
“...okay.”
“Yahoo!” Marito wriggles back and forth excitedly in the hammock, apparently forgetting he’s supposed to be in pain. “I got Ara-teen and a little kitten all to myself today.”
“Just put your shirt back on.” 
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