#THIS PLACE HAS NOTHING LEFT HERE

[robyn-goodfellowe]

lost hope in a moment of need, locked down in a pattern that’s got me running round running round running round running round over and over and over and over agaaaiin

#witj my head in the sand. you know what i meant when i said it’s over and over and over and over AND. #BURNT DOWN AND IM BEREFT #THIS PLACE HAS NOTHING LEFT HERE #WE COULD RUN TOGETHER . RUN RUN RUN FOREVER #BLACK HOLES AND DYING SUNS!!! THIS WORLD IS ALL BUT DONE FOR #WE COJLD RUN TOGETHER. RUN RUN RUN FOREVER #real ones know before there was run baby run …. there was koethe 🫢 #but i always hold back posting bc i don’t want anyone to be like ? dying suns? black holes? and start shaking me by the shoulders #but i just realized now that ch13 has been out i can finally do that with minimal fear #anyways DONT EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT #i mean unless u wanna start theorizing. but i think the two strong twtt coded songs paint a scary image lol

[treasureplcnet]

bunch of bg3 sketches :)

#real time trainwreck as i booted it up for the first time at jane's place #who had convinced me to romance astarion and then i pulled gale out the stupid rock and he is my everything. #my silly rabbit.... #and tiefling w astarion is in fact jane's tav LOL #some of these are like from when i was just starting i have drawn like nothing else. this has been my life for a month #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #tav #gale dekarios #who is the guy thats featured most here.. #couples who will hyphen their surnames. LOL #not pictured here is frankie (tav)'s little brother . left alone to my own devices i will spiral out of control giving my ocs siblings #i want to do a run with her brother but considering he'd make virtually the same choices i dont think i can dedicate a playthrough LOL #my art

[lgbtlunaverse]

I have been thinking on the nature of mdzs as a deliberately vague text that leaves many things up to interpretation, and how i've slowly come to understand "up for interpretation" less as "there is One True version of this story i must find" and not even as " Everyone has a different One True Version of this story inside their head be based on their interpretations and the differences don't make one wrong and the other right" but as "There is no One True Version. Even in my own subjective interpretation of the text multiple things can be true at once" specifically, in regard to Jin Guangyao and the many things which are left up in the air as to whether he did them or not, most notably killing his son.

There's evidence for this, but it's non conclusuve (jgy saying he killed him while also saying he killed Qin Su, who very much killed herself. The speculations on how he'd have killed him being sect leader yao just saying shit. ) it is, esentially, just up in the air enough that if you decisively fall on one side of the debate is probably says more about you and your general opinion of jgy than it does about the "true" events of canon.

I have, as a proud apologist, always fallen on the "he didn't kill him but felt in some way responsible for his death." Side but recently have become more okay with the interpretation that maybe he DID kill him, and that at the very least, that when he tells Qin Su their son "needed to die" he is being genuine. Which, once you look at it beyond. "Is jgy a poor lil meow meow who it is Okay to Like or an irredeemable baby murderer" becomes both INCREDIBLY tragic and deeply interesting. Because here is a man condemned for who his parents were and who wants nothing more than to live, saying that it is possible to be so cursed by your heritage that you need to die. There is no existence for you. The exact same thing that has been said to him.

Of course being born out of wedlock to a sex worker and being a product of incest are different things, but that begs the question: where is the line? What crimes of the father can mean death for the son? How cursed can you be until your existence is so incompatible with society it is you who needs to give? And if there is... where is it? Qin su clearly thought she was past it. Was his son really past it? Is he?

#warning: canon typical incest and suicide #mdzs #mdzs meta #musings on the nature of unreliable narratives or whatever #meng yao #jin guangyao #jin rusong #i know this is a controversial take #i just think! that once you let go of the idea that killing rusong is some load-bearing sin where if jgy has done it you can't like him #that there is interesting stuff to look at here! #obviously. child murder bad. jiggy has done many had things but this one is. particularly bad. #so i get it if you feel uncomfortable with it being done character you view as symapthetic despite other bad things he's done #and again! multiple things are true at once! i STILL operate from 'he did not kill him it was a secret 3rd thing' modus 90% of the time #it's just that in this one instant i find the other option really interesting #i just. non-identity problem my beloved. if rusong's suffering cannot be erased without erasing his existence is he destined to do so? #if he'd been a teen when everything about jgy got uncovered and both his parents died is there... a place left for him to go? #i just. hhhhh this poor child. we know nothing about you beyond your shameful birth and your death. is that really all you were meant to be

[vamprlestat]

design for the track ‘fall for me’ by sleep token | whale fall | from here to eternity, caitlin doughty | midtnight mass, mike flanagan | the amber spyglass, philip pullman

#i was reading about this place will become your tomb and how they used a whale fall as the design for fall for me #and that instantly reminded me about from here to eternity #that book made me realize i want a natural burial #like just wrap me in a cloth and bury me in a hole in the ground and let nature consume me until there’s nothing left #and later that same day i rewatched episode 4 of midnight mass which has that amazing riley monologue about what happens after we die #AND THEN it got me thinking about this passage from his dark materials #that was probably the first time i came into contact with the idea of our atoms going back to the world when we die #little old 13 years old me read that and still thinks about it today #anyway #the whole idea of our bodies having a purpose in death #love that #sleep token has me constantly receiving psychic damage since i started listening to them about a month ago #sleep token #caitlin doughty #from here to eternity #midnight mass #his dark materials

[gummi-ships]

#kingdom hearts 2 #kh2 #the world that never was #scenery #my gif #i wish to know the significance of this building #yes it looks very cool but i always felt like there was more to it #it's called memory's skyscraper and we see two significant battles take place here #one with sora vs xemnas in some sort of alternate plain where there's nothing but a void while they fight at the base of this building #and one with riku vs roxas with riku fighting for sora's memories and roxas fighting in memory of xion #which has significance to the name of the building #i can't help but raise an eyebrow to how the 358/2 days novel refers to it as a facade of a buliding #what does that mean... what is this place #OH and something in ddd happened here too. sora had a distant memory of himself riku and aqua from the past #HMM.. #oh and i like how there's a truck that smashed into the side of the building and is left there still running with the lights blinking #which organization member did that

[southeast-northwest]

the concept of a best friend is so foreign yet so funny to me

ive never had a "ride or die" kind of bestie that's a trope in media, but recently I was having dinner with some friends and the concept just kinda came up.

If I were to take the phrase "best friend" literally - the person out of all my friends whom I am the closest to would fit that bill, right? but she has closer friends than me so in the most literal sense, I am not my best friend's best friend.

and i honestly am not only ok with that, but I couldn't care less. we are still good friends, and nothing can change that

#no idea why im talking about this bow #this means nothing #it means less than nothing #its 1am #and im here pondering #friendship #love #relationships #musings #idk its all a lot yk? #finishing high school has left me with a lot of thoughts and anxieties about finding my place in the world socially #im afraid of being alone #but also i have many good friends who i can rely on #ok to rb #btw

[ufolvr]

How I sleep understanding my favorite villain's personality and backstory and why they work so well while also throwing key aspects of it away for the benefit of my own indulgences btw ^_^

#📡 incoming transmission 📡 #once again talking about frieza. mostly. their backstory and direct mirroring of goku's is the strongest in the series #they never had to life a finger for anything ever and thats the point #but.... sometimes a guy has certain needs and urges #i also mess with buu and cell but thats after they died so i can do whatever. like introducing a character for them to bounce off of #is one thing but changing their backstory is another. do you see it? i dont think i need to do that to tell a meaningful story #for frieza however i do not want them 'going soft' for anyone ever. i want them to have been soft from the very beginning #that's a lot stronger to me. what if they cared? what if they cared so much. what then. #any other changes i make to characters i like esp villains is more... well. where can we go from here buddy? #and less What would happen if your backstory was a moved a little bit to the left. it just genuinely depends on what works best ^^ #self insert #selfshipping #f/o #selfship #self ship #also bc its driving me up the wall: #me whenever i tell you that frieza cannot be enjoyed separately from their femininity and poise so frieza with a square jaw means nothing #and cell was hard for me to grasp but the truth is that the more human she became the scarier she got. #like another false sense of familiarity almost #and buu is all over the place because buu is buu and makes little to no logical sense #this has nothing to do with the post. sometimes i just like to sound smart #and as a proof that i do know frieza plenty well i just love to fuck with them and make them care for someone

[sharkneto]

Why don’t you want five in school?

Oh, I've ranted about it before in the tags of THIS POST but in general it makes me wildly uncomfortable. As an adult, the thought of hypothetically being forced back to high school is the fucking pits, you could not pay me enough to do it - and I even had a good time in high school! Five is almost 60 years old and they're going to force him to go to classes and hang out with teens? That feels bad from every angle! It forces Five to act in a way he'd only do under great duress and fucks his agency and autonomy as an adult so badly. There are better, more interesting ways to play with the consequences of his physical vs actual age than sending him to goddamn high school. There's other, less dominating options for the "he looks like a kid and never actually graduated" problem.

You do you if that's your jam, don't let a random dude on the internet yuck your yum, but Five in high school is a squick for me.

#i'm not here to tell anyone to do one thing or another #or ruin anyone's fun #but it's a thing i will not engage with (except to complain because that's my right on my blog in asks asking me specifically about it) #anyway #it really just comes down to how badly it fucks five's autonomy and erases his actual identity for it to work and him to cooperate #he gets absolutely *nothing* out of the situation #he's so wildly in a different life stage and situation than anyone in high school #and forcing him to hang out there for a quick gag is a waste of the limited time we have left with him as a character in a final season #use that moment for some actual character exploration and something that actually tells us more about him #and how he deals with no powers and new universe #my personal pick is he's drinking A Lot and doing Not Much because he doesn't actually know what to do without a Goal to work towards #and passed between siblings because he can't get his own place because he Looks Like Child #the dichotomy between his physical and actual age is one of my very favorite thing to explore for five - the consequences of it for him #and this does it in a Bad Way imo #makes me feel Bad and Uncomfortable #a squick! #ask response #shark's enemy: five in high school #i have strong feelings about this thing that has a sliver of a chance of happening #but it does have that /sliver/ of a chance so i can't just dismiss it #and this is the end of shark's negativity corner now

[hawnks]

having thoughts about true bdsm couple. like……. one wants to be punished/craves release and the other craves control.

nicest people you’ll ever meet, but behind closed doors…..

#I’ve been having a lot of dreams lately about like…… love and owernership #and like Victorian style I Serve This House And Therefore I Serve You type relationships that are WAYYY more intense than the usual ones #skkdkdkdkxkd #like…… #I’ve been dreaming about this guy who is some kind of general who is on leave #and he has purchased a plot of land with an old manor in it #that has only two staff members #a cook and a house manager #and the manager has been there for forever and she’s very young to be in such a position but she’s the only one who would ever agree to #do it. there’s something wrong with the risidual magic of the place. the seasons last for just weeks instead of months so no crops will grow #so they’re alone in this infertile place with their secrets and their vulnerabilities and there’s no where to hide #and winter comes and goes four times a year #and the general becomes obsessed with the manager who he initially only thought was odd and unfortunate #nothing can live or grow here except her. he wants to cloister her away so he can admire her like a hothouse flower #he wants to tear apart anyone who would do her harm with his teeth #all grace and societal niceties vanish. what’s left is animal wanting; so intense it eclipses all else #sorry for the weird rant in the tags i am pmsing <3

[theood]

Sorry to beat the dead horse I live in lately but I'm so tired. A break from social media probably could help. If I figure out how else to occupy my time doing absolutely nothing. It's what I say every fucking day. Just wish I had friends. People my age around here to talk too. Even younger. Anything. I'm so fucking lonely. I love everyone I talk to online, I have meaningful connections with so many of you but I also haven't had meaningful conversation IRL in idk. Years probably. I haven't seen any of my old friends because we moved and I had to isolate myself because no one really wanted to hang out with me or could get here. And I really don't do anything, I can't be stressed. I can't be depressed I can't. I can't. I can't. Just like every adult in my life says. I don't know. I just wish I could actually see it's going to get better. Be better for me

#this is everything I've already said. I've never seen a future that has me in it. 4th grade cemented that fact for me. And I've been living #it since. I just don't know anymore #I missed out on so much and I'm so stupid. I am. I don't bring anything to the floor. I don't have any skills. Nothing worthwhile. Nothing #meaningful. What do I bring to the world except another useless body? Some sick animal left at the back of the pack to be killed off so #everyone else runs free. #nothing's working out for me. nothing's clicking into place. no opportunities. everyone's moving forward and I'm stuck behind. and it's #probably for the better isn't it? if I just fade out from everyone's lives. just stop. it hasn't gotten better no matter the effort I put #forward or the risks I take or anything. #one step forward five steps back and i fell and tumbled down the steps and i broke something and my stairs are icy and everyone else has ic #spikes. and their steps are an escalator. They're buckled in taken up. and mine are crumbling and overused and been here too long and it #just isn't ever going to be better is it? not for me. not ever. #generational trauma is a circle and i need to self cannibalize to end it. drink my own blood to rid myself of what isn't right. #no rebirth. no salvation. just an end. there's nothing to save.

[byronicbi]

you've heard of the media -> fanfiction -> original story pipeline, now get ready for media -> fanfiction -> fanfiction² -> fanfiction³ -> original story pipeline.

#texts. #i really wrote an AU of an AU and further AU'd it huh. #at this point there's NOTHING left of the original characters' DNA and they're my own little bastards (affectionate) now. #hey remember that one stobot AU i wrote in 2020? canon event only now it takes place in 1899 rather than the 2020s. #but also they're only here in legend and nothing more. don't worry about it. #emil has gone through so many iterations now he's sitting with the best of ivo and the worst of afton like congrats buddy #that's the worst a character has EVER been. you've traumatized them all and fucked right off to mythical status. #now your grandkid is working at knock-off radio shack and his only friends are a bunch of discombobulated middle-aged mall rats. #singularity lore tag #i am (re)building this universe as i go don't mind me.

[debbierhea]

it’s so funny to see people calling for kim’s death or punishment as if she is solely to blame for howard’s murder. the gag is that no one is wholly to blame for his death !!! no one is wholly to blame for any of it! each individual character’s actions have an effect, large or small, on everything and everyone else in the story. we as human beings are all connected whether we like it or not. and of course these are characters, not real people, and they exist in a story. but this story has been masterfully crafted by people to pose questions, to make us wonder why we feel the way we do about the things that happen. yes, there is blame to be thrown around but to what point is this blame deserved or even true? to what point is this blame fueled by our emotions? by our subjective views of justice and truth and right and wrong? how do we draw the line between us passing judgement on any one character (kim) without engaging in the exact behavior that character used, the very behavior we are condemning—building our own subjective rule book in which to view the world and dole out our own personal versions of justice?

#sure if kim had told jimmy the truth about lalo then maybe they wouldn't have gone forward with the scam and howard wouldn't have been #there when lalo came knocking. but you could argue that about LITERALLY ANY PLOT POINT #if howard hadn't tried to push kim away from jimmy maybe she wouldn't have fixated so intensely on a scam that involved his downfall #if jimmy hadn't gone into the desert kim wouldn't have confronted lalo or quit mesa verde #if chuck hadn't forced jimmy out of the sandpiper case would jimmy have lost his license? would kim have left hhm? #if nacho hadn't tried to kill hector then lalo would never have come to albuquerque #if the twins hadn't confused abuelita's car for betsy kettleman's jimmy and nacho would never have met #every single person's actions play into the outcome of last night's episode. sure there are degrees of severity and danger and harm in all #of these actions but who gets to decide? who gets to decide where the blame ultimately goes? should anyone? does it really matter? #howard is dead. and every one of our main characters has pushed a domino over whose echo has led us here #i just find it funny that the entire point of the show is to show us that nothing is as simple as placing blame wholly on one person #nothing is as simple as Right and Wrong and yet here people are acting like it is #better call saul #bcs s6

[fuckmeyer]

(Jacobsbadwig) with all due respect, when the fuck did you get back! I missed you!

never left, only reincarnated :)

#i missed you too!!!!!! how's the fanfic going???? well i hope :) #it has been a Time #my burnout & mental illness got the better of me. i intended on divorcing myself from fandom & deleting my blog #i wanted to make myself as small as possible so i could spend whatever energy i had on work and drugs #i was afraid my presence was negatively affecting the fandom at best & contributing nothing at worst #it didn't feel like there was any place for me anymore - not because of anything anyone said or did but bc #many posts i made i no longer agreed w/ & bc i was too burnt out to write new theories i figured no one would notice or care i was gone #so i got super drunk and deleted everything #people contacted me about my blog but i was too anxious to reply #bc i didn't want to admit i had made a mistake #i kept the handle in case i ever wanted to post #but for a long time i had nothing to say about twilight outside of what my fanfiction had to say about it #i lurked for a while & at the end of the day i missed the community that came with participating in fandom #really tho - what helped was quitting my crushing job and taking several months to travel around the pacific northwest #(burnout is REAL!!!!!!) #and the admin of the twilight Discord server recognizing my handle & taking the time to talk to me - which was very sweet of them #plus - i am rereading Eclipse for the fanfic rewrite and began to have Thoughts #tbh i've been finding it amazing that anyone ever noticed i left or remembered my handle! im kinda blown away #anyway here's all the information you never asked for LMAO #i am happy to be back in the circle :) #cheers to you #<3

[47-protons]

god give me the strength to not be a petty bitch over something that happened in august (it is 3am. the strength is needed)

#am i bitter. of course. it hurt my feelings hella hard and has left me feeling insecure and slapping a fucking /lh tone tag on the end of a #message does NOT change that. #sorry. i'm normal. (< BITTER.) #'' be normal about foreigners challenge'' bites you maims you beats you to death with a rock #''be normal '' i said. in the general chat that i wanted to say hello to them. i wanted to say HI #i wanted to say fucking HELLO bc i was curious. why they were here??? bc there's NOTHING to do in this fucking state??? #are you guys just passing through are you having a good time where are you going??? if you're staying here what are you doing??? #sorry for being curious and wanting to say hello to people GOD what should i have done instead D. killed myself in front of them to atone #for the sin of being an american and curious because i feel the same curiosity whenever i see a license plate from fuckin IOWA #ANYTIME i see a license plate from a state that is not an IMMEDIATE neighbor (Missouri/Oklahoma/Colorado/Nebraska) it's just ??? why are yo #HERE of all places. #this was not a ''be normal about foreigners'' this was just an extension of ''why are people HERE there's nothing to DO'' #i'm still BITTER about it because OF COURSE I AM i'm just CONFUSED over that stance #fuckin. ''yeah don't say hi''

[unproduciblesmackdown]

truly further [2 sides same coin] of billions tragic failing of either quant's writing that the effective Demand that taylor & rian must have a very special dynamic is all about going "well i'm epic & you're epic" at every stage, which is nothing, while winston and taylor can never have a dynamic b/c he's so Not Epic, despite that he's more similar to taylor in any ways that actually matter or could mean anything, while also if rian was ever peers with winston / had a reciprocal dynamic there, maybe we'd Have to have had more of an actual character from that role, but instead once again [no] b/c he's so Not Epic. billions writing getting an award for [okay. tmc trifecta] as the only option heading into s6 & giving us Nothing instead

#fr the one arc left is winston being sick of it like alright i'm outta here #wherein it's time apparently for rian to draw on the apparent nonzero affection she thinks she has for all that that means anything.... #and oops it did nothing; she may as well have Again jumped in & volunteered info herself in the first place #and tbt rian could be indignant on lauren's behalf based on like 3 days of distant technical half coworkership #but Nothing re: taylor's participation in treating winston like that. nothing re: rian either. but you see....lauren was also epic #winston billions #when you're both Epic you're on the defensive about why you Don't date. except for when you're not! #like again so wendy thinks she & taylor were peers? why did They not have to explain why They didn't date? wendy being that cishet abt it? #we can't get an explanation for why rian would fuck That old man; just why it wasn't otherwise taylor specifically #this being the ''well it's how i'm So thoughtful abt things. & it's how i'm So Unthoughtful abt things'' In The Same Breath #like yeah yeah you dropped all pretense of [character: rian] for [young woman: inherently sexually available] like amazing #it was always like jesus christ but just increasingly dismal experience surveying the mess of nothingness & insults that was like. #again the Nothingness that was rian & pick your poison re: analyzing Power whether it's the ungodly thread of banging prince #or her casually being this general bully + personal abuser to her ''friend'' / coworker there & this is Completely Neutral to billions #perhaps Good! & there's just nothing else to the character. having her Not Leave also just further whittling away any sense of anything #again it's just like depressing lmao gotta get out of here #and as per usual the way that ripping off winston's character from getting to have focus; material; arcs; relationships etc just #impacts these other characters negatively too. rian's main traits having to be ''loves being a bully'' & ''presumed to have a vagina'' wow #billions doesn't even know abt the former which just makes it all the more amazing. taylor having ''nobody'' to talk to but rian for half #a season like WINSTON!! he was half their employees at that time & billions is still That resolute abt The Epics Vs The Losers #and being a Thee Epic is like [there's nothing there] like that was Really supposed to be rian's whole character & [there's nothing there] #the substance not in taylor going ''who's Epic like me'' but in who's Actually inherently intractibly offbeat & different & Knows This #embraces it works with it Has to embrace and work with it; suffers for it but thrives for it; is this secret weapon for it; can work w/You. #all the ways taylor had to water down talking abt themself to like wendy or axe or whomever tf....winston is right here #he's Understanding them & talking abt Them unprompted unguided just Getting It & Caring; doing 9000% better than these other Epic ppl.... #lord. it's just amazing they were really this committed to like well yeah the real binary that really matters. the cools & the nerds #they really were like oh we love winston sm....we Love to write 3x03 endlessly where he gets shitted on & we have so much fun seeing that #we could've at least had the Consequences of [winston deserved to throw hands] like fr. rian; taylor; wags; dollar bill; wags again

[bees-with-swords]

Joining a Discord server with too many channels is like walking into a mcmansion, I swear. Half the rooms are full of dust sheets and the family has just been shouting at each other from across the house for the past year.

#I see multiple channels that haven't been touched in months and I'm like. you live here? #you need this much space?? #genuinely the servers with like 200 people and 70 channels are! scary!! #downgrade to a cottage! make it cozy! #if your members can't coexist with each other and can only stand to parallel play in different channels #maybe you need to ask some questions about the nature of the community you're fostering. #nothing against parallel play! #but when it's the only thing left #and your community has died down a bit #why do you still have different channels for every topic under the sun #downsize! #it's always better to feel a bit too cramped in a little cottage than feel like you're exploring an abandoned mall #'second general chat' has killed more servers than I can count #theres a reason you only have one living room if your family is small! #the internet 'discomfort with being unable to talk about exactly what you want whenever you want' is such a problem #you literally can't socialise or make friends unless you join in on conversations you aren't super interested in #please stop sitting next to each other and shouting into the void #the point is talking... to EACH OTHER #walking into the living room and being an active listener. laughing at someones jokes #lying around sleepover style and letting the conversation take you places #like I struggle with not changing the conversation completely to something else #but you gotta FIGHT that #it's the gremlin in your brain that doesn't like being bad at things #it doesn't want to have a conversation it isn't in control of. because of social anxiety #but you CAN'T be in control #conversations are COOPERATIVE. they're RECIPROCAL #and it SUCKS but it's life