#Seungmin Fanfiction

[starseungs]

take a shot. ksm.

kim seungmin x fem!reader — it really shouldn't take a genius to figure out that you and your co-star didn't get along. you knew kim seungmin. you knew how life functioned despite the cameras. and you knew that it was harder to keep a good shot hidden than it was to delete a bad one.

genre/s — drama, angst, fluff, a sprinkle of comedy, actors au, enemies to lovers, slowburn • 19.4k words

warning/s — y/n gets referred to with she/her pronouns, profanity, implied death taken lightly (humor purposes), miscommunication to too much communication, y/n easily gets into a bad headspace, inaccurate depictions of filming a movie, the angst is strong = the fluff is strong, other idols are mentioned as characters along with skz members, mentions of alcohol in a scene

note — my longest fic yet !! it also took me so long to finish this (like three weeks i believe) and there were some struggles that happened in the making of this, but it turned out to be my most favorite work ive done ever. thank you for the people who patiently waited for this since the teaser, and remember that reblogs & feedbacks are greatly appreciated 🫶 i hope you enjoy the read !!

2024 ⓒ starseungs on tumblr. do not steal, repost, or edit.

00 : ZERO.

“I’m sorry, what?”

The car remained silent despite your words of confusion. You felt as though your world had come to an extreme halt, giving you a whiplash as the buzz of the road outside continued to pierce through your ears. There was nothing else to keep your mind away from the absolute bomb of news that was just given to you; your manager had turned it down before uttering the horrid sentence that brought your untimely demise.

The car may have kept on with its task of moving forward—but you were stuck frozen in place.

“You’re joking.”

Your world fell on seemingly deaf ears. The man up front, steering the wheel, rendered himself mute to your growing distress, finding the busy traffic of city life interesting enough to keep his eyes glued. But the urban chaos didn’t distract you one bit from brewing a storm of gunpowder inside your throat.

And just like that, a ghost of a click was heard.

“No—please tell me you’re joking,” you voiced out, tone betraying your attempts at keeping things respectful. It soon came to your attention that the effort was of no use, as your manager still chose to keep his peace. “Changbin!”

The car swiveled a bit off-lane for a second before returning to its correct course. Normally, such an abrupt action by a vehicle would concern you, as you would argue that you were still much too young to suffer at the hands of a road accident, but no such thoughts even made their way into your brain. Just like how time had stopped for you, there was no time for debating over survival either. One life-or-death situation was already enough for you.

You wanted answers, and you were going to get them.

Changbin exhaled audibly from the scare he just put both of you through. His hands shook with a slight tremor, and that was all it took for him to decide that pulling over to the nearest parking area was for the best.

“Don’t yell in the car like that!” You scoffed at his scolding, finding the whole situation ironic.

“Oh, so you can do it all the time, but I can’t?” You shot back. Changbin sighed tiredly, finally registering the extent of your agitation. "Plus, I have a perfectly good reason why I’m yelling!”

“Listen, Y/N, it’s really not that bad—”

“Yes, it is that bad!” The words spill out of your mouth in utter disbelief at his attempts at assurance. “I’m working with Kim Seungmin, of all people!”

“And that’s why it’d be fine!” Changbin argued, running a hand through his already tousled hair. You blinked at his reply, baffled by the sheer implication.

“—How?”

Changbin clicked his tongue at the question, finding it hard to digest just why you were so against working with the mentioned actor. With the mere sound of that actor’s name spat out of your mouth, one would think that he had somehow managed to offend your entire bloodline. But that kind of bitterness could only be achieved through a sour history, so you really couldn’t empathize with your manager’s mindset either.

Even you knew that this movie would be enormously successful from the director alone. Director Han Jisung’s influence and presence in the industry were not a laughing matter—in fact, you should already be trembling in anxiety just knowing that you snagged probably the biggest role you’d ever get in your whole career. He was only around the same age as you, but the winding list of his achievements was already one for the records. And yet, here you were rethinking your contract with him even before the project started.

Just because of who you were going to be acting alongside with.

“Seungmin is a nice person,” Changbin explained gently like he was coaxing a child, intentionally ignoring the way your face scrunched up at what he said. “I did my research, ok? Everyone only has high praises for him, both on and off-set. Isn’t that enough to be trusted?”

You bit your tongue to stop yourself from digging a deeper hole to lie in. The answer was no—it wasn’t enough to be trusted. Now, at this point, someone would’ve had half a mind to ask why you were so sure about your vendetta against the man. If a person was so well loved in a world where cameras were pointed at them in every waking minute, then shouldn’t all the dirt be found by now, if there was any?

To that, your answer would be yet another no.

Because you knew Kim Seungmin. You knew how life functioned despite the cameras. And you knew that it was harder to keep a good shot hidden than it was to delete a bad one.

“Turn the car around.”

Changbin’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets at your demand. Surely, he had heard you now. You crossed your arms and leaned back to rest comfortably on the car seat, turning your head to face the window and glare at the world outside, continuing on with their lives like a well-followed routine.

“Y/N, this is a big opportunity—”

“I said, turn the car around. I’m not attending this cursed table reading.” You pinched the bridge of your nose to keep the incoming migraine at bay.

“You really think I’ll willingly step into a room with the devil’s incarnate? I’d rather get shot—”

01 : ONE.

“—sensing a great shot!”

Director Han Jisung nodded positively at your performance, satisfied with your initial portrayal of the female lead.

“If we keep going like this, then I’m expecting this project to be a big hit. The casting team really did their pay’s worth on this one,” the young director hummed. “Especially you, Actor Kim Seungmin. I don’t know how they managed to get through your company's walls, but I’m glad they did. You’re perfect for the role!”

You felt your eye twitch as the figure bearing the name appeared within your vision. His mouth curled up into an arrogant smirk, hastily covered up by a bashful smile. You cringed at his actions that only you seemed to see. Why was this prick acting all humble?

“Ah, I always wanted to act in one of your films, Director Han. This is more of an amazing opportunity for me than you, honestly.”

That smoothed honey voice wrapped itself around the room’s premise, charming everyone around like it was coming from an alluring siren. All except you.

Your mouth filled with a coating of spite as his next sentence echoed through your ears. His eyes locked you in as a target, a wordless challenge shooting straight at your own.

“Plus, seeing who my co-star is, I’m quite thrilled to see the end product,” Seungmin grinned with a manic glint.

Fuck. You should’ve turned that damned car around yourself. Maybe then you’d be enjoying a relaxing time in the tub, surrounded by bubbling suds of fragrant soap, instead of being a frontliner in this mental war your acting counterpart seemed to subject yourselves to. Now, you had to withstand the feeling of your body instantly going on auto-pilot after his words.

It was commendable, really—how Seungmin could take over a space of this size filled with various types of people so easily. He had major talent in that field, which greatly accentuated his acting power. Seungmin had a way with words, and while you would never be caught praising him out loud, you couldn’t help but acknowledge the bitter truth deep inside the darkest parts of your brain. It was almost obsessive, the way your mind zeroed in on his presence. Even as you let the busy table chatter away into a buzzing noise that barely made its way coherently through your ears, your eyes stayed glued to the figure in front of you, carefully studying his mannerisms as he enthusiastically interacted with everyone. You weren’t someone who Seungmin’s charms would work on—instead, you felt like prey, waiting to be pounced on any second now.

Before you knew it, the table reading came to a close. You could faintly remember standing and packing your things quietly, more focused on the sudden stinging feeling you felt coming from your eyes, already threatening to water. “This is ridiculous,” you huffed in frustration. Why did you feel the need to cry like a child at this very moment?

“With the way your script is being shoved in that tiny bag, yeah, I would say that too.”

“Leave me alone, Kim.”

You hear him chuckle, causing your grip on your leather bag’s opening to become tighter, feeling the metal zipper bite at your palm. “There’s a lot of Kims here, Y/N. Be careful now; they might mistake you for being rude to them,” he chirps. Fucking chirps. Like a small bird who deserves to be doted on. Except the man before you was neither small nor deserved to be doted on—Kim Seungmin would never be described in any of those words in your world.

“Right. Since they’re also talking to me right now,” you scoffed back. Thankfully, that seemed to keep the tears at bay for now. You refused to break down in front of the most infuriating man in your life.

“Still stuck up as ever,” he sighs. Your eyes almost popped out of their sockets at his comment. You? Stuck up? If anything, that would be him! “This would be our first piece together after that charity drama our acting academy did way back a few years ago, so would it kill you to be civil?”

Ah. There it was. The infamous acting academy.

JYP Academy of Theatrics was admittedly one of the most successful acting academies in the country, known for producing many big name acts throughout its years of operation. Every aspiring actor has probably gone through the phase of wanting to be part of the academy’s carefully limited population of trainees—you included.

You remember the first time you brought up your plans on becoming an actress to your parents; their apprehensive faces telling you to try going to an acting academy first before giving up everything and running towards your dream blind. Young you didn’t realize the underlying implication that your parents were expecting you to be discouraged and give up on your thoughts of becoming an actress for good. Instead, you aimed high with the thoughts of their support, confidently applying for JYP Academy.

To your parents’ surprise, you passed both rounds of the screening, becoming a full-fledged acting academy trainee at one of the most prestigious places for it. It was also where you met the thorn in your life that was standing before you at the present.

“And frankly, I’m looking forward to this. So can we not ruin the mood on set?” He had the nerve to add. That was all you needed for your last string of restraint to snap.

“Why? So you could enjoy the power trip of watching me fumble around like a headless chicken after getting scolded a thousand times for my horrible acting skills?”

“What?”

You watched as Seungmin’s face morphed from exhaustion into a look of confusion at what you had just said. However, you knew better than to give him the benefit of the doubt—so you continued to shoot your bullets at him.

“I know you, Kim Seungmin,” you motioned towards him. “Don’t you dare think I’ve forgotten your days at the acting academy, especially that damned charity drama. But consider yourself lucky, since I won’t drag your ass down this time, Golden Boy. In fact, watch me shine on set even if it’s against your will or whatever is going on in that ego of yours, because I refuse to bow down to you. Things may have been different seven years ago, but I’ve grown since then. So if you want to prove to me that you have to, then know how to keep your mouth to yourself around me.”

After your little round of firing the pent-up rage inside of you, you snatched your bag from the table and stormed out of the room without another word. You had half the mind to worry if anyone had heard your little squabble with Seungmin, but you were already too far down the hall to go back and check, risking a blow to your conscience if ever you tried to go back. You only had the fact that you had managed to keep your voice surprisingly low throughout the whole exchange to console you.

With this, you continued your trek towards the parking lot to meet your manager once again—blissfully unaware of the state in which you left your co-star back in the room.

“What the fuck just happened?”

It took everything in Seungmin to not march after you and demand an explanation for what you had just said to him. In all honesty, Seungmin was baffled. Out of all the possible scenarios he had imagined to happen when meeting you, this was definitely not one of them. Sure, you two weren’t exactly the best of friends way back in your academy years, but he had at least considered you an acquaintance.

Even then, he didn’t remember your relationship being this bad. For all the times the both of you clashed heads, he couldn’t recall a single time serious bad blood was developed. The memory of you laughing joyfully as he messed up a line in your shared scene together on a monthly evaluation was still fresh in his memories—so just where did this hostility come from? If he were to base his conclusion off your words earlier, then it must have something to do with the charity drama, and that only made Seungmin more lost.

What you said earlier did hold some truth to them—you were scolded a lot by their advisor, slash project director, but in no way did you do badly in the production. Seungmin could testify to that. After all, he was witness to the amount of praise you got from fellow trainees as they watched you act out your scenes on camera, even though his younger counterpart was jealous of all the positive feedback. So now, he really couldn’t understand where your deep-rooted bitterness towards him came from. He even gave you some tips during the times you seemingly struggled with their advisor’s vision!

“Seungmin?”

He turned over to where his name was just called, seeing his manager approach him while bowing politely towards the small number of production staff left in the room. “Oh, did I take too long, Minho?”

“Yeah, but it’s alright. I knew you were going to catch up with a friend,” Minho looked around for a bit before continuing, “Speaking of which, did she go already?” Seungmin couldn’t stop himself from clicking his tongue at his manager’s words.

“It’s a long story.”

Well, two can play that game. If you truly knew him like you said you did, then you would know that Kim Seungmin isn’t one to give up when he sets his mind to something.

02 : TWO.

You wanted to give up right at this very moment.

Today was the first day of filming for the movie you were cast in as the female lead, yet here you were, one push away from having a mental breakdown. It was your first lead role—one that you had wished on countless stars to get ever since signing a contract with your current agency. Yet, now that you actually have it, you were left unsure of whether your acting could do proper justice to the character given to you. The confidence you flared towards Kim Seungmin a few days ago was nowhere to be found right now as anxious thoughts swirled through your head instead.

When you first read the script as one of your manager’s proposals for your next project, you instantly felt like the female lead’s role spoke to you the most. The plot itself was a masterpiece, clearly right up Director Han’s alley with its sentimental undertone and themes of self-discovery. It followed the male lead, returning back to his hometown for a high school reunion after just deciding to quit his job at a well-known corporation in the city. At the reunion, he meets the female lead, whom he remembers having the biggest crush on back in his teenage years—before he moved to the city for college.

In comparison, the female lead never left their homey countryside town. She attended the nearby community college and also settled her adult life in the same area. However, that didn’t mean that what she had achieved was all she wanted to do in life. Like everyone else, she too, had her own dreams. Unfortunately, she lacked confidence in herself to chase opportunities and got stuck right where her starting line was.

And in a way, she spoke to you.

You didn’t want to admit it, but perhaps you regret running your mouth like that at your co-star during the table read. It was a moment of weakness, you tried to tell yourself. Emotional you talked too big for what you could handle, so now you were left here to deal with the consequences of your actions.

But lies had their truths too.

It was true that you wanted to shine on set—outshining Kim Seungmin was just an added bonus to the thought. You’ve spent far too long in others’ shadows, never really feeling like you had the chance to show your fullest potential. That was something you fought for constantly, starting from your days at the academy up until the present, only to have no such luck. Maybe that was why you developed a habit of becoming pessimistic at the worst times, becoming your own enemy as you fall into a pit of self-sabotage, effectively going against everything you’ve ever wished for yourself. It was a cycle of keeping yourself confused with your own decisions, and it was a frustrating process.

You could only stare from the actors’ corner on the site as you watched the crew members run around making final arrangements for today’s shoot. Normally, you wouldn’t have seen this part of the process, as actors would often arrive later on when everything was nearly set, during their actual call time. You just intentionally went early, deciding that you weren’t going to get any more sleep even if you tried, seeing as most of the previous night was spent trying to make sure you had your lines all perfected. Sleep came rough yesterday, and you had no one else to blame but your own nerves.

At least the set looked great—today you were filming all the scenes needed for the high school reunion. The place was this quaint function hall in a small town about seven hours from the capital city, the same town you would be staying in to shoot for a little less than a week. You couldn’t help but think that maybe the new environment contributed more towards your slowly diminishing confidence, feeling yourself too far away from the strong presence of individualistic urban life. A defeated sigh was all you could do in attempt to ease yourself, even the slightest.

“I’m beginning to think this is going to become a pattern,” you hear a familiar toned voice comment. “Meeting you distressed, I mean.”

You spare the figure a half-hearted glance before rolling your eyes, forcing out an appropriate greeting. Or what was appropriate in your books, anyway.

“Oh, it’s you.”

Seungmin’s face displayed his feelings of amusement, which in turn made your frown deepen. “Not even a good afternoon? That’s harsh of you, Y/N,” he says in a tone made for mockery. “You really don’t like seeing my face, huh?”

“More like, I just don’t like you, period,” you grumbled in annoyance. “Also, why are you even here this early?”

Your surprise at his punctuality was real; you were not expecting to see him on set three hours early. But maybe you should have foreseen this behavior, seeing as the Seungmin you knew back then was also one to be on time during all lessons, activities, and practices. A part of you was then thankful for the question coming off as general because if you added any more comparisons, it would’ve seemed like you held on to too much information on him from the past.

“Just because I’m the main character doesn’t mean I should be fashionably late. Would it tick you off to know that I like being punctual with things?”

“Yeah,” was your immediate reply, not needing to think about it any further. “Since now, I have to time myself to arrive just before the call time.”

Seungmin lets out a deep sigh at your words. “You don’t want to spend any more time with me than necessary, got it.” He says, then lifting a finger up to tap against his ear. “But you know, you should really learn to keep your plans away from enemy ears.”

You tried your best not to show the inner war that just sparked inside of your head—you really shouldn’t have found that small gesture attractive, but the romantic side in you swooned so easily against your will. And for what? Kim Seungmin, of all people? You really should tone down all the enemies-to-lovers content you were consuming, because this was the last thing you wanted to happen. Real life just doesn’t play out like that.

Giving him some slack and perhaps a half-assed attempt at reverse psychology, you replied with a tired tone. “I’ll agree with you on that one, so you may walk away now, Kim.”

Except that Seungmin didn’t seem to catch the memo.

“Says the one who keeps talking,” he snarks at you. “For someone who told me to keep my mouth to myself around you, you’re the one who keeps the conversation flowing.”

You rolled your eyes for the second time since starting this conversation. At this point, you were convinced that Kim Seungmin was on a mission to dislocate it. “You just have to win everything, do you?”

“It’s my charm, I suppose.”

“And I disagree. The only charm you have is that mouth of yours you use to manipulate everyone around you.”

That seemed to snap something within Seungmin. “What the hell did I ever do to you?” He spits out furiously. “I would’ve already sued you for defamation if you acted like this around everyone else, so you should be thankful that I’m being tolerant of your attitude right now.”

“Thankful? Why would I be thankful?” Was your baffled response. “You know, I’m starting to believe that you don’t remember what you put me through all those years ago at all, and it’s only making me more upset that you seem to hold no remorse whatsoever.”

“If it’s that bad, then go ahead and tell me!” Seungmin hissed in an attempt to keep his voice down and not cause a scene. “I don’t have time for this roundabout game you have going on, and honestly, neither should you. We have a high-profile movie to film, and I would never let whatever this is ruin the hard work of a hundred people—so get your head out of your ass and either clench your teeth and save the working environment we have or be a dear and solve this issue with me right now.”

Now you were just barely containing your rage. It was at this point that you realized that Seungmin wasn’t faking anything; and that made it sting a lot more in your already scarred heart. Of course, someone like him wouldn’t understand why you were acting like this. Someone like him, born talented enough to be loved and praised by everyone, would never see the other side that you had to be dragged through—the side that existed all because of people like him, too.

“Fuck you, Kim Seungmin,” you croaked out through tears. “I knew someone like you would never understand.”

And you ran.

“What are—Y/N! Come back here!”

03 : THREE.

“Y/N, where in the world even are you? You need to come back to the actors’ tent right now!”

Changbin’s voice boomed through your phone’s speaker a lot louder than usual, causing you to jerk it away from your ear in pain. Well, you did deserve the scolding—after running off to God knows where in a relatively remote town you didn’t even know, you would be pissed as hell too if you were your manager. What kind of actress just leaves the set without a single thought like that?

“I swear, Y/N. Do not tell me you’re lost because I’m pretty sure I left you somewhere safe the last time I saw you,” you hear Changbin huff on the opposite end. “I can’t believe you told me that you were going to be fine on your own, and I actually trusted you. That’s it! I’m not letting you wander around the set anymore from this point onwards!”

You couldn’t help but find your manager’s rant funny, despite the clear threat being held above your head. “Really? I’m telling you that it’s almost call time, and you’re just laughing. Fine, go on your own soul-searching, or whatever it is you’re doing. I’m telling everyone you left your role to go play hooky—”

Oh, you could only wish. After your little squabble with Seungmin, playing hooky didn’t sound like a bad option. Sadly, you still had a conscience that weighed on you—even more hypersensitive to the people around it with your co-star’s earlier comment of ruining other people’s hard work. You hurriedly shook your head to get rid of the negative thoughts that were starting to plague your head once again, and instead focused on the group of trees that lined the path towards the entrance of the function hall.

“Changbin, I’m fine.”

“Damn right, you should be!” He screeches one last time before calming down. “But in all seriousness, you need to head over here now, or Director Han is going to chew me a new one. He knows my sister, and I don’t want to be berated for not doing my job properly by her of all people.”

You chuckled at the competitiveness in his voice. “Don’t worry, I just took a short walk for fresh air. You know how nervous I was earlier on the way to the set.” Changbin hummed in acknowledgement.

“And on the way to this town in general,” he teases. It didn’t last long, though, since he immediately followed up on your well-being with a soft tone. “Did the walk help? I can get you some hot tea too, if you want.”

“Look at you, finally being a proper manager,” you threw back at him, snickering as offended noises started to pour out of your phone. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll take you up on that tea offer. Plus, I’m just around the corner now.”

Once you saw his figure coming into view, you hung up the call and opted to wave your right arm to catch his attention. Changbin broke out into a frantic sprint towards you the minute he saw you approaching.

“Oh, thank whatever deity there is. You need to head over to the tent right now and—” He suddenly stopped mid-sentence, holding you still at arms length to give you a look of confusion as he scanned your face. “Did you cry? Why are your eyes like that?”

Shoot. You had totally forgotten about that for a second. “Ah,” was all you could muster in a sheepish daze. “It was just to let the nerves out, you know? It’s nothing serious.”

Changbin narrowed his eyes at your excuse, making you hold your breath unintentionally. It felt as though you were being picked apart, trying to find the truth that you desperately wanted to keep hidden. Eventually, the man before you decided to let it be, sending you off with an exhausted wave.

“Hm. Alright, and it’s already going away, so it must’ve just been a light session. Try to blink it out more so that it’s long gone once you step in front of the cameras.”

You silently breathed out a sigh of relief. “Will do. Thanks, Changbin.”

“Stop being a sap and head over to the tent already,” he chuckles before sending you a comforting smile. “Good luck. I’ll just be here.”

A grateful look found its way onto your face as you walked briskly towards the actors’ tent. You should really treat Changbin to dinner after all of this is over, you think to yourself, putting on your game face and entering the enclosed area with a newly steeled heart.

Now, Seungmin wasn’t the type to be overly concerned with others’ business. While he wouldn’t exactly call himself an extreme individualist, he still did have an appreciation for community. You wouldn’t catch him dead in the act of trying to mingle with someone else’s issues if it had nothing to do with him. However, all that seemed to somehow fly out the window whenever it had something to do with you.

To him, you were a person qualified enough to be considered intertwined with his own life. Sure, he hadn’t seen you in person for years, but that still would never be able to erase the fact that you knew him behind the cameras. Actually, even worse.

You knew the person he was before he even took up acting as a career.

Perhaps that was why he was so bothered by the way you were acting with him recently. He doesn’t even recall ever being that hostile to someone since his high school days, and that alone terrified him. It was like he regressed back to the days of his youth whenever he interacted with you—and that did more harm than good. The younger him was full of teen angst that he wanted to bury deep inside the confines of his past, but the animosity you seemed to harbor personally against him made him wonder if he was truly missing important information from that era of you both.

So when he saw you walk into the tent with fading redness evident in your eyes, just right after your small fight with him earlier, he instantly felt a punch in his gut. In all honesty, he wasn’t aiming to make you cry—it just so happened that the spur of the moment was so intense that he spat out things he barely meant. Sure, they still stemmed from the truth of how he felt since he did want to make amends with you, but even he wants to kick himself for the way he worded things so out of pocket. His reaction to the situation was so childish that it would be easier to think he finally went insane from the busy schedules he’s been doing than believe that what he did was a conscious decision. He was supposed to be the mature one at that moment, reaching out to fix the issue.

And yet here he was, feeling like a child in front of you.

He wanted to approach you, apologize for earlier, and maybe another one for whatever stupidity his old self did that was clearly bad enough for his mind to completely block out entirely. If you were reacting this much, it had to be at least somewhat of a traumatizing experience. Seungmin doesn’t think he ever got that bad back then, but everyone had different perspectives—and yes, young him had a tendency to be a prick. He still had friends, though, and no one ever called him in to discuss his behavior, so it wasn’t like he was a bully.

Either way, he felt the need to apologize—and maybe get an apology back, but his legs wouldn’t let him. A part of him knew that if he did approach you at the moment, you might run away again, and it was almost time for the briefing. Instead, he settled on looking at you across the pop-up room, hoping that his silent sentiment was delivered.

Which it was not. At all.

If anything, it added more pressure to whatever nerves you were holding back. Seungmin’s gaze was so piercing to the point that you didn’t even need to turn and look to know that he had his eyes locked on you. What does he want from you now? Oh, right—you two would be filming your scenes together in a matter of about an hour or two. Maybe this was Seungmin’s way of telling you to get your shit together while finally respecting your wishes to be left alone. Improvement is improvement, so you’d leave him alone to do his thing too.

“All right, is everyone here?” A lean man in his mid-twenties walked in, asking everyone inside. There was another person following him, yet seemingly younger. “It seems so. If someone you know is late, just fill them in with the details later.”

The first man lifted up a thick bind of paper, which you quickly recognized as the script. “I’m sure everyone has read their copy of this. My name is Hwang Hyunjin, and I’m the head scriptwriter for this film. Over here to my side is Yang Jeongin, my assistant. We’re here to give you a briefing on how this shoot will go for today since Director Han and Assistant Director Lee are busy with the filming crew as of the moment.”

So they were the ones behind the script. You felt your excitement levels increase as various questions about the story’s making filled your head—but you would save that for another day. Perhaps during the crew dinner after the movie’s filming was completed.

“Today, we’ll be filming one of the first scenes in the movie—the reunion. That’s why there’s a lot of you are here right now, despite the story only really having a few recurring characters. Still, whatever your role is, I hope you take this opportunity with pride. All of you here will be treated as actors for as long as you stand on this set, so have the dignity of one. Whether you have lines or not, what I expect from all of you is your best, and only your best,” Head Scriptwriter Hwang emphasized.

The briefing continued on with the necessary information for the reunion scene, with detailed clarifications and stage directions. If you weren’t locked in on all the information being fed to you, you would’ve had half the mind to acknowledge how strikingly handsome the man was upfront. A few others did, though, and you couldn’t really blame them. The guy could be an actor himself if he wanted to be.

“And I believe that’s all for now,” Head Scriptwriter Hwang clapped his hands in satisfaction. “Hair and makeup will take care of you all for about an hour and a half. I see that some of you already came prepared, so go ahead and touch up yourself if you want to. Main characters, you have your own booths,” he glances towards the stations at the end of the tent.

“You’ll be called up when needed. Actor Kim Seungmin, please get ready first since we need you for the entrance shots. That is all. Good luck.”

Head Scriptwriter Hwang bows politely to all of you before exiting the tent with Assistant Yang. With that, the battlefield begins.

You couldn’t remember much of what was happening other than you being sat down in front of a well-lit mirror and letting yourself become a doll in the hands of the make-up artists. The one assigned to your hair did start a short conversation about your previous works, to which you could only thank her shyly for her support. While you weren’t the most popular actress out there, you were still relatively well-known, with notable works under your belt. Seven years of experience wasn’t something someone could just laugh at, after all.

On the other hand, your co-star was a famous A-lister who was most likely getting paid significantly more than you for his role in this film. You glanced a bit to your right, where Kim Seungmin was happily chatting with his hair and makeup assignees, his voice effortlessly traveling its way over to your spot.

Ever the social butterfly, that one.

“Are you excited?” The woman assigned to your hair, who you learned was named Eunha, asked. You looked at her, startled by the sudden topic change. “Sorry—it’s just that you kept looking over at Actor Kim that it came to mind. He is quite the looker, isn’t he?”

“Oh.”

How should you even respond to that? It wasn’t like you could just go around advertising your personal beef with the man when, as far as you knew, he had a clean record on his plate. That would just be a lawsuit waiting to happen. You’d have to settle for something vague instead. “I guess,” you cringe at the evident pain in your voice.

“I’ve heard from others in the industry that he’s a great guy. You’ll have a blast filming this movie with him. I know it’s a bit awkward right now, but I’m sure you’ll warm up to him soon. After all, you’re both the lead roles.”

You’ll surely have a blast, alright—straight to the ego.

This conversation just gave you the unfriendly reminder that you had to act all lovey-dovey with this man, and if anything, it was triggering some unpleasant memories. By memories, you meant the charity drama from your acting academy days.

Your experience with that project was interesting, to say the least.

It had all started with Seungmin winning the prize of being the drama’s male lead after getting the top spot on the year-end evaluation for the junior level. Along with his prize came the privilege to choose who he would be acting alongside, only to surprise everyone when he chose you, a trainee who barely got recognition and wasn’t even in the top ten of your level. At first, you felt honored. It was like you were finally getting acknowledged, and by the top performer, no less. So you worked hard to do your part properly, wanting to repay Seungmin for his act of kindness; only for that kindness to turn out to be a mockery of you.

The difference in skill between you two was just too wide. Your shortcomings showed far too much, and your mistakes ended up being emphasized to the point that your level advisor became endlessly frustrated with you. First, it was the scolding. The woman clearly did not appreciate you holding back the entire production, especially since it was for a cause, so she would point out every problem in your acting, which quickly took a turn after you showed barely any improvement. Eventually, your advisor started to berate you—going as far as constantly referring to you as the reason the drama would fail. When you tried to raise the concern with her that it was affecting you negatively, she only brushed you off with a comment about how you should know to take constructive criticism this early to succeed in the actual industry.

At eighteen years old, you could only clench your teeth and accept your fate.

Things only got worse when you overheard Seungmin talking to his friends near the vending machines after practice one day—the same day they were talking about you.

“Dude, why did you choose Y/N to be the female lead?” One of Seungmin’s friends, Yeonjun, groaned aloud. “She’s awful at it. What? Do you like her or something?”

Seungmin only shrugged. “Not really,” he said, uninterested. “I just kept seeing her name during level advancements but never saw her doing anything to stand out. If she got this far, then I should give her a chance, no?” Yeonjun pursed his lips at the answer.

“That’s just cruel, man. The witch has it out for her now.”

“Then she can just do better,” Seungmin chuckles, taking a sip from his soda before continuing. “Not my problem anymore. If I do my role well enough, maybe they’ll pay less attention to whatever she’s doing.”

Beomgyu, another friend of his, scoffed. “So, like—you’re basically using her to your advantage.” You watched Seungmin wave him off without a care.

“Stop making it sound so bad like that,” he hums at the thought. “Let’s just say I’m saving her the embarrassment. Like you said, it was my fault she’s getting thrown around like this anyway,” Seungmin continues before tossing his empty can of soda in the trash.

And wow, did you feel like one after hearing that.

Starting from that point onwards, you held a dislike for Kim Seungmin. It did, however, give you enough spite to use as a driving force to do well in the charity drama—eventually climbing up to senior level right beside Seungmin, where you two clashed for the higher ranks before graduating and starting your own careers.

Despite this, the memory of the junior project still stayed ingrained in you, never really managing to fade away like you wanted it to, causing you to struggle in your quest to succeed in the industry. The deprecating thoughts came at the worst times, making you revert back to that eighteen-year-old who kept her tears at bay as the director shouted at her for the nth time.

It was particularly the worst right now.

“Cut! Bad take!”

You snapped your head towards Director Han, who looked so frustrated that he started to resemble a certain someone from the ghosts of your memories. Kim Seungmin was in front of you, his tongue poking at his cheek after hearing the comment. Right, you were at the set—shooting a scene. And you had just failed to say your next line.

“Actress Y/N, you can’t just keep forgetting your lines like this!”

04 : FOUR.

You really can’t go on forgetting your lines like this.

“Y/N.” Changbin sighs heavily. “Seriously, what’s going on?”

It would have been amazing if the gods could hear your plea. Your wish was fairly simple, after all—to be buried six feet under at the moment. To hell with being a popular actress; you wanted nothing more than to disappear right now after that stunt you just pulled. On the first day of filming, no less.

Should you just go dig your own hole instead?

“It won’t happen again,” you softly replied, like a child getting scolded by their mother.

Your manager could only take a deep inhale at your words. “And I believe you, I really do,” he says. “But I can’t just let this go like this.”

Of course, he couldn’t. You would do the same thing in his shoes. Changbin was a manager for an actress—an actress who clearly can’t even manage herself. Your job’s core had a simple description, and that was to act out your lines. Lines that you had to memorize, internalize, and perform. What was the point of having seven years of experience under your belt if you couldn’t even do the basics of your occupation?

“You have to understand, Y/N. It wasn’t just once, or twice, or heck—not even thrice! You had a minimum of five retakes per couple of lines, and that’s already concerning enough for me to have to intervene. Director Han was really disappointed today, and it’s only the first filming. The only reason you’re still coming back on set tomorrow is because, at the end of the day, we managed to get good takes despite the issues. So pray tell, is something wrong?”

The humble inn’s room you were staying in became devoid of sound from your lack of response, making the cicadas outside seem a lot louder than they actually were. Your sitting figure made you look small in front of the man before you, who was pacing across the room in distressed strides. In all honesty, you had nothing to say back to Changbin. As much as you trusted him like your own older brother, explaining your oh-so-stellar performance earlier would entail having to reveal your past with Kim Seungmin, which was the last thing on the list of secrets you wanted to get out. Thus, there was only one solution to your dilemma.

“Can we replace Kim Seungmin?”

Changbin’s jaw slacked. “What—him again?” He laughed humorlessly, completely baffled at your request. “And replace, you say? Y/N, at the rate we’re going, you’re the one in danger of getting replaced!”

Okay, you should’ve expected that. But the sting from your manager’s comment wouldn’t hurt any less, even if you did.

You were well aware of all of your shortcomings as an actress. The seven years you gained in this industry clearly taught you a lot of important lessons, but those same seven years barely did anything to your ability, no matter the amount of effort you desperately poured into your career. It felt like a futile attempt at pouring into a cup that had a big hole at the bottom—knowing you could be filled to the brim with the necessary factors to succeed exponentially, yet still letting everything go down the drain.

Maybe this was the wake up call you needed to acknowledge that you’re the only one holding yourself back. And you had the slight inkling that you knew all along where this whole mess stemmed from.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what, even?” Changbin ran a hand through his already tousled hair. “Look, if you really don’t want to tell me, then fine. I’ll respect your wishes. But you can’t expect me to understand where you’re coming from if I know nothing. Deal with how overbearing I could be, or I don’t know, just keep that in mind.”

“I understand.” You meekly nodded. “Sorry, again. I’ll do better tomorrow.”

With your vague words, Changbin eventually came to the conclusion that you weren’t going to speak about the issue today. Walking towards you, he finally accepted your decision with a light pat on the head. “You don’t have to say that to me, Y/N. Maybe to the crew tomorrow. And Actor Kim Seungmin if you want. Just promise me a better performance tomorrow, and we’ll be good.”

You chuckled dryly. “Yes, I’ll do that.”

“Alright.” Your manager rolled his shoulders back, releasing the tension that built up from his pacing. “I’ll go to my own room now. Get some good rest. You need it after what happened today,” he chuckles.

“Okay, good night.”

You plastered a small smile for him, only letting it drop completely after you heard the door shut. After that, it was just you and your mind, ready to play the most depressing thoughts all through the night to beat you down once again. However, you weren’t going to fall for that today. You had already promised a better performance on filming tomorrow.

And what better ways were there to achieve both than practice until the sun rises?

Well, that surely did it’s work for you because you walked into the set the next day looking like a few years had just shaved off your lifespan. But as long as you could still function well enough to participate in the shoot, then you would consider your little sacrifice worth it.

A certain someone would beg to disagree, though.

Seungmin has never felt more concerned in his life. Just what in the world did you do all night to come out of your room looking like a literal zombie? To make matters worse, no one was even batting an eye at your less-than-ideal state! He watched you get your makeup done from across the tent with a thoughtful expression.

“Is it just me, or did Y/N get no sleep whatsoever?”

Minho cringed at Seungmin’s blunt comment. “Oh, you noticed it too?” He purses his lip, feeling uneasy. “I feel bad for her, but after the mishap from yesterday, I wouldn’t be surprised if she stayed up all night trying to make sure it doesn’t happen again. No sleep is better than no role in this industry, after all.”

Seungmin frowned at his manager’s words. That can’t be right. Sure, as actors, getting roles to play was their bread and butter—but no project was going to be worth more than their own well-being. If your condition was bad, then how were you expecting to have the proper mindset to act well? That should be simple logic.

He huffed. “I’m going to talk to her.”

Before he could even take a step forward, a strong force had already pulled him back. “Stop right there, Seungmin.” His manager gripped his shoulder in warning. “I know you mean well, but please do not do anything to agitate Actress Y/N any further.”

Seungmin turns back in disbelief. “What are you even talking about?”

“Aren’t you two close? I know how you joke around when you’re comfortable, and I’m just letting you know that this might not be the best time to do so.”

The actor narrowed his eyes at the implication being thrown his way. “You know, you’re making me out to be a major ass right now.” Minho shrugged.

“That’s because one wrong move, and you might as well be,” he sighs. “Look, all I’m saying is that what she probably needs right now is support. Someone who would give her motivation to get through the shoot today.”

Seungmin deadpanned at his manager’s sudden advice. He wasn’t expecting Minho, of all people, to lecture him about how to properly interact with others. “Exactly?” The younger of the two raises a brow. “What else do you think I was going to do?”

Minho looked hesitant for a second. “You and I both know that you’re not exactly the most—” he trails off, making random expressive movements with his hands instead. Seungmin scoffed.

“Spit it out.”

“—Motivating. You’re probably the least motivating person here.”

Seungmin visibly blanched at Minho’s admittance. Truth be told, he wasn’t expecting the older man to say anything particularly nice, but the actual reveal was just completely out of his radar.

Even when he was young, Seungmin never struggled with making friends. He’s always been well-liked by the people around him, which has made him fairly popular amongst his peers. With such a positive response from a lot of people regarding him as a person, Seungmin was clearly gifted in the art of making friends. So now, being told that he lacked the skill of uplifting others greatly confused him. If that were true, then shouldn’t he have had the opposite experience with socializing?

“I—” He stutters, caught off guard. “Do my social skills not prove to be enough for you?”

“Those are two completely separate things,” Minho barely managed to suppress a sneer. “Seungmin, you’re great at casual talk—that’s no surprise. But you also have the tendency to be dense. And that’s putting it lightly.”

“Oh.”

That would make sense. A part of him also admitted that his younger counterpart did struggle with connecting to others. Yes, he had a lot of friends, but that didn’t mean he saw all of them equally. As harsh as that may be, the old Seungmin had this unfathomable standard for people he could call friends, which he used as a strict criteria for judging others. He still kicks himself whenever he gets reminded of how big his high horse used to be, for no reason. Seungmin was more than willing to leave that time of his life at the back of his mind to collect dust. His life has been so much better without it, and he would do anything to maintain this satisfactory present he has carved for himself.

His manager chuckled. “Who knows, though? Maybe you could finally practice your empathy with this conversation. You’ve been around professional robots for far too long.”

“That sounds like an insult,” Seungmin says, expressing his doubt.

“I’m just saying it as it is.” Minho patted his back twice. “Now, I already warned you enough. If you still want to talk to Actress Y/N, then go ahead. Just know that whatever comes out of that mouth of yours is completely your responsibility, and I will not cover for you if you come out of this one with a broken friendship.”

Seungmin let the words sink in.

“There you go, all done!” Eunha exclaims, lightly pushing your hair forward to make the volume more noticeable. You gave her a thankful smile.

Eunha was someone you'd only known for two days, but she was already becoming your favorite person on set. The way she manages to lighten your mood every time made her worthy of being on the list of people you greatly appreciated, especially with how things were going for you recently. Today too, her positivity was very welcomed.

“Thank you,” you say while admiring her work. “It looks pretty today too.”

The hairstylist beamed. “Of course it should be,” she huffs in pride. “You need to be the prettiest one here on set. After all, you’re the female lead!”

You knew she didn’t mean it to be, but her words felt like little stabs to your heart. The prickly ache spread slowly, like poison that was meant to be discrete. You chuckled to offset the pain.

“Right.”

Female lead. The character you worked so hard for—only for you to also ruin the chance with your own hands. You couldn’t help but think of how ungrateful you were being, and for what? A personal grudge towards your co-star, who was being more professional about the situation than you ever tried to be? It was almost laughable how belatedly you realized that the situation was never going to be in your favor. You weren’t someone looking to be pitied, so why were you hypocritically trying to paint yourself as the distressed damsel?

Eunha sent you a troubled glance as she fixed the tools on the table. “Are you alright? I—” She sighed. “I didn’t want to point it out earlier, but I guess my concern got the best of me. The bags under your eyes looked deep earlier—Yerin did a great job covering them up, though! You don’t worry about how you’ll look on camera, but I’m just worried about your condition.”

You sheepishly scratched your arm at being pointed out. “Sorry for worrying you. I just forgot the time last night and fell asleep late. You could say I was too excited to shoot again today.”

“Well, that’s a lie if I’ve ever heard one.”

You jumped in your chair, startled by Seungmin’s voice suddenly joining the space on your side of the tent. Eunha’s eyes gave you a silent apology before bowing to Seungmin and heading out of the tent, indicating that her task was finished. Your gaze fluttered toward your co-star, who was looking at you in a disapproving manner. It was then that you remembered his comment.

“And that was rude of you to disrupt a conversation that had nothing to do with you.”

Seungmin wasn’t fazed by your bite. “Why didn’t you sleep?”

“I asked a question first, Kim.” You crossed your arms at being ignored. “Also, I did sleep.”

"No, you didn’t,” he pressed on. You could feel your blood pressure rise at his insistence. “Even a twenty-minute nap could do wonders. You just look horrible.” You scoffed at the insult.

“Gee, thanks. Exactly what I needed to hear.”

Seungmin’s eyes widened comically, and you almost laughed at the sight. Almost. He looked so guilty of what he had just said that you felt the urge to tease him as revenge.

“Wait, no—”

“An explanation isn’t necessary,” you hummed. “Even if that wasn’t a joke, I could really care less right now.”

Your reply made Seungmin flail his hands around like a madman. “It was a joke. I didn’t mean anything about it,” he coughs out before composing himself after realizing how silly he was acting. “Sorry.”

“Ok. Thank you for apologizing.”

“Sure,” he trailed off. Seungmin was now unsure of what to even do.

Oddly enough, your heart warmed at his reaction. A part of you was thanking yourself for finally becoming more rational, as you thought that maybe he wasn’t so bad. Sure, your past together was still rocky territory, but you had to remind yourself that time had also passed. Seven years at that. That detail took you back to the conversation you two had back at the table reading. You remember the way you hissed at him that you had changed—what made you assume that he couldn’t do it too? Everyone was allowed to become better versions of themselves, and Kim Seungmin wasn’t exempted from that. He was but another person living amongst others in this world, after all.

Changbin was right. Seungmin also deserved an apology.

“I guess I also owe you an apology,” you say softly. “About how I’ve been towards you the whole time—it was immature of me. I hope we can continue to work well until the end of this project, like you said yesterday.”

“Now, this is just odd.”

Seungmin was now utterly lost. He recalls approaching you despite Minho’s warnings, deciding that he had enough self-restraint to not screw it up—only to end up insulting you without meaning to. But that wasn’t the confusing part.

It was your reaction.

In Seungmin’s experience, you weren’t one to let something go like that. Even back when you both were in your senior level days at the academy, a simple jest from him would set you off into flames. The you he knew would immediately choose to chew him out, hoping that he would get burned by a rogue ember of your fury for even just attempting to speak such words. But the person in front of him right now did none of that. The you in the present simply took the accidental insult and even apologized for the ones you’ve spat out over the previous days. It was a whiplash, to say the least—just yesterday he was still fighting to keep you in a flowing conversation. So, what was this he was witnessing?

“Is it?” You snicker. “Just think of it like winning. You were right. This is a high-profile project, and I’m over here messing around. I’ve prepared a better performance for you all to see today, so be rest assured.” Seungmin still wasn’t assured.

“Y/N, are you sure you’re alright—”

“Main characters on set!”

Damn. So that’s how it feels for your conversation to get interrupted by someone unrelated to it. Seungmin internally acknowledged your annoyance earlier and kicked the memory of himself from a few minutes earlier.

You turned back to him, tilting your head. “What was that?” Seungmin refused to admit that he found the action cute.

“No, it’s nothing,” he said, clearing his throat. “Let’s have a good shoot.”

05 : FIVE.

Okay, you do not think this was turning out to be a good shoot.

You were already regretting pulling another all-nighter the day after you got absolutely no sleep. This meant that you were already nearing 48 hours of no sleep, to which you were surprised you were still even capable of functioning. You had never gone this long without sleep, and it was both thrilling and terrifying to you at the same time.

Honestly, you were already expecting to feel lethargic after the shoot yesterday, especially after staying up the entire night to master your parts and was planning to go to sleep early to make up for it. However, after getting nothing but praise from the directors and filming crew the whole day for your stellar performance that day, you came to the conclusion that perhaps your sacrificial act was exceptionally effective. A little too effective since your manager even said that your acting became much more alive than the takes you did the previous day, despite feeling the complete opposite internally.

Now, while you normally wouldn’t describe yourself as someone who was peer pressured easily, it still felt really nice for your hard work to be acknowledged after the disappointing performance you had the day before. Which also led you to your current predicament—woefully repeating the same magical process that helped you gain your reputation back.

“You’re yawning an awful lot.” Seungmin raised a brow in question. “Don’t tell me that all the praise you got yesterday already got to your head, and you suddenly find all this boring.”

An irked look made its way onto your face, pinching hard on Seungmin’s arm. You watched in satisfaction as he yelped audibly at your damage, jerking away in reflex. “What the fuck, woman?”

“It’s what you get,” you say nonchalantly while shrugging. Seungmin scoffs at the response.

“Just because we have a truce now doesn’t mean you can abuse me whenever you like,” he snarls. “What happened to the Y/N who didn’t want me to talk to her unless, quote on quote, necessary?”

You cringe at the unwelcome reminder of your previous activities. “I apologized! Would you rather have me act like a total bitch again?”

“Well—no. That Y/N was a pain to deal with.”

“Then be grateful for what you have right now.”

Seungmin lets out an amused snort, crossing his arms and leaning backwards closer towards the living room’s walls, where you two were on standby. “Oh, believe me. I’m more than grateful.”

The set right now was in a cozy cottage house, designed to imitate what the female lead’s family home would look like. You had already moved past the beginnings of the main characters’ romance yesterday and were now heading into the development stage, where they spend more time together until they realize their feelings. A domestic scene in one character’s home was a popular trope—which was, of course, also included in the movie.

If today’s shoot goes well, then you only have one day left in the filming process before everyone packs up to head back to the city. Not for Seungmin, though. The male lead still had to film the first part of the movie where he quit his job at the company. You’d have to laugh at him about it on the last day.

First, you had to get through this shoot without fainting flat on your face.

It was a particularly hot day too, which made your drowsiness even worse. The rural countryside cottage didn’t have an air conditioner set up, so you had to make do with fans all over the place. But that barely did anything to cool you down, as the air around the place itself was humid. At least you weren’t shooting out in the sun today.

“Geez, my makeup might melt even before we start filming,” you groan. “That’s if my head doesn’t explode first.”

Seungmin chuckles. “Blame your character for being a sweater enthusiast. That outfit must be torture in this weather.”

He wasn’t wrong about that. The thick baby blue cardigan you were wearing felt like a punishment to wear at the moment. It was unfortunate that you felt really cute in this get-up because you wanted to trash on it so badly.

Actually, fuck it. Comfort matters more.

“I don’t understand how she does it,” you whine dramatically. “Every scene she’s had has her wearing some kind of version of a sweater. Does she not get hot at all?” You pull on your slightly weighted cardigan.

“I do think she’s plenty hot enough.” Seungmin smirks, glancing at you while waiting for your reaction.

You hummed in agreement. “She’s probably just tolerating it since it's her clothing style. I’ve had my fair share of those moments too.”

It wasn’t something you could see since you were more preoccupied with watching the staff prepare for filming, but Seungmin’s ears were slowly turning red. He took note of how his less than savory joke completely flew over your head, now leaving him to drown in the embarrassment of his original intentions.

Internally, he was already having a boxing match with himself. He thinks she’s plenty hot enough? What does that even mean? You were the only image he had of the female lead since you had her role! Seungmin wanted the ground to suddenly swallow him whole at the implication.

You, on the other hand, were fighting a completely different battle. The combination of the heat and your severe lack of sleep was becoming dangerous. You could already feel a growing pounding in your head, the world’s noise becoming more muffled by the second. It seemed like your vision wasn’t affected yet, though—and for that, you were relieved. That meant you could still stretch yourself out until the shoot was finished. You’d already done this once yesterday, so a second time wouldn’t be that bad, right?

Wrong.

Seungmin’s voice as he carried out his lines in the scene seemed so far away to you already, and it had only been an hour since the cameras started rolling. Internally, you were already sounding the sirens. Something was definitely wrong—you don’t think Seungmin was supposed to sound like he was underwater.

Your co-star seemed to notice that you were out of it too, except he couldn’t exactly stop the scene as you were still conducting your parts as proficiently as you could. Director Han hasn’t called a cut yet, either. So, he settled on carefully watching you for signs. You also thought you could last until the scene was over—until you couldn’t.

The last thing you remember was a figure rushing over to you before your sight went pitch black.

“Y/N!”

“Cut!”

Seungmin felt his heart race as he dashed over to catch you from crashing to the ground. What was going on? You were completely fine a while ago. How did you end up fainting? Could it have been the heat? He didn’t think it was going to be that bad for you since he was dealing with it pretty well. The heat wasn’t exactly unbearable. So what was it?

“Actor Kim Seungmin,” D.O.P. Bang called out. “We should take her to the medic tent. Someone, call her manager.”

Seungmin had never agreed more to a suggestion in his life.

“Seungmin? What’s—” Minho’s face paled in shock at the sight of your limp figure. “Oh, shit. That’s why everyone is running around like headless chickens. Quick, let’s get her to the medics.”

Minho sped over to give the actor a helping hand on steadying you, only to be stopped. “We’re wasting so much time.” Seungmin clicks his tongue.

Everyone could only watch as Seungmin positioned his arms on your back and behind your knees, hastily pulling you up towards him in a bridal carry and speeding away to the medic’s tent. Minho’s jaw dropped at his talent’s actions before recovering from the shock and tailing him.

“Seungmin!”

“What?” Seungmin responds half-heartedly as he sets you down on the cushioned stretcher, stepping back as the medics do their job.

“You—” Minho squeaks out. “What was that?”

“What was what?”

“That!” He gestured towards you, still unconscious and being checked on by the medics on standby. “Did you just carry Actress Y/N?”

Seungmin ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “And what about it? Did I commit a crime or something? I was just helping!”

Minho was conflicted. In all the years he had been working as Seungmin’s manager, the actor had never shown this much attention towards his other co-workers, despite maintaining an approachable and friendly image. Of course, that wasn’t particularly a bad thing—especially in an industry where caution towards everyone around you was basic common sense to prevent yourself from going down a road that would lead to your demise. The view was great up where it was high, but the fall was just as immense.

What Minho did acknowledge was your past with Seungmin. Because of that, he was inclined to think more about your friendship with his talent and how that played into your dynamic. Yet, over the course of the two days you two had been filming, he hasn’t exactly seen the kind of relationship he was expecting. There were discrepancies in what he knew about you and Seungmin, as well as gaps in the bond his actor painted a picture of. In times like these, there were only a few reasonable explanations that Minho could think of, which made him uneasy.

Something big was coming in the future—one that he needed to prepare for as early as now.

Hurried footsteps could be heard nearing the tent as Seungmin and Minho diverted their lines of sight towards the entrance, just in time to see a fairly muscular figure come in all frantic. “How is she?”

Minho immediately recognized the man from a conversation he had in the personal staff area, recalling his introduction as your manager. The former bowed slightly in greeting. “Manager Seo Changbin.” Seungmin felt his blood boil after seeing your manager’s late entrance.

“Where even were you?” He asked coldly, intentionally making his tone sharp. “You know, for her manager, you sure are practically nowhere to be found during shoots.”

Changbin splutters at the accusation. “Y/N doesn’t like it when I stay to watch! She says it��s pressuring!”

“Sure. But it’s your job to be on standby in the event that she needs you. How come you weren’t?”

“I—”

“Okay, that’s enough.” A new face entered the space, who Seungmin quickly made out to be Assistant Director Lee. The second-in-hand gave him a disapproving look. “Actor Kim Seungmin, please stop lashing out at Actress Y/N’s manager.”

Seungmin felt like he was seconds away from committing arson. “I’m not lashing out if it's a reasonable argument!”

He felt someone grab a hold of him, forcefully pushing him down to sit. It was only then that Seungmin seemed to finally be conscious of how emotionally he had been acting—accepting Minho’s foresight on his actions. Assistant Director Lee, on the other hand, did not appreciate his recklessness.

“That it is, but we’re going to need you to stay calm,” he states. “The situation is sensitive enough as it is.”

Seungmin felt like he had no choice but to agree. He couldn’t risk making an unreasonable scene in such a respected project set, and knowing you, a tension-filled tent wasn’t going to be your preferred area of rest. Glancing back at your unconscious figure still being tended to, he let out a sigh to release the extra pressure in his chest.

Just what was he doing right now?

Once Assistant Director Lee saw him calm down a significant amount, he clapped to disperse the heavy silence. “Great. Now, can someone inform us when she wakes up so we can restart the shoot?”

So much for calming down, because Seungmin’s temper flared up again in an instant. “Are you kidding me?” He growled. “No, we are not proceeding with filming today!”

“Actor Kim, we don’t have enough time—”

“I’ll pay for all the expenses for the extension and rescheduling of all the remaining shoots. Put all of it under my personal bank account.”

Minho’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets in shock. “Seungmin, what—”

“I said what I said,” Seungmin continued. “Now go do it. Both of us won’t step in front of the camera for the rest of the day.”

“You can’t just decide that for Actress Y/N,” Assistant Director Lee reasoned in disbelief.

Unluckily for him, Seungmin had already made up his mind—and when that happens, he isn’t one to give up on it.

“Then we’ll tell her it’s cancelled because I’m sure as hell won’t be filming today. You can’t make her act out the scenes prepared today without me.”

Assistant Director Lee was conflicted. Taking a day off so suddenly when they’d already had everything set up was going to be such a waste—and frankly, Director Han was already on edge about it. Granted, this wasn’t the first time he’d come across this situation, and certainly won’t be the last in his time in the industry. Now, an actor telling them that they’d pay for the cost of their demand? That one was new.

Kim Seungmin was notorious in the field for being a perfectionist, so he honestly came in here expecting him to agree with their plan. Maybe he should’ve considered the rumors he’d heard around the set that Actor Kim and you were closer than they initially thought. With that, Assistant Director Lee could only sigh. He’d just have to deal with Director Han’s displeasure.

Along with being a perfectionist, Kim Seungmin was also incredibly stubborn.

“I understand,” he concedes. “I’ll inform Director Han.”

Seungmin tried not to show his surprise on his face. He didn’t think he’d actually get this result so easily, but it was welcomed. “Thank you.”

“Let us know if you change your mind.”

“I won’t.”

Assistant Director Lee chuckled at Seungmin’s firm reply before announcing his leave. The atmosphere in the tent improved as he stepped out, but awkwardness still lingered in the air. Minho dropped down to slump on a plastic chair, leaving Changbin to stand stiffly near him.

“Y/N is totally gonna kill you, dude.” Minho groans, completely letting go of formalities in stress.

Seungmin had half the mind to be embarrassed by his choices. “And to think I’m doing this all for her sake,” he scoffs good-naturedly before turning to your manager. “Did something happen before the shoot? She couldn’t have passed out like this just because of the heat today.”

Changbin scratches at his neck. “Uh, I’m not sure—”

“—It’s exhaustion,” one of the medics spoke up. “Her body seems to be completely fatigued, as well as slightly dehydrated, but that must be the heat’s contribution. Has she not been getting enough rest?”

They watched as Changbin’s face morphed into shock, completely unsure of how that could’ve even happened. “But she said she was going to bed early yesterday!”

Your manager was slowly getting on Seungmin’s nerves. First, it was his constant absence from the set. Next, it was his blatant disregard for your well-being. The last time he checked, a manager was supposed to be aware of their talent’s condition as much as possible. Any less and it would be neglect.

He narrowed his eyes. “The picture you’re painting for me is not a good one, Manager Seo.”

“What are you implying right now, Actor Kim?” Changbin pounced back, Seungmin’s tone stirring negative emotions inside him.

Seungmin refused to back down. “You know damn well.”

“Kim Seungmin!”

“Watch your mouth—”

A rustling noise interrupted the three men’s small disagreement. “Ugh,” you groaned in pain. “What in the world?”

“Y/N!” Seungmin jumps up without a second thought to rush over. In the distance, Minho and Changbin’s eyes meet in mutual speculation.

“Seungmin, sorry, but please shut up.” You raise a hand to cradle your head. “My head is pounding.”

You could vaguely make up a medic handing Seungmin some pills and a bottle of water, saying something about how you were stable enough to just need rest and hydration. The next thing you knew was feeling a hand gently take your chin to create an opening and a pill being dropped inside, along with a water bottle pressing against your lips. You gulped it down in shock.

“The fuck—” You coughed. Another hand came up again to wipe some of the water you spilled around your mouth before you pushed it away. “Kim Seungmin!”

Your co-star rolled his eyes at your dramatics. “Would it kill you to stop being so fussy?”

“Not when you’re treating me like a child!”

Changbin clears his throat, effectively stopping your bickering. “Uh—I’m going to go get us lunch,” he meekly informs you two. “The medics also already went out to get food earlier, so I think we need to get our share before it’s all gone.”

Minho nods at Changbin’s words a bit too enthusiastically for your liking. “I’ll come with him. You two can talk while waiting.”

The two of you watch as your managers dash out of the tent like cartoon characters, raising a suspicious brow at their sudden change in behavior. Seungmin clicked his tongue in annoyance before turning back to you and flicking a finger at your forehead without warning. You squealed at the added pain as Seungmin’s suppressed laughter filled the room.

“You are such an asshole!” You shriek while bringing both hands to shield your forehead belatedly.

“And your hair looks like a nest,” he replies with a snicker.

You gave him a glare at his comment, rubbing the sore spot gently. “Shit,” you whined, feeling the ache from inside your head again. “I can’t believe I fainted. How long was I out? What about the shoot? Are we resuming after lunch?”

The questions you were asking him only served as Seungmin’s reminder of his actions earlier, causing his mouth to run dry. Truth be told, even he was unsure of how to tell you everything that happened while you were away in dreamland. He couldn’t just drop the ball at you that he made sure that the shoot had been cancelled just for you to have the rest of the day to rest up. At the same time, there was practically no other way to convince you that the cancellation wasn’t your fault unless he told you the truth.

But Seungmin had already caused you enough misunderstandings to last a decade—and he wasn’t about to add another one.

“You weren’t out for long,” he told you. “I’m actually surprised you even woke up right away. The shoot’s cancelled.”

He watched you pause to let the words sink in. What did he mean by the shoot’s been cancelled? Wouldn’t that be too costly? After all, you were literally renting a place far away from the city to shoot this movie. A shoot cancellation meant an extension, which also meant new arrangements needed to be made. You curled up into a ball, wanting to evaporate into the clouds at the heat of the sun. How much more were you going to screw up everyone’s experience with this project?

“Is it because of me?” You muttered.

Seungmin felt something inside him break at how small you made yourself seem. This was exactly what he was trying to avoid, only to once again fail to prevent it. That one was on him, though—he didn’t manage to tell you right away that he was the one responsible for the shoot’s cancellation. He felt the need to chase away your negative headspace as fast as possible.

“Why do you always blame yourself first? I cancelled the shoot, so just get some more rest.” He sighs.

Your eyes snap upwards to meet his. He had got to joking. “What?” You ask, bewildered at the statement. “And they agreed? I can still continue!”

Seungmin immediately acts to lift your legs back up on the stretcher when he sees you trying to get up. He places a heavy hand on your calves to lock them in place before sending you an unamused stare. “Land a single foot out of this stretcher, and I’ll make sure the shoot gets moved to next week.”

“You can’t just do that!” Your mouth gaped open like a fish. “Do you even know how bad the cost is going to be to extend for that long?”

“I’m more than capable of shouldering the expenses.”

That single statement made your stomach drop. “You cannot be serious,” was your horrified reaction. “Seungmin, did you pay for the extension costs?”

The man before you only shrugged, like he hadn’t just dropped significant information. “What about it?” You blanched at his unconcerned attitude.

“What do you mean, what about it?” You asked, absolutely outraged. “I swear, you’ve always been like this! You think you could just play around with everything around you, since you can. Why can’t you take things seriously for once?”

It was Seungmin’s turn to look offended. “Now, when did I ever do that?”

“The charity drama!” You cry out. “Yeah, I knew all about your little plan back then. If you acted well enough, they wouldn’t pay attention to whatever mess I was making, was it? I even overheard you telling your friends you chose me to become the female lead just because you were curious about how I kept advancing levels when I barely met the standard—and there I was foolish enough to believe that you chose me for my skills!”

“I—” Seungmin stammers. “I don’t remember that.”

“Of course you wouldn’t,” you held back a sob, feeling emotional as you poured out your inner insecurities. “Why would you? Someone of your caliber could go around bending things to your will, and no one would bat an eye since they would justify it with your talent. I’m the complete opposite, Seungmin.”

Seungmin was quite alarmed, to say the least. These were your side of the story—the side that he never got to acknowledge. He could only watch you try to keep yourself together in front of him, clearly struggling as your emotions ran wild at the release of what seemed to be years of suppressed experiences. His body was screaming at him to move and comfort you in any way he knew how, but for the first time in his life, Seungmin was completely frozen in guilt.

“I’ve lived the life below people like you. We were the ones that were always stuck in the shadows, where stepping on us became the norm. People like us were the pieces in your games of chess who couldn’t even speak out in the fear of being thrown out.” You inhaled deeply before meeting his gaze. “It was a life you would never even begin to imagine experiencing at your ability, Seungmin.”

Your words were like spears thrown at Seungmin’s heart. They all rang true in his head. He would never understand what you went through because he was part of the problem. Seungmin thought back to his past, trying to recall where it all started.

He was a young child, only ten years old, when he discovered his passion for acting. His class decided to do a play for the school festival, and he got the role of the main character completely by chance through drawing lots. Young Seungmin didn’t think of it too much and agreed out of obligation. It wasn’t until practices started that he started to take an interest in it after receiving constant praise from his classmates and homeroom teacher. This fascination only bloomed more on the day of the festival, where he found out that performing for people could be this exhilarating.

From then on, Seungmin made it his lifelong dream to become an actor. Seeing his talent in the field, his parents supported him wholeheartedly, eventually leading to them suggesting he join an acting academy to improve. The praises didn’t stop even after he joined the academy—in fact, they only doubled in frequency, making Seungmin come to the conclusion that he must’ve been some sort of prodigy. Perhaps it was due to that mindset of his that he paraded around like the world was his. To his defense, none of the adults around him saw the wrong in his behavior and even went as far as encouraging it.

It was when he graduated from the academy and started his work as a professional actor that he got humbled by all the talent around him. Everyone seemed to be on his level or greater, which completely shattered his worldview. During those times in his rookie years, he learned the importance of hard work and how much it could really make a difference. There was one time that he thought to himself—maybe this was the reason he felt so attracted to you.

You were the first person he ever associated with the difference that hard work brought. Seungmin first noticed you on the first day of intermediate level. He had gotten to that level first and thus kept an eye out for notable candidates from the beginner level. The thing is, he had never even heard of you or any of your performances—so it was a complete surprise to see you climb up to intermediate level. From then on, he observed you from afar, never really approaching. To him, you seemed plain; someone who didn’t even exude star quality. So eventually, he forgot all about you again.

Until he saw your name on the same paper as his, indicating that both of you would be in the same batch that got promoted to junior level.

The charity drama was another project Seungmin gained an unexpected opportunity from. With the privilege given to him as the top ranker for the year-end evaluations, he chose you as his female lead. All Seungmin wanted was to see what kind of shine you had as an actor, and he was rewarded greatly with your stellar performance after days of painful practices. When you were once again bumped up to senior level right alongside him, he was ecstatic. You had changed since the charity drama, and your aura started to take up more space in their small practice room. Seungmin wanted to get closer to you, but the two of you would only end up clashing every time. He guesses that you and him were just complete opposites in everything, down to your work ethic. He still tried to interact with you in any way he knew how, though—which led to his friends teasing him about his little crush on you.

Now, he couldn’t help but think that maybe they were right.

Seungmin pulled his hand away from your calves, letting his hands fall down on his sides before bowing deeply. “I’m sorry. There would be no excuse for my actions, and it’s even worse that I have no recollection of the details when I’ve obviously affected someone. I know an apology wouldn’t erase everything that has already happened, but it would be the start of my attempts to make sure it doesn’t happen again. At this point, all I can ask for is your forgiveness.”

You quickly reached out to grasp his arms, trying to pull him up from his act of remorse. “Get up—oh my god. It’s fine, Seungmin. Really. I’ve already forgiven you yesterday, honestly. My behavior also had some faults towards you, and it was unacceptable.”

“Knowing why now, I think it was more than reasonable.”

You let out a laugh at his words. “You’re just trying to make me feel better,” you teased. “Now, I think the other crew members also deserve an apology from us.” Seungmin’s face paled at the reminder. Just imagining Assistant Director Lee scolding him for his audacity earlier was sending him into early retirement.

“Yeah,” he coughs. “But can we not take back the shoot cancellation? It would be so awkward for me if we did, and you still need the rest.”

“Fine, you big baby.” You pinched his cheek after seeing his childish pout. Seungmin was quick to swat your hand away, despite the burning sensation he could feel heating up his ears. “So does this mean we’re friends?”

Even if he could feel a crack form in his heart from your innocent words, Seungmin refused to show it.

“Sure. Friends.”

06 : SIX.

Being friends with Seungmin was odd.

Granted, you already got a taste of what that felt like for the two days that flew by since you two decided on a truce. However, you didn’t really feel much of a change in your dynamic in those two days—not until things took a turn after your conversation in the medic tent.

After your little heart-to-heart session, Seungmin had begun acting strangely. And by strangely, you meant becoming a complete one-eighty from the Kim Seungmin you were used to. It was almost like he was replaced by a softer, more warm-hearted version of himself. In one talk, you were suddenly subject to his endless affection, albeit still exhibiting the Kim Seungmin flare that you were comfortable with. Overall, it was just weird to think that four days ago, the two of you were fighting like cats and dogs. Now, you watched him bounce up and down as he gave himself a pep talk to prepare for the kissing scene.

“Are you that nervous?”

Seungmin flinches at your question, seemingly not expecting your voice to enter his head while he was seconds away from a meltdown. Your co-star looks at you sheepishly. “Is that bad? This is driving me insane.”

That was another thing different about Seungmin after the medic tent incident. He acted a lot more endearingly in your eyes. You faintly recall a comment you made a few days ago about how Seungmin would never be akin to a small bird who deserved to be doted on. But seeing the Seungmin in front of you right now, you might just take back your words.

Kim Seungmin had a lot more layers than you thought—and you found yourself wanting to uncover them all.

“I’m sure this isn’t your first kiss on camera,” you snort. “Just go do it like you usually do. Act like how your character would act in the moment. You have my whole consent, anyway.”

Seungmin wanted to tell you how much you didn’t understand his dilemma right now. In all fairness, even he was somewhat unsure of what was happening to him the past few days. All he did know was that he was right in what he thought during the first day of filming—he really did feel like he was turning younger in front of you.

It was almost embarrassing how easily he slipped into that carefree attitude around you, especially after your conversation in the medic tent. He was doing so well up until then, so what happened? Seungmin couldn’t be more curious about his own actions. He did have an inkling of what it was, but he needed more proof to act on it. Seungmin couldn’t risk becoming more of an idiot in your eyes. You already had too much of that experience with him during your filming yesterday, which was the rescheduled shoot of the one he demanded to pause.

That also meant that this was the last day you two had on set together before everyone packed their bags and headed back to the city. After that, it would be just him again on set to film the movie’s first scenes of his character.

Seungmin wasn’t disappointed. He totally wasn’t.

“What are you going to do if I lose control and give into my character, huh?” He argues. You stopped reading your script to give him an unamused stare.

“Seriously?” You scoffed. “If you really must know, then I wouldn’t do anything. If that’s what the male lead feels, then the female lead just needs to reciprocate if they’re really in love with each other. As their actors, we need to deliver those same emotions.”

You didn’t get what was making Seungmin so on edge about the scene. Reviewing his past works, this certainly wouldn’t be his first on-screen kiss, nor was it his first romance project as the male lead. What made you so different from his other co-stars that was making him act like a rookie?

“If anything, I should be more nervous than you. This is actually my first kiss scene!”

“That’s just even worse!” Seungmin whines, burying his face in his hands. “This is gonna be terrible.”

It was then that you finally had an idea as to why Seungmin looked like he was having a mid-life crisis this early in his life.

You felt a grin creep up on your face and paste itself there. “Did you want this to be a good memory for me?”

Seungmin groans at your poking. “Stop teasing me! So what if I do? Did I commit a crime, huh?”

“The crime of stealing my heart, yes.”

“You’re insufferable.”

“Thank you,” you laugh. “I try my best.”

Seungmin mutters something beneath his breath—something you couldn’t hear because of Director Han calling for the two of you. He watched as you skipped away, leaving him to follow in your footsteps. Seungmin smiled at the picture painted in front of him.

“I know.”

You stopped at your designated place in front of the camera, turning back to look at Seungmin beside you, who was already sweating bullets. Your hand unconsciously lifts up to wipe them off, which startles the both of you. Seungmin opens his mouth to say something but was cut off by Director Han’s loud voice.

“Alright!” He claps. “This is our last scene for the day before we call it a wrap! I’m sure you two already know what it is, so all I’ll say is don't think too much about this. Enjoy it, or whatever you want to do—as long as it looks natural. Sounds good?” The two of you nod at him.

“Okay, camera starts at three,” he says, motioning towards D.O.P. Bang. “Two, one. Action!”

You took the opportunity to appreciate the scenery around you as the camera started rolling. The scene was set on a hill with a breathtaking view of the rest of the town. Hues of orange and pink start to tint the surroundings as the sun sets in the background. It was nothing less than ethereal, and you almost envied the female lead for having this moment in her life.

“I’ve always wanted to take someone here,” Seungmin says, reciting his lines. “When I was younger, I told myself that I was going to bring my true love here and propose. It was unfortunate that I moved away—this was my favorite spot in the whole world.”

You let yourself completely immerse in the situation. “Propose, huh? I’m sure the lucky person would love it up here. It’s so serene, like it's taking away all your stress just by being here.”

Seungmin gently grabs your hand into his, making you turn to meet his eyes. You almost gasped out of character after seeing the immense amount of love swirling in his gaze. Love looked great on him, you pointed out in your head. One day, Seungmin was going to look at someone else with the same gaze—someone that he loved with all his heart. A tinge of hot green jealousy burned in your stomach at the thought.

Part of you yearned for someone to look at you even just a fourth of the way Seungmin portrayed the male lead’s longing for the female lead. But for now, you had a role to fulfill. You could just lock these feelings up for later.

“Do you?” He asks. Your breath hitches at his question. “I’m not proposing—well, not yet. But I brought you here for a similar reason.”

Seungmin reaches for your other hand, now holding both of them. “I love you so much. I know our time together hasn’t been the longest, but it seems like my heart has found its way back home. Honestly, I first thought that it was just because I was back in town, but eventually I realized that I felt at home with you too.” He caresses your knuckles with his thumbs. “Maybe my heart knew where it belonged long before I did. I loved you back then, just like I love you now.”

You couldn’t help but genuinely tear up at Seungmin’s monologue. It was such a beautiful feeling to be loved, and you hoped that someday you could experience the same kind of love you acted with. “So, I’ll ask you this question,” Seungmin continued.

“Will you be mine?”

“Yes,” you sobbed out.

Seungmin lifts his hands to cup your crying face, bringing you closer to his own. The moment your lips connected felt so magical that you ended up leaning in more, savoring the moment with your fluttering heart. Seungmin reciprocates the act, kissing you with more emotion than he did just a second ago. His lips felt like smooth pillows, coaxing you to release all the tension you had left and rest—with him. Seungmin was being careful yet passionate at the same time, leaving you to drown in the sheer magnitude of the butterflies.

You couldn’t help but love every passing second that you were lost on his lips.

When you two pulled away due to the lack of air, he kept his forehead to yours, noses touching. The soft sound of both your laughter filled the surrounding area.

“Cut! That’s a wrap for today!” You hear everyone start cheering at Director Han’s words. Seungmin chuckles at them as he slowly steps back, missing the way your body followed after his warmth.

“Congratulations,” he says gently. You felt your heart skip a beat. “Your first on-screen kiss, done. How did I do?”

Oh, this was going to be dangerous for your heart.

07 : SEVEN.

There’s been an empty feeling in your heart since yesterday that you were trying to ignore.

It was currently the day after you returned to the city. You watched the bustling streets of urban life filter through the car’s tinted windows while Changbin continued to drive you back home after a busy day in the company. Something you had never expected to happen was getting attached to the small countryside town you filmed in enough to miss it like this.

You felt it when you stepped out of the car yesterday to head back to your apartment—the polished concrete floors of the parking building suddenly felt foreign to you. The abundance of luxury cars was evident in the space, reminding you that you were once again in the city. It felt almost cold and lonely with the way you couldn’t see the hills you got used to seeing all day long. But it would do, you think to yourself.

The city could also be warm if you wanted it to be.

“Oh? I think they’re filming the first scenes of the movie in a building around here,” Changbin pointed out from the driver’s seat. “Minho mentioned this street a day ago.”

You raised a brow at his words. “Since when did you and Seungmin’s manager get so close?”

“Ever since you and his talent did,” Changbin snickers.

Heat rose to your face at your manager’s teasing. It was no secret to anyone who witnessed the movie’s shoot that you and Seungmin got extremely close after the fainting incident. You were sure that his efforts to stop the filming from continuing that day was also the talk of the town with the crew members. After all, who would go so far as to pay for rescheduling costs for their co-star? Sure, you and Seungmin were friends, but the two of you were barely talking in the first few days of the project. Anyone in their right mind would find his actions out of the blue—just like you did too.

Maybe it was just Seungmin’s way of making up for all the things you both went through. At first, it made you mad at how he flaunted his blatant disregard for the people affected by his decisions. The image of younger Seungmin came to mind, triggering the part of you that still held a slight resentment for what he did before. However, you found yourself slowly changing your mind as you two apologized to the crew members for the sudden decision, promising them swift and quality scenes the next day. As Seungmin walked you back to your inn’s room, you couldn’t help but feel a tinge of happiness bubble in your stomach at the thought of someone caring enough to do this for you.

You watched as the evident signs of a film crew appeared in the distance, right in front of an office building. The same tents you’ve come to familiarize yourself with stood strong, indicating that this was indeed filming the same movie you were working on. It was already early in the evening, so they should be wrapping up any time soon. Should you stop by and say hello?

“Do you want to stop by and visit? You don’t have any schedules left for the rest of the evening,” Changbin suggests, getting ready to park near the building if you give confirmation.

Maybe you could repay Seungmin for his support over the past few days by visiting him. You smile at the thought of catching him off-guard.

“Sure, why not?”

The summer air of June was starting to make itself present despite already cooling significantly due to the sun saying its goodbyes an hour or two ago. Bright lights scattered across the vast street, a mixture of car lights, building lights, and streetlights morphing into the familiar image of a city that everyone knew. You walked towards the set peacefully, effectively going under the radar with a black mask covering your face. It was just a few steps more until you reached the barricade, when a familiar voice called out your name.

“Y/N?” Eunha squinted her eyes to determine if it really was you, only for you to watch them widen in surprise when her conclusion was proven correct. “Oh, it is you!”

You waved as you got closer. “Hi, Eunha. I saw you guys while passing by and thought I’d give you a visit,” you say shyly. Eunha beamed at your explanation.

“That’s so sweet of you; you’re always welcomed here!” She gives you a hug, quickly separating to drag you over the barricade. “Come on, I’ll show you to the others.”

Witnessing the set as a visitor was interesting. Despite the multiple people that greeted you on the way, it still felt as if you were an outsider with a V.I.P. pass to tour the set. Normally, you would be somewhere near the center, where the main scene was going to be shot. So staying back and watching the other crew members do their own things on the outskirts of that area was a new experience. In a way, you felt giddy like a child on a field trip.

“Actress Y/N is here!”

Eunha’s ecstatic voice traveled throughout the main area of the set, catching the attention of the directors, who had a figure you knew all too well standing right beside them. His eyes snapped up from the monitor D.O.P. Bang was showing him, eyes searching around for yours. Once he caught sight of your face, his eyes lit up.

“Y/N?”

If anyone asks, you totally weren’t checking him out. The clean black office suit he was wearing was incredibly flattering on his features, along with the formal brush-up the hairstylists put his hair in. You had only seen him with his hair down for the past few days—with his character supposedly portraying the look of someone who was comfortably back home to rest. And while that Seungmin was also objectively handsome, the way his hair was framing his face right now was stirring something more inside of you. Swallowing the feeling away, you straightened yourself.

“Hi, Seungmin.” You laughed. “Missed me?”

Seungmin abandoned his post with the directors and sped towards you. “Why are you here? It’s getting late,” he says, worried. Seungmin lets his eyes wander behind you for a second before a frown finds its way to his face. “And where’s that damned manager of yours?” You sighed at his obvious complaint.

“When are you going to let down on Changbin?” You say, unamused. “I swear, he means well. I came from the company, so he’s guarding the car since it’s just on hazard.”

“Still—” Seungmin tries to argue, only to be cut off by you waving your finger like he had been a bad child.

“Stop that. We talked about your coddling.”

He clicks his tongue in disapproval. “Maybe I’d stop once you actually learn how to take care of yourself.”

A series of claps interrupted the conversation you two were having. “Okay, break it up, lovebirds,” Minho says while inserting himself between you two. “It’s so nice to see you again, Actress Y/N. But we have a crew celebration dinner to attend, so I’ll borrow Seungmin first over here.”

Your co-star resists his manager, staying firmly on spot to prove a point. “Wait, I’ll walk her back to her car first.” Minho gave him an odd look.

“What do you mean walk her back?” He questions. “She’s attending. You just need to get changed out of that suit.” It was your turn to look confused.

“Huh?”

That was how you suddenly found yourself sitting at a long barbecue restaurant table with the other female crew members, silently listening to their energetic conversations while downing as much meat as you could. You didn’t know if this was a curse or a blessing in disguise, but you would surely regret it if you didn’t make the most of what was handed to you. Free food is still free food, even if it was a sponteneous invitation from the directors.

“I’m so happy we finished filming!” The woman assigned to your makeup, Yerin, said aloud. “Now it's those computer bastards’ turn to slave away.”

You couldn’t help but feel guilty for a portion of her hardships. “Once again, I apologize for all the trouble I caused you on set.” You slightly bowed while still sitting. “Hopefully, it will be better the next time we get to work together.” Yerin only waved off your apology.

“Oh, please—don’t be such a worrywart! Having you on set was a delight,” she squeals. “Plus, we had a blast seeing the development between you and Actor Kim Seungmin.” Eunha’s face quickly turned into one of horror.

“Yerin!”

You paled at her words. “I’m sorry, what?”

What did she mean by that? The inside of your mind turned into a battlefield at Yerin’s implication. Your eyes immediately turned to search for Changbin, feeling the need to inform him of a possible issue in the near future. In your experience in the industry, scandals always started like this. You didn’t want this to affect Seungmin’s career negatively, so it was always better to prepare early than late.

“Don’t listen to her, Y/N,” Eunha frantically says, trying to get a hold of her co-worker. “She’s just drunk.”

Yerin pushed her hands away, albeit weakly. “Eunha, stop being such a party pooper,” she whines. “We all know they’re dating now. Oh, our crew has tight lips, though! We won’t sell you guys or something.” That didn’t ease the panic that had already formed in your stomach.

“We’re not dating.”

You could only watch as Yerin’s showed genuine shock at your revelation. “Wait, for real?” She gasps. “That’s too bad. You two look great together!”

“Yerin, seriously!”

“Sorry, I’ll just go get some fresh air.” You excused yourself as politely as you could before standing up to head out the front door.

The now-cooled air pricked at your skin, making you breathe a bit more easily than in the humid interior of the restaurant. You lowered yourself to the narrow road’s curbside, choosing to sit down and admire the quiet neighborhood’s lights. It felt a lot better out here than inside, making you feel guilty for not enjoying the celebration more than you should have as one of the main characters for the project.

If you had refused, it would’ve been a bad look. You didn’t have a schedule for the night to use as a reason, and lying to the people who gave you the opportunity to work on your biggest project yet was out of the question. At the same time, you think of what you would’ve been doing instead if you had said no to their dinner offer. Laying down in your apartment while eating takeout wasn’t such a bad scene. The sliding of the aged wooden door brought you out of your thoughts.

“See? Just what I said,” a monotonous voice pointed out. “No self-preservation skills whatsoever.”

You rolled your eyes at the comment. “It’s just the outside of a family-owned barbecue establishment, Seungmin. There’s practically no one out here at this time.”

“Does that not make it worse?” He gave you a look of disapproval, crouching down slowly to join you on the curbside. “You have a knack for making people worry, do you?”

“Then stop worrying!” You snapped—his words reminding you of the situation you had just fled from to find peace.

Seungmin raised his hands in surrender. “Woah,” he exclaims. “Alright, something is clearly wrong. Talk to me.”

You could only turn away, feeling yourself unable to face him. It was an awkward subject to bring up, and you told yourself that Yerin had already promised that the crew was tight-lipped. Objectively, there was nothing more left for you to worry about. Subjectively, the implication bothered you. Seungmin furrowed his eyebrows at your reaction.

“Hey,” he calls out softly. “Did someone say something to you back there? You know I can beat them up, right?”

You grimaced at his attempts to comfort you. “You’re so violent,” you frowned. “What if it was a woman?”

“Oh, then I’m out of that. Sorry.”

“So full of shit, that’s what you are.”

Seungmin chuckled. “And that I am,” he replies, amused. “But seriously, I’m all ears if you want.”

A bitter taste announced its presence on your tongue, your mind forming a whirlpool of thoughts once again. “Why? Since we’re friends?” You spat out.

The space around you turned silent with Seungmin’s lack of response. You fought the urge to give him a discrete glance, just to see the damage you created. It took a few more seconds of the evening breeze being the only one talking between you two before Seungmin eventually spoke up.

“I’ll let you in on a secret,” he says in a low voice while running a hand through his hair to pull it back. His hairstyle from earlier was long gone, leaving you to wonder how he got rid of the hairspray so easily. “I actually don’t like that we’re friends.”

He watched as you deflated rapidly at his confession.

“Not in that way!” Seungmin splutters. “It’s just that I—ugh.” He brought up a palm to rub across his face.

Now, you were lost. The path of where the conversation was going became lost to you, making you stand in uncharted territory. Seungmin stayed silent for a few more seconds, trying to collect his thoughts. You let him have the time.

“You might curse at me for this or even put a distance between ourselves. But since this is our last day seeing each other on set until the movie’s release, I’ll take the chance now before I end up regretting I didn’t.”

“Seungmin, what—”

“The thought of staying just friends with you has been bothering me for a while now. It was like I was subjecting myself to my own personalized torture, where I couldn’t get away even if I tried. I’m still not sure what this entirely means for me—for us, but what I know is that platonic would never satisfy me at this rate.” He purses his lips, contemplating how to continue.

Eventually, Seungmin raised his head slightly to meet your eyes. “It’s odd. Admittedly, I’ve had my fair share of romantic relationships in the past, yet none of them could compare to what I was feeling now. At first, I thought it was just an obsession with you. Something that stemmed from my previous interest in you back at our senior level of academy—”

“You had a what?”

“I know,” he laughs humorlessly. “My friends used to tease me that I had a crush; that was why I was bothering you so much. Back then, I just brushed them off as jokes, telling them I only saw you as a rival. Well, look where that ended up.”

You were frozen in shock at his confession. “Seungmin,” you start. “I don’t know what to say.” He shakes his head.

“You don’t have to. Just let me have this moment to pour everything out,” he says. “Y/N, to put it into words, I feel at ease when I’m with you. At the same time, it always felt as if I was constantly worried about when it would end. That I would be left on my own again once you had finished your business with me. I tried to reason with myself, to put an acceptable distance between us in the case that what I had wasn’t the best for you. But I couldn’t do it, Y/N. Every time your voice entered my ears, it was like becoming a child. Unable to control their emotions and doing things without a second thought just because it felt like the right thing to do at the moment.” Seungmin looks up to the sky.

“That kiss we had—I think it was the happiest I’ve been in a while. It might have been just a job to you, because you could say it really was, but for me, it was finally a chance to express everything I had been holding back for the past few days. All I want you to remember is that nothing from that act was faked,” he exhales. “I really don’t think this is something you feel for a friend, so—”

“Let’s see where this takes us.”

“—What?”

“I’m not sure how you expect me to top what you just told me, but I’ll try with my own words.” You teased him with a genuine smile. “Seungmin, I feel strikingly similar to what you feel about me. Just maybe not as intensely yet.”

You let yourself move at the need to cup his face as he continues to look at you in shock. “I’m sure you already know that I spent quite a long time hating your guts, so the fact that I even started to feel an attraction towards you was shocking, to say the least. I was never one to believe in fictional tropes, despite my lifelong yearning to experience a love like that even once. As an actor, I’ve made a career out of acting those scenes out for people to see. But also as an actor, I knew more than anyone else how much real life would never be able to compare to the scripts I’ve seen brought to life on set. They were methodological, a feeling so carefully put together to achieve its maximum potential—real life isn’t like that.” You inhale deeply.

“Things happen for no reason, like they don’t for no reason either. And in a way, I felt both with you.” Your hands lowered themselves towards his hands to hold them tightly. “Enemies-to-lovers? It was laughable at first, but as the days went on, everything just fell into place as if it always belonged there. You feel like a child in front of me? I feel like I’ve never felt warmth in my entire life until you came along. When I first got out of the car yesterday, it was only then that I described urban life as cold and lonely in my entire life. I thought that maybe it was because I got too attached to the homey feel of the countryside that everything I’ve ever known somehow became foreign in a few days. But maybe it was just because of you.”

You found yourself giggling at the dumbfounded look he still had on his face, mind slow to take in what was happening in front of him. “What I’m saying is that I would love to see where this takes us. Right now, you can’t expect me to fall in love all of a sudden, especially considering our past. Though if you try hard enough, perhaps that might be just around the corner. What do you say?” Seungmin finally broke free from his trance, eyes watering.

“I’ll show you hard work that you’ve never seen before in your life.”

“And I believe it.” You pinch his cheek before standing up. “Now, let’s go back inside? The party is still ongoing.”

Seungmin clumsily follows, calling out just in time before you opened the door. “Wait—I still don’t have your number.” You gave him an astounded stare.

“Seriously?” You breathe out. “We went through all that, and we still don’t have each other’s numbers?”

Seungmin voices out his offense. “Well, I’m sorry that I was missing all my shots!”

“So, does that mean you’re gonna take a shot now, loverboy?”

“For you, yes.”

taglist 🔖— thank you for waiting ! 🫶

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[myseungsunglove]

I Know, Jagiya | Ksm

Pairing: Seungmin x Reader

Warning: fluffy fluff

𖠫Summary: Confessing your love for someone is always a risk.

✎A/N✎: just some late night runaway thoughts that I let out for the first time in a while. Haven’t just written what I was thinking in the moment in a long time. So don’t mind my 3 AM soft thoughts. I’m just soft for Kim Seungmin.

◠ ◡ ◠᭚ιαᵕ̈

「©  April 22, 2024 by myseungsunglove」

You lay in the dark, unable to sleep while your boyfriend sleeps peacefully beside you. You watch the slow rise and fall of his broad chest and can’t help but scoot closer to him in the darkness, placing a hand on his chest, your face settling right next to his. You gently press your lips against is warm skin and revel in the peace it brings you.

Kim Seungmin grounds you in every possible way a person could. As you lay there listening to the melody of his breathing you are made starkly aware just how in love with him you are. You’ve never said as much to his face, but in the moment you feel overwhelmed by the feeling.

The dark seems like the safest place to make this confession. Seungmin is asleep and he doesn’t need to know yet just how over the moon he makes you. You kiss his jaw softly, peppering a little trail up to his ear.

“I love you, so much Kim Seungmin,” you breathe out gently, barely above a whisper. Your secret released into the darkness as your hand runs up and down the length of Seungmin’s chest.

You feel movement as Seungmin slowly reaches up and squeezes your hand gently, threading your fingers together on top of his chest.

His head turns toward you, his eyes blinking slowly as he adjusts to the darkness of the room.

“I know, jagiya,” he whispers back, his voice low and gravelly with sleep. He leans forward and presses a soft kiss to your lips not once, not twice, but three times before his arms find you in the dark, wrapping around your waist and pulling you into his embrace. “I love you too,” he confesses and you breathe a sigh of relief against his lips.

With the confession off your chest, sleep embraces you as Seungmin does, pulling you into his chest with a satisfied and content sigh.

#stray kids #kim seungmin #seungmin #stray kids x reader #seungmin x reader #kim seungmin x reader #my bias #seungmin fluff #seungmin drabble #seungmin one shot #seungmin fanfiction

[therhythmafterthesummer]

A Helping Hand (M) ~Seungmin

Pairing: LabHybrid!Seungmin x GN!Reader Themes: Smut | Fluff | Best Friends to Lovers | Roommates to Lovers Word Count: ~4k | AO3 Synopsis: After one too many shots of vodka, your best friend confided in you a little problem he’d been dealing with for a couple of months now. Tipsy-you figured that you were more than suitable to give him a helping hand. Warnings: mentions of alcohol consumption · overall hybrid shenanigans · Seungmin has a dirty mouth · pet names · Smut (warnings under the cut). let me know if i missed any💜

Author’s Note: can’t believe my first ever published Seungmin fic is a hybrid au lmao. got a weird boost of inspiration for this after seeing @starlostseungmin talking about it, so here it is ! Special thanks to @notastraykid for giving her very valuable input to improve the first draft, as well as @comet-falls for letting me know it didn’t suck skjdfhsdkjf

Due to all the abovementioned warnings, this story is intended for an adult audience only. Minors please do not interact.

Smut Warnings: this is, as usual, some monsterfuckery · handjobs · praising · breeding kink (kind of) · hybrid anatomy (knot) · copious amounts of fluids. again, let me know if i missed any

Disclaimer: the story represented in this work does not represent Stray Kids in any way; anything described in this story and all actions performed by the characters are purely fictional, this was created just for good fun.

“You–You don’t have to do this, serious–Oh, God…”

You swallowed, focusing on your best friend’s face. Focusing a bit too much on the vein that popped on his neck when he threw his head back, on how pretty his eyelashes looked when his eyes fluttered shut, on those pouty lips of his you totally didn’t wish you could have on yours… All while trying to ignore what you had between your hands, all while trying to ignore the obscene, squelching sounds their continuous movement produced…

“I said I’d help you, didn’t I, Seungmin?”

Seungmin inhaled deeply. His ears twitched, his tail seemed to have a life of its own, it had started thumping against the headboard of the bed the moment he’d sat down and you’d taken a hold of him.

After opening his eyes again, Seungmin looked at your face, and you saw his Adam’s apple bob when he swallowed. “You did”.

“And I always keep my word, don’t I?” You twisted your wrists, never stopping the motions of your hands.

Seungmin sighed, and some of the tension in his shoulders seemed to evaporate with the motion. “You do…”

A spark of doubt flared in your mind, large enough it was impossible to ignore. Your hands stopped, and the tiniest whine left Seungmin’s mouth. “Unless you… Are you feeling uncomfortable? I can– I can stop”.

Seungmin’s hands flew to your wrists, preventing you from pulling away completely. “No. No, no, please, don’t… I… Fuck, I really want this. I really, really need this”.

You would’ve never expected the afternoon to take you here… To your best friend’s bedroom, to him sitting on his bed, with his back against the headboard, and with his legs spread. You would’ve never expected to have his cock in your hands, barely even out of his lounge shorts. In your mind, this had never been a real, genuine possibility. Yet here you were.

How long had it been since you realised you had a crush on your best friend? Too long, probably. It might’ve been a bit embarrassing, but you truly couldn’t even remember a time when you weren’t pining over him, a time when you weren’t thinking how it would be like to be with him physically, intimately…

Although, to be fair, this situation was far more sterile than all those fantasies you’d allowed your mind to wander into only in the wee hours of the night. It wasn’t as if Seungmin had confessed his feelings for you, or you to him. It was more like… like you were giving your friend a hand–literally and figuratively.

Seungmin was a hybrid. A black labrador hybrid, to be exact. He’d been your best friend since you were a kid, when the school you attended finally started allowing hybrids as students. You could still remember the first day you saw him, standing in a corner by the lockers. You’d approached him, mostly because your mother had taught you that hybrids must be treated well, just like you’d treat anyone else.

He was a shy boy, totally out of character for a lab hybrid, but the more you got to know him, the more he warmed up to you, the more you started to see that bright personality of his. As soon as he’d deemed you trustworthy, it was almost like that shyness had never been there in the first place.

He started to come over to your place to hang out or do homework, to open up about his life, and even to show more of his mischievous side. He’d call you everything from dumb dumb, to human kiddo, to little human, just because he could. But it was fine.

Even if at the beginning it annoyed you that he simply wouldn’t call you by your name, it eventually became such a Seungmin thing to do, you just couldn’t find it in you to be mad at him when his eyes sparkled so brightly whenever he used his little nicknames for you.

Seungmin was chaotic, he was funny, and he was the most loyal friend you’d ever had. He’d been with you through thick and thin. Every broken friendship and relationship, he was always there to console you, to hold your hand and tell you it was going to be alright. He was always there for you, without fail. He’d always joke around and say it was one of his lab traits, but you knew better.

Whether he was a hybrid or not, you knew Seungmin would still be the same Seungmin.

Your Seungmin.

A couple of years ago, you finally got to move out of your parents’ house. It was only natural that you ended up renting a place with your best friend, considering he, too, wanted to move out, and he didn’t particularly enjoy the thought of living with strangers.

Decades had passed since hybrids were integrated into human society. They finally had rights, they were treated as people and not some pet you bought from a store–no disrespect to pets, they had their rights, too. But pets weren’t people. Hybrids, on the other hand, were.

Hybrids had free will, they could reason like humans could, and they certainly deserved to be treated as equals. These were the values that you’d been taught as you grew up, and it was something you believed in still to this day.

Regardless, hybrids still had their animal urges and needs, which Seungmin seemed to have been struggling with for a couple of months now.

The confession happened last night, while you both threw a tennis ball back and forth at each other, after one too many shots of vodka–to be more precise, it’d been three. Three shots of vodka only. 

Alcohol wasn’t deadly toxic to Seungmin like it was to other hybrids, but his body certainly couldn’t digest it very well, which usually manifested not only in the flush that spread all over his face, but also by shutting down every single one of his filters. ‘I haven’t been able to come in two fucking months. Two months! I feel like I’m dying, dude. I just need to blow’.

You’d asked him how that was even possible, how he had not managed to bring himself to orgasm in two months, considering you knew he was a person with a moderate sex drive–based on the amount of times you had to stay in your shared flat while he had company over… His answer was a very graceful ‘The fuck if i know… Nothing works, my dearest little human. Porn doesn’t work. Literature doesn’t work. And my imagination clearly doesn’t work, either’.

He looked genuinely distressed about it, especially when he sighed, and his tone lowered. ‘I’ve been checking forums online… Going anonymous to ask strangers, specifically other hybrids, but most of them said that I needed to find the root cause, that something in my environment could be affecting my physical performance, but it’s… It’s really frustrating, because I genuinely have no idea what’s going on’.

‘Have you tried, I don’t know, getting laid?’ was what your tipsy self asked. You wouldn’t have asked that question fully sober for sure. You really didn’t want to know if Seungmin was out there getting laid these days. It had been a little over a year since you had seen him date anyone, and the thought of him dating someone now, admittedly, made you jealous. Which was potentially very stupid on your part considering you were just friends. The best of friends. Only friends.

‘Nah. Can you imagine if I’m with someone and I can’t fucking come? Distress… Besides, I don’t want to just… You know, do it with a random person. People are kinda… ew’. You could understand completely why he wouldn’t want to go out and hook up with a stranger. After all, some people still saw hybrids as sex slaves, or they were heavily fetishised, so it wasn’t exactly safe to partake in one night stands for him. 

Besides, your best friend was not one for hookups and one night stands in the first place. He had trust issues, especially with humans, so you could definitely understand his predicament. 

‘What if it’s someone you know?’ You threw the ball back at him just as you’d boldly asked the question, because spirits always made you voice things sober you would never have the guts to say.

Seungmin caught the ball and scoffed, completely sure that no one he knew would want to be that intimate with him, and not think ill of him if he didn’t manage to perform. 

But you had to open your big mouth again, very confidently telling him ‘And what about me? I can do it’.

The ball suddenly fell from Seungmin’s hand, landing on the floor and rolling under the coffee table. His eyes followed the movement like a hawk–or, maybe it’d be more accurate to say like a dog. He stretched his body a bit out of the sofa, not even bothering to stand up fully, trying to get the ball while he chuckled, maybe a bit nervously.

Seungmin genuinely thought you were joking for a second. That was exactly what he’d told you, but then he saw how serious you were about it, and, after a few minutes of silence, he simply said that you should have this conversation sober.

Which you did.

Which took you right here, right into his room, with his painfully hard cock in your hands.

Seungmin knew you wouldn’t judge him if he couldn’t come. He trusted you enough to be vulnerable with you in more ways than one, to tell you what he needed or wanted, so you would gladly help him–the fact that you had a major crush on him made you feel a bit self-conscious, you’d admit… Like you were taking advantage of the situation to touch him this intimately. But you had already offered it, and he had already accepted it, so you just didn’t feel like backing down on your word.

“Tighten your grip a bit more”, Seungmin mumbled, and once again he threw his head back when you did as asked and continued working his cock. “Fuck, yeah. That’s it…”

You were starting to heat up yourself. Especially whenever he spoke like that, with the tone of his voice as low as it was. Seungmin was one to swear a lot, very openly, but in this context, it certainly felt… filthier. And it affected you. Maybe embarrassingly so…

You couldn’t help but swear under your breath when your eyes drifted from his face to his length. How could you not look? When he was there, letting you touch him…

Clear fluid leaked from his tip, dripping all over your fingers and aiding your movement, intensifying those sinful wet sounds that resonated in your ears with each stroke. You knew his specific breed tended to produce more fluids than a human would, he’d told you this before in passing, but you had honestly not expected it to be this much.

Seungmin didn’t seem fazed at his slick soiling his clothes. On the contrary, it seemed like he didn’t even care at all.

“Like what you see?”

Your head snapped upwards to meet his eyes, and you immediately felt heat rush to your cheeks. 

“I’m sorry, I’m trying really hard not to look, but…” You suddenly felt small under his gaze, even if your hands didn’t stop. His eyes were so dark, staring right into yours so intensely the hairs at your nape stood on end.

Seungmin always tried not to look people in the eyes, ‘It activates this primal instinct in me, it’s a bit annoying sometimes, to be honest. I only make eye contact when… when I… Well, you know…’ He’d said once, very vaguely, but even back then, you understood. 

He didn’t need to tell you in which situation he enjoyed eye contact. Whenever you looked him in the eyes, you always felt trapped under his gaze, like you wanted to submit. And, somehow, it also woke the butterflies in your belly. Right now, that feeling seemed to have heightened tenfold.

“You’re trying not to look, but…?” Seungmin licked his lips, reaching forward to take a hold of your forearm. Not to stop you, but simply to drag his thumb over your skin in soothing motions.

“But…” You swallowed. You figured now was as good a time as any to let the thoughts out of your head, otherwise they would haunt you forever. “You’re so big”.

Seungmin giggled, a sound that he hardly ever let anyone outside of his close friend group hear, the flush on his face deepened, and his eyes crinkled at the corners. Adorable, even in this context… “You think I’m big?”

“Haven’t touched someone this big ever”, your pace was still slow, but you made sure to stroke as much of him as you could, as tight as he had asked you to. It wasn’t like he was crazy big, he wasn’t particularly long, but he was just… girthy. Girthier than you had ever seen in your pathetic excuse for a love life. “Not only that, but… It’s just… pretty”.

At that, Seungmin looked genuinely incredulous. “Pretty?”

“Mm… pretty”.

He was going to speak, but before he could, your movements sped up, and the whine that left his mouth as soon as you did had your insides instantly firing up. It was a completely involuntary reaction, how could your body not react when the sounds coming out of his mouth were this sinful? When the almost canine whines stirred the butterflies flying freely in your belly?

“Oh, fuck… That’s it, baby, just like that, shit…”

You didn’t even acknowledge the pet name that just escaped his lips. You were convinced it was a heat of the moment thing, so you swallowed that saliva that had suddenly pooled in your mouth, and continued to focus on your motions. 

With both of your hands, you went from the base to the head a few times, until you settled one of your hands at the base and the other at the tip. You had heard that the base of a canine hybrid’s cock was sensitive, not as much as the head, but much more than a human’s would be, and Seungmin’s wagging tail and content sighs proved that to be true.

You made sure to pull the foreskin with you when you pumped his head, and your eyes naturally drifted to the sight again. Pretty, indeed…

“You’re so fucking good at this, fuck…” Seungmin’s head was tilted back against the headboard, but he was still looking at you through his lashes. His chest rose and fell with his laboured breathing, he was essentially panting, his tongue poked out from between his lips, and the movement of his thumb on your forearm had long since stopped. He was now just gripping your arm, lightly digging his fingers on your skin.

“You think so?” You couldn’t help but ask.

Maybe it was a bit selfish, but you definitely wanted to hear more of his praise. It fed a pool of arousal in the pit of your stomach that you just knew you’d have to deal with as soon as you were on your own and away from his prying eyes…

“Fuck, yeah… You’re so good to me, so…” His words trailed off, stopped when he swallowed thickly. 

You wanted him to continue what he was going to say, you almost asked him to, but before you could, he spoke again–with an edge of desperation in his voice that almost made you faint.

“Squeeze a bit harder at the base”, so you did, twisting your wrist as you went up and down, and the loud moan that fell from his mouth made you dizzy with need. “That’s it, keep doing that, fuck…”

You worked his cock for a while, all as words of appreciation continued to fly past his lips, all as his slick kept dripping all over your fingers, as he directed more pet names your way. Until something started to feel different…

“Oh, oh, fuck… Fuck, shit, don’t stop, baby, please, don’t…”

You wouldn’t have dared stop, not when your fingers suddenly weren’t able to touch where you held him. You kept the motions on the head of his cock, but the base seemed to be swelling under your grasp, loosening it a bit.

“No, no, don’t stop there. Squeeze it. Keep touching it, pup”, Seungmin pleaded, tightening his grip on your arm while small whines escaped his throat, almost drowned by the sound of his tail thumping against the headboard.

“Oh, my God…” You knew hybrids were anatomically different to humans, but you had never really considered just how much they could be, so it really took you by surprise.

You were experiencing one of Seungmin’s hybrid attributes first hand. There, at the base of his cock, a knot was quickly swelling, and you would’ve never expected how much the sight and feel of it could affect you. Your mind raced, suddenly curious as to how it would feel like if he were pushing his cock into your warmth, how he would stretch you out to your absolute limits…

Seungmin might’ve been the hybrid here, but you were certainly salivating at the feel of his swollen knot in your hands.

Tightening your grip around his knot, you started massaging it, just as you pumped his head faster, coaxing a string of groans and moans and swears to come out of Seungmin’s mouth.

“Your hands… They’re so soft, so… perfect. That’s perfect, pup, you’re doing so fucking well”.

Seungmin was talking to you like you weren’t the one working him up. It would’ve amused you, had it not been feeding the fire that was burning bright deep within yourself.

You could feel your underwear sticking to your skin, drenched in your own fluids because of Seungmin, and the sounds he was making, and his heavy cock under your hands, and that fucking knot of his…

“Seungmin… Shit, you… This…” Being honest, you were speechless. 

“What? Huh?” Seungmin finally let go of your arm, instead he cupped your cheek, making you look at him, just as he started to thrust up into your fists. “I know what you want to tell me. Or, at least, I think I do, fuck… I can hear how fast your heart is beating, pup. I can smell it all, you know? I wanna know what you’re thinking. Tell me”.

You licked your lips, staring into his eyes. You were sure your face couldn’t be any warmer, yet the heat seemed to spread further the longer you looked at him, the faster you moved your hands and he thrusted into your grip.

“I’m… Fuck, I can’t help but think how it would feel like inside me, stretching me open…”

“Oh, shit–” Seungmin threw his head back. His tail thrashed against the headboard, and his ears were twitching nonstop. “I can–Fuck, baby, I can give it to you. Whatever you want, just say it and I’ll give it to you”.

With your lower lip trapped between your teeth, you took in a deep breath, almost shivering when Seungmin pulled his shirt up to reveal his torso just as he mumbled the most desperate “Close, so fucking close, puppy. Don’t you dare fucking stop. Tell me–tell me more…”

“I want… want your knot… I want you, Seungmin. So much, so, so much. Need you”, you emphasised each statement with a tighter squeeze to the swollen base of his length.

“Oh, fuck!”

With a few more thrusts of his hips, and a few more twists of your wrists, Seungmin gave you a quick warning, only for your name to fly past his lips, and explode seconds after. Thick ropes of cum spurted from the tip of his cock, painting his torso in the creamy substance and dripping all over your hands. It was so much cum, more than you had ever seen anyone ever produce.

The sounds coming out of his mouth were absolutely pornographic, they entered your ears and shot straight to your aching, needy insides. Needy for Seungmin, for his knot, and his everything.

You kept working his cock, pumping the tip to make sure every drop of his cum came out, squeezing and stroking his knot through it all. Until Seungmin’s body slumped against the headboard.

The movement of your hands stopped, but you didn’t remove them. The sight was straight out of a wet dream, his torso, his shirt, his shorts, your hands, everything was covered in cum, and you suddenly had the urge to taste it. But you begrudgingly resisted that urge, this was probably not the moment for that.

When you finally looked away from the mess, your eyes found Seungmin’s. His chest rose and fell with his ragged breaths, his lips were slightly parted as he gasped for air, and he was looking so deeply into your eyes you simply couldn’t look away.

You weren’t sure who moved first, maybe it was you, or maybe it was him… Or maybe, it had been both.

Before you knew it, Seungmin’s soft, moist lips were on yours, kissing you like a starved man. And you retaliated, of course. You kissed him with the same enthusiasm he had, licking his bottom lip to get your tongue inside his mouth, and very quickly, you started to feel lightheaded.

Kissing Seungmin was better than you could’ve ever imagined. Hearing him and seeing him come was a transcendental experience, and you were sure that your brain chemistry had just been altered forever. How could you ever go back to anyone else after this?

The kiss was messy, sloppy, tongues intertwining and teeth sinking on soft skin, producing wet noises all around. You would’ve honestly loved to stay there forever, kissing him, with his length in your hands and his cum all over your fingers. Unfortunately, though, you needed to breathe, so you finally disconnected your lips from his, and took a deep breath.

Seungmin looked into your eyes, and you looked right back. They were still dark, still alluring, but there was something else, something softer… Maybe more vulnerable. The stare-off lasted for a few moments, a few moments spent in silence, until you both broke into a fit of laughter.

Seungmin was practically glowing, he looked possibly the most handsome you’d ever seen him. Even when he was covering the lower part of his face with his hand while he laughed, trying to hide that pretty smile of his after years and years of insecurities produced by the now long since removed braces on his teeth, you still found him incredibly handsome and adorable.

“I take it you enjoyed it? You must have. Look at this mess you made”, there was a teasing smile on your lips, but the truth was, you genuinely wanted to know. 

“As much as you enjoyed, it seems”, Seungmin scoffed, and he gestured between your bodies, where you were still holding his cock. He was still just as hard as he was before he came. 

“You’re still hard?” You couldn’t hide the surprise in your voice, nor the way your eyes widened at the sight, and it made Seungmin smirk immediately. 

“Baby, I’m a dog. My cock thinks it should be inside someone right now, keeping all my cum contained with my knot. Of course I’m still hard, it wants to breed”.

“To… to breed?” Your voice was airy, shaky, suddenly unable to contain the feeling of pure arousal you felt coursing through your veins.

“Mm… to breed”, Seungmin repeated, and he bit his lip when you started to gently squeeze and caress his knot.

He detached himself from the headboard just enough so he could pull his shirt off. After a few moments of silence, he spoke again. His gaze softened further, and he brought his hands to your cheeks so he could softly caress the skin with his thumbs. “Thank you. Fuck, I'm so grateful right now. That felt so good”.

“Oh, please… It was my pleasure”, you chuckled, finally letting go of the head of his cock so both of your hands could focus on giving attention to his knot, hopefully helping relieve any possible discomfort he might be feeling since it was out in the open, unable to fulfil its purpose. 

The motions clearly made Seungmin’s blush deepen. He looked at you for a few bated breaths, and before you could even understand what was happening, you were on your back, gasping in surprise. 

Taking his discarded shirt, Seungmin knelt on the bed, right between your legs, and he cleaned your hands, as well as his torso of as much of his cum as he could. 

“Your pleasure, pretty human, hasn’t even started yet. Let me make you feel as good as you just made me feel”.

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General Masterlist

#stray kids hybrid au #seungmin smut #seungmin fluff #seungmin fanfiction #seungmin fic #seungmin x reader #neverendingdreams #stray kids smut #stray kids fluff #stray kids fanfiction #skz x reader #skz fanfic #skz fanfiction #stray kids fanfic #hybrid seungmin #✨🌙✏

[sunshinebarbie]

reckless

pairing: Seungmin x reader warnings: language, arguing, angry Seungmin, angst, violent chopping of vegetables, mentions of a knife (nothing violent with it besides the vegetable chopping) words: 3,505

a/n: so i know i haven't updated my two long-awaited stories, but i wanted do something for now to keep you all entertained. hopefully it keeps you all occupied until i can get the next parts to my other stories updated. enjoy!

the clock on the bed stand hit another hour. you turned around already knowing that his side of the bed would be empty. you tugged the blanket up further burying yourself into a cocoon of warmth.  

your phone chimed illuminating the ceiling and the sound of the “ping” echoed in the darkness of the room. throwing the blanket off you reached for your phone hoping it was him. instead it was Jeongin. you frowned and opened the text, it took a second to load and you felt your stomach clench.  

“just thought i owed it to you.” his text followed. you scrolled up to the picture again and pressed to enlarge. yes, it was him. your boyfriend of three years Seungmin with his face nuzzled into the neck of his “friend”.  

“where are you!?” you quickly texted Jeongin. the message was delivered and read. after a long minute you texted again. “he said he was going to your place and you were both going to a friends’ is that the friend!?” the message was delivered and read again. still there was no reply.  

“Jeongin!” you texted after a long second, the message was undelivered. you felt your body go numb. the screen of your phone went black leaving you in complete darkness. You stared into the darkness at the ceiling, your thoughts racing. Reaching over to the lamp you clicked it on and swung your feet off the side of the bed.  

You walked over to the main switch and turned it on illuminating the whole room. you couldn’t possibly sleep now. slowly you paced the room, your thumbnail tucked between your teeth as you tried to figure out your next move. you walked over to your phone and pulled up Seungmin’s number. Your fingers hovered over the keyboard as you thought of a text to send.  

It could be full of venom, the scorned girlfriend with rants of “you cheater” or “it’s over”. or you could go the oblivious girlfriend who is still patiently waiting for her boyfriend to come home to her with texts of “when are you coming home?”. Instead you put your phone facedown on the bed and walked to the closet.  

Your first initial thought was “start packing, don’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry” slowly you began to pull items from the top shelves of closet. Empty boxes mostly, all in high places that only Seungmin could reach. you bit your lower lip and spotted the exact box you were looking for. it was a vintage Godiva chocolate tin. A gift from your grandmother that she filled with love letters and small tokens of love that were given to her by your grandpa or were collected over the many happy years they spent together.  

As you knocked it off the shelf you could hear the contents shuffle inside. You sat on the floor of the closet and lifted the lid. The letters and trinkets were now replaced with those of yours and Seungmin’s. Three years all placed delicately in the box that was once filled with fifty plus years of love. 

Your fingertips grazed the contents as you shifted the items finally spotting the one that felt like it was calling you. A simple lined paper that was ripped out of a notebook. Slowly you pulled apart the folds, the paper was thin from the many times you unfolded and refolded the paper over and over again, three years of unfolding and refolding.  

Your eyes skimmed the words, you could recite this entire letter word by word. It was the very first love letter Seungmin ever wrote to you. He was working hard on a new album with his group and had to stay at the dorms more than he would like. It was the beginning of your relationship, and he couldn’t leave you alone for a minute. His fear that you would grow tiresome of his job and move on had him writing to you every moment of free time he could spare. 

Your eyes skimmed until you found the sentence you were looking for… “I'm pretty sure I found my forever in you… I just confirmed it with I.N, you’re the only girl I want in my life. forever.” a salty tear drop fell on the paper soaking into the ink and distorting the word that hit you most “forever”. you sniffled and closed the paper you couldn’t stomach anymore.  

You quickly folded the paper back up and placed it back into the tin, as you reached for another one you could hear the key scrapping against the metal of the deadlock. Seungmin stumbled in and slurred something, he was drunk. You quickly tossed the boxes back up on the shelf along with the tin and hurried out of the closet. You could hear him stumbling in the kitchen looking for the fridge. You turned off the lights and hurried under the covers. 

As you steadied your breath Seungmin entered the room. He was cursing swears under his breath. He unzipped his pants and yanked them down to a pool around his ankles. He nearly tripped over the thick fabric pile as he stepped out. You could hear him fumble around fighting for freedom from his jeans until he was laying in the bed in nothing but his boxers, and hoodie.  

“babe?” Seungmin slurred a pet name for you which you never heard ever, since the three years you been together. You shift your shoulders giving the false appearance that he is disturbing your slumber. “I missed you so much” he sighed as he wrapped his arms around your body. You could feel his lips nuzzle into your neck. He pressed a sloppy kiss against the nape, giving the feeling of more of a snake bite than a loving kiss, because you knew his lips were on another’s neck merely an hour ago. You could smell the alcohol that radiated off his breath and skin as he snuggled closer to you. 

“babe, you should come with us next time” he yawned. “I missed you too much.” You shifted your shoulders again only for him to pull you closer to his chest. His cheek pressed softly against your ear. “I love you.” he slurred before falling into a deep alcohol induced slumber. 

The next morning you left some water and electrolyte water enhancer by his bedstand. You cooked him a simple breakfast of bacon, of course a lot of eggs, and some toast. You placed down some aspirin on the counter knowing he was going to need it after he ate his breakfast. Seungmin entered the kitchen, his lips wrapped around the rim of the glass of water you left for him. “what did you cook?” he asked almost coldly. “hangover special” you teased. Seungmin looked at the time and nearly choked on his water. “is that time right?!” he pointed to the clock on the stove. “yeah.” you replied. “you couldn’t wake me up earlier? I need to be at the JYPE building in five minutes! We’re supposed to go live to promote our comeback.” he hurried to the bedroom. 

You listened to him stumble around and cursing up a storm. He finally emerged from the room and slammed what was left of his water before grabbing the aspirin. “you aren’t going to eat?” you asked and pointed to his already made plate. “does it look like I have time to eat?” he snapped back and hurried out the door. 

You looked at the plate and felt a rage consume your insides. You grabbed the plate and tossed it into the trash can with enough force that it cracked the entire ceramic disk into three big chunks on impact. “I bet he doesn’t talk to his friend like this.” you scoffed as you started to clean up the kitchen before leaving to your part-time job. 

It was hard enough focusing on work, the picture I.N sent you was seared into your brain. Even when you closed your eyes to take deep breaths you could see it. You could only recall all the times he would hurry out of the apartment whenever his phone chimed, was he going to see her?. What about whenever you asked if you could tag along with him on his nights out and he would say you wouldn’t like it, was it because he wanted to be alone with her? Thinking about it too much made you nauseous, finally it was time to clock out.  

You arrived back at the apartment. Seungmin wasn’t back yet, you walked into the kitchen and began to pull items from the fridge and pantry to get dinner started. At least in the kitchen you could take out your aggression on the ingredients and not on Seungmin or his friend. You were chopping the veggies up when you heard Seungmin come back. He looked exhausted, and mostly in agony probably regretting having so much to drink last night.  

“hey, how was the live?” you asked as you checked the meat in the oven. “i missed it.” he sighed. “and I got my ass chewed out for that.” he added. “well, maybe dinner will make you feel better, I’m making your favorite.” you smiled. “i don’t like oven baked chicken.” he scrunched his nose before leaving to the room after seeing a message appear on his phone. You could feel that same rage boiling up again, but you ignored it, excusing his attitude since he was having a bad day. 

Seungmin returned to the kitchen moments later in a new outfit. He started to search the kitchen cabinets and slamming them, making you irritated by his carelessness. “did you pick up any banana kicks?” he frowned looking in the cabinet. “they didn’t have any at the store, but I did get some turtle chips.” you pointed to the bag. “yeah because those are the exact same thing.” he rolled his eyes before slamming the cabinet again. You bit your tongue, you wanted to blurt out “well I bet your friend has all your favorite snacks stocked up right?” but instead you continued to chop up the veggies for the salad.  

“as usual there is nothing here.” Seungmin gripped as he walked past you while typing on his phone. You put the knife down on the countertop and exhaled a deep breath. You went to the sink and started to rinse the stalk of broccoli. As you looked up at your reflection on the window you couldn’t help but transport back to when you and Seungmin first moved into the apartment. Well, you were living there a month before him but he insisted moving in with you because he couldn’t stand being away from you for too long. You remembered how he helped you cook your first ever meal in the house while living together. You could feel him standing behind you, his arms wrapped around your body as he pressed kisses on your exposed skin. You could almost hear the laughter that filled the atmosphere as he poured you both large glasses of wine to enjoy while you both waited for your masterpiece to finish cooking. 

“when’s dinner going to be ready?” Seungmin reentered the kitchen pulling you out of your memory. “in another 20 minutes or so.” you replied as you turned off the sink and went back to your place by the cutting board. “a pizza will be here in that same amount of time and it will be ready to eat.” he commented as he shoved his phone in his pocket. That was the final straw for you, the Seungmin in your memory, in the tin box upstairs was long gone, and the cause? Was likely he was out of love with you and in love with someone new.  

“hey, babe. Can you give me that bowl of broccoli in the sink, I was just washing them.” you looked up at Seungmin as you chopped into the veggies on the cutting board. “Babe?” Seungmin furrowed his eyebrows. “yeah, babe.” you forced and icy smile. “don’t you like that name?” you forced a chop making a loud tap against the wooden board. “no.” Seungmin replied coldly as he put the bowl of broccoli in front of you.  

The silence was as thick as the air in the kitchen as Seungmin found a place on the other side of the island parallel to you. He picked at the bowl of fruit trying to find one that he wanted to snack on while you cooked dinner. “babe.” you bit the tip of your tongue trying to stifle your chuckle. You grabbed one stalk of broccoli and chopped into the vegetable. “can I ask you a question.” you began to force your chops once again. “what?” Seungmin sighed dropping the fruit in his hand back into the bowl.  

“are you-” you gulped trying to find the courage you had a minute ago when you were calling him the nickname he clearly hated. Seungmin raised his eyebrows waiting for you to spit out your question. “are you fucking your friend?” you asked and looked up at him with a stone face.  

“what??” Seungmin’s face twisted with confusion. “are you deaf suddenly?” you stabbed the tip of the knife into the wooden board. Seungmin was speechless, or scared either way he knew he was caught. “are you fucking your friend?” you asked again this time asking more slowly. You pulled the knife from the board and set it down on the countertop. You could feel your anger boiling in your stomach, like a bottle of soda filled with mentos. You held it down best you could, because you wanted an explanation before blowing up.  

Seungmin was quiet, he approached the counter cautiously and leaned against the edge. Seungmin stared blankly at the marble countertop, his palms resting on the cool surface. “Well?” Your lower lip trembled. Seungmin sighed as he dropped his head, a hot breath exhaled from his closed lips as he cleared his throat to finally speak. “I fucking hate these countertops” he mumbled quietly.  

“That’s it!?” You finally felt the anger escape the bottle in your stomach. “The fucking counter tops!?” Seungmin watched the cutting board of chopped veggies fly across the counter until it hit the wall. You made your way around the island and stood on your toes in front of him.  

“Who cares about the fucking counter tops!” You shoved Seungmin with whatever strength you had, not even moving him an inch. “Are you or are you not sleeping with your friend!?” You pushed him again. Seungmin looked away avoiding eye contact with you. He shook his head back and forth before taking a deep breath. “I never slept with her, but I have thought about it” he replied honestly and that hurt more than him actually doing it. “But we made out a few times” he looked at you, his eyes empty and heartless.  

“Made out? What are you guys middle school kids!?” You felt the tears drizzling down your face and gathering in pools under your chin. Seungmin turned away, refusing to see your tears, knowing damn well that he couldn’t threaten whoever caused them because he was the reason. Seungmin retreated to your shared bedroom, but you followed closely.  

“don’t worry about her y/n” you exclaimed as you followed him. “you’re the only girl for me.” you continued until you were both in the room. “does that sound familiar?” your voice trembled. “just drop it okay?!” Seungmin snapped back. “i won’t see any of my friends anymore if that’s what you want!” “you would like that wouldn’t you? Just me and you no one else, just isolated but hey as long as you’re happy and not insecure right?!” Seungmin’s words dripped with venom.  

“you are an asshole Kim Seungmin.” you sniffled and wiped away the tears that were falling down your face. “and you and your friend can both go to hell.” you spat before turning away and heading straight to the share dresser. “ladies and gentlemen we have reached the climax, where y/n packs her stuff and leaves.” Seungmin shouted to an invisible audience. “you’re not going anywhere.” he challenged. “you’re right.” you replied as you continued to throw items on the floor. You turned to Seungmin and kicked the pile towards his feet. “you’re the one who is going.”  

Seungmin looked down at the pile of clothes and identified his shirts, sweats and hoodies. “like hell.” he replied. “i put the money down for this apartment, it’s in my name, and I was the one who picked those counter tops!” you argued back. “now get the fuck out.” you walked to the closet and started to toss out his shoes. “and where do you expect me to go?” he started to pick up his things from the floor. “the dorms? Your friend’s? A hotel? To Hell?!, I don’t care.” you replied coldly. As you pulled down his duffle bag from the top shelf of the closet you pulled down the boxes you shoved back up there last night. 

Everything collapsed down around your feet, you tossed the duffle bag out to him and noticed the lid to the tin popped open, spilling the contents under the empty shoe boxes and hangers from the stuff you ripped off the rod that belonged to Seungmin. You leaned down and picked up some of the paper items before leaving the closet. Seungmin was trying to pick up his items as quickly as you were tossing them out.  

“you’re acting crazy y/n” Seungmin grunted as he shoved everything in the duffle bag you threw out to him. “then go be with someone who is sane.” you walked out of the room and into the living room. Seungmin was behind you, the dufflebag spilled out his clothing and shoes he tried to stuff in, in a hurry. You opened the door and pointed outside, the cold air of the night sending a chill down your spine. “get out.” you instructed. “you’re only going to call me in an hour after you cool off.” he raised an eyebrow. “fat chance.” you argued back. “get out!” you shouted again this time earning a look from the neighbor who was barely coming home.  

Seungmin put his shoes on and walked out the door. “you’re making a mistake y/n” he turned to face you again. “i don’t think so.” you pulled the papers in your hand up so he can see them. You ripped them down the middle before shoving them against his chest and slamming the door shut. Seungmin looked at the papers you just shoved into him and watched them fall to his feet. 

He was about to turn away and just leave it for you to clean up. Until he saw the one that unfolded upon being shoved into him. “you’re Green Tea Bon Deliceaux everyday of the week, and I can’t get enough of you-” the partially ripped paper read. Seungmin dropped his duffle and started to pick up the pieces of paper, his fingers swiped through the pile before finding the other half. “-you’re my favorite person, the only girl for me and I know it’s early to say but I love you.”  

Seungmin felt the dry lump in his throat realizing that the papers that were ripped by his feet and tossed out like trash were some of the letters he wrote to you every night while he was away from you on tour, on mandatory dorm overnights, or while he was having long days at the company building and just missed you. Seungmin gathered the papers and shoved them into the duffle bag, he stepped forward, his fingers balled into a fist hovering over the door. He wanted to knock, he wanted to knock until you grew tired of his knocking and answered. When you answered he wanted to wrap you in his arms and hold you tight enough and plead and beg for your forgiveness, he wanted to recite every letter for you over and over because he could remember each one from heart.  

Instead he stood frozen, he slowly lowered his fist and wrapped his hand around the strap of his bag before turning away and leaving down the stairs. Little to his knowing you were leaning against the door, holding your breath counting in your head the seconds it would take him to knock the door. After hitting fifty, you slowly opened the door and looked outside, he was gone, leaving no trace of his presence. 

You closed the door and brought the back of your hand to your nose as you sniffled and choked out a sob. You could feel the tears watering down your face, he was right you felt like you made the biggest mistake, you couldn’t help but feel like you just hand delivered him gifted wrapped nicely to his friend.  Yet, it wasn't all your fault completely, he was the one being reckless.

#kim seungmin x reader #seungmin x reader #seungmin imagine #seungmin imagines #seungmin angst #seungmin fanfiction #seungmin fanfic #seungmin fanfictions #stray kids angst #stray kids imagines #stray kids imagine #kim seungmin imagine #kim seungmin imagines #kim seungmin angst

[edenalieth]

i want to believe in forever

Pairing: Seungmin x reader

Genre: angst, hint of fluff

Warnings: none

Summary: Seungmin wants to move on from his heartbreak, however the colorful memories of you are holding him back. 

Words: 1.3K 

A.N: hello guys, cami in the building! it’s my first time writing a seungmin fic (@seungseung-minmin forgive me for not making a cuter one ;v;) it was mostly inspired by the song « the exit » by conan gray which i found really beautiful and true. sorry for the possible mistakes. hope you enjoy, feedbacks are always welcome! ♡ — 231217

He took another sip of the black coffee he was holding on his hand and grimaced. It was already half cold and far too bitter for his liking. For how long did he stare at those high limestone walls ? Apparently long enough for his coffee to turn bad. Spotting the closest bin, he threw the drink away, watching it fall as the lid opened spreading the brown liquid. The winter breeze made him shiver and he buried his hands deeper into the pockets of his coat, trying to warm them up. 

« You can do this, Kim Seungmin », the brown haired boy thought to himself. 

He climbed the stairs silently until he reached the ticket office. A young girl was reading. She was probably just starting her university course and needed this job to gain some money seeing her bored expression. She barely looked at Seungmin before nonchalantly putting down her book with a barely hidden sigh. 

« What can I do for you ? » she asked, visibly annoyed to be interrupted. 

Seungmin cleared his throat « Hmm, one adult ticket please. » 

He was tapping on the small counter with his fingertips, nervous. He was about to tell her that he had changed his mind and turn around but he had promised himself he would do this. It was necessary. Even if it hurt. He knew, he needed to detach his mind and feelings from this place and many others. 

« What is this book about ? » he said, trying some small talk while she was preparing the ticket. She put one out of the drawer of her desk and handed it to him, announcing the price. « Just a regular thriller. » Nothing more, nothing less. He paid and left without further ado. He was sure that, if you had been there, you would have managed to pick that girl’s interest, even just a little. That’s how you were, solar, attracting people around you like a magnet. However, you hadn’t been by his side for months now, he had to move on. 

When he entered the familiar hall, he was greeted by the unique scent of museum and all its splendor. Soon, he was surrounded by history and felt so little and insignifiant, as well as mesmerized by the beauty of those masterpieces he had seen so many times with you. When you used to call yourselves « us », you had made a ritual to visit this place once a month. The museum was big enough for you to always discover small details you hadn’t seen before or to explore the temporary exhibition. Since your breakup, he avoided this place like the plague. Yet here he was, feeling his heart clenching as he looked at the paintings. One of your favorite hobby was to tell him stories when you analyzed a canvas. Your imagination was overflowing and never missed to make him laugh, which sometimes made you incur the wrath of the visitors and security. No one was here to make him laugh today and loneliness weighed heavily on his shoulders. He didn’t have this talent. He would just skim through the description next to it. Colors seemed dull compared to the vivid memories of you, scarring his heart mercilessly. He felt his throat getting tight. He had chosen the museum to start his healing journey because he knew he wouldn’t be able to cry without being heard. He had shed tears more than he would even admit. Was it truly helping though ? Or what is it just him blowing on the embers of your lost love. 

He sat down on the leathered bench, facing your favorite art. It was a pretty simple one, a cottage on the countryside, using impressionism technique. The first time you saw it, you went strangely quiet. You were like absorbed by it. He remembered how you leaned on his shoulder, intertwining your fingers with his. « I can picture us living there. » you had softly whispered. « It would be the embodiment of our love, our safe place. Growing old together, laughs of our kids and grand-kids filling the rooms. Am I allowed to dream about this ? » your voice had seemed insecure, seeing you vulnerable like that was rare. « Yes and it will be our dream from now on. » he had replied, brushing his nose against yours before tenderly kissing you. Warmth had filled his body, his heart melting like ice under a scorching sun, your touch permanently marking his skin. A dream. Was it all it had been ? Just something made up by his cruel mind ? No. He still could remember the sensation of your skin on his, the scent of your shampoo, the little habits you had, the sound of your giggle. 

Recalling these memories was like torture. The grip he had on the bench became stronger, his knuckles turning white. If only he had noticed how left out you felt sometimes. Maybe, you would be next to him, still daydreaming about your perfect house. Or, perhaps, you just weren’t meant to build one together. This thought turned his vision into blurry shapes. « Shit ». He didn’t want to cry in public. He stood up hastily and looked for the exit. Wandering between the corridors, his steps echoing on the cold ground, the artworks seemed like moving stains. It was as if the walls were tightening around him and he was tempted to rush out of here to get some air. However, his run was abruptly stopped when the object of his obvious desire showed up. You. 

You were there. Your arm around the waist of someone who wasn’t him. His mind went blank for a second. It couldn’t be, right ? He swallowed the sobs that were trying to escape his throat, his hands shaking. He thought you were both sharing the same wounds, that you were still mourning your old feelings. His were surely not buried yet. Still, there was no mistaken. You looked happier now and you had already found someone to miss. He wanted to let himself drown into the abyss of his sorrow. He almost called out your name, every single letter which used to roll on his tongue like honey, addictive like a drug, tasted sour. He had to leash his heart not to break down and try to get you back again. He had tried but you already had built up a wall to protect your opened wounds. His were still raw. 

Were you going to tell this man the same stories you had told him ? Did your « I » became a « we » when you met him ? In fact, he didn’t want to know. He wanted to forget you for a time, to get strong enough to be able to talk about you as a young love that bloomed too fast and wilted in the process. He couldn’t blame you for getting everything you wanted. 

He stared at you, as your eyes spoke for you, full of some love that used to be his. Each step you took leading you towards your ideal. Deep down your heart, feels for Seungmin were still waiting to be set on fire again. However, the ones you had for your new lover were stronger and you wanted to cherish them. It was a painful sight for Seungmin and he wished someone would rip his heart for it to get numb. He had to let you go. He was still standing at the exit before he opened the glass door. 

Immediately, the cold bit his flesh, tears rolling down his cheeks and burning his skin. 

« I want to believe in forever » he thought, you just weren’t meant to be his. 

#seungmin #stray kids #skz #seungmin x reader #seungmin angst #seungmin fluff #seungmin fanfic #seungmin fic #seungmin fanfiction #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #seungmin stray kids #seungmin x y/n #seungmin scenarios #stray kids oneshot #stray kids au #fanfic #fanfiction #fluff #angst #smut #stray kids smut #seungmin smut #bangchan #lee know #changbin #hyunjin #han #felix #i.n

[aeliuss]

Not Rain nor Snow

Pairing: Seungmin x afab!reader

Genre: Angst (like seriously, ANGST)

Synopsis: when you moved to s.korea you didn't expect to fall in love. but fall in love you did, and you fell hard. but sometimes love isn't enough of a reason to stay.

Warnings: slight mentions of depression, mentions of pet death, break up

Notes: back with more angst lol. this was supposed to be short but then it spiraled into over 3k words. for some reason i feel like seungmin would be one of the first of the boys to fall in love, even though he's a menace. anyway, hope you enjoy! feedback is always appreciated :) also, let me know if you guys want a part 2!

(also the title is inspired by that one quote that goes, "People are not rain or snow or autumn leave. They do no look pretty when they fall down.)

When you were nineteen you fell in love with a boy who took his coffee black.

Stolen glances and flustered, sheepish grins turned into friendship. He visited the cafe you worked  at regularly. Sometimes everyday. But other times, he would disappear for months, without a trace, without a single text.  The third time this happened, you asked him if he worked for the Mafia.

He laughed, scratching the back of his neck. He told you he worked as a manager at an entertainment company. That sometimes, he had to go overseas. You were new to South Korea, so you didn't have many friends here, nor did you listen to the music much, so you believed him. And he was a good liar.

He asks you to be his girlfriend a year later at the park, watching the sun set. You were so happy you kissed him on the spot. He didn't kiss you back, so you pulled away, mortified, but he catches your wrist, pulls you against him, kisses you properly. Even though his entire face is flushed like a tomato, up to the tips of his ears. The setting sun bathes him in a golden glow. You think you might love him already.

--

When you were twenty you finally met his friends. Seven other boys who were nice enough but kept giving you odd glances when they thought you wouldn't notice. One of them cringes slightly when you ask if they also work in management. Seungmin swoops in, hand on your waist, changing the subject so smoothly you forget about their reactions completely.

You found it weird of course. The fact that when you asked him who exactly he managed, he waved the topic off, saying something about how he handles paperwork and that that would bore you. The fact that he never wanted to take you out to popular couple spots, and when you ever did go somewhere public, he wore a mask and a cap so low it hid his eyes sometimes. One time, you could've sworn you heard a high schooler call out his name at the amusement park, but before you could turn around, he is guiding you to the churro stand  and you're salivating too much to care.

You let all these things go. Brushed away the creeping doubts in your mind. Nothing else mattered but the fact that he loved you, you reasoned with yourself. He was sassy, and silver tongued, but he was gentle with you. Made sure you ate and slept well when it was exam week. Listened to you rant about the same thing for the nth time and acted like it was the first. Surely, whatever he was hiding couldn't be that bad if he loved you like this?

--

You were still twenty when you finally found out. Finally mingling enough with the other international students at your university to call a few of them 'friends.' One of the girls smiled when she saw your lock screen--a picture of Seungmin at the beach on one of your dates-- and said, "Oh, you're a Stay too!"

Your curiosity morphed into an insatiable need for answers. You delved into the labyrinth of the internet, searching for clues, hints, anything that could illuminate the shadowy corners of Seungmin's life that he had kept concealed from you. And there it was, in bold letters on your screen: "Stray Kids."

Your heart plummeted as you clicked on the link, revealing a world you had been oblivious to—a world of music, of stardom, of screaming fans and flashing cameras. And there, amidst the dazzling array of idols, was Seungmin, his face illuminated by stage lights, his voice like an angel sent from the gods themselves.

You felt like you had been blindsided, as if the ground had been yanked from beneath your feet. How could he have kept such a monumental secret from you? Was everything between you just a facade, a carefully constructed illusion? Was that why he had hesitated to bring you around his friends, why he only did when you practically begged to meet them?

Questions swirled in your mind like a tempest, each one more agonizing than the last. Why hadn't he trusted you enough to confide in you? Had your entire relationship been nothing more than a convenient distraction from his real life, his real identity?

And as you stared at the screen, at the image of Seungmin smiling back at you from behind the glossy veneer of celebrity, you couldn't help but wonder if you ever truly knew the boy who took his coffee black.

__

You were twenty one when you told him of your discovery. It's not that you waited long, rather that your birthday was actually right around the corner and Seungmin claimed that he had gotten the day off to spend it with you. He showed up at your apartment bright and early, carrying a bouquet of flowers--your favorite-- and smiling brightly.

"We could do anything you want," he was saying now, sitting on the edge of the tub as he watched you get ready, blinking the hair out of his eyes distractedly. "There's a place not too far from here that sells your favorite food. Opened recently but the reviews are pretty great."

There's a bubble of something sour in your chest, and you grip your hairbrush tightly at the handle. "I don't know."

He tilts his head in that adorable puppy-like fashion that always had you swooning. "We don't have to, if you don't want to. There's this other place I saw the other day, and it made me think of you--"

"I don't think we should go out at all," You say, and he stops, looking confused.

"Really? That's...that's not like you."

Your nails are digging into your palms when you say, "Yeah. Wouldn't want you to be recognized."

All emotions are wiped clean from his face, and he looks at you carefully. You can feel the weight of his gaze, though you are avoiding his eyes in the mirror.

"Recognized?" He echoes but his voice sounds strained now, knee bouncing slightly.

You don't reply. Don't look at him.

He deflates, shoulders curving inward as he presses his face into his hands. "How long?"

Your heart hammers against your ribs, the air in the room thick with tension. "Long enough," you snap.

"I didn't mean for it to happen like this," he murmurs, voice barely above a whisper. You can't help the sharp, humorless laugh you make as you turn from the sink to finally face him.

"Yeah? How did you mean for it to happen then?"

He looks up at you then, and you see the pain etched in his features, mingling with guilt. "I was going to tell you, I swear. I just…

“Didn’t” You finish. “You just didn’t.”

You swallow hard, the anger simmering beneath the surface threatening to boil over. "Just leave, Seungmin. I can't deal with this right now." You really don’t want to say the wrong thing, but your anger is so intense you know that if he stays here, you just might.

For a moment, he seems resigned, defeated even, as he nods silently and turns towards the door. But just as he reaches for the handle, he stops abruptly, his shoulders tensing. And then, in a swift motion, he spins back around, his expression fierce, determined.

"Fuck that," he hissed, voice laced with desperation as he strides back towards you. Before you can react, he cages you against the sink, his hands braced on either side of you, effectively trapping you.

"Listen to me," he demands, his eyes searching yours for any sign of understanding. "I know I messed up. I know I should have told you about who I really am, about what I do. But there's so much more to this story than you know."

You glare at him, your frustration palpable. "I don't want to hear your excuses, Seungmin. You lied to me, over and over again. How can I trust anything you say now?"

He flinches at your words, but doesn't back down. "Because I love you," he insists, his voice raw. "And I never wanted to hurt you. But I had to keep this part of my life hidden, to protect you, to protect us."

You scoff, incredulous. "Protect us? From what?"

His grip on the sink tightens, his jaw clenched in frustration. "From the fuck ups of my world," he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. "From the scrutiny, the pressure, the constant threat of exposure. I wanted to shield you from all of that–"

You shake your head, unable to comprehend his reasoning. "You should have let me decide for myself. You should have trusted me enough to handle the truth."

He hangs his head, defeated. "I know. And I'm sorry. I was selfish, and cowardly, and I hurt you in the process.” He sucks in a breath, bending his head down so that you are eye level. “I’m sorry. I’ll tell you everything. Will you listen?”

You purse your lips. Nod, despite the part of you that wants to remain angry. The larger part of you wants him to tell you. So he does.

He tells you about the pressure of living a double life, of the constant fear of being exposed, of the weight of expectations bearing down on him from all sides. He confesses his fear of losing you, of never being able to bridge the gap between his public persona and his private self.

As he speaks, you can feel the walls around your heart starting to crumble, the layers of hurt and betrayal slowly giving way to understanding. You see the raw honesty in his eyes, the sincerity in his voice, and you realize that despite everything, his love for you is real.

You stay in for your twenty-first birthday. In Seungmin’s arms, crying when he tells you how hard it’s been for him, then crying again when he tells you how Stray Kids had saved him from himself. You are a tangle of limbs, of open hearts and whispered confessions. A mess of giggles and groans when you find the edits of him Stay has made. Of soft kisses and softer hands. Of falling into a love in which there is no return.

—-

But all good things must come to an end. You just never thought you would be the one ending it.

You were twenty-two when your phone was stolen and your pictures and texts with Seungmin released to the press. Chan and the management at JYP tried their best to soothe the waters but they refused to be soothed. They raged and raged and raged. And you find that you do not know how to swim. 

The hate on you was hard to swallow, but expected. The people–and you refused to call them Stay because they weren’t–hated on your hair, your skin, your features, your voice, anything they could. They said that you were a whore that seduced their precious Seungmin. A gold digger. A slut. 

You deactivated all your socials, but although you couldn’t  see them anymore, you still heard them. They whispered to you and shook you from your sleep. Every step felt like wading through quicksand, every breath a struggle against suffocating despair. The barrage of hatred and vitriol from faceless strangers on the internet threatened to consume you whole.

Instead of distancing himself, Seungmin practically moved in with you during this time. Took off from promotions to reassure you, to hold you, to love you. He’d sing you to sleep with soft melodies, his voice a soothing balm to your shattered soul. He'd cook for you, clean for you, do anything and everything to ease the burden weighing heavy on your shoulders. It took a few months but you healed. Or you were healing. Until you found out about the hate against him. Found out from a call from Jeongin.

“If you love him, break up with him.”

The blood in your veins stilled. “What?”

You hear him shuffling through the phone line, hear the coldness of his tone. “Break up with Seungmin hyung. Your relationship is hurting him. It’s killing him. Didn’t you notice how he’s changed?” He scoffs. “Of course you didn’t. You're too busy wallowing in your own pity to realize that all you’ve ever done is tear apart everything he’s worked so hard to build.” 

His voice is steel. It is the steel of a freight train that is smacking into your chest, making it hard to breathe. You don’t respond. Can’t. On the other line, Jeongin takes a deep breath, his voice softening.

“Look, I know you’re not a bad person. If things were different, I think you’d be perfect for him. But things aren’t different. And if you love him, you want what’s best for him. Don’t you?”

Do you? Or are you so selfish that you can only think of yourself, and what you need?

You observe Seungmin from afar, through your screen, as he had been forced back on his schedules. There are black circles stretched under his eyes, a furrow etched between his brows where there hadn't been before. He smiles at the camera but it never reaches his eyes. He is always the last to arrive but the first to leave. You wonder how you never noticed before.

You remember the whispered confessions, the tender moments shared in the quiet intimacy of your shared space. You remember the warmth of his embrace, the gentleness of his touch, the way he had poured his heart out to you, laying bare his fears and insecurities. And yet, despite the love that binds you together, you can't shake the nagging doubt that lingers in the recesses of your mind.

You wonder if you're doing more harm than good by clinging to him, by refusing to let go. You wonder if your presence in his life is a source of strength or if it's dragging him further into the depths of despair. You wonder if love, no matter how pure and genuine, is enough to withstand the relentless onslaught of hatred and condemnation.

And as you watch him, as he struggles to navigate the treacherous waters of fame and notoriety, you realize that you can't bear to see him suffer any longer. You can't bear to be the cause of his pain, the reason for his torment. You can't bear to hold him back from the life he was destined to live, the dreams he was meant to chase.

So when he calls you one night, tells you, “I need to see you,” in that weary, desperate voice of his, you agree to see him.

—-

It's a crisp, clear night when you finally meet him, the stars twinkling overhead like distant beacons in the vast expanse of the sky. You find him standing on the street corner, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his coat, his breath misting in the chilly air. He looks different somehow, the weight of the world pressing down on his shoulders, the burden of his fame etched into the lines of his face. But despite the weariness that clings to him like a second skin, there's a flicker of relief in his eyes as he sees you approaching.

As soon as you are close enough, he reaches for your hand, tugging you closer so that he can rest his head on your shoulder, inhaling deeply.

“I’ve missed you,” he murmurs against your skin, hand releasing yours in favor of your waist, pulling you closer against him.

You stand there in the quiet embrace, the weight of his words sinking in as you wrap your arms around him, holding him close. There's a bittersweet ache in your chest as you realize that this might be the last time you'll hold him like this, the last time you'll feel the warmth of his body pressed against yours.

"I missed you too," you whisper, your voice barely above a breath as you bury your face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the familiar scent of his cologne mingled with the crisp night air.

He pulls back, concern etched into the way he frowns. This side of Seungmin is one that not everyone gets to see. But he doesn’t try to hide it from you. Never has. Instead, he cups your cheek, tilting your face upward so he can get a better look at you. “Are you tired? Sorry, I know it’s late but it was the only time I could get away. You look tired.”

You manage a weak smile. “I’m okay. Just…Just thinking.”

He studies you for a moment, his gaze searching yours for any hint of what's going on in your mind. "You seem distant," he observes softly, his thumb tracing circles on your cheek.

Your hand encircles his wrist, pulling him away from your face. You don’t deserve the comfort his touch brings. You don’t.

He catches your fingers. “You’re cold.”

“Seungmin.”

“You should’ve brought a jacket.” He’s unraveling the scarf around his neck. You notice the slight tremble in his fingers. “Why didn’t you bring a jacket? I always tell you–”

“Seungmin.”

“I always tell you to being a jacket but you never listen–”

“I’m breaking up with you.”

He flinches, and the scarf slips from his fingers, pooling at his feet. Takes a shaky breath and bends down to retrieve it. When he speaks, he gives no indication that he even heard what you said. 

“If you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll get sick, y/n.” He says, wrapping the scarf around your neck. He adjusts the scarf around your neck, his movements methodical, almost mechanical.

“Seungmin, please listen to me–”

“No,” He snaps, breathing harshly, his breath fogging up in the winter air. His knuckles are white as he ties the scarf firmly around your neck. “I won’t let you do this.”

You shake your head, pushing his hands away. “It’s already done.”

“Why?” His voice is strained. “I thought we were…I thought…” He lets loose a sound of frustration, unable to voice his thoughts. “Why are you doing this?”

Your heart strains against the ribs that cage them in, and your tongue feels like lead in your mouth and you can’t believe you are about to utter the lies you are thinking. But you do anyway.

“Because I can’t be with you anymore.” You choke out. “I can’t take it anymore, Min. Your fans are batshit crazy and–”

“And I can protect you,” He protests. “I can shield you away from all  that, I swear–”

“Well you’ve been doing a shit job at it,” The way he flinches makes you force down a sob. Force yourself to continue speaking. “It’s just not enough. This love…you are not enough for me.”

You unwrap the scarf from around your neck, thrusting it back into his hands, as he stands there, silent. ‘This is for the best, it’s for the best, I’m doing this for him–’

“But I love you,” 

You realize you’ve never heard his voice crack before. Not in the way it does now, when he speaks, and you somehow know there are tears in his eyes so you don’t look. You can’t bear to look.

“I love you, y/n, did you hear me? I need you.”

And suddenly you’re remembering that time you were ten years old and cradling your old dog’s head against your chest. He is looking up at you with eyes that plead to be saved, to be healed, but the vet says it’s time for you to let go now. “But Mama, he needs me,” You had cried, and your mother, with infinite patience, had pried your little hands away from the center of your world and said, “He needs you to let him go now.”

He needs you to let him go now. 

—---

Seungmin watches as you turn on your heel and walk away. Watches as he clutches the scarf in his hands and then somehow he’s back at the dorm and someone is asking him if he’s alright and there are needles pricking into his hands as he presses his nails into the palms of them

You’ll be back. You’ll come back to him.

His ears ring as he slams his way into his room and the questions follow him into the room, but Seungmin blocks it out with the pillow he shoves over her head. Everything is too much, and not even the pillow can’t muffle the cries in his head, the glass breaking in his heart. He grits his teeth, thinks about how he ruined everything. He ruined it. 

Why? Why was he so weak? Why was everything around him dull and boring and shattered? 

The blanket is too hot even in this winter cold when he pulls it over him, but he allows the suffocating feeling of it to ease the tension in his body. His eyes are damp, and he chokes on a sob in the pillow. 

You don't come. 

So, he remains in the room and picks up the pieces of his broken self, thinks about dancing with you, of your eyes. Thinks of a cafe, of black coffee that he never even liked but learned to after you got his order wrong.

His mind wanders through the fog of it, and Seungmin falls into the mattress, sinks into the worn springs of it, and doesn't move. Not for a long time. 

(You don't come.) 

#straykids #straykids fanfic #skz #straykids x reader #straykids x you #straykids x y/n #seungmin #kim seungmim #seungmin angst #seungmin fanfiction #seungmin fanfic #seungmin drabble #angst #sad

[godsmenusuperbowl]

8:39 PM ~ *Kim Seungmin*

Summary: Being a student is hard work. At least you have Seungmin to suffer right along with you.

Pairing: Kim Seungmin X G/N!Reader

Genre: Fluffy Drabble

Word Count: 318

Warning: Homework stress

Masterlist

Taglist: @foxwinter @maeleelee @mxnsxngie @kpop-will-kill-me

“How’s the studying going?”

Seungmin and you groaned in unison. Chris just laughed before setting a tupperware box down on Seungmin’s desk. He glanced at it.

“Did Felix make these brownies?”

“Yeah, he thought the two of you could use a snack break. Good luck. I do not envy either of you.”

Chris left with another laugh and you sighed. You laid back and rubbed your eyes while Seungmin opened the tupperware. You hated studying, but it had to be done. At least Seungmin was suffering with you.

“Want one?”

You looked up at the brownies Seungmin was offering you. You nodded. “Thanks.”

The two of you ate in silence before you spoke up. “Do you have any idea what you’re doing?”

Seungmin shook his head. “Mr Jeong’s lessons are always so hard!”

“Right?” You nodded before glancing back at your own homework. “I’m convinced trigonometry is some kind of mental torture device.”

“Yeah. At least Mrs. Son’s history work wasn’t so bad.” He admitted, swiping another brownie.

You nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. Also, I have some photography homework to complete as well. Can you help me with that?”

He nodded. “Sure. What do you need me to do?”

“I just need to do some simple portraits.” You explained. “I’m also going to ask the rest of Stray Kids to help out as well.”

“You’ll definitely have enough portraits then.” He snickered. “I know Changbin, Jisung, and Hyunjin will take up most of them. They might even ask to have some to keep if they’re done well enough.”

You nodded, smiling at the thought before it disappeared. “But first, math homework.”

Seungmin whined, “Don’t remind me.”

“It has to be done.”

“But we’re not done with the brownies yet!”

You should’ve protested, but he made an excellent point. “You’re right. We still have some left. Alright, brownies, math, and then pictures. Sounds like a plan?”

“Works for me.”

#Stray Kids #Stray Kids Fanfiction #Stray Kids Drabble #KPop #KPop Fanfiction #KPop Drabble #Stay #Kim Seungmin #Kim Seungmin X Reader #Kim Seungmin Fanfiction #Kim Seungmin Drabble #Kim Seungmin Fluff #Seungmin #Seungmin X Reader #Seungmin Fanfiction #Seungmin Drabble #Seungmin Fluff #School #School AU #Drabble #Fluff #Angst

[kwanisms]

➔ seungmin menu | back to character select | back to main menu

🔞 many of these works contain sexual content (18+ mdni) 🔞 ♤ — angst :: ♡ — fluff :: ♧ — smut ✍ — ongoing :: ⊝ — hiatus :: ⊗ — discontinued :: ✓ — completed

— oneshots

»» Kinkuary: cuckold + voyeurism (ft. Chris) ♧

➥ 4.6k; For Seungmin’s birthday, Chris decided to give him a gift he’s never considered giving to anyone else: a night with his own girlfriend, Y/N.

»» Creature Feature: Run Rabbit, Run ♧

➥ 20.5k; Seungmin is a vampire and has lived a very long life and seen many ages pass him by. He’s grown weary of immortality until he meets someone one random night who really puts things into perspective for him.

ⓘ DISCLAIMER :: MONSTER/ALIEN FUCKER ENTHUSIAST ⓘ ©️ kwanisms 2024 | all works on this blog are protected under copyright. Do not repost, continue, or translate my works. All graphics made by me. Content and support banners made by me using cafekitsune's template.

#stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids angst #stray kids fluff #stray kids smut #stray kids x reader #seungmin scenarios #seungmin imagines #seungmin fanfic #seungmin fanfiction #seungmin angst #seungmin fluff #seungmin smut #seungmin x reader #stray kids masterlist #kwanisms masterlist

[bunnypig18]

Teach Me Love - Skz/Atz Fanfiction

(AO3 Link)

Pairing: Jeong Yunho/Kim Seungmin Tags: Slow Burn, Romance, Mild Angst, First Kiss, Canon Compliant Word Count: 16k Summary:  Seungmin and Yunho are starring in a Drama together as the romantic leads. Seungmin has never been in love, but Yunho helps him with that dilemma. Seungmin learns a lot about himself along the way. A/N: My Stray Kids/Ateez Agenda continues. I've been working on this for a while and finally it's done!!!I actually didn't know anything about Imitation when I started writing this, but like halfway through I watched Imitation in its entirity and I actually reference one of the scenes in this fic. If you've watched Imitation, you'll know. If you didn't watch it, don't worry. Originally, I started writing this because I saw a pattern of idols acting in bl dramas. Like I watched the kdrama Semantic Error, which has two idols playing the romantic leads and it had my brain working overtime. Highly recommend this btw if someone is looking for a good BL show, it's absolutely fantastic. But I also watched Light on Me, which is ALSO a bl kdrama that has idols in main roles (more like main side characters, but still). I also know about Color Rush. I hope they make more bl dramas with Idols in main roles. Especially idols are still idols Anyway, enough rambling, I hope y'all enjoy!!! <3 Feedback is more than welcome :3c (This is for one of the monthly prompts in our server Clownracha Big kisses and hugs for @felixtok​ for beta reading :3) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Falling in love looked so easy in dramas. First came the eye contact and then the sparks would fly, like they were always meant to be. The universe would bring them together with coincidences that sometimes seemed so wild, Seungmin wondered how anyone could believe it. Falling in love looked too easy. Unrealistic.

Maybe Seungmin was just mad, because he never had fallen in love. Other people had told him a lot of it made sense. Even if the love came later, there was this feeling it was always there once you realize it, like fate had planned for this. They all spoke of it like the universe had a soulmate for everyone.

Seungmin didn't understand any of it. Love came as easy to him as human-talk to a dog. It was a mystery, a lie, something so far away he wondered if he could ever reach it. And he wanted to reach it. Seeing his friends find partners had him feel jealous, every kiss and glance and sweet word exchanged pulled at his heart. He wanted to know how it feels. Even if it was fake.

So when the opportunity came up to play the main lead in a romantic drama, he immediately said yes. It was the closest he would come to falling in love. Acting came with a certain level of immersion, after all.

Seungmin just didn't expect that a friend would join him on this journey.

"Hey! Long time no see!" Yunho smiled. That huge puppy smile that had Seungmin swallow heavily.

"Yeah. We've all been too busy lately."

Yunho sighed. "A tragedy, really. I always forget to ask for your number when we meet."

"My number?"

"Yeah. Well, everyone’s number. I only got Minho-hyung's."

Seungmin nodded, eyes drifting away, wandering over the table. They settled on the plastic cup Yunho was holding. His long fingers dwarfed the cup, making Seungmin wonder how big his hands were exactly. He stared down at his own. His own weren't small, but they seemed tiny in comparison.

"Are you okay, Minnie?"

Seungmin glanced up, blinking.

"Yeah."

"I know, it's kind of, well, weird." Yunho chuckled. "I also didn't expect to know my co-star."

Seungmin nodded again. "Why did you agree to this?"

"Curiosity. I acted in a drama last year, but only got to be the rejected love interest. It sounded nice to be the first choice."

"Ah."

Yunho tilted his head a little. He was unfairly handsome, Seungmin thought. Smooth facial structure sculpted by the gods, pretty lips that looked as soft as marshmallows, deep brown eyes that seemed to want to take Seungmin apart piece by piece. He was sweet candy. Seungmin understood why he was so popular.

Yunho leaned a little over the table and put his chin in his palm.

"And why did you agree to this?"

"To avoid the other members."

Yunho chuckled. A small smile played around Seungmin's lips.

"Constantly seeing them gets exhausting," Seungmin continued.

"I know what you mean." Yunho sighed dramatically. "I adore them, but especially San with his constant hugging makes me question my career choice."

"He can't be as bad as Chan hyung."

"No, trust me. I haven't slept in my bed alone for a whole week."

Seungmin's eyes widened. "You sleep in the same bed?"

Yunho nodded, smiling so sweetly. Too sweet. As if cuddling your friends to sleep was normal. It's what Chan and Changbin always said until the recent shoot of 2 Kids Room. Were Yunho and San like that too? Seungmin didn't even know if they were gay, but he did think San had a crush on Wooyoung.

Seungmin frowned. Why did he even care?

"Are you okay?" Yunho asked.

"Yeah."

"You know…" Yunho leaned in closer, reaching out a hand, but pulled back immediately. "If you don't want to do this together, I can give the role to someone else."

Seungmin opened his mouth to agree, but the words died on his tongue. It would have been easier to just say yes. Acting like he's in love with Yunho, it had to be a bad idea. Seungmin couldn't imagine that it wouldn't make their friendship weird. How actors stayed friends after this was a mystery. Just like so many other things.

"It's okay," Seungmin said.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. It will be fun!"

Maybe it made the acting easier if he was familiar with the other person. He was comfortable with Yunho. He liked Yunho. If it was true what other people said, then love wasn't so far away from what one felt for friends. The added bonus was that love made you want to kiss the other person, and Seungmin did sometimes wonder how it would feel to kiss Yunho. It was only ever Yunho that made him think that, and that had to be good enough to pretend Seungmin is in love with him.

Yunho smiled and raised his plastic cup.

"To great teamwork, then!"

Seungmin smiled back.

"I can't wait."

~~~~~~~~~~~

The first meeting was a crucial part of every romantic drama. That first spark had to come across, no matter how the relationship started. Friends, enemies, co-workers - anything was possible, as long as the beginning established the fire that would slowly grow across the story.

Seungmin remembered well the first time he met Yunho. It was only a month or so before Kingdom, when Wooyoung dragged him and Yeosang to the Stray Kids dorm to hang out with Changbin. Naturally, the group grew as some of the other SKZ members got curious about the movie they were watching.

Seungmin ignored them as much as he could. He didn't have the energy to meet new people, and he stayed in the bedroom. Of course, one could only stay in bed for so long before natural needs forced him to get up. That time, it was a dry throat and a cough that grew uncomfortable.

He peeked out of the room, evaluating the situation. Everyone seemed engrossed in the movie, and Seungmin tiptoed past them towards the kitchen. His eyes stayed fixed on the group on the couch, silent prayers running through his mind.

It was easy. Everything easy came with a price, and Seungmin had half a heart attack as he collided with a firm body, like running into a wall. He gasped and the rustling of someone moving on the couch reached his ear. Before he could even assess the situation, Seungmin grabbed the other man's arm and dragged him into the kitchen, slamming the door shut behind him.

One crisis was avoided, but that opened up a whole new one.

Seungmin let his shoulders slump and glanced at the closed door. Naturally, his eyes drifted to the figure right next to it. Like a magnet, they traveled higher and higher until he locked eyes with Yunho.

"Oh fuck."

Seungmin slapped a hand over his mouth and heat creeped into his cheeks. He had honestly thought it was Chan or Changbin that he had grabbed, but instead, there was this tall stranger with puppy eyes and a laugh that branded itself into Seungmin's mind.

"I'm sorry! I thought- I-"

Seungmin pressed his lips thin and bowed deep.

"You okay?" Yunho asked.

Slowly, Seungmin looked up again. Genuine concern softened the handsome face despite the amused smile.

"I…yes. I'm really sorry. I kinda…panicked."

"I could tell. Did you avoid us?"

Seungmin frowned and glanced at the door.

"I didn't want to talk to anyone…"

"Understandable. Especially with Wooyoung being one of the options."

A small chuckle escaped Seungmin, his heart just a little lighter. Yunho grinned and gestured towards himself.

"I'm Yunho by the way!"

"I know."

"Ah, right. Sorry. Sometimes I forget that people know me."

Seungmin huffed in amusement.

"Do you know me?"

Yunho raised an eyebrow, humming. He looked genuinely thoughtful, and only the twitch in the corners of his mouth exposed his real intentions.

"Let me guess. Braces-"

Seungmin resisted the urge to cover his mouth again.

"-cute-"

The heat grew stronger in Seungmin's cheeks.

"-and seems to be a bit of a brat. I guess you're Seungmin."

"How could you possibly know I'm a brat?"

"Trust me, spending years with Wooyoung will give you a sixth sense for that."

Seungmin laughed. He laughed a lot that day, because Yunho ended up following him to the bedroom, and they sat together on Seungmin's bed until Wooyoung and Yeosang decided they wanted to go home.

Seungmin missed the warm body next to him the moment Yunho stood up. He said goodbye with a bright smile, a smile that had stayed in Seungmin's mind even as he fell asleep.

It was one of the few times Seungmin clicked with someone instantly. He was sure they would become good friends, but with their busy schedules and inability to exchange numbers, it all died down a little. During Kingdom, they took every and any opportunity to spend time together. It was barely anything. Never enough. Seungmin missed his smile every time they had to part.

Maybe it was an act of fate that they ended up in this acting project together. No matter how much it might destroy their friendship, Seungmin would treasure the time they had together.

Except, the first day was already driving Seungmin insane. He had read the script over and over again in preparation, and he still found himself lost. Especially when they were told to prepare for the scene where their characters first meet.

It was important. Essential. It had to hit. But Seungmin stared at the script. He was worried.

A cold can was pressed against his forehead and he shuddered, clutching the script tighter. It crumbled at the edges under his fingers, and Yunho clicked his tongue.

"Careful. The poor paper."

Seungmin glared up at him.

"Don't scare me then!"

Yunho laughed. The sound radiated through Seungmin's senses right into his chest, warming his heart like no one else ever did.

"Sorry, Minnie. I got you a drink."

Seungmin put the script aside and accepted the offered drink. The cool surface soothed some of the heat crawling under his skin, but it could only do so much when the source of the warmth sat down next to him on the bench.

"That's my favorite," Seungmin said, holding up the can.

The melting water dripped all over his thigh, and Seungmin whipped it down with the edge of his shirt, exposing some of his stomach in the process. Yunho watched.

"I know."

"How?"

Seungmin dropped his shirt and cracked the can open. It hissed, releasing the sweet scent of watermelon, but it barely stood a chance against Yunho's cologne.

Yunho glanced back up and smiled.

"Minho hyung told me."

"Oh. How does he know?"

Yunho chuckled. "Maybe he's just interested in your life."

"If you get him to admit that, I will take you out for dinner."

"Can I get a dinner regardless?"

"Only if you pay."

"Deal!"

Seungmin huffed and took a big sip from his drink. His eyes didn't leave Yunho though, fixated on his big hand running through his hair and playing with his ear. A hint of red painted Yunho's cheekbones, and his pupils darted all over the place. They settled on Seungmin. Yunho turned his head towards him as well, resting his chin on his palm.

"Are you excited for our first scene together?"

"Yes…"

"But?"

Seungmin raised an eyebrow.

Yunho smiled. "Just sounds like you're unsure."

"I…" Pursing his lips, Seungmin glanced at the script. "I have to pretend to fall into your arms, but it sounds a bit scary."

"Do you not trust me to catch you?"

"It's not that…"

Yunho hummed. He looked around again, as if searching for something, but it was just them in the small room. His eyes came back to Seungmin. He pushed himself to his feet, putting his drink aside and then doing the same with Seungmin's, leaving nothing but water droplets running down his palm.

A frown pulled at Seungmin's face.

"What are you doing?"

Yunho grinned. "Let's try a trust fall."

"A trust fall."

"Yeah! It will help."

"I do trust that you can catch me."

"Then what's the problem?"

Seungmin dropped his gaze. Actually, what was the problem? Maybe he didn't trust Yunho after all. He had only done it once with the other members, which had been terrifying. Difficult.

Sighing, he looked back up at Yunho.

"Okay, let's do it."

Slowly, he pushed himself off the bench, wiping his hands on his pants. Yunho held out his arms with a patient smile. Seungmin looked them up and down, hesitating, but ultimately, he turned around. Fingertips brushed against his back like trying to reassure him, but it only had Seungmin's heart beat faster.

It felt silly. Like Yunho was going to make fun of him any second, but nothing. Silence. That was somehow even worse, because Seungmin couldn't be sure Yunho still stood behind him. There was only this radiating heat of another body, and that was easily imagined. Seungmin didn't think Yunho would leave him hanging, or falling, in that case, but Seungmin still found himself unsure.

He wondered why. He trusted Yunho, he was sure Yunho would catch him, but perhaps that was the problem.

Yunho.

Getting so close to him. Something about his presence always had Seungmin feel weird - warm, overwhelmed, lost. He didn't know why. It confused him, but no matter how much he thought about it, he couldn't say why his heart ran a race every time Yunho got close.

Damn that feeling. If he didn't get over himself, this whole thing would fail, and he really wanted to act in this drama. Especially with Yunho.

Seungmin breathed in deeply. With the exhale, he began to lean back. The floor slipped away underneath him. Seungmin squeezed his eyes shut, his heart sinking into his stomach. Two strong arms wrapped around his body before he could even comprehend the fall.

A soft gasp slipped his tongue. Seungmin scrambled so that one foot found steady ground, but he didn't dare to move much else. Not with the firm chest pressed against the back of his head and the big hands splayed over his torso. Both things he became aware of too quickly as he calmed.

Seungmin stared down at the arms, blinking once, twice. Veins snaked underneath the skin as he traced them to Yunho's biceps. The muscles flexed with the effort to keep Seungmin up, but was it that much of an effort? His hold was stable, easy. He didn't even try to get Seungmin back on his feet.

Seungmin dropped his head back and met Yunho's eyes. A smile adorned his lips, laced with something Seungmin had never seen on his expression before. It stretched all over his face and sparked dark in his blown pupils, but Seungmin had no idea what it meant.

"Are you okay?" Yunho asked, his voice so low and close, it chased a shiver down Seungmin's spine.

"Yeah…" He swallowed. "Are you?"

Yunho leaned down, drawing closer. Seungmin instinctively ducked, but he only found himself pressing further into the broad body holding him up. Amusement sparked across Yunho's expression, overwhelming what Seungmin had noticed before.

"I am. You're really light, you know?"

Heat crawled into Seungmin's cheeks as he shook his head.

"No? But you are," Yunho continued.

"Maybe you're just strong."

Yunho chuckled. The sound seemed to rumble through his whole body, shaking Seungmin as well.

"I'm serious, hyung!"

"Okay, okay. If you say so."

Grinning, Yunho tightened his grip and gently tugged. Seungmin followed the pressure until he found a steady stance. The arms loosened around him, but remained in place, a warm weight right under his chest. Like this, Seungmin had no choice but to press closer against Yunho. Heat seeped into his back where it touched Yunho's broad chest.

Everything was hot. Too hot. Seungmin swallowed, but his throat was tight, every word he could have said struggling to crawl out. Sweat gathered in his neck and along his forehead. Yunho's cologne fluttered around Seungmin, too heavy to ignore. It made his head spin and breathing even harder.

"Seungminnie…"

Seungmin’s chest tightened, heart fluttering high, high above the clouds.

"Yes?"

"You smell really nice."

Seungmin sucked in a sharp breath. His cheeks burned, and he dropped his head further, focusing on the floor, but with Yunho's arms in his field of vision, he could only ignore the other man so much.

"T-thanks, hyung."

"Like flowers. Sweet." Yunho leaned down and buried his nose in Seungmin's hair. "It's your shampoo, right?"

Seungmin swore his heart swelled in size. He could taste it in his throat, this feeling he could never quite place.

"Yeah. It's Felix's. I really like it."

Yunho hummed. "I figured. It suits you, though. You're sweet too."

It took every bit of willpower for Seungmin not to bury his face in his hands. He should have gotten an award for this kind of strength. Especially when Yunho dipped his head lower and his breath ghosted along the shell of Seungmin's ear.

"If you were a candy, I would eat you every day," Yunho whispered.

A weird noise choked out between Seungmin's lips. A whine? Something like that. Definitely something jarring that had Seungmin snap out of his trance.

He pulled Yunho's arms off and turned on his heel. His shoe got stuck on the floor. An instant moment felt like several as gravity got the better of him. It dragged him backwards. Long fingers curled around his wrist and an arm snaked around his waist.

Seungmin blinked through the shock and looked up, finding Yunho's wide eyes. Concern pulled at his expression, mixed with surprise. Most importantly, though, his face was too close.

Seungmin's heart skipped a few beats. His whole face seemed to be on fire, the heat crawling down his neck and into his ears. He opened his mouth and closed it again. Yunho just stared, pupils darting all over Seungmin's face and down his body.

"Are you okay?"

"I…I think so."

Yunho sighed in relief and found Seungmin's gaze again. A small smile curled his lips, so handsome, Seungmin's heart did a whole backflip.

"You know…"

Yunho gently pushed Seungmin back on his feet. Those long fingers loosened their grip on his wrist until they untangled entirely, and only a warm palm pressed against the small Seungmin's back.

"If you wanted to try out another trust fall, you could have just told me."

"It's not- I didn't mean-"

Seungmin groaned, throwing his hands over his face, and Yunho laughed. That same stupidly addictive laugh that warmed Seungmin's chest and had him smile as well.

"I didn't mean to…"

Yunho patted his back, grinning from ear to ear.

"I know, I know. It was good training, though."

Seungmin huffed with mild amusement. "I guess."

"If we do it like this in front of the camera, it will be perfect."

"I'm not going to be able to fall like that on command."

Another pat on the back. Seungmin glared, but Yunho only leaned in closer, smirking.

"We'll figure this out together."

"Okay."

And they did eventually figure it out. It only took two takes for the scene to work as expected, the first only ruined by Seungmin forgetting his line. Who could blame him when Yunho smiled at him like Seungmin held the stars in his hands? No matter how much of it he knew was acting, his heart fluttered nonetheless during both takes, but at least the second time he remembered how to actually talk. He still fumbled through his lines, but everyone seemed satisfied with his performance.

Was that how people in love acted? Seungmin watched a lot of dramas and being nervous was something people always seem to expect from someone in love. Stuttering while talking, being clumsy, sweaty hands and an overwhelmed mind. It was exactly how Seungmin felt around Yunho. He supposed it was useful for acting, that he could draw a similar experience from somewhere.

The question was just why did Yunho make him feel this way?

~~~~~~~~~~~

Yunho was amazing. There was no other way to put this. If Seungmin tried to break it down, he would have spent a whole day listing every positive adjective that came to his mind. From his handsome face and pretty smile to how easily he got people - especially Seungmin - to laugh. Not even including Yunho’s kindness and understanding. It was a lot. Trying to think of a single flaw seemed impossible.

Watching him act only added to the list. Yunho just looked cool, always so focused, striving for perfection. And he was perfect. Seungmin found himself lost in anything that was Yunho more than once. Not that it was anything new, but now it made Seungmin forget lines and cues. The fact that nobody had taken him aside yet to give him a firm telling off was a miracle, really. He would have done it in their shoes.

But it wasn't his fault his mind went blank every time Yunho smiled at him. Those smiles that were all an act, sweet and dripping with love, eyes sparkling like Seungmin was special, they would have done something to everyone.

Seungmin sighed, sinking deeper into his chair. Another scene with Yunho was awaiting him and maybe if he fucked up this time, they would give him a lecture, because really there wasn't anything he should be able to fuck up. He was supposed to pretend to be asleep. Easy. Just lay there and not move. Anyone could do that. It was what Yunho was supposed to do that had Seungmin worried.

Another sigh slipped through his lips as he threw back his head, eyes squeezed shut. It was stupid. All of it. Like, Yunho had put a spell on him that made him a worse actor. Just his sheer presence had Seungmin's focus slip away and words fumble. The fact that they only had scenes where they talked or stared at each other yearningly - except for that first scene - was the only reason Seungmin hadn't lost his mind yet.

But now Yunho was supposed to touch his face, and they expected Seungmin to stay still?

He wanted to cry.

"Drink?"

Seungmin looked up, right into Yunho's deep eyes. He didn't even register the can in his hand until it pressed against his cheek. He shuddered and ducked away from the cold aluminum, causing Yunho to laugh.

"Sorry. I need to start warning you."

Seungmin huffed. "Or you stop shoving cold things into my face."

"I can shove warm things into your face instead."

"Like what?"

Yunho held up the can, raising an eyebrow. "Like this if you don't drink it now."

"What if I don't want to?"

"And you tried to deny that you're a brat."

Seungmin laughed. Some of the tension loosened with it, and he took a deep breath. He accepted the can, wiping the excessive water from the condensation on his pants. The sweet watermelon melted on his tongue and soothed even more of the tension, enough that he felt like he could actually think rationally.

That was until he glanced over at Yunho, who emptied his water bottle almost in one go. A soft flush dusted his cheeks as he gasped for air. A drop of water spilled from the corner of his mouth and trailed down his chin and neck, where Yunho wiped it off. He pursed his lips, mumbling something. Seungmin could only stare.

"Right, Minnie?"

"W-what?"

Yunho chuckled. "It's hot today, isn't it?"

"Ah. Right. Yeah, but it could be worse."

"That's true, but I would rather bathe in ice water than sit here."

Without much thought, Seungmin reached out and pressed his cold can against Yunho's forehead. He sighed deeply and leaned in closer. For a moment, he closed his eyes while Seungmin rolled the can along his skin. Only when all the cold seemed to be gone, did Yunho meet his eyes.

Seungmin stilled. The corners of Yunho's eyes crinkled with the smile forming on his lips.

"Thanks."

Seungmin quickly pulled back and nodded, gaze dropping to the can. It had warmed up quite a bit from Yunho's skin. Drinking from it suddenly felt weird, and Seungmin put it aside, right next to his forgotten script. He frowned.

"Hyung…"

Sitting back, Seungmin met Yunho's eyes again.

"Do you…We have to film the scene next where you…your character finds mine asleep, right?"

"Yeah."

"Ah."

Yunho raised an eyebrow and leaned in even closer. His pupils seemed to dart all over Seungmin's face, peeling away every layer until they found what they were looking for.

"Are you nervous?"

"No…"

"It's okay if you are," Yunho said, tilting his head. "I know you're not big on skinship."

"Did Minho hyung tell you that too?"

Chuckling, Yunho nodded.

"It feels like you two are constantly talking about me."

"If it makes you uncomfortable, we can stop-" "No!"

Yunho's eyes widened. Something sparked in them, something that Seungmin couldn't catch fast enough.

He cleared his throat.

"It's okay. I just don't get why."

Yunho slowly nodded. "Why not? I'm curious about you."

"Curious? About me?"

"Yes. We're working together after all."

"Right…"

Of course, it was about that. Seungmin didn't know what else he expected, but he couldn't lie about the disappointment sinking in his chest. He looked down on his script.

"Maybe I am a little nervous," Seungmin said.

"That's understandable."

"Hyung-"

Their eyes met. A warm shiver chased down Seungmin's back. He almost forgot what he wanted to say.

"-can we try it out first? Like with the trust fall."

Yunho blinked. "You mean…you want me to touch your face?"

"Yes. If that's okay."

"Of course!"

Seungmin twitched at the volume of Yunho's voice, eyes growing wide. Yunho bowed his head and cleared his throat.

"Of course. Yeah. We can do it. Just…" He looked back up, shuffling closer with his chair. "Just tell me if you want to stop."

Seungmin nodded. Gripping the armrest, he leaned in closer. Yunho did the same and lifted his hands. Seungmin followed them from the corner of his eyes, throat tight with the breath he was holding. They drew closer and closer, every second stretching like minutes.

Heat settled on Seungmin's cheeks, tingling where he expected Yunho to touch, and his fingers gripped tighter around the armrest. A brush of skin against skin had him weak in the knees and even sitting, he felt like he was losing balance.

And then finally, fingertips pressed against Seungmin's skin. They traced along his jaw all the way up to his ear. Seungmin didn't dare to move, willing away the shiver threatening to crawl up his back. Every breath strained his chest, and it was almost frustrating how calm Yunho looked. The only hint of embarrassment was his inability to hold eye contact, pupils shaking to focus on anything else about Seungmin's face.

"Your skin is so soft," Yunho whispered.

His other hand found its place as well, and he properly cupped Seungmin's cheeks in his palms. Gentle. So gentle. Like handling fragile glass. Only the slightest bit of pressure danced where his fingertips warmed Seungmin's skin.

Their eyes met and both inhaled deeply.

"Soft?"

Yunho nodded. "It fits how cute you are, though."

"C-cute?"

"So cute."

The sweetest smile curled Yunho's lips. Much too similar to how he would look at Seungmin while on camera. Books were right when they described someone’s eyes as sparkling, like stars filled the space around Yunho's dilated pupils. Seungmin understood why people liked to watch the night sky.

They both leaned in closer. Yunho's thumbs rubbed gently along Seungmin's cheekbones, fueling the heat stretching everywhere he touched. Their breaths mingled as the space between them grew smaller. Seungmin tasted his heart in his throat.

Someone called their names. They both jumped in their seats, pulling away almost simultaneously. Seungmin dropped his head back. The ceiling suddenly seemed like the most interesting thing in the universe. A deep sigh echoed beside him, but Seungmin chose to ignore it, while in the back of his mind he wondered what it meant.

Annoyance? Disappointment? But for what?

Seungmin shook those thoughts off, just as the door opened and one of the staff members peeked inside.

"Break is over."

"Okay, we'll be right there," Yunho said, the small smile so forced, even Seungmin could tell.

He froze as Yunho turned his head back to him. Something sparked across his expression, something akin to curiosity, but it melted away with another smile, this one much more real. Seungmin melted with it.

"Are you ready?" Yunho asked.

No. The answer was a definite no. Not with sweat dripping in his neck and his heart threatening to jump out of his chest.

"Yes."

"Good. Let's go then."

Seungmin nodded, but it still took him a moment to actually get up. His legs felt like jelly and every muscle protested against moving, like it begged for him to stay there, as if Yunho would come back and touch him again.

It was just nice. Seungmin couldn't think of any other reason why he would want it to happen again. He wasn't big on skinship, but something about the gentle pressure of Yunho's big hands, the warmth, the look on his face, Seungmin shuddered at the mere thought of it all.

He couldn't forget about it, even as the camera turned on. It was a blessing Seungmin only had to lay there, pretending to sleep, because he might have just passed out when Yunho's fingertips caressed his cheek again. His heart skipped a beat as they trailed his bottom lip and his legs twitched under the table, a motion thankfully hidden from the cameras. And from Yunho. Seungmin didn't want to explain why he reacted so strongly to such a simple touch, because really, he had no idea himself.

Yunho was yet another mystery to be solved.

~~~~~~~~~~

Denial was a man's greatest strength and weakness all at the same time. Everyone did it, consciously or not. A tool that could help, but also ruin. In Seungmin's case, it did the latter.

He had stopped counting the times he had read the script. Enough to know every line like the back of his hand, not just his own. Seungmin knew this scene would happen. It was so easy to say "It's still a bit till we get there, I'll be ready when it happens". Denial 101.

In truth, Seungmin wasn't ready.

"You and this boy, is it true?" his 'father' asked.

Seungmin stiffened. It wasn't even acted. He looked up, his mind going too fast, but he caught the line he was supposed to say just in time.

"What boy?"

"You know who. The one that brought you home the other day."

"Ah…I…He's just a friend."

Inhale. Exhale. Seungmin tightened his hand around the glass of water as he lifted it to his lips. The cameras burned on his skin, the water stale, disgusting.

Somewhere among the crew was Yunho and Seungmin wished he could look around to find him, but his eyes stayed fixed on the actor right in front of him.

"A friend," the man said, the tone so perfect.

Too perfect. Too real. Cold. Judging.

Seungmin pressed his lips together, just subtle enough that no one noticed.

"A friend," Seungmin repeated.

He flinched as the other man slammed his hand on the table, glasses and cutlery shaking with the impact. A sick sensation crawled up Seungmin's throat. He swallowed against it, blinking away the building burn in his eyes.

"So you and him," His 'father' cleared his throat, "you're not a couple?"

"What? No! No. It's all rumors."

"It better be. It's bad enough he's your friend, but a couple?" The man shook his head. "You know how bad that would be?"

"Why?"

"Excuse me?"

Seungmin inhaled deeply and looked up again. His chest strained, his throat tight, protesting against every word. That was not what he was meant to say, was it? He couldn't tell. The script, his lines, he couldn't find it in the whirling mess of thoughts.

"Why is he so bad?"

"He's gay. I don't want you to be around such people."

The ill feeling spread further inside Seungmin, nesting itself in his mind and around his heart and deep in his stomach.

He swallowed and jumped to his feet.

"I'm gay too."

"What?"

"I said-"

"No, I heard you, but you better be joking," the other man said, every word dripping with venom.

Seungmin met his eyes.

It wasn't real.

It was fine.

He was fine.

He was safe.

"I'm not joking."

The other man jumped up as well and his chair tumbled to the floor. Seungmin flinched, heart racing, mind spinning. He stared down at the table through a blur, and every breath struggled past his throat.

"My son is not gay!"

"He is."

"No! No, absolutely not."

"But I am! I- Why is it so bad?"

"You're not my son."

Seungmin shuddered at the calmness of his 'father's' voice. No, not exactly calm, but indifferent. That was even worse than being yelled at. It had been the worst thing about his real father's reaction too.

"You can't do that…"

"But I can. Now leave."

The man pointed towards the front door, just past the camera crew. Seungmin followed the finger and his heart skipped a beat as his eyes met another familiar pair. Yunho frowned deeply, arms crossed, eyes darting back and forth between Seungmin and the camera crew.

Slowly, Seungmin turned back to the older man in front of him, Yunho's gaze like a spell holding him captive.

"I'm your son! You can't kick me out!"

Another slam on the table echoed in the room. Seungmin's eyes widened, tears burning along the edge. What even was scripted anymore? It all seemed like a surreal parody of that conversation months ago.

"Get out!"

"But-"

"Out! Now!"

Seungmin jerked away from the other man's hand that tried to grab him. It wasn't supposed to go like this. His 'father' was going to drag him to the door by the sleeve, but Seungmin couldn't help it.

No one called for them to stop. His co actor stared in surprise and Seungmin opened his mouth to apologize, but his voice broke into a sob instead. He turned on his heel as the first tears spilled down his cheeks. The world twisted before him and he stumbled, but didn't fall, reaching the door just as people finally called out to him.

He wasn't supposed to actually leave the room, but he couldn't breathe. He needed air. He needed to leave.

Cool air greeted him as the second door swung open. Seungmin gasped, eyes squeezed shut. He shuddered with the crawling cold, a harsh contrast against the fire stretching under his skin.

It was welcomed.

Seungmin melted into the soothing touch, letting the wind play with his air and dry the tears spilling and spilling and-

"Seungmin!"

The door flew open again. Seungmin twitched and would have run away again if not for the long fingers curling around his wrist. He stilled, eyes still closed, but the storm in his mind fell silent as another body drew closer. Seungmin instinctively leaned into the new source of warmth, so different from the uncomfortable burn.

"Seungmin. Hey-"

The fingers slipped away, only for a heavy palm to find its place on Seungmin's back.

"-are you okay?"

Seungmin shook his head, blinking through the blur. More tears trailed his skin and a finger, that wasn't his, brushed them away. As the world slowly came back into focus, Seungmin found eyes that reminded him of the night sky.

Concern twisted Yunho’s whole expression, and Seungmin cried more and more until everything washed away again.

Two strong arms enveloped him and tugged him closer. Seungmin buried his face in Yunho's neck, his fingers twisting into the thin fabric of Yunho's shirt.

Sob after sob shook through his body. His voice cracked after some time, but he still cried. An uncomfortable ache bloomed in his forehead, and Seungmin wished he could just stop. He clung to Yunho like his life depended on it and really, it might as well have been true, because the big hand rubbing up and down his back was the only thing keeping his heart from breaking completely.

But a person could only cry so much at once. Eventually the tears stopped and his body calmed, more or less, enough that Seungmin could actually think. He separated himself from Yunho, but only enough that he could look him in the eyes and also remain in the embrace.

"I'm sorry…"

Yunho smiled. "Why are you sorry?"

"I just… I ruined the scene and ran away…"

"You didn't ruin anything. Come here-" Yunho dropped his arms and gestured over to a staircase close by. "-let's sit down."

As disappointed as Seungmin was about the loss of contact, he found it again when Yunho shuffled as close as possible on the stairs. Seungmin wiped away the remains of his tears and met Yunho's gaze, but a sudden embarrassment crawled in his chest and he dropped his head. Yunho gently bumped their shoulders together. Seungmin couldn't help but smile.

"I'm still sorry," he whispered.

"Don't be. Everyone could see that the scene really got to you. It happens, trust me. I've seen other actors genuinely cry during certain scenes."

Seungmin dared a side glance, finding Yunho smiling.

"Really?"

Yunho nodded. "Don't worry, no one will blame you. And if they do-"

Yunho pursed his lips and leaned in closer.

"-I'll have a word with them."

Seungmin laughed. Open and genuinely, his whole body shaking. It wasn't even that funny, but Seungmin couldn't help it. His heart fluttered so light and easy, a warm tingle spread over his skin, originating where their shoulders touched.

Taking a deep breath, Seungmin looked back at Yunho. A smile softened Yunho's face, that same sweet smile he always wore when looking at Seungmin, simple and warm. His gaze was fixed on Seungmin like he was the only thing that mattered. It was so easy to fall into his puppy eyes, so easy to forget why they were sitting here in the first place.

"Thank you, hyung," Seungmin whispered, fingers fidgeting on top of his bent knees.

"I didn't really do anything."

"You did plenty."

Yunho huffed softly. "I can do a lot more. If you want to."

"And what is that?"

"Listen. I can listen. Not to ruin the moment, but there has to be a reason that scene got you so emotional."

Seungmin dropped his head, pulling his eyebrows together. He pressed his lips into a thin line, then let his mouth fall open, a small sigh following close.

A strong arm snaked along his back and settled around his waist, tugging him closer against the firm body.

"You don't have to talk about it," Yunho continued.

"I know."

"But it might make you feel better."

Releasing a shaky breath, Seungmin dropped his head on Yunho's shoulder. Broad, hard, not exactly comfortable, but Seungmin could have stayed there forever.

"I didn't even tell the other members. Not even Channie hyung…"

Yunho nodded to show he was listening.

"I'm gay."

"Oh."

Did Yunho just sound relieved?

Seungmin glanced up, but just like his voice, his expression was unreadable. Concentrated, maybe, but no matter how many times Seungmin traced every line in Yunho's face, he couldn't find anything beyond the furrowed brows and eyes fixed on somewhere in front of them.

"When I found out I got this role," Seungmin continued and Yunho blinked a few times,

"I knew I had to come out to my parents. They would ask questions the moment they see me in a drama like this."

"Right."

"So I told them."

Seungmin cringed at the crack in his voice. He swallowed deeply, grateful for the small encouraging smile Yunho gave him.

"Honestly, I expected them to be supportive. But my mom just stayed silent while my father-"

Another crack, stronger than the first. Seungmin pulled his legs tighter against them and snuggled deeper into Yunho's side. The arm around his waist tightened as a thumb drew gentle circles through the thin shirt.

"My father said I need to reject the role. I disagreed, then he got mad, told me to leave and not come back if this is how I choose to live."

With how much Seungmin had cried before, there was nothing left except a burn stretching over his entire face. His heart still hurt, straining with every word, cracking and shaking. Only Yunho's warmth seemed to hold it together.

"Seungmin, I'm so sorry that happened…"

"I thought I was over it. I thought it was fine."

"You should really talk to Chan hyung about this."

Seungmin nodded.

"You need someone who is there for you," Yunho continued.

"I got you now, hyung."

Yunho huffed, squeezing Seungmin's waist.

"You do. I will always listen. I'm gay too, so I know it's not easy, but…"

Yunho turned his head away, Seungmin glanced up again.

"I know Bang Chan is gay too and he's…” Yunho took a deep breath, “he's special to you, so I imagine it might be even better to have his support."

"You're special to me too, hyung."

A visible shudder shook through Yunho's body, shaking Seungmin as well with how close they were. Seungmin looked down at the thin shirt covering Yunho and guilt nagged at the back of his mind for making Yunho sit in the cold.

Yunho breathed in deeply and found Seungmin's eyes again.

"When did you figure out you're gay?"

"Oh, good question…I guess when I became a trainee? It was my first time sharing a room with other boys."

A soft chuckle spilled from Yunho's lips. "Ah yes, that can awaken a lot of things in you. Especially because some guys don't know what decency is."

"Oh yeah. One trainee never even put on underwear after taking a shower. Said that letting the air dry his body is more healthy than using a towel."

Another chuckle. Seungmin joined in this time.

"It was similar for me. Developed a crush on another trainee, the usual. Did you have a crush on another trainee?" Yunho asked.

"No. I actually never had a crush on anyone."

Yunho froze. Alarmingly so, stiff from head to toe. Seungmin put a hand over the one on his waist and looked up, finding Yunho's expression…blank. A little pale.

"Are you okay, hyung?"

Yunho blinked once, twice, and slowly turned back to Seungmin. He swallowed, jaw tense. A small smile curled his lips and he nodded.

"I'm okay. So…" He cocked his head, eyes wandering somewhere behind Seungmin. "You've never been in love."

"As far as I know."

"As…far as you know?"

"Yeah. Honestly, I have no idea."

"Why? How?"

Seungmin hummed, slowly lifting his head off Yunho's shoulder. The arm around his waist squeezed, like it wanted to tug him close again, but slipped away instead. A cold shiver chased down Seungmin's spine at the loss of contact and for a moment, he wondered if he should ask for it.

"I don't understand what it's supposed to feel like to be in love. Maybe I have felt it before, but I have no idea."

"Wow…"

"It's weird, isn't it?"

"What? No!" Yunho threw his hands over Seungmin's shoulders, eyes growing wide. "That's not- You're good. You're not weird."

"I am. It's okay."

Yunho shook his head, a bit more aggressive than necessary.

"It's not. It's not weird. I'm just surprised."

The big hands slipped away and Seungmin put his hand over the warm spots.

"Are you in love? I mean, right now?"

Yunho pursed his lips, eyes drifting away. He opened his mouth and his frown deepened. Whatever Yunho wanted to say, he swallowed it down, dropping his head with a sigh.

"I am."

"With who?" Seungmin asked.

Yunho met his gaze and smiled. It wasn't as bright as before. Like he was holding back, but Seungmin didn't dare to ask.

"It's a secret."

"Is it San?"

"San?" Yunho laughed softly. "Why do you think that?"

"I saw the live with Seonghwa hyung where you said you often cuddle to sleep."

"Ah." Yunho nodded, smile curling into a smirk. "It's not like that. I mean, yes, San sometimes hugs me to sleep, but it's just a friend thing."

"Changbin hyung and Channie hyung said that too, and then they got into a relationship."

Yunho laughed again.

"It's not San, trust me."

"Okay, but you won't tell me who."

"Nope."

Seungmin huffed, burying his chin in his hands. While he was staring ahead on the street, he could see Yunho looking at him from the side. A pleasant heat bloomed in Seungmin's cheeks under the attention, causing him to cover more of his face.

"Can you at least tell me what it feels like to be in love?"

"That's not that easy," Yunho said, sounding almost defeated.

"I know. Just….say what comes to your mind. Try." Seungmin turned his head, lips curled into a pout. "Please?"

Yunho's eyes widened and for just a moment, something sparked across his face that caught Seungmin's attention. Unfortunately, it was too fast to grasp. Too unfamiliar to understand.

Yunho huffed, smiling much brighter.

"I can't deny you anything. Okay, so-"

Seungmin shuffled closer, melting against Yunho's body heat. He rarely felt this kind of comfort.

"-when you love someone, you think about them all the time. I guess. They're always on your mind, everything reminds you of them. Your friends are sick and tired because you constantly talk about them. You see a cute dog plushie and think it looks like them. You see their favorite snack and want to buy the whole stock to give it to them. Consciously or not, they're always there."

"I see…"

Seungmin furrowed his brows, the words settling in his mind. Always there. Has he ever had someone that he couldn't stop thinking about? The only person that came to his mind was Yunho, but of course he would think about him a lot. They worked on a drama together. But even before that, Yunho had filled his head.

"What else?" Seungmin asked.

"You want more?"

Seungmin nodded, glancing at Yunho. Mild amusement softened his face. His handsome face. Unfairly handsome. Seungmin could have stared at it for hours, wishing he was that good-looking.

"When you're around them, all your focus is on them." Yunho leaned in closer, gaze firmly set on Seungmin. "They do something endearing, and it's like no one else exists. You want to kiss them, hold their hand, just anything to be close to them."

"Are you thinking about your crush right now?"

"Yes."

"And what are you thinking about?"

"How it hurts to see them cry."

Seungmin tilted his head, smile growing wide enough to flash his braces. For just a moment, Yunho's eyes flicked down, and he visibly swallowed, mouth falling open. Seungmin breached just a little more of the space between them and Yunho met his gaze again.

"You don't have to worry about that. You're very good at comforting people."

"Am I?"

"Yep. Whoever you have a crush on, they can count themselves lucky. You're amazing."

Yunho chuckled, soft and restrained. "Thank you."

"I mean it! You're really nice, funny, attractive, thoughtful-"

"Okay, okay, that's enough!"

They both laughed. Seungmin didn't miss the red tint along Yunho's ears. A look Seungmin rarely saw. He always seemed to be the one getting embarrassed. It was nice to see Yunho scratching at his neck, eyes darting all over the place.

He was cute.

"I mean it, though, hyung."

"I know. Thank you, really."

Seungmin smiled. Whoever it was who Yunho was in love with, Seungmin hoped that they appreciated him. He deserved nothing less than pure love. Seungmin ignored the strain in his chest at the thought. Being jealous wasn't going to help him. What was he even jealous about anyway?

Taking a deep breath, Seungmin got to his feet. He dusted off his pants and then held out his hand to Yunho.

"Let's go back inside."

"Yeah."

The familiar hand slipped into Seungmin's, all long fingers and a warm palm. It seemed to fit so perfectly. Seungmin squeezed and Yunho jumped to his feet along with him.

"You know," Yunho started, looking down where their bodies still connected, "I'm also thinking about how adorable they are."

"Why?"

Shrugging his shoulders, Yunho pulled away his hand. Just as Seungmin mourned the loss, Yunho wrapped an arm around his shoulders and tugged him closer again.

"Just because," Yunho said, smiling.

Seungmin didn't dare ask more. He didn't want to. It was better if he didn't know who Yunho liked. Why, Seungmin couldn't say, but his heart insisted on staying oblivious.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Seungmin glared at the script. The whole time he had worried about that scene with his character's father that he kinda pushed aside anything else. Specifically the first kiss scene. And who could really blame him? A kiss wasn't as significant.

At least it shouldn't be.

It was all part of the job. Seungmin knew it would happen when he agreed to the role. What would a drama be without a kiss? But it was yet another thing where he kept telling himself that it wouldn't be soon, that he had time to prepare, and then he got caught up in preparing for everything else.

Something cold pressed against his forehead. He sighed and closed his eyes, welcoming the cool touch. The person holding the can chuckled and rolled it back and forth over Seungmin's skin.

"It's too hot, isn't it?" Yunho asked.

Seungmin blinked and glanced up, taking the drink at the same time. For just a moment his fingertips brushed along Yunho's hand and his heart jumped. He ignored it, cracking the can open instead.

"It really is."

Seungmin indulged in the drink for a long moment, humming appreciatively at the sweet taste. He licked his lips and glanced down at the can, then back at Yunho, who quickly looked away. Seungmin swore he had been staring at his lips.

"Where do you get these all the time, by the way?" he asked, holding up the drink.

Yunho smirked. "Why?"

"Because I've looked at every vending machine in the building and none of them have it."

"I know. I got them from the store."

Seungmin's eyes widened. "You're bringing them from home?"

"Yeah. Seonghwa gave me his mini cooler for that."

"But…why?"

"Because you like them," Yunho said, like it was obvious.

"So you got a stock of my favorite drink from some store to give me one every day? You even borrowed a cooler to carry them around?"

Yunho nodded, staring almost confused. Like Seungmin was the crazy one.

"Hyung, isn't that annoying?"

"What? No! No. Why would it be?"

Seungmin frowned. Perhaps he really was the crazy one, because even for a friend, he wouldn't spend money and energy like that. Maybe once just because he was getting something from the store anyway and his friend was with him, but this?

"Why would you spend your money like that, hyung?"

Yunho visibly stiffened. His expression fell, almost like he's hurt, but it never quite slipped into that. Instead, he looked more thoughtful, eyes drifting over the floor as if he would find an answer there.

"I…I just thought it would make you happy," Yunho eventually confessed.

Unlike the heat from the summer weather crawling all over Seungmin's skin, Yunho's words spread a warmth like a comfortable blanket. Seungmin wanted to bury himself in it. His heart threatened to beat right out of his chest, and he was sure he was the crazy one.

"Thank you, hyung…"

Yunho glanced back. A small smile softened his face, and Seungmin smiled back.

"Don't worry about it. It's really no big deal for me. The drink is good, so…it's a win for me too."

"Right. Still, I appreciate it."

"Good."

Whatever was going on with Seungmin's heart surely couldn't be healthy. It swelled under Yunho's attention, blooming open like a rose, and Seungmin wondered how much Yunho could see of it. Probably more than Seungmin himself, who didn't understand his own body anymore.

Even before that conversation on the staircase, even before kingdom, since the moment they walked into each other in the kitchen, Seungmin's body did everything to confuse him. And it was always related to Yunho. He was sure his heart was going to explode one day if Yunho kept smiling at him like that. Like Seungmin hung the stars in the sky. Wasn't this what they always talked about in romance novels?

Yunho glanced down and Seungmin released a shaky breath, following his gaze, because what else was he supposed to do? Staring at Yunho was only going to dig this rabbit hole deeper.

"Are you nervous?" Yunho asked, peering at Seungmin from the side.

"What?"

"About the kissing scene."

"Oh."

Oh indeed. Seungmin had almost forgotten about it again, but it was never that easy. One more scene before lunch break, then he had to face a whole new challenge.

He sighed.

"It's stupid, honestly. I mean, truth or dare? Doesn't this only happen in American movies?"

Yunho chuckled. "I think it's fun."

"Is it? Have you ever kissed someone in a game like this?"

"Yep. You didn't?"

"No? I’ve never played truth or dare."

Gasping, Yunho leaned in closer, one hand finding its place on top of Seungmin's thigh. He flinched at the touch, the palm hot like lava. Yunho immediately pulled back again, sparing his own hand a single glare before going back to smiling.

"Next time Ateez and Stray Kids come together, we'll play truth or dare. That's a promise."

"With alcohol?"

"Of course!"

"Minho is going to love that."

Another soft chuckle from Yunho, the sound burning itself right into Seungmin's mind.

"Have you…" Seungmin continued, searching Yunho's eyes, "Have you kissed a lot of people?"

"Why so curious?"

Seungmin huffed, pursing his lips into a pout. "Am I not allowed?"

"You are, but…" Yunho hummed thoughtfully.

He leaned in closer, eyes intently fixated on Seungmin. Like he was trying to break Seungmin apart, skin and flesh and bone, to expose whatever intention lingered behind the questions.

"Have you kissed someone for a game?" Yunho asked.

"No?"

Heat creeped into Seungmin's cheeks, like lava under every inch of skin. Yunho drew even closer. His breath ghosted along Seungmin's face, chasing shivers down his spine.

Tilting his head, Yunho looked all over Seungmin's face, like trying to remember every pore and line.

"Have you kissed anyone before?"

Seungmin sucked in a breath and Yunho huffed, voice so soft and low, just for Seungmin to hear.

"You haven't."

"No…"

Slowly, Yunho pulled back. Seungmin exhaled shakily and dropped his head, eyes falling shut. His chest strained against his rapidly beating heart, hands trembling where they desperately held onto the armrests of his chair.

It wasn't even that embarrassing to admit he never kissed anyone. It was the way Yunho eyed him that had his throat dry and stomach twisting. He always seemed to search for something in Seungmin's face, but Seungmin couldn't imagine what.

Yunho cleared his throat.

"Isn't it weird then to have your first kiss just be acting?"

Seungmin glanced up, finding the other man's eyes already on him. At this point, he wasn't even surprised anymore. Yunho always stared at him. No matter if they were talking or not.

"A little, perhaps, but I didn't think about it when I accepted the role. Now it's kinda too late."

"Not necessarily."

"What? Should I go out during lunch break and find someone last minute?"

Yunho chuckled sweetly, and Seungmin's heart skipped a beat.

"It's worth a try."

"I rather eat."

"Or, you know…" Yunho took a deep breath, looking away for a second, "if we have to kiss anyway…"

Somewhere in the back of his mind did Seungmin know where this was going, but he deliberately ignored this spark of hope.

Hope?

What was he even thinking?

"I mean," Yunho continued, "I can at least make your first kiss a bit more special. Real."

And there it was.

"You want us to… kiss before the actual filming?"

Yunho nodded, and Seungmin was sure his mind just broke a little. Kissing Yunho for a scene was one thing, but outside of that? In a personal setting with just them?

He shook his head, trying to shake his thoughts into place. But of course Yunho took it the wrong way. His expression fell, as if he was actually, genuinely disappointed.

"If you don't want to, that's okay."

"What? Oh no! I want to!"

Seungmin bit his own tongue and rubbed his hands over his face, hoping this was all a weird dream. His face burned, mind a mess of too many emotions he couldn't quite understand. It was just a kiss. He had never made a big deal out of his potential first kiss, but that wasn't even the problem.

Yunho was. Kissing Yunho was the problem. Why, Seungmin had no idea, but the prospect had excitement blooming in his chest, filling every nook and cranny like trying to break him from inside.

Seungmin took a deep breath and sank deeper into his chair, daring a glance at Yunho. Something akin to hope sparked in his eyes. Or maybe Seungmin was projecting.

"I want to. It would be nice, hyung."

"Nice. Yeah."

Their eyes met. A spark jumped between them, graspable like a breath. It settled deep inside Seungmin, igniting something he refused to acknowledge, like an itch he couldn't reach. If he ignored it, it would go away.

Except it didn't. Every moment Seungmin had more than a second to think during the next two hours, his mind came back to the itch. It only got worse whenever he was around Yunho. Which was a lot, the scene building up to the big kiss, the tension growing between their characters. But every glance, every word, the briefest of touch, fueled the spark, allowing it to grow into a flame.

"Okay, lunch break, everyone!"

Seungmin deflated against the nearest wall. He checked his phone, but even the Stray Kids group chat was dead silent. Social media was off, he couldn't risk anyone seeing his private accounts. Nothing to distract him.

For a moment, he considered texting one of his friends, but just as he opened the chat with Changbin, someone stepped next to him.

He glanced up and immediately, his mind went blank. Whatever greeting he had planned to say died in his throat and he only let out a little choked noise.

Yunho chuckled.

"Hey to you too. Let's get something to eat. I know a quiet place where we can…talk."

"Yeah. Sure, yeah."

Sliding his phone back into his pocket, Seungmin followed Yunho. No hesitation, at least in his movements, but his brain stuttered like a buffering computer.

They got some sandwiches and more drinks from Yunho's cooler. Not a single word was spoken. Seungmin wondered if Yunho's nerves were just as fried as his or if maybe he was just giving Seungmin space. Or both. Though, knowing Yunho, he was just being polite and letting Seungmin simmer in his panic. Not that Yunho had any idea. Or any reason to feel the same.

Why was Seungmin panicking anyway? No, he definitely knew. He knew and he was simply ignoring it, but the itch grew and grew as they walked in silence.

Seungmin almost thought there was no goal to their walk, but then they stopped at one of the warehouses. Yunho looked around. Seemingly sure no one was watching, he grabbed Seungmin's hand and pulled him inside.

The door fell shut, and a peaceful silence welcomed them. With rows and rows of furniture filling the space, there wasn't much of an echo as they moved again. It was nice. Quiet and alone. A change from all the pressure of filming, like they didn't have to worry about anything in this warehouse.

"We're not allowed in here, are we?" Seungmin asked.

"Nope, but we'll be careful. There!"

Following where Yunho pointed, Seungmin spotted a line of closets like a wall. As they approached, they found a couch and a fitting table hidden behind. Like someone specifically put it here to sit and not just for storing.

They sat down, putting the sandwiches on the table. And then they just stared at them. For once, Yunho's attention wasn't on Seungmin. Or perhaps it was, he just didn't look at him, maybe he was as nervous as Seungmin after all.

"So…" Yunho rubbed his hands together, looking over the displayed food. "Should we eat first or…you know…"

"Eat first."

Anything to delay the inevitable. As if that was going to help his beating heart and strained nerves. As if he didn't want to do this. He very much wanted to and every second that melted away sprinkled a little more oil into the flame.

Every bite weighed heavy in his throat. Seungmin swallowed like he was forced to, chewing slowly, barely finishing one sandwich by the time Yunho had eaten three. But not only was Seungmin worried he was going to throw up, he was distracted.

How many times had Seungmin now thought about how attractive Yunho is? Too many to possibly keep track of. But who could blame him? He was all soft lines and fluffy hair and dark eyes that invited to get lost. Atinys were right when they said he looked like a perfect boyfriend or even a husband. A face every mother would love.

And Seungmin couldn't help but stare, especially at his lips. Every now and then, Yunho's tongue darted out, running over his lips until they glistened with spit. The action had Seungmin's mind running wild imagining how it would feel if Yunho licked his lips.

"Are you done?" Yunho eventually asked after his fourth sandwich.

Seungmin tensed up, following his gesture at the two sandwiches still left. One was barely enough to feel his stomach, but Seungmin couldn't take more, not with his stomach twisting and his heart jumping all around.

"Yeah, I'm done."

"Okay. Cool."

Yunho checked his phone, humming thoughtfully.

"We have ten more minutes. Should we…try it now?"

"Kissing?"

A soft flush spread across Yunho's cheeks as he nodded. For once, he actually rivaled Seungmin in embarrassment and as if he wasn't already handsome, now he was cute too.

Seungmin cleared his throat and turned his whole body to Yunho, one leg on the couch. Yunho did the same, smiling bashfully. They both shuffled closer, as close as they could, and Yunho lifted a hand. Warm fingertips brushed Seungmin's cheek, the touch hesitant.

"Can I?" Yunho asked.

"Yeah."

Just like that other day, a warm palm slotted against the side of Seungmin's face like a perfect puzzle piece. He leaned into the touch, eyelids fluttering, but he tried to keep eye contact. Though really, that only made it more difficult to concentrate. Yunho's eyes stretched like an endless forest in the night, where the leaves whispered an invitation to wander deep. And Seungmin would have walked as deep as he could if Yunho asked him to.

"Just relax. Let me take the lead," Yunho whispered.

Seungmin nodded, swallowing.

They inched closer and closer, their breaths mingling hot. Taking a deep breath, Seungmin closed his eyes, fingers digging harder into his thighs. For a moment, he thought it was never going to happen. Like he was going to wake up and Yunho turned out to be nothing more than a wonderful dream.

Then their lips met. A gentle brush that ignited a flame deep inside Seungmin. He melted into the touch and one hand found the front of Yunho's shirt, clinging and tugging him closer. They both tilted their heads to opposite sides. Their lips effortlessly slotted together like two puzzle pieces. Seungmin shivered hot, chest straining around his fluttering heart. The flame grew with every melting second, crawling under his skin and leaving him breathless.

He gasped as Yunho pulled away. Their eyes found each other and desire sparked deep in the forest stretching before Seungmin, matching the desperation in him. For the first time, Seungmin understood.

He pulled Yunho back into another kiss, lips falling open around a soft sigh that was swallowed by an eager mouth. They fell deeper and deeper into each other, lips and tongues and teeth meeting with each slide, each drag. Seungmin clung to Yunho's shirt for dear life, losing himself between the trees. In return, Yunho slipped a hand into Seungmin's hair, fingers tangling into and tugging at the black strands.

The flame rapidly bloomed into a whole fire and Seungmin could only succumb to its embrace. Piece by piece, he broke apart in the heat, crumbling into nothing but ashes. Yunho seemed to catch all of him.

They both tore away almost simultaneously. Chests heaved and hands slipped away. Deep red painted Yunho's face, same for Seungmin probably, but he only had the warmth in his cheeks to attest to that.

He pulled his trembling fingers to his chest and dropped his gaze, finding Yunho tugging at a loose strand on his pants. Whatever Seungmin could have said at that moment fell away as a voice echoed through the warehouse.

Yunho perked up, eyes wide. Footsteps drew closer and without a word, he grabbed Seungmin's shoulders and pushed him back. Seungmin squeezed his eyes shut, mind dizzy as he fell into the soft cushions. The big hands grew heavy on his shoulders, effectively pinning him down, but that was nothing against the weight suddenly blanketing his whole body. A soft "Quiet" brushed his ear, the hot breath so close. Seungmin shuddered and squeezed his eyes tighter.

The footsteps walked past them, soon subsiding just to disappear entirely. Slowly, Seungmin opened his eyes and glanced down at himself. All he found was hazel hair and broad shoulders blocking his view. He stared like a deer caught in the headlights, only slowly comprehending that the weight on top of him was Yunho. It had his heart beating faster and mind reeling with the warmth and heaviness, the way Yunho covered him whole.

Seungmin choked on a breath and Yunho lifted his head. They found each other's eyes. Need filled them both, Seungmin could tell. For the first time, he knew. He understood. He opened his mouth to ask for more, but Yunho's eyes widened in realization. Stumbling over apologies, he scrambled to his feet and looked around. Seungmin slowly followed, finding them alone, but somewhere far away, someone was moving around the furniture. Yunho grabbed his hand and they ran.

Someone shouted behind them. They kept running. The door sprung open and they both stumbled, but never stopped. Yunho's fingers squeezed tightly around Seungmin's hand, almost painfully, but it felt right. He never wanted Yunho to let go.

They slowed down eventually, chests heaving and legs heavy. Seungmin crumbled into a crouch the moment they both stopped and wrapped an arm around his knees, his other hand still clinging to Yunho.

"You okay?" Yunho asked.

Seungmin glanced up, blinking against the sun peeking over Yunho's shoulders. As his eyes adjusted, his heart skipped a beat.

From the beginning, Seungmin had thought about how handsome Yunho is. From the firm but soft structure of his face to the big eyes that exuded nothing but kindness, his height to his lean muscles, and most importantly, his gentle smile. He had always made Seungmin's heart flutter with a single look. Yet, something had changed while remaining the same. Seungmin understood why he felt like floating whenever Yunho was close.

Yunho squeezed around his hand.

"Seungminnie?"

"W-what?"

"Are you okay?"

"Oh. Yeah."

Seungmin scrambled back to his feet, gripping tighter around the warm palm pressed against his'. Yunho smiled and his hold loosened. For a moment, Seungmin tightened his hand, but quickly let go again. The contact slipped away and with it, any warmth. A cold shudder chased down Seungmin's spine and he dropped his head. The hand that had just held his', pressed against his back as Yunho shuffled closer.

"Are you ready for the next scene?"

Seungmin slowly nodded.

"Good! Let's go back then," Yunho said.

Dazed, Seungmin followed the taller man, eyes fixed on the ground where he could only see Yunho's sneakers. His mind reeled with what happened and all the emotions overflowing in his chest. He stared at his own hand, his lips tingling. Everything he had believed before seemed so far away now. The one thing he had been so sure he had never felt, now had his whole being in its unrelenting grip.

It wasn't much different in front of the camera. Even with people watching, the kiss regulated and pre-scripted, a million fireworks went off inside Seungmin as their lips touched again. He almost forgot to keep it chaste, leaning in too deep for just a moment. Need shuddered through him, begging for more, like an addict in withdrawal. As they parted and Seungmin caught Yunho's dark eyes, his heart burst at the seams.

Just this morning, Seungmin was sure he had never experienced love. No matter how much he thought about Yunho, what it would be like to kiss him, to be held by him. Jealousy infested his heart when wondering who Yunho likes. It had been so easy to ignore, but now he got a taste. Like a beast had been awakened from a long slumber, it rattled at its cage

Seungmin was hopelessly in love with Yunho.

~~~~~~~~~

Figuring out his own feelings was one thing, that was a big revelation for Seungmin. But it was the question about what to do with these feelings that kept him awake at night. He couldn't talk to anyone about it. He didn't know how. Every time he tried, it felt wrong. Why, he didn't know. Maybe guilt. Maybe hopelessness.

Seungmin didn't have a chance anyway, what good would it do to talk about it? He remembered the smile and sparkling eyes when Yunho thought about the person he likes. That was love. Seungmin could never compete with that, because his love for Yunho was probably just as strong. If Seungmin could, he would have turned back time, refused the kiss, any kiss, and continue to live in ignorant bliss.

But that was impossible.

It didn't matter anymore.

The last day of shooting came and Seungmin accepted his place. He accepted his own failure, the deep-rooted pain that came with unrequited love. Not everyone got a happy ending.

It was just that more difficult to get the last scene done.

Standing there, on the bridge, cold wind nipping at the tip of his nose, Seungmin wanted to be anywhere but here. But dozens of pairs of eyes watched him closely, expectations in them all.

"Haechan."

Seungmin wondered how his own name would sound if Yunho said it like that, dripping with desperation.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Slowly, he turned his head, studying Yunho's face. A perfect expression that matched his voice. Like he truly did feel what he was supposed to portray. Seungmin definitely did, this spark of hope, kept small by reality, so sure it was never going to happen.

"Haechan, I-" Yunho gasped like he had run a marathon, fingers squeezing around his thighs. "-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Their eyes met and Seungmin's chest tightened.

"Please don't, hyung-"

"Just let me explain!"

Yunho stepped closer. Swallowing, Seungmin tightened his grip on the railing, forcing his body to stay still. Yunho hesitated for a brief moment, just long for Seungmin to notice, but then reached out as he was supposed to and put his hand over Seungmin's.

"Haechan, I swear it wasn't what you thought."

"Do you like her?"

"No! No, I…"

Yunho dropped his head and his fingers gently wrapped around Seungmin's peeling them off the cold metal. He pulled them towards his chest and splayed Seungmin's palm out over it. Heat soaked through the thin shirt, underneath firm muscles and a rapidly beating heart.

"You're the only one who makes me feel this way."

Seungmin swallowed, glancing down where they touched.

"What way?"

"You know what."

Seungmin glanced back up, fingers twisting around Yunho's shirt. He pulled him closer and Yunho audibly gasped.

"I want you to say it, hyung."

"Haechan…"

"We both know, but I," Seungmin gripped tighter. "I need you to say it."

Yunho slipped his other hand around Seungmin's as well, pulling it off his chest to instead hold it tightly between his palms. The touch burned and Seungmin fought the urge to pull away. He couldn't fight the heat creeping under his skin, though, seeping into his flesh down to his very bone, warming his face and tingling in his eyes. He blinked a few times, pupils darting back and forth between their hands and the other man's face.

"Haechan…"

Yunho stepped closer, leaning so close, his breath ghosted along Seungmin's skin.

"I love you, Haechan."

A shudder chased down Seungmin's spine and their eyes met. Yunho drew closer and closer, every line of his face twisting into a labyrinth that Seungmin couldn't escape.

His breath died as their lips met. Seungmin's eyes fluttered shut, his heart exploding into a million sparks. He leaned in closer and Yunho's hand squeezed around Seungmin’s, like holding onto a lifeline, but Seungmin was sure he just imagined. Hoping. Praying. If Yunho felt the same-

"Cut!"

They broke apart and Yunho glanced over to the director while Seungmin dropped his gaze to the ground. He inhaled a shaky breath, shuddering with the exhale. Closing his eyes, Seungmin tried to find what he was supposed to say next, but nothing. A yawning silence stretched in his mind. There was only the warmth originating from Yunho.

Somehow, Seungmin survived the rest of the shoot. He felt like he had blacked out and the next he knew was everyone congratulating them for a job well done. Seungmin smiled, bowed, thanked them all, going through the motions until Yunho pulled him aside. They quietly walked to the dressing room, where Yunho pulled out two more cans of Seungmin's favorite drink.

"It's the last two. Do you want both or should we share?"

Seungmin blinked. Yunho smiled, tilting his head in question. A light flush still painted his cheeks and the tip of his nose from the cold. His hair fell softly over his forehead, following every little movement where it didn't stick to his sweaty skin. He looked so unfairly beautiful, Seungmin had to look away as he accepted one of the cans.

"Let's share…"

They sat down on one of the benches and pulled out their phones. Seungmin frowned at the amount of messages in the group chat, but opened it anyway, afraid to let his mind wander in the silence.

Jisung and Hyunjin had argued about some new album and what song is the best. Minho had shut them down with promises of snacks. A few complaints about Chan and Changbin leaving certain…things in the living room, Seungmin chose not to think about the details. The whole thing was interrupted anyway by Felix, who asked everyone to get ready. For what, they didn't specify. Curious, Seungmin mentioned he was done filming and hoped they would invite him to whatever this was about.

Yunho gently nudged his side and Seungmin turned around, meeting his smile and phone screen. He had his own group chat open and the last message was from Seonghwa, telling Yunho to bring Seungmin to their dorm.

"For what?"

Yunho chuckled, pulling away again.

"Wooyoung has made us dinner, apparently. To congratulate us on finishing the drama."

"Wooyoung-hyung can cook?"

Laughing again, Yunho patted Seungmin's shoulder, his smile so bright, Seungmin couldn't help but return it.

"He can and he's actually really good! You should join me."

"I'm surprised they want me to come too."

"Why not? You're a friend."

Seungmin hummed, looking back down on his own phone. Some of the members congratulated Seungmin, but no one mentioned that they were going out, so Seungmin assumed that they either didn't expect him to come home early enough to join, or it was some secret mission he couldn't know about.

He sighed.

"Yeah, okay, I wanted to see Jongho again anyway."

"He's going to be happy."

It was tempting to ask Yunho if he was happy too, but Seungmin just smiled and nodded.

They got to the dorm almost two hours later. The director had insisted on a small celebration before they left, mostly so some of the staff could give them gifts and shower them with compliments. Seungmin didn't feel like he had done a good job, not with Yunho as his co-star. Everyone would have looked bad next to him. It was only natural he got the most compliments. Seungmin wished he could have said something too, but every time Yunho looked at him, his throat tightened, and his heart drowned deeper and deeper with the realization that this was the end.

They would go back to how it was before. Even if they called each other friend, what reason was there for them to keep meeting up? Yunho had better things to do, someone else whose presence he longed for. And Seungmin was too pained to imagine spending more time with Yunho when all it did was remind him of what he couldn't have.

He hated his feelings. He hated love. If he could, he would have gladly gone back to a state of obliviousness. He didn't want to be in love with Yunho and yet, here he was, weak in his knees with every smile.

The Ateez dorm welcomed them with eerie silence. They both glanced at each other, hesitant, as they slipped out their shoes and jackets. Seungmin followed Yunho with a sense of awe and an uneasy feeling.

It was the first time he was visiting the dorm and considering he already knew some of the other members, he had expected much more noise. But it seemed like Yunho expected more as well with how warily he walked down the hallway towards the living room.

They rounded the corner and Yunho turned on the light.

"Congratulations!"

Seungmin jumped behind Yunho, grabbing his shirt. He was sure his soul had left his body, and only after hearing Wooyoung's hyena laugh did he peek out behind Yunho into the living room. His eyes widened at the view of over a dozen smiling faces looking back. Not just Ateez had gathered, but Stray Kids too, all wearing little party hats.

"Guys," Yunho chuckled softly, "isn't this a bit too much?"

Seungmin followed him deeper into the living room, fingers still loosely holding onto the white shirt. He looked around and huffed out a small chuckle. Way too colorful decoration adorned the space, making it look like someone's birthday, the table holding plates full of food and even a big cake with candles on top. Two candles, to be exact. One in the shape of an S and the other a Y.

Heat creeped into Seungmin's cheeks and he quickly looked away again, just as Seonghwa and Minho stepped closer.

"Too much?" Minho asked, raising an eyebrow. "Is that how you say thank you?"

"You two worked so hard, you deserve something nice," Seonghwa chimed in.

"And all we got for Imitation was a firm handshake from Hongjoong hyung," Yunho said, smirking.

"You were four people then! Too much work. Besides-" Hongjoong gestured at the Stray Kids members. "-We weren't alone this time."

"And we hope you guys feel loved and appreciated," Felix said.

"Oh, we do. Right, Minnie?"

Smiling brighter than the sun, Yunho looked over his shoulder at Seungmin.

"Right." He stepped next to Yunho and bowed. "Thank you."

Minho huffed, rolling his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, I know we're great. Now sit down, so we can eat."

They all gathered around the table, most of them squeezed between each other for room on the couch. Both Seungmin and Yunho took a spot on the floor, shoulders and knees touching. The warmth radiating from Yunho seeped into every inch of Seungmin's body and the moment he was offered an ice-cold cola, he accepted, just anything to keep his mind off the firm body next to him.

Barely twenty minutes in, truth or dare was suggested. Seungmin was sure both Jisung and Wooyoung were already drunk when they brought it up, but everyone else agreed. Almost everyone. Though, Seungmin and Seonghwa weren't given much choice at the end.

Yunho seemed really into it, choosing dare without hesitation at his turn. Seungmin had to admire him as he did ten push-ups with San on his back, but he also couldn't help the sting in his chest as San hugged him afterwards, both giggling. It was almost enough to get Seungmin to accept the alcohol Minho kept offering him, but he knew how that would end up. An embarrassing confession.

"Seungminnie-"

He glanced up at Hyunjin's big grin.

"-truth or dare?"

"Truth…"

Someone booed from the couch, someone else cursed about wine that was spilled. Seungmin kept his eyes on his own drink, as if he could drown himself in it, drown his emotions that keep growing, all while Yunho continued to whisper and giggle with San.

Hyunjin cleared his throat, bringing Seungmin’s attention back to him.

"Okay, Minnie, how was kissing Yunho hyung?"

Seungmin stiffened and slowly raised his head, eyes growing wide. Most of the background talk died down, including the one conversation right next to him.

Swallowing, Seungmin side glanced at Yunho, finding his attention fixed on him. Seungmin's heart skipped a beat. He dropped his eyes again and shifted in his place, chest tight, mouth dry. Hyunjin whistled as Seungmin took a sip from his cola, and he wished the ground would swallow him whole.

"Minnie~"

Seungmin looked up, pulling his eyebrows together. Nobody knew he had never kissed anyone before and it was going to stay that way, same with his crush on Yunho. But everyone was staring at him like they knew. It couldn't have been that obvious, could it?

Seungmin shrugged his shoulders, finally finding his voice again.

"It was a kiss. Exactly what you expect."

"Details!" Jisung chimed in. "Did you use tongue?"

Heat creeped into Seungmin's cheeks and his head sunk deeper between his shoulders like a turtle trying to pull into its shell.

"I bet Yunho is a good kisser," Minho said.

"Oh, he is!"

Seungmin's heart sank. Not daring to lift his head, he peeked through his lashes at San. A bright smile stretched across San’s face, growing even further as some of the others spilled questions over him. He really was handsome. Seungmin could understand why Yunho liked him.

"Sannie-" Yunho waved everyone's questions off, frowning deeply. "-I thought we agreed not to tell."

"I think San-ah is drunk." Seonghwa pointed at the half empty bottle of sake San was hoarding in his lap.

"I'm not! And I didn't lie!"

"Okay, but you can't just say that without telling us what happened," Jeongin said.

Some agreed, while both Seonghwa and Chan tried to calm them down, insisting on just continuing the game. But everyone's collective curiosity prevailed.

Seungmin wanted to be anywhere but here. The temptation of the soju bottle in front of him tingled in his fingertips and on his tongue.

San giggled. "It was actually kinda stupid."

"Really? You're going to be like that?" Yunho huffed and leaned back, his arm brushing Seungmin in the process

Seungmin jerked back and their eyes met. Yunho's eyes widened just to narrow into slits, the usually warm brown turning a swallowing black. A shiver chased down Seungmin's spine and he scrambled to his feet, hitting the table and spilling at least one glass. He bowed deep, stumbling through his apology. A warm hand found its place on his shoulder and he shook it off, finding Yunho standing next to him.

"Are you okay?"

Seungmin swallowed.

"Yes. I just…I need some fresh air."

Yunho called after him as he left the room. He kept his dignity by not running, but the instinct to, screamed in the back of his mind. With every step it seemed to grow stronger and the moment he stepped outside into the cold night, he gave in, letting his feet take him away, anywhere. He didn't care. He just needed to get away.

Seungmin stopped at a playground. A soft huff of laughter escaped him as he dropped on one of the swings. Why was it always playgrounds where big confessions happened in dramas?

Seungmin leaned against the chain, eyes slowly drifting around. Did people really confess important things in this place? Whispering them into the night where no one could hear, the swings and play structure engraved with secrets of lovers and friends. Seungmin had seen a young teenager couple once, who had drawn a heart with their initials on the inside of a slide. Perhaps there was something about it after all.

Was it this inherent loneliness of a place quiet when you expect it to be full of noise? Like an abandoned shopping mall or a theme park? Did this disconnect make one feel vulnerable and by extension more open?

"Seungmin!"

He blinked once, twice, then rubbed his eyes as if he couldn't believe what he saw. It was real, though. Yunho was running towards him. Why? Why had he followed Seungmin?

Seungmin gripped the swing chain tighter, the metal already warmed up against his palm. He didn't move an inch as Yunho took a seat in the swing next to him, panting and groaning, one hand over his chest.

"You're fast, you know that?"

Seungmin looked down at his stretched out legs, pressing the tips of his shoes together.

"Am I?" He whispered.

Yunho huffed. "Maybe I'm just too slow."

"Maybe. Why did you even follow me?"

"I was worried."

Their eyes met and Seungmin's chest strained, like big claws dug themselves into his skin and flesh, down to his very bone. A simple glance and everything seemed to be laid bare. Maybe they really did all know. Maybe even Yunho, and now he was here to rip out the last piece of Seungmin's heart.

"Worried?"

The word burned on Seungmin's tongue. The meaning twisted his stomach, pulling his insides apart until everything would spill.

"Of course. You were really pale. I thought that maybe-"

Yunho stilled, mouth falling shut. He looked away and pulled a fist to his face, covering his thinly pressed lips. Something worked behind his eyes, trying to swim to the surface, but he blinked it away and a deep sigh spilled into the cool night air.

"I thought that the others made you uncomfortable with the whole kiss question…"

"Ah."

Seungmin gripped both swing chains and slowly swung back and forth, just a little, just enough to kill the urge to run away again.

"It wasn't like that," Seungmin continued, looking up at the endless black void of the night sky.

"No? What was it then?"

Seungmin stopped the swing and met Yunho's curious face. His pale skin seemed to shine in the soft streetlights, smooth and soft, not a flaw in sight. The brown hair framing it all, was messy from running, sticking out in places and yet still so inviting to run one's fingers through it. His broad frame dwarfed the swing, barely fitting between the chains, and Seungmin still remembered the firm chest pressed against his back.

Yunho was perfect. Even now, he was a sweet gentleman full of care and worry for other people when Seungmin didn't deserve it. He had fallen in love with someone who he knew perfectly well had given his heart to someone else already.

Seungmin took a deep breath, willing the burn to fade away.

"It doesn't matter."

"It does!"

Yunho's fingers curled around Seungmin's wrist and tugged his hand closer. Their palms pressed together, fingers squeezing gently where they held each other, hanging between them and the swings. Yunho's thumb rubbed gently over the back of Seungmin's hand, and the tears grew more persistent.

"Hyung, I-"

"Listen, if you don't want to tell me, that's fine, but this is obviously about a lot more. You should talk to someone."

Seungmin looked up from their hands at Yunho's face. The genuine concern softening his expression was all Seungmin needed to lose control and the first tears spilled down his cheeks. A sob wrecked his body. He immediately wiped his free hand over his face, the other still in Yunho's gentle grip.

If only he had stayed oblivious to falling in love. Bliss was man's greatest gift. Why had he asked to know? He hated this, the ache growing in the back of his head, matching the one in his heart. He rather got torn apart under Yunho's scrutiny until nothing was left.

But he couldn't control the tears and sobs. No matter how damp his sleeve was getting, it didn't stop, and he wiped and wiped and-

Seungmin flinched as a firm hand pressed against his back. He let it lead him and buried his face in Yunho's stomach. While Yunho still held on tightly to his hand, Seungmin gripped Yunho's sweater with the other, nails scratching at his back as Seungmin's twisted his fingers around the fabric.

Tears stained the cotton and sobs wrecked through his body. Apologies spilled in between, incoherent, swept away by the wind too quickly. Seungmin's mind reeled with anything that was Yunho; The smell of flowers, his warmth like a thick blanket, his hand rubbing over Seungmin's back and the other squeezing reassuringly around his fingers, his deep voice whispering comfort that Seungmin couldn't quite grasp. All the while his heart broke apart around the overflowing feelings, regret and guilt and love alike.

As the tears died, Seungmin's mind calmed as well. He took a shaky breath, hiccuping once more. His grip loosened on Yunho's sweater. Slowly, he leaned back, wiping his cheeks again. He twitched a little at the burn of his raw skin, like the tears had scraped at it with sandpaper. Closing his eyes, he inhaled deeply again, holding it for a few seconds before releasing into a soft exhale.

Yunho squeezed around Seungmin's hand. He lifted his head, meeting Yunho's smile.

"Feeling a bit better?"

"Maybe. I don't know."

Yunho huffed sympathetically and crouched down. He put his arms over Seungmin's legs, eyes fixed on where their hands still stuck together.

"Do you want to go back?"

"No."

Yunho glanced up in surprise.

"No? Are you sure?"

"Yes, I-" Seungmin pursed his lips. "Why did you and San kiss?"

"Oh. I…well…Why do you ask?"

"Please, just tell me."

Yunho pulled his eyebrows together, eyes darting all over Seungmin's face. To demand such private information wasn't how Seungmin had imagined anything, but he needed to know what was really going on between Yunho and San, if San was the one Yunho liked.

"Well," Yunho shifted a little in his place, looking down at their hands again, "to be honest, I haven't kissed anyone in some time and when I got the role…" He laughed bashfully, "When I got the role, I knew I had to kiss someone, so I wanted to make sure I haven't forgotten how it works."

"You…were worried about being bad?"

"Yep. San was sweet enough to offer his help."

"Is San the person you love?"

Yunho's eyes widened. Something akin to confusion skipped across his expression, gone too fast to fully grasp. Then he laughed.

"You still think he's the one? Why?"

"I don't know, it just seemed like the most logical option."

"Yeah? Well, he isn't the one."

Seungmin slowly nodded. He frowned, brain working hard through all possible options he could think of, but none of them seemed likely. He did halt at his own name for a few moments longer, but threw that thought aside like all the others.

Seungmin sighed and looked back at Yunho.

"Who are you in love with then?"

"You really want to know, huh?"

"You don't have to tell me, hyung."

Yunho huffed a short laugh. He looked around for a bit, Seungmin followed him, but the playground remained quiet. Their eyes met again and Yunho smiled.

"I love you."

"What?"

"The one I love is you, Seungmin."

This was a joke. It had to be. No way was any of this real. Seungmin was dreaming, he had to.

"Me?"

"Yes."

Seungmin blinked. He couldn't even move to pinch himself, stuck under Yunho's intense stare.

"Since when?"

"Since day one, probably."

"What- why?"

"Why I love you?"

Seungmin nodded. Yunho hummed and dropped his head back, staring up at the sky as if the stars would tell him the answer. He looked back at Seungmin, smiling.

"You're just… You amaze me. You seemed so shy at first, but you're actually a ball of energy, always the first to make a joke. Especially when it's to tease others. You're so bold and fun, but sometimes you do get shy. It's cute. Endearing. All of you is. I could watch you all day."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

"I-"

Seungmin dropped his gaze. He squeezed around Yunho's hand, and Yunho squeezed back. It was real. All of it. What Yunho said, why he loves Seungmin, he wouldn't lie about it, wouldn't make a joke about this. He really was in love with Seungmin.

Seungmin laughed. He couldn't help it, covering his mouth to try and silence himself, but it only muffled the sound. His heart fluttered high in the clouds, while his mind could barely wrap itself around this revelation. If he hadn't cried so much before, he might have cried again, but instead he just laughed.

Yunho stared at him in utter bewilderment.

"Did I say something wrong?" he asked.

Seungmin quickly shook his head, waving his hand.

"No, I-" Another burst of laughter. "-I just can't believe it!"

"I thought it was obvious. Especially when I told you what love feels like, I really thought you would catch on."

"Really?" Seungmin huffed, dropping his hand. "I really had no idea."

"Guess I'm better at hiding it than I thought…"

Sighing deeply, Yunho pulled himself to his feet, his hand slowly slipping away.

"I'm fine with staying friends, though." He smiled.

Seungmin gripped his hand tighter, keeping him in place right in front of him. Yunho looked down at him, expression soft, but impossible to pinpoint.

Yunho cleared his throat. "If you don't want to be friends anymore, that's fine too."

"Hyung."

"Yes?"

Seungmin stood up as well, keeping Yunho close. A smile curled his lips and he tilted his head, heat creeping into his cheeks.

"Do you want to know who I'm in love with?"

“You love someone?”

“Yes.”

Yunho’s eyes widened. “Since when?”

“I don’t know. I only realized after you explained it to me.”

“Oh.”

“Do you want to know who it is?”

Yunho hesitated, looking between Seungmin's face and their locked hands. Swallowing, Yunho nodded.

"Are you sure, hyung?"

"Yes."

Gathering all the courage that suddenly seemed to overflow his insides, Seungmin grabbed Yunho's collar and pulled his face closer. His eyes widened and Seungmin smirked. They drew closer and closer, never losing eye contact, even as their eyelids fluttered and narrowed. Yunho's breath stroked Seungmin's lips, chasing a shiver down his spine. For just a moment, Seungmin stilled, wondering once again if this was a dream.

But did it matter?

Their lips met in a chaste touch. Seungmin sighed into it, eyes falling shut. Neither of them moved, but they didn't pull away either. A whole firework show filled Seungmin's insides and his heart threatened to beat out of his chest. Such a simple touch and it was all he could have ever dreamed of, better than he ever imagined.

This was the joy of love that everyone always talked about.

It was Yunho who deepened the kiss. Seungmin shamelessly welcomed his tongue, shuddering as it dipped inside. Every slide of lips and every lick and brush of teeth fueled the mess inside Seungmin, igniting another explosion again and again. His mind reeled with pure happiness and his body trembled with the heat seeping into every inch of skin and flesh, down to his bone. All he could do was hold onto Yunho like a life ring as he was devoured whole.

They pulled apart gasping, panting, barely moving an inch away. Their eyes met and Seungmin swallowed heavily, overwhelmed with the sheer hunger in Yunho's gaze. As if he could never be filled, no matter how much they kiss. Seungmin couldn't say he felt any different, the taste of Yunho forever burned into his lips and tongue. He wasn't sure he ever wanted to taste something else again.

"Is that…your answer?" Yunho whispered.

"Yes."

Yunho huffed and dropped their foreheads together, closing his eyes.

"Please tell me again."

"How?"

"In any way you want…" Yunho looked back again, licking his lips.

Seungmin released a shaky breath.

"Hyung-"

"Yes…"

"-I love you."

They both laughed softly and squeezed the other's hand. Yunho easily caught Seungmin in another kiss, quick, but no less heart fluttering. Then he pulled Seungmin into his arms, leaving no space between them. Seungmin buried his face in Yunho's neck and a content sigh slipped from his lips.

Falling in love really wasn't as easy as dramas portrayed, Seungmin got that right. That didn't mean it wasn't worth trying. If fiction got one thing right, it was the happiness that came with it, a happiness that Seungmin's wouldn't trade for anything.

#stray kids fanfiction #ateez fanfiction #fanfiction #yunho fanfiction #seungmin fanfiction #wooyussy.recs #stray kids seungmin #ateez yunho #skz fanfiction #atz fanfiction #ao3

[starseungs]

lunchtime tea, served by yours truly. ksm.

kim seungmin x fem!reader — getting dragged over to the student council office instead of the cafeteria was far from your lunchtime plans. too bad seungmin seemed to think otherwise.

genre/s — fluff, humor if it counts, historical fantasy, academy au, duke's son!seungmin x marquis' daughter!y/n • 1.3k words

warning/s — petty noble disputes, seungmin implies a nepotism plan (laughs nervously), both of them are in their second to the last year of academy = they're both around 21 !!

note — here's a short fic i whipped up as i finish take a shot ! yes, its inspired by those rofan manhwas with academy arcs/settings. im obsessed with those ngl

2024 ⓒ starseungs on tumblr. do not steal, repost, or edit.

“Would it really be such a crime to enjoy one peaceful lunch session, Your Grace?”

You sank down with a huff on the smooth velvety sofa propped in the middle of the spacious office room, not paying any mind to the way the door shut with a soft click despite your strong swing to open it earlier. A pair of footsteps other than yours echoed in the space, the flat, heavy heels of the figure’s shoes clacking with strong authority. Yet, you remained unfazed despite the strong aura permeating the enclosure—choosing to stand your ground with a click of a tongue.

Seungmin sighed at the sight of your demeanor. 

“And I believe it would be against academy ordinance for you to call me by that title within the campus premises, Lady Y/N.” He reprimands you with a low drawl before carefully taking a seat at his desk located front and center against a massive glass window, his silhouette strengthening as he leans forward to rest his arms on the desk. You could only whine in mockery at his reply.

“Boo,” you scoffed before crossing your arms and craning your head to stare at him. “Such a stickler for the rules, are you not?”

Seungmin hummed. “I suppose you may be right, but could I also offer you information on my father’s well-being?” He says with a tone implying sweetness, even if you knew otherwise. 

“The Duke is alive and well—yes, I am aware,” you pressed for a smile as innocent as you could manage, enjoying the way Seungmin’s formal facade fell apart slightly before getting gathered up once again. The young Lord cleared his throat before continuing the questionable exchange between the two of you.

“Therefore, we should not be having this conversation in the first place.”

“However, you are the heir to the dukedom, if I recall correctly?”

“Yes, you do.”

You then brought your hands together in a resounding clap at his answer, signifying a remarkable conclusion. “Then it is the same thing.”

Seungmin groaned tiredly at your unbelievable words. “It is clearly not—” he suddenly paused mid-sentence. You watched as his eyes narrowed with an inquisitive glint before he took an obvious intake of air. “I’m getting the slight inkling that you are doing this to raise my temper.”

A prominent laugh bubbled its way out of your throat. “I do find that side of you quite charming, yes.”

“I will pretend to not hear your comment, My Lady,” Seungmin pinched the bridge of his nose, desperately trying to subside his growing stress. “And I would like to inform you belatedly that a peaceful lunch should be the last of your priorities at the moment.”

The involuntary squawk that came out of you voiced your offense. “Well, this is surprising news, as I have not received any notice about a new dietary restriction!”

“It is not—” Seungmin caught himself again. You grinned mischievously at his obvious struggle before collecting yourself when you felt a pointed glare being sent in your direction. He exhaled heavily, “Proceeding with the matter at hand, are you aware of the number of complaints the Theta group has placed upon your name?”

“I do believe there has not been a single soul in this academy who has not,” you hummed in acknowledgement.

“My Lady, forgive me for being rude; however, the answer I was hoping for was to be about how you are planning on addressing this issue.”

“Oh,” you blinked. “Then, I plan to do nothing about the issue.”

A small thud was heard from Seungmin’s direction, prompting you to look over to see what had caused such a sound. Low and behold, the sight of the academy’s best student holding his head down towards the polished mahogany desk in defeat—rendering you unsure of what to do next. There had only been a few times in your entire lifetime that you had seen Seungmin completely shatter his dignified demeanor, and you had known the man since you were six. Now you fear that you had actually crossed a line. 

“Y/N,” he raised his head ever so slightly to lock eyes with you, his next order coming out as a plea. “Just explain why you poured a cup of tea over Lady Colette’s head.” 

“Then forgive me as well for my words. However, in my perspective, Theta is nothing but a pathetic excuse for an institutional social group,” you sighed, remembering the events of the tea party yesterday. “I do not know why they still prove to be the most popular social group for ladies when the Zeta group has always been better. Theta are barely anything worth more than a babble of obnoxious noble daughters who prefer to place themselves on a higher pedestal than they deserve. Lady Colette was terrorizing a freshman from a country-side barony. I only did my best to stop her, considering the fact that mere words seemed to hold no interest for her.”

Seungmin raised a brow. “Quite an interesting way of describing them, don’t you think?”

“Well, I did send my apologies before doing so, did I not?” You smiled back as part of your reply, proudly this time. Seungmin could only scoff, albeit greatly amused.

“You have got to stop trying to outsmart me in times like these, Y/N,” he said, standing up. “You of all people should know how much I lack the ability to harbor ill feelings towards you.”

It was your turn to raise an eyebrow at his surprisingly favorable response. For holding the most coveted position of justice available for students in this academy, Seungmin was surely pressing less strongly on your faults. Perhaps it was a good thing that you still made sure to cool the tea before you dumped it on that Marquis’ pompous daughter.

“Playing favorites, are we now, Mr. President?”

Seungmin laughed openly this time. Talk about a change of mood. “I see that you have now chosen to switch to a different formality, yet again,” he mused on his way towards your figure on the couch. “See, you wouldn’t have this much trouble with other noble ladies if you just joined the student council.”

“Here you go again with your offer,” you said, rolling your eyes. “You of all people should know exactly why I cannot take a position in the council, Seungmin.”

“In my opinion, it would be seen as a reasonable training ground for the future Duchess.”

“You just like the way I do paperwork!” You expressed disbelief at his plan’s implication. “And high society might as well burn me into ashes, thinking that I take advantage of my position as your betrothed.”

Seungmin sighed dreamily, completely disregarding your latter comment. “I do love the way you do your paperwork. Such a perfect pair to my work ethic,” he says, sitting comfortably beside you with a relaxed exhale. “Yes, I genuinely do not see what is so wrong about the offer.”

“Seungmin,” you scowled at him. “Do you wish to put a stain on your reputation?”

“Oh, look at you scolding me as if we had already stated our vows,” Seungmin pinched your cheek in a tease. You attempted to push his hand away, only for him to grab it and intertwine your fingers, leaving you breathless as he placed a feathery kiss on your knuckles. “My dearest fiancee, I do not care what others may think of me. If I am able to, I will give anything you ask for without a silver of hesitation.” He gazed directly at your eyes, pupils swimming with unknown desire.

“My Duchess only deserves the best, after all.”

You pursed your lip at his intimate actions, feeling your stomach do crazed flips at his undivided attention. “It is quite concerning how biased you seem to be when it comes to this matter, Mr. President,” you gave in, letting yourself fall on his broad shoulder. “What have I even done to warrant your unyielding obsession with me?”

Seungmin’s chest rumbled in delight, the lull comforting your mind glazed over with his presence.

“Exist. Now, what do you think of becoming Vice President next year?”

“Serve me tea first, and I'll think about it.”

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[myseungsunglove]

First Pitch | Ksm

Pairing: Kim Seungmin x reader 

Warnings: angsty, wrapped in fluff

Word Count:  1.2k

𖠫Summary: Seungmin struggles to understand why his fiance can’t be by his side on one of the most important days of his life. 

✎A/N✎: This has just been floating around in my head since Seungmin threw his first pitch. It’s nothing special, but I’m kind of in love with it. Hope someone out there likes it, if any of you remember that I actually write since it’s been over a month. hides in shame 

◠ ◡ ◠᭚ιαᵕ̈

「©  April 11, 2024 by myseungsunglove」

You sit in the car on the drive to the stadium and the mood is somber. Seungmin is nervous about throwing the first pitch of the game between the All Korea team and the LA Dodgers, a team that he has always admired. 

Couple that with the fact that you aren't allowed to be there with him during one of the biggest moments of his life and you could cut the tension in the car with a knife. Seungmin had wanted you by his side for the first pitch and the company had given the both of you a resounding no. You understood why, and at the end of the day, you believe that Seungmin did too, but it didn’t mean that he was happy about it. 

“Explain it to me one more time,” he mutters, interlacing his long fingers with yours as he glares at the back of the manager's head. “Like I’m five.” You know the anger isn’t necessarily directed at your manager, but when Seungmin has his mind set on something that seems logical to him, he just can’t let it go. He is stubborn that way.

The manager sighs audibly from the front seat, his shoulders rising and falling visibly as he turns to face the two of you. 

“Seungmin, we’ve gone over this many times,” he responds patiently, avoiding the discussion altogether. 

“So go over it again,” Seungmin snaps. 

“Seung,” you whisper beside him, squeezing his hand gently. He doesn’t look at you. 

“Please,” he adds for your benefit. 

The manager blinks slowly at him, empathy coupled with patience etched on his face. 

“Y/n would be the only member of SKZ that is here with you when everyone else’s schedules are too busy,” your manager starts. "Frankly, her schedule is too busy to even be here as long as she is."

“Y/n is the only member of SKZ that I’m engaged to, so it makes sense that she’s here,” Seungmin retorts. “I fail to see the issue.” 

The manager sighs heavily. 

“You are well aware that the public doesn’t know that. They don’t even know you’re together. If she is the only one to show up at your first pitch, people will talk. Everyone will speculate. They already do and this will just add fuel to the fire.”

“Let them talk,” Seungmin says with a shrug, his brow set. He’s nothing if not determined. 

“Minnie,” you whisper beside him. His attention is pulled away from the manager, his frustrated puppy eyes turning on you like a weapon. “If I’m the only one here, if people start to talk, this event, this huge opportunity for you becomes about us and what we are. It’s no longer about this awesome opportunity that you are getting,” you tell him. "If even one of the guys could have come too, maybe it would be different, but you know we're preparing for the fanmeeting and a comeback. There is no time." You squeeze his hand gently. "But I made time."

He scowls at you, but it’s soft, as he considers your argument.

“I know,” he relents, looking down at your clasped hands, rubbing over the top of your hand gently. His cheeks puff out in frustration and he blows all the air from them before he speaks again. “But I need you there,” he whines. 

It isn't often that Seungmin admits that he needs anyone. His confession makes your heart clench in your chest. You’ve never seen him this nervous before. Not even when he proposed to you. 

With your free hand, you gently place your palm against his cheek and lift his face so that you are eye to eye. 

“I love you more than the air I breathe, Kim Seungmin,” you tell him. 

He leans in and kisses you. It’s soft and slow, his hands parting from yours so that he can grab your waist and pull you into his arms. When he pulls away a little breathless, you speak again. 

“And I will be there,” you assure him. Your manager turns around to look at you, a slightly concerned look on his face. You scowl back at him, a look that tells him you’ve got this under control and to chill out. “I won’t be right beside you, but I've got a seat right behind the catcher. I’ll have the best seat in the house. I’ll be able to see your pretty face and the best opening pitch anyone has ever seen,” you tell him. 

His forehead falls against yours with a sigh. 

“You’ll arrange for me to meet y/n before the game starts to say goodbye before she heads back to the company? After I’ve thrown the pitch?” he asks. The question directed at your manager. 

“We already have,” he says. 

Seungmin’s big brown boba eyes meet yours and they have softened from the start of the conversation. 

“Okay,” he says, resigned, his hands dancing along your thighs nervously like he still has more to say. “Can I have a minute with my fiancé?” he asks. It's not really a question. You realize that the car has parked in a garage at the stadium. You're in a corner away from prying eyes. With tinted windows, no one would know there was anyone in the car. “Alone,” he emphasizes with a small possessive growl. You can’t help the smirk that slips onto your face. 

Without any pushback, the manager and the driver get out of the car and walk a respectable distance away. 

Seungmin wastes no time pulling you onto his lap so that you are straddling him. You sigh longingly as his hands gently caress your face and pull your lips to his. This kiss is hungry, needy. His soft mouth is insistent as his tongue slips past your lips to taste you. His hands have wandered down your body and up under the back of your shirt, the pads of his fingers dancing along your back as he kisses you breathless. 

“Want to tell them,” he mumbles against your mouth, his breath heavy against your lips. “No more secrets,” he adds, kissing you hard again. 

You can’t help the moan that escapes your throat and the thrill that runs through your body at his words. Seungmin doesn’t want your relationship to be behind closed doors anymore. 

“You want everyone to know?” you ask when you're forced to pull away again, your breath coming in short, quick gasps. 

“Yes,” he answers simply, gazing into your eyes. “I can’t have another big moment like this where you can’t be right there with me,” he confesses. “You’re my everything, Y/N,” he looks at you with glassy boba eyes, the emotions he is feeling threatening to overflow. “I need you.” 

You hold his face in yours and stare into his eyes. 

“We’ll talk to Chan and our manager tonight about how to move forward,” you agree. “Surely they knew this was coming sooner rather than later. We’ve been engaged for nearly six months,” you chuckle softly. 

He smiles brightly at you then and you can’t help but return the gesture. He kisses you quick as you move to get off his lap. 

“Alright, my baseball player Kim Seungmin. You’ve got to get out of here and go show them how kick ass you are,” you tell him, kissing him on the cheek. 

He chuckles shyly, your favorite sound only second to his beautiful voice, as he moves to open the door, his shoulders shaking out his shirt like he does when he gets a little nervous. You love that you can still make him flustered even with a simple compliment.

He holds his hand out for you to grab, pulling you from the car and into his waiting arms where he kisses you once more. 

“One for good luck,” he smiles against your lips. 

“Not that you’ll need it,” you tell him, kissing him slowly. 

“Love you,” he whispers against your lips. 

“You better,” you smile up at him. “Cause I’m not going anywhere, Kim Seungmin.”

#stray kids #kim seungmin #seungmin #stray kids x reader #seungmin x reader #kim seungmin x reader #seungmin fluff #seungmin fanfiction #seungmin fanfic #seungmin one shot #seungmin drabble

[aspenwritesstuff]

hello aspen !! how are you doing?? i hope youre doing good! i just read your seungmin fic and started crying at the end it was so beautiful!! he is my bias and i dont feel like theres a lot of work with him :(( i wanted to ask will you be doing more seungmin?? i also wanted to ask if you would let me be🥚anon if you do that?? anyway i hope youre doing good and thank you for writing seungmin!!!

Hello! I'm doing okay right now, just a little worn out. Thanks for asking!

I'm so glad you enjoyed the Seungmin one-shot! I agree, I feel like he isn't represented as often in fanfiction. (At least not that I've seen.) I'll likely be doing more Seungmin in the future, although I do have the remainder of the members for REPLAY to write. Eventually I will give him some more love, though! Promise.

My first recurring anon? And it's an egg?! Of course, my dear egg! I hope you're well, also.

#anon: 🥚 #precious anon #stars and raindrops feedback #aspen answers #my first claimed anon! #seungmin fanfiction

[hyunsvngs]

𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐫𝐮𝐧 - baseball player bfb!kim seungmin x fem reader

wc: 14.2k

cw: enemies to lovers, very mean dom seungmin, mc makes out w chan in a friend way, mc is dramatic and a brat, seungmin is done w her shit but is very possessive, SMUT MDNI

synopsis: you love your best friend, you hate her baseball playing brother. he’s not been home for a few years during your summers back home, so you can’t wait for another amazing summer - until he returns home.

a/n: thank u all for being so excited abt this <3 sorry for the length. smut warnings under the cut!

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

sw: very mean dom seungmin (again), face slapping, borderline exhibitionism, unprotected sex, creampies, multiple orgasms, heavy dirty talk, reader is a brat, breeding kink, reader is a painslut, begging

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

When you were a mere three years old, you met your platonic soulmate in the form of Kim Sieun. She had the exact same humour as you, loved climbing on the monkey bars and she had a dog. It was your three best friend criterias fulfilled. When she first invited you to her house for a playdate, you were thrilled, and you’ve been inseparable ever since.

You’ve been through everything together. Your first break-ups, your first hangovers, first parties, you name it - you’ve both been present for each other’s momentous events. You were pretty sure you’d both started your periods on the exact same day. She really was the other part of you, the second silver heart piece to your cheap friendship chain you’ve worn for years around your neck. 

The biggest heartbreak was when you moved away to attend university, and Sieun stayed to begin a full-time job immediately after graduation. You’d been separated after being by each other's side for so long, when everything had been so perfect for you two up until then, only miniscule, small-term problems. 

Well, perfect apart from one thing. 

Her brother. Kim Seungmin was the bane of your existence. Ever since he met you, two years older than both you and Sieun, he found it funny to ruffle your hair and make fun of how shy and timid you were. It’s something you’d brush off now, being the person you grew into - confident, loud, straight up stubborn as some might say. When you were younger, though, this cut deep. You’d had your first ever crush on him, and confided in Sieun about the matter, to which she’d giggled and fake-gagged as if she wouldn’t be overjoyed to have you in the family. You’d had your first ever crush on him, and he’d made fun of you for years after as if he knew. You cannot stand him now. Even being in the same room as the guy boiled your blood. 

It was one of the reasons why you got rid of that personality. That wasn’t you. You were shy and timid because you were only a kid, God damn it! You’d love to say it hadn’t affected you, but it had, and you and Seungmin had bickered ever since you gained enough confidence to fight back. It was actually something Sieun found very amusing, insisting that the two of you were fated soulmates. 

Still, as you stood in the airport waiting for Sieun’s arrival to pick you up, you felt blessed. Coming home for the summer was always exciting. You got to see old friends, who would almost always have parties, and another exciting part was that you’d be staying with Sieun for a solid three weeks of it. It was going to be the best summer ever. Your parents had decided to go away on holiday two days before your arrival back home, and you couldn’t have felt more satisfied with the development.

Oh, and - Kim Seungmin would not be there. No, while you were a student busting your ass to make ends meet, Seungmin had obtained a full baseball scholarship to university and went straight into pro baseball once he’d finished. Of course he did. You tried not to let it bother you anymore, that he was so fucking successful while being so smarmy. It wound you up beyond belief, so you just avoided thinking about the guy altogether. 

Clutching onto your suitcase handle, you almost vibrated with excitement when Sieun’s half-dead car pulled up. Honestly, she’d had the same car since you were seventeen, and it hadn’t been fully working then. It was even worse after a few years. She kept saying she’d get her dad to look at it, but she was always out and about doing god knows what in said half broken car. It was a death trap.

Immediately, you saw the car door swing open - and almost fall off completely - when her engine completely stopped. Sieun bustled out of the car to the loading area of the airport, her puppy eyes wide and her legs shaking. She was going to scream, or jump, or die. Maybe all three. You weren’t doing much better - your eyes brimmed with tears when you embraced Sieun in a death grip of a hug. 

“I- missed- you- God, can’t breathe-“ Sieun grunted, trying to push you off. You pulled away, still with teary eyes as you gazed up at her. She was taller than you, almost matching her brother’s height. The whole family was relatively tall. As soon as you both looked at eachother, Sieun was gripping you in a firm hug again, and it was your turn to get suffocated. 

Once you’d eventually stopped hugging each other and crying - it had been approximately five months since you saw each other last - Sieun loaded your suitcase into the car and all but pushed you into the passenger seat. You groaned as you kicked through multiple McDonald’s cups to try and get your feet flat on the floor. Sieun simply giggled, settling into the driver’s seat. 

She plugged in her seatbelt, starting to drive back to her family home. “So, how’s college been? Any cute guys?”

“Sieun, I called you every week, you know what’s happened,” you laughed, playing around with the settings on her car to try and get the radio on. Did it even have a radio?

“The radio’s broken.” Of course it is. Well, it couldn’t get any worse - you’d already failed the Bechdel test. 

You leaned back against the seat, fingers playing with the friendship necklace chain. You hummed, trying to think of something Sieun may not know. “Well, there was this one guy. Super my type. Stoic, a little bit bitchy, you know? Dark hair, and all that. But when we ended up sleeping together, there was no chemistry.”

Sieun groaned in sympathy. “You know, I hate that! You really like a guy, and then he doesn’t even know where the clit is. It really pisses me off. How’s classes though?”

Sieun normally didn’t ask this many questions straight off the bat, especially not ones she knew the answers to. She was distracting you, sweetening you up by acting like she was just so interested in you. Something was fishy, and it wasn’t the strange smell of her car. When you turned to look at her, her plump lips were pouted as usual, covered in lip gloss - but there was an unmistakable twitch to them. Her eyes were narrowed, staring at the road ahead of her. She was hiding something.

You blinked. She started humming along to a song on the radio. There was no song on. Said radio was broken. “Sieun. What gives?”

Sieun sighed, slamming her hands down on the steering wheel. “Okay! I didn’t know how to tell you. I know this was meant to be our super amazing summer, face masks and beaches and just general slaying, so I didn’t want to ruin it.”

You realised you were arriving onto her street, the big house always taking you by surprise. You wanted to focus on Sieun’s words, but you were instead distracted by the driveway. Sieun’s parents shared a car, and Sieun had her own car. 

There were two cars in the driveway. Sieun’s parents’ car, a silver tank of a thing that looked like it could get through a boulder. Then, a sleeker car, perhaps closer to a sports car - much cleaner, much more expensive… with a personalised licence plate. No. No.

“My brother’s home.”

You wanted to die. Gone were your slay summer plans - now you’d be perpetually arguing with your best friend’s annoying older brother. He did absolutely everything deliberately to piss you off. Taking way too long in the bathroom brushing his teeth while you needed to pee, disconnecting the games controller when you were finally about to finish a boss fight… just petty activities like that. 

Why now? Why had he chosen this summer to come home, when he’d been away for every other summer playing baseball or whatever he does? No. He didn’t deserve to be back right now. You shook your head at Sieun. “I’m not going to let him ruin our awesome summer.” 

Sieun spluttered out a laugh. “Okay, Seungmin’s not the devil. You two bicker like an old married couple, y’know. Maybe there’s-“

“Shut. It.”

You didn’t have the time or the patience to hear yet another ten minute long spiel about how Sieun and her parents strongly believed that you and Seungmin were fated soulmates. The little patience you had completely disappeared when a figure bounded up to the car window. You turned to stare through the glass. 

Kim Seungmin. Stood there, beaming at you with that dumb smile that he always had when he was ready to wind you the fuck up. You had thanked every single god that your window was still rolled up, maybe you could just hide until he got bored and left - until Sieun rolled the window down with an evil chuckle. 

Then, you looked at him - like, really looked at him. The chubby cheeks he’d once possessed had disappeared with age, now sporting some nice looking cheekbones and a sharp jawline. The braces were gone, pearly white teeth showing with his smile, and his hair. God, his hair. He’d dyed the front of his hair blonde, and it was just slightly parted in the middle to show his forehead. He cocked his head at you, eyes glinting with menacing delight at your appearance. Oh no.

“Welcome back, brat.”

The bane of your existence had gotten fucking hot.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

It had just gotten worse. Once he’d pretended to have an ounce of chivalry by helping you take your suitcase inside, Seungmin had immediately reverted to the person he was the last time you saw him. Which was a while ago, by that point, since he’d always been too busy playing baseball games to make an appearance in your life for the past few years. You hadn’t really seen him since you went to university. It honestly made you feel relieved, but now you’d seen him - well, he was definitely better looking than he had been. That fact was only reinforced to you as you walked through their long hallway, taking in all the family pictures that had been up for so many years. You were even in a few of them, chubby cheeks and acne galore as you stood with your arm around Sieun. 

You’d stared at him all the way through dinner, in all honesty. After your second, adopted parents had greeted you and Sieun’s mother had cried upon seeing how much you’d grown - you hadn’t grown since you were thirteen, being on the shorter side of things - you’d all sat down to eat the hearty meal that she'd prepared. Seungmin sat in front of you in his assigned place, something you previously would’ve hated, but you could at least analyse him.

Yeah, something had changed. He was aesthetically pleasing, but you hadn’t forgotten his fucking behaviour. He was a menace. You shoved another forkful of the homemade lasagne in your mouth, furrowing your eyebrows at the boy sitting in front of you. 

His eyes flickered to look at you, but you didn’t even think about looking away. His eyes were so dark. Stoic, almost, and he was like… okay, yeah, he looked like your ex-fling from college. That’s weird. It didn’t even stop you maybe bordering on finding Seungmin attractive, as much as it put you off of your lasagne to even think of the concept.

“Can you stop fucking staring at me?” Seungmin hissed, his fork clattering down to the plate with an eye watering noise. You huffed, reaching forward to stab him with your knife before Sieun yanked your hand back. 

“Who said I was staring at you? I’m eating my fucking food, you heathen, and everytime I look up your ugly face is right in front of me-”

“Oh, I missed this!” Sieun’s mother smiled, her eyes fond. “Let me just get a camera, and I can take a picture of you three.”

Later on, in Sieun’s room, you both sat with your legs laid up against the headboard and sheet masks on your face. The anger was still burning in your stomach, but you were trying not to let everything revolve around him, like it always did. 

“So, we’re going to watch Seungmin’s baseball game tomorrow. Mum and dad are super excited about it,” Sieun said, painting your nails where your hand laid on her stomach. You groaned, feet kicking against the wall with small thuds. Sieun’s hand paused with the tiny paint brush, turning to look at you through narrowed eyes. “You don’t think he… looks different? Everyone’s been saying that since he came home.”

“Looks different?” You snickered. “Still looks pretty fucking weird to me. Seriously, how are the two of you even related? You’re pretty, nice, funny, and he’s so fucking- ugh! I can’t even explain it, and he-”

Sieun snorted. “You think he’s hot.”

You gasped, pulling your hand away. The nail polish smeared all over your finger, which was decidedly the one you used to point menacingly towards your lifelong best friend. “I do not! He’s gotten taller, yeah. The hair’s… different, but that’s the only thing that’s changed. He’s still fucking annoying, even after getting his braces off, and-”

“And you’ve noticed all these things about him,” Sieun sighed, leaning up and readjusting her whole body to sit cross legged, facing you. She put the paintbrush back in the nail polish bottle. The sheet mask made her look a lot less friendly than she was trying to be. The Sheet Mask Murderer could be a good horror film, you pondered, as she stared at you. “Bestie, I’m not going to be upset if you have a crush on my brother, you know? I know he’s grown up in the past year, and so have you. Things could be different now, and… you could be part of the family, officially, I guess.”

You screwed up your face, shock painting your expression. The sheet mask got caught in the lines of your forehead. “You’re deranged, Sieun. You know that, right? Like, you’ve actually lost the plot this time.”

Sieun sighed, fingers reaching to peel the sheet mask off of her face. “I have always been deranged.”

“Well, yeah, there is that.”

She flopped back down next to you, dark hair splaying around her head like a halo. “We will still have the best summer. I promise you.”

“Okay, my conditions are that we have to go to a lot of cool parties, get amazingly drunk and maybe fuck one or two people. Deal?”

“Um, duh? Deal.”

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

You’d dreaded the baseball game all day. For starters, you were going to see baseball, something you had absolutely no clue about. Secondly, it was your literal enemy’s baseball game. It was also one of his pro games, and was taking place at a massive stadium where just about everyone seemed to know who Seungmin was and who his family was. You’d already had to witness Sieun posing with a peace sign for multiple selfies with fans once you’d all found your seats, and Sieun’s mother had already put an arm around you to show you exactly where Seungmin would be once the game started.

“He’ll be over there,” She pointed to a part of the field. You didn’t really care. You had no clue what baseball was or any of its rules - just that there were bats and they hit balls and ran. You decided that was all you needed to know. You weren’t going to do any research for it, not if it was him playing. 

You and Sieun had dressed up, too, because Sieun had thankfully found a beach party for you all to go to later. ‘All’ sadly included Seungmin and his gaggle of just as annoying friends. The only one you really got on with was Chan, who was mature and seemed to be ageing ten times quicker due to the stress the rest of the group caused him. You both kissed when you were drunk and had agreed you were just friends who liked to kiss, which was optimal for you, really. You had decided that you would dress up nicely in a borderline slutty white dress and sandals for the party, and you had makeup on. It was most definitely for the party, and not for any other reason.

When the game started, you thought you were going to have a heart attack and die. While Sieun and her family were cheering out Seungmin’s name, all you saw was that ass in tight, pinstripe trousers. He was grinning, waving over to your section - definitely not at you, he hated you and you were literally looking at him with the most shocked expression in that moment. He looked good. You decided it was okay to admit that mentally, because no one was ever going to hear you say it. His ass looked peachy and you wanted to bite into it like it was one, and maybe see what the front of his body looked like - all of it.

It all looked good, at least when he was wearing clothes. Broad shoulders pulled that jersey tight around them, and his hat was pulled low to almost obscure his dark eyes. When he rolled his neck, clicking it out with one broad hand before grabbing the ball, you knew your panties were wet. Soaking, actually, because he looked so broad and so tall and so fucking powerful on that pitch. You’d always had a thing for men who looked like they could fuck you like you were beneath them. The fleeting thought that Seungmin would definitely do just that caused your cheeks to blaze.

Obviously, his team won. Obviously he did, because then you had to stand there afterwards when his whole family hugged him and you just stood there kicking pebbles before wincing that it hurt your bare toes. Fuck sandals. Fuck Seungmin. 

Once he’d hugged Sieun, he turned to you, cheeks slightly pink from the exertion of the sport. You briefly thought about how baseball wasn’t even that tiring. One stripe of black paint on his cheek caught your eye when you looked at him. When Sieun elbowed your side, you looked up, arms folded across your chest. Seungmin blinked at you, hands in his pockets with a cocky smirk. You knew what he was waiting for. 

Mumbling, you spoke - “Congrats.”

“Say it properly, brat.”

“Fuck you, I don’t say what you want me to say!” You kicked a pebble at him successfully, smiling in accomplishment when it bounced off of his knee. He simply scowled, repeating what you said in a meh bleh, bleh bleh type of way. When you let your arms drop from your chest to strangle him to the floor Bart and Homer style, Sieun gripped you by the back of your bodycon dress and dragged you back to stand next to her. 

“Go get changed for the party, Seungie,” She said, keeping you in her hand like you were a rabid dog on a leash. “And you. You can’t just try to strangle my brother-”

“How did you even know I was going to strangle him?”

“Because, it’s not the first time!” Sieun shouted, stomping her feet like a child. She finally stopped holding onto you, huffing as she turned to look at you fully. Seungmin’s parents had left to get to the car, insisting on giving you all a lift to the beach where the party was held. Your parents would never. You’d lost count of how many times you had blisters from walking back from somewhere five miles away because your mother was engrossed in another show on television. Seungmin raised an eyebrow at the both of you. 

“I’m gonna go get changed.” He finally spoke, waving towards the direction of the locker room. You grimaced.

“Okay, and? I don’t care,” When you watched Seungmin walk away, eyes unable to tear away from that tight ass in those trousers, you could practically feel Sieun’s own eyes boring into your face. Finally turning to look at her, you saw a slight smile on her lips. “Don’t.”

“I didn’t say anything, bestie.”

You stormed off to the car, in a foul mood now that you’d been caught by Sieun ogling her own brother. Just to make matters worse, you had been designated to shimmy into the middle seat of the back because you were the smallest, so you’d be sat in between the two siblings. Brilliant. Just ideal, really. Thankfully, Sieun’s parents had already put the air con on. The heat of the summer had been killing you in that packed baseball stadium. 

“So, what did you think of Seungmin?” Sieun’s dad asked you. He looked a lot like Seungmin actually, just an aged version with salt and pepper hair. You smiled politely, about to respond before Sieun cut you off.

“Dad, don’t. She’s already wound up.” You wanted to kiss Sieun. You could not discuss what had just happened, including the game. You’d spent the whole time drooling over the bane of your existence. When Seungmin finally got to the car, you side eyed him in order to see what he was wearing, and were more than pleased to see he was in a light grey t-shirt and baggy blue jeans. Good. Nothing tight. 

The beach party was packed when you arrived there. A lot of sweaty young adults smoking weed, drinking and perched around a campfire or dancing near the portable speaker playing music quietly. All you could think about was how much you deserve a drink after the day’s events, and you were quick to drag Sieun over to Chan when you spotted him. Dark curly hair hidden under a hat and a sleeveless black tank top. Unmistakably Chan, and also unmistakably someone who would donate alcohol to a good cause. 

He immediately looked up at you, his smile wide with dimples adorning his cheeks. You saw Seungmin flop down next to some other friends he had from the corner of your eye. Chan caught your attention though, handing you and Sieun a beer each. “Hello, you. Welcome back to the town.” 

“Channie!” You squealed, taking the beer from him and wrapping your arms around his neck. He subsequently pulled you onto his lap and Sieun giggled, sitting in the sand next to him. You’d always been close with Chan, and you wouldn’t be lying if you said you found him attractive. Those arms showing in the sleeveless top were definitely doing something for you that night, but you weren’t sure if it was the pent up aggression from earlier. You immediately pressed the beer to your lips at the thought, swigging down a lot of the liquid. 

Then, it just felt like the drinks kept coming. Over and over you were drinking beers that were handed to you by either Chan or Changbin, one of the others you were friendly with, and you found yourself becoming tipsy and slouching on Chan’s lap. The fire burned your eyes a bit when you stared into it, but you were still giggling, leaning your head back on Chan’s shoulder.

Seungmin glowered, turning to Sieun and speaking almost inaudibly. “Stop her drinking. She’s making a fool of herself, all over Chan like that.”

“They’re friends, you idiot. She’s not even drunk, they’re just always like that!” You didn’t have time to thank Sieun for defending you immediately against her own brother because Hyunjin was coming over to you with two small plastic shot glasses. One sniff of the liquid proved it was vodka, a fact you weren’t surprised about - Hyunjin loved to get utterly white-girl-wasted at any party. His smile was wide and eyes half-lidded already when he looked at you. 

“This is for you,” Hyunjin whispered. His fringe almost obscured his face as he handed a shot glass to you, and offered the other to Chan. Chan held out his hand, pushing it softly back to Hyunjin. Hyunjin literally just shrugged his shoulders, toasting your own shot before knocking his own back. He didn’t even make a face when taking shots, which was probably the fact about Hyunjin you were most jealous of - along with his ethereal beauty, obviously. You grimaced when the liquid hit your own taste buds, glugging it back thankfully. You couldn’t gag on Chan right now. 

The music filled your ears as the sun began to set. Someone had turned the speaker up just a bit louder, and Jisung had started to dance and embarrass himself. It was the usual behaviour. You saw Changbin chatting to some girls you and Sieun had gone to school with, and Sieun got up to go and join, leaving Seungmin chatting with the other boys on the other side of the bonfire. You sat quite happily on Chan’s lap, listening to him telling a story from work.

“I mean, it was insane. Hannie quite literally wrote this entire song in like, five minutes. We were all super drunk. I have no idea how he did it,” Chan said, hands flying everywhere in his story. You blinked at him for a moment, processing who Hannie was. Ah. Han Jisung. Hannie. The round-cheeked boy was still twerking across from you. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, ‘m just a bit tipsy now,” You giggled, nuzzling into his cheek. Chan laughed at your level of clinginess, hand placed on your hip comfortingly. “Sorry, Channie.”

“That’s okay. Hey, remember a few years ago? You always wanted kisses from me and Changbin when you were drunk, heh,” Chan looked at you, eyes fond. When you finally looked into his eyes, it was like your brain caught up with what he was saying. Kisses? God, that’d be so good.

“Kisses. Oh my God,” You whispered, eyes wide. Chan threw his head back, hand over his face while he laughed this time. “Channie.”

Chan sighed, finally looking at you. “Yes? What is it?” He knew what it was. You surged forward, pressing a familiar friendly kiss to his plump lips. He raised his eyebrows in shock, pulling you back by his grip on your hips.

“I cannot kiss you right now. Seungmin is there, and he is looking at us.”

“Who cares about that guy? He’s an ass,” You mumbled, pressing your lips to Chan again. Chan sighed into the kiss, finally giving up and letting his lips brush against yours. You loved kissing Chan. It was always so fun, so familiar, just two friends making out when drunk. It was one of your favourite pastimes, to be honest. You were just getting into the kiss when you felt hands on your waist, scooping you up and throwing you over one broad shoulder. You heard Chan laugh while you were disoriented, trying to work out whose shoulder you were even on and why are you walking away from the beach party?! You were having so much fun! 

“What is goin’ on?!” You shrieked, legs flailing around. You were slurring at this point, and you even heard Sieun giggling over the music. Finally, you heard a sigh as the feet of the body you had been stolen by started to wade through the sand and onto the street.

“We are going home. That’s what’s fucking going on,” Seungmin. You grimaced, wriggling to try and get off of his shoulder, but the grip he had on your body was unbelievable. “Why the hell were you doing that?”

“Doing what? Kissing Chan? I always kiss Chan.”

“I don’t want you to do that anymore, okay?” You huffed at his words, resorting to slamming your fists on his back as he walked quickly down the street. He didn’t even flinch. “Are you listening to me, brat? I don’t want you doing that.”

“You are not my fucking dad, Kim Seungmin. You don’t decide who I kiss!” You sounded like a petulant child, whining and squirming around to be put down on your feet. Finally, Seungmin grabbed your hips with both hands, placing you down on the floor. Cars were speeding past you as you both stood on the pavement. You crossed your arms over your chest, vision slightly blurry from the intoxication and body covered in sand. Seungmin didn’t look to be doing any better, beige specks of sand in his dark hair and his grey t-shirt completely covered. He shoved his hands in his pockets, tilting his head when looking at you.

“I may not decide who you kiss, but I’m gonna be mad if you do that again. Got it?” Seungmin was stoic, sharp as he spoke in a monotone voice towards you. You furrowed your eyebrows. What? Why did it matter? “He’s my friend.”

“Okay, and? I don’t care.” You repeated your words from earlier. Seungmin huffed, blowing a strand of blonde hair from his forehead. You looked at him. He looked at you. Then, he was turning around, walking down the road in the direction towards his house. You gasped, appalled that he’d leave you there on the side of the road like some kind of bag of trash. 

After a few long strides, you heard him groan faintly in the distance. He stopped dead still, turning around to you with a grimace. “Are you coming, or?”

You stood your ground. “Nope.”

“Fine, stay there and be killed by a raccoon or something, fucking brat. Or worse, an actual murderer. Wouldn’t that be scary? A murderer just killing you while you’re standing there in your sandals. Can’t even protect yourself, can’t throw your shoe at him like you do with me because what harm will sandals do-” Seungmin stopped talking when you ran at him, eyes wide as you wrapped your arm around his own. He huffed, trying to shake your arm off of his, but you held on tightly. Your bottom lip quivered. You were such a baby when it came to scary things like raccoons and murderers. 

“‘M scared now, Seungmin.” You whispered, leaning your head on his arm. You could practically sense Seungmin rolling his eyes as he wrapped his arm around you, holding you close to his warm body. 

“Only five minutes now. Five minutes and we’ll be home, okay?” You nodded, trying to keep up with the strides of his long legs. 

In bed that night, laying in Sieun’s bed sans Sieun, you couldn’t help but wonder just what the fuck that was. Seungmin was almost nice for a moment. Sure, he’d had that weird freak out about you kissing Chan - that was strange - but then he’d not left you on the side of the road. A few years ago, he would have left you on the pavement and then proceeded to go get a car to run you over on said pavement. He had changed.

Kim Seungmin was hot. You’ll admit that, unfortunately. But now Kim Seungmin was hot and he had morals, too. 

That one would be hard to process.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

The next morning, you were woken up by Sieun’s arm across your forehead and her soft snores in your ear. You briefly felt extremely guilty for making sure she hadn’t gotten home safe, but judging by her still sleeping, she’d left after you’d fallen asleep. You wanted to wake her, to ask her what the fuck her brother’s deal was, but you settled on heading downstairs to get some breakfast and calm your stomach. It felt like a bomb had gone off in there. 

You started to make your way downstairs to get breakfast, but you walked straight into Seungmin’s chest as soon as you left Sieun’s bedroom. He stood with a mug of coffee in his hands, blinking down at you like you were, in fact, a bomb that had just gone off in front of him. 

You stared up at him, eyes wide. He furrowed his eyebrows. “Move, brat.”

Oh. So he was just going to forget him being borderline nice ever happened? What a fucking- ugh! You scoffed, looking down at the coffee. 

“You know this isn’t your room right, dumbass? Take your coffee into your own room.” Seungmin rolled his eyes, barging past you to stand by the door.

“It’s for my sister, dumbass.” You wanted to ask where’s mine, then, but Seungmin would only laugh at you and move on with his life. It annoyed you beyond belief that Seungmin had actually been nice to you the night before and then continued to act like absolutely nothing happened. You wanted to positively kick him across the face like the Mortal Kombat games he used to unplug your controller on.

Still, you had hope for the summer. Two straight days of hell would not change your mind. You just had to get through today, a chill, relaxing day with Sieun where you both nursed slight hangovers and probably cried over making mistakes the night before. Then there was hope for some fun tomorrow. 

Tomorrow was the annual camping trip with your friend group. It only went on for one night, in the woods close to your actual home a few streets away, but it was something everyone looked forward to. Unfortunately, given that your friend group was also Seungmin’s friend group, and that he was back now, it meant he would be there. This was unlike the annual camping trips before, and you were dreading his presence. You just had to avoid him, and he wouldn’t stop you kissing your friends. He wouldn’t stop you having fun if you just acted like he wasn’t there. The thought made your blood boil. 

You hid in the bathroom until you heard Seungmin’s footsteps recede back into his bedroom, and then you emerged. Fuck breakfast. You needed a good heart-to-heart with your best friend. Stomping back into the bedroom, you were met with Sieun’s eyes still only half open, just about emerging from above the mug.

“Oh, hey,” Sieun mumbled. She blew the hot liquid in the cup and then took a sip, humming with satisfaction. You stood there, arms crossed across your chest and foot tapping with annoyance. Sieun looked at you. You looked at her, a frown on your lips. She sighed. “What’s he done now?”

“Well, what the fuck was last night, Sieun?!” You exclaimed, throwing your body down on the bed. Sieun snorted, sounding like she was holding back a laugh. “Sieun, he picked me up and took me from a party. What was that? And, and! On the way home, he was kind of being… nice?! Then, just now, this morning, he was being absolutely horrible again!”

“And this annoys you because…? You’re always horrible to each other, sweetie.”

“Yes, I’m aware,” You huffed, turning over to scream into a pink heart pillow on Sieun’s bed. “He’s coming tomorrow, too. Like, as if it could get any worse!”

Sieun hummed. You heard the mug clink onto the bedside table, probably to live next to another ten mugs for about three weeks. “I’ll make sure he’s on his best behaviour.”

You grumbled into the fabric. Then, as if you’d completely forgotten about it, a blurred memory came into your head. I don’t want you doing that anymore. He’d said that in confidence, stood there in front of you, all long legs and pouty lips forming the words. “He… he said he didn’t want me kissing Chan anymore.”

Sieun spluttered. “He- he what?! Why would he say that?”

You shrugged. “D’no. Weird though. It… it made me feel weird. Like, almost shy. I don’t know.”

“That’s because you have a big old crush on my brother. We’ll address that later, though, because it seems my brother may have a big old crush on you,” You lifted your head, blinking at her. The drink had gone to her head last night. She was now clinically insane, beyond deranged by the sounds of it. Her eyes were peering out of the window opposite her bed in deep contemplation. “I mean, it makes sense. You two do bicker like an old married couple, but maybe that’s your shtick.” 

“I do not have a big old crush on your brother. He does not have a big old crush on me. We are mortal enemies.”

“Mmhm, okay, honey. We’ll see what happens tomorrow, yeah?”

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

You didn’t sleep a wink the night before the camping trip. Of course you didn’t. Your thoughts were riddled with stupid remarks and baseball uniforms and long legs looking amazing in said baseball uniforms. Eventually, you’d actually cried a bit, just wanting him to leave your mind. Then, you felt pathetic crying over a man. That disgusted you beyond belief.

It had you thinking that Sieun may have been onto something. Maybe you did have a stupid crush on her brother. Maybe it had never left, ever since you’d caught sight of his chubby cheeks and mop of dark hair when you were both little. You’d have to just overcome it. Arguing with him would probably help, and you did that everyday, so it’d be fine. Manageable, at least, so long as he kept his goddamn nose out of your business. You’d had stupid crushes on people before, and you knew this one could leave very easily and very quickly.

Unfortunately, due to the lack of sleep, you had been forced to smother your eye bags in concealer that was maybe a shade too light. Seungmin had commented on this when you and his sister loaded your stuff into his pristine car, grimacing at the sight of you.

“You look like a ghost, brat.” You had immediately tried to rub the concealer off with your fingers, and now it was just a smeared mess on your otherwise decent skin. Fuck that guy. Fuck Kim Seungmin. Fuck yourself, too, because why were you trying to adhere to what he said?

It had still been plaguing your mind when you laid next to the lake in the woods while everyone drank around you. You had taken your premixed cocktail in a can to the lake not too far from the lake, and were perched in your blue bikini trying to get somewhat of a tan. Your skin was only blazing with anger, not sun. All of a sudden, you heard some branches snapping, and opening your eyes served you with the face of your best friend.

“Truth or dare. C’mon, everyone’s playing.”

You were lugged back to the campsite, groaning with your can still in your hand. Chan perked up immediately at the sight of you, patting his lap in invitation. 

You went to walk over, smiling at his dimpled cheeks, but quickly turned to Seungmin. “Sorry, Channie, I should probably check if I’m allowed first.”

Everyone erupted in roars, even Chan, who dragged you by your waist onto his lap while still giggling. Seungmin practically glowered, eyes staring you down with the anger within him. 

“Let's start with you then, brat,” Seungmin said, motioning towards you with the hand wrapped around the neck of his beer. “Truth or dare?”

You pretended to think. You always chose the same thing. “Truth.”

“Boring!” Sieun screamed, her pink bikini strap slipping down her shoulder. Changbin used two fingers to push it back up into place. Always a gentleman. “Okay, what is the biggest lie you’ve ever told?”

Seungmin turned to Sieun, displeasure written all over his features. “It’s literally meant to be me asking the question.”

“I don’t care.” Sieun shrugged. She also knew what the biggest lie you’ve ever told is, judging by the smirk on her face when she turned back towards you.

You smacked your lips together. Okay. If he had a crush on you, it would be instantly severed in that moment, because you were about to wholeheartedly tell the truth. “Seungmin, I was the one who broke your PS4. I spilled coffee over it.”

“What?! You fucking brat!” Everyone screamed again, Chan howling with laughter at Seungmin’s exasperation. “Tell me that you aren’t serious. You told me that-“

“I told you that the dog peed on it?” You giggled. Seungmin nodded, eyebrows furrowed. “Yeah, no. It stank of coffee, so you’re kinda dumb for believing me in the first place.”

Seungmin huffed. His cheeks were red, breathing heavy. Oh, he was so mad. Good. You lived your life specifically to piss Kim Seungmin off.

“Okay, Seungmin. Truth or dare?” Changbin spoke up. He didn’t need to speak up, because his voice was like a foghorn already. Seungmin sighed again, turning to the shorter male. 

“Dare.”

“I dare you to kiss Dahyun.” You turned to the girl in question. She was quite quiet, only speaking when spoken to, but you and Sieun had been friendly enough with her back in high school. She’d been close with Chan, though, and had kind of stuck with the group since. You thought she didn’t even like Seungmin either, but the way she perked up at the statement said otherwise. 

Seungmin, however, was still looking very pissed off. He put his beer bottle on the floor, sighing as he made his way over to Dahyun. You heard Jisung giggling, making lewd comments and noises in Minho’s ear, who just pushed him off with a sigh of fondness. All of a sudden, Seungmin’s lips were pressed to hers. You could see everything. Tongue and spit swapped between the two, and you found yourself turning to look at your drink instead. Awkward.

It made you feel awkward. More than that, though, it kind of made you feel weird. You weren’t sure of the emotion exactly, but you knew you wanted to leave instantly and never see Seungmin or Dahyun ever again. You also wanted to scream. Especially when you finally let yourself look up, when the cheers receded to murmurs and Seungmin had pulled away from Dahyun, looking straight at you. 

You locked eyes with him, blinking. Then, you saw fucking red.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You blurted, seeing Seungmin’s eyes widen at your outburst. Dahyun’s eyebrows raised, looking at you with fear. You turned to her with a timid smile. “Not you. Him. The bastard you kissed seems to think he can tell me what I can do, who I can kiss, yet he seems to be doing whatever he wants? Is this a joke, Kim Seungmin?”

Sieun laughed awkwardly from her position next to Changbin, rising up onto her feet. “Okay, perhaps this doesn’t need to happen right now-“

“No, let the brat speak to me how she wants. It’s not going to fucking end well, and she knows it,” Seungmin spoke, throwing his beer bottle down on the floor exasperatedly. He stood up, light blue baggy jeans looking slightly brown with the mud and an oversized jersey falling off of broad shoulders. You took in his appearance with nothing but an angered expression, cheeks burning with rage when you realised he still looked really fucking good with his hair dyed like that. Something about him shouting at you was turning you on, too, but you decided to address that at a later date. “I told you not to kiss Chan for a good reason.”

You scoffed. You could practically hear Chan’s hair turning to grey from stress behind you. “Oh, yeah? What reason is that? He’s my friend.”

“You should- you should only kiss people you like. People you’re interested in,” Seungmin was shouting now, finger pointing at you determinedly. You rolled your eyes, making him stomp his foot in the mud. 

“I guess that means that you like Dahyun then, huh?” You said, remembering to give Dahyun another smile. This really wasn’t against her. She was sweet, and she hadn’t done anything wrong. Kim Seungmin just grinds your fucking gears. 

You realised way too late that maybe you didn’t want to know the answer to the question that you’d so loudly shouted. 

Seungmin ran his hand through his hair, licking his lips. You tried to avoid staring at his mouth when he eventually retorted. “Maybe I do, brat. What’s it to you?” 

You blanched. It was nothing. It was nothing to you, really, but you definitely couldn’t back down now, even if you could sense the rest of your friendship group feeling slightly awkward in the wake of tension. You folded your arms over your chest, staring Seungmin down while you searched your brain earnestly for something that would hurt. 

“It’s nothing to me. I don’t give a fuck about you, Seungmin.”

Seungmin looked like he’d stopped breathing, staring at you with intensity in his eyes. You couldn’t quite work out what emotion they held, but you had a feeling that you may have gone a bit further than your normal bickering. It was only a matter of time, really, with you having a very short temper and all. 

As if it had never even happened, Seungmin rolled his neck and shrugged. He sat back down on the floor with a flurry of movement and with another shift, his arm was around Dahyun and he was pulling her close. She looked like she wanted to run very far away, but then Seungmin was handing her another beer and it was apparently fine. 

Changbin cleared his throat. “Okay, shall we continue?”

The rest of the night went with seemingly no hitches. Everyone drank, sang, danced, and the tents were slowly filling up with people retiring from the night, their skin still dewy with the water from the lake close by. You even managed to avoid getting riled up by the bastard sitting opposite you, so that was an achievement in itself. Eventually, you retired to the tent you, Sieun and Chan had been designated, limbs stiff from sitting down for so long.

Wiggling into your sleeping bag, you zipped up the fabric with your whole body inside like a cocoon. You could hear mumbling and giggles from the next tent over, but choosing to ignore it, you shifted over to face Chan. He was still awake, scrolling through his phone. You weren’t sure the guy ever fucking slept, in all honesty. Sieun snored behind you steadily, the sound of cicadas breaking up the noise of her heavy slumber. 

Chan blinked up at you, locking his phone when he saw you were still awake. The moonlight just about seeped through the walls of your temporary home for the night and you could see his features, sharp as always. He grinned at you, pulling you closer by your sleeping bag. “So.” 

“So,” you agreed, nuzzling into his bare shoulder. The summer heat was still present in the night, although mild, and he’d clearly chosen to not overheat with his chest bare. “This whole night was really weird, Channie. My life is really weird right now.”

“Tell me about it,” Chan hummed, fingers scratching on your scalp soothingly. “How long?”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. Chan simply looked at you earnestly, his lips in a tight smile. “How long… what?”

“How long since you’ve liked him?” Chan whispered, clearly registering the noise from the next tent over. You blanched, before realising that well - you could lie to Kim Sieun, Kim Seungmin and yourself, but you couldn’t lie to Bang Chan. He was too kind, too dear to you in a different sense to what Sieun was. 

“I dunno what it is, but I’m ignoring it,” you responded, even quieter than his whisper. “It’s weird. Makes me feel weird.”

Chan let out a silent laugh, chest shaking next to you. “Crushes tend to do that, babe. They make you feel all weird and fuzzy.”

“Kim Seungmin does not make me feel weird and fuzzy, Channie. I can’t stand him.”

“You can’t stand him because he makes you feel weird and fuzzy, and maybe it’s about time you realised that.”

You huffed, turning over to press your back against his chest, despite being separated by sleeping bags and extra fabric. Chan shuffled closer, pulling you in for a cuddle nonetheless. He pressed a kiss to the back of your head, murmuring, “you can’t avoid him. I know you want to, but you can’t. He’s your best friend’s brother.”

Unfortunately, this was something you had already recognised. Staring at Sieun’s sleeping figure reminded you that yeah, he was your best friend’s brother, and while a relationship between you and him would never fuck anything up… well, an unrequited crush might. It would be too awkward. That’s why you swore you were going to ignore him. 

You had to go back to hating Kim Seungmin.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Fortunately, it was a lot easier than you’d anticipated. You’d managed to avoid him in his own home. You didn’t even see him in the hallways, sticking to showers late at night while he was always showering in the early morning, and you and Sieun had been eating out nearly every day to avoid family dinners. It almost felt rude, but with Seungmin, being rude was not possible. He was the epitome of rude.

Rude, brazen, and with zero morals. You’d almost forgotten that in the haze of him being nice once and looking pretty all the time. Sure, he was aesthetically pleasing, and maybe he was exactly your type. But you were never going to forget the history between you ever again, not if you put your mind to it. 

However, the concept of your own morals slipping to actually possibly like Seungmin had ruined your days since. You just couldn’t believe yourself! That’s Seungmin you were very nearly lusting over. Your mortal enemy, the bane of your existence. Who cared if he’d gotten hot?

Apparently, you did. As you stood in a party with Sieun dancing around carelessly, you were clutching your drink tight and thinking of your enemy. The drink limited your inhibitions, making you able to think more freely. Why did he look at you like that after kissing Dahyun? Why did he stop you kissing Chan? Why did- 

“Why are you still overthinking? We’re at a party!” Sieun hollered, the drink in her cup threatening to slosh over the edges with her dancing. You shook your head, putting on your best fake smile.

“I am having the bestest time,” You insisted, smiling and starting to do a little jig to the music. The house party, held at Changbin’s literal mansion, was slowly filling up. You and Sieun had retired to the kitchen to down a few drinks so that you felt less awkward and could start going feral with the rest of the party, but the more drinks you had, the more you got inside of your own head. This wasn’t like you. You were the party girl, the girl who everyone had awaited return to the town - you wanted to scream and stomp your feet like a child. 

“You’re totally not, honey,” Sieun mumbled, seeing the look in your eyes. You sighed, downing back the concoction in your cup. You’d worn another slutty dress to the party, done your makeup and hair and now it was all going to waste. “Are you sure you don’t wanna head back?”

You shrugged. “I mean, if you want to, we can.”

Sieun’s eyes widened. “Well, I was just- I was gonna call you an Uber, and get you home. I’m gonna stay, y’know, it’s Changbin’s house, and… yeah.”

And she wanted to make out with Changbin. She was so valid for that. You sighed again, looking around at the kitchen. The party was a bit too much for you right now in your utterly discombobulated headspace. Maybe you should go back, just chill for the night, sleep. It was probably for the best, or you’d ruin Sieun’s night too by being so awkward. 

“Ah. Yeah, okay, maybe it’s best if I go home,” You looked at Sieun, who was beginning to eye up Changbin. He was in a pretty intense game of beer pong with Jisung, and both parties were screaming their heads off. You didn’t want to stand between Sieun and her destiny, her fate. Sieun turned back to you, a glint in her eye. “Alright, would you call me an Uber? But um, maybe I should go to my house. Y’know, since-“

“He’s at practice,” She said, shaking her head. “Not home. Don’t worry, he won’t be home for a little while.”

You frowned, checking the time. It was 9pm. Did practice go on this late? You let yourself accept her statement anyway. You still had no clue what happened in baseball, or what happened in baseball practice nonetheless. It could go on until 3am for all you knew. Sieun pressed a few buttons on her cracked phone before she was grinning, sending you a thumbs up.

“All done. He- the driver, he’ll be here in five. Good?” You nodded, giving her a quick hug. “You need me to wait outside with you?”

“No, no,” You shook your head. You couldn’t ruin her night even more through your petty questioning of why, why, why. After giving Sieun a quick kiss on the cheek, you made sure she went straight over to Changbin and was safe before you left the house. It took you a solid five minutes to even try to wade through the bodies and you were thankful you were leaving -  you really didn’t have the headspace for that.

Standing outside, you rubbed your hands over your arms to try and gain some warmth. You’d never been great with cold, and although the summer nights weren’t as biting on your skin, it was still unpleasant when you didn’t have the body of a friend next to you. It was also your fault for wearing a strapless minidress that was about two seconds from falling down or riding up, or both. 

The car really only took five minutes. You were thankful for this, as Ubers were inherently unreliable and it was getting colder, and way too loud in the house behind you. Scurrying down the front steps, you didn’t look at the car until you were about a foot in front of it, looking up at the vehicle. 

The car was very familiar. You weren’t sure if the few drinks you’d consumed had made your eyesight go funny, but… no, that definitely was Sieun’s car. You could see inside the car, a lot cleaner than when she picked you up from the airport but still looking half broken. And… Oh God. She’d really done you dirty this time.

Seungmin was sitting in the driver’s seat, and he rolled the window down upon your arrival. “Are you getting in?” 

“No.” You blurted, arms crossed over your chest. “Why are you driving Sieun’s car?”

“Mine’s in for a service,” He responded, eyes racking over your figure. “You look freezing, brat. Get in.”

“No.”

“I’m not going to have to get out and grab you, am I?” He said, eyes narrowing at you. You blanched. He was kinda scary tonight. With a sigh, you made haste to the other side of the car, and heard him mumble “thought not”.

You buckled up your seatbelt when in the passenger seat, and tried to reach over to fiddle with the aircon. The car was cold, too, and you found yourself even more on edge now that you were sitting with Seungmin in a confined area. 

Fiddling with the aircon, you felt Seungmin bat your hand away. “It’s broken.” You turned to look at him, completely silent, and then you saw it. He was in his baseball uniform. Tight pinstripe trousers on those long legs and a loose jersey on his upper body, hair almost flattened from his hat. It still looked good, blonde streaks breaking up the dark mop of hair on his unfairly pretty face. 

“Hello?” He waved a hand over your face. “Are you deaf now, brat? It’s broken.”

“Yeah, sorry,” You mumbled, turning to face out the window. You sensed Seungmin tensing, before he sighed and started the engine to the car. The car started to speed away from Changbin’s house before you even recognised it, too holed up in your head. 

Seungmin sighed again when you were still silent, no noise circulating the small space of the car. “What’s wrong with you lately?”

You turned to him, blinking. “Huh?”

“I’m asking what’s wrong with you lately. I’ve barely seen you. You haven’t been bickering at me, haven’t tried to physically fight me lately. What’s going on?”

You screwed your face up in confusion. “You don’t even care, Seungmin, so why are you asking?”

“Of course I care,” Seungmin’s eyebrows furrowed. He was staring at the road, not looking at you even as your eyes raked over his body unashamedly. “I don’t completely hate you, brat. You just piss me off a lot of the time. So, what’s wrong?”

Gazing at the bulge in his trousers, you realised you needed to stop being so thirsty and reply. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Why did you say that? Why was that the thing that came out of your mouth?

“Funny, because you seem to always want to talk,” Seungmin snickered, one hand tight on the steering wheel. His other arm rested on the armrest, looking the epitome of comfort and relaxation while you felt like you were dying. His remark made you burn with anger. How dare he? You don’t even talk that much, really. “I mean, can’t really get you to stop talking, so-”

“Shut up!” You shrieked. “You wanna know what’s wrong? You. You’ve been pissing me off so much lately, Seungmin. First, it’s the baseball uniform. Like, do the trousers have to be that tight?! Then, you stop me kissing Chan, and make me like, reconsider our whole dynamic for a hot second. Oh, and then, you kiss Dahyun, and that just- that just made me feel all weird. I didn’t like it, I felt weird.”

It was silent for a beat. Another beat passed, and Seungmin was brushing his tongue over his teeth in silent thought. Then, he was pulling into a layby on the side of the quiet road you were driving down, and he unbuckled his seatbelt. The engine switched off and Seungmin turned to you, eyes gazing directly into yours.

“Feel weird how?” He questioned. You scoffed.

“What do you mean?”

“How did it feel weird, brat? You felt confused, maybe a bit sick, awkward even? Upset?” All the emotions Seungmin was quick firing at you had you nodding. You had felt all of those things. Then, all of a sudden, Seungmin was lunging towards you and pressing his plump lips against yours. You gasped, hands going to his broad shoulders. When you felt the material of his baseball jersey, you realised you kind of didn’t want to pull away, and you brushed your lips against his in a response to his movement.

When a second passed, Seungmin’s tongue was pressing into your mouth with fervour, one large hand going to the back of your head to keep you in place. You whimpered into the kiss, your tongue dancing against his and your fingernails digging into his shoulders. When Seungmin eventually pulled away, you chased his lips subconsciously, pouting when he just stared at you. 

“How did that feel?”

“Seungmin-”

“How did that feel, brat? Fucking answer me,” His thumb swiped across your bottom lip, slick with spit from his filthy kiss. You moved to encase his thumb in your mouth, keeping eye contact as your tongue swirled around it. 

Letting his tongue drop out of your mouth, you undid your seatbelt, moving closer to the figure next to you. “Felt good.”

Seungmin hummed, hands moving to grab your hips. He effortlessly lifted you onto his lap, your core settled right on top of the bulge in his fucking baseball trousers. You squirmed, hands moving to brush his hair out of his face. It was a strangely intimate moment, your fingers in his hair. “It feels good because we like each other.”

“Mm, no. Not possible,” You insist. Seungmin’s lips turned up into a smile, his eyebrow raised. “We bicker all the time, and-”

“And you got just so pissed at me kissing Dahyun, just like I lost it over you kissing Chan. I saw you staring at my ass in my game, and in all honesty, I’m staring at your thighs in that dress right now.” 

You look down at your thighs. They were spread immodestly, plush flesh slung over Seungmin’s thinner legs. Your dress had ridden up with your movement, and your core was barely covered by a strip of black lace that you referred to as underwear. It could barely be considered as underwear. Turning your attention back to Seungmin, you saw him still staring at your thighs, a hungry look in his eyes. 

“But- we argue all the time. You boil my blood, to be honest,” You admit, feeling a bit sheepish sitting on top of him like that. Seungmin let out a small laugh, hands moving to brush up and down your thighs. The feeling of his warm hands on your bare skin made you sigh, inching closer for more touch. 

“You piss me off too. You piss me off so much, I want to fuck you until you’re screaming my name and crying. Is that fucked up?” Seungmin spoke, licking his lips. His attention went up to your own lips, to which you were nervously biting your bottom one. “I liked you when you were shy and quiet and you barely spoke. When you became stubborn, and outspoken, I liked you even more. It made me want to fuck you into submission, brat.”

You could literally feel yourself getting wet. Fuck you into submission? Now that sounded fucking amazing. You weren’t surprised he had the exact same sexual interests as you. You were a brat through and through. It’s where the nickname came from, after all. 

“Fuck me then,” You kissed his lips chastely, feeling him groan deeply into your mouth. He entertained you for a few seconds, a filthy swap of spit and tongue before he was pulling away. Your chest heaved, fingers digging into his shoulders once again. “Fuck me. Please, I’ll beg! I don’t care, just-“

“Shut the fuck up, brat,” Seungmin admonished. Your mouth instantly clenched shut in reaction, toes curling in your shoes. He threw his head back, eyes shut as if he was trying to control himself. He was just as affected as you. After a moment passed, he looked back at you, eyes still just as dark. “I’m not fucking you in Sieun’s car. I’ll take you home and fuck you nice and full in my bed. Does that sound good?”

You found yourself nodding, and Seungmin let you reposition yourself back in the passenger seat. You had never felt more excited in your life. Except, when he tried to start the ignition with the key, the car spluttered a few times and then stopped altogether. You blinked at the car. Seungmin took in a sharp inhale of air. He tried to turn the key again, and the car rocked as if in protest, but didn’t start. It was dead.

“Okay, fuck me in the car then?” You questioned, turning to face Seungmin again. You saw him almost laugh, lips curling, before he was shaking his head at you. 

“I like you too much to treat you like that.”

“Seungmin, you treat me badly everyday. It’s our whole thing.”

“Well, yeah, but you’re my girl now. It’s different. We’re still going to bicker like mad, but I’m not having our first time be in a fucking car. Especially not one owned by my sister,” Seungmin sighed, long fingers reaching into his pocket. He clicked a few buttons before he landed on Chan’s contact. It didn’t even ring once before Chan picked up. “Hey, old man. So, we’re stuck in Sieun’s car, it’s finally died. No, I’m not with Sieun. Yes, I’m with her. Chan, can you stop asking questions and just come and save us?”

Your chest was still heaving when you heard rushed murmurs. His girl? He’d called you his girl, and surprisingly… you weren’t all that mad about it. He was sexy, and he was rude. But wasn’t that your type anyway? Taller than you, stoic, bitchy and could actually fuck you good. The last statement was something you had no doubt about, the way he’d effortlessly moved you onto his lap like that… you were squirming in your seat just thinking about it, clenching your thighs together. You didn’t even hear the click of the phone when Seungmin hung up, still focused on trying to get some friction on your core.

“Stop being a brat,” Seungmin demanded. You pouted, turning to him, to which he met your gaze with a steely glare. “I’m sure you can wait until we get home. Chan’s on his way.” How fucked up is it that even though he’s still being mean, he’s just making you like him more?

It wasn’t long before Chan’s sleek black car pulled up in front of Sieun’s. Luckily, you’d parked on a housing street where not many cars passed, so it’d be alright for Sieun’s car to stay there until the morning. Seungmin was instantly unbuckled and out of the car, baseball uniform tight on his legs as he walked over to your side. When you got out of the car, you expected him to walk away from the car straight away, but he had his arm around your waist tightly as if he was escorting you to the other vehicle. You even saw Chan’s confused expression in the driver’s seat. 

Chan only looked more confused when Seungmin followed you into the backseat and sat next to you, leaving no space. “Uhm, so. Back to yours then, Seungmin? We can sort the car tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Seungmin agreed, quiet as his warm hand went to rest on your thigh. Subconsciously, your legs spread to allow him access, and you heard him sigh next to you. Chan started the engine, speeding off down the road. He seemed on edge, turning the radio up loud. 

You stared at the rearview mirror, seeing Chan focusing on the expanse of road in front of him. With one of your boldest ever moves, you grabbed Seungmin’s hand, placing it on the front of your panties where you were soaking through the lace. Seungmin leaned in close, lips brushing against your ear. 

“You want me to finger you while he drives us home? That’s dirty, pup,” Seungmin murmurs. You let out a shaky breath, head rolling onto his shoulder. “Maybe I shouldn’t. You’re too desperate, I don’t think you’ve worked for it yet. Let’s make out a little, how’s that?”

You nod eagerly, fingers moving to grasp on his biceps. “Yeah- I need something, Seungmin. I think I’m going to die, you’re so hot in that fucking uniform, I-“

“You’re filth,” Seungmin groaned. “Fucking- c’mere.” His hand went to the back of your head, yanking your hair back before his lips were pressed against yours.

His tongue pressed his spit into your mouth in the most sexual kiss you’d ever had, and you let out a soft sigh at the feeling. His lips were so soft, so plump against yours and it weirdly just felt right - you liked him a little more when he was kissing you until you were breathless over when he would make fun of you. 

“Okay!” You’d forgotten Chan was even there until his hands clapped together. You both turned to look at him, your lips kiss-bitten and swollen. You were outside Seungmin’s house. When did you even get there? You blinked, staring at Chan. He gave you a wide smile. “I’m so glad you guys have worked things out, but I really don’t want my car soiled. Please go home.”

“Thanks for the lift, old man.” Seungmin was dragging you out of the car by your wrist, all the way up the driveway and into the house. Before you knew it, he was taking you up the stairs, too, and you were standing in front of his door.

Seungmin’s bedroom door. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d even been inside. It used to be littered with figurines and music paraphernalia, and you had no idea what it would look like now. When Seungmin pushed open the door, it looked a lot cleaner and less immature, pristine grey sheets tucked into the corners like a hotel room and only a few baseball items littered around. 

He turned to you, pressing a peck to your lips. “Are you sure you want to fuck me? I have to warn you beforehand, I can get a little…”

“Mean?” You giggle. Seungmin nods, a smile on his lips. “I like mean. I thought I made that obvious.” 

“And I like bratty girls who need to be hurt until they cry. Are you a little painslut, brat?” You nod at his words. You couldn’t think of anything better, molten hot need rushing through you at the mere idea. “Good. Get naked for me and lay on my bed.”

Scurrying over to his bed, you just couldn’t believe you were actually about to do this. You were about to fuck the guy who you absolutely hated a month ago. You would’ve never dreamed of this - but now, it had you thinking. All of the bickering, all of the pissing each other off - had you just been trying to wind each other up for a specific response? Had you been doing it to get his attention? The thought hurt your brain, but you knew one thing. You wanted to fuck Kim Seungmin so fucking bad, and fuck whatever happened afterwards.

The fabric of your dress dropped to the floor once you’d unzipped it, the fabric pooling at your feet. You kicked it away, leaving yourself braless with just underwear on. Seungmin’s eyes trailed down your body, humming when you settled back against his sheets. 

That’s all he did for a while. He just looked at you, taking your full appearance in with wandering, claiming eyes. You found yourself meeting his gaze when he looked at your face. His trousers were even tighter than before, a long, hard erection pressing against the fabric. Letting your palms wander up your tummy, a delicate, grazing touch that made you squirm, you landed on your chest and tugged on your nipples.

“Are you gonna fuck me now, Seungie?” The nickname dropped from your mouth before you could even process it. Seungmin scoffed, before he was pulling his jersey off with haste. It left him bare, exposing soft, milky planes of skin to your eyes. His body was lean yet toned, looking like the muscles would ripple under your fingers but feel so velvety at the same time. It was the perfect representation of his personality. 

He was on the bed quicker than you’d expected, lunging towards you like a primal animal stalking its prey. You gazed up at him when his movement landed him above you, your legs spread around his hips. All that was heard throughout the room were deep breaths when his bulge situated against you through your underwear, the puffs of air spanning across your skin where he leaned above you. 

“Should I fuck you?” He mumbled. You nodded slowly, letting your hips roll up against his. Seungmin licked his lips in response, hands going to pin your hips down. “Tell me what you like.”

You whimpered when his lips went to your neck, sucking on a spot underneath your jaw that felt so, so sensitive. “I like... Rough. Pain. I like it rough, I like being treated like I’m beneath you, but then- God, Seungie- you need to- I need to cum, when we fuck. Please?”

“Men don’t make you cum often, brat?” You shook your head, whining again when he sucked a hickey into your collarbone sharply. “That’s a pity. I bet you look so fucking beautiful when you cum, so desperate. I think I’ll let you cum.”

“Thank you,” You moaned lowly when he trailed his lips further down your body. His lips encaptured one of your nipples, a hard peak so sensitive to his loving tongue. The moonlight shone through his curtains, highlighting the new hairstyle he had and his button nose when he sucked on your breast. As if he’d been building up to it, Seungmin let his teeth bite into your nipple sharply, and you positively squeaked at the sensation. 

Letting your nipple pop out of his mouth, Seungmin grinned up at you. “Good?”

“More, more. Please, hurt me, please-”

“Hurt you?” He shifted again, looming over you in that dangerous, almost territorial way. “What if I slapped you? On your face. Would you like me to make that pretty face red?”

You gasped, eyes rolling back at the mere idea. He ground his bulge into you, waiting for your answer. “I- I love that, please, Seungmin, slap me. Oh my God, please, I think I’m gonna die-” 

You were cut off with a harsh smack to your cheek. Your head rolled, gasping in the aftermath of the pain. It should’ve put you off, it should’ve hurt too much, it should’ve made you question if he really liked you - but all you could think was again, please. That’s all you could say, too, begging him to slap you again. 

“Fucking filthy brat,” He grumbled, hand swinging again to slap you across the face. When your head tried to roll to the side again, he gripped your cheeks with his thumb and finger. You whined incoherently when he looked down at you, squishing your cheeks, until he was letting spit dribble into your mouth. “Mine.”

“Yours,” You nod, agreeing, and Seungmin groans at the sound of you saying it. You heard the rustling of fabrics, the moving of bedsheets and then his cockhead was positioned at your sopping wet hole, panties pulled to the side. You tried to buck your hips into it, trying to catch his cockhead and lure him inside, but his grip pushed you back down. 

“Tell me again. You’re mine, yeah? No more kissing Chan,” Seungmin rubbed the leaking tip against your hole, making you attempt not to squirm again. “No more arguing with anyone that isn’t me, brat. I’m your punching bag, yeah? You take all your anger out on me and I’ll fuck you nice and hard afterwards, hurt you the way you like. That’s what you’ve always done it for, right?”

Your brain was fuzzy. Yes, that’s what you’d always done it for. You had always done it to get a rise out of him, and now that you were being put in your place, it made you feel like you were running a hundred miles an hour through a sandstorm. 

“Yes, ‘m yours, Seungie, please, can I have it? Need it,” You whine, head thrown back against his soft pillows. Seungmin coos at you condescendingly. 

“Do you? But what about prep, brat? It’ll hurt otherwise, won’t it?” Despite his words, he’s pressing the head of his cock inside of you. The stretch was blinding, making your toes curl and hands dig into the pillows. 

“I- I want it to hurt.”

“Of course you do,” Seungmin sneers, before he’s pushing his whole cock inside you at once. It’s long, pressing against your cervix as he bottoms out and your eyebrows furrow, jaw dropping in a silent moan. “That pussy’s so wet, fuck. I turn you on that much?”

“It turns me on to argue with you, turns me on when you’re mean- fucking, Seungmin, please, move,” You were admitting something you hadn’t quite admitted to yourself just yet, but when Seungmin started to snap his hips against yours, your brain went clear of all thoughts. “Ah, oh my fuck- fuck, fuck, fuck- hnng-”

“‘S good? You’re taking me so well, pretty little brat, you want a reward?” You nodded at his words, but you weren’t braced for his hand smacking your cheek once again. You reeled, eyes feeling blurry as his hips picked up the pace. He was breathing heavily on your cheek, warm breath fanning over even warmer skin. “Was that good? You want more?”

“Please, Seungie, please, more, slap me again, harder,” He slapped your opposite cheek this time, a welcome relief from your reddened cheek. The problem was that when his hand collided with your skin, you felt yourself seize up and - oh. You were cumming. “Ah-”

“Fuck, are you cumming that quick? You’re so fucking filthy, pup,” Seungmin groaned, his cock still bullying into your hole. With his pace not slowing, you couldn’t ride out the orgasm properly, and it was just one constant blissful experience. Your eyes rolled back into your head, toes curling with pleasure. “Cumming from me slapping your pretty little face. Dirty fucking bitch.”

“Seungie- I can’t, I can’t take it, please slow down!” You were squealing at that point, fingers digging into the pillows. 

“I don’t think you want me to, do you?”

He was so right. You shook your head, whining out again when he pulled out. Your hole fluttered around nothing, clit still swollen with arousal. Your slick had dripped all the way down to his pristine sheets, tarnishing his once neat room. Seungmin was quick to spin you around, putting you on your tummy with your ass just slightly raised for him. 

Within a brief moment, he was pushing inside of you again. His cock was still wet with your arousal, and your back arched when he bottomed out inside of you for the second time. Seungmin gripped your hair, making your back permanently arched for him. His lips attached to your neck, blonde highlighted hair draping onto your skin. 

“‘S good, so good,” You babbled, trying to push your ass back onto him. Seungmin allowed it this time, his hand moving from your hair to your neck. He squeezed the sides expertly and you whimpered, hands moving to grab his wrist. 

“You like that, don’t you? I’m meant to be your enemy, you dirty bitch, and look at you,” He was chuckling mirthlessly, grinning when you kept babbling. “I guess you like my cock too much. Dumb fucking slut, all I have to do is fill you up and you’re nice and sweet for me.”

“B-Bet you wish you’d done it sooner,” You quip, which would’ve been much more impressive if you hadn’t stuttered it out. “Would’ve shut up for you and been a good girl a long time ago.”

Seungmin hummed. “I think I like you bitchy, brat.”

“I jus’ like you,” You slurred, feeling Seungmin’s pace slow. He’d resorted to a slow, deep grind that had you feeling every inch and every vein on his cock. You could hear him snickering in your ear, and he pressed a cute little kiss to your neck. His free hand went down to your clit, rubbing precise, firm circles against the swollen button.

“Think you can ride me, or are you too cock drunk?” Seungmin hummed. You shook your head rapidly.

“I- too much, can’t-”

“Alright, brat, let me fuck you some more then. I need to cum in this pussy, yeah?” Seungmin was laughing again, and all of a sudden, he’d let go of your neck. You were immediately face planted into the pillows and Seungmin gripped onto your ass, thrusting into you quicker this time. You whined, trying to push back onto him, but he smacked your asscheek in admonishment. Letting your hips shift slightly to allow your hand to meet your clit, you picked up where Seungmin left off with the tight circles. It made the pool of arousal in your tummy clench, and you vaguely realised you were going to cum again. 

“Seungie, please- I want cum, want cum, with me, please-”

“Want me to cum inside you, brat? While you cum around my cock? That’s dirty, pup,” His voice faltered when his hands gripped onto your asscheeks harder, spreading them to see where his cock was entering you over and over. You knew you were soaking, you could feel it - and the wet glide of his length inside of you felt fucking delectable. You recognised no one had fucked you like this before, letting you cum over and over on their cock like this while they held back their own orgasm, and it made your head dizzy. You’d have to come back to Seungmin for more, you thought, and you didn’t hate the thought at all. 

The bed rocking suddenly caught your attention, and you whimpered, trying to alert Seungmin of the noise. The last thing you needed was his parents hearing you get your back blown out by their son, who you claimed to hate. You reached back, trying to grab his arm, but he was groaning loudly, cockhead hitting your g-spot with every thrust.

“Seungie, ‘s too loud, the bed,” You managed to get out, drooling on his pillows. Seungmin let out a loud groan before he was pulling you back onto him, forcing you to fuck back onto his cock.

“And? I don’t care. Pussy’s so fucking good, gonna make me blow, shit,” Seungmin mumbled. “You ready for my cum, brat?”

“Yeah, want it, please, please Seungie, fill me up, breed me!”

“Breed you? You want me to breed this pussy, dirty pup?” He bit your neck sharply, making you keen. You nodded erratically at his words. You couldn’t think of anything better than him filling you up with his cum. “Cum with me. Flood my cock.”

His hand came down on your ass again, and as you felt his hips stall, an unfamiliar warmth filling up your pussy, you let go around him. Your pussy fluttered with delight - probably also confusion, because oh my God, you were cumming twice? With someone else?

It felt messy, juices gliding everywhere as he just rocked his hips a little to ride out your orgasms, and then you were left to fall flat on the bed. He pulled his softening cock out, sighing when your pussy oozed out his cum onto his sheets. He didn’t seem to care about his bed, much more entranced with the sight of your hole gaping after him. 

He’d fucked you so good your pussy was going to remember the shape of his cock forever. That was for sure.

You let yourself drift, brain going blurry until you felt a cloth wiping between your legs. It was cold, slightly wet as it rubbed over your swollen folds, and you whimpered, trying to shift away from the touch.

“Stay still, brat. ‘M just cleaning you up.” You nodded, face still buried in the sheets. It was then that Seungmin finally pulled your panties down, chucking them to the floor and pulling a pair of basketball shorts up your trembling legs. Were they… his? He’d put you in his clothes? Bizarre. You didn’t even react when he spun you over, pulling a baggy t-shirt over your upper body. He’d gotten fully dressed in a plaid pyjama set, baffling you. When had he done that?

You were moved again, positioned on a very firm chest and a bottle of water pressed to your raw lips. You glugged it down thankfully, blinking up at Seungmin. His hair was mussed, but pushed back with a cute Pochacco headband. Wow. He was actually cute. 

There was a beat of silence, then Seungmin spoke. His hand was tracing your scalp, running his fingernails over it. “I meant what I said. You’re my girl. I think you always have been.”

You scoffed. “Yours?! I’m not a possession, Seungmin-”

Seungmin kissed you softly, giggling when you still tried to yell. Had he always reacted this amused when you bitched at him? You realised that… yeah, he had. It really did entertain him. “You’re so cute when you have a go at me like that, you know? Such a brat.”

You twiddled your thumbs together when he pulled away from the kiss, staring at the bottoms of his plaid pyjamas shyly. “So… you wanna be like, together? Since you’re hot, and all.”

Seungmin chuckled again, pulling you closer to his chest. “As long as you never ever stop bitching at me.”

“I don’t think I could stop even if I wanted to.”

“I like you that way, brat.”

END. 

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

EPILOGUE

Sieun stared at you upon your arrival to breakfast. Her parents were preoccupied in the living room, and her eyes settled directly on your neck. You knew that your neck was littered with bite marks, hickies galore, but you’d tried your best to hide it.

“Listen, I’m so happy for you,” She began, hand clasped tightly around her mug. “I know I always ask you for details of sexual escapades, but I kind of don’t need to know about how good my brother is in bed.”

“Oh, yeah, for sure,” You nod, agreeing. “But he does know where the-“

“Stop!”

A mug of coffee is placed in your hands, made just the way you like it. The steaming liquid is a welcome warmth, as is the kiss that Seungmin presses to your cheek. You blush, staring up at him when he wraps his arms around your waist.

“Good morning, brat.”

#juno's fics ♡ #kim seungmin smut #kim seungmin x reader #seungmin fic #seungmin smut #seungmin fanfic #skz smut #stray kids smut #skz fanfic #skz x reader #skz x you #skz fic #stray kids fic #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids fanfic #seungmin angst #kim seungmin fic #kim seungmin fanfic #skz e2l #stray kids e2l #stray kids bfb #skz bfb #seungmin bfb #juno's fics ♡: home run

[leeminho-hall]

.•:｡✧ ♡ ✧｡:•.skz kinktober part II 2023♡.•:｡

list of different kinktober masterlists where stray kids members are included. this list is for me to keep on track with the different kinktober events taking place in the month of october.

.•:｡✧ ♡ ✧｡:•. skz kinktober part I | skz kinktober part III

♡ kinktober by @sugawhaaa ♡ kinktober by @aerasx ♡ simptober (fluff version) by @skz-streamer ♡ kinktober by @triplejracha ♡ sub skz kinktober by @lilquokka04 ♡ skz eight nights of halloween by @/dlmlufics ♡ softtober (vanilla sex) by @whatudowhennooneseesyou ♡ monster fuck by @planet-dusk (op is holding a event where you can send asks with the monster fuck month theme) ♡ smutober by @dreamescapeswriting ♡ spooktober (jisung + chan) by @boydepartment ♡ kinktober by @jinikkari ♡ kinktober by @meowjunjun ♡ flufftober (fluff version) by @hannahhbahng ♡ kinktober by @chanswhxre ♡ kinktober by @delulusungmin ♡ spooktober by @kaciidubs

♡ kinktober by @lixiektty

.•:｡ some of the writers just announced their events, so when they post their official master lists I'll update the links.•:｡

♡ if you see this list, please remember to support the authors listed.

♡ minors and blank blogs don’t interact with the authors.

♡ this list is subject to change, remove, or add works.

#kinktober 2023 #stray kids x reader #stray kids smut #stray kids kinktober #skz x reader #stray kids fanfiction #stray kids #lee know smut #bang chan smut #seo changbin smut #hwang hyunjin smut #han jisung smut #lee felix smut #kim seungmin smut #yang jeongin smut #lee know x reader #bang chan x reader #changbin x reader #hwang hyunjin x reader #han jisung x reader #lee felix x reader #kim seungmin x reader #yang jeongin x reader #kinktober masterlist #smut kpop #kpop smut #kpop

[aeliuss]

#straykids #bang chan #straykids fanfic #bang chan angst #bangchan fanfic #bangchan fic #bangchan headcanons #bangchan imagine #bangchan imagines #bangchan fluff #seungmin #kim seungmim #seungmin angst #seungmin fanfiction #Skz #skz drabbles #stray kids #stray kids scenarios #Stray kids #Seungmin drabble #seungmin fic #seungmin stray kids

[godsmenusuperbowl]

(Literally) Lost in the Woods ~ *Kim Seungmin*

Summary: It's not your fault! He didn't have to take the so-called "short cut". But now that the two of you are alone, you can't help but panic. I mean your crush is right there in a sleeping bag next to you!

Pairing: Kim Seungmin X G/N!Reader

Genre: Fluffyish Oneshot

Word Count: 2051

Warning: Swearing, teasing, inner turmoil

Masterlist

Taglist: @foxwinter @maeleelee @mxnsxngie @kpop-will-kill-me

“Nice going Seungmin.” You grumble, slamming your car door as you raise your phone to try and find a signal.

“Oh please,” he shot back, “you’re one to talk. Who told me to take a left instead of a right?”

“You didn’t have to listen to me!”

He scoffed, arms folded over his chest. “You were adamant that this was the way! And now, not only are we late, but we’re lost too! Everyone’s going to wonder where we are.”

Shrugging, you answer, “perhaps they will. But I’ll just tell them it was your fault.”

You felt a smack against the back of your head, and you shot a venomous glare to the offender. All he did was give you his cute puppy dog smile in response. You scowled, as you dropped your phone and turned it off. “There’s no signal. We’re stuck here.”

“Then it’s a good thing I sent a text to Chan before we made that stupid wrong turn telling him we were probably going to be late.” Seungmin replied.

“You shouldn’t text and drive.”

“And you shouldn’t force people to take a ‘shortcut’ when you don't know for certain if it is a shortcut or not.”

Rolling your eyes, you mumble, “thanks Seungmin. I really appreciate that.”

He opened his mouth but shut it a minute later. Instead, he sighed and went back to the car. You glanced backwards to see what he was up to, but decided you didn’t care and began to mess with your phone. With any luck, Chan had a plan to come find you guys and you’d be saved before you had to spend the night with just Seungmin.

Besides, it was Felix’s dumb idea to go camping together in the first place. Of course, you’d never tell him that in person, but it was a dumb idea. It’s like he knew you were trying to avoid Seungmin like your life depended on it. And he probably did. He was perceptive that way. At least he had the decency to suggest all of you go camping together, that way if you were really dead set on avoiding Seungmin, you could play it off as just wanting to spend time with the others.

You swallowed a groan as you laid back on the hood of the car. This was hopeless. You never should have agreed to go on this trip. It should have tipped you off when they made the two of you take your car by yourselves. This was all some elaborate ruse for you to tell Seungmin why you were avoiding him. But you’d rather die than tell him, thank you very much.

The sound of the car’s horn jolted you off the car. 

“Hey, get up.” He shouted at you from out of the driver’s window.

“WHAT THE HELL SEUNGMIN? WHAT WAS THAT FOR?”

He didn’t answer you. Instead, he got out of the car and tossed your sleeping bag at you. “Here. Take that. You’re going to need it.”

You frowned. “We’re not seriously camping out here, right? We can keep circling around until we find the campsite.”

“We’re almost out of gas. I’m not going to waste the rest of our supply trying to find the others.” He explained with a look of indignation. “Besides, we’re technically still in the campgrounds. Nothing is going to get us if we camp out here. We have a tent. We have some snacks. And we can always huddle in the car if it gets cold or starts to rain. No big deal.”

To him, it was no big deal. To you, it was life or death.

“Fine.” Your voice came out strained, but you tried to ignore it. You moved to help him as he pitched the tent for the two of you. You also tried to ignore the thoughts that you would be sleeping so close to him in this tiny tent.

“After this, we should get some firewood.”

You nodded. “I’ll go east, you go west.”

He gave you a teasing impressed look. “You know your directions? If I had known that, I would have asked you to help get us out of this mess.”

Rolling your eyes, you shove him playfully. “Oh please. You do know which way west is, don’t you? Because if you know your directions as well, you could also get us out of this mess.”

Seungmin scoffed. “I know which way west is. Besides, you suck at putting this tent together. I’ll let you get a head start on finding that firewood while I finish up here.”

Standing, you brush your hands on your pants and say, “Alright. I’ll have way more firewood than you by the time I’m done.”

“I’ll hold you to it.”

With a huff, you walk into the copse of woods next to your makeshift campsite, and start picking sticks for the fire. It was pretty easy to find firewood and you could tell you’d have more than enough very soon. However, your mind was elsewhere instead of the little bet you made with him. 

You were stuck in the woods with none other than Kim Seungmin, the guy you’ve had the biggest crush on for the past year. This was literally the worst case scenario, a cringey cliche you’d read in trashy romance novels. Sure it was fun to read about, but not to experience yourself. 

Besides, this was Seungmin you were talking about. If you did make it to the campsite, you were sure the other Stray Kids members were instructed to try and throw the two of you together. But now it looks like it was going to happen without their help, which made you feel the tiniest bit better. However, if you did somehow try to confess to him, and he rejected you, the painful awkwardness would increase tenfold as the two of you were stuck together. You couldn’t do it. You had to keep your mouth shut about your feelings for him. You couldn’t bear to have him hate you or even worse, make fun of you for your feelings.

Eventually, you had too much firewood for you to carry and you carefully made your way back to the campsite. Seungmin wasn’t there, and you assumed he was looking for his own firewood. So you stack your wood, create a makeshift fire pit with rocks and the sticks, and light a fire.

By the time he came back, you were already preparing the food you brought. “Not bad, but I brought back more.”

You frowned. “Likely story. At least I started the fire. You were too slow to come back.”

All he did was laugh and set his own firewood next to yours. The two of you shared a meal together and you showed him constellations in the sky. If you didn’t think too hard, you could pretend the two of you were on a date together. If only that were true. But you tried not to think about that.

When you couldn’t stop yawning, Seungmin stood up and held out a hand to you, which made your eyes widen in surprise. “C’mon. Let’s go to bed.”

You had to remind yourself you weren’t dating, that you were two sort-of friends that were on a camping trip together.

Ignoring his hand, you slip into the tent and into your sleeping bag. “Good night, Seungmin.”

“Good night.”

You hoped sleep would come easy to you, but you were annoyed to find it eluding your capture. You couldn’t stop yourself from tossing and turning, trying not to think about the boy sleeping next to you. At least, you hoped he was asleep. You’d hate to be what would be keeping him awake.

“Hey, are you awake?”

Seungmin’s voice was quiet and a little unsure as he called out to you in the dark.

You stop moving to answer, “I’m awake. What’s wrong? Do you need me to put more wood on the fire? I can do it.”

“No.” He answered quickly. “It’s not that. It’s just…”

When he trailed off, your heart clenched. What was he trying to say? “Yes?”

“Why are you avoiding me?”

You were really hoping he wouldn’t ask you that question in a million years. And yet here it was, floating before the two of you, waiting for your answer. You didn’t know what to say and yet a million things rested on the tip of your tongue. What could you tell him? What did he want your answer to be? You wish you had the answer, but it was just out of your reach.

The sound of his sleeping bag caught your attention and you shouldn’t have looked, but you did anyway. Seungmin had turned so he could look at you, his head propped up by his hand. There was no malice or frustration in his eyes that sparkled even in the dark. Instead he looked at you with genuine curiosity and a little sadness, judging on the downward curve of his lips. Despite the look he gave you that tugged harshly at your heartstrings, you still couldn’t think of a “right” answer.

“I love you.”

Well, that certainly was an answer.

His eyes widened at your words and you wanted to swallow them. You wished you could rewind back to the start of the day so you could avoid this whole mess. But that was impossible. Just like it was impossible to take back the words that were now hanging like a thick fog between the two of you.

“Oh.”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. Let’s just go to sleep and forget I said anything. Tomorrow we’ll find the others and we can put tonight behind us where it belongs.”

It hurt to deny your feelings like this but you had no choice. He didn’t seem to accept your feelings, though he didn’t deny them either. Still, you didn’t want things to go this way. You wanted to confess when you had more courage and could face him with certainty. Now you could never speak such words to him again, lest things become awkward like they were right now.

“I don’t want to forget.”

His words were so quiet, you almost lost them in the middle of your inner breakdown. Now it was you who turned to look at him with wide eyes. However, his gaze was anywhere but yours.

“What I mean to say is, I may or may not like you an awful lot too. I mean, uh, love is a strong word for right now. But I do like you more than what a friend would. But I was scared to tell you. I’m not very good at being vulnerable, and I wanted to do this right. I thought that on the car ride back from the camping trip might have been a good time to tell you-”

“And yet I ruined it by saying it now.” You couldn’t help but giggle. “Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh, but it’s just funny that we were both worried about the same thing when it came to telling the other our feelings. I mean, I didn’t mean to say I love you, because I agree, love is too strong right now. But I do care almost too much about you, Seungmin.”

He smiled and your heart almost melted. “That’s good to hear. Because I feel the exact same way.”

“I can’t believe this happened like this.” You returned his smile. “But I’m glad it did. I would have died if the others heard this.”

Seungmin nodded, his expression dropping to gravely serious. “Absolutely. They do not need to know a single thing, alright?”

You nodded and linked your pinky with his. “Our confession will be our little secret.”

He brought your interlocked fingers to his mouth and kissed them, making you blush. “We should really get some sleep now.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Good night, Seungmin.”

“Good night.”

As you turned away, you smiled into the night. Your heart felt full and you were satisfied. Though the two of you didn’t define your new relationship, it didn’t matter right now. What did matter was that you knew he liked you just as much as you liked him. Suddenly, you didn’t feel as lost as before. Not with Seungmin next to you.

#Stray Kids #Stray Kids Fanfiction #Stray Kids Oneshot #KPop #KPop Fanfiction #KPop Oneshot #Stay #Kim Seungmin #Kim Seungmin X Reader #Kim Seungmin Fanfiction #Kim Seungmin Oneshot #Kim Seungmin Fluff #Seungmin #Seungmin X Reader #Seungmin Fanfiction #Seungmin Oneshot #Seungmin Fluff #Oneshot #Fluff #Angst