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bakersimmer · 1 year

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Sims 4 Flower Garden Legacy

This legacy is inspired by flowers and the meanings attributed to them. I used the interpretations from two books I found on my mother's bookshelf.

These are more like guidelines and thoughts on how to make your different generations more interesting, especially if you are like me, and you need goals and challenges to stay engaged. I didn't have time to playtest all the generations, but I know it's possible to push your sims to the limit without cheating.

First things first

TS4 is easy enough to play without cheating

Different generations are linked to different expansions

Objectives are not in chronological order

To add more excitement, try out different mods

There are no assigned traits, but some traits would make your sims life easier. Follow your gut on this

There are no assigned colors. Again, follow your gut

English is not my first language, so please ignore any grammar mistakes 🙃 unless I wrote complete gibberish and you don't understand a single word in a sentence, then let me know

G1 Azalea

Azalea symbolizes friendship, family, joy, and tradition. With the right amount of sunlight and water, this low-maintenance plant will bring an abundance of color and beauty to your life.

You have a gentle and nurturing personality, with a talent for caring for others and creating a warm, welcoming environment. You prioritize spending time with loved ones and creating meaningful connections with others in your community. You find joy in the beauty of nature and have a passion for gardening and spending time in the kitchen.

Aspiration: Big Happy Family

Have at least three kids

Develop the highest possible skill level in cooking, baking, gardening, flower arranging, and parenting

Have some kind of social event with family and friends every Saturday (dinner, bbq, etc.)

Grow at least 10 different types of flowers in your garden (As of May 2023, there are 24 flowers in the game)

Use only low to mid-range furniture and appliances. Never replace anything, fix it yourself

To make money, you can only sell what you have grown or made yourself (vegetables, flower arrangements, preserves, cakes)

G2 Hollyhock

Hollyhock symbolizes ambition, abundance, resilience, and determination. With little care, this tall and sturdy flower will bring vibrance to your garden.

You always felt like you had to compete for the attention. You are highly ambitious, striving to achieve your goals and exceed expectations. While putting a lot of emphasis on your education and career, you neglect your close relationships. You struggle to express your feelings and connect with others on an emotional level. Despite all this, you are a loyal and supportive partner who does everything to show your feelings in a more practical way.

Aspiration: Academic -> Fabulously Wealthy

Complete the first aspiration and move to the next one

Get the best possible grades in elementary school, high school, and university

Have a career in business. You aim for the top

Marry the first sim you have a romantic relationship with

You are the breadwinner. The spouse quits their job after marriage and never works again

Don't spend much time with your child/children

Your home has medium and high price items. When something breaks, you always replace it with a new one

Pass the family money to the next heir

G3 Hydrangea

Hydrangea symbolizes vanity, arrogance, and desire. With little care, hydrangea brings elegance to your garden with its large and showy blooms.

You are highly creative and have a refined sense of style. Being in front of the cameras feels natural to you. You are self-centred and tend to prioritize your needs and desires above those of others. Thanks to your skills and fame, you accumulate a large amount of wealth.

Aspiration: World-Famous Celebrity

Develop the highest possible skill level in charisma, comedy, and acting

Go to a club/restaurant at least twice a week

Have one Meet and Greet in every season

Use mean interactions often

Change your hair color at least 3 times in your life

Hire a butler

In old age, an unexpected wave of generosity hits you, and you donate all your wealth

G4 Yarrow

Yarrow symbolizes strength, courage, overcoming and recovery. This flower will grow even on the poorest soil and doesn't require any care to thrive.

You grew up in luxury and wealth, but now you have nothing. Despite the obstacles, you are determined to provide for yourself because you want a stable and secure life. It is very important for you that your children are equipped with the necessary skills to be independent and successful by the time they move out.

Aspiration: Renaissance Sim -> Super Parent

Complete the first aspiration and move to the next one

Start with 0 money and a tent

In addition to work, dumpster dive to find valuables that you can sell (Don't sell collectibles or paintings/music/books for extra cash)

Attend different skill classes

Choose medicine as the last career and work in that field until retirement

Fall in love with a patient and end up marrying them

All your kids must gain a Top-Notch-Toddler trait

Always help your children with homework/school projects

All your kids must gain at least one positive character value trait

G5 Gardenia

Gardenia symbolizes sensuality, passion, and secret love. This sweet and intoxicating flower requires a little bit more attention from its grower.

You have a magnetic personality and natural charm. You are a hopeless romantic who tends to get caught in the passion and excitement of new relationships. You avoid long-term commitment because you fear that the daily routine will kill the excitement and passion. For that one special person, you are willing to take a chance on love despite your fears.

Aspiration: Serial Romantic -> Soulmate

Complete the first aspiration and move to the next one

Have a childhood friend who later becomes your soulmate

Work in Public Relations (Social Media career)

Get married at least 3 times

Woohoo in 10 different locations (As of May 2023, there are 23 locations/ways on the list)

No kids until adulthood

Reconnect with your childhood friend and settle down with them

G6 Protea

Protea symbolizes dreams, exploration, courage, and resilience. This plant needs a lot of space and sun to grow. It should not be planted deeper than the surface level of the soil.

You have a strong sense of wanderlust and a need for adventures. You love new experiences and cherish old memories. For you, a job is just a means to an end.

Complete two adventure/location-based aspirations

Develop the highest possible skill level in fitness, photography, programming, and logic

Work as a freelance programmer

Complete the postcard collection

Move repeatedly and live in at least 3 different worlds

Settle down in one of the desert/warm climate worlds (Oasis Springs, StrangerVille, Sulani, Del Sol Valley, or Tartosa)

Go on a family vacation in every season

G7 Snapdragon

Snapdragons symbolize passion, deception, denial, duality, and strength. This eye-catching, mostly warm-colored flower spices up your garden.

You are a master of deception, leading a double life. At first glance, you appear ordinary or even mundane, but looks are deceiving. Beneath your boring surface lurks something more sinister. Your purpose in life is to make others' lives a living hell because seeing them suffer is your favorite pastime. You are very passionate about your hobbies...maybe even a little fanatical.

Aspiration: Chief of Mischief

Develop the highest possible skill level in mischief, singing, piano

Fight with 5 different Sims

Become a Triple Agent (Secret Agent Career)

All your kids have to play one musical instrument at the highest possible skill level before they become young adults

All your kids have to have one negative character value trait

G8 Daffodil

Daffodil symbolizes new beginnings, rebirth, truth, and creativity. Daffodils love sunlight and well-drained soil. Therefore, the best growing place for this flower is an open and raised flowerbed.

You are a detail-oriented individual driven by a deep desire to uncover the truth. While searching for the truth, you stumble on a secret that will profoundly challenge your worldviews. You are loved and supported by your community, who admires your dedication.

Aspiration: StrangerVille Mystery & Friend of the World

Work as a journalist

Be a member of at least two clubs and host club meetings every week

Solve StrangerVille Mystery

Get married to a sim who helped you defeat the Mother Plant

Host at least 8 different types of social events in your lifetime (As of May 2023, game has 25 different social events)

All your kids have to complete the Social Butterfly aspiration

G9 Rudbeckia

Rudbeckia symbolizes justice, fairness, motivation, and optimism. Rudbeckia is a hardy flower that loves evenly moist soil but can also survive drought and scorching sun.

You are a highly principled individual deeply committed to upholding justice and protecting others. You are willing to make great sacrifices to ensure that justice is served. After work, you enjoy creative pursuits which allow you to unwind from the stresses of your work. You desire balance and harmony in your home life.

Aspiration: Painter Extraordinaire

Develop the highest possible skill level in wellness, painting, knitting, and cross-stitching

Work as a detective

Have a romantic relationship with one of the suspects but break it off eventually

Own a house with a large and luscious backyard where you spend most of your free time

Be strict with your kids, and never miss an opportunity to discipline them

All your kids have to earn the Emotional Control trait

G10 Lavender

Lavender symbolizes spirituality, intuition, devotion, and growth. Lavender needs a lot of light and warmth. Although this flower looks hardy, it's highly receptive to changes in the soil.

You are fascinated by the concept of magical and mystical, so you spend a lot of your time exploring spiritual practices and rituals to connect with this hidden world. You are determined to connect with and become part of the supernatural world. You have a soothing energy that puts others at ease.

Aspiration: Choose a vampire, spellcaster, or a werewolf aspiration

Develop the highest level of Medium skill

Work as a paranormal investigator

Become a friend with a vampire, spellcaster, or a werewolf

Become a vampire, spellcaster, or a werewolf

#ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 legacy #sims 4 legacy #sims 4 flower garden legacy #ts4 flower garden legacy #flower garden legacy

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9leaguesofmirrors · 3 months

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Two F*cked Up 30-Somethings (a Ross Gaines x Joseph Lisgoe fanfic)

Usually I put a little introduction here, but I can't think of anything to say... so... onto the content warnings!

CONTENT WARNINGS: Themes of abuse in the workplace, mentions of physical abuse (overviews of things that have happened in canon) and coercion (both in the show and fanon)

"Sorry, go through that again?"

Lisgoe leaned back against the sofa with a sigh, running his fingers through his hair as he looked at his partner with a tired expression

"I thought you, of all people, would get it - you're the smart one!"

"It's just confusing."

"Hammonds, the store, owes my boss, Hammonds, a large sum of money. Hammonds needs the money for renovations, so they got it from Hammonds. Hammonds wants that money back, so I have to make sure the twats that work for me get the money owed from Hammonds so they can pay back the accounts they took from Hammonds. Hammonds isn't associated with Hammonds, and Hammonds has nothing to do with Hammonds."

"... Right." Unsurprisingly, this didn't help much "And by 'the twats you work for', you mean-"

"Barry and Glenn."

"Not Liz?"

"No, Liz left years ago. They're a tattoo artist now, did a few of mine."

Ross nodded, sitting in silence for a moment as he tried to piece the story together

"I think I get it now."

"You just saying that so I change the subject?"

"You know me too well, Joseph."

The topic of work wasn't their favourite in the world, but Ross would've been lying if he said he wasn't curious. However little he mentioned of his job, Lisgoe told him even less

Ross had his reasons for not divulging the whole truth about his job, and since he and Lisgoe were equally as secretive, he started to wonder whether it was for the same reason

"Is Hammonds, your boss, still... you know-"

"An insensitive todger? Yeah."

Lisgoe chuckled, but it didn't reach his face

"What about that Polly woman? She still a piggish twat?"

"If you mean Pauline, then she's officially morphed in a cow." Ross knew Lisgoe was trying to change the subject, and he wasn't about to let him. Not just yet anyway; they say curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back "Why do you never tell me about your boss?"

"I tell you what you need to know, and all you need to know is that he's a prick." Something in Lisgoe's demeanour shifted, he became guarded. Closed off "If you wanna know his favourite colour, go ask him yourself."

Once again, silence filled the room. Not the usual silence they'd grown accustomed to. No, this was a thick, uncomfortable silence that fell heavily around them like smog

"I don't ask about Pauline," he continued, not looking at Ross, rather directing his attention to the floor "so don't ask about Hammonds."

And that was the end of the conversation.

*********************************************

Lisgoe had shut himself in their bedroom again

This didn't shock Ross too much, sometimes he did that when work was particularly damning. It was either that or directing his anger at him, and he knew Lisgoe would never have done that. No, Lisgoe was too fiercely loyal for something like that

The conversation they had a week or so ago about Hammonds and Pauline, and the way Lisgoe bluntly shut it down, had plagued his mind. It's not like they weren't allowed to have private lives, they were as much individuals as they were a couple, but his partner's reaction had him concerned. Maybe something happened, or maybe it was an accumulation of-

THUD

Oh no...

Ross didn't even remember his legs carrying him up the stairs, but they must've. Because one minute he was downstairs hearing the noise, and the next he was knelt on the floor beside his partner - who looked extremely out of it

"Joseph-"

"D'nt worry 'bout me." he mumbled, sitting up wearily as he tried to put on an unphased expression "'S fine, 'm... fine."

Deciding it was best not to correct that statement, Ross managed to move him so his back was propped up against their bed, and he sat beside him. One hand rested on the outside of Lisgoe's thigh

No words passed between them. Ross simply waited until Lisgoe was sick of the silence

"Just 'ad a long day..."

"Then why are you clutching your arm?"

"From when I fell over." Ross' face was clearly more suspicious than he thought, because Lisgoe huffed "'S true, d'ya wanna see?"

Once again, that strange smog filled the air, so humid it felt almost gooey. Like oil and sludge coated in fog

In this silence, he could see that the bags under Lisgoe's eyes were more prominent before. His movements were slack and it were as if his eyelids were made of lead, seeing how much effort it took for him to keep them open

"How many hours have you slept?"

"... 4 hours."

"That's 2 less than what you need in a day."

Lisgoe turned his head and their eyes met

"I didn't fucking say 4 hours a day, did I?"

"Joseph-"

"D'sn't matter, does it? I'm not dead yet."

"Joseph, tell me you've slept more than 4 hours this week."

"I've slept more than 4 hours this week."

"... That's a lie, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

The smog thickened around them, Ross took off his glasses for a moment, just to massage his temples with a sigh. Yes, there was clearly a reason why his partner wasn't sleeping (he was always a night owl, but this was bordering on insomnia). That didn't mean it wasn't irritating

Clearly, Lisgoe could read minds. Or maybe they knew each other that well

"You're not gonna go 'til I tell you, are you?"

"No."

An exasperated sigh left Lisgoe's lips as he leaned back against the bed again, eyes closing for a few seconds. Ross couldn't read his expressions, but he had little time to ponder it before that tired gaze was returned to him

"I'd rather sort stuff out here than get given shite at work." Lisgoe explained "If it doesn't get done exactly how Hammonds wants it, I get my ass handed to me."

Suddenly, black fog had turned a dark, hazy grey that swirled in a way that almost engulfed Lisgoe entirely. Not quite, but when Ross looked at him he couldn't quite make out the face

For a moment, it were as if he was staring into a mirror

"You're not the only one going through that."

It was meant as a comfort, but the look Ross received in response suggested that it'd come across a lot more accusatory

"What I mean is that Pauline's similar. Egregious brute of a woman, can't handle things not going her way. Uses violence as a way of controlling people, power-hungry bitc... well, she's not the nicest."

He expected a chuckle, or a small sign of agreement. Instead, he watched his partner brings his knees to his chest, chin resting against them in thought. While his body was situated next to Ross, it was as if Lisgoe's mind had travelled to a different place and time. One that caused him it shrink in size, a glimmer of something in in his eyes. Something unseen and out-of-place in them

"Joseph-"

"I beat my co-worker last week."

Ross said nothing

"Hammonds was on my ass about an outstanding account, 500 smackers and those twats I supervise have been behind for a month now. Of course, Hammonds is gonna fucking blame me. I confront them, lay it down. I'm not nice about it, when am I ever nice?"

It was at this point that Lisgoe looked away. His eyes glued to the ground, as if replaying the event in his head in order to tell the truth in its entirety

"One of them, the tubby one, starts saying all this stuff about how I've been "sat behind my desk too long" and just... he pissed about. Fucking treated it like a joke, had no clue the sort of pressure I'm under. You know what I'm like when I get disrespected-"

"You hit him?"

Ross didn't speak, just watched as his partner mustered up the words, or maybe it was the courage, to explain himself

"I remember the aftermath. I stormed out and just fucking walked. No clue where I ended up. Didn't give much of a shite really. Too busy going over everything. Pushing him to the ground, smacking him with that belt he always wore. Might have broken a light, not sure..." He huffed, frustrated with himself "I'd tell you more details if I could remember them, but I don't fucking know. You don't register shite when you're in that state. It's only afterwards that you put everything together. It's when you start wanting to kill yourself."

Those two words caused Ross to flinch slightly

"I won't." Lisgoe said "I'm sure a lot of people would want me to, but I won't.

"I wouldn't want you to."

"You want Pauline to die."

"That's different."

"Is it? Are we really that different?"

It was a good question. Ross wasn't naïve. He knew about his partner's temper. He never felt scared of him though, never felt threatened or like he was in danger. How different were they? The person that ruined his life and the one that seemed to make it worthwhile. Should he fear them both equally? Oddly enough, even now, he felt no trepidation towards Lisgoe. Even though his partner's words brought back memories of Pauline's tyrannical reign over the Job Centre, something in Lisgoe's body language suggested that their twin reactions stemmed from very different places

"Hammonds pushes down on you, and you push down on yourself." He said "Pauline was just a nutter, you were trying to survive."

"Well fucking hell, I'm doing a shite job at it!"

"Aren't we all?"

He assumed it was lack of sleep that caused Lisgoe's head to droop onto his shoulder and he didn't draw attention to it

"Is it all emotional? The abuse between you and Hammonds?"

"Nah, he's too thick to be some master manipulator, he just likes to use threats and throw his weight around... I mean, he- well yeah, that's it."

"Joseph."

Wordlessly, Ross places his hand on his partner's lower back, tracing it round to his side as he turned his head to face him. He noticed the way his jaw tightened, as if there was bile rising up from the pit of his stomach

"Joseph-"

"I went to him, said I needed some time to reach a target. Only needed a week or so, I would've sorted it out quicker than either of the idiots under me - I always do. Hammonds wouldn't have it, but I wasn't gonna back down. I'm a stubborn bastard, I am."

Ross watched as his partner shifted slightly, arms wrapping around his stomach like he really was about to be sick

"Eventually, he gets up from his desk and stand next to me. I know you'll sort this out he says but I don't do favours. I deal with transactions."

Suddenly, Ross began to feel nauseous too. But for very different reasons

"He puts his big fucking elephant hand on my shoulder and goes there are two ways we can go about this." Lisgoe's eyes squeezed shut as he sat up. Ross didn't know why until he saw the remnants of water in them once they reopened "He knows my cousin, knows about the little side-job he had. Apparently a hit was ordered on Hammonds, but before it could be carried out..." a wave of melancholy that he quickly snapped out of "obviously shite happened."

There was a buzzing. Like static, like a TV starting up. It was loud and all-consuming, but only Ross could hear it

"He said I could either make up for all the shite I've given him, or I could tell him where my cousin's buried so he could make him pay for what he was planning to do."

"So... you mean-"

"Either I suck his cock or I betray my dead cousin's trust."

To say that images formed in Ross' mind would've been inaccurate. The memories were half-formed and incomplete, audio crackly and pictures dipping in and out of darkness

"Gotta tell you Ross, people will do fucking anything for a little bit of power."

Can I offer you a drink to toast your engagement?

"They'll say anything."

Come on... One last taste of freedom

"Then, when the dickheads can't get to you, they'll bring up the few people you give a shite about."

You realise I'll have to tell him... just betrayed his trust in the most intimate of ways

"Fucking scum, the lot of them."

By now, the static and the noise was all-consuming. To call it drowning would've been too kind. His partner's words, through unintentionally aimed, shot straight through him. Not like an arrow, but more like a sword being pushed slowly through him. When he finally managed to meet Lisgoe's eyes, his stomach lurched when he saw him staring right at him. Something in his face telling him he knew exactly what was going on in his head

Damn him for knowing him too well

"How the fuck did we end up here?" Lisgoe asked with a sigh "We're pretty much each other's worse fucking nightmare, so why are we here?"

Silence. Ross was so sick of silence. Sick of the twisting, churning feeling that he was losing the one person that bothered to stay. Nothing in his life had any permanence. People came and went, nothing lasted forever. Now he'd found someone that he truly could see becoming part of his future, which made him all the more agitated about this moment in time

The thing is, if Lisgoe wanted to go, Ross would've let him. Because that's what you do when you care about someone, you put their needs before your own

"Is this you saying you're going?"

The look of confusion on Lisgoe's face was a strange comfort

"Why? It's not like I've ever felt threatened by you, wouldn't be living with you if I did. Besides, it's not like I'm gonna find someone else that can put up with my shite." he laughed a little" I'm a fucked up 30-something, who's gonna love me now?"

"I'm not much better."

They looked at each other, the smog dissipating

"No, you're not, are you?"

Lisgoe's lips quirked, like he was holding something in

Then his shoulders shook slightly

And his face broke into what looked like a smile

His hand rested on his knees and he covered his mouth, his laughter starting to break through

"It's not funny, Joseph."

Ross' words, drenched in a chuckle, were completely ineffective

"No, it's not, is it?"

"Then why are you laughing?"

"Why are you laughing?"

"Because you're laughing! What else am I meant to do?"

"I don't fucking know, not laugh?"

It was a strange thing, laughing in a situation like that. Laughing in the face of abuse, of how much it had screwed them both up. But, in many ways, they were both strange. Even stranger, perhaps, was the fact that two very different people could find a sense of belonging with the other. Even when they were stuck in a painful situation, one that would take a damn long time to break out of

And they had no idea if they would or not. They had no idea what was in store for them, how long it would take, how many pushbacks they'd face. All they could do was wait for it

Wait in anticipation

Wait in wariness

Wait in uncertainty

Wait in exhaustion

But, as they sat there, trying to quiet their laughter like two schoolboys hiding from their next lesson, they knew that, together, they would never have to wait in fear

#league of gentlemen #the league of gentlemen #joseph lisgoe #ross gaines #gainsgoe #gainesgoe

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cazort · 2 months

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I see a disturbing number of people, mostly millennials, these days, who have significant incomes and are starting to amass significant savings, who have terrible financial management skills. People who live at home with parents and get a full time job can accumulate money really fast. A lot of people are letting huge amounts of money, like sometimes as much as $20,000 or more, accumulate in checking accounts where it is earning either no interest or negligible interest.

Because inflation is high (over 3% these days), you are effectively losing money when it sits there. Also you're allowing the bank to profit off it; it's lending your money out to other people, often at interest rates as high as 6-7% or more, and it's not paying you for it.

If you have more than maybe around $3000 dollars in an account, you want that money earning interest. Here are things you can do to earn more from your money:

Open a savings account at a higher yield. Go to a different bank if necessary. CIT Bank has rates around 5% these days.

Pay off high interest rate debt but not low-interest rate debt. If the interest rate is above about 7-8% definitely make it a priority to pay it off ASAP. If it is above 5% it is still better to pay it off than to sit on your money. If it is much below 5%, pay it off as slowly as possible (minimum payment only) because there are risk-free ways to earn more interest on your money.

If you don't need the money in the short-term, consider a CD (Certificate of Deposit) which offers a fixed interest rate over a certain time. Often you can get a slightly higher rate by tying your money up for 3 months or 6 months or sometimes even longer. These are good options if you have a specific expenditure in your future, like perhaps moving or buying a home, but you know it won't happen until after a certain date.

Open a brokerage account. Brokerage accounts allow you to buy and sell investments such as stocks, mutual funds, or bonds, which include CD's from banks as well as treasury and municipal bonds and corporate bonds. You get more options for buying CD's (i.e. you can compare many different banks side-by-side, buy CD with the best rate, and manage multiple CD's within a single interface.) Most brokerage accounts have no fees and typically no or very low minimum investments. There is no reason not to have one if you have a few thousand dollars.

In a brokerage account, buy a money market mutual fund. Look for one with no load and no transaction fee, a high yield, and a low expense ratio, and a fixed share price of $1 per share. My two favorite are SWVXX and SNSXX. SWVXX has a higher yield (about 5.19%) whereas SNSXX has a lower yield (just over 5%) but is non-taxable on state income taxes, so SNSXX is a better choice if you have a high state tax rate, otherwise SWVXX is better.

Consider opening a Roth IRA if you haven't, and then, if able, contribute the maximum amount each year. You are allowed to make a contribution that counts towards the previous year, up until the tax filing deadline of the current year. So for example today it is Mar. 14th, 2024, so you can open a Roth IRA today and contribute the max ($6,500) for the 2023 year and also the max ($7,000) for 2024, for a total of $13,500. The main advantage of a Roth IRA is that the money in them can grow tax-free. Roth IRA's benefit anyone able to have one (the richest people are not allowed to contribute to them) and are especially important for people who are self-employed, change jobs a lot, or never work full-time, so they don't have a consistent employee-provided retirement plan.

Consider investing in stocks. Stocks are riskier (in that their price changes, and you can lose money when investing in them), but tend to have a higher yield than savings and money market accounts and funds. The simplest way to buy stocks is to buy an ETF (exchange-traded-fund). I recommend buying one that follows the S&P 500 and has a low expense ratio like SPY or VOO. Whatever you buy, reinvest the dividends and let it grow, contribute a little money every year so are putting in money even in years the market is down. On average you get about a 10% return in the market but it is unpredictable and you will lose in some years, but that's okay, you're not retiring for many decades and the money will have grown a lot by then.

There are options regardless of your risk profile. It is throwing your money away to let a lot of money sit in a checking account. At a bare minimum, go for a high-yield savings account, CD, or better yet get a brokerage account, put it in high-yield money market funds like SWVXX, shop around for CD's or other bonds with the highest rates, and if you are able to tolerate some risk and want a higher return, consider putting some money in more aggressive investments like stocks.

I am 100% for tax reform and other reform to curb the extreme concentration of wealth in the hands of a few, but it's also important to take your financial situation into your own hands. Get financially comfortable. Get a stake in the US economy. Empower yourself so you can live better and help your family, friends, and the causes you care about.

#financial advice #personal finance #financial management #money management #cash management

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femmefatalevibe · 11 months

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Hi Femme!

Hope your day is going well! Just a quick financial question: how can I save up while paying off credit debt (🙃) and paying bills off?

I’m working but I’m only getting paid $15 ! And I’m also planning on saving for moving out. But I feel like it’s impossible. I want to build up a good savings account but I’m new at it as well.

Thank you!

Hi love! This is a vague question as I have no clue as to how much you make per month, what your monthly expenses are, the debt you've accrued, or the interest rate & terms of your credit card debt. Here are my general tips, but please note that I'm in no way a professional. Please contact a CPA for personalized, expert information on how to move forward with your financial life. Some high-level tips are below:

Track your income & expenses. Know exactly how much money is coming in and going out every month, so you know how much of your income is going towards your monthly expenses.

Do an audit of your expenses. See how much of your expenses are essential purchases. Without rent or utilities, I would imagine these are quite low (I don't know if you pay for any food at home, though).

Know exactly how much debt you're in and the interest rate of all of your debts.

Determine how much of your monthly income goes towards these essential expenses. Subtract this number from your post-tax income. Multiply this number by 3 to 6. This is the emergency fund savings you need in case any unforeseen expenses/job loss occurs. Use this information to determine your debt payment and savings timeline. Personally, I believe you should have at least a month of savings available for use before committing to paying off existing debt. This way, you don't accumulate more debt in the process of trying to get out of the debt you've already accrued.

Create a timeline with a self-assigned monthly payment plan to pay down your debts. When it comes to consumer debt, I believe outside of a small 3-month emergency fund, it is best to be as aggressive as possible to pay it down, especially if you're living at home.

For your savings, I HIGHLY recommend putting this money in a high-yield savings account.

Hope this helps. Best of luck xx

#personal finance #financial planning #savings tips #credit repair #credit cards #debtfree #goal setting #finance #savings account #savings plan #life skills #life advice #femmefatalevibe #q/a

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rendy-a · 2 years

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Pampering a domestic pet – Trey, Jamil, Ruggie

This is part of Aurora’s Pet AU. @glass-cage-of-emotion-12

Keeping house is a hard job. Sometimes our more domestic pets deserve a show of appreciation!

It started when a storm dropped an old tree on the shed in the backyard. You had to have everything removed from inside so it could be repaired. It was an exhausting job, but all your pets chipped in to help move the shed contents. Well, most of your pets.

Trey made a picnic lunch that could be eaten outside between moving the garden supplies and other miscellaneous junk you’ve accumulated in the shed over the years. The sandwiches were on homemade bread and had an accompanying pot of fresh tea to go with.

It’s a great meal but Trey seems a bit bashful about it. Sorry I can’t be of more help master. I’ve got to keep a close eye on dinner so it doesn’t burn. You reassure him that the lunches he makes are help enough. That doesn’t stop some of the other pets (Ace, I’m looking at you!) from teasing him about skipping out on the hard work. He takes if like a pro (that big brother experience is being put to use) but you wonder if it gets tiring dealing with the other pets like this.

Maybe he deserves a reward for taking care of everyone (and putting up with Ace’s teasing). You decide that the perfect thing for someone like Trey is to have time totally to himself. After the shed construction is complete, you have the old armchair from the study set inside with a small table, perfect for holding a book and a pot of tea. For the rest of the week, the shed is off-limits to the other pets (especially Ace)! Trey is able to take the afternoons off from his duties, retreat into his own space and enjoy some much-deserved alone time.

At the end of the week, you move the chair and table back into the house and the shed returns to its former purpose. Trey goes back to baking breakfast, lunch and dinner. What’s this recipe? Have we had this before? Trey gets a mischievous smile on his face. Why master, I’ve had a lot of time to think of new ideas lately. I hope I can surprise you even more in return.

Jamil takes the management of the household very seriously. From the food you eat, to the brand of cleaner he uses for the laundry; everything is overseen by Jamil personally.

On the rare break he allows himself (while the special dessert for later bakes), Jamil will sit in the study and leaf though your old magazines. He seems especially fond of those featuring far off places and tourist sites. If you ask him about it, he will deny being interested in travel. Who will take care of his many duties if he goes away? He can’t indulge in such frivolous fantasies.

The next morning, you call him to attend to you after breakfast. There you give him a very special duty. You’ve become obsessed with having that special jam you once had from the little shop on the sea-shore where you used to take your holiday. So obsessed, that you simply must send Jamil to fetch a jar. It’s a long way to the shore though; he’ll be gone for at least three days.

As much as he argues about leaving you without his assistance, you give him money for train fare, lodging and food and send him on his way. The train ride is relaxing and quiet. He spends the majority of it just looking out the window at the unfamiliar scenery. Every stop, he exits the train just to look about the station until its time to reboard. At night, he will make sure to eat at a restaurant featuring something he has never had before. Perhaps these are new recipes he can cook for you master?

The seashore itself is a solemn experience for Jamil. The feeling of the sand beneath his feet is nostalgic; almost like a memory of a childhood he has forgotten. Of course, he doesn’t forget about your precious jam. Not only does he buy the requested jar, he arranges with the shop to send a new jar every other month so you never run out; what a clever plan! Of course, I managed everything perfectly, master. That’s the bare minimum for a house pet like me.

For Ruggie, nothing is as exciting as getting a deal. That’s what attracts him to the local flea market held in the town square every Wednesday. It’s the perfect place to rip off barging with the locals and show off his skills. He brings home some treasure each week and a tale to entertain you about how he got it.

This week, you have time off from work and decide to accompany Ruggie on his errand. Why not make it even more fun? Have you heard of the game ‘Bigger or Better’? So, you challenge your pet to meet back at the entrance in one hour with the best item. Winner gets to ask a favor of the loser! Are you sure you want to challenge me master? Ok, I’ll show you my skills shishishi!

An hour later, you return to the plaza entrance with a large glass vase. Ruggie is already waiting for you with a couch, carpet and box of donuts. You really aren’t sure how that is even possible, but he just laughs at your confused look. Shishishi! Looks like your lap will be my pillow this afternoon. Be prepared, master!

You spend the afternoon on the new couch with Ruggie laying in your lap. Rub his ears, won’t you? He certainly earned it!

#twst #twst wonderland #trey clover #jamil viper #ruggie bucchi #pet au #twisted wonderland

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bitchesgetriches · 2 years

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The Magic of Unclaimed Property: How I Made $1,900 in 10 Minutes by Being a Disorganized Mess

Spoiler alert, kids: almost nothing worth doing can be done quickly or easily. By definition, people only seek quick and easy solutions to long and hard problems! “One cool trick” ads ain’t out there saving lives.

The same is absolutely true for money as well. If it could grow on trees, there’d be a fuck ton more arborists. Alas, currency is a scarce commodity that’s difficult and time-consuming to accumulate by its very nature.

I say all of this so that you understand how shocked I am to be writing an article with this headline… and meaning every word of it.

I just made $1,900 very quickly and very easily. And you may be able to make money in the exact same way—but it only works if you are as irresponsible and disorganized as I am.

Intrigued? Mwa ha ha! … good.

Let’s say you move into your first apartment and plop down a $500 security deposit.

Years pass. You eventually get a new job, move to a new city, and leave your old apartment behind. And you didn’t provide your old landlords with your new address, so the rental management company has no idea where to send your $500 check.

By law, the rental company can’t just keep your money. They must turn it over to the State Treasurer. The Treasurer keeps a record of to whom the money belongs. If that person reappears and proves their identity, the Treasury will cut them a check for the missing money.

How common is this?

Uh, real common! About one in ten people have unclaimed property.

The money may not even be yours! If you’ve inherited an estate (from the passing of, say, a parent or grandparent), your deceased family member could have unclaimed property. As their heir, you’re entitled to it.

So wait—how do I know if I have unclaimed property?

Y’all. It’s so fucking simple I kinda wanna cry…

You go to the official website of the Treasury Department of your state. Then you type in your first and last name, and hit search.

That’s. It.

You can Google your state’s name, plus the term “unclaimed property.” Or check out this handy list from Unclaimed.org.

WARNING: be extra careful that you’re actually clicking on a legit link! It really doesn’t help that 100% of these websites are suspiciously ugly and badly designed. So always follow the link directly from a reputable source.

#personal finance #unclaimed property

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gobbluthbutagirl · 8 months

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sorry if this is weird but as someone who hates their hometown and wants to leave it's very inspiring to see your posts about hating south carolina/wanting to get back to la...gives me hope that one day i will also escape lol. anyway hope you're doing well i'm rooting for you from afar

thank you! not weird at all don’t worry! and you WILL escape one day i believe in you!

also i know you didn’t ask but number one piece of advice i can give for Getting The Hell Out is once you do Get The Hell Out do NOT compromise about where you live. if there is virtually nothing you like about an apartment do NOT move in there! you will NOT magically start liking it at a later date! and it’s one thing if you hate where you work because you don’t live at your job but if you hate where you live too? you’re pretty much screwed because that’s what you have to go home to every night. that’s the main thing i did wrong because i was kind of in a beggars can’t be choosers type situation(no credit score, no rental history, no current income and my last job in sc had paid me like $4 below what LA’s minimum wage was at the time) and i didn’t want to keep airbnb hopping, i wanted to start my life in la NOW so i moved into the first place that would take me and that place was an old ugly dirty tiny shithole studio with no oven and a one-legged florida man landlord named dave who still had a “stop the obama agenda” sticker from 2010 on his wall and it cost $1,425 a month. SAD!

and then the other big thing i did wrong was, because tipped workers in LA make the same minimum wage as non-tipped workers, i applied for retail jobs instead of serving jobs. and obviously it depends on where you’re trying to go because that’s kind of an LA-specific thing and if you move somewhere where tipped workers make $2.13 an hour it obviously does not matter nearly as much. but i could have been making waaaaaay more money that whole time had i not gotten so caught up in the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of World’s Worst Target.

but yeah. live and learn! and the great thing about the way it worked out for me(getting so fed up with that apartment that i decided to go back to my hometown temporarily instead of staying there for potentially 6+ more months while i found a new job and accumulated the 3 months of paystubs i’d need to move to another place) is i still have all the money i had managed to save up while working at target. which is enough that i can literally move back at any time. and i have a temporary “job” that i’m doing right now that will probably last until mid-september (it’s a process that i’d estimate is about 65% done currently) which coincidentally happens to be the “ideal” time to look for a job according to some guy buzzfeed wrote an article about who’s worked in hr for like 20 years. so probably september/october i’ll start doing some WFH customer service job and between january and march i’ll have been at that job long enough to have 3 months of paystubs and will therefore be able to move back to LA & into a non-shithole apartment. so ultimately at the end of the day i do believe it’ll all work out for me. And also that, as a wise episode of 30 rock once said, sometimes the way back up is down

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madam-wakefield · 4 months

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Fairy lights

Why does Serena have so many fairy lights? My little drabble written for the @berenaadvent day 18 prompt "fairy lights"

Read on A03

“Why does one need so many fairy lights?” Bernie questions confused as she opens a large box that is literally full of smaller boxes of fairy lights. It’s the first Christmas where she is living with Serena and they had wanted to keep to Serena’s tradition of decorating on the first weekend of December, thankful they’d managed to get one shared day off to allow them to do so.

Bernie had, being Bernie been the one who insisted on getting all of the boxes out of the loft and now the living room is so full of boxes that Bernie wonders silently if there aren’t more boxes here now than when she moved in. She’d lost nearly everything physical during her split with Marcus, he’d keep nearly every possession from the house, even though most of them had been accumulated during their time together. She’s just thankful she had a good enough solicitor that he didn’t manage to take all of the money too, and he definitely won’t be entitled to a penny of her hard earned army pension.

She’s brought out of her musing by Serena’s reply. “One can never have too many fairy lights. First there is the ones for the trees, both the one in here and the one in the conservatory. Then there are the fairy lights that go in the windows, and then I have a set or two that I like to put outside, though I must admit without Elinor’s help they haven’t been able to go up the past few years. Jason doesn’t feel comfortable enough holding the ladder and instead likes to reel off facts about how many people get seriously injured each year from falling off ladders, as if my job didn’t give me an insight into that.

So that is how Bernie and Serena spend the majority of their day, ensuring the fairy lights around the house are perfect. Once the inside lights are finished Bernie insist, she’s the one who goes up the ladder, big macho army medic and all that. It’s how she spends over an hour up a ladder outside their house hanging fairy lights to the guttering. By the times she’s finished her hands are numb with cold but it’s worth it to see the smile on Serena’s face when both her feet are finally back on solid ground.

That night when Bernie goes up to bed a few minutes after Serena, having offered to be the one to ensure the dishwasher was on and all the lights have been turned off, the last thing she expects to find is Serena naked expect for the fairy lights that she’s managed to expertly managed to wrap around her body, and well they are one set of lights Bernie definitely doesn’t mind untangling.

#Berena Advent 2023 #Berena Advent Fairy Lights #Madam Wakefield Writes #Berena #Bernie Wolfe #Serena Campbell #Berena Fanfic #Holby #Holby City #Buckle Fandom

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judgeanon · 10 months

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Plastic Skies - Model 11: F-22 Raptor “Mobius-1″

As soon as I had a couple of finished models under my belt, I knew what I wanted my “Final Boss” to be. There was one plane that I really wanted to not just build, but build right; to do the absolute best job I could with it. It took me a while to get there, and there were a few bumps and stops along the road, but in the end I managed to not only build it, but also close the circle of what had inspired me to start modelling again.

It was time to become an Ace. Or at least try.

So, the F-22 Raptor. I love that thing.

Everything about it is just cool as fuck to me. Its shape, silhouette, hidden weapon bays, everything. It's just square and sharp enough to look futuristic while still having enough curves to still look like a fighter jet and not some jank spaceship.

The other reason why I love the Raptor is Novalogic’s old F-22 RAPTOR flight sim from 1997. At the time, and for a long time, it was the best flight game I’d ever played, looking and feeling lightyears ahead of any other flight game at the time. Even if the Raptor has famously never been in any actual combat or downed any enemy planes (which as far as I’m concerned is the best thing that can happen to any weapon), it’s sure seen a lot of virtual warfare. Especially in another series...

The thing about Ace Combat is that I’d never really played them until a bit under a year ago. As I mentioned when I started this series, I knew they existed and I’d had a few close brushes with them, but I’d never sat down and played any until Ace Combat 7, which promptly blew my mind. Soon, through the power of emulators, I made my way through every single game in the series. And one of the things I noticed was that every Ace Combat is actually two games in one: there’s the game before you unlock the F-22 Raptor and the game after.

In pretty much every Ace Combat, the Raptor is a late-game unlock, and always one of the best. It’s faster, moves better, and just using it feels like dropping the difficulty level down at least one. On top of that, it’s been featured in the covers of a lot of them, including the very first home release:

So playing through the series really reignited my love for the damn thing, to say the least. And when I entered the hobby shop for the first time and spotted that Revell kit up there, I knew I was going to end up building one sooner or later. But I held off for months, building other models, learning every technique I cared ot try and accumulating an arsenal of tools. Along the way, I also ran into something wonderful: an eBay listing for a decal sheet full of emblems from Ace Combat, including everything I could need to build not just any Raptor, but THE Raptor. Mobius-1′s Raptor from Ace Combat 04.

As it turned out, there had been an official AC04 Raptor model kit released some years ago, and while getting my hands on one was out of the question, the instructions were easy to find online. Turns out the model used the exact same mold as the Revell one, and the instructions included a color guide that helped me find the exact shades of gray used on the official thing. You’ve actually seen that gray paint in my F-16 and Fairey Swordfish models. It’s not the easiest paint to work with, but I was happy to have it and the decals. Between them, I had everything I really needed... except the model itself.

Unfortunately, 2023 didn’t have the best of starts for me, especially when it came to money. Long story short, my job started paying me late. Like, very late. Insultingly late. “Three months late” late. Although my family generously loaned me enough cash to make it through, it was a very upsetting era of getting paid, spending a third of it paying last month’s debts, then having to stretch what was left for two months until I got paid again and the cycle started again. It’s why I’m deeply indebted not just to my family, but also to the friend who sent me those old WWII models I posted about last time, since the frustration of having all these tools and nothing to use them on was really getting to me.

Eventually, in early March, I finally got paid and after clearing up a bunch of leftover debts, I said “Fuck it”. Whatever else was going on in my life, I decided I needed something to do other than worrying about money. The price of the kit had gone up since the last time I’d seen it, which was frustrating but also made the decision to buy it even easier. Get it now, before inflation made it any harder to grab. Unlike every other plane I’d built so far, I told nothing about it to my family. A part of me felt terribly guilty about it. Where did I get off, buying toy planes when less than two weeks ago I was asking my brother for grocery money? It was childish, irresponsible, and at the time, utterly necessary. I was increasingly feeling like I would go insane if I waited one more day.

Unfortunately, I’d still end up waiting one more week to really get started, since just as the kit arrived, my mom invited my brother and I to a short vacation trip. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to finish the kit, but by then I was so upset by the whole thing that I nonetheless spent an afternoon focused purely on the tailfins. Stupid as it sounds, I just... really needed it.

The trip was fine. Good times were had, new places were explored, mountains were hiked, and I can’t say I hated it or anything. But the closer we got to the end, the more I remembered those two tailfins drying out alone and the other 114 parts I hadn’t touched yet. It was late at night when I finally got back home, and that night I set everything up to get started first thing in the morning.

Unfortunately, that morning I woke up to a pretty troubling phone call. My dad had some health issues, and ten minutes later I was hailing a cab to go ride an ambulance with him to the hospital. I left home at around 9 AM that day, and only got back at 7:30 PM. He’s safe now and made a full, if lengthy recovery, but the days and weeks of having to be ready to drop everything and rush to the hospital to check on him quickly became grating. As with the trip, I found myself living for someone else, putting everything else I wanted to do on hold for the sake of others.

It didn’t last long. Once I was sure dad was out of danger and comfortable in the hospital, and once the rest of the family had started mobilizing to help, I once again said “Fuck it” and finally dove right into the Raptor, making it my personal anchor, a little thing I was making just for myself and nobody else.

The build started alright, but quickly ran into some trouble. A few of the parts were a hard fit, and the fuselage had gotten bent and warped a little in the box. Plus, I figured painting some of it would be a pain once the whole thing had been built, so I started painting some pieces as I went along. Which was absolutely the right choice, but it meant a fair bit of stop and go.

Something I did decide early on was to go “wheels up” with this one, not doing the landing gears. I figured an Ace Combat plane would be best displayed in flight, all weapons at the ready. I’m glad I made that call, because the build was already giving me enough headaches without the wheels.

Those little edges across the plane’s contour were particularly troublesome, since they required a lot of masking tape to work. I’m not terribly good at masking yet, and if you compare the two sides of the plane, you can tell. Still, it really was nice to see everything finally taking shape.

I also skimped on the armaments a little. The kit came with tons of decals for all the missiles, but I have a lot of trouble with the little stripe ones that usually go on them, and doing it for eight different missiles was daunting to say the least. I knew that alone was going to be a whole day’s worth of work. So I decided to save myself the trouble and just leave them like that.

The camo pattern, by comparison, was surprisingly easy to pull off. Using the paint guide from the official model, a couple of fine brushes and some very good gray paint, I did a much better job of it than the poor F-16.

The decals were a similar story. Funny enough, they actually came from three different sheets: the Raptor’s own, the Ace Combat one I’d bought off eBay, and that white marking in the center, which points to the Raptor’s fuel tank. Real Raptors use a different marking nowadays, but the one from Ace Combat 04 used this older model, which I got from the F-16′s sheet. In fact, that decal sheet was one of the reasons why I’d bought that specific F-16. By then I’d already decided to build Mobius-1, and I knew I’d be able to use that decal to give it that final touch.

Speaking of final touches, the panel lining also went shockingly well. This is one of the things I’ve gotten way better at, no longer having to rely on the sludge technique or anything. It’s still tricky and time consuming, but I can’t deny how much it improves a model, even when done sloppily. I also went and bought a box of transparent orange paint just for the cockpit, which in hindsight is... a little nuts. I have no idea what else I could possibly use that paint for, but I didn’t want this to be just another kit.

I left the weapon bays for last. Truth be told, I was a little terrified of them. Lots of small parts, two of which actually broke during the build and had to be tossed out. The end result is by no means perfect, and one of the side missiles is completely wrong, but by now I’ve learned to accept the small imperfections and let go of the things I can’t really fix (or am too scared to try). All poetry and self-improvement aside, I was squarely in that “let me just finish this” moment.

(It’s a good thing that I got the weapon bays done well too, because without a landing gear and a stand base, the plane currently rests on the bay doors. I should probably do something about that soon...)

Through the whole process, I still felt a few pangs of guilt over building this while dad was in the hospital. He wasn’t at risk or anything and I still made time to go see him, but there was enough shame to it that I didn’t really show the finished plane to any family member until about a week ago. And even then, I didn’t tell them when exactly I built it. As far as they know, I just willed it into existence in a couple days. It’s a terribly selfish thing to think, but after putting myself on hold for the sake of others in so many ways while also dealing with being routinely ignored by my work, having this one thing to make was important to me.

Eventually, the Raptor was finished. There’s a lot in it. Decals from three different sheets, paints and washes from about five different brands, a lot of material in general. There’s also a lot of me in it. Kid me, playing a 90s flight sim on an old Pentium and clumsily putting together cheap kits with cheaper glue, and adult me, falling hopelessly in love with a decades-old game series and comparing paint numbers to make sure I have the right shade of gray for the job. There’s some guilt and shame in it, but also pride and satisfaction. Even if I never built any other plane kits, I at least now had my Raptor. Not just a Raptor, or the Raptor, but my Raptor. With everything that entails.

(Also, you can’t understand how much I adore that the stabilizers are movable)

Things are getting better now. Dad’s way healthier and I’ve managed to more or less stabilize my finances, while also getting close to some new job offers. But for about a week, when everything else was a whirlwind of anxiety, this chunk of painted plastic was as good of an anchor as any. And I’m happy to say it’s not, in fact, the last kit I’ve made.

#My Stuff #Hobbies #Journals #This one gets a little personal too #Planes good #Ace Combat good #That's about all that really matters #Find some time for yourself

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kalcifers-blog · 11 months

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MAG 114209: The IRIS of The Eye

A JSE Ego x TMA Crossover fanfic

Content Warning!! Discussions of violence, self inflicted injury and insinuation of suicidal behaviour. Nothing is in graphic detail, but please stay safe while reading!!

[Tape Recorder clicks]

The Archivist: (sighs) Alright, let's try this again shall we-

Chase Brody: oh for fu- is that really necessary? Why do you people all insist on recording people??

The Archivist: oh- sorry this is just- procedure. It's kind of my job to make sure statements are recorded properly- unless you don't- want- to make a statement?

Chase: (interrupted the last sentence) No- no. I'm sorry- I just- I need to do this I think. I'm not exactly sure what this place is but... I think- somethin' tells me that this is the place to get this out there somehow

The Archivist: I see.. well. Whenever you're ready, we can begin

Chase: (deep breath) okay. Yeah I'm ready.

The Archivist: Alright. Statement of Chase Brody regarding the entity referred to as ALTR 114209. Statement taken directly from sub- from Mr. Brody himself. Statement overseen and recorded by Jonathan Sims. The Archivist. Statement begins:

Chase: [statement]

I feel like I can't really talk about this without some context first? I grew up in Ireland- you- you probably already guessed that because of the accent- but yeah. I'm from Ireland. My life there was miserable. I grew up in a small town. One of those classic "everyone knows everyone" schticks. Mostly because my Ma insisted on going to the local church to do all her socialising- I went there too consistently 'til she passed. I was 15 at the time.

Before she did I was convinced I wanted her out of my life, we never got along- I'm not saying that I completely change my mind now it's just- when someone like that leaves your life forever you start thinking about "what could have been" far more often. When she did pass I knew I wanted out- I needed to get away so I saved up my scraps of money to go to college in Britain. Maybe I wanted to get away or run from my feelings- I just. The way everyone would look at me, knowing what I was going through, giving me these- disgusting looks of pity- I needed out. I needed a get away.

So I moved. My Father didn't care too much, the man was out half the time for work and when he wasn't his hand was glued to his ale. I told myself I wouldn't end up like that- miserable sack of shit but- (chuckles sadly) I- I guess things don't always go to plan, huh?

Anyway- My life did start turnin' around when I got to the UK. The college I went too was pretty mediocre but the people I met were some of the most incredible- the person who changed my life forever in ways I couldn't have ever imagined was Jack.

Jack was my first friend- after realising we where both Irish and kinda had a really uncanny similarity to us, everyone always joked that we had to be twins because of how similar we looked. Despite the fact I'm nearly four years older than him- anyway uh- he got me into gaming.

I'd played games before of course but, this was the first time I played proper video games, especially the horror games, my Ma tried convincin me anything to do with horror was born out of evil and well- actually playing them for the first time was really eye opening as to how stupid that idea was.

I know this all sounds like useless information but I promise it's important- what you need to know is that Jack was my best friend. He introduced me to things that would be some of my favourite things ever, he was there when I got with and broke up with my first boyfriend and through everything, all of those disgusting sides of how bad my mental health got, Jack was one of the only ones who stuck by my side. So when he asked me to be his editor when his YouTube career took off I didn't think twice about saying yes.

I don't think I need to tell you about the successful YouTuber Jacksepticeye- and how he's the largest ever YouTuber from Ireland- how he managed to accumulate millions of subscribers before his disappearance on Halloween of 2016.

Of course, now I know that video that was put up on his channel that wasn't uploaded by me or him and definitely wasn't edited by myself wasn't actually a fake.

No one knew what to make of "Say Goodbye" when it first released. For me I was confused- Jack obviously can edit videos on his own, in fact its pretty common for him to do so- but he always lets me know if he does. There's never been an occasion in which he didn't in the entire time I was working for him. So when that video dropped with no warning I immediately felt off about it.

I won't tell you what happened in that video. You don't need to hear the details of Jack seemingly hurting himself to the point that he was placed in a medically induced coma- I was watching the video itself when I got the call- his doctor- German if I had to guess from his accent, calling me to let me know and to ask me some questions, due to the nature of his injury.

I don't care who comes in to tell you. Jack did not try to kill himself. I refuse to believe he ever would. Jack like I mentioned, was more than my boss, he was my closest friend and we told each other everything. There was just. Nothing. Not a single thing to indicate in his life that he would ever want to hurt himself like that.

I ended up staying in contact with the German doctor, his name's Henrik Schneeplestien- really nice actually. And it was talking to him that I got an email from Jack's account. Not his business "Jacksepticeye" account- his personal one, the one I knew he used exclusively for things that where for his personal life.

When I got that email my blood froze over. It was a video. It was that video. But it was longer. There was more to it. Instead of Jack's body lying there- lifeless and bleeding out. It jerked. It jerked upwards- like his muscles and joints where all connected to strings and being hoisted up against his will, like a fucking puppet.

The thing wearing Jacks dying body laughed. It laughed tormenting us- Henrik started believeing me after watching it with me the first time.

I'll spare you the details of how my life derailed after that. The months of waiting for Jack to wake up. Of Henrik losing his mind trying to understand what's going on. The disappearance of both Jack's body and Henrik himself. Me finding the most beautiful woman on the planet and finally feeling like a person again with her. Only for her and our child to be ripped away from me by that fucking thing that insisted on destroying everything in my life that gave living meaning.

Every time something bad happened it was there, still wearing Jack's face. Puppeting him around with this wicked smirk it had some crude inside joke I wasn't apart of.

I lost everything. My friend was gone, my wife and child where dead, the only person who ever cared to hear me out was missing and to top it all off I had some demon wannabe kicking my skull into rock bottom. Just so I knew that my misery wasn't over.

I had enough. I drove myself to a forest, it was our favourite place to go to as a family in the short 3 years we got to be a family. I wasn't planning on leaving that day. I decided then and there that I wasn't having it anymore. I was done. That thing won. I gave in and I just wanted it to be over.

I still can't tell you what happened to me. But I was in the forest one second and the next I was on top of a parking garage miles away. Whatever happened to me, I knew it was the only weird thing that wasn't brought to me because of that fucking monster. I still don't know what- but I just. I just KNOW alright. I just. Know.

Anyway, not long after that I'm detained by IRIS. Your institute already have all the information you need on that fucking place. I was there for questioning about what happened to me that day. And my experiences with the thing thats been destroying my life. There wasn't anything more to say other than what I've already told you.

They where about to put me under "special containment" dragging me against my will further in the building. The whole building felt like it was screaming at me to leave- that something bad was going to happen- I wished I was wrong.

That thing came back. It was still wearing my friends face and it killed any and all workers that came close to it. All it said to me was "hello, Chase" before I blacked out. I don't remember how I somehow managed to wake up in London- or how this nagging voice in my brain told me to come here. I don't know what "ALTR 114209" is, why it decided I was going to be it's plaything or what it even is. I just....

I just need someone to know that this thing is out there and more people will die if IRIS continues the way it has done for years now.

[Statement Ends]

Chase: (deep sigh) Jesus- I- How'd you- how did you get me to do that-

The Archivist: trust me, that's a long story- I just. I'm sorry are you insinuating that IRIS is somehow- responsible? For the actions of this entity?

Chase: yeah I thought I made that pretty fucking obvious man. IRIS has done nothing but hide the truth from me, borderline torture me and do absolute jack shit when something bad happens to anyone- including their own workers mind you.

The Archivist: Okay well... Fair enough. But please be cautious, if IRIS is behind all of this. You don't want to talk about it here, not in a place like this

Chase: oh just because your boss is watching doesn't mean I have to worry about him snitching to the SCP ripoff

The Archivist: wait- what did you jus- how did you- do you. (Whispering) Do you know that Elias Bouchard is listening and can see everyone in the building- there's no way for you to of....

The Archivist: Oh..... I see.. Chase I- I think I know why you might be a target-

Chase: (quietly) wh.. what- what do you mean by that..?

The Archivist: let me get you a drink. This will take a long time to explain.

[Tape Recorder clicks off]

That's all!! Thank you SM if you read through this, I'm very new to writing fanfic so I hope that this is alright!! A lot of people really liked the idea of a crossover between JSE lore and TMA so of course I had to write up how I imagine Chase Brody's Statement.

Again thank you SM for all the support and I hope to get some more drawing/writing done soon!! <333

#jacksepticeye #jse egos #chase brody #jse #jse fanfiction #jse ego fanfic #the eye tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #fanfic #writing #crossover fic #honey quartz blog

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friendly-purple-glutton · 5 months

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How does your ocs manage to live their daily lives once they get to a heavier size

honestly that's a very good question. i imagine it'd vary from character to character and how big they get.

if we're talking "huge, but still mobile," i can imagine they'd definitely need special accommodations at their places of work. icey already has a stepladder at her place of work since she's only 4' tall, and i can imagine her boss giving her more specialized help.

if we're talking full on immobile blobs, i can imagine one of the most obvious things would be moving towards work-at-home type jobs as opposed to jobs you need to drive to. streaming, office jobs, maybe even camgirl shenanigans if they REALLY wanna push the boat out.

at some point they'd all just make money by virtue of being so dang huge. sort of like how when some people become famous for doing a specific thing, they just kinda start accumulating money from that. maybe starting a fundraiser for getting them even bigger

#fat fur #fat furry #icey's characters #blob #fatfur #weight gain #icey talks

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sortafriendly · 1 year

Text

Chapter 2

CW: Mention of Death

Summary: Finally free from your shackles, you find yourself in the office of Doushin Shikanoin. Though as you two continue conversating, the more you realize you were never really free to begin with. Will you keep running from your past, or, are you ready to finally confront it?

Your wrists were still relatively sore from the uncomfortably tight restraints you had been in roughly 15 minutes ago, and yet even as you attempted to ease the pain, you were currently more worried about why you were sitting in the office of Shikanoin Heizou and not in the holding cells downstairs.

“…… Are you gonna tell me what your endgame is here?”

“If you’d give me a second to find the file I will gladly tell you—“

Heizou continued to rummage through the abnormally large pile of cases that had accumulated on his desk. Having taken a rather prolonged vacation to Watatsumi Island this past month, the cases that needed his attention had grown exponentially. Now where was the one in particular he was looking for- oh. It seems he found it. You watched Heizou snap his fingers in a celebratory exclamation as he procured the specific file he had been looking for, his signature cocky grin never leaving his face.

“Aha~! Here we go. I apologize about my office, it’s not normally this messy. You take one vacation and suddenly the entire commission forgets how to do their jobs… Just kidding~. Anyways, onto the main topic here. The file.”

After moving the files he would need to sort through later, Heizou hopped up onto his desk and began to thumb through the folder he had been relentlessly searching for moments ago. His olive eyes flickered over the pages briefly, only breaking contact to meet your annoyed gaze. It almost feels like he’s purposely wasting your time, and at this point you’d rather be back downstairs with the rest of the treasure hoarders. When he finally found the document in the folder he was looking for, he extends it out for you to look at. Upon seeing the contents of the flier, you reach out frantically only to have your attempt squandered as he pulls the page back and holds it just out of your grasp.

“Ohoho~ Someone’s feisty. C’mon now, you didn’t think I’d let you destroy a vital piece of evidence in my case did you?? Now what about this missing persons flier got you so worked up- oh.. That’s right, it’s you on there, isn’t it, Y/N?”

You swallow hard, your face hot as you stare up at the detective perched upon his desk as he waved the flier over his head, taunting you. What was he getting at here? Was he going to turn you back into your parents for the large sum of money they had offered? You grit your teeth, feeling your brow furrow in agitation. This wasn’t a game. As you open your mouth to say something of the sort, he chuckles a little, places the page back into his file and tosses it onto his desk before resting his chin against the palm of his hand.

“Now now Y/N, surely you don’t think I’m going to turn you in or something, do you?”

“Why else would you have shown me that?”

“I promise you that isn’t the case. If it were, wouldn’t I have just quietly whisked you away and made our way to your family home??”

“Well then what the hell else do you want?”

“Straightforward, I like it. What I want Y/N, is answers.”

“.... And what do I get out of this?”

Your question seemed to catch the detective off guard, and after shaking himself from the initial shock, he simply smiles. It’s not often someone blindsides Heizou, however, from his expression you can deduce you have in fact done so. Give yourself a pat on the back.

“Well Y/N, I did get you out of confinement didn’t I? Surely that should be more than enough payment for a few measly questions, yeah?”

“... Fine. Shoot. What do you want to know?” A sigh escapes your lips as you concede to his logic as most people do. Grabbing a chair, you sit down and stare lazily up at him, the unamused look never leaving your face. “Mind you I can’t promise I know anything, so choose your questions carefully.”

“Naturally. Question one: Why would a member of the prestigious Minamoto Clan be caught slinking around with Treasure Hoarders and Nobushi?”

“I didn’t want to be part of my family’s business.”

“Oh? Is that all there is to it? I mean- I can understand the weight that the name Minamoto carries being overbearing, but there’s something more going on here. Something you’re not telling me.”

“You ask this question as if you already know and you just want confirmation of your suspicions.”

“Don’t tell me I was being that obvious~.”

“What do you know, Detective Shikanoin?”

“I thought I was the one asking questions here.”

It feels like he’s running you in circles, which is something you’re not too fond of. When you furrow your brows and glare up at him, he straightens his posture and holds his hands up defensively. You’re not one for trivial games like this, at least, not when your freedom is at stake here.

“Fine, fine. I’ll stop yanking your chain. Your behavior has all but confirmed the research I’ve done.”

“What? The Tenryou Commission has been looking into my family?? Since when? Why weren’t we- ahem, I mean, why wasn’t the head of the clan informed of this?”

“Well, the commission isn’t the one performing this… audit of sorts. Would you believe me if I said it was an independent investigation?”

“Why would you do that?”

“Since you answered my question, I’ll answer yours. The Minamoto Clan is one of the largest supporters of the Tenryou Commission and is also known for producing a long line of strong exorcists to work in tandem with the Grand Narukami Shrine’s shrine maidens right??”

“Yeah, everyone knows that.”

“Right, so why would a clan of exorcists suddenly take an interest in the merchant trade? Not to mention, the connections the current head of house has don’t seem to be new exactly, this is something he’s been developing behind the scenes for quite some time now. Another noteworthy detail is the drastic increase of treasure hoarder attacks on small, local merchants that aren’t affiliated with any of the known guilds. Last but not least, you. After the current head of house assumed his position five months ago, you mysteriously vanished and this missing person’s report was placed on my desk.”

“When was the report filed?”

“Hmm let me check.”

Picking the file back up, he flipped through to the actual report itself to scan the date.

“March 17th.”

“The day after I left and.. Bastard.”

“That’s a bit harsh don’t you think?”

“Hardly.”

As you scoff at the situation, you feel Heizou’s gaze pierce through the mask you’ve hidden yourself behind. Seeing you shift uncomfortably, he relaxes his expression and clears his throat, recentering the conversation once more.

“So. Question two: Why were you hanging around with the hoarders and nobushi?”

“Do you want the honest answer or the bullshit one?”

“Preferably? Honest. Though, I’d love to hear the bullshit one if you’re willing.”

“It seemed fun.”

You share a look with Heizou for a moment, the tension in the air palpable until the both of you laugh. It was a ridiculous lie that’s for sure.

“Okay, now be honest with me. Why’d you join them? Is it at all related to what we’ve already discussed?”

“Pretty much. My brother took over as the head of the clan when my grandfather passed away. It was supposed to be my responsibility per his will, but my brother must have paid someone off to have the will altered.”

“Mmm, I understand now. That’s why you said “business” the way you did earlier. I was wondering about that.”

“Yeah. What my brother is doing is shitty to say the least. I know these are family affairs and they need to be “dealt with in the clan” as some of the old timers would insist, but nothing can be done when the corruption runs as deep as it does.”

“That’s quite true. You’re rather passionate about this.”

Your eyes dart to the side for a moment, a hand idly fiddling with the pyro vision you wore on your neck. It always brought you comfort in times of uncertainty.

“I was raised to be the head of my clan, of course I’m passionate about it.”

“What happened the day you left?”

While you knew this question was bound to pop up, it still stung to hear. It took you a moment to ground yourself, but once you were calm, you looked back at the detective with weary eyes.

“It’s a long story.”

“That’s fine. We have all the time in the world.”

Heizou’s gaze was sincere as he watched you examine his face for any discrepancies, ones you’d never find as they weren’t there. It was completely reasonable given what you had been through thus far. Before you were given the chance to break the silence, Heizou had beaten you to it.

“Say, would you be okay with me taking notes? It’ll help the investigation by allowing us to make a timeline of what happened and who all was involved. If we’re gonna take these bastards down, we need an airtight case.”

“Isn’t that a little harsh?”

“Hardly~.”

A small smile spreads across your lips as you nod in agreement. Without really noticing it until now, most of the tension you had built up seemed to release itself through your slow breaths. You’d been on your own for so long now, it was nice to finally have a real ally on your side.

“Alright, I’m ready when you are Y/N.”

“Well, it started right after our grandfather’s funeral…”

Update Tags: @eraelia-alberich @elliegl @mc-park @raeinn

Author's notes: Thank you for reading chapter two!

Hi everyone! Long time no see!

I apologize that it took me FOUR MONTHS to finally get chapter two of this fanfic out. I had a lot of less than pleasant experiences in my personal life that lead to such a long hiatus. Thankfully though, I should be ready to go in posting more frequently. If not, know I will post at least once every four months !! haha...

That being said, four months has given me a lot of time to improve my writing skills! At least I hope!!

Again, I would love feedback if you have the time to spare!

If you'd like to be included in tag list for future updates, please sound off below!

Thank you again for your patience. Have a wonderful day and a happy new year!

#double agent fanfic #shikanoin heizou x y/n #heizou shikanoin x reader #heizou #shikanoin heizou #genshin impact fanfics #genshin impact #canon x reader #canon x y/n

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julietookoff · 1 year

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February 2023 Tour

So some of the maintenance we did on our 11 year old RV: replace part of a rotted slide-out floor, paint the yellowed ceiling fixtures, get front seat covers, a new driver’s side window, install a microwave over-the-stove, replace the 2 house batteries, "new" mattress and just scrub and touch-up everything. We took it to Henkel's RV Sales August 9, knowing it was off-season for RV sales. . . it is still there! We were hoping it would sell around the time of the big RV show in Tampa, but that's been a few weeks ago. . . It’s still in good shape; as Shorty said, “Nobody’s got any money now.”

Closing on our house was July 22, 2022. We found a G.E. dishwasher at an outlet store in Clearwater, a G.E. stove at an estate sale, and fridge, washer and dryer at Lowe's. By the time we got the mattresses, shower curtains, and things you need to live, our first night in the house was July 29. We still had to commute to Holiday to finish working on the RV at our tired senior pace. We decided we're going to die here, because we're too old to move again. . . we were so worn out. But dang, we're loving it here!

We continued commuting (about 35 miles each way) to see Shorty most weeks; a few times he came up to see us at the house.

The first two things I cooked in the new house were sheet pan chicken/taters/ corn on the cob and chicken parm on the sheet pan. After 10 years with an RV oven, I had a heuge two-shelfer and two giant sheet pans I had been dying to use. I had been collecting recipes from Julia Pacheco, my fav You-Tube home cook, for about a year. To Corny's (and Bob's) delight, I have been cooking up a storm! I also started a little canning. I have wanted sodium-free beans for a long time - and the pressure canner takes them from dried, right outta the bag to squishy soft in 40 minutes.

^stuffed Manicotti

Corny watched and I re-watched Breaking Bad on one of the many TVs we've found in storage auctions. This one came with a guest subscription to Netflix. We watched "Better Call Saul". He was Corny's favorite character. I've always loved Bryan Cranston. Then we watched all the Jurassic Park movies.

Here's a little tour. The walls are a very light grey; flooring is grey vinyl:

^This is where I have my oatmeal with Piggie and Poco

Master bed and bath:

Life of Christ cross - all the little boxes were delivered to Shorty's house over the past year and accumulated in storage. It was like Christmas, opening them all up and displaying them!

Bedroom 1, Den and bath 2:

Poco got a cute little 2' fence surrounding the patio. Corny doesn't worry so much about him wandering away now.

Backyard visitors: flock of 6 wild turkeys, pond turtle

Fledgling woodpecker chatted with me and clung to my leg for several minutes when I went to pick up my bedside dresser.

Without gutters yet, when hurricane Ian headed our way in September, we made two trips to a county park to fill sandbags. Some young, energetic people took pity on us old, slow-moving, moaning people and helped us haul the heavy bags to the Jeep. Corny made a few bucks selling flashlights and lanterns he had gotten on clearance months ago, thanks to Ian.

In November I did a big 2-week Georgia county run. I only got the Jeep stuck once, in mud covered by leaves. A Lumpkin County Sheriff had me out within minutes. I have about 1/3 of GA counties to visit:

On Thanksgiving Shorty brought Bob up to the house. They arrived at 5pm; the turkey finished at 7:30pm. I made real gravy for the first time in decades.

Corny had some kidney procedures in November, then found himself in the hospital for an infection in December.

Shorty told us on Dec. 1 he was moving "up north". He heard rumors that Hyundai was hiring contractors to do his job so he promptly took his 3 weeks vacation. When he went back to see if he was on the schedule, they were like "Who are you?". He had worked there 10 1/2 years. We were so glad they did what we couldn't - kick him in the pants so he would get a better job. The little shit decided to move to Elkhart, Indiana to be able to afford a house of his own. We miss him - my life has certainly changed. I would plan all week what to bring him or ask him or tell him. But we are very happy for him to be out on his own and experiencing real freedom for the first time. He left for Elkhart Dec. 3 so now we just text.

We didn't have much notice, so Christmas was basically cancelled. We went to Buffet City on Christmas Eve. I made 4# of candied pecans to send up north and give to the neighbors and Liam - Shiloh Builders' Number Two. They are building a house right next door which Chick, the owner of Shiloh, is going to live in part time. They are using the garage as their office.

I threw a tapestry over the TV for Christmas.

Corny scored a home run and got me a Kitchen Aid accessory that peels, cores and slices an apple all at the same time! I made my first apple pie since I was 20-something years old. I was always too impatient to peel apples.

We continue going to storage auctions. The latest score was an entire tub of Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokemon cards. I went through them all to check for the big buck$ cards. There weren't any. When I get back from BamaRama (GC9TB1Z) I will list them on Facebook Marketplace for prolly $20/box.

Life is Godd!

We fit out.

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asmosaysso · 2 years

Text

Mammon one shot ,,,,

Mammon takes his “abilities”, and uses them to allow you to have a wonderful birthday. SFW LOL *LOTS OF FLUFF*, No NSFW, meantion of the first time MC met mammon (and his intro), Some change in the lore for the sake of this story. Mammon was struggling to get you a present. He handles money horribly, as you know, but had a severe problem when buying you something. For the last few years, he got jobs and helped the witches for money to spend on you, but he only now realized there was an easier way to do this.“Oi, Y/N?“ Mammon calls through your bedroom door.“Yeah?“ You call back, “Come in!“Mammon walks in with a grin on his face. “How are ya doin’?” He asks, almost teasingly, knowing *you* know there's a reason he came to your room.“I’m good...“ You say, your eyes narrowing, wondering if he's going to use you to hide from Lucifer.Mammon's grin widens as he walks up to you (sitting on the floor) and stands above you, “So you know yer birthday’s comin’ up, right?“You’re immediately confused. You had thought Mammon's‘ save-up-and-spend-out’ plans for your birthday were a tradition. “Yeah?““I figured somethin’ out...“ He sits down, moving what you were doing out of the way so you’re almost nose to nose.“What is it?“ You were curious, but dragging out things like this annoyed you. If it was something important, like you two would stay in for your birthday, you needed to know.“Well, ya like spendin’ money, and so do I. I figured out a way to make it easier though. But I’ve gotta do somethin’ and I won't be able to be around for the day before your birthday.“You pause, contemplating what he was saying. “So you won't have to work super hard, but you’ll still be away?” You ask.“Yeah. I have somethin’ to do before I can celebrate yer birthday with you.“This ultimately saddens you. You and Mammon normally try to stay together for the days around your birthday. You don't understand what could be more important than just being around him. “When will it be done?““By bedtime, but that doesn't matter. Anyways, aren't ya going to ask me what I realized?“ Mammon grins at your pouting face, sure that whatever he has to say will cheer you up.“What did you realize, Mammon?“ You tilt your head to the side, and Mammon takes your dominant hand.You feel something rectangular and thin in your hand, and immediately realize what it is after playing around with Mammons when you would have mini-fights.“A credit card?“ You ask. “What would this do?“Mammon grins even wider after realizing he gets to explain what is so important.”Don't you remember when we had to steal Goldie back you found that check?”“Yeah, it was for a bunch of grim.““And when we would go out and about you’d always find money around?““Yes...““If we go out an we’re on super good terms, ya end up with money Y/N! How haven't ya realized this yet?“ Mammon says, looking like a happy puppy.“Oh! So I’d pretty much accumulate money! OHH!!“ You grin back at Mammon, happy he doesn't have to work his ass off for your birthday this year.“Go out with Asmo or Beel and go walk around or something and test it out. Normally I wouldn't pass a chance to be with ya, but I have to do something first. I am the Great Mammon, after all, I’ve never been away for any other reason.“You contemplate this, still sad you wouldn't spend tomorrow with Mammon before your birthday, but it was overall fine with you as long as Mammon wouldn't be overworked.“Alright!“ You say, jumping up, equally as happy as Mammon.It was finally your birthday. You did get to cuddle with Mammon up until midnight so he was the first to tell you happy birthday, and you had woken up in his arms a couple of hours ago. You had immediately gotten up to be showered in kisses and happy birthdays from him, gotten ready, and figured out Mammon’s method worked!You were beyond happy, and Mammon took you around all of the shops in the Devildom to spend your Grimm. When the day finally got to later hours, he told you that you were going somewhere.“Where though?“ You asked, only to be met with a blindfold.“This isn't necessary, but I thought it would be more interesting for ya.“ Mammon says, leading you away.“I guess... but where are we going Mammon?““Just wait and hush. The Great Mammon would never let anything happen to ya, so just wait.“You decide to listen to him, knowing he does care.After about ten minutes of walking, he finally counts to three and removes the blindfold to reveal a beautiful flower garden, where he hands you one final present he hid from you.“Open it.““...Alright...“ You say, taking the present into your hands.“C’mon now! Yer taking forever!“You look at Mammon and smile, “Is it that important?” You laugh.He grins at you and nods, “C’mon and open it, Y/N!”You laugh and open the present faster, and it reveals a box. You open it slowly, relishing Mammon’s smile and anticipation.The box reveals a beautiful golden necklace, and Mammon takes the box from you and puts the necklace on you.“You know, Y/N. I’ve always thought Goldie was the most important thing to me. But ya came along and everything's changed. I love ya Y/N.“

#obey me #mammon #mammon avatar of greed #shall we date mammon #obey me mammon #obey me shall we date #obey me one master to rule them all #mammon obey me

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feralgoblinchild · 2 years

Text

Fun facts that SUCK about chronic illness:

I have POTS-Postural Orthoststic Tachycardia Syndrome among other issues, but the POTS makes me pass out and makes me feel like I'm about to pass out. It also flares up REALLY bad if I have to miss my antidepressants (I can't afford $188/month for that AND another $188/month for my heart meds so sometimes I don't get to take either unless my mom covers the cost for me right now). Chronic illness is EXPENSIVE!!!!!!! This doesn't include medical debt I've accumulated. Thats literally just two of my medications monthly cost right now. Insurance systems don't work. They make people even more sick.

With antidepressant withdrawals, mine makes me violently vomit. One day when I was JUST BARELY able to not vomit all over all the surfaces in my work, one of my coworkers asked how I was doing on my lunch. I was honest and explained how shitty I felt. He said he meant it as a compliment, but you can't tell that in feeling bad at all. We learn to mask disability and illness because its so much easier than explaining to every customer or patient that you're chronically ill and drinking more water or meditating will not cure your neurological dysfunction. No matter how well meaning they are. We can be at an 8 or a 9 on a feeling shitty scale and a good percentage of people may not be able to tell. I've worked through passing out multiple times in a shift. No one would have known if it hadn't happened in the middle of a case or I hadn't told them. Couldn't move the next day, but I worked through it.

We have to be so obnoxiously careful to not overextended ourselves or we pay for it the next day/later that day. I take too hot a shower and I can't sleep for hours because of the palpitations. I forget my compression socks my head might become a fishbowl on a merry-go-round. I don't get to take my meds, I feel like I can't catch my breath. I let myself overheat, I hit the ground. But we've learned that we have limits, and we're constantly fine tuning those limits. Sometimes we push past it for one reason or another, but we'll always pay for it when we do.

I can't afford basic medical care. The US has an excessively flawed system. I literally can't afford medications to make me not pass out. I have to have help from my parents when I'm almost 30 just to afford my medical bills. And this isn't even doctors appointments. We CANNOT continue to allow this country to run healthcare on insurance. It's damn well past time for socialized healthcare. It took me a fucking year to get in to see my dysautonomia specialist, so don't you DARE tell me ITS gonna make it sO mUcH lOnGeR tO wAiT NOT THAT MUCH LONGER BUDDY IT TOOK 2-3 YEARS FROM WHEN MY AYMOTOMA GOT BAD ENOUGH TO SEEK MEDICAL CARE TO THE TESTING TO DIAGNOSE IT. TWO TO THREE YEARS OF MY LIFE LIFING WITHIUT A DIAGNOSIS TO AN ILLNESS THAT TOOK ME OUT OF MY DREAM JOB, ENTIRELY OUT OF MY FIELD, AND LEFT ME SCRAMBLING TO FIND ANY JOB I COULD PHYSICALLY DO

And I'm one of the lucky ones. I'm able to stand up to work sometimes. I'm able to enjoy active activities if I've spent enough time resting. I'm not entirely reliant on my wheelchair. I have a doctor who cared enough to get me a parking placard. I made enough money in my dream job to start looking into what was going on. My parents make enough money to help me. I'm LUCKY over here with my life falling apart in so many ways. There are people who can't even afford a diagnosis to take to a disability hearing, but disability will be damned if you don't have a diagnosis.

Disabled and chronically ill people struggle on the daily, regardless of government's decision on their disability, regardless of the degree of their illness. We fight tooth and nail and claw and every last possible tool we can find, down to the last dirt clod we can throw. If you're dealing with any disability or chronic illness, no matter the extent, no matter the type, know you're strong just for being here right now, even if scrolling on Tumblr is all you could manage today. Ita hard as hell dealing with this crap. And you're fighting every day to stay here. That's hardcore if I've ever seen it

#chronic illness #disability #disability pride month #my queer disabled ass over here SICK AS FUCK OF THE WAY THIS COUNTRY TREATS US

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