#Like most of what we gather from his relationship with his family is very show don’t tell | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bengiyo · 9 months

Text

The Knowing: Being Queer in BL

I’ve been talking about The Knowing a lot lately with @lurkingshan @waitmyturtles @ginnymoonbeam and @shortpplfedup and so I felt it was time to gather all those thoughts into one place.

I define The Knowing as “growing up and suffering with the knowledge that you are queer (specifically that you are not like other kids) and understanding that you must keep that knowledge to yourself.”

Part of what initially drew me to BL was how often many of these shows took place in what @absolutebl calls “The Bubble” where cultural and structural homophobia is less prevalent or nonexistent. Many of these stories are about guys learning something about themselves for the first time when it comes to being attracted to other men. However, I always find myself drawn to the characters that clearly Knew who they were a long time ago. What’s interesting about these characters is that many of them carry an intense sadness and loneliness that plagues them and their relationships.

I am in my mid-30s. I’ve had to unlearn a lot of language over the decades. When I first realized I was different from other kids I was eight years old. I was a lot like Chiron in Moonlight (2016) asking the question, “What’s a faggot?” I wish I’d had someone like Juan around to say, “A faggot is a word used to make gay people feel bad.” To which Chiron asked, “Am I a faggot?” and Juan quickly corrected. “Nah. You can be gay, but you ain’t gotta let nobody call you no faggot.” I know it’s hard for some of you to read slurs written out so plainly, but I grew up with them being part of the day-to-day language used by kids around me. If you instinctively recoiled at me typing the word four times, imagine experiencing that constantly for your entire adolescence while also fearing the consequences of being discovered by your peers. That’s what I survived. That’s what some of these boys survived.

Before I learned other words, I thought I was weird or broken. I knew I was drawn to boys before I even hit puberty, but I didn’t have language for existing on the ace-spectrum until I joined Tumblr in the early 2010s. Before that I just thought there was something wrong with me. When we see a character in BL who has clearly been gay for a long time, I find myself examining the environment around them to see if they suffered The Knowing.

The worst part of The Knowing is for the boys who can pass as straight if they try hard enough. I always talk about how I think femmes are stronger than those of us (like me) who can pass. They face the public scrutiny of being queer and the danger of that constantly. People like me often go unnoticed unless we’re amongst our peers or explicitly tell people who we are.

I’m writing this post as a love letter to the boys who suffered the Knowing. Sometimes these characters get a bad reputation in fandom for being boring or sad sacks, but they are the characters I love the most. I’d like to talk about some of my favorite boys who Knew. Unsurprisingly, the exact kind of melancholy Japan is willing to play with means they have strong presence on this list.

Korn (Until We Meet Again)

Korn is the character who began my discussion about this in a conversation with @wen-kexing-apologist about Kao’s acting. I pointed out that the saddest thing about Korn in Until We Meet Again is that he knew what he was going to do the entire time. The tragedy of UWMA is that Korn loved Intouch and let him in, and unfortunately learned that Intouch’s love couldn’t fix the horrors that plagued him. You can see it in Kao’s eyes for the entire show whenever we see the In and Korn flashbacks. He suffers under the weight of masculine expectation and crumbles.

The Entire Cast of What Did You Eat Yesterday?

WDYEY is all about characters who Knew. Kenji and Wataru may have been unable to pass and have chosen to accept who they are, but we know Wataru suffered for it because of his feelings about family. Shiro hid who he was for a very long time, and still hides it from most people. His trauma from The Knowing regularly threatens his relationship with Kenji. Kohinata also clearly knew who he was the entire time, and works diligently for the life he’s built for himself. So much of this show is about being gay in a world that does not value us.

Book, Christina, and Yok (Make It Right)

Book is actively victimized because of The Knowing. He left his previous school and doesn’t live with his family because he was outed by a past boyfriend, and is disowned after revenge porn of him is posted.

Both Chrstina and Yok are femme and cannot pass. Unlike many of the boys in this show figuring out who they are, they are trying to survive without losing themselves.

Li Ming (Moonlight Chicken)

Li Ming has a gay uncle and still suffers The Knowing. He is hiding his attraction from everyone until he develops feelings for Heart.

Itou Akira (Life: Love on the Line)

We experienced the entire arc of this man’s life and how much The Knowing crushed him. This is probably the most The Knowing character on the list.

Oumi Mitsuru (Eternal Yesterday)

Oumi has such a frank expression of The Knowing and how much it hurts that he likes Koichi but feels like he can’t express it.

Takahashi Satoru (Koisenu Futari)

The man literally blogs about The Knowing, and it’s how Sakuko began to understand herself. He has a questionnaire prepared to help you figure out how long you’ve Known.

Ren (Tokyo in April Is…)

I wrote multiple posts about Ren and his experience with The Knowing. So much of what goes wrong for them is because Ren couldn’t believe that Kazuma could like him, too, and he knowingly faced the consequences of being discovered to save Kazuma’s life.

Pete (Love by Chance)

Pete knows who he is and can’t change it. Trump uses this against him. Pete doesn’t want Ae to be gay like him and suffer with the realities of being a Known Gay. Pete has one of the first coming out scenes in BL that I really enjoyed.

Cairo (Gameboys)

Cairo was clearly struggling with Knowing, and his close friend took his coming out from him. Cairo is a brat, but goddamn do I appreciate some of his angst.

See-eiw (My Only 12%)

He watched The Love of Siam (2007) and had a complete emotional breakdown as he was finally able to name his feelings for Cake. Top-tier expression of The Knowing.

Shin (3 Will Be Free)

I mean, we don’t have to look much further than his entire sad existence and being pushed into sex with a prostitute in the first episode. Also there’s, “It wasn’t that you didn’t like boys. You just didn’t like me.” Shin is the only boy in BL-adjacent media to suffer a specific version of The Knowing: being rejected and discarded by your own people in a homophobic way so they could stay closeted.

Phupha (A Tale of Thousand Stars)

Phupha’s entire romantic angst is built around The Knowing and what others seeing him for who he is will do for him.

Pran (Bad Buddy)

Though Bad Buddy exists in The Bubble, Pran has one of the most painful versions of The Knowing I’ve ever experienced because his is wrapped up in family angst and an unrequited crush.

Lee Wan (Our Dating Sim)

Lee Wan suffered The Knowing and broke things with his best friend after confessing. The Knowing destroyed his ability to see a version of his life where he and Shin Kitae overcame the upcoming challenges together and so he takes that choice from Kitae. Crushing.

Ueda Minoru (Our Dining Table)

Minoru is so familiar with The Knowing that he preemptively breaks up with Yutaka after kissing him.

Kiyoi (My Beautiful Man)

The reveal that Kiyoi already knew who he was and noticed Hira the entire time? Beautiful. One of the best reveals in J-BL history.

Minato (Minato’s Laundromat)

This man is one of the sadder examples of The Knowing because he’s in a place where he understands who he is now, but the internalized homophobia cripples almost all of his romantic and closer relationships.

Han Baram (Sing My Crush)

This boy is suffering so much from The Knowing that his love confession song is literally titled “Letter of Apology.”

Oh-aew (I Told Sunset About You)

He Knew. “Are you proud of me?”

Noh Shinwoo and Shin Daon (Light On Me)

Noh Shinwoo clearly suffered The Knowing and was discovered. His bullies still plague him on the streets when they see him. Shin Daon was not surprised by his attraction to Woo Taekyung; he struggled with his parents expectations.

Nagisa (His: I Didn’t Mean to Fall in Love)

Nagisa definitely Knew who he was and was probably going to stay quiet about it until Shun showed up in his life. What upsets me so much about Nagisa is that he is the one who leaves Shun later in the movie after pulling queerness out of Shun.

The Secret Crush on You Quartet

All four of them get a spot on this list for The Knowing. Toh, Kaojao, and Daisy clearly suffered The Knowing, and Som has clearly taken care of them for a long time.

Rocky and Judah (Quaranthings)

I love that these two explore The Knowing from a class perspective. Judah is wealthier and eventually comes out, but Rocky is poor and struggles with it a lot longer.

Han Tae Joo and Kang Gook (Where Your Eyes Linger)

The Knowing, bodyguard edition. The yearning between the two of these is palpable. It hurts that they can’t even talk to each other about it.

Mafuyu (Given)

He Knew and lost his boyfriend to The Knowing.

Kim Dong Hee (Unintentional Love Story)

He won’t acknowledge Go Ho Tae’s feelings because he feels a sense of loyalty to Ho Tae’s mom for taking care of him after his parents disowned him over the gay thing. Huge case of The Knowing.

Edit: New Additions October 7, 2023.

Nekoyashiki Mamoru (Kabe-Koji Nekoyashiki-kun Desires to be Recognized)

He describes a textbook case of the Knowing and finding community at the convention.

Zo (Hidden Agenda)

He definitely Knew, and got messed over by his friends badly for it.

Yuuki (Me, My Husband, and My Husband's Boyfriend)

We almost lost Yuuki to the Knowing.

All of the Eclipse Gays

Literally all of them. The entire show is about how fascism turns queer people into agents working against their own community.

Joe (The Warp Effect)

He clearly Knew before his encounter with Army, and he also suffered for being outed.

#Ben writes #The Knowing #too many shows to tag #what did you eat yesterday?#until we meet again #bl series #thai bl #japanese bl #korean bl #filipino bl

491 notes · View notes

eternalsams · 1 year

Text

Paint It Black ⇴ J.Seresin

pairing: Jake Seresin x fem!reader

summary: you didn’t want to get married, you didn’t need a ring to prove your love for your man. But when the circumstances want you to, you’re forced to tie the knot with Jake to stay with him. And you’re scared your soon-to-be-husband won’t agree with your only request.

warnings: none, only pure fluff

word count: 1 147

a/n: english isn’t my mother tongue, please take it into your consideration :)

masterlist

“Baby, you’re sure?” Jake frowns.

“Yes, Jake, I want it like that. But I know you like classic things so if you don’t want to, then we don’t do it. I don’t want you to feel forced to do it.”

“I'm not feeling forced to do anything with you, baby. I just know that this is big, even for us.” He tries to give you a reassuring smile.

“We’re known for doing big.” You give him a quick look.

“Then, let’s go. We’re doing it.”

The wet noise echoes in the room, making you wince.

“Oh my God, we’re doing it.” Jake groans.

The white fabric of your weeding dress drowning in the black dyed water. You drop it entirely into the hot water and takes a metal spoon to stir everything. When you started dating Jake five years ago, you didn’t want to get married, that wasn’t in your plans. Not that you didn’t love Jake, you loved him with your entire being and told him the three little words for your 3 month anniversary. You talked about it with him and first he tried to convince you that eventually you’d change your mind but after a long conversation, he stopped trying and accepted the fact that you didn’t want to get married.

You’ve been happy together for five years, until Admiral Simpson announced you that you had been deployed. In more than five years, you’d stayed at San Diego and it was great. You met lots of friends and, even better, you met the love of your life. Simpson gave you two weeks to pack your things and leave the west coast. When you told Jake about your deployment, he had been silent for multiple minutes and left the room to go to your shared bedroom. You feared he would call it quit and leave you alone after five years together. But he didn’t. He came back with a tiny bag in his hands. He gave it to you and sat down on the couch in front of you, waiting for you to open it. You rapidly looked up at him through your lashes and started undoing the knot. A silver ring fell in the palm of your hand and you looked up at Jake.

“What’s this?” You asked.

“I don’t want to stay away from you. I don’t like distance and I’m pretty sure a long-distance relationship with you will drive me crazy and you’ll have to check me into a mental hospital.”

“Jake...” You stared at the beautiful ring in your hand.

“I know what you think of marriage and I wouldn’t ask you that if there was another solution but-”

“Okay, let’s do it. Let’s get married.” You nodded your head and slipped the ring on your finger.

Jake jumped from the couch to take you in his arms and hold you as close as possible. You couldn’t contain the giggles as he peppered your face with kisses.

“Now the most important question. Since when do you have that ring hidden in our room, Mr Seresin?” You took his face between your hands.

So here you are, watching the water dye the wedding dress your mother got you two days ago. You told Jake about your desire to get married in black and, first, he didn’t agree. He came from a very religious family and when you told him you wanted a black dress, the only thing he saw was a funeral. The wedding was supposed to be white. But you eventually convinced him by showing him gorgeous black wedding dresses on pinterest and he couldn’t wait and see you in yours. Second obstacle; the budget. When you saw how expensive black wedding dresses were, you almost had a heart attack. You could never gather that amount of money when the wedding was in a week. So you decided to get a white one and take the risk to dye it. The wedding was in five days and you couldn’t afford for another dress. Even if Jake told you he would get you ten more dresses if you asked him, you didn’t want him to spent his money because of your mistake.

“And now we wait.” You say as Jake wraps his arm around your shoulders.

Today was the wedding day and you and Jake haven’t told anybody about your dress. You knew your friends wouldn’t care less if your dress was white, black or even rainbow colored. But you knew your and Jake’s families would have a hard time accepting your choice. But it wasn’t their wedding, it was yours. They should be glad you accepted to get married and don’t judge your tastes. So you were in the small room, smoothing the lace parts of your dress. It’s was just beautiful. The black dyeing worked perfectly and even if you had to dip it twice, the results were better than what you had expected. Jake only saw the dress when you got it out of the water the first time, the time it turned out to be more blue-ish than black. You asked him to trust you and he did. He didn’t ask any more questions and trusted you when you told him the second dyeing was perfect.

Phoenix is just behind you and can’t stop taking pictures on her phone to send it to Rooster who’s with Jake. Of course, Bradley doesn’t show the pictures to your fiancé, he only teases him by saying you look more beautiful than ever and Jake swears to God that if his wingman doesn’t shut up, he’s gonna rip his tongue out and make him eat it. Only your close friends and your families have been invited to the wedding due to the early convening and it was clearly enough for the both of you.

When the time of you walking down the aisle finally come, Jake can’t stay still, his feet refuse to stop taping against the tile on the floor of the small church you found. His gaze is locked on his cufflinks and when the music you chose for your entrance starts to play, he immediately looks up at the doors. They open and you appear. More magnificent than ever, just like Bradshaw has said. He is so mesmerized by your beauty that he can’t see your and his families whispering in the rows, either complimenting your dress or finding it completely out of place. But neither of you care about what the others think. How could he ever think black was a funeral color? You look ravishing in your dress and he already know the pictures are going to be unforgettable. You look like one of those characters straight out of a Tim Burton movie. You were his lovely and splendid bride. You reach him and take the hand he hold out to you.

“You look... perfect.” He breathes out with a shy smile.

“Told you it was a good idea.”

“The best idea ever.” He says as he kisses your knuckles.

#hangman x reader #jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x reader #hangman #jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #top gun #top gun: maverick #top gun x reader #top gun maverick x reader

1K notes · View notes

letaliabane · 2 years

Text

Caged

on the night of rhaenyra’s wedding, the tension is high between the broken bond of two former lovers. with jealousy brewing, will they fall back into each others arms?

genre: angst, major smut +18!, major jealousy themes throughout, make up desperate sex, slight choking and a spank or two, fluff towards the end

You could feel someone watching you keenly from the corner of the room. More like glaring if anyone took notice of the deep frown, furrow of his brow and clenched jaw as you mingled with the hundreds of guests gathered for Rhaenyra’s wedding.

‘Your lover seems most perturbed this evening Y/N.’

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes towards Laenor Velaryon who came to your side, the man who was to be Rhaenyra’s husband.

Having grown up with the Princess meant you knew the Prince well, visiting often with the rest of his family. And he was one of the very few people who knew about your relationship to the Commander of the city watch, and also about its untimely end.

You glanced towards the Commander. He looked absolutely sinful.

Dressed in dark navy blue, wild curls pulled back to allow his features to be accentuated beautifully by the candlelight that danced around the room.

If you had your way you would’ve dragged him out of the room and showed him who he truly belonged to. He had been on his knees for you before.

But the woman now hanging off of him let that thought burn away from your mind. She was trying to grab his attention, breasts barely covered by her low hanging dress.

You scoffed.

‘I couldn’t less about how he feels. And you know very well he isn’t mine, not anymore.’

The Prince raised his eyebrow, glancing between you and the man on the opposite side of the room who had his eyes locked on you, clearly ignoring the desperate woman beside him who was losing her patience.

‘Jealousy certainly isn’t your colour Y/N,’ He said before drinking the last of his wine. After placing the goblet down he stretched out his hand towards you with a bow, nodding towards the many of the guests who were dancing. ‘But why don’t we give him a show on what he’s missing.’

You couldn’t help laugh, throwing back the rest of your drink, barely savouring the rich bitter flavour before taking his hand, allowing him to lead you through the crowd.

Very soon, Laenor and you had enraptured many of the guests, twirling and dipping to the beat that was played by the talented musicians before continuing to switch partners.

You were so caught up in the moment, in the sudden happiness you felt, that you hadn’t bothered to look over to the corner of the room.

You couldn’t help but laugh, earning a fast twirl from a tall gentleman whose name you failed to remember, only to find yourself in a very familiar embrace, arms wrapping around your waist, hands spread across your back.

Looking up to meet blue grey-hued eyes, those of which belonged to you former lover, faces mere inches from one another. You pulled away, dropping briefly into a low curtsey.

‘Ser Harwin.’

‘Princess Y/N.’

He bowed his head before taking your hand into his, guiding you in the next dance.

You felt magnetised to him unable to break your gaze as you circled one another, hands meeting before he spun you, pulling your back against his chest.

The room slowly faded from existence, and it was almost like old times. How he’d sneak you out an dance with you under the stars, humming a deep but soothing tune, your head rested against his chest—

‘How are you my lady?’

You shivered, feeling his lips pressed against your ear, his beard prickling your skin, daring to press an almost kiss just behind your earlobe

‘I’m fine.’

You despised the break in your voice, the hurt that dripped from them. Harwin held you a moment longer before letting you unravel from him, keeping ahold of your waist as you once more circled each other.

‘I wish I could believe that was true. But I know your are anything but fine.’

‘And what makes you think you know me?’

‘Oh I know you very well my lady, so much that I knew you would try to test me tonight.’

Your eyes flew to him, annoyance rushing back to replace the hurt.

‘Who had a woman hanging off his shoulder. Bet you copped a good feel while you had the chance didn’t you Commander?’

Shaking your head, you turned to leave.

‘Do you think it’s easy for me?’ You heard him mutter through gritted teeth behind you, ‘You think its enjoyable to watch you dance with every brute here with their filthy hands all over you?‘

‘You are the one who ended things between us!’ You hissed, twirling to face him head on, the fabric of your gown caressing his body, ‘You who dropped me at a moments notice and became infatuated with others! You didn’t even fight for us-’

Harwin’s hands suddenly grasped your face causing a moan to leave your lips unwillingly, thank the seven hells for the music and the stamping of feet thrumming throughout the hall.

You wanted to pull away, to look away but it was like his gaze had you in a trance, neck straining as you looked up at him.

‘I would’ve burned a thousand times over for you Y/N. I still would,’ His voice rough as whispered heatedly, his lips caressing yours, ‘I did what was best for you.’

An overwhelming wave of emotion rolled over you, tears springing to your eyes before corroding into a deep rage.

With all your might you shoved him away from you, his hands falling away from your face.

Though he barely moved a muscle, a flash of hurt crossed his eyes. He hated being the source of your sadness. Even with the thundering of drums he heard your cry, tears running down your cheeks.

‘You had no right to decide whats best for me Harwin!’

Before he could move towards you, you slipped into the crowd, weaving through the mass of bodies, escaping his sight at the top of the stairs.

Slamming the door to your quarters, you quickly removed the suffocating gown, unable to handle the heat and heaviness of the uncomfortable material any longer.

Your breath heaved, rushing to undo the bindings of the corset, almost an awful remind of the burden you carried.

A bound princess unable to follow as her heart wishes.

The dress fell from your body, landing onto the marble floor leaving you bare before the roaring flames within the fireplace. Just when you pulled your shift over your head, the loud rapping of knuckles knocking interrupted the silence.

But the pattern of the knock made you look back to the door. A secret knock you knew all too well.

Your feet padded against the floor before you found yourself in front of the door, hand hovering hesitantly over the golden handle. Deep down the hurt still crept, the anger and sadness, and if you opened the door, you knew that would all pour out, perhaps in the worst way.

With a deep breath, you threw the door open only for Harwin to push forward fast, pressing his lips firmly against yours slamming the door behind him with his foot.

For a brief moment slam your fists against his chest but as he presses kisses to the corner of your mouth you couldn’t help but pull him closer, moaning as his tongue slipped into your mouth.

‘I hate you,’ You growled against his mouth when he finally pulled away, tears stinging your eyelashes.

Harwin couldn’t help but chuckle softly, resting his forehead against yours gently, his hand cupping your cheek. You noticed his eyes were misty, the sadness evident.

‘Do you really?’

Your heart broke at the mere whisper. You wanted to say yes, with your whole chest. But you couldn’t.

Closing your eyes you leant into the warmth of his roughened palm, humming in content as his thumb caressed your cheek. Opening your eyes once more, you looked up at him.

‘I could never hate you.’

His smile was gentle, eyes roaming your face, reacquainting himself with all the things he loved about you. Tipping your chin up, he nuzzled his nose against yours before pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

Exchanging brief but loving pecks before it turned heated once more. He gripped your hair, tipping your head back so he could tease your neck with his lips, smirking at the sounds that left you as he marked his territory before sucking at your weak spot.

Moaning, you ran your own hand through his hair, ripping the tie from it and letting it flying somewhere across the room, letting your nails drag over his scalp.

Harwin growled against your collarbone, leaning up once more to smash his lips against yours messily. Suddenly you pulled away from him, stepping backwards when he tried to grab for you, causing his eyebrows to furrow even as you gave him a wicked smile.

‘Take your clothes off Harwin, now.’

He moaned unashamedly, and you couldn’t help but giggle, trying to retain your sensual stance.

The man that was known throughout the kingdom as ‘Breakbones,’ one of the strongest men, keeled at the likes of you.

Slowly he pulled the blue material over his head, tossing it into a corner of the room. His hands trailed down his toned scarred chest, unbuckling his pants. It was his turn to smirk, watching you bite your lip hard, legs pressed together at the sight of his cock.

He paced over to you, his fierce kiss making you spellbound. So much that you didn’t notice how he bent down to easily pick you up with one arm, bringing your legs around his naked hips and never letting his lips part from yours. He made his way to the classic chaise, sitting down to have you straddling his lap.

You wrapped your arms around Harwin’s neck, feeling the rise of his cock against your inner thighs. Smiling against his lips, dropping your hips lower, you rolled your hips against his.

His head fell back with a moan, eyes closing as the pleasure coarsed through him, large hands trailing to squeeze your ass. Immediately you took the chance to kiss and lick down his neck teasingly, marking his skin just like he had to yours just moments before, continuing to roll your hips.

While you were distracted, Harwin gripped the top of your shift, your moan and the loud shriek of tearing cotton music to his ears. Your breasts spilt out from the shreds of material that fell to cradle your hips before he let it fall to the floor. He leant up, wrapping his mouth against your nipple, his other hand giving the other a squeeze.

‘Oh Gods!’ You cried, eyes rolling back.

Even though the entire castle was at the wedding feast the possibilities of stragglers passing by sent heat straight to your core.

The pleasure became unbearable, the swing of your hips and Harwin’s mouth already setting you on edge. With a weak sob you grabbed his head, pulling his face up to kiss him. You groaned into each others mouths, your naked chests pressed against each other tightly.

Harwin looked up at you, both hands cupping your face. His eyes roamed from your face down your entire body with a loving smile, shaking his head.

‘Your so beautiful.’

Out of all the colourful phrases he had every whispered to you, that made you bashful. You dipped your head away from his intense gaze, smiling as he chuckled.

When your eyes returned to his, you noticed they had darkened, and once more you fell under his spell.

Slipping your hand down between you both, you grabbed his cock, causing him to hiss. You pumped him in your hand, watching his expression and smirking as he whimpered, evidently trying to hold back his noises,

Grazing your nose against his, you stared into his eyes as you lifted your hips and manoeuvred his cock beneath you, allowing it to notch at your entrance before ever so slowly sinking down.

You moaned loudly into Harwin’s mouth who breathed heavily, gripping the cushion hard he was afraid it would rip beneath his grasp. Your eyes threatened to close at the familiar pressure that filled you, savouring it. It had been so long, so so long.

‘Are you okay?’

You nodded as Harwin whispered, pressing a tender kiss to his upper lip in reassurance.

His arms wrapped around you, removing any fraction of space between your bodies. And slowly, you began to move your hips once more, exchanging mere whispers of moans and gasps.

But when the pleasure began to build, the emotions began to gallop within your heart and mind. The anger, the sadness, the hurt from all the months of separation.

The very memory of Harwin, in all his glory and decorated armour, leaving you at the gates of the Red Keep tore through your mind. The words ‘I never loved you’ ringing in your ears.

He may have done what was best for you, and you loved him for it, but no one ever could tame a dragon even if they tried.

Harwin’s eyes flew open as he was shoved back against the corner of the lounge, staring up at you. Your face was an expression he was very familiar with that was anything other than pleasure.

'Y/N-'

But as he went to sit up, your hand shot to his throat, your grip firm. Not to hurt (as if you even could), but to show him you were in charge, and you could see that he knew it too, sinking back into the velvet cushions.

In that moment you were an absolute vision to revel in, sweat dazzling your skin, the fire behind silhouetting your body like a goddess.

And just like that you began to swivel your hips once more; deliciously slow, eyes never leaving his. You watched as his abs tensed, face scrunched in desperation and pleasure.

You growled. ��Your mine Harwin Strong, and only mine.’

He nodded but you tighten your grip, turning his face to look you in the eye. ‘Say it, I want to hear you say it!’

‘I’m yours my love—I’ve always been yours!’ He gasped, dipping his head so he brushed his lips against the pads of your fingertips.

You keeled at his words, your breasts bouncing as you fastened your pace tenfold. Your hands fell to his chest, trailing against the scars that decorated his skin, nails digging into his chest causing him to roar, his hips lifting to meet your thrusts.

Your body faltered at the sudden pleasure that shot through your body, gasping and throwing your head back.

Harwin took the chance to sit up, his turn to grip your jaw. His expression was firm, voice a couple of octaves deeper, ‘And that means you are mine Princess.’

You cried as he thrusted upwards into you, smashing his lips against yours, swallowing your moans. And in a flash, he had you pressed into the velvet cushions of the chaise, one of his arms wrapped around your shoulders while the other held your bottom off of the lounge, continuing to thrust into you hard.

‘Your turn beloved,’ He heaved against your ear, his heated breath batting against your neck, unable to resist nibbling there teasingly. ‘Tell me who you fucking belong to.’

Even if you tried, you couldn’t speak, left incoherent by the pleasure that raked through you in waves, your nails digging deep into the wooden frame of the chaise.

A firm smack to your ass made you squeal, your whole body trembling, bringing your attention to the man over you who smirked down at you.

‘Speak up, I want to hear you!’

Tears spring to your eyes, the pleasure and emotions overwhelming you as you gasped desperately, trying to find your voice.

Your lover noticed immediately, leaning over to press sweet kisses across your face, whispering against your skin reminders that he was right there, that he was with you.

He wasn’t going anywhere.

‘I’m yours—I’m yours! Please Harwin I’m yours, I’m yours!’ You hoarsely cried, not caring who heard you.

You wanted everyone to know you were claimed. No one else could have you. No one except Harwin Strong.

‘Please please don’t stop, please!’

‘Never. I’ll never stop.’

He kissed your temple sweetly before trailing his lips down to yours, his kiss firm as he increased his thrusts. His arm around your back moved blindly before finding your hand, removing it from the wood before entangling your fingers together squeezing hard.

Your nails dug into his back, pulling him even closer. Every time he hits deeper, your eyes rolled back, chest heaving, your climax climbing closer and closer.

‘Come on Y/N, let go for me sweetheart, that’s it.’

The moment the praise leaves his lips, your whole body trembles violently and your pussy grips hard around Harwin’s cock.

You gasp into his neck when he slows briefly, only to return his thrusts harder, sloppily but faster than before. He threw his head back with a feral growl, teeth barred and eyes squeezed shut tightly.

Clasping his cheek, you bring his face back down to yours. You stare into his hooded eyes as his lips graze yours, foreheads pressed together.

Suddenly, his expression faltered and he moans loudly against your neck, his hips tightening and warmth enveloping your insides, whimpering as you were filled with his seed deep inside you.

Weak gasps leave your lips as Harwin continued to press into you with gentle thrusts, before finally he comes to a halt. Too overwhelmed to move you stay as you are, legs shaking around his hips, his hand still holding yours while the other comes up to cradle your head.

Even with the gentle fog that settles over your mind, you can’t help but dot kisses from behind his ear to his shoulder, caressing his back, the whimpers that leave him making you smile.

Moments, or maybe hours later, Harwin barely rolls to the side, most of his body still resting upon yours, hissing softly as his cock slips out of you, resting wet against your thigh.

Silence remained between you, his head tucked against your neck, nose nuzzling at your skin gently.

You whimpered as his fingertips suddenly danced across the skin of your cheek drawing a mindless pattern. You bit playfully at his thumb as it caressed your bruised lips. His deep chuckle reverberated against your chest.

You turned your head towards him with a tired smile, his hand trailing into your hair, bringing your face closer to his.

He brings your still entangled hands to his lips, kissing each knuckle ever so gently, still staring into your eyes. Gripping your hip, he slings your thigh over his hip once more as he rests on his back, bringing you to rest against him.

‘I love you Y/N.’

You smiled up at him, only realising tears were falling when his hand comes up to wipe them away. Leaning your body against his, you slowly press a kiss to his lips.

‘I love you Harwin,' You whispered just for him, running your hand through the hair that fell over his eyes.

You knew he loved you, but fear still dug deep into your heart like a knife. Staring into his eyes, you allowed your knuckles to caress his cheek.

'Please don't leave me again ...'

Harwin felt his heart tear at the quietness of your voice, and the vulnerability glazed in your eyes. He cupped your cheek, 'Never. I won't be making that mistake again.'

Pulling you in close, he pressed a firm kiss to your forehead before letting your head fall to rest against his chest. His hand drifted down your back, fingertips dancing comfortingly against your skin.

And once again, you felt whole.

harwin masterlist - masterlist

a/n: I have never spent this time writing a smut story, nor this nervous to release it! Hope the wait was worth it!

tagged (if your tag isn't working DM me and we'll try and fix it up!): @thesithdiaries @dazecrea @ppeuppeuppeu @a-sunflower-in-bloom @siren-of-the-deep-sea @ccallistata @agoldin @vivilingme-blog @my-dark-prince @derzauberermitlilabademantel @blooomsstuff @starxdame @alexslittlegirl @budugu @piper570 @noisyinfluencerstrawberry @words-way-of-life @m1tzifa1ry @gibbsgirl7 @b0xfullofdarkness @hueanhdang @criesinsagitarius @nicolewithanee @starxqt @ateliefloresdaprimavera @akilababs @lakamaa12 @iwillboilyourteeth @littlebirdgot @venus2eros @akinatrix @rainazinha @missusnora @hadesismybaby @b3nzeynep @rosemalachi

2K notes · View notes

talaok · 8 months

Note

Could you please write an imagine where Pedro and reader know each other for a very long time and reader comes from a not so happy family (unlike Pedro)

He’s in love with her and she does love him but does believe love is real or that relationships can last (thinking everyone only wants her for her body from past flings) and can’t give him a chance due to fear

Happy ending if you want

Thanks

warnings: angst, and brief talk about reader's bad childhood

a/n: im starting to honestly think yall should start writing fics, cause the shit you come up with is so good like

The first time you told him you were 13.

You had showed up at his doorsteps asking for a place to sleep.

You couldn't stand another minute of hearing your parents scream at each other two doors down.

They hadn't even noticed you were gone, they never did.

He was your only real friend at the time, and after a sort of awkward moment with his parents, he'd led you to his room and asked what had happened.

And that's the first time he heard the sentence he'd grow to hate.

"Love isn't real. It never lasts"

Your parents were the proof. Love is a trap, it deceives you into thinking you can spend your life with someone, when really, all you're doing is locking yourself into a cage, and when you finally realize what you've done, it will be too late, because then you'll be scared to get out, to start new, and that's why you'll stay, forever imprisoned because your own stupid choices.

From then on, it became your mantra.

With every guy who disappeared after having gotten you into bed, with every guy who dumped you as soon as they'd seen what's underneath your clothes, one sentence engraved itself in your mind.

Love isn't real. Love isn't real. Love isn't real.

And that's why, he, of all people, knew better than anyone why he shouldn't tell you, why he should continue pretending like he'd been doing for almost twenty years,

Maybe he was a masochist, or maybe his feelings were getting too strong and they had started to fog his brain, but he couldn't hold it in anymore, he'd kept it hidden for too long, and no matter how many women he'd meet there was always you in the back of his mind.

It had always been you.

And that's why tonight... tonight he had finally let go.

"Y/n, I love you"

He saw you freeze before his eyes, shocked and terrified of the words that had just come out of his mouth.

"I'm sorry" he murmured, swiping his sweaty hands on his jeans and looking around your living room to try and gather some composure. "I'm sorry to drop this on you like this. I know how you feel about the whole... love thing" he winced internally as his eyes set anywhere but on yours "And- and I don't want to ruin our friendship, and it's ok if you don't feel the same way, but..." He swallowed what felt like sand in his mouth as he finally looked into your eyes "Y/n I've felt this way for so fucking long" he breathed "I-I think I was too young to understand it when we met, but as we grew up it just became clearer and clearer and... and I couldn't do it anymore, I couldn't keep it to myself anymore y/n, I'm sorry"

His words felt distant, muffled.

You felt like you were drowning and he was trying to talk to you from above the water.

He'd just told you the three words you dreaded most in the world, and now you didn't know what to do, or say, or even think.

And it wasn't the same as when any of your old boyfriends had said it, no, with him, with Pedro, those words scared you because they meant so much more,

because they reached into that deep, hidden part of you that... that felt the same way.

And that part of you was hidden for a reason, that part of you was the only thing that prevented you from becoming like your mom, from falling into the trap.

And now he'd just handed you the keys, and all you needed to do was decide to open the lock.

And you didn't know if you wanted to.

"I don't want to lose you y/n, the last thing I want is to lose you, you- you're the most important person in my life, I-I'd be lost without you, so if you don't feel the same way, it's fine, I promise it's fine, I can take it, but before you say anything I just want you to know that when I say I love you I mean it," Both your hearts were beating faster than they'd ever beaten before"I mean I love every single part of you, every single inch, that I love you when you sing off-tune and I love you when you call me in the middle of the night" he laughed "That- that I wake up and go to sleep thinking of you- that without you I wouldn't know how to breathe, that since I met you, I felt the need to become a better person so that maybe I'd deserve you." he said more softly now "And I'm sorry about your parents, and I'm sorry about everything that happened in your life, but I promise you that I'd never do anything to hurt you, that if you just give me a chance, I'll try my hardest to prove to you that love is real, that- that it can last if you just give it a try"

The soft roar of an engine made its way to your ears as a car drove by outside, the fabric of the couch felt itchy all of a sudden, and your breathing had become uneven.

You didn't know how long you both stayed silent, how long it took you to take in all he had just said, but when you finally opened your mouth, your voice didn't sound like your own.

"Pedro-" his eyes were filled with hope, but yours only with pain "Pedro you know how I feel about this" you murmured, like doctors did just as they delivered bad news "I'm sorry I- I can't do this, you know I can't... I just-" there was this feeling in your stomach, like all your organs were twisting, like your body was telling you you were making a mistake "I don't want to lose you, and I know that if we did... this, it would only end badly" you watched all the hope in his eyes crumble and you didn't think you'd ever hated yourself more than in that exact moment.

"I'm sorry Pedro," you said "I can't"

He didn't look like himself anymore, he didn't feel like it either. He felt as if all the life had left his body, and all that remained was a useless sack of skin.

But still, still, he couldn't help but realize that you hadn't said one thing, the one thing that was gonna make him give up forever.

"So you don't feel the same way?"

It wasn't tears threatening to spill from your eyes, it was liquid pain, liquid hatred for yourself.

"T-that doesn't matter"

He frowned, trying to come up with something to say that wouldn't make him sound any more pathetic than he already was.

"B-but it does y/n. it does"

You swallowed thickly "Pedro, please" you begged

"I need to know," he said with a thread of voice

"I-I can't" you murmured, as a tear finally stained your cheek "I..."

He took that as his answer.

You didn't love him, and deep down, he'd always known.

"I think-" he cleared his throat to try and gain some composure, "I think it's best if I go," he said as he stood up.

you didn't know if you nodded, you didn't know anything anymore

He glanced back at you for a moment to see if there was any sign of you wanting to stop him, but your head was down.

both of your hearts broke with each step he took, and as he got farther and farther, this... feeling spread inside your body, this presentiment of having just made the biggest mistake of your life sneaked up your throat and robbed you of all oxygen.

And was only when his fingers grabbed the doorknob, and you grasped his arm, that you could breathe again.

"y/n-" he tried to speak, but you needed to do this before your mind could catch up, so you cut him off.

"I do," you said, as more tears fell from your eyes "I love you, Pedro"

His mind was a mess and his heart was a mess but he still managed to spit out a sentence

"Y/n, if you're saying that just because-"

"Pedro" you softly placed your hands on each side of his head, as you huffed out a silly laugh "Just kiss me"

295 notes · View notes

callsign-rogueone · 2 months

Text

part of the family - d.a.

Dain Aetos x marked!reader The marked ones have been your only family since your parents were executed — until now. [request] words: 3.7k 🏷: IRON FLAME SPOILERS. she/her afab reader in an established (but secret) relationship with Dain, descriptions of fainting and loss of vision, talk of contraceptives, periods, and pregnancy, you love Dain but he still has his problems (you’ll see), featuring bestie Bodhi (who is the captain of this ship lmao) and older (foster) bro Garrick. went totally overboard on this one but like. girl dad dain 🥺🥰

You slip into the meeting quietly, pressing yourself against the wall -- most assembly gatherings are open to any who wish to attend, but you’d rather them not know you’re here.

Xaden stands before the elders, in the thick of an argument that is very obviously about Dain.

“He’s clearly here as a spy. Why else would he side with us?”

You can’t hold back your response. “Because I showed him everything. Resson, Liam, the wyvern, the fliers, the dagger drops… all of it.”

So much for staying incognito. All heads turn to you, different emotions on their faces. Xaden looks as if you’ve stabbed him. Two of the elders look like they want to kill you where you stand. You can’t quite read the look on Brennan’s face.

“I say we confine her with him,” one says, eyeing you with contempt. “She is clearly a danger to the movement, if she was willing to take such a risk.”

You step forward to address them properly. “It was a calculated risk,” you say carefully. “Of all the marked Tyrrish, I am the one he trusts most. And I was prepared to kill him, had he not changed his mind about us.”

“Does he know that?” Xaden asks.

“No,” you answer, ashamed. You still don’t know if you could have gone through with it — could have lifted the dagger you’d held behind your back while he watched the last year’s events through your eyes and struck true, stopped the heart of the man you love.

Acid rises in your throat at the thought. You swallow it back down, continuing. “He may have hurt us in the past, but he was not raised as we were. A hundred others we brought with us can attest to the history that he was taught, the side of the story he was led to believe until I showed him otherwise.”

The assembly is silent.

You lower your head, unable to look at them. “Lock me up if you wish, kill me if you must. All I ask is that you spare his life.”

Brennan is the first to soften — he knows Dain, regarded him as a younger brother for years. That and the fact that you’re willing to die for the boy is evidence enough for him. “Very well. He may join the rest of us and keep his position as wingleader.”

Nobody dares to disagree with him.

“Thank you,” you say quietly. You bow to them, taking your leave.

It’s easy enough to swipe a plate of food from the kitchens, carrying it up to the room Dain has been locked in all weekend. The guard posted outside sees the mark on your arm, letting you enter without question.

At least two people in this fortress still trust you.

Dain’s head snaps up when the door opens, visibly relaxing as he sees it’s you.

You set the plate aside, moving to embrace him for the first time in days.

“Hi, my love,” he says softly, wrapping his arms around you.

“Hi,” you sniff, eyes watering.

You had told the assembly that you were prepared to kill him, but now that you’re in his arms, you know that you could never do anything to hurt him, no matter what he had decided.

Your tears are falling steadily now — you’ve cried nearly every day these last few weeks, constantly overwhelmed with emotion. You climb into his lap, needing him close.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” he soothes, resting his hand on the side of your neck and stroking his thumb over your pulse. This is the closest he’ll come to touching your face since the night he discovered his signet — save for the other day, when you’d taken his hand in yours and pressed it to your cheek, showing him everything.

You’d cracked open your heart for him, spread it onto the table and let him see it all, and he had stood and watched, seen the other side of the story. It had hurt him then, to realize that you’d hidden all of this from him for almost two years, but the warm saltwater dripping onto his hand had snapped him out of it quickly.

He wants to dry your tears again now, to brush them away with a gentle sweep of his finger, but he won’t cross that line with you again. He can’t.

“I love you,” he says softly.

“I love you too,” you answer, rubbing at your eyes with the back of your hand.

He shushes you softly, holding you closer. There’s a moment of calm quiet, the two of you just breathing each other in.

“I told them,” you say in a cracked whisper, unable to keep it from him any longer. “I told the assembly that I showed you everything.”

His eyes widen. “Why did you…?”

“I couldn’t stand silent while they talked about you that way. I convinced them that you are truly our ally, that it wasn’t your fault that you were taught only one side of the story.”

He leans down to rest his forehead against yours, your noses brushing. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” you reply. “For doing the right thing. I don’t think I could have bared to leave without you.”

He smiles softly. “I would follow you anywhere, my love.”

-------------------------------------------------------

You are so sick of this hike, and you aren’t even halfway done. For team-building, the leadership had said. Yeah, right. You feel like you’ve been herding a pack of wild animals all morning.

“If we press on for twenty minutes, there’s another flat section,” Bodhi explains, showing you the map that Brennan had given you.

You can’t hear the rest of his explanation through the ringing in your ears, the map blurring at the edges. You blink rapidly, trying to clear your vision, but it’s no use — the tiny black spots won’t go away.

“Hey,” Bodhi prods, waving a hand, “are you hearing me?”

“Give me a minute,” you pant, reaching out to touch the wall of rock behind you. Your legs feel too heavy, your upper body too light — your heart is racing, but the beats feel too shallow.

Something is wrong.

“You should sit,” he and your dragon offer at once.

You shift your left leg, moving to lower yourself to the ground, and the black spots grow until you can’t see anything. You lose the last of your balance, crumpling into the dirt.

Bodhi stops your head from hitting the rocks just in time.

-------------------------------------------------------

You don’t remember how you got here, nor much of the physical exam; don’t know if it took five minutes or an hour, but the healer is incredibly gentle with you; speaking softly, giving you water to drink and medicine to take, encouraging you to rest.

You shut your eyes, but you can’t bring yourself to sleep, not when the rest of your friends are still out climbing that mountain, crossing a trail littered with death traps.

“They’re doing just fine,” Cosa soothes. “They’ll be back faster if you sleep.”

You feel much better when you wake up.

The sun is starting to set. You must have been out for hours.

The healer comes back a few minutes later with Dain in tow. You reach for him instantly, relieved to see him in one piece. He stands at the side of the bed, wrapping an arm around you and letting you lean into his side.

“It could be a circulation issue, but since it hasn’t happened before, I’d say it was likely just dehydration and overexertion,” the healer explains.

That’s probably it. You were too busy making sure your section was moving quickly enough, that they were avoiding the traps and staying out of trouble. You’d spent your two rest breaks preventing the riders and fliers from coming to blows, having to physically restrain one of the first-years. Your jaw still aches from where you’d taken an elbow to the face in the process.

“There’s another thing,” she says, hesitating as she looks between you and Dain, appearing to debate if she can say this in front of him -- whatever it is, it clearly isn’t good.

Dain takes your hand in his, intertwining your fingers and looking up at her, waiting.

You nod in permission.

She overcomes her nerves, spitting it out. “You’re… expecting.”

The air in the room stills completely as you take in the information, the soft tick of the clock on the wall the only indication that time hasn’t frozen solid.

“I’ll give you two a minute,” she says quietly, darting out of the room and shutting the door behind her.

You still haven’t moved. You’ve forgotten how to speak.

“Breathe, love,” Dain soothes, rubbing your back. The warmth of his hand brings you out of your stunned haze.

You take in a lungful of air, letting it out slowly.

There’s no denying it, no pleading innocence or wondering how this could have possibly happened — it makes total sense, even through your dull headache and the fog still clouding your mind.

You’ve spent two nights a week in his bed for the last year and a half, and you haven’t had one cup of contraceptive tea since you arrived at Riorson house, or in the month before that either — you’d been out in the field every weekend for your third-year classes.

You’d missed a period or two, but you had chalked it up to the stress of your responsibilities as a section leader and the final straws that had led half the quadrant to desert with you. It would definitely not have been the first time that Basgiath had messed with your cycle; hardly any of the girls in your year got their period until after Threshing.

“Talk to me,” Dain coaxes quietly, looking at you with softness in his eyes.

“Why are you not freaking out right now?” You ask after a moment.

He manages a soft laugh. “I am, but I know you are too, and I’m more worried about you right now.”

You blow out a breath. “I don’t know how we’re gonna do this. None of our friends have kids. My parents are dead, and yours…”

“Have probably already disowned me for being here,” he finishes for you, shrugging, but you can tell it hurts.

“I’m so sorry,” you whisper, guilt tugging at you. Had he stayed behind, he would have been able to keep them, he’d still have the thing you’ve desired most for six years now.

But then you’d be completely alone in raising this child.

The thought sends a sharp spike of fear into your chest. You’ve already lost so many friends in your two years at Basgiath, and you’re headed straight for a war, fighting against dark magic that none of you really understand. What if Dain doesn’t make it through?

“We’ll figure it out,” he reassures you, “together.”

-------------------------------------------------------

Dain doesn’t leave your side all night, keeping one hand on you whenever he can. He treats you like a princess, going so far as to kneel down to lace your boots for you in the morning, despite your quiet insistence that you could do it yourself.

You’re prepared to resume your usual routine; strict professionalism by day, gentle words and soft touches after dark, but he takes your hand, walking down the hall with you to the mess for breakfast.

You get shocked looks from a few of your classmates, but it’s nice being able to be seen with him for once instead of keeping the two of you a secret. Not that you’d be able to for very much longer, anyway — two is quickly going to become three.

It takes all of five minutes for your friends to spot you.

“I called it!” Bodhi exclaims, elbowing Imogen.

“I already knew,” Imogen says, unamused.

You’re deathly still, heart racing.

Dain rests a hand on your lower back as he speaks. “Knew what?”

“About you two hooking up. Do you have any idea how many times you idiots have shown up to morning formation with your shoes untied, wearing each other’s knives?”

You laugh at her bluntness — you thought you’d been slick, always arriving to class five minutes apart and from different directions, avoiding eye contact at all costs… evidently not.

“You two look good together,” Bodhi decides. “It’s weird, but it’s cute.”

You sigh in relief. Bodhi is the one that you knew you could count on to be nice about this; the one you’ve wanted to tell about you and Dain for months now.

Dain blinks. “Why are you guys being so chill right now?”

“Do you not want me to be chill?” Imogen challenges, raising an eyebrow.

“No, I just… I was expecting the shovel talk. You know, the whole “I’ve got a sword and a shovel and I know how to use both” thing?”

“Oh, that’s Garrick’s job,” she supplies, almost too cheerfully. “And I think he’ll be a little more detailed than that.”

Dain pales, realizing that your foster brother likely won’t be as calm about this as your friends — and that there’s another very important thing that you’ll have to tell him, too.

You laugh, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Don’t worry, love. I’ll be there to hold him back.”

Imogen nearly gags at the sight, but straightens her face quickly enough. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Me too,” you respond, smiling for the first time this week.

Maybe this won’t go as terribly as you’d thought.

-------------------------------------------------------

Word travels fast in the rider’s quadrant.

Garrick approaches you in the main hall that afternoon.

You begin the speech you’d rehearsed in your head all morning. “I need to talk to you about something. I-”

He raises a hand, and you fall silent. “Bo already told me, and he made sure I was unarmed for this conversation.”

You let out a sigh of relief — he’s missing his two longswords and the array of daggers he normally keeps strapped to his body.

If you survive the next seven months, you’ll name Bodhi the kid’s godfather for this act alone.

You still place yourself in front of Dain as subtly as you can as Garrick starts a speech of his own.

“You’re an adult, and you can make your own decisions. It’s not my place to tell you what to do off the battlefield. Even if I did, I know you wouldn’t hear it. You’ve always been your own person; it’s one of the things I admire about you.”

You’re actually touched.

“Do you love him?” He asks, looking over at the wingleader, who has remained uncharacteristically silent, probably too terrified to speak.

“I do,” you answer, smiling softly. “I have for two years now.”

Garrick believes you.

It’s clear that the words pain him, but he says them anyway; “Welcome to the family, Aetos.”

Dain extends a hand to shake. “Thank you.”

Garrick takes it, gripping it hard enough to hurt as he tugs him forward, clapping his other hand onto the younger man’s shoulder. “Know that if you ever do anything to hurt her, you’ll be answering to me and me alone.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Dain says, and the Lieutenant knows that he means it.

Garrick leaves before you can work up the courage to tell him the other news.

-------------------------------------------------------

Dozens of riders pass by, ready to head to the flight field and assume their positions — but Dain keeps you locked in place.

“You really expect me to stand idle while you and all of our friends fight for their lives? I should be out there with them!” You huff. You’re ready to fight, fully dressed and heavily armed, and you couldn’t give a damn what he thinks.

“Absolutely not,” Dain says. “I won’t let you risk it.”

You bristle. “That isn’t your call, and you know it!”

“What are you two bickering about at this hour?” Garrick asks, one eyebrow raised.

You cross your arms over your chest, looking at your brother like a child tattling to their schoolteacher. “Please explain to the wingleader that we’re at war, and that he can’t just bench me whenever he feels like it. I’m a grown woman, and I can decide what is and isn’t safe for myself.”

“But it isn’t just you we’re talking about here,” Dain says quietly, genuine hurt in his voice.

You’re silent. Dain has a point — you don’t want to admit it, but he has a point.

Garrick doesn’t follow. “What is he going on about?”

Dain looks at you, standing his ground. “If you won’t tell him, I will.”

Your heart drops. Is he really going to force your hand here?

You have to tell Garrick eventually — you can’t keep this a secret much longer. You decide to rip the bandage off, turning to face your foster brother, though you can’t seem to raise your voice above a whisper as you speak. “Please don’t freak out, but…”

His eyes drop to the hand you have placed over your stomach, a nervous habit you’ve developed in the last week, and he puts it together before you can say the words aloud, lunging toward Dain — he’s going to kill him.

You jump between them, wrapping your arms around Garrick tightly and planting your feet to the floor, pushing him back.

He relaxes at your touch, unfolding the fist that was aimed for Dain’s jaw and resting his hand flat on your back; he could never hurt you, especially not now.

“Please don’t be mad at him,” you say into his shoulder, your eyes still squeezed shut. “This is as much my fault as it is his. We’re both adults, we knew that this could happen, but we acted anyway, and now we’re facing the consequences, together.”

Dain nods in agreement behind you. “I have every intention of marrying your sister and spending the rest of my life with her after this is over.”

You turn back to look at him, stunned.

He's never told you that before. You’d never discussed life beyond graduation — had lost too many of your friends over the years to make any promises about the future, and there was never any guarantee that you’d be stationed together after graduating, either.

“If she’ll have me, that is,” he adds, nervous.

You nod, letting go of Garrick and moving to hug Dain, hiding your face in his neck.

“Are you… crying?” Garrick asks.

“Of course I’m crying,” you sniff. “It’s the hormones.”

Dain laughs, wrapping his arms around you and pressing a kiss to your temple. “I love you, and I’m sorry for overreacting. If you want to fight with us, I won’t stop you.”

“Love you too,” you say quietly.

“Holy shit,” Bodhi breathes from across the room. “I’m gonna be an uncle?”

Oh, gods.

“Congratulations,” he grins at you before running off. “Hey guys! Guess what?”

Three seconds pass, and then there’s a loud “What the fuck?” from down the hall — that can only be Imogen.

You laugh through your tears as the ruckus continues, the rest of the marked ones reacting to the news one by one.

“At least we won’t have to tell everyone ourselves,” Dain jokes, still holding you. “Bodhi will have informed the entire army by noon.”

Garrick shakes his head, laughing too, but he sobers up quickly enough. “The circumstances may be shitty, but this kid is going to have two dozen aunts and uncles who will protect them with their life.”

“And a riot of dragons,” Cosa adds. “We will care for your young like one of ours.”

Dain is right -- you’ll figure this out together; all of you.

-------------------------------------------------------

“A perfect baby girl,” the older of the two healers tells you, smiling warmly.

You sigh in relief, resting back against the pillows and loosening your grip on Dain’s hand.

He presses a kiss to your sweaty forehead, murmuring soft praises; how strong you are, how amazing you were…

“Hi, pretty girl,” the healer coos down at her. “Let’s meet mom and dad, hm?”

It finally sets in for both of you, that you two are mom and dad now — you’re parents.

She slowly transfers the babe into your arms. You’ve never held anything this carefully in your life; afraid to move or breathe, utterly silent.

A tiny hand wiggles free from the blanket, fingers grasping at the air.

“She’s so little,” Dain whispers in awe, extending a finger. She’s quick to wrap her hand around it, latching on to him.

He looks like he’s going to cry.

“She’s not marked,” you breathe.

You’re the first of the marked ones to have a child of your own, and while you knew it was probably irrational, your biggest worry over the last six months — aside from the venin and wyvern or anything terrible happening to you or your friends — was that you would somehow pass down your relic to her, that she would live her whole life with others instantly assuming the worst of her.

“She’s free to be whatever she wants to be,” Dain says, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “She won’t be forced into conscription like we were.”

You still haven’t decided on a name -- until now.

“Saoirse Álainn,” you say softly. “It means beautiful freedom, in the old language.”

“Saoirse Álainn,” he repeats, still gazing down at her. “I like that.”

She’s beautiful indeed — the best of both of you; the gentle warmth of her father’s skin and a dusting of his dark brown hair, your eyes and nose.

“Thank you,” he says quietly, “for showing me that what I’d been taught was wrong, and giving me the greatest gift I could ever ask for.”

You can’t help but melt into him, the exhaustion finally starting to overtake you. It’s been a long night — you’d woken up around two in the morning and realized what was happening, quickly rousing Dain, who carried you down here. It’s almost noon now, soft June sun filtering through the drapes.

“I got her. You should sleep.”

He takes Saorise from you gently, careful to support her head like the healers had taught you as he cradles her in his arms.

The tiny girl makes a soft sound of complaint at the movement, but quickly relaxes, content to fall asleep against his chest.

“Get some rest, my girls,” he whispers. “I’ll be here when you wake.”

#dain aetos #dain aetos x reader #fourth wing #fourth wing x reader #mine

61 notes · View notes

histronic-gizmo · 1 year

Text

Prickcest Speculation Masterpost

I wanted to gather together all of the little screenshots, gifs and hypothesises surrounding C-137's backstory, particularly in relation to Rick Prime

Comparisons

On the left is the Season 3 Deceptive memory that our Rick used to trick the federation. On the right is the scene from the memory Morty sees when he opens Rick's downloaded brain in season 5. Both are screenshots of C-137's final line before Prime leaves. In S3, C-137 says "A different kind of Rick, I guess" and in S5, we don't know what he's saying

C-137 looks very sad in the S5 memory. Prime's face looks stunned, rather than angry. If they had a previous relationship, we can guess that maybe C-137 is cutting Prime off in this scene or 'breaking up' with him.

On the left is the S3 screenshot and the right is S5. Both show Prime holding the portal gun out to C-137

In the S3 memory, it's shown to be the apparent first time C-137 has seen inter-reality technology like this. When Prime enters at all in this memory, C-137 looks completely shocked. In S5, Rick doesn't look taken off guard or surprised at all. This implies it wasn't the first time he'd seen the technology and the conversation wasn't likely centered around the creation and usage of it. Maybe Prime was offering to take C-137 with him on his travelling of the multiverse.

Left is S3, right is S5. Both are the scene where Prime is walking away.

While not as significant as the other differences, we can see that C-137 doesn't turn to look at Prime while he's leaving in S5. He doesn't need to watch as he walks away because he's seen the portal tech before, or maybe he can't bare to watch him leave.

Lines

Rick Prime talks about not teaming up anymore when talking to hermit Jerry in S6E1. In S6E10, C-137 goes on a rant to Morty about how when you let people in they stop respecting you and "kill your family". It's implied that Prime is the one who dropped the bomb that killed C-137's family, and it's what C-137 himself assumes, so he's clearly talking about Prime. This means that he and Prime definitely knew each other before the inciting incident, otherwise what C-137 says doesn't make sense.

In S6E1, we see a hologram C-137 used to help identify Prime in his search of revenge. We see this small clip matches up with what we see in S3. We do see that Prime says "Ricks don't pass on this", however we dont hear the rest of the conversation, so we don't know if it's actually about accepting portal travel or that it was the first time these two met.

Parallels

We know that it is confirmed that C-137 was in love with Birdperson. We can see from Rick's memory of the Battle of Bloodridge, his argument with Bird Person very clearly parallels his falling out Prime, with both holding out a portal gun and then one leaving through a portal. This could imply there was a romantic or sexual connection between the two of them.

We also see a parallel between Space Beth + Domestic Beth and Rick Prime + C-137. Domestic Beth and Space Beth fall in love with each other. Domestic Beth doesn't do any grand adventures, she's a horse surgeon and has a family, like C-137 did. Space Beth had adventures and travelled the universe, like Prime did.

In Bethic Twinstinct, Space Beth says "You're the housewife, and I'm the space lady, and yet you're the one who chewed me up and spit me out?"

As I mentioned earlier, if we assume based off the body language in the season 5 memory that C-137 was most breaking things off with Prime. So Prime was also 'chewed up and spit out' despite being the epic space adventurer and not the family guy.

Beth also asks C-137 if he's "forgotten the ice cream before" (had relations with another version of himself), and he says "drill me for details when I'm drunker". Which, to me, implies he very much has.

The fact that rickcest was confirmed with this line in the same season we see C-137's "they kill your fucking family" line and Prime's "I don't team up anymore" line seems to be foreshadowing something.

Other Ideas

The "Cult" One

I first heard of this one in this video

youtube

Lonny proposes the idea that Prime was in fact going around and giving Ricks portal technology in order to recruit them into joining a group of Ricks. They points to Prime mentioning he specifically MANAGED people ("managing people is such a headache"), which implies a group of people.

They also bring up the wall of Ricks we see in the S5 flashback that C-137 uses to find more Ricks to kill. It may have been Prime's little cult following.

It doesn't explain a lot of the stuff that implies a previous relationship with C-137, so I believe that the two ideas probably go hand in hand.

It's also worth pointing out that the wall of Ricks has what appears to be a citadel symbol. The only thing is, C-137 is apparently one of the founders of the Citadel, but we see him kill a large gathering of Ricks, and we see this citadel symbol pre-citadel.

I am literally only realizing this as I'm writing this post, so I don't have a put together idea of what it may mean. I think it's possible that maybe Evil Morty was involved in that original Rick Cult, because I don't think that symbol became the Citadel's until after he was elected. That's off the top of my head, though.

The "Time Travel" One

This one isn't one with much backing, however I think it's neat. Credit for this one goes to this Tumblr post.

This person suggested that maybe the reason C-137 hates time travel so much is because Prime might've lied and said he was C-137 from the future. He hates it because it was used to manipulate him

Misc.

In S6E10, we briefly see a hologram of Prime that doesn't match with any footage we've seen of him before.

I don't have any clever comments about how this could fit into prickcest as I'm writing, but I would like to include it in case someone else has something to say about it.

My Personal Ideas

My take away from all the evidence I've presented has lead to my current idea of events:

Prime and C-137 had a healthy, romantic relationship. However, with C-137's wife and daughter, guilt started to eat away. He tried to talk to Prime about it and Prime's response was "run away with me and travel the multiverse" and C-137 just couldn't bare the thought of abandoning his family, so he broke things off with Prime. Prime was upset, "Rick's dont pass on" the opportunity to travel the infinite cosmos. "Rick's don't pass on" the opportunity to be with someone they love.

I hope you found this post to be comprehensive, and please PLEASE add on stuff in the notes!! We need to gather evidence! /lh

#Youtube #gizmo text #rick and morty #rick and morty spoilers #prickcest #prickcest speculation #rick prime #prime rick #weird rick #c-137 #rick sanchez #rickcest #rick and morty fandom #rick and morty theory

571 notes · View notes

owlwithanapple · 9 days

Text

Bird & Fox

Chapter 3

Jason POV

After Dickhead's nagging and the charm of Alfred's loving breakfast, my choice is return to the manor that I didn't want to go back, to meet those people I once hated.

Although it was in the past, I had a rough time. I wanted to go home, the home that belonged to Bruce and me, but I saw Tim standing next to Bruce in Robin costume.

Maybe a replacement, or coincidence. I don't know, and don't care. I used to want Bruce to look at me, but now I don't care. I just want to do what I want, no longer be bound by Bruce, and enjoy it freely.

In name, I am his son, Jason Todd Wayne, but he is gone. Now I am Jason Todd, living in the name of Red Hood, no longer living as Robin.

I don't know what Bruce thinks, I know we have the same goals and responsibilities, although we pursue different directions, we have common interests, that's all.

In the past, I couldn't face Wayne family, but now I can. Maybe I've let it go or I don't care anymore, and I don't deny that I hated them.

Arriving at the manor, I haven't gotten off the motorcycle yet, I just prepared myself mentally in the parking space. I can't avoid Bruce here. This time I came purely for breakfast and business, I don't want to think about it anymore.

Suddenly there was a noise, the idiot Dickhead who came to greet me. Although I was impatient, but didn't hate him, unless he was an idiot. After all, he was the eldest brother, and I was taken care of by him a lot.

"Hey Babybird! You're so slow!" Dick leaned in front of me and spoke loudly. I was disturbed by his shrill voice. I pushed his face away from me with my hand to reduce his shrill voice.

"Don't get close to me, you're so noisy, Dickhead..." I walked past him and entered the manor. Dickhead followed me closely. I heard him talking to me non-stop. What a good brother, so annoying.

When I walked to the hall, I saw Tim inputting data on the computer. Damian playing with his dog Titus, and the most heartwarming thing was Alfred greeting me with a smile. Bruce, the rich father, who was reading the newspaper seriously.

Damn, the atmosphere is so awkward. I really don't want to come...

Bruce handed the newspaper to Alfred and stood up walked to me. He stretched out his hand tried to touch me. I stepped back but was greeted by a surprise hug from Bruce, "Welcome back, Jason."

For a moment I froze, at a loss, not knowing how to react. It had been a long time since I was hugged by Bruce like this. Was it a long-lost reunion between father and son or was he up to something bad?

I saw Damian standing behind Bruce with a look of disgust on his face. Bruce was indeed the kind of person who didn't show his emotions in his expression. It was rare to see him take the initiative to care for me and cherish me. It was indeed very rare.

My hands trembled slightly, cold sweat broke out on my palms and head, a nervous emotion surged in my heart. I didn't know how to react.

I looked at Dickhead who was standing aside.He gestured to pat Bruce's back to comfort him. I was not good at this behavior, but I still did as he instructed. Bruce felt my hand patting his back "Hey Bruce, you hug too tight..."

After realizing it, he gently let me go. I scratched my head awkwardly, not knowing whether to be happy or sad. This was the thing I couldn't understand the most. He was my father and Batman, but I had no idea what he was thinking.

He had a faint smile on his face. He held my shoulder and said, "Let's have breakfast together." With just one simple sentence, I felt a warm and cold feeling in my heart.

"Well..." I walked around him and went to the dining table, leaving the others in the hall.

"Dick... do you think I'm doing the right thing?" Bruce asked.

Dick patted his back, "You have to try."

Tim walked up to Bruce, "You did a good job. Take it step by step."

Damian added, "disgusting father-son relationship."

Seeing the family gathered together after a long absence, Alfred couldn't help laughing, at the same time he felt relieved because I didn't refuse Bruce's hug or his request to eat together.

"I'm hungry!" I shouted.

Everyone heard my shout hurried to the dining table. I put my feet on the chair, and Alfred scolded me. Table etiquette must be followed and feet must be on the floor. After Alfred finished scolding, he went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

Bruce and others sat down one after another, but the only one who was unhappy was the brat next to me, Damian. It just happened that this unpleasant kid sat next to me, he looked exactly like Bruce, and he was so arrogant.

"Demon brat." I mocked him.

"Childish." Damian retorted.

"Believe it or not, I will beat you until there are no teeth left." I clenched my fists under the table.

"Come and try if you have the guts." Damian was happy to accompany me.

"Violence is prohibited at the table." Bruce added.

Hearing Bruce's words, my fists loosened. It wasn't I afraid losing to Damian in fight, I just didn't want to dirty the table that Alfred took the most care of.

"Jason, you seem to be in a good mood today." Tim suddenly said.

I was surprised. Tim's observation ability really can't be underestimated. "Not bad."

Dickhead heard the voice and rushed over. "Share it!"

"The annoying guy is in a good mood." Damian added.

I glared at Demon brat. "It's better than you, who are full of gloom all day long."

Everyone was talking nonsense. We were often interviewed outside. Bruce and us were the most popular. We were asked so many nonsense questions even when we were in school.

"Everyone, breakfast is here." As soon as Alfred said that, everyone was looking forward to the loving breakfast. He served the breakfast little by little and placed it in front of everyone.

I took the tableware and started eating immediately. Bruce saw me wolfing down the food and enjoyed the breakfast with a look of satisfaction.

"It's better to have a lively home, right? Master Bruce." Alfred whispered.

Bruce agreed with Alfred's point of view, "Indeed, it's been a long time."

Y/N POV

In the afternoon, you decide go to the supermarket before going home to buy things to fill the empty kitchen. All the ingredients you see are neatly arranged on the shelves. You carefully select them one by one and put them in the shopping cart.

Milk, eggs, rice, butter and other daily ingredients. Candy, potato chips, soda and other snacks are one of your must-have choices for watching TV series. Of course, nutritious vegetables, fruits and fish are also indispensable.

In SHINOBI, all ingredients are carefully selected and cooked. In order to maintain a good figure, some nutritious meals and physical exercises are prepared to improve the strength and nutrition of the body.

Occasionally, you sneaked to buy a bottle of Coke and a bag of potato chips during the mission. Unfortunately still couldn't escape their eyes. The snacks were confiscated, but you learned to be smart. You ate them quickly and didn't take them back so wouldn't be caught.

Still can't take it lightly yet. The crime rate in this city is extremely high. If you relax, accidents that happen at any time can become a crisis, so still have to pay attention to exercise and take more nutrition.

You took your favorite dark chocolate. Sometimes when you are stressed or worried, you always want to eat chocolate. Don’t know if it’s a psychological effect, but you feel your mind is clearer after eating sweets.

Nowadays, supermarkets are really convenient. There is even a special area for animal food. You chose some dog food for Kirin to enjoy. After all, he has been with you for so long. If you don’t love him well, you are not a competent and good owner.

Shopping is really sinful. You spend the money recklessly. Unknowingly, the whole shopping cart is full of goods. You are careless and buy too much. A bunch of daily necessities and food.

After checking out, you look at the full shopping cart wonder what to do. It’s impossible to push the shopping cart home. There are no taxis nearby. The first time you shop in Gotham City, you face the problem of not being able to go home.

In an unfamiliar area, there is no choice to ask for help. You took out your phone try to find Jason’s contact but you left your phone number to Jason and didn’t get his number. Now you are really finished.

Jason POV

After breakfast, I went to the Batcave with others for meeting. The monitor was showing a video of a weirdo wearing strange equipment and a fox mask talking to Batman and Robin.

Tim showed everyone the most popular parkour video on social media. The weirdo was called "Gotham runner", a lame name, so embarrassing.

She was agile and humorous, a chatterbox, and her accent was not like that of the locals. Her behavior was very strange. It was completely unclear what her purpose was, and she did not want to kill Bruce and Damian.

Bruce sat in a chair "She called herself Kitsune or Fox, and just said a few words to us then disappeared."

Tim pointed at the screen "She is Cyber Ninja, an organization created by Japan. As for why she came to Gotham City, it is still unclear."

I put my hands in my pockets "This weirdo is just looking for trouble."

"Can't figure out her purpose for the time being." Dickhead raised his hand.

"T.T, next time I see her, I will definitely teach her a lesson, a fox looks down on people." Damian clenched his fists.

Bruce stood up and walked closer to the computer screen. "Pay more attention when patrolling at night. Talk to her before she does anything ruthless."

Damian and I were dumbfounded. Bruce actually gave such an explanation. I really don't understand why he showed mercy. As long as the enemy is abnormal and hostile, he should be taken down without mercy.

Bruce saw through my thoughts and said, "Jason, I am not showing mercy. I want to see the ability of Cyber Ninja, especially Kitsune."

I shook my shoulders and said, "Whatever you want."

Dickhead inserted himself between Bruce and me, holding Bruce's shoulder with his left hand and my shoulder with his right hand and said, "Find out about her first, then draw conclusions, right?"

"Cyber Ninja works for Japan, but this is the first time I have seen her in Gotham City. Is it possible that she is a copycat?" Tim mentioned while reasoning.

Damian stood up and said, "She is very strong. I feel uncomfortable because I can't feel any hostility from her."

I looked at Demon brat, "Huh? You are just a dead kid. That fox face is taller than you, of course is stronger than you. Are you talking nonsense?"

"You bastard, I must beat you up today." Damian was about to rush towards me.

When I was about to beat him up, Dickhead interrupted us and said, "Now is not the time to start an internal conflict. Stop it."

Bruce breathed a sigh of relief, "Currently, only Damian has contact with her, and the video captured her parkour and jumping postures on the roof. She does not look like an imitator. Maybe she is the Cyber Ninja herself.”

"After all, her movements very skilled. If want to imitate her, it will take a long time to be proficient. But..." Tim added.

I looked at Tim who was slow to speak, "What's wrong?"

Tim zoomed in the video mark the equipment on the weirdo, then checked the news about Cyber Ninja in Japan, and then zoomed in the equipment of one of the Cyber Ninja members who was photographed for comparison.

"From the equipment point of view, it is indeed similar. But this technology is only owned by Cyber Ninja, it is not easily available to the outside world." Tim gave an explanation.

Damian said, "Father, if there is hostility and the negotiation fails, I will never show mercy."

Bruce understood what Damian meant, he nodded, "The time and place of her appearance not been clearly determined, and it is necessary to pay more attention to the night patrol."

Although I was very reluctant and did not accept Bruce's statement, after all, this weirdo was difficult to catch. Even if was not hostile, as long she was a little threatening, she should be taken down instead of negotiating.

However, negotiation and inquiries are indeed helpful. I don't feel threatened by the weirdo. She is just a chatterbox who is talking nonsense. She is not afraid of Batman even Robin. Should I say it's interesting or fearless.

Tim sat in front of the computer and continued to investigate other useful information. Dickhead and Damian seemed to be discussing the next training plan. Bruce just stood beside me in silence.

I took out my phone to check the time. It was already afternoon. I clicked into Y/N's chat room and sent a message to say hello. I wonder where she is now, maybe she is wandering around somewhere in Gotham City.

Y/N POV

When you are in trouble, you are surprised to receive a text message from an unknown number. You click into the chat room to find out what is going on. A familiar motorcycle photo is placed on the profile picture.

🏍️: Hi, Y/N. It's me, Jason.

🐶: Hi!

Save the number now!

🏍️: What are you doing?

🐶: ...

🏍️: What's the matter?

🐶: I'm an idiot...

🏍️: Huh?

🐶: I can't go home...

🏍️: Huh? ! Where are you? !

🐶: *Send current location*

🏍️: Supermarket?

🐶: Help🆘....

🏍️: I'm here to pick you up now! Wait for me!

🐶: Remember to drive a car.

🏍️: Why?

🐶: You must drive a car.

🏍️: …ok

Jason POV

What happened? Did she get into trouble? She's asking me for help? She even sent an SOS notification? Did something happen to the supermarket? But the police didn't receive any notification, and asked me to drive a car there.

"Hey, Timbers. Help me check something happened to this supermarket?" It would be the wisest choice to ask Tim for help at this time. Now his mind is busy with work and he can't leave the computer.

Tim understood and immediately started to investigate my request. Bruce walked over and put his hand on my shoulder. Dickhead and Demon brat followed curiously to see what was going on.

It's damn crowded now. I asked Tim for help. Why did these idiots come to disturb? Bruce on the left and Dickhead on the right. Fortunately, Demon brat was next to Tim.

"Jason, the supermarket you mentioned has not received any alarm and is currently open for business." Tim turned his head and looked at me.

I breathed a sigh of relief. It was a good thing that nothing happened. Maybe Y/N was a road idiot couldn't get home. I couldn't help imagine she was alone in front of the supermarket. I couldn't bear to see it.

"Hey! Bruce!" I looked at Bruce.

Bruce was suddenly startled by my shout, "What's wrong?"

I reached out, "Give me the car keys."

Dickhead lay on my back asked curiously, "Why do you want the car keys? Are you racing?"

"Get off me, I'm going to pick up my..." I suddenly stopped what I was about to say.

"Your what?" Demon brat also joined in the fun.

"Shut up!" I scolded them.

"Is it a friend? Boyfriend? Girlfriend?" Tim suddenly came to interfere.

I glared at them yelled at them, "It's definitely not what you think! Just friends! That's all!"

Dickhead, the idiot, smiled and approached me and said, "You haven't entered that relationship yet, right?"

I pushed him away helplessly, "It's a pity, our relationship is very simple."

"You are nervous when you asked me to check the safety of the place. You are interested in her." Tim smiled faintly.

"I'm not nervous, you idiots!" I was too lazy to pay attention to them and was about to leave.

Damian interrupted, "A caring man, Jason Todd."

"Even you are talking nonsense." I crossed my arms and glared at him.

These guys don't think there's much trouble, they love to gossip about me. I was watching a movie with a girl before, and they happened to find me. They asked me to invite her to the manor for dinner, unfortunately she was just looking for a sex partner, and I just needed to vent.

But this time I really care about Y/N, I don't deny it. I don't know why she just attracted me little by little. I haven't known her for more than 24 hours, and a life-saving message made me restless.

Bruce took out the car keys from his pocket and handed to me, "Here, drive carefully."

Bruce actually took out the car keys and gave them to me without asking me why. I took the car keys from Bruce's hand, took the coat beside and put it on, I turned to look at Bruce, "Thank you." After saying that, I was ready to leave Batcave.

"She is always welcome to our house. If your friend is willing, we can have dinner together." Bruce said this, which surprised me.

"Yes~ Bring it back and have a look~" Dickhead smiled idiotically.

I raised my middle finger "Get lost, idiot," and left the Batcave.

"So arrogant." Damian pouted.

"Compared to you." Tim laughed.

Y/N POV

You didn't expect the first message sent to Jason was a request for help. You thought about it again and again found it very ridiculous. There was really no other way. You didn't have your own car and there were no taxis nearby. You could only ask Jason for help.

You couldn't use your skills to make it easier for yourself in crowded places on the street. If suddenly flew over the eaves or jumped to the opposite building, passers-by would call the police immediately and think you were a terrorist, causing the city to fall into panic.

Night is really a good time to act. There are not many people on the road, only criminals and Batman. Even if they do strange things, they are used to it, just like the first time they met me, sitting on a high place and enjoying it.

Before waiting for Jason come, you looked at the bags of things on the ground. Shopping really makes people happy, you can spend money endlessly even though these daily necessities are only a few dollars.

If Jason saw it, you would probably be scolded by him.... You suddenly sent a message for help, but when he arrived, saw that it was just these things. Maybe he would scold you directly.

While you wait patiently, a dark black luxury car stops in front of you. Its cool exterior design attracts the attention of passersby. If remember correctly, the model of this car is BMW M3. Which rich person drives a luxury car in such a civilian area?

The person who got out of the car as soon as the door opened was your friend Jason Todd. He was driving a motorcycle in the morning, but how come he drove a car in the afternoon? Is he a low-key invisible rich man?

He closed the door, fixed his hair, and walked in front of you. He looked nervous. You were stunned. Who is he? His temperament is different between the morning and the afternoon.

"Sorry for the wait." He said.

You glanced at his handsome face then at the car and blurted out "Where did you steal it?"

He turned his head look at the car then at you and chuckled "Are you serious? Have you ever seen such a handsome car thief?"

"That's not the case. I only saw a narcissistic handsome guy and a car." You told him with a smile.

"That's right, I'm not a car thief. This is just one of the cars."

Hearing "one of the cars", your ears perked up "Huh?!"

He raised his thumb and pointed back at the car "This is my dad's car."

You stared at him with wide eyes "Introduce your dad to me."

"You'd better not have any ideas about my dad." He pressed my head.

"Stingy." You crossed your hands in front of your chest.

After joking, he asked "So your SOS is?"

You pointed to the bag full of daily necessities on the ground "I bought too much. There is no taxi nearby. I can't go home." You turned your head to the side, thinking that he would definitely scold you if he knew the reason for calling him here was this.

He whistled, "Wow, you are really good at shopping." He opened the trunk of the car, walked in front of you and said with a smile, "Thank goodness I'm here, put the things in the trunk first."

You were confused that he didn't scold you, but also helped you put the things in the car considerately. You didn't idle around hurried to help. You handed it to him and he arranged them neatly one by one.

After putting all the things in the car, he closed the trunk, then walked to the passenger seat to open the door for you, with his hand bent in front of his abdomen, like a butler, "Please come in."

His behavior shocked you and also very funny until you two laughed out loud, because it really didn't fit his image at all, and you couldn't imagine such a gentleman Jason.

"Hey, stop laughing, or I'll leave you behind." He said with a smile standing by the car door.

You quickly ran over sat in the passenger seat, fastened your seat belt, "I'm ready."

He put his hand on the car, "Good girl." He closed the car door after saying that.

The interior facilities of the car are very user-friendly, comfortable and spacious, showing a very elegant and noble temperament. The air in the car has a faint minty fragrance, and there is no dust.

Who is Jason's father, what is his identity, there is not only a car in the family, the car also looks clean neat, and there is no mess in the car, which shows that Jason's father is very particular about hygiene.

He got in the car and started the engine, adjusted the temperature of the air conditioner, and the display screen in the car lit up. He selected a lyrical song and pressed the play button, holding the steering wheel with one hand "So where are we going now?"

"I miss Kirin." You said with a smile.

He laughed out loud "Yes, your pet is waiting for you."

Hearing the words "pet is waiting for you", you pouted and said "Heh! That guy wants to roll on my bed all day long."

He laughed out loud when he heard it. "Hahaha, your bed is comfortable." He opened the display screen again and select the location. "Enter your home address and press the OK button."

You do as he said and pressed the OK button. The distance and time were displayed on the screen. He took a look understood and started to turn the steering wheel to back up the car and turned a corner to drive on the road.

"Thanks, you helped me a lot." You said softly.

"You're welcome, it's just a small matter, just think me as your driver." He smiled.

"You can be my driver, but drive your father's car?"

"My own car at home."

"You don't live with your father?"

He shook his head and felt depressed. "Occasionally I go back to have meal and chat, and I'm working the rest of the time."

"So you're going back to your father's house today?"

He nodded. "Yes, that's why I drove my father's car to pick you up."

You tilted your head. "How many cars do you have?"

"Do you want to include the motorcycle?"

"Give me the total."

He calmed down, flicking the steering wheel with his fingers, muttering something in his mouth, "About 8, 5 motorcycles, 3 cars."

You dropped your jaw in shock, "You are a rich man? Why do you have so many cars?"

"I earned it from work, I didn't steal or rob it." He chuckled.

You stared at him "Hmmm, so suspicious."

"What about you? Unemployed?" He asked.

"Yes."

Just when the traffic light turned red, he stopped the car, "You are also suspicious, unemployed and buying so many things."

His words instantly woke you up, it is indeed suspicious, unemployed but has the spending power, you laughed it off, "The money saved from my previous job."

He turned to you, staring at your face, then focusing his eyes on the scar on your arm, "What's wrong with your arm?"

You covered your arm, which was injured during training, but you couldn't say it out loud, and you felt a little choked up. "Something happened." After saying that, just listened to the song playing in the car silently.

"Sorry, I made you recall it." He apologized, and the traffic light turned green. He stepped on the accelerator and turned the steering wheel to continue driving.

Realizing that the atmosphere had become awkward, Jason's expression looked self-blaming and embarrassed. You didn't want to have a bad relationship with him. After all, he was your first friend in this city.

Jason POV

It's over, the topic has become stagnant. Scars are indeed bad memories, especially for people who care about appearance. No matter how optimistic she is, she should find it difficult to forget the pain she endured.

I also have scars in my heart. I can remember every memory vividly, and sometimes I can even feel the pain. When I wanted to apologize to her again, her next sentence touched me.

She blurted out, "Jason, scars will not make me feel inferior. They are marks that I am proud of." She showed a very optimistic and natural smile, not false or showing off.

My heart suddenly beat, suddenly an inexplicable feeling came over me. Because of my identity, I tried to close myself not show too many emotional fluctuations, but I couldn't do it when facing her.

Even when demon brat asked me what she was to me, I hesitated. In fact, I didn't want to deny Timbers's question of friends or girlfriends. To be precise, I think she and I are friends.

I drove attentively facing forward, when I saw the distance showed that we were about to reach her apartment. I really wanted to tell her before she got off the car that I also had scars on my heart that ached every day, but with her words, I no longer felt the pain.

Y/N POV

From the topic of scars to now, Jason fell into silence, saying nothing and driving with a blank expression. Could it be that Jason also has a sad past that is branded with scars?

Until you arrived at the downstairs of the apartment building, you handed him the access card. After scanning, Jason parked the car in the underground garage. You took off your seat belt saw Jason had not taken off his seat belt yet, holding the steering wheel with both hands as if he had something to say.

"Jason..." You whispered, with your hands on his shoulders.

He loosened his hands and leaned back on the seat. After covering his eyes with his hands and sighing, he put his hands down and looked at you directly. "I also have scars engraved in my heart. They are my lifelong nightmares, but without them, I would not be who I am now. Thank you, Y/N."

You pointed at yourself. "Why me?"

He closed his eyes and chuckled before looking at you. "Your words encouraged me."

"You were silent and I thought you were going to kick me out of the car." You punched his arm.

"Ouch~ It hurts." He joked.

You both get out of the car, he opens the trunk, you take out all your stuff, and arrange them neatly on the ground first, he closes the trunk and locks the car, holding a few bags in his hands.

You are confused "Aren't you going back?"

He carried your things. "If I go back, when will you take these bags?"

"You help me take them up?"

"Of course, I'm your driver, and it's my priority to get you home safely." He looked at the elevator.

It seems that you can't get rid of him, you nodded, carrying the remaining bags, "Follow me."

The two of you stepped into the elevator together, you pressed the button for the 12th floor, and the elevator slowly rose to the floor. After arriving, the elevator door opened, and Jason left first the elevator and stood outside.

"Welcome to the 12th floor." He played the role of a butler.

You stretched out your foot kicked him. "Just now you were a driver, now you are a butler?"

"Haha, I can also be a bodyguard."

This guy is really confident. "It's a pity, I can protect myself, so I don't need a bodyguard~"

"Try not to go out at night." Jason suddenly said seriously.

"Eh?"

He sighed, "Gotham City is not safe."

You understood what he meant and nodded, "I understand."

"If there is any danger, you must tell me the first time."

You tilted your head, "Why? You want to be my bodyguard?"

He chuckled, "I am confident in my skills, at least I can help."

His tone was heavy but he was telling the truth. You nodded and smiled, "I'll have to trouble you to be my bodyguard part-time~"

After you finished talking, you stepped out of the elevator, walked in front of him, led him to your door. The door number was 9. You put the things in your left hand on the ground, took out the house key from your pocket, inserted the key into the keyhole and turned it to unlock it.

Jason opened the door for you, "Welcome home, Miss Y/N."

You were happy to be coaxed by him, "What a gentleman, thank you."

You stepped into the house, stood at the entrance looked at the quiet corridor. You shouted into the house, "Kirin yo Kirin~"

"Woof woof!" Your corgi rushed over and circled around your legs.

"Jason, let me introduce you. He is the corgi dog Kirin. Kirin, this is your new friend Jason." You put everything on the dining table.

Jason came and put the things down, then squatted on the ground stretched out his hand to Kirin, "Hey, Kirin."

Kirin was smelling Jason's scent, just like he did the same to you when you first adopted him. After getting familiar with Jason's scent, he circled around Jason.

"Jason, go sit in the living room first, I'll sort these things out."

Kirin ran to your side and circled around you, barking non-stop to attract your attention. But you were busy sorting things out didn't pay much attention to him. You took all the kitchen utensils and ingredients from the dining table into the kitchen and put them away neatly.

"Do you want my help?" He approached the dining table and put his hands on the table.

You leaned against the kitchen door "You're off work today."

"Woof!"

"Kirin, I'll accompany you after I'm done, okay~"

Jason nodded slightly "Okay, in that case. Kirin, since mommy busy, we play together, okay?" He picked Kirin up.

Kirin licked Jason's face with his tongue to show his friendliness.

You laughed out loud "Mommy? Did I hear you right?"

He shook his shoulders "You raise it, you are the mother, am I wrong?"

Kirin barked.

"Kirin agrees with me." Jason looked at Kirin and smiled.

You smiled and nodded "Okay. Have fun. Don't let Kirin bite the table, you can use the TV." Then you walked into the kitchen.

Jason POV

I carried Kirin to the living room and took a look at what the home of a girl living alone looks like. It was a three-bedroom, one-living-room house. The walls and floors were all dominated by wood color.

The simple and stylish white sofa, the dark black coffee table, and the monotonous brown carpet, all the furniture were matched with fresh and elegant wood color, which was in line with her aesthetic orientation.

I put Kirin on the sofa and sat next to him and stroked his furry hair. I took out my phone and saw a bunch of messages from Dickhead. I really didn't want to pay attention to his messages, but I still clicked in to read them.

Dickhead: Did you have fun with your friends?

Jason: Fuck you.

Dickhead: Male? Female?

Jason: None of your business.

Dickhead: What are you doing in the apartment?

Jason: The fuck?

Dickhead: Bruce's car has a tracking system.

Jason: Damn...

Dickhead: What are you doing?

Jason: Nothing.

Dickhead: Are you two done? !

Jason: We didn't do anything!

I put my phone away and continued to have fun with Kirin.

Y/N POV

After everything was put away, you took out the blueberries and grapes from the refrigerator, washed and placed them on a plate, then put the tea bag in the teapot and brewed the tea. You took the plate of fruit, the brewed tea and the teacup to the living room.

You placed them on the coffee table, and you pressed the lid of the teapot to pour the tea into the cup, carefully handing the poured tea to Jason to avoid pouring or spilling it.

He took the teacup with one hand, put it in his mouth to drink a sip of the warm tea, and then took a few blueberries put them in his mouth to chew. You went back to the kitchen to get a bag of dog biscuits and poured them into the dog bowl, "Kirin~ It's time to eat."

Kirin jumped off the sofa and rushed to the bowl eat crazily after hearing this. Jason was surprised to see Kirin's big appetite. This is Kirin's daily life.

You sat next to Jason and took the fruit plate in your hand, put the grapes into your mouth one by one and chewed slowly, "Finally done."

"Well done." He took a grape and put it in his mouth to chew.

"No work today?"

"The driver and butler's work has been completed, the only work left is the night work."

"Night work?" You are curious.

He smiled and said, "I work the night shift,mostly."

"Haha, so you can work part-time as my driver and butler." You chewed a blueberry and handed the fruit plate to Jason.

He took the fruit plate and said, "I'm curious why you immigrated to Gotham City? Isn't there a better choice?"

You leaned on the sofa and thought about it, not knowing how to answer. You were expelled from the organization and exiled to Gotham City, but this is not what you should say. If you say it, Jason doesn't know how he will react. He might think you are crazy.

"I want to live the life I want to live in a place where no one knows me." You look at Jason.

You two looked at each other and Jason's eyes returned to the fruit plate. "I understand. We all have bad experiences."

You wonder if SHINOBI companions still remember you. Since you moved here, you have been missing the past every moment. Even if ninjas are solitary warriors, they still care about each other. "Jason, if I suddenly leave one day, will you miss me?"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Literally..." You lifted your legs and hugged them, resting your head on your knees.

Jason's expression was obviously confused by your topic. Such a heavy topic suddenly became difficult for anyone to digest. It was also a kind of pressure to push your heavy burden on others.

You turned your head look at Jason and noticed his expression very serious. You realized you said the wrong thing. You was thinking about how to change the topic, but Jason interrupted your thinking.

"If you leave, I will find you." He said this in a gentle voice.

"I was just joking."

"Whether it's a joke or serious, since you asked, I will give you an answer. I will find you. This is what I can do and my answer."

Your heart was moved by Jason's gentleness. You looked out the window awkwardly and at a loss. You scratched your head and didn't know how to respond. You had never experienced such a sudden change.

"Umm, Y/N..."

"What's the matter?" You turned to him.

He told you with a serious look, "I'm serious."

For some reason, you felt a warm sensation on your cheeks. When you looked at Jason again, his serious expression had turned into a gentle smile. Compared to before and now, this is the first time you have so many complicated emotions.

"Thank you, Jason."

"Woof!" Kirin ran to the sofa and barked after finishing his meal.

"Hey, Kirin. Are you full? Are the dog biscuits prepared by mommy delicious?" Jason left the sofa squatted in front of Kirin, picked him up and coaxed him.

"Woof!" Kirin licked Jason's face as if he was acting cute to him.

"Very good, very good, you are the best." Jason coaxed Kirin like a father.

When you moved in alone, there was no other sound except Kirin's barking and sound of the TV. Jason's arrival turned this home into a warm and happy space.

You left the sofa and squatted next to Jason. "Kirin likes you very much."

"Hahaha, I think so too."

"Okay, Kirin, hold mommy." You clapped your hands and called Kirin.

Kirin looked at you and fell into Jason's arms.

You clenched your fists "This dog traitor! He actually ignored me! I'm your mommy!

Jason realized and immediately protected Kirin. "Mommy, calm down."

"How can I calm down! I am the one who feeds it every day!"

Kirin jumped out of Jason's arms and ran away, leaving you two laughing in the living room. The scene of Kirin running away in fear was so funny that you two laughed so hard.

"Stinky traitor, roast him next time." You said with a smile.

"Go easy on him, mommy." Jason stood up.

You sat on the floor "I know, you spoil him too much."

"Who told him to be around me."

Jason's phone rang. You couldn't see whose name it was, but Jason's expression became serious. He avoided you went to the kitchen answer the call. You sat on the floor in the living room continued to drink tea.

After a while, Jason came out of the kitchen, sighed, there was only a faint smile on his face. You realized that he was troubled, but he didn't say anything, just leaned against the kitchen door look at his phone.

You stood up walked to his side. He noticed that you were approaching immediately put the phone back in his pocket. You noticed that he rarely used his phone in front of you and tried to turn off the silent mode, especially when you two were alone.

"Work?"

He nodded "Yeah."

You poked him with your arm "Keep it up."

"I will. Bye."

He sat in the hallway put on his boots. He turned the doorknob to open it. He didn't leave directly, but just stood quietly outside the door.

He looked reluctant and said "I'm leaving first."

"Yeah." You nodded.

"Remember, call me first if anything."

"I know, I've remembered it."

"Good girl."

After saying that, he took the first step to leave. You reached out and took his arm. You didn't know why your body suddenly lost control. What should you do at this time?

"Y/N? What's wrong?"

"Jason..."

"I'm here."

"Call me again." You smiled at him.

He chuckled "Sure, I promise."

"Bye." You both said goodbye at the same time. He left your house. You closed and locked the door. When you returned to the living room, you turned on the TV sat on the sofa.

"So quiet..." You look at the two teacups on the coffee table.

Jason POV

I left the elevator and went back to the car, leaning back on the seat, closing my eyes and thinking about the happiness I had just experienced. I felt this moment was really short, I wanted to stay there. I felt the place where she was, was my safe haven.

I felt I was selfish. I had things I should do, so did she. Every day I faced various dangerous situations. If I stayed with her long time, I might not be able to predict her safety.

Now a Cyber Ninja has come to this city, it is still unknown whether it will pose any threat. I know nothing about that weirdo, and I should not understand.

But the feeling of uneasiness always surged in my heart. What should I do if Joker chooses her? I clenched the steering wheel with both hands. When I thought of that psychopath Joker, I broke out in cold sweat.

"No!" I shouted, because I knew very well the psychopath's target was me. He wanted use me to cause conflict between me and Batman, he wanted to use my hand to overthrow Batman.

I will never let this happen, I will never let anyone hurt her. Only she is different. She dares to show her scars even though she has them on her body. Her smile and voice are my salvation.

Only she...

"Ding!" A message alert sound brought me back to a calm state. I took out my phone saw it was a message from her. I clicked on it saw she sent a photo of Kirin sleeping. I saved the photo.

I laughed out loud, "Hahaha, so funny."

After calming down, I drove out of the apartment and returned to the manor. I told myself as long as I was still maintaining the peace of the city, I could go to see her with peace of mind, and she could live in peace.

Chapter 3 End.

Do you think it's time for Red Hood meet Kitsune?

37 notes · View notes

thedeerman · 1 month

Text

RadioApple Fic:

Do You Want To Know?

Hey all, this is the first chapter of my little slow burn radioapple fic. Please let me know what you think, I don’t write much!!

Ch1: A New Idea

It’s been three weeks since the attempted extermination. Three weeks since Lucifer just barely saved the life of his daughter in a fight that nearly killed everyone she cared about. Three weeks since he helped to build the new hotel and moved into his very own suite. It’s been both terrible and beautiful for Lucifer. He had hardly spoken to another soul for years and now was thrown into daily gatherings with sinners he didn’t know. Some of which he certainly didn’t care to know. But those gatherings also included his daughter. His wonderful, smart, passionate, forgiving daughter. I don’t deserve her, Lucifer thinks constantly. He spent years neglecting their relationship, burying himself in his own sorrow, and yet Charlie welcomed him in without a second thought. Without even asking for an explanation or apology for his years of absence. He’s not sure where she got such a big heart, but he’s beyond grateful that she has it. And as an attempt to show her just how dedicated he is to helping her see out her dream, he’s been showing up for every morning meeting. Every ‘family’ dinner. Every chore list, cooking schedule, errands run, nearly anything that could be signed up for, he does. Lucifer didn’t mind chores much. Cooking was fun and he could be experimental (in a way that didn’t include human remains, much to the other residents’ delight). Doing dishes or laundry was something as monotonous and calming as making ducks and other little trinkets. And on the days when he really just wasn’t in the mood to deal with it, he simply used his magic to help him get it done quickly. No matter how emotionally taxing, how time consuming, or how frustrating the task was, Lucifer was ready and willing to do anything he could to help his daughter succeed.

It’s because of this that Lucifer ends up on the attendance list for all of Charlie’s ’family’ activities for the hotel. It doesn’t seem too bad at first, but as the activities get to be a little more personal, Lucifer ends up regretting how agreeable he was to his daughter’s every request. A bit too late to be kicking myself for that now... Lucifer thinks as he sits in yet another hotel ‘family’ meeting. The ‘family’ being Charlie of course, her girlfriend Vaggie, the spider demon/porn star Angel, the grumpy bartender Husk, the scary little maid (the one that killed Adam, no less) Niffty, Angel’s one eyed bomb loving friend Cherri, now Lucifer, and... Ugh. This guy, the fallen angel thinks, as the final ‘family’ member graces them with his presence by appearing from the shadows. Alastor... What a pain in the ass. Lucifer doesn't actually have much reason to hate the demon aside from his frustrating theatrics and his need to always be the one Charlie pays the most attention to. Whatever game you’re playing, I’ve got my eye on you, he’s always thinking.

“Alrighty everyone!” His daughter’s voice catches Lucifer’s attention. “Now that we’re all here, I’d like to announce that we will be trying a new activity!” There are a series of groans from the group. None from Alastor, of course. But his creepy, always there smile seems strained, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly as Charlie continued. “So! You all know how we’ve been trying out some new ideas as test runs for new residents,” she starts. Yes, and it’s been excruciating. No one involved has been enjoying being guinea pigs for Charlie’s therapy experiments. The only silver lining being that the new residents wouldn’t have to suffer the same fates, as each and every “new activity” so far has been tossed out after a resounding failure of some kind or another. Fights, tears, broken furniture, and excessive day drinking have occurred both during and after a few of these sessions. Her ideas weren’t terrible in concept, but in practice, with demons and fallen angels and souls under contract, they just weren’t working. Lucifer’s attention is once again brought to the front of the room as Charlie continues.

“And yes, I understand that the past few exercises we’ve tried... haven’t exactly ended well.” Lucifer hates the sad look in her eyes as she considers her failures, but it’s gone as quickly as it arrived. “But after a lot of discussion and thinking about how and why our previous activities went so....” She pauses, looking for the right word. “Awful? Terrible? Destructive? Shitty? Depressing?” Angel adds. Vaggie glared his way but the demon wasn’t paying any attention. “Yes, thank you Angel,” Charlie says hesitantly. “So! I took those... experiences... into account while creating this one!” Lucifer shifts uncomfortably in his seat. He was a huge fan of Charlie living out her dream, but he wasn’t a huge fan of having to be this close to the action. He lets out a small sigh. I can’t abandon my place as her dad again. Charlie paused for a moment to reach into a bag and hand a bundle of items to Vaggie. Small strips of paper and markers. As Vaggie started passing them out to each of them, Charlie explains. “First thing’s first, I need everyone to write their names down. Once you’ve written your name, please give your paper to Vaggie.”

Lucifer’s anxiety starts up, as it always does when he’s involved in one of his daughter’s ‘family’ activities. He just hopes whatever comes of this involves less property damage than before. He hands his paper back to Vaggie as she walks around to collect them. Giving the papers back to her partner, Vaggie continues the instructions. “You will now each receive a randomly chosen name. The name on your paper will be for your eyes and your eyes only. Do not tell anyone else the name that you got.” Charlie excitedly passes the papers back out, now folded shut. “Except for me!” she interrupts. “I’m going to make a note of who gets who for the sole purpose of understanding the effectiveness of this activity. Don’t worry, no one else will get to see!” Her smile is infectious, Lucifer just can’t help it. He always smiles when he sees his daughter this way, so full of hope and joy. Vaggie hands him a folded strip of paper. Before he can open it to see who he was assigned, Charlie speaks again.

“Now, unlike some of our previous attempts, this activity will not be done as a group.” Multiple sighs of relief are heard, and Lucifer notices that Alastor seems to relax ever so slightly. At least that’s one thing we can agree on... “However,” Charlie continues, “This will be a week-long exercise-” multiple groans again, “that will involve a prompt each morning. That prompt will be a question or instruction that each of you will respond to in a letter. The letters don’t have to be long, but must include a full response to the prompt. They don’t have to be short either, just go for whatever your honest answer is!” She’s practically bouncing up and down with excitement as she says “The recipient of what you’ll be writing for the week will be the name on the paper youve been given. You’ll have a full 24 hours to write your letters. Tomorrow you’ll hand them in to me during the morning meeting, and will then be given the next prompt. Any questions so far?”

All of them are silent for a long moment. Vaggie breaks the silence. “Here are the rules. Rule number one: You MUST be respectful. OUR version of respectful. No insults, no petty jabs. Just answer the prompt. Rule number two: No discussing who each person is writing to. I mean NO discussion. Do not ask, do not tell. If we find out that this rule is broken, the offending parties will be sitting in on Charlie’s hotel-wide group therapy sessions for a month.” Lucifer’s eyes went wide at this. Several others did as well. Group therapy wasn't an uncommon ‘punishment’ (though Charlie wont ever call it that) but the sessions are held four days out of the week and last for one to two hours at a time. And with new arrivals slowly trickling into the hotel to be redeemed, the sessions were getting larger. Lucifer tensed, thinking of the last time he was forced to participate after getting into a spat with the only sinner in the building he just couldn’t stand to be around. Lucifer was not meant for group therapy, that was for sure. The most any of them have been forced to attend for bad behavior was one week. None of them wanted a whole month.

Vaggie looked amused at the group’s reaction to this. She spoke again. “This also includes revealing yourself to the person you’re writing to. These letters are supposed to be anonymous.” Charlie speaks up. “This exercise depends on honesty and anonymity, and I have really high hopes that this one can be used by new residents learning to redeem themselves.” She pauses. “Okay. So now that we’ve gone over everything, I’m going to call each of you over to note down who you’ll be writing to. I’ll then give you a paper with today’s writing prompt and an envelope to put the letter in once you're done. Make sure to seal it! After that, bring your envelope with you for tomorrow’s meeting and I’ll mark the intended recipient on the front. At the end of our meeting you’ll get the letter addressed to you and the next writing prompt.”

All of this information takes a moment to register in Lucifer’s head, but after he’s gone over it all in his mind he’s left with a sense of pride for his daughter. Out of all of her experiments so far, this one is the first that Lucifer doesnt think would turn into an all out war. It seems... feasible. He smiles as she makes eye contact with him, clearly ecstatic with her plan. Vaggie calls each one of them over to the desk that Charlie has against the room’s far wall. One at a time, each member of the ‘family’ does as they’re told and then leaves the meeting room. Lucifer spends a moment wondering who got his slip of paper, the one with his name written on it, until he suddenly remembers that he never looked at his own intended letter recipient. With no one close enough to peer over his shoulder, Lucifer slowly opens up the folded paper to see whose name is written.

Of course. Go figure. Yeah, why not just make the next week my own little slice of Hell? I mean honestly- His thoughts are interrupted by Charlie’s voice. “Dad! It’s your turn!” He looks up and realizes he’s the last one to be called. Everyone else, save Charlie and Vaggie, have already left the room. He attempts to smile as he stands and faces his daughter, but she sees through it immediately. And it's obvious. “Come on Dad... I know who you got.” This surprises him. Was his face really that revealing? “Everyone else’s name has already been marked on my chart, so...” She smiles awkwardly. “Listen, I think this will be good for you! Please, just try your best?” Lucifer slowly walks to the desk and sighs heavily. “Anything for you, sunshine. I’ll try my hardest.” He hands the strip of paper to his daughter and she gives him the paper with the prompt and envelope in exchange. “I dont think I’ve got you on the chores schedule today, but I’m gonna be pretty busy so I probably won’t see you until dinner.” She smiles at him, that glowing warm smile that he’d missed out on for so many years. She encourages him with an “I love you, Dad. You’re gonna do great!” and gives him a thumbs up.

He leaves the room smiling, just loving being in his daughter’s presence, until he walks into the lobby and sees him. Sitting on one of the many comfy chairs, sipping black coffee out of a mug that says “Oh Deer” on the side. The asshole. The worst demon in the hotel. The piece of shit that loves to torment Lucifer to no end. The name on his strip of paper. He strides by as quickly as possible to avoid any contact. Damn it... He thinks on the way back to his side of the hotel. Why, of all people... He can’t get the vision of the neat, cursive handwriting out of his head. His mind focuses on one name and one name only.

Alastor

Read Chapter 2!

#hazbin hotel #radioapple #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel alastor #fanfic #mine #Do You Want To Know

43 notes · View notes

tw-inkl-e-tit-s · 10 months

Text

𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬 | M.T

Mason Thames x Fem!Reader

Word count: 2.9k

Type: Angst

Warnings: Cussing, Mentions of rejection, Mason in another relationship and reader being jealous, Promis ring, Maddy being a really good friend and crying

A/N: This is my first Mason fic so I hope you like it! <3

|Mason Thames Masterlist

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

𝒀/𝒏'𝒔 𝑷𝒐𝒗

I couldn't stop myself from looking at them, The way she would playfully hit his arm when he said something dumb, The way she would make him laugh by doing something so simple, The way they looked into each other's eyes, and the way they kissed. Just like we used to.

I missed him more than anything, I missed staying up late at night and talking over the phone with him, I missed how his warm arms would wrap around me in a 'friendly' hug, I missed holding hands with him and cuddling because we were both so touch-deprived, I missed the feeling of his warm lips on mine and the way he gripped my waist, but most of all I missed just having him.

I gathered my things and left the house, I sighed as I got into my car.

My friend Maddy had planned a surprise party for me since my new movie was coming out next week, I wanted to stay for her but I just couldn't be around him and her, I love Maddy and I'm most defiantly getting scolded by her later for leaving so early but she would understand, I hope.

I put my seat belt on and placed my key in the ignition.

I was about to pull off when I heard a knock on the window, I looked over to see a not-so-very-happy Madeleine McGraw, I rolled down my window and she glared at me with her arms crossed.

"Where do you think you're going?" She asked

"Home," I bluntly said

"No, you're getting your ass back in that house, and you're gonna have fun," She said trying to open my door, I quickly locked it so she couldn't, She glared at me once more

"Get. In. The. House," She said, I shook my head looking down

"Y/n, you can not keep letting him control your life, I wish I could say fuck him but he is also my friend," She said, I felt bad since I didn't want her to feel Switzerland

"I just can't look at him right now Maddy," I said, feeling the tears threatening to spill

"I understand that Y/n/n, but you have to look at him eventually, and her, they are together," She said, looking at me with a sympathetic look, I nodded my head getting out of the car and putting my keys back in my purse she grabbed my hand as we walked back into the house.

When we got in Brady came over to me with his arms open and Tristan following close behind him. "Y/n, Just the girl I wanted to see!" He shouted, pulling me into a hug which I gladly accepted, We pulled away and Tristan hugged me as well.

"So, how have you been?" Brady asked, taking a sip of his drink

"I've been good, but busy," I said, he laughed nodding his head

"Yeah, I'm so excited to see your new movie!" He said, smiling at me

"I'm ready for it to come out, I can't wait for you guys to see it," I said, already feeling loved, We continued to chat for a while about my movie and Madeleine's movie coming out soon and just random things.

I loved hanging out with my friends, we always did fun stuff together, and we were always there for each other when one of us needed it most, I couldn't ask for better friends, for a better family.

"Oh my god! Hi y/n!" I heard someone shout, and before I knew it I was being pulled into a tight hug, I looked up to see her, Tall, skinny, with long wavy black hair, and beautiful green eyes.

She was everything a man dreamed of in a woman, and she looked like Megan Fox so I guess she had that going for her at the start.

"Hey, how are you doing, Stella?" I asked, smiling at her

"I have been great, Me and Mason went on a date last night, and guess what? He gave me a promise ring!" She said, showing me her hand in excitement.

I smiled as I looked at the beautiful diamond on her hand "Bit much for a promise ring," I thought.

I nodded my head smiling at her, She pulled her hand away grabbing onto Mason's arm, I didn't even see him standing there, Shouldnt be surprised, where ever she goes he follows.

He looked everywhere but at me, it hurt knowing he didn't want to look at me either. I wish I could go back in time and change what happened.

𝑭𝑳𝑨𝑺𝑯𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑲

"Y/N WHERE ARE YOU!!??" I heard someone shout from down the hallway, I smiled knowing who it was already my door then opened reviling my bestfriend, Mason, He shut my door and ran over to me jumping on my bed and pulling me into a tight hug, I laughed as I tried pushing him off me.

"Mason get, OFF!" I shouted, laughing as he began tickling my sides

"I missed you," He said, pinning my hands above my head, looking down at me I looked up at him smiling, and he leaned in closer and closer, I freaked out and flipped him over causing his back to bounce on my mattress.

I got up and put on my shoes and grabbed my phone and bag, I turned to look at him, he looked a little down but he quickly replaced it with a bright smile.

"Ready to go?" He asked, getting off my bed and walking towards me, I nodded my head walking out of my room and down the stairs

"LAST ONE TO THE CAR IS GAY!!" He shouted, pushing me out of the way and running to the car

I shook my head laughing as I walked out of the house to see Mason in the passenger seat of Miguel's truck, they both rolled down the sunroof and stuck their heads out,

"HURRY UP BITCH!!" They both shouted, I rolled my eyes flipping them off. I opened the back door seeing Maddy sitting in the back on her phone, She smiled at me as I got in and closed the door.

"Finally, I thought yall was fucking in there," Miguel said, pulling out of my driveway

I smacked the back of his head causing him to jerk the truck, He looked in the review mirror and glared at me.

"BITCH DON'T HIT MY FUCKING HEAD," He shouted, causing us all to laugh

"Shut up I got good news!" Mason said

"I got a date tomorrow night," He said, smiling from ear to ear, and it felt like someone stabbed me with a hot iron

"Good for you man!" Miguel beamed, patting Mason on the back

Maddy just patted him on the back as well and smiled, I nodded my head and looked out the window, "I would rather be anywhere else right now than in this moment," I thought

We got to the arcade and went in getting our wristbands on.

I and Maddy ran to the photobooth while Mason and Miguel ran to the basketball hoops.

I and Maddy took a bunch of pictures together and then decided to go play some go-kart, We walked over seeing Mason and Miguel getting off, and they waved us over. "We need food," Mason whined, Maddy laughed and I just nodded

"You good Y/n/n?" Miguel asked, sounding worried, I nodded my head smiling causing Maddy and Mason to look at me weirdly as well, We walked to the food court and just decided on Chic-fil-a, Maddy and Miguel had already ordered their food and were just waiting on me and Mason.

"I don't know what to get," Mason whined as he looked at the menu, I sighed rolling my eyes, He looked at me and furrowed his eyebrows

"Are you sure you're alright?" He asked, I glared at him as I rolled my eyes again

"If someone asks me if I'm alright again I'm going to kill them!" I shouted, walking to the bathroom

I walked into the bathroom, I stood in front of the mirror and looked at myself. I grabbed my purse and got my lip gloss out and replied it to my lips. I heard the bathroom door open, I assumed it was just a random person but I saw Maddy turn the corner, She looked at me and sighed.

"What's going on?" She asked, walking beside me

"Nothing," I said bluntly

"Don't say that, there is obviously something going on," She said

"I'm fine Maddy, Seriously," I said, placing on a fake smile

she rolled her eyes and hopped up on the counter, "I'm not stupid, Y/n," She said

"What?" I asked

"I know you like Mason," She said, I shook my head laughing at her

"There is no use in denying it, I saw the way you looked after he said he had a date tonight," She said, I sighed leaning on the wall, You can never hide anything from Maddy

"Oh well," I said, putting my lipgloss back into my bag

"Oh well?" She asked, looking at me like I was crazy

"Y/n, you need to tell him how you feel, He probably feels the same," She said

"No way, Hell no," I said, shaking my head

"Come on Y/n, I've seen the way he looks at you," She said

"He looks at me a certain way?" I thought

"Fine, but if he doesn't feel the same, I'm coming for you Maddy," I said, glaring at her, she smiled giving me a hug

"Come on, our food is waiting," She said, grabbing my hand and walking out of the bathroom

"Hey!" Mason shouted, walking up to me, Maddy winked at me and went to sit with Miguel

"What's up?" I asked, He rubbed the back of his neck

"Are you- you know," He said, looking me up and down

I smiled as I nodded my head, "Yes, I'm fine Mason," I said, laughing

He laughed as well, "What got you so upset If you don't mind me asking?" He asked, How was I supposed to tell him I was jealous he was going out with some girl tonight? I just need to tell him and not sugarcoat it.

"Uh- I need to tell you something Mason," I said, looking up at him, He smiled and nodded his head

"I have had a crush on you ever since we meet and I really like you, I think you are so sweet and so funny, and I love how much you care for other people. I know you have a date tonight but, I just wanted to let you know before you guys got together or whatever, then it would be awkward," I said, He looked surprised and he wasn't saying anything

I panicked, "Oh no you aren't saying anything, it's awkward now huh?" I asked, wishing I never said anything, to begin with

"I- uh- um- w-why are you just telling me this now?" He asked, taking a deep breath

"I don't know Mason, Maddy told me to tell you, I guess I'm too late," I said, looking down

Mason took a deep breath and grabbed my hands causing me to look up at him, "Look Y/n, I think you are an extremely cool person and you deserve a really great guy, but I'm afraid that's not me, I'm sorry Y/n, but I don't feel the same and I hope you are okay with that," He said

My heart stopped, it felt like all of time stopped and everything was in slow-mo. I felt the tears behind my eyes threatening to spill, and my throat burned from restraint, My hands shook as I let go of his, I smiled trying to show it didn't affect me, but I needed to get out of there before I fall to the floor and have a breakdown.

"I'm fine with that, I hope she's the one buddy," I said, cringing at myself, I caught glimpses of Maddy and Miguel, assuming they already could tell by the look on my face, they felt sorry.

I looked at Mason once more before leaving

𝑻𝑰𝑴𝑬𝑺𝑲𝑰𝑷

I sat on the bench in the parking lot waiting for my Uber, which was taking a painfully long time to arrive. I never wanted to get home so bad then right now, I was so embarrassed and I wanted to crawl into my bed and never come out of my room ever again.

"Y/N!!" I heard, I looked over to see Mason jogging towards me, I rolled my eyes continuing to stare at the ground, haven't you embarrassed me enough?

I felt him sit down beside me, it was silent for a couple of minutes before he decided to speak up, "I'm sorry I was so harsh about it," He said, laying his hand beside mine, I moved my hand and laid it in my lap.

"Look Y/n, I still wanna be friends, we can just forget all this happened," He said, bouncing his leg up and down, I looked at him and he looked at me smiling gently, I couldn't help but smile as well, god I loved his smile.

I couldn't just forget about this, or my feeling for him, trust me I've tried.

"I'll try my best," I said, he nodded his head, holding his arms out for a hug

"Hug?" He asked, smiling, I nodded my head giving him a hug

He felt so warm and smelled so nice, I felt his grip tighten around me and I melted even more into him, I felt him gently kiss the top of my head, I furrowed my brows quickly looking up at him, his face flushed red as he looked away, his arms still holding me tight.

"What was that for?" I asked, he looked back down at me

"What?" He asked, trying to play dumb, but I could see right through him

He looked at me with soft eyes, he leaned in inch by inch closing the space between us. I knew it was wrong to not pull away, and I knew he didn't mean it, my feeling are just gonna get hurt even more.

He finally closed the space between us, he placed one hand on my face and the other on my waist, and his hand slid down to my jaw pulling me closer to him and deepening the kiss, I placed both my hands in his hair pulling in the messy curls.

We both pulled away trying to catch our breath, He removed his hands from my waist and quickly stood up, "I'm so sorry," He said, awkwardly looking around

I furrowed my brows, what did he mean he was sorry, he clearly felt the same, right?

"I didn't mean to, I just- fuck I'm so sorry," He said, rubbing his face

I finally realized he didn't feel the same, he just kissed because he wanted to. what the fuck was I to him!? I quickly stood up hitting his shoulder, causing him to stumble backward,

"Why would you do that? How could you play with my feelings like that!?" I whisper shouted, he looked at me with guilt swirling in his eyes

"It was a heat of the moment thing, I'm sorry!" He said, trying to grab my hand, I quickly jerked it away

"Don't fucking touch me," I said, my words dripping with venom

I heard a honk from beside me, I looked over to see a guy looking around with a confused look. I looked back at Mason who was looking down at the ground.

"Look, we can take you home, I'm really sorry," He whispered, looking up at me

"Don't ever talk to me again," I said, as I got up and walked over to the car, the guy looked over at me and raised his brow

"Who are you here to pick up?" I asked

"I'm here to pick up, Y/n Y/l/n," He said

"That's me," I said as I opened the car and sat down

I looked back to see Mason frantically waving his hands around as he talked to Maddy and Miguel who were staring right at me, I rolled my eyes and the Uber driver took off.

𝑬𝑵𝑫 𝑶𝑭 𝑭𝑳𝑨𝑺𝑯𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑲

I smiled as I looked at the couple in front of me, I was still salty that Mason didn't like me back but I am glad he found somebody he was happy with, he did look happy, the way he looked at her was the way we used to look at each other when we would be in my room, and laying on my bed as we told each other about our day.

I was defiantly going to miss Mason, but I need to just accept my fate and move on and find someone who actually likes me, I'm gonna miss Mason but at least he gets a happy ending.

I could learn to be happy for them, and not be bitter every time they entered a room holding each other's hand or kissing one another.

I will miss looking into those beautiful eyes that pulled me in and trapped me, I will miss the way his plush, warm lips felt on mine, they felt like they belonged together, but he belongs to someone else now, and I have to learn to accept that.

We were just two star-crossed lovers.

Taglist: @joycrist @wandamilf @ophelialigh @atomicprincessangel

if you would like to be added to the taglist let me know!

#: ̗̀➛ MasonThames✩#mason thames #masonthamesxreader #masonthamesimagines #finney blake x reader #finney x reader #tbp finney #finney blake #the black phone x you #the black phone #tbp #robin arellano x reader

106 notes · View notes

stormoflina · 3 months

Note

https://rtl.hu/reggeli/2024/02/09/szoboszlai-dominik-tetovalas-torocsik-dani

Thank you so much.

So I finished it earlier than I thought, here it is!

TLDR: Dominik's tattoo artist talking about meeting Dominik, their friendship and most especially, his brand new chest tattoo and the ideas behind it to two hosts of a Hungarian morning show.

Long intro from the journalists, the only important info is that they mention how due to the request of Dominik’s family they can only ask about certain topics, because it’s a rather intimate matter. Then the male journalist asks about how the artist got there, was it difficult bringing his own stuff to Dominik’s house.

Tattoo Artist: “ It would have been difficult to gather everything that is needed for making a tattoo and bringing them all with me [to Dominik’s house], so we basically made a ‘studio’ at Dominik’s and that’s how it was done. We ordered what was needed online to his house, and when he had free time on certain days, we worked on the tattoo on his chest.”

Female Journalist: “We know that you can’t say much and neither do we want you to speak in Dominik’s name, so please only tell us what you are allowed to…”

TA: “Just ask me!”

FJ: “Yeah, okay (...) So, what was Dominik’s wish, what did he want?”

TA: “Well, I guess this is a question that can be labeled as private, but perhaps Dominik won’t get mad at me if I tell you guys broadly. What he had in mind is to have a tattoo that can represent and show his journey, his very difficult, but so far successful journey he has been on from the moment he was born, from the moment he started playing football. And also his mentality, what was needed for his journey, that’s what he wanted to have on his skin, inked on, in the form of pictures. Basically, it’s a tool to tell a story, his story. Reading from left to right, starting from the moment he was born to, well, who knows, nobody knows until when, that’s what the stars and planets are meant to symbolize.”

MJ: “It looks very cool, and of course, it looks beautiful on Dominik. (...) How much did it take to complete it, how many hours are needed to make a tattoo [like this one]?”

TA: “Finally, a good question! Good that you asked in hours, because it's easier to answer. We only had certain parts of a day, and he wasn’t always available. so we had to work with that. All in all, it took like 3 days… We had once a 10 hour long session, and I think two 6(ish) hours long ones. All in all, it was like 26 hours.”

FJ: “We know that this story went viral (...) that you have been contacted by many journalists (...), so we are thankful that this is your first interview, and that you chose us. Still, it’s a huge deal that you had the chance to work together with such a big star like Dominik, we know how famous he got (...). Did you know each other from before, or was this your first time meeting him?”

TA: “ Yeah, we do. I will confess, I didn’t think that this would blow up the way it did. I mean, like, I have a good relationship with Dominik, so in my head he is (...) I mean, obviously, I respect him and admire him for what he has achieved, but still, we have a private relationship. So, I didn’t even consider that if I post his tattoo, even the English media will find out about it and report about it, because that’s what happened… Yeah, I have known him ever since he signed for Leipzig. At first, he contacted me, because he wanted a correction for one of his tattoos. I met him for the first time when he was still playing for RB Leipzig.

MJ: “You mentioned how many hours it took to get it done (...), during those hours do you ask him about stuff, trying to have a conversation, or rather sit in silence, listen to music (...) how does it work? Have you found out any behind the scenes secrets?”

TA: “ No. No, because for him, you know, it’s about relaxation. I mean, even if he doesn’t want it, we were together for 3 days constantly. Even if you are forced to be with your best friend in the world that amount of time, being as close to each other as like 5-10 centimeters, face-to-face, it can get a lot. We had a friendly conversation, I’m not trying to ask him for information (...), of course we talked about stuff, a lot of stuff, I will not say we didn’t, but I didn’t spend my 3 days with him trying to get information out from him.”

The rest of the video was about his personal and work life, where he is currently, career, etc, nothing else about Dominik.

#dominik szoboszlai #domi tattoo #domi translation

35 notes · View notes

apollodarling-writes · 6 months

Note

I've being wondering about this for a while. I didn't think it, but turns out silva and kikyo do actually love each other. So killua probably grew up seeing those expressions of "love" and thinking that's normal for a relationship. How do you think that would affect his relationship with reader? And if it isn't too much, how do you think his overall experience with his family effects it? Because I highly doubt after everything he's gone through that his relationship with the reader would be perfectly normal. What're your thoughts?

before i delve into killua’s experiences, i wanna go into the psychology of a developing brain. especially during the most critical stages — from birth to five years old. according to vygotsky’s theory of child development, a child’s environment and external factors play a huge role in how a child develops as a person. he proposed that as a child, your brain is continuously learning and soaking up information. for example, right from wrong, how to treat other people, whats socially acceptable, etc etc. essentially, vygotsky believes that this stage of development is critical for how your brain functions as an adult, and that external influences play the biggest role.

now that we have that mini psychology lesson out of the way, let’s hop into how i think killua’s environment and seeing how his family treated each other affected him.

i dont know much about kiyoko and silva’s marriage so i can’t really speak on that, but based on the fact that they love each other and their kids, i can assume and speak on a few things.

firstly, killua grew up in an assassin family. he was trained from a very, very young age — most likely from when he could walk — and was required to develop an immunity to all poisons and be able to complete missions quickly and efficiently. from that, i can gather that he was trained very harshly and most likely learned to associate love with pain of some sort. i have no doubt that developing an immunity to all poisons was painful and extremely distressing for a child. this would likely shut down some pathways and cognitive processing that a child in a normal household would have.

i would also like to take illumi and kiyoko’s influence in killua’s life into consideration. illumi was extremely overprotective and manipulative, and even placed a needle in killua to control him. kiyoko was overbearing with her love for killua and, to my knowledge, always had an eye on him in some form.

now that we’ve taken developmental psychology into account, his family’s influence and behavior, and his assassin training, i can now go into how it affects him in his love life.

it has definitely affected him in some form, but also he now has gon to show him whats healthy. killua very clearly has expressed his distaste for his family, but i think that this is so deeply rooted in his brain that it would affect him for the rest of his life. and even if he did realize that it was wrong, i don’t think he would want to stop — self-indulgence at its finest. i think he rationalizes it as “my family did it this way so why would it be that bad” and “different people have different tatses”.

as for how it affects his relationship with the reader, he would be completely out of reach. both on a physical scale and a psychological scale. as an assassin, hes immune to all poisons and the reader has no chance of physically overpowering him — the only option would be to run but even then you wouldn’t be able to forever. you also have no hopes of “fixing” him. theres a very clear distinction, depending on how the reader was raised and their own tastes for love, between his views on love and theirs. at that point, you would have to live with his overbearing, self indulgent, over protective, and manipulative behavior. you’d honestly be trapped. just hope stockholm syndrome kicks in fast.

#male yandere #tw yandere #yandere hxh #yandere drabble #yandere killua #yandere killua hcs #hunter x hunter killua #killua x y/n #killua x you #killua x reader #hxh killua #killua zoldyck #killua hunter x hunter #killua headcanons #killua hxh #tw aged up #aged up killua #aged up characters

99 notes · View notes

blue-howlite · 1 year

Text

Being their significant other headcanons, Dislyte edition.

Feat. Li Ling, Falken, Yun Chuan, Long Mian.

Author note: the first three were requested, the other was added by me for fun. The request for Falken asked for a shy reader but I'm doing really general headcanons here. Buuuuut... Yes I did change his headcanons a bit to fit the request. Also I wrote all this in the most gender neutral way possible, so anyone can enjoy it.

Twigger warnings: none? Maybe Long Mian being the most possessive man on Earth, but it was expected. Oh you can imagine some nsfw situations if you really try, but nothing mentioned here was meant to be nsfw.

Li Ling

You got in a relationship with this walking- floating menace. I'm not going to ask how.

He probably started floating around you a lot, showing off his powers to you until you asked him out because you thought he was flirting. He was not, but now he's glad you thought he was.

Anyway here we are!

First off, let's bust a myth. You know the "If there's something I can't stand is dumb rules"? Well, that doesn't really apply to you.

He might tease you sometimes, but he will never, ever cross your boundaries.

He respects you and you're one of the few people that can make him behave.

And this leads to another of his quotes.

"If you have something to say, you better have the power to back it up", right?

Well, he's your power to back it up. Doesn't matter if you're a normal person, and Esper, if you're in the Union or not, if you have a problem it is now also his problem and he'll back you up.

Yes this did lead to some accidents a few times but it's alright, the other person was always left alive.

Now the important part.

Six arms.

You think he's not going to use them?

No matter where you two are, his hands are always on you. Maybe one is on your shoulder, or on your waist, or holding your hand.

Anyway, if you're not comfortable with that he'll respect you. As I said earlier, he's respecting your boundaries, no matter how hard he wishes to squeeze you in a hug.

But he will lift you up at the most random times with his extra arms. And carry you around like a backpack. Like if he has somewhere to be and he wants you to be with him he won't talk, he'll just take you with him. You'll get used to it.

He isn't really possessive nor gets jealous easily. Probably because no one would dare try anything with you since you're with him. Bonus if you're strong enough that your fame alone is what keeps others from approaching you, Li Ling likes strong people.

Cuddles? Yes please. I feel like since most of his physical contact with others is through punches he's actually very cuddly. And he gives bear hugs. No I won't elaborate.

You're not a fan of physical contact? Cool, then you can do activities together! Maybe he can teach you how to cook meals typical of Tangton, or his family recipes! (Good luck if you're not a spicy food person.)

Pet names? He'll probably use your name more often, but "Babe" and "Sweetheart" are also good options.

And if you try to give him pet names he'll probably go 'uno reverse' and use them on you instead.

He's such a menace.

But he's your menace.

Falken

It all starts with you, who somehow you caught his attention, through an action or a particular feature you have, and now he's thinking about it. But what does Falken do when he thinks? He zones out.

So the first time you catch him staring at you and he doesn't even look away, you'll probably panic a little, thinking you did something wrong. He's an Union Commander after all, if he stares at someone there must be a valid reason, right? So you gather your courage and ask him what's wrong.

When he realizes that he's been staring you can bet he's embarrassed. Like a lot. He usually stares at things or animals, not people. And he'll notice you're a bit agitated now.

Him apologizing for making you uncomfortable is a great conversation starter though, he'll explain why he was staring and so you'll start talking. You become friends.

And soon you start dating. I'm positive Falken has some experience with love and so he recognizes the feeling that makes him zone out whenever he sees you, so he'll confess.

He's very focused on his work, but he keeps his life balanced so that he has time both for his duty as an Union Commander and as your boyfriend

Sometimes he might take some things for granted, like you enjoying PDA or physical contact. Please tell him if he crosses any boundaries, he'll be sure not to let it happen again.

That doesn't mean he'll take you for granted though. He loves you and cherishes you, he just needs help learning about you.

Which is something he really enjoys by the way.

If you happen to tell him about an interest or a preference of yours he will commit it to memory, even if it doesn't seem important at the moment.

If you have trouble speaking up for yourself he'll make sure to be by your side and help you. Not help you as in speaking for you, rather encouraging you overcoming your shyness and speaking for yourself.

Of course if you're actually unable to he'll just do it for you, but you can bet he's going to help you get better at it later.

It's not that he sees shyness as a bad thing, but he knows that sometimes it can get in the way and be an issue for you. He's okay with you being shy, as long as it doesn't stop you from being respected.

He doesn't get jealous but I see him as a bit possessive. Not possessive as in "you're mine", more as in "you're precious to me and I want to cherish and protect you". Like you're his but that's not the main point to him.

Oh you can count on him if someone makes you uncomfortable though. Guys/gals/hoes trying to hit on you? The "Eye of Horus" is on them and if stares could kill that person would be six feet under already.

Pet names? "Love" is the one he uses the most, "Dear" is for when he's back from a mission or he's tired after a long day of work.

He'll let you give him any pet name you want, as long as they make sense and aren't excessively ridiculous.

He just loves you and wishes to always be there for you.

Yun Chuan

Ohhhh boy, another menace. But a sweet menace.

So, how do you get the scary dog privileges? Well, the moment Screamer understands Yun Chuan is into you, that's when the fun starts.

Screamer is his wing man you can't tell me otherwise. He will get in your way so that you stumble on him and his master can catch you in his arms when you fall. He'll jump on you, pushing you against his master. Yun Chuan will apologize to you a lot about it but Screamer won't stop it, until one day his master finally confesses to you.

And you got the scary dogs privileges!

Yun Chuan will take you to befriend the Jagalions, that's for sure. Even if you're not a fighter he will teach you how to train with them and interact with them. Let's imagine that Jagalions don't trigger allergies so that even the allergy people can enjoy this.

Now, what about boundaries?

Of course he respects them. The funny thing is, he might even over-respect them.

He'll always ask if you're okay with anything, be it holding hands or kissing you. Especially in public, he will ask every single time for permission.

It's not that he doesn't like it, he loves giving you affection, he just wants to make sure you're comfortable with it.

He likes hugging you though. He is the master of bear hugs. Hugs in general. He will lift you from the ground while hugging you, no matter your size or height.

And about that.

This man is the best when it comes to body positivity. Like he will love your body for you and teach you how to love it as well.

Of course if you decide to work out he will take you to the Jagalions with him and you'll train together, but only if you're doing it because you want to, not because you feel pressured to.

No but like for real, doesn't matter if it's about a skin, hair or eye condition, or your weight, Yun Chuan will make sure you know he loves you as you are.

Possessive. A lot. In the "They're mine" way. If he's not with you then Screamer is. But he's also shy about it, he'll never admit to it. He's just making sure you're always safe, that's all. Even if you're a powerful Esper you might need assistance, right? Don't mind Screamer getting literally between you and whoever you are talking to, he's just making sure you're alright!

Rather than pet names he likes short versions of your name. He's not very good at pet names.

You can give him any pet name you want. He doesn't really get them but go ahead, have fun with it! But prefers when you call his name 100% of the time.

He might be awkward at times, like if for some reason you show a lot of skin (even though this man is barely covering his own shoulders), but it's just because he loves you and he doesn't want to hurt you in any way.

Long Mian

Because he likes collecting Miramon and creatures he deems unique, he's probably been watching you for a while and his first thought was to freeze you and put you in his collection room.

But! Then you made a different expression from the one you were making a moment ago! Maybe he could freeze you with that.

Your pose changed too! Oh no!

Once he realises that you have too many expressions and different poses, he decides to give you a few days and watch you, in order to decide how you would look best as an ice statue. He even starts talking to you, to see up close your facial features and watch them change with every expression you make.

He gives you a few more weeks, thinking that he needs to choose carefully.

And this plan backfires. He realizes he won't be able to hear your voice if he freezes you. And he likes your voice. He likes talking with you. He likes you.

This annoys him to no end, and he won't admit that he fell for you. But he still desires you, he wants you to be his.

After explaining to him that he can't force you to live in his collection room, you somehow agree to start dating. This way you're his and he'll still get to talk to you and spend time with you. Perfect solution, right?

...

He doesn't know how a relationship works. If it was up to him, you'd never leave his side, but you'll have to teach him that sometimes you have other things to do or that you need space.

He'll see you as something he owns and has to protect for a while at the beginning of the relationship. It will take an active effort from you to make him see you as an equal and not a collection item.

He'll come around I promise, he just needs time to understand his feelings and the fact that he does indeed love you.

Once he figures it out though, you're done for, because he will realize that others as well might develop feelings for you. He will make sure they know you are his beloved. Your neck is now covered in purple bruises and bite marks, he didn't mean to hurt you but don't you look beautiful like this?

Work on boundaries, he'll respect them once he understands why they're important for you. Which might take some time.

It's not that he will just do whatever he wants, he knows what 'No' means. He just won't bother asking, you'll have to say it first.

Loves you a lot though. The fact that he can't just freeze you and call it a day means that the time you two have is far more precious than what he has with the pieces in his collection. He treasures you, really.

He will make sure you know he loves you. Long Mian is self aware, he knows he often acts cold, but he doesn't want you to mistake his coldness for lack of love in your regards. So he always smiles a bit more with you and often tells you that he loves you.

Sometimes he'll just come up to you, kiss you, then go back to whatever he was doing.

He is touch starved, fight me.

He doesn't just like cuddling, he's addicted to it now. He just needs your body pressed against his, your warmth against his cold touch.

Did I already say he loves your voice?

Talk to him when you're together, sing if you want, read to him, just let him hear you. Whatever he's doing just let him hear your voice, let him know that you're here.

If you're sleeping he will come and lay his head on your chest to hear your heartbeat. He just needs to know that you're alive and well.

Pet names for you? Anything which he can put "My" in front of. "My love", "My dear", "My treasure", and so on.

For him? Just call him by his name. But if you really want to make him lose it (in a good way), put "My" first. Play his own game on him. He'll love it.

It is a complicated relationship and making it work requires a lot of effort from both sides, but it's worth it.

#Dislyte #Dislyte x reader #Li Ling #Li Ling x reader #Falken #Falken x reader #Yun Chuan #Yun Chuan x reader #Long Mian #Long Mian x reader #look at this mfs (affectionately)#I had fun writing these #sorry if it's clear that I have favourites... can't help it #hope you guys like them just ask if you want more #sorry if they're ooc lol I tried

247 notes · View notes

just-sp-in-inginthevoid · 5 months

Text

Tokyo Revengers but Mikey has the same coping mechanism as Sunny (Omori)

It's an incomplete post so anyone can add things if they want!

'Manjiro' will be used to talk about irl!Mikey while 'Mikey' will refer to Headspace!Mikey

Sanzu is called Haruchiyo and takes on Basil's role (aKa he's important but Mikey doesn't want to either make him tag along/a member of the party or to confine him on the picnic blanket)

'Sanzu' would be The Stranger

Takemichi also has The Stranger role (in timelines where he truly left an impression on Mikey - so probably not in the first two unfortunately)

Shinichiro and Emma both play Mari's role

-> Shinichiro & Takemichi being the only one to call Mikey Manjiro

Senju and Izana share a common role (in Bonten)

The party is made of Toman founding members

Baji, Kazutora, Pah-chin have a dynamic similar to Aubrey and Kel

Draken takes on Hero's role, Mitsuya too, a bit

Draken is the one who takes pictures!!! (like in canon :) )

-> "Did I take this photo? Something about it feels so familiar... No... Emma, she's-"

(Draken has little flags to make Mikey (or other party members) happy during fights)

(Mitsuya is the one who can cook)

Unbread Twins = Kawata Twins (with their ramen shop ofc, no bakery here)

other members are a bit scattered everywhere, mostly the playground ofc (which is a mix of: Toman's gathering place, the playground Baji&Mikey used to play in as children with a huge jungle gym), and the garden and dojo in the Sano house)

There's also the beach which can be reached mostly by Toman members

There's a train but they move around in motorbikes (and Mucho's car)

Motor shop to fix the bikes! Shinichiro can be found there with other BD members :)! (for some reasons, Mikey doesn't like it when Baji and Kazutora are there, so they have to find alternatives to fix their bikes (most of the time they ask another party member to take their bike))

Somehow, Manjiro subconsciously remember the story of Taiyaki-kun so there's a lake where Taiyaki-kun lives (he wants to leave but he can't :( )

It's the dreamworld so everyone is happy and has good relationships with everyone else

Somwhere there's a plane. It doesn't fly, but it's there, lying on the ground. It mustn't broke. (when it does, it leads to Blackspace) (Sanzu always tries to lead Mikey here)

Manjiro/Mikey don't fear a lot of things but things that may upset/trigger them are: mirrors/any type of reflection; whenever he sees a plane (won't make him go back to Whitespace but it's really close sometimes); (people needing to go to the) hospitals (no matter if it's bc they're sick or badly hurt) & probably other things but they don't come to mind sorry

Mikey's 'Something' is just.. everyone. They're all horrifying in a different way, but each person Mikey has failed haunts him (emphasis on Izana & Senju during Bonten)

The Somethings telling him 'I love you' in Blackspace 🥹

Important flowers would be black lilies (curse), and red and white spider lilies at the very end :) (Red spider lilies symbolizing the inability to meet again, farewell, death, loss, abandonment and White spider lilies symbolizing rebirth, meeting (anew), purity)

Also poppies since in Hanakotoba they can symbolize fun-loving and success, and in the more Western flower language they symbolize peaceful sleep and death, remembrance/remembering the fallen and renewal/resurrection among other things

(not a flower professional - just did some google researches so be careful with what I'm saying)

Whitespace:

Old blanket

NES (that he irl has in his bedroom and must hold a lot of memories of family/friends game night)

Mewo being replaced by Peke-j? But Mikey is not close to Peke-j(/not that close from Chifuyu (unlike other ppl)) from what we know. Peke-j could also be used as a way to show how guilty Manjiro is about Baji (and Chifuyu? Kazutora?)

moto figurines laying around? Little flags?

Probably wouldn't have a laptop

The journal+drawings stay tho. He deserves to vent

Deserves to keep the tissue box and cry, too

Blackspace:

Mikey goes in and out of it; he never chooses if he pops up in Whitespace, Dreamworld or Blackspace. It depends on how is his mind irl. There are also some places where he can directly enter it (ex: whenever the Concorde is broken)

Haruchiyo keeps dying. Or having his lower jaw removed out of nowhere (also happens in headspace -> leads Mikey to go back to Whitespace on the spot)

If we do put Peke-j in this AU as Mewo replacement, which choice do you think Mikey would make in the Cat dissection room with our dear mister the Cat Butler? /genuine

The three first timeline are very similar. Senju and Haruchiyo/Sanzu have a lesser role here. In the 3rd/Bad Toman, Kazutora is here and is hurt less by Mikey (whereas if he ever is present in the two firsts, Mikey won't be merciful)

Manila:

"You loved them and you killed them. You should just die." — hits more in this timeline than any other

Rather than Manjiro completely loosing against Mikey; there's a feeling of acceptance at the end of their fight from both parts. They can't go back, but they can't go further either.

Plus, Manjiro never fought for a will to live to start with

Actually I'm not sure if there'd be a fight to start with

Izana, S62 & Kakucho are not present in the headspace of this timeline

Bonten:

there's an entire space dedicated to Senju and Izana. It's filled with always-falling snow and everlasting sakura; the party can make snowmen and other snow constructions! There's a pond with a giant majestic beta fish somewhere, too (maybe it could interact with Taiyaki-kun, maybe not)

Edit: They live in a snow castle

those two are either safe in this place (*cough* until the snow and sakura start to get tainted by blood out of nowhere and they disappear and the flowers wilt *cough* The snow melts a bit under the warmth of blood and suddenly it's less a childhood joy and more just... Hellishly cold. bc the cold refuses to leave ofc *cough*) or with Shinichiro and Emma on the picnic blanket. Kakucho is always found around Izana so he can be found in the snow, too! (He's the one staying there when Izana & Senju disappear; he's panicking and extremely worried)

*cough* canonical Oyasumi ending *cough*

Timeline where the Somethings are the most troublesome and present

eat irl then go puke in the toilet

sleeps less and sleeps badly

Kanto Manji & Final timeline:

Still developing, mostly Whitespace

Mikey and Manjiro are not two different entities yet - Manjiro is not at that point where he suppresses all of his traumas when he's in the Dreamworld as Mikey

not a great emphasis on Senju since she doesn't die, but she's still there, having a lesser role

Draken, on the other hand- (it doesn't last long anyway since he travels back in time no long after)(I mean. it's still three months so maybe it's a bit long)

The "I have to tell you something"-timeline/ending, if there has to be one

#i wanted to have more ideas but they arent coming to me :'d #tr headcanons #tokrev hcs #tokrev headcanons #how do i tag this #tr mikey #mikey sano #tr manjiro #tokrev manjiro #manjiro sano #tokyo revengers #tr #tokrev #tok rev #bonten mikey #manila mikey #omori

27 notes · View notes

talokanda-forever · 10 months

Text

THESE THOUGHTS HAVE BEEN PERCOLATING FOR A WHILE

This is a long one. My hope is to eventually distill this into a TikTok edit, but keeping things short and sweet is not my strong suit—obviously. But I also may not ultimately have the time. 😬 I must thank @cutelatinagirl for her recent “deep dive” posts. The way you’ve formatted them helped me gather my thoughts for this one.

When viewing the attacks and accusations made against Tenoch over the past few months ONLY within the context of his vocation as an actor, it doesn’t make much sense. It is illogical for the powers that be, with virtually unlimited influence and resources, to take time to not only insult him but degrade and dehumanize him on various social media platforms. He is an actor. Tenoch himself has stated he has no political power. He does not come from an influential family with a lot of money. And I know some tend to think because someone is an actor they must be ‘rich.’ I obviously have no visibility to Tenoch’s finances, but I’m going to hazard a guess that he doesn’t have a vault filled with gold coins that he swims in from time to time like Scrooge McDuck.

However, when viewing this coordinated smear campaign in the context of Tenoch’s social activism, it should not be surprising. Unfortunately, it should have been expected. We have seen this before in the US—most notably during the civil rights movement of the 60s and 70s.

I have often mused at how the conditions Tenoch so vividly conveys about racism/classism/colorism in Mexico seem to align with where we were in the US 60+ years ago. It is evident to me that he has actually studied our civil rights movement. Unlike today’s white-supremacy-denying politicians in the US who can only quote a couple of lines of Martin Luther King’s I Have a Dream speech as evidence that he would not have agreed with the Black Lives Matter movement (GTFOH).

Revisionist historians would have us think MLK was a universally beloved figure while he was still alive. That could not be further from the truth. You’d think his assassination would be enough evidence to the contrary, but nah. So how do mischaracterizations of history such as this get a foothold? Because those in control of the narrative decide what information is shared with the masses, and what remains obscured— and they do so BY DESIGN. Sounds an awful lot like what’s happening with Tenoch.

What is not widely disseminated is that the FBI took an active role in discrediting civil rights leaders in order to silence their voices and prevent their messages from mobilizing the masses.

The screenshot below was pulled from the ACLU website at this link:

I highlighted those portions that seem to apply most to what Tenoch is experiencing. Although the breaking up marriages bit doesn’t fully apply since he’s been divorced for some time, the accusations that have been made could very well have an impact on any current or future relationships. And don’t come at me with, “Well, these tactics were used in the US years ago and has nothing to do with Mexico in 2023.” This is more about human nature. The objective of the FBI is no different than the objective of a piece of shit billionaire media mogul. RETENTION OF POWER. The goal of employing such dirty tricks to take out those who are a threat is not restricted by an artificial, man-made border. And guess what? The FBI and CIA have had a presence throughout Latin America longer than most of our parents and grandparents have been alive, so don’t think their dirty tricks weren’t passed along to those nations. They have been in practice ever since. The people in power today are the offspring of those who were in power yesterday, whether by blood or in spirit.

COINTELPRO involved not only wiretapping, but as the investigation showed, attempts to disrupt, discredit, and defame perceived political radicals. Hoover targeted few figures as relentlessly as Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. (There is a similar fixation on Tenoch) The charge, Communist influence in the civil rights movement. FBI Director, Hoover:

Below is an excerpt of a transcript found on the NPR’s website about some of the activities by COINTELPRO specific to MLK. The full transcript can be found here:

(Soundbite of 1970s report)

Mr. J. EDGAR HOOVER (Former FBI Director): The Communist Party of America is doing everything in its power to steal the minds and the souls and the hearts of our young people. (Tenoch is constantly aiming in message to youth because the power to change the future lies with them)

CHIDEYA: In August of 1963, Reverend King gathered more than a quarter of a million Americans on the Mall in Washington to champion Civil Rights.

(Soundbite of 1970s report)

Rev. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. (Civil Rights leader): Free at last, free at last. Thank God, Almighty, we're free at last.

CHIDEYA: That march spurred Hoover to action. A little more than a month later, the FBI Director petitioned the Attorney General, then Robert F. Kennedy, to approve a wiretap on King's telephone. (High profile appearances by Tenoch are soon followed up with coordinated online attacks—see more on that below) Kennedy only agreed, according to his attorney Nicholas Katzenbach, in order to protect King.

(Soundbite of 1970s report)

Mr. NICHOLAS KATZENBACH (speaking as Robert F. Kennedy's attorney): He did not let Hoover tap King's wire. That would be used, really, as almost proof that King was being influenced by Communism. Bobby thought that if he tapped it he would find out that you were not.

CHIDEYA: And in fact, Kennedy was right. The Church Commission found that the wiretap showed that Dr. King did not support Communism. (Fabricated charges with no independently corroborated evidence) And that his two associates who may have been allied with the Communist party didn't influence King's views or his organization. (Associates (PP) are the offenders but Tenoch constantly gets pulled in by association and because of his visibility) But documents suggest that Hoover's campaign against King was as much personal as political. (Fixated on Tenoch like they’re chasing a white whale) And the rift between the two men deepened in 1964.

Although what’s going on with Tenoch shouldn’t be surprising, it doesn’t make it any less irrational. Why? Because it is rooted in FEAR of losing power. Actions rooted in fear many times don’t make sense on the surface. Those who have gained power through the covert and overt subjugation of marginalized communities must also find ways to maintain that power. Remember, those who owned plantations were outnumbered by the men and women they enslaved. But there was a SYSTEM in place that kept them terrorized, disoriented, and disorganized.

Tenoch is stirring the masses and he is doing so on an international level where Mexico’s cultural elites CANNOT CONTROL THE NARRATIVE.

As some have pointed out, like @cutelatinagirl in the Tweet below, the timing can’t be ignored. Neither can the reach of his message. Releasing statements on certain platforms only in English (MER’s response to Tenoch’s only public statement) and constantly @ing Disney speak to why they are so desperate to slander Tenoch in such a public manner. Truth and facts be damned. It doesn’t matter that they have no proof. They are willing to take the risk as long as they are successful in their primary objective of taking him down.

Also, let’s not forget about this year’s Festival Prieto. I recall comments linking Tenoch’s statements about Jesus being black with how Messiah-like he looked in the footage of him walking through the crowd to get to the stage (see the video below from a post by @luzsp9-1981 ). I tried to find the exact comment but couldn’t so I’m paraphrasing. For those of us who aren’t triggered by seeing Tenoch adored by fans—many of whom are part of marginalized communities—it was taken as a lighthearted comment. I audibly giggled. However, when someone has a fear of their power being challenged, or worse yet diminished or stripped, these same images become concerning and are no laughing matter in their eyes. And there is no question his activities and online responses are being monitored. Tenoch appeared at Festival Prieto on May 25th. MER shat her half-baked Tweet on June 9th. More than enough time to coordinate a new phase of the attack.

I know we are a generation that prides itself on being well-informed and media savvy. You can’t hoodwink and bamboozle us like our unfortunate predecessors who didn’t have a world of information at their fingertips in the form of smartphones, tablets, and wearables. No siree! However, bullshit wrapped in slick packaging, designed to look like what we perceive as credible information, is still just bullshit. We have ALL been duped at some point. It is exhausting at times to dig deeper and to NOT stifle our curiosity. But we have got to stop acting like asking questions when you don’t fully understand something is a character flaw. Or that remaining neutral when a SA accusation has been revealed BY CHOICE in a PUBLIC FORUM somehow demonstrates you are a heartless bastard/bitch who denies assaults ever happen at all. Sorry, but I’m not casting aside my critical thinking skills just so Tumblrland, Instaville, and the Twitterverse might recognize me as a caring human being for the millisecond that my post/reel/Tweet is retained by the reader.

@cutelatinagirl @cantstayawaycani @observers-journal @sarahivi @luzsp9-1981 @aolechan @oakzap425 @love-too-believe @soledadmiranda @venting402 @v4mpires0ap

#tenoch huerta #tenoch huerta mejia #jose tenoch huerta mejia

63 notes · View notes

jemmo · 7 months

Text

actually, the more of sit with it, i do have things to say about only friends

the more and more i see people talking about how much they love boston and how unfair they think his ending was, the more i think it’s actually a very interesting and, for me at least, a good and interesting way to tell a story, even if the writers really didn’t intend it. i think it’s interesting in such a morally grey show to have the show end with this condemnation of the most technically morally wrong person, to have it ultimately ‘conform’ to what is thought of as the correct morality. bc i think it’s interesting that we all can overwhelming agree that we don’t agree with it, bc i think it says a lot about how people who are willing and open-minded and able to look at things both objectively and with humanity and kindness can agree that what other people who just look at acts and behaviours isolated from everything else and subscribe to normalised values wanted and got from this ending is not what we wanted or think is right. bc i think it’s very interesting who we and the characters in the show are quick to forgive and who we aren’t. take Boston and top. they say mew forgave top bc top put in all this work and effort to make it right and earn forgiveness, but in that what he actually did was fight for that image of normality back. he is the rescued promiscuous bad boy who was fixed by settling down and finding happiness, and we can agree and think that’s right bc just generally thats the expected aim and he did it. boston on the other hand wasn’t ‘fixed’. he didn’t settle down, he didn’t become monogamous, he didn’t change, and so we punish him. but did he really not change?? if you recall, top had that emotional scene last week when he told mew he’d suffered enough, but when i saw boston in this ep at their gathering, so quiet and reserved and down, i thought back to early boston and all his confidence and bravado and self-assurance. now tell me this guy has not changed. but we just don’t see it, nor do we value it, bc in fact it’s not a good change. this guy is still suffering, he has been for a while, and while we are so quick to forgive top or ray’s actions through this show bc of their trauma that’s shown to us, do we ever once think that while not trauma, boston might have his reasons, things that have happened to him, the ways he feels, that make him act like this?? and if they were explained by some single trauma, would we more easily forgive him?? i can’t stop thinking about this, about his secret room, his secret passions, his secret identity, all these things he’s made to hide bc of who his family is. and then i think of this tendency for him to try and hold onto people while being messy and promiscuous, hiding the way he truly is, the way he truly wants to love bc he’s afraid that the people he cares for don’t love the same way he does and can’t handle it. which is fine, not everyone can, but it’s precisely bc not everyone can and those people that can are harder to find that he feels the need to keep stringing people along with what’s expected of a relationship while still giving in to the other side of him that doesn’t want monogamy. and when i think about that, i can see why he treated nick the way he did, keeping him hooked with the promise of promises that he could never keep bc it’s not who he is, and while it’s still shit for nick to be treated that way, boston can still only keep hanging the promise of more in front of him so that he can keep him around whilst also reducing his guilt where he can by not making any grand promises.

in the end, the show rewarded those who chose their partners and only them, who settled into monogamous relationships full of love, and bc of those endings, all those precious wrongs get to be erased, they get to start fresh, to begin again. but bc of who boston is, he is left to always feel like he is in the wrong. he’s always been gay, and that’s something he’s never been able to fully show or own bc of his family, and something deep inside of him has been made to feel that both that and not wanting monogamy are wrong, so please story, tell me, how else is he supposed to act?? how else is he supposed to end?? why do we just leave him to feel continually condemned for not being the norm?? and what really got to me was when nick said i think you’d be better off alone, or something to that effect. bc i think it’s wholly not true, and while i get what he meant coming from him, someone that’s always wanted complete monogamy from him and ultimately has to face that he’ll never get it and move on from his feelings, i don’t think it’s true. we’ve seen boston alone. it’s where he is now. and he is not happy. that’s the thing, he’s not meant to be alone, he’s meant to be understood. he’s meant to be treated with the same humanity and kindness that we’ve treated all these other people that have done bad things. just bc he can’t own who he is in the correct way, bc he’s never been allowed to, that doesn’t mean we should just give up and resign him to this life. why is there no one there around him willing to fight for him?? to find out who he truly is where he can’t, and tell him that that’s ok, and that he can do it, he doesn’t have to do it by these means that hurt people, that he can be who he is and cause no harm, bc everyone can be on the same page and choose to be up for it or not. and why is no one around him willing to be that voice of reassurance that says no matter how bad or messy your romantic or sexual relationships are, i will still be here as your friend, bc i value and understand you. bc maybe that’s the presence he really needs in order to explore his romantic and sexual wants in a more open and healthy way. and maybe his actions in this show perfectly are perfectly explained by him himself. he says it to mew, I didn’t do it to hurt you, i just didn’t care. he has never been that purposefully malicious, his actions are just like that bc he’s never learnt to deal with how he’s feeling in a better way. he’s lived his life not caring, detached from relationships bc it’s too hard to find one that works in the way that works for him, and detached from his friends bc they never understood him either, and so he was never able to fully care about them bc they didn’t truly care about him either. they wrote him off from ep 1 the way everyone else did, the ‘hunter’, the whore, the playboy. and we saw him making some progress with nick bc nick did love him, but ultimately bc he didn’t reciprocate nick’s feelings in the way nick wanted him to, he was left alone again. we see it with him just as we saw it with atom, this repeated story of people falling in love with him and when they can’t have all of him, they don’t want any of him. and the way he’s compartmentalised his self worth from these experiences is sex. he can’t offer people complete monogamy so he offers sex, he derives his sense of self from it. bc that’s the thing he is fine with sharing, that he wants to share. he can’t offer romance bc whoever he gives it to, as we see with nick, will ultimately leave him when they can’t get everything else.

so just ask yourself this, if someone understood and loved boston bc that’s the way they were too, or were truthfully ok with him sleeping with other people, and he loved them back, do you think he’d act the same? and do you think we’d see him the same? would we still think his behaviour is bad? would we persecute him the same? or would we celebrate them the same way we celebrate topmew and sandray? the thing is the show won’t give him that bc the show is rewarding monogamy, but it’s worth thinking about if you are one of the people that think boston got the ending he deserved. why do we forgive and explain away the bad behaviour of the other couples bc we can write it off as ‘they did it bc they love each other’, but we can’t do it for boston when the explanation is ‘he did it bc he can’t love himself’. and it’s all rather ironic that we can celebrate nick coming to find self-worth and self-love through boston, but we don’t grieve the fact that boston couldn’t do the same for himself. when of everyone, he’s the one that is, and should, and deserves to begin again, go to a place that doesn’t know his behaviour only through its infamy as dangerous and uncaring, but will evaluate it of their own accord. maybe then, he’ll find the right people he needs in his life, and he can be on his way to feeling like he can treat himself a little more kindly.

#god if you’d told me when this show started that I’d be writing such a sappy emotional defence of Boston I wouldn’t believe you #i just think he’s such a neat and interesting and important character to have in this space #bc even if the show didn’t tell us explicitly #we as viewers can see that this character deserves more than what he was given #and it can drive us to open up to how other people want to live instead of persecuting it #and I’m glad to know there are people out there that see it too it makes me have a little more faith in humanity #anyway boston is just great I’m so glad he exists and I’m so glad we all came to care for him #only friends

33 notes · View notes