#IM DROWNING IN EXAM STRESS | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bgomtori · 7 months

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☆ consume - c.bg

synopsis - you have a major exam coming up, after realising that you've been neglecting your health, beomgyu decides to step in.

-> beomgyu x reader

-> established relationship, high school au!

-> warnings! yn kinda starves herself and beats herself up for not remembering anything :( , pressure from studies, mental breakdowns and burnouts. yn is kind off a studies>you typa girl.

-> note! im having a big exam coming up soon, 'm extremely anxious.. so i kinda wanna write this to relieve somw stress :)

pressure, high standards, academic validation, from your parents, teachers and even yourself were taking a toll on you. staying coped up in your room for weeks, drowning yourself in revision notes, study guides, and past year papers. one may think that you were insane for being able to sit by your desk for such long hours, you thought the same too, but anything for your parents to tell you that they were proud of your achievements, anything to make yourself satisfied with yourself.

hours of cramming notes, and self study was definitely not easy. you'd often find yourself placing your phone under your pillow, preventing yourself from getting distracted by any notification from your friends or boyfriend. it wasn't any better, you'd often skip meals, your parents were usually out till late into the night, making it easier for you since no one forced you out of the room to eat. of course you'd take showers, make yourself refreshed before continuing your long study sessions, snacking on a few energy bars and drinks to pull all nighters to finish a chapter or subject. it was definitely not healthy, but this was like a routine for you when the year end exams were nearing.

you wouldn't be surprised if you arrived at school to see a panicked beomgyu standing by your lockers, glancing at his phone every now and then, wondering why you haven't replied to his calls or texts, he had a brief idea why, but he needed confirmation. you greeted him as per usual, your signature bright smile appearing on your lips, yet why does your eyes still look so tired? beomgyu's face was perplexed, were you staying up again.

"why haven't you replied my messages or calls yn?" beomgyu raised his eyebrows, you looked at him in confusion, switching on your phone to see 38 messages and 7 missed calls from beomgyu. you chuckled, wiping your sweaty palms against your shirt.

"i kinda turned off my phone, and placed it under my pillow so i wouldn't get distracted.. sorry." you apologised, feeling guilty, all beomgyu did was want to care for you, yet you're placing your studies over him. beomgyu sighed, combing his hair through his slender fingers, "i'm just worried for you yn.." his pout made you giggle, your hand patting beomgyu's squishy cheeks in reassurance, "i'll be alright."

"oh right, i'm staying back after school, one on one session with my teacher so you don't need to wait for me 'kay?" you informed, interlocking your arm to beomgyu's as you walked down the crowded hallway. beomgyu hummed in response to you, giving you a chaste kiss on your lips. "i'll see you in your classroom later." beomgyu bidded you goodbye, leaving you to make your way to your seat. scrolling on your phone, you read the messages your friends sent you, replying to all of them, apologising for worrying them so much.

"yn!" hanni called out, dragging a seat towards your desk, the scratchy sound against the floor tiles made you flinch in disgust. "what is it hanni." you replied, freezing at the sudden physical contact of her hugging you like a koala.

"you're not burning the midnight oil again right." hanni grumbled, removing herself from your shoulders. you shook your head, in hopes that she'd believe you. "lies! i know you all too well yn, this month is where you constantly shove your face in textbooks and study guides!" hanni basically shouted for the whole class to hear. you had to quickly shut her up by cupping your hand around her mouth.

"fine, you got me, but it's not like i'll die.." you whispered out the last part, making her gasp dramatically. you shushed her again, placing your index finger on your lips. "you need to take care of yourself yn, i don't want to see a repeat of last year ever again!" hanni nagged, similar to your mother, folding her arms as well. you felt yourself laugh nervously, you knew that you were slowly crawling back into the dark hole that you always find yourself in whenever the final exam season was soon.

classes went by slowly, you found yourself zoning out, bopping your head due to fatigue, you should have bought an energy drink during lunch earlier. after what seemed like hours, you last class was over, students from your class immediately left once the teacher dismissed them, you stayed put, waiting for everyone to leave while you slowly walked towards your teacher.

"sorry for troubling you ms lee.. but i really want to do well this year." you bowed, taking a seat infront of her. she shook her head, "you're fine yn, i can see that you're putting in the effort, that's what i'm proud of." you felt yourself grow speechless, the few words that you've been wanting to hear from your parents came out of your teacher's mouth instead. you didn't know what to do or say, you gave her a quick smile before you two started your little tutoring session.

"you're doing just fine my dear, you'll do just as well for the upcoming end-of-years." ms lee patted your shoulder, ushering you towards the classroom door. you bowed, bidding her goodbye. a sudden wave of negative thoughts started crashing over you, why? you didn't want to grow attached to a teacher that gave you the care and concern your parents should have given, along with the thoughts of you wanting to do extremely well for ms lee, for yourself, and even your parents even if it did nothing. you just didn't want anyone to be disappointed in you. you plugged in your earphones to cancel out your overpowering thoughts, blasting your shared playlist with beomgyu.

ynn ★: i just ended, going home rn..

ynn ★: wyd?

gyu :> : taking a break from revision, kinda lazy today

gyu :> : it's getting late, go home safely mkay? i love you

ynn ★: i love you too gyu :)

he was so sweet to you, you didn't deserve this especially how you were treating him. you prioritised your studies over him, hence not giving him the same amount of attention. you unlocked your front door, immediately heading into your room to start work. you showered, did your facial routine, and turned on your nightlamp. your table was messy, filled with all, notebooks, textbooks, loose practice papers, and stationary. you groaned, you weren't feeling like it, but you couldn't stop. you knew that you'd regret it.

each word you wrote looked like scribbles, you spelt things wrong. why wasn't anything going your way right now? why is your mind going haywire, was it because of earlier? tears pricked your eyes, you couldn't do this anymore, you felt overwhelmed from everything, mentally exhausted in general. you slapped your face, in hopes that you'd stop crying but it continued, you were breaking down, losing complete control of your feelings. first time after a year, sure you've cried many times this year, and past years, however, this felt like your worst one yet.

you quickly picked up your phone, you wanted beomgyu, you needed him to console you. hitting the call button, your fingers were trembling, soft pleas coming out of your mouth for him to hurry up.

"yn?" his voice called out, it was rare for you to call him so suddenly. you sniffled, bringing your phone's mic towards your lips, "please, come over.. you have my keys, just come please gyu." you stuttered, unable to speak properly due to how dry your throat was. you could hear from beomgyu's end how frantic he was, him grabbing his keys to dashing out of his house. "i'll be there in 3, please wait yn." you hummed, ending the call. you replied beomgyu's messages, his attempt to keep you distracted, but your thoughts were too overpowering, you continued sobbing, your fingers digging into your thighs, scratching them from time to time.

"yn." beomgyu whispered, closing your bedroom door, locking it just in case your parents suddenly came home, and saw you in this state. you hiccuped, turning towards him, beomgyu looked at you with concern, this was the first time he has seen you like this after a long time. he gave you his hoodie that he knew gave you comfort, before pulling you into a tight embrace. you continued crying on his shoulder, probably making a wet mess on his shirt right now, but beomgyu didn't care. beomgyu's fingers rubbed the back of your head, whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

"you're okay now yn, it's alright. let it all out." beomgyu mumbled, his soothing, calming voice, making you feel less like shit. you felt yourself slowly easing up, pulling away from beomgyu's comfortable shoulder. beomgyu took a piece of tissue from the box at the corner of your desk, blowing your nose for you, his thumb wiping away the single tear falling from your face.

"let's lay in bed, i'll make you some instant ramen alright?" beomgyu rubbed your cheek, before aidding you towards your bed, he made sure that you were comfortable before he went to your kitchen to prepare some samyang, your favourite. you laid there on your bed, scrolling on your phone, still suffering with a stuffed nose, but you could smell beomgyu's scent on the hoodie he gave you, consoling your thoughts.

the aroma of the spicy carbonara samyang filled your nostrils, making you sit up. you grabbed the bowl beomgyu passed to you, slurping it up to your heart's content. "nice?" beomgyu asked, sitting on the edge of your bed, his head propped his head onto the palm of his hand, watching you with gentle eyes. you nodded your head, chewing on the cheesy noodles. you twirled the noodles around the chopsticks, tilting them towards beomgyu, wanting him to eat them. beomgyu took a big bite, savouring the creamy, spicy sensation of the noodles.

"i think i should be a chef." beomgyu joked, trying to make you feel better. you giggled, placing the empty bowl on the nightstand next to your bed. you signalled beomgyu to lay next to you, wanting to cuddle with him in bed. beomgyu obliged, allowing you to nuzzle into the crook of his neck, the vibration of his humming, made you feel relaxed. your body was practically on top of beomgyu, while you cling onto him like your life depended on it. you looked up to stare at beomgyu, through your fluttering eyelashes, giving his jaw a chaste kiss.

"hm?" beomgyu hummed, using his free hand to stroke your soft hair, you pouted slightly, still snifflinf a little from your breakdown. your fingers laced around his as he used his thumb to rub your knuckles gently, assuring your that everything is in control now.

"i love you beom." you muttered, loud enough for him to hear, "i'm sorry for suddenly worrying you, i don't know, my first instinct was to call you." you rambled, apologising for being such a burden to him, you felt tears slowly welling up in your eyes again. you said whatever concerned was distracting you, letting out a few tears.

"it's just so tiring to try to make everyone around me proud of me when no one even cares, not even my parents. at this point i'm doing it for myself, for my own validation, but i can't see any improvement, or just something that i can take pride in." you choked out, full on ranting to beomgyu while he stayed quiet, rubbing your hand in small circular motions. his eyes stayed on your figure, making sure that you know he's listening to you with all ears.

"i'm sorry if i'm ever a bad girlfriend to you, you give me so much attention, love, and care, but i can't seem to reciprocrate it, i love you so much, but i don't know how to prove that to you.. i'm afraid that'll you'll leave me for someone better, someone that'll shower you with affection." you apologised, reasoning yourself. beomgyu's eyebrows were knitted together, how could you say that? you were the best thing that happened in his life.

"yn, you know i don't care if you don't provide me the same amount of adoration or anything, as long as i know that you're okay, and that you're still here to stay by my side. then that's all i ask for. i'm honest." beomgyu carressed your cheek, while your lips trembled, your eyes glossy, blinking back the tears threathening to fall out. beomgyu's plump lips curled up, pecking your lips.

"just don't overwork yourself, i hate seeing you like this, you make me worried." beomgyu warned, you slightly chuckled, "i'll try to improve myself for you gyu." reassuring him.

#txt beomgyu #txt scenarios #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu scenarios #beomgyu x reader #beomgyu #txt imagines #txt fanfic #beomgyu soft hours #beomgyu imagines #txt imagine #txt reactions #txt

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myillusions · 8 months

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Noisy Sunday (Joel Miller x f!reader)

Summary: You've entered a mindset you're unsure how to come back from, your own emotions drowning you in a pool of despondency. Joel is there, trying to help you pull away from it.

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: HEAVYYY angst, fluff, cursing, large descriptions of depression, anxiety, dark thoughts, undefined age gap (reader is of age), kind of dark themes its very somber

A/N: hi hi!! oh my, im so sorry i havent posted in so long. life has been so busy lately with exams and work, but here's this whilst i struggle with that and writers block! sorry (not rlly) that its so angsty, THANK YOU SO MUCH to anyone who reads, i hope u enjoy lovelies! also please please PLEASE i cannot stress this enough; if any of the warnings i've stated make you uncomfortable, please DO NOT read this!! and for anyone who may need to talk, my messages are always open <33

It’s peculiar, you think. How it eats away at you, gnawing down against supple flesh when you’ve already been forcefully spiralled onto the floor. Most say it’s like greeting an old friend; and you agree. It’s almost like reuniting with a family member whom you rarely see at a gathering. The one which then continue to pester you with inquiries you don’t have the vigour to answer.

It comes in a moment. Sometimes for no reason at all. It reminds you of the subject which stops your musical theatre production mid-way, shining a glaring light towards you whilst you stare wide-eyed back; a deer caught in the headlights. Your character starts to break down around you whilst you’re stood onstage, its pieces cascading along your incapacitated physique like thrashing water which you’ve just dived into from a twenty-foot jump, limbs flailing by your head until the inevitable crash through the translucent liquid stings at your skin.

It attaches itself like a shadow to you, not always so visible yet constantly looming from around your shoulder. It never really made sense to you, how the more the light shines against this tenebrosity, the darker the shadow it casts. Shading you. Smothering you. A copiously adamant fire which refuses to be extinguished, its embers dancing up past the hillocks perched in the distance and threatening to singe anyone who comes near.

It made you yearn for a reposeful night, where the stars shimmered like pools of water in reflection to the sea rather than your own tears surging down your cheeks. Where a modest zephyr tapped gently at your swaying hair, twirling locks around its invisible finger gingerly. Where the whole world paused on its axis, bringing forth those few moments of pure solace. Nothing to bother you, and nothing for you to bother.

“How long has it been since you’ve slept?” A husky voice drawls out from beside you after the door to the front patio squeals open on its hinges, revealing Joel; adorned in his sleepwear of blue plaid print trousers and a black long-sleeved sweater. Considering his normal attire of worn-down jeans and a permanent scowl, he looked almost ridiculous, but in an admiring sort of way. His inquiry forcefully dragged you from the dazed state you had found yourself caught in, your eyes hauling themselves to face him laboriously slow, like it was strenuous to do so. You blinked a multitude of times to attempt to clear your head of its cloudiness.

You gave a harsh swallow before you even attempted to reply, “Not long. I just needed some water and air.” You lied right through your teeth, wincing towards the factor that a glass of water was sitting idly beside you on a tall and round wooden coffee table, still full to the brim with the reflecting liquid. Joel didn’t look convinced. To be honest, you had maybe caught a total of eight hours of sleep in the past three or four days, if lucky. Your body drums with craving for rest at the deprivation, but you couldn’t bring yourself to relax for long enough to lull into even a light rest, thoughts striking their way through forcefully in the canvas of your head, ripping downwards to leave their mark fiercely, consistently reminding you that pain is not an easy thing to ignore.

If you could say the apocalypse surfacing has brought you anything, it’s that it’s made you tired. So tired. But there are two types of tired, you suppose; one is a dire need of sleep, the other is a woeful need for peace.

Joel exhales past his nose harshly, his head dipping downwards for a moment, maybe in disappointment- you’re not sure. Either way, your stomach lurches with guilt, and you turn your head to face forward once again and pay rigorous attention to each detail lining the Jackson street in front of your given accommodation. The street was entirely empty, the only sound to be heard within earshot being the light whisk of the breeze against your supple skin, reddening the tip of your nose and turning your fingertips numb. You should’ve guessed Joel wouldn’t believe your white lie. Knowing him, he likely noticed you retracting the sheets from your legs and his arms strewn around your waist at just the start of the night, before tiptoeing down the stairs as quietly as possible to weave through the kitchen then to the front patio, where you have been set for a couple of hours now.

You’re both silent for multiple pregnant pauses, and you have to fight the urge to nibble nervously against your bottom lip, apprehension swirling within your chest.

“Do you want to come back to bed?” Joel tries cautiously, to which you visibly tense. You tilt your chin downwards dubiously, before giving an almost indistinguishable shake of your head from side-to-side.

Joel doesn’t give a response to your discreet answer, but instead pushes himself forwards from where he’s leaned against the doorframe to move past you and settle against the uncomfortable wooden chair opposite your own. The chair creaks as he perches himself there, the only intruding sound to the tranquillity before it swallows you both whole once again, thudding against the thin air which is gradually turning palpable. It’s suffocating.

“…Would you-“ He starts, his gaze turning upwards from the patios surface to face you, “Want to talk about it?”

Your heart throbs agonisingly at his offer, your fingertips tracing the wrecked linen material of your pants. You try a small, consoling smile, one that barely reaches your eyes; your head lifting to face him.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” You murmur back, sombrely. You weren’t fibbing about this, though. There was no explanation as to why you were feeling this surge of perplexing emotions. It appeared as if it were just a protruding root sticking awkwardly out from the soiled terrain, its only task to trip and surprise anyone who were unfortunate to tread along. Even if you wanted to talk with Joel about it, you weren’t sure how to put it into words. It’s fine, until it’s not; a surprise.

“I can’t help you if you won’t let me.” Joel speaks, his voice softer than usual, as though he was afraid for what your reaction would be.

You bottom lip purses as you bite down against your tongue roughly, almost drawing blood to quarrel against the melancholy rising in your throat. You’re not sure how to reply- you don’t wish to reply. You would rather descend into the quietude than face this situation. It’s not that you liked the silence, no- you actually despised it. Silence gave any thoughts swirling around the midst of your head permission to inflate and rise to the surface, bobbing up and down there, whilst its limbs helplessly thrash around, wishing to get back to shore.

It's only after you notice that Joel is still peering over at you expectantly do you swallow gratingly, opening your mouth to answer.

“Well, I- It’s not anything, I’m fine-“

“Why can’t you just stop for once in your life?”

“What?” You ask, your voice cracking at its edges. Your brows shoot upwards at his words, taken aback.

“You lie to me, act like you’re okay- when you’re so clearly not and you won’t even let yourself realise that you need help.” He speaks sternly, eyes firmly trained on you- whilst you can’t even meet his gaze, eyesight shifting to anywhere but where he’s sat opposite you.

You weigh over your words, a trepidatious lump forming inside your throat. Your vision blurs at its corners, your brain fogging over with despondency.

“Please don’t make me say it.” You eventually speak again, your voice strained painfully, as your head drops down in a swaying motion, defeated.

Joel doesn’t reply, but instead reaches forward, gently placing his hand atop your own where its set against your thigh. He gives a gentle squeeze, urging you to blink back up towards him, where he’s peering at you with a softened gaze; and you can’t fight off the tears that instantaneously build up against your vision, attempting to rip past your shields and barriers which are gradually toppling down around you.

“I am barely holding on.” You admit, your shoulders slumping forward with the heaved effort of speaking without letting a cry rip through in interruption, causing a few teardrops to plunge down the canvas of your cheeks. A harrowing headache thrums against your forehead, your field of view only worsening, but not enough that you can’t see the way that Joel’s expression is overcome with visible empathy, which only results in making your stomach lurch more.

“And I-“ You exhale sharply, “And I can’t even tell you why. I just- there’s this thing, and it’s weighing over my shoulders. I can’t shake it.”

“You don’t have to find the perfect words. Just tell me what you’re feeling. I’m here.” He encourages softly.

“It’s like- like I’m here, but I’m not. I’m away from my body, watching over myself; whilst continuously being dragged backwards by this unknown force- pushing me somewhere I think I know. It’s like déjà vu, when you walk into a room, and you don’t where you know or remember it from, but you can feel that you recognise it. I-I’m angry, I’m sad and I’m confused. Maybe I just have a built-up resentment against the world.” You speak rather sullenly, but try to mask it with a small, tight-lipped smile towards Joel once your brief monologue comes to an end.

“I can’t say I know exactly what you’re feeling. But… I don’t want you to push me away. I want to try and help you, in any way that I can. But I can’t if you won’t allow me to. And… I don’t want it to seem like I’m tryin’ to coddle you, or anythin’. It’s because- y’know, I care about you.” Joel speaks steadily, his gaze shimmering with uncertainty.

Your heart lurches downwards in repentance with his words, as though you were liable for your own shifting thoughts and feelings. It bruises you; how much you’ve allowed your emotions to take hold, guiding the wheel in a swerve as rubber burns against asphalt distastefully. How far you’ve come, just to end up here. You know you need help. You’re just unsure how to accept any. But you know that you wish to breathe again. To hold out a hand to loved ones. To be afraid of death again. To have excitement at the idea of different winding roads. To feel free as a light breeze washes against your skin, clearing any distress from you in a wave. You wish to dream again. This longing is what powers your words onwards, as you peer over at Joel, vulnerable,

“I need help.”

Joel’s hand raises from the back of your palm, and instead encompasses your icy fingers with his warmer ones, intertwining them. He searches your eyes for a moment, and once he discovers a bold outline of authenticity, he promptly nods towards you.

“Together?”

“Together.” You reply.

It evokes a memory of a familiar oak tree. One you were very accustomed to when you were younger, before the outbreak. As a child, you used to wonder down the street to the park perched at the end after every school day. Outlining the grounds, just opposite a wooden bench, was an oak tree. Tall and mighty; confidence resonating from its stance, daring anyone to meddle with it. Thick arms branching from its moss-coated wood, whilst the lime-coloured leaves bundled against each other cascaded the surrounding distance in shade. You would lay beneath it, basking in the frigid yet reassuring atmosphere it created, hair messily sprawled out around your head. You would frequently come to the spot to just rest within the constant spiralling of the world, watching as the tree’s features changed with the reoccurring seasons; its leaves shifting from green to gold, from gold to ginger, then from ginger to cherry, and then falling, oscillating down to the soil with the wind, before repeating its cycle. It was almost soothing, watching its colours shift around with the change of the earth, whilst resolutely remaining staunch in its attitude, its branches a prime symbol of vigour. Changing, but still remaining what it is; strong. You deeply envied that, and hoped- wished, that someday you would build yourself up to resemble that oak tree.

"We drink the poison our minds pour for us and wonder why we feel so sick." - Atticus

Noisy Sunday - Patrick Watson

Comments and feedback are appreciated!

#joel miller fanfiction #Joel Miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel #hbo the last of us #the last of us #help idk what im doing #pedro pascal #tlou #tlou series #hbo #joel miller x f!reader

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ma3mae · 1 year

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Hi, can I request? I'm actually doing an exam and yeah it almost finished but I didn't finished 100%. Can you do a scenario where the reader is overthinking about the exam that she submitted. When I didn't finished I was like overthinking that I'm useless, failed, worthless, etc. ( i did that because I thought I can upgrade this semester but turns out I'm failed.) Thankyou so much of you can write this thing for me! (Also can I get a cuddle from Chuuya 🥺🥺🥺)

"Exams are a hassle"

Summary: Exams have been stressing you out for weeks now so how does your boyfriend comfort you? (Chuuya x Reader)

Genre: plenty of fluff but also a bit depressing ^ anon request tells u why

Warnings: a bit of self loathing and sleep deprivation bc exams are the best booster for self confidence I FEEL U ANON

A/N: thank you for your request!! I hope this will somehow be able to lift you up 😩✋ you can do it, anon!! Soon you'll be done and then u can relax and enter bsd brainrot again. Also didnt proofread this bc im writing this in a car so the nausea is lowkey kicking in 😩😩 hope this doesnt seem rushed omggg

Part 2 : In sickness and health

Nakahara Chuuya

our cheeto boy finally coming home after a normal day work

Like comepletely annihilating a mini terrorist organisation LMAO 🤡

he comes home to find yourself on the same spot and legit same position on the couch he has last seen you like FKING 12 HOURS AGO???

is instantly baffled and worried because??

"Are you seriously STILL preparing for your exam?? Don't you need a break??"

he immediately shuts himself up tho as he just sees the dark bags under your eyes and the red eyes and oh no :((

a sniffle follows as you bury ur face into your hands and this BOY IS JUMPING across the room to get to you

Jk but hes instantly by your side and cradling you in his arms

h-his light? the love of his life??? HATING HERSELF???? BC OF AN EXAM?????

u know what that means 🚓🚓🚓🚓🚓🚓

Jk no jail

Hes gonna come at you WITH FACTS THO 😤✋

********

Exhaustion was weighting onto you like nothing else. Your eyes were hurting at this point from having to look at the same screen for weeks now, only taking breaks to go to the toilet or either drown yourself in energy drink or coffee.

Your boyfriend would often be absent because of his work and he'd support you as always. You saw the worry in his eyes and he would ask if you'd like his help or if there's anything he could do for you.

But you kept refusing him since he had already enough on his shoulders in your eyes. He was probably even more tired than you yet still managed to shine so brightly whenever he'd look at you with so much adoration in his eyes for you, no matter how horrible his day went.

Slowly but surely felt something bubbling up inside you.

"No... I can't deal with this right now." you tried to convince yourself as you swallowed the lump inside your throat.

You looked at the time on the screen of your PC, trying to see through the blur infront of your eyes.

3:47am

Fuck, you were tired. You just wanted to quit everything, cry yourself to sleep and finally be at peace but no. This shitty exam just had to be one of the most important events in your life and you really couldn't fuck this one up.

As you buried your face in your hands, you could faintly hear keys rustling outside the door.

No! I can't let him see me like this!

Yet your tears just wouldn't stop and soon enough you heard him enter.

"Hey, doll. What the hell, you're still awake? I told you to just go to sl-!"

You didn't want to answer him. No, you simply couldn't even if you wanted to.

Only mere seconds passed before you felt gloved hands grasp both of your hands.

"Sweetheart... Listen to me."

You merely shook your head as he watched your shoulders tremble.

Clicking his tounge, he lifted you up with ease, pulling a sudden yelp out of you.

"No, Chuuya. Please put me back, I have to g-"

"Y/N, just listen to me for one damn time."

How could you refuse him? When you could feel his warmth so close to you.

Yet your guilt was frankly consuming your whole being. You could hear it in his voice.

Was he angry? Annoyed?

Because of you?

You just wanted to get through this exam by yourself. How could you burden him when he had already enough on his own plate. He didn't need someome like you just adding more onto it.

"I'm sorry, Chuu..."

You felt him sit down onto the couch, the soft light of the screen illuminating the space.

"For what?" He whispered to you as he began to rub circles onto your back.

"It's just..."

A sigh escaped as you felt his hands grasp yours, finally letting him see you fully for the first time and yet the sight made your heart clench.

"No, none of that shit anymore, alright? If you want to rant about it then rant. If you want to cry about it then cry. But no way in hell can you expect me to sit back any longer. It already went on for long enough these past few weeks. You need a break, Y/N. "

There he was.

The love of your life, wearing his heart on his sleeve for you as he poured it out.

Always being honest with you and laying himself bare.

Its what made you fall in love with him but you couldn't deny that you envied that part of him too.

Yet he always managed to make it a part of you too with words alone.

"But I can't. I'm afraid, Chuuya. Afraid that I'll fail this. Because then what? I don't know what I'm supposed to do if the worst would happen. I just-!"

You couldn't see anything anymore. Eyes so blurry as you tried your best to look at him.

And he still managed to leave you breathless as he wiped your tears away, feeling as if you'd be looking at the sunrise itself.

Always giving the energy to let you see the next day.

"I just don't want to burden you. Anyone. Even myself. But what am I supposed to do? I feel so useless everytime I memorize something and I just keep forgetting it because I just don't want to fail. What should I just d-"

Soft lips met yours, a slight tinge of the cherry chapstick you had gifted him on your taste buds.

"You are not a burden, Y/N. Not to anyone, you or even me. I meant if for every time when I asked if I could help. Yet you would always tell me you'd want to do this yourself and if my girlfriend wants to do that then why shouldn't I let her? But everyone has their limit and you need to understand that. I know you've been crying yourself to sleep these past few weeks and I hated myself for letting something like this happen. "

He let his lips linger on your right cheek.

"It's okay to be afraid."

Linger on your left.

"It's okay to cry.

Linger on your forehead.

"But the last thing I'd let you do..."

And lastly return back to your lips.

"Is you feeling like a burden. Feeling useless and everything that comes with it because you are none of that."

You gently took his face into your hands, letting your shaken eyes gaze into his firm ones.

"But what if I fail?"

"You won't. I know you can do it. I've seen how you are, Y/N. Hell you're one of the strongest people I know. You'll stand up for what's right. Every time I come battered, bruised and everything else, you'd always be there to comfort me, tend to my wounds, even feed me when you have to. Your presence alone would make the weight vanish on my shoulders, yet you always carry it without any complaints. So let me do the same to you and help you. "

You tightly wrapped your arms around him, burying your face into his shoulder.

"But it's just an ex-"

"You better not fucking tell me that its JUST an exam. I'm not listening to any of that for tonight."

You felt his lips stretch into a smile as he buried his face into the crook of neck.

"Let's just go to bed and I'll help you rehearse everything, okay?"

"Are you sure about that? Is your patience gonna hold out long enough?"

You let out an "acK!" as he suddenly tightened his arms around you.

"Don't underestimate me, doll. You've seen what I can do so rehearsing for a puny exam won't be a challenge at all. So let's-!"

He lifted the both of you up with his ability, floating towards your bedroom.

"-just sleep already because we both deserve it after tonight, alright?"

You couldn't help but chuckle at his sudden silliness.

"Oi, what are you laughing at"

"No, nothing. Just appreciating my boyfriend, his handy power and the love he'd always give me."

"D-Don't be so sappy. Rest and save that energy for tomorrow."

"Hmm, oh well. But I still wanna say that I love you though."

"Out of nowhere... but I love you too. Always will."

*****

Anyway yall rehearse that shit together and ur boy being the one to take breaks bc bro wtf have u been learning???? This some science level shit?? But he gives u snacks, cuddles, support and everything you need

bro's gonna pamper you as soon as you finally had ur exam and you gotta restrain him from showering you with gifts bc of how happy he is

HIS future wife deserves the best after all 😤😤😤✋✋✋✋

if u tell him that he doesnt need to buy you so much and that you'd be happy with him just being there then oh...

dont expect him to hold back after being so cute 🤡 especially after yall havent done anything for weeks probably so time to catch up 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

#bsd x reader #chuuya x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #nakahara chuuya

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tidekissed · 2 months

Text

im not doing my proper format because it's 2:30 am and im posting this before my brain tells me not. to. i will put my taglist on her e though.

ok. enjoy. or don't. thank you for reading and supporting my silly little works regardless. GOoonfight. work under cut

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He seemed to have a sixth sense for knowing when she was overworking. He woke up every time, without fail.

“Bloody hell, you’re still up?”

The sleepy grumble did nothing to perturb the woman tapping away at her computer, her noise cancelling headphones blocking out Simon’s gravelly exclamation.

“Oi! I’m talking to you!”

Still nothing. In his groggy stupor, Simon decided that throwing a nearby plush at her head—a large orb of a Jigglypuff—was a good idea. It collided with her noggin perfectly, startling a yelp out of Zale as she almost fell out of her chair. Frantically turning off her headphones, she whirled on him with quite the stink eye. “What’s with you, Simon?”

“I could ask the same thing of you, pet. It’s two in the bloody morning. Come to bed.”

Her heart rate jumped at the affection that bled through his annoyance, but she hid it well. “I’m busy. Deadlines. Plenty of things to be doing.”

“Balderdash. You’re not so busy that you can’t get proper sleep. I would know—I took on that co-council assignment Edgeworth-dono tried to pass to you so you wouldn’t stress. Now, in you get.”

He lifted the covers, giving her quite the view of his thick and muscular thighs as he patted the space next to him. “While I appreciate the admission of doing something incredibly nice for me that you definitely wouldn’t have told me not sleep drunk, I didn’t do well on these last exams I had and need to—“

With a cross between a sigh and a growl, Simon stood from his comfortable position and scooped her out of her chair by force, shutting the computer lid and plunging the room into peaceful darkness. “Bed. Now. You can revise tomorrow while better rested.”

Ever the gentleman—even when he pretended not to be—he retrieved the plush that had been his ammunition and returned it to its place on the side of the bed, slinging Zale over his shoulder with only one arm to allow himself to do so. The amount of willpower she had to not grab his ass was astounding.

Her roommate settled her gently under the covers, climbing into bed himself and trapping her with his arm. “That’s better. Goodnight.”

Zale anxiously fidgeted, the proximity to the man she had such strong but doubtless unrequited feelings for making her more wide awake rather than sleepy. She had been feeling pretty shitty, so she was drowning her woes in work. If she had to just sit and be left alone with her own thoughts…

Simon suddenly surprised her again by pulling her close to his chest, humming in contentment as his nose sank into her hair. “Mmmm…lied. Much better th’way. G’night.”

Despite all of her worries about her academics, her work, her worth, and her interpersonal relationships, she melted like butter on a roll into him. No matter what he felt for her, he definitely cared for her a great deal. Even she could tell that much. And, in the moment, when she was just tired and her cheeks were salty and tight from her earlier crying, she didn’t need to stress over what they were or what they might become. She could just enjoy his comfort.

And this, Simon thought with a smile as he felt the tension leave the woman in his arms and her breathing evening out, is why I’m always quick to wake if she’s not come to bed yet.

#deep sea scrolls #🪶

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gl6mp · 3 months

Text

im still sad that people think the euphoric brothers are racist when it's like haha No we just had to close the portuguese chat because it was really seeping into the mod team's personal mental health (mine included) to take 50+ screenshots and filter them through google translate to cherrypick what is honest criticism and who joined to talk shit and eventually it got worse to where reasoning with anyone wasn't working because people kept joining and drowning out our messages

thank god they have portuguese mods in there now but like the recruiting system is funky and it isn't always easy to just get new mods. the chat was closed due to people joining to raid that channel and hopefully it would've been easier to tell who joined to raid if they went to other channels for it (admittedly not the best idea, we were under a lot of stress and it was hard to think of any other quick solutions)

we did what we could. was it the best? Hell no! my misinformed and outdated words got used in core's original callout thread (and he failed to censor my name) where he thought the mods were attacking his viewers for joining the server to give honest criticism.. but like, during that actual convo, i was stressing a Lot about how i was really happy the people in the chat were being understanding and providing honest criticism without harassing anyone.

all of that extra convo was snipped out and the message i sent was taken out of context. my heart dropped when i found out that was the case. i wasn't up to date on the situation and so my words were used against me to fuel the narrative that he was banned from the discord server :-[

i wish they did communicate more when removing the content creator roles but i also understand why they didn't. behind the scenes, they're busy with final exams and balancing game development and irl school and they don't have a lot of free time. that means a lot of dms may go unanswered.

that and also... the main misconception was that this was solely a discord issue because the brothers weren't active on twitter prior to that. and we all thought he was upset because he didn't get a steam key. it was just a big clusterfuck misunderstanding that we tried to control but ultimately we had to give up on that and just let things run wild for a while.

it's just that you can only explain your pov so many times before it gets drowned out again and again and it becomes exhausting. there will be people who care and people who don't. at the end of the day this is just a niche community on the internet but it's important to me so.. :'-/

#euphoric brothers #garten of banban #woof woof #rant

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daddyhausen · 2 years

Note

professor hangman getting annoyed because you're disrupting the lecture and flirting with another guy in front of him so he holds you in after class, bends you over the desk and fucks you right there?

professor hangman will always be a god tier concept 🥵

.*•…………………..•⊹•…………………..•*.

• teacher’s pet — hangman adam page •

.*•…………………..•⊹•…………………..•*.

{ masterlists } | { aew masterlist } | { hangman adam page masterlist }

.*•…………………..•⊹•…………………..•*.

{ warnings } — 18 + { minors do not interact }, fem!reader, college student x professor, power imbalance, submissive/dominant dynamic, restraints { belt }, male + female orgasms, public sex, teasing, exhibitionism, jealous sex, rough sex, spanking, penetrative sex, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, squirting, creampie

{ word count } — 1.7k

{ genre } — smut

.*•…………………..•⊹•…………………..•*.

{ taglist } — @boutmachines @thewrestlingbitch @omg-im-such-a-masochist @thebestintheworld @chrisdickinson @cuzimacomedian @wardlow @sammiejane22

{ comment if you want to be added to the taglist }

.*•…………………..•⊹•…………………..•*.

the class seemed to be going well, at least from his perspective. his students paying attention to his lectures for once, attentively taking notes as exam season slowly rolled around the corner. it was a season he dreaded for more reasons that once, firstly, his students were more stressed than usual, and rightfully so, their entire futures depended on said exams, as for him, he could not escape the endless flood of paperwork, tests and assignments that needed grading, half the time it felt as if he was drowning in a sea of black and white.

he had his back facing the class, his attention turned to the blackboard, explaining the last few details to the class before it ended, chalk softly underlining the most important parts. amongst the silence, a soft giggle echoed around the lecture theatre. he knew that sound, it was distinctive, the most sickly sweet sound to ever grace his ears, at night it haunts him, prays on his most impure thoughts. he knew he would simply ignore it, but he had made his intentions clear long ago, from the first time he ever heard that sweet sound.

he turned around, a heavy sigh and a look of displeasure graced his pinkish lips, as he waited for the room to silence again. he had noticed you, in the second row, your attention not on him, where it rightfully should be. instead you had your gaze fixed on the young quarterback that sat beside you, his gaze so intently fixated on your breasts, often fluttering up to meet your eyes for a moment before quickly returning. the sight made the cowboy seethe internally, jealousy was indeed his weakness, and he would not simply let some jock toy with his secret love.

he noticed your gaze, your eyes hellbent with some form of emotion the cowboy could not quite put his finger on, still fixated on the quarterback. was it to intentionally make adam jealous? you really had no need to, it was not like any man here opposed a threat to him. adam cleared his throat, the sound obnoxious and exaggerated, your head quickly whipping to meet his gaze.

“is there something funny, miss y/n?” he crossed his arms across his chest, addressing his words to you rather sternly. “would you like to share it with the rest of the class?”

you scoffed silently in your seat, mimicking his actions, crossing your arms over your chest in an attempt to mock him. little did he know that your panties were soaked through due to his mini jealous tirade.

“nothing that hasn’t already been said, professor” you remarked, a mild sultry undertone to your words which made the cowboy chuckle underneath his breath. thank god that the classroom was still occupied, otherwise he would have punished you then and there for such a snarky comment.

“well then, if you want to chat with your…”friends”...please do so after my class” he paused before uttering the word “friends'', hoping that libido filled jock would understand the slightest of what he was dealing with, although adam did not expect him to. he returned to his desk, momentarily glaring in your direction before eventually sitting back down. the bell sounded mere moments later, adam kept his gaze on your a moment, reminding the class about the importance of studying for the exams, information they’d surely forget as soon as they walked out the door. he noticed however, you were taking your time packing away your things, intentionally so it seems, a sly smirk crossing your lips, meeting his gaze momentarily before placing the last book or two into your bag.

“miss y/n would you mind staying back for a moment?” he questioned, keeping up his professional demeanour as the last few students slowly began to pile out of the lecture hall. as the last one left he made a beeline for the door, locking it. a scowl crossing his lips as he stared back at you, already having seated yourself on his desk, innocently batting his eyelashes up at him.

“who gave you the right to pull that little fucking stunt back there, doll?” he questioned trapping your between his knees, his palms either side of your desk, body close to yours, desperate for touch.

“i have no idea what you’re talking about professor” you tried your best to play innocent, keeping the image by tilting your head and still batting your eyelashes up at him. he scoffed, almost as if the entire sentence was a joke on his knowledge.

“don’t play dumb with me, doll” he leaned in closer, his lips barely grazing yours. “it‘s been a week without my cock, hasn’t it? a week without a nice, rough fucking, huh? trying to make me jealous so i’ll give you what you need?”

his fingers came down underneath your skirt to swipe harshly against your panties, putting pressure against your clit through the soaked fabric, you whimpered at the sensation, his fingers began to move the slightest, making you sink back into his desk ever so slightly. you did not offer him a verbal response, far too eager for the pleasure you will soon receive, instead, you tightly wrapped your thighs around his fingers, making your intentions more than clear.

“i’ll give you my cock, darlin’…” he began, prying your panties to the side and gently begging to tease your clit further. “but you gotta be a good girl and not make me jealous anymore, do you understand?

you could only whimper in response, for fear that a loud moan would erupt from your lips if you parted them. you nodded furiously, so desperately needing to be ruined by him. the scowl across his lips soon formed into a sly smirk as he hooked your panties between his fingers, tearing the soaked fabric in two. his lips met yours with hungry and feverish kisses, just as eager to please as you were to receive.

he flipped up your skirt, his large palms smoothing down the skin of your now exposed thighs. he pulled you off his desk for a moment, a small gasp leaving your lips in surprise, he spun you around, your back now pressed against his chest as he pushed your down face first against his desk, prying your skirt back up as it had fallen down to it’s original position, your ass now bare for him.

one hand held your wrists behind your back, the other fumbling with his belt. the soft clatter of leather and metal flooded your ears, the sensation against your wrists was like a recollection of a distant memory, having not experienced it in so long. he bound your wrists behind his back with his belt, the sound of his zipper soon followed, loving the small grunt that parted his pink lips as he freed his cock from the restraint of his jeans.

“you should know better than to tease me in class like that, darling…” his palm came down hard on your ass, the sensation making your toes clench at the sudden impact, a small whimper against the wood of his desk. “what if someone found out about our little “extra lessons”

he put emphasis on the last phrase, much like he did previously. his cock teasing your soaked entrance, just barely pressing the tip to your void.

“i’m sorry sir…i’ll be a good girl…just please fuck me…” you whines muttered against his desk, arms already starting to ache from the tightness of his belt.

“not so confident now are we, doll?” he smirked against your earlobe, gently kissing the skin. “as you wish, darlin’”

he sunk his cock deep inside your warmth. no hesitation on his part, not time given for you to adjust to his size. you wanted him to fuck you, well that’s exactly what you were going to get. he kept a tight grip on your waist, pulling your back against the sharp thrusts of his cock. he was merciless, like a man possessed, unhinged! his cock filling your void completely, and there was maybe an inch or two left to spare.

in his mind he kept replaying the scene that unfolded mere moments ago, shamelessly flirting in front of him, with a man, although adam would barely consider him a man, who was far beneath him. adam kept silent, letting your soft moans echo through the empty lecture hall. the act previously, as much as he would not like to admit it, fueled his jealousy, only made him lust after you more, keep you hidden from the prying eyes of distrustful men who lay claim to you the first moment they saw fit.

he knew you were close, despite your silent pleas for release, your cunt clenched around his size, dripping with want. your moans heightened, increased in their frequency and loudness, so much so that he had to wrap his hand around your mouth to silence you.

“cum around my cock, darlin’” his tone softened slightly upon noticing you were close to orgasm. it was soothing, comforting, he had completely abandoned the professor persona for the time being. your hips bucked back against his cock, matching the speed of his thrusts, their intensity and force. you threw your head back in pleasure, his lips capturing yours, stealing the breath from your lungs with sweet, longing kisses as you spilled around his cock.

he was not far behind, keeping his lips pressed to yours, his hot seed spilling deep within your void, at that moment not caring about the consequences of not using protection. you both were grown adults, you both would accept said consequences if anything. still the looming thought did not stop you from revelling in the warm feeling of his seed filling you up.

he kept his cock inside you as he untied your wrist, breaking the kiss to do so much to your displeasure. he pulled out of your warmth, placing his belt upon your desk, watching the way his seed seeped from your void as you gathered yourself.

“better hurry up, doll” he pecked your lips sweetly, adjusting your skirt for you “don’t wanna be late to your next class”

.*•…………………..•⊹•…………………..•*.

#{ my fics : 🤍 }#hangman page smut #hangman page x reader #hangman page #hangman adam page masterlist #adam page x reader #adam page smut #adam page #cowboy shit #country boy i love youuuuu!#aew #wrestling smut #wrestling imagine #aew wrestling #aew fanfiction #aew imagine

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puppetboyx · 12 days

Note

hii! list five things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox of the last ten people who liked or reblogged something from you (no pressure) ☺️

okayy :3

death note. its honestly one of the things that make me the happiest right now. i really like the story and Mello's and Near's characters seemed to interest me the most lately

soceer. sounds pick me-ish, BUT recently i practiced playing soceer with some boys in my school, and they asked me to play with them sometime. and now we do it almost everyday in the school yard ^_^

writing (usually fanfiction). especially AUs. I love slowly building the world up. plus i usually come up with the ideas with my friends and we write it together

those "lost episode" creepypasta. i dont know why, im still in the phase when i get scared of creepypastas like Jeff the killer or Ben drowned for some reason. like, im aware that no way it would happen irl, but still 😭. But, with the lost episode ones, my brain is a 100% sure that i dont have anything to be scared of. since obviously, children's companies wouldn't put gorey elements in their shows

and sweets! i dont have too much to say abt this one i just love sugary stuff. my therapist reccomended me to eat chocolate before (or during if the teacher is nice) tests/exams, because i often get overly stressed by them o_o

#death note #sweets #idk

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sh1-n0bu · 4 months

Note

hiii!l

Wait your finals are still going on??? Ooooof, I just finished mine Tuesday and I feel you. Im still shaking at times due to the stress of it all despite being finished aubdjsh. 😭😭. I belive in youuu Nobu best of luckkk!!

Also student council in collage? Thats super impressive, I never joined one due to my nervousness but that's wild!

(Fr tho I'm a huge fan of your workk and I had no altered my life forever. I actually discovered you via sub!scara and sub!xiao and I'm not gonna lie you awakened something in me and I have never been the same since aaaajdbjdnsj.😫😫. Made me realize how much I truly want to make pretty people drown in pleasure ahdbjdndjajndjdnd 😅😅)

Anyway, good luck with everything!!!

(👁_👁) ✒️

me when someone says that my sub!character writing has awakened their inner dom:

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

anyways❗️i feel u bc i gave the exam of today while meeting ul with some friends to talk abt it (it was an online exam) and the place where we met up, some kids were having piano competition or sum sum and GOD they were playing boss themes in the background. we were literally on the verge of insanity

#nobu.nobu.chat #(👁️_👁️)✒️ anon

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therealpontius · 1 year

Text

Money! Money! Money!

I wrote this while being overly stressed with exams so that’s why the readers so moody sorry 🤞

Plot: you just cant get a break can you?…

Warnings: stress/choking/angst

You hadnt seen you boyfriend for while due to stressfull work, he had been back at his house for once to give you more room for equipment.

It was a scorching day and your schedule was filled with different scenes to film. Jeff liked your camera work the best so always expected you to film more than the rest.

You hadnt had the time to go see chris, bam screaming your name so he could film a couple of skate tricks that would most definitely not make it to the movie but he insisted you done them so he could try show ofd to the medic he had a huge crush on. After ten falls and seven different tricks you got impatient and just walked away, hearing him scream your name behind you and jeff shouting you over at the same time. On your walk over to jeff ehren accidentally ran into you making you drop your camera. "Fuck!" You gasped, picking up your camera as quick as it fell. Ehren had gone and hadnt even said sorry but you couldnt care, jeff still screamed for your name.

"What?!" You groaned finally reaching him "daves got a poop shot to film!" He groaned back, pointing towards dave who squatted over an empty icecream tub. "Hey y/n!" You hear chris shout from abit away, you choose to ignore him knowing that if you draw attention to him he wont leave your side and you really needed space to concentrate. "RECORDING IN THREE... TWO..." jeff called out, giving you enough time to get into focus. "Im dave england and this is..." he continued to shit into the tub, you covering you mouth to drown out your dry heaving noises "... chocolate icecream!" "Cut!" Some of the boys laugh but you just take a deep breath while you could "KNOXVILLE?" Jeff screams beside you breaking you away from your two second mediation. "WHAT?" "GET OVER HERE" the lanky man ran over with a drone.

"Y/n, take some pictures for the photo album with knoxville" jeff said walking away. You hold your hand up to your face and pinch the top of your nose, trying to drown out your stress “need a break doll?” “Yeah but like… ugh it doesnt matter just start the poses” “yes sir!” He smiles, saluting down to you. Johnny does poses such as lift his shirt up and pout as you just spammed the photo button just hoping for the best “hey pontius! Get over here and get some snaps, your little ladys photoing me right now!”

Silently you sigh, you loved chris so much and you loved how clingy he got but it was moments like theses you REALLY didnt need him clinging off you back.

“Were those even words?” You mutter under your breath “yes doll, they were words” johnny mutters back to you as if to say ‘i caught you’. “Hey sweetheart! Mind if i join?” Chris says, kissing your cheek from behind “no no not at all just be quick before jeff starts ordering me around again” you smile, catching his eye “yes ma’am”. Both the men pose together laughing their heads off when johnny put his tongue between his fingers like children. “Y/N?” You hear jeff scream. “Fuck sake, sorry boys ill catch up later” you turn round and swiftly start walking away from them towards the sound of your name. “Not so fast! Im coming with!” Chris says, wrapping his arm around your shoulder “chris baby im really just up to my eyes right now” “thats why im here to help!” Chris looked down at you with a loving smile like he was really going to try and not hold you back. “Right…”

“What took you so long? Steve-os going to recreate the fish scene from the series. A few others tried to film it but never got it i believe you can get it. Oh hey chris” jeff says, walking over to spike. “O’ get in frame its a busy day” you say sternly, fixing up your tripod “yes sir” he bites back, getting himself prepared “steve-o not today, my girlfriends very stressed” chris said in a tone which you werent sure if it was sarcasm or not. “THREE… TWO…” you counted down, nodding when you pressed record. “Im steve-o and im going to swallow this here alive fish and throw it back up!”

While he got up to his stupid shit you walked away from the camera a little, leaving it on its tripod. You closed your eyes to try calm down, the sound of steve-o throwing up and others laughing from god knows where giving you a migraine. “Babe?” You heard from chris, softly “babe?… baby?” “Chris not right now…” “no babe i need you…. Baby.” “WHAT?” you snap, facing him with an expression you regretted straight after “i think Steve-os choking” he shrugged, pointing to the man who very clearly was. “Oh fuck! MEDIC! MEDIC!” You scream, running up to the tall man. The medics quickly arrived and began giving him backblows to force the live fish out

“Why didnt you just tell me!” You shouted at chris, throwing your hands up to exaggerate your emotions “i was trying not to stress you out babe!” He raised his voice a little “look im sorry for raising my voice but if this” you point to steve-o who was still choking but getting the best help he could “doesnt work? Then hes going go die” chris’s eyes suddenly sink at the realisation that just because they do this stupid shit all the time doesnt mean they are immortal, at that the live fish goes flying from steve-os mouth and he gasps for air, falling to the ground. “Your a lucky man” you mutter, starting to pack your camera gear away.

Steve-o was whisked off by the medic team to their tent and chris just stood silent next to you, not sure what to do with himself. “Look ill see you later, im going to go gray if i stay here for a second longer” you state, trying to catch his eyes that looked anywhere but you, something he done when he felt uncomfortable. When you realised chris probably wasnt going to say bye you continued walking but quickly heard him catch up “im coming back to yours” “you are? Chris there isnt much room-“ “then we will make room, we need to be together right now” he slipped his hand into yours. “Jeff y/n needs a break shes going to go gray” “we cant afford it” jeff said sympathetically “please give her a break, theres six other camera men here today” Jeff looked around at the camera men who stood around aimlessly, their camera in hand with no purpose. “Fine, fuck. Just dont make this regular” jeff complained “thanks jeff we wont” chris smiles, heading to the car park and helping you into his car. “What about my car?” “We will get it tomorrow”.

The drive home you just closed your eyes and tried to slow your heart, chris’s hand rubbing your knee in care. “Thats us darling” you open your eyes to see his house, not your small shitty apartment “sorry i thought it would be better so you dont get stressed seeing the equipment” you wrap your self around his arm “thankyou baby” “well i dont want a gray girlfriend” you both laugh then eventually get out the car making your way to the door.

You head to the living room and turn on the big tv while chris headed to the kitchen, some woman was screeching about how her best friend made out with her brother. Just some shitty reality tv show. Next up was another mind numbing game show, a sign that spoke ‘MONEY! MONEY! MONEY!’ at the top “why is it always about money!” You grumble “because money can get you high” chris laughs from behind you “cheer up baby lets watch something else” he jumped over the couch, landing next to you with a bag of chocolate and crisps in his hands. “Figured you might be hungry?” “Always” you kiss his cheek, leaning into his chest.

Chris picks up the remote and puts on family guy, he always got a good laugh out of that show “you feeling any better?” He asks, stroking your shoulder softly “much better” you yawn into his chest…

#Spotify

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r-ene · 8 months

Text

Pros and Cons of being an Overloaded Student in Respiratory Therapy

during my 3rd year, where majority of the subjects are major subjects such as critical care management, airway management, mechanical ventilation and neonatal respiratory care, i took up more units than prescribed by the university due to being an irregular as a transferee (2nd year). and so i had 11 subjects with 31 to 33 units with 6 days a week of classes. i was leaning on writing how i survived it but rather i think "10 pros and cons" would be a bit better for those considering to undergo this kind of process.

this is from my own experiences tho, so... yk

Pros

you get better at time management. you drown, otherwise.

less procrastination. like #1, you drown if you do.

you get better at juggling loads of school work

you get better at putting boundaries - your body knows when it's time to study, time for family and God, time for rest (although you still need to get reminded), time to socialize

your focus becomes... great (most times)

you get disciplined.

you appreciate your early mornings, rest days, people and God (should you ever be a believer). i personally love my early mornings where i spend about 10 mins on average reading the Bible before classes, it helps me cope with all the stress and made me more optimistic. i also observed things are better (ex. grades are higher in quizzes) when i don't forget to communicate with God before starting my day

its a good practice. as a future healthcare worker, even for my internship there would be schedules of 12-16 hours aside from the regular 8 hour shift scheduled about 5 days a week, with saturdays being lecture or research days, it's a good help.

you are able to find ways how to study more effectively. i personally figured out what study style/s are best for me and when i should utilize study style A (standard) and study style B (for exams, quizzes) and so on.

you learn to compete only with yourself. most times we compare our progress and grades with others when actually, we do best when we only look at ourselves and compete with ourselves yesterday and move forward with it because you understand that you are a unique case and individual and so are others.

Cons

quick burnout = it takes a toll on your health especially when exams come where all classes would require a written one (practical exams such as in skills lab, performing airway suctioning or arterial blood gas were a blessing to me)

major subjects = major requirements. sometimes you forget that your minors need some attention too at times

i only had 1 day of rest (sundays). i love going on worship services but sometimes you just want to rest and sleep the whole day ??

you get very, very anxious and jittery when you dont have anything to do.

sleep gets put off when there are tons to do despite being good in organization and time management. i once went 38 hours without sleep on an exam week, i think it was finals ?

...it was very difficult to study for exams held on the last day, especially during finals. i loved pulmonary disease management and hemodynamics but i was just so exhausted i picked rest over studying otherwise my vertigo might act up

when bombarded with tasks (ex. case study + other major presentations or tasks all together), it's difficult not to spiral. therefore, i suggest to take a walk, especially if you have a baby doggo

if you live with your family, its a bit difficult when they fail to understand you have tons to do on a daily + need some rest. i live with my family of 6 members and sometimes we get into an argument with how im unable to help around especially while im resting after class

it is very difficult to schedule dates with friends or siblings or s/o (i don't have a significant other so that's one less thing to worry about, haha). oftentimes when my older sister asks me to accompany her to the mall for a date or just as company, i spend most of the time in coffee bean, studying. sometimes i rush there when there's an online quiz scheduled in the middle of the day even without lectures.

you gotta sacrifice a lot of things. as you can see above: you sacrifice good health, time with loved ones and yourself, binge watching or gaming (me personally i set a rule if im not on a semestral break i dont play games), good sleep, difficult to commit to other things (uni organizations or work, etc) and etc etc

this being said, i don't discourage or encourage anyone to become an overloaded student as it depends on your unique situation. with mine, my faculty wanted me to supposedly join my batchmates for this year's internship but i was still left behind because there were no offerings for the subjects i needed to complete everything during the summer term and so... yeah, hahaha

other than that, id say i did very, very well both semesters !! not to boast, but it was something i worked hard on and sometimes you just gotta be proud of yourself :)

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