#I'm really not even saying anything

[challenge-ant]

#I like it when he makes that face #lolol #that’s all #it's a genuine moment #bid for a genuine reaction. or. something #like when he hurt himself filming for snt like two years ago looool #the first thing I ever gifed I think #ant going no it really hurt and dec just doing his evil laugh again #I'm really not even saying anything #I love this fandom I can just post half thoughts all the time

[tubbytarchia]

I don't know what this is all I know is that LimL Joel makes me really emotional

#I know he has a tendency to go deranged on his red lives but idk something about him beginning to lose it after Jimmy died and killing Grian #joel smallishbeans #smallishbeans fanart #trafficblr #Again its his red life shenanigans but... If only Jimmy had known how affected someone was by his death. I'm choosing to believe this #and him then going out like a sad pathetic wet cat even with Grian's sacrifice... He really deserves a win one of these days lmao please #Also I cant stop thinking about how Jimmy wouldn't have left him. Grian was sensible to and most players probs would have #Joel really does become a lost cause so its fair and Grian did still care (and went to say goodbye as well as sacrifice his time for him) #But Jimmy would have stuck by even if Joel were in this state (and they'd both get themselves killed pathetically but) #And Joel having shown such genuine care for Jimmy and concern over his limited time... man anything w Jimmy makes me so emotional lol #I love them so #oh Ig about the art itself. I dont like it but hey thats how it tends to go when you try smth new. And no shame in trying #but if one person likes this then yayy I will still feel accomplished and happy #Im looking at this again and hey its not that bad actually yay I love to approve of my own art. self love hell yea #tubby art

[matchbookstory]

I do think it's really interesting that Harry can say the same things to Kim that he said to Jean before Jean left him in Martinaise, but I think it speaks more to Harry and his current state than it says about their dynamic. Sure, it's contentious, we know this. Jean is clearly upset and bitter about it, but it really has nothing to do with him, does it?

Harry can run the same script on Kim because these are his weapon words. This is the self isolation script. These are the words that demonstratively WORK to drive people away from him. So he can finish killing himself. Even if he doesn't remember that's what he's doing.

Because it's about spinning the same tape again and again. Cycles he can't break. Dream the same dream over and over. Obliterate yourself, wake up, remember, obliterate yourself again. Drive your partner away. Now drive your new partner away. Decide to kill yourself. Change your mind, embrace the world. Be beaten down and decide to kill yourself again. Wake up. Remember.

After life--death. After death--life again.

He is the infernal engine, cycling eternally.

Unless, somehow, this time, he can escape. And this starts here, maybe. Kim will not fuck off. Kim would be glad to cramp his style. He actively enjoys style cramping, even.

(It starts in other places, too, of course.)

#takes a massive hit off of the worst preroll in the world #disco elysium #harry du bois #kim kitsuragi #jean vicquemare #I'm softly kindly gently requesting a post free of jeancourse #this was just a springboard; it's really not about him #does anyone...get what I'm saying. am i even saying anything #believe it or not i had a day when i could write coherent meta #after the disco #can opener sweetdream

[welcometogrouchland]

(ID in alt) I literally said I was gonna post this month's ago and then never had the wherewithal to describe it and so I didn't Lmao (said with pain). But since I'm thinking of opening my commissions I figured I should remind ppl that I. Yknow. Can draw.

Lots of Steph here (I had major art block making all of these and my brain worms for her kept me going) + some sprinkles of stephcass for Cass nation to enjoy!

#dc comics #dc #stephanie brown #cassandra cain #jason todd #(yes for the teddy bear. it counts) #batgirl #batgirls #mine #< keep forgetting to tag my art as that I'm terrible 😭 #ANYHOW I'm slowly getting back into drawing again after my last ipad got nuked (cant think abt that or ill cry) and i finished uni #oh yeah j finished my first year of uni btw. i went to an Olivia Rodrigo concert like a week or 2 ago. I've been busy lol #but yeah it's looking like I've got a fun summer of bottom feeding ahead of me now that I've officially been told i got passed over for that #-comic job i applied for. lol. lmao even #it's fine honestly it was a pretty daunting prospect i just have to find a way to fill the time by myself now #I've plenty of comics to read so that's nice. got wayyy into mark waids DD run recently (mostly for Chris Samnee's art) #so that's been fun! i have my empowered omnibus (embarrassing and kept under my bed <3) i have TT year 1 i have huntress and WW #uhhh i got flash 1 minute war. lots of good stuff! #so hopefully i don't go. completely feral from lack of stimulation #also hopefully commissions will be a thing i can do #godddd there's many mkre things i want to draw. i got too enamoured w my own bad theory and now I've drawn tim!bats #but unfortunately now i only want to draw tim!bats being laughed at my the batfamily bc seriously tim?? really?? #< it's literally probably not going to happen but I've invested myself in this terrible future for some reason #imagine damian trying to robin for tim!bats for 1 (one) night and the next morning he doesn't say anything he just moves to bludhaven #he can't take this shit #oh so many ideas... #ANYWAY. ues. finally art. now if you like it. consider commissioning me (in 2 to 3 business weeks <3) #(no pressure)

[bakudekublogblog]

talking to normal people about mha is always so enlightening because someone told me they didn't like season six and i was like???? THE BIBLE??????? YOU DONT LIKE THE BIBLE??? BAKUGOU KATSUKI RISING?? THE APOLOGY??? THE CHASING AFTER HIM TO FIGHT SHIGARAKI, THE REVEAL KATSUKI HAS BEEN WORRIED ABOUT IZUKU, IZUKU'S FERAL RAGE WHEN KATSUKI IS STABBED, KATSUKI BEING THE ONE TO FIND IZUKU AND THEN THE ONE TO BRING HIM HOME??? YOU DONT ENJOY THE SACRED TEXTS?? and then i'm like oh right not everyone is a fujoshi high on that sweet, sweet bkdk yaoi

#bkdk #bakudeku #it took all of my willpower not to be like my brother in christ i'm a fujo i'm gonna like anything that bkdk appears in #i'm not here for the powerscaling or the pacing or if they should be third years #i tried to say it like “oh lol i know everything that's gonna happen hhaha i am one of the crazies who stays up for leaks” #but i wanted to be like listen man i'm really only here for the homoeroticism idc about whatever it is youre talking about #not that i dont love mha as a whole i think it's got such a fun sandbox world and cast #it just feels like someone being like omg tell me if that new restaurant is good #and i'm like what the fuck i'm in the kitchen doing cocaine with the cooks #i was a waitress i'm allowed to say this #like we are not consuming the same thing #i'm in the goddamn trenches my emotional state depends on how homoerotic mha is gonna be #i'm in the deep underbelly of bkdk hands and soulmates and yearning i dont even know what you're talking about #i like mha an annoying amount #i wanted to be like remember when i came into work skipping and singing that was because we got bkdk sunset/ptsd scene #i'm a little freak goblin dont ask me if it's good i dont care that it's good I CARE THAT ITS MINE but also fuck you its good #it's the best fuck off if you dont like it you arent worthy of it #hori this is why you should give in and make bkdk canon the fujos are the ones who really love you

[spielzeugkaiser]

I love your art soooo much-it gives me life!! 🥰🥰🥰

I have a question about Milek and Jaskier! Milek says they fought before Jask went missing-what did they fight about? Did Milek say something he shouldn’t have? 👀😢 is there ANGST?

Also does Geralt know Mileks plush friend is called Roach? Because surely that’s a clue that Milek is his…(I love this universe so much)!!🥹❤️❤️❤️

[MASTERPOST] That was the last conversation they had before Milek stormed out - and when he came back, Jaskier was. gone. The thing is, Jaskier knows what Milek is interested in (and he is not even wrong about that, Milek has an interest in medicine, and helping people, and I think when they met he was Shanis biggest fan) and I think Jaskier is aware that some of the conflict does have its roots in Milek not wanting to leave him, even if they get really heated and ugly in their arguments. Milek shouldn't feel like he has to care for him, or have to protect him and at times I think Jaskier feels quite ashamed, which leads him to being way too unrelenting at times - especially if he thinks he's doing something to protect Milek.

#jaskier #the witcher #geraskier lovechild #artists on tumblr #omegaverse #I think if they argue Milek is saying stuff he shouldn't all the time #I think for Milek the part that makes him feel really bad is that he KNOWS that Jaskier would always choose having him again and again #because he KNOWS that he loves him more than anything else #but he still implied that he doesn't know - and he knows what he said was cruel #but he also !! is so angry #because Jaskier always treats him like he knows what's best for him and. let it be true - it still makes him FURIOUS #he isn't a little kid anymore #and he wants to HELP he loves his father and he knows that Jaskier gives and gives and gives especially when it comes to him #he doesn't need a fancy education in an academy where he'll be just the bastard kid again #he just needs a Pa who doesn't absolutely run himself to the ground #and I think he finally wants to meet Geralt too #also I'm trying to do a thing here which I think shows how secure their relationship truly is #because Geralt sees Milek as a quite sensible (if sometimes a bit hotheaded) young man - who is quite mature for his age #which he CAN be #but Geralt is also basically a stranger even if Milek knows he's his dad - and he tries to impress him naturally - ofc he wants to be liked #with Jaskier? who has his one true emotionally secure relationship with? #moody teenanger - but also allowing himself to be childish at times - crying shouting teasing - exploding sometimes #because he never ever had to question their relationship once #he can just let loose

[dootznbootz]

I think people sleep on this moment in the Odyssey...

If I'm wrong, not getting full context, or see something that isn't there, feel free to give evidence to explain why.

Here he crept under a pair of bushes, one an olive, the other a wild olive, which grew from the same stem with their branches so closely intertwined that when the winds blew moist not a breath could get inside, nor could the rain soak right through to the earth.

(Book 5, Rieu)

I think this is about Penelope and him.

Obviously, their marriage bed is made from an Olive tree. If it's just about Athena then why are there two mentioned? Why did Homer mention two when he could've just said he took refuge under one? Or a completely different type of tree? Why mention them being intertwined?

One an olive: Penelope, who has been with society and "safe" in Ithaca ("Safe" because of the suitors)

One wild: Odysseus, who has dealt with literal monsters and immortals and has just escaped from Calypso. Literally naked and filthy, a "wild man".

"which grew from the same stem with their branches": Them both being together at first, before being separated.

"so closely intertwined that when the winds blew moist not a breath could get inside, nor could the rain soak right through to the earth.": Despite being separated, they are still "intertwined". Whether you want to think of it as them being likeminded or simply connected, even though they are apart, nothing could get in between them. 🥺

I don't know what else Homer could be referring to other than them.

#It's funny to me as even though she's not always mentioned when he retells his tale to the Phaeacians. The narrator mentions her CONSTANTLY #Because even if Odysseus doesn't say it. He's thinking about her often #honestly I...I don't think it COULD be anything else but I'm sure people will be mad that the simp loves his wife. 🤷 #This part is the reason why I mention them calling the bed their “nest” as that's what THIS part calls it too. and I find it really cute #It was a nest where he SHOULD have stayed in with his family but no... :'D #half-empty nest😞 #also it could be him comforting himself??? He's been forced to be in beds he doesn't want to be in for YEARS #Now. he's free and while it's not “fancy”. but at least it's SOMEWHAT like his own #greek mythology #tagamemnon #odyssey #the odyssey #penelope #odysseus #odypen #odysseus and penelope #odysseus x penelope #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #essay

[lunarharp]

What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)

#witch hat tag #orufrey #er.... i'm too tired to have anything to say..i worked several days on this. #wait.. didn't i say just recently here that i probably wouldn't ever depict 'what if alaira is qifrey's sort-of ex'. What's going on #i don't even remember deciding to draw this..it's all a blur..i'm not sure why i WOULD decide to draw delicate scenes in my head #that i wouldn't really want to share with anyone/discuss so why did i draw it... #some part of me really really wants to draw things that are more and more true to myself... #maybe because of my alienation with most romance/shipping/dynamics the rest of the world depicts. #orufrey really is perfectly suited to me - what i read in the text and what is in my head. well anyway #i am TIRED of drawing poses and angles and..maybe now i will actually take a break from drawing bc of the tediousness of Angles #btw it really is a 'stretch of time' . . . assuming witches graduate age 18-20 #well orufrey are canonically 30-ish. they've only had agott around for presumably about TWO years (?) bc she took the test age 10 #and it feels like oru moving in/unknown atelier acquisition/building (?) .. i guess that could be a year or so before agott at most #(she was the first disciple) so... ????????? What about the other 7 or so years ?!?!?!!?!?! Unemployed Brimhat Hatred era #that time is very nebulous. after qifrey went to the tower i feel like it's been implied he and oru drifted apart a little. #certainly they didn't live together at first... no way. that doesn't feel like how it is based on things oru has said about becoming Eye #idk. I'm tired now. i don't usually think of alaira as necessarily qifrey's ex and this being how things went in that 'sliver of time'. #i usually prefer the idea that they have their first kiss with each other in their 30s cause That's Just The Orufrey Lifestyle #just felt like making a more relatable alternative view of my own Cai Orufrey Canon one time. btw im a big monoshipper and it hurt a bit #let's leave it there. this is surely the most i've worked on a 'single' art - though now i realise just how much longer the fic took :')

[project-sekai-facts]

How are we feeling about ensekai’s emu3 translation!!! (I’m mad)

(if you remember the 3 whole posts i made when asahi got de-gayed on EN you'll know i am mad too and that this is probably going to get long)

i don't like to be too cynical but it was so obvious that they were going to change that line, i had a feeling since the event first released on JP and after the incident with Asahi where I went through and tracked down multiple other examples of EN removing queer subtext it became clear to me that in no way shape or form was "emu-chan really loves nene-chan" making it to EN without getting changed. what i didn't expect was them changing Nene's line after Luka's comment, which actually makes this whole situation far worse than many of their other instances of toning down queer subtext.

for anyone who isn't aware of what happened, in chapter 5 of the current Emu event, there's a scene where Nene, Rui and the Virtual Singers are talking about what would cheer Emu up. The vsingers all talk about how much Emu loves spending time with Nene, leading to the following exchange

If you look for them, any fan TL of this scene will be something similar to this:

Luka: ...Fufu. Emu-chan really loves Nene-chan, doesn't she? Nene: Th-that's nothing special...

EN's official translation is this:

So what's the issue? I'll start with Luka's part. In the original text, she uses the word daisuki, which can mean to "like a lot" or "love". It's a word you will see frequently in the idol/idol-adjacent genre of games, due to its ambiguity in that it can be read as either platonic or romantic when used towards a person, and often will be used in ambiguous situations so that it's harder to confirm the writers' intentions either way. so here, fans of the emu/nene ship could view the fact that emu loves spending her time with nene as more on the romantic side, but people who don't like the ship could view it as platonic and move on.

while they didn't translate daisuki directly, Luka's line still works, and still contains the ambiguity that works as ship tease in the original text. it's a perfectly fine localisation that still conveys the original intent. despite that, there is something to be said about EN's consistent refusal to translate daisuki as love in most instances when it's not used on An/Kohane (but then again, EN has literally teased An/Kohane on their twitter account so is it all that surprising?).

Here's some examples:

Aibou no koto ga daisuki de / he loves his partner -> he cares about his partner very much (The Power of Unity chapter 7 when Kaito is comparing Arata to Akito and Toya)

HARUKA-CHAN, DAISUKI DAYOOOO!!! / HARUKA-CHAN, I LOOOOOVEEE YOU!!! -> You're the best!!! (Dear Me, As I Was Back Then chapter 4 when minori is at an ASRUN concert. this one isn't actually that great of a localisation)

Honachan no koto daisuki dakara. Kore de iinda yo. / I love Honachan, so this is fine. -> I want what's best for her. And this is it. (Leo/need main story chapter 14 after Saki tells Honami she won't bother her anymore)

Minna daisuki de - taisetsuna tomodachi na no / I love them all - they're my dearest friends -> They're all amazing, and very dear to me. (Leo/need main story chapter 17. this isn't good either)

What's particularly amusing about that last one is that there's a second official translation for it that I assume was done by JP staff (since EN never promoted doing the Journey to Bloom subs like they did back when they provided subs for Petit SEKAI) that actually keeps the word daisuki as love.

Yeah. I love all my friends - and they mean the world to me.

It's a better localisation than the official EN team one.

Questionable localisation choices aside, Luka's line is fine and is actually in line with the original. The issue with this localisation very much lies with Nene's part, because that is an entirely new line.

In the original text, Nene's "that's just normal" or "that's nothing special" or however you choose to TL it, is meant to be her questioning Luka's statement, since all the things that the other vsingers said that Emu liked were pretty normal things like going shopping and playing video games with nene. To Nene, these things are normal activities for them to do together, so she gets embarrassed by the fact that Luka concludes from that information that Emu loves Nene. When I dissect it like that I think you can really tell what the writers were going for here lol.

"That's just us being friends" does still convey the idea that Nene thinks these activities aren't anything out of the ordinary and she isn't sure why the vsingers are picking these out as some of Emu's favorite things to do, but it's very different from the original line. "But those are just normal things we do together" is something I just came up with on the spot, but it's a lot closer to the original text and still conveys the same meaning. The fact they changed the line to "that's just us being friends" is, honestly, not even subtle that they're covering up queer subtext. The original scene was very clearly written in as ship tease, and EN mentioning "friends" for no reason, especially since the word nor anything close to it was not used in the original, is instantly a red flag because it's like the go-to for queerbaiting and censorship. This was intentional. There was no need for them to specify that the relationship is platonic, Luka's part is ambiguous for a reason so that fans can view it how they like.

Just to top all this off, here's Rin's original line just before that Luka+Nene interaction:

Oh, and! And! She said that playing games with Nene-chan is also super fun!

And here's Rin's line from the official EN translation:

That's not the same thing, but even more weirdly, the incorrect part (super fun->really loves) is a correct translation for the part changed in Luka's line. So, they can do it, they are willing to say "really loves", just not in the right places. Maybe because Rin's part is less personal than Luka's part? It's strange actually, this isn't the first time they've done this either. Off the top of my head I can think of an example from Shiho's Varied Kindness 2* story where they translated the word "suki" as really loves, despite that being much stronger than the original word used (and the fact that daisuki is used a lot in the Leo/need stories and it's incredibly rare if not entirely unknown for them to translate it correctly).

It's not subtle that they're trying to remove implications of the characters possibly being queer, they did it in curtain call and they did it in walk on and on, and multiple times before then too. And considering some of the content in this year's events and the amount of times they say daisuki alone, it's gonna keep happening. honestly i hate the fact that i keep trying to justify the translations in these posts. these translations are intentional. what happened in the curtain call translation back in october says enough. when a character who uses explicitly romantic language towards another guy passes as a straight character in the translation you know they're doing it on purpose.

oh and once again, it's only the EN server that has this issue. The scene in question was translated almost word-for-word on the TW and KR servers.

read fan translations. they're better than what EN gives us and people put a lot of effort into them.

#since the EN translation qualifies as a leak i am scheduling this to post when the event drops #asks #mod talks #i'm going to leave this in the tags because i don't want to make the post any longer #but something that's been really annoying to see recently on twt has been the gradual uptick of players saying that there's no queer #characters/subtext/etc in the game outside mizuki being trans. and i do wonder if EN's consistent habit of toning down #or outright removing moments of heavy subtext and other more ambiguous shiptease moments has anything to do with it. #that or people live under a rock because even EN keeps most of An and Kohane's relationship intact and there's still plenty of #moments that were impossible to edit or tone down due to being plot relevant or being part of longer interactions that wouldn't make sense #if part of it was changed. like the An wedding event. #eh maybe people are just ignorant. #but anyway it does bug me immensely that EN-only players are getting a censored version of the game. it's 2024. staff can do better. #also like i mentioned in the part about rin. they /add in/ things occasionally. so why the hell are they removing so much?

[mari-lair]

We are told at the very start of the manga that "if you want to know a person, you need to find out what makes them angry"

So I want to talk about Gon, and what makes him angry.

Gon is hard to anger, especially for a kid: He wasn't angry at his dad for abandoning him and never visiting, he wasn't angry at Mito for lying that his parents died, he wasn't angry when Leorio made everyone lose 50 hours at the trick tower despite revealing later in Hanzo's fight that his hope to meet his 'amazing hunter dad' would vanish if couldn't finish the exam on his first try like Ging did (there is no "better luck in the next exam" for Gon), he never gets jealous when Killua shows more strength or knowledge than him even though they are the same age and he used to be very powerful on his little island, and so on.

But is not hard for Gon to get angry for the ones he loves and admires: Be it angry for their safety or about people disrespecting their wishes.

His anger is stronger when his friend's lives are at risk, their safety triumphs over his wish to respect what they want.

But he doesn't care about his own life.

He is never angry when people hurt him. As Hanzo had put it, even injuries as severe as broken bones don't matter to Gon.

But Gon was visibly frustrated in Hanzo's fight.

He wants to win. And he wants to be the one to win not for Hanzo to forfeit. He wants proof that he is strong and capable and worthy of being in the last phase, aware he was only here because Hisoka let him pass.

The only person Gon feels any anger towards at the end of the exam is himself for being a hunter but not feeling like he is worth it of the title.

Gon is always the most angry at himself.

When Kite kills a foxbear, punching Gon for trespassing in their territory, Gon isn't angry at him or the fox bear that attacked him, he puts the full blame on himself and tries to make up for it by raising Kon.

When Killua goes 'back home' he gets angry at Illumi for making Killua do things he doesn't want, but he also blames himself for not being there for Killua when his fight with Illumi happened.

Similarly, his instinct when he learned, without a doubt, that Kite is beyond saving, was to blame himself.

He isn't thinking about Pitou, isn't even seeing them, blinded by Kite and his own guilt.

This quest for 'revenge' was never about Pitou, it was always about healing Kite. And since Pitou can't heal the dead, Gon blames himself, he is angry at himself.

Pitou is the one that killed him. Killua was the one that was terrified by Pitou's aura and knocked Gon unconscious to run. Kite was the one that told them to run. Gon is far from the "reason kite died" but he loves and respect Kite and Killua, so he obviously doesn't see anything wrong, he never once blames Killua for what happened.

In fact... He had thanked him

And Gon is genuinely grateful here.

It breaks my heart how much he loves and trusts his friends, eager to share all his good times and victories with them. Wanting them by his side always, no matter how personal his journey is.

But when something bad happens he wants to 'make it better' alone. Is never "we will fix this" is always "I will", because he doesn't want to trouble them, be it by his own emotions, or outside dangers.

Gon never blames his friends, so he is the one responsible when bad things happen, the only one that needs to fix any problem. And if death is a risk, he will immediately assign the lethal job to himself, and himself only.

Gon isolates himself when things get hard but he still doesn't want to be alone. He craves company and support more than ever when he is hurt.

But he doesn't like to feel weak or helpless, so asking for help or opening up is extremely hard. He mostly just gets angry at himself for feeling how he feels and refuse to make it someone else's problem.

He didn't cry after stealing Hisoka's badge but he was feeling helpless and unworthy so he sucked it up and went to do better, it was only after Kurapika asked directly if he was okay that he lowered his walls and found himself crying.

He is just a kid, he can't process his self hate, frustration, or guilt well, and his way to feel better is to help others, be useful and powerful. But sometimes that's not enough, or he simply can't help.

So he constantly finds himself in situations where he gets injured, physical pain is something that he is more used to, that it's easier to process: He let a foxbear cub claws his shoulders after his actions make Kite kill the cub's mother, he let 'puppet kite' hit him even when he learned its robotic attack pattern, he feels weak and frustrated because 'The Bomber' wasn't taking him seriously and he hates feeling weak, so he delayed Killua's plan and got his hands destroyed to prove to himself that he can do it.

But helping others is still the clear priority over hurting himself: The best example to show this is when he visits the Zoldycks. He never took his anger about the Zoldyck family's isolation on Canary when he visited Killua, letting her knock him down again and again in silence for a while before expressing his frustrations with how unfair it is that he need to go through trials to visit a friend.

And when Killua's mom visited, he prioritized canary over his goal.

Gon is just... kind. Is far easier for him to care about strangers than it is for him to be angry.

Gon is smart, but he is not the best at figuring out people when they don't tell him how they feel, especially when Gon is annoyed or unsatisfied.

So I am not surprised he assumed cool-headed killua, who hides all his pain and is so reliable and mature, "always cleaning up Gon's mess", wasn't in pain in the chimera ant arc. It’s like having someone say “be calm” when you’re angry, stating cold facts that only make you feel more incompetent in your emotional state.

It hurt because it feels like Killua, whose opinion Gon values so much, doesn't care about Kite, his super important mentor figure. And since Pitou’s behavior makes it so he can’t use them as an outlet for his emotions, this hint of anger and betrayal at Killua makes him lash out without thinking about his friend.

But even in his blinding guilt and hatred, Killua is important enough to still be able to calm him down, and reminds him of his goal.

Gon doesn't understand Killua is hurt (since killua doesn't tell him) but at least... He is not alone.

"I can't wait" --> He genuinely feels like Killua is as calm as he pretends to be, only he is the 'helpless and in pain' one in Gon's mind and so Killua could easily wait, but he personally can't. He is alone in his pain.

"how long must we wait?" --> Killua is here. Gon never feels truly alone with Killua by his side, he at least has the comfort of an anchor in these trying times.

Killua, who feels unwanted, hurt, and useless, also misunderstands Gon and leaves when Gon needed company the most. Is none of their faults, but it does make Gon's already incredibly bad state even worst.

There is no one but himself to calm him down when he hit his breaking point, and Gon isn't kind to himself.

His 'fight' with Pitou wasn't revenge. It was a failed attempt to "get kite back" to "fix him" which failed, and he couldn't deal with the resulting grief, so he turned it all into a suicide attempt.

To me, Gon gets angry when he feels inadequate or that a loved one deserves better, he has self-centered tunnel vision when he gets angry, so he doesn't realize his anger-fueled actions might trouble others, but when he does he will make an effort to set aside his own goals for others.

He is a good kid, a genuinely good kid with no self-love that is surrounded by adults that usually view him as a monster or a "admirable powerhouse" first and a child second, and it takes an enormous amount of strain to make him break.

He is a very strong kid, I wanna hug him.

#hxh #gon freecs #hunter x hunter #I still have so much more to talk about Gon... he make me so full of hope and depressed at the same time #but everyone is so smart in the hxh fandom i feel like i'm not really saying anything new #even if i do have too many feelings about this boy (my son!) to stay quiet #i'll try to not delete this like a scaredy cat tho #character analysis #gon freecss

[calware]

head in hands. beforus and alternia are both canonically patriarchal societies

#if i see someone say it's matriarchal one more time i'm going to start throwing rocks #i really do think that this misconception is so common because people just. skipped openbound and did not hear porrim blatantly explain it #but also if you think about it i think that you can figure out that it was patriarchal even without reading anything porrim says

[azaracyy]

a lesson on good karma digimon survive week 2024 day 4: supporting characters

#digimon #gomamon #digimon survive #survive week #survive week 2024 #rambling ahead. you don't have to read the tags beyond bc there's nothing that important tbh... you can just look at the art... #exhausted from being out and doing housework yesterday. then got a last-minute job with very urgent deadline today #finished everything but yeah basically i did anything but art so #irl do be like that aint it #anyway it's been a long time since i played survive and my memory isn't that good #but i always remember the part where we had to protect the gomamon #and later they showed us a path via the dam allowing the team to continue exploring #it reminded me of just how important it is to be nice and do good things whenever and wherever possible #and be mindful with the not-so-good things you do and say #be it good or bad. karma is real even if you don't know when it will get back at you #and you know in visual novel settings. whatever choice you make really determines what happens later on #yeah believe it or not i end up thinking stuff like that by helping a bunch of adorable seal mons... #mmm i'm officially behind now so i might as well take my time while also rest a bit haha ;; #this week has been fun with survive week tho fr. even though i came in unprepared (when will i change) #gotta keep surviving #png

[writeitinsharpie]

gdi why did the queer video essayist i liked turn out to be a plagerizer

#sharpie says shit #AND during finals season?? when i would be listening to video essays???? #james somerton #is the one i'm talking about #hbomberguy #plagarism and you(tube) #i liked the videos! turns out i liked the ideas he was passing off as his own i guess #i even did a cursory check a few months back and couldn't find anything really problematic about him so i just didn't look further #welp guess i'll just watch overly sarcastic productions #(red and blue you better cite your sources properly and continue not being shitty)

[thepoisonroom]

'I flirted with the idea that instead of being trans that I was just a cross-dresser (a quirk, I thought, that could be quietly folded into an otherwise average life) and that my dysphoria was sexual in nature, and sexual only. And if my feelings were only sexual, then, I wondered, perhaps I wasn’t actually trans.

I had read about a book called The Man Who Would Be Queen, by a Northwestern University professor who believed that transwomen who were attracted to women were really confused fetishists, they wanted to be women to satisfy an autogynephilia. And though I first read about this book in the context of its debunkment and disparagement, I thought about the electricity of slipping on those tights, zipping up those boots, and a stream of guilt followed. Maybe this professor was right, and maybe I was only a fetishist. Not trans, just a misguided boy.

About a year later, on the Internet, I come across a transwoman who added a unique message to the crowd refuting this professor. Oh, I wish I remember who this woman was, and I wish even more that I could do better than paraphrase her, but I remember her saying something like this: “Well, of course I feel sexy putting on women’s clothing and having a woman’s body. If you feel comfortable in your body for the first time, won’t that probably mean it’ll be the first time you feel comfortable, too, with delighting in your body as a sexual thing?”'

-Casey Plett, Consciousness

#this quote always moves me almost to tears when i remember it #i'm not a trans woman and i don't share the author's specific experiences with transition #but it really moves me that she frame transition as joyfully giving yourself permission to approach your body #not as something that has to be disciplined and deprived and made small in all these various ways #but as a means for experiencing pleasure and joy and delight and for insisting that our feelings and desires are worth #valuing and exploring and treasuring #i always used to think of prioritizing those things for myself as selfish and irresponsible #but who does it harm to want to experience pleasure in your own body? #it's such a beautifully simple and powerful switch to have flip in your head #and equally why are we forced to deny our own pleasure in transition and anything else related to our bodies in the name of moral rectitude #this is why i get so confused and pissed off when other trans people are fatphobic for example #like why are you so invested in politics of shame and disgust that never had any purpose other than #violently disciplining people as if they've violated moral codes by existing in a body #to say nothing of white people being racist in gay and trans communities #like again this system of violence is foundational to homophobia and transphobia #so why are you acting like it has nothing to do with you #even if you are unmoved by the urgency of other people's suffering which btw you should be moved by #what do you hope to gain by acting a collaborator and handmaiden to those systems #Casey Plett #she really is one of my favorite authors i wish more non-canadians read her #this quote is from a series of columns she did ont transition and every single one is a banger #i love when she talks about the people-pleasing elements of dysphoria and transition denial #she's so sharp about noting how many of us deny our own dysphoria on the grounds that others like and validate our bodies #that's how i always felt during my cis conventionally feminine era #it pleased other people so much and also that reception felt so hollow and joyless to me because i hated it #i get less of that positive feedback but that feels so unimportant next to the joy and pleasure i get to experience #said with the understanding that i'm very privileged in being able to prioritize those things without fear. but it was a switch flip #personal nonsense

[taylortruther]

I feel like the gender dynamics are a major part of the widespread fascination with taylor/travis tbh but would be curious for your thoughts if you feel comfortable sharing

i'd be interested in your thoughts tbh. my very summarized thoughts are that... the world loves a prom king and queen like travis and taylor because at the end of the day, our (general) view of gender is still very traditional. and it's great that they are a power couple but they also still neatly slot into our perception of gender in het relationships.

ie, travis is extremely masculine (in looks, career, wealth, status), but he's emotionally evolved, which makes him very appealing. but the masculinity is still essential to the appeal. (this is what got me in trouble last time sooooooo i am bracing myself here.)

actually, taylor and travis both subvert a big part of their expected gender roles: travis is a very masculine but emotional guy, "written by a woman." taylor is very feminine, but she's also extremely ambitious, career-minded, and wealthy.

so their relationship is extremely traditional in a lot of ways but i also think about how their financial/career equality makes them a power couple. and even the term power couple is full of gendered expectations.

#i do not think i'm saying anything revolutionary or even edgy here btw but like the reaction in my inbox last time... #...made it seem like i was saying something really rude

[natelia-aldelliz]

Cue Gaz and Price's horrified faces, that I sketched but didn't have the energy to actually draw (also, Ghost in the first panel is angry about Gaz calling Soap 'Johnny', how dare he)

Gaz : Oh my god bruv what did you do to your hair?? Ya know some strands are supposed to be the same length, right?

Price : Leave the poor man alone, he's already been ravaged by a vampire *snorts*

Gaz : True, lmao gotta chill there, Soap, but really though, how are ya cutting your hair, with kitchen scissors? Oh my god don't tell me you're using your knife

Ghost :

Gaz : You're using your knife, aren't you

Ghost : I mean, it's very sharp, it's basically a razor

(disclaimer that Gaz's opinions about Soap's hairstyle are not shared by the artist, i actually adore his little mohawk)

#cod mw2 #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick #captain john price #ghostsoap #soapghost #i originally intended to colour it but honestly too much work for my little overloaded brain #like i usually write novels in the tags but i don't even have the brain power to think of what to say lmao #anyway thank you for all people liking reblogging or commenting on my drawings i really appreciate it #but i'm terrified to interract with people so i don't say anything but i still really appreciate it #i read everything you have to say about my drawings with a huge smile on my face while happy stimming it genuinely makes my day