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bucky-iss-bae · 4 years

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My Girl (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

A/N: I started writing this at 11.30pm and its now 12.50am, I accidently wrote it. it was supposed to be a drabble, but it turned out to be more than that. Sorryyyy.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (AU)

Fandom: MCU/Marvel

Prompts: “Love is Stupid” – “Take my Jacket, its cold outside” – “I’ll walk you home” “Don’t look at me like that”

Warnings: Possesiveness?? The slightest bit of smut that its actually incredibly tame. Also 100 spelling and grammer mistakes bc this is a rush job.

Word count: 2075 (Sorry, I can’t write drabbles for shit lmao)

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Growing up and turning into adults with such a big group of friends meant weekly linkups at your local bar had slowly turned into fortnight linkups, and that slowly turned into only a few people turning up, and everyone hanging out properly probably once a month.

Some were starting families like Stark, or already had a family like Barton. Others were slowly getting into relationships, and only a few of you were single.

It was weird being single and watching everyone else fall in love, grow families, considering that you guys had been friends since high school, or for some since pre-school. It was weird watching some of your friends get into relationships with one another, or with others. Seeing Peggy and Steves relationship grow was a beautiful one, she was one of the strongest women you knew, even in high school, no one ever messed with her. Along with Buck and the rest of you, no one dared to mess with Steve before he hit puberty and ended up towering over everyone, and even being the star athlete in senior year.

The same went for Tony, some thought he would never settle down, but his heart always belonged to one person. Vision and Wanda had only recently gotten together, it was weird because they flirted and had always been there for one another, they had an unspoken bond. You were just scared that soon you would have to find a new roommate. It was difficult when Natasha had left, but being just the two of you, you got buy, you had good jobs and rent was fine, but you knew it would be a difficult process.

Only a few of you were single now, both you and Bucky, although you would gladly change that any day. James Buchanan Barnes. A man you had fancied for years. He was too blind to see it of course. Not that you showed it. The two of you constantly fought, but also joked, if anything you saw him and Sam the most, probably because the three of you were the single ones. There was Peter, but he was a few years younger, and even he had a girl.

Meeting up with everyone on Friday after everyone had finished work was weird, you were sat with Sam and Buck, not everyone could make it, but of course the three of you were ready to turn up. Although you hated seeing playboy Bucky, although those years were long gone.

“You good?” Bucky asked nudging your shoulder,

You grimaced, “I’m fab Buck. But like… Love is stupid” you said looking around at the lovey dovey couples,

He chuckled and smiled across at you, “Ahhh, it’s not that bad” He said, “Look at all those rom coms you watch. You call it cute then”

“That’s because they are cute Buck, but now I want my friends” I whined, “But ok no, I want what they have” I said dropping the dumbest hints.

“I’m sure you’ll find someone soon, we just gotta make sure they’re good for you”

Bucky had a smirk on his face, “Don’t get all protective over me now Buck”

“Naww, I’m always protective over you” he said putting his arm around you and pulling you into his arms slightly, “You’re my best girl” He stated,

All you could do was smell his aftershave, over the years his smell had almost matured more and more, but it was sexy as hell. Whenever you stayed over at his and Sam’s place after a drunken night, you always ended up in one of Buckys hoodies, or tops, and the smell was just as intoxicating to you now as much as it is then.

“That’s sweet Buck, but it makes me feel like I’ll be single until I turn 35, after that, Sam and I made a pact when we were kids that if we’re both still single, that we’d just end up marrying one another”

Sam winked at me, “You got it, your present for your 35th birthday will be an engagement ring from yours truly”

Bucky tightened his grip around you, “Shame, Steve broke our pact like that. He’s got a girl and everything”

Steve overheard this and turned our way, “Still hurting over that huh, and to think, everyone thought you would’ve settled down first playboy”

“Still hurts that you left me like that Stevie”

Everyone laughed at that, but conversations carried on, Buckys arm had dropped down to your waist now instead, lingering there, although you acted like you couldn’t feel it, the whole time it’s all you could think about as it made your heart hammer in your chest.

Both Nat and Wanda had shared a glance before the both of them looking at you, Peggy also catching on quickly.

You rolled your eyes at how dramatic they were being but a smile still on your face, this happens often enough, the two of you don’t necessarily flirt, but you do, you want to believe there is chemistry there, the way he treats you, the way he plays with your hair, always makes sure you’ve eaten, makes sure you get home safely.

Everyone soon slowly started to disperse, Wanda told you that she would be staying the night with Vision which meant you had to walk back or grab a taxi to your place alone.

“I’ll walk you home” Bucky offered once Sam had managed to pull,

“I’ll be fine Buck” You smiled at him as you walked outside, the cold breeze hitting your face, making you realise how hot and stuffy that place can get,

“Like hell am I letting my girl wander around the city by herself at this time” He said putting his elbow out,

You intertwined your hand through his elbow, as the two of you started walking, “Tonight was nice, makes me miss everyone though” You mumbled leaning your head against his arm, you could feel his bicep, and you knew you would only be lucky to be wrapped up in this mans arms,

“Same, scary how everyone is starting families, and we’re just… here”

You chuckled at that, “Only a matter of time before Wan moved in with Vis”

“Yeah? Well whenever that happens, Steves room is still free” He grinned at you, “Then I’ll have my girl a lot closer” He always said this, always called you his girl but never acted on it. The only time he got close to acting on it was when you were being hit on by a random guy in the bar. He got possessive and attractively dangerous at certain times.

“Eugh, imagine living with boys full time” You joked trying to ignore the comments.

He let out a loud laugh, “Oh, trust me it’ll be a big difference than living with Wanda and Nat”

“I’ve stayed there and I know, and it’s mostly me here anyway, at the moment I’m enjoying my peace and quiet, but also missing the commotion”

“Don’t blame you, at least it’s not a bad set of apartments around here”

You lived in a nice neighbourhood, especially considering New York rates, but you had a very well paid job, no family responsibilities, and put in your savings just as much as you spent on rent. You were fine.

“They’re very nice” You murmured with a small shiver,

Bucky had noticed this and as soon as he did, he stopped, “Shit, sorry Y/N, I promise I was raised better than this” He said,

You stared at him confused, wondering why he stopped but he soon gave you his jacket, you were in awe at the fact that he gave you his jacket,

“Bucky” You pouted, “Thank you” You wrapped yourself in his jacket, the smell of his cologne stronger than before, but so much warmer.

“Anything for you sugar, besides you look better in it than I do, I like you wearing my stuff” He murmured kissing your forehead,

The two of you carried on walking, mostly in silence, it was nice though. Times like this with Bucky meant the world to you.

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours” He asked when you were only a block away from your apartment building,

You shook your head, “I just… like this” You said, “Spending time with you, it’s nice”

He smiled at that, his pearly whites on show, and his beautiful blue eyes twinkling, “I knew I was better company than Wilson”

You laughed at that, “I’m being serious Buck, you just… I don’t know. You make me feel safe and happy, even at 1am walking through the streets of New York”

“Good, because I’m always here to keep you safe” He said,

You stared up at him, so often, when he made comments like that it made you think, does he feel the way you do. Does he want to be with you as much as you want to be with him?

“You’ve got a dangerous look on your face there sugar.”

“No I don’t buck” you whispered before going into your apartment building, nodding at the doorman who also smiled at Buck,

“Yes you do” he said following you into the lift,

You couldn’t help but raise your eyebrows at him and crossing your arms across your chest, he always made fun of you for this but you couldn’t help it,

He tried to supress his smirk, “You look cute sugar, and what was that dangerous look for huh?”

It was just the two of you in the elevator, you didn’t expect him to come up with you,

“I don’t know Buck… like sometimes, sometimes you just make some comments or act a certain way and it makes me overthink. It’s stupid”

He didn’t say anything, instead he had an intense look on his face, his thinking face, although rarely was he this deep in thought, the elevator stopped on your floor and the two of you walked across the landing towards your door, he still hadn’t said anything as the two of you entered your apartment, you kicked your shoes off, and didn’t take Bucks Jacket off until you got to your room, Bucky Still following you.

He stared at your intently, “Don’t look at me like that” you grumbled taking his jacket off, missing the warmth it had and his smell and hanging it back to him, he threw the jacket on the bed before coming up to you, he seemed so much taller right now since you took your heels off, he brushed a strand of hair out of your face, still giving you the same look,

“You know, these last few years, I was hoping at some point you would realise why I’ve scared off any guy who comes near you. Why I’ve always been there to look out for you, making sure my fav girl knows she’s my only girl. But you just… you don’t see it. But I think you do. I know you do” He voice was so deep and low, turning you on slightly, he had a dark look in his eyes, but his blue eyes still piercing into you,

“Maybe youre the one whos not caught on Buck, come on, I’ve not cared about any other guy for years, especially when youre the only guy I can see” You whispered at him,

That’s all the conformation he needed before pinning you up against your bedroom door, you gasped at the strength and speed he had, a hand caressing your jaw slowly, before he pressed his lips against your own, you moaned at this he kept you pinned against the door. The kiss was rough but held all the passion your needed, he grabbed your wandering hands before holding them above your head in one place with one of his hands, the other grabbing your hip, pressing himself up against you, the kiss soon turned into kisses down your neck as he bit and sucked his way down,

“Buck” You moaned out feeling a small wetness between your thighs, shocked at the sudden pleasure, if you knew your body would react like this, you would’ve said something sooner, the pleasure this made caused you within seconds was more than any man had done before.

“You’re mine Y/N” He growled out, “You’re mine, and I’m going to make sure it takes more than just my cologne all over you for you to know that” He said before picking you up and throwing you on your bed before joining you.

The two of you making love in ways you didnt expect with him, not realising he felt the way you did, and him giving you want you wanted, no needed.

A/N: Lol I’m so sorryyyy I’m trying to write more and moreeee. Hope you enjoy though, any requests send them my wayyyyyy

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mikwrites-archive · 4 years

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♖ afflatus, /əˈflādəs/ a divine creative impulse or inspiration.

♖ pairing: xu minghao x reader (painter x royal au) ♖ warnings: hella long oops ♖ wc: 5k words

♖ a/n: new fandom to write for, new record of a word count, who am i damn HWJBJDSFHS anyways i hope u guys like this pls lmk what u think bc im kinda nervous HAHAH

You’d grown up with a penchant for pretty things.

Your gaze of innocent youth widening with wonder at your mother’s glittering jewels, your father’s heavy crown, laughing at the splashing fountains across the vast gardens that spewed crystalline water amongst shimmering koi.

Yet with age, the gilded champagne tinted chandeliers, flowing gowns of all pale and deep hues, and all the other little beauteous wonders thrust at you across the years whether you desired them or not, became dull.

The listening to melodies became the study of notes and aching of fingertips, the joy of dancing became tight shoes and even stiffer, polite movements; every little action and hobby seemed to soon become a task of royalty.

“Who made that?”

It’s not any style you recognize, with furrowed eyebrows you study the art hanging on Lord Jun’s wall in his quarters, almost as a habit of your studies.

You’re parsing through the list of painters in your mind that you’d been forced to memorize the previous week, as Jun laughs.

“I didn’t know you were interested in art, your highness.”

You shoot him a glare, and he fails to hide his grin as he stuffs his garments into his luggage. While Jun was a lord of your father’s council, your close ages allowed you both to maintain a close friendship, and he knew most of your recent complaints with sympathy.

He was currently packing for an ambassador trip back at his home kingdom, and you were attempting to dispel the simmering disappointment at your closest friend leaving for even just a few weeks.

“A friend painted it for me. Do you like it?”

“It’s pretty.”

And for once, you mean it.

“You’ll meet him soon enough I believe. Your mother has been wanting an artist on grounds for family portraits and I recommended him.”

“What’s his name?” You squint, the squiggle of signature in the corner incomprehensible to you.

“Xu Minghao.” Jun answers.

“He’s not from here?”

Jun hums, casting you a glance, noting how you’ve yet to take your eyes off the painting.

“I think you’ll take a liking to him.”

Jun’s letter is like a piece of home to Minghao, the script messier than his own, but in the familiar tongue that Minghao whispers to himself softly as the tide laps at his feet.

He knows his decision before he even reaches the end of the parchment, but reads through anyways, and folds it neatly back into his pocket. Heavy, umber eyes watch the rolling waves for a few more moments, chipping absently away at the dried paint on the tips of his slender fingers, before making his way back to the tiny house a little ways away with his hollow knocking heart.

Minghao packs his belongings the early morning of his departure, not looking back once at the shabby house he’d spent the past few months in as he canters away on his black mare, eyes set on the salt spraying sea he was really leaving behind instead.

He wonders if palace gardens were a satisfying alternative.

The idea of stable housing and food was enough to satiate his artistic nitpicking for the time being, and Minghao makes a silent promise to return to the sea one day.

Minghao is introduced to you a day after he arrives and the day Jun leaves.

Wind strewn dark hair grown past his ears, worn leather vest, paint flecked billowing sleeves of eggshell white, black loose pants, and scuffed shoes. He’s the opposite of your delicate satin gown, immaculately styled curls, and dainty accessories, but you feel as if you’re the one out of place as you observe him, both of you waiting for Jun in the courtyard, finishing his farewell to your parents.

He’s quiet, long features often solemn, sometimes slipping upwards in a small smile at the littlest of things or out of politeness.

You’re about to attempt to start conversation to fill the silence, but another voice cuts in.

“I hope you’ll behave while I’m gone.” Jun grins at you, appearing from the large doors with your parents in tow, shining brightly under the beaming sunlight, and you snort, relieved.

“I should be the one telling you that. God knows what you’d do without me.”

“Rejoice, of course.”

Your retort is muffled as he gathers you in an embrace, which you return just as strongly.

“I’ll write as soon as I settle.” He promises, and you only nod as you watch him move to Minghao, absently listening to the soft Mandarin they used to converse.

“Watch over her, yeah?”

“Me?” Minghao blinks, the surprise etched on his features comical to Jun who laughs. Jun knows you well enough that your curiosity would eventually overtake your tiptoeing around Minghao, but for the artist, while loneliness wasn’t ideal, he’d endure it no matter how much it gnawed at him.

“And yourself as well. You both need more friends. You can’t always be alone.”

The words settle forlornly in the pit of Minghao’s stomach as Jun draws him in, patting him on the back before he clambers upon the saddle, waving one last time before setting off.

Your mother suggests then that you provide a tour for Minghao before he begins his work the next day, claiming it as practice for future diplomatic encounters, and you almost miss his curiously amused glint in his eyes as you murmur a quiet agreement, beckoning him to follow you once you Jun becomes a tiny speck in the distance of your squinted vision.

The royal gardens do not disappoint as the last destination, almost exceeding Jun’s scrawling description within his letter, Minghao realizes with satisfaction.

The soft hum of fat bumblebees puttering across the extensive variety of blooms that were maintained to their fullest in neat order, along with the trickling ponds and fountains you could hear if you honed in just enough by the glade of willow trees where you decided to end the tour.

Minghao settles down on one of the bumpy roots, closing his eyes as he rests his hand on the cool bark, the other twirling the blades of grass by his thigh.

You’ve convinced yourself he’s fallen asleep, breaths rising slowly as his movements cease, but suddenly his eyes open, meeting yours, and you flush as if you’d been caught in the wrong.

“Would you like to meet here tomorrow morning to begin the portrait?”

You can only stammer a hasty agreement, and the lanky boy stands, gazing up at the filtered sunlight between the leaves with slightly squinted eyes.

“I would say you could return to your daily activities, but if I’m honest, I don’t remember how to return to the palace.” He admits after a moment, and you duck your head to hide your smile, but he catches it with one of his own.

Heavy is the head that wears the crown.

While you’re sure there’s a deeper meaning, the head piece currently sitting upon your tightly styled hair, was indeed weighty, and didn’t assist your focus of maintaining a still, straight posture.

“You fidget a lot. Your highness.” Minghao adds on respectfully after a beat, and you immediately cease your movements, smiling sheepishly.

“My apologies. I’ve never liked getting my portrait done. When I was younger I remember they always had to promise me my favourite sweet afterwards.”

“I’ll try to finish as quickly as I can then.” He grins wryly. “Or perhaps I can request the cook to make something specific for tonight’s dessert.”

You fail to hold in your shaking laughs, but Minghao doesn’t mind.

Minghao doesn’t see you often after he completes the portrait.

It seems to be an occurrence for most around the palace, the few acquaintances Minghao made telling him it was common now for you to be holed up in a study, while you used to constantly tag around the kitchens, amble around the stables, and meander the gardens. He’s slightly disappointed in your lack of appearance, but fills his time with roaming around the palace grounds himself and satisfying his artistic needs.

He meets you again by accident (or fate), as he brushes aside the curtain of flowers that concealed a small space he’d discovered yesterday, perfect for peaceful painting.

The air is charged with awkward stumbling as Minghao fumbles with his armload of supplies and you bolt up from your relaxed position, but you’re quick to react, snapping your book shut lightly.

“I’ll leave you to work. I’m sure your artistry requires more of the space than I do.”

“Please, stay.”

You’re convinced that he’s only insisting you stay out of courtesy, but you know he’s one to not say something he doesn’t mean, so you settle back down, skirt pooling under you, lace hem fluttering like your heart.

“How are you liking the kingdom so far?” You prompt as he sets up his palette, and Minghao shrugs, flicking a few stray strands of hair impatiently from his eyes. It leaves a smudge of paint on his forehead, and you smile in the secrecy of your pages.

“It’s not home, but it’s pleasant.”

“Will you tell me about your home?”

Home.

The word pangs in Minghao’s chest like an empty echo in a gaping chasm, but he obliges, hoping to fill it with his memories, recalling the sound of rain outside his window, the croaking of frogs at night, and the aroma of his mother’s cooking.

You listen carefully, closing your eyes as you do, inhaling slowly the scent of honeysuckle, lulling you to peaceful bliss. Minghao’s voice is calming, lilting and gentle, and eventually fades out of your consciousness.

He’s not sure how long it is that he’s been speaking while you’ve slept, surprising even himself as he usually prefers painting in peace, but the pale array of buds on the stretched canvas bloomed with a sleeping form as the sun slowly begins to switch places with the moon.

Time is unrivaled as Minghao loses himself to the simple intricacies of his art, until a messenger arrives.

“Your highness.” The address comes with a gentle shake to your shoulder, and you rise slowly, rubbing your eyes drowsily.

“What happened?”

“You've been called for dinner.” Minghao explains. “You fell asleep in the garden.”

“My apologies,” you bow your head lightly, regret washing over you as you notice the orange tinged sky, a contrast to the baby blue of when you last recalled consciousness. “I hope I didn’t waste your entire day waiting upon me.”

Minghao thinks of the piece behind him, palms dusted with the colour of your chiffon gown, and shakes his head.

“I didn’t.”

Minghao almost falls asleep amidst the bustle of ballgowns and coattails, the lilting laughter and flirty chatter tuned out, an imprinted mark left on his face as he starts at a tap on his shoulder.

“Won’t you dance?”

Your voice is sweet and quizzical, and he shakes his head timidly, an expression you had used to mistake for solemness, and you sigh.

“Why not? It’s fairly easy.”

“I don’t dance.”

It’s a blatant lie, and Minghao knows you see through it, his guilty eyes flicking away from your gaze hurriedly as he utters it. As you hold your hand out knowingly, Minghao grudgingly takes it, letting himself be pulled onto the floor where other pairs flocked like seagulls.

Faint crescents of colour are under his neatly trimmed nails, calloused palms a contrast to the gentle grip of his hands.

Minghao hopes you don’t notice the way they shake slightly.

The music starts, and he stumbles in the sudden rapidity of the orchestra, and you bite the inside of your cheek to stifle your giggles, which he notices with narrowed eyes. It’s almost forgotten as you’re immersed within the dance, reminding Minghao of the sea, of home, and the thrumming of his heart.

“You said you didn’t dance.” You accuse breathlessly as the music fades and you’re both upon the sidelines once more, and Minghao blinks.

“You said it would be easy.” He retorts, and you grin cheekily.

“Forgive me, I suspected you weren’t entirely speaking the truth. Especially considering Jun told me a bit about your skills upon mentioning the ball to him in his last correspondence.”

“Of course.” Minghao purses his lips, hiding a smile as he tugs at his collar, fanning himself lightly.

“Do you want to go for a walk?” You’re already making your way to the exit, and Minghao finds himself following subconsciously.

“Now?” He blinks, and you nod.

“No one will notice, if only for a few moments to cool down. It does get fairly stuffy at events such as these.”

As if sensing his hesitancy with his darting glances around the ballroom, you grab his arm, a glowing flush on your features as you tug him along. He excuses his own blush creeping up his neck upon the crowd, dispelled sharply when you both meet the crisp night air.

“I didn’t take you for a worrier, Xu Minghao.” You grin as you prop yourself up easily on the short garden wall, implying to Minghao that you’ve done this before.

“I didn’t know your highness was such a rebelliously improper figure.”

He hops up next to you with a smile as you laugh, trickling off to a content sigh that puffs out wispily, hanging in the air before dissipating. Legs are kicked lightly, childishly, heels thumping against the wall, filling the comfortable silence.

“We should go inside, your highness.” Minghao notices with a murmur, but he makes no move himself, entranced with the way the pale moonlight filters itself across your upturned features. His fingers itch for his paints, to resolve the artistic ache within his chest at this scene, but instead he resorts to memorizing every little detail in breathlessness. “You’re shivering.”

“Just a little longer.”

He’s in no position to argue, but his fingers twitch at the hem of his coat, battling with whether it is appropriate to shrug it off and drape it upon your shoulders, but before he can make the decision, you turn with a satisfied smile upon your lips.

“Shall we have another dance?”

Minghao convinces himself it’s the bubbling champagne that tells him to agree, and for once since arriving, he feels his heart’s solid rhythm.

When you don’t make an appearance within the gardens for the first day since the ball, Minghao tells himself he isn’t fazed. He blames the frustration of his art upon the fact that he’s not entirely used to sketching, crumpled parchment littering the grass.

Yet as the second and third day toiled by, the wilting pink camellias in the heat are all that Minghao can depict, and he takes it as a sign, gathering up some supplies hastily in a coarse bag before roaming the palace.

He has to ask for directions in some areas, but eventually reaches where he wants to be.

You don’t hear the argued exclamations outside your chambers, but when your door cracks open, you struggle from under your bundle of blankets to sit up.

“I thought you would be bored and brought you some things to do.”

“How did you get inside? I thought I told Chan to not let anyone in.” You frown hoarsely, and Minghao grins.

“I convinced him to let me have five minutes.”

“The poor boy.” You laugh, trickling into a fit of coughs, and Minghao rushes awkwardly to the water pitcher at your bedside table, but you wave him off, pouring it yourself.

“What did you bring?” You inquire curiously as you sip your water, straining your neck to watch him slip out brushes, thick parchment, a palette with circles of varying colours, along with a few books.

“I hope this is alright.” He places them all on your mattress in methodicalness, and you immediately examine them all.

“Thank you.”

He opens his mouth to utter something, but the door bursts open with Chan in tow, and he leaves you with a dry grin and a slight bow.

The watercolour blooms through the paper with every touch of the thin bristles across your page as you amuse yourself, and that morning, Minghao finds solace in the freshly bloomed tulips that were speckled with dew-like tears.

The corridor your room lies within seems to draw Minghao towards it, even when his desired destination is far from the route.

This caused Minghao to form a friendly relationship with your personal guard, Chan, who often updated him upon your status during your sickness.

“Could you take my place for a few moments while I run to the kitchens?” Chan pleads the second Minghao appears one morning. “Soonyoung told me that Mingyu baked, and I’m sure the princess wouldn’t mind if it was you.”

Minghao doesn’t have the time to confirm or deny the young guard before he rushes off eagerly, and while he’d normally be annoyed, he’d been meaning to ask you a question anyways.

“Your highness?” Minghao tiptoes tentatively after his knock on the door receives no answer, and ventures further in.

He’s honestly not entirely sure what occurred, perhaps he bumped his head on his stumbling out of your chambers, but his cheeks are hot as he leans against the door to catch his breath, bidding the glances at your bare skin away.

“What’s wrong?” Chan has crumbs speckling his chin as he tilts his head at Minghao, curiously innocent, with a pastry in his hand as he returns to his post.

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

Your door cracks open with you fully clothed much to his relief, saving Minghao from Chan’s oncoming suspicious questioning as you beckon to him.

“Would you like to come in?”

You both settle down on the small sofa by your window, and Minghao shuffles awkwardly.

“Chan told me you were feeling better.”

“I am.” You smile, propping your chin on the heel of your palms as silence ensues for a beat. “I suppose I have to thank Chan for his responsibility in our wedding now.”

“What?” Minghao sputters, a few seconds too late to the processing of your words.

“Didn’t you know?” Minghao’s stomach roils. “If anyone other than family sees a royal indecently it’s considered taboo if they’re not immediately married.”

He catches the twitch of your lips after surveying your expression carefully for a few moments, and groans, posture sagging.

“That’s not funny.”

“Oh, but it is.” You insist with a boisterous laugh, and he can’t help but grin at the sound. When you calm down, swiping giddy tears away from your eyes, you tilt your head at him.

“Did you only want to find me because I was feeling better?”

“I actually wanted to ask you something.”

Your inquisitive gaze encourages him to continue, and he picks at the end of his thumb nail timidly.

“May I paint you again?”

He refuses to let you see the progress of the portrait.

It’s a breezy afternoon when you give up your pestering, Minghao warning that he’d leave it unfinished. While you know he never would, you silence your curiosity temporarily, biting your tongue as Minghao smirks.

“The wind keeps moving your hair.” He huffs, partly to himself. “May I?” Minghao gestures lightly towards your hair with a questioning raise of his eyebrows and you nod your consent.

You try not to shiver as he brushes aimless strands back into their place, adjusting your shoulders and angle of your chin with feather light touches. It’s no use, at least for your hair, the wind deviating it constantly.

“Perhaps we should continue another day, when the weather is more forgiving.” He muses, pads of his fingertips lightly twirling stray strands once more before falling to his side before returning to pack up his easel.

Your voice seems to be caught in his pigment streaked palms, but when he smiles at you boyishly, you know he understands.

Neither of you show it until the painting is finished, and Minghao thinks there’s something beautiful about the way it ties you both together.

“Your highness, your mother requests your presence in the study hall.”

“Thank you Seokmin.” You smile at the messenger, who beams back as you attempt to not shift. “We’re almost finished, I’ll be there shortly.”

He scurries off, peeking at the painting with wide eyes, and your mind races at the imaginings of the completed piece.

“Would you like to see?” Minghao finally sets down his brush, glancing at you as he runs a hand through his hair amusedly, stepping back. Eagerly, you amble up to Minghao’s side, shoulder brushing against his as you peer at the canvas with wide eyes.

“It’s beautiful.”

“My place here is to simply paint what I see.” Minghao distracts himself from your gaze, bending down to pick up a fallen flower at his feet. When he rises, his eyes finally meet yours, and neither of you can help leaning forwards.

The kiss is delicate and sweet, lips like crushing silk petals against yours, as sweet as nectar, intoxicating your senses and making your head spin.

“I have to leave.” You murmur, pulling away reluctantly.

His smile is devastating, you think, gentle and adoring, his thumb brushing against your jaw; you know in that moment that you’ve lost a part of yourself to him, given as freely as the soft breeze in the arching branches above, holding you both in a secret lover’s haven.

“Go.” He nods, and a part of you wishes he’d told you the opposite, but you both know the impossibility of asking that. As if he can sense your hesitancy, his fingers fall, moving to clasp your hands lightly. “I’ll still be here when you’re finished.”

“You swear it?”

This draws out a chuckle, and while you realize it’s a foolish inquiry, when he tucks the gardenia bloom behind your ear affectionately, you want to hide there with him until the tides stopped and the sun’s flames flickered out of existence; until the impossible became a common ideal.

“I swear.”

You rush off after hearing his promise, resisting the urge to kiss him again, knowing you’d be held later if you were any more tardy to your lessons, out of breath by the time you reach the hall.

“You’ve got a smudge on your face.” Your mother huffs, reaching out to swipe at it with her thumb, but you dodge it, glancing in the mirror, gently touching the streaks of colour with a fond smile, as if you were touching the fingertips that left them.

Your heart seems to thrum freely out of your chest around Minghao.

Whether it’s the sound of his soft laughter, the focused expression he adorns as he immerses himself within his art, or the fact that thinking about, speaking to, or kissing him seems to make you late for almost everything.

“Is there a fire?”

The corner of Minghao’s lips quirks up amusedly as you stumble backwards from colliding with him in the corridor, adjusting your skirt hurriedly as he steadies you with firm hands.

“Minghao.” You drop a quick curtsy, and he bows in return, albeit confused as you brush past him, borderline running down the plush carpet.

“Should I be running too?” He shouts after you, ignoring the stares he gained in the corridor.

“I’m just late for my lessons!” You call out with a laugh, turning back, and Minghao giggles as you bump into Seungkwan, who almost topples over, causing more apologetic fussing from you.

He darts after you after a pause of thinking, and it’s not difficult for him to catch up, the surprise on your expression a contrast to his gleeful one as he grabs your hand, making you halt, tugging you close.

“Minghao, someone could see-”

He pays no attention to your paranoia, knowing as well as you did that the study hall was kept empty for the sake of your focus, cupping your face warmly as he met your lips breathlessly.

“I’ll see you after?”

You believe sometimes that you have him pieced together, until he shakes the puzzle board with a cheeky grin.

Minghao doesn’t remember the throne room being this intimidating. The thrones seemed to tower over his head, banners and artworks of historical wars and ancestors adorning the walls, all scrutinizing him.

He feels small, a scurrying insect to be crushed under the heavy boot of societal status. You’d both known that the time to reveal your relationship to your parents was better to come sooner than later and from your own mouths, but in the situation itself, Minghao feels uneasy.

“You know of his nature in his time here.” You argue persistently, and your parents are silent, the epitome of stoic rulers, and Minghao is almost afraid. “He is kind, and has treated me with nothing but respect and love-”

“What will the people say when it's revealed you’ve chosen a foreign commoner to be your husband?” Your father interjects, and this only stokes the passionate fire in your eyes, while simultaneously making Minghao flinch at the searing heat in the words.

“HIs talents will take him far. He won’t be just a commoner soon enough. I know you know this-”

He clambers to his feet suddenly, startling everyone, who seemed to have forgotten his presence despite him being the topic of discussion.

“Pardon my interruption.” He bows stiffly. “But if I may offer a suggestion?”

Minghao takes the silence as agreement, and barrels on hurriedly.

“I would like to request leave from my work here, to travel amongst kingdoms with my art. I’ll return a known man, and I’ll be worthy of your daughter’s hand, if you’ll have me.”

“That could take years.” Your mother blinks, and Minghao’s reply is quiet.

“Yes.”

“You expect us to wait for something that might not even happen?” Your father raises an eyebrow.

“Father-” you stand abruptly next to him, and Minghao grips your hand. You silence, looking at him incredulously.

“May I ask how long you would be willing to wait?”

Your mother murmurs something to your father, who contemplates before answering, and the words overturn the trickling hourglass of your fates.

“Two summers from now.”

You don’t speak to him until the next day, when he leaves.

He doesn’t hold any grudge against your actions, but as the dawning sun peeks over the horizon, the reins of his mare tightly gripped in his hands, the tightness in his throat is only relieved by your appearance in the wispy dewed morning.

“I’m sorry.” You breathe as you approach him, and something inside him aches at the melancholy in your eyes as he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear.

“What for?” He whispers softly, thumb stroking your cheekbone tenderly.

“I wanted to see you before this. But I couldn’t. And now we only have a few spare minutes.”

“We’ll have all the time in the world when I return.” He murmurs, and you know he means it, yet the sincerity in his eyes couldn’t ever explain the way he would move the hands of time himself and mould the world to your own desires if you simply asked.

“My heart has belonged to you since that day you convinced me to stay.” You confess quietly, and Minghao listens intently. “Call me foolish for it’s easily swayed nature, I know I have, but it’s true.” Your voice doesn’t waver, it’s firm, and you’re staring at him with intensity, but he can see the fragility of your words. “I only ask that you be gentle with it.”

His hands fit loosely with yours, cupping them in his palms gently as he kneels, bringing them to his lips, bowing his head slightly, resembling the swaying bluebells at his back.

“I wouldn’t tend to it in any other manner.”

Jun returns soon after Minghao leaves, when the leaves tint with orange and scarlet, and your fingertips are always cold no matter how deep you delve them into your sleeves.

“I crossed paths briefly with Minghao on my way back.” He muses, hands cupping a steaming mug as he kicks lightly at the littered leaves on the ground.

“How is he?”

“Good.” Jun smiles reassuringly at your troubled gaze. “He’s working hard.”

“He hasn’t written to me lately.” You sigh, tracing the rim of your cup lightly, the scent of cinnamon apple wafting up from the ceramic. “And I don’t wish to bother him with my own letters.”

“He just doesn’t want you to worry.” His voice trails off quietly, almost commenting to himself. “I think he knows the most out of us that this is not all guaranteed.”

The icy wind nips at you, settling in your bones, and you both decide to go inside silently.

All to keep you company when springtide returned was creased parchment, each having worn edges from the amount of times you’d reread them, fingertips tracing the flowing ink.

Jun had departed once more in the winter, and while Minghao sent letters whenever he could, he divulged no time to when he would return.

It’s not until the weather warms, and the sunsets are softer, that you get your answer.

“Lord Jun has arrived. And he’s brought Xu Minghao.” Seokmin breathes, bursting into the study room and it’s not missed how you go rigid, fingers twitching to push back your chair before pausing.

“Go.” Your mother waves her hand amusedly, and you scramble from the table, maneuvering your skirt impatiently in bunched fists, striding steps racing towards Jun’s quarters.

“He made his way to the garden.” Jun smirks, and you think it’s entirely typical for Minghao to make you run around like this as you catch your breath in the doorway.

“How was your trip?” You breathe in an attempt to fill the silence politely as Jun unpacks his belongings.

“Do you care?”

It’s an amused jest, but well aimed, and you snort truthfully.

“At the particular moment, no, but-”

“Go.” Jun cuts in, laughing. “You’ve waited long enough.”

The words don’t fail to bring a giddy beam upon your features as you heed his words, and Jun thinks he’s never seen you this illuminated, with a fond heart.

You find Minghao by the white rosebuds, and you can’t help stop and admire the way his upturned features glow under the pale blue sky, as if he never left, a heavenly image.

“Xu Minghao.”

He looks at you, eyes fluttering open, and he tries to hide back a smile, pursing his lips as you step towards him.

His touch is as gentle as you remember, kisses as warm and honeyed, and you almost weep when his thumb runs along your cheekbone tenderly.

“I have something to show you.” He brightens, one hand drifting to the covered canvas at his shoes, the other gripping your own gently.

“I went back to the sea before I came back to you.” Minghao explains, carefully undraping the sheet, and you can only gaze at the revealed painting with wide eyes. It was you, sitting amidst the lapping waves that only seemed to get more turbulent as they strayed farther from your grasp, as if you were ruler of the seas. “I remember before I came here, the sea was the only thing that gave me comfort away from my home. But when I went back, I couldn’t stop thinking about you, with me there, the hard work that I endured to get here to you, and the sea suddenly was cold and unfamiliar.”

“I love you.” He professes simply after a heartbeat, and he shushes you fondly when you sniffle, and all you can do is thump his chest lightly with your fist. He laughs aloud, as you say it back, once, twice, bright and beautiful, and you join him, swaying in one another’s embrace, with all the time the universe could offer.

♖ tags: @writeiolite

#seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #minghao x reader #minghao imagines #xu minghao x reader #xu minghao imagines #the8 imagines #the8 x reader #myungho imagines #svt imagines #svt x reader #I HOPE IM NOT MISSING PARTS THATD BE SO EMBARRASSING WHJSBDJFSH

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magicofthepen · 3 years

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For the character thingy, romana and leela?? ❤

ROMANA - I’m going to answer for Romana I, since I already did Romana II!

favorite thing about them: so I fell in love with Romana I instantly when I watched The Ribos Operation. I was like “wait no one told me that Romana’s basically a recent graduate who always thrived in school but has now suddenly been thrust into the Real World and is a bit of a mess” and oh my god why is she so relatable, also I love that about her. I love that she doesn’t quite know what she’s doing, and her academic brilliance doesn’t necessarily help in the situations she’s finding herself in, but she keeps trying and learning, so by the end of season 16 she’s much more confident and capable on her own than she was when she started. I just absolutely adore the premise of her character and how she develops during the key to time quest. also her banter skills are so excellent. (….this wasn’t one thing whoops. 😄)

least favorite thing about them: I feel like it’s something about how she’s portrayed in the Gallifrey audios, but I can’t quite articulate what? but I feel like somehow, some of the things I really liked about her on TV (her witty fun banter, her determination even when she’s out of her depth) aren’t represented as much when we get glimpses of Actual Romana I (not Pandora or an alternate universe version). idk if this is even fully true, it’s just….she doesn’t quite have the same vibe as the character I remember from the TV show (but this is also tricky because the Lies scene, the Matrix projection in Lies (which *isn’t* really her technically) and the remains of her consciousness in the body that Pandora’s using are the only times we get Actual Romana I - which isn’t that much time to express all the nuances of her character.)

(continuing to skip the favorite line question because it’s too hard)

brOTP: her and the Doctor!! (like I said in the Romana II ask, I used to ship them more, but lately I’ve been more into a platonic interpretation.) I just as instantly fell for their dynamic in the Ribos Operation - two people with very different personalities who don’t get along but are forced to work together and gradually become friends?? this is exactly the kind of relationship arc that I adore. Their banter and snark is So Good (I was so entertained by their interactions in Ribos Operation that my brain refused to pay attention to anything but their scenes, and I ended up having issues following the plot later oops). And I love their growing respect and care for each other - how they go from being mutually dismissive of each other to valuing each other and being a solid Team and just really genuinely liking each other! their friendship is just Very Good (…..and now I really want to rewatch season 16….I’ve only seen it like one and a half times but I loved it very much….)

OTP: I don’t think I have any ships with Romana I that I would consider an ‘otp’? (the closest would be her and the Doctor since I have sometimes shipped them and I adore their relationship in general)

nOTP: Brax/Romana again….and tbh with Romana I it’s more of an actual nOTP (rather than ‘kinda nOTP, kinda ‘it’s complicated’’) because this is the time frame when she’s actually his student and so my discomfort with student/teacher relationships really rears its head (although there’s still one fic out there that I just think is so well-written.....but it does show the relationship as very unhealthy).

random headcanon: .....so sorry to continue Sartia posting, but oops the first thing that popped into my head is my new maybe-unrealistic headcanon that Sartia was Romana’s first kiss. in a teenage “I’m curious and want to try this thing and you’re the only person I hang out with, but it doesn’t mean anything....or does it??” way. (.....this is so self-indulgent in such a terrible way rip.)

unpopular opinion: Armageddon Factor is my favorite Key to Time story! (I gather this is an unpopular opinion in Doctor Who Fandom At Large, it doesn’t seem to be liked as much as some of the earlier stories in the season.) technically I’ve only seen it once and it was a couple years ago, but I remember loving it as a Romana story, there were a lot of really interesting character bits for her!

song i associate with them: hmm I don’t really have one? my Romana playlist is specifically for Romana II in Big Finish so....yeah.

favorite picture of them: anything with her Ribos Operation outfit (with the full cloak), it’s iconic and beautiful! on a similar note, I love this Romana I art by @volucris-liga, it’s the first Romana fanart I ever reblogged and it’s so pretty!

more under the cut!

LEELA

favorite thing about them: her resilience and her kindness. Leela goes through so much grief and pain, she has her world upended again and again, she never really finds a place where she belongs. and yet she still keeps choosing to love, choosing to keep fighting for what she believes in, choosing to rebuild again and again. and sometimes it’s really hard and she doesn’t want to go on….but she does, and she finds moments of happiness again. and that strength is really powerful. and no matter how cruel the universe (and other people) are to her, she is still relentlessly kind - she listens, she protects, she wants to help, she cares.

least favorite thing about them: I mean, the “savage” stereotype that her character references is a racist/anti-indigenous trope (especially the whole dynamic of the Doctor trying to “civilize” her ugh). and I hate that characters keep calling her “savage” (even when they’re the Bad Guys, it’s still bringing up this trope again and again, and it’s even worse when it’s the Good Guys). why are they still doing this.

brOTP: see all characters listed under otp, every relationship that I ship is also an incredibly important friendship in Leela’s life and I love all of them <33 as far as relationships that I see as entirely non-romantic….I really love the version of Leela and Ace’s relationship that exists in my head (and in fandom) - they didn’t get to interact enough in the audios, but I absolutely think they were really close, because of their shared experiences and the ways their personalities mesh. (I feel like I should also say the Doctor here, but tbh I don’t remember her TV stories that well, so I don’t really have a solid memory of what their relationship was like.) and of course, Leela’s parental relationship with Rayo is very important to me!

OTP: once again, ot3 my beloved <33 and Leela/Romana first and foremost (I already rambled about them here, so I’m just going to second everything I said earlier).

and I also ship Leela/Narvin, although I’m not quite as invested in that pairing? (due to a combination of ‘Romana is my favorite character and so I’m just more interested in her relationships with other characters,’ ‘I joined the fandom when things were pretty much all Leela/Narvin all the time (I say with great respect and affection for the artists and writers putting out amazing content for that ship) so I was motivated to write fic primarily for R/L and N/R to balance out the ot3 content,’ ‘apparently I have a contrary streak with Gallifrey and the more the writers push a romantic interpretation of a relationship, the less interested I am in actually shipping it,’ and ‘I’m not really into Leela/Narvin as a pairing on its own - although I do love a lot of fic that portrays them that way bc it’s just very well-written.’) But just. how they form a grudging alliance for Romana’s sake and then develop genuine respect for each other and then build this really solid foundation of teamwork and fondness and care and really relax and feel comfortable around each other….the way they become ride-or-die for each other and just trust and love each other so much….it’s Very Good!! (And I did love writing scenes with the two of them in Call It Home - I might not focus on them, but I do genuinely love their relationship.)

And of course Leela/Veega <33….I debated if they even interacted enough in the actual audios for me to consider it an otp, but I love the idea of their relationship and the story of them in my head so much?? going to link to this post because it really captures my feelings about them - they’ve both been through so much grief and pain by the time they meet, they’ve both lost people they love before, so the idea of them choosing to love each other and build something together against the odds is just. very powerful. plus I have a whole playlist for the family they’ve built together, which is a strong indication that I really love this ship. 😊

nOTP: Leela/Andred. last time I answered an ask meme about Leela, I had this complicated response about how I hated Leela/Andred when I watched Invasion of Time (bc it’s so abrupt and arbitrary), and then Louise Jameson’s voice acting Convinced Me To Care because oh she really did love him....alas i am a Leela/Andred detractor at heart, and I have been nudged back to my default state by re-listening….I simply hate how he treats Leela in Gallifrey.

random headcanon: I really like the idea of Leela being more politically involved in her own right after they all return from the Axis. She’s just spent a lot of time leading a group of people who don’t have a voice in the government, fighting for their rights against the established injustices of Gallifreyan society. I don’t think she’d easily slip back into only being Romana’s bodyguard after experiencing more political autonomy on the other Gallifrey. What exactly this looks like in practice I’m not sure about - in my one fic ‘verse, I wrote about her being more directly involved with the Academy as a political liaison and guest tutor, and also advocating to Romana for policies that would benefit those who live outside the city on their home Gallifrey. but there’s probably a lot of options to explore here!

unpopular opinion: hmm I don’t think this is necessarily unpopular but idk and I want to talk about it: even though Leela identifies so strongly as a warrior, a “happy ending” for her would, I think, need to involve getting away from fighting. too often she throws herself into a fight to try to avoid thinking about how much she’s hurting, and it doesn’t work, it doesn’t stop the pain. and in the Time War, she’s tied her identity so strongly to war (it’s inevitable, inescapable, and she will Fight and Defend because that’s all she has left). there’s a difference between “I am a warrior” and “all I am is a warrior,” and Leela’s slid too far into the second one, and she needs to untangle her own identity from war to heal.

song i associate with them: Freedom by Karmina (it’s a song about going on defiantly in the face of heartbreak - “Tearing my room apart, I’m starting over” / “Take my pride I can still survive I’ve got my freedom” / “Hunt me down you’ll never find me now that I’ve got my freedom”)

favorite picture of them: the first one that came to mind is this gorgeous art by @laurelhach (which I didn’t realize was based on a picture until I stumbled across the original picture and was like oh my god!! it looks exactly like the art!!)

#thank you for sending these!! <33 #sircarolyn #asks #gallifrey audios #romana #leela #ramblings #gallifrey spoilers

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mieczyhale · 4 years

Text

~TUA Fic Recs~

for the @tuafeedbackfest !!!! there are so many amazing fics bc this fandom really is insanely talented - i wish i had the time to rec all of the ones i’ve bookmarked tbh - BUT as i don’t:: these are some of my favorites (ones i’ve read multiple times, ones that stuck with me, ones that have just a little extra.. Something??)

Amidst the Chaos by crazynadine [explicit. klave. vietnam] Ten months. Klaus spent ten months in Vietnam, fighting a war he didn't belong in, falling in love with a man he didn't deserve.The long and convoluted tale about how a time traveling junkie and a disillusioned solider found love amidst the chaos of war....

Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene by @obliqueoptimism [klave. vietnam] Klaus says so many horrifying things so casually, and it makes Dave worry.

Bolt from the Blue by @ancientst / TheArchaeologist [mature. parent!klaus. five as klaus’s son] When they were sixteen Klaus successfully escaped for the night, and to celebrate went to the disco with a girl he barely knew. He was young, terribly misguided, but overall the night had been amazing.He just didn't expect to have a baby dumped in his arms nine months later.

can i be the only hope for you by @dancinbutterfly [explicit. klave. vietnam] Klaus is so special the pull of him is overwhelming. Dave doesn’t think he’s strong enough to resist his gravity. He’s too powerful. And fuck it, Dave doesn’t really want to. or (How a fairly ordinary soldier falls in love with Klaus Hargeeves, superhero, time traveler, and medium)

Choirs Threaten in Voices I Only Feel by @veteranklaus [teen rating. klave. typical hargreeves family nonsense] The last time Klaus saw his siblings was at Allison and Patrick's wedding. A lot had changed since then; including the not-so-accidental, irreversible loss of his sight.There's no time to tell them that, though. Not with the return of their long-presumed-dead brother and the impending apocalypse. Plus, it doesn't matter. He's got Ben as a good seeing-eye ghost.

Eggs Benedict for Breakfast by warmhandscoldheart [mature. klave. feral!dave. protective hargreeves] In which Klaus hits his head hard enough to get retroactive amnesia, and Luther does what he thinks is best.

Everyone Gets Here Eventually by @hermitreunited [mature. klave. ghost!dave. tw discussions of suicide] In the afterlife, all it takes to be with your loved ones is for both of you to want to be together. But for some reason, Dave hasn’t been able to reunite with Klaus, so he’ll do what it takes to find him.

i’d rather lose my limb (than let you come to harm) by @bluebacchus [explicit. klave. au. chickens] How Klaus and Dave find each other in a corner of a foreign field in Flanders, 1917. (WWI AU) OR, A story of love, war, and chickens.

If Your Life Won’t Wait by queenbaskerville [teen rating. major character death. family emotions] When Klaus dies on the dance floor, God kicks him out of the afterlife. But she only kicks him out halfway.

i wore his jacket for the longest time by sharkhette [not rated. klave. tw temporary death] Klaus just wants to see Dave again, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen, no matter the cost. Includes conversations with Ben, Diego, God, a surly preacher, and gratuitous references to certain MCR songs.

Neon Groves by Livijoyann [mature. klave. vietnam] Klaus Hargreeves travels back to the Vietnam War and falls in love with Dave... and we've seen almost none of it so far. Enjoy a full following of Klaus's time in 1968 from the first kiss to the first "I love you", and ultimately, to the end (with just about everything in between).

Orange is the New Leather Skirt by Doctor959 [mature. typical hargreeves family nonsense. post-s1] A Misfits/Umbrella Academy crossover (no need to know either fandom to enjoy). The Hargreeves land by a certain community center and shit gets weird

The Light Behind A Cloud by @theseance1968 [explicit. wip. klave. vietnam] An account of Klaus’ time in Vietnam, on a diverged path where Dave survives his injuries. Flowered with opportunities, Klaus chooses to leave his old life behind and stay in the past with him. But how will his decision effect the timeline he abandoned, where his siblings continue to fight to stop the apocalypse in his absence?

The Shadows You Leave Behind by rarae [mature. brothers being brothers. tw discussions of rape and consent] The Hargreeves have stopped the apocalypse and have just returned to the real world from training Vanya in Five's weird pocket dimension. Klaus decides he needs to get some of his things to bring back to the academy and drags Diego along for the ride. They run into one of Klaus’ old ‘friends’ and shit goes down.

the war is over, we are beginning by @karturtle [teen rating. wip. klave. 2019. good brother five] The Hargreeves are slowly beginning to fix things after averting the apocalypse, but Five notices that something is still broken

Two Truths and a Lie by twosidedcoin [general. typical hargreeves family nonsense] “I want to go next,” Klaus announced, “Okay. My eyes are brown. I can see dead people, and I once offered sex to a drug lord to get out of his trunk.”Luther’s fist balled the paper into a ball as he snapped, “The point- Klaus- is to make the lie hard to guess.”Allison nudged Luther with her toe as she corrected, “His eyes are green.”

War is Hell by sauropod [explicit. klave. fix it-ish] Klaus' hands were still filthy with dried blood and muck as he fumbled at the clasps, the combination lock on the top. Desperate, blind hope had his heart going a mile a minute. The dial still read that seemingly random set of numbers it had the first time he opened it on the bus, what felt like a lifetime ago. 0213-18-02-1967“Please.” Klaus choked. “Please work.” He opened the briefcase.

Watch The Heavens (They’re Falling Down) by smile_it_will_get_better [teen rating. wip. typical hargreeves family nonsense] He reached under his pillow on reflex, and there was something there, something hard and rectangular and Five couldn’t help but pull it out.It was a package, encased in brown paper, a small tag attached to the side. Five thumbed it over, ignoring Luther’s inquiries about what it said.To Mr. Five Hargreeves, watch these if you want to survive the apocalypse.

We Only See Each Other at Arrests and Bails by icestorm238 [teen rating. brothers being brothers] aka the five times Diego picked up Klaus from the police station, and the one time Klaus picked up Diego.

Where’s Dave? by multifandom_damnation [teen rating. klaus centric. family emotions] Klaus has a flashback during family time and his siblings finally learn about all the horrific shit he's gone through, a heart to heart ensues and Diego proves how good a brother he really is. It's not a great revelation to have

Wild Eyed Boy by intheflowers [not rated. klave. slow burn. vietnam] Klaus dropped into Dave's life with a flash of blue light.It was the first time Klaus suprised him, but it was far from the last, and while at first he’d wondered if Klaus was maybe a little mad, it wasn’t long before he was certain that he really, definitely was.Not that it mattered much. Klaus had stolen his heart long before then.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ~FIC SERIES RECS~ It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You) by @thefangirlingdead A series of moments between Klaus and Dave, during and post-season one. Definitely a fix-it universe dedicated to giving Klaus the happiness and love he deserves. Hope There’s Someone (Who Will Take Care of Me) by @siriuspiggyback baby that’s just how i am by princex_N He's the only one who tries to get used to it, because what other choice does he have? The others still wait, still ask when he'll be done playing around, still yell at him for being annoying, but no one seems to stop and realize that there's nothing he can do about it.Klaus gets used to it, but he's the only one who does.

#tuafeedbackfest #tua fic rec #maison speaks

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periwinkle-sky202 · 4 years

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Your own ocs

tmy favorite female character

Out of ALL my ocs,,, thats so hard. I adore Mary, Isabelle, Chords, Anna, and Ezra a lot tho!!

My favorite male character

*points at the jones twins* can i get more of these little traumatized bitches even tho jasons nb-

Man fuck it in adding this

my favorite enby character

Jason, Artie, Kas, Them. I love these guys. Theyre all wild

My favorite book/season/etc

Im gonna do this as ‘what story i’ve made is my favorite’ and thats probably the old fantasy world i made with my friend!!! It was so much fun to make and develop, i love making stories and worlds with people

My favorite cast member

Haha thats me

My favorite ship

I could write an essay on the ships i adore. And i will they’ll be under a read more at the bottom,

A character I’d die defending

Uhhh None!! My characters have unlikable qualities and fuck up all the time! My favorite ocs are assholes! I dont feel the need to defend them, some of them are bastards and should be addressed as such

A character I just can’t sympathize with

Im not sure! Not all my characters are sympathetic at all, but I have next to no characters that I like,,,, despise? Besides Gerald whos a shitty abusive dad but thats abt it!! Fuck gerald. I don’t ‘sympathize’ with many of my characters tbh!! I feel bad for them sometimes, but they usually get good endings!

A character I grew to love

I SWEAR JASON HAS THE BIGGEST GLOW UP IN TERMS OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND REWORKING LIKE MY GUY IM SO SORRY YOU WERE ORIGINALLY JUST AN EDGY ‘gonna kill people cause im evil’ BUT ITS OK THEY’RE BETTER NOW.

My anti otp

obv anything goin against my ocs sexualities and also anything just,,,, grody i Despise. its never happened but i amn ready to fight

ALSO

I dont think i can ever forget the time i was talkin to someone(dont remember who) abt Hell Office and the comment was made that jonas and jamison would be cute together and let me tell you that was a one hit ko for a multitude of reasons. The main one being that it made me realize if Hell Office was an actual story with a large enough fandom,,,, some people,,, somewhere,,, would ship them. No Matter What I Would Say they are two white men with a power imbalanced relationship, someone would ship them. the discourse would be Unbridled. My sorrow unlimited. Good thing im bad at focusing long enough to make a popular comic and jonas is in a Healthy Relationship that is on the list below!

Also jamison is aro/ace but that feels less important than the fact hes the worst esp to jonas

ANYWAYS to the ships i like

Jonas/Phoenix

Obvious one! Love these dumbasses. i just think they’re neat and im glad they wound up together. i cant comment much on phoenix’s side of this since they’re not my oc, (Owned by my pal @theartsyskeleton !!) but its a great thing for Jonas. Jonas is a grumpy jackass who up until now didn’t know what he was going to be up until he met Phoenix. fuck, i didnt either!! but they’re together and i think they’re great together. Phoenix’s kindness works well with Jonas’s. y’know. Grumpiness. and they make each other happy!! its fantastic!!

Maia/Glacius

i wont go completely off on this one but i love them!!!! they’re great parents!! again! cant comment too much from Maia’s side bc she belongs to Willow, but Glacius saw a lady who was genuinely kind and he fell in love so fast, but just didn’t say shit bc he didn’t wanna bother her and he loved being her friend!! This ship is just.. friends to lovers in the sweetest way

Jason/Desmond

THEY GOT THEIR ISSUES BUT,,,, They’re good. or. they try to be good! I like this ship because im biased they’re just. two hurt people trying to hang onto someone they can trust who shows them love. On Jason’s side, they’ve been on their own for so long and has never had anyone see them as anything other than the ‘weird person down the street’ or ‘childish.’ Desmond is someone who 1. Showed romantic interest in them, 2. treated them as a mature equal, and 3. was just,,, the first person they made an emotional connection with in a long long time. On Desmond’s side, he’s spent his whole life trying to look after everyone around him and keep them safe from people like Xiana and Isla, and Jason is one of the first people that have been willing to protect him, and they make him feel safe and heard when he wants to talk/vent about everything hes been through.

Their relationship definitely isn’t perfect, though, and I know this! Jason has convinced themself that Desmond is a perfect person who can’t be wrong, and Desmond still tries to take care of everyone and fix everything around him, including him not wanting to tell Jason things they’re doing wrong and just wanting to help them out of every hard situation they’re in.Their relationship isn’t great!! They’ve decided each other are their only emotional support and want to go through everything with each other so they’re also pretty clingy! But! I still think this relationship is interesting and i like them they just need Work

#actually im not finished #gonna go off a lil more #i forgot to add this fact abt jason! theyre a jealous and clingy motherfucker #theyve never HAD a datemate before! they dont know how to Act so theyre clingy #not to exactly a Toxic degree but its there #also Glacius doesnt know how to even start a romantic relationship bc 1 hes never been in one and 2 hes never rly been taught How #They Start #so he just quietly pines from the corner and cries when maia smiles

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therubyjailcell · 5 years

Text

Name shenanigans

So... I need to ramble for a bit, about names and stuffs. You don’t have to read. It’s just a long ass post about me and how I wanna be called lol.

My birthname starts with a V. My parents, my family, they refuse to call me by anything else than my birthname, and they don’t use the correct pronouns. At first, I was okay with it. Then, slowly, oh so slowly, my birthname (I won’t call it deadname. It’s not a deadname, it’s a really pretty name, and I love it. It doesn’t suit me is all.), well, it started making me feel weird. Bad weird. I started not feeling comfortable with my birthname and the pronouns my family used. And when I mentionned it, my parents said “But you’re our daughter for 18 years now. We can’t change the way we talk now.”. It hurt. A lot. I started asking people not to use my birthname anymore at all and use male pronouns in french (I dislike the neutral ones, they sound weird to me, they’re a combination of male and female pronouns), even in front of my parents. My friends agreed.

Now, let’s be clear: I’m genderfluid. I’m non-binary genderfluid, I change gender depending on a fuckton of factors and variables. I’m proud of who I am. The reason I use male pronouns in french (and a few other languages), is basically a choice of aesthetic and sounds.

I’ve watched the videos from Thomas Sanders for a while now. Sometimes I stop and then I catch up, but the point is, I was watching them before the Anxiety character appeared in the Sanders Sides vids. And as soon as he appeared, I could relate to him a lot. If you ask me, I’ll say I’m a fusion between Logic and Anxiety (and I’m not using their names for a reason btw, just you wait). But Anxiety is really close to who I am, me who has so much anxiety issues that I spent a year locked up in my room, barely going out, and who has at least 1 panic attack every week. I loved the character right away, even when he was often depicted as a bad character. Because it was me. And then, Thomas revealed his name, his actual name. Virgil.

Now, let’s look back at my birthname, shall we? It’s an Eastern-European name, doesn’t really exist in my country (apart from the North-East that belonged to the germans at some point, hm), it’s really common in my other country (I’m half french, half german), and it’s a common name in my grandpa’s home country (Hungary). It’s pretty uncommon to hear it, when you can pronounce it properly, you can’t write it properly, and when you can write it properly, you can’t pronounce it properly. It starts with a V, and it is actually close to Virgil, to me.

I immediately became confused. I didn’t know how to feel about the name. It was pretty, sure, but... Did I like it? It reminded me of my birthname. And I was at a moment of my life where I hated my birthname because my parents wouldn’t let me be myself. So. Virgil. I didn’t know how to feel at that point.

Cue to a year or so? After? (Just checked, and yep, around a year after) At the beginning of this school year, new school, new city, new people. A friend of mine (@/morporkianhobbit) gets into the Sanders Sides vids, and talk about it a lot. I watch them all all over again, to remind myself of the details, because my friend tends to ask a bunch of questions about very specific stuffs, and I want to be able to help her understand what she might’ve missed. I met her as I arrived on my first day, we spend hella lot of time together, she’s super supportive, and honestly, going back to an old fandom to have more discussion subject with her is one hell of a good idea. My old rp group gets sort of back together, 3 of the other 5 people who were there before agree to rp with me again. This time I rp a side as well. I look at more famders blogs, meeting new people in the fandom. I stumble into @/sugarglider9603 (I’m not tagging anyone bc I don’t wanna bother people tbh), and I fall in love with her Mario AU. After a while, she and @/galaxy-lilies make the Spiderverse Sides AU. I love it, and I love the Into The Spiderverse movie. I created a bunch of AU the past few months. I enter the Spiderverse discord.

Now, about my name, in the meantime, I’ve learned a bit. I don’t hate my birthname anymore. My family still isn’t supportive of my gender (and my parents still aren’t convinced the ace spectrum exist, but at least I can date whoever I want, as they don’t care wether I like a gender or another, and my own mother tells me she’s pansexual). But my birthname is pretty, I don’t live with my parents most of the time, and I’m meeting new people, people who respect my pronouns and name. As for Anxiety’s actual name, I like it. Virgil is a pretty name, an amazing name, and it doesn’t sound that close to my birthname anymore. It isn’t painful to hear it anymore. I made peace with both this name and my birthname.

On the discord server, we start rpying. I call on Virgil, so I get to rp as him. I cannot remember anyone’s names, to be honest, unless the person repeats it to me several times, and I’m always convinced imma mess up, hence why I give people nicknames. Our Patton starts calling us by the name of the character we rp. I join her in on that. They all call me V or Virge. And I’m okay with it.

I actually like it. I feel like it fits, even.

I talk about it to my best friend (@/hecking-garbage). They say it’s because V refers to “Virgil” and not to my birthname anymore. It does, but that doesn’t explain why I feel like it fits. I ask another of my friend (@/angels-and-dreams), who says (and I quote there) “Maybe you can just call yourself V, with a spelling like Vea or Vee or something like that“ while I see what I’d like to do with my name. I like the idea of being called V or Vee for now, and see how it goes from there. That’s my choice. And I add that “Vee. Huh. I like it. And I could actually ask my teachers to shorten my name to Vee, as it is the beginning of my birthname, and wouldn't seem as strange as Aky.“, which is true. I decide I can actually go see my formation manager, to ask her if I can change my name in the school papers, so the teacher would gender me properly.

This is what I’m going to do next week. I’m going to ask my teacher to call me Vee, and see how it goes from there.

My name is V. And I like it.

#personal #me #v #aky #or: how thomas sanders helped me find my name without him knowing he did #lol #sorry it's so long tbh #imma change my bio now lol #and message people #name #my names #i'll still answer to Aky dw bout that #just needed to get it out #but V is me now #Aky is more like... a middle name? I guess?#internet name kinda

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jobethdalloway · 6 years

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CLEXACON RECAP omfg

bc this needs to go somewhere & @mnhooch was kind enough to ask. tried to bold some highlights bc this is basically a long-ass diary entry ramble haha

-the first thing I went to was a panel called “Gaysian: Queer Asian Representation in the Media” with 4 incredibly rad/funny/super smart folks. Really enlightening convo on finding bits and pieces of characters who don’t look like/sound like you to relate to. A highlight: the first question was asking them if there are any queer Asian characters in the media they related to growing up and the last one said “Well, of course, Mulan” and there was like this loud “MMMMMM yeahhhh” that like rippled through the audience. Pressed to clarify which Mulan: “THE CARTOON one, come on”

-the moderator for the LGBTQ Actress panel was hilarious and the women on it were all wonderful so it was great to get to hear from them/learn about them but for me it was ALL ABOUT STEPHANIE BEATRIZ OMMMMMMGGG. Seeing how bubbly she is irl is a good reminder of how solid her performance is as Rosa like dang. Highlight: Stephanie tearing up talking about how much it meant to her to read the dialogue “I’m bisexual,” laid clearly and deliberately, in the script where Rosa come out

-SO MANY STUNNING BUTCHES EVERYWHERE??? omg. also it was just really cool to be in a space with so many women and nb folks. Pretty much every other gay-anything I’ve tried to go to has been 98% cis gay guys so this was like huge in a way I wasn’t anticipating

-OLDER WOMEN WHO’VE BEEN WAITING DECADES FOR GOOD REPRESENTATION, and they were there, and they love the shows we love and it warmed my heart. Also people came from around the globe for this and that was so cool

-AMAZING COSPLAYERS!!! Faves: 2 people dressed as Valkyries, Xena & Gabrielle, and too many gorgeous Alex Danvers(...es) to count

-saw a group of short documentaries, some of which were like ok but there were 2 great ones - butch coyolxauhqui (x) (about a butch learning to love her body with the help of her mother & an Aztec goddess) and a place in the middle (x) (about a Hawaiian child reclaiming traditional notions about gender from an awesome teacher)

-an awesome panel on butch representation in the media! Wish more people could’ve made it to that one. Such an important reminder that there is soooo far to go. Good introspection about internalized lesbophobia (”cured” tomboys in kid movies; butches being the lesbian equivalent of effeminate men where the stereotype is what our internalized phobia wants to get away from instead of embracing as we should)/the fact that it’s a stereotype but still like never seen?? and if it is seen, is usually negative. sigh.

-a panel on sapphic fanfic! Which was actually really inspiring and makes me want to get back into writing. Because I love it. I love writing, you guys.

DAY 2? ALREADY OMG

-started off the day in the way, way back of the auditorium for the Wayhaught panel which was so much fun! Kat & Dom are too adorable for words. Highlight: Kat’s response when asked about her thoughts on things like fanart/fanfic. idk, it was really heartwearming/inspiring. Something along the lines of, “this character may look like me but it’s the spirit of Nicole that matters, and the spirit belongs to all of us, not just me” ergo she sees fanart and sees Nicole, not herself. No single person/entity owns the character. idk that was just a really awesome thing to hear an actor say

-short comedies!! Sadly I had to duck out of this one early, but I loved 2 of the ones I saw here - a USC thesis (trailer) and a hilarious/touching one by a Philippine filmmaker called “salamagan” that unfortunately I can’t find online anywhere

-CHYLER LEIGH. CHYLER LEIGH, HOLY SHIT. This was like. The most moving Q&A I think I’ve ever been able to experience. As I was sitting there, it really registered with me how shitty it felt to have to put up with actresses (not just a certain 2) for years who were ashamed - vocally and specifically - of fans like us. Not for being over-zealous, but being queer and having queer feelings and seeking validation. How shitty it felt to have those actresses make fun of us on talk shows; make us feel gross/stupid/deluded/embarrassing for feeling the way we did & thus perpetuating internalized fears and shame in abundance. I know there are plenty of actresses who are truly great allies and who care about their LGBTQ fans, but Chyler like ... is so engaged?? She was so emotional and you can see that she gets it, she does not take her responsibility lightly and she is wonderful. I was also reminded of the distinction between seeing ourselves/hearing ourselves in media. bc i’m white, I do get to see queer characters who look like me more and more on TV/the movies (certainly more than I was a kid), but Alex is the first(/only?) one who I’ve really heard myself in and that feels significant Highlight: I got to ask her a question! And I was the last one they had time for so phew. Here’s a link to the whole panel, set to start at my question *^^ (but I definitely recommend watching the whole thing the next time you have an hour to spare) (I MADE HER LAUGH. Kinda hard to make out what I said at the beginning, which is, “oh wow, lesbians are short” bc I’m almost 6′ tall and the mic stand was very very low) (I WAS TREMBLING THE WHOLE TIME Y’ALL)

-highlight: a DELIGHTFUL/wonderful feature called “Signature Move” (trailer). You want a good lesbian movie? HERE’S A GOOD LESBIAN MOVIE!!! Nobody dies, no lesbians have to date men, one of the leads is a butch Pakistani-American and the other is Mexican-American and we see their complicated/beautiful relationships with their mothers and it’s FUNNY AS HELL and the leads are HANDSOME AND BEAUTIFUL AS HELL and it needs all the viewers

-highlight: I got to meet @thefootlightclub and @missmaclay after years of being tumblr buddies!! They are both delightful/amazing people and it was so fun to like, fangirl irl with people. And since I went to this con alone, it was really cool to get to talk to other people about it, haha. They introduced me to some awesome peeps including the lovely @amyroot! Thanks y’all for being so friendly and welcoming me in. Also @thefootlightclub and I talked about how June Allyson should totally have a massive lesbian following bc Jo March and that voice, amirite #imright

DAY 3 OH NO THE WEEKEND IS ENDING

-really sad short films today!! Most of them not great, but there was one that wove in Mrs Dalloway and that was pretty cool/I was stunned to see that the cinematographer was a childhood friend of mine! Who is Mormon! And apparently worked on a film about lesbians! He’s a cool guy and that was a fun surprise. One of the films was pretty powerful and gave me AYLT feels (if my epilogue had been depressing AF) (trailer)

-there was a panel called “empowerment through fandom,” which was nice but pretty much wound up being for Earpers. Validating to know one of the panelists was a reporter and it’s like aha okay this stuff is for people in all walks of life/professions/ages. Validating all around.

-I wandered around the vendor booths and picked up a couple of pins/postcards. So many talented people! Probably just as well that I didn’t look too hard at this stuff until the last day bc stuff was sold out and I probably would’ve spent $$ I didn’t have on some of these rad shirts/posters haha

-went to a panel on Queer Films, which I kind of thought would be more of like a presentation/discussion on the history of films but it was more about how to get them made/how hard it is to do that. The panelists and moderator were great, though, and had some great insights. Specifically, the producer of “Elena Undone” (which I admit I could not finish but deeply wanted to like) talked about how you have to do the best with what you have bc sometimes you just can’t raise the money you want/need to get the film you’d really like bc people don’t like to finance lesbian films and that was kind of humbling to keep in mind

-rounded it all out by watching DEBS, obviously one of the greatest films of all time. Highlight: there were a lot of older women at the con, which was really wonderful to see, and 2 of them were sitting behind me. One said to the other, “I wasn’t sure I was going to come to this but these kids downstairs said ‘oh you totally have to go.’ Well, one said, ‘you “totes” have to,’ which I took to mean ‘totally.’” It was great to hear them laughing behind me the whole time! WHAT AN ICONIC MOVIE.

-I got to eat at Cafe Rio which is always ALWAYS A PLUS

Anyway, wow, what a fantastic weekend. I feel so, so lucky that I was able to go and meet so many amazing people and hear so many amazing people and be surrounded by the love. I never ever thought I’d go to a con - not for any condescending reason, just bc I never thought there was enough I’d ever be interested in to make it worth attending. But this? Wow. Tailor-made for me - for so many of us. If I had a wish then it would be that we could all go to Clexacon next year!

/is it next year yet

#clexacon #personal #ramble

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