#I love your posts by the way!!!!

[lazylittledragon]

you know what fuck it we’re doing dadstarion

#bg3 #baldur’s gate 3 #astarion #tavstarion #idk if this is canon to the dorianverse yet but he looks like a little hobbit!!! #this is a Long long long time post brain i think. since they’ve sorted out the daywalker thing #i don’t think he’d be affectionate but i think he’d be VERY protective #they’re not bad parents in the way that they neglect or mistreat him or even just don’t love him #i think they love him to death but you just shouldn’t give your small child a KNIFE #this one is my favourite sister bc she reminds me of robin

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[sapsolace]

obsessed w these boneheads as of late :]

#griddlehark #tlt #the locked tomb #gideon nav #harrowhark nonagesimus #gtn #when u and the situationship livin it up in a haunted palace... FO FREE!!!!! #i wanted 2 do a background 4 this but college and work have been kicking my ASS so #figured i should just post it and move on i got other sketches and wips #anyways hello tlt fans do not expect me 2 draw anything the same twice. love u <3 #in this kitchen we fuck it And we ball. no artistic sameness and we like it that way. i also serve food once a month #stay at your own risk #i've been going insane over tlt by myself on my side acc and the longer i have no one 2 talk abt nona grief with #the more art i will pop out. but also pls i need 2 talk abt this shit w someone i'm coughing and dying out here

[earl-of-221b]

I can’t explain what blue eye samurai makes me feel…….its a typical revenge story, a man sets out on his hero’s journey to kill the four men who have wronged him. A lone ronin, wide brimmed hat and sword in hand, roaming Edo Japan on his vendetta. But he’s not a man. He’s a woman. And how has he been wronged? What’s she getting revenge on?

On the fact that she exists. She wants revenge on the four white men that could possibly have conceived her. Who got her Japanese mother pregnant with a blue-eyed child. And not just any blue-eyed child, but a girl child. How is she possibly supposed to live in the world like that? For the wrong of being conceived, for the wrong of being born, for the wrong of being birthed into a world that will never love or accept her, she will kill her father.

I don’t know what level of convoluted self hate that is. Is she a child of rape? Or a child of a whore? Halfway through I realise what she told herself at the start couldn’t possibly be true - it’s not really for her mother. Her mother wasn’t the root of her vendetta, she wasn’t really doing it for her. When she leaves that farm and leaves the chance to live a simple, legitimate life as a woman, she goes right back to hunting down the men. Those men personally wronged her.

And then there’s so much to be discussed surrounding the way she grew up, because as a boy child and a man she can afford so much more than life has dealt her. Her swordfather who took her in out of the love and care in his heart had no shame in teaching a mixed man his art. The face of a ‘demon’ is fine. But not the identity of a woman. Shh. Don’t say it. Don’t confess. He knows and doesn’t want to hear it.

And because she’s lived that way her entire life for safety and security, she’s so completely alienated from being a woman, perhaps she really is he. But not really by choice. Or is it? The thing she does best is the art of killing, the art of men. Gender is a prison and gender is a performance and she has to choose which to perform. The times cannot reconcile hatred and violence with a woman. So she lives as a man.

So she can get revenge on her father, for revenge on herself.

#blue eye samurai #everything about mizu is so deeply upsetting #like ok revenge!! #revenge of what - exactly?! #white men? #and/ or your white self? #born against your will? #and who and what shapes this will of yours except the society you were born in? #this is so deeply fucked in every way #but anyways #I love Mizu and I hope he kills his father dead. if only - if only that would satisfy her. #my posts

[peachyykira]

Hey, that’s my mutual I wanna fuck. Go get your own. 😤😤😤😤

#talking peach #tbh way more than just fuck #but ya know #for the purpose of this post it fits #also wanna love and kiss and hug and make him feel special and good about himself #anyway… GO GET YOUR OWN I DONT LIKE TO SHARE

[suiheisen]

you think YOU had a bad day at work?

bonus: sid shrieking "no!!!! NO!!!!!" loud enough to be heard in the stands and on camera

#this is now my FAVOURITE game i've watched in real life knocking the game misconduct one off the number one rank #he was so annoyed the entire game and so annoying about it :') #he kept shrieking away on the bench and i couldn't hear a word from where i was seated #but you could just hear this constant yipping away dhfsgfkjshgfsjf PLEASE it was so funny your 36-year-old babygirl was BARKING #drew kept sitting there like... is mom okay... i don't think mom's okay... #also extremely good for me (since he wasn't really hurt) was the whumpfest of it all oh my god what ancient gods did he anger......... #geno kept Hovering in concern #po kept giving him little shoulder pats the way a sweet brave babyboy would try his best to soothe a rabid little dog #ek of course kept trying to slide right inside him and also kept skating up to him and STARING him in the face in concern/lust/both #also guys this is my first time in canada ever!!!!!!!! i'm excited #anyway. very good game for me sorry for this post but you know i love a #long post #sidney crosby #evgeni malkin #pittsburgh penguins #also!!! to all who celebrate #ramadan kareem/eid mubarak #<333 staying with a friend here through the eid celebration and they've been cooking and everything smells so good

[stil-lindigo]

reverb in an empty hall.

prints (all proceeds go towards aid for Gaza)

#the plan for this comic has been lying in my notes app for months now #i felt compelled to make it now #my mental health has really been in the pits lately which means ive been playing disco elysium a lot again #the bleak reality of the game and the beauty that persists in it despite *everything* in it comforts me #i love you disco elysium #i love you kim kitsuragi #i love you harry #take what you will from this comic but for me at least its about saving as many people as you can on your way out #i hope that's properly conveyed <3 #disco elysium #harry dubois #kim kitsuragi #whirling in rags #stillindigo art #it may surprise some of u to know this but before the Palestinian genocide began I was predominantly just an art blog #I haven’t posted new art in 4 months

[thnks--fr-th-vnm]

MORE SECRETARY GERARD :3

always thinking about him

#mcr #my chemical romance #i brought you my bullets you brought me your love #the black parade #the true lives of the fabulous killjoys #three cheers for sweet revenge #danger days #gerard way #my chem gerard #secretary gerard #my chemical gerard #mcr gerard #i think i've posted some of these photos before #but i don't care #they're great #i'm posting them again :)

[golyadkin]

I cannot express enough that if your reaction, as a hobby artist, to not getting that many notes on your art is to say "maybe I should just stop doing art altogether" you need to stop posting art to tumblr

not necessarily forever, not even for long, but just stop putting your art on here and start doing it for you again, remember why you enjoyed doing art in the first place and stop relying on the attention of faceless people on the internet for your enjoyment of your hard work

believe me, I get it, nothing crushes the artistic soul quite like labouring for hours on a piece only for it to get like 10 notes, so you need to find your own source of joy in the act of creation and a lot of the time that means making art and not showing it to anybody

#not art #listen #for real #this is not about any one person because i've seen posts about it from a bunch of people #you think i post everything here? buddy i dont even post half my stuff here #every drawing you see is preceded by five more just like it #that never see my cursor close to the save button #i have a sketchbook i draw in regularly that i do'nt show to a single goddam person #i make cutout art from gels i steal from work and stick them to my windows and do paintings in my living room just for me #because that it the only way you are ever going to be able to retain your original love of art #is by doing it for the sake of doing it #not for the sake of seeing how many people stop and stare #anyways i'm sorry if this sounds terse #but i'm so sick of seeing artists put all their self-esteem and happiness in the hands of a blogging website #stop selling yourself short by measuring your self worth by how many reblogs you get and what people say in the tags #your artistry and your happiness are worth more than that #if you're an artist for a living that's another story #but even then #even then #anyways sorry i'm done ranting

[chucktaylorupset]

I think there's something to be said for fanfiction that loves canon in a way that’s rude. Like thank you for this wonderful thematic tragedy made out of this character’s entire arc ending in death, it was emotionally and intellectually moving, but also fuck you fuck you fuck you they live, this time and every time they live, they never died, their flaws are not their undoing, actually they have no flaws, actually they save everyone, actually who cares about a story, any story, where this one dies, actually i cared about that story so much i made a new one, actually i cared so much i unmade the old one, you gave me morals and i left them for the mortal, but they’re mine now and i will never let them die, actually thank you, actually fuck you, strongly worded letter to follow

A kiss for canon and spit in its face all at once, it’s great

#my post #i use and plan to use the 'canonical character death tag' WAY too much to post this but still #fanfiction #everybody live nobody dies au #and a five #this is about your blorbo absolutely but before that it was about #robb stark #to crown him is to kill him #on the one hand he must die because there are no good kings #king of the north was the death knell of robb the good brother robb the good son robb the loving friend #on the other hand #he was the nicest sixteen year old in the world #on the other hand fuck you there sits the only king i mean to bend my knee too #what if king was just a name for a brother who loved you #love that story of thematic importance about the inherent devastation of feudalism #but fuck you he's perfect and he lives #fuck you let him be soft and let him be mine #in general im against sandpapering your blorbos but actually my blorbos are soft and round and perfect #boubas if you will #and who cares if theyre a little unrecognizable #the version of them that gets to live #resurrection and comes back wrong but with the multiverse of what if they lived fanfiction

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Reasons to play In Stars and Time: Canon Pronoun Warfare.

#in stars and time #ISAT #Siffrin #Loop #Context: early on you meet a character who tries to get you to use the royal We pronoun for them and you shut them down. It's great. #The gender swag and non-binary rep in this game is lovely. #I sketched this out when I was in Act 2 - and as of posting this I have not yet finished the game so *please* no spoilers. #It is rare for me to get into something spoiler free and I have been getting my shit rocked by this game in the best way. #Yes I *am* taking another detour to talk about a video game I love again. I will have some fun crossovers. Trust the process. #I will also do my best to pitch this game as spoiler free as possible. Because you *should* play this game: #ISAT is a very lovingly crafted RPG with very fun and emotional writing. #The characters are great and the mysteries you slowly uncover are intriguing! #The way the gameplay ties into the player's own emotional state is nearly always in sync with the protagonist. You *will* feel things. #And it is not afraid to let those things be hard emotions! Do mind the content warnings and know your limits though. #As someone who sucks at video games I also appreciate that it is so generous with your time and keeps things fun. #Not to mention it is honestly underpriced for the amount of content in it. Buy this game. I need to spread the brainworms.

[ectoplasmer]

need to kiss him until we’re both silly and delirious and giggling, until we’re both grabbing at each other’s shoulders and sides and arms, until we’re both half hazardously stumbling our way backwards onto the couch in a heap of laughter just so we can be as close as possible and we’re clumsily bumping foreheads and noses. need to kiss him until he can’t stop smiling and until we’re both stupidly lovestruck and just clinging to each other

#head in hands. i need to be kissed #waaaaah ignore meeeee… #but not like. really. witness me being so horrendously in love with the card game anime boy please #warmshipping #was going to say something about breathing each other’s air but i’d sound way more unhinged about this guy if i did so #i will be. somewhat normal. for now #rainy’s posting about premarital kissing again everyone point and laugh #self ship #f/o imagines #romantic f/o #self shipping #imagine your f/o

[deuteragonist1]

Wait a damn minute Merlin is an actual nightmare of a servant. Imagine you're the Prince and all of a sudden and only two seconds after surviving an assassination attempt you're stuck with this scrawny, clumsy fucking dude with a really shifty air about him who spends literal days in the tavern with zero notice, steals your food, tried to spy on a guest, doesn't let you hunt, can never fucking be found when you need him even though he is the literal manservant to the prince, which you would think should be a priority but apparently he has better things to do, and is always talking like he's the only thing standing between you and certain death???? Then he gives you attitude? Literally I would throw things at him too. Arthur is misunderstood he's actually being too nice

#i actually love merlin okay this is a joke #but like damn he did suck at his job #disclaimer the author of this post does not condone mistreating your manservants in any way #if you have a manservant you should count yourself very lucky and show them appreciation #kiss them on the forehead #maybe ask them out #just throwing out ideas #being scrawny isn't a crime but merlin being scrawny is very personal to me #and to arthur i guess #merthur #bbc merlin #merlin emrys #bbc arthur #arthur pendragon

[whollyjoly]

look i can explain-

#the bucktommy brainrot is REAL #i love them your honor #i am just so fucking pleased that this is REAL #so please excuse the obsessive posting until my brainrot clears up #(....it might not) #bucktommy #kinkley #tuck #otp: better ways to get your attention #fuck i love EVERYTHING about them actually #evan buckley #tommy kinard #911 spoilers #911 on abc #911 abc #mine #em's memes #i guess?

[theramblingvoid]

Low level/continuous pain tips for writing

Want to avoid the action movie effect and make your character's injuries have realistic lasting impacts? Have a sick character you're using as hurt/comfort fodder? Everyone has tips for how to write Dramatic Intense Agony, but the smaller human details of lasting or low-level discomfort are rarely written in. Here are a few pain mannerisms I like to use as reference:

General

Continuously gritted teeth (may cause headaches or additional jaw pain over time)

Irritability, increased sensitivity to lights, sounds, etc

Repetitive movements (fidgeting, unable to sit still, slight rocking or other habitual movement to self-soothe)

Soft groaning or whimpering, when pain increases or when others aren't around

Heavier breathing, panting, may be deeper or shallower than normal

Moving less quickly, resistant to unnecessary movement

Itching in the case of healing wounds

Subconsciously hunching around the pain (eg. slumped shoulders or bad posture for gut pain)

Using a hand to steady themself when walking past walls, counters, etc (also applies to illness)

Narration-wise: may not notice the pain was there until it's gone because they got so used to it, or may not realize how bad it was until it gets better

May stop mentioning it outright to other people unless they specifically ask or the pain increases

Limb pain

Subtly leaning on surfaces whenever possible to take weight off foot/leg pain

Rubbing sore spots while thinking or resting

Wincing and switching to using other limb frequently (new/forgettable pain) or developed habit of using non dominant limb for tasks (constant/long term pain)

Propping leg up when sitting to reduce inflammation

Holding arm closer to body/moving it less

Moving differently to avoid bending joints (eg. bending at the waist instead of the knees to pick something up)

Nausea/fever/non-pain discomfort

Many of the same things as above (groaning, leaning, differences in movement)

May avoid sudden movements or turning head for nausea

Urge to press up against cold surfaces for fever

Glazed eyes, fixed stare, may take longer to process words or get their attention

Shivering, shaking, loss of fine motor control

If you have any more details that you personally use to bring characters to life in these situations, I'd love to hear them! I'm always looking for ways to make my guys suffer more write people with more realism :)

#voidrambles #writing #whump #does this count as that? whatever those folks will probably enjoy it at any rate #this is honestly mostly for my own reference but i hope it can maybe help some other people too :) #I'm so pulled in by books that write pain in a human and detailed way and not just when it's dramatic or intense #would love to see more of that and incorporate it into my own writing #oh i should have added. distraction seeking to that list #like writing a really long post about. #...yes i may be chronically ill and having a flare today and yes i may be farming myself for writing tips for Future Me hdgfhfhsjs #but hey gotta do your research somewhere babeyyy it all goes in the creativity soup #tw injury #tw illness

[egophiliac]

With the best of your writing or drawing ability, how do you sum up Twisted Wonderland Book 1 till Book 6?

I'm so sorry to make you wait so long for such a stupid joke

#art #twisted wonderland #shockingly not really spoilers for once? #i apologize that this isn't cleverer but. it's true. #either everything is crowley's fault because he has some secret vaguely-implied diabolical plot #or everything is crowley's fault because he is a terrible terrible administrator #frankly i'm becoming increasingly convinced that this man couldn't mastermind his way out of a paper bag #this is 100% a pro-crowley post btw. i love this birdbrain. #look he's been running this school for (mumblemumble) years and everything was FINE #but you let a handful of students turn into horrible monsters and suddenly it's 'negligence' this and 'unfit for your position' that #and that's not even including when he let a teacher take the students into the woods and then hunt them for sport #...twice #like ambrose has never had to cover up a little grievous bodily harm. as if.