#I know some people are bothered by that kinda thing

[aspiringtrashpanda]

✨MC teaches the brothers about "jinx"✨

“I’m kinda hungry,” you voiced, your Curses and Hexes homework doing little to retain your attention. 

Mammon snorted in response, not bothering to look up from his D.D.D. “Who are ya? Beel?”  

You waited a second before retaliating, hoping that someone would come to your defense. Alas, it seemed that the brothers lounging around you had long learned to tune out any word from Mammon’s lips.  

“I have basic needs like all of you too, you know,” you huffed, gesturing to the Avatar of Gluttony, cross-legged on the carpet next to you.  The warmth from the fireplace at your backs cast flickering light over the crinkled chip bag in his massive hand. “Eating isn’t trademarked by Beel.” 

Beel grunted, sharp snaps sounding from the rhythmic churn of his jaw.  

Levi’s handheld console let out a chime that signaled some sort of victory. “It’s only, like, his whole personality lmao.” 

Beel’s chewing paused, but Asmo swooped in first. “There’s more to Beel than food,” he cooed, “I mean, look at those sculpted muscles! He’s also the most handsome little brother~ ♡ ”  

“Gee, thanks Asmo,” grumbled the lump of blankets on the couch.  

“Aw Belphie, don’t be like that! I like your slender physique, too!” 

Somehow, the mound of linens seemed to shudder in distaste. Asmo only shrugged, losing himself in his hand mirror.  

“Asmo is right though,” Satan hummed, turning the page of his current book – A Comprehensive Guide to the Devildom’s Most Toxic Plants, “To define Beel as solely a glutton does little to recognize all his positive characteristics.”  

Beel swallowed, before flashing a dazzling beam. “Thanks, Satan.”   

The living room fell silent once more, save for Beel’s snacking and the crackling of the hearth.  

“Hey!” You thought you’d try again. “Know what I could go for right now?” 

You paused for anticipation, readying your answer. 1, 2, 3 and... 

“Hell’s Kitchen.” 

Your spine went ramrod straight, eyes locking onto Mammon in the split second after your voices had harmonized.  

“Jinx!” You gasped, “You owe me a soda!”  

“Huh?” Mammon blinked owlishly.  

“Jinx!” Your enthusiasm was lost on your company. Your neck cracked as you glanced from brother to brother, your grin dampening when they looked at you as though you’d grown a second head.  

Satan frowned. “What are you talking about?” 

“Is that some normie saying?” Though he sneered, there was curiosity in Levi’s eyes.  

“You don’t have jinx here?” You barreled onward, explaining, “It’s a game we play in the human world when two people say the same thing at the same time.” 

“How does it work?” Asmo pursed his lip, which only drew his attention to his shade of lip gloss, his mirror capturing his eyes once more.  

You shrugged, “There are various versions of the game. Sometimes, the loser can’t speak until they buy the victor a drink. Other times, they’re silenced until their name is uttered aloud 3 times.”

Mammon lunged forward, toppling off the couch as he rushed on all fours to where you sat on the carpet. Before he could protest, eyes wild with a mix of fear and anger, you placed a finger to his lips. 

“Nope! Not ‘til you buy me a Devil Cola!”  

“LOL!” Levi rejoiced, “Mammon, you’re such a n00b!” 

You weren’t the only one who noticed the way Mammon’s eyes brightened, Satan chiding, “Watch it. You can’t say his name or he’s freed, remember?” 

“Oh~ I wonder how long he can hold his tongue?” Asmo giggled, finally distracted from his mirror. You couldn’t blame him. Mammon’s expression was a cross between anguished and constipated.  

His jaw clenching, slivers of his teeth glinting through curled lips, you could feel the irritation radiating from the Avatar of Greed. Absently, you considered if you should tell him it wasn’t an actual curse. Did he know there was no power other than himself silencing him?  

“Can he eat?” Beel inquired, genuine concern mingling with sympathy as he watched his older brother straighten up and march towards the entrance hall.  

“You don't need to speak to eat,” Belphie's muffled voice reasoned beneath the blankets.

“HEY MAMS!” You called to his back, shoulders curled up to his ears in anger, “Buy me a Devil Cola, won’t you?"

And really, you hadn’t expected him to follow through at all. He left the room and you returned to your homework. Beel continued eating, Belphie continued sleeping, and Satan continued reading for the sole purpose of poisoning Lucifer, you were sure. 

About thirty minutes passed before you heard the door to the Hall of Lamentation creak open.  

“No way!” Asmo squealed, a shutter sounding before Mammon could sprint to the couch and swat the D.D.D. from his freshly manicured hands.

Your jaw hit the floor as you looked up at the second born, at the condensation dripping down the can of soda that he thrust in your face. A petulant pout only brightened his blush, the way his eyes looked anywhere but you. The red tint to his skin darkened as his brothers laughed, jeered, teased him.  

The least you could do was offer him some praise. You smiled with all your teeth, “Thanks Mammon! The jinx is lifted.” 

He scowled, waving off your gratitude with an unnecessarily noisy exhale. With his newfound freedom, he instantly started pestering Asmo, critiquing his most recent Devilgram selfies. As your heart swelled with affection, the words in your textbook falling on blind eyes too occupied by the tiniest movements of your family, you felt completely at ease.  

You didn’t think you needed to elaborate, to clarify that you had used your pact and that there was no real magic behind the jinx. 

However, when you entered the House of Lamentation two weeks later, you realized you had been very wrong. 

The living room was a disaster, pillows tossed this way and that, candle wax oozing across something that looked suspiciously like a summoning circle. Splintered wood littered the carpet, broken chairs in a mangled pile next to the hearth. You were pretty sure you could smell something burning.  

You nearly dropped the bag of groceries in your arms, Beel stock still at your side. One look at your shopping buddy told you he had no idea what was going on, concern blazing to life in his purple eyes. 

“Lucifer?!” He called out, immediately seeking reassurance. 

Instead of the eldest’s smooth drawl, you were met with an incomprehensible shriek from somewhere in the kitchen. A clatter of pots and pans. A crash.  

Belphie came sauntering into the room, nodding in greeting. “The jinx didn’t work.” 

“What?!” You gawked, surveying the damage to the room, “What is going on?!” 

“He could still talk!” Satan fumed, stomping out of the kitchen with his bony tail lashing back and forth, “So I cursed him, but then that asshole reflected it, and it hit Asmo instead.” 

Sure enough, a completely drenched Avatar of Lust was next to appear, his mouth moving a mile a minute and yet, not a single sound to be heard. He tossed his hands in the air, hissing something fierce before flicking a wet strand of hair from his face.  

“And Asmo tried to charm Mammon to speak for him,” Satan was still ranting, “but Mammon tried to charge him for his services, which then set Levi off about repayment with interest.” 

You hugged the groceries tighter to your chest, squeezing your eyes shut as you realized you knew exactly what was happening in the kitchen. You heard the roar, the rumble of the house’s foundation, the continuous rush of water drowning out twin shouts you had heard far too many times before. 

But not as many times as the one voice that rose above them all.  

“MAMMOOOON?!” 

You winced. You’d have to buy your first a Devil Cola later.  

*・゜・*:.。.*.。.:*・☆・゜・*:.。.*.。.:*・☆・゜

technically mammon was the one to provoke levi to summon lotan, so rip buddy. but let's be real, they're all getting punished.

REQUESTS ARE OPEN. READ MORE HERE.

#obey me nightbringer #obey me shall we date #obey me leviathan #obey me #obey me belphegor #obey me satan #obey me mammon #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me drabble #my writing #aspiringtrashpanda #if you want to send me requests you can #the inbox is open

[venusplan]

How jjk men treat you on your period

an: I really hate periods so here's a post about what the JJK men treat u during yours <3 challenging myself with the one because I've never wrote for Geto, Nanami, Choso, & Toji.

Somehow I made Gojo's the longest??

cw: blood (obviously) period sex, All characters are 18+,

Satoru Gojo

Would probably get you chocolate to share 💗

We're talking about Gojo, so you know it means wayyyy more than you eat. If you are it all you'd probably get sick honestly. Somehow he doesn't though??

Would definitely take a picture in front of the feminine products and send it to you asking "What size pussy do you have?"

Somehow I think he has warm hands, instead of a heating pad he'd probably cuddle with you warming your stomach honestly.

Definitely bought ice cream.

Period sex would probably be a thing tbh (it's kinda half and half for me idk, could see it but at the same time maybe not)

Doesn't wanna leave you when it's the time of month.

If you leave the house and like to go buy groceries and eat something he'll walk behind you. Looking out for you know, blood in case if it seeps through the back or something. (He'd mostly do this for if you use pads instead yk)

I low-key see him knowing what a period is 🎀 because I mean 💗 yeah thinking about it. So you wouldn't have to really inform him.

Suguru Geto

Gosh it's hard to think URGHHH. 💔

Sighhh, honestly if we're talking about adult Suguru I think it's more off he'd know because of Mimiko and Nanako to so.

It gets BAD when all three of his girls get synced up.

He'll make sure to buy like dark chocolate, keep stocked up on pad (&/or) tampons.

Also makes sure we you're comfortable 💗

He'll buy the two heating pads and stuff you know

Meanwhile he'll buy you one for when he's out and about.

Otherwise he also holds his hand on your stomach.

Nanami Kento

Makes sure you're always comfortable.

Also like makes you some warm coffee/tea whichever you prefer.

Wants to help you through the hellish week.

He'll make sure to wash the sheets if you ever get blood on them accidentally.

Tries to keep you warm.

Bought you your favorite chocolate and gets whatever you're craving🎀

Toji Fushiguro

Bro's broke.

He can't buy pads/tampons, etc.

Honestly though hear me out, he'll take on a really quick job from Shiu and buy you some stuff.

Maybe some chocolate and a pack of pads/tampons.

He'll come back to you with it and then hand the bag to you.

After that he'll either hold you from behind, or his head on your stomach maybe.

Honestly there could be period sex, but he's noticeably not as rough, or anything.

Stays with you the entire time 💕

Ryomen Sukuna

Asshole.

But a nice asshole.

Would make Uraume go out to get your stuff.

Laying in bed, or sitting on his throne he'll put his massive ass hand on your stomach.

Makes sure no one bothers you much.

If you catch an "attitude" with him trust he'll fuck it out of you.

PERIOD SEX. He literally kills people, he is not going to be afraid of blood on his penis(es).

You mostly just stay around him during it (like you do even when you're not) that or you're in your room (his)

Choso Kamo

Scared the first time it happens. Like, "why are you bleeding?!?"

You'd have to explain the whole thing to the poor baby :(

He'll ask questions which you answer.

Later he'll come back to you with everything you need 💗

Doesn't wanna leave you.

Makes sure you have like a whole damn grocery of your pads/tampons.

Would probably get you some sweets.

(he asked Gojo to help him buy it.)

Lays his head on your stomach 🎀

#jjk x reader #getou suguru x reader #gojo satoru x reader #sukuna ryomen #jjk fluff #jjk headcanons #jjk #sukuna #jujutsu kaisen #jujustu kaisen #toji fushiguro #fushiguro toji x reader #choso kamo #choso kamo x reader #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento #satoru gojo #satoru gojo x reader

[whentherewerebicycles]

How is motherhood (so far)? It seems like such a crazy shift from one life to another!

it is SO good so far!!! here are some scattered feelings & thoughts:

i have been warned that a big hormone crash is coming and i am sure that will be tough to weather! but right now i am feeling so good - still just riding that endorphin high. i feel physically good too, like tired and a little sore, but really way better than i expected to feel three days after giving birth.

my transition into parenthood has been majorly eased by the fact that my mom is here and is doing virtually all of the newborn care tasks for me right now - nighttime feedings (i take over around 5am but my hands are so bad in the night), diaper changes, tracking how much he's eating, making food, etc. she is even helping me breastfeed because it involves a level of manual dexterity i am not currently capable of most of the time. i am so so so so so so grateful to have her here. part of me feels kind of guilty, like i'm probably supposed to be feeling way more stressed out and overwhelmed trying to manage the cognitive and physical demands of new parenthood, but i am trying to quiet that voice in my brain by reminding myself that there are going to be PLENTY of times in the future where i'll get to feel overwhelmed and exhausted and in over my head as a single parent. she is so happy and so excited to do this for me, and i am trying to just let myself rest and enjoy it.

it is so special to do this with my mom. i was saying to her yesterday, like, i can totally see how taking care of a new baby with a partner would be a richly meaningful experience, and i can see that there are things i am missing out on on that front. but also if i were doing this with a partner i wouldn't get to be doing this with my mom, and i would be missing out on an experience that i am finding just as richly meaningful and rewarding. i feel so close to her and i love her so much and i know that for the rest of my life i am going to remember how special it was to get to watch her love owen so much and take such good care of him (and me) in his first days of life. i feel so lucky. i thought i would feel SO overwhelmed but instead i just feel really loved and taken care of, and i feel really close to my mom, and i feel like we are the happiest little family unit right now. i love it so much. also she calls him "my little guy" and “my best friend” and i almost cry every time. hormones but also love, you know.

owen is perfect. i feel like i felt intensely close to him right after the birth, and then i had kind of a hard first day after in the hospital where there were just TOO MANY PEOPLE coming in at all hours and doing exams on me or on him, and there was no time to rest and bond with him, and i started feeling very overwhelmed and kinda like do i even KNOW this baby? this baby is a STRANGER to me and if i hadn't had a baby i would be at HOME right now in my own SPACE without anyone coming in every 15 min day and night to bother me. that first long hospital day was really rough and then i was relieved to finally get home that night but also super cranky and tired, and i couldn't figure out how to get my pump to work, and he got very fussy in the night and i was like AAAAAAA. but then we spent all of yesterday doing so much skin-to-skin cuddling and napping in bed which is just the nicest thing imaginable, and now i am like this is my BABY he is PERFECT look at him!!!! he is so snuggly and good.

i am glad that my brother had a newborn a couple months before i did because i think it helped prepare me for how gently boring the newborn stage can be lol. not in a bad way! it's so sweet and i think will involve lots of wonderful sleepy snuggling!! but they are awake so infrequently and do not have personalities yet, and you are kind of like hm. should more be happening, or...? but no. nothing more should be happening lol they will just be sweet sleepy lumps for a good long time. my nephew is nine? ten? weeks old now and is definitely starting to become way more alert/engaged, so i know a personality is coming haha and i will just enjoy my little sweet lump right now because he won't be like this ever again!! also it's nice to be able to just let him sleep next to me while i do other stuff. i think it will ease the transition a bit... like yes now we are on this endless cycle of pumping, attempting to breastfeed, bottlefeeding him, changing him, watching him sleep, pumping again, etc but i can read or watch stuff in between because he requires so little attention while sleeping (except for LOTS OF KISSES he requires LOTS OF LITTLE KISSES because he is so SWEET!!!!). also idk i am sure i will get bored of being off work but right now it has been so restful to delete outlook & teams from my phone and just be like who cares about weird office politics i have way more important things to do like kiss a sleeping baby on the forehead a hundred times and tell him he is the best and handsomest boy in the whole world. life is very good lol.

#baby tag

[shiny-jr]

Hellooo I found your work and have been binging it all and I saw that you didn't mind the feedback, so here goes

The retainer!mc felt too much like the YA book trope of 'edgy' Mc, like trying to show a cool and collected vibe but ends up like bella from twilight in a not so flattering way, the others felt like they did something or had the bases for the cast obsession on them to grow, this mc for me missed the mark, and I did felt like stopping mid read because I found them uninteresting, but all the others delivered for me so, I wanted to know how it ended

Also in a post you said about the retainer being important to vil, then shouldn't he show a threat or something to the new one? At least suspicion I guess, it felt to smooth for the MC unlike others

Anon, I saw this message not long after you sent it, but as mentioned in the last post, I got so busy I couldn't respond. But trust me when I say this: your words haunted me.

Don't worry, I'm not offended at all. I welcome the criticism, but goddamn this one... Look, usually when I get criticism, I nod, go "aight", and move on. I don't get offended when people critique my works. But yours legit made me clutch my heart? My pearls? Idk. I was baffled. That one kinda hurted, not gonna lie.

Let me tell you, I've been writing since about 2016. I like to think I have definitely improved. I've gotten countless messages and comments in the years since. Some good, some bad, most good, a few worse. However, I have never really cared in the sense where it stuck with me. But bro, when I tell you this felt like a slap in the face. A bucket of cold icy water being dumped on my head. Don't worry though. It was a probably well deserved metaphorical slap.

The point is, your words were at the back of my head for like a week. I actually discussed it with a mutual, and I think I figured it out. I wrote Pomefiore differently. Pomefiore is the sole result that just feels like its for the simps, probably because I was thinking of them the most when writing it. It was unintentional, I think, but that's the reason I came up with my mind.

Anyways, like I said, not at all offended. Just kinda an eye-opening comment, I suppose. I'm not really bothered if it's not your favorite, because a lot of other people seem to like it. And if there's one thing I learned after years of writing, is that you cannot win them all. No matter what you write, it won't appeal to everyone. That's literally impossible.

Okay, I digress, this has dragged on for too long, but I feel like I had to get that out there and share my response. Again, anon, thank you for your words! I appreciate it, even if it doesn't seem like it.

#shiny speaks #damnation twst au

[wanderingpen]

So about the new Dabi sketch

My dude's tongue is stitched??? That raises a whole lot of questions.

Can he remove his tongue? Does it fall out of his mouth when he talks too fast? Can he taste anything? Does he have to brush it separately and leave it in a glass of water like people with dentures have to do?

Has someone in the league ever just found half a tongue laying around and freaked the fuck out because holy shit a tongue, just how many people have dismembered body parts lying around?

Or maybe, because he's Dabi and Dabi's a diva, it's a tattoo so that his tongue matches the rest of him.

The people need answers, Hori. You can't just leave us this with no explanation. We crave the truth of the frankentongue.

#dabi #bnha #touya todoroki #my hero academia #penposts #tw tongue #I know some people are bothered by that kinda thing #just in case

[themoonking]

im all for making fun of and criticizing the way booktok (and booktube) aestheticize reading to an insane degree, making it more about being percieved as a reader more than like. actually reading. but some people on here lump the most normal things ever into the booktok consumerism pile?

like yes, booktok/tube places a lot of emphasis on the visuals of "reading", but then someone on here just went and said that simply "not wanting to damage your books" is a stupid booktok thing??? what? it's not vain or pretentious to care about your posessions, especially if they mean a lot to you. simply wanting your books to remain in good condition is not the same as having 100 unread books, or five editions of the same book, or books you hated, purely because they look nice.

and someone else said that having a yearly reading goal was also a stupid booktok/tube thing? since when? i've met people who set themselves yearly reading goals before youtube even existed. it's literally just a new years resolution, but tailored to a specific hobby?

#anti booktok #kinda went off in the tags lmao #like if you don't care about your books being a bit beat up and worn all power to you but its just insane to me #to say that NOT wanting your books to get worn means that you don't really care about reading?? what? #like for some people their most worn books are their most loved #but before i really got into reading if i had a beat up book its because i did not fucking care about it #and wouldn't bother if it got gnawed on by my dog or if it fell off the table into water #it's almost like we're all different and show our love and care for things in different ways? #'taking care of your things is stupid' is not the hot take you think it is bestie #and this person said in their post 'well i was always taught-' yea YOU were always taught #some people didn't grow up that way and weren't taught that idiot #similarly having special editions isn't the problem it's the overemphasis on having special editions #of books you didn't even enjoy #purely for the clout and the status that comes with owning a lot of special editions #wanting a pretty bookshelf isn't the problem you know some people just like it when their space is nice who knew #its when the bookshelf LOOKING nice supersedes literally anything else #like it doesn't matter if you enjoyed the book or if you read the book it just matters that it looks really nice on the shelf #something something nuance #vagueposting

[elevant39]

Narrative in ACZ

So this time I want to talk about the narrative in ACZ and why I personaly love it. So what I love about ACZ (and the reason why it´s my favourite in the main line series) is how it kinda works like a legend or a fairy tale. What I mean by this is that there is not a single "correct/canon" version of the game. This is possible because the gameplay isn´t actually taking place durring Belkan war. What we are playing is what Brett Thompson´s documentary thinks happened in it. The problem is that he doesn´t really have all the details. The closes he can get to them is Pixy, since he actually knew Cipher more personally and was with him the longest time, the only other people being Eagle Eye and PJ and.... yeah... But even then it´s been 10 years so most Aces will not remember everything. All that remains it´s their emotions and memories about Cipher and the effect that he had on them by shoting them down.

Even Pixy himself isn't really that reliable (It´s funny because he is also partly a narrator of the game with Thompson). Not only did he knew Cipher only up to Stage of Apocalypse, but Cipher literally changed his life by preventing him from launching V2 (and causing all the suffering that he later witnessed on the ground Zero). Cipher in a way saved Pixy, by stoping him from something he could never come back from. So I wouldn't be surprised if Pixy´s view of Cipher probably isn't completely objective. And this ties to Cipher and the Ace system. Cipher isn´t really a character. He is a perfect vessel for player, he is like a rorschach test. He is what ever we want him to be. And this is thanks to the Ace system and how it allows the player to roleplay Cipher how ever the player wants. Do you believe Cipher was a total merc?; Do you think that the Razgriz route is the one for you?; Or do you want a mercenary that becomes a knight but after Pixy´s betrail falls back to his merc ways?; Or maybe you like a knight that becomes merc and after a lot of retrospective after Pixy´s betrayal becomes a soldier? All of these and infinite more are possible. Which is why I kinda hate when some people in the fandom insist that there must be canon route. Because having one defined route would kinda kill all of this. Sure people might still talk about them, but why waste your time on all of these non-canon routes? When merc is totally canon because of AC5? Why try to analyse your story in your own route when the only that matters is the canon one? So why I am bringing this up? Becuase this (infinite interpretation) combine with complete erasure of who or what Cipher did is what makes ACZ acts almost like a legend of fairy tale. Because the only way Cipher can live on is throw the stories of others like Pixy and other Aces. But since it´s been so long nobody will ever trully know how it all went down. Simular thigs happens with fairy tales and legends like Cinderella, there isn´t one true story. In some versions the fairy godmother doesn´t even exist and she got her dresses from hazel nuts. In others there were 3 nights with balls that Cinderella went to. Sometimes she has help from all sotrs of animals others it´s just pigeons. Sometimes her step mother locks her up, other she is given the task to separate peace from ashes perfectly. But still there are some constants, because these constancs are what make it a tale of Cinderella. And same could be said about the Belkan war. Cipher and Pixy will always win in B7R. They will liberate Directus and destroy Excalibur. Pixy will always leave for AWWNB. PJ will always buy flowers for his girlfriends. And Cipher will always fight Pixy in the end. But everything else? We simply don´t know and more importantly can´t know. And that is what is so beautiful to me. Because then the interpretetion of the story and Cipher can be anything you personally believe. And the story doesn´t force you to one interpretation of it. But it encourages you to think about the story and why your version is the one that you like specifically. So yeah this is why I love this game so much and why it´s my favourite in the series. Thanks for reading.

#ace combat #ace combat zero #On another note I love how much the lyrics of Zero fit here #If you don't know they are the same as in Unsung war #and are about Razgriz #to me it´s funny how much the legend of Razgriz fits with Belkan war #again sorry for any grammar mistakes #I swear the only reason why I picked Cinderella is because it was the only fairy tale that was in my mind at the moment #I just hope my rambling is understandable #I kinda always liked arguing in games that do simular thing like Pathologic classic about why my version is the one I agree the most #So seeing how some people kinda push that there must be one canon route kinda bothers me

[monstriiss]

.

#gonna get kinda heavy in the tags since im stuck on mobile and cant drop a read more but i need to vent fam squad #god I want to come back but i just don't know how to talk #like i feel like i cant just spring back into conversation like everything is okay and fine #because its not and i dont know how to get over the mental barrier of talking about normal things #it's a really weird feeling and i know im isolating myself but i just dont know what else to do #like i can talk to my family that were there for it. i can talk to people that have been through it #idk i just feel really disconnected #my friends try to talk to me about things and i just cant relate anymore #and they dont get it either. none of my friends have lost their parents and especially havent seen someone die #and they dont know how to talk about it so now its like none of us bother #theres things that happened that i cant say and tbh im pretty haunted #to them its been ages since mum died but to me its only two weeks and still feels like yesterday #i think im pulling away just so i dont have to deal with the hurt of being dropped first #im glad that i have some good close friends that i CAN talk to about things and im so grateful for them #but hoooo boy everything hits different now #tiejfkeie boy am i glad i get to see my therapist tomorrow dkfjskfndk #;; ooc. #death tw #parent death tw #negative tw #;; tbd.

[sharkjumpers]

ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.

#okay ignore me sorry i dont want to bother anybody back to the classic using tumblr tags to ramble. Ok? #--------------------------------------------- #iiiii hate having ptsd. I am like 14 years old and i dont know how to be bigger. Ok? I do not know why i had to go and argue with my mother #when i have to see her every day . And deal with the consequences of arguing with her. I dont know how i used to do it but now i #am just sitting here being forced to interact with other people while on the constant brink of tears. #How am i supposed to do schoolwork when i have ptsd and just want to curl up in a ball on my bed aks style. Riddle me that #I dont know its just frustrating that I have to navigate normal things like school while getting blasted with some evil ptsd moment every #other day. something something i must just be a teeth hurt kinda guy. #They should be able to wrap me in FRAGILE DO NOT TOUCH paper without any questions asked you see. #Dont give me responsibilities i am straight up a little kid forever. one bad source of information #i will be okay i know this will pass but lord. #meowing #i dont know i just need to be held like a baby no questions asked for a while badly But i cant. Sad!

[stitchwraith-stingers]

is this not terrifying to anyone else???? geniually

(scource of images)

#calico.exe #anti ai #anti ai art #i just dont know the way people will just throw away education just to make it 'easier' cuz they didnt bother wanting to hire someone to #make an actual diagram #cuz why would you need to do that if you just wanna know actual diagrams of how the things work #what if this appears in actual books for students to use at some point? #i dont know this feels so distopian .... if ur gonna write something scientific atleast hire someone who will accuratly draw whatever you #want them to . christ sorry today i had a mental crisis about ai it kinda feels distopian but its not #PLEASE tell me i made sense in the tags

[voidimp]

probably couldve been diagnosed w hEDS a lot younger than twenty-fucking-eight if the foot doctor i went to in like middle/high school or my regular doctor had considered the possibility that the weak ligaments in my feet/ankles might be due to a connective tissue disorder that affects my whole fucking body instead of just being a localized thing

#like. the signs were there. oh my god were they there & we all brushed them off #like i get it!! ur a specialized doctor this is what u focus on but surely u should know some CAUSES of these things??? #''oh u just have weak ligaments in ur feet/ankles'' YEAH AND ALSO EVERYWHERE ELSE APPARENTLY #or like u know ud think maybe going back to my dr & being like ''yeah so this is what he said'' wouldve prompted some more questions #instead of just ''oh ok well good luck with that'' #I THOUGHT I WAS JUST FLEXIBLE BC I DID GYMNASTICS. NO. I WAS GOOD AT GYMNASTICS BC IM FUCKING HYPERMOBILE #anyway. idk where im going w this its just a thing i keep coming back to ever since i got that dx lmao #today it was bc i was wondering how my top surgery scars will be affected bc i didnt realize until then that the way i scar is Not Normal #(like i think theyll just be kinda puffy its not An Issue really but they wont be as smooth and flat as some peoples) #(like idc it doesnt Bother Me i was just thinkies abt it u know)

[the-ark-awaits]

it does kinda feel like everything im in is dead. all the roleplays, all the games, its all kinda. just nothing. idk it just kinda feels bad

#and i know logically why most of these things are dead #but like thats not stopping my brain from being like 'ok but actually its not cause of everyone including you being busy' #'its because everyone Secretly Fucking Hates You :)' and i like 'would you stfu you stupid pile of tapioca' #but yeah i do kinda feel like ive been really annoying folks lately between like some really insane interests lately #everyone kinda falling out of the shaed interest at once leaving the group kinda>???? #and like. every time a shared interest died so does the friendgroup but also like this friendgroup existed before the interest! it just #existed w/o me cause i was the added on member who kinda just kept tagging on and wouldnt fuck off #but i dont have like. any other friends atm so thats like. concerning? idk i feel really isolated lately #i wish i could contribute more to things but i just dont have the talents required most of the time and when i do i have some sort of #technical issue or time issue that prevents me from doing it #man idk i just wanna do things again but i dont wanna bother folks #and i wanna feel like im not bothering people when i focus on weird stuff cause like im deffo bothering people rn when i spam asks n shit #im deffo bothering people when im infodumping about 2b and radioactivity and tornados n shit too but like. man idk #maybe i should take a couple days maybe a week and like. kinda just do my own thing alone for a while #play some single player games n shit watch my documentary videos and not share weird facts from them

[awsteb]

i suppose get not liking jawn but uh. if you're like super into parx you realise they're choosing to be his friend right. this is like a slightly less extreme version of gerard way fans who despise lindsey

#i had no idea what anyone was talking about until today and none of them provided sources so i'm still kinda. eh. #by and large i do not know the ins and outs of his personal life nor do i want to. #even if new information comes up i'm just gonna do my thing and remember i'm not a twitter parxie who feels immense guilt every time they #like a guy who has iffy friends #parxies wouldn't survive a day in mcrblr #i just don't get where you people (who like parx and related bands) draw the line here #gerard has made music with jimmy euringer #otto is in a relationship with kinda gross stuff going on and a girlfriend with the worst judgement i've ever seen #i've heard shit about the madden brothers #awsten has done some stupid shit #pete wentz is. i'm not even going to bother to dissect all of that because i know i'm not a good source of information #idk i just find it odd that there's such a sudden large hullabaloo about this as if the scene hasn't been a mess the whole time #transmission📻

[queen-caramilflinda]

Saw your notes on that post about naddpod and just wanted to pass along that you can totally jump ahead and start with Shadowfell arc and only have a few little things that don't make 100% sense without context but aren't really too confusing or distracting from the arc. Thats actually how i started listening and it made me want to go back to the beginning and hear more about all the little things they mentioned from previous arcs. Its also good just straight from the beginning but if you dont want to wait like 60eps to get to the cool arc people rave about and listen to Brennan getting to finally be a PC you totally don't have to and it absolutely holds up to a re-listen when you go through from the beginning :)

Thank you! I will probably start from the beginning if only for the sake of simplicity and knowing where I am in the story. Honestly the things that have kept me from listening have just been lack of time and a difficulty with starting new pieces of media. I have a long trip next week though so I’m going to download the first few episodes to listen to on the commute!

Also I heard there’s an extended and insanely weird bit in the first episode and I need to find out what that’s about

#NADDPod #Cienna talks #I’ve listened to the ‘meet the characters’ thing a couple of times #and. Idk if this is an unpopular opinion or if it gets less intense as the episodes go on but Emily’s ‘crick’ accent… #I know that’s how some people in the south sound. and I adore Emily so much. but that accent kinda bothers me for some reason #as a southerner in the broadest sense of the word it may just hit too close to home lmao #I stopped listening to podcasts entirely last winter after going into a depressive episode/mental breakdown of sorts #I just couldn’t keep up with all the new stuff. and at somepoint in. i want to say mid January or February I just stopped listening to them #but I’m excited to get back into it

[love-fireflysong]

Well just got a call this morning letting me know that my application was approved, so you're girl is officially moving (again 😒) into her new apartment in three weeks!

Now to do all the other moving shit. Like hiring movers and buying boxes so I can pack all my shit up. Again.

God I hate moving so much 😭

#Gotta hire actual movers for a multitude of reasons #The most important ofwhich being 1) the fact that i cannot drive a vehicle and i need to get my shit there somehow #And 2) i have no friends that do not live in my computer and thus millions of miles away #And i kinda sorta need at least one more person so i can do basic things like lifting couches lol #And the two people i would ask for help kinda sorta moved to calgary so yeah i got nobody lol #That being said i sorta am excited to have a place all to myself #I can finally take all my nerdy shit out of my bedroom where i keep it hidden so i dont bother people into the rest of the place #Meaning that im gonna havr dragon shit absolutely everywhere muhahshaha #Plus with my roomies having moved out officially almost a week ago this place feels too big now and its kinda lonely #I know my cat is lonely at least #He has *never* been this affectionate #Hes pretty much forcing himself into my lap purring for cuddles every time i sit down #Starting to think i might have to get anothet cat once i move put so he has some company for the like 10+ hours im not home almost everyday

[solradguy]

I came to terms with the Sol kinnie thing months ago now because honestly who gives a shit, but every now and then I'll find myself in a situation where I wonder if whatever it was I was about to do was/is a pre- or post-Guilty Gear interest lol

#textpost #Most of them have been pre-Guilty Gear interests which is honestly hilarious #Like of course I don't have proof for most of it but my fursona is the funniest one #He's basically bootleg furry Sol Badguy BUT he was like that MONTHS before I got into GG #I've been thinking about this over the last few days though #Because I was doing some Queen stuff and had a thought like 'am I only doing this because my brain's weird or do I actually care' #And went through like a checklist of things. I do actually care #Sol is like frighteningly relatable though and sometimes I wish he wasn't lol #I typed this at 2am last night but saved it to my drafts instead of publishing it haha Still kinda feeling it this morning though tbh #I wish I could better articulate or find a term that describes how I relate to Sol better because 'kin/fictionkin' feels too... #Hmm.... Psycho-religious? A lot of essays I read while initially figuring this out related the kin tag to something more like a- #-Philosophy or something similar to a religion #But for me it's more like my brain filling in empty spaces within itself because No One was like me growing up and #now that I'm also trans there are even LESS people who are like me #So my brain sees a character that's similar to me and is like 'oh holy shit it's us. Let's be like that' hahah #This got really long I should've put it up in the post sorry lmfao #Anyway this is something I've done my whole life and 'kinning' is really the only term that fits what it is even if it's not a 1:1 fit #It usually doesn't bother me but knowing that some of the things I enjoy now I probably won't later once my interests shift again does #I still keep waiting for it to happen with Guilty Gear but GG is so different from anything else I've been into I'm not sure it will #Since most of the things I like about GG were things I liked before getting into it. Like heavy metal & weird scifi/fantasy #I'm not going to elaborate on how exactly I relate to Sol also. My blog is too public for that #and this post is already a little too personal #kin tag