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#I don't do this very much but I love his art and it makes me so happy to see his comms open for the first (official) time!
greenandsorrow · 19 hours
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the price for misbehaving (ii)
post rut Alastor x gn!reader
WARNINGS; the aftermath of a very horny fic, mentions of deer mating season, friends to lovers, deer/doe!demon!reader, reader with self worth doubts, a sprinkle of angst, curly-haired!Alastor, undertones of Alastor being a momma's boy, mentions of his past, making out, fluff (literally), plot
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Dividers by; @saradika-graphics & @cafekitsune
Please do not repost or directly copy my work and don't use it on AI platforms either.❤️
From a smutty oneshot to a multi chap fic. Nothing can compare to the chunkiness of the 1st chapter, but I'm satisfied with this one as well. Enjoy you lovely beings and thanks for being patient with me!!! The art above is by @kalico-of-doom.
~masterpost~
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The only time Alastor isn't smiling is when he's sleeping you have come to realize. You can't help but notice how tired he looks as you lay motionless beside him. You start petting his ears and he groans softly, nuzzling deeper into your touch without even bothering to open his eyes. A small smile forms on his mouth, a real one. Is this really the same man that has been fucking you until your legs stop working?
In the morning you wake up in his bed, a daily occurrence at this point. However, you weren't expecting him to be staring deeply into your contemned soul.
"A- Al?"
Your voice is hoarse from sleep. You scratch your deer ears, flop on your back and stretch. Alastor keeps staring, studying you and every micro expression you make.
You can feel fear creeping into your gut. Is this the end? Is the rutting season gone? Does he want to kill you and eat you now? Will he kick you out? One thing is certain.
He doesn't need you anymore.
After all, you were just a friend helping him go through a difficult time. Nothing more. Still, you would be lying to yourself if you said that you haven't caught any feelings. From his forceful claiming that hid a great deal of desperation to his tender claiming last night, Alastor has left more than just his mark on you. One could say that he owns you in the most primal and raw of ways, but if he chooses to deny that... that's all it takes really, then you were nothing but a fucktoy.
"Um... I- I'm gonna take a shower"
Is that you doing the walk of shame? Alastor is a gentleman, why isn't he saying anything?! Not a single thing that could make you feel less terrible about the whole situation!
Now that his hormones have died down and you are far from aroused as well, getting out of bed and standing completely naked in front of him... It makes you feel exposed, vulnerable, small and inferior to him.
This new emotion, the deep embarrassment that has your face feeling hot and your stomach to churn with anxiety makes you dress up and leave "your friend's" room in the speed of light.
You lock yourself in your much smaller room, preparing a bubble bath for your spent and tired body. You smile to yourself a little, remembering how Charlie had made sure you'd have your own bathtub so that you can read your books while soaking in the warm water.
Sinking in the water, having it envelope you, cleanse your energy and take his scent off of you feels nice. You let your eyes droop until they close lazily, you allow your shoulders to relax, your jaw to unclench. A long and audible sigh. Your hands around your frame.
You start crying.
If another deer demon resided in the hotel, he might as well had spent his breeding season with them. You weren't special. The mere thought of such a thing is killing you. You were just another victim of the radio demon's manipulation.
Still, it's your fault as well. For believing this was more than what it appeared to be? Maybe. You are getting more and more confused by the minute.
But oh the way he had been repeating your name like a prayer... It must mean something to him, you being there for him that is. You didn't even judge the way he had spilled tears of sexual frustration when handjobs weren't enough to relieve the ache in his loins.
Who else has seen Alastor Hartfelt of pride under this light? No one. You are the only exception. He wouldn't have allowed you to get so close to him if he didn't trust you.
As your thoughts keep overlapping and fighting with each other and you continue to cry softly, you peak up the all too familiar sound of static.
Another unfair thing! He can melt into shadow and go anywhere he pleases... The sound intensifies as he approaches... you? Is he really thinking of invading your space like that? You can't even cry and be miserable at peace! Not like you're in Hell.
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"Bonjou! Konmen s'apé kouri? Huh?"
Not only are you not in the mood to ask him to translate what he just said, but Alastor literally spawned in your bathroom and he's now acting like this is okay to do. The way he's readjusting his lapels and smiles smugly like he wasn't a grunting mess last night infuriates you even further.
"Can you please get the fuck out of here?"
"Mh?" he just stands there in his usual apathy. He's even holding his cane.
"Can you at least stop smiling for a second?"
"Oh ho! I'm afraid I can't do that my dear!"
"But you can definitely get your ass out of my room! I-" The sound of your voice carries to your ears like a child whining. There's a lump in your throat that you're beginning to fear you won't be able to keep down for much longer. If your face and hair weren't already wet from the bath, then it would be crystal clear that you were weeping like an idiot before he suit himself in.
Alastor is quick to gauge your body language. You're hugging your knees, shielding your naked body from him. Sometimes you swear he can tell your emotional state by sniffing the air around you. It's like your scent is enough for him to piece together the puzzle you are. The radio demon scranches his nose.
"What's there to be so sad over y/n? Today is a beautiful day!"
Is he playing stupid?! Because if he's doing this on purpose... Well, there's not much you can do now that he doesn't need you anymore.
Your lower lip trembles at this terrible thought and the lump in your throat escapes your notice, resulting in a broken and weak sob to come out of you.
Tilting his head to the side way more than necessary and squinting his eyes, Alastor asks "Are you pregnant?"
You freeze and widen your eyes. "I- Is that even... even fuckin' possible in the afterlife?"
The fucker chuckles!
"Oh I don't think so, at least not for lowly demons such as yourself!" The worst part is that he wasn't trying to insult you by saying that, but rather calm you down.
"Go to Hell."
"Ironic."
You can't help it now. You break down in tears. Your chest feels tight as the sobs ripple through your body and make your frame retreat to itself. In addition to your general misery, the water has gone cold, causing you to shiver.
The overlord places his cane against the tiles of the wall and crouches down so he is eye-level with you. He won't let it show just yet, but Alastor is very worried. There's a guilt eating him from the inside.
While he was in heat, in breeding mode, or whatever you wanna call it, he wasn't fully aware of his actions. Alastor's mind was blurred from the desire to mate and basically reproduce. Now that he's back to his senses, he has come to the unpleasant realisation that he might have caused you harm in the process of letting out his passion.
And this simply won't do! This deer demon has done cruel and vile things that he doesn't particularly feel bad about, but hurting you... He would never be able to forgive himself.
You were there for him and showed him a great deal of love and understanding.
So, that's the reason you left so hurriedly from his quarters... He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. He hurt you. HE DID IT TO YOU.
Alastor's permanent grin fades just slightly. It is replaced by concern, evident in the way he looks at your trembling body in the water. He reaches out to gently touch your skin, checking for any signs of pain or discomfort. Your friend's voice softens, it's now filled with genuine worry and regret.
"I'm so sorry darling... I didn't know I caused you... pain."
It's true that you have many bruises and hickeys decorating various places on your body, but that's not the reason behind your breakdown.
"I- It's not th-" you just look down. You can't even explain yourself.
The radio demon's worry deepens after your vague response and he quickly takes action to be by your side, pulling you out of the bathtub and into a tight hug. Alastor whispers reassurances in your ear, his voice filled with remorse.
"I'm so sorry... We should have stopped when it got too much."
No one has heard Alastor apologize before, not even God, for all that's worth.
His expression softens even further as he sees your tears that just keep coming. He carefully brushes them away, worry etched into every line of his handsome face.
"I didn't mean to make you cry. You must know that."
"I'm not in pain... Just sad."
You do look rather devastated.
Alastor is almost frozen in place from all the guilt since he can now see the bruises forming on your skin. The water camouflaged them, but now they are exposed for him to observe and take in.
He swallows hard, his voice shaking with emotion like never before. "Y/n... I didn't mean to do that. I didn't. None of it."
"None of it?"
Your voice is muffled due to how you have hid your face in his chest. At least he's warm.
"My intention wasn't to cause you injury or physical pain."
You look up at him, finally making eye contact. He's looking at you as well, eyes shining with regret, guilt and what appears to be shame.
What really surprises you though, is the pleading tone of his voice. It's one thing to be vulnerable because he's hungry for sexual contact and another because he genuinely cares for you.
"Can you ever forgive me for this? I promise, it was never my true intention. I just... I got carried away. And now... It's not an excuse..."
"You really meant none of it to happen between us?"
"Now now little deer! Someone's getting ahead of themselves! That's not what I implied at all."
You sigh and settle in his lap.
"Oh mon cher, did you really think I regret our... stimulating times?"
Alastor's long arms press you against him, his clothes absorbing the water on your still bare skin. He then peaks you up bridal style and carries you to your bed. It's not king sized like his but he doesn't seem to care for such detail right now.
"Now let me see you."
"I said I'm fine!"
"The artist will be the evaluator of his work."
"No Al! Artists get critics to evaluate their work."
"Hmmm, did you say something dear? Cause I didn't hear you!"
It's a common tactic of his to hide his real feelings by being chatty and pleasant. You of course know that, but in your current state it's very validating to have him take care of you.
So he did care. And he still does after having stopped necessarily needing you.
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Alastor isn't joking around. He's searching your body, subconsciously writing down every scratch, every bruise and hickey, every bite mark.
Ears alert on top of his head, eyes wide open. He can even make out the shape of his fingertips on your hips... He turns you on your stomach only to discover his whole palms are imprinted on your buttocks. Meanwhile, you just allow him to inspect your body for as long as he wishes. All the crying has left you drained but also tranquil and calm.
"I'm fine Al. Really."
"Shhh, I'm not done evaluating the damage."
"It's just a bite or two."
"I drew so much blood..."
"Yes and?"
He just keeps observing, keeps rolling you this way and that. The scratches and the bruises are the most triggering to him. They remind Alastor of unhappy memories, in the days when he still hadn't taken good care of his father. As long as he hasn't permanently marked you it should be fine.
"I'll ask Niffty for some ice."
"N- no... Can we just... sit here? Like... cuddle?"
"You were my solace."
"What-"
He gently presses a finger on your lips to shush you.
"Thank you."
"You don't have to say that. It's not like I helped you with a flat tire or something."
"I don't do cuddling."
"Nor touching for that matter. But... It's not that bad, huh? Just let me put something on first."
You stand up and go to your closet to pick something to put on. Your hair is still wet and your legs still feel sore from all of your intense moments, but it was a relief to know he still wants you in his life after the rut has ended.
Alastor's behaviour makes you wonder. He's contradictory. From fucking your throat in his radio station, to bending you over various objects in the hotel, taking you in missionary, against walls, windows and doors, he still seems pretty reluctant to give himself to intimacy. Unlike those times, his mind is now clear, no overwhelming heat involved. Intimacy -to him- equals vulnerability and vulnerability equals pain. The inevitable way in which things had worked out in his life.
"But we did sleep together until yesterday."
The radio demon cannot deny you. He's already sat at the edge of your bed, taking off his coat, shoes and anything else that could make the experience any less enjoyable.
"I wish I could say you'll take this to your grave."
You grin brightly and chuckle at his silly, little remark. Your confidence has been restored to an extent after he made it clear that he does concern himself with your wellbeing.
"But why do you not like being touched? Physical contact is a form of affection."
"Or a form of punishment, of intimidation, domination and... many other vile things my dear..." His voice is too low for your liking as he says that. You don't know what burdens Alastor's shoulders, but it can't be good. And I'm not even referring to his own cruelty and the pain he has inflicted on others. Maybe his opinion of physical contact is connected to the endless scars on his body.
"Oh well whatevs Al. I just want my cuddles."
The way his ears are pulled back and he looks at you almost like he's a shy and innocent boy makes your heart bit faster. At least there's no velvet rubbing off his antlers this time.
Alastor is extremely gentle and cautious in the way he handles you now. He lays down on his back and you use his chest as a pillow. It's a cozy place. His chest. He has some fluff there, just like Angel Dust, but unlike the former he hides it under layers of clothing and keeps it unstyled. Still, it's undoubtedly soft and fuzzy and you like to sink your hand in it or swirl the soft hairs around your fingertips. The radio demon isn't complaining as one might expect, it's soothing to have someone touch his body in a non-hostile manner. It's refreshing to have someone appreciate his body as it is.
Would you also appreciate it if you saw him as he once was?
His father hadn't. He could handle the child of a mixed marriage, but Alastor wasn't just mixed, but also looked the part and according to the racist beliefs of his father in the 1900's that was a bad thing.
As you're nuzzling against his long and elegant neck, your friend's mind wanders. You lived during the 90's. What would it have been like if he had also lived during that period? Everything would have been different. The town he grew up in, his relationship with his parents, his career as a radio host and a serial killer.
"Did you know that my hair is naturally curly?"
Your ears perk up at that and Alastor gently takes hold of them and pulls at them from the root, just slightly.
"That feels nice..."
"Oh I know."
"What were you saying?"
"Oh yes, my hair's curly! Since I was nothing but a tiny, adorable baby boy! ...my mother... she..." His hand lets go of your ears and you can feel the rise and fall of his chest as he takes a deep breath and lets it out in a long sigh.
There's a melancholy about him now and you feel the need to comfort him. He's opening up to you by being genuine and vulnerable. Alastor is sharing a part of who he used to be and the least you can do is listen. You resume your activities on his fluff, almost massaging the area. He seems to like it, for a moment closing his eyes and letting a sound like purring.
"Can you keep this up?"
"Sure Al."
"Merci. What was I saying...? Oh yes of course! Mama and my curly mop."
The radio effect of his voice and his arms around you make you feel like you're a kid being told a bedtime story. It's a good thing the other residents have gotten used to you and Alastor disappearing together for long periods of time. His soft chest fluff under the pads of your fingers only intensifies the feeling of being told a story while tucked in bed, warm and safe from the outside world.
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"It's truly amazing how much power is given to hair in certain cultures. In my culture, dear y/n, hair texture served as an indicator of social status. My family -a wedding between a white man and a creole woman of colour... oh ho dear! It was something else back then...-
As a kid, I was always the one teased for having “weird hair”, as if it didn’t match my other facial features. When school began, my sweet mama, she... she would put my hair in locs to protect the curls. Apparently they didn't like that at school! So my father... he radio static intensifies he made my mother shave it. He claimed that if my mother and I wore our hair differently then no one would take us seriously."
You take a moment to digest this new piece information. It's true that locs enclose the natural hair and help it stay intact. It's also true that Alastor grew up in a time when it was very difficult to be of a cultural background which was different to the majority's. You choose to not comment on anything, that's not your job.
You swirl some more of his fluff around your fingertips before moving your hand to his hair.
"Well, it's not curly in the afterlife."
You feel the vibration of his chuckle through your check that is resting on his chest.
"But it is!"
Alastor lets out a satisfied sound as he presses you even tighter against him and begins rumbling about his hair care routine. He uses anti frizz oils, heat protection oils and then blow dries it. Truth is, that's just the steps you managed to actually register in your brain, because a sleepiness started overtaking you as you stayed laying in his embrace.
You're now fading between consciousness and unconsciousness. It almost feels like you're floating. Is this what Heaven is like?
Maybe it is. Maybe it is not. But you did manage to find your little oasis in Hell. And so did he.
Alastor looks down at your much smaller frame curled up against him. Your breath has slowed down and your eyes are closing. Why does it feel so warm and soft to have you close to him like this? He knows he shouldn't be letting his guard down, but he can't help it when it comes to you. The radio demon is enamoured with you.
Wanting to make the experience even cozier and dreamier for his favourite sinner, Alastor starts singing quietly. His sense of rhythm is immaculate and his jazzy tunes make you fall sound asleep in no time whatsoever.
When you wake up an hour or so later, he still hasn't moved, but he acknowledges that you're awake with a small hum.
"Oh wakey wakey my darling y/n!" had been his usual response to you waking up while he was in the rut. However, right now he appears to be much more unguarded and raw than his usual persona. You haven't even completely woken up and you're already wondering about this new side of him.
"Al? Is everything okay?"
"Oh why yes it is, but there's this thought occupying my brilliant mind..."
"Care to share it with my not so brilliant one?"
You expected him to laugh or even chuckle but Alastor goes straight to the point. "All this... making love and we still haven't kissed. Not really."
Kissing him would mean that you actually view him romantically and that whatever "friends with benefits" situation you had going on will get destroyed. That's not a bad thing though. Despite your initial fears of your fellow deer demon being too emotionally unavailable and only needing you to calm down the torment of his lust, a kiss wouldn't hurt. Kisses are good.
"We can change that y'know."
You make the first step by leaning towards him, basically giving him the green light that you're consenting to this. Alastor notices it and loses no time, pressing his lips against yours while wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close into another embrace. He smiles widely as you kiss, his head tilting slightly as he runs his fingers through your hair. After a few seconds pass, he pulls his head back, slowly breaking the kiss as he looks into your eyes with a broad smile on his face.
"Aren't you delightful?!" and he dives back in.
Alastor's second kiss with you is firm and passionate, but not overly aggressive. His lips are very warm and he seems to enjoy the intimacy of taking his time to explore your mouth. As the kiss progresses, he gradually increases the pressure of his lips on yours. His arms wrap around your waist and his tongue slowly wanders further into the welcoming heat of your mouth.
Once again -just like when it came to sex- you have come to the conclusion that Alastor isn't that experienced, but some raw power, an instinct if you will, provides him with the ability to do all the right moves at the right time.
And then you just break character. You burst into laughter. His large and pointed ears twitch at that change of pace.
"When I thought I was doing a good job-"
"Oh no, that's not it at all. I'm just happy." You're giddy and so he is.
Maybe not needing you but actually wanting you isn't the worst case scenario.
To be continued.
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sysig · 24 hours
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Wuh oh (Patreon)
Bonus:
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The novel experience of being crushed by a giant rock, a visual metaphor
#Doodles#ISaT#Siffrin#Loop#Yaaaay suffering <3 <3 <3#Lol#Starting with a cute practice Sif to get used to drawing them a bit more they're so cute what the heck#He's so shaped I love that for him and about him#Crisp design very nice#Sif really is the embodiment of ''Ignorance is bliss'' and being so maladjusted about it :'D#His memory issues make the me a sad#Ironically I try not to think about it too hard or else I'll get Really sad lol#Memory is the foundation of individual personhood! It's such a tragedy weh#Him brushing things off by falling back into his issues is just so agh Sif no you deserve better!#Some sillies lol I never know if I should give content warnings for these kinds of jokes - I don't make them often!#Loop's line in the Jello streams is So good I couldn't not lol#Happy Wednesday fr btw lol yes I did do that on purpose#The last one agh the red and like - can we talk about Sif (and Loop's and Odile's) specific portraits where their hands do the spark thing??#I always forget how art can be Whatever and that overlapping/removing lineart to imply shapes and movement and just jfdslafd#It's so cool I love it so much it's very inspiring#The bonus is mostly a joke lol - again while watching the Jello streams Lenti was talking about how much she relates to Sif#And I was privately like ''Haha thank goodness I don't relate to him! Couldn't be me!'' And Then#It's fine lol I'm aware of my overlapping issues - I fall more on the Isa side of ''Sounds fake but okay'' but yeah.....yeahhhh lol#As long as I don't get trapped in a time loop about it! Poor Sif haha
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yawnderu · 2 days
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>Commission for the lovely @slava-the-stalker! Thank you so much for supporting me with comms for my surgery. TTwTT 💗💗
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John stared deep into the mirror, his visage scrunched up in a mix of discomfort and insecurity upon seeing his own reflection. What used to be a normal human face is nothing like the... thing staring back at him, his own hands coming up to caress the rough, scarred skin. While he's glad the bastard who failed all those ghouls is no longer recognizable, part of him feels a growing pit of anxiety boiling up in his stomach, threatening to explode at any moment now, the sound of your gentle humming coming from the bedroom calming him down even if only for a second. 
With one last look of disdain at his own face, he makes his way out of the bathroom, his chest lightly puffed out in fake confidence, not wanting you to sense the inner turmoil in his head. The pure devotion in your eyes makes him hesitate, yet he pushes himself to be closer, lying down next to your body, one of his cold hands running up and down the crevice of your waist. 
“Took you long enough.” The pure mirth in your eyes makes the corners of his lips tilt up into a smile despite himself, fighting the urge to recoil back the moment your hand meets his cheek, the warmth spreading all over his cold skin, bringing a sense of comfort amidst the chaos in his head. 
“Looking this good ain't easy.” That fake confidence will be his demise one day, he knows it, yet the sweet laugh leaving your lips is enough to push the thought to the back of his mind, his eyes closing at the sensation of your thumb caressing his skin with nothing short of worship. He can feel you inching closer, not doing a damn thing to stop you as your lips crash against his, moving at an almost agonizingly slow pace, your breath hot against his face. 
His hand drifts lower and lower as your kiss becomes more heated, cold fingers curling around your supple ass, squeezing it harshly as he pulls you closer to him, all the blood rushing down to his cock the moment your tongue enters his parted lips, wrapping around him without any trace of disgust. Your free hand comes down to his groin, teasingly tracing the outline of his hardening cock with your index before fully cupping it, feeling the vibrations of a groan leaving his lips against your own. 
You can feel him harden beneath your palm, your fingers curling around the outline of his cock as your warm tongue meets his, battling for a dominance that he instantly surrenders, the feeling of his hands groping your ass harder dragging a moan out of your lips, only breaking away from the kiss to lean your forehead against his. 
“I have been having slightly more impure thoughts than usual.” He confesses, his voice barely a whisper as a hint of hesitation dances in his dark eyes. 
“Maybe it's time we... act on those.” His nervous chuckle doesn't go ignored, only making the tenderness in your eyes grow at the slight display of nervousness written all over his face. You've heard his thoughts about your relationship— about how he thinks you don't want to wake up to his mug every morning, and how he would never wish that on anyone he cared for; yet for you, John Hancock is a work of art. Every single intricate pattern on his skin, the way he carries himself, the strong sense of responsibility and morality towards his cause, and the sheer kindness seeping through his entire soul, clear in his very own actions. 
The only response he gets is a soft peck on the lips, your gentle eyes meeting his, serving as a soothing balm for the insecurities that run deep within. He allows his body to relax despite the way his muscles are threatening to tense at the sensation of your fingers unbuttoning his pants, his hand instinctively reaching out to hold yours the moment your fingers touch his zipper. 
“You don't... have to.” He reassures, not wanting you to feel forced to look at his disfigured, ghoul body. 
“I want to.” Your tone is even and firm, your intentions clear as day, yet he only moves his hand away after seeing the way your pupils dilate when looking up at him. John has been alone for what feels like an eternity, the idea of being intimate with someone he loves being such a foreign and mildly scary concept even for the bravest of men. 
He forces his body to relax, laying down on his back as you undo his zipper, a sharp hiss leaving his thin lips the moment your warm hands pull his hard cock out, blown pupils fully admiring every single detail; the thick, darker veins running over his length, to the dark pink bulbous tip, glistening with precum that seems to leak like a broken faucet. A deep groan leaves his lips as your fingers curl around his thick length, moving up and down at such an agonizingly slow pace that he's close to throwing his pride away and begging. 
His lips part, half-lidded eyes staring up at the ceiling as his jaw clenches, feeling the mattress sink with the weight of your knees, parting his legs just enough for your body to fit between them. Your tongue darts out, licking a tantalizing stripe over his sensitive tip, running over his thin slit, the taste of salty precum overwhelming your senses, mixing in with your slimy saliva. His hand goes to the back of your head, cold fingers caressing your scalp rather than pushing you closer, his grip tightening momentarily the moment your warm tongue runs up and down the thickest vein on his shaft. 
“Please, love...” He's not even sure why he's pleading, yet surrendering all control to the person he loves the most brings out an exhilarating feeling he never knew was possible without drugs. You obey, slowly pushing his throbbing cock deeper into your mouth, relaxing your throat just to take him deeper without triggering your gag reflex. The tears dotting your eyelashes only make you look even more charming to him, lightly bucking his hips so you can finish taking all of him, your nose against his trimmed pubic hair, the feeling of his soft, heavy balls against your chin only makes it more enticing, sucking in your cheeks as you start to bob your head up and down, taking in the feeling of his cock sliding down your throat. 
His grip tightens on your hair, inhibitions thrown out the window as he stars to guide your movements, his eyes darkening at the way every single inch of his cock disappears into your needy, willing throat, squelching sounds mixing in with his deep groans, his head thrown back, the way his Adam's apple bobs up and down fully on display for your curious eyes. Your hands squeeze his thighs once you're unable to get air anymore and he immediately helps you pull away, gently wiping the trail of saliva going down the corners of your lips, using the chance to cup your cheek and stare down at you with nothing but pure, undying love. 
“I'd like to try something new tonight.” His face tilts to the side slightly, curiosity clear in his expression, resting his heavy body on his elbows as his dark eyes focus on the way you seductively strip of your clothes, layer after layer coming off to reveal the soft, untainted flesh, so unlike his own— so pure and clean. 
His gaze follows your movements, instinctively fitting his body on top of yours the moment you lay down on your back, one hand supporting his weight, and the other one drifting down your plush thigh, roaming up and down as if it's the first time he feels something so tender, forever enamored with the way your body feels against his no matter how many times you make love. 
His fingers drift down to your sopping cunt, swiftly running over your erect clit for a second before he's back to gathering your slick on his fingers, teasing your entrance before going up, rubbing circles over your clit, the way your back arches and your tits jiggle slightly simply makes his cock throb, lowering his hand to grip it, rubbing himself up and down a few times before guiding his thick tip to your entrance, starting to push in. Your hand on his bicep forces him to halt his movements, shooting you a curious, worried look. 
“Not... not that hole.” It only takes a second for your words to register, amusement clear in his face, yet a speck of doubt manages to always crawl its way into his brain. Do you truly want a bastard like him to defile you? Your legs parting to give him more space, not a single hint of hesitation in the way you move, presenting yourself to him.
Perhaps it's about time John allows himself to be selfish— to take what's being offered to him. His grip tightens on his cock, rubbing the tip up and down your sopping pussy, gathering as much slick as he can around the tip, knowing you're going to be a tight fit. 
“Say the word if y'want me to stop.” Your little nod is all he needs, relaxing your lower body as he applies pressure against your tight, puckered hole, feeling it give in and wrap tightly around the tip of his cock, a small groan leaving his lips at the sensation. He sinks into you slowly and carefully, a loud sigh escaping him the moment he managed to bottom out, yet his eyes never once leave your face, his hand coming up to cup your cheek and caress the tender skin with his thumb, giving you as much time as you need to get used to the foreign sensation. 
“You can move now.” The sweetness of your words makes his lips curl up into a sincere smile, his hips rocking into you slowly, feeling your tight hole grip him like a vice, the warmth surrounding him is almost enough to make him cum, yet he focuses solely on your pleasure, his thin lips coming down to kiss your neck, licking a tantalizing stripe over the sensitive skin just to feel your body shudder at the sensation, your hands coming up to caress his back, pulling his body so close that your heat is spreading all over, touching his very own soul. 
“I love this...” His tongue applies more pressure to your neck as you drag out your words, taking full advantage of the sensitive nerves just to feel your throat vibrating against hips lips with each sweet moan that comes out of your lips, daring to fuck into you deeper and harder now that you're used to his size. 
“I love you.” His hips falter for a second, unable to hide the surprise dancing in his slightly widened eyes at your confession, yet the look of love and trust written all over your face drags away any disbelief he felt, his soul freed even if only for a moment as your face finds shelter on the crook of his neck the moment his thrusts speed up, fucking into your tight ass at an almost unlawful pace, wanting you to feel every single inch of his hard cock, of his love. 
A loud groan escapes his lips the moment he feels your teeth bite into his shoulder, likely trying to muffle your crescendo moans, the stinging sensation making his cock throb, slamming himself as deep as he can into your puckered hole, his body weight keeping you pressed down as ropes of thick, hot cum shoot deep into you, painting your tight walls white. His heavy body rests on top of yours, too exhausted to move out of the way yet, the sensation of being lightly crushed oddly pleasant. 
“I love you too. More than anything, more than anyone...” He whispers into your ear, slowly pulling out of you, his dark eyes taking a few seconds to admire his work of art— your gaping hole leaking with his hot, white cum, a thin layer of sweat covering your exhausted, fucked-out body. He lays down next to you, his arms wrapping around your waist just to bring you closer, planting a gentle kiss on top of your forehead. 
His eyes drift down to the red teeth marks on his shoulder, letting out a small chuckle at the idea of having a future bruise as a reminder of your night together.
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misc-obeyme · 2 days
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Ah, you want lucifer sub? I have another idea for you then! Feel free to ignore if you had enough nsfw drabbles tho lol Theres a card in NB where lucifer tries to force mc a truth apple or whatchamacallit to see who mc really is, but Beel ended up eating it instead. Anyway in p4 he tries to earn mc's forgiveness by going to the castle for barb's cooking. What if then, at the table, mc remembers that in the og timeline, lucifer and mc constantly played with shibari on each other? Hmm... So then, that's his punishment. Early Avatar of Pride, getting tied up in his own room. Blindfolded Anyway, hope you like the idea. 🍄 Love you CC
Augh, 🍄 anon, shibari is like one of my favorite things ever. It just looks so pretty!?!? And Lucifer is also very pretty????
Yes, I thoroughly enjoyed writing this. I do have that card and remembered this particular Devilgram. It had an excellent line from Barb that I took the time to screenshot and then forgot about until much later. Something about having cake, I don't remember exactly. It's in my posts somewhere lol.
Anyway! Sub!Lucifer is everything to me, so here he is. I like the idea of NB Lucifer specifically not understanding why he trusts MC. He even says in the Devilgram something about how there was a connection between them the moment MC showed up. But this is a minor detail, I just find it interesting.
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GN!MC x Lucifer
NSFW MDNI
Warnings: sub!Lucifer, dom!MC, shibari, blindfold, praise, hand job
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Lucifer held himself incredibly still. He would not squirm. He would not give you the satisfaction.
It was difficult. He wanted to give in already.
You had spent quite some time carefully tying the black and red ropes around his body. Securing knots, ensuring they were tight but not too tight. Perhaps he should have been anxious as you brought his hands behind his back and tied them in place. Perhaps he should have been concerned when you tied the blindfold over his eyes. Perhaps he should have been worried about how vulnerable he was allowing himself to be with you.
And perhaps he was all of those things. But the fire it ignited in his belly was too powerful to ignore. The thrill of your touch, the way his skin tingled any time you brushed your fingers against it. Knowing that you were seeing him completely exposed, that he was entirely at your mercy, that you were in control of him in a way no one else has ever been.
The ropes rubbed against him, an uncomfortably pleasing sensation. The blindfold was his own tie, which you had utilized for this purpose and its soft silkiness was an exciting contrast to the harsher feeling of the ropes.
When you were finished, you moved away and left him there.
Lucifer was kneeling on his own bed, tied up and blindfolded, waiting for you to touch him again.
He couldn't see himself, but he could imagine the sight. You seemed to already know the intricacies of shibari. The pattern was elegant and complex - turning him into a sensual work of art.
Lucifer waited. He could be patient. He refused to let you see just how affected he was. He couldn't do anything about his obvious erection, which was straining. But he would keep the rest of himself as composed as possible.
"So," you said and your voice was close. "Are you sorry for trying to get me to eat that apple?"
Lucifer hesitated. "I've let you tie me up and blindfold me, haven't I? Is that not proof enough?"
"I won't make you say it," you said. "I could see it in your eyes as I was tying you up. You trust me, don't you? Despite being suspicious of who I am and what my motives might be, you still trust me."
Lucifer frowned. "I don't-"
You pressed a finger to his lips. "You don't need to lie about it. You can trust me, Lucifer. I promise."
Lucifer was about to disagree with you, but whatever he might have said left his mind immediately as you took his cock in your hand. He sucked in a breath. Your hand felt soft, slightly damp with your sweat, which soon mingled with his precum.
Lucifer's resolve not to squirm crumbled. He couldn't hold perfectly still now, his hips moving involuntarily to thrust into your hand. He bit his lip, determined at least not to moan.
"Don't do that," you said, putting your thumb on his lower lip and pulling it gently out of his teeth. "Let me hear you."
Lucifer felt his skin grow hot as the moan he'd been trying to hold back escaped him. As soon as it did, it was as though a dam had broken and he couldn't stop making noise.
"Ah," he cried. "MC, please, ah!"
"Good boy," you said sweetly. "Now come for me."
Lucifer immediately came all over your hand, a strangled cry ripping itself from his throat as he did. Lucifer was panting, his body's muscles relaxing, but he was still tied up so stiffly, he couldn't go anywhere. You allowed him to lean on you long enough to catch his breath.
Lucifer quickly learned that he was far from done with his apology and it was much later into the night before you were willing to forgive him.
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masterlist | Thank you for reading!
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raayllum · 1 day
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ALRIGHT, time to talk about the poster in lovely HD.
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First things first, I want to talk about these two ladies (?). The upper one closer to the moon looks more like an elf, and is gazing down at the second, closer woman. I've seen people speculate Ziard due to the hair, but none of this usual clothing appendages are there, so I lean towards a new character, and possibly being the human Aaravos had a special connection to. We see what looks like the arches of the Moon Nexus framed behind them, which was the case both when Rayla went through the portal in TTM and when Lujanne used historia viventum to show Callum the way things looked before. Souls of hate and love, maybe?
We see other Moon symbols throughout the posture sure as archangel lunarises, which seek out Moon magic (1x01) and can be used in illusion spells (2x03, 3x09). We also see the enchanted lotuses from 3x03, though for what purpose is unclear (more on that later).
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Moving down, we have a fully celestial, quite happy Aaravos. He's in full flourish and clearly using Moon magic for someone, as begetting the moon behind him, though whether he's constructing lotuses or channeling energy into his Key (perhaps making it able to sense Moon magic) is unknown. While the lotuses in 3x03 were occasionally different colours, the deep purple here makes me think of dark magic. If he is channeling his cube, perhaps he's taking moon energy from the lotuses (or moths) surrounding him to put inside.
I don't think I need to scream much further than I already have about the Moon rune glowing on his Key and having it displayed with his usual star symbol (rune cube foreshadowing symbolism my beloved). This bodes well for theories in which 1) Callum goes too far and does something knowingly risky to free the Moon fam for Rayla's sake or 2) does something risky to help Aaravos to protect Rayla's life, each subsequently to being possessed and/or playing into Aaravos' hands. Thank you goodnight.
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Then we have the book, which is deeply fascinating. It seems like a very Moon book, the fragments framing it similar to the ones we see on the lotuses and possibly evoking one of the archangel lunaris' flying around. It wouldn't surprise me if the book contains a variant of Deep moon magic of some kind, whatever that would look like. The crescent curved moon is also similar to the symbol we see on Aaravos' poem page for the Midnight Star in show (2x08). I do wonder why each side of the book looks so different though, with no actual visible moon in sight besides the tiny gemstones and the crescent moon, the other side being entirely dark (which, to be fair, is pretty moon-y).
We also sort of but don't quite see Aaravos' famous chest piece, though it is a-glowing. Whether it glowed all the time pre-Fall we just don't know, as the only time we've seen it glow/be filled in is 2x09 when he's channeling magic through Viren, but who knows. It does mean that the cube is even older than his banishment and that if it does hold his chest piece, it was placed after (if it's tangible at all, which has always been one of the biggest questions).
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This is perhaps the weirdest thing that I am the most interested in, as alongside his crown and bangles, this is the biggest design difference between Aaravos in-show and out. In show, both in his mirror and even 'pre-Fall' (aka the timeline for the 1x01 shot is probably a lie anyway), Aaravos' hip thingy is a lot more simplistic.
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However, Aaravos does have all his flowery (and I mean that literally, it looks like petals) adornment in his concept art.
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The fact they have a lotus flower flair to them always felt interesting but ultimately like a coincidence, but perhaps not. Either way as pictured below, it seems like he's either constructing or dismantling the lotuses, which is Eyes Emoji either way.
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The most... surely metaphorical / abstract portion of the poster, though, is I'd imagine the very bottom. I hesitate to read into things too literally (one of the S5 posters had Finnegrin's ship being blasted with lightning and Domina watching the waves, and while she featured in the season and played a role in Finnegrin's aims, the scene itself as portrayed did not come fully to fruition) so I'm gonna go with a more symbolic read, just as as disclaimer.
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Lastly we have these two figures. I'm assuming the one in white is an elf and betting on young Aaravos or Leola, though it could be someone else connected to the Moon arcanum (the elven daughter who vouched for exiling rather than eliminating humanity?). The red and black shadow figure feels far more sinister (blood and stardust, anyone) but if you lighten the shadows, you get something even more... interesting, shall we say.
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Rather than standing up straight, this figure almost seems to swoop down with a draconic like claw and a face that reminds me the most of Sir Sparklepuff's features, honestly, perhaps boasting a similar kind of blood (Viren's) and star (Aaravos) and dark magic (the staff?). It is also clearly moving toward the more humanoid figure on the bottom right, which gives a "corruption is reaching / coming for / offering things to you" sort of vibe.
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thunder-point · 1 day
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Long ramble ahead
I've talked a bit about some things I liked, and mostly qotey, but I mentioned already that I adore phumpeem also, and this episode just spurred my love for their dynamic even more BECAUSE
THIS REACTION???????
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THIS ONE AS WELL???
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HOLD UP SOMEONE HOLD ME SOMEONE HOLD PHUM'S UNSTABLE ASS
For the love of everything on this planet I LOVED LIVED BREATHED FOR IT.
Not only because I adored how positive it was on both ends, but because of the differences and the genuine quality it gave me. The kiss was absolutely delightful, once again pondphuwin just delivered on that aspect, as they did throughout the entirely of Never Let Me Go.
BUT LISTEN Y'ALL
I just????? Fucking love???? HOW DIFFERENT PHUM AND PEEM EXPRESS THEIR LIKE TOWARDS EAC H OTHER
First of all I don't know how others feel about phum's character. Personally, I enjoy it very much. He has very visible flaws, emotional constipation in some aspects, but those in some way give way for other moments that just express how free he is with his feelings.
Because he likes Peem, and this episode he expressed it so openly that it gave me LIFE.
We don't know much about Phum yet, but he seems to have a complicated relationship with his parents. It gives the feelings that he lacked the affection he needed in the past. That, of course, leads to the attitude of seeking it so selfishly like he does with Peem.
And it's enjoyable to watch. He's a needy asshole, he's arrogant and he's attractive and he's attracted to Peem and he doesn't let ANY chance slip to get that attention that he wants. And even if it started in a rough way in the beginning, I genuinely think it's mostly because, for the most part, some people who never really had the attention they needed resort to getting it in very obnoxious manners later on. Phum is doing exactly that.
There are many things to talk about when it comes to Phum, and I hope that as the series goes on we get more from him, and good things while we are at it, but I just love how his crush developed. I loved that as soon as he realized he truly fucked up, he apologized THREE times, I love how remorseful he's looking in episode 6 when Peem's ruined painting is mentioned.
And I absolutely love how blunt he is with his feelings for Peem. He doesn't waste any time in episode 6. Not even caring if his friends catch on, if Peem's friends catch on. My man Phum is on a mission and he is RELENTLESS.
I think it gives me so much joy because they could have totally made a character like Phum, who is prideful and stubborn, hide his feelings behind teasing and this 'you are my slave' act that he puts forward. But instead, we got the softest smiles from him after the kiss. We got him coming into the art gallery TO TAKE PICTURES, TO START A CONVERSATION ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED.
We got him calling Peem adorable and pleading Peem to draw on a cup with him. He just wants LOVE. He wants it and as soon as he saw Peem reciprocated in some way it's like it exploded from him. And there's so much to say about it. God.
But Peem? Listen, I love it even more on Peem's side.
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Not only did this man INITIATE THE FIRST KISS, the way he's processing these emotions are so funny AND SO REAL.
I loved it from the very beginning that we see that Peem is attracted by Phum as much as he's incensed with him. He admitted it - Phum is handsome, but he's an asshole. And that's real. As someone who fell for a person who I bickered with a lot at first, I had such joy watching Peem's way through his bond with Phum and how it developed.
Because Phum has his bad sides, and he seems to bring them up around Peem for that attentions and reactions it gets him, but when Phum goes soft? That's when his attractiveness and his personality clash in a way that seems to make Peem WEAK.
"You're so demanding, Peem," said softly had Peem BY THE THROAT. And I felt that.
Phum apologizing so softly, Phum eating Peem's atrocious cooking. Peem? Absolutely GONE for it. And that's certainly such a rushing feeling to have. Peem is clearly not experienced with relationships, and that just makes the fact that he initiated the kiss SO MUCH BETTER.
Because we know that he's not scared of showing his emotions. Even if he's a people pleaser, he's not a pushover. He kicked Phum's balls back into his goddamn body as soon as he had the chance. HE THREW A CHANCLA AT HIM.
Him going for the kiss when he felt the need to MAKES SENSE. it's wonderful.
And don't get me started on how often my man seemed to fantasize back to those soft moments with Phum. Don't get me started ON HIS CONVERSATION WITH Q this episode about affection and relationships and FUCK. Don't get me started on his gay panicked ass.
that's a ramble for another post. I feel like this is already too long and too incoherent. I jumped from so many topics but I have so many feelings for these two. As many as I have for Qtoey.
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skythighs · 1 day
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Calista's Dream Chapter 5
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I don't own the art used per usual. It's all from Pinterest. So we all know Feyd is psychotic so this is me channeling that energy. Tbh I love a fine psychotic love interest that pushes the boundaries of love and toxicity.
Warnings: dub con/non con elements, uninformed voyeurism. 18+ only please 🙏🏽
Word count: 2.2k
I was seated next to Feyd Rautha near the gluttonous Baron as he shoveled unfathomable amounts of food into his mouth. Feyd barely touched his food and sat stiffly in his chair. There were about twenty noble Harkonnen couples around the table. More than once, I caught the lecherous looks of the male counterparts, and it made my skin crawl. The Baron however couldn’t be bothered to socialize with them, for he was far too preoccupied with plates stacked so high they would surely topple to the floor. 
After dinner my husband disappeared and I was bathed meticulously by the nameless slave who used her body to shield me earlier. She washed my hair very gently, almost as if she was afraid of it, which made me smile. Once we were done I noticed there was a red mesh robe laid out on the bed. 
“We must prepare you for the consummation Na Baroness.”
“Oh, of course.”
She placed the robe over my shoulders helping me put my arms in each hole. I flinch slightly when I feel her move to drape something across my eyes.
“What are you doing?”
“Na Baron requested you wear this tonight.”
“A blindfold? Why?”
“I can not say.” She looked down at the floor like she did so often.
“What will happen once you blindfold me?” I ask hesitantly.
“I will lead you to the ceremony room, where Na Baron awaits you.”
I nod my head slowly agreeing to the terms. With the blindfold secured she grasps my hands and places them on her shoulders before moving slowly before me guiding me away from the quarters that had become familiar to me in this short time. 
The place beyond the doors was just as silent as earlier today when I explored them, and the walk seemed to take much longer than I anticipated.
“Are we almost there?”
“Yes, Na Baroness.”
I hear large doors creak open and I’m led into a warm room. Much warmer than the chilly empty corridors. She removes my hands from her shoulders and then moves away from me leaving me feeling vulnerable and insecure.
“Wife.” Feyd calls out to me from nearby. 
I feel him grip my waist and pull me towards him before I smack against his bare chest ungracefully.
“What’s going on I-”
“Shhh.” He leans down to my ear before continuing.
“Don’t remove the blindfold, no matter what you hear.”
Without another word he lifts me off the floor placing me on an elevated platform. There was a silky material beneath my body but not much give besides that.I rubbed my hand around me trying to get a grasp of my surroundings. Feyd Rauthas hands stroke against my breasts slowly making me seek out his lips blindly. Our lips briefly brush before he shoves me flat on my back seemingly agitated with my attempt. My lips quiver in fear, this level of disadvantage struck a chord inside my brain. Alarm bells were ringing and I try to sit up before his large hand pressing on my chest prevents it.
“Don’t.” He orders harshly. 
“Please let me up, I don’t like this. I can’t see anything.” I plead.
A low chuckle sounds from somewhere else in the room and I jerk my head toward the offending sound. Are there others in this room? Watching us? Horror drains the color from my face. I move my hands up to the blindfold quickly, but Feyd grips my hands and pins them above my head. I feel his lips brush my ear again before he speaks calmly to me.
“I said don’t remove it. No matter what you hear.” 
He squeezes my wrists to emphasize his words. As if to pacify me, he kisses me then. A slow exploring kiss that would have put me at ease any other time, but not now. My body is rigid as he continues kissing me, slowly licking into my mouth deeply. He squeezes my wrists again, silently ordering me to keep them there above my head. His giant hands slither down my frame, gripping and pinching as they travel. I feel each of his hands warp around my thigh and spread my legs as wide as they can go before he settles between them.
His large erection rubs against me suddenly, and he begins to pull the mesh robe up around my waist, not removing it from my form completely. He detaches his lips from mine before slowly moving down to suck on my nipple through the mesh material. A small sigh leaves my lips and he swirls his tongue around before moving to do the same to the other. All the while his erection rests against my heated entrance twitching occasionally. I slowly move my hands down. I want to explore his body as much as he explores mine, and he lets me. I feel him tense slightly at first but then he relaxes as I slowly stroke his muscled back up and down with both hands. 
He bites my nipple and I dig my nails into his back reflexively and he sighs quietly before claiming my lips again. My thighs naturally wrap around his waist as I feel my body become soft again. Forgotten was the misplaced chuckle from somewhere in the room. Right now all I could think about was him, the feel of him, the taste of him. It was all so overwhelming. He reaches between us letting his finger circle my clit bringing back memories of the night we shared together. 
My moan slips out, and he's there to capture it with his lips just like that night. His finger works quickly and deftly before his hand is absent and it’s been replaced with his manhood. He strokes it up and down my slit, letting it slip and slide against me. Earning a groan from the both of us, which prompts him to slowly enter me. I pull away from his lips to breathe slowly and more controlled, preparing myself for what was next.
He breaks me apart, sliding until balls deep in one long stroke, causing me to cry out. It hurts so much that tears are caught by the blindfold. They keep coming until eventually one leaks down my face. Feyd captures it with his tongue and then rests his forehead on mine.
“Such a good pet.” 
This earns laughter from various spots in the room around me. I tense then and cause myself unspeakable pain in the process. 
I whimper aloud and try to push him away from me, out of me, but he won’t budge.
“Don’t fight me Calista, it’ll only be worse.”
“Feyd stop please. Why am I blindfolded? Are we being watched-”
He captures my lips and kisses me harshly as if punishing me for asking questions. He pulls out of me before diving in brutally. Earning a shriek from me, but it doesn’t stop him. He does it over and over, and I find myself trying to scoot backward and away. The faceless voices around the room snicker at my attempt. Feyds grip on my waist stops my attempt to run before he flips me onto all fours and re enters me with a splintering stroke of his cock. He pushes my head down onto the silks below us and holds me exactly where he wants me. What can I do? What can I do? The fear settles into me and I start to cry burying my face into the silk.
“Remove her robe Na Baron. I want to see-”
A resounding hiss from Feyd silences any other attempts at speaking amongst the viewing crowd. Skin slapping skin is all that can be heard now as well as my quiet sniffles here and there. With his hips pistoning into me I bite my knuckles to prevent myself from sobbing. 
Feyd Rautha starts panting like an animal in heat, and I just want it to be over, so I move my hips back, meeting each thrust. His hand settles on my lower back, helping me meet him thrust for thrust, and he moans above me. I feel him lie his front against my back as if he can’t get enough of feeling me. It's as if he wants to absorb my soft skin and bones with his much more hard ones. It's as if he's trying to merge us into a single being.
 He groans into my ear before biting down on the back of my neck painfully as he releases his seed so deeply inside of me. He brushes against a tender spot, and I feel myself reach an unknown peak. I bite my knuckles even more, refusing to cry out in pleasure. Warmth paints my insides, and he keeps stroking until he hisses and shivers behind me. He grips a fist full of my hair, pulling me up with him, forcing his despicable lips onto mine. His arm was placed across me, covering my breasts. He removes himself from the platform before guiding me down as well. 
I try to stand but my legs give out beneath my weight which causes raucous laughter around the room.
“Feyd, what a lovely performance as always. You may go.” Baron Vladimir spoke clearly, no doubt wanting me to know he was present.
Feyd scoops me up into his arms before walking out of the too warm room. All I can do is rest my head against his shoulder and let him carry me out. I was in no state to protest, although I continued to cry silently. Once we reach his chambers he removes the blindfold from my eyes and carries me to the bathing area. He doesn’t speak to me or try to comfort me; he simply watches me as he lowers us both into the tub. The hot water stings my sensitive folds causing me to hiss at the contact. 
“You did well tonight.” He says with pride as he strokes my cheek softly reminiscent of the first time on Caladan. 
“Why?”
He doesn’t respond for a long time as he stares off into space, although he continues to stroke me.
“It had to be done.” He says with finality. 
He didn’t want to continue this conversation. That much was clear.
“Will we ever have to-”
“No. Never again.”
I look him in the eye and see the truth there.
The next morning I woke up alone in the large bed. My core felt battered and bruised and it hurt to move. The nameless slave appeared by my side looking concerned.
“Na Baroness, I’ve been ordered to keep you in bed today. Whatever you need I will provide.” She bows looking at the floor as if she’s ashamed.
“Did you know what would happen there last night?”
“Yes, but I was not permitted to tell you. Forgive me. The Baron demanded the old tradition be upheld, I heard Na Baron Feyd Rautha was not pleased when he received the news."
“It’s not your fault. I just- I don't quite understand any of this or why it happened, and I'm in so much pain."
I felt so hollow. Like a husk of a person. Had I really been reduced to this in such a short time? Was there no fight left in me?
"I have something here for the pain." She holds out a small white pill and a glass of water.
“Are you hungry Na Baroness? I can have the kitchens prepare something special for you.”
“Yes. Thank you.”
After eating and refreshing myself in the bathing chamber I climb back into bed and lounge.
“When will my chambers be ready for me to move into?”
“Na Baron informed the staff you would no longer be needing your own accommodations. You are to reside with him permanently.”
I couldn’t bother responding to her revelation, I was too exhausted. I felt too weak, and I found myself drifting into a slumber even though it was only mid day. I hear movement near me and feel the bed dip, causing me to readjust. I snuggled deeper into the pillow I hugged against my torso. I then felt slow, soft strokes in my hair, lulling me back to sleep.
When I awake the room is dark, but I can feel eyes on me. Watching my every move.
“You slept the day away, pet. Who knew pleasure would take so much out of you?”
Without turning over to look at him I shake my head.
“You’re mistaken, there was no pleasure, only pain.” My shoulders tense as I feel him adjust behind me.
“Is there a difference, wife?” He questions genuinely. Running his large palm down my back. I hug the pillow closer as if it could save me. His touch once excited me, but now I felt only fear. I could remember asking him to stop only to be ignored. I could hear the chuckles from the room and feel the vulnerability of being fucked in front of a crowd while blindfolded. Last night may haunt me forever. 
“Yes. There is.” I say firmly.
He hums contemplatively as if mulling over a brand new discovery. Perhaps for him pleasure and pain were one in the same but that was no excuse.
“I want my own chamber, Feyd Rautha.”
His hand moves from my back to my hair gripping it painfully forcing me to turn and face him. My lips quiver as I look him in his eyes. 
“No.” He bites out brushing his nose against my cheek staring into one eye.
“You said I need only speak my wishes and they would be granted. Was that a lie?”
His hand loosens half an inch as he watches me.
“Are you angry with me, pet? You wish to leave my bed?”
I close my eyes tightly, too afraid to look at him any longer as I speak.
“You hurt me last night and I don’t trust you anymore.”
He laughed a deep offensive laugh for a solid two minutes right in my face.
“Trust. Unfortunately, my innocent little pet Giedi Prime is deprived of trust."
He spits the last word bitterly.
"You will adapt."
Taglist: @mamawiggers1980 @drunkennunicornn @aoi-targaryen @lovereadingfanfic @avidreader73
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nicollekidman · 2 days
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Waitttt please talk more about tashiart bc i see most ppl slander Art specifically even zendaya (which surprised me) but to me it was always art for tashi even when they first meet its clear she prefers art and wants his number, she wants art to win so badly because she wants their family but also because she wants to respect him
yeah i absolutely agree i think with the standard caveats that they all need each other in different ways and the beauty of the movie is it's up for interpretation etc etc etc
art and tashi have a different dynamic from the drop than tashi and patrick. patrick has the swagger and the bluster and he pushes at tashi like he pushes at art, but the way art chooses his words is much more careful (you screamed) and i think immediately pings to her that he has what she needs (discipline, awareness, insightfulness) in a very particular way that patrick doesn't. also i think it shouldn't be overlooked that she clocks in the hotel room that patrick is hung up on art even though art is focused on her, so i think her awareness of patrick's emotional unavailability (as it were) colors her choices going forward. like... knowing that art is tuned into her and is malleable and willing, while patrick might have the fire but he's already not aligned with her (their) priorities and the Thing that separates them is confidence, not necessarily skill..... "you can beat him. you should beat him" is her choice and its also a test.
and like. he fails it in that moment because it's a test patrick is also participating in!! but patrick and tashi don't have enough between them to sustain them, they're all bark and no real bite because he's not serious or disciplined enough to be a viable partner for her, even before she needs a surrogate. they clearly have a lot of spark but you can't sustain that. she likes when patrick pushes her but she doesn't respect him.
fast forward to 13 years of marriage.......... i get that people have the impulse to say that tashi only loves tennis or tashi can't love art because he's a lapdog or they want her to be a girlboss or whatever but like. those two deeply want/need each other it's just much more difficult for her to communicate that kind of connection than it is with patrick because patrick is simpler. he doesn't demand anything form her really, besides her anger and her body (occasionally), and both of them still exist as teenagers with endless potential in his mind, which is safe. but art is demanding everything from her, even as he's reciprocating by giving her literally every piece of himself, the way he nursed her through her injuries and she his means that like. she can't hide anywhere. so like they're not verbalizing things the same way patrick does, but the devotion is there. she never ever stops telling art he can beat patrick, and when she's not sure, she begs patrick to lose so that there's never any danger of her having to make that choice.
and like. i think art and tashi could be happy without tennis, but i think the point is that she doesn't know because they've never had to try, and even the possibility that she'd lose it all if art doesn't have it in him is enough to make her humble herself in front of patrick. which she has no reason to do unless she wants to keep him. like. they've built an entire life together, she's built art into who he is but that's a two-way process. and they end up inviting patrick back into the fold which enriches their lives and gives them the boost they need but ultimately it's still them inviting patrick into the life they've built together. i don't think it's a happy ending or really a story at all unless you think tashi loves art desperately.
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littlefankingdom · 2 days
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~ Batgirl (2000)
They are sad and disappointed in themselves and they should be. What they did is not justice.
So, I'm mad about this issue, like really mad for personal reasons I will explain later. For context: a young girl has been kidnapped by a thief who escaped jail. It's not the first time said thief kidnapps this girl. This young girl, around 10 years old, is an artist and her mother exploits her, making money by selling her daughter's art. They are rich. This woman doesn't love her daughter, she loves the money she is making from her daughter. The man that keeps kidnapping this young girl? Her father. Her father that loves and cares for her, that turned to crime to take care of his daughter, and refuses to sell any art she makes because she made it for him, because she loves her father. And she pleads, she pleads Batgirl to let her with her father and not bring her back to her mother who doesn't love her, she pleads her to not put her father in jail. And what do Batgirl does? She stops the father, gives him to the cops and brings back the girl to her mother. On those panels, they are looking at a sad child with her abuser they brought her back to.
My mother doesn't love me. She will say she does to others, but it's not true and it has been the case for a long time, since I was very young. I wasn’t unwanted, I was just not what she wanted. My life was supposed to be centered, until my death, around taking care of my mother (she is not disabled or anything, she just wants people to do everything for her). Raised to make money I would gift to my mother, so she could have luxuries, but I was not successful in that. I grew up pleading for love, pleading for people to listen to my pain. Nobody did. I learnt that people prefer the comfort and peace of their lives over helping others. I learnt to distrust authority figures (teachers, doctors, any adults/people at least 5 years older than me in general), because either they were power hungry assholes who abuse kids, either they preferred to look away, who would tell me to be nice and listen to my mother. It's too much problem to help children. In the end, I could count on nobody but myself to get out. I can count on nobody but myself. I hate the system, and I promised myself I would never be like those who look away, I will defend any child that needs it.
So, to read a story where a little girl pleads a HERO to not bring them back to their abuser, only for said HERO to still bring her back to her abuser, to tell her to be nice and stay with her awful parent... I am furious. This issue is literally telling me that, if heroes existed, the heroes you adore since you are a child, they would not have saved you. They would have bring you back to your mother and told you to be nice, like everyone else. They would have let you go through those years of pain. Heroes would have looked away.
What is the logic here? Because it's neither justice or the good thing to do. That it is the law? Since when do they follow the law? I don't remember vigilantism being legal, or assault and battery, or owning all the weapons Bruce owns. Yes, it was still a kidnapping, her father is a criminal, it would not have been a good life for a child. But, the Bats could have tried to find a solution, instead of simply giving this child back to someone who will treat her like shit.
I know it's just a fiction, so it's not like a real child is being exploited and will be more abused later when she stops being good enough because her mental health deteriorated, nobody is going to become depressed and lose trust in heroes because the bats brought her back to her awful mother. And also, it's not the characters who are at fault, it's the writers. It's not about Cass and Bruce being bad people heroes, it's about who the fuck decided to write that. New entries in my list of enemies, Keller Puckett and Dylan Horrocks.
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symptomsofdeceit · 2 days
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hihi!! :3 this is my first ever time sending someone an ask AND IM REAAALLY NERVOUS. gonna stay anonymous, because i'm a bit shy. also sorry if my grammar and spelling gonna be goofy, english isn't my first language :")
i found out about your game a couple of days ago and these crazy boys won't leave my mind ever since. i looove pathetic loser men and yanderes ❤️. demo is great!! your art style is soo pretty and i really like your character writing!!!! forgot that description said that there's two yanderes, so Nalis ending got me like 😳😳😳 OKAY THAT'S UNEXPECTED BUT SO DAMN HOT. Thaumo is so adorable! THAT MOMENT WITH FORK THO 😭😭😭 don't know which one of them is my fav so far. guess they have to fight for my heart so i could find out >:3 Tremo is so pretty!! ah, tired mysterious women are my weakness ❤️ also i feel sorry for Johnsoni, poor guy! #justice for Johnsoni, hope to see his sprite in future :"D i'm so eager to see what's awaits MC in next update. i know that game development isn't that easy, especially when you have to work irl. don't forget to take breaks from time to time, make an update at your own comfortable pace aand stay hydrated!!! your tumblr page and answer for other ppl asks about these weirdos is my food for now ❤️❤️❤️
SORRY THAT'S A WHOLE ESSAY LOL. just wanted to show how much i love your visual novel and characters! have some ideas for asks too, hope i will find the courage to write here again :"3 watch out Nalis and Thaumo, my future asks might be… veery silly >:D
Hello, & I apologize for this reply being late! I appreciate the ask very much, & no worries on your English!! I think you’ve done perfect here :)
I’m so so happy that you’ve enjoyed my demo!!!!This entire message has me grinning at my phone so so hard. If you eventually do decide on a favorite between the two I’d love to know which one it is!! I hope you’re taking breaks + staying hydrated in your life as well, and thank you so much for all of your kind words (。ŏ﹏ŏ)💕💕💕💕
You have no idea how much I appreciate your words, this means a lot to me!! I would really love to have you in my inbox again, so I’m mentally sending you all the courage I can ✨💪😤 silly asks are some of my favorites, I’m excited to see what you’d throw at the boys!
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Hi, I know it's been a while but it's allo (autistic? unsure what tag to use) anon here again. I just wanted to say congratulations on the project! I showed it to my girlfriend and she was really happy, when it comes out we will definitely read it together. I am proud to see you doing new and exciting things, and I wish you nothing but the best in your future endeavors! You're doing amazing already and I look forward to seeing you continue on whatever path you want to take with your creative work :)
Sorry I didn't message again sooner, things in real life have been... a lot. I still try to check this blog when I can. Your art is still adorable, and I also wanted to say thank you for your comics about fandom and the stuff that people say to aro/ace people. As someone who is very invested in media analysis(TM) and fandoms, I have noticed some behaviour that is really weird and uncomfortable, and it's good to see other people speaking out about it.
Also, not to decenter your experience, but the comic about labels really hit home for me. When I first got diagnosed it explained so much about my struggles and why I felt the way I did. It was groundbreaking to understand that I wasn't just a broken person or full of character flaws, but that things like sensory issues were just part of being who I am. I don't know if you meant it this way, but I really love the yellow colour of the thought bubbles and the little flowers. I know some people say it's pathologizing or too restrictive to cling to labels so much, but it really is a relief to be given something that helps you understand yourself and feel so much less alone. I am glad you were able to find your identity and community. It's so cool that now you get to make those posts, and probably reach others!
I just wanted to pop in again and say I love your stuff, and it's so cool to see other people loving and engaging with it too. I hope you have a wonderful day/night, passe une bonne journée/nuit <3
P. S. I hope that's how you say it, I'm using google translate.
Heyyyy!!^^ Thank you so much for reaching out again and for all the encouragement and support! I hope you and your girlfriend are doing OK^^ And please don't apologize for not reaching out for a while, I'm happy whenever you do at all but it's very fair to have a lot going on otherwise! If anything I hope things are a bit easier now, so to speak.
Also don't worry about decentering my experience by sharing yours when you relate! I'm a big believer in intersectional discussion, I think people from marginalised groups could benefit a great deal from standing together to defend common interests, and if we can relate to each other's experiences in some way even just a little, although we know and acknowledge they're all different, I'm sure we can go a long way. So I sincerely appreciate you sharing, honestly!! (I'm also really grateful you liked the way I graphically conveyed it, that is a challenge in and of itself^^)
Again, thank you so much for all the positive feedback and support, and thanks for taking the time to add some French in as well, very kind of you^^
Hope you have a great day ahead!
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Lackadaisy Enrichment
#in our enclosures!!#video linked as source; which i'm glad to see already has a million views and is trending. That's Right#lackadaisy#WHICH i have been reading since at least '07 when i was thirteen my god b/c this animation is based on the ongoing webcomic#like does its influence show up Directly in some Discrete way i can point to in my art? not very easily probably. And Yet.#the inspiration....i wasn't able to be Regularly Only for at least another year / art done Nonprofessionally Online was novel to me#like wow ppl can make & post fanart of w/e they love huh....didn't know webcomics were a thing & i never really read that many since but.#good god the quality of Lackadaisy at its onset is like this is superb?? this person putting in all their talent and effort???#and Then you get years & years more art and i don't even know what superlatives to throw out abt its quality as it evolves. obsessed w/it..#if i see a new lackadaisy comic page i Will be acting out. obviously this animation is a delight & also stunning. and fascinating to also#juxtapose as a Translation / Interpretation of the comic in a different medium & standalone snippet of Story#and that we're not even quite there in the comic timeline; Taking Notes abt character info we get distilledly here....genuinely love like#take it back to '07 i'm like oh boy can't wait for the dream team to assemble. then a decade later when it did? Oh Boy. that is payoff lol#namely hooray for stitches and mudbug at the field office for every passing gangster. killing one marigold associate but not the other#which seems like a promising start to shootouts w/the other dream team triumvirate. i adore that in canon so far mordecai freckle & rocky#have met but only over a nice brunch. re: all intentions anyways. anyways i'm like Gifs Must Be Made while i'm also so riled afresh abt the#comic that i've been sooo hype for for over fifteen yrs now babeyyy Deservedly. i've done a couple of rereads & ought to do another....#For Interest it'd probably take a few sittings to catch up from the start but there is much to be engaged over....this ongoing story that's#historical fiction prohibition bootlegging cats with plenty of focus on characters & several Mysteries. which i'm better at parsing now lol#like one of the more recent rereads like Oh Of Course x (probably) accidentally killed his y & z took the fall & that's a binding secret...#Not [oh of course] abt the circumstances surrounding a's death & how b & c were involved. nor the ''what's marigold's damage'' mystery#which is great. love to not know things. love that we can readily follow all the emergent drama everyone's wading in nowadays. hell yeah#anyways admire my organized approach to gifs here. four shots each Expressions Atmosphere Action Groupshots#sure might've muddled through gifmaking for this anyways but fr being a huge lackadaisy comic enjoyer for now most of my life helps#and its very Overall Inspiration like. just really getting the [you can really just draw stuff out here] going. fr the art's detail & skill#and that enrichment like i'm gonna have a great time following this. And I Have#you don't expect a crowdfunded indie animation in the mix back then but hell yeah fellas#SIGH ok removing a 4th gif that's broken / not displayed despite reuploading then entirely remaking it. if it's a bug i'll try again later
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 7 months
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Wardrobe Woes
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moe-broey · 1 month
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One thing they don't tell you about the Senshi tulpa that WILL inevitably manifest in your mind to tell you to eat better is that. Every time I make myself a coffee via kuerig instantly, I can hear him. Lamenting the fact that I have become so accustomed to convenience and ease that even a standard coffee machine has become foreign to me. I am thinking about how to make coffee without use of a machine in the first place, I am wondering where my french press went, I can see him. In my mind. Showing me how to make coffee in The Dungeon. Dungeon Coffee.
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toxifoxx · 2 months
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truly at the end of the day its all about receiving validation
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Based off this post...<3
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