#FUCK YOU RANDY PITCHFORD

[fantasyconcrete]

Me: I should find more icons for Whendi.

Me sixty seconds later: GOD I MISS BATTLEBORN

#OOC #FUCK YOU RANDY PITCHFORD

[hedwyn-here]

I still see people obsessively hating on Hello Games for the launch of No Man's Sky, saying they will never trust them, never buy a game from them etc... A very ambitious game made by (for most of it's development) less than 10 employees had to cut some of it's planned content before launch. They were (reportedly) pressured into announcing the game before they were ready, their studio flooded, they had to borrow internet from their neighbours by running ethernet out of the windows, they had a huge company suddenly advertising it as the next big AAA release despite the fact the studio was running out of money...

They aren't blameless, but it doesn't take a whole lot to see how a small group who were incredibly passionate about their work (and without a PR team) could get caught up in this situation.

But you know what? They've spent the last 10 years continually working on that game. Adding more and more content, getting it to where people expected it to be and even beyond in ways nobody could have predicted. Every single trailer they've released since has shown nothing but precicely what the game will offer. And we still see people treating them like industry villains.

There's a particular reason this bothers me so much, and it's name is Randy Pitchford.

A few years before No Man's Sky was released, Gearbox advertised the game Aliens: Colonial Marines with fabricated trailers, gameplay and screenshots. Not just things that had to be removed from the game for budgetary or time reasons, but literally just things they faked purely to advertise the game. What can only be construed as an intentional attempt to lie to the audience so they would buy a game. They were accused of using money SEGA had given them for the development of the game to fund their own proejct, Borderlands. Not only did Gearbox never try to fix Colonial Marines, to my knowledge they never even acknowledged any of the shitty stuff they did. Pitchford routinely attempted to slide that blame onto others (and if I remember rightly even said some pretty unpleasant stuff abotu Steff Sterling for daring to criticise the game on multiple occasions). Yet people are still more than happy to jump on Gearbox games uncritically. Even though they reportedly treat their staff like shit. Have very questionable means of paying their staff that afford them the opportunity to deny them bonuses even management (like Pitchford) are taking home huge bonuses of their own.

This is an example of a large developer very intentionally and maliciously lying to the audience and nobody seemed to give a shit about it even as little as a year after release.

For my money, Hello Games have proven themselves. I'll take an over-ambitious passionate group of artists who can't quite deliver on their promises over a malicious and predatory corporation any day of the week.

Fuck Gearbox.

<3 Hello Games.

I can't fuckin wait to play Light no Fire, I will buy that shit day 1.

#hello games #no man's sky #Light no Fire #game developers #Gearbox #borderlands #randy pitchford #randy bitchford

[prinnamon]

[Start ID. Tags that read: #one of them is confirmed dead btw #shephard saw colettes body in xen #who knows what gina is doing #i think abt them sometimes #raging lesbians. End ID.]

Hi, Hello, and Welcome To My Twisted Mind! i don't mean to correct you @freeshephoun but i noticed your tags on my other silly half-wife post and i wanted to let you know hahahaheehoo it's worse than that :) i hope you don't mind me using you as an excuse to talk at length about cross and green and their ambiguous fate

(low-poly blood/corpse screenshots from the game and lots of text under the read more!)

[Start ID. A screenshot of what appears to be Gina Cross in a red HEV suit dead in one of the Displacement Cannon locations in Xen. End ID.]

in Opposing Force, a corpse bearing a striking resemblance to Gina Cross but wearing a red HEV suit can be found in one of the Displacement Cannon locations.

[ID in alt text.]

according to a tweet by Gearbox CEO Randy Pitchford in 2018, it is indeed Gina Cross. Colette Green's fate is unspecified, but he suggests maybe G-Man found her useful enough/had enough compassion for her to put her in stasis like Shephard.

Opposing Force did come out before Decay, so considering that changes were still being made to Decay's story during development, far enough along that there are some voice lines and animations for the scrapped missions, it's likely they had no thoughts about anything that would happen in Decay's story when they decided to include Dr. Cross's dead body as an easter egg in OpFor. so, despite the confirmation by one of the people most likely to be considered An Authority on what happened in the expansions, the canon-icity of this is... slightly debatable? especially considering that (iirc) "Gina Cross's" body can actually be spotted in multiple Displacement Cannon locations in OpFor. so unless there was a wild teleporter accident that created multiple instances of her who all died in different spots... okay, wait, i said that as a hypothetical and a joke but now i like that a lot as a narrative device, fuck.

but you get what i'm saying. whether or not this is "canon" is dubious because you'd have to reconcile a lot of contradictory story elements in order to explain how one can accept this as true.

...

CHAPTER 7: RECONCILING A LOT OF CONTRADICTORY STORY ELEMENTS IN ORDER TO EXPLAIN HOW ONE CAN ACCEPT THIS AS TRUE

[PT: Chapter 7: Reconciling a Lot of Contradictory Story Elements In Order to Explain How One Can Accept This as True /end PT]

if you choose to take Pitchford's tweet as canon, what's especially strange (and tragic, i'll explain) is that Gina has never been shown wearing a red HEV suit anywhere else as far as i'm aware. she wears an orange suit when you see her hologram in the training program in Half-Life and Opposing Force, and she wears a tan/ivory suit in Decay.

[Start ID. A scan of a posed render of Colette Green (left, standing) and Gina Cross (right, crouched) from the Half-Life PS2 manual. Colette Green wears a red HEV suit and Gina Cross wears a tan one. End ID.]

red is Colette's color, which i imagine is probably the source of the initial confusion. which could lead you to conclude that, although this is gina, she's wearing colette's HEV suit. it would explain why she's alone. her suit may have been damaged beyond repair, and it wasn't enough to protect her, so she had to take Colette's as she went off on her own for one last desperate mission that required Gina to enter the Xen even after they and Dr. Keller thought they had successfully sealed the dimensional rift.

so, yeah, picture that. they only had one working suit left. so only one of them could go. and it had to be Cross because of her experience. and even despite their best efforts, despite Green giving up her hazard suit to give Cross the best odds, she still failed.

we know based on the ending of OpFor that the detonation of the nuclear bomb in the car park would have killed anyone still stuck at Black Mesa after a certain point, as Green and Keller almost definitely were if things went back to shit after the end of Decay, which they would have had to if Cross managed to end up dead in Xen. it doesn't make sense to say that they'd then just go "acceptable losses!" and book it, since they took so much responsibility upon themselves throughout Decay's story, so i feel they probably stayed and continued to dedicate themselves to damage control up until the very end. and, like, how would they have known about the bomb? communications were out. probably nobody except Shephard, the black ops team, and that one security guard would have been aware, realistically. so, even if Green and Keller would have wanted to escape and save themselves, there's virtually no way they'd have had enough advance notice to get out of there.

but since Colette's effort was admirable enough for her to deserve a reward in the G-Man's eyes (or maybe just to be kept in reserve in case she's needed later, depending on how you read G's motivations), she, like Shephard, was placed in stasis. and if she ever wakes up again, she'll presumably be without Keller since Pitchford makes no mention of him, and she'll definitely be without Gina.

OR if you don't want to engage with the tragedy of any of this, you can just say that the dead Ginas found in OpFor are uh. y;know. copies of her that were created somehow when she and Colette got caught up in the harmonic reflux after sealing the dimensional rift! which is sad for the clones—and oooky spooky because (mario voice) who REALLY died that day? and who came back??—but otherwise, all three of them got out of Black Mesa together.

I think about them. i think about them a lot. whyyyyy why why why WHY can't dr keller and the half-wifes be from an expansion people have easy access to like blue shit and opposing fart. screams and cries and throws up!!! no actual hate towards Blue Shift or OpFor; i love them, i just wish Decay was also two dollar and on PC

Gina Cross's page on Combine OverWiki was the main source for all my information. i also sourced the screenshot of Cross dead and the scan of Cross and Green's posed render from there. hopefully this post makes people realize that there is interesting shit going on with these characters that is worth exploring.

my final message: dear entire world, include colette green in your drawings of the freezer crew chilling in stasis (nonthreatening suggestion)

#i look forward to the release of the unofficial half-life decay: solo mission on steam so i can finally play it #let me know if i typo'd or misspoke in this. i proofread it before posting #worked on this for longer than i meant to. it was originally going to be a short reblog LOL #it turned into essay-length Decay propaganda and deserved its own post #prinna's posts #half-life #half life #half-life: decay #half life: decay #half-life decay #half life decay #gina cross #colette green #half-wife #half wife #hm. unsure if it's fair to tag opposing force. well Yeah because gina's corpse is an OpFor easter egg and i talked about it at length #opposing force #hlop4 #op4 #opfor #half-life opposing force #half life opposing force #half-life: opposing force #half life: opposing force #however i will NOT be tagging keller because i barely talked about him and did not show any pictures of him #and that would feel unfair to the 2 keller fans i know have got to be out there somewhere

[asklittlepip]

Can 2024 be the year that we finally chase away the fascists? Evil never sleeps for long, of course, but we can at least hinder their power, right? Right?

Unrelated, I was, just for my own interests, going to draw up a list of assholes across different spheres of influence, and even if I only limited myself to American politics and those still alive, it was gonna go on forever, so lemme just give an abridged bunch of big ol' middle fingers to those in the gaming industry who deserve it!

Fuck Bobby Kotick!

Fuck Harry Strauss Zelnick!

Fuck John Riccitiello!

Fuck Andrew Wilson!

Fuck Tim Sweeney!

Fuck Randy Pitchford!

There's many others, of course, but these are a few executives whom you can comfortably wish the worst upon with a clear conscience. It's telling that only the last two of these have ever worked on any games themselves, with both their actual contributions being decades ago..

IMO, you shouldn't run a company whose products you aren't actually using yourself. I guarantee you that Bobby didn't login to play some Overwatch or World of Warcraft on the weekends; he was too busy flying with Epstein, threatening to kill an employee or firing hundreds of others after posting record profits, of course.

#gaming industry

[jutsei]

The fuck do you mean Gearbox, run by known Greaselord Randy Pitchford is reviving promising MOBA Hero Shooter Gigantic???

#shin shut up #Youtube

[obscura-valentini]

>read a brief description of bl3 spoilers 

#FUCK YOU RANDY PITCHFORD

[angelicguy]

randy pitchford. wears nothing but these terrible fucking shirts. please google him you cannot find a normal shirt

[magicrainbowkitties]

THIS JUST IN:

Idiot still mad about... *checks notes*... a non-binary protagonist who uses they/them pronouns in Borderlands 3. A game from 2019.

(CW, transphobia, non-binary erasure, and discourse over a fucking video game character lol)

Context, we're talking about FL4K, one of the protagonists of Borderlands 3. They're a rogue AI ranger robot with pet aliens who also happens to openly identify as non-binary. As someone who is non-binary who enjoys this kind of character, I'm still in love too this day.

As you can imagine, when the game came out, there was Discourse (TM) among the dudebros playing Borderlands.

Because, you know, how fucking dare they put non-binary characters in a video game all about rebellious spirit and fighting big corporations? /s

Now I fucking hate Gearbox (the company behind Borderlands) because they're a shit company that does shit things to its workers for the benefit of their slimeball CEO, Randy Pitchford, but that's neither here nor there. Point is, they did a good in that they took down transphobic and anti-non-binary posts from their forums and banned people purposefully misgendering both FL4K and real life non-binary people.

So naturally the discourse moved to the comment section on FL4K's trailer on YouTube. Where I felt the need to explain to these dumbasses why they got banned off the forums and why intentionally misgendering non-binary characters and people is rude and disrespectful thusly:

You'll notice that I made this comment a year ago (people were STILL MAD ABOUT IT ffs) and that it's gotten basically no attention in the grand scheme of things.

But this bitch here still decided they wanted to say something because their fragile little ego must somehow justify deliberately misgendering somebody.

Notice how once I point out their argument as being blatantly false, they go from correct pronouns right into misgendering and making out like a fully sentient and capable being can't comprehend their own gender? Smh these people I'm fucking tired of this shit.

#nonbinary #non binary #enby #borderlands #borderlands 3 #fl4k the beastmaster #borderlands fl4k #fl4k #transgender #tw transphobia #tw misgendering #tw nonbinary erasure

[border-spam]

Hello! I've been reading up on a lot of folks' critiques of BL3's writing here & there, including the writing quality of the twins, but I'm curious as to what you'd think of instead of the twins as the main baddies, we had the other two we saw a couple times, Pain & Terror, as the primary baddies. I personally thought they'd have made for more entertaining baddies, where they host a reality show that attracts all the bandit gangs to them, instead of the cringe inducing Twitch stream references.

Ah yes, I’m right back on my shit again. Buckle up!

I want to get off Border-Spam’s wild ride.

OK, so! Pain and Terror. Great stuff. Dramatically theatrical entertainers who live stream sacrifices and raids in honour of the beings they worship? Nice.

Know what’s juicier than that though? 

Two cursed twin Sirens (one a male!!), locked in a spiral of both loathing and relying on each other to reach their goals while they lead a massive pyramid scheme scam-religion as self-made false Gods, bleeding their followers dry through predatory megachurches and donation tiers while they scrabble against the Crimson Raiders in a race for ultimate power. 

So.. how come the Twins were completely shit then while Pain and Terror, who you had about 2 hours with, came across great?

It’s because Pain and Terror got a short, satisfying arc of introduction -> threat -> urgency -> climax -> payoff... and the Twins got fucking 30+ hours of non-stop TELL don’t SHOW while Randy Pitchford made fart sounds in the background.

And guess what, every “bad” character mostly disliked by the fans and every “good” character that’s mostly liked, follows this same pattern. The longer their screen time within the story, the more likely they turned into a trainwreck. Essay under the cut. /dab

One of Bl3′s main failures in writing (bar all the other shit everyone and myself has brought up 1000s of times jesus christ oh god oh god hhh), is the complete lack of “Show don’t Tell”. 

“Show don’t Tell”, for anyone who’s not heard of it, is one of the crux points of any characterisation or story writing. It’s the idea that if you only tell a reader about something and it never actually takes place as a tangible scenario or character action, it ceases to actually have any weight. 

Now I am not a professional writer, I’m a tool with a Tumblr blog and a bad case of loving a pair of fucking atrocious characters, but the Bl3 writing team are professionals. They know this rule, so I still maintain this isn’t their fault and whatever crapped all over the plot of this game was out of their hands.

Either way though, any character who was in the spotlight for more than 1 or 2 chapters was a complete shitshow. Yes, you may have your favorites within them, but looking at the game while unbiased shows too many pain points to ignore, even when it’s with a character so many people including myself love... like Tannis. 

The Twins and Lilith are great examples of how  “Show don’t Tell” being ignored destroys characters completely regardless of their backstory or what possibilities they had to be amazing.

We are told that the Twins lead a mega religion. That Troy is desperately cunning. That Tyreen is horrifically vicious. That their sway over corporations and billions of followers is so powerful, they have an unstoppable army of unlimited, deathly devoted followers.

We are told that. What are we shown for 30 hours?

Idiots. 2 people who barely are even shown on screen, have absolutely no sway over Pandora bar mayyyyybe a couple of hundred poorly equipped bandits we mow down, and who’s Grand Cathedral had like.. ten people in it. Two fucking morons who kinda hated each other just a lil bit till one of them popped his clogs and the other shrugged and walked on. The COV isn’t even the main enemy in the game. That’s Maliwan... for some reason. COV forces just randomly show up in between Maliwan fights. Even the takedowns are Maliwan. Maliwan is on Necrotafeyo long after Katagawa is dead with no logical explanation other than the only other enemy option was the COV, and they held so little threat that no one playing would have cared.

We are told that Lilith is an incredible commander, that she’s seen as some kind of awesome leader, worshiped as a hero across Pandora. That she’s trusted to lead the entirety of the crimson Raiders to the point of not being questioned by her subordinates, that after the events with Hector, she’s reaffirmed her maturity and prowess as someone to follow.

We are told that. What are we shown for 30 hours?

Idiot. Mistake after obvious mistake. Clueless leader. Atrocious at managing even a tiny crew. Acts like the VH’s victories are the raider’s, then sacrifices herself at the end while we are treated to a montage of everyone loving her so much as Thiiis girl is on fiiiiyaaaaa plays, like we are meant to actually be remotely invested in an NPC who did nothing but sniff her own fingers and proc “Speak to Lilith” quests the entire game.

The characters who survived this slow assassination are the likes of Winny and Hammerlock, Clay, Katagawa, the ones most fans agree are good.

But they are only good because they got short, concise story arcs that weren’t stretched out into absolute bullshit by atrocious writing for the entire rest of the game. It’s the same reason the DLC’s are so much better than the main plot, the story is clear, has an actual flow, and always follows introduction -> threat -> urgency -> climax -> payoff... the main game didn’t for any major character.

If Winny and Wainwright had been main story characters for more than 1 or 2 chapters? Folks, I can assure you they would had ended up terrible. If Katagawa, P+T, or Aurelia had been the main villains instead of the Twins? They would have been assassinated the exact same way. 

All the characters in BL3 are good characters, Ava included, the bad ones were just handled so poorly that they were ruined before they got the chance to shine.

Asks are Open!

#borderlands #borderlands 3 #bl3 #lilith #tannis #wainwright #hammerlock #troy calypso #tyreen calypso #aurelia #ava #katagawa #critique #my writing

[dukesnukes]

This is me begging you to go steal the rights to Duke nukem from gearbox, because i just went and read up on what the fuck the plot is of the franchise, and now knowing THE NIGHTMARE THAT WAS DUKE NUKEM FOREVER (ALIEN RAPE WISECRACKS, SPANKING, B O O B W A L L S ? ? ? ) I know in my heart of hearts that the rights CANNOT REMAIN IN PITCHFORDS'S HANDS. I will buy you a fake mustache and a large hat if needed but for the love of fuck. Gearbox is not in a good place right now and I K N O W that Randy 'USB' Pitchford will make something 20x worse and I CANNOT allow this to happen. You gotta take the boy from them and run. Sculpt him into the sweetie you portray him as. Do whatever it takes to not let Pitchford turn him into the protag equivalent of BOLOGNA and r/incels.

I WOULD LOVE TO! BUT! LET ME COUNTER SOME THINGS YOUVE SAID HERE ABOUT DUKE NUKEM FOREVER!

IVE SEEN MANY REPORTS OF RAPE JOKES AND OFFENSIVE CONTENT FOR THIS GAME. BUT, I AM CURRENTLY ON MY SECOND PLAY THROUGH OF DUKE NUKEM FOREVER. HE DIDNT MAKE A SINGLE RAPE JOKE IN THE ENTIRE GAME! HE MADE IMMATURE COMMENTS ABOUT BOOB WALLS AND SUCH, BUT THATS PAR FOR THE COURSE OF A DUKE NUKEM GAME. 

THE FRANCHISE’S TRADEMARK IS DANCING STRIPPERS! YOU GOTTA EXPECT BOOBS AND TIT CONTENT SPECIFICALLY MADE TO BE FUNNY AND REDICULOUS! ITS SORT OF NECESSARY FOR DUKE TO BOUNCE OFF OF, AND IT DEFINITELY FITS THE TREND OF THE CLASSIC GAMES, WHICH I HAVE ALSO PLAYED, AND FOR THE RECORD, DID NOT SEE ANYTHING RACIST OR RAPE-JOKEY IN EITHER... HES JUST GOOFING AROUND, AND IS ACTUALLY PRETTY RESPECTFUL TO STRIPPERS. HE GIVES THEM HUNDRED DOLLAR BILLS EVERY TIME YOU INTERRACT WITH THEM, FOR GODS SAKE! NEVER DISRESPECTS THEM, “SHAKE IT, BABY’ ‘WANNA DANCE’ HES CHEERING THEM ON!

IN DUKE NUKEM FOREVER, THERE IS AN EXCERPT WHERE YOU VISIT A STRIP CLUB THAT DUKE OWNS. THE GIRLS THERE MAKE A POINT TO THANK HIM FOR LETTING THEM WORK THERE, SAYING ITS THE BEST PLACE THEYVE EVER WORKED. IN THE BULLETSTORM DLC FOR DUKE NUKEM FOREVER, HE WORKS WITH A FEMALE SOLDIER THAT HE NEVER TRIES TO SPANK, BERATE FOR BEING A GIRL, ETC. HE TRIED TO FLIRT WITH HER WHEN HE FIRST SAW HER, BUT SHE LET HIM KNOW SHE WASNT INTERESTED AND HE DIDNT TRY AGAIN. HE STILL CARED FOR HER, BECAUSE OF HER DILEMA, BUT HE HONESTLY FLIRTED WITH THE GUY HE WAS WORKING WITH MORE!

I THINK IF GEARBOX PUTS OUT MORE CONTENT LIKE BULLET STORM, WE COULD SEE A BIG REVIVAL OF THE DUKE NUKEM FRANCHISE! DUKE ACTUALLY HAD SOME GOOD CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT IN THAT DLC!

TL;DR: DUKE NUKEM FOREVER IS NOT NEARLY AS OFFENSIVE OR EVEN AS BAD OF A GAME AS PEOPLE MADE IT OUT TO BE THROUGH REVIEWS! GO PLAY IT FOR YOURSELF AND YOULL SEE ITS REALLY JUST A GOOFY, FUNNY TESTOSTERONE FEST LIKE ANY DUKE NUKEM GAME SHOULD BE!

#THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK! #duke nukem #gearbox #duke nukem forever #dnf

[angeltannis]

Back when I was first getting into Borderlands, I found this interview with Randy Pitchford where he said he’s “been stealing from Alien [his] entire career” and I’m not gonna go into the thing with Aliens: Colonial Marines or whatever but every time I think about it there really are SO many similarities between Borderlands and the Alien movies

-BL1 / Alien: crew of adventurers answer a distress call from an alien planet, guided by an “AI” who seems to be helping them but whose actual goal is to retrieve the alien specimen/power for corporate interests, while the crew themselves are entirely expendable. They manage to “destroy” the alien, but the ending feels foreboding and you’re left with a feeling that this definitely is not the last of the creature

-BL2 / Aliens: planet has been colonized, corporate interests trying to study and secretly potentially wield alien power. Motley crew of mercenaries are brought in woefully uninformed and unprepared for what’s to come. “AI” the cast and viewer is initially wary of proves to be trustworthy by sacrificing themselves for the cause. Survivors manage to pull off a victory against a huge monster of an alien, in the process killing off a man who wanted to use that power for corporate interests. Also side plot, but: They come across a surprisingly-capable young girl who’s been surviving on her own since her parents were killed, and take her in.

-BL3 / Alien 3: Centers around a cult made up of dangerous people/criminals, ends with the series’ lead heroine sacrificing herself via throwing herself into fire to prevent alien power from being unleashed on the world. Also both came out after many years stuck in production hell, suffered multiple rewrites, and killed off two fan favorite characters, leading to both A3 and BL3 being widely panned lol

Also a bit of a weaker connection but BL: The-Presequel plays out similar to Prometheus & Alien Covenant, where you learn more about the origins of the aliens and see how one of the series’ major male antagonists ended up in that major villain role, as well as his connection to the alien(s)

Which leads to my (semi-serious, lol) prediction that the next Borderlands game will consist of Lilith coming back in some fucked-up way (in Alien: Resurrection Ripley is cloned with hybrid human and alien DNA, giving her enhanced speed and strength but basically no capacity for human emotion), and someone will be trying to get either Guardians or Vault Monsters to give live birth lol...might even end up with a hybridized, humanoid Vault Monster that sees Fucked Up Lilith as its mother. Who knows 🤷

#borderlands #alien #BL1 #BL2 #bl3 #lilith the siren #forgot u can’t include links so it’s in the source 🙄 #anyway once I realized all this it made perfect sense that BL3 kinda sucked lmao #it was all foretold in the prophecy #hopefully this means BL4 will be just batshit enough that *i* like it even if no one else does #I could see Tannis in the role of Wynona Rider’s character Call #which would mean...maybe her and Fucked Up Alien Lilith would get a kiss scene 👉👈

[thisyearingaming]

2011 - This Year in Gaming

Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective - Nintendo DS, January 11th

A quirky adventure game where you are fucking dead, and you gotta work out who killed you. Ghost Trick is like Ace Attorney at first glance - it looks similar, and is made by effectively the same development team. Give it a shot on iOS.

Dead Space 2 - Multiplatform, January 25th 

Dead Space 2 was the undisputed king of alien horror until Alien: Isolation released. Yeah, you battle massive acid-spitting aliens, but it’s the necromorph babies you’re gonna be shit-scared of. It isn’t quite as unique as it’s predecessor, but it’s definitely much better to play. Bring your brown pants.

The Nintendo 3DS Releases - March 27th

The 3DS was like magic when you first fired the 3D slider all the way up - then it became a gimmick you never used again. Releasing with a few decent launch titles and being able to boast Street Fighter IV as playable, the 3DS arguably didn’t really pick up much steam until a few months after launch. While more powerful than the original DS which was six years old at the time, I can’t remember being particularly interested in it at the time.

Portal 2 - Multiplatform, April 19th 

Valve’s final single player experience until their jump into VR was a bloody good one - very funny and amusingly written with the best Steve Merchant performance since The Ricky Gervais Show, Portal 2′s puzzle solving adventure is rarely a chore to play through, and has thousands of custom maps courtesy of the Steam community.

L.A. Noire - Multiplatform, May 17th

Rockstar’s foray into adventure games has stood the test of time as an enjoyable and often startling journey nto the seedy underbelly of 1947 Los Angeles - as Cole Phelps you’ll threaten a Jewish man with the gas chamber, arrest a paedophile instead of a clearly guilty father, quote Hamlet to a prop skull at the scene of a car crash, destroy thousands of dollars of property, and yell at a child whose mother’s just been murdered. Great fun!

The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings - Windows 

CDPR hit it out of the park with a fantastically improved sequel to 2007′s Eurojank diamond in the rough The Witcher, and really introduce Geralt of Rivia to more people for the first time with this game. A branching story that sees Geralt hunting Letho, the killer of King Foltest, and allying either with smelly hippy elven leader Iorveth and his terrorists who don’t appear in the sequel or the very cool but quite racist Vernon Roche and his special forces group, who are supporting characters in the sequel.

Alice: Madness Returns - Multiplatform, June 14th

A surprisingly charming, unsettling dive into the fractured psyche of the Victorian equivalent of an actual goth gf, Alice is a sequel to American McGee’s Alice from 2000. Surreal as fuck and absolutely drowning in atmosphere. Just don’t look at any of the YouTube comments on videos of the soundtrack. Rather bizarre show...

Duke Nukem Forever - Multiplatform, June 14th

Sometimes it’s best NOT to bet on the Duke. I bought this game to kick ass and chew bubblegum, and I did neither - DNF is fucking boring, and I blame it ALL on Randy Pitchford’s devotion to ruining things I like. DNF could’ve been brilliant - either embrace your heritage like Doom Eternal would eventually do, or make it into a “last hurrah” kind of thing where Duke realises he’s getting old and can’t kick ass forever. The greatest disappointment of the 2010s so far - but worse would follow with it. The King is dead - hail to the King, baby.

Deus Ex: Human Revolution - Multiplatform, August 23rd

The piss-tinted prequel to 2000′s excellent conspiracy RPG Deus Ex, Human Revolution is like smashing Robo-Cop into a world where Detroit is not a humanitarian disaster zone. Adam Jensen, the gravelly-voiced biomechanically enhanced security chief of David Sarif, is dragged into a world of American conspiracies involving FEMA death camps, the government enforcing martial law in US cities and massive Chinese conglomerates plotting to control the world. Just like real life! DXHR is my favourite in the series for its design, atmosphere and narrative.

Dead Island - Multiplatform, September 6th

Eh. Wasn’t that good. Notable for having the most misleading fucking trailer since Metal Gear Solid 2, but nowhere near as fulfilling upon release. An open world zombie survival game with a focus on melee weapons more fragile than your granny’s second hip. Oh great, now there’s a dead kid on my page. Thanks, Techland!

Driver: San Francisco - Multiplatform, September 6th

A game you literally can’t buy anymore, DSF was incredible to play when it came out and has only really gotten better with time. It’s still so unique for a driving game that I’m surprised Ubisoft have had the good sense to just leave it and not go pants-on-head retarded with the franchise since. Nick Robinson had to buy Subway gift cards just to purchase this game. 

Batman: Arkham City - Multiplatform, October 18th

Arkham City was so cool at launch and it still is today. A proper Batman epic with twists, turns, and the most addictive combat arena for years. This whole thing is gold from start to finish, except for the Harley Quinn DLC. I can’t even go into detail about it here, but I fucking LOVE this game.

Sonic Generations - Multiplatform, November 1st

Sonic Generations is the best Sonic game since 3 & Knuckles, but has now unfortunately convinced Sega that not only do people despise the Adventure games, they also really want to see Classic Sonic and Green Hill EVERY GODDAMN DAY. Generations is like a proper celebration of Sonic’s history, even including stuff from every reviewer’s favourite punching bag Sonic 2006 - I really like Generations and it has a stellar modding scene on PC.

Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception - Sony PlayStation 3, November 1st

The “finale” of the Uncharted series until Naughty Dog decided it wasn’t. Uncharted 3 may not be as tight as Among Thieves, but it’s just as enjoyable. As quipping invincible action hero Nathan Drake, you’ll ruin historical artifacts and “incapacitate” about 4000 guys in your quest to find Iram of the Pillars, chased by Cruella de Ville and her mercenary squad of a million faceless Englishmen. 

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 - Multiplatform, November 8th

God I was so excited for this. World War 3 never looked cooler, and then it came out - and it wasn’t that good. It didn’t feel as epic as MW2, not as well-written as MW, and not as interesting as World at War and Black Ops. Multiplayer was... fine? I think this is the point where most people realised that Call of Duty was basically downhill from here.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim - Multiplatform, November 11th

See this paragraph? You can read it. Another installment in Bethesda’s cross-franchise “Little Lies” series, Skyrim has been released more times than China’s created a pandemic. But it’s still really good and when you rub it the right way it comes all over your screen like a particularly excited storyteller, ready to point in the direction of adventure.

Super Mario 3D Land - Nintendo 3DS, November 13th

Yeah this was the point I decided I wanted a 3DS. It looked incredible and so fluid, and it really was! Playing this was great fun. That’s really all there is - I can’t be funny about it, nor overly critical. What do you want from me?

Assassin’s Creed: Revelations - Multiplatform, November 15th 

I didn’t like this when it came out - I thought the new graphic style was bad, Constantinople was dull, and the music was too different. Ezio was angrier, older, and the complete lack of any supporting cast from Brotherhood had me thinking this was a game that nobody wanted to work on - but now that I’m older, I can see this for how good it really was. Revelations blends the Ezio and Altair stories together, culminating in a satisfying emotional climax. 

Saints Row: The Third - Multiplatform, November 15

This video speaks for itself.

Minecraft - Windows, November 18th

There’s something beautiful about those early builds of Minecraft. Quiet, unassuming, and riddled with potential for exploration. I could talk for hours about the first time I was thrown into Mojang’s survival experience, about how I still get a bit weepy hearing Wet Hands by C418, about how shit-scared I still am of the mines and caves. Minecraft is immortal, and always will be. 

#ghost trick #dead space #nintendo ds #nintendo #ds #witcher 2 #la noire #portal 2 #portal #alice #duke nukem #deus ex #dead island #driver #batman #arkham city #uncharted 3 #uncharted #sonic generations #sonic #sth #mw3 #modern warfare 3 #call of duty #skyrim #todd howard #minecraft #saints row 3

[vaulthunter426]

Borderlands 3 | What we know...

Just because I’m not sure the best way to present this information, prepare for a long list of new features in Borderlands 3 with my comments because.... well this is my blog. I will not be discussing the two Vault Hunters we’ve seen gameplay of in terms of their action skills and skill trees.

Quality of Life improvements!

Borderlands has aged quite well, BL2 more than BL1 but we can go back to games almost a decade (and actually a decade) old and they still feel great and are tons of fun. After taking about a year hiatus from all Borderlands games, I came back after the Mask of Mayhem trailer and I found myself trying to roll or slide out of the way of charging enemies and merely crouched in front of them. After so long of this, I knew what I wanted out of Borderlands 3...

Sliding, Grappling, Ground Slams - A feature that I was hoping for beyond almost anything else were movement upgrades and boy we got them. The sliding adds a whole new dynamic to fighting a mob of enemies and the grappling opens up a plethora of verticality options. Be sure to be looking up high for hidden chests! The ground slams seem to be an upgraded, more visually appealing version of the ground slams from TPS. Zane cocks back an arm with a Digi-claw before slamming his fist to the ground while Amara leaps into the air slamming both fists to the ground (not to be confused with her Action Skill).

Vending Machines - Instead of manually purchasing each ammo type by spamming our select key on them, we can now purchase the max amount of ammo by pressing a key as we approach the machine, without ever entering the UI.

“Claim Lost Loot” - A new “vending machine” in Sanctuary III collects all the loot we didn’t pick up and store them until we access the machine. Once we activate it, all the loot comes spilling out onto the ground in front of us for us to check out and make sure we didn’t miss anything. No more lost Legendaries!

Sanctuary III is the first hub in the Borderlands franchise that features a unique room for our Vault Hunters! Our room will be tailored to the Vault Hunter of our choice with possible customization options. The wall holds a number of “mounts” where we can showcase our favorite guns as well as a couple spots for a relic, shield, and grenade mod.

Loot Instancing and Level Scaling - Is your buddy ten levels ahead of you? No problem! If you join the game of a friend who is a higher or lower level than you, your damage output will scale accordingly so no one is over or underleveled! Along with this will be loot drops. If you open a chest to a blue and purple rarity pistol, they will be at your level and ready to loot. Your friend will also see a blue and purple rarity pistol, but different manufactures and at their own level. You both can take both pistols from the same chest. All of these options have a toggle feature if you preferred the previous games style.

Claptrap as a General of the Crimson Raiders - It’s nice to know that the Crimson Raiders are continuing on after the death of Roland, but their priorities may be a bit askew if Claptrap is a general... then again maybe his title holds no responsibilities... all about the ego boost.

Lilith as Commander of the Crimson Raiders - Not all that surprising although I was speculating that maybe she had ditched our friends to deal with some of that pent up anger post-Jack. It seems like she has been broadcasting across the galaxy searching for new Vault Hunters, and maybe even “broadcasting” directly into Siren’s minds as a comment by Amara upon meeting Lilith went something like “Oh so you’re the voice in my head.” Sounds like our Guardian Angel...

Marcus - I have no doubt Marcus will be buying and selling us guns, but we do see that in person he will be our go to for SDU’s. This go around the currency used is money opposed to Eridium, similar to our BL1 days.

Moxxi - She still has her bar, this time with four different slot machines, possibly activated by a unique currency each, or rewarding different pools of loot.

Tannis - “Tannis’ Lab + Infirmary” read the sign pointing us toward our old friend, which leaves a noticeable lack of Dr. Zed on Sanctuary III. Was he a fatality of the ill fate that befell Sanctuary 2? Or is he on Pandora?

Ellie - Ellie takes position as our lead engineer / car provider for Borderlands 3, as we no longer have our dear friend Scooter with us (nice decal of him on the outside of the ship though).

Unlockable Vehicles - It looks like we will unlock vehicles as we progress through the story, similar to the Bandit Technical in BL2, but there seems to be World Event / Side Missions that allow us to come across unique vehicles parked across the maps that we can get in and return to a Catch-A-Ride station so that they are available to use any time we like! This means if your vehicle blows up before you can get it registered, you may be out of luck!

Alternate Firing Mode- Initially inthough a couple of gun manufacturers would have alternate firing modes but it almost seemed like every gun during the gameplay reveal had an alternate firing mode.

Hyperion Shields- I’ve been wondering how the shields would work for the Hyperion weapon and it looks like they are ADS activated.

Unique Dialog for our Vault Hunters - A feature introduced during some of the DLC for BL2, as well as through the entirety of TPS was character dialog unique to each Vault Hunter. It is most definitely returning for BL3 and I couldn’t be happier.

Unique Looting for our Vault Hunters? - When Amara opened a chest (really a repurposed car trunk) she punched it open in a similar fashion to Kratos in God of War. Although punching a chest open definitely seems like Amara’s style, I wouldn’t say the same for the other Vault Hunters which makes me wonder if certain chests will have unique opening animations for each VH.

Location: Ascension Bluff - This was the location title card that was on the projection screen after got the initial reveal demo which makes me wonder if the Children of the Vault Propaganda center(?) is on a map called Ascension Bluff. I could be wrong in thinking that, however I’m pretty positive that all of that was on Pandora.

Location: Meridian Metroplex - Some interesting reveals about the city we’ve seen from the trailers! The Meridian Metroplex is on Promethea, and has become an Atlas controlled city. For some this is great, for others not so much. Maliwan seems to be attacking the city with their new ally...

Locations: So far we have Pandora and Promethea listed as worlds we can visit but I believe it was Paul Sage also confirmed an Asteroid(?) map that will feature low-gravity similar to (but not quite the same as) TPS.

Tyreen + Troy Calypso / The Calypso Twins- These two are fucking Borderlands equivalent douche twitch streamers. They’ve leveraged this position (or vice - versa?) into being Cult Leaders for the Children of the Vault.

They have broadcast stations scattered around the galaxy that we can destroy / turn off as a world event style challenge.

Tyreen is a Siren who can leech the life and power out of other living beings. Being a Siren, she’s convinced her followers that she is their God - Queen. Troy is merely piggy-backing off the fact that she has all the influence, or it seems that way to me.

Tyreen has streamed her ability of sucking the life out of beings to her many followers, and to the Vault Hunters who she calls her most loyal follower yet.

What’s a cult without its followers? Instead of our typical “Bandit” enemies, it seems like the main enemy faction of that caliber has been rebranded to Fanatics.

Tyreen has struck a deal with the Head of Mergers and Acquisitions for Maliwan, a guy named Katagawa (some dweeb who hates / envies / is jealous of Rhys, but also makes sense why he wants control of Atlas) and so mobs of both the Maliwan Assault Troopers and the Fanatics will be fighting you at the same time.

Randy Pitchford has let on that Tyreen is using the bandits, and probably her Maliwan allies, as a tool to find the Vaults so that she can gain the power of the Vault Monsters.

Zer0 has left the Crimson Raiders and is working with / for Rhys under the Atlas corporation, at least while the money and weapons are good.

Crimson Lance became the Crimson Raiders after Atlas fell and they joined Roland’s cause in Sanctuary. Now that Atlas is being ran by CEO Rhys, they are called Atlas Soldiers.

New Element : Radiation - Irradiated enemies will take damage and are also more susceptible to other damage types. An irradiated enemy can spread the effect to other enemies surrounding them. Upon death, an irradiated enemy will reach critical mass and explode.

Barrels - Elemental variety barrels can now be melee’d to launch at enemies before shooting them and causing them to explode.

Pipelines -Certain pipelines can be shot to cause radiation spills, or oil slicks that can then be ignited to cause an AOE of damage.

Enemies / Mini Bosses - There will be more mini bosses in Borderlands 3, and the weapons they use against you can be dropped so that you can use that gun on future enemies.

NPC - Certain NPC’s will assist you on missions, like Lorelei and Zer0, and then can also be downed. You can revive NPC’s and they can also revive you.

Paul Sage (Gearbox Developer?) - Paul made the comment about the low-grav environments as well as stating that if you “beeline through the story” it will take around 30 hours. Upon questioning if the guns in the reveal were better than what we will find (because of the basically non-existant recoil) he stated that in the past they’ve worked there way up to really good guns in terms of level progression, but this time they wanted to know if they could “start good, and make it fucking awesome.” So yeah. Guns are gonna be fucking awesome.

And that wraps it up! A nice guide to catch you up on things you’ve missed or to remind you of some things you’ve forgotten. I make no claim to have covered everything we’ve seen, but these were some things that I took note of. Feel free to add your own bits and pieces I missed in the replies! Borderlands 3 looks amazing, happy hunting.

- VaultHunter426

#borderlands #borderlands 3 #amara the siren #long post #amara #maliwan #borderlands 3 spoilers #bl3 spoilers #bl3 #atlas #rhys #zero #claptrap #lilith the siren #the calypso twins #troy calypso #tyreen calypso

[big-meows]

Borderlands 3 final thoughts

disclaimers:

Fuck randy pitchford. I mean, obviously i feel like that goes without saying, yes I bought the game, i like the series and sometimes a bitch just wants to sink 70+ hours into a hyper-violent but ultimately goofy, non-threatening video game in a stressful time, sue me.

to that end, yes I played on easy. I also played solo. 

i play for fun and i dont fuck with build culture or w/e. i picked moze because i know her VA personally, and that was my only deciding factor.

I play on the ps4 so frankly i have no horse in the epic/steam debacle. I dont really care.

i didnt play bl1 but ive played the others.

spoilers. all the spoilers.

Anthony burch deserved better. I cant believe i have to see “at least im not anthony burch” in the year of our lord 2019 but its still happening out there. He deserved better, and this game is proof. maybe bl2 was “memey,” but it had a solid foundation and a great villain. TPS was also good, i think, honestly i only played it once and I dont remember it super well. Tales is the best in the franchise, and yes it counts, shut up. Burch’s absence is felt here. the story is weak, the villains are flat, and everything is written with the energy of a man who thinks everything that comes out of his mouth is fucking hysterical. like, im not even mad at “big dock energy” or the other stupid, already dated goofs, Im mad that every NPC was painful to listen to, or that rhys, arguably one of the most developed characters in the BL universe by virtue of the game he came from, was 90% mustache jokes. All these characters are like the versions that come out of fandom a year later, flanderized and already boiled down to their one token joke and repeated forever and eternity. You just met Lorelei and she seems cool, but man she REALLY NEEDS HER COFFEE AND IT IS HER ONLY DEFINING PERSONALITY TRAIT LOL!!!

Vaughn is The WORST, BRO

i dont think anyone really grows imo. Im particularly irritated by ava, who i very much want to like! but she has like three stock phrases she uses throughout the entire game, so after maya gets evaporated, you go talk to her and shes like “WOW this ship is cool, so much shit to steal!” like, you couldnt program her to sulk or not want to see anyone for a while? come on.

influencers as villains could have been really powerful if it had been introduced gradually, but mostly it was just obnoxious and too on the nose. troy and tyreen were very hollow. you get brief glimpses of humanity in them, but they’re so rare it almost feel like an accident. You get one(?) mention of their childhood before you finally stumble fully into the plot in the last few hours of the game. troy’s “betrayal” could be spotted a mile away despite it being hardly developed. I honestly dont even know if they loved each other or not? Was tyreen hurt by troy’s betrayal and subsequent demise? did troy look up to her and want to be her equal, or did he want out from under her shadow? i dont know. did i miss those echo logs? should the majority of the lore in a game be MISSABLE?

jack tracked well as a villain because you, over time, learned exactly how awful he was beyond “cocky corporate asshole who wants you dead” re: angel being his daughter. the twins are just....flatline obnoxious the whole way through.

sucks to be leda, apparently extremely badass but ultimately an afterthought who lives and dies offscreen only in recollections of the past.

sucks even worse to be fiona. i can tell you right now i wont be fucking with DLC unless it brings back fiona.

hammerlock saved this fucking game, he brings a certain dignity to the table that really helped level the tone after the rhys-katagawa stuff. Eden-6 was actually my favorite section of the game. loved hammerlock, loved jakobs, loved clay, and LOVED the jakobs estate. dunno why?? maybe because that level had me thinking “i could almost pretend im playing bioshock rn”

my GF absolutely hates the new claptrap. she’s right though. a claptrap that experiences emotions outside of “delusional exuberance” isnt actually claptrap

can my boy mordecai catch one single fucking break

is the vault hunter ever actually there? its really distracting how they’re never actually involved in cut scenes.

zer0 was too chatty. kind of kills the air of mystery.

gripes aside, i DID clock like 76 hours as moze, and i will probably continue to fuck around in it post game to clean up some extra stuff. might even start a zane of fl4k. the reviews promised it would be “more borderlands, nothing special” and thats what we got. it came at a time when i needed to remove myself from social media for a few weeks and lose myself in something mindless and violent, and it provided me with exactly that. its not elevated from BL2/TPS at all. the only improvement i can think of off the top of my head is being able to change quest objectives without entering a menu (thank god). it falls short in a series that always kind of had a low bar to begin with. disappointed but not surprised. i knew burch and eddings were both gone and that their absence would be felt. but i wanted to be gay and do crime anyway. so. you know. whatever. i got approximately what i paid for.

#borderlands

[incorrectborderlandsquotes]

What you excited most for with borderlands 3?

oh this is gonna be a long list

- first of all mordecai and baby talon (duh)

- the new vault hunters! i didn’t want any new characters because i thought it would be as messy as infinity war turned out to be but they seem to fit in pretty well

- the other planets (maybe we even get to visit the planets the vault hunter grew up on??)

- the calypso twins (again, duh)

- i high key hope we get to punch the maliwan dweeb and/or rhys

- mantling. you cant imagine my frustration everytime i dont make the jump just because my character doesnt know how to fucking climb

- battleborn references/easter eggs

- i’m no fan of randy pitchford but i love how he and the other writers/designers made borderlands feel like home again for me, i missed that feeling in bl2 and tps

#ask #anon #thanks for the question! #theres probably more but this is what i can think of at the moment

[gooberto]

You ever think about how Randy Pitchford is a fucking CEO despite being the most cringeworthy pathetic manchild on earth