#Did they actually make it better or am I just misremembering because I didn't have a computer for a while?

[the-punforgiven]

Yo did From buff the Marais greatsword in the most recent patch? It feels stronger now to me

#Did they actually make it better or am I just misremembering because I didn't have a computer for a while? #Because right now that thing is a fucking MONSTER with Godfrey Icon and Winged Sword talisman #Fucking MELTS Sewer Mohg #Melts dragons too if they stay the fuck still lmao #Pun's text Posts #Elden Ring

[katyspersonal]

Ayyyy 3 years of Bloodborneing! I am old now xD 🎉

I checked my @katyahina main, that existed many months before this blog, and.. damn, I really HAVE been into Bloodborne for 3 years! Not just that, but I've kept missing the proper day because I misremembering joining in Spring and not Winter. But.. yeah!

^ This meme was how my Bloodborne fan era technically started. It was the first thing I've posted on it, after about a month of passionate discussions with my friends who played it.. and then fishbowlcarnage, a super based Soulsborne blog that unfortunately deactivated year later, liked it and followed me instantly. I've just started to take first steps towards being "properly" online in social media after a seriously horrible and long period in my life, and having that sense of 'a cool person' giving me attention again, after all that time? Yeah, I felt like I could not pull the 'it was just a joke, I do not intend to post more Bloodborne!!' after something so significant. Look, I was very sad, and in shards from after leaving abusive relationship that were a huge part of my "isolation" from sane people. Still, I think it is funny that I might not even have stayed around in this fandom, had it not been a single person giving me a hand at the most important time. She never knew how meaningful it was for me, and never will now (genuinely hope she is fine, wherever she is..)

But afterwards I started drawing and loredigging more! This aesthetic and this type of storytelling was absolutely nothing like what I was used to, so it was very hard to whip my art into a more "serious" shape after years of round, cute and cartooney stuff. And even harder to connect so many vague hints and scattered lore scraps! I thought I was losing my mind upon discovering my first theories. Heck, I swear I learned what growing eyes on the inside felt like XD @val-of-the-north was there for me on every step on the way, he remembers me screaming at how bad it hurt my brain and how I was losing sanity dsfhjdfs In the end, my brain did get completely rewired in terms of media analysis and how I create things. I think I will never be the same. Admittedly, I am so, so, SO thankful to my former self for discovering all theories on my own, instead of instantly socialising and taking hot takes, theories and designs in the fandom as a reference. Talking with other fans significantly improved my interpretations and theories, but the best way to go is to first have your own version, so it can be refined upon interactions. Rather than just letting what's already there decide for you, you feel?

Granted, it's been painful 3 years for at least 5 significant reasons, and time flew really fast. Sometimes I regret having joined the fandom instead of being the 'unreachable' fan (the one that just posts theories and fanart without ever actually interacting with other fans). Watching the best, the most level-headed and interesting fandom in my life rot into a clown mess of 'cool kids' cliques, hierarchies and division, discourse, passive aggression, toxicity, gospel headcanons, snobbish treatment of any fan that didn't grab a beer with an "influencer" at the Discord and resentment towards fans who are actually passionate was PAIN. I hoped this kind of rot that kills every other small fandom could never touch US, but alas.

On the other hand, accepting that all good things should rot one day is important part of any engagement. Resisting what's natural end only makes things worse. ...that sounded like a very Soulsborne-moment. Besides, all pain (personal one or 'on behalf of my community' one) was worth the knowledge and insights on nature of people I've gotten! I understand so much more, it is only fair that the price was so heavy. ....and that also sounded like a very Soulsborne-moment. And at the same time, while I was raving like a grumpy old man about "better simpler times", even older fans came towards me to admit that actually this is not a novelty but just a more annoying form of it, and the community knew at least two previous 'cycles' of rising and then rotting like this. So in the end it doesn't matter, and some day things will improve again, only to get ruined again. ..... *sighs* and is not it a fucking Soulsborne-moment yet AGAIN.

I am still glad that I was able to find the interest in these awesome stories, and that I've found such good friends. I think in the end, the biggest reason why these games have such unreal grip on me is that they understand me like no other piece of media did. With all previous things I've been into, I was the one trying to understand them, but here, ironically considering my lore essays, it is understanding me. The despair, the endless existential crisis, the traumas, the doubts, the struggle to remember what's the reason to even live and hope is, observations on society I've had on instinctive level despite intellectual disabilities but could never articulate... the nightmares, too. But this is even better that I've found people who can understand me through how I understand it. I can't go back to how I used to socialise before the nightmare everything has been spiralling as for several years, the trust issues run far too deep and control me far too much, but I feel as alive as someone in my position could be here. And this matters.

#personal #thoughts #memories #it feels bittersweet

[animal-lover-forever]

(Hi, I wrote this in advance and.. you can ignore this if you want. XD I'm sorry for using they/them on you I default to it when talking about someone.. that probably doesnt look good for me actually. I just kinda blanked on you being female so I apologize!! Also I felt like it was addressing more than just you, others who have been in similar situations aswell. So yeah.. sorry for it being long. "If I had more time to write it, I would've made it shorter" or something like that.)

Hi, I am a trans person, I am VERY much all for trans people and everything being accessible to trans people. I just want to say something. I use neopronouns myself too, and weird names in general.

What Dakota said was a MISUNDERSTANDING! If they said it like "man I wish there werent so many types of math to remember" or something like that IT WOULDNT BE MATHPHOBIC?? (That is a horrible example, but I am mathphobic[/j I just hate math] and it was the first thing i could thing of)

It's not them being transphobic. They may have been able to phrase it better, yes. But arent they a kid? And also they will respect your pronouns and your gender. They'll call you whatever you want, it's just a simple misunderstanding. If they slip up, it's just as simple as misremembering. Its HARD remembering a lot, I cant remember a lot of people's name, I cant remember a lot in general.

No, just because they may have forgot doesnt mean they "didnt put in enough effort" or "arent trying" or something. Guys, GROW UP! I'm serious. One misunderstanding isnt enough to go around claiming someone as transphobic WHEN THEY ARE FRIENDS WITH MANY LGBTQ+ PEOPLE AND DONT GIVE A CRAP!

They aren't transphobic. Leave them alone.

Thanks.

And yeah, I probably could have worded it differently. But that was the best I could do.

I often forget that what I say, will come out differently. As in, people will hear it one way, but what I'm thinking is totally different.

A lot of that comes down to my autism and ADHD. But mainly my autism.

I often have trouble saying what I mean. And that makes things hard. Because when I say something, people hear it, but not as I'm thinking. (I don't even know if this makes sense. But this does prove my point at least.)

I also tend to talk without thinking. And this doesn't really help my case.

I have said this once, but I'll say it again.

If I have said something offensive, it was most likely an accident. Sometimes I say offensive things without realizing it. Mostly because I didn't think it would be offensive. Or I worded it in a way that makes it seem like I'm being offensive, when I'm not trying to be.

If I ever say something offensive, just let me know. I probably didn't even know I did. So just let me know, and I'll correct myself. And try to remember for the future.

I do understand that I can cross lines by accident. Crossing lines without realizing, is something I've done my whole life. I try and try to not cross those invisible lines. But I always fail to do so.

When a line is invisible, I cross them. Why? Because I can't see them. A lot of those lines are visible to others. But they are not for me.

If you can show me that line, then I can do a better job at not crossing over them. But keep in mind that I'm slow to pick things up. So even if you try to explain, it still might take me awhile to finally see the line.

But just know that I try my best to see the lines. Despite the fact that most of them are invisible.

#people ask dakota #dakota rambles

[inkdemon-whore]

So, the ink demon knows ink Henry isn’t the real Henry. Did that ever affect the way he viewed/treated ink Henry? For better or for worse? For example, did he dismiss him because he wasn’t the real Henry or was he more warm towards him because he wasn’t the Henry who abandoned him? Idk, being locked up with the near-exact replica of your creator gotta be an Expierence

ya ready to get sads?

when the ink demon was first banished back into the machine, there was nothing. then suddenly henry showed up.

for a moment he was relived, thinking henry came back to save him, but then realized "wait, if he's in here with me, the same thing probably happened to him. he's being punished like i am." and was immediately worried for henry's safety.

and then uh.... his hands... where doing things, he didn't want them to do...

the ink demon sees henry, standing there, in a pitch black void, no expression, other than a slowly building horror as the ink demon gets closer. the ink demon doesn't entirely realize what he's doing, only reaching out. he has no malicious intent, only concern and worry. and yet. his hands are around henry's throat... and he's choking him. and the ink demon wants to stop, but something's making him do it. he can't let go. in horror he watches as his creators face turns blue, and finally he dies.

the ink demon couldn't pull his hands away, or plead, or say he was sorry. for all he knows, his only friend just saw him as a monster killing him........ and died, viewing him as nothing more than a monster...

and then.... henry turns to a black inky nothing.... and shows up again...... and again, the ink demons hands reach out. and again, he chokes him. and again. and again. and again. and again. and again. and again. and again. and again. And Again. And Again. And Again. And Again. And Again. And Again. And Again. And Again. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAINAGAIN

and sometimes it's quick and painless, and sometimes it's slow and painful and torturous, and sometimes the ink demon is crying about it, and sometimes the ink demon is laughing about it, and sometimes the ink demon can't feel anything and is just doing whatever he's told to do by whatever/whoever is controlling him. only when the story is being added to does he have time to ever contemplate what is happening.

over time he notices details or inconsistencies. "he's right handed, instead of left. he has all of his fingers. he's not wearing the same shirt. his necklace is missing." little things that over time, someone might forget about a person, or misremember.

on occasion he's able to break form the story. anytime it isn't being added to for whatever reason, he acts "out of character", and does things like boarding up the ink machine room or just try to scare henry away. a part of him deep down doesn't actually want to hurt him. but other times, he's so fed up and tiered he kills henry right at the start. from trying to hold the studio door closed, to beating him to death right off the bat. at that point, he does so many actions in relation to henry that contradict each other, he has no idea what he actually wants for him.

all he knows is he isn't real. and if he isn't real, it means the things he's doing to him aren't real. he's not really killing henry over and over again. he's killing some fake version of henry. a fake version that doesn't have the same feeling towards the ink demon/bandy as the real henry had. weather or not this henry sees the ink demon as a horrific monster doesn't matter. weather or not the ink demon kills this henry over and over again doesn't matter.

or at least, it's better to pretend it doesn't matter. that it doesn't effect him, that it doesn't hurt him. because he'd rather distance himself from what he's doing, what he's forced to do, rather than believe it really is henry, and that he really is killing him over and over again.

the ink demon doesn't exactly hate this henry, but he hates everything he's made to feel about him, everything he's made to do to him. he hates what he represents, and as a result, tries to distance himself from him emotionally to keep from feeling any of it.

tldr;

he was warm at the very beginning, but he quickly became cold and distant. walls, disassociation, and saying "it's not real" is easier than believing you're killing someone you love over and over again, and that they might actually hate you, or be scared of you for doing so. especially if they probably don't understand this killing could be something out of your control.

...

ink demon: "my thoughts, feelings, and actions are all contradicting each other and at least one of those things is out of my control, QUICK! LIE TO YOURSELF! DISASSOCIATE! UH- UH-, MAKE UP A REASON AND CLING TO IT IT'S ALL I HAVE!! it's all fake and doesn't matter. perfect, good, great way out. now i don't have to think of the consequences of my actions or any of the emotional or mental ramifications. this way of coping can't possibly bite me in the ass later and my walls will definitely never come down to expose any of these traumas ever! :) hello proto-audrey number 828 (favorite)! i bet nothing emotionally damaging will happen between me and you!"

#batim #batdr #ink demon #henry stein #tw violence #ink trauma #ink emotional abuse #ink abuse #tw ship #the lovers are in turmoil- #al #talk #daddy ink demon au

[kim-little-sideblog]

Gaslighting sentences

People saying it may not (and most of the time are not) doing it out of a plan. Those aren't cold and calculative sentences, it can actually be pretty easy to think it up on the spot. They must not even fully realize how they are using them. It doesn't make it less bad.

"I never hurt you" - straight up making you not believe your own memories. Can also come with "why would you see me like this?" "That's what you think of me" "what did I ever do to deserve to be treated like this?" Etc

"it wasn't that bad" or "you are confused, it didn't happen like that" - making you don't believe in the accuracy of your memory, forcing you to the thought line of "maybe something did happen, they are not saying it didn't. But do I remember it right? Am I sure of it? Is it fair to accuse them without proof? What if I'm misremembering? What if I'm just overreacting and hurting them?" this line of thoughts can be unconscious and you may not notice it

"you have no reason to be angry for X" "you only study there is no reason to be sad" "that's not scary so why are you afraid?" "You shouldn't be scared of me" "you are overreacting" - telling you your feelings are wrong. Making you doubt you have the ability to feel the world "correctly" and making you think your feelings are not valid, justified or even there (if you feel something in a given situation, then that situation can make you feel something. There is no right way to feel the world)

"are you really sure of it" "when did this happen?" - asking for proof they know you don't have (because why would you have it? And if you had they would blame you for planning on accusing them), also if you are in an abusive environment/relationship you are prone to memory loss. You know something bad happened, but not always know what, why, or how. It's hard to know when too. Because you are always alert and on edge.

"Just ask X they know this isn't true" "everyone agrees with me" - it's easier to make you doubt yourself if it's only you against many. Also this makes you hesitant to ask for help because people can agree with them instead of with you.

"you are too young to understand it" "that's not true you are just being rebellious" - very often used. Makes you doubt your ability to regulate your own feelings and make your own decisions. Place the role of Decision Maker, Sensible One and/or Right One on them.

"you are lying and you know this" - making the blame shift on you. They say you know it, you must know it, you must be lying, they must be right.

"it's your fault" "you deserved that" "you knew this would happen" - shift the blame on you with bonus of making it seems like hurting you was the good and correct decision (it is not, yeah even if you did that thing you are thinking of, yeah even you are like that, yeah yeah they shouldn't have done it anyway. No no, it doesn't matter if they didn't know better.)

"I apologized" - that means a lot but mostly 1) no they didn't, but they want to make you think they did, they want you to think back what happened, to wonder if your feelings made you forget they already apologized. 2) blames you for not getting over it, they apologized why are you still talking about it? It doesn't matter that they did it again, it doesn't matter that they have no intention of stopping. Forgive and forget right?

#gaslighting #abuse #domestic abuse #toxic relationship #toxic parents #child abuse #emotional abuse #if you saw a typo no you didn't

[keyframe-moved]

honestly i am simply in the mood to talk about pokéspe so here i am! i have come with questions (and opinions).

1) what's your favorite arc of the manga? i need to reread the whole manga at some point because i know my favorite arc is influenced by nostalgia but At This Point it's probably ruby/sapphire, but followed incredibly closely by or tied with g/s/c and hg/ss. x/y is also up there.

2) what's your LEAST favorite arc of the manga? this is a bit of a tough question for me because i truly love almost all of the manga but luckily for me there's an almost in there. i simply do not enjoy the omega ruby/alpha sapphire arc. it does not vibe with me. it's not necessarily bad for any specific reason but i just don't click with the story or characters as much as usual.

3) do you have a physical manga collection? this question is mostly so i can gush about mine whoops. over quite a few years i've collected every arc from red/blue to x/y and my books are my favorite thing i own! unfortunately my x/y collection is all mini volumes which i personally am not a fan of, so i'll end up reselling them and replacing them with normal volumes when i can. as of now i'm on a break from buying new volumes until there are more normal volumes out.

okay that's it!! i hope the rambling from me is alright!

HIII sorry for the late response I was sleeping but fuck yeah pokespe infodumping moments let's go

1. oogh this is kind of hard . I want to say RGB just for nostalgia reasons and also because it's the one I've reread the most (partially because it's a genuinely really good read, partially because I keep telling myself I want to reread the original continuity and then leaving off at RS for whatever reason and restarting UBUDAMKJNID) . I think the best arcs, ones I would recommend to people who didn't care about reading the books in order for whatever reason, would probably be either RS or XY. RS stands better on its own a little more than XY though, iirc (XY has a lot of callbacks DNJISJJO). I also have a soft spot for FRLG just because it's kind of funny how fucking miserable and angsty it is for the good portion of it it's like the emo teen phase of pokespe

2. This one is Also hard but not as much. When I think "least favorite" I tend to try and think of something I actively dislike but I feel like the only contender here is ORAS because honest to God I like read it once when I was 16 and I cannot remember a single fuckign thing . That happened in it ? I have no feelings about it other than the art was nice 👍 DJSKNFNJKS aside from that uhh I think that B2W2 is like... the weakest? Which makes sense because of the whole . Hiatus thing . But idk by the time I finished reading it (I waited to read it until it was finished) I remember feeling like there was a lot of wasted potential with Lack-Two and Whi-Two's characters . Given Pokespe has made a lot of commentary in the past about corruption and, for lack of a better term, the literal enslavement of children and how it's Obviously Evil and Bad, I figured that they would have like... a more emotional character arc, like Blue or Silver did? But IIRC they just didn't, there was set-up but no payoff. It has the same energy as like... if HGSS had ended with Silver actually going back and training under Pryce . Nothing felt resolved with these kids' internal issues, they just went full circle. Maybe I am misremembering something but yeah i guess in terms of Pokespe arcs I'm very forgiving, and I'm usually like "this arc might be kinda bad but it has a lot of good!" but B2W2 had the least good and the most bad, so like . Yeah

Also honorable mention for both questions . HGSS . I cannot tell if it's actually good but I have a lot of mental illness about it . 8/10

And lastly, 3; I DO but it's a fucking unorganized Disaster Area rn. I also have a really weird assortment of books that's only really helped by me having half of the collector's volumes. I meant to get more but we asked for something really expensive for Christmas, so I might try to get my hands on the rest for our birthday ? Idk . I don't have a bookshelf so my Pokespe display is actually just... the top of my dresser? So I don't actually have a lot of space to uh . Put them . But yknow NDKMOAIJND If I have the energy later I might clean and reorganize the display so I can get a decent picture of it

Thank you for questions I am giving you a gold star sticker here u go

#i had to take a screenshot of your icon because tumblr was being weird #💛 speaks #ask

[fyeahnix]

Monster Hunter Rise - Early Thoughts

I've played MHR for about 20 hours since launch on Wednesday and I'm about at the tail end of Low Rank quests. Gonna talk a bit about my initial thoughts for the game.

Keep in mind, this is only my second MH game. My first was World (1041 hours), so any comparisons I make will ONLY be to World since that's my only experience. I am never going back to play the old game, I don't care, don't even bring it up.

With that disclaimer out of the way, let's blab.

The Setting

Right off the the bat, I absolutely fucking LOVE the setting. Outing myself as a former lowkey weeb here, as a child and early teen, I had a strong fascination with Japanese culture as I watched some anime and playing JRPGs. I took 4 years of Japanese in high school, and while my initial interest was rooted in my hobbies (yes, I know, it's embarrassing for me), my genuine respect grew as I learned more about the culture and history. That being said, I'm not an expert here, just a slight admirer.

I dunno what else to say except that I prefer this setting over World by like... 100x. No joke. This village looks like an actual community of people (THERE ARE KIDS AND FAMILIES) and not just...a bunch of ragtag individuals who jumped off a boat and started colonizing the land. And what's even cooler is that a lot of, if not all, the new monsters (whatever the fuck they are, I can't remember the entire list) are based off yokai or other themes in Japanese folklore. It's so fucking cool.

This entire setting just looks like it was made with a labor of love and like...how do you top this?

Customization

I had to look this up in case I was misremembering, but it seems like the customization for this game is mostly similar to World. Last time I went with a female character, because I didn't know any better. This time, I chose the "Male" body type and tweaked my character to look a little more feminine to go for that butch/stud profile I wanted. I genuinely hate the female armor in this series so seeing my Hunter walk around with full armor sets but still looking how I want her is such a fucking godsend. Probably going to be doing this going forward unless the devs bring in more parity with regards to armor skimpiness.

The Village/Hub

I appreciate the area being like...less than half the size of Astera. Astera in MHW was too fucking big with limited fast travel. I wouldn't be surprised if I spent a grand total of 15 hours here just because of how much walking I had to do. I eventually gave up and started using the Gathering Hub unless I needed to handle other business.

Having a much smaller area and the ability to fast travel around Kamura with next to no loading times means I spend less time here and more time out on a hunt like I should be. Love it. It's beautiful, keep up the good work.

Monsters

Rise, early on, already has a better variety of monsters than World did. World has too many flying wyverns. I know MH is a series with a LOT of enemy variety and it would have been nice to see that. I do understand there were some concerns over feasibility and performance with regards to getting some monsters in World like Lagiacrus, but eh.

Weapons/Armor

One thing that truly irked me about MHW was how boring and bland a lot of the weapons were. They were either branched off the Bone or Ore tree and they were literally just....bone/metal with little monster bits on them. When I looked at weapons from older games (this is 1/2 times I'm mentioning pre-World), they looked cool as fuck. Lots of inspiration into their designs. Thankfully Rise seems to return to that. The only monster I've seen so far to have those uninspired designs has been Pukei Pukei, which I'm sure is because its introduction was World but it still would be nice to see something more inspiring for it. I hope I'm speaking too soon and the design improves later on.

Armor seems about the same which is good.

Wirebugs

In MHW, we had the slinger and clutch claw, and while I think they were good ideas in theory, the execution was not at all great. Wirebugs in Rise feel pretty good so far and a step up to the slinger. My muscle memory is still on World so I'm definitely forgetting to use them often, but once I get proper practice in during endgame, I'm sure I'll get better.

I like the verticality of the maps so far. It feels fair with the Wirebug usage and not tedious. I want to explore! Verticality was awful in World, especially Ancient Forest, because if you fall, that's fucking GGs, spend 10 minutes climbing back up.

I'm hoping there's more to unlock here, too? I have the first switch skill for all my weapons. I don't know how many more there are, but I'm hoping if there are that they're good! I tried out the second one for SnS and absolutely do not like it lmao.

Rampage

This is....I dunno yet. My first Rampage quest was a confusing mess. Like I understand that it's basically just MH Tower Defense but still. Maybe my mind will change as I do more of them and get more comfortable with the format.

Quality of Life

There's a few things I've noticed about quality of life:

UI Changes

Pre-World UI looked pretty good from what I saw. World was....weird? It wasn't awful but the text and icons were small, the health bar was small, you could barely tell what your sharpness was, etc. And maybe that's because I played World solely on a 15.6'' laptop screen and not a 27'' monitor.

Regardless, the UI in Rise just looks so good imo. It's bright, colorful, informative and big enough to give you good at a glance info during a hunt. The sharpness meter was a huge upgrade to me over World because now I can actually TELL what my sharpness level is before it drops!

Maybe some people hate it or think it's bad UI design. When I look at it, I don't have to squint so that's good for me.

Fishing

In World, fishing was meh. I fished a lot for whetfishes towards the release of Iceborne because I wanted to try them over regular sharpening. In MHW, when you fished, you only had about 7-10 (I think mostly 10?) fish per pond and once those fish were gone, you had to leave the general area for a while to let them respawn. This sucked.

In Rise, you can just keep fishing non-stop apparently. You catch something and then another fish immediately spawns in. This is much faster and way less annoying.

Village Fast Travel

World had something like this but it was way clunkier and slower and didn't feel nearly as snappy. In Rise, you can immediately move to any specific area of the village nearly instantly with no load time (or at least none for my SSD)

Palamutes

I love them, and not because they're dogs. This goes a little in hand with the Wirebug point, but using them for an extra way to travel feels really good. They're fast as hell and I don't hate exploring as much when I have one. The Hunter isn't the fastest when running so having the extra speed to chase monsters or traverse land is great.

Once I reach endgame, I will more than likely retire the Buddies permanently like I did 100 hours into World. So I'm enjoying them while it lasts.

Final Thoughts 20 Hours In...

So far the game is great. I know it's technically the "handheld" title of the 5th Generation and more closely resembles older games, but even knowing that, I'm still having a ton of fun this early on. I'm hoping that feels sticks around.

#Monster Hunter #Monster Hunter Rise #it's long lol

[misterbitches]

some thots. having a bad time so this is rougher than usual. oh well

....

i guess he really does know hiim best cos if that was my mans (man specifically cos if anyone else did that id take it more srsly) i would be like oh my god ur singing me a love song? i would love it but i woudl SCREAM in embarrassment. UNLESS it was a really deep love song that's about us dying together.

like i want to eat ur skin type of thing (drain u nirvana) lmaoa but i really like this song it reminds me of that velvet underground song (the only one i know cos of juno lmao) and nico or whatever 'i'm sticking with you)

my adhd would be out of fucking control i had to spend my time listening to this looking around i kept getting distracted by a tissue and thinking "wow this song is nice but i wish it would end bc i am getting distracted" and lo and behold i paused it and i have to pee and i know it's gonna take forever to undo this

ok about 12m later i turned it back on and they kissed and then he bit the corn then that night li chen also lost his virgin teas after watching gay porn and being like "hm interesting" and he'll be like "i see, ur dick is not medium sized"

i'm honestly gagging i cannot at this 12 year old marrying his mom

beautiful theyre beautiful

ayea you fucking psycho we do too because he was 17 and we had to witness it (or well, other people did cos i didnt watch the show even tho wayne song is [BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEP] and i want him to [BEEEEEEEP] and ppl even liked it which is fine like i get it in theory but they put this in my eyeballs so i'm gonna make fun of it bc it's fuckin DUMB lmao like i can't I CANNOT and he said "u were so persistent" BITCH UR 30??!?!???!?!?!?)capi hve it on mute and i tried to get a screencap of li chen and mu ren like together and not just his face but i cant find the timestamp and seeing their faces as they get married is literalyl traumattizing i'm like scremaing at my screen going "HE'S 5 HE'S 5 HE'S 5" and every time theyre like "we acn live forever together" like no bitch ur bones rae creaking

also is the officiator white? if anyone knows why or if that's common i'd love to know more. EDIT: HE ISN'T I JUST THOUGHT HE LOOKED LIKE MOBY FROM THAT ANGLE

anyway here

i'm almost done with this fucking bullshit and i am in a really ould mood and usu they make it a bit better but imo it's kind of....annoying i guess balancing all these story elements and introducin gother couples (even in the periphery) since the story in itself can't focus. i feel like all in all the time spent with these two is a lot more limited and we get the feel for the rship because of their chemistry as actors, irl chemistry as friends and colleagues, and hopefully being happy and working on a good set. so it isn't the strength of the writing or production.

for some reason they get like less dynamic ways of being together which i think is part of their charm, they do things their own way, but the writers really should have substantiated this more. it's really just the way everyone in the show has managed to deliver these AWFUL story lines and production decisions (like seriously who the fuck was on costume? lighting?)

like maybe hot take but all the moments that are cringe and insane in the show are not pleasant, per se, because they aren't thought out clearly. so they're not a joy to watch in the normal sense but the actors are good enough to pull it off. i didn't cringe at the talks they had because it felt like actors like acting these lines out instead of us being embarrassed for it and you CAN TELL theyre embarrassed.

this is a huge kudos to the casting director and the actors and whatever crew that actually did a good job. i don't particularly like watching bo xiang and his grandfather husband not because of the content but because i feel like, to me, they're so awkward even though they have chemistry. i don't have that issue with xing si and his rapist brother boyfriend because watching them is actually really pleasant, it's intimate. this isn't to do with the story though because when it hits you how devoid this other person is and how stupid the situation is it changes (for me, for me, for me, this is all my opinion think whateverrrr u want im not telling u 2 ok!)

so truly kudos to this cast. idk if i'm misremembering here but imo the most cast appropriate series in this was crossing the line and close to you. one is a decent atmosphere and execution (yes even with that brother story line, notice the major key differences though because that's a sincere false equivalence. they try to execute power imbalances soooo badly and then fail every time but here's one meant to shock too and it was just likelmao ok girl?)

it may not make sense to say either in a writing way or for the character to do it but i believe that whoever the characters these people are supposed to be especially those super not well written on the page still get that message aacross (yong jie's actor is a good ex. not sure if i should ccongratulate him for having the worst job on earth and the worst character and his character is flat but. ostensibly they should let their actions speak for themselevs but what they do is they back themselves into a ccorner with unsuretyabout their characters or a dilemma that pops up they just want to excuse it. well guess hwat u couldnt do enough legwork. but to some extent the disposable side couple works here on a um "our eyes see them and get it" way

also to me it seems like they chose this story just to have this specific wedding. like it's a timely topic and i'm pretty sure like another provision? (correction? idk) was made WRT taiwanese same-sex marriage so it's topical but it isn't like a "papa and daddy" situation where they're interacting in it and there (for ex: the pride parade) and there being like real life terms and consequences. here it seems like they were like ah yes wedding ah yes dumb couple from modc bc we kiled off the other one sooooo (then outsource them to life love on the line u__u) then hamfisting in some fucking message which is funny bc

- despite the hints peppered in and the clear attraction they both acknowledge ur like ~not gay just him~ even tho...i mean i just. again they dont read over what they write i don't think considering. but wahtever.

- the only gay dude (verbally said) is with his rapist brother with an awful power dynamic oh or IS a rapist (gao) (or his brother but i think it was just a "im a psycho so it's him" thing unless they said it. in which case idc cos i wasnt paying attn but that's also not great) or i guess the wedding but like....that's also a ridiculously inappropriate and dumb relationship taht it's built on. i mean i don't really see much respect her so i dont particularly want to hear abt gay weddings being important when they didn't even utilize it in the story beforehand and have we ever. this is a huge indication to me that it was a reverse engineered chosen story beforehand (if it was one) or thought of

soooooo

so reversal of that....it didnt give us enough time to breathe with these two at all but for both of the actors they can capitalize what's on the page and the writers didn't. like their dynamic is very i give/you give like taking car eof each other etc that's why

again, no artist worth their salt will ever say their work meant nothing. that's a cover up. i'm sick of lazy production and then getting away with it claiming being subversive or attacking an issue by not doing anything. we show crazy shit all the time but it has a POINT and ur point is "i like the gays" then girl.....i mean it's not great

but the acting really carried it. i have a feeling if this series continues it might continue to use more experienced actors cos maybe the budget goes up but they also have less inhibitions now when it comes to acting. i like the way li chen expresss himself and teng teng too. i like anson a lot and there's some angles that did not do any favors and i think eh has to get more control of his body movements (bc he's SO LARGE and thin) but he wasn't bad at all and there were real human tears. of course i, personally, favor charles tu. he has more control over his body because he has...less to work with and he's a bit bigger and he was really great in this role. he's a himbo a bit of a meathead but you like him. you like them. there's some things i think they had them say and do that they wouldn't let happen if they stuck to the characters and the story (mainly liking that dumb idiot rapist)

what i notice is that the reprehensible actions people criticize others for in the show and in real human life lalways gets turned around. teng teng being surprised that this boy's grandfather boyfriend met him when he was a junior in high school and he's 12 years older and him apologizing for being shocked and then whatshisface going "ur better at it than most people" and then the convo about gao with whatshisface and then rapist brother comes to pick him up. they are admonishing gao but thinking that rapist brother is noble for doin gwhat he did (and oh rapist brother shows up) like the hypocrisy and the decisions are immense. so now it's like "guys see he's a great guy" like girl STICK TO SOMETHING but whatever so i live in this universe where muren and li chen do everything right and have lots of different interesting fun seex with all their friends. i would write this but i cannot i am dying

#history 4: close to you #history 4 #li chen x mu ren #a thot

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: [a box of stuff of his that got messed up in with Nancy's in the move 'cos your sister ain't talking to you either] Rio: [just like there you go] Buster: [thrilled about it] Buster: [takes it upstairs to the flat over said pub because he's staying there in protest fuck all of y'all] Rio: Lucky they've not got lodgers Buster: What can I say? Charmed life Rio: No doubt Rio: 'cos spare bedroom at theirs ain't so spare now Buster: Unlucky them Rio: Not really where my pity's going Rio: sure they'll find space for the punching bag Buster: No doubt Buster: It's as much a member of the fam as any of us at this point Rio: Sod Nance then Rio: stay on the sofa 'til Uni, like Buster: Not like she'd put up a fight Rio: Not like anyone's gonna bring another one to her Buster: Yeah that's the point Rio: Is it? Buster: Here 'cause she's down & out now Buster: Spent fucking ages on the ropes like Buster: No stamina left, is there? Rio: Sooo kick her whilst she's down/kick her out of the spare room Rio: Interesting idea Buster: Necessary more like Buster: But whatever Rio: Your solution Rio: Reckon it'll toughen her up Buster: Probably too late for that but when the alternative becomes walking on eggshells for the foreseeable future Buster: Have to try Rio: It's summer Rio: everyone's having a break, yeah Buster: So I should give her one, yeah? Buster: Way ahead of you Rio: Not just you Buster: If everyone else gives her any more of one we can just call this her party Rio: Nah Rio: she'd hate that Rio: heaven forbid Buster: Yeah well Buster: [back & hitting up the 18 year old hot barmaid like Rio: [when you're rolling your eyes so hard they gonna get stuck at the back of your head] Rio: be useful and get him another drink Buster: [When the girl loves it tho] Buster: Do you want one? Rio: Are you offering Buster: What was that just then if not? Rio: No telling Rio: go on then Buster: How many have you already had if you can't tell what 'do you want a drink' means? Buster: & Am I meant to guess what, like? Rio: It don't matter if it's wet and alcoholic Buster: 😂 Buster: Alright, brandy it is then Rio: See Rio: this is why I can't tell Rio: pisstake Buster: I'm always serious about getting pissed at fam functions Buster: You know that Rio: then don't get me fucking brandy or I've got no chance Buster: Then tell me what you want & stop trying to make me mind read Rio: You mean you can't? Rio: Disappointing Buster: You mean you want me to? Buster: Alright Rio: Don't take your time Rio: know what he's like if he actually finishes one before having the next lined up Buster: [Brings her the exact right drink obvs cos ofc he knows] Rio: [does cheers motion when she takes it] Buster: [& we back on our barmaid bullshit again cos gonna take her outside or upstairs at some point & need to put in that work] Rio: Does she know you're a child, like Buster: Firstly, I ain't & secondly, mind your own Rio: You are and how Rio: your attempts are blatant Buster: Care more about the birthday boy or my sister the other guest of honour Buster: That'd do for a start Rio: Take your own advice Buster: My distraction is sorted, cheers Buster: You're the one asking me how to get one Rio: I'm not, I'm asking if she knows she's down for some kiddie fiddling or what Buster: Ask her if you're so concerned, like Rio: Ha don't dare me Buster: We can play if you want Buster: Been a while Rio: Your distraction is sorted Buster: Not if you ruin it Rio: What I do best Buster: Yeah Rio: She's not going to fuck her employers grandson Rio: get a grip Buster: You wish she wouldn't Rio: You're dellusional Rio: at least if I do it you'll have someone to blame Buster: Nah, it's a summer job & summer ain't lasting much longer Buster: Her words not mine Rio: I asked for her life story less than you did Buster: Gotta get your fun while you can, babe Rio: That's what she's counting fucking a virgin kid Rio: you reckon Dublin's a smalltown but it ain't that small Buster: I'm not a virgin or a kid Buster: Try again Rio: You're both Buster: Not for ages now Buster: The past's gone, stop living there Rio: 😂 Rio: the big boy act is not convincing Rio: let's hope she is noncy or you have 0 chance Buster: 😂 Buster: I'd have sent you more frequent updates if I'd known you were this invested Rio: No need Rio: can see the show from here Buster: & I can see the colour of your eyes from here Buster: If it makes you this jealous, don't watch, babe Rio: Not meant to be looking Rio: or at least pretending you ain't Rio: remember Buster: Take your own advice Rio: I don't have to Rio: you said you would Buster: Ain't that the world's biggest cop out Buster: But fine Rio: I didn't want to stop Rio: it was for your benefit so act like it Buster: Get a grip Buster: I haven't done anything but act like it Rio: Keep it up Buster: You're the one watching me reap the benefits Rio: You could call it that Buster: I just did Rio: I thought you was trying to sound mature here Rio: probably calm down Buster: I don't have to try Buster: At anything Rio: 😂 Rio: don't lead with that whatever you do Rio: napoleon complex got you sounded younger than you are, kiddo Buster: I don't need your advice, you already did me a really big favour, like Rio: You need so much more help than I'm willing to give Rio: not got that samaritans gig yet Buster: That's the thing, I don't 'cause I fucked a girl when you left & haven't wanted to stop since Buster: Haven't needed to either so like I said, cheers Rio: [audibly lols] Rio: yep, bragging on numbers Rio: PEAK mature big boy moves Rio: Oh my God, McKenna Rio: [walking away from view once she's downed what's left of her drink] Buster: That is how it normally goes, yeah. Could almost be a direct quote Rio: I'm as impressed as they are, I guarantee it Buster: Nah, but you don't get to be Buster: Have to keep to my word Rio: Hardly Rio: at best you're on a promise here Rio: aren't married Rio: unless you're really committed to pretending you're grown Rio: very first school, it's sweet Buster: 😂 Rio: Still dramatic Buster: Says you Rio: Yeah Rio: focus Rio: know it's like a dream but keep up Buster: Talking to you ain't that much of a nightmare, don't do yourself down, babe Buster: & Well done for not openly crying or begging, like Buster: Maybe you do possess some self control in spite of everything Rio: Night's still young Rio: but nah, keep dreaming Rio: if there was anyone else here Buster: I will Buster: & If there was nobody else here, yeah? Rio: Exactly Buster: Exactly Rio: Exactly Rio: what are we talking about Buster: You're about to analyze my dreams, aren't you? Rio: Can Rio: so easy but hit me with it Buster: Only easy when you're in 'em babe, but that is often Rio: Good one Buster: They are good, yeah Rio: You're welcome for all the inspiration Buster: You don't get to take credit for my imagination Rio: Yeah I do Rio: you're a boy, it's a well-known fact you have none Buster: Bullshit Rio: It's true! Rio: they've done studies and everything Buster: Not on me Rio: Special, are you Buster: You know it Rio: You're funny Buster: & Imaginative Buster: Everything fun we ever did was my idea Rio: Bullshit 😂 Buster: True you mean Rio: Nope, definitely not Buster: Name one thing you thought of Rio: Getting drunk was my idea Rio: as was calling the adults when you when green literal so you owe me your life, actually Buster: Nah, you just agreed with me Buster: & that don't count as fun Rio: No way Rio: don't misremember Rio: woulda been if you did it right Buster: Don't you Buster: Just 'cause it suits you now Rio: I ain't Rio: cheek Buster: You are Rio: You aren't the only one who has fun, or can, I'm not gonna say that Buster: Don't then Rio: Don't say I ain't fun Rio: you know I am Buster: No I don't Buster: I told you, that kid's dead & buried Rio: You know I am now Rio: whoever you are Buster: Again, no I don't Rio: Shut up Buster: Maybe if I asked Miles he'd vouch for you, but we don't talk Rio: Still? Buster: What, there's meant to be a time limit on it? Buster: I beat him up & he ain't over it Buster: I can't say I'm gutted Rio: Worse than girls Rio: well, not at your school, obviously Buster: Whatever you say, babe Rio: What, you reckon you ain't? Buster: I don't care enough to reckon about it Rio: You are Rio: listen to me, no need to wonder Buster: Like I said, whatever you say Rio: You're so cute Buster: Yeah, I know Buster: But shut up Rio: Make me Buster: You wish Rio: Yawn Buster: Big surprise, you're bored & boring Buster: Again Rio: That's your bit Buster: Where? Buster: When? Rio: Here and now, baby Buster: Nah Rio: Mhmm Buster: Have another drink, you're bound to change your mind Rio: Jesus you sound like your dad Rio: that makes sense Rio: the whole act Buster: Glad you reckon you've made sense of something Buster: Must be a relief Rio: Not really but what can you do Rio: nothing, apparently Buster: You'll get over it Rio: You wish Buster: Not really, but what can you do Rio: Plenty Rio: if you'd let me Buster: Come on then Buster: Do something Rio: [Comes up and gets a drink from barmaid and is like come on then, to Buster, not her lmao] Buster: [Gives her an amused look but doesn't move yet cos not making it that easy] Rio: [is like 'how am I meant to do anything here?'] Buster: ['You're not meant to do anything, full stop. Figure it out'] Rio: [just a look like 'why not?' and then chatting to the barmaid in a way she can 'cos friendly bitch and making her come dance with her 'cos power move] Buster: [a look back that means you know why not but then a lol at the antics that he lets happen before cutting in & kissing the barmaid cos of course] Rio: [probably not a good idea boy your fam gon cockblock now] Buster: [better take her away quick before they realize, off you go outside you two, gods speed] Rio: Fuck you Buster: You can't Rio: Fuck you Buster: Fuck you just as hard, babe Rio: Yeah right Buster: Yeah right Rio: I'm going Buster: Alright Buster: See you around, Cavante Rio: No Buster: Like or not, I'm here for a while Buster: So probably Rio: Fuck off Rio: seriously Rio: stay to yourself like you want to Buster: Feel free to convince my parents I should Buster: Been there, tried it myself Rio: Feel free to drop dead Rio: not doing anything for you Buster: You should've let me if you feel that strongly Rio: That boys already dead and burried Rio: how many times have you dramatically spewed that Buster: Maybe two Rio: Enough you don't need to chat it now Buster: I'm not, you are Rio: Yeah you are Buster: Nah, I'm saying, I bet you wish you didn't save me back then Buster: If only you could see the future, yeah? Rio: You wish Rio: You want everyone to hate you so bad Rio: have to wait 'til you're grown to fuck off and leave everyone behind Buster: Nah, Nance has fucked off already, that's one down Buster: My odds are good on not having to wait Rio: make you feel better when they forced you on the plane yeah Rio: diddums Rio: how 'bout you fuck her and get onto smack Rio: that's it, or death Buster: All the better for seeing you, obviously Buster: Very inconsiderate of her to turn out gay, like Buster: I'll have to kill myself, I guess Rio: Yeah you'd never Buster: Why not? Rio: Love yourself too much Rio: sadly Buster: All the more reason to do it myself, make it worthy of me Buster: & Really dramatic, of course Rio: You're all chat Rio: and you'd stay alive just to spite me Rio: twat Buster: You ain't that special, remember? Rio: Neither are you but doesn't stop you reckoning Rio: so leave it out Rio: you're a shit liar for someone who does it all the time Buster: So are you Rio: I'm not lying Rio: you 2 for 2 now Buster: Tell me again how I'm not special or you hate me Buster: It's a lie Rio: I do hate you right now Rio: and you aren't special I just fucking Rio: I don't know Rio: it's a me issue, you've said it enough Rio: it's not about you Buster: You do know & it is about me Rio: Why are you doing this now Buster: Why are you? Rio: Because I fucking wanted to Rio: you don't so stop Buster: I'm giving you exactly what I said I would Buster: What you asked me to Rio: How is that what I asked Buster: You said stop this Rio: I said come on Rio: and now you're fucking taunting me 'cos why Rio: it's fun Rio: you want me to hate you Buster: You wanna hate me Rio: Bullshit Buster: Every time you say it, I can feel you fucking hoping it'll cancel out how much you want me Buster: Well, now you don't want me anymore Buster: You're welcome Rio: You're an idiot Buster: I'm too sober for your stupidity is what I am Rio: Don't you dare Buster: I do dare, deal with it Rio: Again Rio: 2 for 2 so no you fucking don't Buster: Again, whatever you say babe Rio: It's known Rio: was right Buster: Yeah? Rio: Yep Rio: pussy Buster: You ain't been right about anything other than how shit our kiss was Buster: I learned my lesson then, that's all Rio: You're full of shit Rio: why keep talking Rio: I don't believe you or anything you say Buster: Then we finally agree about something 'cause that's exactly how I've felt about you since you ruined my birthday Rio: Yeah, why would I make myself look insane just to be lying Rio: Fucking good one Sherlock Rio: you're gonna be a shit lawyer with that intuition Buster: All I need is the ability to bullshit & I have that Rio: You don't even need that Rio: plenty of second-rate rich boys playing dress up Rio: swap the badge for a robe, yeah Buster: Good thing too, at least it'll take you a while to be done fucking them all Buster: You're already so bored, like Rio: Oh my God, you still care about that Rio: like I ain't been whoring around my own postcode for a year since then Buster: Such a dramatic pussy so obviously Buster: You fucking hurt me Rio: I know Rio: You hurt me right back Rio: and still are Buster: What did you expect? Rio: Not you to keep this up forever Buster: All I've kept up is the distance you all but fucking begged me for Rio: I don't want it Buster: You think I want it? Rio: yeah Buster: Don't be stupid Rio: Don't Buster: Fuck you Rio: what Buster: You can say what you want, fucking throw yourself at me in there & I can't tell you what you already know Rio: I don't know that at all Rio: and even if I accept it now and try and believe you, you'll take it back later and Buster: Don't ask me to & I won't Rio: Okay Rio: promise Rio: don't need to cut our palms but I swear Buster: I ain't fucking doing that my dad's scar is really ugly from when he & Joe did & for what? Rio: 😂 Rio: I said we don't need to Rio: can still be a hand model if you want, not gonna take that from you Buster: Cheers Rio: alright but is that a deal or no Buster: It sounds like you want blood to me babe Buster: Hold on, I'll break this glass, like Rio: Do not Rio: and I don't want you to kill yourself either Rio: or die just in general Rio: btw Buster: I don't want you to whore around your postcode, but things happen Rio: Mixed messages because you definitely told me to but Buster: You told me to drop dead Buster: At least I gave you an easier one Rio: Well alright, if we're changing our minds here Rio: though rude that's the only thing you wanna take back, just saying Buster: I never said that Rio: you said I should go whore round, now you're saying nah so Rio: yeah Buster: What I mean is, there's loads of shit I wanna take back Buster: Not just that Rio: Oh Rio: me too Buster: But I can't & neither can you Buster: Only thing I can't do, but still Rio: Sure you can Rio: people do and say shit all the time and take it back Rio: easy Rio: what's hard is not doing and saying it again Buster: Yeah Buster: Alright Rio: I'll expect it in writing Rio: take your time Buster: Fuck off Buster: Just 'cause I'm capable of an essay unlike my sister, don't mean you're getting one Rio: Just adding to your workload here Rio: be nice whilst you're Rio: not ahead Buster: Fuck that it's summer Buster: Give me a break Rio: Then see me Rio: have fun with me Rio: you're stuck here anyway Buster: Rio don't Rio: Why not Buster: Come on Buster: You're gonna make it even harder for me, really? Rio: I just Rio: I really don't want to hate you, okay Rio: don't make me, that's hard Buster: It's easier than not Buster: Harder to be around each other if we don't Rio: Barely Rio: I nearly just bottled you Rio: how is that better Buster: That pain is piss easy to handle compared to what you could do Rio: It don't feel any easier to me Rio: feels the same Buster: 'Cause I can't bottle you Rio: well, I can't actually you, to be fair Rio: or random girls just 'cos Buster: 'Course you could Buster: You'd have to stretch if you wanna get me over the head, like Rio: 😂 Rio: Shh Rio: it's very much illegal, even when you're asking for it Buster: Or stand on a barstool Buster: Or the bar itself Rio: not that you're thinking about it Rio: weirdo 😜 Buster: I think about you loads, get over it Rio: don't wanna Buster: If I have to, then you do Rio: I never said you have to Buster: I'm saying it, I have too much shit to do to be distracted by you constantly Rio: okay but Rio: little bit Rio: all work no play Rio: come on Buster: I play as hard and you know it Buster: Even when you are there trying to fuck everything up Rio: Exactly Rio: so don't try saying you've got no time for me Buster: I never said none, I said not as much as how often I think about you & then my thoughts want me to give you Rio: I know Rio: I get it too, I mean Buster: Of course, I got really hot Buster: I was a cute kid but Rio: Alright Rio: 😏 Buster: Alright what? Rio: We don't need to talk about how hot you are Buster: It won't be a two way convo, just tell me Rio: You know already shh Buster: Come on Rio: You're gonna be mean Rio: I can feel it Buster: Just say it for me once Buster: You never got me a birthday present Rio: Fine but if you're really annoying about it you're getting muted okay Buster: Or bottled Rio: Yeah you really are wishing now Rio: but you're hot Rio: really hot Rio: you know you are Buster: Fuck Buster: I know you are Rio: ha Rio: I've thought about you saying that loads Buster: What else do I say? Rio: Lots of things Rio: but don't waste loads of time talking, wouldn't be very true to character would it Buster: 😂 Buster: Obviously not Rio: Jesus Rio: I'm glad I left Buster: I'm not Rio: You left too Buster: Well, I ain't proud of that, am I Rio: Yeah Rio: it is what it is Buster: Nah Buster: It ain't that passive, it's what I made it into, deliberately Rio: I know Rio: I mean, obviously within your rights to do it Rio: shitty or otherwise Buster: I'm sorry Rio: Yeah Rio: thanks Rio: it's alright Rio: well it weren't but apology accepted, basically Buster: Where are you? Rio: Omw home Rio: nearly back Buster: Well, that deserves another apology Buster: Nearly Rio: it's okay Rio: gave him his present so won't be as gutted, like Buster: You can still be 👑 Buster: Thank Christ Rio: Honestly Rio: can ruin my night but not my rep, like Buster: I'm being sent home. Home home, not holiday home so no danger to your rep, just mine Rio: Why Rio: I mean Rio: you've been on worst behaviour all round, apparently but what was the final straw Buster: Mum's on one about the barmaid Rio: How mad will you be if I say told you so Rio: just wondering Buster: How mad would you be if I tell you I told her it was worth it Rio: you've actually got a death wish Rio: you know that's gonna make her mad, that kind of thing Buster: Why else do you think I announced it at perfect everybody overhear this volume? Rio: Why are you so mad at them? Buster: How far back do you want me to go? Rio: Alright Rio: over Nancy moving then Buster: They're letting her, ain't that enough? Rio: You'll miss her Buster: I won't Rio: What then Rio: isn't it a good thing for you, you won't have to worry about people talking shit on her, having to smack lads for her Buster: Don't mean I'm not angry she gets to move countries but I can't stay home alone, 'cause that's bullshit when I can take care of myself & she can't Rio: She's living with nan and granddad Rio: they're not just leaving her to do what she wants, like Buster: As good as Buster: How long before she's at ours, I'm calling it Rio: Nah Rio: they'll be more involved than your parents are, no offense Rio: so you still come off better Buster: We'll see Rio: You can be angry still Rio: and miss her, even a bit Buster: Cheers for the permission, like Rio: Any time Buster: How do these parties get more shit with every passing year, have a word Granddad, fuck's sake Rio: 'cos we get older but still get treated like kids Rio: and you're moodier, somehow Buster: You were calling me a kid not long ago, now you're gonna call 'em out for doing it, yeah? Rio: Not saying they shouldn't or that you ain't Rio: just why it's shit Buster: Very diplomatic Rio: mhmm Rio: you don't deserve me being mean about it, soz Buster: So you're only gonna be nice from now? Rio: Diplomatic Rio: you don't wanna be friends Buster: I don't wanna disfigure my hand with a blade Buster: If you wanna make me a better offer Rio: Did that too Rio: but seriously Rio: it was weird not talking for all that time Rio: barely talking anyway Buster: Yeah Rio: just don't stay away that hard yeah Buster: How hard then? Rio: as hard as you wanna Rio: but actually Rio: don't pretend Buster: What if I actually don't wanna? Rio: then don't Rio: it's just talking Rio: nothing wrong with that Buster: Okay Rio: Good Rio: I missed you Rio: sometimes Buster: Only when you were awake Rio: 😂 Rio: not dreaming about you, no? Rio: basically #humble for you Buster: That's what I was saying, those hours when you can't dream about me must have been the absolute worst, babe Rio: Oh god Rio: keep chatting, might cure me 😏 Buster: You know what the cure is Rio: Yeah? Buster: Eat cheese before you go to bed & have nightmares instead Buster: That or drink brandy til you can't dream Buster: Might die but Rio: 😂 Rio: I'm sure we don't have any of that filth Rio: 'less you can cook with it, hmm Rio: I'll see Buster: You can Rio: Get you Buster: Crêpes Suzette being the classic Rio: You're funny Rio: don't think I'm gonna go to that trouble when I could just stay up Buster: I'll come make them for you, call it a peace offering Rio: Party's gone that downhill 'cos I left, yeah? Buster: To be honest Rio: Guess your friend left when you embarrassed her along with your ma? Buster: She's not my friend Buster: But obviously Rio: well you know what I mean Rio: at least its a summer job Buster: I wouldn't have gone there otherwise, don't need to run into her every time I get dragged back here Rio: 🙄 Rio: how you getting 'round that at home then Buster: By being upfront about it Buster: No big words though Rio: Brilliant Buster: It does work brilliantly, yeah Rio: even if we're friends, not one of your mates, boy Rio: don't be bragging Buster: You asked & I answered Rio: Mhmm Buster: Not like I was offering you a spreadsheet with the figures Rio: Shh are you coming or not Buster: Do you want me to? Rio: Yes Rio: I'm hungry Buster: Then yeah Rio: Good Buster: I won't say a word about how much faster it'd be for you to just feed yourself Rio: Better not Rio: know you have hired help Buster: Not a cook Rio: you offered Rio: I'll be grateful Buster: When you've tasted it, you'll be more than grateful Buster: But I gotta get there first Rio: You can do it Rio: I believe in you Buster: Don't run out of compliments before this cab has even set off Rio: Better to do it now Rio: less risky Buster: No risk, no reward, babe Rio: I'm paying for crepes in compliments, am I Rio: sure that's what you want? Buster: The more praise I get the better I perform, it's up to you how good you want this meal, like Rio: That doesn't surprise me even a little, babe Rio: keep it in mind Buster: Why should it? It's true of everyone Buster: I also happen to thrive against the odds too but I'm just that good Buster: Keep that in mind Rio: Most people, even more most blokes Rio: What odds? You're gonna have that kitchen all to yourself Rio: and all the fancy ingredients you need Buster: Are you trying to bullshit me that you don't love encouragement as much as anyone, don't make me laugh Buster: The odds that the smell of brandy could make me wanna puke, for one thing Rio: I dunno Rio: can be a bit much Rio: depends Rio: I'll hold your nose for you Buster: In the wrong hands, anything can be a bit much Buster: You just wanna use yours to hurt me Buster: If I leave with a broken nose, we ain't friends no more Rio: Yeah, exactly Rio: that's why I'm done with schoolboys Rio: Promise Rio: you're too pretty Buster: I ain't leaving school for you, my mum would do more than break my nose Rio: 😂 Rio: Enough of a reason not to Rio: Maybe Buster: Until you give me a more worthwhile reason to do it Rio: Like I need to Buster: Like you want to Rio: You still reckon it's me stopping us Buster: I'm stopping us 'cause you asked me to, so technically yeah Rio: Ugh Buster: Tell me not to Buster: Take it all back Rio: You already said I can't Buster: When I said that, I was angry Rio: so was I Rio: and a whole clusterfuck of other emotions Rio: when I did it and all the shit I've said since Rio: including when I told you to stop and leave Buster: And now? What do you feel like Rio: Happy that we're talking Rio: that's all I know Buster: I've missed you, do miss you Rio: I know we never saw each other loads but Rio: not being able to talk to you was Rio: shit Rio: and knowing if I did you'd just say I was drunk or desperate or whatever the fuck Buster: I know I ain't easy to talk to Buster: So I'm happy too, that you wanna Rio: You aren't that bad Rio: give it a good shot, like but you know Buster: Come on Buster: I'm as much of a cunt as I can be Rio: Yeah well I'm tough Rio: don't take it personal Rio: sure loads of people hate you, babe Buster: Nah, they love me Rio: 😂 Rio: Okay Rio: you're an idiot Buster: I'm serious, being a cunt in Chelsea is like being a pub owner in Dublin Buster: Well loved Rio: Whatever works Buster: Like I said, it all does, brilliantly Rio: On them Rio: but that's not what really matters, like Buster: Of course on them, this is where I live & these are my people Buster: That's what matters, there's no point thriving in Dublin for the few weeks I'm there & not being able to hack it here Rio: Not what I mean either, really Rio: but least it makes sense Buster: What do you mean then? Rio: What about you, is what I mean Rio: not just playing to whatever crowd you have to Buster: What about me? That's what success is Rio: and that makes you happy Buster: It makes me successful Rio: What's that then Rio: if not happiness Rio: and money, obviously Buster: It's an assurance that whatever passing bullshit, happy, sad, pissed off, whatever I've got going on, I'll still be at the top of my game Rio: Hmm Rio: okay Rio: I get it Buster: It ain't a difficult concept Buster: Obviously you understand it Rio: Nah Rio: I just don't understand how everything you think is success brings that Rio: actual, definitely Rio: but surrounding yourself with cunts so you can be top cunt? Rio: that's just bullshit init Buster: If you can adapt & endure you'll thrive. Anywhere, under any circumstances, over any cunt Rio: Suppose that's true Buster: It don't matter who I'm surrounded by, I'll be top Buster: These are just the present cunts Rio: What about really nice people Rio: I know you ain't going that hard the other way Buster: Nice people don't run the world, babe Buster: They get shit on by it Rio: Nah Buster: Ask Nance Rio: That's not nice Rio: that's insecure and not able to stand up for yourself Rio: no offense, Nance Buster: You're the one who called her the nice twin Buster: I could happily slag her off all day Rio: Mostly to highlight your evilness Rio: but not gonna sit here and call her a bitch, obvs Buster: 😈 Rio: 😏 Rio: I wish Buster: What are you wasting a wish for? Rio: when you're such an 😇 wishes grow on trees Buster: Nah Rio: Which part of that are you doubting? Buster: The part that gives you a halo Rio: Oh, so you were being that rude Buster: Being that honest more like Buster: I know you Rio: Earlier I was no fun and now I'm hellbound Rio: which is it to be, babe? Buster: Depends Rio: On you Buster: On you Buster: I told you before, I ain't gonna be your scapegoat Rio: I just know that if I end up in hell, I'm blaming you Rio: 🤷 Buster: If you wanna go to hell, I'll take you there, babe Buster: But I could just as easy take you to heaven Rio: You are such a tease, McKenna Buster: That depends too Rio: Nah Rio: but that's okay Rio: I don't not like it Buster: I know Rio: Partially Rio: I don't think you know just how much I really don't not like it Buster: You reckon? Rio: All you've got is that famous imagination of yours Buster: Give me more then Buster: If you think you can Rio: I know I could Rio: question is should I Buster: I already said yes Rio: Not exactly asking nicely but Rio: like that too Buster: That I really do know Rio: It's pretty obvious Rio: why I like you Buster: Tell me something that isn't Rio: Alright Rio: Hmm Buster: & If its gonna take you this long, let me in Rio: you can't let yourself in? Rio: talk about poor service Buster: You invited me, let me in Rio: Fine, fine Rio: coming Buster: [when you just standing there at the door looking fresh to death] Rio: [when you're obviously admiring but playing it cool like kitchen this way] Buster: [when you 'brush past' her to get there not cos you wanna get there 1st but cos you want your bodies to touch] Rio: [when you've got all bowls and shit out like a nerd] Buster: [when you sit her on the counter so she can watch this masterpiece come together & you shamelessly wanna touch her as much as you can] Rio: [just dying slowly over here and 😳 but you can pretend it's hot in kitchen 'cos always is] Buster: [okay but teasing her with the brandy cos big mood so they have to basically playfight about not smelling/drinking it] Rio: [so innocent but the tension lawd] Buster: [when the only reason you don't kiss is because sauce on the stove about to burn or whatever & reminds you what you're meant to be doing] Rio: [#seriouschef] Buster: [gotta impress the bae which is why you also swig some brandy from the bottle like look] Rio: ['if you're sick it's really gonna put me off all the effort you've put in, like'] Buster: [is 😏 cos cocky bitch getting back to serious chef-ing] Rio: ['I'm gonna go get changed' 'cos still in party tings and just giving that mental image to him tah] Buster: [helps her down not cos he needs to but cos he wants to & the eye contact as he do because] Rio: [now you get to be 😏 but go 'cos we cockblocking you chef boy] Buster: [when you watching her go & then thinking about those mental images so hard that its a miracle the kitchen isn't on fire] Rio: [ha awkward like soz cali] Buster: [when you tell her to hurry back & you can pretend its cos this don't take long cos it don't but also we know] Rio: [pretend there are 'fit options here 'cos even your comfies are hot that's just the life she's forever living] Rio: 1 or 2 Buster: If you reckoned 1 was good enough you wouldn't have shown me 2 Rio: Numbers were randomized but 2 it is Rio: One sec Buster: You don't leave anything to chance Rio: Gotta go out there and make shit happen or it never will Rio: yeah Buster: Yeah Rio: anyway, was accounting for your bad taste rearing its head 😉 Buster: Expensive taste is only bad taste if you're poor & jealous Rio: and I'm neither Buster: So you've got nothing to worry about Rio: doesn't mean you don't have to sell me on this meal still Buster: It'll sell itself Buster: One taste Rio: Let's see Rio: [coming back down] Buster: [Such a LOOK at her] Rio: [Sitting back on the counter 'cos mood always casually maintaining eye contact forever oh you two] Buster: [Asks her if she wants to do the bit when you light the brandy at the end cos literally asking if she wants to play with fire the SYMBOLISM bye] Rio: ['Obviously' cos] Buster: [hands her a match cos what a fucking mood] Rio: [when you're just having a moment over the flames like] Buster: [and then its time to serve this shit so he'd do all the gentlemanly shit of pulling her chair out etc] Rio: [when you're loling but also loving it and just open your mouth like ok feed me] Buster: [when you know he will & does] Rio: [casual food porn happening here lmao] Buster: [probably don't come back that exact second cali fam] Rio: [caleb so sad like food is MY love language] Buster: [when you're waiting for a review tho] Rio: [when you've been making noises to not even be a tease about it so you're like 'okay, it's good'] Buster: [smug af but also so into her everything rn] Rio: [holding out a forkful like you want some] Buster: [a look cos we both know what he wants some of lol 'yeah'] Rio: [just feeding each other, getting this out the way or whoever walks in would KNOW honey] Buster: [sharing a chair because he weren't sitting down to have any & CLOSENESS] Rio: [y'all gonna jump a foot in the air when the fam roll in, at least a screaming child would give you chance to get off each other] Buster: [literally she's gonna be on his lap if they don't hurry up] Rio: [when you're like 'you've got some there' as a blatant excuse for more touching] Buster: [kill me now tbh] Rio: [gotta bring 'em in, so mad, never mind how mad y'all are gonna be] Buster: [how is it not obvs to cali how turned on these two are rn like hello I know you've got your hands full but] Rio: [also know she's fuming 'cos usually a helpful bitch but she's just there like hell no, also looking at him like what you gonna do] Buster: [when you just leave cos there's no way to explain gotta use the chaos to your advantage & make her answer questions if they get asked such a prick move] Rio: 😒 Buster: That better not be directed at me Rio: Nah Rio: stick it in the family groupchat but might be a bit blatant Buster: More blatant than what they walked in on? Buster: Unlikely Rio: They aren't all that observant Rio: well, 'less they wanna be but should be fine Rio: didn't say anything, still haven't so Buster: Good Rio: Yeah Rio: I think so Rio: still 😒 Buster: At least you ain't gotta catch a plane tomorrow with a 'disappointed' dad Buster: I did him the favour of not having to unpack all my sister's shit but instead of thanking me, it's a lecture I'll get Rio: That'll be fun Rio: 'least it ain't a long flight Buster: Just enough time to say don't fuck 18 year olds til you're at least 16 Rio: Probably doesn't warrant the whole flight but you know Rio: 6/10 parenting Buster: Gotta factor in all the time spent in silence before & after though Rio: You're too alike Buster: Shut up Buster: I'm younger, hotter & better Rio: Save it for your rebuttal Buster: It packs more of a punch if I hit him with a fresh take, he's been aware of all that for years Rio: Lemme know when you come up with a zinger, like Buster: 'Course Rio: I'd help but gotta silently come for my own now, obviously so Buster: I don't need any, don't worry Buster: Besides, it'd piss him off more if I hadn't learned my lesson so I'll probably just join the mile high club Rio: 😂 Yeah unless there's a closeted horny businessman doing his commute too, I highly doubt that Rio: that flight's a glorified bus trip Buster: Don't underestimate me, babe Rio: 🙄 Buster: 😏 Rio: Shut up Buster: Make me Rio: That was the plan Rio: more or less Buster: So make a new one Rio: You should've stayed Rio: could've Rio: they're busy they never notice what I'm doing Buster: If I was thinking, yeah Buster: I would've Rio: Annoyed at you Rio: might bust out the face, actually Buster: It's your own fault Buster: Be annoyed at yourself, like Rio: You're not annoyed about that Buster: Annoyed ain't the word, you're right Rio: Got lots of time and brainpower to think of the word now, ain't ya Buster: Yeah Rio: you back home yet? Buster: Nearly Rio: Shame Buster: It doesn't have to be Rio: How? Rio: You're going back tomorrow Buster: I'm here now Buster: I know I've got more imagination but use yours Buster: What do you wanna do? Rio: Finish what we started Buster: So come on Buster: Take me through it, how would it have gone? Rio: Well I was about to sit on your lap Rio: and you were about to feel how much I wasn't ready for you to go Buster: You'd have felt how ready to go I was Buster: Shame I had to leave instead Rio: It really is Rio: Still one last mouthful I wanted you to feed me Buster: I know Rio: and really could've put the worktop to more use Buster: & the table, barely used that Rio: Well now I'm gonna be thinking about you tomorrow morning when I'm getting breakfast too Buster: You're welcome Rio: It's not fair Buster: I told you, I don't play fair Buster: Just hard Rio: I'll just have to make sure you're thinking about me too Buster: How will you ever compete with my family's riveting breakfast conversation though? Buster: We're all so chatty, like Rio: Didn't know if you were on the first flight out in disgrace Rio: got your own plans then, like Buster: I don't reckon we sit down for breakfast at the same time as your lot Buster: Somehow Rio: how else you gonna fit in brunch and high tea Buster: 😂 Rio: you reckon imma get up for you Buster: Yeah Buster: Even if you also stayed up all night for me Rio: You're so fucking Rio: cocky Buster: Is that meant to insult me? Confident in a bold way, yeah, I am Buster: 'Cause I can be Rio: No Rio: just facts Rio: I've not said how I feel about it Buster: You don't need to Buster: You're so obvious Rio: So? Rio: You think you ain't Rio: I wanna be Buster: It's not a bad thing either Buster: I ain't saying it is Rio: You've said it is before Buster: So? Buster: We're both said worse before Rio: Yeah but did you mean that or do you mean this Buster: You really need to ask? Rio: Yeah Rio: this don't need to be a headfuck does it Rio: that's the whole point Buster: Making it known what you want is only bullshit if you then don't go after it Buster: Be as obvious as you want if that ain't all you do Rio: or when I go after one of your mates, obviously Buster: Shut up Rio: What Buster: Not a headfuck you just said Rio: It ain't Buster: Don't Buster: That's not what I wanna be thinking about Rio: Me either Buster: Then stop Rio: Alright Rio: I'm not thinking about it Buster: Good Rio: do you really have to go tomorrow Rio: can't you just behave Buster: It don't matter if I do, what's done is already done Rio: I know Rio: 😒 Buster: They gotta lay the law down while they still can, time's running out for it Rio: Know the feeling Rio: you made a mess Rio: guess who's gotta clean it up Rio: washing up is definitely what I wanna be doing rn Buster: I know you'd rather I made more mess & cleaned it up but that'll have to wait Buster: You can shower without me later though, I won't be that mad about it Rio: 😩 ugh Rio: please come back, won't complain about the washing up once if you just Buster: Come here Buster: It's your turn Rio: have you gone back to the pub Buster: The flat yeah Rio: I can't just show up at the party again can I Buster: Why not? Rio: 'cos they'll be expecting me to stay not race up to the flat to see you Buster: I'll come down, I didn't get changed, just you Rio: but I wanna sit on your lap again Buster: There's places we can go to do that Rio: Fuck it Rio: alright Buster: Hurry up Rio: there's a bus in 10 minutes so Rio: faster than getting back here Buster: Anything's faster than getting to yours Buster: It's a pisstake Rio: I know, I have to live there Rio: need to drive asap Buster: I reckon you could, if you work out a way to reach the pedals, like Rio: Piss off 😂 Rio: just 'cos I'm not gonna look like I'm in a clown car don't be salty Buster: I ain't getting a smart car, I'll be fine Rio: Neither am I Rio: but sadly you'd be waiting 2 years over the 20 this'll take so deal and have a drink waiting for me yeah Buster: You can have a tall glass of brandy if you don't behave Rio: 🤢 stop Rio: you just want an excuse to not go near me Rio: I see you Buster: I wanna be near you Rio: Yeah but how near Buster: You'll see Rio: if there's brandy I know you don't wanna go that far Buster: Do you? Rio: You know I wanna go all the way Rio: or what's the point starting Buster: The point is not being able to stop Buster: You think we'll just do this once? Rio: How are we gonna know if we don't try Rio: why not, because we're not meant to? Buster: I already know I'm that good Rio: then find out how good I am Rio: I'm not going to fall in love with you like calm down, it's fine Buster: You already did Buster: Glad you're finally over it now, babe Rio: 🙄 Boy please Rio: I was not Rio: we were kids you aren't even capable Buster: Tell it to my parents Rio: If I get drunk enough, I might Rio: though they're already pissed at you, might actually murder me Buster: You're not here to get drunk Rio: You're hot when you're serious Buster: I'm always hot Rio: 😏 Buster: You never told me that thing, you know, you just let me in Rio: Oh Rio: I forgot Rio: who knows why Buster: So come on, I'm waiting Buster: Tell me Rio: Something you don't know? Buster: Yeah Rio: Trouble is, I think you know as much as you wanna know Rio: you're not trying to know any more than that Buster: Bullshit, when have I wanted less than everything since you've known me Rio: You gonna give me everything in return? Buster: You can have it all, you just have to want it Rio: What's wrong with us Rio: do you reckon Buster: Depends who you ask Buster: If you're asking me, nothing Buster: You're flawless & I obviously am Rio: It's not our fault we're hot Rio: I bet loads of people think it but just don't do anything about it, right Rio: they just lie to save face, don't wanna put it out there to have it shot down Buster: Exactly Rio: Yeah Rio: we just ain't afraid to take what we want Buster: My parents didn't give a fuck & neither do I Buster: They have their uses Rio: really good excuse if we got caught Rio: but we won't, obviously Buster: Not that I've thought about it loads or anything Buster: Obviously Rio: Yeah right Rio: start thinking then boy you've got a lot of catching up to do Buster: Keep up with my sarcasm, babe Rio: I am, babe Rio: but I can't be thinking about you thinking about me right now Rio: this bus is kinda packed Buster: What happened to not afraid? Rio: I'm not afraid, that's the issue, I'm too turned on to be not with you right now Buster: It's not an issue & there's no such thing as too turned on, not when you're on your way to see me Rio: sadly the rest of the fam is gonna be there too but that's life Buster: Nah, I'm getting you alone as soon as you get here Buster: They don't need to even know you are Rio: let's try Rio: I am hard to miss Buster: Yeah but I'm at the bus stop Buster: None of them are Rio: Really Buster: Why would I wait for you in there instead of here? Rio: Always thinking Rio: I can't right now, your fault Buster: But you are, about me Rio: yes Rio: a lot Buster: I'm thinking about you too Rio: Good Rio: I want to do exactly what you're thinking about so make it good Buster: It's always good Rio: It better be Rio: still gonna top it Buster: You better Rio: bet on it Buster: High stakes, babe Buster: Good thing you ain't afraid Rio: What other stakes are there? Rio: no guts no glory Buster: You could be bluffing Rio: You want proof? Rio: That is risky Buster: I like risk Buster: Don't you? Rio: [as sexy a selfie you're gonna manage on a bus lbr it's mostly about the 'fit and facial expression here] Buster: Good answer Rio: Thanks 😏 Buster: [As sexy a selfie as you can manage alone at a bus stop, which is very when you don't give a fuck anyway] Buster: You're welcome Rio: JESUS Buster: Like I said, heaven's as easy as hell Rio: is it Rio: I feel like I'll never get there now but I don't even care Rio: fuck Buster: I'll get you there Rio: Please Buster: It's been ages since you tried politeness on me, I thought you'd given up Rio: I said, I wanna do whatever you want Rio: politeness included Buster: Don't worry, I'll tell you what to do Rio: How did you know Buster: Like I said, being obvious ain't a bad thing Rio: Why don't most other lads get it then Buster: They don't care what you want Rio: Hmm Rio: probably true Buster: They want what they want, that's it Rio: but if that's me they should do it right Buster: They probably think they are Buster: Or they don't care as long as it's right for them Rio: 😒 schoolboys, I'm telling you Buster: Excuse you Rio: be the exception Rio: giving you a chance to show me otherwise Buster: I am Buster: You think you're the first girl to issue that to me Rio: 🙄 alright Buster: Your eyes will be rolling back in your head by the time we're done, yeah Rio: believe it when it happens Rio: happy to be proven wrong Buster: Happy ain't the word Rio: Have you thought of the word yet? Buster: I'm thinking you might as well go back to begging 'cause that's what's gonna be coming most naturally to you, like Buster: Please is as good a word as any for you right now Rio: Buster Buster: Rio Rio: You cannot say my name after saying all that I'm Buster: I could say sorry but I'm not Rio: don't say sorry Rio: not for this Rio: ever, alright Buster: I won't Buster: But you're gonna need to if you keep making me wait Rio: Trust, I've never been more sorry Rio: I hate the fucking bus Buster: How far away are you? Rio: 3 stops Rio: not that I'm counting Buster: Jesus Rio: I know Rio: why do you think I'm so fucking desperate Buster: I know why, but tell me how desperate you are since we've got so much time to kill Rio: I just keep looking at your picture Rio: It's really hard to keep my hands to myself Buster: [sends her an even better one cos just that bitch] Rio: You're only going to touch me once and I'm going to explode Buster: Yeah but then I get to do it all again Rio: How many times can we fit in before you go Buster: How much stamina do you have? Rio: Buster, I want you for as long as you're here Rio: fuck that, I want you longer but I need that Buster: Fuck Buster: Okay Rio: It's been too long Buster: Yeah Rio: I've wanted this for so long Rio: you know Buster: Me too Rio: I know Rio: we just need to cross the line Buster: We need to fucking erase it Buster: No going back Rio: I want that too Buster: I need that Rio: There's so much I wanna tell you Rio: show you Buster: Do it Rio: Maybe I'm a bit scared Rio: about that Buster: Don't be Rio: Do my best Buster: Seriously, you can trust me Rio: Yeah Rio: more worried about myself Rio: but I can see you, finally Rio: [so maybe a kiss is unavoidable but one of the kids should come out 'cos they're young enough to be highkey and annoying maybe pablo or janis 'cos they'd like buster and if one of the adults is like oh he's outside somewhere] Buster: Yeah? How do I look? Rio: Better than you did earlier, and your pictures Rio: somehow Buster: You can have some credit Rio: [getting off the bus like 😏 'say that again'] Buster: [does obvs oh the eye contact oh the tension] Rio: [not gonna be able to leave it long 'fore initiating this like been building forever so enjoy the view bus people] Buster: [literally tho] Rio: [don't enjoy the view hopefully janis eek] Buster: [when there's nothing chaste about this kiss so good luck styling that out if she does] Rio: [ahh the trust issues begin, 'cos Rio is this fam's star child still lmao okay] Buster: [this fam makes me die] Rio: [when you've got to come back in the party now you can't just bolt like] Rio: fuck Buster: Go Rio: I can't Buster: You fucking have to Rio: I will as soon as I can Rio: how is she being Rio: does she seem normal Buster: I don't know Rio: Jesus Buster: What do you want me to do? Rio: Just be your normal self Buster: Who the fuck is that? Buster: Christ Rio: Yeah, like that Rio: I don't know Rio: she couldn't have seen Rio: she would be Buster: You don't know that Rio: No I don't but Rio: can't ask her, can we Rio: we have to run with best possible outcome or we could fuck it needlessly Buster: You have to say something Rio: What can I say? Rio: how do I explain that away Buster: It's about what she can say Rio: she's only 8 Rio: they'll probably think she's making it up or that it was just like a goodbye kiss or Rio: something Buster: Fuck that Rio: She won't say anything Rio: I'll make sure if I have to Buster: Make sure then Rio: Not unless I have to Buster: You do have to Rio: just stop Rio: I need to go Rio: think or puke or both Buster: You need to prioritise Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: Don't have a go at me when you're not offering or are going to do ANYTHING about it alright Buster: What the hell can I do? I barely know her Rio: what can I do Rio: no one's so close to their younger siblings they can just chat about shit like this Rio: it's not a normal situation Buster: Threaten, bribe, whatever the fuck Rio: I'm thinking Rio: that was so stupid we're so fucking stupid Buster: I'll do it if you won't Rio: I'll do it Rio: like you said, you don't know her Buster: Don't wait too long Rio: I'm not going to Rio: trust me, she is not that kid Rio: she wouldn't just drop it now Rio: I'll work out what she saw Rio: then what she wants Buster: I'm gonna have to trust you, aren't I Buster: Not like I have a load of other options Rio: we don't have any Rio: that's what it is Buster: Shut up & delete everything Buster: It's her word against ours if it needs to be Rio: Right Rio: she can't use this, even if she wanted Rio: if she even kept going, I'll say I'm blackout, or you, everyone saw us both drinking Buster: Everyone saw me in your kitchen too Rio: not everyone Rio: she wasn't there, I'm 100% she stayed Rio: they were just bringing back the two little ones and then mum was going back Buster: I can't fucking remember Rio: I can Rio: I know who was there Rio: I had to talk to them after you bolted Rio: I know she wasn't Buster: Alright Buster: & Nance can back up how it was when we last saw each other Rio: Yeah Rio: as far as everyone knows we still just tolerate each other at functions Rio: if my parents want a reason why you came over, we can think of one, easy Buster: Yeah Buster: & I'm going home in the morning Rio: Right Rio: out of sight out of mind Buster: School starts soon, I won't be dragged back for months Buster: I can do loads more bad shit than this in that time Buster: Deflect Rio: you already have today Rio: everyone would think it was a joke Buster: Exactly Buster: I can pull hot older women, why would I bother with you Rio: Okay Buster: Okay then Rio: Don't delete everything Rio: that will look weird Rio: tolerate each other or not there can't be nothing Buster: I'll keep you saying you hate me Rio: Bit intense Buster: Still believable Buster: Ask Nance Rio: I ain't her Buster: I can be as mean to you as I am to her Buster: Easy Rio: Again, too much Rio: this is how we got here Rio: ambivalence Buster: Calm down Buster: I can do that too Buster: As easily Rio: Sure Buster: Worry about yourself Rio: I am, don't worry Buster: I ain't, you've got more to lose than me Buster: You'll keep it together Rio: No one's losing anything Buster: Just Janis & her innocence Rio: Don't joke Rio: omg Buster: I'm not Rio: Then shut up Buster: Fine Buster: We're done anyway Rio: just delete the messages after Rio: don't lie Buster: I'm not lying either Buster: What else is there to say? Rio: Seriously Buster: Seriously Rio: Fine Buster: Don't lie Rio: What else is there for me to say? Buster: You tell me Buster: There's clearly something else you wanna Rio: I told you, there was loads I wanted to say Rio: and you said I could trust you Rio: shit's gotta change but now you ain't saying nothing and you don't trust me Buster: You also said we wouldn't get caught Buster: Shit has changed Rio: And you don't even know if we did Buster: Don't be stupid Rio: Fine then Buster: Get a grip, Cavante Buster: For your own sake Rio: Fuck off Rio: you're freaking out here Buster: Fuck you Buster: It was a kiss, we've been there before Rio: Exactly Rio: you want me to make it into this whole huge thing Buster: I want you to stop being a pussy & handle it Rio: Worry 'bout yourself Rio: if you're so concerned, you do something about it Buster: Alright, I will Rio: Cool Buster: [when you bribe Janis with boxing related shit like lessons or something idk] Rio: [hitting the drink] Buster: Don't Rio: I'm not an idiot, Buster Rio: I'm not gonna get wasted and spill all Buster: Says you Buster: Using my name's too intimate for what we're supposed to be, don't you reckon Rio: What else would you like me to call you Buster: Use your imagination Rio: I have Buster: Good Rio: Are you done lecturing me Buster: [does a cheers at her with his drink] Rio: [does it back and downs it] Buster: [downs his too] Rio: [just on your phone hitting up new options 'cos gotta go] Buster: [likewise sexting some girl cos need the distraction but if you bring her to the flat your mum will actually kill you] Rio: [when the other kids keep trying to hit you up and you're like nah] Buster: [getting them nudes you don't really want] Rio: [when you hear that boy racer pulling up before she's even out, when your mum is like umm but you gone] Buster: [when you have to pretend you don't notice/care]