#Crack Theory: Please Don't Take This Too Seriously

[sirenjose]

Theory: Lily's Maid = Martha = Alice's Colleague?

(Crack theory, not really serious. Just a silly thought)

What if the lady helping Lily (maid?) against Lily’s alcoholic father is Martha (Coordinator)?

Or even, what if: Lily’s maid = Alice’s Colleague = Martha?

Originally, I wrote this theory out as what if Lily’s mom could be Martha, but I had a few other ideas part way through that made me switch to wondering about the other lady we see in Lily’s trailer.

Martha’s mother wanted her to be the “perfect wife”, a “house angel”, lady-like

Everyone in Lily’s household looks well off and nice enough clothing. Considering how well off this family is, and the tasks she had, it’d fit with Martha having “beautiful script” in the past based on her 2nd letter.

And if she is a “maid”, she is helping take care of their house (manor) and having to act lady-like (and respectful and such).

Martha says in her 3rd deduction that she had to “organize, appoint, teach the maids and arrange all financial expenses wisely” + Margaretha Hari’s profession was stated to be a “teacher”.

Lily’s family did have maids (that could be “organize[d], appoint[ed], and [taught]”.

We know Lily’s father was “unappreciated and unloved”, but he did have enough wealth to give Lily a “carefree childhood”, just not as much wealth and some others, so having to be “wise” with it to an extent makes sense (Lily was said to have been “pampered” by her family, so he was just more free with it for her, before the accident).

He’d have to use some of his wealth to start his “Barriere Family Sports Show”. And we know he had financial issues after Simon’s accident.

Martha had good horsemanship skills + joined the cavalry

Lily’s father started his “Barriere Family Sports Show” at the Kreiburg Racecourse, with Simon being a jockey. Not to mention Lily’s parents and Simon were said to be passionate about sports, most notably horse racing.

Theory: Maybe Martha wished she could’ve been a jockey too but wasn’t allowed to due to the expectations placed on her.

Henry was Martha’s fiancé, but her primary interest in him was because he was a pilot

Based on Martha’s appearance and stated age (whether or not its completely true is unknown), as well as Henry only being Martha’s “fiancé”, it doesn’t fit as well if Martha was Lily’s mom and married with 2 kids. But a maid, in comparison, could fit.

Theory: Maybe to parallel Martha’s 7th deduction (Martha liked Henry mainly because he was a pilot), Martha was in love with Simon (or at least pretended to be) due to him being a jockey (and this was her way of getting closer to what she actually wanted to be). Maybe he at least talked to her about it (being a jockey).

Theory: if Martha did care about Simon at all (or at least as part of her act), maybe that’s why she’d stay and help Lily when her father becomes violent and alcoholic? As we know Lily frequently visits Simon to cheer him up.

Martha still unable to become an actual pilot

Theory: Martha still not an actual jockey

Theory: What if Martha did somehow get a job helping at the racecourse? At least the day the Barriere Family Sports Show opened? It just wasn’t as a jockey. If Lily’s father organized it, it’s possible Martha could ask him to have some part in it, just not the job she wants.

Theory: Martha’s 10th deduction mentions a “worker with their head in the clouds”. Maybe if she did get a job, but not the one she wanted, she did have her “head in the clouds” that day. And maybe somehow because of that, either the accident was able to happen, or she was unable to help Simon?

Henry gets into an accident

Simon’s accident during the sports show

Theory: Henry is never explicitly stated to have died due to his accident. Simon didn’t die due to his either, he was just very seriously injured.

Martha wants to end a particular “business” and guarantee her own safety. She is also aware of the DeRoss family tragedy at Oletus Manor and mentions not wanting to “trouble that gentleman”

Theory: Maybe the business she wants to “end”/leave is her working for the Barriere family, especially after Lily’s father becomes an alcoholic and dies, with Lily and Simon dealing with financial issues. Maybe that “gentleman” is either Lily’s father or Lily’s grandfather aka Count Barriere. Count Barriere and Dennis DeRoss apparently knew each other to some degree, so that could be how Martha might be aware of the DeRoss tragedy.

She’d also know Baron DeRoss due to Lily’s Lending Certificate, as Lily is now who Baron DeRoss owes money to (due to debt from purchasing Oletus Manor most likely).

Maybe for some reason Martha needs to get away from Count Barriere (maybe she found something out or did something?). Considering how powerful Count Barriere is implied to be, that could explain why she needs a whole new identity and her safety guaranteed.

Maybe she’s talking to Baron DeRoss pretending to want to get away when actually she wants to help Lily ensure she gets Baron DeRoss to pay his debt?

Misc

Martha’s 4th Letter?

In this letter, Martha appears to be a “Captain” (if Michiko’s 4th letter, she’s referenced as an “Officer”), on a mission, and potentially tied to intelligence gathering (and spying, based on the morse code, fake names, various train tickets, the bit with the tobacco being poured out purposefully to replace with a chemical smell). As a “maid” (compared to having to marry to Lily’s father, which would require much more time and much less freedom), she easily could’ve gotten the job with a fake name and everything, potentially for the purpose of her intelligence gathering or whatever her mission is, which maybe could be why she needed to get close to people like Lily and her family (including Simon and/or Lily’s father).

“Or is she just like that alcoholic of a woman?”

Lily’s father was an alcoholic. Maybe he drank dovlin, so maybe Martha could’ve met or at least learned about Demi that way (and maybe this could be why she refers to Demi that way? After her experience with Lily’s father?)

Server (Maid Martha) vs Maid Martha…?

End Note: It could be that Alice’s colleague is someone else, that the maid in Lily’s trailer is no one important, or even that Lily’s mom could be the colleague and just that the colleague isn’t also Martha. I’m also aware that Martha’s deduction could all be entirely fake/lies. As I said, this is just a silly thought that I’m unsure could be true at all but felt like sharing anyways just for fun.

#idv #identity v #martha behamfil #lily barriere #coordinator #cheerleader #idv martha #identity v martha #idv lily #identity v lily #idv coordinator #identity v coordinator #idv cheerleader #identity v cheerleader #Alice's colleague #Lily's mother #Maid Martha? #Crack Theory: Please Don't Take This Too Seriously #Mostly Just For Fun #sirenjose analyses and theories

[anqelbean]

One crack theory I have is that the reason Gongyi Xiao and Zhuzhi-Lang had to die is because they paralleled Luo Binghe too much and There Could Only Be One.

Shen Qingqiu even points out that the reason that Liu Qingge was booted from appearing in PIDW is because he was a similar character type to Binghe and they would have to like, compete for dominance, to which Liu Qingge wouldn't have stood a chance.

Now imagine what happens to when you have not one but TWO other pretty boys who directly parallel Luo Binghe (Zhuzhi-Lang being raised by Binghe's father while Gongyi Xiao being Head Disciple of Binghe's mother's sect, a position which she also had).

It becomes clearer when Luo Bingge enters SVSSS and our Binghe is immediately sent to PIDW. Then when our Binghe returns, Luo Bingge is curb-stomped back to PIDW.

There Can Only Be One.

#this is a crack theory so please don't take it too seriously! #anqels ramblings #eva.txt #svsss #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #gongyi xiao #zhuzhi lang #liu qingge #scum villain self saving system #svsss theory

[madefordvarka]

Hear me out: She and her sister are a combination of the OG Stel and Geno’s DNA. (Canonically they were created in a lab, her lip and face shape looks like Stel’s, her nose kinda looks like a combination of Geno+Stel’s...) 

#This is my crack theory LMFAO #I've been saying this for a long time but then I noticed that she does look a little like Stel... #personal #LIKE I WAS LITERALLY JOKING BUT... #Also don't take this too seriously please lolol

[deadloverscity]

varadeva aus that makes me lose sleep : (pt.1)

drunk!deva ! I have a wip but it's too small and I genuinely would love to read different takes on drunk!deva, like genuinely what does he do

Marriage fics because it just fits them well. There are so many layers, like it could be for political reasons. The popular theory that both of them were the least liked kids from their respective tribes so they're hitched because wohoo it will reduce conflict. Or, it would be a choice either way ahead in the story because it was a way to save Deva and his mother's life, or at the later part after the ceasefire to convince shouryangas not to start a rebellion. There is just SOO many possibilities, personally them getting married before the whole fiasco is amazing because no one knows what kind of maniac deva is lol. like the least favourite kid gets the least favourable marriage alliance but jokes on everyone the potential spouse in question has a fatal flaw of loyalty and would move dynasties for whom they love. I am also a tgcf enthusiast so you can see where I am going. oh my god if anyone wants to build on any of this PLEASE LET'S BRAINSTORM

I really wanna see them as enemies to lovers but someone will have to open my eyes for that. They're too sweet to me to even think they'd start off on the wrong foot

A CRACK MATCHMAKING AU brought to you by Varadha's loyalists! just comedy because I think khansaar needs comedy sometimes like miserable planning to get varadeva together or maybe they are alr together and others just don't know it yet lol

soulmate fics!! I am sucker for them, so here me out literally any type of soulmate settings, the black/white vision to colour (insane given neel's colour grading) or red string of fate. And, of course my personal favourite where it is either only the shouryangas or the mannars who believe in it (like a folklore/tradition), not taken seriously but so much room for angst. r 18 so pls skip if you're minor or uncomfy:

smut which includes a very specific throne in Khansaar

OBESSION !! OBSESSION !! just works so well with them + filthy conversations.

service top deva

#salaar #varadha #varadeva #who wants to write together word sprint time #deva #i love them so much #tgcf #projecting tgcf onto everything atp

[satins-shithole]

To understand an idiot

ight guys, first time posting a fic so please be gentle. this is just the preview, a lil snippet of what's to come. this is going to be a multi part story so let me know if anyone wants tagging in for future chapters. Its basically a fix-it-fic to the cannon events with some other twists along the way. so we going back to 2012 avengers BABY! anyways enjoy <3 ALSO not proof read bc we die like real men. should really put some warnings in this too, swearing for sure. that should be a given for all smut for later chapters, but no other warnings for now.

Words: 1082

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Well… that sure as shit didn't go to plan. It was supposed to be different. She wasn’t supposed to be anywhere fucking near here, not even in the same universe. So why. Why was she here?

Fuck. She still looks like the fresh air that tickles the side of your lungs when you take a deep breath. Or the reason why people want to start learning golf. (Because seriously all the sports in the world and mortals choose to play golf?). Truly one of life's mysteries. Just like her. An enigma, a true Pandora’s box advocate. The impenetrability of her walls is unmatched, unfazed, and unpredictable. The soft moments hidden behind mugs of caffeinated liquid and inside quip’s showing that the walls can in fact be cracked. She won't let them break, but they can crack. Other times the quick exchanges with others within proximity are harsh reminders that you don't know her. You'll never know her. Everything you think you know, is it really her?. But she is there. She’s always there, exactly when she needs to be. As all mortals are, staying in one place all at one time. Never really going far. Hell, these goons aren't even off their own planet yet. A mere particle on the never ending shit-stain that is the greatness of creation. HALLELUJAH. Wait. Where is she now? Maybe she'll know  where the best place to eat is?. Doubtful, you did just appear out of thin air, in the middle of what looks like a heated debate. Who was she again? Where have you seen this woman before? Oofft this was starting to bother you now. 

That's it. Never ever again are we to travel via staff. It's always the same outcome so why did you let him do it? Questions upon Questions. Most of them have started to fall back down to the place they emerged up from. 

Shaking your head, trying to collect your thoughts. This was too much, you're far too tired for this. Quick in and out, go get some birria tacos and be back before the next episode is on. Sounds simple in theory. So why were you upside down, in a dark room full of pipes and machines? Why was there that repetitive shriek happening? 

The two who fell with you are starting to stir. That was some surprise, even for you. Whose life is one endless surprise. Out of all of the “pops” you've had, that one feels like definitely  was planned. Or like some sort of sick joke. What were you just thinking? Where's that woman gone? And why were you thinking all of these things about her? Where the fuck has Primo sent you?!

A touch to your shoulder had pulled you from the countless thoughts that swarmed your head. It was her, the culprit herself. The very one who had scattered your thoughts like they were sheep seeing a wolf.

“Hey are you okay”

Her voice was strained from the position she was in. It looks like her foot was stuck on something. Some large debris that had fallen down with you was on top of her foot.

“Hey, can you hear me? Are you okay?”

Shit. here we go again. The whole no talking thing. Time to talk with your hands. She's gonna know what a thumbs up is right?. I'd be worried if not. Let's go with that. Throwing up your left hand, thumb drawn high she seemed to get the message.

Stunned silence overtook the two of you, until it was broken by the second person you'd fallen down with. The man started to groan, and squirm in what could be assumed as pain.

“Bruce?”

The woman spoke again. By the tone of her voice you knew she was scared.

“Bruce, you're okay. Everything's gonna be fine.”

‘Bruce’ was now getting louder, and a lot more mobile. That was it, you sat upright and instantly felt cold. A tell tale sign that you're nearly at your limit. You needed to go home, rest and come back to this another day. It would be easier to put *a pin in this situation and come back when you've not just left the tournament of all tournaments. A true testament of what it means to be a pre-eminent being. But even they cannot fight forever. Everything has a limit, and you're going to hit yours soon.

The groans and whines from ‘bruce’ were louder now, as he was beginning to sit up. Another groan,but not from him. It was from her. She was still looking down at he- SHIT.

Her foot was still stuck and you'd been sitting there looking like a deer in headlights because of what? Her? No way. You're tired, you've just been through a lot in the past 72 hours. Was it even 72 hours? You're tired. 

After what felt like forever you moved. Fuck it hurts to move, The bending down really reminded you of that. But you needed to get that pipe off her and figure out what the hell is wrong with him? With a deep breath you managed to heave the solid chunk of metal from on top of her foot. Pulling her upright in one swift motion, not one she bothered to acknowledge. Her concentration was solely on the man rolling around in front of you two.

“Bruce I swear we will get out of this, I swear on my lif-”

“YOUR LIFE?!”

That was enough for you, well enough for you to figure out something isn't right with this guy. Was he turning green? 

A grasp at your wrist tore your eyes off the scene that was happening before you, a lot has just happened in the space of two minutes. You need a breather. Or a strong drink, the decisions still up in the air. But where had all the questions gone? You had lots before, didn’t you?. What was it you were sent here for aga-

“We need to move!”

Holy shit. For the first time since your sudden appearance in this shit-hole you’ve only just looked around at the mortals that surrounded you. Well one of them. The others were still up in the room with the big window. And the other one ‘Bruce’ was it? He was definitely turning green now. But the only one who actually acknowledged you. The one holding onto your wrist, staring at you with such intensity, such fire, such passi-

“Are you dumb?!, we need to move NOW!”

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #marvel #black widow #natasha romanoff #natasha x you #natasha romanov #natalia romanova #the avengers #black widow x reader #black widow x y/n

[haleigh-sloth]

Bakugo/2nd User/Shigaraki

*cracks knuckles*

Alright, I don't need too much more detail for the point I'm making here, not really. So I'm just gonna put this out there now with the information from 362 we have. And I'm not even going to entertain the notion that Bakugo is actually dead. Please understand..lol. I don't have the energy for that.

What I DO have the energy for is relating all of this to past, present, and future circumstances, and of course to Shigaraki. Because yes, it is necessary.

I talk a lot about Shigaraki and Midoriya and their ties together, the things that bring them together and all that. And I have about Bakugo as well, just not very in depth. But this chapter brings ALL of that back into the light.

And I HAVE said it before--Bakugo is basically a dress rehearsal version of Shigaraki for Izuku. Bakugo and Shigaraki are paralleled, to an extent. Izuku is only a small point in this post though, like the ribbon tied into a bow at the end to bring it all together. Because this is not a linear, clear cut relationship among these 4 characters (2nd, Bakugo, Deku, Shig).

Just for a brief moment, I'm gonna take it back a bit and point out where Bakugo and Shigaraki started walking along the same sort of path, that path that inevitably will lead being saved by the same person, and in Bakugo's case, already having been saved:

Bakugo was having his body hijacked, taken over, possessed, etc. Bottom line, Bakugo was going to disappear. Sound familiar?

The Shigaraki versions are clearly callbacks to chapter 1. CLEARLY they are.

The next key moments that relate the three living characters in this little quadruplet together:

Understanding. I've been screaming it for a long time. Lack of understanding has been one of the underlying issues among these three. The word "understanding" has been used way too many times with them for it to not matter, and it was even brought up as recently as....oh idk, three chapters ago, in this same fight:

So, understanding is important.

Izuku is wanting and working to give it, Bakugo thinks he's already achieved it, and Shigaraki is still seeking it.

Now, I'm about the bring the second user into the equation, but first I want to draw attention to what happened this chapter and in chapter 270:

Here is where I'll just say that....having a stopped heart means nothing. Lol. Shigaraki's heart stopped during the war. It was noted that he was basically dead, but we know that it was just near death.

What happened during that near death experience was Shigaraki facing the regrets from his past:

And Shigaraki's regrets and issues lie with his family. That's why he manifested them in his head.

Bakugo on the other hand:

We know his regrets lie with someone else, and also with himself. But he's looking at them as he's nearing death.

But Shigaraki rejected his regrets, and rejected death, while Bakugo seems to have accepted his regrets, and accepted what’s to come:

Now, idk how, but he'll be fine. Seriously. Dead. Fucking. Serious.

These are a series of details that point out parallels and cross points in his and Shigaraki's arcs that are inevitably going to end at one end point, with Midoriya's arc as well.

No I'm bringing in the 2nd user. Here is where I'm really not sure. I haven't theorized on the relation to Bakugo other than Bakugo fulfilling the role he played. I doubt they're blood related, and a Hard No to the time travel theory. But clearly the resemblance is intentional. And we're finally beginning to get follow up on it.

Here's where it gets all cluttered and not entirely clear who relates to who, or how:

Midoriya & Shigaraki---> hero & villain; foils, parallels, narrative shadows of each other bound to integrate

Midoriya & Yoichi---> representatives of OFA and the idea of saving in the OFA/AFO plotline

Yoichi & Shigaraki---> parallels (kinda); Shigaraki is Yoichi 2.0, needed saving from AFO

Bakugo & Shigaraki---> parallels; saved (or will be saved) by Midroyia

Midoriya & 2nd User---> the one choosing to reach out to the person needing saving from AFO

Bakugo & 2nd user---> lookalikes, 2nd in line within a plotline (2nd user/2nd hero)

Sigh, do you see how it's all fucking messy and all over the place. Anyway--it all ties together in a nice little bow :)

OFA (Izuku) and a 2nd Person (Bakugo) will save someone from AFO (Shigaraki).

BUT--keep in mind what the 2nd user had in mind at first. He went in guns a blazin'. Sound familiar?

But 2nd stopped in his tracks and immediately changed his approach. Because unlike the current situation with Bakugo and Shigaraki, the 2nd user immediately saw someone who needed help. It was obvious with Yoichi. With Shigaraki, I mean even the vestiges themselves were debating whether he “looked the part” as someone who needed saving. So it’s completely believable that Bakugo has still yet to have that view of Shigaraki. He doesn’t know, how could he?

Now this is based on the belief that Bakugo is in no type of saving mindset right now. I personally am not convinced that he has had that talk, had that conversation, or idea put into his head by Midoriya. I just...I don't see it. And this isn't the time for him to reach out anyway. So imo, it would make most sense for that to be the case right now. (we'll see though).

But the bottom line is---Bakugo will be a hero who reaches out a hand.

FYI---I'm not gonna theorize about the vestige business because we just don't know yet. It seems Bakugo is seeing vestige AM which will require some in-manga explanation that makes sense (canon or not, movie doesn't cut it). But I'm just gonna leave it at--he's tied to all this shit lmao.

Now look, there are some components to this Shigaraki business that he can't do. He can't handle the Shimura Family turmoil and help Shigaraki clear all of that guilt and self hatred, that's on Izuku to tackle. But seeing as how Bakugo and Midoriya are two separate people tied to the "understanding" issue with Shigaraki, are two people whose validation/opinions/insight/whatever you wanna call it Shigaraki sought out at one point--it makes perfect sense for them both to show that they're opening their hearts up to understanding someone they both previously rejected, because it's time to try something new.

Where along in the process Bakugo will contribute, I'm not sure. I have my own personal ideas as to how that can go, but my main guess is he'll reach out his hand, and lift him up onto his feet after Shigaraki's fought off his inner turmoil (through Izuku's efforts) enough to reclaim his body and be himself again. Be that backup reassurance that, "Yeah, people are here for you, finally." Specifically two people Shigaraki looked to for different reasons, no less. And, for my own personal hope and prediction, start working with Bakugo and Izuku to finish the war together.

#bnha #bnha spoilers #bnha 362 #bakugo katsuki #shigaraki tomura #midoriya izuku #deku #dynamight #i have no idea if any of this tied together smoothly but it's there #take it #do with it what you will #boku no hero academia #bnha meta #shimura tenko

[idkyourleastfavoriteartist]

SPOILERS FOR THE MOST IF NOT THE WHOLE SHOW OF THE DRAGON PRINCE (mostly season 5) THIS IS NOT A SERIOUS THEORY (crack theory) BUT SOME THING I JUST THOUGHT OF SO PLEASE DON'T TAKE TOO SERIOUSLY!!!!! (if you want to know more i could speak about it more)

You know the theory that aaravos is actually talking about sir sparklepuff (the being) not viren at the end of season 5 and how alot of people think that sir sparklepuff magic is fading but instead what if sir sparklepuff magic is increasing so their insect / butterfly look could fade away and they could be more elf / human looking though time (the spell that aaravos and viren did) and this can make some sense because when aaravos is talking about sir sparklepuffs mortal existence fading (if we're assuming that aaravos was not taking about viren but sir sparklepuff ) then instead of them dying what if he's talking about sparklepuff becoming immortal because of their star touch elf blood/dna and it would explain the reason why aaravos calls them his child because if sir sparklepuff was just some spell that would go away naturally threw time then aaravos wouldn't have called them his child because its a collective agreement that aaravos doesn't care about life itself but he does care alot about love and loyalty so its so weird that him of all people would humanise sir sparklepuff and aaravos 100% knows that him humanising sir sparklepuff calling them there child to viren would not work out for him in the end if he really wanted viren to do the spell he would just tell him and he would have 100% done it but due to aaravos never lying that could be why he calls them that and him wanting viren to kill sir sparklepuff could be a test because after him using dark magic for the first time (in a long time) he had nightmares and he realised that he's going down a dark path and that hes done with everything (including aaravos) so that means he could have no one else to control so basically he baby trapping him not to mention they are already growing and having a more human / elf looking form when compared to their caterpillar form from season 3 so i feel like the more they grow the more from the dark magic (which has both viren and araavos blood / dna) leading to a less bug looking sir sparklepuff (please give them a proper name in season 6) and i believe that sir sparklepuff talking also something that could support this because its shows them being able to have their own personality and being more than a spell.

Extra notes:

ALSO THIS IS JUST A THOUGHT I DOUBT IM RIGHT ABOUT ANYTHING LOL.

Tbh the only reason why this came up in my head is because aaravos says the truth but in the most weirdest ways possible.

I did a different way of colouring and i actually like this new way of doing it but its still not perfect though.

Any way due to this thought in my head i decided to draw a more elf/human hybrid (even though they are technically are already that) for sir sparklepuff for when they are older (also even though everyone calls sir sparklepuff a boy but i think a non binary sir sparklepuff is amazing and is one if not my favorite head canon)

Also sorry if i got any info wrong or any gramma wrong i just started typing this out because it was in my head for a bit i just find this a interesting idea.

If you have anything to add on or say PLEASE do.

#the dragon prince #viravos #sir sparklepuff #the being #digital art #crack theory #tdp spoilers #tdp season 5 #tdp #the dragon prince spoilers #aaravos #viren #lord viren

[lizaluvsthis]

MY BOUNDARIES:

Allowed-

- you're only allowed to call me Liza/Liz

- to ask me specific questions or anykind of stuff you want to put

- submit your arts or anykind of gifts you'd like to give me here by mentioning me

- give me an art request ONE at a time- chat stuff about Smg3/Smg4

- G0r3, Angst, Fluff, any drama stuff- just don't come overboard too much-

- If you'd like to DM with me you can! Keep things appropriate please, I'll be likingly to ignore people who're going a bit too far...

- talk out theories, research, lores, analysis from recent smg4 stuffs besides SMG34 too!

- ask permission if you want to repost or download my comics but if you couldn't just give credits ♡ (if not I'm blocking you out.)

NOT Allowed-

- You're not allowed to call me Eliza/El-

- I don't support AI arts or voices and I only use them sometimes for fun.

- I don't ship Smg4 x Mario or even Mario x Meggy so if you're in my blog get out. But if you want to stay- then you could- I don't want to mention much from those two ships

- NSFW, S3xual!zing, Ped0PH1LES, R4C!STS, Mean *ss people, H0MOPH0B3S, R4P3, TR4NSPH0BIA, GR00M3RS, 1NC3STS, PR0SHIPPERS, C0MSH1PPERS, PR0F1C, D34DD0VEDNE, SH0T!/LOL1C0NS, F3TISH

- I dont like people talking about F3T!SH stuff ITS GROSS. GET TF OUT.

- If you keep calling my pronouns HE/HIM or SHE/HER I won't be hesitating on blocking you.

- teasing or bullying here is not fun.

- If you have a problem about smg34 being an 'actual ship' saying "but aren't they brothers?" You're the one to touch some grass and rinse your eyes

- Make jokes about a character getting hurt/trauma physically and Mentally

- Art critisizing (this is MY art and I could change it whenever I want)

- ANTI SMG34 FANS ARE NOT ALLOWED.

- ask me 2 or more art requests I will insist myself if I did gave permission on that- not allowed to steal my HARDWORK/ARTS/FICS or even my artstyle.

- I dont take any of those people who ask me from askbox about Tari x four or something like Meggy x Mario (I know some people here ship them but sorry I cant accept it, please consider my apology in advance. No I'm not starting a war or even hating about it I just dont have the guts for that)

SHIPS- (From Smg4)

CRACK SHIP REAL - Blue

OTP- Red

Maybe? - Orange

Friendzone only - Green

NO. JUST- NO - Purple

I mean I dunno not there yet Ig - Pink

OTP!!!

SMG34

Bowuigi (THIS EXISTS)

Melony x Axol

I'm not there yet but I can see it-

Smg1 x Smg2

Tari x Meggy

Maybe? I dunno-

Niles x Smg0

Tari x Saiko

Meggy x Desti

Chris x Swag

Kaizo x Saiko

Platonic <3<3

Smg1 x bob

Mario x Meggy

Mario x Smg4

Mario x Smg3

NO just NO.

Mario x Smg3 x Smg4 (but if its only for friendship ways then its a friendzone/rather than a ship)

Meggy x Smg3

Tari x Smg4

SHIP ON CRACK- CACKLED

Dasani x Smg4

Death Coffee x Smg3

Mario x PV (please don't take it seriously)

----

CHARACTERS ORIENTATION (HC):

Meggy Spletzer- Demisexual

Tari- Demisexual / QueerPlatonic

Saiko- Asexual

SMG4- Bisexual

SMG3- Pansexual

Mario- AroAce (he loves spaghetti)

Swag- Gay

Chris- Queer

Luigi- Bisexual

Bowser- Demiromantic

Peach- Lesbian

Bob bobowski- Straight Aly

Melony- Straight Aly

Axol- Straight Aly

SMG1- Demisexual

SMG2- Panromantic

Karen- Straight Aly

PuzzleVision- ?¿?¿?

#lizaluv #my introduction page has a restriction that i dont ship mxm

[supernovafeather]

War Buddies

FO!Poe Dameron x M!Reader

Content: MxM, friends to lovers?, bi!Poe, gay!M!reader, only one bed, cuddles for warmth, coming out, sexual mentions, mention of break up, fluff.

Days are getting horrifyingly similar after two weeks spent in this watch tower in the middle of this frozen desert a few miles away from the main base. The cause ? Poe. And you too but just a tiny little bit.

"I hate you." Your fellow pilot groans from the window.

Fortunately despite its abandoned state, the cabin is solid thanks to the stone protecting you from the wind. As half of its structure was dug into a cliff, warmth was not much of a problem. Well, that was the theory. And indeed, you got cursed with the cold coming from the gaps between the rocks and the building that actually forces you and Poe to keep a thick blanket wrapped around you all day and all night long.

"Mr Dameron, you are the only culprit in this room and for the hundredth time this week I beg you to stop whining about our predicament."

Looking like an obese duck in the two layers of thick grey and pale yellow fabrics, the pilot waddles towards the couch where you are already sitting before jumping on it. He is acting like a grumpy kid and honestly you don't mind that much. It's a blessing to see such a talented pilot not taking himself too seriously once out of his TIE. And he is physically pleasing. Which, of course, isn't a matter you would complain about.

"I won't stop because you laughed at my joke in case you forgot." He groans as he peers up at you. "I didn't force you to do so."

"Your sanction would still have been to end up there. And alone." You state with an unimpressed raised eyebrow. "I told you that your joke could wait a bit."

"Are you still my buddy or are you starting to turn into a boot-licker ?" He complains. "Joy killer."

You look at each other for a few seconds as he sits correctly on the couch and as as you tighten your blankets around you a loud laugh erupts from your throats.

"Come on that was a great joke." Poe whines as he comes closer in excitement. "Admit it. You can admit it you know."

"I wasn't saying it wasn't fun. It's just that making me laugh during a meeting wasn't necessary." You reply with a guilty smile.

"See ? I'm hilarious."

"Our exile is less hilarious though." You mumble as you look around you.

Your insufferable duo got sent there as a punishment and you do hope it's going to be the last time. The instructions had been clear right before your departure : look at your radars to report any abnormal and/or unexplained presences in the sky around the base. But due to the blizzard not any spaceship could even try to get outside. You miss your TIE and you are pretty sure Poe thinks the same.

The walls are cracked here and there, the furnitures covered in a thin layer of ice next to the windows, and you stuffed the holes between the structure and the cliff with heavy and old fabrics that got given to you. Apparently they were fully aware of how nightmarish it would be up there.

"Yeah. Yeah it's not fun I know." He says with a lower tone. "I'm sorry about that. I didn't know it would go that far."

"Don't worry. Well. I think I'm going to go to bed."

He nods and you only have to waddle towards the other side of the room to find the nest you created. Two mattresses lifted against the wall and covered in some thin bed sheets to make the walls of a cabin, and the ground covered in cardboard and some clothes to isolate you from the cold. It's narrow there but you never complained about it, for a good reason.

"Leave some room this time. I don't want my butt to freeze again." He whines behind you.

You smile while facing the wall. Your back is starting to hurt with all these nights spent in such uncomfortable positions but you forget about it pretty quick every time Poe joins you. After all there is no other space that could be used as a night place.

After a brief battle in your blankets not to get your improvised shelter to collapse over you, you feel his arms around you beneath the thick layer protecting the both of you from the cold. As always you close your eyes as his grasp tightens around you, an enjoyable shudder finding its path all over your body.

"Stop being so... so icy." He mumbles against your nape.

"Icy ? I'm not icy. I'm freezing."

"Picky when it comes to uselessly precise words."

"Next time you'll say I'm ice cubed."

"No, you're blizzarded."

"You go get blizzarded dumbass." You whisper.

You laugh at the slight tap you receive on your cheek. It's as simple as that between you, a chaotic duo of friends risking their life daily for the First Order and joking around whenever they could. It doesn't let you indifferent but knowing how fast your female counterparts tend to swoon over this guy, you have told yourself many times that it was useless to try anything with him. He likes to flirt to joke but that was it. You are already grateful for finding a colleague comfortable with that.

"Now that we're completely isolated," he starts against your nape, "do you think we are going to stay here for long ? We don't have much food remaining."

"Yeah don't worry. You're still out best element when it comes to piloting skills. They won't give up on you despite your despicable sense of humor."

"Yours must be despicable too if you laughed that hard."

"Doesn't change the fact that yours is really the..."

You interrupt your sentence as you feel Poe's hand gracing yours. It doesn't take a genius to notice how cold they were even under the blankets.

"Poe you're sure you are warm ?"

"You're crushing my arm I can't feel it anymore." He complains.

"You only had to tell me before, idiot." You say as you lift your body up to let him enough room.

In this tiny tent there is not even enough room to sit up properly and rare are the nights you can spend with a good sleep due to the battlefield erupting from time to time. Not that you don't like it. Poe is funny and when this limbs-thing happens that means...

"Come here." You sigh as you hide your grin.

"Don't get accustomed to it." The elite pilot mumbles as he crawls on top of you to rest his weight on your body. "You being comfortable doesn't mean I appreciate your existence."

"Of course as you love it."

He doesn't answer and you let him tangle his legs with yours, his head resting on your chest as you feel his muscles relaxing slowly. Warmth is already easier to feel, spreading under the blankets as his frozen hands grab your clothes.

That is the best part of this exile according to you but you won't precise it in your report. No one needs to know how relaxing his embrace feels as a snowstorm is raging outside. Right now you only need to rest your hand on his back, your arms securing his body against yours.

"You sure that doesn't annoy you ?" Poe asks as you only have a mop of dark curls on view.

"Me sure." You answer and he snorts. "I'd have told you otherwise."

"Yeah. Wouldn't make it more awkward."

"It's not awkward." You say. "We need to survive in case you forgot."

"Yeah. Yeah true that. But isn't it dubious with your boyfriend ?"

You scoff at that. Poe is extremely intelligent when it comes to fight, calculations and how to make people laugh, but he tends to be late in sole other matters.

"Poe, do you think I would do what we are doing if I was still with him ?"

"Oh sorry I didn't know. Well I thought we were war buddies. We face death almost every day and hugs are not the most shocking thing I've seen. It's great."

The pilot looks down at you, his eyes fully alert focusing on your tired ones.

"You're already getting a hug," you mumble lazily, "don't expect me to sing you a lullaby."

"No I meant are you absolutely sure with your boyfriend stuff ?"

"Yes. I'm the one that broke up. So my boyfriend stuff is now my ex stuff."

"So is it gay to embrace a war buddy ?"

You chuckle uncontrollably at this. For a man successful with ladies he sure isn't afraid of playing with his sexuality. It's clearly refreshing but you know better and learned not to set your expectations too high.

"War buddy is the gayest expression ever. Are you gay ?"

"Uh no. Not that I know at least." He says in a lower voice.

"You're gay."

You were expecting a reaction from him but instead the man lies down on you again before rolling to the side in silence and battling with the mess formed by your entangled legs.

"I mean... I'm wondering a few things." He confirms under your surprised gaze. "I don't know. I mean I like women. They're great no problem. But I've never tried with a guy. So technically can I know if I'm into men or not ?"

"Uh... I don't know, have you felt like attracted to a man before ?"

You turn to face him, your muscles having a rough time with the cardboard beneath. Poe doesn't look that lunch flustered or embarrassed, mostly thinking.

"Yeah ? I've already wondered what it would feel like to kiss a man. I don't see why it would be different than to kiss a woman. Maybe beard would be strange to me."

"And more ?"

"A massive beard ? Wouldn't like to feel like drowning in that."

"I mean sex."

"Ah, now the big question." He mutters with a small smile. "I'd prefer to start with a kiss."

Between his soft voice and the way his expressive eyes lock with yours, you are pretty sure he is asking for your permission. Tonight is more than just some confession about his sexuality. Personally you wouldn't complain but the goal isn't to make him feel uncomfortable.

"Wouldn't you feel a bit... I don't know, strange about it ? We're friends. I'm okay with that but just so you know."

"Uh... no. No it's just a test. Just a kiss." He says before clearing his throat. "It's a simple kiss so... yeah. And you you know that more than I do. With men at least. And you make me feel comfortable with this subject. I won't ask some random Stormtrooper to kiss me."

That image makes you laugh a bit harder than he expected you to but it's good to see him relaxing.

"Ok. Well, whenever you want Mr war-buddy."

You would have expected him to test the waters, to move slowly, to chuckle nervously. Instead he goes right for your lips, his general experience undebatable. It's soft and strangely sensual for a guy testing but you guess he is just passionate like in any other thing he does in his life. He doesn't waste time to experiment and discover new things, he is more the kind of person running towards his center of interests even if this includes explosions.

As the great teacher you are you regain your composure, all too excited by what's happening to bother about him burning all the steps. As soon as you answer to the pressure of his mouth against yours his contact gains in intensity, enough to make you let his tongue poke yours a few times.

His hesitation is obvious as he stops the kiss but you soon realize that it's only to come stronger as the angle changes, his cold hands on your burning cheeks as he dares to get more active with his tongue. It takes you all the motivation in the world not to go down to his neck. Your breaths are struggling to keep quiet and soon enough you don't care much about it anymore.

"That's interesting." He states with half-closed eyes before clearing his throat again. "It... it feels good."

"Not disgusted or ashamed ?" You ask with a knowing smile.

"No. No no that's... that's quite the opposite to be fair." He whispers. "It feels better than with most women but maybe I need to be extremely certain and try again. We never know."

You don't retreat as he pounces on your lips again and soon you remember how eager you were back in the days. With a little smile you manage to make him rest on his back, unsurprised to feel his excitement down there, and surprised by how eager he gets as he nods impatiently.

- - - -

Thank you for reading, please comment and reblog if you liked it !

@salome-c @stevenngrant @lavenderluna10 @one-hell-of-a-disappointment @dailyreverie @thecursivej @lady-targaryen @general-latino @harrys-tittie @laura-naruto-fan1998 @later-gators12

#poe dameron x you #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron x male reader #fo!poe #first order poe

[thegreatallie]

This was a wild start to the New Year for me.

(someone please tell me if I did the image IDs wrong.)

Now, if there’s one thing about me I’d like you to know, it’s that I love adventure games. I was raised on classic Sierra point and click games, especially King’s Quest, and I love everything about them. They’re the perfect mixture of cinematic and interactive, the puzzles range from genius to bullshit, and they kill you in increasingly absurd ways the more you play. I lamented their death so hard and to this day I still do. Even when they make a rare reappearance, they’re just not the same, especially since the few they do make these days follow the LucasArts model of not killing you in ridiculous ways you couldn’t possibly see coming.

Anyway, years ago my brother showed me this article from OldManMurray.com, discussing his theory behind the death of adventure games.

In the article, he dreams up a new mascot for adventure gaming, who he calls Francis the Talking France.

I can’t tell you how hard I laughed the first time I met Francis the Talking France. I was taking French in college at the time and I don't even know how many times I had to try not cracking up in class because something reminded me of him. I even have this specific voice I do for maximum hilarity. It's probably not that funny, actually, but I only do it for me so it entertains the right audience at least. 

However, the years went by, and eventually it got to the point where I only occasionally remembered this article. And when I did, it was about how ridiculous that puzzle was. I mean, seriously. The entire puzzle requires you following this convoluted and unhinged train of logic to make a fake mustache when the person you’re impersonating doesn’t even have a mustache how am I supposed to know to do that what is wrong with you Jane Jenson I love you but this is kind of a lot. As time went on I rarely thought of myself thinking of Francis at all.

I was reminded of him out of the blue when I was making a list of foreign language songs on my mp3 player. I have about 18 songs in French, 50 in Japanese, 3 in German, and a handful of others. I was riffing on the word France to myself, trying to come up with some amusing sounds, when I remembered there was the name of this mascot I used to love. I didn’t even remember his name, I had to keep doing mouth sounds trying to remember what name sounded like France until I remembered the name Francis exists. But I remembered and cracked up all over again. It’s funny how, out of nowhere, things from our past can suddenly make themselves remembered almost as if on their own.

But that’s only half the story.

The other half begins last summer, when I first played the game The Stanley Parable. I'd heard of the game before, but never anything about it except that it was a very artsy game on the nature of choice. I wasn't interested in learning more because I was worried it would be up its own ass about it and I can't deal with that. But what changed my mind was this tumblr post.

I don't care if it's the most pretentious art game in the world, I have got to see what the thematic opposite of the Sims looks like. So I got the game and gave it a spin.

First off, I'm not ashamed to say I was 100% wrong. This is not at all the kind of art I hate. I don't want to get in too much detail about my opinions about art because it's not the point, I just want to say that the Stanley Parable works on so many levels that even if you disagree with the message you think it's trying to send (and it's hard to tell because it can be interpreted in so many ways, some of them contradictory) you can still have fun being a horrible little gremlin pissing off the Narrator, who does a fantastic job carrying the entire game on its shoulders. I love The Stanley Parable.

So anyway, in December, I was looking for more Stanley Parable videos on YouTube. I regret that I don't even know which video this was, but one of the jokes in it went like this: it was the scene from the Team Fortress 2 video "Expiration Date" where Spy places a bucket on the table and it goes:

Spy: Gentlemen, this... is a bucket. Soldier: Dear God... Spy: There's more. Soldier: No...

and it was captioned something like, "The entire Stanley Parable Fandom" or something like that. I laughed.

Then I remembered that I hadn't actually watched that TF2 video since it came out in 2014. My brother showed it to me when I came home for the weekend, saying it just came out and talking about why it was made and all the little trivia about it. I watched it, I laughed, I had fun, and then moved on with my life. I was never into Team Fortress 2, though I've been aware of it the entire time it's existed. It's just not my kind of game and, while the humor was funny, it always came off as kind of... tryhard, I guess? I don't know. It's actually hard for me to describe my opinion then because I no longer hold it.

But basically, back in its heyday my brother showed me TF2 memes and explained why they were funny, and I laughed. I used to do voice work for this teenage boy who also would talk about it, and I'd listen. I even remember watching the Meet the Pyro video the day it dropped and everyone on My Little Brony was talking about it, and thinking it was okay at best. I did love the cosplays of Spy undercover at other conventions, like at a brony convention in a Twilight mask about to stab a Pinkie Pie in the back or something.

I have no idea what changed in me, but this time when I watched Expiration Date it was the funniest shit I'd ever seen in my life. I laughed so hard I almost cried. And then I went back and watched all of the Meet the Team videos and laughed just as hard, even at the Meet the Pyro video. And suddenly I'm trying to get all the content I can like my life depended on it. For 15 years this game meant nothing to me and now that it's basically dead suddenly it's the only thing that matters? Why is that? Who can say? All I can do is enjoy the ride.

And then it happens. Two days after re-reading my favorite piece on the death of adventure gaming with a mascot I'd forgotten existed, I was on Issue #3 of the Team Fortress comic when I come across this image

His fucking shirt.

I swear, this wouldn't have been so bizarre if it weren't for the fact that, for a completely unrelated reason, this was the second time I'd thought about Francis in years, to the point where I had forgotten his name. Then I thought about him completely randomly, again, for the first time in years, only two days before actually seeing him for the first time in years, except for re-reading that article on purpose. If I had just seen Francis on Baby Scout's shirt I would have been, "Oh, wow! Awesome, I remember Francis! But what's he doing here? This requires research." It feels almost suspicious that I was thinking about him for the first time in years because my mouth felt like making sounds.

And like, I only got to this comic because I ended up playing not one, but two old games that are so outside the scope of what I usually play that they almost passed me by completely. Seriously, The Stanley Parable is nine years old, and Team Fortress 2 is 15 years old. If I hadn't seen that one Tumblr post, I probably wouldn't care about either of these games.

THE SYNCHRONICITY OF THIS OSTENSIBLE "COINCIDINCE" IS NOT LOST ON ME. NOSIR.

I had to look up dates because I was momentarily miffed thinking that the hilarious Adventure Gaming Mascot had been a TF2 reference this whole time and I'd been duped, only to realize that no, the article definitely predated the game's release and the guys behind the website worked for Valve so it makes sense Francis would find his way into a Valve property.

It just... it blows my mind in a way I don't think I can really get across to anyone who's just reading it and probably not nearly as impressed by it as I am, but... come on, it's gotta be something, right?

(also, as an unrelated footnote, SpyDad is my other raison d'être)

#team fortress 2 #adventure games #francis the talking france

[hithelleth]

Look, I went into watching TROP with the mindset that it is fanfic, and it has worked perfectly: I don't care about whatever digressions from Tolkien's work they make (especially considering even he was undecided on some things), it's all AU anyway.

However, they could at least be consistent within their own show?

Like if you mention that you're landing at Pelargir and then riding on but the next day your camp from which the ship sails seems to be right by the sea/Anduin while the Southlanders being at the same camp appear to have quite a way to travel to the same said Pelargir. FFS. It's a small detail, but it bothered me.

I am not even going into the ridiculousness of people (or elves, same thing), surviving a pyroclastic flow (uhhhhhhh, I watched to many volcano disaster movies and documentaries for that) for the purpose of episode-long tragedy porn. As if these people haven't gone through and aren't facing enough (far more credible) tragedy already anyway.

On a lighter note, two crack theories, below the cut (because of possible spoilers, IDK).

Crack theory one: Adar = Celeborn. 🤣

No, listen, what if he got captured in one of the wars and corrupted into an orc. Pardon, Uruk. So he might not be enough of a Celeborn left to overcome the corruption, but there is some of him there as he actually cares (which completely evil entitles don't) about his orc 'children' (and as he 'killed' Sauron.) And then something in the following season(s) can bring him back.

(Crack) theory two: the priestess(?)/whoever the white figure person is = Sauron

But Sauron is male, right? Well, Sauron is Maia and Maia can choose to adopt which ever form they find pleasing. Why would Sauron not choose to be female (or agender or gender-fluid) at some point, just for shits and giggles. Pre fall-of-Numenor Sauron could definitely do it if he chose to.

(This one is actually likely, I think, because I saw the priestess's promo photo in an article (or two?) about Sauron ? Did they put it there to hint or mislead? We'll find out soon enough.)

LOL, don't take these too seriously, they are just something that popped into my head.

#The Rings of Power #trop meta #my meta: trop

[defectivegembrain]

Social Psychology is a very funny Community episode, but it also confuses me to the point of somewhat ruining the joke. So *attempts to crack knuckles, doesn't really know how* allow me to ruin the joke. Seriously if you're gonna read this, please ignore the fact that I'm talking about a sitcom. I'm going fully indulgent on taking things too seriously here.

First of all, why would people be having breakdowns? I'm not the best at predicting human behaviour sure, but I think most people left in a room that long waiting for an experiment to start would just leave after a while? Maybe with a slight complaint or eye roll or just "sorry I don't have time for this?" And I think there'd probably be chatter among them, maybe someone would go through to ask what was going on? I just don't think most people would just go "well I guess I have no choice but to sit here and do nothing until I'm so overwhelmed I can't control myself"?

Secondly, I know Duncan is not meant to be a great psychologist, but jfc you really think a single outlier ruins your whole theory? An outlier who is very obviously different from most people, in a way you yourself mentioned, albeit in a pretty offensive way? Sure it might be annoying to deal with in your paper or whatever, but it's not that big a deal, in fact it could lead to more research? Talk to Abed, get it confirmed that he's autistic, study how more autistic people respond?

Also like, I get Abed's reaction, I get wanting to wait because friends, but how the fuck wasn't he like, visibly exhausted and desperate to go to the toilet? Are your bodily functions running on pure friendship energy my dude?

#community show #this post is sponsored by my own autism #and by the community youtube channel recently posting this full episode

[dimpledlavendeer]

Again because Hee just has the prettiest lips 🖤

This is a bit long bc I couldn't help myself 😩 and a bit suggestive

Making out with Heeseung pt. 2

Hot version

We all know that Hee is a duality king

I mean he definitely likes hot concepts more than cute ones but the things is HEE ROCKS BOTH VERSIONS

Like Hee can stare at you all hot and teasy way

But then the next second he can pout and use his adorable doe eyes to melt your heart

Let's say if he is in mood to tease and see how crazy he can make you

THEN BELIVE ME WHEN I SAY HEE CAN MAKE YOU BEG FOR A KISS OMG-

Let's just say Hee is really dressed up that day

I mean in his regular style but well somehow Hee is even HOTTER that day

And Hee realizes that you just keep staring at him

Well this amuses him ;)

So Hee decides to test his theory on you to see if he can make you go crazy

Waits until you two are alone at a room

When others leave he just locks you inside with him ;)

You're like :000

"What are you doing Heeseung?"

"I realized we didn't get any alone time today baby"

"Alone time?" Your voice cracks because of the small smirk on his face but you try to cool it off bye continuing with "well you and me were both busy today"

"But I missed you baby" Hee says while stepping closer

You start to step backwards as he keeps getting closer because YOUR CHEST WAS ABOUT TO EXPLODE AND HEE WAS LOOKING TOO GOOD TO BE CLOSE WITH AT THE MOMENT

You again attampt to be cool by saying "I missed you too :)"

"Then show me"

"Show you what?"

"How much you missed me... did you miss me me as much as I missed you?" Hee said stepping forward one last time and you felt your back touching against the wall

Hee looked so hot, he just got out of practice and he was slightly sweaty

His lips were looking pinker than ever and that made them too irresistible to not kiss

You couldn't stop your gaze from keep falling onto his lips and well he was too sly to miss that happening

He was still breathing heavier than normal as an after affect of the practice and that was also something that made you crazy

The ends of his hair were sticking to his face due to sweat and the hat he was wearing just made it look hot

You were just staring at his face and you were sure it was obvious what you were thinking doing so

Hee was just enjoying this moment thinking how long you were gonna resist

But Hee wasn't gonna go easy on you ;)

"Is there something you wanna say to me baby?" Hee said blowing his hot breath to your face while moving closer

You were just watching him, eyes focused on his lips

"Or should i ask is there something you want me to do for you?" Hee corrected himself

You couldn't take it anymore and you gathered all the confidence you had to respond to him although his presence made you feel so small atm

"Yes..actually there is something Heeseung, will you help me with it?"

"Anything baby just name it"

"Kiss me then"

A cute grin started to form on his face while he was trying so hard to contain his seriousness to tease you

"Kiss you? Why would you need me to do that, Can't you kiss me on your own?"

"You said you would help with anything tho"

"I guess this is something you need to help yourself y/n, my lips are here and nothing is stopping you" he whispered while his lips were barely away from yours by an inch

"Heeseung please"

"Please what?"

"Please kiss me"

"Do it yourself" he said licking his lips to test your nerves once more

You gripped on his shirt pulling him even closer if that's possible but still not kissing him

That made him smile "I didn't know you were this scared to go get what you want y/n honestly I th-"

You cut his words by finally kissing him

He let out a small moan because of this sudden action of yours while smashing you against that wall and deepening the kiss

His tongue was now involved in the game and it wanted to intertwine with yours

You weren't gonna give in that easily so you just bite his lower lip teasing him and making him impatient

He pulled off and said "Be good y/n"

"Be patient Heeseung"

And you just dive into his neck kissing and sucking his soft skin

When you reached the crook of his neck you just stopped there and leave a wet kiss knowing this was his weakness

He hissed and grabbed your jaw to make you look at him

"You're being too bold for someone who was begging me to kiss her a second ago"

"And you are being too impatient for someone who said I could help myself with it Heeseung. So what now you're needy?"

"I'm not needy y/n"

"Oh you're just too desperate for a kiss then huh Hee?"

You regretted that you said that after seeing how his eyes got even darker but it was too late now and you weren't gonna back off

"What did you just call me?"

"I think you heard me pretty well"

"Let me show you what desperate is then y/n" he said and just smashed his lips on yours

His hands found yours and lead them behind your back while you were still standing against a wall

Now he was keeping your hands together with one of his hands behind you and his other hand was just making its way down from your waist to your hips

He squized your flesh slightly but it was enough to get a small moan from you

You could feel his satisfied smile against your lips while he was continuing to kiss you deeper than ever

His lips were placing wet kisses everywhere starting from your lips and moving on with your neck

He had no mercy after you called him "desperate" and tbh he didn't even care about the marks that will form on your neck because of his bites on your soft skin

You were going crazy and you definitely wanted more but it wasn't the place nor the time for it

"Heeseung please"

He ignored you and kept teasing your skin with his tongue which was making you crazy

You managed to say his name again breathing deeply and he still ignored you

Until you say "Heeseung I'm begging please"

Now you had his attention and he raised his head to look you in the eyes

"What is it y/n? You're too desperate for more?"

Honestly you were and considering your situation you had no power to tease him back so you gave up

"Yes Heeseung I am okay? I am desperate for you to touch me" you said not even knowing how you sounded because everything besides him was just unclear atm

"But not now and not like this Heeseung please okay?" you moved on by saying this

He just looked at your eyes for a while and then your lips

He kissed you one more time

Fixed your hair and then his hat

"Just wait until we're home, Don't even think I will let this slide y/n"

"Oh Heeseung I don't want you to let this slide" you said smirking

He liked the way you replied and kissed your cheek softly

"I love you" Hee said before unlocking the door to get out

"I love you too"

click here for the soft version 🖤

#enhypen #heeseung #enhypen heeseung #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #lee heeseung #enhypen fanfiction #heeseung imagines #heeseung scenarios #heeseung fanfiction #enhypen x reader #heeseung x reader #yaren writes

[rozcdust]

DEI MY LOVE I AM BACK FROM THE HOLIDAYYYYYY~ but i only have around 3 days more before I got swamped up in the sea of assignments and tests (i have 3 tests and an assignment due next week and the following week is also fully filled with uni demands pls pray for my sanity)

also once again im not able to go crazy with the reblog T-T buttttt imma do it here ehe YOUR 2 NEW UPDATES ONCE AGAIN!

FIRST OFF RAN X Y/N BESTIES AGENDA GOING STRONG I'M LOVING THIS SO MUCH AAAAAA it literally reminded me of the Fighting Dog but now we're in the parallel universe so to say but butttt imagine this in the parallel universe, and Ran, Rin being y/n's platonic soul protector that's why their roles are pretty much almost the same in She's Mean and Fighting Dog (I remember Ran and Rin said they considered FD's y/n as close friend almost sibling). Same goes to the petshop trio. In this parallel universe they're binded to y/n since in the original universe they aren't able to help her (maybe they wished they could had done much more so in this parallel universe their wishes came true and so that's why they're protective of y/n babying her tryna feed a tiger veggies ehe) don't take this too seriously tho I'm just analysing it in my own way making up stuffs and theories hshhshs.

I knew how much crack you gonna put in the updates and luvvvvv u didn't disappoint at all i love u so much aaaaa <33 PLS SANZU AND RIN BEING CUTESY DRUNKARDS I WANNA SQUISH THEM SO BAD AND SANZU SCREAMING AKGSKDYEJJD. And y/n's reaction "I had men have that reaction before but not in this context" hsihdjsgx pls luvv you are making me fall in love with y/n so much more aaaaa y/n being a girl boss as always and then we have those simps jskshxjz I CAN SEE RAN TEAMING UP WITH Y/N TO TEASE KOKO. KOKO BEING JEALOUS IS EVERYTHING PLS. Ran is so amused with y/n pls I'm loving this agenda so much. Again those simps. SIMPS. KOKO, SANZU, RIN BEING SIMPS nskahsgjd they're too cute I'm literally cracking up so much. Thank you so much for the updates love it's amazing, you're wonderful in crafting words to bring out emotions be proud of your writings okay love?

p/s: my comments are too long hshshhs pls don't mind the theory though my brain decided to go yeet creative mode.

NO NO PLEASE YOUR COMMENTS ARE PERFECT I LOOK FORWARD TO THEM ALWAYS 😭

good luck with your exam honey! don’t tire yourself out too much okay, you got this 💖

AND I LOVE YOUR THEORIES THEY ARE AMAZING PLS CONTINUE TELL ME MORE BBYGRL AHA *fuckboi emoji face*

and thank you so much for your kind words pls 😭 kith 💖💖

#💮deiasks #a #you are adorable #i love you #i’d die for you #mwah

[rpmemesbyarat]

RP meme from Scream Queens Ep 9 "Ghost Stories"

Damn straight I'm out in public.

I'm the master of disguise, baby.

Like, "are you not entertained?"

Yeah, no, no, everyone thinks I'm Joaquin Phoenix.

I just tell them it's part of my performance art piece.

I'm Joaquin Phoenix.

I'm sort of gay now, too.

Why are you dressed like that?

Sacagawea taught the pilgrims how to make cranberry sauce and then, like, sang "Blue Corn Moon" or something.

You know how you've been talking about taking our relationship to the next level?

Yeah, like, you know, like, the furniture just starts screaming, or, like, you'll crack open a Mountain Dew and you'll start to drink it and then it'll just turn to blood.

We're gonna have, like, the dopest time.

So let's all raise a glass to me.

I am about to be, like, super rich.

You can't spend Thanksgiving alone.

Oh, I am so glad neither of us have been killed.

I don't understand why you're making us bubble wrap each item of clothing.

When something costs $63,000, you wrap it in bubble wrap.

I think because I'm not allowed to carry a firearm, I like to pop the little bubbles, and then pretend like my finger is a gun.

I am personally being haunted by a ghost.

Wait, you-you-you seriously saw a ghost?

Put down the bubble wrap down.

Them Japanese got all manner of weird-ass ghost stories. And the one about the kappa is the creepiest of all. They live in the sewer. And they just waiting for you to sit your ass on the toilet, so they can reach up and grab your ass, snatch you by the vagina and drown your crushed body in raw sewage.

Why another story about a bathroom?

No more ghost stories!

I really have to pee. But there is no way I'm going anywhere near a toilet. So if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go look for a salad bowl to squat over under the stairwell.

Does somebody need another ghost story to scare away the heebie-jeebies?

You have come back to haunt us.

Ghosts walk among you every day; you would never know it.

Did you forget you're super gay?

Haven't you ever heard the phrase, "once you go black, you never go back"?

If I don't hear another ghost story right now, I might just have a stroke!

Then the killer could come in and chop off your head!

Let's all sit by the fireplace.

The killer could still be out there!

I need my lotions, my silk robe, my sensual massage oils, a bottle of champagne, and chocolate-covered strawberries.

I was a pretty amazing person when I was alive.

Maybe we can even date for a little while.

You faked your death.

Wait. This all makes sense-- of course you would fake your own death so no one would suspect you.

We both know how you got his birthmark on your hand! From when I stabbed you in your evil lair!

I am not staying in this house for a moment longer.

Call the cops. There's someone in the back seat of your car.

Okay, well, I'm really sorry about that, but you have to admit that what you were doing was super confusing.

I could have swore I saw someone. Granted I am pretty high on Adderall and I've been on the road for 35 hours straight.

I feel like you farted.

Your breath, it always smells like you just ate a cheeseburger.

It's like making out with the Hamburglar.

You, my friend, have a poo belly.

I only caught this kiss so I could throw it away.

That story is neither scary nor amazing.

Honestly, if you're going to get attacked, please attempt to get attacked in a fresh, exciting way.

We have to concentrate-- the pieces of this puzzle are coming together.

The police aren't going to help us.

You can't stop a ghost.

And guess what, bitch, I'm pregnant!

Packing matters to me. That's why I chose to minor in luggage sciences with an emphasis in packing theory.

I really screwed up.

I mean, most of the time we porked in a way that could not result in pregnancy, if you know what I mean. But I always knew I had a sackful of strong swimmers.

We make our beds and we lie in them.

You could still be my piece on the side.

I want you to pay.

You might even just pay the ultimate price.

Did you just threaten to kill me?

Am I just supposed to ignore the obvious fact that you hate me and love nothing more than playing super-humiliating pranks on me?

Why do you always have to make everything about you?

Like, remember that one time when you hacked into my mom's e-mail and wrote me this really long letter explaining how I was adopted and born with fetal alcohol syndrome and therefore, had an IQ in the low 60s?

I'm sorry, but that was hilarious. I stand by that prank.

[NAME], you cannot just run around murdering people.

I beg of you, do not have sex with him.

His blood is on your hands!

The only benefit of meeting you is that I now know I clearly have a type, and that type is a moron.

I'm gonna make sure that everyone you know knows that when we had sex, you asked me in baby talk if you could nurse from me.

Oh, I never say I'm sorry.

I see that you're enjoying the good life.

Are you about to break into song?

Are you about to break into song? Because all I'm hearing out of your mouth is, ♪ me, me, me, me, me. ♪

My mother would have understood.

It's a special champagne with triple the alcohol and a nicotine-y mouth feel, because it's infused with tobacco.

You're trapped in a web of lies, whore.

You're not leaving this room until you've peed on every single one of these pregnancy tests.

Fine, you got me. I'm not pregnant.

It's just that ever since you walked through those doors, I knew you were gonna be the one to take it all away from me.

You killed her!

#rp meme #rp memes #rp starters #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #roleplay memes #scream queens

[yaboymercury]

Ripping 9 to 5 - Farmer

John's city life fitted him perfectly, but sometimes it just became too much. Which is why he needed to escape to the countryside, back to his roots, just for a week or so to de-stress.

Going on another hike around the fields in the area he was staying, John couldn't help but appreciate the fresh air. Climbing over a fence into the next field, following what John thought was a public footpath sign, he sighed at the rustic beauty of the next field with its golden knee height wheat stretching for what looked like miles. It seemed that this was around the season of harvest for this crop however as about a quarter of the field had already been cut by a tractor slowly making it's route through the field.

As John began to wade through the crops at the edge of the field he was so engrossed in the beauty of the scene to he failed to notice that the sound of the tractor had stopped and the new sound of rustling through crops was getting ever closer to him.

"Oi what are you doing here?"

A rough voice jolted John out of his trance so aggressively that he stumbled backwards and fell down. From the uncomfortable floor of the field John looked up to see a disgruntled looking man. Unable to gather any thoughts John just took in the sight of him, tall, firm, visibly sweating, a light tan and a shirt with a considerable amount of buttons going unused. Still shocked all John could do was stutter at the man above him and try not to get to excited by just the sight of him.

"You do know this field is private property don't you?"

"Private?" Was all John could get out in response attempting to regain some composure in the face of the personification of his sexuality.

"Yup that sign in the gate says so" the piercing look he gave John made him quiver "So what are you doing here huh? You trespassing?"

The last question made John panic, realising the potential of the consequences, he sat up and with a little confidence says "No, no I'm just here hiking I must have gotten lost..."

The farmer seemed to relax a little after that but still looked a bit uncomfortable. Turning away from John to give some thought to what to do next, John was greeted with the sight of the man's bubbling ass barely being contained by a pair of tatty jeans. The jeans didn't leave much to the imagination with man holes and ladders of fabric especially concentrated around the ass area and specifically the crack. It couldn't have been practical but that wasn't what John was focused on. The area could have also been the area where the rugged man was the most sweaty with a natural musk radiating from the area. It did things to John's brain only making him want to get closer and lean in.

Pssssssssshhhhhh

It could have easily been mistaken for a gust of wind but John wasn't that stupid, and the raunchy cheesy odour which began to dominate John's senses backed up his theory. But he was now too busy wretching to do anything about it.

This was also the same time the farmer finally decided to let out a sigh and turn back around with a smile.

"I guess I can't blame you for getting lost, I'll take you back to the farmhouse and I'll find you a map to head you in the right direction."

But John was not able to accept the kindness as he was still gagging over the unbelievable stench of what could have only been some new strain of particularly toxic flatulence. Offering his hand to help John up the farmer realised his mistake.

"Oh sorry about that, it was dying to come out, but shit it really did a number on you..." Once John was up he had pretty much recomposed himself but was still in a state of shock from the fumes he had been exposed to, he wasn't even able to process how close he was to the glistening musky farmer. "Oh and I'm Andy by the way nice to meet you!"

Andy begun shaking John's hand, the force of his massive arms making John's stumble and was only able to mutter out his name.

Finally letting go Andy decided it would be quicker to get back to the farmhouse if they took the tractor so he lead John towards the hefty vehicle. While following John was able to take in the vision of the whole man in front of him, it was hard to keep his eyes of that ass though shaking in front of him. It was so eye catching that John didn't realise when Andy stopped suddenly causing him to walk right into it. Andy right leg was cocked up and before John could understand the pose he heard it.

FRRRRRRRAPPPPPPPPPPT

"Aww yeah that was a good one" Andy seemingly in his element barely registered what he was doing wasn't particularly normal "Oh I would apologize for what you're gonna get back there but you shoulda been looking where you were going." He said with a grin. The smell which finally hit John's nostrils was rough, a wave of cheesy stink thorwing him off guard.

While still disgusted at the man's stench John couldn't help but feel a certain kind of way about this man's rough attitude.

When they reached the tractor Andy was almost gentlemanly in helping John climb up into it first, the physical contact of his hands on him giving him a rush of excitement. But the feeling quickly wore off as when John took the only seat in the vehicle, Andy decided that the best way to deal with this was to dramatically sit his ass on John's lap.

"Ah sorry if I'm a bit heavy man, but hey at least you got the best view." rubbing his ass in a bit John realised that he wasn't wrong about either, with his ass and lower back eclipsing most of John's sight.

The past five minutes had wholly overwhelmed John with the duality of his flirtatious interactions with the man but also his unfortunate intimacy with his farts. But having the man so forwardly to practically give him a lap dance, meant that any chance of logical thinking had been abandoned.

When Andy started up the tractor the noise of the vehicle overpowered any chance of conversation meaning all John could do was attempt to enjoy the ride while not getting crushed by the hunk sitting on him. The terrain meant the ride was incredibly bumpy and becuase of this Andy's ass was vibrating all over John's crotch, it took all of his willpower to not immediately pop a boner but that was made even harder when Andy looked over his shoulder and gave John a smirk and a knowing wink. The shaking of Andy's ass seemed to increase and grow deeper and John couldn't tell why until it was made obvious by the smell hitting his nostrils. The rancid reeking stink of Andy's ass gas seemed neverending and the large vibrations on his lap seemed to carry on for minutes as well. And in spite of the sound of the machinery John could easily make out the growing sound of the gas coming straight from Andy's behind.

RRRRRRAAAAAPTTTT

The disgusting yet pleasureful sensation didn't seem to stop until right before the tractor stopped moving. By that time John's trousers had been permanently ingrained with the stink of Andy's rectum and his brain still remained indecisive on if he should flee from the stinking farm worker or never leave.

Finally getting off John's lap, Andy practically lifted him out of the tractor and with his now unchanging naughty smile he lead the still-groggy-from-over-exposure-to-flatulence John to the bench outside his humble farmhouse.

"I'm sorry if the ride was rough" he said obviously joking to John "I've gotten a couple complaints about bad smells I think it's something to do with the fuel I use.... definitely nothing to do with this!" smacking his massive jean clad ass as he finished to make obvious what he was referencing.

Andy gestured for John to lie down on the bench in front of the house since he was feeling so rough which John happily agreed to. John also didn't complain about the view when the farmer began unbuttoning most of his shirt obviously making himself as comfortable as he pleased.

"Now I obviously want to help you get on your way, but to be honest I recommend you get a nap first since you don't really seem to be in any condition to take in directions right now." Maybe it was his state of mind but John found this idea perfectly reasonable. "And of course if you can't get to sleep that easily I can always help..." With that the farmer slowly turned around chuckling lightly as he began to squat his gargantuan ass over John's face "See you on the other side."

BBBBBBBBBBRRRRRAPPTTT

And like that John was out.

John woke up in a bed he didn't recognise, but what he could recognise was the farmer now only in a pair of alarmingly tight worn out briefs sitting in a chair next to him. John was pretty sure he didn't just have morning wood, and it was clear to see with there being no sheets on the bed.

"Sometimes I forget how much power my gas has, it feels like you've been out for hours." Andy stood up to look over John, but unlike the intimidating farmer he met earlier in the day, this man had a much more sensual charming look in his eyes.

His crotch eye level with John Andy lifted his chin so they were looking straight at eachother "Not to be too forwards but out of everyone who's stumbled upon this farm you're the only one who's shown any kind of positive reaction to my expulsions." In saying positive reactions his eyes flitted over to John's obviously erect member. "So understand me if I don't really want to lose you too quickly."

This was a lot for John especially just after waking up, the man was a sight to behold, and he certainly seemed like he would be able to protect John but his gas was toxic, even if he did know how to use it well... just thinking about the day got John confused but further turned on.

"You see planting so many crops it would be very useful to have a bit of an air filter around since I do tend to kind of pollute the plants sometimes, like seriously do you hear this?" Jutting his ass out Andy let out a quick powerful blast.

PPPPRRRAP

It wasn't even facing John but the smell got the message across. It did feel like Andy never stopped farting but John was starting to realise that this was less and less of a problem for him. For the first time John's smile matched Andy's and he leaned closer to him from the bed.

"It's good to see that you agree with me, I think my ass does as well." With that Andy turned away from John but of course that meant his bulbous musky ass was closer than ever to John's face. And John didn't need any more of an invitation than that. Diving into the pillowy cheeks John knew this was where he belonged. And when the butt blew out a long explosive gust of toxic gas John's polluted brain was already getting hooked on the smell.

Later that week John realised how quickly he had gotten used to his new lifestyle as he stirred yet another can of baked beans on the stove. Bringing the plate of beans out to the front of the house the rugged farmer met him taking the plate and began to eat again, all he needed to thank him was to casually raise his leg and let his butt blow John a kiss.

FRRRRAAARP

When the Andy turned around to meet John's lustful stare with a Devilish grin, he knew the wave of stink had hit hard.

(Finally back, of course suggestions welcome as always but got some plans for new stories in the near future :)

#eproctophilia #fart #fart story #fartfiction #gay #gay fart #male fart #stink #flatulence #r9t5