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animusrox · 3 months

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TOP 10

Past Lives

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

How to Blow Up a Pipeline

Poor Things

Oppenheimer

Barbie

BlackBerry

The Holdovers

The Iron Claw

Killers of the Flower Moon

MY LETTERBOXD Grade A 11. The Killer 12. Beau Is Afraid 13. Dream Scenario 14. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 15. Godzilla Minus One 16. American Fiction 17. They Cloned Tyrone 18. Evil Dead Rise 19. Eileen 20. The Artifice Girl 21. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem 22. Talk to Me 23. Reality 24. Leave the World Behind 25. A Thousand and One 26. Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One 27. Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. 28. Theater Camp 29. Carmen 30. Merry Little Batman 31. Priscilla 32. Society of the Snow 33. Infinity Pool 34. Enys Men 35. Sanctuary 36. Rye Lane 37. Skinamarink 38. Monster 39. Anatomy of a Fall 40. Landscape with Invisible Hand 41. Reptile 42. Sisu 43. Pinball: The Man Who Saved the Game 44. No One Will Save You 45. Tetris 46. May December 47. The Zone of Interest 48. V/H/S/85 49. Dumb Money 50. El Conde 51. Arnold 52. Maestro 53. Napoleon 54. 20 Days in Mariupol 55. Influencer 56. The Creator 57. Origin 58. Thanksgiving 59. Next Goal Wins 60. The Boy and the Heron 61. Bottoms 62. Wonka

[Press Keep Reading For The Full Graded List]

Grade B

63. God Is a Bullet 64. No Hard Feelings 65. Joy Ride 66. Fair Play 67. Cocaine Bear 68. NYAD 69. Asteroid City 70. Nowhere 71. The Angry Black Girl and Her Monster 72. Divinity 73. The Equalizer 3 74. The Last Voyage of the Demeter 75. Venus 76. Butcher’s Crossing 77. Somewhere in Queens 78. The Persian Version 79. Boston Strangler 80. Polite Society 81. Miguel Wants to Fight 82. The Color Purple 83. The Royal Hotel 84. Saw X 85. All of Us Strangers 86. Fallen Leaves 87. Ferrari 88. Elemental 89. Peter Pan & Wendy 90. Renfield 91. Cat Person 92. Scream VI 93. The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes 94. BS High 95. Blue Beetle 96. Huesera: The Bone Woman 97. When Evil Lurks 98. Dark Harvest 99. A Good Person 100. Final Cut 101. Knock at the Cabin 102. Quiz Lady 103. Leo 104. Air 105. The Super Mario Bros. Movie 106. Batman: The Doom That Came to Gotham 107. John Wick: Chapter 4 108. Beaten to Death 109. The Wrath of Becky 110. Passages 111. Transformers: Rise of the Beasts 112. Gran Turismo 113. 65 114. Sick 115. Sister Death 116. The Blackening 117. Please Don’t Destroy: The Treasure of Foggy Mountain 118. Flamin’ Hot 119. Nimona 120. Cobweb 121. Totally Killer 122. What’s Love Got to Do with It? 123. Sharper 124. Unseen 125. Dunki 126. Bird Box Barcelona 127. The Marvels 128. Shazam! Fury of the Gods

Grade C

129. Wildflower 130. Freelance 131. M3GAN 132. Strays 133. Sympathy for the Devil 134. Creed III 135. Chevalier 136. The Marsh King’s Daughter 137. A Haunting in Venice 138. The Little Mermaid 139. Silent Night 140. Master Gardener 141. The Flash 142. Fast X 143. The Pope’s Exorcist 144. Saltburn 145. Kandahar 146. Stand 147. Plane 148. Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny 149. Fingernails 150. Quicksand 151. Fool’s Paradise 152. Migration 153. Rustin 154. The Covenant 155. Good Burger 2 156. The Pod Generation 157. Alice, Darling 158. Insidious: The Red Door 159. Missing 160. Shotgun Wedding 161. You Hurt My Feelings 162. The Boogeyman 163. Showing Up 164. Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom 165. Champions 166. Consecration 167. The Nun II 168. Biosphere 169. House Party 170. The Exorcist: Believer 171. Big George Foreman 172. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves 173. Children of the Corn 174. The Beanie Bubble 175. Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania

Grade F

176. Anyone But You 177. Marlowe 178. Paint 179. Extraction 2 180. It Lives Inside 181. Deliver Us 182. Trolls Band Together 183. Finestkind 184. Corner Office 185. Wish 186. Prisoner’s Daughter 187. Pain Hustlers 188. Foe 189. The Mother 190. Old Dads 191. Ghosted 192. Ruby Gillman, Teenage Kraken 193. Haunted Mansion 194. Mafia Mamma 195. Five Nights at Freddy’s 196. The Machine 197. Justice League: Warworld 198. We Have a Ghost 199. What Comes Around 200. Legion of Super-Heroes 201. The Boys in the Boat 202. Attachment 203. Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre 204. About My Father 205. You People 206. Meg 2: The Trench 207. Pathaan 208. Rebel Moon - Part One: A Child of Fire 209. Assassin 210. Dalíland 211. Vacation Friends 2

Bottom 10

212. Sound of Freedom 213. Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey 214. When You Finish Saving The World 215. Heart of Stone 216. Family Switch 217. Expend4bles 218. Sweetwater 219. Hypnotic 220. 80 for Brady 221. Spinning Gold

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wen-kexing-apologist · 9 months

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Only Friends, Boston, and Queer Culture

I wanted to talk a little bit about an observation that I made about Boston and how he acquires sex partners (i.e. who he picks up, how he picks them up, where he picks them up, and where he chooses to have sex). Now, again, we are only two episodes in so I will not presume to make a pattern of anything quite yet, and I am looking forward to seeing how my current observations shift in light of any new information coming out of future episodes. But, it was notable to me that the only times Boston has been seen actively pursuing a second sexual encounter with someone is either in public spaces or after he has had sex with them in public.

Because Boston is very sexual, we actually have a lot of data points on him already, (and will likely get many more, seeing as Boston has been in 5 out of 7 of the heavy makeout/sex scenes in the show so far). What we have seen so far is a one night stand with Drake’s character after Boston is picked up at a bar and brought back to unnamed-Drake-character’s apartment; Boston returning for a second and third sexual encounter with Nick after he and Nick fuck for the first time in the cellphone repair shop; and Boston openly flirting with and trying to tempt Top in to sex in exclusively public spaces.

Cruising

What is Cruising and Why is it Important?

Photograph by Steven Barker

I realize that there are many people here who may be unfamiliar with the term/concept of ‘cruising’. As a self-defined “baby gay” there are many terms that came out of the past decades’ queer culture that I was and am personally unfamiliar with. As such, I wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page with the terminology. “Cruising” is a code-word/gay slang that refers to an individual or individuals ‘walking or driving around a locality, called a cruising ground, in search of a sex partner, usually of the anonymous, casual, one time variety’ (Wikipedia).

In her essay Respectable promiscuity: Digital cruising in an era of queer liberalism, Jody Ahlm (then PhD candidate, now Dr.) states the following: “Cruising traditionally occurs in bars, clubs, or public spaces such as parks and public restrooms where men generally signal sexual interest in another man through established non-verbal signals (Be ́rube ́, 1996; Delany, 1999; Humphreys and Rainwater, 1975; Tewksbury, 2002).”

For the sake of simplicity, cruising is a term applied to the action of (usually, but not exclusively) gay men seeking out casual sex in public spaces.

Cruising is and was an important aspect of queer culture, for a number of different reasons. “Tearooms” or private public spaces that were adapted to accommodate gay sex (public bathrooms, for example). While a benefit of tearooms was instantaneous sex, a much more important and notable aspect of tearooms was who in the queer community was frequenting these cruising locations

Of the bar crowd in gay (homosexual) society, only a small percentage would be found in park restrooms. But this more overt, gay bar clientele constitutes a minor part of those in any American city who follow a predominantly homosexual pattern. The so-called closet queens and other types of covert deviants make up the vast majority of those who engage in homosexual acts- and these are the persons most attracted to tearoom encounters…It may be more surprising for the outside to discover that most of these [tearoom participants] are married. Indeed, 54 percent of my research subjects are married and living with their wives. (Tearoom Trade, Laud Humphreys, 1970)

In short, cruising and cruising locations are important to ensuring that men who have sex with men (MSM) who are closeted, married, or do not frequent bars, have an opportunity to engage in sex with other men. (Tradition of sex cruising at Aquatic Park to end. John Geluardi, 2001)

How Cruising has Changed Over Time

Overall, cruising is a lot less popular now than it was in the 1960s and 1980s, in part due to the AIDs epidemic and concerns of HIV transmission (Ahlm, 2017). Ahlm’s essay argues that the AIDS epidemic “initiated a trend toward monogamy among gay men” and that apps like Grindr have shifted the landscape of sexual interest and politics towards a “contested cultural space where publicness and privateness co-exist, creating tensions for self-presentation that are structured by contemporary sexual politics.”

Sociologists have identified a shifting in cruising culture from public, in-person spaces to private, online spaces. In her research, Ahlm noted that none of her subjects who used Grinder reported engaging in public or semi-public sex or being asked to engage in public or semi-public sex by another person. So we are seeing the landscape of where and how gay men engage in sex shift ever increasingly towards private spaces. We can ask ourselves why that may be:

Dalton (black/mixed,5 28) says,”People like to maintain a certain image of themselves, and everybody wants to appear chaste but desirable at the same time, and whatever. People will say ‘‘Oh you’re going on there and you’re trying to do that [find sex], I just talk to people and I never do anything.’’ I’m like ‘‘Sure, right’’ [sarcastic tone].” The multiplicity of intentions on Grindr allows for plausible denial of promiscuity, while the app’s reputation requires constant management of the stigma in order for that denial to be plausible. Like the majority of users, Dalton’s profile says he is on the app for ‘‘Friends, Chat, Networking.’’ However, sexual interaction is the goal of his in-person meetings, and he only chats with people he finds attractive and would potentially like to have sex with. This contradiction between stated intentions and actual use is not unique to Dalton’s Grindr use, it is the rule rather than the exception (Ahlm, 2017)

While privacy can be a valued aspect of people’s personal life experiences, shifting cruising culture to major online spaces designed specifically for gay people, and having sex with people who connect across mobile apps, is contributing to respectability politics:

Shifting cruising to private spaces—both actual sex acts and the practices associated with finding a sexual partner in a public space, furthers the sanitation of gay physical spaces. Users can meet sexual partners without ever leaving home, and public gay spaces become sites for platonic socializing. Gay men go to the bars with their friends to hang out, not to cruise…The performance of cruising is desexualized by the plausible deniability of using a phone app and the plausible deniability of Grindr itself, as discussed earlier. It is not just public sex that is disappearing, so too is the public pursuit of sex. This is not to say that gay bars have been completely desexualized…However, as Orne (2016) shows in his ethnography of Chicago’s Boystown, they are the cultural markers that make the neighborhood a popular place for bachelorette parties ‘‘on safari’’. They are not the same as a visible collective practice of searching for and choosing a sexual partner for the night, regardless of where the sex occurs later. (Ahlm, 2017)

TL;DR: The act of looking for sex partners and engaging in public or semi-public sex as a result (“cruising”) has been steadily phasing out as a practice in gay culture, heading towards more private sexual encounters with sex partners who meet on mobile apps, ultimately resulting in a sanitized image and partial desexualization of gay spaces/bars.

Boston’s Cruising Habits

When I was reading that Ahlm piece, I could not help but think about our very first introduction to the characters of Only Friends in Episode 1. The show opens at a gay bar, we go around listening to Mew’s descriptions of what archetypes his friends fit in to, at which point we learn that everyone in attendance at the bar that particular evening are wearing wristbands indicating their availability to be hit on. Which is making me feel like Jojo and co. (Ninew, Den, the rest of the writing crew) are placing their characters in a past gay culture, giving them an opportunity to return to roots of public cruising. Not every character will engage in such activities, but we know for a fact that Boston and Top are cruising in some capacity from the outset of the show (Boston trying to talk his way into a threesome with Bar Stranger #1, Boston getting picked up by Bar Stranger #2 [aka unnamed-Drake-character], Top striking up conversation with Mew after Mew bumps into him), and with the direct references Jojo and co. are making to Queer As Folk (UK) (1999) if the goal of Only Friends is to highlight queer culture, I would not be surprised.

While we are only two episodes in at the time I am writing this, it was intriguing to me that Boston appears to be one of the few characters engaging in more traditional cruising culture. It is clear that most of the main characters frequent Yo’s bar, though it appears the friend group uses the space more as a place to hang out with one another, rather than a space to cruise. All except for “The Hunter”, Boston, who is seen constantly attempting to pick up, or being picked up by other queer men in a bar setting. We know that Top also frequents the bar, and we have not as of yet seen him with any other friends, so we can presume that Top spends his time at Yo’s bar cruising as well (based on the fact that he has slept with Boston and he did hit on Mew at the bar, but we don’t have any definitive evidence of that yet because we don’t know how Top and Boston met, and Top has only actively been pursuing Mew thus far).

A trend I saw in the first two episodes when it comes to Boston that I find particularly noteworthy (aka, is a trend I want to track as the show progresses to see if that trend continues), is that Boston is only ever repeating sex with people who engaged in public sex with him in the first place. From flashbacks we see Top and Boston making out in a photobooth, an implication there that Top and Boston then fucked in the photobooth since “once was enough” for Top and Boston. The first time that Boston and Nick fuck, they do so in the aisle of the cellphone repair shop. Nick may turn off the lights, but that does not negate the fact that there is a chance that Boston and Nick may be walked in on and caught by an unassuming customer. When Boston hits on Top, it is in a public space: the bathrooms of Yo’s bar, when Boston attempts to initiate a second sexual encounter with Top, it again is in a public space: the locker room/showers at the wakeboarding place.

Public Sex, Photography, and Brewing Thoughts about Boston

Image by @nongnaopat

While I was reading up on cruising, I came across a couple articles with quotes and observations that immediately made me think of Boston, and a question started brewing in my mind:

Is Boston a physical manifestation of the queer hookup cultures 60s-80s?

Boston’s Personality v. Public Sex

Again, we have only seen two episodes of Only Friends so I am not yet secure in my own interpretations of Boston. However, I was thinking about the conversations that occurred the other day about how Boston must exert control over others (@respectthepetty), and how he is ready and willing to meddle in Mew’s life by trying to seduce Top, but that there is noticeable fear and slight panic at the thought that Mew might catch him and Top together in the shower (@stuffnonsenseandotherthings).

There was something that just spoke to me so strongly about Boston’s character archetypes in relation to the conversations brought up in Chapter 6: Tearoom Trade: Tales of Public Sex of the book Marginal People in Deviant Places: Ethnography, Difference, and the Challenge to Scientific Racism by Janice M. Irvine.

In this chapter, Irvine discusses the essay Tearoom Trade: Impersonal Sex in Public Spaces written by Laud Humphreys. Within this chapter, Irvine states “Humphreys argued that tearoom participants varied in vulnerability to risk of exposure. He noted that married men and men who did not have career autonomy were highly vulnerable to negative consequences if discovered in the tearooms.” (Note: my understanding of “tearooms” from this reading is that they are public restrooms that have been transformed to better support instant sex, i.e. a broken window for a lookout, glory holes, walls removed between stalls, etc.) While an assumption could be made that vulnerable men would not engage in public sex, that assumption does not carry through to reality. Humphreys further claims that highly vulnerable men did still engage in public sex via tearoom visits, but they employed protective strategies to mitigate any suspicion of their queerness, often a hypermoral one.

I know “hypermoral” is not a term that anyone who has observed Boston for more than twenty seconds would really attribute to his character, but what did speak to me is what Humphreys says about the strategies employed by the highly vulnerable:

The secret offender may well believe he is more righteous than the next man—hence his shock and outrage, his disbelieving indignation, when he is discovered and discredited…Subjected to harsh social condemnation and legal penalties, the tearoom participant was likely to turn his anger and hatred on himself or others in his group. “Worse yet,” Humphreys argued, “he may justify himself by degrading others, displacing his hostility onto outgroups in the manner of the authoritarian personality.” (Irvine, 2022)

Now which Only Friend character are we thinking of based on the quote above?

“Hence his shock…when he is discovered…”

“The tearoom participant was likely to turn his anger and hatred on himself or others in his group”

“He may justify himself by degrading others”

One thing we do know about Boston is that he currently does not have career autonomy. He wants to be a photographer, but he is studying business because he may have to take over his father’s company (YouTube: Only Friends, Episode 2, Part 2/4, timestamp: 2:27). How much that pressure is really on him and how highly vulnerable Boston may be if caught engaging in gay, public sex remains to be seen, but to me it is worth noting. A research question to be asked: Why does Boston act the way he does? Is he vulnerable in some way and trying to compensate for it, or is just genuinely an asshole? Not sure, but I look forward to finding out.

An additional similarity that immediately came to mind in my readings and their relation to Boston was a reference to Rechy and his writings about male hustlers:

Rechy wrote about how male hustlers selling sex navigated the toilets. He cited the norms of the sexual marketplace with sociological precision: “Stand at the urinal long after youre [sic] through pissing. At the slightest indication of interest from someone in one of the cubicles, go up to him quickly before he gets any free ideas and say: ‘I’ll make it with you for twenty.’ (Irvine, 2022)

Boston is not a sex worker, he is not asking to be paid for his time, but the way he approaches Top in the bar bathroom to try to prompt a second sexual encounter does allude to the hustler culture. Top is standing at the urinal when Boston approaches

He strikes up conversation with Top who only really seems to be partially engaged, Top walks away from the urinal to wash his hands, Boston follows, placing his hands around Top’s, trying to proposition sex, appealing to their supposedly similar approaches to sex.

This is not a direct comparison to be sure, but I just wanted to mention it because it felt similar enough to be a reference. This reminded me too of the nod Jojo and Ninew had to gay male sexual culture in The Warp Effect when Alex has his shoulders massaged by a random patron propositioning sex at Jedi’s bar while he is standing at the urinals. Or to the more direct reference to cruising that Jojo and Aof put in to the character of Arm in Gay OK Bangkok, or Army in The Warp Effect (two pieces which I will continue to say are required viewings before [or at this point in conjunction with] Only Friends).

Boston’s Interest in Photography v. Public Sex Debates

Another aspect of Boston’s character that feels relevant to previous queer culture is his interest in photography itself, because photography has its own ties to tearooms and public sex.

In 1964, The Florida Legislative Investigative Committee “published a pamphlet that featured an explicit photograph of a man engaged in a sex act in a public restroom. The report, dubbed “the purple pamphlet,” was intended to shock readers and mobilize antigay repression.” (Irvine, 2022).

As a warning I am about to cite a pretty big chunk of text, but it is important information:

Photography became one of several technologies police and moral entrepreneurs used to observe and produce evidence of sexual deviance. Yet photographic surveillance could also be subverted. After the tearoom photograph was published in the 1964 Homosexuality and Citizenship brochure, conservatives attacked it as pornographic. The committee quickly removed it from the report, but the photograph was reprinted and vigorously marketed by Guild Press, a publisher of homoerotic materials. Gay pulp publishing was growing by 1964, and Guild Press, established in 1962, was no doubt gleeful to find and market this photograph. The Guild advertisement pointed out that this was the only “action photo” of a glory hole scene that had ever been in print, and as historian Thomas Waugh noted, “the glory hole photo became famous.”23 The “purple pamphlet” and its widespread dissemination was an early case of how social and religious conservatives played a significant role in making visible the sexual representation that they condemned. (Irvine, 2022)

Thinking about Boston and his interest in photography, we can notice another potential link to queer culture. Going in to Boston’s darkroom, we see a number of photographs on his wall of hot men in various stages of undress. With the preceding scene of Boston taking a photo of Nick after they fuck establishing some context, we can make some quick assumptions about who those men are to Boston and what was occurring prior to the photo being taken.

Even within two episodes of Only Friends the camera has almost served as an additional character, bringing us in to the private-public spaces we aren’t supposed to witness. In a conversation I was having with @waitmyturtles, she made the absolutely brilliant point: “the camera of the show is messing around with what we perceive as privacy”.

Sure Boston is making sexual advances on Top in the showers of a public locker room, but no one is supposed to know that, at least no one who could be actually, emotionally impacted by catching Top and Boston together. We see it, but we aren’t supposed to.

But I want to move beyond the show’s actual camera to briefly touch upon the other cameras we have seen alluded to on screen so far. Kudos to whoever it was on tumblr that took the screen shots of the hook up between Neo and Drake and pointed out the web camera that was sitting at the top of the computer monitor. Now, we have absolutely no idea if that is relevant at all to future plot lines, if the web cam was on, or if any part of that sexual encounter will come back to haunt Boston. But I think it is worth mentioning the very real and easy possibility that the web cam could have been recording the room (whether it actually was or not). In this way, Boston is playing with fire around what aspects of himself and his sexuality are captured on a screen.

When Boston and Nick hook up for the first time in the cellphone repair shop, Boston stops the make out session long enough to look around. No, not around, up. Up to the ceilings as if he is scanning the room for possible cameras. Again, we don’t know for sure if a) there are cameras there, b) if that is relevant at all to future plot lines or c) if that really was what Boston was doing. But either way, Nick catches on to Boston’s scanning of the room, and turns off the light so that they can’t be seen.

In both of these cases, whether the cameras exist, are on, recording, or saving any information is not fully the point. The point I am trying to make here is that there are constantly opportunities to have gay sex be captured, and whether or not it is comes down sometimes to shit dumb luck.

Conclusion

gif by @maxescheibechlinichacheli

I am so fascinated by Boston’s character, just thinking about the ways he does and does not fit in to the archetypes of a highly vulnerable tearoom participant: in his interest being in photography, capturing the images of queer men post-coitus, in the way he approaches Top at the urinal trying to entice him in to sex, in the ways he engages with and thinks of other people, and I am very much looking forward to seeing if this trend continues or diverges. For instance, will we see a drastically different side of Boston if we see more of how he interacts with professors in school considering that the one time that he was really quiet and reserved was during the presentation in front of the entire class? Will Boston fall in to the “public saint/private sinner” dynamic that would root him firmly in behaviors of a highly vulnerable queer man engaging in public sex? Or will he drift away from that alignment?

Disclaimer: I want to acknowledge that I am a Westerner and I am engaging and interpreting this show and the gay culture in this show through my own Western lens as well as the Western Gay Culture lens. However, I feel comfortable using these lenses to discuss, analyze, and identify threads of interest to follow throughout the show because:

In 1984, the ‘Boston Bar Study’ conducted by Men of All Colors Together Boston (MACTB) cited numerous examples of widespread discrimination at gay bars in Boston against black men. Similar types of discrimination have also been cited in Los Angeles and New York (Wat, 2002). Even more troubling is that this type of behavior seems to be international as well*anywhere that gay white men come into contact with gay men of color (Ridge, Hee & Minichiello, 1999). One can only imagine how many others never make it into the new stories. Rather than isolated events attributable to racist owners of single bars, the attempt to patrol the borders of whiteness in gay-owned business establishments seems to be a systematic practice (They Don’t Want to Cruise Your Type: Gay Men of Color and Racial Politics of Exclusion, Chong-suk Han, 2007).

In short, cruising, and discriminatory cruising practices are seen worldwide, and therefore I argue that gay culture in Thailand, while likely not identical, is similar enough to Western gay culture to apply similar frameworks, especially considering the aspects of gay culture Jojo and his co-creators have placed in their past works.

Sources

Ahlm, Jody (2017) Respectable promiscuity: Digital cruising in an era of queer liberalism, Sexualities, DOI: 10.1177/1363460716665783

Chong-suk Han (2007) They Don't Want To Cruise Your Type: Gay

Men of Color and the Racial Politics of Exclusion, Social Identities, 13:1, 51-67, DOI:

10.1080/13504630601163379

Humphreys, Laud (1970) Tearoom Trade.

Irvine, Janice M. (2022) Tearoom Trade: Tales of Public Sex, Marginal People in Deviant Places, https://www.jstor.org/stable/10.3998/mpub.11519906.11

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank @bengiyo, @lurkingshan, @neuroticbookworm, @so-much-yet-to-learn, @waitmyturtles for their thought partnership, edits, and suggestions!

#only friends #only friends the series #ofts #neo trai #jojo tichakorn #ninew pinya #boston #boston x nick #boston x top #neomark #forceneo #wka long post #kicking off the (possible- not guaranteed) WKA Academic Papers on Sex in Only Friends Essay series #only friends meta #only friends analysis #only friends the series meta #only friends the series analysis #ofts meta

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monarch-afterdark · 2 months

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Titan History: Godzilla

Welcome once again to Monarch: After Dark, the digital gateway between you and the organisation dedicated to understanding and navigating this troubled new world we live in.

For today's communication, it was decided by Monarch officials stationed at Castle Bravo (Outpost 54) that we should create an updated historical account on arguably the most recognisable and infamous of the Titans we currently know of; Godzilla.

(Pictured above: aerial footage of Godzilla leaving San Francisco the morning after G-Day, circa. 2014)

Monarch Database File: Godzilla

Monarch Designation: Titanus Gojira

Height: 393 feet

Weight: 99,634 tons

Length: 582 feet (tail)

Nature: Bio-Atomic

Behavioural Classification: Protector

---------------

A member of an ancient reptilian species that was known to exist as early as the Permian period, Godzilla serves as a guardian of the natural order, rising from the depths whenever the balance of the world is threatened, be it by other Titans or by humanity. Newfound information has revealed that, at some point in their early history, the Titanus Gojira species waged war against a population of great apes within the Hollow Earth. The outcome was victory for the former, while the latter migrated to a surface landmass that would become Skull Island, where they would face near-extinction.

Throught the millenia, imagery of these Titans showed their defense of humanity against other Titans, including the seemingly extraterrestrial lifeform, "Monster Zero". These battles were documented well, immortialised in the form of cave paintings and tales passed down through the generations.

(Pictured above: Cave painting documenting a battle between Godzilla and Monster Zero, circa. 1973)

While much of the history surrounding the individual we know today as Godzilla is unknown, his modern history is far clearer. First discovered in 1954 by founding Monarch figures William Randa, Keiko Muira and Leland Shaw, the initial reaction to the Titan's existence was an attempt to kill it using a nuclear weapon. Covered up as the Castle Bravo nuclear test, it was believed that Godzilla had been killed until he resurfaced a year later in Hateruma Island.

His next widely documented appearance was the infamous G-Day in 2014. Tracking down a mating pair of Titanus Jinshin-Mushi (aka MUTOs), Godzilla battled and eventually killed them in San Francisco, though not without extensive damage done to the city and the Golden Gate Bridge beforehand. Months later, he battled with a Jinshin-Mushi Prime, which resulted in the Prime destroying his dorsal plates before she, too, was killed.

According to Keiko Muira, and her grandchildren Cate and Kentaro Randa, who were recovered on Skull Island in 2017 through an "in-between" realm linking the surface to the Hollow Earth, Godzilla responded to a Gamma Radiation Simulator abandoned in the 1960's and battled a large dragon-like creature before they were able to escape. Their account is currently under Monarch investigation.

(Pictured above: Godzilla using an "intimidation display" in front of Monarch's Castle Bravo crew, circa. 2019)

In 2019, a mass Titan outbreak instigated by eco-terrorist Alan Jonah and Monarch paleobiologist Emma Russell called Godzilla to action once again. He first appeared in front of Castle Bravo, where he prepared to attack before the outpost lowered its weapons and calmed him down. He made way to Antarctica, where Monster Zero had recently been awakened. The two battled before the latter Titan retreated.

They clashed again off the coast of Isla de Mara, Mexico, where Godzilla succeeded in tearing off one of Monster Zero's heads. Before this battle could end, likely in Godzilla's favour, the military deployed an experimental superweapon called the Oxygen Destroyer, which severely weakened Godzilla and allowed Monster Zero to escape and regenerate its missing head before usurping control over Earth's Titans.

Their final battle took place in Boston following an evacuation of the city. Godzilla had support from an ally Titan known as Mothra to battle Monster Zero and its own ally, Rodan. The battle ravaged much of Boston, and culminated in Godzilla being dropped from the troposphere and Mothra being killed by a powerful blast from Monster Zero. With some assistance from Monarch and a final gift from Mothra, Godzilla achieved a heightened state of power and caused a thermonuclear explosion that destroyed Boston, and Monster Zero.

Following the battle, other Titans gathered around and bowed before Godzilla, accepting him as their new alpha. In the interim between this and the next major incident, Godzilla would travel the globe and keep other Titans, such as Scylla and Amhuluk, in check.

(Pictured above: Godzilla surrounded by other Titans, bowing down and accepting his claim as the alpha Titan, circa. 2019)

Following a period of minimal Titan activity, Godzilla suddenly surfaced in Pensacola, Florida and destroyed an Apex Cybernetics facility before returning to the depths. In response to this, a joint operation between Monarch and Apex went underway to use another Titan, Kong, to track down an energy source that would give humanity the edge over Godzilla before he could hurt more people.

Godzilla and Kong clashed twice. Their first battle took place in he Tasman Sea, where Godzilla intercepted a naval fleet transporting Kong to Antarctica. This encounter was short-lived, and only a last-ditch effort by ex-Monarch agent Nathan Lind prevented Kong from being killed. Their second brawl in Hong Kong placed Kong on better footing, armed with an axe he obtained within the Hollow Earth, though Godzilla still prevailed and nearly killed Kong.

However, deception from Apex allowed them to siphon the energy from the Hollow Earth into a secret anti-Titan weapon, Mechagodzilla. After losing control of the mecha, it went on a rampage and battled a weary Godzilla nearly to death before a resuscitated Kong intervened. Working together, the two Titans triumphed over Mechagodzilla and parted ways without further conflict.

(Pictured above: Godzilla departing Hong Kong following Mechagodzilla's defeat. To date, this is the last confirmed sighting of Godzilla, circa. 2024)

---------------

And there you go! A simplified but up-to-date account of Godzilla's modern history. We will upload more information regarding him as we are authorized to do so by Monarch officials. We hope you have learned something from this historical account, and we will be back shortly with new information.

Until next time,

Monarch: After Dark

#monarch #monarch after dark #godzilla #titanus gojira #kong #monster zero #monsterverse #godzilla 2014 #godzilla king of the monsters #godzilla vs kong #godzilla x kong the new empire

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wub-fur-radio · 7 months

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Appealing Sounds of Confusion & Dismay

Nothing is absolute; everything is possible. – Hassan-i-Sabbah

If you’ve been dismayed to be feeling even more confused than usual of late, Wub-Fur Internet Radio wants you to know you are not alone and wishes to do what we can to help. Toward that end we offer this two part streaming mix of appealing sounds from around the planet and across the multiverses of contemporary psychedelic/stoner/doom/space rock music. Featuring 25 new tunes from 25 of your favorite modern psych combos, including Frankie and the Witch Fingers, Black Sand, Sonic Moon, King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard, Queens of the Stone Age, Jeffrey Alexander + The Heavy Lidders, Druid Fluids, Dead Feathers, Dead Shaman, Pink Fairies, Gong, Goat, and 13 more bands who are dismayed but not afraid to be confused.

▶︎🎶 Listen on Mixcloud: Part One | Part Two

Running Times: Pt. 1: 1 hour, 14 seconds; Pt. 2: 59 minutes, 52 seconds

Tracklists

Part One

Repeat Transmission (0:55) — Brown Spirits | Coburg, Australia

Just an Illusion (4:29) — Black Sand | New Zealand

Flutter By (4:41) — Druid Fluids | Adelaide, Australia

Let It Out (3:47) — The Wans | Nashville, TN

Give It Time (3:54) — Sonic Moon | Aarhus, Denmark

Gardeners of the Earth (5:20) — White Canyon & The 5th Dimension | MG, Brazil

Gila Monster (4:36) — King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard | Melbourne, Australia

Mild Davis (4:46) — Frankie and the Witch Fingers | Los Angeles, CA

Negative Space (3:53) — Queens of the Stone Age | Palm Desert, CA

What It Is to Be Free (4:12) — Kind | Boston, MA

Counting Up and Down (3:18) — Jeffrey Alexander + The Heavy Lidders | Philadelphia, PA

Those Disruptors (5:25) — Modoki | Tokyo, Japan

La Storia Dell'Aviditia (4:30) — Futuropaco | Oakland, CA

Trying to Keep Control (6:29) — Dead Shaman | Switzerland

Part Two

Robbery (9:56) — Dead Feathers | Chicago, IL

Another Sailor Who Dies at Midnight (3:06) — Tangerine Stoned | Italy

Join the Resistance (5:35) — Goat | Norrbotten County, Sweden

Montezuma (4:49) — Edena Gardens | Copenhagen, Denmark

Hassan I Sahba (6:02) — Pink Fairies | London, UK

Tiny Galaxies (3:51) — Gong | UK

Something To Fall Back On (3:50) — The Wytches | UK

FTW (7:09) — LSD | Dublin, Ireland

In My Own Dream (8:19) — The Third Mind | Downey, CA

Your Confusion May Now Be Visible (4:50) — DWLVS | San Francisco, CA / Philadelphia, PA

Barely a Season (2:26) — Abronia | Portland, OR

All tracks released in 2023.

#psychedelic rock #neo-psychedelia #space rock #stoner rock #music mixes

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toasttt11 · 4 months

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maddox hughes

Maddox Theodore Hughes

Number: 22

Season: Fourth

Position: C

Height: 6”4

Hometown: Boston, Massachusetts

S/C: L

NHL: CHI

Prev Team: TBL

NHL

• Selected First overall by the Tampa Bay Lighting in the 2020 NHL Draft.

• Traded to the Chicago Blackhawks for the 2022-2023 season.

International

Team USA

•2022 World Championship- Forth - 7 G, 5 A, 6 GP

•2021 World Championship- Bronze Medal, 7 G, 6 A, 6 GP

•2021 World Junior Championship- Gold Medal, 11 G, 9 A, 7 GP

•2020 World Junior Championship- Forth, 5 G, 2 A, 5 GP

•2019 World Junior Championship- Fifth, 3 G, 2 A, 4 GP

•2018 World U-18 Hockey Challenge- Silver Medal, 7 G, 7 A, 7 GP

•2017 World U-17 Hockey Challenge- Gold Medal, 8 G, 7 A, 6 GP

Fourth Season (2023-2024)

Chicago Blackhawks

70 G, 60 A, 130 P, 80 GP

Signed a 64 million dollar contract for 7 years and three million dollar signing bonus.

Captain.

Third Season (2022-2023)

Chicago Blackhawks

62 G, 56 A, 118 P, 79 GP

Was traded to the Chicago Blackhawks during the off season.

Alternative Captain.

Second Season (2021-2022)

Tampa Bay lightning

58 G, 54 A, 112 P, 77 GP

Won a Stanley Cup.

Rookie Season (2020-2021)

Tampa Bay Lighting

54 G, 52 A, 106 P, 56 GP

Received the Rookie of the Year award.

Signed a Contract for 13.5 Million dollars for two years and a 1 million dollar signing bonus.

Won a Stanley cup.

Before NHL

• Played two seasons with the USNTDP.

• Totaled 260 points (100-160--260) in 125 games with the USNTDP, the most points and assists ever in USNTDP history.

• Scored 130 points (50-80--130) in 63 games in 2018-2019, played with the U-17 and U-18 Teams.

• Scored 110 points (71-48--118) in 62 games with the U18 team in 2019-2020.

Personal

• Born September 9, 2003

• Son of Jim and Ellen Hughes

• Has three siblings, Quinn, Jack, Luke.

#maddox hughes au #jack hughes x reader #trevor zegras #trevor zegras x reader #connor bedard x reader #nhl x reader #jack hughes #luke hughes #quinn hughes x reader #jh86 #quinn hughes #luke hughes x reader #chicago blackhawks #nick foligno #lukas reichel #jamie drysdale x reader

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nobrashfestivity · 2 years

Photo

Unknown, Female Ghost in the Moonlight. School of Katsushika Hokusai, Kaei era (1848-54) to Ansei era (1854-60). Courtesy Museum of Fine Arts, Boston

#unknown #ghosts #katsushika hokusai #japanese art

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fitzrove · 1 month

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Scientists discover first known English-language Crown Prince Rudolf fanfic (1881)

("A DISGUISED PRINCE". The Youth’s Companion (1827-1929), volume 54 (1881), page 14. (It's an American children's magazine). Boston: American Periodicals Series II. Public domain, digitised by Google, accessed through the Hathi Trust - link.)

#its me i'm scientists #kronprinz rudolf #fanfiction #XDDDDDD #history #this is so interesting though?? who came up with this... who in this boston magazine was a habsburg royalist but specifically for rudolf #who was like. 23 at this time

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heaveninawildflower · 1 year

Photo

‘Amalfi’ - Robe de Worth.

Illustration (September 1922) by George Barbier (French, 1882–1932) taken from ‘Gazette du Bon Ton.’

Lithograph with hand-applied color (pochoir).

Image and text information courtesy MFA Boston.

#1920's fashion #George Barbier #House of Worth #Amalfi #fashion plate

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cathygjohn · 27 days

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New episode of my podcast, Drawing a Dialogue! Ep 54, Teaching in a Comics MFA! Cathy shares all about her first year teaching in the Visual Narrative MFA program at Boston University. A good listen for current students or people considering it!

Episode art by remus.

#podcast #comics #comics mfa #mfa #higher ed #comics school

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liaromancewriter · 8 months

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Dolphins and Sharks

Premise: Max and Sienna paint the baby’s nursery, and an old rivalry resurfaces.

Book: Open Heart (post series) Pairing: Sienna Trinh x Max Valentine (M!OC) Rating/Category: Teen. Fluff. Words: 930

A/N: This fic was requested by @kyra75 for Maxenna: paint. Submission for @choicesprompts Flufftober, @choicesoctober prompt: 'Partner' and @choicesflashfics week 54, prompt 3

Sienna Valentine stood in the doorway of the smallest of the spare bedrooms and took in the bare white walls, dark hardwood floor and single window overlooking the alley below. It didn’t have the best views in the apartment, tucked away as it was in the corner down the hall, but it would do.

She suspected the original builders had probably envisioned the room as a den or home office. Before she moved in last year, Max had used the space as a library. Later, they converted the room into storage when her things from Boston arrived, as well as the boxes of keepsakes and paraphernalia she’d left with her parents in New Orleans.

The room’s location, close to the master bedroom suite, and size made it perfect for their Little Bean’s nursery. She couldn’t wait to bring her vision to life.

“Ready for our painting date?”

Sienna leaned back as Max slipped his arms around her from behind, resting her head against his shoulder. His hands covered hers, and they cradled their unborn child together.

“Definitely ready to put you to work,” Sienna teased, giggling when he pouted.

“Are you sure this is safe for you and the baby?” He nuzzled the side of her neck, and she shivered, her eyes closing as his hands drifted up to cup her breasts. “It’s not too late to hire someone.”

Sienna’s eyes snapped open, and she pushed herself out of his embrace, turning to face him with a fierce expression.

“Nice try, Rich Boy, but I want us to decorate our baby’s nursery, not some stranger,” she reasoned. “Besides, given the amount of time you spent researching non-toxic paints, I think we’re safe.”

He smiled wryly and shrugged his shoulders in resignation. “Okay, but don’t complain if the end result sucks.”

Sienna patted his cheek and grinned. “It’s cute how you believe that I will let you leave here unless the room is picture perfect. Just follow my lead.”

Max swooped in to capture her mouth in a searing kiss that had her insides melting.

“I love it when you take charge,” he murmured against her lips. “Can I persuade you to seduce me tonight?”

“Only if you’re good,” she quipped. “Now, let’s get to work.” She pointed at the plastic roll. “Step one. Cover the floor with a drop cloth.”

A couple of hours later, Sienna hummed along to a catchy tune drifting from the Bluetooth speaker. The playlist they’d chosen cycled through Top 40 pop, indie and rock songs and suited the mood.

She stepped back from the wall she’d half painted and glanced sideways to check on the progress with the accent wall. Her eyes narrowed in contemplation at the expert way Max handled the paintbrush roller.

“You’ve been holding out on me,” she accused when he turned around and caught her staring. “You’ve done this before.”

“Oops, you caught me,” he said glibly. “I’m a hotelier by day and house painter by night.”

“Max…” she sighed, not in the mood for jokes.

Her back was killing her, and her stomach had been growling for the last twenty minutes. She did not want to admit that Max was right about having her take it easy and letting him do all the work.

“Sorry!” he said sincerely.

He must have sensed she was out of sorts for a different reason, for he walked over and eased her into a chair. She was grateful when he didn’t say, I told you so and just tucked a shawl around her shoulders.

“Remember my friend, Doyle?” he asked, crouching so that they were at eye level.

“Of course. We went to his wedding in the summer.”

“Well, he used to flip houses once upon a time,” Max explained. “All of us got roped into helping whenever he needed free labor. Painting, hammering nails into two-by-fours, installing grout in bathroom. You name it, we did it.”

She regarded the walls he’d already painted, and her lips curved into a teasing smile. “Well, if the bottom ever falls out of the hotel industry, you’ve got a second career as a house painter.”

He burst into laughter. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

He rose from the floor and held out his hand. “Come on. Time for a break. You might be Superwoman, but all that hard labor’s made me hungry.”

The next day, Sienna and Max stood side by side, staring at the underwater-themed decals they’d just finished installing on the accent wall. Once the furniture arrived next week, the crib would go against this wall.

She sighed dreamily at the thought of their Little Bean guarded by a dolphin and a shark while he slept. She’d had her heart set on wallpaper originally, but her husband had been right. This was so much better. And they could easily change the decals as their son grew older.

“Go on, say it,” Max smirked, nudging her shoulder.

“… You were right,” Sienna grumbled, not wanting to admit defeat, but her smile gave her away.

She stretched on her toes and kissed the underside of his jaw. “Thank you for doing this for me.”

Max wrapped his arms around her shoulders and kissed the side of her head. “You’re welcome, but we’re hiring out for the next one.”

Sienna laughed, nestling into his side, and stared wistfully around the nursery. Their son would have the best of both of them, and that was everything she wanted.

As for the next one, she eyed Max shiftily. Well, she had plenty of time to change his mind.

Bonus

All Fics & Edits: @bluebelle08 @coffeeheartaddict2 @crazy-loca-blog @genevievemd @headoverheelsforramsey @lucy-268 @jamespotterthefirst @jerzwriter @lady-calypso @mainstreetreader @peonierose @potionsprefect @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @socalwriterbee @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction

Submissions: @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

Max & Sienna only: @aallotarenunelma @storyofmychoices @kyra75

#open heart #open heart choices #open heart fanfics #playchoices #open heart fanfiction #sienna trinh #sienna trinh x oc #choices fic writers creations #cfwc fics of the week #choices fanfics #choices fanfiction #sienna trinh x max valentine

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sparrowsfallingfromthesky · 1 month

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by the way this is terrible picture quality but this is what I ended up doing with my wall last week. I still have to stick everything down more securely and I might make a few adjustments but I'm pretty satisfied.

I even made a shitty gallery guide:

1. Pictures of me with the 4 core members of Darlingside 2. Picture of me with Aaron Tveit 3.-4. Carousel animal ornaments from the Smithsonian 5.-9. Photo collages with my college friends 10.-12. Drawings of Les Amis de l'ABC as pigeons by me 13. Portrait of Victor Hugo by Alphonse Legros (Harvard Art Museums) 14.-15. Winnie-the-Pooh pencil drawings by E.H. Shepard (Victoria & Albert Museum) 16. Isabella Stewart Gardner museum, photo by Clements & Howcroft 17. Etching from Carceri d'invenzione (Imaginary Prisons) by Giovanni Battista Piranesi (British Library) 18. Cantica de Medicina by Avicenna (Boston Medical Library/Center for the History of Medicine) 19. Vanitas Still Life by Herman Henstenburgh (Morgan Library & Museum) 20. Mystique by Amy Brown 21. Art by Ulla Thynell 22. Medea by William Wetmore Story (MFA Boston) 23. Rockets and Blue Lights (Close at Hand) to Warn Steamboats of Shoal Water by JMW Turner (Clark Art Institute/MFA Boston) 24. Twilight by George Inness (Williams College Museum of Art) 25. Path to Shambhala by Nicholas Roerich (Nicholas Roerich Museum) 26. Star of the Hero by Nicholas Roerich 27. Palden Lhamo by Nicholas Roerich 28. First Touch (redraw of a still from Pride and Prejudice (2005)) by Kalogh on redbubble 29.-43. Art by @ullathynell (bought from artist's website, but she also has society6) 44. A Thousand Cranes (left screen) by Kayama Matazo (National Museum of Modern Art Tokyo) 45. Art of northern flicker by Sarah Martinez 46. Bird art by me 47. Cover design for Bury the Lede by Dora Lariat by me 48. "ex libris" book plates from my college English department 49. Ship with seven men, net and gull by Alfred Wallis (Kettle's Yard, Cambridge) 50. Farewell by @riisinaakka-draws 51. Piece of eight necklace 52. "Know no shame" inscription from Black Sails 53. Book of adventures by dandingeroz on redbubble 54. Farewell and Good Riddance to Skeleton Island by riisinaakka 55. The Walrus at Night by riisinaakka 56. The map from Treasure Island 57. Hush by @finngualart (SaskiaDeKorte) 58. Returned to the Sea by SaskiaDeKorte 59. Flint coloring page by SaskiaDeKorte, colored by me 60. Madi by riisinaakka 61. Longing by riisinaakka 62. Watercolour raven by SaskiaDeKorte

And (doll tw) here's a "before" shot from a while back (I'd changed the curtain and taken down the mirror in between)

#and in case you were wondering yes doing this decoration and making this guide and making this post were all forms of procrastination #in fact I'm going to put this in the tags for the fics I'm supposed to be working on #because if I'm documenting my writing process then I should also show what I do instead of writing. lol #placeholder tag #btsinktt blogging

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tearsinthemist · 3 months

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4-day workweek gets boost from UK study

What happened? "The four-day workweek is proving to be the gift that keeps on giving," NPR News said Wednesday. In a new study of 61 British companies that began a six-month trial of the four-day workweek in 2022, 54 companies are still using the truncated schedule and 31 have made it permanent.

Who said what? The study, from the think tank Autonomy, shows the benefits of a four-day week are "real and long-lasting," and "in some cases have even continued to improve," said Boston College sociologist and project researcher Juliet Schor. "Physical and mental health and work-life balance are significantly better than at six months. Burnout and life satisfaction improvements held steady."

The commentary "Companies also reap the benefits of reduced work hours" through increased productivity and big savings from decreased burnout and absenteeism, Victoria Wells said at the Financial Post. Unlike "mindfulness training, meditation apps and even on-site yoga," shorter workweeks actually improve employee wellness.

What next? "Dramatic shifts in the pandemic-era workplace" turned the "once unfathomable" dream of a four-day workweek into reality for some workers, Elizabeth Bennett said at BBC, now generative artificial intelligence could "accelerate the adoption."

[email protected]

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lixiehugs · 11 months

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dohee profile

tw : mentions of bullying

BASICS !!

stage name : dohee (hangul: 도희) birth name : wang dohee (hangul: 왕도희) english name : dina wang nicknames : dodo, do, doidoi, doi, hee, doing

birth date : october 8th, 2002 zodiac : libra birthplace : seoul, south korea hometown : boston, usa

ethnicity : korean nationality : south korean languages : korean (100% — native), english (90% — fluent), mandarin chinese (15% — beginner)

PHYSICAL !!

height : 178 cm or 5'10 weight : 54 kg or 118 lbs blood type : b

eye color : brown natural hair : brown, wavy

body modifications : 10 piercings, 2 tattoos face claim : wekimeki lua vocal claim : aespa karina/nmixx sullyoon rap claim : aespa karina

CAREER !!

agencies : hybe labels (2017 - present) training period(s) : 2017 - 2019 group(s) : tomorrow x together subunit(s) : n/a positions : maknae

individual fandom : dodos (after the bird and the similarities to her name) representative emoji : 🦤 (dodo because it is one of her nicknames) social media : @/www.dohee.com on instagram and @/txt_members on twitter

best known for : being the female member of txt. being an autistic kpop idol. her mental health//disabilities representation. her ALWAYS being on beat when dancing. fantastic freestyle dance. being an ace.

PERSONAL !!

mbti : intj-t

positive traits : bubbly. very fun and nice. silly. very loyal. very organised. absolutely adorable. very honest. quite serious but can understand some jokes/sarcasm. funny just by existing. independent (most of the time). very genuine and puts her soul into everything she does.

negative traits : gets attached easily. no concept of time (which causes her to overwork herself). gets angry quite easily but tries to hide it. masks her emotions a lot. has difficulty with change and new environments (to do with autism).

habits : hand flapping. light stomping when excited. rocking. other tics. imitating sounds/words she hears. dinosaur hands. vocal and physical stimming. tapping things. smacking things. stabbing her nails into her palm when stressed. can’t hold eye contact for longer than a few seconds. needing to touch new things and either rubbing it because it feels nice or visibly recoiling. blinking deeply/repetitively.

hobbies : listening to music. dancing! gaming. reading + writing. producing music. painting. crocheting. doing anything to do with art. going shopping. doing everyone’s hair + makeup. going to the gym (sometimes).

BACKSTORY !!

wang dohee was born on october 8th, 2002 to a korean mother and korean father. her mother, wang rina (born 1973) is a volunteer worker for homeless shelters around seoul. her father, wang eungyeol (born 1970) is a software engineer currently working in seoul, south korea.

dohee was born in seoul, south korea as the first child in her family. the pregnancy was very rough for her mother, so despite wanting to have more children, dohee remained an only child. only having one child to focus on, dohee became very close with her parents. she considered them her best friends all throughout her school years and was always happy to come home to them at the end of the day. when dohee had to move out to become a trainee, she was very homesick and missed her parents so much even though she would still see them every weekend and they were not even an hour away.

when dohee was two years old, her family moved to boston, usa. they lived there until dohee turned eleven, as her parents were worried about her deteriorating korean skills. dohee excelled at her korean secondary school, being especially good at the sciences and maths, her arts grades were also superb. dohee graduated two years early, skipping both her sixth and ninth grade years. dohee had trouble making friends and experienced some bullying in secondary school due to many issues. because of this, her parents wanted her to explore some of her interests outside of school, thus leading to her joining a local dance crew in january 2014.

FACTS !!

dohee became a trainee in august of 2017.

she used to be able to speak better english than korean but since moving back, that has changed.

her parents can speak english well, but dohee is better.

after moving back to korea, dohee struggled to make friends and had some bullying issues. so, her parents wanted her to explore her interests outside of school, thus allowing her to join a local dance crew in january 2014.

this dance crew entered lots of competitions where dohee could compete in group routines and as a soloist. this also gave her the chance to try out many different styles of dance.

at one of their competitions in july 2017, dohee was scouted by a bighit employee for her hiphop solo.

her favorite styles of dance are hiphop and modern.

dohee is also quite flexible, but she rarely shows off her skills.

dohee is ambidextrous.

she is musically gifted/a musical genius; having perfect pitch, the ability to sight read, and being able to play many different instruments.

her best instrument is piano, but she is getting better at the flute.

dohee was diagnosed with autism and ocd when she was four years old after her parents grew concerned about some behavioral patterns.

she does not have any medication for her autism. she has a medication for her ocd which she takes daily.

due to her neurodivergence, dohee has a near photographic memory. she can remember almost any song she’s ever heard, even if it’s for the first time, she can remember any face or name of any person she’s ever met, she is also great with naming movies and tv shows based off of theme songs, casts, quotes, screenshots, etc.

because of her dance background and partly because of her autism, dohee has an insane ability of always being on time while dancing/singing. if a song starts randomly in the middle, she can pick up the choreography and lyrics instantly.

her reaction time is also wild!! (like that one video of yeonjun dancing immediately after song starts)

also due to her autism, dohee is a very fast talker. it is natural for her; she’s been like this since she was learning how to talk.

with this ability, she was able to become a very skilled rapper.

her favorite colors are pink and blue.

she loves playing minecraft!!!

she also loves story and puzzle-type games.

dohee is a cat person.

her favorite kpop artists are hyunA, seventeen, red velvet, taeyeon, mamamoo, and nct 127.

her favorite western artists are sabrina carpenter, lana del rey, madison beer, selena gomez, and cavetown.

her favorite movie is the lion king.

dohee is a huge nerd.

she loves the harry potter books.

her favorite season is winter.

she loves playing in the snow!!

dohee is very in-touch with her inner child.

dohee has had an emotional support cat since 2013. she has a somali/fox cat. her name is kyongi!

dohee also has an official service dog which she takes everywhere with her. she has a black labrador called chanho.

dohee crochets!!!

she’s also really gay!!!

the boys have said that when dohee sleeps she makes this grumbling sound. she only does it when she moves in her sleep. the boys have many videos of her doing this.

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sunshineblondiewrites · 6 months

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The First of Us - Chapter 4

14 vs 54

Joel Miller x f!reader (no use of y/n)

Series summary: you and your father meet Joel and Tommy 6 years after outbreak day. You join their group trying to make it to the Boston QZ not realizing all that joining would entail. You eventually make it to the QZ but not without suffering many losses. Tommy decides to join the Fireflies and you and Joel are left with your smuggling partner, Tess, when years later you meet a teenage girl that will bring you and Joel across the country, and maybe together.

Summary: Years of being in the QZ has worn you out and with Tommy not contacting in weeks Joel is itching to get out as well. Your team's plan in place seems unbreakable until a deal goes bad and a 14 year old girl appears.

Warnings: death, outbreak day, friends to lovers, reader has a sister, minor physical descriptions of reader, grieving, FFM threeway (does not include reader, cannon typical violence, (if I miss any please lmk)

a/n: Hello, hello hello, SO SORRY this took ages!! This has been written for forever I just like to stay one chapter ahead of posting anddd I got very busy very fast, BUT thankfully due to thanksgiving break I've caught up a bit. We're finally in TV show cannon! WOO! As always thank you so much for reading, it genuinely means so much to me and brings me so much joy!

ps: lmk if you spot the very depressing easter egg in the beginning of this chapter, blink and you'll miss it! (hint: involves one of the bodies in a truck)

word count 4.2k

Ch3 Masterlist

Boston QZ, present day, 2023

You readjusted your face covering and wiped sweat from your brow with the peek of exposed skin between your glove and your dark purple linen button up. You had paired it with a black tank top underneath and some worn jeans as always. Today’s task was body burning. FEDRA had taken on more bodies than usual because of the bombings going on and therefore reviving this job in your schedule for the first time in about a month, which was pretty good all things considered. Less bodies equaled less death. There were quite a lot of bodies to burn today, and of course the FEDRA officers watching you all expected the bodies to be burned by the time the work hours ended. It wasn’t a completely unattainable goal, but it did require zero breaks and speed. Typical.

Most of the corpses you could haul into the fire by yourself, but still often needed help with the larger corpses. Joel was here, but since you and Joel were hardly ever on the same service, you had never partnered together before. It was usually you and a woman named Mary. You knew literally nothing about her except for her name and that she had a dead husband and son. You didn’t know how they died, you never asked, and honestly the two of you had had maybe 10 real conversations, but you still considered her a friend.

You grabbed what looked to be the body of a teenage girl out of the back of the truck bed–the last one for this truck. She had a bag over her head but a large braid still stuck through the bottom of it and from the looks of it she’d been bitten. You chucked her body into the fire and was met with the overwhelming stench that was burning flesh, hair, rubber from shoes, and clothes combined with the sickeningly sweet smell of cooking meat. It made you want to gag thinking about how it reminded you of a Kentucky cookout back home.

As you walked over to the next truck you noticed Mary staring at the bodies with Joel walking next to her.

“I can’t,” Mary said. Wordlessly Joel reached into the truck and turned with a small child in his arms. It had been months since a child that small had been in one of these trucks. While you made your way over to the truck you watched him carry the poor kid over to the pit and toss them into the fire. When he turned away from the pit he made eye contact with you and you paused for a second trying to push back the thoughts of how that kid was no bigger than…

“THERE A PROBLEM?” an officer shouted. Of course you stop for less than ten seconds and ta da Officer Matthews over here has a problem with it.

“Nope,” you said to Matthews who had come around to the side of the truck you were at.

“Then get back to work,” he snarled. You grabbed another body and threw it over your shoulder, this one a woman who looked to be only skin and bones, and began your march over to the pit. Joel passed you, locking eyes with you as he went by, silently asking if you were fine. To which you nodded shortly.

After you’d thrown in all the bodies you had maybe 20 minutes to sift through the ashes and keep the burning pile active and so that you could begin to shovel them away. Eventually the buzzer sounded at 4:00 to end the day and you and Joel met up at the line to receive your cards for the day’s work.

“You got anything else?” Joel asked.

“Not today. Tomorrow, we got street sweeping, or sewer maintenance” the soldier responded.

“Which one pays more?”

“That would be the one with the shit,” the soldier responded sarcastically. Joel nodded. “Late crew, 4pm start,” he stamped Joel’s paper and Joel moved aside so that you could get your cards.

“I’ll do a double on the street cleaning tomorrow,” you said.

“Ah the pretty lady doesn’t like the shit huh?”

“No, I just know I can get more at other places.” It was true, some men liked to tip you a card or two or more while you “worked the streets” and if you could get a double shift in, it would be even better.

“Early and midday crew, 6am start.” You took the stamped paper from him and left with Joel to the QZ’s town square where an execution was taking place.

“... violation of EMC 342.3, unauthorized exit from a Quarantine Zone, Maria Elisiano, violation of EMC 342.7, unauthorized entry into a Quarantine Zone. Each of you have been tried in a military court of justice and each of you having been found guilty by the court martial panel and with a sentence of death by execution…" You felt Joel’s eye’s leave Boston’s gallows and you followed his gaze to the side wall where Lee, a FEDRA soldier, stood and nodded at him before slipping away.

“I’ll be right back, wait here,” Joel said.

“Yes sir,” you said, saluting unenthusiastically. He shot you a glare before following Lee into the back alleyway. You turned back just as the ground beneath the death rowers disappeared and the collective sound of three snapping necks filled your ears and you grimaced. You couldn’t be more grateful you’d convinced Tommy and Joel to just walk through the front door those 7 years ago or those three may have ended up being you.

Tommy hadn’t radioed in two weeks. Joel mentioned it casually that he hadn’t responded in a few days last week but now it was really beginning to worry him. You started going with him to the radio station, if you could even call it that, as moral support for your friend or maybe just because you, too, were worried. It wasn’t like Tommy to not respond for so long.

You looked around the crowd of people and spotted Jake, who you still hadn’t managed to completely cut ties with. You’d been making up excuses for months now of why you couldn’t have sex with him. Headache, you’re on your period, smuggling run, stomach ache, late shift, whatever you could come up with. And besides, you’d noticed him flirting with some chick named Rebecca last week so he’s got a new pretty doll anyway.

*snap*

Another woman’s neck wringed, who you looked up to see was actually Rebecca, so Jake wasn’t completely off your hands now. You eavesdropped on the whispers of the people beside you and heard that she was a Firefly and was hanged for treason not just violation of whatever law like the officer said. This was FEDRA’s new tactic. Whenever they captured a Firefly they would come up with some violation other than treason to try to show that they weren’t scared of them and that they had no value. So they were being hanged with only their fellow Fireflies knowing. Another senseless FEDRA plan.

Is this what happened to Tommy in another QZ? You wondered. He was smarter than that, you hoped anyway.

Tess was supposed to be securing your battery today. You were finally taking steps to get out of here and find Tommy. Joel is a lot of things, but when it comes to his family, patient is not one of them. You heard children’s laughter behind you and noticed two boys and a girl chasing each other around, completely oblivious to the fact people are being killed 30 feet in front of them. It was sad the way the world had ended up. You had so much life ahead of you back then, but now, you were a 34 year old with no family, hardly any friends, and honestly, the apocalypse was lonely.

Now, you were a young, headstrong woman and you’d had your fair share of female teenage fans who looked up to you, but they only met a cold shoulder. You didn’t want them to end up like you, and if that meant FEDRA academy so be it. It was better than what you had. Never having to worry about food or a place to sleep, getting an education. A shitty one you’re sure, but still an education. It hurt to push them away–you had always loved kids, but it was for their own good.

You couldn’t say that you completely regret going into the QZ. It gave you a sense of security, Tess–despite her obvious love for Joel–had become a mentor for you. You thought back to a night not long after Tommy left you had rolled over to see in the moonlight that Joel was still wide awake, staring at the ceiling with his hands linked across his chest. Maybe it was your sleepy state that made you do it, but you reached out and slipped your hand into his and squeezed. He looked at you quizzically but all you did was give him a soft smile and closed your eyes to go back to sleep. In the morning, your fingers were still interlaced.

You were startled out of your thoughts and back to reality by Joel.

“Hey,” he said, grumpy as always.

“Hey, is everything set?”

“Yeah, he said stay off the streets the next couple nights, guys are jumpy.”

“Makes sense, we done?” you asked.

“No,” Joel said gruffly, “one more stop.” He then turned in the direction of the radio station and started walking.

“Joel,” you said slowly and he turned around, “you’ve been there everyday. You can’t keep trading cards and whatnot to get stuff for this guy. He didn’t answer yesterday, or the day before that. It’s almost 5:15, we need to get back.”

“He could answer today,” Joel said and turned to start walking again. You kicked a rock on the ground in his direction and begrudgingly followed after him.

—

You hated the radio station. Hallways filled with people writing notes to family members, some of them crying softly, some giving looks of panic, all of them just quietly depressed. It was things like this that made you glad you didn’t have family out there to call, but now there was Tommy.

Joel, as usual, walks past everyone in the line to the front. There’s a man in there talking to the Radio man, Greg–something about a new baby. Sometimes you forget people still get pregnant in the apocalypse. You’d been lucky, Jake knew how to pull out and you weren’t dumb and tracked your cycle.

Joel sat down across from Greg and tossed him a few cigarettes. Greg took one and lit it before shaking his head at Joel.

“Nothing?” Joel asks, “Is there any chance it's coming in at night? You're asleep and you miss it?”

“When I'm sleeping, Gabriela listens or my son, the smart one, not the other one, God bless him. If Tommy responded we'd know.” You watched as Joel tried to sort through options in his head.

“And you're talking to the tower?”

“Every day. They gave him your message. They haven't seen or heard from him since and that's it. It hasn't been that long.” Greg was right, as things go at the station it really hadn’t been that long. It wasn’t like before where you could just leave a voicemail and get back to them later when you or they weren’t busy. And if Tommy had to move again then maybe he hadn’t found a station there yet.

“It's been three weeks. It's never taken him more than a day to respond.”

“I'm sure he's okay.” Wrong move Greg, wrong move.

Joel pulls out a map you hadn’t realized he brought to work with him today. “Show me where the tower is,” he said firmly.

“Joel…” you piped in.

“You can't be serious.” Oh he is very fucking serious., “Joel it's in Wyoming. All this open country? You guys are capable people, but there are worse things than infected out there. I hear everything on this. There are raiders, there are slavers…” Wrong move again, Greg.

“But you're 'sure' Tommy is okay?” Joel says sarcastically. And you look at him again and you see a broken man, who just wants to know if after all this his brother is still alive.

“It's... it's the Cody Tower,” he circles a spot on the map, defeated. “Q-Bar 4, but I don't know exactly where…” Joel gets up to leave, and you follow him with your eyes out the door before turning back to Greg.

“Thanks,” you say quickly.

Greg nods at you with a flick of his cigarette and goes back to his smoking while shouting, “NEXT!”

—

It was a wordless walk back to the apartment. As soon as you entered, Joel made his way to the floorboards where you kept your supplies and then made his way to the table to spread out all his maps to go over routes with his pencil. You grabbed an old bottle of whiskey and two glasses, filling them and giving one to Joel and sitting at the table with him.

He starts to sip his whiskey and you sit in silence for a bit before speaking up, “So we’re really doing this?” You asked cautiously.

Joel grunted in reply before responding, “We were always doing this.”

“We were always going west, this is fucking Wyoming.”

Joel paused his cartography session to look at you in confusion, “Yeah? Wyoming is west, what the hell did you think it was going to be?” Joel countered defensively.

“We live in fucking Boston, everything is fucking west of here. I was imaging something more like Iowa or Illinois or some shit. Everyone knows how stingy the Chicago QZ is,” you shot back at him. Did he actually think the three of you would be able to make it across the country?

Joel scoffs and pops a few pills and downs the rest of his whiskey, slamming it onto the table. “I’m taking a nap,” he grumbles, “you should too. You didn’t sleep well,” he adds walking away from the table.

As he walks you turn in the chair to look at him, “what makes you think I didn’t sleep well?”

Flopping onto the bed he says, “you were yawning a lot today on shift and I heard you toss and turn all night.”

“I wasn’t yawning,” you argue but he just grunts from the bed. You roll your eyes and start looking at the maps. On paper it doesn’t look that far, but you know how deceiving that is. You finish off the last of your whiskey and get up from the chair to stretch and pop your body. Joel was right, the body of your twenties wasn’t around anymore. You were still a fit and muscular woman, but nothing stops age. Sitting on the couch you grab an old beaten up book from the shelf and try to read it, but succumb to sleep by the second page. At some point in the night Tess comes in and gets in bed with Joel but you don’t look up. It’s dark outside now and sleep is calling you in again.

—

You wake up to Tess making coffee in the kitchen, and apparently so did Joel because you walk into the kitchen at the same time. Joel sits at the table and Tess sits next to him. Since Tess only has two hands, you don’t have a mug of morning drug and you move to the counter to grab one.

You take your cup to the table when you notice Tess’s face was swollen and bruised with a black eye.

“What the fuck happened to your face?!” you rush towards her and Joel looks up, with a slimmer of worry in his stoic features, reaching for her face to get a closer look.

“I got jumped by a couple guys,” she says indifferently.

“What guys?” you and Joel demand in unison.

“Just a couple teenagers. Said some shit I probably shouldn’t have.”

Joel stands up quickly, ready to fight, and you begin to grab a fresh towel to clean her up.

Tess grabs his hand and pulls him back to sit down, “no no, I’m fine,” she says, “come on. You know these guys were born after the outbreak. Never learned how to argue. They just start swinging. Fucking 19-year-old pieces of shit.” You ignore her and begin dabbing at her wounds with what was left of the whiskey from the night before.

“It’s a miracle you’re alive,” Joel huffs.

“It’s a miracle any of us are alive,” she retorts.

“These aren’t new…” Joel says, annoyed, examining her face.

“No. I was in FEDRA lockup all day,” you and Joel look at each other but before you could say anything, she adds, “Anyway it doesn't matter. I need you both to take a breath.”

“What?” Joel questions.

“Joel…” Tess says slowly.

“What?” you say back to her, this time leaning against the back of Joel’s chair and crossing your arms.

“The guys who jumped me were with Robert. He sold our battery to someone else. Nothing's lost. Shit like this is gonna happen. Now we just shake it off, and we go get our cards back or the battery.”

“That little piece of small dick shit!” you shout.

“I need that battery Tess,” Joel gets up aggressively, almost knocking his chair over.“The truck's no good without one and if I don't get to Tommy soon, he's gonna die out there!”

“Well fuck it, we get our battery and the money back,” Tess suggests, “Joel, listen. Robert is terrified of you. So, you march out of here all Clint Eastwood, especially with Miss Hot Stuff with you, he's going to get wind of it and skip. I need you to take a breath,” Tess stands up in front of him.

“Who’d he sell it to?” Joel asks.

“Don’t know,” Tess says.

“Well where is he?” you ask now.

“Don't know...yet. But we're gonna find out quietly. Understand?” Joel nods curtly, “Now I promised Robert that you wouldn't hurt him. But I would very much like for you to hurt him.”

You laugh from the table and take a swig of the whiskey, “you and me both sister.”

“So let's go hunt that motherfucker down and get our battery and our truck. And then we'll go find Tommy. Alright?”

You and Joel both nod and grab the supplies out of the floorboards. Your timeline may have been set back, but that wasn’t going to stop you. Guess you won't be making it to your street crew shifts today.

—

Joel stood behind where you and Tess were talking with Dave, one of Robert’s “men.” Dave may be on Robert’s “payroll”, but it isn’t enough to buy his loyalty. Especially when it involved you in a low cut black tank top.

The conversation didn’t last long. As you and Tess get up from the table and walk towards Joel as another man scurries away from him. You raise your eyebrow at him and he rolls his eyes shortly, nodding towards the white Fireflies symbol being painted over on a wall not too far down.

“Well, I mean, it cost us a couple of cards, but we got him. He’s supposedly taking the battery to a red-tagged building. But get this, the corner of Stillman and Cross,” Tess said.

“The one Miguel used to use?” Joel says confusingly.

“Yeah, I’m thinking so,” Tess agrees.

“I mean, couldn’t we take the subway tunnel under Haymarket and get into the building from below?” you ask.

“Take Robert by surprise…” Tess wonders aloud.

“Pay this fucker back,” Joel agrees.

“Then let's do this.”

—

Joel uses a set of large bolt cutters and snaps the rusting chain keeping the building closed off. You and Tess each have your guns and flashlights out already, wrists crossed.

“Ready?” Tess asks. You and Joel nod. You walk until you come across a door with a U and a dot painted above it. “This is it.”

You walk into an old office looking type room. This must have been some type of office building before the outbreak. Suddenly Tess lets out a yelp, causing you and Joel to whirl around, guns up. Tess shines her flashlight on the wall revealing a dead infected, glued to the wall by cordyceps, frozen by its own flesh.

“Shit,” you say under your breath.

“This one’s done,” Joel says, lowering his gun.

“Yeah, I know,” Tess huffs, “just wasn’t expecting it.”

“You never do,” you say slowly, taking in the magnitude of the horrendously beautiful display of nature on the wall. The poor victim forever trapped in a scream. You’d learned over the years how deadly cordyceps was, but you couldn’t help but have a horrified admiration for what it creates. The fungal flowers that sprout from the infected heads are a display of nature’s beauty surrounded by danger and death.

“Let's keep moving,” Joel says to you, bringing you out of your daze and directing you forward. He, like you, took a last look at the infected and then followed behind you to a ladder Tess had begun climbing.

“It’s like they reframed the whole structure,” Joel starts and you’re already smiling and rolling your eyes, the infectious wall art quickly leaving your mind, “Probably in the ‘80s.. Everyone was cutting down on apartment sizes to sell more condos.”

“Oh,” you laugh, “and this has been…”

“Construction Corner with Joel Miller,” Tess finishes for you. “Construction Corner” had become a running joke between the two of you that Joel just absolutely adored and showed so by completely ignoring you and Tess’s comments.

“How far up are we going,” he says begrudgingly.

“Uh, this far,” Tess says hopping off the ladder, “this door opens into the hallway and… the fuck? They put a piano in front of this thing?” Tess frustratingly tries to pry the door open.

“You smell that?” Joel asks.

“Gunpowder,” you say looking around until your eyes find something trickling out from the cracks in the door, “guys…”

“Blood,” Tess breathes and brings up her gun. You and Tess push the door open together and a body falls, it’s Robert, along with several other bodies around him. Tess spots the battery and bends down to inspect it.

“Well, the battery’s no good. And he still tried to sell it,” Tess shines her light on Robert’s face, “Twice.”

“That greedy fuck,” you say. You hear groaning around a corner in the hallway and Joel goes around the corner gun in position. He creeps fully around the corner and after a few steps you hear a door fly open and SLAM.

“Joel?” you hear from a faintly recognizable voice.

“Marlene?” you hear Joel say. Here we fucking go. There’s some more conversation going on between two parties as you and Tess round the corner as well.

“So this is who Robert screwed us over with? The Che Guevara of Boston? I mean, war must be going pretty shitty for you to be buying from scumbags like him.” You could almost kiss Tess. You hated Marlene. For multiple reasons. The obvious one being that she convinced Tommy to leave, and the second being that she and her little rebel gang made everything harder. For smuggling, for working, for fucking existing. Her people were everywhere, bombing, attacking, causing disruptions. It was ridiculous and they could hardly be considered rebels at this point–just nuisances.

“Yeah. It kind of has been. The merch was bad and he obviously didn’t take “fuck off” for an answer,” Marlene responds.

“Give me my knife,” your attention is brought to some kid on the ground. She looks 12.

“What do you need a car battery for?” Joel says. The girl is wearing a white shirt with burgundy sleeves and worn jeans, with her brown hair pulled back into a ponytail, and looking with big, brown eyes from her knife to Joel and back and forth. She makes a move to grab the knife causing Joel to point his gun at her resulting in a reaction from Marlene and some other woman. Kat? Kit? Kim? Something with a K.

“Don’t,” the woman says, causing you to tear your eyes away from the girl and to the two beaten up women down the hall from you.

“Not at her. Point it at me,” Marlene says. Joel looks back at the kid and raises his eyebrows at her before moving his gun back to Marlene, you and Tess follow suit. It’d be a pretty unbalanced fight, 3 vs 2 injured.

“And to answer your question, I need it for a better reason than you do. No offense, but Tommy’s just one man,” Marlene says, “ It’s our business to know things.”

Joel laughs, “To know things? You’re the cause of it. You turned my own brother against me.”

Suddenly… the assistant? speaks up again, “That was a lot of gunfire. FEDRA’s gonna be on the way.”

“I know,” Marlene says quickly, “We were gonna move Ellie out of the zone tonight. But we won’t make it anywhere like this. Not for a while anyway. So now I’m thinking… you’re gonna do it.”

What the fuck?

tags: @orcasoul @who-has-my-green-banana

thank you for reading and wanting to be tagged :) 🩷

#the last of us #the last of us hbo #tlou #tlou hbo #tlou fanfiction #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller reader insert #joel tlou #tommy miller #tess the last of us #pedro pascal characters #ellie the last of us

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