#BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW ITD BE LIKE THIS. GOD

[bangcakes]

.

#so like is the rest of my life just gonna be Yearning from now on NZNXNXJXNXMX #ok maybe not the rest of it. but the forseeable future. god how do ppl do this. how have ppl BEEN doing this. #ignorance is truly bliss like. i talk to my friends about him n they dont like fully understand bc theyve never liked someone so mucg #its just so embarassing to talk about n i just BDNDJDJNDJD #i just !!!! always imagined myself single. and would Say Stuff about not wanting anything like that but now im a big clown JDJDJDJJDDJ #BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW ITD BE LIKE THIS. GOD #im also like. trying to talk myself out of it. like oh maybe its all in my head JDJDJDJDJDN #but like just too much has happened. idk. im just........ im feeling impatient 😭😭😭😭 #but like. its progressed well so far with me just progressing things when they feel Right. hhhhh god #and like things wouldnt have progressed this far without him liking me at least a little???? #idk !!!!!!!!!!!! this stuff is so hard. and like i cant even see him now without making plans hhhhhhhhhhh #it was so much easier before we graduated NDJDJDJDJDMMFMD #ah well..... soon i guess. soon #itd be really nice tho if he like asked me out. but i have a feeling that maybe im not being obvious to him?? maybe i gotta spell it out idk #he also said (in ref to a job offer tho) that he wouldnt take it unless it was for sure #and i have a feeling......... that maybe hes not sure ????????? god idk #rip to my simple life. guess i gotta wait til i see him again hhhhhhh #personal

[arsenicflame]

hi i'm really interested in space lesbians! where are they, who are they? how can i see them? (shows, games, books?) also what are you most excited about in s2 of ofmd?

OH BOY OH BOY OH BOY

soooooo my space lesbian enthusiasm refers to 3 separate medias!! (it used to say gay space vikings bc that was an even more specific niche buuuut im way more into tihylttw these days s o) one day i am going to make a fuckin venn diagram of my girls because they all have so many similarities. (loki/sigyn and angela/sera are basically the same characters change my mind.)

this is about to get real long bc im unhinged about them <3 10/10 would talk about them all day if the communities were there

our first space lesbians are loki + sigyn from the bifrost incident! TBI is an album by the band the mechanisms which you can find wherever you listen to music (youtube here) its a norse mythology inspired rock/steampunk-esque album and it is SO GOOD- it takes place on a train in SPACE in the format of an incident investigation. its a story so you have to listen to the tracks in order :)

--

next up! this is how you lose the time war- our lesbians in this are called red + blue because we have deconstructed this trope to its most basic format at this point :') its a short book, and you may be familiar with it as it went viral from a trigun fan tweet a few months back. (my url (and sewing blog url) are actually references to a quote from this book!) you can get it wherever you get books and id recc the audiobook if youre into that i am also in possession of the pdf if you wantto try before you buy.

tihylttw is a story told through the exchange of letters between two agents on opposite sides of a war- it usually gets described as enemies to lovers but id personally use rivals as i think it describes them better. the book is known for being incredibly poetic and sometimes pretentious in its writing and i just think its the most beautiful thing ever. lesbians do it better

honestly theres nothing i could say for tihylttw better than it could say for itself, i just adore the universe theyve built and i want to KNOW MORE. i love you and i love you and i want to find out what that means together

--

saving the best for last is my girls angela + sera. the most of all time. nobody compares to them for me. they consume me

angela + sera are from marvel comics and you can find my complete reading list here, but if im talking about them positively, im usually talking about one of the titular Angela comics, and more often than not queen of hel.

honestly i love the angela comics so much that im making myself speechless trying to figure out where to start. Angela falls into the asgard side of marvel comics, though she is a lot more fluid in her affiliations, her whole thing being that she deals in deals- nothing for nothing everything has its price. she is at times described as emotionless and is generally quite a stoic character, especially around strangers. the major exception to this is her wife, sera. seras one of marvels few canon trans characters and i think she is just so wonderfully written. shes witty and cheeky and doesnt take shit from anyone, even when it gets her into trouble- and oh boy does sera find herself in some predicaments! the angela comics are often just as poetic as tihylttw for me, theyll drop an 'as long as you are with me, i am not afraid' and ill need to go smother myself in a pillow for a sec. in QOH they adopt a daughter who is Also a lesbian, shes an alternate version of leah of hel and i ALSO adore her.

im desperately trying to avoid plot points but god. the main arc is 21 issues of smooching Shakespearean space angels what more could you want?

(through sera & angela we get a lot of heven lore and honestly that could be its whole own thing for me im SO fascinated.)

my girls are currently in comic hell, i am praying they will get something good soon 🙏🙏

--

and what am i most excited about for season 2? can i just say izzy? can i just say anne + mary? dude im so ready for some lesbians you have no idea actually you probably have a very good idea if you made it this far down. im incredibly excited to be seeing izzy get a favourable arc this season, im really hoping to see him develop relationships with everyone else, see him grapple with feelings around ed (actually im really hoping he chooses not to forgive ed. for growth) im excited to see whats gonna go down with his leg, im excited to see wtf is going on w ed + stede because i have no idea what the continuity is at the moment, im just excited!!!!!! i honestly dont think theres anything im not excited about everything looks so good so far

#category 10 nyx autism moment #i wrote way more for the others than TBI but its not bc i like it less theres just. a lot less lore? #honestly we dont know much about loki/sigyn outside the incident on the train #and talking about that is just. tellin u the story #the angela section just turned into stream of consciousness im sorry i was tryin to avoid just. esplaining the plots ghfnjfnj #if u read angela and u like it please talk to me g o d i am full of thoughts about them #i was trying to be restrained here but but but #god sera sera i love her shes no damsel in distress shes in control of her own destiny!!! #angelas conviction on things!!! itd be easier to argue with a mountain!!!! #i want to know EVERYTHING i want to scream about everything god #[explodes] #i need to lie down now actually im insane about them #if the angela fandom was half as big as ofmd i would probably never consume a new piece of media again #instead i mentally debate myself as to whether the lines about the scent of battle/blood in her eyes are supposed to be read as a #trans women are real women commentary or a rebuttal of hevens misandrist tendencies (i like both) #(its fun to try and read into this i love sera i love how they handled her being trans i love heven lore i love the anchorites #[explodes harder] #ok stopping. to reiterate. category 10 nyx autism moment #nyxtalks #ask #i am so. so sorry

[sieglinde-freud]

the engage dlc is good cuz it makes punchdreo viable

#fe pandreo #ann gets engaged #he wouldve gotten the kill anyways too he just needed to be a little extra #ive straight up never seen the high priest punch crit animation this shit is so funny #in MOST instances itd be a better idea to just use his tome bc 2 range but its like #god this is so much more fun #this actual map can die tho theres so many goddamn wyverns i dont actually know how im supposed to get through them all but #lol!!

[toastsnaffler]

istg one of these days.......

#ya know that post thats like texting lesbians: its throw bowling balls down the stairs day u better be game #one of my fave posts ever in the world #anyway my lesbian flatmate texts like the straight female friend part of that post and i love her but its killing me #its endearing but its so hard not to read it as flirty stoppitttt im already dedicating so much work to repressing this little crush 😭 #ALSO THAT POST THATS LIKE FLIRTING W GIRLS WILL HAVE U ADDING :3 TO UR TEXTS literally so true but I dont think she means it like that 😭😭 #like she talks to everyone that way I remember when I first met her me + my ex spent ages trying to work out if she was gay #bc we were so sure she had a gay vibe but every text felt like it was pointing the other way..... the vindication when I found out she WAS #anyway my resolve weakens with every 😘 emoji like im already thinking abt it dont give me any more ideas !!!! #its not even embarrassing anymore like how am i supposed to exist near someone like her WITHOUT ever having a gay thought #so im not sorry if she sees this. i take rejection like a champ dont be shy #but genuinely tho i dont think shes interested shes just cute like that. and idw make things weird cuz we're still living together next yr #itd be suchh a pain if i made things awkward right when we need to find a place. and anyway my best case is our 3rd flatmates WORST #i wouldnt do that to him god forbid #buuuut...... nope ok enough of that im going back to bed its almost 1am #this is what HAPPENS when u have insomnia tuning into the crazy radio every night #need to get onto dating apps and find smth new to distract me before this gets out of hand....... buttttt i dont want to >:| #its ok my patience is infinite i like playing the long game. i was into my ex for 2 and a half years before i made any moves #i can wait this one out too either itll happen eventually or itll pass. we're good #ok thats GOODNIGHT from me if u read this far wow ur nosy arent u...... jk ily sleep well everyone #muah all round #.diaries

[perenlop]

back to the jn grind bc im kinda anxious to get done with it already. i never thought these things would come to bug me so much

#i feel weird being like ‘’ugh ppl are being stupid in the baby show’’ but man ash is being really dumb in this baby show rn #like ash youve had multiple episodes abt spiritomb #you know what it is #i think itd be better if goh or chloe were the ones getting possessed in this episode bc that makes more sense #i think thats what makes these scenes feel distracting in jn. they gave audience standin characters thatd work better here #actually im letting the ep play as i type and this ones actually kinda annoying. im gonna skip to the allister scenes and get on with it #echoed voice #jn lb #actually thats another issue w jn. i feel obnoxious as fuck saying this bc im trying to be conscious #that im an adult watching a kids show. and thats ok. but man jn feels like its aimed at an even younger audience #something abt it feels so dumbed down in a way the other arcs arent #like it wants to be as safe and palatable as possible. idek how bc its not like i love how meanspirited the early seasons were #but there’s something missing in jn. it feels a lot dumber #like ‘’hey you guys are on a GHOST TRAIN. youre gonna see GHOSTS HERE’’ #goh: ‘’uhhhhh. hehe did they say ghooooosts? idk. i guess not?’’ ash: ‘’i dunno! probably not!’’ #both later: ‘’whoaaaaa whats happening?? what are these strange events????? are we…… HAUNTED????!?!?!??!?111???’’ #this is on par w team rockets base being common knowledge and the characters are like ‘’uhhhhhh ha ha wheres team rocket’’ in grookeys ep #also god gohs pokedex wont shut the fuck up in this episode #ash with a haunted face. goh: ‘’uhhhhhhhh is he haunted? ash why are you acting weird?????? *takes him ten minutes to see hes haunted* #like i thought goh was supposed to be the smart one. whys he so stupid here

[hecksupremechips]

Idk how to even talk to anyone anymore when it’s just the same thing in a loop over and over

#i cant tell anyone anything or ask for help cuz lets see what happens #i get hit with a generic ‘just keep going keep looking for jobs keep going’ #or i get *too honest* and then ive completely drained someone of life cuz thats really all im capable of doing anymore it seems #like it seems all i do is go on some sorta monologue about how miserable i am which is pointless cuz its not like anyone will do anything #and its just stressing people out too cuz its like lol if youre helpless and have to listen to me bitch over and over to you #its either annoying as hell to hear or its guilt inducing and we cant have that now can we #and im quite frankly tired of all these options like lol the very few people i actually like and enjoy are just fuckin #nothing anymore cuz im ruining their lives and being an awful friend #its really great how youre supposed to confide in people when youre feeling like shit but then doing so ruins everything #lol what am i supposed to do now you know? i cant talk about anything except myself and my misery #and its a never ending cycle cuz im still here in this unsafe environment and im just so fucking sick #of people telling me to just keep going and keep looking for jobs cuz god bitch thats what ive been doing #and i have nothing yet and lets say i get a job tomorrow its probably gonna pay like shit #and im too incompetent to work 40 hours so if i wanna like ease myself slightly itd take even longer to have money #and its just gonna take forever to save money enough to leave and god I need out like right now #because im just gonna go insane and im gonna kill myself if im here any longer every second im here breathing #feels like im being strangled im becoming a monster too and the worst friend of all time and terribly selfish and whiny #lol i guess ive just got this dumb fantasy where ill be saved by someone who treats me nice and they take me away #and i dont have to wait or lift a damn finger i can just. be safe. and get a hug and not fear my life #im so lazy and worthless and horrible I really do just deserve to die #but i guess i cant say that. cuz then itll make everyone too drained lol

[b0mblover]

low doesnt mean 0

By: J

Cw; denouncing (the christian one specifically) god.

Religion (its entirely about me and my mothers fights about religion)

Probablt dont read this if you’re religious, or do, your life.

your proof of a god- starts and ends at my birth- and his death

“your chances were so low they mightve well have been 0” “its near impossible that you were born perfectly healthy” -except i wasnt, it was 14% chance, not 0% there was still a chance- if theres a ball to gamble, then theres always going to be some kind out outcome, no matter the unlikelyness of it all.

“What do i have to do to prove to you that theres a god”

change the past, change the past, 

“you have no proof that hes not real”

if “he” were, why can i not see? why did that happen? why is life the way it is?

“If he isnt real then how did XXXX happen?”

because. there was the physical possibility, just as everything else, there was the possibility to become whatever i call myself at this point in time, there was the possibility to meet the people in my life, there was the possibility to be happy. My so called “luck” has nothing to do with it, your so called “god” has nothing to do with it, to be harsh, however, “everyone is unique” sure, lets go with that, youd say the exact same line with any other people- as long as they were vagely good people, even if they werent, you said it still then. “The you dont value them” i love them, no matter what? of course i don’t believe that they’re replaceable, ive already learned, however, theres no such thing as “the perfect friend group” for anyone, sure, some can be much better or worse, but as you said “everyone is unique” so, if theyre all different, you cant compare then to each other- theyre separate people, with completely different lives, you, as an outsider in my life, have no say of whos better in my life or not. 

If your so called “god” is real, then why is this low-end still manipulating me? -次

(funny thing, i wrote so many more tags than whats showing up- apparently theres a tag limit!)

#A little treat for the people who scroll through my blog since im not linking this to anywhere #yes i put j/次 in twice. its because how i format. this was supposed to be a drabble in my notes app. sometimes i just need to have it wrote #that i wrote it. to feel real or whatever #fun ish fact! there was a low % of me being born. and my mother loooves using that as a “god is real” argument. #literally ignoring what a % means. like maybe id vagely believe you if it was 0 but it wasnt?? #sho if your some how reading this #Hi #and sen whos probably reading this? #Hi bae #god theres so much shit on my mother that i could just expose #yk might make a thing on that. itd be funny #(chill she ruined my entire and i mean literally my entire life. i couldnt give a damn about her feelings. she deserves it) #why do my fingers smell like caramel atm?????? #ive just been laying in bed??? we dont even have caramel???? #god i love ranting in the tags #did you guys know that im veeeery gay and have a crush on [redacted]? #yk what might aswell post my life update in the tags #Tw! my entire life #basically i have a crush on one if my friends. which is already painful enough for me bc my mother teases me about if i do and i keep sayin #that i dont bc i didnt. and i do now so i cant let that slip. anyways. theyve been showing up in my dreams more and more. literally this #and its kinda embarrassing? bc i really hate being in love (ik shock to someone probably) its bothered me allll of my life #and usually id just yk ~confess~ and get the feeling to go away over time #but it isnt going away and no way in hell am i telling them bc yk. were friends. and i sure as hell dont wanna ruin that or make them #uncomfy. so whenever i talk to them i feel all weird bc yk. i dont wanna fuck up and flirt with them or smth (even more annoying bc i #normally flirt with my friends even if i dont like them romantically) so i just dk what to say to them. bc i obviously wanna talk to them #but i get a pit in my stomach. weve talked for months idk why i feel like this now #plus idk how to get rid of the feeling. someone just bash my head in already please. #[redacted] im so sorry. for everything (shut up with the “you did nothing wrong” idc if i did or not) (scratch that. it goes for everyone) #the urge to post my main on this is consuming me but i wont bc… well uh 🧍 ~things~ #J’s misc shit

[goththembo]

Can someone send me a large sum of money so that i dont have to work again please please please please please

#i hate every job i have after long enough #we’re understaffed so im doing an insane amount of overtime my boss keeps adding more to my plate #I literally dont get paid enough to live im doing like 3 jobs at once it takes me over an hour just to get here i cannot afford an apartment #i dont know how to say no #i dont know how to get another job bc honestly i think itd be worse a lot of other places i go #and it also took me 8 months to get a job #and it was only bc my previous one was doing another seasonal stint which has now turned into a long term job and i feel like im going crazy #i dont know how to ask for anything i just want to be able to live #a whole 11 months has gone by in a blur bc ive been employed i feel god awful #every attempt i make to better myself i have to go into survival mode because Something has happened with work #im a fucking assistant manager dude what am I supposed to fucking do

[rottingsick]

I'm tired of everything I do always bringing me immense pain

#text #rotting #no rb #mine #I'm stuck I'm stuck I'm stuck and I don't know how to get out #god I just want to be happy #I'm literally bein handed the knife and instead of puttin it down like a sane person I find every which way to fuckin stab myself #and then cry and wail because it hurts #honestly I'm not sure if this sacrifice shit is goin so well here I don't know how much more I can fuckin take #my safe heaven first of all isn't that safe on its own #like I think I was over romantizin the idea of it because it was literally anythin than what I was in at the time #like I'm here. and I forgot that here has it's own set of problems. I'm sure at least a moderate portion could be fixed with a hanful of #effort but I dont know if itd be worth it for the one fact of dear lord I am strugglin to eat here. I literally do not know how to eat here #and that's not easy to accomodate for #this is of course ignorin the glarin big big issue of why I. even when in the other place still. automatically said no its not an option #the next thing is. I fuckin carried the knife with me and still won't put it down like a sane person and am torturin myself #day in and day out with no fuckin escape around #ultimately I think it's for the best that I stay at the other place #but god was this supposed to be a break and I'm just fuckin torturin myself everyday #I kind of just wanna tell myself. do nothin. just do fuckin nothin. #recover you piece of shit that is fuckin doin smth by doin nothin #and I'm still just grippin tightly to the knife as if I'll die if I let go of it #I need to stop my god but I don't know how to make myself stop #I just need a better game plan and life than this #I need to figure out something because right now I have no clue #but right now I need rest. but I can't rest until I've figured it out. I hate myself #stab stab stab I guess #I don't know if I can make it through

[niftukkun]

New from RECAP Weekly!!! An Exclusive Interview from Hermitopia's Emperor?!?

for the third week of @shepscapades ’s hermitcraft character design event, i offer grian as an empires smp member!

ok so first off, that head. thats just p03 from inscryption. but grian. it fits! but also! go play inscryption go go its on sale Right Now (until june 30) go play it its so good then go watch this video afterwards join my fandom please please please join us

ok back to hermpires! so i originally was gonna take an empire from s2 and just insert grian into it, but while browsing through the esmp s2 wiki i came across/remembered hermitopia and my brain went yep! this one. so i thought a bit about what grian would do if he was an empires smp member and how hermitopia would happen, and i think grian would crash the economy on purpose. i mean it almost already happened when the hermitpires crossover happened so i dont think im too far off. i think grian originally exported something simple, like maybe sugarcanes or mud, something easy to farm yknow, but then i dunno got bored or something so he made a couple more farms. then kept making more farms. then the hermitopia we all know and love happened!

actually maybe hermitopia isnt grians first empire. i think grian has a separate empire but decided to invite his friends to help him make some farms and then it just kept going. then hermitopia happened. i like the collaboration aspect of hermitopia so i think thats how that happens. hermitopia isnt necessarily grian's but its under his command so it gets called his. (isnt there a word for this? was it vassalage? i think its vassalage)

with that in mind i went with a robot-y grian because grumbot and a snazzy cool suit because business man (sidenote im looking over my pre art notes and one of them is just capitalism man and. yeah! not wrong). i gave him more steampunk-y wings than the usual feathery ones cause that fit better. i gave him a crown not really sure why but it fits since without it the design was more Just A Guy but with it he's more Emperor yknow. the buttons have a g on it because he would and an (attempted) gold trim cause that looked nice and fancy. originally he was gonna have four wings cause fun fact four wings is part of my base grian design but four wings kind of crowded the drawing so i didnt include them (sad) and i also didnt include the tail hes supposed to have because i couldnt find a good way to add it in with the pose. but in my heart he has both four wings and a tail

now why magazine style artwork? i 'unno. i thought itd look cool. and it does!! it looks SO cool!!! im so proud of it. recap magazine!! because of course im gonna make a hermitcraft recap reference are you kidding me recap is practically already a magazine reporting what gossip is happening on the hermitcraft server on any given week. its very specifically volume 9 issue 34 because thats when the crossover happened season 9 week 34 babey we love little esoteric details hell yeah!! i looked up how magazine covers work and its supposed to be like, main article big and smaller supporting side articles just kinda floating around so i did that!! and i made them funney references because of course i did! local bard catches scurvy because you cannot convince me that oli orionsound would not catch scurvy he would. does god is gay is a reference to that does bruno mars is gay nonsense article that makes me laugh everytime specifically in reference about mr smallish bean because he. has so many children. and none of them as far as i know from the lady server members theyre all lovechilds from gay lovers its hysterical and hilarious. quit your job join our sun cult is about the dawn empire because thatse the vibe that empire gives me and i think its funny. also!! thats hermitopia!! in the background!! i got the image off of the empires smp wiki and just Biggen'd it and it makes a bomb ass background hell yeah ^-^!!

also version with no text here lookit it!!

#gamble the queue #reblog #art #my art #digital art #artists on tumblr #drawing #fan art #fanart #hermitcraft #grian hermitcraft #hermitcraft recap #empires smp #hermitcraft empires crossover #fake magazine cover #shepshermitdesign23

[thatdeadaquarius]

Theres a lot of cuss words in this one so be warned lol

Bro i just had this-- insane fucking idea when i saw your "flowery words" post and i just-- omg I just had to shareee

So reader right? Very blunt, straight to the point sentences that dont dance around the bushes for 6 hours trying to tell you "oh no your house is on fire" or something, yeah? Well-- what if it turns the OPPOSITE when they start to SWEAR--

Because like-- i know myself. Me and like, so many people i know speak like that (blunt and straight to the point) but like-- when i get even MILDLY inconvenienced, i will start swearing like i have a masters degree in cursing out you and your entire flippity flappity bloodline

So id imagine the contrast to be like--

Reader, chill: aether, we're supposed to be going that way, this is literally the wrong direction

Reader, stubbing their toe: oW FUCK SHIT TITS-- WHY HAVE THE GODS FORSAKEN ME SO-- I CAME OUT HERE, TO THIS POINT, TO THIS PLACE, HOPING AGAINST ALL HOPE AND DESPITE SIGNS AND PORTENDS SUGGESTING OTHERWISE THAT I MIGHT, SOMEHOW, FIND MYSELF HAVING A PLEASANT EXPERIENCE, AND YET, HERE I STAND, ALONE AGAINST THE WORLD, FEELING ASSAULTED, ATTACKED ON ALL FRONTS, NOT KNOWING MY ENEMY'S NAME NOR HIS FACE NOR WHETHER OUR BATTLE IS DONE--

(Yes this is the "i came out here to have a good time and im honestly feeling so attacked rn" post)

I can just imagjne the sHEER WHIPLASH-- like, this dude has been speaking in the "divine tongue" or whatever and then suddenly theyre immediately reverted to their "lowly mortal jargon" or something-- AHAHA

Or like-- if it just turns into a reeeeeally long string of curse words, everyone would probably be so scandalized or something lolllll

YES YESS PSPSPSPSPSPSSS COME TO ME ASKS, COME TO MY INBOX COME ! !

Anyway, with our sponsor's message out of the way,

Bless you for this 🙏 my pets are fed, my crops are watered, my skin is clear

✨️This is gorgeous, just a gorgeous idea ✨️

I LIVE for Teyvat being scandalized maidens from the Victorian era, gOD BLESS ITD BE WONDERFUL

Like our modern music?? Absolutely would give heart attacks, not even the most stoic of them would escape the blush

Esp with cussing pretty please i wish i could see the looks on their faces, they'd also probably blush at how creative it can get lmao

(daresay, maybe even impressed?)

oh the whiplash, its be so funny, every time. No one can keep up with you, you've got Teyvat linguists stumbling, the older beings cant understand you sometimes, the newer ones only understand you SOME of the time, and apparently most often? Only when you're cursing??

(I think various characters would find an ancient deity only deigning to speak their lang. when they gotta cuss smth out the funniest shit ever, like Venti, Itto, Cyno?, Diona, Hu Tao, Kaeya, maybe Kazuha, Lisa, Nahida probably would get a giggle, Rosaria, Heizou, Childe, Tighnari might like, be trying desperately to hold back a laugh but it's not working, Scaramouche/Wanderer, Xingqiu, Yae Miko would def commission a light novel for this, and Yelan - im so sorry i listed who exactly, this is so long ill stop, i just thought someone would like to see it 😭😭)

(I CAME OUT HERE TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AND IM HONESTLY FEELING SO ATTACKED RN LMAO U MADE IT SO LONG AND FLUFFY THAT WAS PERFECT)

THANK YOU!! FOR THE ASK!! WHAT A LOVELY TIME!! COME BACK AGAIN!! WHENEVER!! :DD!!

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

#my asks #ask box open #please send asks #everyone #i would love to hear ur rambles or essays abt this topic #pls share with the class #genshin sagau ideas #genshin imagines #genshin impact #sagau #gender neutral reader

[bitwynn]

so i was talking with my friend abt like-- genshin lore and it got to the subject of forbidden knowledge and stuff

and she used this analogy of it being a computer virus or a corrupted file that cant be processed properly

which then made me think "ahaha yes SAGAU IDEA--"

so what if... the forbidden knowledge was the fact that the world is a game/simulation? and since the world of genshin is a computer program, it wasnt built to handle the realization of the nature of its existence and like-- processed it as eleazar, and "forbidden knowledge" and its other effects on the world

eleazar is the system like-- turning it into the safest thing the program can handle and leaving it to the gods (rukk and desh) to try and fully put a stop to it like anti-virus-- the program is only running the world, not the beings and people in it, so itd make sense for them to stop it since when the world is ending and you can do something about it, youd probably do something about it--

since rukk and desh were gods and therefore much "closer" to the games code/programming (closer in the sense that they were much more directly tied/connected to it-- esp rukkha because of irminsul), they were able to handle the realization in a sense-- like... they knew that they werent "real" in some sense and knew that this knowledge is slowly killing them and their deaths to the knowledge that "they werent real" is inevitable and that-- in a way, the eleazar is one of the safest ways for people to handle the knowledge-- that even the world is protecting them from the ruin of it

i imagine the way the two gods processed the information was like-- thru the "corruptive qualities of forbidden knowledge" and in fragmented parts. its why i said that they only knew that they werent "real" and not that they knew that theyre a video game world-- kind of in the same vein of practically every harbinger going "the sky is fake let me tell you about it" (proceeds to not tell you about it) (dottore i love you but im still mad about it)

but if the "forbidden knowledge" is knowledge about how youre not real because youre a video game and youre not supposed to be self aware of it, how then can the harbingers handle that information without going mad or constantly dying of eleazar? i mean-- in the both the manga and in the game its pretty explicitly said that like, dottore fully stopped colleis eleazar and practically cured her of it.

so... you know how they manage to keep altered information in the form of stories in scaramouches archon quest? i think a similar case happened here-- an allegorical story about people living in a fake reality, be it a dream or a story or something, was made to preserve this information. and since it wasnt the pure unadulterated truth about the nature of this worlds existence anymore, the program could handle it and keep anyone from reading it suffering the negative effects of forbidden knowledge

pierro probably did it tbh-- in the archon quest, it was said that the events of khaenriah and the events leading to the deaths of king deshret and rukkhadevata are similar, if not exactly the same.

so how can we then tie this into SAGAU? are you still with me? did you completely forget that this is about me bullshitting the games lore so much to fit this really specific genre of genshin fandom stuff so you can make content about it? have you forgotten i write SAGAU fics? ...honestly i cant blame you for that last one if you did, i havent been writing SAGAU fic in a WHILE LMAO

ANYWAYS--

the concept of "forbidden knowledge" being used in SAGAU is really interesting which is why im writing abt it in the first place lmao-- and the concept is uber fun so this is just me helping you fit this into your own fics and fanworks

since the "forbidden knowledge" is literally just like "youre a computer program and youre not supposed to know that", y/n would DEFINITELY be able to handle it without the adverse effects. and i know that y/n is basically the equivalent of a mary sue at this point and it physically hurted me when i started writing y/n fics but-- if you think abt it, it makes sense

i am trying so hard rn to like-- not turn this into a discussion about mary sues-- just watch OSPs video on the subject and youre golden lmao

it makes sense for y/n to be able to handle it because number one: y/n is literally us. y/n is not lines of code in a program. y/n is never supposed to end up inside a program or software, and is DEFINITELY SUPER AWARE OF THE FACT THAT GENSHIN IS NOT REAL.

y/n is a human, or at least was a human before they got isekaied or whatever plot thing you decide to do to put y/n in the genshi world. y/n is human, not programming and can definitely handle the thought of "youre not real, youre a game". (lmao it could also really make for some good introspection and/or angst moments where they could philosophize about themselves now that theyre in the game, and the nature of pataphysics and all that fun stuff lmao)

i feel like-- you could also use this as like, a sort of leverage thing? to prove that you are who you say you are and, if this is impostor au, you could use it to your advantage as well in more aggressive ways-- not just as a "prove that youre the one above us all" situation but as a sort of self defence thing-- like when scara and dottore were both talking about the sky being fake thing

obviously youd be immune to eleazar and the madness of the forbidden knowledge caps and the other adverse effects-- BUT you could also inflict those things to the people and the world around you. while other characters like the fatui and the gods could say "youre fake, the world isnt real", they wont inflict the bad stuff since its like they heard the info from a friend of a friend of a friend-- the knowledge has been filtered and purified and fragmented so much that it wont do anything-- its not the full unadulterated truth

but when y/n says it, thats when it inflicts the adverse effects. its the difference between knowing something happened because you were there when it happened and witnessed it, and knowing something happened because you heard it happen from a friend who found out thru the internet. y/n fully knows the truth and intricacies of that statement on so many different levels than the characters can comprehend which is why they can do that.

i feel like it could depend with the volume and amount of people that heard-- like, if you scream it and a whole crowd hears you, the ones closest to you suffer the worst cases of eleazar ever recorded or EVEN DIE, and the severity just decreases the further it gets away from you. itd also be an instant withering zone or become something like the mud from the chasm

i also wanna say that you can "control" the spread in a way but like-- i dont see a way of making that happen tbh. if youre reading this and are getting inspo, go wild babes-- i believe in you, but i personally dont believe that y/n can control it. using the "computer virus" analogy, youd probably have to go into the essence of Teyvat itself to "delete that information" similarly to irminsul but different in the sense of like-- irminsul only put it in the recycle bin but youre going in the recycle bin, selecting all instances and deleting it. maybe you can bullshit it via leylines and abyss mage drops since they carry around leyline branches but i personally think that you just spew out forbidden knowledge, and have to go to irminsul itself to delete it

but yeah! thats my thoughs on Forbidden Knowledge in SAGAU and how it could fit into the world of the AU! making this actually like-- inspired me a bit to write again lmao-- theres just like, so many cool ass concepts in genshin that i dont see in this AU (probably because i havent been there in a while ;vjklldxfg) and i really hope you guys get inspired too :))

#but yeah lmao this is literally just me bullshitting lore so much to make it fit into-- at this point a whole ass genre of gensh content #if my friend sees this-- high probability of it happening btw-- hey man-- #am i sorry that i turned our lore talk into genshin au bullshit?... nahhhhh #im just here to have fun and live my life lmao #and if that means desecrating lore to suit my own worldbuilding purposes? then so be it AHAHAHAH #but yeah!! it really like-- made we wanna deep dive into the lore again #both to use in fandom stuff and to just know #my thirst for knowledge will never be quenched ;CJKSDL;jVN #genshin impact #genshin #sagau #genshin sagau #genshin impact sagau #nic talks #genshin impact self aware #genshin self aware #genshin au

[ghostthecryptid]

Anyways,

I think itd be funny if Sniper took the other mercs camping. Just because of all the different mercs personalities and how they would react to camping.

Like Sniper I would assume is fine with camping

But I think Soldier would go fucking feral. Like full on "This is how real soldiers live during war!" or some bullshit like that. Mans would rub dirt on his face and everything. Demo is following him because "why the hell not". Just besties being besties i suppose

and could you imagine Sniper teaching Scout how to whittle wood? Scout would not move or talk for at least an hour.

Pyro would be making the biggest fucking bonfire ever with Engie, Medic, and Heavy helping (because their allowed to have fun too)

Spy is god knows where

And the night ends with them all around this bonfire having a good talk and laugh. Cracking jokes and letting loose.

#Please add on to this #And not totally not basing Scout over the fact that I did that myself #tf2 #team fortress 2 #scout tf2 #tf2 scout #sniper tf2 #pyro tf2 #tf2 sniper #tf2 pyro #spy tf2 #engineer tf2 #medic tf2 #soldier tf2 #demoman tf2 #heavy tf2 #tf2 spy #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 demoman #tf2 heavy #tf2 soldier #tf2 hcs #tf2 headcanons

[historia-vitae-magistras]

Matt accidently scaring the shit out of Gil is so fucking funny. Love how Arthur looks at Matt and sees a little malnourished soping wet kitten left outside in a storm and everyone else sees some ghoulish, brutally stone-cold being 💀. Arthurs the 'it dont bite' to Gils 'GET YOUR DOG!!'. When Gil is over what do their normal breakfast table conversations even look like? It seems like itd be a little awkward.

To be fair, that version of Matt is the one he got when Matt finally stopped shooting at anything speaking English. Sad cold baby. I feel like this is something to try and avoid as best they can. Who wants to watch their parent/mentor make googly-eyes across the table 😂. Matt just like "😬 sorry about that time I slit your throat and drowned you in a trench crater. Or the time I rolled a grenade under your latrine. Or the surrendering prisoners of war— yeah, I'm just going to go— love you dad, bye!" as he grabs some toast and runs for a train to Glasgow as Arthur tells him not to forget an umbrella and his jacket because good god, Alasdair is going to think this is so funny.

Gilbert just dumping booze into coffee all 👀. "Katya would like him."

Arthur tries not to look proud or amused.

"It's nothing we didn't do to each other!"

"In the dark ages."

"Blame the Normans. He's a sweet boy! Breakfast?"

"I'm good with Müsli and you, sir, are delusional."

They don't bring up Ludwig 😂. Nations aren't supposed to fuck each other up so much! You never know who you might need as an ally 200 years down the road! Matt kind of forgot that bit. Father's favourite combat knife got off his leash and everyone forgets he's not the novelty butter knife Alfred advertises!

#the ask box || probis pateo #Arthur || stone set in the silver sea #Gilbert || from this baltic cannonball #Gilbert and Arthur || heart of iron and heart of oak #Arthur and the children || bilge rat and his bouncing baby bilge rats #Matthew || my country is winter

[sugar-omi]

Can we know some Baxter thoughts on the scenario with MC leaving Cove and Baxter and MC eloping after the split? I'm invested

bro i think we're all mentally connected bc i just mention is this post that i forgot to add some stuff abt how baxter acts. tysm for sending this and omg i find it so funny everyone's so invested in this little story!! i never knew itd end up like this lmaooo

tags : Angst, (emotional) cheating, y'all live in delulu land, multiple choice dialogue, your moms distance themselves/disown you

[read "leaving cove for baxter" here]

synopsis : how does baxter act when you leave cove for him?

baxter feels so bad...

honestly he doesn't understand why you're doing this, he's so confused

he's happy that you still love him

but he see's how great of a man cove is and it kills him more than anything

he begs you not to do this

"y/n please! be rational!" baxter's fingers dig into his palms. he's trying to keep calm, but he's heard the best and worst news of his life.

you sit across from him, hands in your lap and crying. "i am. i... i love cove, and he's amazing. but you are everything i want."

baxter gapes, watching you cry with wide eyes. "i tried to forget about you, but I just can't.. I love you. I love you so much more than him!" you sob, hands covering your face.

baxter's hands are shaking.

he's happy to hear that you love him but you're engaged.

you're supposed to be married soon, all that's left is to pick out your outfits and the dance lessons and now...

baxter swallows. "and you've... thought about it?"

you nod.

baxter sighs, rubbing his sweaty palms on his dress pants. "...okay."

baxter is waiting for you that night when you break it off.

and when you walk through his door, with tears in your eyes he wraps his arms around you as you cry and tell him about how it went.

cove was distraught, to say the least. and after much crying and "why"'s, cove stopped crying and was just mad...

a quiet man's scorn is a scary thing..

"get out." cove doesn't look at you, he can't. if he does he'll actually combust and explode.

you gape, "..what?"

cove looks at you, suddenly enraged by your oblivion. "I said get out!" cove stands up, hands fisted at his side. you didn't believe he'd hit you or harm you in anyway, but you've very rarely seen him angry.

"why are you sitting there looking dumb? you just said you love someone else! our fucking WEDDING planner at that!" cove yells. "what? did you wanna stay and play happy family with me while you fuck him!?"

cove laughs humorlessly. "I can't believe you... don't you wanna be with him? you should just leave." what cove says next shakes you.

"or maybe you want to fuck him in our bed, in our home!" cove is crying again, frustrated and angry.

you start crying, "no! i-" you don't know what you're trying to say, if anything at all and your sobs cut you off.

"then leave, get your shit and leave!"

cove storms to your bedroom as you cry. when you finally get enough strength in your legs again you go upstairs to see him roughly packing your things into the bags and suitcases.

you shake, starting to grab some of your other things and packing them shakily into the bags.

cove starts hauling the suitcases to the car, quiet as can be.

once most things that can fit into your car are closed up, cove stands on the porch of your home. or what used to be your home.

you stand in front of him, shaking.

cove stopped crying awhile ago, and his anger fell off him awhile ago too. now he just looks calm, but if you know him worth anything than you know that once the door closes he'll break.

cove hands you his engagement ring. "sell it, or keep it, propose to your new boyfriend."

cove hands you his half of the $20 bill. you gape at him, god you made a fool of yourself today. "throw it away. burn it. I don't care anymore, so don't hold onto it."

cove crosses his arms, "sell the ring. i don't want it."

cove hands you his engagement ring. "sell the rings, i don't want mine. marry your new boyfriend instead."

he slams the door.

baxter lets you weep. he doesn't feel upset that you're mourning the relationship, you've known him for 15 years and even if you wanted for him, you loved cove everyday until now..

when your family cuts you off and distances themselves, he watches you fall apart.

you just got off the phone with your ma, who chewed you out for choosing baxter of cover. he could hear her yells through the phone since you had it on speaker.

you were going to grocery shop together and cook for a date, but with your shaking hands and puffy eyes, you're in no shape to do anything.

so he lets you cry.

when miranda calls you, he watches the shock on your face morph to shame and pure emptiness.

miranda is screaming, cussing you out for hurting cove.

"why did you have to ruin everything for him?! what's so good about him?!"

you just cry, mumbling sorry's in between miranda's yells.

he holds your hand while you curl in on yourself, tears soaking into the rug under your feet...

baxter helps you pack away the last of your furniture in the house.

when he first entered it, he could tell the love had been ripped off the walls...

there was so much decoration missing.

there weren't any pictures on the walls.

in fact, he found your photo album and your sister takes it from his hands, not looking or speaking to him as she packs it into her bag..

many of the photos he saw were of cove with you and your family. too many memories you won't want and will hide in a dusty corner anyway if you did keep it.

he just carries the boxes to the u-haul, watching the house bleed with everything that comes out of it.

something about the dark house in the distance kills him, and he sits silently in his shame...

over the next few months you finally stop crying.

the phone calls stop coming and you're cheer comes back.

it's definitely different compared to when you were younger, and a far cry from what it was when you were still with cove, but you both act like it never happened.

maybe you're deluding yourselves, but when baxter wakes up and his heart bumps in his chest, it increases his anxiety and he feels like his throat is closing up..

baxter throws the covers off himself, getting up to wash up and find you.

whenever silence comes to him, the shame always finds him...

after changing into new clothes, baxter goes to find you in the kitchen, and when you greet him with a brilliant smile and a kiss, the shame melts away.

this is okay.

baxter stirs, warmed up by your hand caressing his face.

he blinks through blurry vision, smiling as he admires you. "good morning.."

you smile, running your finger along the angle of his nose. "g'morning handsome..." you lean forward n lay a kiss on his cheek.

baxter lets the warmth of your palm sink into his skin, sleep creeping back into him.

"let's get married."

baxter's eyes fly open, gaping at you like a fish.

"w-what?"

you sit up wordlessly, reaching into your nightstand and pulling out a dark purple fabric box, cracking it open to present a ring.

"i love you, and i wanna make sure i keep waking up to you everyday so.. baxter, will you marry me?"

when you come back from your short honeymoon, just a small weekend trip a quick run away from home, to match your quick wedding, your joy seeps through the floor..

for the weekend you didn't look at your phones, or at least didn't check social media and there wasn't any missed phone calls or messages.

but when baxter comes home from work he found you crying softly on the couch, trying to wipe away your tears before baxter could see but it was useless.

he crouched in front of you. "whats wrong?"

you show him derek's message, and once he finishes reading that, you show him one more...

COVE: hey. COVE: congrats on your marriage i guess... just wanted to tell you the house is sold, i gave dad back what he gifted for the down payment and the rest is yours. COVE: bye [you can no longer send messages to this user]

baxter blinks at it slowly... even though he's been so badly betrayed, cove still wishes you congratulations.

cove is a better man than baxter will ever be.

...

baxter sets your phone down, pulling you up and leading you down the hall.

"what do you think about me washing your hair, and after i'll prepare us a nice meal. what do you think?"

it's fine. shame is eating baxter up from his head to his feet, but everything is fine.

even when he pets your hair while you sleep, and whispers into the night. "i'm sorry... you've lost you're family because of me..."

even if he frets about how you've given up everything for him, it's fine.

you're happy together. maybe you can be happy with just the two of you? maybe. maybe...

#our life: beginnings & always #olba #our life baxter #baxter ward x reader #baxter x reader #baxter ward #baxter ward x reader angst #baxter ward x mc #angst #baxter ward angst #baxter ward x mc angst #baxter our life

[binalakai]

i also wish people would be more receptive to relationship speculation, at the very least. there were so many moments in fionna and cake where simon and fionna’s interactions had me raising my eyebrows and thinking “wow, what’s up with this chemistry rn?” but i know posting about it to see if others also noticed would get me dogpiled lol. glad i’m not the only one entertaining the ship and its implications to/for the characters it encompasses.

also winter king/simon is intriguing as well, if only in a weird homestuck self-shipping (dave and davesprite anyone?) kind of way where both characters get to have major epiphanies bc they’re basically looking into a mirror (may be more of a funhouse mirror for winter king/simon but still works lol)

i do not ship any of these pairings, please dont take this post from a shipping perspective

i apologize in advanced if this post is said messy. its given an opening to many things ive been thinking about since the start of the show and i know i wanna come back to it in case any new developments were to happen at the final season 1 episodes tldr; Kai Talks About how much i Love Very Messed Up Pairings, not because i want them to actually be together, but because i am NOT the type to ignore Seeds That Have been Planted in canon so i will Grow Horrible Realizations i've been having out of them

YEAH NO BECAUSE I LIKE. I JUST WANNA POINT OUT WHAT'S CANON OKAY!! i think this post is like. the only one ive seen that Has Pointed out The Adventure Time Ice King/Fionna dynamic in the lenses of the Simon we have today....and even then thats just a joke post :")

because like. okay. i need people to think about this for a second: yes, ice king didn't Come With with Fionna and Cake's existence, but why in the world would he Choose to be responsible for writing it? for bringing their stories to life and showing off a world that's been living in his head? i genuinely think people don't really like the ugly side of how badly loneliness has mutated Ice King's way of thinking (i mean for gods sake the guy tries to kiss/get with anyone, mf cant even recognize the person he claims to be falling in love with). that, yeah. of course if he had a World Living inside his brain that felt so Real to him that he CONSTANTLY wished for it to not only but true, but one that would be close to him!! one that would welcome him!!!! no matter what itd be, romantic, platonic, To the point of Worship....like ANYTHING that would bring him closer to genuine Connection in his alienating experience. NOTABLY for fionna The Human!!! the human that parallels a real life actual kid that mostly has kicked Ice King's ass to eventually treating him like a Poor confused Old Lost Guy. still, i need to stress the kind of dynamic finn and the ice king have is NOWHERE near the kind of dynamic fionna and ice king have (and even with simon developments included). . ...except this time around, even when he does have his own parallel Ice Queen existing manifesting the Must Needed Rival for their universe to make sense, mutating her character into something that to make her more Vicious/Violent, making Ice King seem Nicer In Comparison and dare i say that, yeah...! some of that HAS been carried onto modern day Fionna!! who CANONICALLY has romantic feelings towards ice prince and the winter king, parallels to ice king/simon himself! just. sorry but i NEED both Simon and Fionna to like. Read Those Stories. I Need them to revisit the VERY specific stories that Ice King felt the need to tell in the first place, his and other people in their lives' inclusions. it would not only reinforce Simon's Influence in the world Period, something that he found himself doubting on ...but also I NEEEEEEDDD to see that can of worms opened. i NEED for Fionna to see for herself the people SHE'S supposed to be representing. i NEED for her to see what kind of void she's been filling in Ice King/Simon's time of existence. i NEED for her to see how big the Obsession GOT, how badly Ice King needed that outlet of escapism (and how much Simon still returns to it in the present day)

^ this moment has been living in my brain ever since the announcement of the Fionna and Cake series that Fionna's fixation on the ice prince, her life, her..everything in general, is more or less a Weird Reflection of the lives of People living Greater Lives than she ever believed to have lived, combined with how said proclaimed experiences of Magic have only been recorded by a guy who Inserted Himself in a world she doesnt even recall living in Im surprised that. hasnt been so Stressed yet in show. im prepared to eat my words if they DO come back to it. but for the time being i really wish Fionna found out how desperate Simon/Ice King was for someone to acknowledge and Desire His Existence, to a degree that would be absolutely humiliating/weird to uncover but Necessary to come back to in order to truly understand the Scope of what 1000+ years of Madness through Ostracization (from others and eventually the Self) Does to a MF

__________ AS OF FOR MY THOUGHTS ON THE WINTER KING, he alas only truly an episode to explore. but the thoughts still exist nonetheless!!! for the most part i can only truly indulge in it out of pure hilarity for its existence, while acknowledging how much im so thankful that winter king was characterized as he was n didnt overstay his welcome, as i didnt find him necessary to stay in the narrative . there's a lot of feelings i have about simon/ice king's perception of himself alone, and how most of it is Either Negative or Overcompensation Due to his own self negativity. which makes me curious on what could come of a Better Version of Himself, looking at the version of himself that has "failed" to conquer the crown the way he has, but contemplated on pursuing romantically, even for a brief moment honestly, i dont blame people for being invested in this pairing (in comparison to fionna/simon, where i cannot myself entertain it even as a joke unlike this one). it makes me curious on what the Winter King's definition of romance is in comparison to Simon's. what could even be desirable, possibly, in the eye's of the Winter King? Does the love of someone you'll go mad over truly make you a Better Person Or Worse? Simon and Winter King existing in the same room together brings up so many questions and possible ways to explore Simon's character. wayyyyyyyyyy less of a "this can be simon's way of practicing self love" thing and MUCH more of a "These Guys Kissing each other would be the equivalent of the Narcissus Tale but with a Distorted Reflection that only Represents You because the reflection Demands That of you"

#fionna and cake #adventure time #long post #text heavy #simon petrikov #the winter king #fionna campbell #i WILL delete this though genuinely if people start to get weird in my notes #but otherwise i genuinely would be very welcome to more CIVIL. discussion about this