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#Andrew Hozier Byrne x reader
padfootagain · 4 months
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The Car Trap
Hi!!!!! Here I am again, back to my old antics! Yes, I’m adding one more person to my masterlist. Yes, I am going to hell for this, and you know what? I’ll have such a great time!
Anyway, no one asked for this, except for me, as I was desperate for some Hozier fics, and couldn’t find any new ones anymore! So, here we go! Hope you like this, let me know what you think!
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Pairing: Hozier x reader
Warnings: Angst, fluff, angst to fluff! Friends to lovers, snowed-in… in a car… *hihihihihihhi!!!*
Summary: You're offered a job in Switzerland, and you're ready to accept it. It would offer you a new beginning, a way to forget about the love you have for your best friend. But a trip through a snowstorm with Andrew might change everything...
Word Count: 7282
Hozier’s Masterlist - Main Masterlist
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This trip was a disaster.
A fucking, outrageously terrible disaster…
The weather was terrible, for a start. And that was a statement made with an Irish reference, which was saying a lot. It had been raining so hard you had to stop the car for a while as you could not see the road ahead at all. Then it was time for so much wind that your fingers were cramping over the strength used to hold the wheel. Four hours later, it was getting dark, the sun already setting and the sky heavy with clouds that blocked all sunlight. And it was snowing.
Fucking snowing.
Great. Wonderful. Lovely.
Oh, but if only the problem was held by the capricious weather… no… no, this was but a part of the issue. You could even say that this was the top of the iceberg, just a tiny fraction of the shit you were buried under.
Because your phone had died. But then again, you had no signal anyway to get the help of a friendly and absolutely annoying GPS; and in the passenger seat by your side, your best friend was struggling with a fifteen-year old map that was so out-of-date that it might as well have not existed for the help it got you…
You were lost. You were fucking lost, in the middle of nowhere, while it was getting dark and snowing and there was nothing manmade in sight to ask for help.
Wonderful. Truly, wonderful.
Oh, and that was without mentioning that the best friend in question was also the man you had been in love with for years but had never dared confess your feelings to.
Outrageously bad, that road trip, really…
Andrew picked up his phone to get some more light, his glasses perched haphazardly on his nose as he tried to decipher names printed on the large map splayed across his laps; hair held back in a low bun, allowing you to see his focused features.
“So?”
He merely hummed in response, a long finger following a dark line.
“Do you have any idea where we are?” you insisted.
“None whatsoever,” he shook his head.
He sat back in his seat, before rubbing his eyes.
“I mean… we’ll end up crossing a village at one point if we keep going along this road,” he sighed. “I don’t have a better plan for now.”
“We might have to stop at one point, though. The snow is getting heavy.”
“I had never envisioned dying from the cold in the middle of nowhere on some random Irish road…” Andrew joked, his tone almost contemplative, and you couldn’t refrain a chuckle.
“And with you! Absolutely not. There’s no way I’m dying with you, of all people.”
“Why not? You don’t want to see me dying?”
“I don’t want my last moments to be shared with someone as annoying as you.”
He tried to throw back some witty remark, but his laughter was too much to handle.
He had pushed back the seat as far as possible, of course, in an attempt to accommodate his long limbs, but even in this position, his legs were not fully extended before him, his knees hitting the dashboard at every bump of the road.
You forced your gaze to go back to the road again, squinting your eyes to see through the heavy snow that fell now, instead of lingering on his legs.
God… you were so damn ridiculous…
His quiet rumble of a laugh finally died out, but a smile remained set on his features, even though his tone was serious as he spoke again.
“We can still turn the engines on every once in a while to get some heat.”
“Won’t that drain the battery or something?”
“If we don’t do it too much, it should be fine. Besides, it’s not minus twenty outside, relax. We’ll be fine.”
You merely nodded, falling, as always, for the safety in his quiet voice and the warmth of his tone.
Besides, it was easier to believe in the certainty of his voice, in its soothing sound, than to face the snow falling more and more heavily outside, the night creeping over the distant mountains, right beyond the green fields. Their silhouettes were almost made invisible now by the low light, you could only guess their shadows. Despite the headlights, you could barely make out the stony walls on each side of the road, mostly devoured by ivy and thickets. You had slowed down your pace, driving slowly in fear that a wild animal would suddenly jump in front the car, or that you would miss a random house set by the road.
It was also easier to focus on the silly story he was using to quieten your mind rather than to mention the reason behind this trip across the countryside.
You were leaving.
You were leaving Ireland to settle in Switzerland for a job. Or well, nothing was fixed for now, but you had an amazing opportunity. A first trip to the country to meet your future boss in person was planned for the following week, and at the end of these three days spent in Geneva, you had to sign your contract. You would then have about a month to find a place and move there.
So, you and your best friend had decided to enjoy a little road trip together. Driving all the way to the other side of the country. Staying at an Airbnb near the western coast. Enjoying four days together spent by the sea, the cliffs, and an awful lot of chips and beer.
You had been puzzled by Andrew’s reaction when you told him about your new job. He had seemed… unphased by it.
Of course, with his career, he was often away, and you were used not to live close to each other for long periods of time. Still, you were always one of the first people he visited whenever he was home. And while he stayed in Ireland, you spent most of your time together. As if he wanted to soak in as many moments as he could before he would leave again. And yet, when you told him that you would move to another country, he didn’t even blink. He gave you a smile, congratulated you, offered you a warm hug, and that was it. He asked about the job, about the place where you would live… and that was it. No disappointment in the thought of you leaving. No sadness at the thought of not having you around. No heartbreak whatsoever…
But then again, you were a fool for hoping that he would feel this way. Because he was… Andrew. Absolutely-lovely, amazing-hair, siren-voiced, hilariously-witty, unbearably-gentle Andrew. You had been friendzoned a few weeks after your first encounter, and you had no reason to believe that his feelings had changed. Actually, this new job, you took it as an opportunity to forget him. Move on. And not only because many miles would separate your homes, but because you weren’t leaving on your own.
Another one of your colleagues, Tom, had been approached by the same company as you had. He had already accepted the offer, and he was thrilled when he learned that you were leaving for Geneva as well. You knew he had a crush on you. He was pretty obvious about it. If he had never crossed a line, it was clear that he wanted you to give him a chance. And who knew? Perhaps this new beginning, with another man that you quite frankly found great, could mean you finally moving on from your stupid crush on your best friend. A new start, in another country. After spending a few weeks getting used to this new place, this new corporation, this new workplace… perhaps you would give Tom a chance. You desperately needed to forget Andrew, after all…
Of course, you didn’t know that you were completely, utterly wrong… about everything. That Andrew wanted to cry at the mere thought of you leaving. That he held you too tight and for too long that afternoon when, bathed in the neon light of your kitchen, you told him you were moving so far away from him, because he didn’t want you to see the tears in his eyes. He didn’t have the right to hold you back. He was but a friend to you, and friends needed to be supportive, and this was such a great opportunity for you, and… and he was only your friend.
Only your goddamn friend. As if Andrew hadn’t longed to be much more than that after a mere week spent in your company. But you had met before he would leave, touring for his second album, the timing was all wrong. He couldn’t ask you out for a couple of dates just to get you attached to him, before he would disappear for months on the other side of the planet. That wasn’t fair. He wanted to do things the right way. So, he kept his distance at first, unwilling to get too attached himself. But then, when he came home months later… you weren’t single anymore.
The fool… he had lost his chance. And over the years, the two of you had built such a great friendship that he didn’t want to take the risk anymore. Besides, he was certain that you didn’t see him this way. You had been in relationships, he had been in relationships… you had never showed any sign that would make him feel that he was more than a friend to you. Even when he tried to get you jealous, at the beginning, right after your break-up… but it didn’t work. The lure fell into the water in a deafening defeat, and he had made up both his mind and heart. You weren’t interested. He didn’t blame you. With his chaotic lifestyle.. who in their mind would settle for that?
Did it stop Andrew from still being in love with you, even after all this time? No, of course it did not. And the thought that you wouldn’t be home with him anymore…
He looked away, through the window, just to hide the tears that rose to his eyes all over again. He rested his elbow against the cold window, his lips to the back of his hand, biting lightly in the skin to calm down. He had no right to try to hold you back… no right at all… Was it your fault if he was enough of a fool to fall for his best friend? The cliché was almost too much to bear…
When he turned to you again, though, he couldn’t help the warm, fond feeling that invaded his chest at the sight of you. During the moment of silence you were both bathing into, disturbed solely by the wind and the tires over the frozen road, the night had almost conquered the last remnants of sunlight that lingered there, held against the eastern riff of the mountains. The headlights and the dim lights coming from the headboard were enough for him to see your features, though. They were enough for him to long to brush that strand of hair behind your ear, to lean across the car to kiss your cheek, to feel the warmth of your skin, even if for just a second, against his lips…
God, he didn’t want you to leave. What would he do if you left? When would you see each other? Never… If he spent so much time touring and you weren’t home…
God, he would move to Geneva with you if you asked. Even if it were to keep him as a mere friend, that was how badly he needed you in his life…
“Andy… I’m not sure I should keep driving…”
Andrew shook himself out of his thoughts, forced his attention back to the road ahead. You could barely see the road at all, as it was slowly turning white, just like the patches of grass between the road and the low walls…
Andrew shook his head.
“We can’t just stop in the middle of the road either. Just… drive slowly. Let’s try to find somewhere to park.”
You nodded, frowning in your focus.
You kept on driving for a while longer. The night was stark black when you finally found a small space by the road where you could safely park. There was still no house in sight, though… not that you could have seen anything beyond a five meters radius anyway…
You turned off the engine, let the lights go dark. Andrew turned on the light of his phone again.
“You should save some battery,” you argued.
“Got plenty, don’t worry.”
“So… now, what?”
“Now, we wait.”
“And if it keeps on snowing all night? Should we try to get some sleep?”
He merely nodded, setting his phone between the two of you to shed some light all over the tiny space of your car. Andrew reached behind him to get your coats from the backseat.
“We should put these on while they’re still warm.”
You didn’t complain when Andrew unfolded your warm coat, holding it up so you could easily slip your arms inside; nor did you stop him when he straightened it around your frame, reached for the zipper, and closed it for you.
And perhaps it would have been wiser for you to do so… but then again, you were human.
You were still trying to regulate your heartbeat while Andrew was putting on his own coat.
And for the first half-hour, everything was easy. You turned the engines back on for a few minutes when it got too cold, but in such a weather, you were worried your car wouldn’t start with a low battery. After all, it wasn’t exactly brand new.
“What if we get stuck in here?” you asked, worrying about the snow that didn’t give any sign of stopping.
“We’ll freeze to death, probably. At least the cold will preserve our bodies.”
“Good news for the police officer who’s gonna open the door. The smell won’t be too bad.”
“Exactly.”
“How long do you think before they find us?”
“Oh… at least a few weeks, if it snows enough.”
“Don’t you think anyone would notice a car covered in snow by the side of the road?”
“Not if there’s enough snow on it.”
You were the first to break, unable to be serious any longer. And Andrew’s laugh soon found yours, a deep rumble shaking the air around you.
“We won’t get fully snowed in,” Andrew reassured you as your laughter receded, in favour of the hushed quiet of winter. “Don’t worry. Besides, we’re not going to stay here all night. We’ll just wait until the worst of the storm passes. I can drive the rest of the way, if you want.”
“I can keep driving. I think I’ll try to take a nap while we wait though. I need to focus.”
Andrew merely nodded as an answer, adding a soft humming for good measure, before he would offer you a warm smile. He reached for something in his pocket, and put on a beanie and some gloves.
“I’ll keep an eye out,” he added, shifting to get more comfortable, the seatbelt since long discarded.
You tried to do the same, sliding the seat back to get more room to move around. Your eyes settled on Andrew’s features one more time before they closed.
But there was no way you could fall asleep. Beside your troubled mind, you were getting uncomfortably cold again. Enough for your teeth to chatter for a moment, until you tightly set your jaw.
You felt warm skin brush the back of your freezing fingers, heard the low, unapproving humming that Andrew let out at the touch.
“Take these, Y/N.”
You blinked your eyes open, while Andrew was already pushing a glove into your palm.
“You’ll be cold,” you argued, but you were met with a fond glare.
“You are cold.”
You gave up, took the gloves he offered. So large around your hands, the wool soft and still holding the warmth born from his own skin. You tried to stop him from planting his beanie on your head too, but failed.
“You need to stay warm! You’re a singer! You can’t catch a cold!” you tried to argue, but Andrew was already pulling the wool down to cover your ears.
“Don’t worry about me. I’m just fine. Besides, you’re the one who’s always cold.”
“Am not!”
“Are too! Who wears a woollen scarf in June?”
“It was cold!”
“You could turn into an ice cube if left unattended.”
With a great sense of maturity, you stuck out the tip of your tongue, making him chuckle.
It was better, but you were still cold, and so was Andrew now. He was shaking slightly, rubbing his hands together, burying his mouth and nose in his woollen grey scarf to warm it with his breath. But when he tried to shed some light outside again, the snow was still too heavy to drive safely.
“I can’t feel my fucking toes,” he complained, but there wasn’t much that you could do.
Except that you could. It was stupid, probably ineffective, but you were too cold to think straight.
“What if we hugged?”
Andrew let out a laugh.
“I like the sentiment, but that would hardly warm my toes.”
“Isn’t sharing body warmth a surviving technique?”
“Do I look like I would survive in the wild?”
“No, you would either bump your head in a branch so hard you’d knock yourself out to fall right into an endless pit… or you would be spotted by lions from miles away, you and your long limbs…”
“Exactly.”
There was silence again, for a couple of minutes, and you didn’t dare to break it. Instead, you let your eyelids fall again. He had refused to hold you, it was speaking volumes. What if you had made him uncomfortable? What were you expecting anyway? You were just a friend…
A gentle tug on your sleeve made you look up at him.
“Come here.”
“What?”
“We’re both cold, come here. You’re right, body heat sounds like a good idea.”
You joked in an attempt to hide the way your heart jumped in your chest.
“We both know you simply like to be held. Even by me.”
“Anything if I can avoid losing my toes.”
You wished you could claim that the manoeuvre that led you to lie with Andrew was a graceful one, but it truly wasn’t. After bumping into every surface possible and hitting your head against the ceiling twice, you were, however, finally secured in Andrew’s arms.
You moved around a little, trying to get comfortable, but in the tiny space of the passenger seat, there was nowhere for you to lay but on top of him.
If your nerves were getting the better of you at first, you couldn’t help but unwind as Andrew wrapped his arms around your frame, engulfing you within his embrace, pressing you closer to him, even though it didn’t seem possible.
He closed his eyes as he breathed in the sweet scent of your shampoo, but you didn’t notice. You didn’t notice either the way his heart sped up under his ribs, the way his breath caught in his throat. You never seemed to notice. Andrew reckoned that he was pretty obvious, although he did try to hide it all, but you never noticed anything. He couldn’t hide it, though. Even if this would lead nowhere, even if he didn’t stand a chance, he couldn’t help it. Loving you. In all the years he had known you, he had never been able to help it. Perhaps that was what love was all about. Loving beyond reason. Loving even when he wished he didn’t. Loving, and hurting, and having no regrets about it. Hurting, and being willing to go through all this pain all over again, for just a moment more…
He heaved a sigh without noticing, his eyelids lifting to be faced by a wall of darkness spotted with white snowflakes. He was ridiculous. You were leaving, that was the final proof he needed to be certain that he was nothing but a friend to you. If you felt anything for him, you wouldn’t be leaving… right? He had not left. He could have moved to the US a thousand times over, but you were in Ireland. Of course, you weren’t the only reason for him to stay, but you were easily the most important one, the one that carried the most weight.
What was the point of going home after a tour or a long recording session, if home wasn’t where you were?
Pathetic. That was what he was, pathetic…
Besides, you deserved better than what he could offer. Waiting for him for months on end? A constant back-and-forth between nations, a life stuck in a suitcase? No… no, you deserved better than that. Better than what he could offer you. Better than him…
And you were leaving. Final proof…
He held you tighter, and almost released it all in a breath.
Don’t go. Please, don’t go…
“Andy?”
He merely hummed in response.
“I’m pretty sure this is doing nothing to keep us warm.”
“I think it helps.”
“We’re wearing too many clothes.”
“Are you offering a game of strip-poker or something?”
You didn’t look up at him, face still buried in his shoulder, and yet he knew you were rolling your eyes.
“I must be crushing you.”
“You’re breaking all my bones, indeed.”
You tried to move away, but his hold tightened, and he looked down at you with confusion.
“What are you doing?”
“Saving your life? Avoiding you to be crushed to death?”
“I was joking. I’m alright.”
“Really?”
“Yeah… yeah, that’s… nice.”
You weren’t sure what to make of such comment, so you remained quiet instead, breathing deeply his scent, feeling it numb your senses.
“I’ve never seen such a snowstorm,” he pointed out, gaze lost into the darkness ahead.
“Me neither.”
“Not in this part of the world, at least.”
“Typical of Ireland to send me the storm of the century as a farewell gift.”
You felt Andrew tensing under you, his voice was colder than usual as he spoke, but you weren’t sure what to make of it.
“When will you leave? For good, I mean.”
“I have a month after this short stay to find myself a place to rent and get to work.”
“But you’ll come back to visit, right?”
“Yeah, of course! I mean… when I’m on vacation. To see my family.”
“Will I get some free housing in Geneva, then?”
“You thief, as usual.”
“You know me. Always the rascal.”
You closed your eyes as he started to rub your back, the gesture gentle and amazingly soothing.
“Aren’t you afraid to go there on your own?”
“Yeah… yeah, a little bit,” you admitted in a breath. “But… at least Tom will be there.”
“Tom?”
“Yeah, you know? My colleague? He’s very nice, I like him a lot. We’re leaving together.”
His tall frame tensed again, you caught the way his breath staggered.
“What do you mean Tom is leaving too?”
You stared into his hazel eyes; these eyes you dreamt of at night, the ones you adored. They had taken the hue of leaves before Autumn, deep green in a ray of sunshine. They always did when tears came to his eyes. And indeed, you were surprised as you fell into his gaze to find it blurred with tears.
“You… you’re leaving with him?” he asked, voice deeper than usual, shaky, vulnerable.
You were aware, now more than ever, of how close you were. You stared up at him, lost in his eyes, and you thought of how it would be so easy to lean up and kiss him, make his frown melt away, shush his worry with your lips…
“I thought… why…?”
You shrugged, unsure of what he meant to say.
“We’ve been approached by the same company. We’ll both move to Geneva.”
“Together?!”
“I mean… at the same time, yes.”
“But you’re…”
So that was it then… you had found someone else again. And this time you were leaving in another country with this man and…
And Andrew had lost you for good.
He was only too aware of how close the two of you were, of how easy it would have been to simply lean down to kiss you. Press his lips to yours, forget you were choosing someone else…
But he couldn’t forget. He couldn’t take it.
Instead of leaning closer, he pushed you away.
“Get off.”
You frowned at the roughness in his voice, the coldness in his tone, and Andrew wished he could control himself, be gentle, the way you deserved, but he needed to get away if he wanted to keep breathing…
“Please, get off me.”
You blinked tears away, and he hated himself for being the cause of such a sight, but he didn’t stop you when you ungracefully pushed yourself back into the driver’s seat. And Andrew watched as you stared at him, expectant, like you didn’t understand that you were breaking his heart in a million pieces…
And he couldn’t take it.
You were so surprised when Andrew opened the door and climbed out of the car that you didn’t stop him. He was already out of sight when you shook yourself enough to grab his phone, the only source of light available, and jumped out of the car as well.
The wind was bitterly cold as it assailed your cheeks, the snow rough and sharp digging into your skin.
“ANDREW!”
You hurried around the car, struggling with the slippery ground.
Above the wind, there was nothing to be heard but your own voice. Betrayed by the night, even this sound seemed to fade too fast to reach anything out of your sight. And Andrew was nowhere to be seen, the darkness too thick for that, the elements howling too loudly.
“ANDREW!”
A thud. A groan. A hiss. You followed the sounds in a hurry, and sure enough, mere seconds were needed to find your friend half-lying in the snow, a hand gripping at the low stone wall.
“ANDY!”
You kneeled by his side, uncaring of the sharp sting of the frozen ground under your knees.
“Are you alright?”
But he nodded, without a word. He seemed in pain, you brushed a loose strand of his hair behind his ear, and he leaned into your touch without noticing.
“You’re okay? What the fuck are you doing?!”
“You’re leaving for him, right?”
“What on earth are you talking about?!”
“TOM! FUCKING TOM!”
He moved away from your touch, but winced as he leaned against the wall. Your eyes grew round in worry, and when you turned the light towards the stones, there were traces of blood there.
“Oh God… Andy, you’re hurt!”
“It’s nothing,” he shook his head.
“Let me see…”
But he stood up instead, and you followed close. He was towering you, the way he always did. The difference in height had not been so obvious in the car, but now, he was standing before you in his full, impressive height, and the way he glared made it more intimidating than usual.
“You’re really leaving for a fucking guy you met at work?!”
You frowned, shaking your head.
“Andy, I’m not…”
“Have you lost your fucking mind?!”
“Andy…”
“For how long have you two even been together?”
“We’re not! We’re not together.”
It was his time to frown in confusion.
“What?”
“Tom and I, we’re not together. We’ve been approached by the same company, that’s all. Although, if I’m being honest… I might give him a chance.”
“What?”
You noticed how he was out of breath, of course you did. He didn’t seem angry anymore, just…sad. Unbearably sad…
“Well, he’s nice… and… I know he likes me. But… can we go back to the car now?”
“Don’t go with him.”
You stared up at him, his hair messed by the wind as more strands were breaking free from his bun. Snowflakes stained the dark locks with white. Some got caught in his long eyelashes. The biting cold was turning his sharp cheekbones red. In the dim light, you couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth, even though you could see the lips moving with the vowels, closing with consonants…
“Don’t go. Y/N… don’t go.”
These were words you were longing to hear, and yet, now that he was finally speaking them out loud, you couldn’t take them in.
He had acted like he didn’t care for weeks, and now, all of a sudden, he claimed that he was hurting?
“That’s rich coming from someone who spends barely any time home.”
You knew you were being mean, and you felt guilty as a shock of pain ran through Andrew’s features, enough so to bring tears back in his eyes. Still, you didn’t take your words back.
“That’s not the same. This… this is still my home.”
“This is a great opportunity for my career. This would be a new start. I’m excited about it. And Tom is nice. He likes me. He wants me…”
“You’re saying that like you don’t have a family and friends and people who love you already.”
“You know what I mean. This is a great opportunity, Andy. I want to take it.”
You noticed the way he clenched his jaw, the way the muscle jumped there as he lowered his gaze to the ground, nodding slowly.
“You’re right… that’s a great opportunity. You should take it…”
But instead of you agreeing, he was surprised as you huffed in annoyance, and turned your back to him.
“Get your arse back in the car, come on.”
“Y/N…”
“I don’t understand what you want, Andy!” you hissed as you turned back to him, and he hated the sharpness in your voice, it felt like a knife. “You act like you don’t give two fucks about me leaving for weeks! And now… now you’re acting like you want me to stay…!”
“Of course, I want you to stay! But I’m your friend, I’m supposed to be here for you, and to support you and encourage you…”
“So you’re glad that I’m leaving?” your voice rising into a shout, and his tone matched yours when he answered, making you tremble under his deep, powerful voice.
“Of course not! Are you listening to yourself?! Why would I want you to move to fucking Geneva!”
“Because you didn’t say a thing about it!” you were crying, but you didn’t even notice, too busy letting your feelings out, at long last. “Because everyone else tried to convince me to stay, and you didn’t!”
“I tried to be supportive!”
“Well, I didn’t want you to supportive!”
“What did you want then?!”
“The truth!”
“Well, I don’t want you to leave! Here’s your fucking truth! And I don’t want you to leave with fucking Tom! I want you to choose me!”
He was out of breath now, and as he moved closer to you and the light you still held tightly in your hand, you finally noticed that he was crying as well.
“Choose you?” you asked, confused and slightly calmer, even if your voice kept on shaking. “Why would you want me to choose you…?”
“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!”
The words were out before he could hold them in; failing this time at this game he had played a thousand times before, every time the words almost slipped out, when he bit his tongue until it hurt so you wouldn’t hear his heart. Your eyes grew round like you were surprised, shocked even, like this was not the most obvious truth in the world, like he had not spent years loving you in secret, leaving traces of his bleeding heart all over the place…
He almost wanted to laugh at you, at your round eyes and parted lips and all that snow caught in your hair and the way he longed to kiss that shock off your face. He didn’t though. Because you took a step back, and he read fear in your eyes, and he realised then that you were slipping away, sand between his fingers although he tried to hold tight.
“Y/N…” he breathed, voice taken away by the wind before it could reach you.
You hurried to the car instead of answering, and he followed you this time, shivering in the cold. And once you were back in the safety of your vehicle, the seats had lost their warmth, and the tiny space between the two of you seemed unbearably vast, a chasm you would never be able to close or cross.
You were both staring out by the windshield, while the snow finally receded. You could start driving again…
“Can you say something?”
“We should try to drive again.”
“Y/N… please…”
But as you turned to him, it was to stare at his palm, not his gaze.
“You’re bleeding.”
Andrew followed your gaze, looked down at his own hand. There was a long cut across the palm, red with blood, darkened with dirt on some spots. In the dim light, it was hard to tell how deep the cut was. It hurt, that was for sure. And yet, he didn’t care. You were more painful than an open wound.
“It’s nothing…”
“Let me see.”
You took off the gloves he had lent you, and Andrew didn’t have the strength to stop you as you gently reached for his hand, cradled it in yours, held it to the light to get a better view. Your skin was warm and soft against his cold one, and the thought that you could hate him, that you could resent him for sharing feelings he knew as unrequited made the tenderness of your hold almost unbearable.
“How did you hurt yourself?”
“I slipped in the snow. Caught myself to the wall. Sharp stone.”
You heaved a sigh, the sound was almost annoyed, but not quite. More like… worried.
“Hold the light, would you?”
He didn’t think as he obeyed, yielding to your will, the way he always did. You grabbed a bottle of water and some tissues from the glove box, and started to slowly clean up his cut. You were leaning closer to do so, and Andrew couldn’t help himself as he leaned forward as well, longing for your nearness, basking in the touch of your hand as it came back to cradle his, drawn to you like a moth to a flame.
The breath he let out before speaking again was shaking.
“Do you hate me?”
You looked up, seemed to realize how close the two of you were. You could easily lean up and kiss him, and he could easily lean down and press his lips to yours. Instead, you both remained motionless, perfectly still, merely staring while he waited for an answer you thought was too obvious to be spoken.
“Why would I?” you asked back.
“Because… because we’re friends. And I caught feelings. And… maybe you hate me now that you know that I don’t… I don’t see a friend in you at all. Now that you know that I lied.”
But you didn’t answer, instead, you lowered your gaze again, and Andrew jumped and let out a hiss as you pressed the wet tissues against his broken skin.
“I’m not angry,” you finally reassured him. “I’m just… I don’t really believe you, I think.”
“What? Why wouldn’t you?”
You shrugged, and despite your claim of being calm, the smile that formed on your lips was bitter when you spoke.
“For how long have we been friends? And you’ve never said anything? Never felt anything, until I decided to go away? And now, all of sudden, you’re catching feelings?”
“I’ve never said these feelings were new.”
“You friendzoned me, back in the days. Do you remember that?”
Andrew winced, but nodded anyway.
“This… this was different.”
“Because I was just a friend?”
“Because I was the one leaving. Because it wasn’t fair to ask you out just to disappear for months while I was touring.”
Finally, you looked up again, trying to read something in his eyes, and whatever it was, Andrew hoped that you would find it there. He hoped you could see that he was being earnest, that he meant it, that there was no doubt to have. He had never doubted his love for you, even if he had refrained it. It had been a truth he had relied on for years. With a bit of luck, you might want to rely on it too…
“But then you came back… why didn’t you say anything then?”
“You weren’t single anymore. It was my turn to get friendzoned.”
The ghost of a smile formed on his lips, a soothing offering. But it was sad all the same.
“And after that?”
“After that… you were already my best friend. You… I didn’t want to lose you. And you… you deserved better than that. You deserve better than what I can give you. Waiting around while I disappear for months, what kind of life is that?”
You stopped breathing as he lifted his unharmed hand up to your face, brushing his fingertips across your cheek, the way he had longed to for years.
If his heart was staggering behind his ribs, if his breath was caught in his throat because of this gentle touch of your skin, when he closed his eyes to gather his strength, there was a tear breaking free.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I know you don’t feel the same,” he shook his head as he opened his eyes again, falling into your gaze, and he saw there the same tears he tried to withhold in his own eyes. “I know it’s a one-sided thing. I didn’t… I didn’t want to break everything. I’m sorry.”
He was surprised when you shook your head and leaned into his touch, forcing his hand to open so he could cradle your face in his palm, long fingers disappearing into your hair and tenderly brushing your skin.
“God, you’re such an idiot.”
He raised a surprised eyebrow, not daring to move or reply. You started laughing, and he was at a loss.
“We’re both so damn stupid!”
He had to blink to make sure that he wasn’t imagining your movement as you slowly closed the gap between the two of you, as you leaned up to meet him. He was too surprised by it to meet you halfway; he was too taken aback by the feeling of your lips against his to kiss you back. It took him a couple of seconds to process that this was truly happening, that he was not, in fact, lost in one of the many dreams he’d had of this moment. But then your hand was in the mess of his curls, and you were pressing your lips more firmly against his, and he allowed himself to believe that you wanted this as well, that perhaps he had been, indeed, such an idiot for failing to see what was right in front of him, the same way you had missed all of his gestures along the years.
And you wished you could admit to yourself that you were keeping control over the situation, having instigated the kiss, but you melted into his touch the second Andrew responded and kissed you back. His hold on your face tightened slightly, a tinge of desperation held in the gesture. You tightened your hold on his wounded hand, and he responded by twisting his wrist until he could hold onto your hand too. You chased after him as he pulled away, but he left only for a second, just long enough to tilt his head slightly to the side, bettering the angle of his next kiss so he could deepen it. And the second you could properly taste him on your tongue, you lost track of everything but him: the warmth of his scent, the softness of his touch, the smoothness of his skin, his curls running through your fingers, the gentle scratching of his beard, and the overwhelming feeling of being kissed by him. The feelings he poured into the intimate gesture… no one had ever kissed you like that before…
When you broke apart, at long last, both of you breathless, blinking the dizziness of the kiss away in an attempt to find back an earthly footing, Andrew pressed his forehead to yours, afraid, perhaps, that if he got too far, he would wake.
“I don’t see you as a mere friend either, in case that was still unclear,” you clarified, tone half-joking, making him smile.
“Right…”
“You’re okay?”
“Just… trying to assess whether I’m awake or dreaming right now.”
Playfully, you pinched his shoulder, making both of you laugh.
“Awake,” you confirmed. “Even your wild imagination could not have pictured the storm of the century as a background for our first kiss.”
“First? Can I have another, then?”
You couldn’t refrain a giggle, gently shaking your head at him, brushing your nose against his in the process.
“A true thief, as always.”
“Of the worst kind only.”
His thumb caressed your cheekbone, soft touch across your soft skin, making your eyes flutter shut as your heart lost its rhythm.
“If you want to take this job in Geneva, we can still make it work.”
You lifted your eyelids again and pulled back, just to fall right into his hazel eyes.
“Just… don’t choose Tom…”
You shook your head, giving him a reassuring smile. Your hands moved to hold his face in both of your palms, to make sure he would keep staring at you as you answered.
“Fuck Tom. Fuck Geneva. I’d rather go on a date with you.”
Andrew let out a chuckle, eyes crinkling as he smiled. Still, he had tears in his eyes all over again.
“You said it yourself, though. It’s a great opportunity for you.”
“I want to stay. If we give this a try, I want to stay.”
“Y/N…”
“I’m sure.”
“I’ll be away for months…”
“And you’ll be the one paying for the plane tickets, I’m not emptying my bank account when I’ve got a millionaire as a boyfriend.”
You both laughed, and Andrew nodded, at last.
“Fair enough.”
You were about to speak but didn’t have the time, Andrew was leaning to kiss you again instead, and you couldn’t complain, didn’t want to stop his fall towards your mouth.
He hissed and pulled away too fast though, after mere seconds, looking down at his wounded palm that he had tried to press against your back.
“I should clean this up, and then we can keep on driving,” you proposed, and Andrew agreed with a nod, obediently holding his hand still while you took care of him. He did lean to kiss your forehead a couple of times though, and you were both still quite amazed that he could do it, or that he wanted to.
You would have to get used to it though. After the storm had passed, after you had found your way back onto the right road, after you had reached your destination, there was plenty of time to talk, to confess feelings you had both refrained for too long, for holding onto each other too tightly, for kissing until lips were bruised and numb and yet still willing.
Perhaps, this trip was not such a disaster, after all…
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contentloadinggg · 3 months
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Game of Distraction - Hozier Drabble
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The way I’d give him the creamiest, soul sucking, heaven sent, sloppy, wet, back arching, begging for mercy, praying for God to take him, soul enlightening, spiritual experience head the earth has ever seen. THAT SLUTTY SWEATER TOO. GOD.
Anyways, Drabble more or less inspired by this pic. I can’t tell if this is making me more or less sane.
Summary: Andrew can’t play chess with you in his sweater. (Genderneutral! Reader) (~400 words)
Warnings: Surprisingly none, just a bit of making out towards the end and suggestive talk. No beta reading, I wrote this in 20 minutes.
This is a work of fiction and not a reflection of who Hozier is
Fic under the cut🤎
“Checkmate.”
You declared, dramatically knocking over Andrew’s castle in this very heated game of chess. The man groans in response, dropping his head on to the table.
“This isn’t fair!”
He calls into the wood of the tabletop. He pushes his long curls away from his face when he decides to lift his head back up. Meeting your eyes and seeing your amusement, he scowls.
“Don’t look at me like that.”
“Why is it not fair, Andy?”
The man looks at you with exasperation.
“Like you don’t know.”
He replies, stiffly. You smile, learning forwards by placing your elbows on the table.
“No, I don’t. Tell me.”
Andrew sighs deeply. His eyes are getting distracted by your bare collarbones. Oh yes, he’s definitely thinking about why it’s not fair.
“Because, you’re cheating.”
His vagueness is purposeful. He doesn’t want to admit that the sight of you wearing his sweater has got him all hot beneath the collar. All oversized on you, dropping low on your shoulders. You’re gorgeous, of course. But since when is he the one to fold so easily?
“Cheating? How?”
It’s a goad. You know exactly why. Andrew stays quiet.
For one,
Two,
Three seconds.
And he’s up.
Out of his seat. Andrew is on you faster than you can replace the breath he knocks out of you. He’s practically biting rather than kissing you. Teeth scraping over your bottom lip.
You’re swift to return it. The tip of your tongue running over his bared teeth. One might call it violent. His beard gently scratches at your skin and his fingers gripping your legs. But if that’s true, It’s a crime of passion.
Andrew lifts you up onto the table. It rocks on its legs with your shared movements. The chess pieces scattering across the board and floor. The wooden pieces on the hard ground are loud, but not loud enough to make you even think about picking them up.
Bites trail down the length of your throat. Teeth pulling at your tendons, but careful not to break skin. Andrew’s only goal is to lift the blood to show a bright pink color against your skin.
Reaching the collar of the sweater. Andrew breathes out shakily. As if just recalling why this started in the first place. You tug lightly on his hair. Urging him to continue.
The man looks back up at you. A familiarly wild look in his eye.
“Let’s get this sweater off you, yeah?”
He asks, running his hands beneath it over your bare skin. Voice rough.
“What? Tired of me ‘cheating’?”
“Don’t push it.”
I revisited some old poems and that’s what inspired this lol. Just wanted to post something while I struggle with my Alex fic.
-Thad💚
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crimsonred-hi · 2 months
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Wash Day
Pairing: Andrew Hozier-Byrne x Reader
Warnings:
Summary: Wash day is Sunday, so Andrew and his girlfriend get in the shower together (not sexually).
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He’s just minding his business, siting in the living room of your home, book in hand, glasses on his face. He’s nice and comfy, content, thinking his gonna be sat there for a while,
“It’s wash day!”
There, all ruined in a 3 word sentence, his day of lounging around and reading is destroyed by his girlfriend yelling that today is the day of the week where she washes his hair… because apparently he can’t do it himself.
Begrudgingly, he puts down his book, making his way up to the big bathroom in the house. There’s his girlfriend, smiling at him, with the little (it’s not little who is he kidding) basket of hair products.
Two washes, conditioner, hair mask, a plethora of curly hair products, and other tools she’ll ’torture’ him with. That’s how this will go, that’s how it happens every week on Sunday.
Sunday is wash day, she washes his hair then her own. It’s always wash day, yet every week he forgets how bad it is, then has to do it again.
“Come on, strip.”
She says with a smile, Turing on the shower so it can warm up.
“Wow… what am I, a common whore?”
She giggles at him, before getting undressed herself so they can get in together. A few minutes later, she’s got him sat on the floor, so she can reach his head, in the large shower. First step is getting his hair wet, the shower head is pulled off the wall to make this happen. She points the warm water start at his hair, getting it wet, then for the fun of it she spritz of water into his face,
“Aye!”
“Oh, hush. You spend you mornings in the Irish Sea, a little warm water to the face isn’t gonna kill you.”
He grumbles, at her words, crossing his arms as his girlfriend gets his hair all drenched so it can be shampooed.
And thats the next thing, a shampoo bar is pulled out of the basket, it’s taken out of the case it’s kept in so it doesn’t mould. She scrubs his hair with the bar, until it starts to bubble up, the bar is discarded and she just massages his scalp and rubs the shampoo into his hair.
He leans back into her tummy, his eyes closed, a low hum of pleasure coming from deep into his chest.
“Does that feel good, Bear?”
The reply comes in a soft rumble from his chest, she giggles at his enjoyment, continuing to massage the built up dirt from his hair and scalp.
She grabs the shower head, washing the first round of shampoo out of his hair. The warm water runs over his head and face, dripping down his body, leaving a sweet soothing feeling down his body.
She moves about, putting the first shampoo bar back in the basket,
“Ooo! Do you want to try this honey scented  shampoo?”
He doesn’t care, what she uses on his hair. He’s just mindless, so deep in the soothing pleasure of her touch. He just nods in his mindless state.
She smiles, repeating the acts again. She opens the shampoo bar, except she holds it to his nose before she uses it, its smells great. She scrubs the bar into his hair, then massages it into his scalp and hair. Then washes it out.
“There we go! That’s the first thing done, and we’re only 15 minutes in.”
She says with a smile, kissing his cheek, as if praising him for just sitting still so she could wash his hair.
She moves off to the basket, putting everything back, and finally pulling conditioner out. She move to his hair, slathering the conditioner on her hands, then threading it through his hair, making sure not to get it on his roots. Finally she pulls out, washing off the conditioner on her hands,
“3 minutes wait time, just sit there and look pretty.”
He smiles at her comment, then 3 minutes later she washes the conditioner out, the a hair mask is caked on his hair. She wraps a shower cap around his head.
“Come on, hun… I’ve gotta wash my hair while that mask does its thing.”
“Yes, ma’am”
He moves to a small stone bench kept in their large shower, and he just watches as she washes her own hair.
It’s a lot quicker for her to wash her hair, because she’s been doing this since she was a kid. Washing her hair out, it’s takes all of 15 minutes for her to shampoo her hair twice and condition it. That leaves another 15 minutes for his hair mask, so she puts her own hair mask in.
“Are you done, honey?”
She hums back at him, moving back to him, standing in front of him, her hands on his cheeks, rubbing his cheekbones with her thumbs.
“Hey, do you recon we should shampoo and condition your beard?”
She jokes, the answer is yes, they could shampoo and condition his beard. But he doesn’t want to say yes, because then washing his beard will also become a regular thing.
“……no.”
“Are you lying to me?”
“No…”
“Yes, you are… we should wash your beard!”
“Please no…”
It was too late, now their sat on the shower floor, her rubbing the honey shampoo bar along his cheek. Giggling at his little pout. She rubs the shampoo into his beard, her hands moving along his cheeks, smiling at him warmly.
“Why…? You didn’t have to do this to me…”
She giggles, kissing his lips, so some of the shampoo transfers onto her cheeks as well.
“Look at that! No we’re matching!”
She says happily, we do match, both in shower caps with shampoo foam on our cheeks. She smiles at him, grabbing the shower head and washing the shampoo off his and her cheeks. Then she moves in with the conditioner to his beard, and his pout only gets bigger.
“Please tell me we’re not doing this again…”
She laughs, waiting the 3 minutes for the conditioner, then washing off.
“Look, time to wash out your hair mask!”
His sighs, when the shower cap is pulled off his head, just to get slapped in the face with his hair, making his lover laugh.
The hair mask is washed out, and she leaves him to wash his body while she finishes washing her hair and her own body.
___
She now has Andrew sat in her vanity chair, having other products scrunched into his hair. She’s stood behind him, finger coiling his hair, separating his strands of hair and coiling them so she doesn’t have to put his hair in rolls.
“Now, Andy… I’m gonna give you the choice, do you want to defuse your hair or not?”
“No, I just want to get dry and read my book… please.”
She smiles softly, kissing his cheek softly, tying his hair up in an old cotton t-shirt so it can dry naturally.
“Ya know, I should get you a bonnet.”
He sighs, not really listening anymore, he just gets into pyjamas and goes back downstairs to sit in his arm chair with the book he’s been trying to read.
And then, she joins him, making herself comfortable in his lap as he reads.
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bisexual-apocalypse · 29 days
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FUCK IT. YA BOI IS BOUTA WRITE HIS OWN HOZIER FICS (watch this become a Hozier simping page)
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beat-the-morning · 3 months
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AFTER-CONCERT FEAST
Rating: +18
Relationships: Hozier/Reader
Contents: no y/n, oral sex (f! recieving), cunnilingus, vaginal fingering, dry humping, accidental orgasm, (by this I mean he starts mindlessly humping the couch
Word count: 1.7k
SUMMARY: After Hozier, your boyfriend, calls you backstage after a concert he eats you out like a starving man and cums after mindlessly dry humping the couch while doing so.
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Fic under the cut💜
The concert had ended, and you were making your way backstage with a security guard in front of you. Andrew, your boyfriend, had sent them to get you, and your mind couldn't stop racing with how he’d looked at you while he sang. How his eyes lit up when he saw you in the crowd, the little smile that escaped him, that verse he messed up on when you winked at him. You could have sworn that he didn’t take his eyes off you for the rest of the concert once he noticed you.
“Here,” the security guard said, opening the door to Andrew’s dressing room. You smiled at them and nodded as a thank you before stepping in. He was waiting for you, leaning on the vanity with his arms crossed over his chest.
“Close the door, it’s fine.” He told the security guard, the door closed behind you and you smiled. He practically bounced off the vanity and onto you with how fast he took you into his arms and lifted you off the floor in a spinning hug. “What are you doing here?” He asked as he finally lowered you from his embrace.
“Came to see you,” you answered with a grin.
Andrew chuckled, then started kissing your face with every pause he took from speaking. “Yes, but why? Weren’t you visiting your parents this week?”
“Yes, but you having a concert in the same city distracted me a little.” You giggled, his beard tickling you.
“Oh, forgot your parents lived here,” he looked down at you with loving eyes that turned to confusion the second he realised what you had done. “Wait, so you bought a ticket, queued for God knows how long-”
“Twelve hours.” You interrupted him
“Twelve hours?” His eyes widened at that fact. “You did that, when you could've called me and gotten in faster and also seen me before the concert?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“I wanted to surprise you!” You smiled. “And I wanted to see if you'd notice me in the crowd.”
“Well I did, couldn't take my eyes off you,” he kissed your lips.
“I know,” you kissed back. “There's going to be a million tiktoks asking who you were looking at.”
“I don't-” he stopped his sentence halfway through once he saw your shirt. “Are you wearing my shirt?” He asked, raising an eyebrow and smirking, he already knew the answer.
“No.” You lied, as it was, in fact, his shirt that he had accidentally left at your house the last time he saw you.
“You definitely are.”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” you teased, he rested a hand on your hip, his thumb making small circles on your skin.
“I’m sure you don’t.” His other hand rested on your cheek, caressing it gently.
Then he kissed you again, not letting go this time, you got on your tip-toes and wrapped your arms around his neck. He lowered himself lightly and bit your lower lip, you moaned in response. He broke the kiss and guided you to the couch where he pulled you onto his lap so that you were straddling him. You kissed him again, more passionate this time, almost hungrily, his hands explored the skin under your shirt, revelling in your warmth.
You explored each other's mouths, delighting in the taste you had so missed, the way his beard scratched your face felt like heaven, his hands travelled to your hips and ground you against him, you could feel his hardening cock rubbing against you and he could hear your whimpers every time your clit got the slightest bit of friction. He slowly lifted you up and changed the pose you were both in, setting you on the couch, and taking off your shirt and bra, promptly discarding them on the floor next to him.
Andrew's lips left your mouth and moved down from your jawline to your waistband, leaving bites and hickeys on his way, he was giving you goosebumps with the way he caressed your body so lovingly, worshipping every curve, every mole and little imperfection, as you called them, seemed like gold in his eyes, like beautiful stars in a sky only he could see. Once at your hips, he looked up at you with lustful eyes, “I need to taste you, so fucking badly,” he whispered, “but I need you to be quiet, can you do that for me, baby?”
“You know the answer to that,” you answered with a grin, already kicking off your shoes.
“Yeah, I do,” he smiled back, quickly kissing you one last time before he unzipped your shorts and pulled them off completely along with your panties, throwing them to the floor as soon as they were off you, joining the rest of your clothing. He kissed his way up your thighs, resting your legs on his shoulders. He looked up at you with his beautiful green eyes, pupils dilated to a point where they looked black, silently begging you to give him the final go-ahead before he lost himself in you.
You nodded, he smiled.
He dove into you like a starving man having his first meal in weeks, lapping up your juices and drinking you. You arched your back in pleasure. He licked from your entrance up to your clit, pressing his tongue to it just to flick it right after, you bit your lip in an attempt to quiet down, but it barely worked. His tongue worked at you expertly, he knew exactly what to do to make you squirm under his touch. His tongue travelled down from your clit to your entrance, where he lost himself and moaned just with your taste. Your breathing hitched at the sight of him eating you out, completely enamoured with his eyes closed. He was moaning as he fucked you with his tongue. As his nose rubbed on your clit just right, you thanked God for giving him a big one.
You moved his long curls out of his face, he looked up at you. Your breathing stopped for a second as he rubbed his nose against your clit while smiling into your cunt, in blinding lust you grabbed a fistful of his hair and started grinding your hips against his face. You could've sworn you heard him chuckle. The way he was holding onto your hips was sure to leave bruises later on, you didn't care one bit, you were too focused looking into his eyes and the way they were full of lust and admiration for you. How he kept eating you out even as you held his head in place and basically used him.
He was so hard it was starting to become painful, so he started rubbing himself against the couch, and God did it feel good, he started moaning into your pussy, your taste was driving him crazy, the little sounds that escaped you while he devoured you just got him harder and harder. He left your hole to go back up to your clit, sucking on it and pressing his tongue against it while one of his hands left your hip just for two of his fingers to enter your cunt seconds later, your hips buckled against him again, he placed your clit between his teeth and lightly pressed in response. Your legs started shaking when he did that, you had to place a hand over your mouth to not scream. He fingered you faster, curling his fingers into you and hitting your sweet spot.
He continued like this for a while, making a whimpering mess out of you, and thankfully, today he didn't seem to have the need to edge you endlessly until you were begging for release, he needed this as much as you, maybe even more. He was still rubbing against the couch, but he didn't notice he was doing it, he was too occupied getting you to your own high to care for himself at the moment. You were almost there, his fingers replaced his tongue on your clit, rubbing it rapidly. His mouth moved to your entrance, he knew you were close, and he wanted to taste every drop of your release.
You came with a loud moan that was thankfully muffled by your own hand, your vision went white and your legs trembled. Andrew drank you in, letting you ride out your high as he moaned into your pussy, and then you noticed his hips. He was desperately dry humping the couch, what a sight that was, you could tell he wasn't even noticing he was doing it, suddenly his hips buckled repeatedly and he was groaning into your cunt as he drank the last of you, his eyes were closed and his hand that was still grabbing you was doing so in a way that you were surprised it wasn't breaking skin. He'd come, just from eating you out, the thought made you giggle.
He kissed your clit one last time before pulling his head out from between your legs, his hair was a mess and the lower part of his face was glistening with your juices, he was panting heavily. “I- I didn't notice I was-” He said with heavy breaths, but you interrupted before he finished.
“Humping the couch while eating me out?” You asked in a teasing voice. A smirk plastered on your face.
“Yeah,” he laughed, “made a fuckin’ mess.”
“It's not noticeable from here.” You assured him.
“Good,” he leaned closer to you, hovering his body over yours, one hand held him up while the other found your waist. “Tank you for letting me do this, baby.” He kissed you gently, his accent thicker than before.
“Thank you for doing it.” You smiled.
“I love you so much,” he murmured between kisses, “my perfect girl, so fuckin' beautiful.”
“I love you too,” you kissed him back, “I should get dressed though.”
“Hmm, fine, but I'm keeping these until I see you next time.” He said, grabbing your panties from the pile of your clothes from the floor and keeping them in his hand.
“No, you're not, give them back!” You feigned annoyance, thinking he'd give them back.
“Would you rather I take back my shirt, then?”
“What would I wear then? I didn't bring a jacket.”
“Exactly, so these,” he held up your panties again, “are for me.” He placed them in his pocket right after.
“You’re horrible.” You fake pouted.
“You love me.” He grinned while handing you the rest of your clothes.
“You're lucky I do.”
“I know.”
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seenoversundown · 4 months
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I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm
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Warnings: Smut (Oral F receiving, sex sex sex)
Word Count: 1.3k
Andrew x Reader (y/n)
The laughter of our friends echoes down the hall as he guides me further and further away from them. We’re hosting the annual holiday party this year for the first time. It was our third holiday season together but the first one in our new home. 
“They’re going to notice we’re gone, we’re going to get caught,” I say while tugging his hand. I can’t help the fit of giggles that follow. 
“Love, we’re only going to get caught if you’re loud,” Andrew replies, and the heat building in my stomach drops. We continue down the long hallway until we hit the staircase. I’m ready to start tiptoeing up them, trying to remind myself to avoid the squeaky stair halfway up, when Andrew pulls us into the small closet built under the stairs instead, causing me to gasp. 
“This is way too close to everyone else!” I hiss under my breath. 
He laughs while tugging me in further. “We have about ten minutes before Marlow comes looking for me; better make them count.” 
 My protests quickly fail as he attaches his lips to my throat, my ultimate weakness. He pulls me against him as he pushes the door shut with a soft click. I’m holding on to his arms as though they’re life preservers keeping me from drowning in all of him. I feel the low rumble of his laugh as he peppers soft kisses trailing up to my lips. 
As soon as Andrew’s lips touch mine, I feel myself drown. It’s intoxicating as I spiral from our kiss. I let my hands roam over his arms, chest, anything I can touch. It seems as though he feels the same way with the way his hands are pulling my dress up over my thighs. I can feel his fingers slip over the outside of my thong, looping into each side. With one quick movement, he pulls them down and falls to his knees simultaneously. He looks up through his lashes at me, and god, is it a beautiful sight. His pupils are so blown out that I can barely make out the green of his eyes I love so much. I’m breathless looking at how gorgeous this man is. I feel lucky. 
“I’ve been thinking about you all day, love. I need to taste you.” Andrew sounds desperate as he plants kisses on my thighs, almost like he’s waiting for me to permit him.
“Please,” my voice comes out breathless, almost inaudible, but it’s all he needs. He takes his fingers and separates my folds to give me one long swipe of his tongue. I forget our rules, where we are, for a moment, and moan in relief. Finally, my man is where he belongs. 
“You have to stay quiet, love, or I can’t let you finish.” 
My hands instantly go to the back of Andrew’s head. “Sorry, sorry, don’t stop.”
“My needy girl, what am I going to do with you?” He doesn’t give me time to respond as he expertly finds my clit. I’m focusing hard on not making a sound, but I can’t help the whimper that comes out of me when he inserts a single finger. The scrape of his beard on the inside of my thighs is deliciously painful. 
“More, please give me more.” I’m close, something that always happens fast with him. I feel him chuckle, which just makes my clit hum in pleasure, but he complies. I feel the second finger enter me, and I slowly become untethered. My hands are lost in his unruly curls as I hold him against me, chasing my release. His fingers curl inside of me, and I come entirely undone. It’s hard to remember to stay quiet when he makes me feel this good. When he’s sure I’ve come down, he rises from his place on his knees. 
“I need to feel you,” Andrew whispers against my ear as he turns me around. I hear the zipper of his pants before he shrugs them down his thighs. He places the crown of his cock against my entrance, and I can’t help but push up against it; the anticipation is unbearable. 
“My desperate girl can’t wait for me, can she?” My head shakes in response as I hear him tsk behind me. “You know the rules, babe. Use your words.” He slowly removes his cock so he isn’t touching me anymore. 
“Please, please. I need you. I can’t wait.” He’s right, I am desperate for him. 
I hear Andrew’s low chuckle behind me as he repositions himself at my entrance. He doesn’t give me any warning at all before he’s bottoming out inside of me. The mix of our moans fills the tiny closeted space while he brings up a hand to my neck. With his hand slightly tightening on my throat and the other gripped onto my hip, he starts to thrust. 
“You’re so wet for me. Just for me. God, I love being inside you.” Andrew murmurs in my ear. I feel myself melting for him. I press my ass back and spread my legs even more, trying to get as much of him as I can. 
“You need this too, don’t you, babe? My naughty girl, I love when she comes out to play.” I lightly moan in response to his words when his hand gives a warning squeeze around my throat. 
“My naughty girl still needs to be quiet. Wouldn’t want to be found, would we?” 
“No, sorry, please.” My breath hitches in my throat as Andrew thrusts into me at a steady pace. His hand slowly travels up my side as his languid thrusts continue until he reaches the peak of my breast. My nipple is hard, and I need more from him. I don’t have to say anything as he pinches my nipple and gives me the pressure I am desperately searching for. 
“You feel so good, pleasedon’tstop.” I barely recognize my own voice anymore. I love when sex with Andrew sends me into another dimension. 
“Let me feel you come, love, come undone for me.” My orgasm is right on the surface as I listen to his words, but once his hand deserts my breast and makes its way to my clit I am entirely done for. 
It’s hard not to whimper as I come on Andrew’s cock, and it’s hard not to moan when I feel him release inside of me. It feels as though there’s no more air in this closet, just Andrew and I. He stays behind me for a moment, maybe two, just holding me in our post-coital bliss. When he’s ready, he finally pulls out of me, and I can’t help but whimper at the empty feeling. 
Andrew moves around me and cleans me up with my discarded panties. After  he puts them on the shelf out of view, “I’ll come back for these when everyone leaves.” He says as he presses a kiss to my temple. 
“You better not forget them, I swear, Andrew.” 
“Swear what?” He presses a kiss to my lips. “I know how to get on your good side, love. I’m not worried.” He laughs that glorious laugh; it’s the best sound I’ve ever heard. He unlocks the closet door and looks back at me, “ready to go back?” 
“Do I look okay?” I ask as I smooth my dress back out, trying to look as normal as possible. Andrew takes my wrists and stops my movements. 
“You, my love, are ethereal.” A single kiss to my forehead. “Let’s go.” 
As we walk back down the hallway , the voices get louder and louder, seemingly right on time; a small pair of footsteps is running towards us. 
“Uncle Annndreeeewww!!” Marlow bellows. “I’ve been looking for you! Have you been playing hide and seek?” She erupts into a fit of giggles as Andrew lifts her above his head. 
“Absolutely was, Mar. Good job! You found us.” 
I can’t help but laugh behind them as we walk into our living room to be greeted by everyone else. 
“You two were gone for quite some time.” Our friend calls from the other side of the room. 
Andrew’s quick to cover Marlow’s ears before he responds. “You know me, I would never worship and tell.”
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arlh0e · 3 months
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I'm not sure if you're taking requests but I figured I'd try. I've had the idea of Hozier/Andrew finding out you have an oral fixation/kink and using against you until you're a brain dead mess. I came to Tumblr to see if I could find anything but it surprisingly doesn't have a ton of Hozier fics considering he's basically everyone's dream man.
Anyway, thank you so much for reading this!!
Moments silence (common tongue)
Oh my god I love this idea! Im so glad Ive been getting smut requests because Im relatively new to smut writing so I adore being able to practice. My apologies in advance if this is super awkward to read bc I was having trouble trying to figure out how to describe homies dick. It also may turn out to be a little long, I am a whore for sucking dick so pardon me if I get excited and carried away.
Rating: Hozier x reader, graphic smut, hard dom! Andrew, oral m! And fem! Receiving, face fucking, the sloppiest of sloppy blowjobs, oral fixation, smut under the cut, general filth, plotless smut, reassurance, begging, choking, help I need him
You were squirming beneath him, his tongue and fingers working their usual magic.
He loved going down on you, your pleasure was his top priority every time that he took you to bed, he absolutely loved making you feel good.
You hadn’t told him that you had a similar affinity with giving him the same pleasure. Of course, he knew you loved the act of giving, but to what extent he wasn’t fully aware of.
If you were honest, it was almost concerning how constantly you were thinking about the feeling of your mouth around him. It made you so wet that you had ruined more pairs of underwear than you were comfortable admitting. He made your mouth water and your mind go nearly completely blank with anything other than want for him.
You feel his fingers move from inside of you, his head lifting to meet your eyes. His pupils are dilated and you can see your arousal covering his lips. He looked utterly enchanting.
His hand moves toward your bottom lip, tapping it softly twice. “Open.” His voice is deeper than normal and his accent has thickened. You opened your mouth and let him push his fingers into your mouth, tasting yourself on his skin. You find yourself sucking gently on his fingers, moving your tongue across his digits, wishing it were his cock in your mouth instead.
You let out a moan as his fingers leave your mouth, not even processing the words you were saying. “If you don’t let me suck your dick right now I may just lose my mind.” Your voice was coming out in gasps and moans, you were desperate, bordering on feral.
He quirked a brow at you, smiling smugly down at you. “Oh, is that right?” He presses a gentle kiss to your lips, pulling away just slightly so that you could still feel his breath across your face, your noses were still touching. “I was wondering when you were going to tell me about this little fixation you have with putting your mouth on me.” He chuckled darkly, looking at you through hooded eyes.
You couldn’t even say you were surprised at this revelation. Of course he knew. You expected nothing less, and honestly you hadn’t exactly been secretive about it, you hadn’t ever tried to hide it, so of course he knew.
He moved his head away from yours, his fingers coming to your chin, squeezing it gently. “I want you to beg.” His tone was serious, leaving no room to argue.
Your gaze shifted around the room, your eyes darting everywhere but his face as you felt the blush creep onto your face through your neck. You weren’t necessarily embarrassed, but you hadn’t ever told anyone about this particular interest of yours. The idea that he not only kew but was asking you to beg for it was entirely foreign to you. It made you squirm a bit beneath him.
“Ah ah.” He pulls a bit on your chin, forcing you to look back at him. “Eyes on me. Use your words.” His gaze was intense but encouraging, loving. He wanted to hear you ask nicely, but he also wanted you to feel comfortable. You knew he wouldn’t push you to do anything you didn’t want to.
“Please?” You looked up at him with wide eyes, batted your eyelashes just a little bit. “Pretty, pretty please?”
He chuckled a bit, smiling down at you, his mask cracking just a little bit. “With a cherry on top?” You loved the way he could go from this powerful, dominant being to his normal goofy self like this sometimes.
“Of a most delicious sundae.” You smile back at him, sticking your tongue out for a half second.
He just kept smiling down at you, his hold on your chin still firm. “Well I cant argue with that.” He stands, still clothed from the waist down, pulling you up to sit before him. Your hands stayed folded in your lap as you looked at him, standing before you, hands at his sides. “Go ahead, love.”
You slowly slip off the side of the bed and onto your knees in front of him. You could see the outline of his erection through his jeans, and you wondered for a second if that was uncomfortable. Surely it had to be.
You move your hands to fiddle with the button on his pants, frantically trying to undo the button and zipper. You always had a bit of trouble getting his hand pants all the way off of him, with how long his legs were, you couldn’t quite get them off, he always had to help you.
You took a moment to look at him, completely bare before you. He was beautiful, like a divine being come down to earth, and he was all yours.
You raise one hand to wrap it gently around his shaft while you used your tongue to wipe to bead of precum from his tip. The taste was salty and a bit bitter, but one you enjoyed nonetheless.
You carefully took him into your mouth, just a little bit at first, working up the nerve to try to go farther, moving slowly at first focusing on using your tongue to further his pleasure, hollowing your cheeks around him as you bobbed your head up and down along his length.
His hand flew to the back of your head, taking a fist full of your hair as his head leaned back and he let out a deep groan. He gently pushed on the back of your head, urging you to take him deeper and deeper.
You loved hearing the noises you could illicit from him, the way he gasped and tugged on your hair when you would moan in satisfaction around him, and you especially loved the louder sounds he would make for you, the way he would tell you how good you were doing and how good he felt. He was so vocal, and every word, noise, and gasp he made, pulled you in more.
“Fuck, you’re doing so good baby.” His voice was low and ever encouraging as he moved his hands through your hair, guiding your head along his cock at a relentless pace. You gagged, taking him farther than you had thought you were capable of.
You felt tears prickling your eyes as he kept bottoming out in the back of your throat, doing your best to keep your mouth closed but failing quite miserably as you continued gagging on him.
You found yourself struggling slightly to breathe between the saliva that was running down your chin and the pace at which he was hitting the back of your throat.
You moved your hand to tap frantically against his abdomen, wordlessly asking for a break to take a breath. After a few more thrusts, he backs away, his hands still in your hair, but granting you a break as he pulls gently on your hair to angle your head upward meeting his lips with yours.
You smile into the kiss, it was gentle, loving but urgent and nothing short of demanding. You moan into his lips, still smiling. As he pulls away, he makes a point out of observing the grin playing at your lips.
“So eager to please, darling.” He smiles darkly back at you, loosening his grip on your hair. He places another peck to your lips, then your forehead. “Do you want some more?” His gaze softened, looking down at you, smoothing your hair, a hint of concern in his eyes. He was making sure you were okay, checking in to make sure he wasn’t going too far or making you uncomfortable.
You nodded back at him, your smile not even faltering for a second. “Yes, please.” Your voice was raw, it felt like you had swallowed sand paper, and your voice cracked, but you didn’t even care. You wanted more of him. You wanted him to use you for his pleasure until you couldn’t speak or think or even breathe, and you were already halfway there.
You rose up higher on your knees, moving your hands to his hips, pulling him closer to you in an attempt to take him back into your mouth. You were met instead with a hand at the base of your neck, stopping you. You looked up at him with pleading eyes, begging him to let you have what you wanted.
He chuckled and moved his fingers to hold your chin once again, this time pulling you to your feet in front of him. “Uh uh. Lay down.” He removes his hand from your chin roughly, causing you to lose your balance and fall back onto the bed.
He makes his way around the bed to the side closest to your head, leaning over you, placing yet another kiss on your lips. “If you want me to stop, lap twice on my right thigh, alright?” You nod quickly, understanding where this is going, and quite eagerly scoot yourself to the end of the bed, your head dangling upside down over the side, your mouth falling open to welcome him.
He chuckles at your enthusiasm, moving his hands to rest on either side of your shoulders, bending himself over you as he pushes himself back into your mouth, deeper than before.
You let out a moan as the same time you hear him groan from over you. “Jesus fucking christ, love.” He curses, thrusting his hips into your mouth once again, starting slow and gradually picking up the pace.
He moves his hands to wrap around your neck, feeling himself move inside your throat. You were breathless, gasping in between his thrusts, chocking on his cock as well as your own saliva, gagging as he used you. Your hands were holding the backs of his thighs, pulling him closer to you, but also to ground yourself.
You were loving every moment of this. Relishing in the moment and the fact that you could deliver pleasure to him this way. You were utterly enchanted by him, his sounds, the curses he let out, the feeling of him moving in and out of your throat, you couldn’t think of any reason as to why you hadn’t told him this earlier.
With every second you could feel him coming closer, you also felt yourself becoming less and less able to think of anything but him. You were all but mindless, unable to form a single coherent thought, only embellishing in the feeling of his muscles, tensing all as once and then relaxing.
You tasted that same, familiar salty taste as you heard him breathlessly curse one final time before pulling out of your mouth and kneeling down next to your head.
You swallowed before offering him a dopey smile, still not fully in your right mind, high off the feeling of being useful to him.
He smiles back, standing up once again, this time to move you toward the pillows at the head of the bed, before laying himself next to you and gathering you in his arms.
“I take it we’ll be doing that again?” He smiles down at you and places a kiss to your forehead.
“Yes. A lot.” You giggle as you curl up into his arms, closing your eyes and letting his arms completely encase your frame.
Dom Andrew is my favorite Andrew to write tbh. Thank you for the request, hope you enjoyed it <3
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sunlight-fics · 11 days
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I WANT/NEED TO GIVE THIS MAN A HUG SO FUCKING BAD ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY
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Another Layer of In-Yun Pt 2
Pairing: Andrew Hozier-Byrne x fem!reader
Summary: A slow morning nestled in each other’s arms, turns into Andrew ravishing you.
Pt 2 of Another Layer on In-Yun
Content Warming: MDNI, smut, oral fem!receiving, language, confessions of love, fluffy smut, dom! Andrew, slight praise kink (barely)
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“I’m sorry that was a bad joke, I hope you don’t take back the I love you’s” you laugh. His voice still has that soft edge to it. He laughs along with you as he leans closer, his lips grazing yours again. 
“It’s okay, I’m a sucker for the shitty puns you make. If anything, it makes me love you that much more.” He kisses you again, his lips lingering on yours as he pulls away. His eyes close, and he smiles as he looks at you, his voice still soft and warm. As you both feel the kiss deepen, his  hand traces along your shoulder, down to your collar bone, his voice like treacle as he speaks. “Is it just me, or are you the most gorgeous girl in the entire universe?” He smiles softly as he tilts his head gently, his eyes open slightly. His lips linger on yours for a moment before pulling away. “Just you” you whisper. He chuckles, his voice still low and soft “Don’t be silly, honey. Your beauty is unmatched… you put goddesses to shame” He kisses your forehead, his other hand caressing your waist. You can feel his breath against your skin. He moves his lips down to your neck and kisses you along the line of your jaw, running his hand through your hair again. “So pretty”. You grab his hair pulling him closer into your neck as he nips at the exposed skin, leaving marks. His voice takes on a deep, sensual tone as his lips bite you along your jaw. He move lower and lower along the side of your face. His voice is a whisper, his breath sending chills down your spine “You like that, honey?” He speaks softly, the feeling of his breath tickling your neck sends goosebumps up it. 
“God yeah” you moan out.
His drips with command getting hoarser when he speaks, as his kisses become more intense. His breathing is gets faster as one hand grabs your waist and the other is running through your hair “Such a great reaction... you’re so sensitive... and so pretty... Do you enjoy that?” His voice is a low whisper as he lets out a long exhale while biting you on the neck again.
“Ah” you whimper slightly biting you li. His voice softens as he hears your reaction, his lips trail down your neck until they reach your collar bone. His hands are moving along your body now, one on your lower back and the other sliding up your torso. He could feel himself straining against the confines of pants now, your reactions only fuelling his desire. “Shhh… just enjoy it. I want to treat you like the goddess you are. I want you to tell me what you want, honey? Can you do that? Just be a good girl and let me do my work.” His hand snakes between your bodies pressing against each others moving down to your collar bone. He removes the T-shirt of his you were wearing from last night, exposing your chest to him.  He cups your breast in one hand slowly rolling the peak of you nipple, as the skin dimples under his touch. He lowers his head catching the other breast between his lip, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. His other hand massaged the curve of your breast at an agonisingly slow pace. 
As the words die in your throat, your voice is replaced by a soft moan. The feeling of his hands sliding down your body makes you tremble slightly. He speaks again with his lower, sensual voice as he sucks on your skin “Damn… can’t get enough of me can you, love”
“Fuck. Yes.” You respond more so in a moan than in coherent words as you feel him move further down, his lips outlining the curves of your chest and your expanded ribcage. 
Your breath catches as his lips move down along your stomach, his hands trailing along your sides. Your whole body feels like a ball of fire, like every single inch of your skin is on a slow, steady burn. You try to hold back your breathing as he whispers along your torso “You’re so sexy, honey… So beautiful… Do you like what I’m doing to you?”
“Yes please don’t stop”
He chuckles at your words, slowly kidding the lining of your parties. He hooks one finger to their side, skilfully peeling them of. You lay in front of him with your core revealed, he stops for a second to take in the sight of how ready you are for him. “Ambrosia” he moans before delving show tongue in your folds. Licking a bold stripe across your vulva. As his tongue moves, his breathing slows down, and each exhale feels like it sends goosebumps along your skin. he moves you so now you’re trapped underneath him, his tall farm covering your body as his head moved  away from your heated arousal back to your torso, kissing and nipping at your hip and his hands massage the flesh of your ass.
As he pins you under him, your whole body feels like it’s melting underneath. His tongue continues exploring along your skin, the erection he had been harbouring had grown to it’s full length trying to relive itself by holding onto the the sliver of friction is felt every time you moved you legs underneath his weight. With each kiss, each nip, each lick, it’s like your skin is being kissed by fire. Your body is completely surrounded by his warmth, and your breath gets heavier. You felt him suck your pubic bone, the need to feel his touch again clouding all your senses.
“Andrew baby, pleaseeee”
His breath catches a bit when you beg him. Your voice is a whisper, even though he can hear every word. His voice takes on that sensual edge again as he smiles at you. 
“Please what, honey?”
“I need you there” you moan.
His breath slows again when you moan, " youneed me where, honey?" You bite your lip at his incessant teasing.
“Need you to taste me”
He laughs at how desperate you’re becoming, his voice still low and sensual as he speaks “You’re so eager, hm? Can’t keep my baby waiting, can I?” 
His hand reaches up again to trace gentle languid circles on your inner thigh, inching up slowly. You feel his hot breath against your exposed vulva, a welcome change from the cold air that it had been exposed to since he moved his head away. You feel an involuntary shiver travel down your spine  to shake a little, mouth agape in anticipation. Your eyes flutter shut.
“Hey look at me while I taste you, yeah?” he says. You open your eyes to the sight of him between your legs. His hair wild and his unwavering green eyes on yours. He picks up your legs and places them over his shoulder to get better access. He smiles at you again, as you feel your throat get dry and your heart is beat at an intense pace.
He lowers his head licking another bold stripe across your arousal, collecting your juices along his tongue. You feel yourself clench around nothing at the sensation. You feel his lips latch on to your clit and flicking it with his tongue, sending jolts through your body. He wraps his lips around it as he sucks it gently bringing his other hand to tease your tight entrance. You can feel yourself getting wetter under his touch.
You hands tug at his hair bringing him closer, your eyes still open looking down at him.
And before you can process all the electric signals, you suddenly feel full as he slips one finger inside you, collecting the juices and spreading them over your vulva as he doesn’t let his attention waver from your clit.
He slowly moves his face down as he licks the hole of your entrance. Tasting your arousal on his tongue as his nose rubs against your sensitive bundle of nerves. The combined stimulation already starts threatening to take over. 
“Fuck Andrewwww” you let out a long breathy whimper as he hooks another finger inside of you.
“So good for me, my love. So wet. So taught” he whispers against your core looking up at you through hooded eyes.
He can feel himself getting closer to the edge as well, his hips humping against the mattress, trying to get some relief.
 You. look down at the sight of him in between your legs, finger pumping in and out of you slowly with his tongue flicking against your clit. You feel his bulge pressing up on your leg, he was just as wound up as you were.
“Please Andrew. I need you. Faster” you manage to string together a sentence. 
As you beg him to go faster, he looks up at you with a playful grin, his eyes not closing, a grin on his face. “You would rather get what you want now, rather than wait a little longer for it? A little patience, honey, and you’ll be satisfied.” His voice is soft but full of that teasing edge.
“Please I’m so close baby please” your head rolls back and your back arches off the mattress to feel his touch again.
A grin spreads across his face as he listens to you beg him, as he replies "So close? You're so close to what, darling? I need you to tell me, you promised didn’t you?”
“Need to come on your hand Andrew please, fuck”
“Yeah? Well then, I can’t say no to your pretty face. Always so perfect for me, yeah?” he pushes in another finger into you, as both his fingers pump in out of you and curl upwards slowly to brush against your g spot over and over again your mind starts to blank at his touch? With each pump
he curves his fingers more inside of you brushing over the tender spot again and again as his eyes stare up at your face contorted in pleasure.
He kisses your neglected clit and flicks the bud a few times. 
The sudden sensation is what ultimately catapults you off the edge. Wave after wave, your orgasm washes over. You feel your body tremble under the ecstasy of it.
He feels your walks clench against his finger and then French them in your come. Seeing you so blissfully fucked out is what sets him off. He feels the blood rushing through his cock finally reaching the pinnacle and then he comes too, just looking at you. Without you even touching him. 
“Fuckkkk” he moans. He loses himself for a second in a wave of unbridled pleasure. But he still pumps his finger into you, helping you ride through your own orgasm. Your legs spasm around his head, as he uses his free hand to draw comforting circles over your thigh to stabilise you.
“Shh, so perfect for me, yeah sweetheart? Got me wrapped around your finger. Or rather the other way around” he chuckles and whispers sweet nothings into you core as you come down from your high. He takes out his finger from inside of, the sudden feeling of nothingness down there sends a shiver down your spine. You feel him coming up planting kisses along your jaw as he does. 
His voice still carries a tone of that playfulness. He pulls you up, your face level with his, his hands cupping your cheeks “Such a good girl, such a pretty one. You really are my little star, you know that?”
You move up to capture his lips in a searing kiss to express your gratitude, you can taste yourself on his tongue. You tangle yourself hand in his hair, wanting to never let him go. 
As you both pull away for air he brings his two fingers covered in your juices to his mouth as he slowly kicks it off taking in the last of your flavour?
Your voice is a whisper as you watch him, your breath catching at the sight. He finishes licking his fingers clean, a seductive smirk on his face. His voice is still just a whisper as he leans closer to you, his hands running down your thighs to pull you close.
“ Mmmm like I said, ambrosia. You wanna taste how sweet you are, my love?” he whispers as you nod your head, he releases his fingers from his mouth with a lewd pop and brings them to yours. You open up catching his fingers around your lips sucking them gently, your tongue stroking giants his digits. 
His voice catches when you suck his fingers, and he bites his lip as he watches you. His eyes are glued to yours as you do, and there’s a soft tremble to his voice as he speaks again “God, you’re amazing… you taste like nectar, I don’t think I could ever get enough.”
You release his fingers with another pop. 
“Only for you, my love” you whisper against his lips, bumping your nose to his. He strokes your face gently and kisses you gently ast first, but you deepen the kiss to have access to his whole mouth. You feel like you’ve never been more alive than you are right now. He pulls away, his voice carrying a soft, deep tone when he speaks again “My god…”
“Andrew, that felt so good. Thank you” whisper against his lips as you stare into his eyes. 
He smiles at you, his voice taking on that deeper tone again, and he runs his fingers through your hair as he pulls you close again, his voice still a whisper “I could spend the rest of my life pleasing you. Every life after this. I could spend every second of it making sure you’re pleased by me.”
“I love you so much, baby” he whisper against his lips. Content and satiated. 
“I love you too. Beyond belief.”
I hope you guys enjoyed this, like I said it’s first time writing something and putting it out for other’s to see so I hope this was okay. Requests are open if you have suggestions, or just wanna talk.
Thanks for reading! <333
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daddyhausen · 24 days
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。 ・ : * ˚ : ✧ 。 「 PEARL ROSARY 」 。 ・ : * ˚ : ✧ 。
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「 MASTERLISTS 」 | 「 MUSICIAN/ BANDS MASTERLIST 」 | 「 HOZIER MASTERLIST 」
「 COMMISION INFO 」 | 「 LIKE MY WORK? BUY ME A COFFEE — KOFI — DXDDYHXUSEN 」
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「 SUMMARY 」 — blowjobs in the backseat of andrew’s car in the church car park
「 WARNINGS 」 — 18+, [ MINORS DNI ], mentions of religious procecussion, catholic!reader x catholic!hozier, oral sex [ male recieving ], facials, cumshot male orgasm
「 WORD COUNT 」 — 987
「 PAIRING 」 — fem!reader x hozier
「 GENRE 」 — smut
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「 TAGLIST 」 — @thewrestlingbitch @omg-im-such-a-masochist @bayleymania @wardlow @alexisquinnlee-bc @sammiejane22 @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @omegasluvbot @melissahausen @writtingrose @drummergrl1310 @unoficialy-married-to-ace-austin @bonehead-playz @legit9thlunaticwarrior @crowleysqueenofhell @romanreigns-supreme @janetreader @thenerdybaker523 @sunshinevirus @nicoleveno14 @rubyred1980 @harmshake @igncrxntripley @ripleyswhore @embermdk @thepalaceofmelanie @seeingstarks @kennysbadkitten @darkangelchronicles @ripleyswife @selena-tyler-564 @alyyaanna @nightmare-viper
「 COMMENT IF YOU WANT TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST 」
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the night had always brought peace in your life. it was the one time where you felt you could be your most authentic self, free from the pressures of the church, fromm the llering eyes of parishioners, of their judgemental stares and gossip. not that you were one to even stir any trouble or anything that would warrant their stares. why you, the church girl, the innocent doe with rosery in one and and veil shielding your eyes from any scrutiny.
yet, they still stare, still shun you for your love. despite your devotion to christ, your devotion to andrew outweighed it in thousands. he was the first to not judge, to not stare with glaring hate in your direction, but affection, the muddy green of his irises bore nothing but adoration. his hands gentle in their caresses of your skin, even in passing in the pews, always respectful, always gentle.
even now, positioned on your knees as you were so commonly used to in the church pews, however your lord was not looking down on you with praise, for in his place was andrew,. mouth agape with shallow breaths, as your lips worked magic around him. he knew the church would shame him, you moreso. for without the sanctity of marriage the two of you were engaging in nothing but common sin, the two of you knew that, however, the feeling would not stop, nor did you want it to.
with your lips wrapped around andrew, taking him inch by inch as he delved deeper into sin, fingers tightening in the soft strands of your hair, entangling him like a wicked serpent.
“oh darlin’” he hummed, head thrown back in a fit of pleasure. he adored it. he adored you. the mossy green irises flickered down at you every so often, watching as you swallowed his length with a soft mumble and a moan, avoiding his gaze with a heated tint rising on your cheeks
his hand would fall from your hair, smoothing down your cheek, trailing down your jawline until gingerly resting under your chin, tilting up your head ever so slightly to meet his eyes. He bore adoration and love for you, for this pleasure he was so happy and grateful to receive from you. in this moment you did not care what the church was to think, in this moment your lord held no power over you. andrew;s completely overshadows any presence your lord ever had.
the moonlight, hidden through cracks in the treeline caressed his skin so wonderfully, a glossy sheen of sweat and rain reflected off his skin and through the windows, he looked ethereal bathed in the moonlight, the harsh shadows of night obscuring his features aside from his lips and the tip of his nose whenever he’d let out a pleasured moan.
how he’d throw his head back, lips parting with a moan as you could see the bob of his adam’s apple ripple with his throat as the euphoric sound pared his lips. you’d sink your lips lower around him, feeling him nestle comfortably in the back of your throat, his cock throbbing against the flat of your tongue on the verge of release
“darlin’ please i…i’m so close”
his teeth gritted, grinding together as pleasure courses through him. as your cheeks hollowed, drawing him in deeper, taking all he had to offer.
“oh fuck-” he pulled out with a soft grunt.
his cum adored your face and neck, pearlescent under the moonlight. the sight only accentuated your beauty even in such a state of undress, you looked like an angel, sent down from heaven just for him. he couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit guilty for corrupting such a beautiful, innocent creature such as yourself. he couldn’t bare to think of the scrutiny you’d face if the church were to ever find out. Even if they were, andrew would not allow them to shame you, for he would bare the brunt of it to save you from ridicule, save you from the jeers and jusdgement.
“c’mere, love…” he pulled you from the floor, gingerly placinging you into his lap, his softening cock prodding the back of your thigh with dull pulses. the familiar irish twang of his voice echoed in your ears, accompanied by a subtle, content groan that rumbled in his chest.
his chin resting upon yours, silence befell the both of your as your breathing started to shallow, content in listening to the rhythmic beating of eachothers hearts. his thumb, docile in it’s movements, prodded at your bottom lip, swiping away the pearlescent streak of his cum from your skin, doing so until your flesh was “pure” to the untrained eye.
“what if they find out about us?” your voice barely above a whisper, a mere squeak like that of a field mouse.
“hmm?” andrew hummed. not so much that he wasn’t listening, moreso his voice was hoarse from pleasured moans. his hand wrapped around your thigh with a protective grip, thumb smoothing across the skin in gentle circles.
“the church? what if they find out about us?” you reiterated, repeating you question as if he hadn’t heard you the first time, with more desperation and worry to your voice.
“they won’t” he replied simply. almost nonchallontally
“you don’t know that-”
“and how do you know that they will?” his question rhetorical, cutting your sentence off in the process.
it sounded rude although that was defintely not his intention. andrew’s jaw tightened for a moment, the protective grip on your thigh still evident. he was contemplating his next words, carefully, evidently. you could see the cogs turning in his head as his eyebrows furrowed, chewing the inside of his cheek in though.
“i will not let them shame us for giving in to our basic instincts.” he responded cautiously, mind still in thought.
“i will not let them shame us for being human”
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nfwmybaby · 1 month
Text
to be alone (with you)
_↷pairing: andrew x reader (tried my best to make reader as gender neutral as possible) ˎˊ˗
_↷word count: 1.3k ˎˊ˗
_↷warnings: cigarettes, making out ? ˎˊ˗
♡┊͙thinking about sharing a cigarette with him!! first fic pls go easy on me 😭
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“I love you too, Andrew. And I love being alone with you as well.” You take a hit of the cigarette you stole from Andy’s right hand. You don’t know how long you stayed in that position for. How long the soft shake of the trees and the quiet of your heart beating played a soundtrack fond to Andrew. He could die, then and there, and he would not care if heaven and hell existed afterwards, because he’d already experienced something greater than heaven— you.
The sound of music and conversations surrounded the house. It carried itself through every hall, every room, only to be let out by the opened windows, and even then you could hear it from a mile away. Thank goodness Andrew’s house was miles away from the rest of civilization.
“Y/N!” A person calls for you, snapping you out of your thoughts, “Andy went to hide away in one of the rooms again!”
Christ sake.
Why had you even accepted the invitation to the outing knowing you would just be put on Andy-watch? As the constant chatter of people were starting to make your skin crawl, you were albeit a little thankful to be given the perfect chance to crawl away. You understood why he would leave his own party, some people started getting way too much. Still, couldn’t he have told you as to where he was going?
“Alright I’ll go find him.”
“Thank you! And tell him Alex is one minute away from leaving if he’s unattached from Andrew any more.”
You joke, “Fucking boyfriends” And with that you walk away, grabbing a plate of brownies before pulling out your phone to open Andrew’s contact up.
The people are looking for you
Are they sending you to look for me again?
Yes.
I come alone.
Baring peace and some brownies, if you let me
🧐
Is it the brownies I like best?
If you mean the ones I make, yes!
Peace offer accepted.
I’m technically outside.
Have fun trying to find me <3
Oh my god you hate to see me
Quite the contrary, I love to see you, especially when you’re all annoyed
I hate you, Andrew John Hozier-Byrne.
Yeah, Y/N M/N L/N, sure you do.
*message disliked by Y/N*
Good god. You were going crazy looking for him with only his vague ass hint. With the opening of his bedroom you were instantly greeted by the smell of cigarettes and a glass slide door revealing the balcony. There sat the person you had just been looking for, his back facing you. As he turned his face to meet you, a sly smirk grew, bringing the cigarette that rested on his left hand to his mouth,
“15 minutes! You had me waiting for you for 15 agonizing minutes.” He pats the empty chair to the right of him, gesturing for you to sit. You oblige, making your way towards him,
“It’s not my fault you didn’t tell me where you were. ‘I’m technically outside’ had me lost and confused.” You rested your brownies next of the ashtray on the table in front of you both,
“Where’s the fun in that? Plus. I am technically outside. And this is, quite literally, my bedroom. Why would I be anywhere else?” He teases.
You scrunch your face, getting more annoyed with him with every breath he takes, “You know, maybe downstairs, at the party you decided to host? You’re so lucky you’re pretty”
“Aw. You think I’m pretty.” He tried to cover it up, but he couldn't, the paleness of his skin was immediately greeted with a soft blush when the words left your mouth.
“Shush now, Andrew. May I please have a hit of your cigarette?”
He thought for a minute, his eyes darting between the cigarette and the soft pleads of your eyes, “You ask so kindly, but I don’t want to share till you confirm you think I’m pretty, you pure feek.” He takes another hit off his cigarette, but before he can exhale away from you, your body finds itself moving without much thought. Your hand softly guides his head back towards you, a shaky exhale being forced out of him as you lean in close enough to practically feel him exhale. The smoke fills the distance between you two, and without breaking eye contact with him (despite his eyes being glued to your lips at this point) you inhale the smoke he exhaled from his last hit.
“I think you’re a total ride.” You say as you guide the hand with the cigarette to your lips.
“Y/N.” The desperation seeped out of the call of your name like a plea. His hand takes back its control despite it unknowingly still on eachother.
You blow out the smoke, “Andrew.”
He watches you closely as you inhale and exhale, “Christ. You’re going to be the death of me.”
“I know, quite romantic, isn't it?”
He laughs, that intoxicating sound that could have fooled you for a siren, “Death by your hand. Put it on my gravestone.”
You two laugh at the thought for a minute, but when the laughter subsided, you’ve come back to the realization his hand still held yours. It felt nice, right, even, like that's where it should always belong. Or maybe it was just the prior drinks you took a short while ago finally catching up and making you crazy. Either way. His hands were soft, a stark difference to the vast amount of guitarists you’ve met with rougher hands. They were also long and slender, cuppings yours with no problem. He must’ve noticed you staring as he switched the hand that held the cigarette to the other. With his now open left hand, it found its way to your waist, tugging you only soft enough to get the message to you. You happily oblige to his unspoken ask. You stood up slowly, taking a step or two before reaching Andrew's chair and then straddling him beneath you, his hand hadn’t left your waist for a second. Even sitting down he was still taller than you.
“You look divine like this, my love. As close to me as can be. Away from the rest of the folks.” He grins that stupid smile you fell in love with long ago. You shake your head at that, leaning in to kiss him. He happily leans towards to meet you halfway. “I love being alone with you. I love you.” He pulls away and buries himself in the crook of your neck.
“I love you too Andrew. And I love being alone with you as well.” You take a hit of the cigarette you stole from Andy’s right hand. You don’t know how long you stayed in that position for. How long the soft shake of the trees and the quiet of your heart beating played a soundtrack fond to Andrew. He could die, then and there, and he would not care if heaven and hell existed afterwards, because he’d already experienced something greater than heaven— you. The sound of your voice had pulled him out of his thoughts like new music to his worn ears, “Andrew. Your stomach was rumbling.” Oh. When had it done that? He wonders. “Here. The brownies I made for you.”
He smiles and thanks you before immediately eating the plate full. Had he been this hungry and hadn’t known it? Oops. Guess he was too distracted by you. You took the last hits of the cigarette as it reached its end, putting it down on the ashtray, returning back to watch Andrew finish the brownies. You place your hand against his cheek and rub the crumbs off the corners of his mouth. His eyes turn soft with a small pleading look on them as your thumb stayed still on his lip. Placing a delicate kiss on your thumb, "Kiss me, please baby?"
You giggle, happily agreeing and leaning in to kiss him. The grip he had on you tightened. Even more when you went to pull away, “As much as I love being alone with you, Alex threatened to leave if he wasn't reattached to you.” You place a small pecks on the corners of his lips. He smiles at what you had said and done, loosening his grip just a bit,
“Can you promise me I have you the rest of the night?” He burrows his head back into your neck.
“I promise you I won’t leave your side.” You reassure him as your hands play with the curls of his hair.
You hadn't thought it was possible, but he had melted more into you, "Thank you for everything you do for me, Y/N" He murmurs softly into the skin of where your neck and collarbone met.
"You know you don't have to thank me for anything, Andy." He starts to slowly rock you both from the left to right, his arms around your waist, tight to make sure you don't loose balance and fall. And because he wanted to be in the comfort of your arms for longer, milking the feeling as much as possible.
"No. I'll spend the rest of our lives thanking you for everything you do. I'll love you for anything and everything." He finally leaves the comfort of your neck, pulling you in to kiss you again. You could feel him pour every emotion out to you in that minute.
You understood him. He understood you. That’s how well you two worked, words left unspoken could be heard, and words that were let out were messages received, no matter the phrasing. He wasn’t too happy about rejoining the crowd, but that didn’t matter, not when you kissed him so softly as a promise to what you had said earlier, and especially not when his hand was holding yours. He couldn’t care less as to where he was as long as it was next to you. Though he much preferred being alone with you.
.⋆。⋆☂˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆.
Hope you guys enjoyed !! Please lmk what you think ☻
Also inspired by this version of To Be Alone ^^
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padfootagain · 4 months
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When We Were Lying
Hi! Here is another Hozier fic! Had a lot of fun with this trope, as always, I hope you’ll like this little story! Tell me what you think!
****
Pairing: Hozier x reader
Warnings: none… a bit of strong language and an awful lot of longing? Fake-dating AU
Summary: Your ex is attending your family gathering for Christmas and there is no way you're going to face that alone. Of course, you drag your best friend into this, and he's too smitten with you to say no when you ask him to pretend to be your boyfriend. Although, the fact that you both have feelings for each other might end up being a problem...
Word Count: 10055
Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist
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“Sorry… what?!”
Andrew was blinking at you. There was something unnerving in his frown and the intensity of his stare, but you had to bear it. After all, you had no other choice.
“You’re the only one I can ask to do this with me…”
“I’m absolutely not doing that!”
“Why not?”
“Why not?! Why not?! Do I really have to answer that question or have you found back your sanity?”
“Andrew…”
“I am not going to lie to your entire family at Christmas just to save your stupid arse!”
“But I said ‘please’…”
“Y/N!”
“Andrew!”
“This is a terrible idea! I’m not doing that!”
He stared at you as if you had lost your mind, and in all fairness, perhaps you had… for a part at least. Why else would you be sitting in your best friend’s comfortable sofa, in the middle of his large and yet welcoming living room, asking him to lie to your family and pretend that you were together? Only for a day though, just for the traditional meal on Christmas, the boring and tedious lunch on the 25th where you exchanged gifts and stabbing remarks with your least favourite members of your family.
Not that you were not used to face this tragedy on your own; if your arse of an uncle had been the only obstacle to overcome this year, you would have emerged with flying colours. But this year was different. It was different, because your cousin Samantha was coming with her boyfriend… aka your ex-boyfriend. The one she had slept with ten months ago. The one who had betrayed you and broken your silly heart. The one you wished you could put laxatives into his drinks, or pierce his tires, or put some very strong pepper into his tea… Something Machiavellian like that…
But as your chances of poisoning his food at the Christmas lunch were limited, you had to settle for plan B. Which was simple enough: convince your best friend to pretend to be madly in love with you, so you would not have to bear any comments from your family about your broken heart and the fact that you had been cheated on by your fucking cousin Samantha… and perhaps, with a bit of luck, you could also make your ex, Craig, jealous.
A brilliant plan, if there was ever any. Only, Andrew didn’t seem to share your optimism.
“You’ve lost it, this time,” he went on, eyes wide, aghast as he slowly shook his head.
You couldn’t blame him for thinking this. Especially given the fact that your feelings for him would probably end up being a problem. But despite your silly little crush on him… who else could you ask such a favour to? The two of you had known each other for years. He was your best friend, you were ready to do anything for him. No one else would accept…
“Andy… I know I’m asking a lot…”
“This will never work. Beyond the fact that this is pure madness, it will never work! Your parents know me! They know we’re not together!”
“Friends get together all the time!”
“No one will believe us. And you know me, I hate… PDA and stuff like that… I can’t… even when it’s real, I struggle with that stuff. I can’t fake it.”
“On the contrary, that’s great! Cause then, we don’t have to act too much like we’re together, and we can just blame it on your well-known aversion for PDA!”
“No. I’m sorry, Y/N, but this time… it’s a no. I’m not doing that. I’m not playing fake-boyfriend for you.”
You heaved a defeated sigh.
“And I thought you would kill for me.”
“I’m a pacifist… a punch across the jaw is the best I can do.”
“Lousy friend.”
“Fuck off! You think you asking me to lie to your entire family is better? Just so you won’t have to hear them complaining about you being single? You think that’s not worse?”
You saw the way his expression saddened when yours did, when the tinge of playfulness left your features. His voice was softer when he spoke again.
“Why is it so unbearable anyway, huh? You’ve forgotten how my mother can be? I’ve got that refrain sang to me all the time too. It’s not so bad.”
You bit on your lip and lowered your gaze before answering, holding back tears that came blurring your vision of Andrew’s soft carpet.
“Craig and Sam will be there. Together.”
You didn’t need to look up at him to know he was clenching his jaw.
“I don’t… I don’t want to have to face that on my own. I’m not sure I can…”
You barely had time to brush a tear away that Andrew was holding you close, arms wrapped tightly around your frame. And you let him pull you even closer, until your ear was pressed against his heart, until he could drop a tender kiss to the top of your head. He heaved a sigh.
“Could you still come? As a friend?” you asked, voice trembling even if you didn’t want it to.
You hated being like this. Fragile. Crying. Not over the betrayal. You wanted to wave a perfect life at your ex so he would see all that he was missing, until he regretted everything. It was petty, but true. Instead, you would be the one sitting in an uncomfortable chair in a couple of weeks, trying not to throw up nor cry while you witnessed your ex and your cousin playing perfect couple…
Andrew heaved a painful sigh.
“I’ll come.”
“Thank you.”
“No, I mean… I’ll do it. The whole crazy plan. I’ll do it. I’ll be your boyfriend for the day.”
You pulled away just enough to look up at him. There were traces of annoyance in his gaze, but a lot of tenderness too as his eyes met yours, hazel irises turning greener in the quiet light of a late afternoon.
“Really?” you asked, voice shy even though you craved for confidence.
“Really. But you’d better make sure that your mother still loves me when you break it to her that we’re not together anymore! I’m not giving up on her amazing lasagnas, not even for you.”
“I have the recipe, you know?”
“Your mother’s taste better.”
“Fucker!”
“Don’t insult me, or I’ll take everything back and let you deal with this bunch of assholes on your own!”
“Sorry!” you quipped, hiding your face into his chest again, and you heard him mumbling some complaints, playing grumpy, but you knew better.
You were smiling as you listened to his low voice lulling you back into a soothed state. You wondered how he did that. How a mere hug and some whispering were all it took to calm you down, to make you feel safe all over again, when you were so damn insecure all the time.
You lost track of your own thoughts when his large hand came to rest on the back of your head, keeping you close.
And you were glad that you could explain a lack of PDA in front of your family, because there was no way for you to survive a whole day with the man you secretly loved holding you like that…
“Do you hate me? For being selfish and dragging you into this?” you asked him, voice muffled by his woollen jumper.
“No,” he shook his head. “No, I don’t hate you. I could never hate you.”
“Even if I called you to get rid of a body with me?”
“Erm… As long as I’m not the one cutting it into pieces.”
You both let out a chuckle.
“I’ll make sure to stain your carpet with the blood of my victims.”
“Now, that would make me hate you, for sure.”
“I knew you’d choose your carpet over me.”
“Yeah, but what a carpet it is!”
“It doesn’t make you lasagna though…”
“I only like your mam’s.”
You smiled, but remained quiet. You were serious again when your voice broke the comfortable silence that had settled over your two entwined frames.
“Seriously, though… I’m sorry I’m asking you this. I just… I just don’t see what else I can do. I don’t think I can stomach seeing the two of them as a happy couple while I’m still… desperately single. A real loser…”
“Stop talking about yourself like that,” he admonished, voice genuinely annoyed. “I hate it when you do that. You’re… you’re amazing, Y/N. More than you realise. And Craig and Samantha are terrible people. So… stop blaming it all on yourself. They can rot in hell.”
“I thought you didn’t believe in heaven and hell.”
“You know what I mean.”
A pause while you smiled, wool tickling your cheek.
“Thank you.”
He rubbed your back, gesture soft, taking his time.
“Don’t mention it.”
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“You owe me so much…”
“I thought you said ‘don’t mention it!’”
“Don’t mention it, my arse…”
You laughed at him, you couldn’t help it. As Andrew and you walked together down the lane leading to your parents’ house, you couldn’t refrain your laughter. Andrew looked nervous… like the day he had met your parents for the first time, years ago.
“Stop acting like they don’t know you. My family adores you.”
“That’s until they learn I’m lying through my teeth.”
“You’re an infamous liar, anyway.”
“Hey!”
He faked outrage, making you laugh even more, and this time, he couldn’t refrain his own smile.
“I can’t believe you’ve convinced me to do this…”
“Me neither. You must have lost your mind, too.”
He opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it, and sealed his lips again. There was something almost sad on his features for a second, and you wanted to ask if he was alright, but you were already in front of the green door.
“You ready?” he asked instead, an encouraging smile adorning his handsome features now, the cold of December making his cheeks and nose redden.
And you had to struggle through missing heartbeats to nod your head. He looked lovely like this, hair in a half-bun, some curls still free, hair tied only to keep the strands away from his face. He was wearing the grey beanie you adored, chin buried in a huge matching scarf…
“We’ll be fine,” he reassured you, all traces of playfulness or annoyance gone from his warm voice.
“Let’s make Craig so jealous he’ll choke over some pudding.”
You both chuckled, and Andrew nodded, lovely crinkles forming at the corner of his eyes as he kept on smiling.
“Sounds like a plan.”
You took a deep breath before knocking.
There was no turning back.
You glimpsed at Andrew one more time as you waited for your mother to come and open the door, and you thought it truly was the worst idea you had ever had, to ask Andrew to do this… Andrew, of all people. If he was the only choice, he also was the worst one. You simply hoped you wouldn’t have to fake too much… because your heart sped up at the mere thought of holding his hand…
What an idiot you were, getting yourself into so much trouble… at what point had you imagined it was a good idea to ask the man you secretly loved to be your fake boyfriend?!
Your thoughts were interrupted though, as your mother finally appeared. You grinned at her as she hurried to give you a hug.
Andrew had barely closed the door behind him that he was receiving a warm hug as well.
“Ha! Andy!” your mother welcomed him, making him laugh. “It’s so good to see you, it’s been too long.”
“It has indeed…”
“And finally! You two came to your senses!”
You frowned, but didn’t have time to ask your mother what she meant. Instead, you were pulled into the whirlwind that was your family.
Andrew remained close to you, and you were not surprised. There were plenty of people gathered in the large living room, several generations together in the warmth of your childhood home, and Andrew wasn’t too good with dealing with so many people. When you turned to him to offer him a gentle smile, one he immediately offered as well, he seemed a little uncomfortable, hands in his pockets as if he didn’t know what to make of his long limbs, head slightly bent, as to appear less tall than he truly was, a desperate attempt at hiding. You couldn’t help but smile at the sight, such a stark contrast with the confident musician he was each time he stepped on a stage.
You introduced him to the members of your family he didn’t know (including your terrible uncle, who didn’t fail to be rude, hence living up to his reputation). And everything was going fine, except perhaps for the uncontrollable burst that sparked through your heart and chest every time you called Andrew your boyfriend. You pushed to the side the longing that washed over you at the thought that you wished the word could be true…
But it wasn’t the right time for such consideration. After years spent as Andrew’s friend while harbouring feelings for him, you had grown amazingly talented at hiding the love that coursed through each of your cells every time you saw him, or heard him, or thought of him…
But that was not the right time for such thoughts. Indeed, a new couple was just entering the room…
… and suddenly everyone was quiet.
Samantha and Craig seemed to not notice the sudden silence, or else they were simply very good at hiding it. You couldn’t control your expression as you winced, turning towards the window.
But you were surprised by Andrew’s touch, as he reached for your hand. Fingers shy at first, barely the ghost of a caress across your knuckles. When you leaned closer, fingers searching for his too, he intertwined them together, and as you turned to him, he gave you the warmest smile. A silent gesture to tell you it would be okay.
You were even more surprised when he pulled you closer, a gentle tug at your joined hands. You had discussed, before coming to your parents’ house, the boundaries you needed to respect for today. Holding hands was okay. Touching arms, hair or a waist was okay. You had not discussed kissing, but you reckoned that it was a clear no. An arm around the other’s shoulders or back was good too.
But now, Andrew was pulling you gently closer until you were settled against his chest, and he bent to softly kiss your hair, lips lingering on the top of your head for several seconds. The gesture was so tender, you had to close your eyes…
And then his lips were gone, leaving behind the quiet sound of a kiss and their warmth. When you opened your eyes again and looked up at him, Andrew was blushing, but he was smiling too. And there was something in the way he was looking at you…
“Y/N! How good to see you!”
You turned towards Samantha, hence interrupting your train of thoughts, perhaps for the better.
You forced a polite smile, but didn’t go as far as to completely hide that you weren’t happy to see her.
“Sam! How are you?”
“Good! I’m good! What about you?”
She only then seemed to notice Andrew’s presence by your side, an impressive performance, given his height and the fact that you were still leaning into his chest…
“Oh, hi! Hmmm… Andrew, is it? I remember you! You’re Y/N’s friend!”
“Boyfriend now, actually,” you corrected her, and you were amused by the look of surprise on her face.
“Oh! Congratulations! Good for you!”
Around the room, conversations had started again, filling up space once more and giving you at least some privacy… although you knew it to be but a relative truth. Your relatives who stood closer to you were probably listening closely, unwilling to lose any crumb of the conversation and drama that might ensue.
Behind Samantha, Craig finally greeted you, more uncomfortable than his girlfriend was. He grew even more uncomfortable when he offered his open hand to Andrew.
“Good to see you again, Andy.”
You hated that Andrew had to let go of your hand to shake Craig’s, but his fingers found yours again as soon as the greeting was over. It was rare to see Andrew with a clearly forced smile on his face, he was generally better at hiding his discomfort, a habit of always being polite.
“Craig,” followed by a nod was the only greeting Andrew gave your ex, and you recognised protectiveness in the way he moved slightly closer to you, placing himself between you and Craig.
And you felt a little guilty for the sense of pride that you got from that gesture, knowing you shouldn’t be reading anything even remotely romantic into it… but then again, you were but human. And humans always liked dreaming…
“How are you two doing?” Craig asked, and you nodded.
“Good, we’re both doing good. You?”
“Oh, we’re great! We’re planning on going for a trip for our anniversary, don’t we, dear?” Samantha went on, turning to her boyfriend, who merely nodded… rightly uncomfortable.
“Amazing!” you managed to get out between gritted teeth.
“And for how long have you two been together, then?” Craig asked, changing the subject quickly.
“A couple of months,” you answered, a detail you and Andrew had agreed on.
“So, it’s still the honeymoon phase, then,” Sam nodded knowingly, although you weren’t sure what kind of knowledge that was…
“It’s pretty new,” you nodded.
“How lovely! But… I thought the two of you were friends,” she went on, acting confused.
“We were,” you confirmed, and when you struggled to continue, it was Andrew’s turn to step in.
“And now we’re more than that.”
The two of you exchanged a smile, and again, you noticed the way he was blushing.
Craig nodded his head, and you saw how he was frowning, the kind of expression he wore when he was upset over something.
“It’s funny that you were friends for so long and then all of a sudden… you decide to be more,” he spoke with a tinge of venom in a tone he tried to turn honeyed.
You looked for an excuse, but Andrew was the one to answer again. And you were taken aback by his words… and even more so by how earnest they sounded, although… although he could only be lying.
“We… we’ve spent a long time tiptoeing around that line. I think… we’ve had feelings for a while for each other. I guess we were simply afraid to lose everything we already had if we gave this a try.”
“And what decided you to give this a try, then?”
“I don’t know. Some courage, I guess.”
“Or an opportunity,” Craig proposed, making you frown. There was an insinuation behind his tone, and you didn’t quite know what to do of it.
Andrew seemed to understand better, judging by the way he clenched his jaw, slightly tightened his hold on your hand. He remained quiet though, refusing to rise to Craig’s challenge.
“These things can take time, you know?” you added, trying to pull the conversation away from the glares Andrew and Craig seemed keen to throw each other, a silent battle of thunder and storms. “Where are you planning that trip of yours?”
It was too easy to centre the conversation back onto Samantha, nothing surpriseing, though, considering her character…
Lucky for you, you were soon called by your mother to help in the kitchen.
Or actually, it was but a limited reprieve you were granted. It took your mother only a couple of minutes to bombard you with questions, while she made you cut some carrots, sunlight streaming on your hands from the window set above the sink as you worked. It enlightened the orange stains that slowly grew across your fingers while you dodged your mother’s queries, struggling to remain calm while lying. You thought you would be better at it, but as you peeled the vegetables, their forms made slippery in your hands, you were losing your footing, feeling increasingly guilty as the lies passed your lips again and again.
A first date in a quiet restaurant.
A piece of carrot thrown in the sink.
A first kiss in front of your door, as a tender goodbye, one that lingered in reluctance to part.
A blade slipping too fast.
No, you were not planning ahead for now, just taking things as they went, as they formed.
No, there was no words of love yet, don’t be ridiculous! It’s only the beginning…
“The beginning!” Your mother scoffed, throwing a potato in the sink, alongside your colourful pieces. “The man has been looking at you like you’ve hung the moon and stars for years! You’ve been stealing glances for so long… I don’t even remember when it started! It’s not the beginning, dear. The two of you have been in love for years. It is only a logical continuation.”
She frowned as she looked at you, finally lifting her gaze from the brown pile of peels.
“You’re okay?”
You were startled by her question.
“Of course! Why wouldn’t I be okay?”
“I don’t know… you seem… almost sad.”
You couldn’t hold her stare, and you fought every bit of instinct in you to avoid recoiling from her touch as your mother, in a sweet gesture, rested her hand on your shoulder.
“Don’t worry yourself over Craig and Samantha. And before you ask, I wasn’t the one who invited them.”
You nodded, as if you were reassured, as if she was right about the cause of your worry, had aimed straight at the knot of your problems.
She hadn’t. And you were perplexed as you realized this too. Because you had thought that seeing your ex and your cousin together would be unbearable, and it was, indeed, a painful sight. But it was hurting your pride more than your heart, a sting at your ego rather than a tear at your soul.
Instead, the images you summoned in a fake reality with Andrew were the ones destroying you. Because these details, these anecdotes, these stories you made up for your mother were ones you genuinely longed for.
A quiet date in a restaurant you loved. A kiss bathed in streetlights. Hands holding that didn’t want to let go…
This was a terrible idea. A terrible… terrible idea…
“Andrew! Come here, lad! Give us a hand with these, would you?”
You felt his presence by your side before his hand appeared in your vision, reaching for a vegetable, getting to work without any protest or arguing. He would lose anyway, against your mother, and he knew it.
You chatted together for a while, conversation smooth and easy, as always with him around. You almost forgot that all of this was fake when Andrew leaned closer, as if he longed for your nearness. You reached for him before you could think, leaning closer as well, until your arms touched as you worked, the ghost of a touch that was enough to set your heart ablaze…
God… this was such a terrible, terrible idea…
You barely noticed your mother as she moved around the kitchen, until she reached for Andrew.
“I’m so happy for you,” she spoke in a smile. “After all this time… I’m glad the two of you have finally worked out all the things that kept you apart.”
She disappeared before you could speak to her, ask her what she meant. When you turned to Andrew though, he was blinking tears away.
“Andy? You’re alright? What’s wrong?” You asked with sudden worry in your voice, but your friend shook his head.
“Nothing. I’m fine. Just… Erm…”
But he grew quiet, shrugged. You tried to guess, but were pretty sure to miss the mark when he reassured you again.
“Is my mother bothering you?”
“No! Of course, not. It’s weird lying to her, that’s all.”
There was something more to it, but Andrew interrupted you before you could question him further.
“Besides… we have another problem. A more important one. That’s why I was looking for you.”
“What is it?”
“Craig doesn’t believe us.”
“What?”
“He pulled me aside and told me he knew we were faking it. That he was going to tell everyone.”
“The son of a bitch!”
“My thoughts, precisely.”
“What did you answer?”
Andrew shrugged.
“That he was being ridiculous.”
“And?”
“That he was merely being jealous over the fact that he had let a woman like you slip between his fingers like a moron.”
You tried to hide the grin that formed on your lips at his praise.
“Nice… going all in on the ‘make him jealous’ wagon, I see…”
He took a moment to answer, voice less confident than his usual tone when he spoke once more.
“Just the truth…”
You ignored his remark, and you didn’t get why the same tinge of sadness made his hazel eyes greener again, the same way they had earlier that day…
“What can we do to convince him?” you asked, eliciting little more than a shrug from your friend.
You heaved a sigh, your carrots now all cut in the sink. Game over…
“Let’s see how all this unfolds,” was your only solution for now.
“And if he tells your family?”
“We’ll see, Andy. We’ll see.”
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The meal was over. The gifts had been given, the kisses and thankful glances had been exchanged. It was time to settle in with some board games, for those willing, while others nibbled on some pastries and chatted in sofas and armchairs. The last remnants of cakes lingered in porcelain plates while coffee, tea and hot chocolate were being served. You laughed when Andrew picked up your warm beverage before you had a chance.
“Are you drinking my cocoa?”
“I’m trying it out. Just to be sure. In case of poison or something like that.”
You both laughed as he took another sip, humming in delight.
“You could have asked for a hot chocolate instead of tea!” you admonished, but didn’t try to take the cup from him, too happy to see him smiling to even think about it.
God, he could steal the entire beverage, as long as he kept on smiling like that… happy, and soft, and welcoming, calling for a smile of your own to answer his…
“Tastes better when it’s yours,” he laughed, all mischief and cheekiness while he looked at you and drank a third sip, a tiny one, just to get on your nerves.
The charm was broken though when one of the children running around bumped into him and made Andrew spill a little bit of chocolate across his chin. You burst into laughter.
“Well, that was… hot,” you teased while Andrew tried to hide his mouth and chin with his hand, looking around for a napkin of some kind. “Literally, I mean. It must be hot. Graciously so.”
“I hate you,” he glowered without any animosity in his gaze, making you laugh harder as you finally handed him one of the paper towels set on the coffee table.
On the other side of the room, people were playing a board game, but you felt better like this. Just you and Andrew chatting around a cocoa, or what was left of it. No one was truly paying attention to you, or so you had thought… among the five people who were casually chatting in small groups around the coffee table, it was easy to notice that all around the room, if gazes were directed towards your small group, it was to stare at Andrew and you.
Was Andrew aware of that scrutiny? Of the gazes fixed upon you?
“You’re okay?” he asked, frowning slightly, and you wished you could ease the crease between his brow with a brush of your thumb.
“Sure. I’m fine. Just… I think people are kind of watching us,” you added in a whisper no one could eavesdrop, leaning closer to him in the process.
He hummed, slowly nodding.
“Yeah, I think we’re kind of… the new thing.”
You bit your lip before making your next request, and you were surprised to notice that his eyes lingered on your mouth until you spoke.
“Is that okay if we act like…?” you left your question suspended in mid-air.
He nodded again, in silence, and there it was again, the flash of pain turning the hazel into full green…
You noticed the sharp intake of breath he took before finally speaking, the way his eyes narrowed just a little, for a second, while he hesitated… but then the words were out all the same, making his pale cheeks turn a bright shade of pink.
“Can I… tug that strand of hair behind your ear?”
You struggled to swallow and nodded, it was your time to be silent, you couldn’t trust your voice.
He was leaning closer when he lifted his arm towards you, shifting to be facing you, both of you sitting on a sofa that was too comfortable and too familiar for you to feel this tensed, almost frightened.
“You’re sure that’s alright?” Andrew asked again, and this time you let out a faint yes along with your nod.
Frightened wasn’t the right word though. You weren’t scared at all, in fact, you felt absolutely safe with Andrew sitting so close to you, your bodies almost touching, but not quite, just far enough to leave you longing to close these gaps. Slowly, his hand was lifted, all the way up to your face, pushing back a loose strand of hair behind your ear. He was staring at you, something that went beyond softness, beyond the usual tenderness his gaze adorned when it fell on you. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, guess what it meant. But then again, his thumb was brushing your cheek, and the ghostly touch made you too dizzy, anyway.
He leaned closer, unbearably closer, until his lips were next to your ear, his fingers moving to hold your face in place, palm cradling your jaw.
“Can I… Can I kiss your cheek?”
You were certain that your heart could not take more of this, of his intoxicating cologne, of the warmth of his skin across yours, of the delicate breath fanning across your ear…
You reached up for something, anything to hold onto, and your fingers met his woollen jumper, attached themselves to it as if holding a safe line.
“Yes, you can,” you answered despite your shaking voice and the fact that you had no air left in your lungs whatsoever.
Your rational brain wanted to remind you that this was not real, that it was all for show… but the world had vanished the second he had leaned closer. No… no, before that. When he had stared at you in this gentle way, when his hand had risen towards your face. You couldn’t even remember that you were at your parents’, in fact, you couldn’t remember your own name. Your entire world was being rewritten because this man was holding you close, a palm cradling your jaw while the other found its way to your waist; because he was moving slowly away, only to come back closer than ever, lips resting on your cheek. You closed your eyes the second his lips found your skin, their warmth coursing through your entire frame it seemed, his beard slightly tickling you, just enough to make it all the more endearing. He lingered there for what anyone would consider too long, but when you thought he was about to pull away, his lips merely hovered above your cheek, close enough for you to feel their warmth still, and the hurried breaths he exhaled. And then he was kissing your cheekbone again, and again, and with each resting of his lips upon you, you tightened your hold on his jumper, your free hand coming to rest right against his heart, in the end…
You both jumped at the sharp sound of something falling, glass breaking. As you turned, you noticed that someone had dropped a glass of water to the floor. Nothing too bad, your father was already heading towards the kitchen to clean up the mess that was made. Craig didn’t have a drink.
Before you could analyse the situation in depth, though, Andrew was turning his attention back onto you, and you had no choice but to look at him again too. You remained perfectly still for a moment, hazel eyes meeting your gaze in an unreadable expression, his hands still on you…
And then you both realised how close you were, how easy it would be to just lean a little further and to close the gap between your lips…
And you pulled away in a jolt, startled by your nearness, like two teenagers caught red-handed by an adult.
Andrew cleared his throat, rubbing his palms on his dark jeans, shifting like he didn’t know what to do with his own body all over again.
“I should… help clean the mess…” you mumbled, stuttering slightly, while Andrew was nodding and humming, averting his gaze.
You did just that, hurrying towards the table and picking up pieces of broken glass while your brain remained stuck on the feeling of Andrew’s beard on your skin, the softness of his lips, the way he held you closer…
Your heart was still pounding, your breath catching in your throat every now and then; in fact, every time you thought about his fingers slipping to your hair…
“Let’s throw all these away, darling,” your mother told you, nodding towards the shards in your palm.
You stood straighter without a word, headed for the kitchen…
… to fall face to face with Craig.
Wonderful…
“Sorry about the glass,” he said, breathless for some reason.
“Oh, you’re the one who broke it? Don’t worry about it, my parents have plenty of those. As long as you didn’t cut yourself…”
“I did, actually.”
You took a closer look, and indeed, he was pouring cold water onto a cut across his thumb. Nothing worth worrying about, but it would be quite painful and bothersome for a few days, still. The cut was long and clean, if not too deep.
You had walked closer to inspect the wound, and you didn’t notice the way he stared at you.
“It’s not too bad, but it must hurt.”
“No, it’s alright. I’m just waiting for it to stop bleeding.”
“You should press something on it, then.”
You handed him a napkin, which he rolled around his finger as he thanked you. You finally noticed that you were alone in the kitchen, that everybody else was still in the living room either chatting or cleaning up the mess Craig had made.
“Actually, I… I wanted to talk to you, just us…”
You silently encouraged him to continue, but you were taken aback at the passion and hurt in his eyes when your two gazes locked together.
“I… Is it serious? With Andrew, I mean?”
“Yeah… yes! Of course, it’s serious. Why?”
He shrugged, but you saw the way he clenched his jaw.
“It’s just… you’ve been friends for years… why now?”
You shrugged, feeling uncomfortable now… and you blamed it on a lie, but you knew it was because of the longing that was stuck in your heart, and had been dormant there for too long for you to count.
“I don’t know… the timing was always wrong. He wasn’t single, I wasn’t single, he was touring, I was busy… we kind of… were never on the same page, you know? We… our lives never managed to align.”
Slowly, Craig nodded.
“But this time, your lives are aligning?”
“Yeah! I mean… we’re both single, both staying in Ireland for more than a couple of weeks… we… we both want the same things.”
“And what is that?”
“What’s what?”
“That ‘thing’. Whatever it is that you want, what is it?”
You struggled to swallow, looking for a lie, an answer, anything to say. And a weight fell on your chest as the earnest answer flashed before you, taking the shape of two hazel eyes, unruly curls, soft-spoken words and an infectious laugh…
You thought you wanted some revenge. To make Craig jealous, for him to regret leaving you… but the truth was, you had wanted another man all along. And you still couldn’t have him. It was only a game of pretence.
What a terrible idea, this whole fake-relationship scheme…
Craig took a step closer to you, bringing your bodies so close, as you looked up at him, he was but a breath away.
“What do you want? Why are you with him? Of all people, why Andrew, and why now? Do you want to know what I think about all this?”
You frowned at his tone, crossing your arms before your chest, a glare starting to cover your features.
“Oh, enlighten me!” you replied with challenge in your voice.
But Craig didn’t back down. He only leant closer.
“I think you’re trying to make me jealous. I think you’re not over us. I think that deep down, you still want me. And you turned to your best friend as a rebound. But you’ll be tired of him in a couple of months.”
You shook your head, but your ex still went on.
“Look, I know that what I did was horrible, okay? I… Samantha was a mistake… but we could still have this. You and I, we… we were great together.”
You scoffed, taking a step back, shaking your head some more in amazement. The guy had balls, you had to give him that, at least.
“A mistake you’re about to celebrate your first anniversary with…” you replied, tone acidic and bearing no regrets for it.
“Y/N…”
“No! I don’t know what you’re trying to do right now, but you’re wrong, that’s for sure. I… you cheated on me! With my cousin! How could you possibly imagine that I would want to give you another chance?!”
He heaved a sigh, and you thought he would give in, but he didn’t, on the contrary. This was only the first round.
“So what? You’re bringing Andrew here and playing perfect couple just to get under my skin? To make me pay? To show me what I’ve lost?”
You looked for something to say, but couldn’t deny the plain truth.
“Because I already know what I’ve lost, okay?” Craig went on, tears shining in his eyes. “I know that. I don’t need you to pretend to be in love with someone else to see that.”
You let out a shaky breath. You could have walked away, but it felt good to let the truth out. A day spent telling nothing but lies, it was a relief to reveal the truth, even if it was but a fragment.
“You’re wrong. I love Andrew. In fact… I’ve loved him for years.”
He frowned at that, but you went on, a tear escaping your eyes that you didn’t even notice flowing down your cheek. You had been lying to yourself for a long time, pretending that all this made sense, that it was alright, that you were happy and content as Andrew’s friend. In truth, you were anything but happy, anything but content. And today, pretending to be his, pretending that he was yours… it only showed you more clearly that this was what you wanted. What you had always wanted. What you couldn’t have, perhaps, but what you needed.
It was a confession spoken to Craig, but made for you.
“I’ve been in love with Andrew for years. I’ve had relationships because… I wanted to forget him. Thought I could. Thought it was nothing but an infatuation, then nothing but a crush, and then nothing but a meaningless unrequited love that I would get over quickly. But the truth is, you were the band-aid, Craig. And he’s the one I’ve always wanted. And you know what? You’re right. Coming here with Andy today I… I wanted to come with him because I didn’t want to have to face you and Samantha on my own. Didn’t want to have to bear everybody’s stares and pity thinking I was the poor victim of a tragedy… And I wanted you to see that I was fine without you. That I deserved better than the way you treated me. That I… That I was worth keeping, and loving. But I… at the end of the day, if this afternoon has shown me anything, it’s that I don’t need you. I don’t want you. And I don’t give two fucks about you and Samantha. So… let’s be cordial, as we must, as you’re still part of the family for as long as you’ll be dating my cousin, but… I’m over you, Craig. I’m over all of this. And if there is one thing I want in this world, it’s Andy.”
Before Craig could say anything, before you could even process his reaction, you were storming out of the room. Or at least, you tried to. Because you had taken but a couple of steps towards the door, when Craig held you back, holding onto your wrist.
“Really? Is that how you feel?” he asked, clearly hurt, but also unmistakably angry. “I don’t believe you.”
“What?”
“I don’t believe you. You and Andy? I don’t believe it. I can’t believe it. You’re faking it. You’re lying now and for what? To hurt me?”
You didn’t say anything, instead, you merely broke free. Walked out of the kitchen, angry and annoyed and not thinking straight but with a decision taken anyway…
“Andy?”
When you looked around, he wasn’t on the sofa anymore.
“Yes?”
You turned around again. He was right there, by the table, wet napkins in hand, as he had clearly been helping cleaning up the mess your ex had made, standing not too far from the door to the kitchen, your mother by his side while everyone was turning towards you.
He frowned slightly as you hurried towards him, making a bee line to reach him, not caring that everyone was staring at the two of you. Instead, you didn’t think, forgot about the world, focused your attention on Andrew and his unruly curls and the confusion in his hazel eyes, and the way his lips slightly parted as you approached. And then, you took his face in your hands, pulled him down and rose to your tiptoes to meet him halfway, and you kissed him.
You crashed your lips against his, nothing graceful in the gesture, but desperation pouring from every inch of you. You were taken aback though, by the quiet huff he let out, your brain finally kicking in again, and thinking that this was crazy, a terrible idea, and more than anything else, highly inappropriate…
… but Andrew quickly recovered from the initial shock, and before you could pull away and profusely apologise, he had dropped the napkins that hit the floor in a thud, and his arms were wrapping around your frame, pulling you to him. You felt his eyelashes brushing your skin as he closed his eyes, leaning into your kiss, moving his lips over yours to compliment your own movements. And if he was more graceful about it, softer than your rushed gesture, he poured such passion into the kiss that your knees grew weak, and you rested your weight on him, leaning into his chest.
It was over too soon, though, interrupted by the sound of someone – probably one of your parents, or your pain of an uncle – clearing their throat. Andrew was the one pulling away, clearing his throat as well as he took a step back, although one of his hands remained at your waist.
He was blushing when you opened your eyes. And you suddenly wanted to leave. To just go and disappear and pretend like you had not broken the best friendship you had ever had and that the man you loved would not hate you from now on for kissing him like that and that you had not humiliated yourself in front of your entire family…
But as you were about to speak, Craig was hissing from somewhere behind Andrew, making him turn around. Before his attention was pulled away from you, you noted the way Andrew was looking at you. Intensely, a little stunned too, like he wasn’t sure that it had happened, that you had truly kissed him, and yet, like he was searching for answers in your eyes…
But then he turned to face Craig. He had barely turned towards him, though, that your ex was grabbing Andrew by the collar, and pushing him against the nearest wall, Andrew’s hand leaving its resting spot on your hip in the process.
“YOU SON OF A BITCH!” Craig shouted, the whole room too stunned to react while Andrew’s back collided with the wall, a hollow sound ensuing and making a couple of framed pictures shake with the strength of the impact.
“Get off me!” Andrew merely replied through his teeth, struggling to break free, but fighting had never been his strong suit…
“You fucking BASTARD!”
“Craig!”
The first people were finally reacting, hurrying to pull your ex away, but he kept them at bay, trying to keep on pushing Andrew against the wall.
“You were just waiting for your turn, you son of bitch! Dickhead! You were just waiting to get a chance to fuck that bitch!”
Andrew’s expression hardened, and this time, when he reached for Craig, it wasn’t to pull at his hands, but to grab the collar of your ex’s shirt and violently pull as well.
“Don’t you fucking dare insult her like that!” he growled, with such anger and threat, a tone you had never heard on his voice before.
“Both of you, stop!” your father ordered.
“Stop this! What are you doing?” you added, tugging at both their arms, but none of them seemed to care.
Instead, Craig went on, pushing on all of Andrew’s buttons…
“I can’t believe she did run straight into your bed like a whore…”
Before anyone could react, Andrew was pushing Craig away with so much force that he stumbled backwards and fell down.
For a second time, the whole room was too stunned to react, while Craig staggered back to his feet. Andrew moved away from the wall, and as your ex stood straighter again he was glaring at him, jaw tightly clenched. You had never seen so much wrath on his features before.
But it wasn’t over. Craig threw Andrew only one look before he was bending over and running to him, tackling him and making him fall back easily. You gasped at the loud sound of Andy’s head hitting the tiles.
Too stunned to move, Andrew didn’t even try to avoid Craig’s punch, and he got hit straight across the jaw. Thankfully, hands were then pulling Craig off of Andrew. You didn’t care though. You didn’t pay attention to your father and one of your aunts pushing Craig into the kitchen while shouting at him. You didn’t notice your cousin hurrying to join him, clearly worried. All you could do was to fall on your knees by Andrew’s side, holding onto his shoulders and gently shaking him while he blinked, clearly disoriented.
“Andy! Andy, you’re okay? Can you hear me?” you asked in a rush.
His unfocused gaze finally found you, and he blinked some more. You thought he was about to faint.
“Andy! Stay with me! Are you alright?”
Your hands moved from his shoulders to his cheeks. He took hold on your right wrist, touch firm and yet gentle still.
“Y/N…”
“You’re okay? Andy?”
“I’m okay.”
“You’re sure? How’s your head? Do you feel dizzy?”
“A little bit. I’m okay though.”
“Really?”
Slowly, he nodded. Your mother appeared by your side, asked Andrew how he felt as well. His answer was to slowly sit up. He looked exhausted, all of a sudden, paler than usual, but there was no cut across the back of his head, merely the beginning of a bump.
“I’m fine,” he repeated.
You helped him to his feet, your mother checking that he was unharmed too.
“I’m so sorry,” he apologised, but your mother was quick to dismiss it all with a wave of her hand.
“It’s not your fault, dear. Let’s seat you down on the sofa for a moment.”
“No, I’m… I’m fine.”
Samantha walked out of the kitchen, crying, and you wondered why. Or actually, you didn’t. You didn’t want to know. You didn’t want to stay for a minute longer in the same room as either her or Craig.
“Actually, I think we should go,” you interjected, and Andrew nodded.
“No, please… Craig is going to be kicked out, don’t worry about him,” your mother argued.
“No, really, I… I want to go home. Please, I want to go home.”
You were on the verge of tears, and so you turned towards the hallway, followed by your mother’s protests, along with some of your other relatives’ kind words. But you wanted to run now, disappear and leave all of them behind. You were tired of being looked at… you needed to be on your own for a while.
Meanwhile, Andrew was remaining silent. He only spoke to apologise once again to your family, clearly ashamed. You left before Craig could be let out of the kitchen, and were close to running to your car.
You climbed in, Andrew following suit in the passenger seat. You drove on, heading for home. You should have taken Andrew to his house, but you didn’t even think about it. The thought never came. You simply headed home, and Andrew didn’t protest, even though he obviously recognized the road you were taking.
Only when you arrived before your building did you realise that Andrew was still here, the ride had been filled with nothing but silence.
“You should come in, I’ll take a look at your jaw.”
Indeed, a bruise was forming under his beard, colouring the sharp angle of his face with yellowish hues.
“It’s nothing. Nothing broken.”
“Please, come in. Please…”
You stared at each other for a moment, but he yielded, nodding, at long last. You waited for him to climb out of your small car, and he held on the door before closing it, wincing as he unfolded his tall frame.
“You’re sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, just… a little dizzy, that’s all.”
“You need to go to the hospital?”
“Don’t be ridiculous, it was just a punch.”
“And a hit on the head.”
“Thick skull. Don’t you know that already?”
You both chuckled, while Andrew followed you inside your home.
You rid yourself of your shoes and coat, aiming straight for the freezer to get a bag of frozen vegetables there. Andrew was by your side, leaning against the kitchen counter. He didn’t protest when you gently rested the cold bag against his jaw, merely winced at the sharp sensation.
“Thanks,” he breathed, staring right into your eyes.
But you didn’t acknowledge his words. Instead, your world got blurred by tears.
“You… are you angry?”
But Andrew shook his head.
“No. No, I’m not angry.”
“You should be.”
“Probably.”
“You… you had to lie all day long because of me, and then I kissed you without your permission and you probably hated that, and then you punched Craig, and you got punched in the face… all because of me. I’m a lousy friend.”
“The worst,” he corrected you, but there was a tender smile on his lips.
“You should be angry.”
“I’m not.”
“You should hate me.”
“I don’t. And I…”
A pause. He seemed out of breath for a second, wetted his lips, before he went on.
“I liked it, by the way.”
“What?”
“Your kiss. I… I didn’t hate it. I liked it. A lot.”
Your eyes merely grew round, and Andrew looked away, averting his eyes. He heaved a painful sigh.
“I told you this would be a terrible idea,” he pointed out.
“I know.”
“And you didn’t listen.”
“I know.”
“And now… what are we going to do now?”
You had no answer to give, you were plagued by this same question yourself.
A moment of silence, suspended in mid-air. Outside, the quiet of cars passing by and the wind flowing through branches and pushing clouds around. Inside, the cold of the bag making your fingers ache, a welcomed burn to distract your busy mind, while Andrew was taking a sharp inhale.
“I heard you, you know?”
His voice was quiet, low and deeper than usual. He blinked, focusing on you again, trapping you into these hazel orbs you adored.
“When you talked to Craig, in the kitchen. I heard you. I was right behind the door.”
“That’s creepy,” you tried to deflect the impact of that revelation with humour, speaking the silliest thing you could have uttered. It still made Andrew break, laughing despite his best effort not to.
“I was sent to put the napkins away. But then… I heard you. Didn’t interrupt. Wanted to know what you would say.”
He narrowed his eyes a little, the ghost of a frown forming a crease across his brow.
“Did you mean any of that? Or was that just… one more lie?”
The bag of vegetables slipped from the hold of your numb fingers and fell, but Andrew stopped you as you reached for it, holding your face in his hands to force you to look at him.
“Did you mean what you said? About me? About us?”
“What does it matter?”
He knitted his brows, tightening his hold on you. You noticed the way his breathing stuttered, grew shallower.
“What does it matter?” he repeated. “Are you serious?”
“You don’t feel that for me. So… what does it matter?”
He let out a shaky breath, almost a sigh.
“Why did you kiss me like that, though?” you asked, tears shining in your eyes but you were determined not to let them fall. Your tone was almost bitter as you questioned him. “On the couch. You kissed my cheek… God, that was so much more than what it should have been…”
He blinked, trying to read behind your words for their true meaning. He didn’t find it, reached in the dark and his hand closed on nothing.
“I’m sorry if I hurt you. I just… I didn’t mean to.”
“Why did you kiss me like that? That was so out of line…”
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry…”
“Why did you do that?”
Slowly, he shook his head. He looked almost stunned by your question.
“You really don’t know?”
He leaned back against the counter, and pulled you with him, until your faces were so close, you could feel his breath fanning over your lips.
“You really don’t know?” he asked again.
“I don’t know…”
“Did you mean it? When you said… when you said that you wanted me. Did you mean it?”
“I said a bit more than that…”
“I’m not foolish enough to hope for the rest to be true as well, I’ll settle for a ‘I vaguely like you’.”
It was your turn to chuckle even if you didn’t want to.
“If I answer earnestly, you’re going to hate me for wanting more and breaking our friendship.”
He shook his head, leaning closer, until his forehead rested upon yours. At long last, you reached up, holding on his forearms for support, and to make sure he wouldn’t go away…
You heard him wincing as he spoke, heard it in the way his voice was shaking. You had closed your eyes, and so had he.
“Let’s be honest with each other. Please… I’m tired of pretending. I’m tired of denying the way I feel for you, or what I want when it comes to you, I’m tired… I’m tired of letting you slip away. So, please. Please be honest with me. I can’t keep on holding onto some mad hope. I can’t keep on pretending that I don’t… That I…”
He struggled to breathe for a moment, you tightened your hold on his arms but remained there, eyes closed, leaning against him.
“I kissed you like that because… because I wanted to. Because I let myself slip into yielding. Because I couldn’t help it. Because… because it hurt so fucking much to hold you like this, to be close to you in this way, to act the way I have longed for for years under some pretence, under a mask, as a lie… when it wasn’t a lie. When I… I wish it wasn’t a lie. I wish it could be for real.”
He sighed, long and painful and full of hurt, and you reached up to kiss him before he could say anything else.
If your first kiss at your parents’ house had been passionate and quite messy because of it, this one was slow, taking its time to learn each other’s taste and lips and mouth. You had no idea for how long you kissed, all you knew was that, while it lasted, there was nothing else in the world but Andrew kissing you; and that when it ended, you longed for it to start again.
“I meant it,” you whispered, bearing your soul in a confession that was so raw you couldn’t summon anything but a murmur, eyes still closed and lips barely parted from his. “What I told Craig, I meant it. I mean it. I want you… And this whole day has been torture for me too.”
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry it took me so long, I’m sorry I didn’t say anything.”
“I didn’t either…”
“I almost said it a thousand times. Never had the courage.”
“Please… have it now, and kiss me again.”
He obliged, without protest or hesitation. You were lost in his embrace all over again, and rested your head against his chest when you eventually pulled away.
“So… what now?” you asked, voice muffled by his cardigan.
“We could go on a date.”
“I want to be wined and dined, just so you know,” you joked, making him chuckle.
“Duly noted. Anything else, for her ladyship?”
“I don’t know… I’m… I’m so fucking scared, to be honest.”
“Because everything is going to change?”
“Because it might not work out. Because… you might leave me, and I might give up and a thousand things can go wrong, and…”
But he softly shushed you, running his hand through your hair.
"Look, I… I’m not going to pretend that I’m not scared to bits by this. I feel like we have so much to lose. But I… I want you so badly. I want you so much, I’m ready to take the risk. We can take things slow, we don’t have to rush through this. I just… I feel like I'm truly myself when I'm with you. I want to be myself when I'm with you. So now, if you're scared, don't call it love yet. But whatever you want to call it, it's incredible, and I'm not going to give up on this. I'm not going to give up on us. I can promise you that, at least. That I’m ready to fight for this, for you.”
He was surprised by your chuckle.
“You’ve fought already. If you can call it a fight…”
“Yeah, exactly. I mean… he was about to seriously kick my arse but I did have a few seconds of manly glory there.”
You both laughed at that, the tension receding as a result.
“Perhaps, at the end of the day, that plan of mine wasn’t so bad,” you joked, making Andrew laugh harder, shaking his head.
“It was definitely a terrible idea. The worst idea you’ve ever had. Look at all the trouble it has caused!”
“Are you calling me trouble?”
“Of the worst kind.”
You were happy about this kind of trouble though, as Andrew was leaning down to kiss you once more, holding you close, unwilling to ever let go.
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contentloadinggg · 3 months
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Insane, Baby - Hozier Drabble
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Author’s Note: I have no words for this fic. Just, I can’t. It just a spew of horny nonsense.
Summary: Me making Andrew feral. That’s it. (Genderneutral!Reader) (~200 words)
Warnings: Smut, but like, not very explicit smut, possessive Andrew, one dialogue line of dirty talk, unbeta read and generally just a word vomit.
This is a work fiction and is not a reflection of who Hozier is.
Fic Under the Cut❤️ 18+ only, you’ve been warned.
Andrew wasn’t insane, he wasn’t. But that was so hard to remember when he was on top of you. Struggling so hard to control himself. Grunting and practically growling in your ear. His hips meet yours in another, nearly brutal thrust. His fingers grip your waist hard enough to leave bruises. He’ll kiss over them later, apologizing as he showers you with his affection. He’ll shove down the beast that stirs inside of him. In the depths of his stomach. It purrs at the sight of you marked as his so tangably. 
He buries his face into the crook of your neck. The scent of your combined arousal filling his nose. Andrew can’t help himself. Lapping up the glistening sweat on your neck. Groaning at the taste of your skin before sinking his teeth into it. Using them to pull and turn your skin red. 
His panting brushes over your cheek as he whispers into your ear. His voice rough and thickened with his accent. A side of Andrew nobody else gets to see.
“Just want you to be all mine, all mine. I need you.”
The words are hot against your skin. Just like his front against you. Sweat slick between your bodies. 
Andrew isn’t insane. He isn’t. But he forgets who he is with you and that’s who’s insane.
I’m crazy, but I’m free.
Oh, expect the Valentine’s Fic to actually be on time. :)
-Thad💚
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crimsonred-hi · 3 months
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Age Gap - Headcannons
Pairing: Andrew Hozier-Byrne x younger!Reader
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✨Before your dating✨
• When you too meet, your would be a smaller musician who is his new opening act. And he would be friendly, but I think he’s a bit scared of anyone much much younger than him, he’s definitely scared of gen z because of how manic they all are. He would assume your like that too.
• He wouldn’t be very flirty with you like he is with everyone else, being dreadful aware of your gap in age. But when he starts to loosen up around you, he would give compliments on your performance.
• He is an incredible help.
• He teaches you things about the music industry and how it works, who to stay away from. If you’re very naive about that stuff he would probably try and protect you at all costs.
• Like, the man walks you back to your hotel room while on tour because he’s genuinely scared of you getting bombarded by people.
- he also holds onto your arm or elbow as he walks you back, not wanting to lose you.
• He’ll make jokes about your being young and naive, calling you things like ‘Bambi’ and ‘fawn’ just to emphasise that your a baby in his eyes (not really a baby, but a creature to be protected).
• He’s rather protective. You, him and his band go on nights out sometimes, you tend to be approached by other men, and Andrew (being the spectacular gift to women from god he is) will protect you.
• He thinks your too naive to notice when these men are sketchy, your not, but you let him ‘protect you’ because it makes him feel useful (and all men like being useful).
• This need to protect you is kind of how Andrew figures out he’s catching feelings. Alex one day makes a comment about Andrew ‘being soft’ on you and about how Andrew calls you so many pet names.
• Andrew tried to deny there pet names, he didn’t win that argument.
• After one that conversation, Andrew starts overthinking about the situation, you’re so much younger than him and he’s noticeably soft on you. What are people gonna think of him, it’s kinda weird in his head, and the more he thinks about it the age gap seems to feel larger.
• It gets to the point he’s not even talking to you because he’s over thinking it.
• You have to corner him in a room to get him to speak to you. “Andrew, why aren’t you talking to me?” He tries to deny that as well, but fails when he figures out you’re not dense.
• It doesn’t take a lot of persuasion for him to spill his guts to you, telling you every feeling he has. He was too emotional to realise that he’s just told you he’s into you.
• You have to calm him down before you say anything to him,
• And just as your about to talk to him your called onto stage. Really horrific timing.
• After the show, Andrew is filed with adrenaline, so on the adrenaline high he pulls you away from everyone. And you can figures the rest out.
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bisexual-apocalypse · 21 days
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there’s almost 200 votes on the poll i posted and with less than a day left it’s pretty clear that friends to lovers is gonna win (good thing i already started writing it teehee)
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hauntingoldhouses · 24 days
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what we're supposed to do with all his friends around?
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