#AND SHE SITS NEXT TO ME IN CLASS

[qcomicsy]

I will always be a normal guy defender, I don't want vigilantes who always look like super models unless it makes sense for their characters (Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Kori Anders). I want super-heros that look like the guy you could stumble on the supermarket. Your classmate. Your coworker. A random face in a ocean of people. Absolutely and completely forgetful unless you love them.

I want super-heros to take of their mask and the person be like "THAT'S JUST SOME GUY." their face leak and people be like "WHO 🗣️🗣️ THE FUCK IS THAT⁉️‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥" enough with conventionally attractive heros who look like bodybuilders more some heros who would be your Uber driver and you wouldn't pay attention to them twice.

#I know beuty sells but something about the reali of this really got me #specially about characters like Peter Parker Jason Todd or Barbara Gordon #there's no need for them to be an IMVU character #this is why I loved Barbara Gordon design in Gotham Knights and her old design in the 90's #because she IS pretty #but she looks like a girl I could borrow a pencil on class or sit next to the subway #and not callie jenner sister #q rambles

[realbeefman]

eric foreman is representation for deeply repressed weirdos who are clinging to normalcy with splintered nails and blistered palms. representation for people who lost something fundamental along the way. for people who want to go home, to be the person they thought they were. representation for people who can’t face what they’ve become because it’s who they’ve always been

#foreman one of the most queercoded characters. i stand by that #my source for that is im queer and i relate to him #inspired by the super hot girl who sits next to me in class who called me normal today. i came a little when she said that to me ngl #foreman just wants to believe that hes a good person but he ISNT. and he never will be #because the way he defines ‘goodness’ isnt attainable for him #tragic ass character #eric foreman #house md #foreman

[theshadowrealmitself]

On the topic of gender thoughts, one thing that’s been difficult to explain to cis people who’ve never really thought of gender before is that I always specify “genderfluid” rather than saying “nonbinary” (they ask for some reason) because in my own understanding of my gender, it doesn’t fit very well, because even tho I do have many days where I’ll feel nonbinary or agender, I also have many days where there’s very much a binary gender going on

And they just. Stare at me like I’m explaining calculus to them.

#university has been a kind of hell #where everyone keeps asking me what my deadname is #and the girl who sits next to me in one of classes keeps calling me it even tho I introduced myself to her with my lived name #I don’t even know how she got my deadname #university has been hell #no fandom #genderfluid #gender crisis

[ihopeucomehomesoon]

i won’t hold people to the same standards i have on myself in terms of friendship bc everyone shows they care in different ways

#this is a part affirmation and part intro to a rant i need to unleash #but i’ll leave it in the tags here bc it feels safer lol #it’s abt my housemate the other day when we had our last class which is online but our previous classes were in person so as a class we #usually just pull it up on the main computer and broadcast the zoom in the classroom #but on this day the class before this zoom class got out early so lots of people went home early to just watch it on their own zoom or wtvr #so the row i sit in was pretty empty except for me my housemate and our two friends #and usually my housemate sits on my right but she got up and moved to sit on the other side next to our other friend and said nothing #and i didn’t want to say anything bc i was kinda sad/offended even though #her moving seats probably has nothing to do with me and much rather her personal preference i can’t help but think negatively abt myself #also one morning we were both off she went to the smoothie shop and coffee shop and just went to pick up her orders and i felt the same #reaction of like sad/offended bc she didn’t consider me at al like what if i wanted a smoothie too! TF #or coffee even though i don’t drink coffee anymore wtvr #my thoughts on her and my friendship are kinda rocky bc we feel so out of sync #i feel like she’s always in her own world and it’s hard to get through to her and become real friends #it’s whatever not all friendships can be deep and meaningful

[saetoru]

sat next to the hottest girl in my last class and she SMILED at me and i was sweating

#my smile must’ve been so awkward #i been rethinking it the whole time #i hope she sits next to me again next class #i’m hopelessly in love

[transxfiles]

mirror affirmations but i'm just staring at my reflection, hands with a deathgrip on the edge of the counter, saying "i am not a homewrecker i am not a homewrecker i am not a homewrecker"

#girl i sit next to in my writing class is low key flirting with me but she has a gf???? and at first i was like #''bailor calm down she's not flirting you're reading too much into this'' but we were out today #together . outside of class. you know college friend things. and i was joking about my taste in women #and she put on this VOICE and she was like ''oh what's your taste in women?'' tucking her hair behind her ear and looking at me through her #eyelashes. girl. GIRL. girl you are in a beautiful relationship. what is this. what are we. #no one look at me i am having another dykefailure on main moment its fine. #cricket.chatterbox #the dyke drama tag

[long-suffering-little-spoon]

Guess who finally got to play Mercutio today

#it was 3.1 #the girl sitting next to me was tybalt #i whispered “stab me” and she poked me in the hand with her ruler and i died lol #we might get to do the queen mab speech next week i'll have to wait and see #but overall i'm so happy #besides doctor who mercutio is like my no. 1 dream role (even if it is just in class) #you actually have no idea how much this means to me lmfao #romeo and juliet #mercutio #liz's mercutio saga

[daily-whistlepaw]

daily whistlepaw until ah becomes PoV day 1167

I think I finally understand how people feel when around a crush, can't say I enjoy it

#warrior cats #whistlepaw #windclan #medicine cat apprentice #this isn't my first crush lol but this one has had me feel the strongest of feelings (and might be my first genuine crush lol) #the fact I have been building up A Lot of stress for the entire week probably didn't help. #and the fact my stomach hurt is also probably at least partially to explain by the fact I barely ate last night #but MAN seeing my (latest) crush in such a pretty dress and then go on stage and play (a goddess!!!!!!! she's a goddess) #(I already bought tickets to go see the full thing; I will die but I will die happy (I hope)) #but yeah I struggled for a good 2 hours to fall asleep and also had stomach weirdness happening the next morning #man it was not fun #(and then she came to sit next to me during class and I had to play it cool (I was too deranged on sleep deprivation to really care about #being my typical brand of weird but I do sometimes feel like an idiot around her and feel guilty because then I fear that she finds me #annoying and will hate me and I will fail this again (losing a friendship over a crush once was not that fun lol) and Traumas don't help #either at all so uh I'm just trying to spend time with her I just always feel a bit worried that I'm annoying her and it's consuming my bra #I do also still feel a little guilty about having this crush; internalized homophobia/issues around sexuality are hard to shake off #and while it's very normal and stuff I never dare to go the entire way when my brain conjures fantasies that are a little too risqué #I just feel guilty man I know I shouldn't but still it fucking sucks in my brain #and god talking about this in therapy would be a mess #I might have to eventually but I don't wanna #anyways; wild vent in the tags aside; yay a whis!

[arsonist-chicken]

What if I just developed social skills to be able to actually make new friends in person and then used those skills to get a new phone number and pack my bags and run away to a place where no one knows me and all my past mistakes and fuckups and started over there without going into social isolation

#i needed to hand my expose in in february and got an email about it this weekend and agreed to hand it in on tuesday #it is now sunday evening and i just got another email about it but thinking about opening it makes me want to throw up #she's so nice and i don't want to see her scolding me for AGAIN not sticking to a deadline #what if she tells me that was the final deadline and i won't receive a grade for that class and so i won't be allowed to write my thesis #until next january? I wanted to graduate this autumn. it's april and i haven't even started on my thesis and i have like three bullet point #for the expose; and idek if I'll be able skillwise and mental health wise/adhd wise to actually write the stupid thesis #like what if i can't do it and then i've spent the last one and a half years on a degree i won't get in the end and then i won't be able to #apply to a lot of the jobs i thought actually looked good #@god give me some social butterfly skills and I'll give or throw most of my stuff i don't absolutely need away so i can just.. #go somewhere new. start over. and not become even more socially isolated than i already am. #does anyone know what a panic attack feels like because i'm having suspicions that i might have finally gotten them this year #but didn't recognise them as such because it could be worse #so anyway. god grant me some social friend making skills #if you can't do that at least throw in some adhd and depression treatment. i am sick of this. #and by this i mean the way i've been living my life at least since i left high school; probably even while still in high school #vent posts #mine #i love my online friends so much but i can't meet them outside to sit in the sun or chat about anything at all or go have coffee together #or or or you get me

[silenthillbunni]

📓🖊️🧸

#i feel so lonely now bc i have no one to talk to sksksk #my sisters gets mad whenever i try to talk 2 mom and she just slammed doors nd got irritated at me #nd my mom is so stressed nd in a bad mood so she just got annoyed when i tried saying smth to her #so ig i should just vent to my bestfriend beloved diary confidant thats been here for me for 5yrs<3333 #anywayyy today was rough.. i woke up w a headache after 3hrs of sleep :(( #but still had to get up nd get ready nd eat boxed mashed potatoes for breakkyy 🤢🤮 (it's so gross after eating it everyday lol) #then w my hunchback nd achy stomach i went to school. it was frustrating bc ppl r so fkn rude #they bumped into me at the bus nd i had to sit like a weirdo caging my left stomach side from everyone. had to elbow some dumb fkn guy bc he #pressed his backpack into my side. so i had to basically push it away from me lol he thought i was so weird. but move tf away asshole?????? #got to school nd checked myself in the mirror nd i was so pale i look like absolute garbage its annoying :(( #it was next to insufferable to endure class bc my head hurt so bad (it was the worst part i think) nd i couldnt sit up straight so my back #hurt so bad too sksksks :< #but i managed to write a little but on my assignment #then i left a bit earlier bc i couldnt stand it anymore i was feeling so bad #wrnt to the library bc i had to return some books. could only carry two small ones tho so have to go back multiple times sksksk #felt soooo bad but ate some more disgusting mashed potatoes nd took a nap w an ice pack. took a migraine pill even if it upsets my stomach🤣 #now a few hours later i feel better physically #buuuuuut im so miserable im not even kidding #idc if it sound pathetic or fatty but genuinely that moment w a cup of coffee nd a small chocolate treat everyday makes me feel sm better #like im not kidding!!!!! it does a lot for my peace of mind sksksk T-T #im so miserable bc i cant eat anything still im so hungry :(( #and im weak. im pale. my skin's dry. it's itchy bc of malnutrition... i feel faint nd dizzy nd slow nd just not good at all #im so frustrated i hate this sm i wanna feel strong and healthy!! i dont wanna be constantly hungry. i wanna go to the gym nd go for walks #i wanna be able to sit up straight nd not get back pain!!! #i know i know it's only been 8 days since surgery and it takes time to heal i get it..... :( #but theres just too much going on and im so sick and tired of it all #mostly i just wanna be able to eat and feel strong bc i feel so weak nd i miss food so much sksksksk

[lesbaurinkos]

like guys they literally have matching slits. do you even know.thye literally have matching slits

#theyre so ridiculous. guys they literally have m #anyway i learned the girl who sits next to me in my thursday class and complimented my nose piercing was ALSO watching wad this weekend #so im beginning to think she absolutely did clock me from. my own very damning eyebrow slit. #and thats the beauty of art school isnt it! just a concentration of phannies out here. i love it

[hastthouconsideredthetetrapod]

dunno if a girl was flirting with me or not

#but she did come at the end of my english class sit next to me ask about my homework (she is not in this english clas) #compliment how soft my hair looks ask me about the color of my personality (related to another class tbf) said hers were the same colors #said i looked cool and ended with her insisting she'll be early to class tomorrow to sit beside me. #like! ok!!! #anyway most speedrun of a social interaction ive done all year #htxt

[confused-spood]

Something funny happened. Or maybe is happening?

So me and a fellow aroace friend made a lil fun idea for Valentine's, since as aros, we have no desire to do any task the holiday is meant to be done with someone else, and also that we don't actually have anyone, so we told ourselves to make one for each other, but make it that it was supposed to be from someone that was in love with us for so long and it was supposed to be 'anonymous'.

So there I was last night, writing the word to say in that faux love letter, and after many hours, this is what I came up with:

Dear Mika,

And that's it. That's literally it.

Every time I try to write something romantic, by brain.exe refuses to continue to operate. I can't even ask heart.exe for help because that one is even more so confused!

So I opened my phone and texted her about my letter for her, and guess what? She updated her letter for me, and her response was that her head was hurting from all this fake-assery.

It kinda means something a lil deeper for me than a few laughs, really. It's like, as aromantics, we don't just "not experience romantic attraction", it's also up to the point that we are literally unable to understand and grasp the concept of romance as a whole. Even though we may think we do, when faced a hurdle that evolves actual romance, we're unable to jump through it.

There's only so much faking can do, and deep inside, we can't really say that we understand the alloromantics as much as we do, because that's on a completely different brain wave process.

#aromantic #aro #aroace #asexual #ace #valentines day #love letters #also I'm gonna print this shit cuz my handwritinv sucks ass #Another thing I wholly fear is that the girl that's been flirting with me is gonna get me something for Valentine's #And lemme just say #that's horrifying. #I literally fear that and I wish upon everything it won't happen #but bro #yesterday we were sitting next to each other in class #And she goes ahead and asks me what our plan for Valentine's was #Like #Bro??? #There is absolutely nothing going on between us #Except maybe for a few friendly flirting #Maybe about three unofficial dates that I still am looking at with a platonic-tinted glass #And other....stuff #but my point is #I don't like her like that!

[mack-anthology-mp3]

survived first day back at school only made an ass of myself once

#had to introduce myself in music class even though most of us knew everyone #like uhm hi im [name] i use she/her pronouns most of the time i like pj harvey and radiohead uhmm over the holidays i watched ten seasons o #doctor fucking who #god i'm a nerd ANYWAYS #forgetting the band guy who sits right next to me who i want to better friends with hates radiohead and outed myself as a dumbfuck tv show #enjoyer i could have said ANYTHING. ANYTHING ELSE. BUT NOOOOOOOO #it's fine no one will remember anyways #she/her MOST OF THE TIME?????? WHO AM I KIDDING I JUST USE SHE/HER #imploding #anyways

[femcelhood]

“How come nobody talks to me in college compared to each other” oh yeah

#would you guys sit next to me during immunology class 🥺 #fun fact during microbio I would sit at the front in full view of everyone #and whenever the teacher mentioned something I would look it up #one day she brought up HPV which can cause genital warts #and the website I pulled up had full screen images of just that. on my laptop :)

[the-one-who-lambs]

An actual exchange I had with one of my students today during my office hours:

Student who regularly shows up just to hang out: Hey you seem kinda stressed what's up

Me: oh nothing much, I just write as a hobby and someone said some mean things to a newer writer to the community and *gives her a summary*

Student: community? Lmao it's okay you can say fandom. ...So do you post on AO3 or what?

Me:

Student: You are posting to AO3 right? We've both talked about tumblr so it's not that far of a leap

Me: ........................yes

Student: Okay good, I just didn't want to hear Wattpad because you deserve better than that.

#hannah's rambles #after discussing primary productivity with her for the next ten minutes she showed me her favorite buffy the vampire slayer fic #rated E. #this is NOT the same student who sat RIGHT next to me during the lecture section (that i wasnt teaching) then pulled out her laptop #and started reading something on ao3 rated m. #sitting at the front of the class. #am i in danger? #first student isnt on Tumblr anymore but #my hit count is just high enough that i made a second pseud for certain rated works and set them to registered users only #Because what if onE OF MY STUDENTS FINDS ME