#‘I think im having a panic attack’

[ratislatis]

idk why it’s just coming to me now but I remember feeling this cold, white catharsis upon realizing that it wasn’t Freddie’s decision to give Glenn that panic attack. It was Anthony’s. And the way he said it, so finite, “Glenn is having a panic attack.” in a tone that was used before only to set up a disastrous scene.

It hurt, a lot, because in the weirdest way possible that’s exactly what having a panic attack is like. You’re sitting there with your world crashing down around you and then a disembodied narrator suddenly says, “This bitch shutting down.” (Distinctly in a Stanley Parable manner.)

#dndads #dungeons and daddies #glenn close #using the team’s actual names instead of ‘mr/mrs lastname’ was fucking traumatizing but I did it so nobody would get confused #anyway I wanted to say something in the tags that I couldn’t above because I can’t add breaks while on mobile #so tw for active shooter DRILLS if you’re reading this #one time. not too long ago #we had an active shooter drill at school while I was in orchestra #and as soon as I heard that my body went ‘oh hell no’ but I have anxiety so I ignored it #and we got outside #and the whole music department was huddled in the parking lot #and it was a beautiful day #and I was shaking #and I turn to my acquaintance maddie and I go #‘I think im having a panic attack’ #and then I start laughing hysterically. and I bend over with a hand on her shoulder because there are tears streaming down my face #and my conductor bless his gay soul he comes over like ‘what is going on’ #and I had to shuffle to the bhr while an imaginary shooter was in the school #because I tried to Not have a panic attack and besties. take it from me. nobody has IGNORED a panic attack and lived to tell the tale #anyway. glenn just like me fr LMAO

[inkskinned]

hey btw if you're in the USA at  2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.

if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.

additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.

i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."

"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.

#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!" #to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid'' #like..... gets me #yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai #and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that. #you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time. #dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem. #these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly. #they arent meant to be fun and exciting. #OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off. #but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X #dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was. #i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill. #the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT. #like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU #for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...

[tekitothemagpie]

#i forgot to post this #i think #i know zoro was having a panic attack when that happened #like “im not good enough bs” #meanwhile luffy wants to hold a banquet lmaooo #one piece #monkey d luffy #roronoa zoro #luzo #zolu

[nartothelar]

I was seeing the comic of Emmets self destructing behavior even after he and Ingo reunited and wow… that implication it’s not the first time…

How many times must have this happened? How many times until Ingo knew snapping him out by a gentle hand on his shoulder? What bad habits did Emmet develop while being on his own? With "Ingo" encouraging him to be more healthy? Just so deliciously dark! I love it?

On the other hand how much strain Ingo's body going through when he has his moments he sees "the man in white" his body switches to "life-or-death-mode" receiving a little bruise could cause him to fall into full panic mode and try to treat it like a lethal wound if not for Emmet snapping him out of it and calming him down again.

While both have their moments of seeing their subconscious guardian angel both react differently.

Emmet is apathetic towards "Ingo" dismissing him since he’s not even there. He reacts mentally.

Ingo’s whole body could react to small bruises and injuries like they could kill him and depending on his support to get through it. He reacts with his whole body.

Also when Ingo’s aware he’s probably insecure about all the scars he’s got on him now. How many times he almost died… he doesn’t want the real Emmet to know. It’s bad enough that "the man in white knows"…

YES YES!!! This analysis is so perfect!!! If you'd allow me to ramble a bit...

Emmet's self destructive tendencies have been going on for a while since Ingo's disappearance. He has his Elesa and his depot agents to support him/remind him to not truly forget about himself (Elesa trying to take more time off from her job to check on Emmet/invite him out to lunch to make sure he eats, the veteran depot agents frequently checking up on him during the day/encouraging him take more breaks/interrupting his smoke breaks "accidentally", ect) but it's been hard to say the least. It will take some time for these habits to truly go away even with Ingo back, especially on his bad days.

BUT ALSO YEAH! Ingo! If Emmet appears at the corner of his eye suddenly or he sees him from a distance (any sort of blurred visage - as the man in white always appeared as) he might have a knee jerk response - a sudden urge to run or seek safety - but ultimately it won't be too serious.

His body reacts the most drastically when he is already in a state of injury and Emmet is within eyesight. Elevated heart rate, shortness of breathe, blurred vision, body tremors: his adrenaline levels will spike to an unnatural level causing a ton of stress on the body, since his mind is basically telling his body that he's on the brink of death. The quickest way to calm him down if it were to get this bad would be to have Emmet out of his sight until he can calm down...Not very ideal when the source of one's panic works the same job as you, in a work environment where slight injuries aren't too uncommon

#emmet would try to calm him down if he were to have an episode and it might even work since emmet is pretty good at reorienting him and #helping him focus on where he is and that he is safe but he might also make it worse and cause him to panic harder! :D #and ok this answer is already super long but lastl i think ingo would try to hide his scars once he sees how worried emmet is about him #when he returns like emmet is already worrying about the fact he was sent back in time where pokemon actively try to attack you. he doesnt #want to make him worry about the injuries he's already gotten too #physical or mental #i already hc that out of the two ingo is usually the one to dress more conservatively #like long sleeves and long pants or skirts but after hisui even more so #tho i would think his fashion would also factor in maneuverability and motility now more than ever #BUT YEAH IM RAMBLING NOW LMAO #subconscious guardian angel au #long post #ask #angst

[drawnfamiliarfaces]

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#rc9gn #randy cunningham 9th grade ninja #torn pages au #randy cunningham #rc9gn first ninja #first ninja #rc9gn oc #it has begun....the ocs... they are coming!!!! #lol but no worries ill try to not make them too much of a focus #can u believe it? freakin 9 more pages holy sjiet. and we didnt even got to the actual idea i had im gonna cry #trying to be normal and not enjoy little dad things i make first ninja do ;3 #like helping kids dress cause waiting for them will take forever. the mom hand across body to protect them and the panic run. #the 'fuck the child took off without me' panic run is very familiar for me because i experience it from both sides #when i was a kid i accidently took off into traffic (on the crossing road but on yellow light) thinking my uncle was ahead #but in reality he was behind having a heart attack at my actions and taking off after me #and when i was a teen a family friend's kid i was looking after in the mall took off somewhere and i had a panic attack i lost him lol #his mother was NOT happy #kids? amiright?

[sibmakesart]

#im going insane how ar u #for real ive been having a panic attack for 2 days i think idk its either that or im going to die #never had anything like that before 100% do not recommen #art #artists on tumblr #digital art #anyway here's izzy :) #ofmd #izzy hands #2d animation #gif animation #edward teach #ed x izzy #blackhands

[moeblob]

AU where Brent is a drone to help out at crime scenes and offer input after Right finds the drone. And basically he befriends the really weird guy possibly controlling the drone but has his doubts as to how human the drone's source can be. So Right and Brent just go around trying to solve crimes while Right just calls the drone "Fuckwad (affectionate)".

#my characters #i love right so much and i think he would actually do pretty dang well with a lil assistant drone because not a person #which means not liable to get hurt with a bit of contact so he can just #tap the lil drone or poke it to push it away a little #anyway hi i had a very VERY bad morning and im not gonna lie #i was genuinely at one point thinking huh what if i get hospitalized that sure would suck #and i was thinking huh maybe i should think of how to instruct my mom on how to post on tumblr to tell you guys im hospitalized #which in my defense i had to bother my mom at 2am bc i went down to get pain meds and couldnt make it upstairs #and was breathing so intensely on the stairs hunched over i was like hmmmm not the usual panic attack feelings #and she immediately asked me if i wanted to go to the hospital #so im like cool not gonna let that outta my mind thats fine surely no problem #just gonna fixate on being hospitalized #anyway i finally got helped upstairs and was in incredible pain and couldnt breathe v easily #and it was leading to a bit of a panic attack because i was in so much pain simply trying to inhale and #my breathing was so shallow and sharp and my arms were just having bad circulation and shaking and hm #yeah it was p bad #anyway as a treat to myself not being in a hospital i drew my beloved raccoon son right

[cosmicrhetoric]

vetinari's dubious sexuality being a genuine puzzler for the citizens of his city........the bit in unseen academicals where glenda is like "no one knows what side of the bed vetinari got up on. or even if he went to bed at all" vs. the two seconds in the truth where i was convinced that had de worde not stopped him his neighbor would've fully called vetinari a slur

#f slur specifically ugh im gonna find the passage but that was so like #literally panic reading that bit of the truth like WHAT were you about to call him WHAT were you gonna say??????????????? #and when the guy was like ha ha uhhhh yeah i meant cause of his relationship with known undead milf. least convincing cover EVER #cause unseen academicals i think leaned into it a bit but the truth was kinda early in the series i thought i was gonna have a heart attack #discworld #havelock vetinari

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

yk, its weird being Way Too Aware & In Control of yourself bc technically i believe im having a panic attack. but somehow i am Very Unbothered by this, bc i know whats happening and its illogical. my body's having an overreaction and i couldn't be fucked to join in

#im sitting here casually looking up symptoms to make sure this is a Panic attack and not a Heart attack #got those heart palpies got that chest pain got that sense of Derealization got that shortness of breath #i even feel a lil faint! ive even got a hot flash goin on! tightness in the throat! the whole enchilada #and yet! im somehow vibing... #my body's throwing a fit smh calm down bro its not that bad... #maybe you'll calm down if i drink some water and eat some fruit <3 #shoulda known this was coming... was lying awake at 4 am with really bad palpatations s. m. h. #honestly! this is very annoying! #my vision tried to tunnel exactly Once but i fought it off. idiot meatsuit.... #breathing exercises and internal mantras babeyyyyyy i got this shit on Lock #oh! and look at that! my heart is finally chilling out #still gonna eat water and drink fruit #yall should do that too. at least the water part #go drink water! go! shoo! #hydrate or diedrate! always pick hydrate! #absolutely unprompted #alright well that was fun. only lasted for about *checks nonexistent watch* over an hour #i dont think ive had one that bad before! it really tried to Get Me! #had to fight off the deep sense of dread and rising panic with a mental broom!! #finishing my rebels rewatch helped but still. damn. these demons have hands #my brain: OH WE'RE DYING WE'RE DYING ITS A HEART ATTACK WE'RE GONNA DIE AND ROT FOR DAYS BEFORE OUR BODY IS FOUND OH GOD ITS HAPPENING #hard cut to me vibing with a martini.... wii music on blast... hawaiian shirt On and Unbuttoned... #anyway. drink some water. get some fruit. Thrive!

[starlightiing]

Cardiophilia is so weird bc one minute you're like "this is fine this is okay nothing to see here, folks" and then the next minute you're reminded that the combination of G force, nerves, adrenaline, ect, makes an F1 driver's heart rate stay steady around 160-200 beats per minute the entire time they're racing and then I remember this isn't fine this isn't okay, there is a LOT to see here, folks.

#cardiophilia #cardiophile #i know i know im disgusting i already know you dont have to tell me #just fascinates me how STRONG their hearts have to be to withstand. #i know they do all that training specifically for their hearts too and its like help me ive fallen and i cant get up #i have a panic attack if my heart rate is over 120 for any extended period of time i couldnt imagine #just goes to show another little thing i doubt people think about when they start making fun of and badmouthing these drivers

[lesbianjonimitchell]

im scared im gonna fail my exam on tuesday... ive never been scared of failing before lol. idk man ive just. barely been to class. and i have slacked so much which is honestly very much unlike me... please send thots and prayers

#i think i will pass but im not completely certain! which is a very weird position to be in! but the combination of barely attending class + #the lack of info online + you know. current events in the world feeling more important. i may not make it! #plus of course ive slacked more than probably ever. my anxiety meds may be too efficient. however i still have a feeling #that ill have a panic attack at the exam lol :-D

[canyoureallycallthisablog]

I’M NOT DEAD. SORRY FOR DISAPPEARING FOR SO LONG  SHIT HAS BEEN REAL STRESSFUL FOR LIL OLD ME

HERE YOU HAVE A RALSEI THAT IS NOT AT ALL SUS AS AN APOLOGY

ALSO BONUS UNRELATED DRAWING BECAUSE YOU KNOW I LOVE THOSE:

#utdr #dr #deltarune #deltarune fanart #susie deltarune #ralsei deltarune #ralsei #deltarune ralsei #ralsei dr #dr ralsei #deltarune susie #i don't remember how to tag shit it's been so long since my last post #also it's like one am #but i haven't drawn in weeks #i slept last night it can wait #the bonus image started because i was doodling ralsei and for some reason i drew him saying 'guys i think im having a ralsei kinnie moment' #and then i just realized that that didnt make any sense #and that's basically my speciallity so i had struck gold #but i also wanted to joke about that being a panic attack #but honestly who would correct him with that if he said he was having a ralsei kinnie moment #he isn't having a panic attack he's having a stroke someone help him #so instead i drew susie saying it #and ralsei correcting in #thats seems like in character #originally kris was at ralsei's side but i had to erase them for space sake... #the first picture doesn't really have a story i just like drawing sus ralsei #i think it's fun #originally the bg was pink but it looked less ominous #so it had to go

[whambamvam]

IM THINKING ABOUT THIS FUCKING MOMENT

#IM THINKING ABOUT THIS MOMENT #COS ANTHONY FUCKING LOCKWOOD #MR IM SO TOUGH I WILL PROTECT YOU LUCY #IS HAVING A PANIC ATTACK #COS HE SAW SOMEONE INNOCENT FUCKIJG DIE IN FRONT OF HIM #AND LUCY IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS TO PROTECT LOCKWOOD NOW #AND THEYRE BEING CHASED BY BAD GUYS #WHO ARE VERY WILLING TO KILL THEM #AND LUCY NEEDS HER “FRIEND LOCKWOOD TO HELP HER #SO THEY DO THE HEAD TOUCH THING #AND SHE HELPS HIM OUT OF THE PANIC ATTACK #AND THEY- THEY- #*BREAKS DOWN INTO TEARS* #lockwood #anthony lockwood #lockwood & co #locklyle #l&co. netflix

[sad-leon]

was gonna make a most about a World Trigger au i have rotating in my brain but realized that was a bad idea because I don't want spoilers and i'm only on episode 28 of season one ladjflasjdf

but the autism is autisming and i cannot stop thinking about the boys and what triggers they'd have

and how F!mikey's sacrfice would probably give casey a Black Trigger, and how Leo probably had a Black Trigger from Raph or Donnie in the bad future

Thinking about how Karai's sacrfice left a Black Trigger that only April and/or Splinter could use

please don't send spoilers into my inbox or comments i'll cry

#rambles #the brainrot is bad send help jalsdjflasjdf #aside from being engaged in the episodes #i havent stopped thinking about this #and how the epf could be Border and the hidden city kind of like the Neighborhood #maybe even the PD as a part of the neighborhood #how draxum was developing triggers outside of Border's knowledge like how Tamakoma branch made their own triggers #ell I already see the “weeb” message in discord #im so normal about anime what can i say #it was either this or noragami and i think a noragami au would strike me down immediatly aldkflasdjf #definately not thinking about the similarities between yato and leo on a daily basis #shhhhh totally not #anyways i've activated the audhd and am so happy i'm about to have a panic attack so im going to try to sleep now alsdjfalsdfj #no more watching anime until 2am

[bpdamn]

so y‘all are telling me that i went from not being able to leave my apartment without having a panic attack to working as a barista and content creator (for the café) - i‘d kms just thinking about putting myself out there a year ago what the fuckidyfuck happened

#i know working as a barista isn’t a big deal for most people #but it’s a huge deal for me as i wasn’t even able to go grocery shopping without dissociating or having a panic attack back then #there were days where i just accepted that i will not eat cause i literally didn’t have anything at home #and as i said i couldn’t get out of my apartment for the life of me #so ye it is a huge step for me lol #like i still very much can’t breathe omw to work cause PEOPLE #but apparently once i‘m there i‘m doing good cause i even got asked to be the manager 💀💀💀 #and.. i got called extroverted #PEOPLE THINK IM EXTROVERTED?? #personal

[jewishfalin]

Ngl still hurt by the anon who said my partner and I are both too feminine to tell im the butch despite the photos in question being from halloween and everything

#like i know i should just move past it and anon was clearly the asshole in the situation #welp... i am sensitive and already have trauma around being percieved as/told im too feminine to be how i wanna be👍 #and the fact that it came from another butch #and they said they also are low income and wear feminine stuff like dresses sometimes #which... i know that is so hypocritical why am i letting someone like that get me down #and i wasnt even wearing a dress or a skirt or anything i just had halloween themed fake nails and a headscarf and like. a miniscule amount #of makeup on #but anyways #the fact it came from another butch really hurt #cuz like. id expect someone w a similar gender experience to understand how fucking hurtful that is #and i keep thinking about it bc i wanted to be poison ivy for purim but i keep having panic attacks #bc i keep worrying ill get told im too feminine again #fuck my life #vent