slimmer-shady
ED is hunting me
but I'm stronger than my addiction
257 posts
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Last Seen Blogs
shirozen
5hiro
uwu-aesthetic-boi-blog
KachUwU
hadeer17-8
هَدير
skinnyrepetition
PrettyHurts
false
false's tumblr
Text
Maybe it's because I'm high asf now but...
I have a crush in school... Makes me feel and act like a teenager all over again and I hate that so much! He knows about it but he rejected me, but then after a while talked to me again and texted me out of nowhere while, at the time, literally ignoring me in school.
He gives me hope over and over again without any intention 💀 I'm just too delulu.
He's not even that great he would probably acting way too uninterested while in a relationship. Plus he's the same age as I am (21) and yet doesn't have any type on goal in life right now therefore doesn't care about school the way a 16y/o would. I have no reason to like him because he as a person wouldn't fit my values at all and probably disappoint me in a relationship.
WHY DO I LIKE HIM :( I'm actually too old for this shit...as I said it makes me sound like a teenager again :')
0 notes
Text
i want a Tim Burton body
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
🌠...selca ship...✨
@slimmer-shady
hey hey, yo yo yo yo, thanks for requesting, and now i'm officially back i thought i would pump this out for you
~harry potter~ george weasley🌠✨
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Putting this on here because I know at least some of you are going to feel this.
I've never been loved by someone, all these 21 years. I know some family members do love me but they are kinda forced to do so...
But no guy has ever loved me, instead I was told by the once I had a crush on: "how could someone ever love me" or "I'm too ugly to be loved". I thought I got over this, that I outgrew that BS and that I now know that I'm worthy of love just like everyone else is.
But now that there is a that I might end up with. I like him and I do have a feeling that he likes me too.
I should be happier about this but instead I'm rather scared and worried. That this is not anything for me or that I'm just delulu, that there is actually no way for someone to love me. All these experiences from years ago are still deeply entrenched in my head.
If you feel this way as well: at least now you know that you're not alone 💜
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
This was 2 Months ago.
I'm in recovery since mid-late may and I'm doing way way better. So glad I didn't k*ll myself. It's really hard and exhausting sometimes but it's been worth it so far
Staying alive
Pros: seeing where my future will be, I can eat the food that I like, dance, draw, see my family, see my friends,
Cons: My Ed takes over too much, I have no energy to keep on living, food makes me wanna die, my family is toxic af, my friends would get over it, I see no point in what I'm doing atm (going to school etc.), My family could no longer take advantage of me, my borderline shit makes life even more unbearable than it already is.
Sui starts making more and more sense to me again
6 notes
·
View notes
Photo
Well....he definitely is resting well at least
i hope lewis brian hopkin jones is having a good day or i’m 😤😡🤜🤜
81 notes
·
View notes
Text
it’s kind of alarming how many times this week I thought “I should just kill myself.“
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
being suicidal and living for others is the most drowning feeling ever.
why can’t i find a reason to live for myself?
15K notes
·
View notes
Text
Staying alive
Pros: seeing where my future will be, I can eat the food that I like, dance, draw, see my family, see my friends,
Cons: My Ed takes over too much, I have no energy to keep on living, food makes me wanna die, my family is toxic af, my friends would get over it, I see no point in what I'm doing atm (going to school etc.), My family could no longer take advantage of me, my borderline shit makes life even more unbearable than it already is.
Sui starts making more and more sense to me again
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
nobody here gives a fuck about you. even if you look good, nobody cares, nobody loves you they only care about themselves and they only pretend to like you if you make them look good. if you want to kys just do it nobody cares, people will just feed off of you as long as you’re here. I’m tired of faking it, i’m tired of having my energy fed off of by superficial soul less beings and i’m tired of being drug through the rug in this fucking stupid world idk how i got myself here but i just want to go i just don’t want to be a part of it anymore i’m drained and empty. my self esteem is gone, my will to live is just draining every day, i hate having conversations with people because it just feels so disingenuous, i can’t lose weight because im literally fucking being punished by whatever sadistic power that runs this hellhole called earth and i just have the shittiest end of the stick i swear i will never be seen as beautiful no matter what i do and i will never be able to relax it will always drive me crazy and always eat me alive i just can’t do this shit
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just wrote my first letter of my goodbye series. I planned on writing one everyday till I die, so my family can read it and I get the opportunity to explain my situation, my thoughts and reassure them that I still love them.
It also makes me realize how serious this is. It helps coping with all this. I don't know what I'm saying anymore
0 notes
Text
So...I stopped eating. I don't wanna go on I wanna fade away. I don't have it in me to just take pain killers and knock myself out so I'm just gonna fade away slowly.
Now nothing really matters anymore because I doubt I'll even be here anymore in a week. (I'll update you guys if I'll unfortunately still be alive by that time)
0 notes
Text
My mom caught me while I was purging....
she asked through the door if I was putting a finger down my throat and I said no. She answered "but it Sounds like it", then I went silent.
I stayed in the bathroom because of the shock, it took me a few minutes before I could leave the bathroom and sneak into my room.
I started purging during the day because I thought I could do it more silently, that she wouldn't hear it and maybe even not care about it but well I was too optimistic. In the past, whenever my mom found out stuff about my Ed she either told me I'm faking it, that I only do it for attention or she degrades me in other ways.
I'm so scared of her now. But then again what is she gonna do about it?? I'm a grown woman and she needs me to stay living here at her place. Hate to talk with her about this but I know that she is the problem (regarding the way she treats me and my Ed) so whatever she's going to say is gonna hurt like hell but will probably be bs anyway.
2 notes
·
View notes