flying-when-wind-blows

[flying-when-wind-blows]

some things that are my aesthetic but don’t match:

- dark green

- ocean

- stars

- surfing

- orcas

- hard rock

- muted blue

- really rainy days

- gnr’s trilogy

- disposable photos taken with flash on

- bare feet and jeans

- sea

- morning golden hour

- mismatched layered necklaces

- books published by folio

- ub naked heat palette

- metal guitar riffs

- spanish

- 80s vaporwave neons

- sunset orange

- beaches surrounded by rocks and cliffs

- waffle smell

- art supplies

- empty public transport

- tiny braids in hair

- patagonia

- eating oranges

- songs by beach house

- all of pierre bonnard’s work

- rollerblades

- dark green toenails

- a house by a beach

- rocks

- glitter socks

- muffed sound of a club

- starry earrings

- ice

- smell of white spirit

- french spelling

- sparkly snow

- daffodils

- moleskine notebooks

- postcards from museums

#aesthetic #aesthetics #i made this ages ago #and decided to go public #there are more things i love now #but just wanted to enjoy my drafts #tumblr

[flying-when-wind-blows]

i spent a big part of 2021 and majority of 2022 recovering. which meant that before i stopped throwing up in my mouth spontaneously, i had to gain weight. i was at my heaviest then, and it all seemed so worthless. but then i was graduating, beginning to work, had so many things to do, and was sorting out my depression & anxiety (ed was the aftereffect), and i thought that maybe, just maybe, i can let this all go. 

partially i did - my mind is clearer than it has ever been. if you have it, grab that rope to pull you out form the pit. life is much more fun in the sunlight. recovery is worth it.

i am no longer at my heaviest, i am probably back where i started, square one, except now i can do a push up.

unfortunately, a couple dresses did not fit me right, a few things went wrong in life, and i am wondering once again how low i can go, while still being able to do that one push up.

back again, lost count of the entrances i made. in my mind i am telling myself it is not that bad now.

but don’t we all know, that if it is not that bad then you are not on tumblr.

#recovery is so worth it #can it not be more permanent? #anamia #ana #mia #ed #tw ed #ed things #ed recovery

[flying-when-wind-blows]

amongst the surge of porn bots, i think some humans came to follow me, too.

i wish this was a super artsy inspiring blog, but we all know that ed centers around one thing, and one thing only.

stay safe and sane, in that order, please <3 sending thoughts to anyone entering 2023 with this crap.

#anamia #ana #mia #ed #edblr #ed thoughts #tw #tw ed #anorekcya

[flying-when-wind-blows]

a dude came into the library stoned out of his mind and was like, “do I need a library card to look at books?” And I said, “to take books home, yes. To look at them, no” and he looked so relieved. bro was staring at a fish encyclopedia for like an hour and then just left.

[flying-when-wind-blows]

is it so bad to want to kill everyone at all times

[flying-when-wind-blows]

[flying-when-wind-blows]

[flying-when-wind-blows]

idk who spread the theory that craving ice cubes shows anaemia but that person is a legend

cause most days i end up eating a litre of water in ive and yet everyone who notices are just like yep, nothing to see there, she is just anaemic

totally not trying to freeze myself while feeling the crunch of absolutely 0 cals xoxo

#ice cubes are life #anamia #ana #mia #anorexia #bulimia #ed #ed things #tw #tw ed

[flying-when-wind-blows]

Frederick Judd Waugh.

[flying-when-wind-blows]

having to reveal your weight for sports purposes is the next level of horribleness

was buying a surfboard today and had to tell the guy my weight and i had to be realistic so the fins were correctly picked, oh my was that a trip

#ana #mia #anorexia #bulimia #anamia #ed #ed things #tw #tw ed

[flying-when-wind-blows]

[flying-when-wind-blows]

aesthetics for each element:

Earth

Being skinny on earth

Air

Being skinny in air

Water

Being skinny in water

Fire

Being skinny and on fire

#ana #mia #thinspo #bulimia #anorexia #anamia #ed #tw #tw ed #ed inspo #ed things #anor3xia #buliimia

[flying-when-wind-blows]

Morning sickness but

- there is no unbiblical way i could be pregnant rn

- its not only morning its random

- bulimia fucked my ability to tell if im acc sick

#ana #mia #anamia #tw #tw ed #ed #anorexia #bulimia #anor3xia #bullimia

[flying-when-wind-blows]

[flying-when-wind-blows]

[flying-when-wind-blows]

[flying-when-wind-blows]

the 2-4-8 weeks thing is on repeat in my mind

Im in week 3, i go swimming for 30 mins 4-5 times per week

Yes i feel it, cant wait to see it

#ana #mia #anamia #anorexia #bulimia #ed #ed things #tw #tw ed