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eattherichg5 · 4 months
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I feel like a few months ago
I feel like last year
I feel like last week
I wish I could wake up new
I can’t even escape this
while I sleep
I wish I could wake up
like the old me
The me that was sure
about who I am
The me that was happy
The me that never had to pretend
Or maybe I could wake up new
Happier than I ever been
A mixture of something new
With the old me in mind
I try to drown my thoughts
I wish I had a spine
I wish I could stand up
To my thoughts
And never let them win
But I keep overthinking
Over and over again
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eattherichg5 · 6 months
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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I don't want to live.
I don't want to die.
I just want not to exist.
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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I pray and I pray
God please give me the strength
Please help me over come all the issues that repeatedly effect me again
I wish this was just a phase
A time period in life
Maybe this will fade with the upcoming days and the nights
Maybe this feeling will disappear
As randomly as it came
I get on my knees and I pray in your name
God please be with me during these times
Please help me be strong
I have forgotten how to be happy
It feels like so long
So long ago
I felt purpose in life
Now I’m asking for the strength
As I cry through the night
As I hold in my tears
Infront of family and friends
As I feel ashamed of admitting my pain
For so long there has been nothing I craved
More than the strength
To take it away
Please help me be strong enough
To end all my days
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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It’s been hard to write …
I want to come on tumblr and write the most depressing shit I could think off
But lately I been fighting my urges of being sad and alone
Although some days I’m broken
And let me tell you
The nights are worse.
It’s been hard to write…
I been working on being positive
Even through those days
That I just want to quit.
Even through the nights
That I wish I could just go and forget.
I used to live craving to die
But once I’m dead , they’ll be no room for regret .
What if my thirst to die
Can be quenched?
What if life is more than
What I have seen?
What if I yet don’t understand
What life means?
Those are questions I don’t want to die with.
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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Wrappping paper by ETR. Ny
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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eattherichg5 · 1 year
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I know I tend to post a lot of depressing shit. Don’t let being depressed killl you.
Eat healthy
Go to the gym
Get therapy
Cut people off
Have sex
Drink wine
Meditate
Clean your space
Pray to god
Be active in goal chasing
Stand up for yourself
Seek new opportunities
Depression is something we feel like we can’t control, but remember we are the writers of of own story. Regardless of how many days I cry and wish my days were over. I WILL NEVER HURT MYSELF. I WILL NEVER STOP TRYING TO WIN AT LIFE. I WILL NEVER LET MY THOUGHTS CONTROL ME, and I will find peace, Love, and happiness.
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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All my life I been a nigger
Since the day I was born.
Maybe even before,
Since my parents were niggers
Way before I came along.
I been a nigger
Before pre school, middle school,high school
Before I could drink,
Way before I could drive,
Before I knew right from wrong,
Before I knew being a nigger
Could cost me my life.
Before I ever felt this anger,
Before I ever felt hate,
Before I knew life isn’t fair
For those who resemble my face.
Before I cried due to injustice,
Before my thoughts kept me up late.
I been a nigger for so long
Regardless if I behave,
Regardless if I get good grades,
Regardless if I work hard,
Regardless if I pray.
God why did my boss call me a nigger today?
😞
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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FREE THE POOR
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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All my life I been a nigger
Since the day I was born.
Maybe even before,
Since my parents were niggers
Way before I came along.
I been a nigger
Before pre school, middle school,high school
Before I could drink,
Way before I could drive,
Before I knew right from wrong,
Before I knew being a nigger
Could cost me my life.
Before I ever felt this anger,
Before I ever felt hate,
Before I knew life isn’t fair
For those who resemble my face.
Before I cried due to injustice,
Before my thoughts kept me up late.
I been a nigger for so long
Regardless if I behave,
Regardless if I get good grades,
Regardless if I work hard,
Regardless if I pray.
God why did my boss call me a nigger today?
😞
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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Again today
Today I felt like taking my life
And I wish I could lie
But that feeling ain’t new
I wish I could be happy and full of joy
But then I tell myself
You know that ain’t you
deep down I wish I could be better
Deep down I really wish I knew
A way to water my soul
How to get to the root
They say
it takes a cause
for the effect to effect you
Today I felt like taking my life
And I wish I could lie
But some nights I end
crying at night
I wish I could be happy and full of joy
But then I remember
I live trying to block out that noise
Trying to block out the music
Songs that keep telling me
Do it ….
Today I felt like taking my life.
And yes
These thoughts scare me
I wish I wasn’t this scared to do it
I wish I wasn’t scared but truth is
I’m Scared of being the reason
My mother cries
I’m scared to lose it
Today I felt like taking my life
❤️‍🩹🥀
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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I live trying to drown out the fear
Trying to drown out the thoughts
Wish I could drown myself
With out hurting the ones I love
With out leaving
My niece , brothers and mother
In waves full of pain
The same pain
I feel everyday
I wonder if there’s others
As lonely as me
As lonely as I
As lonely as some one has to be
To start praying to die
To start craving to end
All their sorrows
And pain
I wonder if I die
Will they remember my name
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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eattherichg5 · 2 years
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Starting from scratch 🥀❤️‍🩹
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