biggiecheezits

[biggiecheezits]

Daydreamer

I am a daydreamer. My mind loves to explore certain "what if"s. In my imagination, I could be the president, a superhero, a drug lord, a wizard, or anything else of the like. 

But one scenerio, or should i say genre of scenerio, seems to climb it's way to the top of my mind every time. Sometimes it'll take me to a hallway, or a sidewalk, or classroom, or room, but what is constant in all of these is the girl in front of me.

I am a daydreamer. But I can never get quite right the color of her brilliant eyes, the soothing voice that calms my heart, the shade of her glistening curly hair, the way her smile infects the disease of joy.

Even so, that never stops me from rendering my heart open to her. Sometimes I give a speech, other times I simply whisper those three sacred words. Sometimes she responds back with a thrilling answer, other times I'm left heartbroken.

I am a daydreamer. But now what's in front of me isn't a dream. Those thousands of scripts unite into one sad truth.

When i look at her with all the love I can muster, what's reciprocated is a wave. After only the shortest moment, I am out of her memory like a leaf caught in the wind. 

I am a daydreamer. But what I dream will always stay a dream. 

#no one will see this #So why not yk #bad poetry

[biggiecheezits]

I hate the night sky

For I am enthralled by the shining of each star

Captivated by their beauty. 

Moved by this jewel, I feel no choice but to shine my flashlight in return.

But i know that light will never reach back. I will never be seen as a star.

And so each time I look up, I am assaulted by these glamorous lights. And so I have no choice but to hide in a cave instead, trying to forget about the wonderous light I could never shine as.

And yet, when the next night comes again, I will be the first to take in the twilight beauty once more.

#bad poetry #no one will see this #bad poem

[biggiecheezits]

oh yea if, for the very large audience following me, were wondering, she don't like me. Didn't confess, but like she never has gone out of her way to talk to. me like in thhe past month.

anywho, writing thhis. down for achrivial sake: didn't realize how much i hate myself, didn't realize how much ii miss my old friends and blame myself for tthem leaving. didn't realize how important the past was to me.

#no one will see this #why not yk

[biggiecheezits]

welp, I think I have a crush now.

A crush on my nextdoor neighbor.

I live in a apartment, and my space shares a wall with hers.

I'm really just confused. I shouldn't be going crazy over this girl so much and yet im thinking about her all the time.

When I see her she makes my head spin with how beautiful she is. When im in my room, I have to fight the urge to leave, knock on her door, and just tell her how I feel.

And I don't know if she even likes me. Of course she doesn't, it hasn't even been a month since we first met. But sometimes I text her and she doesn't respond for awhile. She invites me for some stuff, like she made lunch for me and some of her friends and we ate together.

I don't know. I'm clueless. All I can think is that I can't wait to see her smile and hear her voice and talk to her again.

#love #no one will see this #crush #send help

[biggiecheezits]

hmmm... I think I cracked it.

I took a personality test. I've gotten the same result from it for years now. It goes like this:

"You must truly hate yourself. With the ability for deep self-analysis, it's so easy to find things to loathe about yourself."

now, oftentimes I don't agree with this statement. but today I realized the reason why: I place other's view of me above my own.

By default, I hate myself. It takes other people's validation to make me happy. Im extroverted because not a single good thought comes from myself; I need others to make me feel like more than human trash.

#no one will see this #discover

[biggiecheezits]

damn I could use a thick thighed muscle mommy latina rn

[biggiecheezits]

what will satisfy me. what will be enough.

[biggiecheezits]

Helllooooo my favorite corner of the internet! I should definitely be asleep by now but instead I decided that today was the day I feel shame about my social status.

The good thing about being unseen and uncared about is that you can say seemingly whatever you want. Why not? Who else will read it?

The bad thing about being unseen and uncared about is being unseen and uncared about.

If anyone for some godforsaken reason actually reads this, or sees my other posts, just know that this is me letting it all out. amy time i feel like this, I open the app and write.

#idk what to tag this as #epic #no one will see this #haha

[biggiecheezits]

look at me and say that you love me. I can't bear with any other outcome.

[biggiecheezits]

Im so desperate for attention.

I believe I'm a good, funny, talented person but my social value must be low since probably 3 people outside of my family give a singular damn about me.

I just want this feeling to go away.

[biggiecheezits]

time for some over sharing!!!

I was gonna leave a big paragraph here, but then I remembered the poem basically screams what I'm thinking. it's pretty obvious.

so just give me a little bit of attention.

[biggiecheezits]

Hey God,     What do you want me to do right now?     What do you want me to do tomorrow?     Where have you called me?     What have you called me to do?

    Is my God the God of late answers?     Is my God the God of "I'll get back to you later"?     What do you want me to do     As I wait        wait

wait                                   wait

       wait

wait                      wait For guidance?     What else is required of me?     What more do need I do?     When can I be shown?     When I have a clue     of what im doing.

walking              the                     winding           wavering road           that                is                 unending.                                         walking            the                        winding           wavering road                that                                     is                 unending. walking                  walking    walking.                     walking. walking.  walking.  walking. walking. walking. walking.  walking.  walking. walking. walking.      

#poetry #yes it sucks #but i don’t even care #why not #no one will see this

[biggiecheezits]

conversations are just really accurate roleplay

[biggiecheezits]

sexting is just reader x reader fanfiction

[biggiecheezits]

Hey guys give me attention it's literally the only fucking thing i want hahaha

[biggiecheezits]

is the opposite of understandable overstandable or derstandable

[biggiecheezits]

I can't enjoy the music I play if all I hear are my mistakes.

#classical piano #music #Piano #get motivated #motivation #help plz