Women Fear Me, Fish Love Me
August 2nd (2/5)
“Dude, you look like a total geek in that shirt, man!” Trachea shouted across the lawn towards Ekos, who had on a light pink button up and navy blue shorts.
“Oh come on, can’t a hottie like me dress up for the surfer ladies?” Ekos struck a slight pose, glancing back at the shark who was already in swimwear, temporarily covering up his naked torso with a simple white tank.
“I know you’re just compensating for your total lack of abs, my dude. Get on my level.” The sun hued shark flashed his shining six pack towards the scaly fish with a smug grin, before pulling his top down as he turned towards the street with alarmed eyes. “Oh, hey Mr. Mayor!”
“Hey dad.” Ekos greeted the mayor with a sigh.
The sturdy built latimeria waved to his neighbor and his son as he continued his walk along the neighborhood. “Where'er you boys headed to?”
“The seaside bar?” Eko’s voice became increasingly timid.
“We’re seeing girls today!” Trachea immediately added.
“Oh! Well, remember to use protection!”
“Dad!”
...
Calling… Calling… “Hello?” A muffled voice resembling Rango’s spoke from the other side of the line.
“Hey, where are you man? There’s a ton of girls here!” Ekos responded, a slight firmness in his usually playful voice as he held his phone to the side of his head.
“Agh… Sorry, man, I’m headed to my date right now.”
Ekos froze for a moment, before pressing the speakerphone button and holding the phone out. “You have a date?”
The other two lifted their heads at the mention and leaned in close to the phone.
“Yeah… And she’s a really busy person, so it has to be today… Sorry.”
“Wait, wait, wait, I thought you didn’t have one! You said it yesterday, right?”
“Yeah, but I met her right after I was walking back home. I bumped into her while she was on her night watch and I think I accidentally scared her or something because she started yelling at me, but it wasn’t really that scary because her voice was so cute, so I asked her out, and… yeah. Mom, do you want to say hi to Ekos?”
Another voice was barely picked up through the phone. “Honey, I have to focus on driving.”
“Oh, okay, sorry mom.”
… “Bro, what?”
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Women Fear Me, Fish Love Me
August 1st (1/5)
The shoreside bar at high noon was filled with company, as the hot summer air filled in the steamy, sunburned water jocks from both the land and sea. These beaches have been the haven of peace between the men of surface and ocean for years, through the courtship at the tides, colloquially known as surfing. The fun distorted guitar softly rang out through the speakers, just under the noise of nasally hoarse voices and the impact of cold drinking glasses. A talkative group sat around a commandingly centered table, consisting of two fossils, and two saltwaters; one of them being the son of the late surf legend, who had just walked in to join the circle.
“Ha-Ran-Go in the hut!” A young man with a drink, leaning near the entrance, chanted, spoiling the presence of the Sailfish Surfer junior. A crowd of vocal, yet low-energy cheers echoed all around the bar, causing the sailfish to huff out a chuckle, waving up in recognition. He sat down at the last remaining chair of the table made of darkened pine planks, scanning his eyes around the table to look at his friends, who are all excitedly looking back at him.
“Hey man, finally!” A tall, many finned latimeria threw his arms up, moving his drink hand more carefully.
“How’s it going, Rango?” The lemon shark, sitting left of the sailfish, chimed in.
An anomalocaris idly floats between the two, blankly staring down the table, presumably.
“Ah… It’s been alright, Trachea.” Rango weakly grins. “I was busy helping the guys with organizing the surfboard shop and all that all week, sorry I haven’t been able to meet up here in a while.”
“It’s alright bro, you’re not the only one that missed the high tide. I had to help my girl out with something before coming here.”
“Sex?” The latimeria did not miss a beat.
“Ekos, that was yesterday, and it was with your mom.” The joke from Trachea prompted a laugh from the whole table.
“Come on, man, don’t talk about my friggin’ mom like that!” Ekos reached around the primitive crustacean to punch the shark in his very muscular shoulder.
“Well your mom is a pretty hot business woman.” The words that casually left Rango’s smiling mouth disrupted the table, even the ‘your mom’ joker was left a bit surprised. The sailfish seemed completely oblivious to the odd silence, turning to watch the gruff bartender showing off with his nimble prosthetic arm. “So, yeah… I really need a girlfriend. It’s been a little lonely in my life- I mean, I have you guys, but… you know.”
“Well, I’m sure you can find one super easily, man, just go up to a girl and have a conversation, you’re the Rango!” Ekos enthusiastically reached out an arm in gesture, towards the Rango.
“Yeah dude, you’re a studmuffin. The girls already love you.”
Rango nervously scratched the back of his neck with a bright smile. “Thanks guys… Maybe someday, right?” He turns his attention towards a nearby waiter, who had just finished jotting down the orders from another table. “Excuse me!” He shouted, raising a hand up.
The waiter was a pink haired person, wearing a bright shirt with a flower design, as well as an out of place white fluffy hat with bunny ears. He perked up, briefly staring wide eyed towards Rango before ducking his head down as he made his way towards their table. “How can I help you?”
“Could I also get whatever he’s making?” Rango pointed at the bartender, who's concocting a colorful and tall drink.
He turned to look for a solid 5 seconds, before curtly nodding and walking away, leaving the interaction without making any eye contact during it.
“Uh, okay, thanks…” Rango trailed off as the waiter quickly disappeared from speaking distance.
…“That guy’s still so friggin’ weird, man.”
“Yeah, no idea why Benji still keeps him around, it must be so sweaty under that hat, dude.”
More chapters coming soon!
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