#you know that period of time when he thought Minerva was dead. yeah | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

everythingharrypotterblog · 3 years

Text

charmed [5]: ‘cycle’ (remus lupin x reader)

SMUT. professor! remus x professor!y/n. can be read as a one-shot, or as part 5 of the charmed series :) pls go show part 4 some love, and the rest of the chapters if u liked this! <3

brief summary: full moon approaching= horny as fuck remus. he can’t keep his eyes/hands off y/n, and after a whole day of being needy between classes, they ... ;) dom!remus, oral fem!receiving, fingering, size kink, ye

nsfw gifs for inspo: x x

a/n: i got rejected from my top choice university program today so if im gonna be unhappy, might as well make u guys happy and release parts 5 and 7

series summary: set in the prisoner of azkaban, including its major plot points. remus and y/n get hired by dumbledore last minute to teach at hogwarts, defense against the dark arts and charms respectively. not wanting the students to know they are married, they navigate the challenging year through hidden glances, hand holds underneath the table and loving moments in their offices. even with all their efforts to conceal their relationship, their chemistry does not go unnoticed by the student population of hogwarts, who grow fond of the pair as they offer them some of the best classes they’ve had in a while. their relationship as newlyweds is strengthened as teaching the next generation of wizards unlocks a sea of memories of their love story. for the second time in his life, remus holds hogwarts responsible for some of his happiest memories. he’s given the chance to create them with the love of his life, y/n, who has taught and continues to teach him that every part of him is lovable, remaining forever under her charm.

series masterlist here

join taglist here

Remus’ life was lived in cycles, various phases of the moon commandeering partially how he felt.

His sex drive was always pretty high; how could he not feel desire- when he had Y/N around him in his life. They had a great sex life, and Remus was definitely one to get ‘love boners’, where he would see Y/N do something not remotely suggestive but would get the desire to fuck out of sheer adoration..

When the full moon came close, however… it was on a whole other level. His body carried tension and almost an incurable itch on the days preceding his transformation. His senses flared like a wolf’s, like hearing, touch and vision. It was his sense of smell, however, that enhanced the most. For about 2-5 days leading to the full moon, his smell became much sharper. If Y/N had recently showered, her fresh scent would overwhelm his nostrils, or if she got sweaty too. The second she got aroused, Remus would be able to pick it up, and the urge to bury his face in between her legs would wash over him.

So, he 300% got way hornier during this period of time. Paired up with his senses on overdrive, all he could think about during those few days was sex with Y/N, the tiniest things she did would get him instantly hard. He’d be turned on all the time.

As the month of September came to a close, both Y/N could definitely sense her husband’s even-higher-than-normal yearning. Remus’ persona in public never revealed how much of a beast he could be in the bedroom, always calm, respectful, prudent. He treated Y/N with the upmost care, and once they got to Hogwarts, with the upmost professionalism. That quickly faltered in the last couple of days.

The second students were out of her last class, he had her pushed up against the wall, the door of the classroom safely locked. Y/N even had to cancel one Charms practice session, because Remus wasn’t able to keep his hands off her: pulling her close to him and rubbing her back while he buried his nose in the perfume of her hair. When they graded or read together in the evenings, he would bend her over the desk, then take her again in the shower that night. Every morning, Y/N would wake up in the best way possible, feeling Remus’ tight hold behind her and his already hard cock rutting up against the flesh of her butt.

This morning, however, the couple wasn’t able to squeeze in a nice wake-up shag. They had overslept, and Y/N who started at 9am while Remus at 10, had to to get to class. She hurried off, getting dressed and down for a quick breakfast, leaving Remus waking up alone, humping the sheets slightly.

His frustrations lasted all day, and definitely were not aided when he saw that Y/N was wearing his favourite pair of pants of hers at lunchtime. While the way they looked at each other always somewhat hinted at their romance, Remus’ gaze was especially obvious, like he was mentally undressing her everywhere they went.

He was presently in between classes, sitting at a table in the staff room and trailing his wand over the lines of a student’s essay he was reading. He lifted his head when he heard the door creak open, and Y/N walked in happily, carrying a stack of papers in her hands. His thread was almost thrown back as he caught a whiff of her, just pure her, mixed with a hint of… arousal? She was wet, Remus thought lewdly.

Spotting Remus, Y/N gave him a big smile, then turned towards a little desk that had some of her stuff on it. Remus gave her a cheeky wink before his eyes followed her, unabashedly fixed on how those pants fit her so nicely. Y/N bent down to store the papers into her bag, and Remus quickly had to look away, forcing his gaze on the window before he would get hard.

“Hi, my love.” He smiled gently as she approached him, turning his chair and pulling her onto his lap.

“Rem!” Y/N whispered, jerking her head towards Professor Sprout.

She was the only other teacher there, but to Remus’ greatest delight, she seemed to have snoozed off in her armchair.

“She’s asleep.” Remus whispered back, hands running everywhere on Y/N’s body as she settled herself comfortably in his lap. “Besides, I missed you.”

“Aw, pumpkin-“ Y/N giggled, accepting Remus’ kiss as he pressed his lips on hers. “I, missed, you, too” She murmured in between kisses.

Remus’ hands were getting antsy, as one went to go squeeze Y/N’s breasts and the other caressed over her butt, smoothing over the thin fabric of her dress pants. The kiss deepened as they both began breathing heavier.

“Don’t,” Y/N breathed in, breaking apart from Remus’ soft face. “Don’t you have class in like-“ She glanced at the clock. “5 minutes?!”

Remus peered over her head and groaned, shaking his tousled head. “And you do too darling, right?”

“Yeah, it’s my last one of the day.” Y/N frowned.

Remus’ gaze softened, nuzzling Y/N’s nose with the tip of his own, in a cute little Eskimo kiss- type action.

“I really love these pants, you know, I’m wondering if you wore these on purpose” He grinned, the hand on her butt petting the material softly.

“Maybe, I did….” Y/N smiled back, their faces centimeters away from each other’s.

Remus, ears full of Y/N’s voice, nose full of Y/N’s natural homey scent, didn’t register the door opening again and they both turned with a jolt, when they heard Professor McGonagall clear her throat.

Y/N jumped out of Remus’ lap, Remus smoothing his hands that were all over her body, over his robes.

“Hi, Professor McGonagall- I was just- we were just getting ready for our next l-lesson.” Y/N stammered, face growing hot in embarrassment.

“Yes, class, here- I’ll walk you to your class, darling.” Remus said, bowing his head and following Y/N out of the staff room.

“Mhmm.” Professor McGonagall hummed, peering at the two through her thin rectangle glasses. She didn’t bother reminding them they could call her ‘Minerva’, but as they shuffled out the door, her thin lips curled up in amusement. “Oh, Pomona, I’m sure you are very lucky to be dead asleep right now.” She whispered, to the Herbology teacher whose eyes were sealed shut.

In the hallway, Y/N and Remus burst out laughing once they got a safe distance away.

“I am never going to emotionally recover from that.” Remus choked in between gasps for breath.

“Please, I’m never going to look her in the eye ever again.” Y/N howled, wiping a tear with her wrist. “I mean, at least we were just sitting… and not actually doing.. anything.”

They walked along a couple stairways, their body language having adjusted to the busy Castle.

“Thanks for walking me, you didn’t have to.” Y/N said, once they reached the Charms classroom. She stood back to the door, hands behind her on the doorknob.

Remus simply smiled courteously, eyes drifting down her. Then, quickly, he peered around them and into the classroom. Seeing it was empty, he reached behind Y/N, turned the doorknob and swirled her inside, pressing her up against the door.

“Oh, Rem-“ Y/N squeaked in surprise, but her voice faded into a soft moan as Remus kissed her, her arms going up to wrap around his neck.

“Sorry, my love, I just can’t get enough of you.” Remus chuckled when they finally pulled apart.

“Hmm.” Y/N licked her lips. Feeling Remus casing her in against the door like this, his big build towering over her, made her knees all weak. “Okay, you know the best part about these pants?” She inquired.

“Hmm? Tell me, sweetheart.” Remus mused, eyelids growing heavy as he stared into her face.

She rose on her tippy toes to meet the height of Remus’ ears, “The material is so thin-”

She spun around, facing the door and pressed her backside against Remus’ front, feeling him through his trousers.

Gasping as Remus’ large hands went up to squeeze both her breasts, further pushing her against the door as he pressed himself against her smaller body, she said, “-I have to wear a thong.”

Remus’ hands on her froze, his eyes growing dark. A low growl was ebbing up his throat but before he could respond, Y/N snaked out of his hold.

“Okay, bye honey- have a good class!” Y/N chirped, grinning widely as she opened the door to let a group of students in.

Remus composed himself in a fraction of a second, a hand raking through his hazel locks in attempt to comb them over.

“Hi, Professor Lupin!” Some students said, happy to see him, to which he answered with a polite and kind “Hello, hello!”, and “Hello, Dean!”.

Once Y/N’s class was over, she hurried up to her living quarters. After taking a hot shower, she climbed onto the bed, in nothing but a thong and one of Remus’ big sleeping shirts. She lied down comfortably, fingers toying with the collar as she waited for her husband. He had one other class after hers and should be finished soon.

Accurately enough, Remus’ figure appeared in the fireplace a few minutes later. His footsteps approached the bedroom and as he entered, his belt was already clinking as he was unfastening it with one hand.

“Oh, baby.” He hummed appreciatively as he took in the sight of Y/N, splayed across their bed, thighs balmy and exposed. “Is that my shirt?”

Y/N nodded, appreciating how Remus’ locks of hair had fallen on his forehead, as if he was constantly running his fingers through them- which he did, in attempt to concentrate when he was giving his last lessons of the day.

Gripping the hem, Y/N lifted the shirt off, exposing her naked chest. Remus made a guttural sound as he lunged forward, going to squeeze, lick and suck over her breasts. His hands wandered south, grazing the wet spot on the cotton stripe that covered Y/N’s mound.

“And whose pussy is this, hmm?” Remus snarled slightly, canines shining as his lips curled into an eager smirk.

Y/N licked her lips as she decided not to answer, her eyes had a glint to them when she stared back challengingly at her husband.

Remus raised an eyebrow, but kept an unfazed demeanour. He stepped back from the bed, taking a stand at the edge of it.

“Okay, baby girl, I see how you’re being. Turn around for me.”

Y/N looked up at him excitedly before slowly turning on the bed, onto her stomach.

Remus let out a small appreciative growl at the sight of Y/N’s ass covered only by a thin thong, right in front of him ready for him to ravage.

“Should’ve started with an easier question, kitten- who does this ass belong to?” Remus simpered.

He bent forward to squeeze both cheeks in his large hands, then went on to graze his teeth softly against the flesh of her ass. He could smell her arousal fully now, the scent of her wetness entering his nostrils and clouding his vision.

When Y/N merely arched her lower back to stick our her bum more prominently, wiggling it, Remus cursed. He roughly palmed the flesh before he lifted his hand and delivered a loud swat to it.

Y/N gripped the sheets in her hands as she yelped out of pleasure.

“You like that, don’t you, you wanted a good spanking from daddy, huh?” Remus hummed, rubbing over the spot soothingly.

“Yes.” Y/N breathed out shakily. “Please.”

Remus kneaded the flesh in his hands and reveled in the way it would bounce after he spanked it a few more times.

“Oh darling,” he cooed, bending down to leave a slow trail of kisses up Y/N’s back. “Your little bum looks so cute marked up in pink by my hands.”

The skin had pinked, and a considerable area too, considering how large Remus’ hands were.

“Remus, I’m- I’m so wet for you.” Y/N cried, lifting her lower body weight onto her knees so Remus could see her pussy in the air. Glistening and dripping in arousal.

The sight sent adrenaline down Remus’ groin, his cock now painfully hard and straining against his trousers. He could in a flash, shed his lower layers and pound into Y/N’s cunt as his urges wished him to, but he had to get a taste first.

“Really?” He said as he kneeled down on the side of the bed, now eye-level with Y/N’s core. He peeled back her thong, throwing it further on the bed.

“Yes, oh God, please.”

Remus peered over Y/N’s legs to see her face, scrunched up in anticipation. His hands trailed over the side of her thighs, sending visible shivers down her spine.

“Now, will you be a good girl and tell me… who this pretty ass and pussy belong to?” He said in a low purr, voice husky.

Y/N’s pussy clenched as she felt his face so close to where she needed him to be, his hands cementing themselves around her legs.

“Yours, Remmy, I’m all yours, now please-“ she begged, tears prickling at her eyes because of how much she ached for his touch.

Remus’ hands softly grazed down her back and pressed harshly once they got to the lower part where the curve of her ass began, and pulled her cunt straight into his face.

“Merlin, you smell so fucking sweet.” He swooned, inhaling deeply before quite literally diving into her cunt, his warm tongue stretching to lick against her clit.

Y/N’s eyes rolled back, her head pressing harder into the pillow. “Fuck…” She choked out. Her hips gyrated against Remus’ face, but his firm hold locked her in place as he devoured her.

They both moaned, Remus’ tongue running up her slit a couple times to lap up all the slickness and fully taste it. He gave her clit a quick kiss before sucking on it, taking it in between his lips.

“Fuck, r-right there.” Y/N breathed out, finally feeling an ounce of her desire fulfilled.

Remus licked sloppily at her clit, drawing wet circles with his tongue as his entire face was engulfed in her, her wetness dripping and coating his chin and nose. He sighed contently, closing his eyes as he ate her out, his own cock plumping at the feeling of her hips and legs trembling.

It was like meditation, the wolf inside him finally somewhat being appeased. He lapped at her cunt like it was the last thing he’d ever do, tongue running through the soft folds that were sopping and slick from the mix of her arousal and his spit.

“Oh, Rem, oh-“ Y/N moaned, face scrunched in pleasure. The coil in her abdomen wound tighter, she was getting closer and she pushed her hips back against Remus’ mouth. He groaned into her cunt, his hands squeezing her fleshy hips harder, desperately stuffing his face into her. He loved it.

He maintained his rhythm, focusing on suckling and flicking his tongue on her clit until she came with a cry, hips shaking out of his hold. He flattened his tongue to run it up her labia, and ended by planting a tender kiss on her sensitive clit before pulling away, slightly more sated than before.

“Delicious.” Remus panted, standing up and watching Y/N languidly turn over onto her back once again. He wiped his mouth and the tip of his nose clean with the back of his hand, Y/N watching with her face hot.

Y/N scooted to sit at the edge of the bed, ogling him. He towered over her as he stayed standing, looking down at her through heavy hungry eyelids, covered by his brown hair that was getting slightly messier.

“Wanna taste you.” Y/N smiled, reaching behind Remus’ kneecaps to bring him closer.

Remus chuckled darkly, his long arm needing to barely reach to stroke Y/N’s jaw.

“You look so cute from up here, dove, makes me want to play with you and see you cum, all over again.” He said, voice low.

Y/N bit her lip, not breaking eye contact with her husband.

“So gorgeous.” He groaned as Y/N took his thumb between her lips, suckling the pad of the finger. “You have no idea how much I’ve been thinking.. of what I want to do to you, how much I want to take that body of yours.”

“Then take me.” Y/N exhaled, mouth letting go of his thumb and smiling devilishly.

Remus’ eyes, if possible, turned darker in desire and he bent down, kissing Y/N passionately on the lips as his hands travelled down her naked torso.

“Hmm, you’re so small, kitten,” Remus hummed, eyes following his hand that went to cup in between her legs. “Look how small your little pussy is in my hand.”

His fingers curled to feel how wet it was, Y/N spreading her thighs apart for him to access easier. He used his middle and ring finger to lather up some of her slickness, then dragged them up to her clit and started soft circles on it. Y/N whimpered, legs closing from how sensitive her bud was from her previous orgasm.

“Now, now pet.” Remus tutted, pulling away.

He licked the tips of his fingers clean, then shrugged off his woolly cardigan, hanging it on the back of a nearby chair. The full moon approaching always got his body temperature hotter than usual, so he skipped wearing a cloak today, and was left in his white dress shirt and tie. He slowly rolled up his sleeves, exposing his forearms. Y/N couldn’t keep her eyes off his hands as he did so. Long, mature fingers with metal rings adorning the base of each.

“Keep your legs nice and spread f’me, alright, as I stuff you with my fingers.”

Bending forward again, he leaned one arm on the bed beside Y/N as his other hand found her clit again. The thick pads of his fingers played with her clit, rubbing the spot as Y/N bit her lip, body firing up for another orgasm.

“So cute, button.” He mused, nuzzling the top of Y/N’s head. “Look at that, your clit feels so little under my fingers, don’t you think? And your cunt, ah-“

He dipped a finger inside her, sliding right in and quickly added another one. Slowly petting the soft spongy walls of Y/N’s pussy, Y/N mewled, rutting her hips for more.

“So tight, so full just of my fingers. Tell me darling, do you like my fingers?”

“Mhhm.” Y/N nodded as Remus sped up. “Love your fingers, your hands, they’re so b-big.” She choked out, head hanging back as he fingered her.

“You like that? You fucking love how I can get you off with just m’fingers, yeah? Lord, this pussy’s so tight how will my cock even fit hmm?” Remus crooned, watching Y/N adoringly as he was knuckles deep inside her, his rings feeling cold upon her entrance.

Y/N opened her eyes, meeting Remus’ soft, scar-decorated face and turned her head to kiss him. Remus suckled on her spit-slicked lips, maintaining his fingers and bent his hand for the bone of his palm to press against her clit. Y/N gasped into the kiss, lips gaped apart as she whimpered into Remus’ mouth. Remus smiled, loving how flustered she was as she struggled to kiss him back, soaking in all her little cries and noises she made.

His fingers inside her were going so fast, relentlessly hitting her g-spot over and over that his hard palm was grinding against her clit incessantly. Faster than the first time, she came, squeezing onto his forearm.

Fingers riding out her high, they slowed and pulled out, drenched in her wetness. Y/N collapsed onto her back, chest heaving.

“Oh, baby you are so beautiful.” Remus simpered, climbing on the bed and leaning over her to kiss her everywhere; her shoulders, neck, cheeks. “You think you got another one in you, bunny? Think you can let Moony bury his cock inside you?”

“Yes, give it to me please.” Y/N grinned widely, licking her lips and pulled Remus down by his tie, locking lips with him once more. “Need you inside me.”

“Oh, puppy. I am going to ruin you.” Remus said, this time in such a low murmur that had he not been an inch close to Y/N’s face, her ears wouldn’t have registered the tone.

Y/N sat up, helping her husband rid himself of his clothes. His bare chest exposed a few thin scars, which Y/N quickly smoothed her hands and lips over, routinely giving love to them, as she knew it was the part Remus couldn’t stand of his body.

Remus freed his hard-on, which was blushed an angry shade of dark pink. The bulbous head had been leaking of precum for a while now, and he exhaled a couple ragged breaths when he stroked himself, hand twisting around his tip. Y/N had leaned over to their bedside table to open a condom, and she replaced his hand with hers, pumping his long member before sliding it on. Remus already felt himself throb, and he knew that soon he’d be even more as Y/N’s pussy felt 100 times better than her hand.

“How do you want me?” Y/N breathed, backing up to the head of the bed as Remus went on his knees.

This was more of a rhetorical question, really, as it has been like this for years, that at every moon cycle end, their favourite was for Remus to take Y/N from behind. Y/N turned onto her elbows and knees, bending forward to prop her ass up.

“That’s it, good girl.” Remus licked his lips, lining himself up and pushed his cock slowly into Y/N’s warmth.

He let out a loud hiss, face contorted in pleasure as he sank fully into her, his long, hard member stretching Y/N out to the fullest, filling her to the brim. “Merlin.” He said through gritted teeth, eyes dropping to where he disappeared into Y/N’s behind. “You always manage to stay so tight for me, darling- fuck, your pussy’s just squeezing m’cock so right, isn’t it?”

Y/N merely moaned, head dropping forward as she balanced her upper weight on her elbows, overwhelmed by feeling every single vein of Remus’ cock sliding in and out of her slowly. She clenched hard around him, causing his hips to tremor as Remus’ senses, including touch, were amplified tenfold.

He ceased momentarily, his cock just resting heavy inside Y/N’s cunt, his head deep at her g-spot. Y/N mewled, arching her back and twerked her hips, fucking herself back onto his cock. Remus growled at the sight, spanked her once, then his hands dived to grab the curve of her waist as he snapped, hips pounding into her now mercilessly.

“Oh God, fuck!” Y/N cried out with her head thrown back, as her elbows gave out from underneath her and her face sank forward into a heap of pillows. Her ass still up in the air, flesh slightly pink from Remus’ spanks delivered to it- it was a wonder how he didn’t cum from the sight of that alone as he fucked her from behind.

Remus kept up his quick rhythm, hips thrusting into her ruthlessly. They were both close, and Remus fucked into Y/N without an ounce or self-restraint left. He grunted loudly as she fell forward and her inner walls clenching down onto his member. His cock slipped in and out of her deliciously, as she had gotten so wet for him, sinful sounds echoing the room.

He bent forward, chest pressing against her back, their skin sweaty.

“‘S that feel good, darling?” Remus said, lips ghosting over Y/N’s ear. She shuddered, his breath sending shivers up her neck as she felt him so close. His voice wasn’t his usual chesty, tenor honey-like. His words were uttered in a guttural one, his voice deeper, lower, sounding from the back of his throat. “You’re taking me so well- your pussy feels like heaven, sweetheart.”

Y/N’s ears registered the praise as music, living for it. He adjusted his hips slightly to accommodate the new angle, thrusting to make sure he was hitting all the spots in Y/N he knew she liked.

“Mphhhm, please baby,” Y/N moaned, voice slightly muffled into the pillow. She turned her head to the side to rest her cheek on it instead. “Please Remus, oh-“ her voice whimpered, a little more clearly now.

Remus’ large hands had been gripping onto the flesh of Y/N’s hips roughly, tightly. He moved one up to her breasts, grabbing it and massaging it. His breath was hot on her back. He was nearing his orgasm too, his breathing loud and shaggy. Heaving grunts echoed off the walls of the rooms, and Y/N arched her back to feel his chest rise up and down against it.

“Good girl, good fucking girl- taking my cock so well. Shit.”

Remus let out a growl as he felt his cock be swallowed up in her cunt, her ribbed walls enveloping it so nicely as he ploughed into her.

“You’re close aren’t you, dove?” He murmured into her neck with the same low voice, placing wet kisses onto it. Her hair was out of the way onto the other side, and he tasted the slight stickiness of how sweaty their night’s activities had gotten her.

“Yes, yes, ye-es” Y/N chanted in a strangled voice, her words getting split at her throat from Remus’ vigorous pounding.

“Can tell from how tightly you’re squeezing me- shit, not going to last long either inside you like this. C’mon baby, c’mon. Cum for me.”

It was all too much. Y/N shaked as she felt Remus pump into her a few more crucial times. He felt so thick in her walls, his girth filling her up like no other. Moaning, her hips grinded back into Remus as she started to cum. She felt his warm hand reach down her belly and down to between her thighs and with the added pressure from the circles he rubbed on her clit, she came with a shudder. Her body shook as her breath caught in her throat, a string of profanities leaving her lips. Y/N’s sounds of pleasure filled Remus’ ears, driving him further into ecstasy.

“Good girl.” Remus purred, hips jerking forward frantically.

“Remus, fill me up-“ Y/N moaned, knowing Remus loved hearing his name fall off her tongue like that. She propped herself back onto her elbow, reaching one hand behind her to hold the back of Remus’ neck.

Remus pressed the side of his face into Y/N’s neck, her hand keeping him close to her. He growled into her ear, the low sound vibrating from his throat enough to make Y/N’s eyes roll back. Driving his cock into her, desperately chasing his high, he rutted his cock into her walls. His entire body strained as all his muscles worked to relieve himself, needily fucking out his animalistic urges. He came with a gasp, his hips jerked harshly as he shot ropes and ropes of cum into the condom.

Panting, he hunched forward as his cock kept twitching.

His whole muscular body trembled as he squeezed his eyes shut in the pleasure of his long-needed release. His hand was grasped onto Y/N’s chest and she loved the feeling, tilting her hips forward to match the movements of Remus’ orgasm.

Wheezing slightly, Remus finally pulled out of her slowly, Y/N whimpering slightly as her pussy clenched around nothing. He threw the used condom and collapsed onto his back, chest still heaving. Y/N followed suit beside him, onto her stomach, body limp. The afterwaves of her orgasm still sent pleasure through her body and she knew she’d feel too sore to even straighten her legs.

“My love.” Remus turned on his side.

“I can’t fucking move.” Y/N chuckled, voice muffled by the pillow.

Remus hummed, eyes raking over her used body and sat up, massaging over her shoulders then down her back. His hands reached her hips, where he caressed extra soothingly and slowly closed them together. He bent forward, planting a kiss on Y/N’s cheek. She giggled as his locks of hair tickled her eyelid.

Languidly turning over, Y/N sighed in content.

Remus reached his hand, and pulled a strand of her hair out of her face, tucking it behind his ear. He felt warmth lower, as his body began to awaken for another round.

“We’re not getting much sleep tonight, huh?” Y/N giggled peering down at her husband.

It was a blessing that the Castle automatically out a Silencing charm on teachers’ living quarters, because anyone neighbouring them would have stayed up, hearing sinful, wet slapping sounds of skin all night.

part 6 and part 7 OUT NOW!!

tags @bicyhot1 @pink-hufflepuff @legitlaughingflamingo @brod16 @gerardonmyway @blueleonor @suranne-doesstuff @rxmusblxck @spxllcxstxr @littleemo477 @just12randomfandoms @svnkissdd @norrreee @m4r13l3y @jess6578 @rorysreallyrandom @the-nightingale-not-the-lark @archeve19 @wolfstarslovechild @pan-pride-12 @x4kai4x @chrrybmb-mp3 @reggieluna @happyslittlekitten @missemilygilmore @all-things-fictional @strangefirething @abitofeverythinggg @yeahshewayout @imfreeeeeee123 @harold-pothead @lunnybunny12 @ellieblack11 @tugabooos @joyfulbiscuit @justonemorechapter07 @wonderwoman292 @skateb0red @secretsthathauntus @siriusblackswhoree @sabonbonn @untraveled-road @annabeljareau @valiantobservationkitty @diffbeanofbrand @theeicedamericano @spencerreidlove @flannellover67 @wishiwasdeadric @becks7401 @katsav17 @emmy-kitty13 @purritoqueen @girl22334 @monicafebyana @talsiaa @sierrax023 @axva03 @uhh-dk @nataliahgrace

#remus lupin smut #charmed #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin fanfic #professor lupin x reader #Professor Remus Lupin #professor lupin smut

585 notes · View notes

flouncingwiz-sevsnape · 4 years

Text

Cards and Kisses

Request: Hi! Was wondering if I could request something where the reader is a professor like snape (like charms or dada or something) and they're like close friends but both have a crush on each other and snape asks her out after dumbledore and mcgonagall are like 'just do it' and for it to be super fluffy and cute 😊😊😊 thank you so much!!!

A/N: I really liked this idea, so hope that you like the result! Please feel to keep requesting- I’m always ready to try out new stuff!

On a different note, I am going to be working on a Part 2 to “Enough Energy,” so stay tuned!

Snape X Reader (professor)

Warnings: fluff

Ever since your first day at Hogwarts, you and Severus had hit it off. He was ordered by Dumbledore to give you the grand tour, and at first he seemed very resigned about the whole thing. His intimidating energy and sneers didn’t scare you though, for some reason it all seemed like an act. Instead of cowering under his snide comment about the post of Defence Against the Dark Arts being cursed, you shot back a playful retort about asking for a raise if that were the case, and Snape couldn’t help but chuckle. Since then, you two had become very close friends and never failed to make fun of the other playfully. Besides providing a refreshing amount of sarcastic comments and angry remarks, Severus had, unexpectedly, been your closest confidante. During your night patrol wanderings, you two often met up and talked all through the night. Both of you knew everything about each others’ pasts and all their darkest secrets. After all that, it didn’t surprise you when you started feeling something more than friendship for the Potions Master. You were, without a doubt, sure that he only saw you as a friend though, so you did your best to control your emotions and keep things normal.

It was mid-afternoon on Halloween and spirits were high all throughout the castle. You had just finished up a class with a group of first years and had a free period. Deciding to grab some coffee as a pick me up before your advanced class with seventh years, you made your way towards the staff lounge. You heard Severus and Minerva in the middle of a heated debate, but they quickly halted their conversation as you strolled through the door. Minerva was smirking and Severus sitting in a chair, arms crossed and fuming. You caught his eye and laughed for no reason. He shot you a look of contempt and he stood to pour himself some more coffee.

‘Not still sulking about the Gryffindors’ big win yesterday, Sev?’ You playfully shouldered him out of the way of the coffee and helped yourself before he could. You cocked an eyebrow and triumphantly raised your cup to your lips. Without replying, Severus flicked his wand lazily and coffee splashed all down your robes.

He tutted with false pity, ‘Uh oh. Ever the clumsy one, aren’t you, y/n?’

Cursing under your breath you pointed your wand at yourself and muttered ‘Scourgify.’ Instead of refilling your now empty mug, you set it on the counter and snatched Snape’s out of his hands as you passed him, sauntering over to the couch. Minerva uttered a soft noise of amusement before returning her attention to The Daily Prophet. Severus sat himself down next to you with a regal look about him, eyes set dead ahead. You rolled your eyes at him, knowing full well he was going to try and ignore you until you apologised. ‘Such a drama queen,’ you thought, smirking. You took a long sip from Snape’s mug and then turned, offering him some as an olive branch. He continued to glare straight ahead, but a small tug at his lip was a dead giveaway that he was not angry at all. You scooted towards him, grabbed his jaw and began lifting the mug ceremoniously towards his lips. When it was an inch away, Severus jerked out of your grip and turned to face you, a smirk on his lips and his dark eyes dancing.

‘Don’t patronise me, I am perfectly capable of drinking myself,’ and he plucked the coffee from you, ‘thank you very much.’ You merely scoffed and shot him a playful sideways glance.

You locked eyes and time stopped. Mug hovering by his lips, Severus’ eyes bore into you with such intense passion you were sure you were imagining things. In the blink of an eye, your trance was broken and Snape was boredly drinking his coffee. What had just happened? Surely he couldn’t feel that way about you… could he? You cleared your throat and stood up, watching Severus curiously.

‘Well, I’d better be off. Minerva,’ you nodded to her before turning to Snape with a smirk, ‘enjoy the coffee, Sev.’ He sneered, but waved goodbye nevertheless. You hurried out of the room breathlessly, mind racing with thoughts of Severus.

Snape held his breath as he watched her go, exhaling when she was gone. Why had she hurried out so quickly? And why did she look at him with so much emotion? Could Minerva and Albus, perhaps, be correct? Severus sighed, knowing full well that when he turned around, Minerva would be shooting him a look that screamed I-told-you-so. As if on cue, McGonagall cleared her throat and said in a triumphant voice, ‘Well Severus, what have I been saying? She clearly fancies you too, just ask her out, for Merlin’s sake!’

Severus shot her a hard look that said drop it. ‘Y/n fancies me no more than she does Albus,’ he deadpanned, boredly glancing down at a copy of The Quibbler that lay on the coffee table. Even as he said it, though, his heart beat faster and he wondered if that were entirely true. There definitely had been some sort of spark between you just now.

‘Well I think you’re wrong,’ Minerva started towards the door, ‘and Albus does too!’ she added, pausing by the couch. ‘Severus, all I’m saying is that you never know until you try,’ she gave him a hard thwack on the shoulder with the rolled up Prophet, ‘and you’d be a blithering idiot not to!’ With that, she swept out of the room, leaving Snape to brood in silence.

The feast had been a success, and as you headed down to the staff lounge for the annual Halloween staff party, you were overcome with a bubbly feeling of excitement. You planned on talking to Severus about your interaction earlier, and depending on how strong an influence the firewhisky had, even mentioning your feelings to him. The lounge was decorated with miniature pumpkins and tiny bats fluttered around the ceiling. You grinned and made a beeline towards the refreshments, pouring yourself a generous amount of firewhisky, before striking up conversation with Filius. Severus had not yet arrived, he was probably still patrolling the dungeons. You had left your post a little early, and a brief twinge of guilt was washed down by a large sip of firewhisky. The drink had started to take its effect, a warm buzz filling you up as you finished your conversation with Flitwick and walked, a bit tipsy, towards the couch. You flopped down and saw Albus was occupying the chair adjacent to you and you decided to chat with him.

‘Hello Albus, happy Halloween!’

‘And the same to you, y/n,’ he raised his cup to you, a knowing twinkle in his eye. ‘Minerva tells me you and Severus had an interesting interaction earlier,’ he looked at you with a hint of curiosity etched into his lined face.

You downed the last of your drink before speaking, a small blush creeping onto your cheeks, although whether it was because of the firewhisky or the mention of Severus, you didn’t know. ‘Ah, yes. He and I enjoy our jokes,’ you replied nonchalantly, but somehow you knew that the coffee was not what Dumbledore had been referring to.

‘Hmm,’ was all he said, his eyes trained on something behind you. You threw a tentative glance over your shoulder and saw Severus being talked to by a rather jovial Hagrid, a look of absolute contempt on his face. You smirked and turned back to the headmaster, ‘speak of the Devil, huh? Excuse me Albus.’ His eyes twinkled and he inclined his head, but did not say anything else. You got up and bounced towards Severus and Hagrid.

‘Hey Hagrid, mind if I borrow this moody oversized bat from you?’ You motioned towards Severus.

Hagrid squinted down, as if he was confused. ‘Wha? Oh yeh mean Sev’rus?’

‘Oh! That’s who this is?’ Snape shot you an angry glare and you smirked back.

‘Yeah, I reckon you can talk to him.’

‘Cheers!’ You grabbed Severus by the hand and dragged him towards the couch.

‘Oversized bat?’ he deadpanned as he sat down next to you, rather rigidly.

‘Oh come on Sev, I’m just messing around!’ You flopped drunkenly onto his shoulder and giggled. You had suddenly come up with a great plan to act way more drunk than you were. He shot you a sideways glare but did not push you off of him.

‘A little tipsy, are we?’ A sardonic smile flashed across his face.

‘Just a teensy, weensy bit,’ you giggled with false inebriation.

‘Merlin save me.’ Snape rolled his eyes, but he still had an amused look about him. Just as you opened your mouth to bring up this morning’s event, Albus’ voice rang out over the chatter. He was standing next to Minerva, looking as though he had just finished a conspiratorial conversation with her. McGonagall wore a composed look of satisfaction as Dumbledore began to address the staff. ‘I have just now had a rather peculiar idea,’ he blue eyes sparkled excitedly in the dim room, ‘I believe it would be beneficial if we played a game as a staff. To bond.’ He had a warm smile on his face, ‘so if you would all please circle up around the coffee table and I will explain the rules.’

You and Severus remained seated as the rest of the staff gathered around. A low groan of annoyance escaped Snape’s lips and he began to stand, clearly keen on escaping the impending game. ‘Now, now Severus, everyone should play,’ Albus called out merrily as he settled himself on a pouf between Minerva and Hagrid (who looked obtrusive). Snape gave a resigned sigh, shot you an irritated look and crossed his arms like a frustrated teenager.

‘The rules of this game are simple, and I am sure many of you have played it in your youth. It’s called Kiss the Card, rather similar to the Muggle drinking game of Suck and Blow. I will start with a Chocolate Frog card on my lips and pass it to Minerva, who will then pass it to Filius and so on, all the way around the circle. Whenever anybody drops the card, they have to wear a Chocolate Frog on their head for the remainder of the evening!’ A collective burst of laughter erupted from the staff at this. ‘Shall we begin?’ Albus pulled a card out of his sleeve and sucked it to his lips, passing it to Minerva. You watched, amused, as the card made its way around the staff, slipping once between Sybil and Argus, but still well on its way towards you.

Suddenly you realised that Severus would be passing the card to you, and your stomach lurched. You were going to be pressed close to him, and taking a card from his lips. Gosh, just the thought gave you butterflies. He seemed to have realised this too because he kept glancing nervously at you, despite his unamused expression.

Seconds later, the card was being passed from Pomona Sprout to Severus, and you watched with bated breath, half hoping they’d drop it, half hoping they wouldn’t. Although Snape seemed extremely reluctant, he had managed to take the card from Sprout and was now turning to face you. You locked eyes and a flash of heat ran through your body. Severus’ eyes were glittering and he wore a nervous scowl, card still attached to his lips. You composed yourself and leaned in close, still fixated on his eyes. The card was inching towards your lips and you parted your mouth slightly, ready to receive it from him. It all happened in a heartbeat, just as you felt the card skim your lips, you saw Minerva shift in your seat and the card dropped down as if by magic. It fell in slow motion. Severus stopped moving, but you continued to lean in and press your mouth against his, almost instinctively.

For a moment, everything froze. You felt Snape go rigid. Your heart was pounding. Then, with certain reluctance, he kissed you back. You melted in to him, lips locked for what felt like eternity; you could feel him smirking against your mouth. You pulled back from him a grin stretched across your face, and glanced around the room. Everyone was watching you with shocked expressions, everyone except Minerva and Albus who were smiling mischievously.

‘Ah, brilliant, what a way to end the game!’ Dumbledore reminisced, and gave you a quick wink before continuing, ‘but now, the frogs.’ He waved his hand and two Chocolate Frogs appeared hovering over your and Severus’ heads. You shot him a rueful smile as he glared up at the candy animal.

‘I really don’t think this is necessary, Albus,’ said Snape, frustratingly trying to swat the frog away.

‘Oh, but those are the rules of the game, Severus,’ his eyes were twinkling again, ‘now, back to the normal merriment of the party! Pip pip!’ Nevertheless, Albus waved his hand and the frogs disappeared, thankfully. Moments later, everyone dispersed, still smiling and delighted by the fact that you and Severus had just kissed. You were too.

A shadow loomed over you, stirring you from your thoughts, and you looked up to see Severus staring down at you, lips pressed together seriously. He jerked his head and spun around, stalking into a dark corner of the room. Tentatively, you got up and walked over to him, hands shaking. He was going to say that you shouldn’t have kissed him and that you could only be friends, you just knew it. And yet, as you approached him, his eyes were dancing passionately, and his hands were clasped nervously. He began to pace back and forth silently, you just watched him, the tension between you two building with every second. Finally, he stopped and whipped around to face you, opening his mouth to speak.

You cut in before he could utter a word, ‘Sev, I’m sorry I kissed you. Please don’t be angry with me.’

‘Angry?’ His eyes shifted between his hands and your eyes as he continued, ‘did Minerva put you up to this? Or was it Albus?’ His voice was calm and almost bored sounding, but his eyes were glittering. You looked at him, now very confused.

‘No, of course they didn’t. Why would they?’ You stepped forward and touched his hand, taking a deep breath before continuing. ‘Listen, Sev, I’ve been meaning to tell you for some time, and I guess the cat’s out of the bag now,’ every muscle in his body froze except his lips, which were pressed taut. ‘I,’ you took a deep breath, ‘have feelings for you. And I think I have for some time now.’ You exhaled and looked away from him, withdrawing your hand. Waiting for him to call you foolish and mock you, you were surprised when you felt a hand reach for yours. Looking up, you saw Severus step forward, a very grave look on his face.

‘Y/n,’ he began, voice unwavering and serious as ever, ‘are you certain? I think at this moment it’s imperative for you to be honest.’ You couldn’t speak so you nodded vigorously.

He exhaled and tugged at his robes before going on, ‘Really?’ An unidentifiable emotion flashed across his face, but the next second he closed his eyes and scoffed. ‘I can’t believe I am saying this, but… so do I.’

Snape’s words hit you like a wave and an intoxicating combination of joy and relief washed over you. ‘How could you have hidden that from me, Sev? I can usually read you like a book!’ You gave him a playful smack on the chest, and he seized your arm instantly.

Severus tutted, ‘now, now, violence is not tolerated here at Hogwarts. Surely as a professor, you would know that, y/n?’ He tugged you close to him, breath hot against your face, ‘and you underestimate me. I am, as you know, an esteemed Occlumens and I-’

You cut him off before he could go on making excuses, ‘you were embarrassed, weren’t you?’ Snape’s eyes hardened and a playful sneer appeared on his lips. He opened his mouth to speak, but you cut him off again, this time with a kiss.

You spent the remainder of the evening lounging on the couch in each other’s arms, talking and laughing. Severus, initially a bit reluctant about the publicity, relaxed after a few rounds of drinks. In a corner, unnoticed by either of you, Minerva and Albus were celebrating.

‘Well, Minerva, I’d say we are quite the team,’ Albus chuckled, raising his glass.

‘Indeed, we are. Good idea, the game.’ McGonagall inclined her head at him.

‘Ah, yes, I was quite satisfied by that stroke of brilliance, but that’s nothing compared to your subtle wandwork that caused the card to fall. Very nicely done.’ They locked eyes and laughed heartily.

The party went on into the night, everybody very happy, indeed.

#severus snape #snape #snapedom #Pro Snape #snape fluff #severus x reader #snape imagine #snape x reader #hp fanfic #halfblood prince

171 notes · View notes

saiilorstars · 4 years

Text

Next Stop, Everywhere

Chapter 15: The Losses and the Gains

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: Female OC x 10th Doctor

(Minerva’s face claim: Victoria Camacho)

~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~

Chapter summary: To help Minerva finally open up about her past, the Doctor takes her to a Guinguette where the trio can relax and give Minerva their full support.

// Story Masterlist //

I couldn't maintain my sobs under a low volume as I stood in front of my big sister's gravestone. I think my eyes were literally water-wells because the amount of water that streamed down from them were ridiculous, but then again...this was Olivia. Liv. My sister...and she was dead.

"Go ahead," the Doctor urged me, gesturing for me to do what we had come to do.

He had brought me to the one place that could potentially pave the way for my 'recuperation': Olivia's burial site. He and Martha stood behind me while I stared endlessly at Liv's tombstone. I don't know how, but I managed to tell Martha the same story I told the Doctor. And to my luck, she didn't reject me either. She was with the Doctor on this one; I had been wronged, not the other way around. But more importantly, forgetting who was right and wrong, they both comforted me and helped me stand where I am now, the one place I had never been to despite all the traveling I did.

When my mother prevented me from attending Olivia's burial, I thought I'd never gather my courage to come on my own later on. Because as time went by, I was sure that it was my fault Liv was in a coffin and buried. I felt like I'd be a hypocrite for coming to mourn her. I felt like she would judge me from above, and if she could, she'd order me to leave her alone. So when the Doctor told me where we were going, I was initially very resistant to it. But he told me that I was wrong, that everything I thought about Liv was just wrong. He said, if I wanted to be okay, I had to come here. I had to start by finally mourning her.

But the question that burned in my head was...would I ever be okay? Would I ever be fine?

I stepped up and knelt down, placing an orange tulip on Liv's tombstone, her favorite flower, "Olivia, it's me...Joyce, like you used to call me, huh? I forgot about that nickname. I seem to have a thousand, honestly. I know I never came here before, but I hope you're not too angry with me. You know how Mom can be. But honestly, I was afraid to come here. I think you're judging me, calling me a hypocrite because it's my fault you're here...buried..." I paused, swallowing very hard, "...but I just want to say, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for everything I said to you. I was just a jealous kid. Mom and dad always prioritized their time for you and work, and I was so jealous..." I shook my head, looking back and realizing just how bad I was to her at times, "...but it wasn't your fault. You were a good sister, even if we weren't very close, you were different from Mom and Dad. You tried to help me when I needed it, even when I was that annoying little sister that bugged you," I smiled a little, wiping some tears off my face, "But just know that...I'm so sorry, please forgive me." That was the last I could say before I burst into sobs.

"C'mon," the Doctor helped me up, keeping me right beside him and holding my hand, "She knows it's not your fault."

"But what if she doesn't? What if she thinks I killed her too?"

"She can't," Martha said, taking my other hand, "She doesn't."

The Doctor agreed, nodding his head, "Olivia Souza is much smarter than that. She would never think her little sister killed her."

"I miss her so much, Doctor, so much," I covered my mouth and muffled more sobs.

"It's okay," he turned and hugged me, "Just mourn her, let go of your guilt."

I felt like an utter child the way I sobbed, but neither he nor Martha reprimanded me for it. Instead, Martha moved over and joined the hug, both gripping me tightly, like one small family.

~0~

"Minerva, you can't keep this up," the Doctor warned as I was brought to the console room by Martha, practically by the hair.

"I want to go back to my room. I need to finish my school work that I still haven't returned," I cried, releasing myself from Martha's grip.

"I doubt the little work you brought with us from the hospital takes you a full week to finish," the Doctor said, getting a sharp look from me, "You've locked yourself in your room doing school work with no breaks. You can't do that!"

"It's not healthy," Martha said softly, "You've got to talk to us."

"What I need to do is get back to work," I snapped, "I need to be forgiven."

"Olivia has-"

"She's not the one I'm talking about," I cut the Doctor off, "I should've told you this but then again I thought you would've realized it too. I bury myself in work so that I can forget. Liv will never forgive me as well as my mother, but maybe, maybe my grandmother will. But I just need to work hard," I swallowed hard, another round of tears making its way to my eyes, "I need to work."

"Minerva that's not healthy," Martha repeated, much more concerned, "Self blame, withdrawing, anger is part of psychological tr-"

"It's MY FAULT!" I shouted at her, making her jump, "It's my fault, and I have to make up for it," I turned and hurried off for my room.

"Minerva!" the Doctor called, following after me, "Minerva!"

"Leave me alone! I don't want to do it anymore!"

"Do what?" he caught up in one, two and turned me around.

I looked up with glossy eyes, taking everything I had not to cry anything, not in front of him, "This," I gestured to us, "I can't..."

"I'm not following," he eyed me with confusion.

"I don't want to cry in front of you anymore," I confessed, "I feel like I could re-fill the river Thames we drained up with Donna after all the crying I've done. It embarrasses me that you've seen me like this. You weren't supposed to. I was just supposed to tell you what happened to Liv and then move on like I did with Jackie and Mickey. But you make me go in depth and tel you everything and I makes me cry," I quickly rubbed off said tears, "I wanna talk to you but I don't want to cry anymore."

"We can work with that," he declared, looking like an idea had just sparked in his head, "We'll talk, and I know just the place. A lively place where the only thing you can do is smile, laugh, eat, or dance. Or all of the above!"

"I'm not up for any of that, Doctor," I shook my head.

"Go to the wardrobe and dress for 1848."

" I don't-"

"I know you love playing dress up in that room so go and pick out a dress or I will go in myself and take out the first thing I see and I guarantee you will not like it so go," he pointed ahead, acting so authoritative it was actually kind of amusing I just had to smile a little, "Heeey, you're smiling!'

"I don't know how you do that," I shook my head.

"It's a gift," he shrugged and turned me for the wardrobe room, "Now go."

"But I don't want to-"

"Yes, you do, now go!"

"But what about Martha?"

"Oh yes! Go get her too! 1848, remember that."

"Where are we going?"

He grinned deviously, "My secret."

"But-"

"Just go or I'll choose the dress, and trust me-"

"I don't want that to happen, yeah," I rolled my eyes and started for Martha, "I got it.

Whatever this Martian had in mind, I was so not in the mood for it.

~0~

"There, you look pretty," Martha complemented, pushing part of my hair over my shoulder and moving aside to allow me to see myself in the mirror.

As much as I hated the idea of going somewhere, the Doctor was right, I did love playing dress up with the wardrobe room. The fact there were clothes from all types of historical periods fascinated me! At times, the Doctor would often be searching for me only to find me lounging around, picking out clothes I would wear on our next trips. Though because this was a sudden trip, an unexpected one, I wasn't entirely sure what to wear - that the fact that my head couldn't deal with such petty things. But Martha stepped in, and she took care of it, as usual.

Right now, I wore an ankle-length, midnight blue dress of organza silk. Its long-sleeves were laced up and reached to my wrists. The dress was in a v-neckline manner and the bodice area was black and laced up as well; the same type of black lace outlined the the dress' hemline. The skirt was in a tulle style with many flounce layers to expand and make the dress wider as it would belong to the 1840s. My hair cascaded down with only two twists on either side of my hair, held up with black pins.

"Do you think it needs earrings?" Martha asked, now checking herself in the mirror.

She wore an elegant, deep red dress. It was another long-sleeve, with a red and black pattern adorning her arms and, bodice area, and skirt. It was a straight across neckline style with a small, black necklace falling above it. Along the hemlines was a shiny, black silk laced pattern. Her hair was picked up and even curled at the end. She looked stunning!

"Whatever you do, Martha, you'll look great," I shrugged, watching her choosing between two pairs of black earrings, "But I think the people in that time didn't really care about them."

"Yeah, or didn't know what they were," she chuckled and set the boxes down, "Change my mind, I don't want any."

"Then I suppose it's time to go," I sighed and walked for the doors.

"You're not so happy with this mysterious trip, are you?" she crossed her arms.

"I'm afraid," I opened the doors.

"You shouldn't be. Your sister forgave you, I mean, she probably knows it really wasn't your fault, but-"

"I'm afraid I'll let the Doctor down," I corrected, cutting her off midway.

"Of what?"

"He's gonna expect some big, miraculous recovery of a pain that's lasted for over three years, plus the pain before Olivia's death. He's going to want to see me get over it by the time we return and...and I can't do that, Martha," I shook my head, shutting my eyes as I felt a bit of water rushing up to them, "I can't."

"Hey, hey," she walked over, putting a hand on my shoulder, "He doesn't expect that from you. Neither of us expect that from you. Don't feel pressurized, please. What he expects, what we both expect, is for you to confide in one of us, both of us if you like, so that you can finally breathe a little. I'm no psychologist, barely a Doctor," she paused and we both smiled, "But I know it can't be good for someone to keep such a trauma bottled up, especially if that kid already had problems with her family to begin with."

"I'm no kid," I argued weakly, smiling.

"No, you're not," she smiled back and opened the door for us and we started walking towards the console room, "You're pretty grown up."

"Yeah..."

"I mean, you take care of yourself on your own, that includes education and personal needs without bothering anyone else. You're really mature and grown up," she shrugged, "Never seen anyone like you."

"Thanks."

"And sometimes, you're even more grown up than the Doctor," she whispered, though our laughter was loud.

"Is that a laughter I heard?" the Doctor called, working on the console; more like breaking things as usual, "From Minerva?"

"It's not out of this world," I mock-glared.

"After a week, I think it is," he walked over, stopping to study us both.

"Oh here we go," Martha rolled her eyes, "Fashion criticism time. Alright, give us your worst."

He rolled his eyes at her and shook his head, "You look like red wine."

"I can't tell if that's an insult or not, can you?" she glanced at me.

"Red wine is usually elegant," I offered, shrugging.

"Oh, I'm elegant," she considered it for a while more, "Okay, I'll take it. And what you got for her?" she nodded to me, "Smurf?"

"Oi," I frowned for a second and made her laugh, "You picked this one out. Were you trying to make me look bad?" she playfully rolled her eyes while shaking her head.

"You look...beautiful," the Doctor remarked, looking me over.

"Mmm, I get red wine and she gets 'beautiful', I got you alien," she narrowed her eyes as if warning him, "I got you."

"Martha stop," he ordered lightly, "You really do look beautiful though," he smiled at me and suddenly I had an actual blush warming up my face, "How are you feeling?"

"Um..." I cleared my throat, hoping his oblivion would actually work to my favor at the moment while my blush disappeared, "...just..." I shrugged, no answer for that question, and I wondered when exactly I would be able to answer it.

"Well, I was hoping this place could kind of cheer you up," he sighed, looking at me for another moment, only enforcing the dang blush, "Hopefully I'll manage to do that."

~0~

We stepped out all together, my eyes covered by the Doctor's hands yet Martha freely looking around. It only made me squirm even more when I heard her gasp and 'awe'. As bad as I felt, my curiosity always won over.

"Can I please see, now?" I asked for the third time in the one minute we'd been here.

"Oh, seems like I'm doing well so far," I could almost hear the Doctor's cocky grin with that remark.

"It's only because you're covering my eyes and therefore my curiosity will obviously rise," I clarified, "Now can I please see?"

"You're gonna love it, Minerva," Martha assured, though sounding distracted as she probably was still looking around.

"One...two...three," the Doctor took his hands off my eyes and allowed me to see what was so 'great' that made my friend gasp and awe.

I blinked, looking around as the sun partially covered up my vision. It was very beautiful, I'll admit first. There were bright, green vines covering buildings and trees, and...tree-houses? There were people inside those 'tree houses'! Others were inside the main building where the laughter and clattering of dishes alerted us it was another restaurant building. But there were tables set down on the ground, adults chattering while children scurried around. There were small games set around, different pairs playing them while others opted for horse rides around the establishment. I think I even saw an elegant swing set behind the several trees and besides the building.

"Where are we?" was all I could say at the sight, eyes quickly scanning one thing and another.

"Le Plessis-Robinson," the Doctor answered, "A guinguette, mind you. Opened in 1848 and was a hit for several years."

"Those are tree houses," I pointed up.

Wrong," he moved beside me, hands behind his back, "Those are private places to have a nice meal with friends and family."

"But that's incredible," Martha gawked, "Oh I am so riding a horse," she quickly glanced at me, "After we talk of course, you first."

"Don't let me hold you back, Martha," I said, "Go on if you'd like that."

"No, I mean it. Look, I get why you told the Doctor about your sister, but you had no obligation to tell me. And yet, you did. It makes me think I'm becoming a part of your friendship, and I'm so thankful."

"Well, before we cry for unnecessary reasons," the Doctor began and took each of our hands into his. "Why don't we begin on this trip's purpose?" he glanced at me and moved aside, leaving me in between them. "The whole point is for you to talk."

"But I don't want to cry-"

"And that's the beauty of this place," he gestured ahead of us, "It's one big distraction! Anytime you feel like you're going to cry and you don't want to, just stop talking and we'll do something else, anything you want. Then, when you feel confident to continue, start talking again and we'll listen."

I looked at him oddly, "So this is like a hit-play-and-pause-button thing?"

"Yup!" he grinned excitedly, "And I'm with Martha on the horse riding. I had a horse once, his name was Arthur, remember I told you about him?" I nodded, recalling he had left said horse with Madame de Pompadour, "Maybe we can hit that pause button and go horse riding."

"I've never ridden a horse in my life," I informed then smiled at my friend's excitement with the horses, "But I suppose I could watch you."

"Excellent!"

"But it could take hours for me to finish," I admitted, "I've never really unleashed everything and I since don't want to cry it'll take even more to finish."

"Then it'll take more to finish and that's that," he gripped my hand, "We're here for you and anytime you want to start then start. Don't mind us."

I looked between them, their encouraging faces willing me to begin as soon as possible. They had such faith that I'd start telling and feel better about it, and truthfully, I wanted to feel better...and I wanted to tell them everything. So I would.

~0~

We walked around the guinguette, just taking a look at what was around and what we'd be doing when I 'paused'.

"I was born on October 31st, 1990," I began, "To Sophia Souza Lozano and Nicolas Souza Lane. I'm the youngest of two, my sister being...seven years older than me. We were a small family, well," I shook my head, "If you can really call us a family. Ever since I could remember, I've been below my sister in everything. My parents love me, at least I hope they do, but it was always clear they had a preference for Liv."

"Why do you say that?" Martha asked, eyeing the Doctor as if they were both agreeing to be cautious in case I had a mini-episode.

"My parents are amazing lawyers, they're just brilliant at what they do and they love it. They built this law-firm that they run and they wanted Liv and I to follow in their footsteps. Liv always had a knack for it and so she was on board the moment she knew of my parents plans for us. But me...not so much. And I suppose that's the first error I committed that got me cast off as the inferior daughter. But even before that, I was never given a proper chance to be a good daughter. It's made me think why would they bring in a child into the world if they were gonna hate it."

"Don't say that," the Doctor frowned, "Beneath all the cruelty there has to be some love from your parents."

"Yeah well let me know if you find it," I sighed, "You know, there are tons of photo albums from Liv's childhood, starting with her first ultrasound picture. I don't even have that. There are no pictures of me until I was about one, one and a half maybe. I was never even given a chance," I stopped walking, feeling the wave of tears begin to rise, "I can't..."

"And it's okay, hit pause," the Doctor said softly, "C'mon, let's go play a game or something."

I nodded and let them lead me off to play some game, hoping I would calm soon enough.

~0~

"I'll get it," Martha exclaimed, throwing a ring at the columns of bottles. The ring went over and fell on the ground, "Aw, never mind. I quit."

"Martha, you do it like this," the Doctor took one of her rings and threw it...only for it to hit a bottle and drop to the ground.

Martha scoffed, "Yeah, I think I'll try that...never."

He rolled his eyes and took another ring from her then handed it to me, "Why don't you try, Minerva?"

"I don't know, I feel like I should just watch you two instead," I shrugged.

"Oh you just like seeing us lose," Martha shook her head, "Try one."

I sighed and took the ring, well this was the point of a 'pause', "Okay."

"I'll go get some more," Martha quickly jumped on the opportunity to enhance the distraction and ran off.

I aimed for a certain bottle and suddenly stopped, silently contemplating, "You know, my mother kept her pregnancy a secret from my family," came out instead.

"Excuse me?" the poor Doctor questioned, having to stop and see the pause button had lifted.

"When my Mom was pregnant with me, she didn't tell anyone. My grandmother said one day she just stopped by with a one year old toddler in her arms, Olivia just eight years old. She didn't tell anyone she was pregnant, except my father. Why did she do that?" For once, I had left the Martian speechless. I sighed and set down the ring, walking away from the stand.

"Minerva, hold on," the Doctor called, quickly catching up.

"Was she thinking of abortion?" I turned to him, "What mother does that?"

"We may never know what ran through her head but the point is, she didn't. She kept you and because of her there's a beautiful, intelligent, young woman traveling with me."

"No thanks to her, she only birthed me. The person I am today, personality-wise, is because of my grandparents. I practically raised myself with the help of them."

"Thank god, no offense," he quickly retracted from any bad ways it could've been taken, "I don't want you to be like your mother. You're definitely not."

"Do you think my mom ever regretted not aborting?"

Next thing I knew, his finger was over my lips, "That question will never be asked again, understand?" he raised a serious eyebrow, "If there's one good thing she's done is give birth to you."

"Birth? What birth?" Martha returned to us, new rings on her wrists, "What happened to the game?"

"I hit the play button," I replied.

"Apparently, good old Sophia hid her pregnancy from her family, not revealing Minerva until she was one," the Doctor explained, gritting his teeth.

Martha looked horrified, "Oh my god," she looked at me, "Your mom has serious issues."

"Funny, that's what she told me," I shrugged, "She always said there was something different about me, something she didn't like."

"And what could that be?"

"She didn't ever tell me...but she said I could cause lots of pain. And that she wouldn't allow me to hurt anyone."

"That sounds ridiculous," Martha shook her head.

"No, that sounds like a paranoid human," the Doctor corrected, looking like he was thinking of something.

"As ridiculous or paranoid it may sound, she was right. I did hurt someone, Liv."

"No you didn't," they both said, stepping closer to me.

"Look, Olivia was old enough to make her own decisions," Martha began.

"And she chose to drive in a state she shouldn't have," the Doctor continued, "Lots of people tend to do that and it's no one's fault but theirs."

"She could've walked," Martha reminded.

"Or better yet, she could've stayed and worked things out with you," the Doctor reached for my hand, Martha doing the same.

"But she didn't," she sighed.

"And what happened after that was not your fault."

"And we're sure she knows that."

"But that's not what my Mom thinks, what most of my family thinks," I reminded, "Tell me, how do you get rid of an idea that's been implanted in your head for four years?"

"Because it's not, and deep down you know it," the Doctor answered, "But also, deep down, you think of your blame and accept that it because you think, if you accept that fault then your mother would forgive you. But it doesn't work like that, Minerva. Primarily because it's not your fault."

"That's not the only guilt I carry," I admitted, "Olivia's death was just the beginning of the guilt, then when I left home..." I shook my head, blinking rapidly the tears away, "Let's go play some more," I quickly walked off, hearing them right behind.

The dead couldn't forgive me, but could a sweet, old lady?

~0~

"Oh, look at that," Martha walked ahead of us, gesturing to the one swing set we'd seen earlier, "Isn't it pretty?"

There was one swing, with a wooden seat that I'm sure wasn't comfortable unless you worse a dress with layers like Martha and I wore. Beautiful vines covered the chains and poles, a few pink roses sprouting as well.

Martha plopped down, giving a few small pushes with her feet, "Eh, it's more for show," she crinkled her face as the chains creaked, "Oh! Why don't we do the horse rides? In sure that'll put you in a good mood," she stood up.

"I'm not sure," I said, "The idea scares me."

"We could always eat first," the Doctor suggested.

"How about I just sit on that swing for a while?" I pointed, the beautiful swing just taunting me to come over.

"Okay," she moved aside and I walked over, sitting down and putting my hands around the chains, "I feel like a princess," I admitted sheepishly.

"And I bet the horses would make you feel even more like a princess," Martha edged on for the horse rides, "Cinderella?"

"First of all, not blonde," I reminded, gesturing to my brunette hair over my shoulder, "And no blue eyes."

"Can't we just try to ride?" she looked between the Doctor and I, looking so hopeful we would say yes.

"Go see how it works," I sighed, "And we'll ride them."

"Oh thank you!" she rushed over and hugged me, running off towards the horses.

"Way to stick to the subject!" the Doctor called after her, shaking his head.

"Oh leave her," I smiled after our friends, "She came to time travel not to hear some girl's life story."

"It's a story we want to hear," he assured.

I sighed and gently pushed myself, "My grandparents used to take me to this park and I always had to go on the swings."

"Yeah?" he leaned against the pole.

"But I wanted to be a 'big girl' and push myself," I smiled, recalling the taunts my grandfather used to do to get me to push myself when I got lazy.

"I bet you were a sassy and argumentative five year old," he smirked.

"You'd be shocked to know I wasn't. When you grow up isolated, it's sort of impossible to be sassy on your own."

"How lonely was your childhood?" he asked, now serious.

"I felt like my real parents were my grandparents. I had a big, big house, with all the toys a kid could want and yet I was the loneliest. My grandma taught me how to cook, how to sew, how to read, how to be kind, be respectful, be caring...my grandpa taught me how to ride a bike, skates, how to sing songs with him. He loved to have little duets with me. They taught me basically everything I know. They were my parents. Mine wouldn't even greet me in the mornings. I was lucky to eat dinner with them, their work consumed most of their day and Olivia was too old to play with me. I had two or three friends out there but a kid wants their parents with them, you know. I wanted my mom and dad, but they were never there."

"When you said your parents wanted you to be a lawyer..." he trailed off, cautiously pausing to see how I'd react.

"Clearly, I was never close to my family, and when I told my mom I didn't want to be a lawyer, things got worse. She yelled so much that day I wondered how she didn't lose her voice. This was before I was thirteen, but it didn't matter. I suppose I let her down."

"Hey, if you didn't want to follow in their footsteps then it's okay. No one can tell to what you're working in. No one gets to choose your profession."

"After that day, my isolation increased," I sighed, looking down, the lonely night when I was afraid of the monsters in the closet, "And then Olivia died...that was the last straw for my parents and me. I...emancipated myself."

"What?" he stood away from the pole, shocked.

I swallowed hard, keeping my eyes focused on the ground, I didn't want to cry yet, "The reason my school work didn't have any mention of my parents is because they're not legally responsible for me. I filed for emancipation two months after my 14th birthday."

"Minerva," he whispered, his footsteps following after wards, appearing in front of me, bent down to my seating level, "You what?"

"I couldn't take it anymore, Doctor," I shut my eyes, "I was just done. I wanted to get the hell out of the house."

"But you could've gone to live with your grandparents-"

"My grandfather had died and I wouldn't become my grandmother's burden." A tear started strolling down my face, but I still wanted to continue, "Such a sweet woman didn't deserve it. Oh god, she was so upset when she heard of the emancipation. She begged me to stay with her but I couldn't. And I didn't...and I disappointed her. To this day, I don't think she forgave me either. That's why I work hard on everything I do, so hard so that one day I can go and visit her and make her proud of me. Olivia's dead and I'll never forgive myself for it but my grandmother is still alive and I can still earn hers. I could still have a chance. I want to make her proud of me...but maybe it's too late."

"It's never too late," he smiled softly, taking out a cloth from his pocket and pressing it to my cheek, drying it clean from tears, "I don't think she cares about forgiveness. I think she just wants to see her granddaughter."

"Do you think?" I sniffled, slowly able to look at him.

"From the little I've talked to her, I know that's what she wants. She just wants her granddaughter to come back, to answer her calls. And when you do go back, I know she'll be so proud of you. You've done the impossible. You saved the world, what other granddaughter has done that?"

"That was you."

"I didn't do it alone so don't sell yourself short. You've made her proud countless times now. You've done good, Minerva, and it's about time you realize it."

I exhaled in a shaky manner, dropping from my swing to him for a hug, "Pause!" And I started to cry nonetheless.

~0~

" So you...emancipated yourself?" Martha blinked, her eyes so wide I thought they'd just pop out her head.

We had caught her up as soon as she returned, wanting all of us to be on the same page. We had moved to go eat lunch, up on a tree. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. It was like a tree-house, but very sturdy and large, and not at all wobbling or creaking. The same, beautiful vines were wrapped around the wooden poles and roof. There was a wooden table, where Martha, the Doctor and I sat, a whole course meal set in front of us. Everything was just...amazing, too bad we had visited under these circumstances.

"Martha, she hasn't hit play," the Doctor reminded her, taking a sip of his drink.

"Oops, sorry!" she exclaimed, alarmed she'd pushed me too far.

"Play," I said calmly, feeling like this was becoming oddly easy as the day went by.

"Are you sure?" the Doctor asked.

"Yeah," I nodded, taking a deep breath, "I'm ready."

"So, um, emancipation..." Martha fiddled with her food, trying to act like her curiosity wasn't getting the best of her, "...how did you do it?" Her eyes widened again at the thought.

"With a lot of evidence," I replied, "I was fourteen, legal age to file, and my parents didn't care very much. They thought I was only joking but by the time things were too far it was too late."

"But don't your parents have to, like, authorize?"

"I presented everything that showed what a life I lived and the judge was even surprised. I proved I could handle myself, I was intelligent back then too," I caused both to smile, "And I'd have a steady job for a while. I'd work with my uncle, he's a photographer and traveled around the worlds."

"Is that where you got your adventurous spirit?" the Doctor asked.

"In a sense, yeah," I nodded, "He's my mother's brother, and completely opposites. Along with my grandparents, he believed in me. He understood me. My mom and him had the same argument over what he should be when they were young. He was just like me."

"What do you wanna become?" he asked.

I thought about it and resulted with an unknown answer, and I was embarrassed to admit it so I moved on like it was never even asked, "My uncle, Aaron, was the first to know about my plans for emancipation and...he helped me."

"He helped you?" both friends repeated with surprise, but I understood very well; it wasn't common for a mother's brother to help their niece file for emancipation against his sister and brother-in-law.''

"He's the one that helped me find a lawyer; apparently Greyson owed him a favor, good lawyer," I leaned back on my chair, "Together, we worked for my freedom. And Uncle Aaron even helped me the first couple of months after I was emancipated by bringing me along on his trips as an assistant. We both loved to travel so much, I suppose it's what bonded us."

"And where's your uncle now?" the Doctor questioned, "Do you speak to him?"

"Not really," I shook my head, "I don't have his number anymore. But if I could, I would speak to him."

"So we got a good uncle, grandmother, grandfather," Martha counted on her fingers, "So why don't you call any of them?"

"Because I can't, Martha. Every time I hear my grandmother's voice I think of how much I made her suffer. I can hear her begging in my head not to leave and I can't get rid of it."

"But you want to go back, don't you? You want to see her again if not you wouldn't 'work so hard'," the Doctor said, "You plan on returning."

"Maybe, one day," I shrugged, thinking of the day I would finally gather all my courage and visit my grandmother, "But I have to work more. She has to see how much I've accomplished. I want to make her proud of me and earn her forgiveness."

"You do," Martha nodded, the Doctor agreeing as well, "It's amazing how much you've done and not even realize it, Minerva. That's what I like about you, you don't show off in the least."

"Thanks, but I don't think it's enough. Besides, I can't just go blabbing about traveling in time to her. She's old and she wouldn't be able to handle something like that."

"Oi, give her some credit," the Doctor scolded lightly, "I think to handle losing two granddaughters, one for four years and still remains alive has been a lot."

"Yeah..." I contemplated his words, wondering how much pain I put my grandmother through. God, I hoped she'd forgive me one day, "...I can't...I just can't..." I looked at the table, seeing our fruit was still missing and feeling more tears come through, I quickly stood up, "...you know what, there's still some fruit we haven't got, I'll go get some." And I scurried off, or at least I tried to.

"Oh no you don't!" the Doctor called, his sounds of footsteps coming closer and closer down the stairs.

"Catch her!" Martha called, peering down from above.

"Thanks for the help, Martha!"

"Oi, I've got heels and a dress!"

"Got you," the Doctor spun me around midway through the spiral stairs, "Come on, Minerva. The whole point is to talk, not to run away."

"I'm sorry," I looked away, ashamed of my action, "It's just...too much..."

He nodded, "I know, and I'm very proud you're taking the step to talk us."

"I'm glad I made one person proud..."

"Stop it, just stop it," he ordered seriously, "You've got to stop putting so much blame on yourself! You've been tortured enough all your life and you won't continue to do it while you're with us. No more."

I looked at him and I couldn't help chuckle a little, albeit bitterly, "You thought I was such a 'beautiful complexion' when in reality I'm nothing but an ugly, horrible mess. Look at me," I let my arms fall beside me, frustrated with my life.

"Oh, don't say that," he put a hand on my cheek, rubbing away loose tears with his thumb, "I don't take back my words. I see a complexion, a much more complex complexion," he made a face that was able to get a faint smile from me, and in return he smiled as well. "But beautiful nonetheless..."

"Face it Doctor, I'm not the innocent girl you met. I'm not a good person."

"I could say the same for you, I'm no innocent man either," he shook his head, taking his hand off me.

"But what you did was without choice," I reminded, disliking the pain in his eyes when he spoke of that moment. He was very right, it was the same pain in my eyes, only his was enhanced with the thousands of people that died. And I hated it, I hated how tortured he looked, "I look at you and I just see the Doctor, someone who's always there when people need his help."

"Really?" he raised an eyebrow, seeming in doubt.

"Oh yeah, I see the ridiculous, banana-loving, alien that I time travel with."

He smiled, "Really? That's good, that's very good," he seemed so excited I actually laughed, "And that's even better," he pointed.

"Oi! You two?" Martha's voice made us look up, the woman looking down at us rather impatiently, "Are we going to have lunch or stand on the stairs?"

"Well?" the Doctor looked at me, gesturing the way back up, "That chicken smelled really good you know."

"And pasta, I love pasta," I nodded, taking hold of his hand, "Did you do that on purpose?" I questioned as we started back up, me holding a piece of my dress so I wouldn't trip.

"Maybe. Psychic paper does wonders for us."

"I thank you for your consideration in me, it means a lot."

"There you are," Martha walked over to us as soon as stepped onto the shack, "Are you okay?" she looked at me.

I sighed, looking at the table to avoid the answer of the question, "So how's about that lunch?"

"Definitely," she nodded, understanding I just couldn't answer to that yet, and returned to her seat as did we, "So, I was thinking we could maybe find your uncle," she said slowly, and rather casually, "If that's okay with you."

"I think it'd be a good idea," the Doctor agreed.

"I...I guess I wouldn't mind," I considered it, knowing Uncle Aaron would have so many stories of his own adventures to tell me if we spoke again, "Yeah, I definitely wouldn't mind."

"Excellent!" the Doctor grinned with so much excitement at the answer, "And your grandmother?"

"I don't know..." I shook my head, "...I don't feel ready."

"Well, regarding the promise I made to Jackie, I'm going to tweak it."

"How so?"

"I'm bringing you home," he nodded, chuckling at my deep frown I immediately gave. Had he not heard everything? I didn't want to go home! "I'm bringing you to your real home, with your grandmother. That's where you'd be more happy."

"I'm not ready, Doctor," I said quietly.

"But you will be," he said with so much assurance I almost believed him.

"There's no pressure though," Martha said, "But I'm with the Doctor on this one, you definitely will be ready."

"Maybe..." I shrugged, smiling sadly, knowing that day was just too far away.

~0~

"Olivia was a good sister, we weren't as close as I wanted us to be, but...she was different from my parents," I explained as the Doctor and I took a walk around the guinguette's outskirts, our arms linked with each other.

"Minerva, who is Olivia?" he asked, encouraging me to talk more about her.

"Olivia Sophia Souza was this amazing, perfect woman that ever walked the earth," I smiled at the memory of my sister, "She was beautiful. And I'm talking like super-model beautiful. She was blonde, tall, icy blue eyes," I chuckled a little, "They say she was the splitting image of my mother when she was young. My mom was blonde back in her day, though she dyed it brown for some reason, but other than that, same blue eyes and figure. She truly was my mom's daughter. Me, I was the odd one."

"Now why do you say that?" he frowned, "You're beautiful too, and with jade eyes!"

I smiled, "Both my parents have blue eyes and so did Olivia. I got my green eyes from my grandmother, but that's all I got. I look nothing like them, much less act like them," I paused, sighing, "Olivia had the aspiration to be a lawyer. She wanted to be one, independent from my parents feelings. She had their support from the start. She was perfect, Doctor. She got good grades, did sports, knew how to talk to people and how to help-"

"You know how to do all that too," he pointed, "You're intelligent, you've beat me at several sports-"

"Yeah but you suck at them anyways," I cut him off.

"Oi!" he pouted, "I'm not that bad."

"Let's not go into that," I patted his arm.

He sighed, still sounding annoyed but let it go, "Anyways, Olivia?"

"Oh, are we talking about her now?" Martha walked over, "Mind if I join?"

"Please," the Doctor gestured for her to move beside me, "Minerva's belittling herself and it's quite frustrating."

"I'm not be-"

"Shush it," he pointed again, "Martha?"

"Stop belittling yourself," she sighed.

"I lived in the shadow of my sister," I explained, "And it wasn't her fault, she never gloated about it. She tried to help me, actually. She thought I should give the whole lawyer thing a chance, thinking it'd be good for me and my parent's relationship. She was a good sister. And even when I was little, and my parents didn't take her away from me, she'd play dolls with me. She'd tell me not to be afraid of the monsters under my bed, she'd tell them to go away," I chuckled, "She once yelled at my closet for five minutes because I told her a monster had come out and said he was gonna eat me. Before we grew up, Liv and I did share some kind of bond."

"So then how could you think she'd blame you for her death?" the Doctor asked.

"The day Liv died is not a day I like to remember," I sighed, wishing so hard I could forget it. But after many years of the accident, I found it impossible. "She took me out for lunch, our parents locked up in their office for work. We went by our favorite place, both pasta lovers. She's actually the one that got me into pasta," I chuckled lightly, soon finishing when I spoke of what happened next, "She started up with the whole lawyer thing. She insisted that I should try it because I was still young and indecisive. But I knew it wasn't a tantrum. I didn't want to be a lawyer. To this day, I still don't want to be one. The simple thought of it makes me cringe. I started getting frustrated when she told me that this was the reason my parents and I couldn't get along; that it was because of me and my snappy attitude. But then I lashed out..." the yells of that day started replaying in my head, "...I flat out told her it was because of her that my parents didn't love me. It was because of her that they never spent time with me. It was her fault...and it wasn't. I yelled at her because I was jealous. I was jealous that mom loved her and gave her all the time she needed while I was lucky to get a goodnight kiss. Olivia denied it, but I think she knew I was right, deep down. There was a look in her eyes... I think she knew it, but she didn't want to admit that she was the preferred daughter. It wasn't her fault, I know that now. I was just so tired of being ignored that the argument made me blurt everything and it got her dead. She got angry and told me to get home on my own. She just left after that and it only took me five minutes afterwards to realize how unfair I was to her, how sorry I was. I planned on apologizing as soon as she came home. I was going to, I swear, I..." and my voice broke, fresh tears preparing to stroll down, "...but she never came home."

"We're sorry," the Doctor said.

"I was waiting at home when my mom called. She told me Olivia got in a car accident and a man brought her into the hospital. It was because of that stranger that she even lasted a little longer. My mom was so upset, she was crying and asking what had happened. Why wasn't I with her? And then I told her..."

"And what she say?" Martha asked softly, half guessing it wasn't very nice.

"She said it was my fault. If I knew how to control myself Olivia would still be alive..." I sighed, "...I made her lose her daughter."

"But she still had you, her other daughter, and she should have been there for you too," the Doctor said.

"There was so much blame, so many words said from her...sometimes it makes me think that I'm not even related to her because her hatred is just so much, so bad...how does a mother hate their child?"

"But she can't hate you!" Martha exclaimed, shaking her head in exasperation, "No mother is capable of that!"

"But mine is. There's this look in her eyes, one that makes me think that if she could, she'd have me locked up for the rest of my life."

"But we're never letting that happen," the Doctor declared, "Ever."

"She's called, you know," I gritted my teeth, angry at all those times, "My father kind of just, washed out on the whole fathering thing. He's never called, but my Mom...she called a couple of times when I was with Uncle Aaron. I took them because I thought she'd tell me I was forgiven but it wasn't, it was never like that. She just kept yelling and yelling and ordering me to come home so she could make sure I wouldn't hurt anyone else, that I wouldn't take anyone else's children from them. After that, I stopped...and I grew angrier and angrier; angry that she wouldn't forgive me and angry because it was my fault. She stopped calling for years, up until Christmas time, last year," I glanced at the Doctor, "I don't know how she did that but she contacted Jackie. She had this whole 'nice' act, but it didn't last long. I don't know what that was...but I haven't heard from her since."

"And your grandmother?" he asked, knowing she was a different story.

"She's always called," I sighed, smiling sadly, "My grandma is so sweet like that. But I can't bring myself to take her calls. Ever. I'm not ready yet, I don't have much to prove I've done good. Plus, I'm afraid my mom got to her and she blames me for Liv's death."

"Minerva, she chose to drive off," Martha reminded, "That's not your fault."

"But I can't tell her how sorry I am now, how much I regret telling her all that. I don't hate her, I do love her, and it's not her fault our parents chose her."

"That's what you told her?"

"I yelled at her so much, I think the whole thirteen years of isolation and reprimands of my parents was unleashed."

"Well, she knows that now," the Doctor said, "Olivia knows that her sister is sorry for what was said and she most definitely forgives you and knows, for the dozen time, that it was not your fault for her death."

"C'mon," I shook my head and we walked off, the pause button activated.

~0~

"Martha, why do you care so much about me?" I asked suddenly, stopping our walk we had taken after lunch.

We started talking about small things, nothing important but everything had gone quiet. And then I started to wonder this exact question, and I got curious to know.

I could understand the Doctor since this was the whole point of traveling together; to get to know each other, but Martha? I knew her so little before the hospital, only touching bases on our families, friends and occupations. She'd taken such an interest in me, like a friend would, but too fast. I've had little friends in the past back at home but even those took several months to develop into an actual friendship. Yet with Martha, everything was happening so fast. One moment, the woman doesn't even know I'm a time traveler and the next she knows about my sister's tragic ending and my mother's cruel blame...and she was so calm about it. After the Doctor and I returned from New New York, I sat Martha down, with the encouragement of the Doctor, and repeated my story to her. And it wasn't even the Doctor's encouragement that made me tell her, I wanted to tell her.

"Because I'm your friend," Martha answered like it was an obvious thing, "I mean, at least I hope you consider me as your friend," she chuckled nervously, "Because then that would be awkward."

"I do see you as a friend," I nodded, "I see you almost like a best friend even, though it's a bit fast I know."

"Hey, it's like they say, you can fall in love with someone in one day. Same thing goes for friendships. You could meet someone early in the day and by night, you're practically best friends."

"Yeah, I suppose that makes sense," I thought back to Mickey and considered how fast we became best friends as well, "I'm lucky to meet people like you," I hugged her out of the no where, "I meet Mickey, Jackie, the Doctor, you, and you all make me so much better," I sighed, "Thank you."

"Hey, no problem," she chuckled, pulling away, "I'm glad we're becoming good friends."

"Me too," I admitted, "I've never really had a woman for a friend, a real friend."

"What about Rose?" she raised an eyebrow, a bit confused.

Well...the blonde had been...sort of one...for a short time...right?

"Minerva?"

"Uh, sorry Martha but that's another story for another day," I smiled a bit, "But just know you're something different Martha Jones, much different than Rose Tyler, and I am so glad we took you on-board."

"No complaints from me there," she raised her hands, making us both laugh.

"But seriously, thank you."

"For what?"

"Listening, for listening to every bit of information I've said all day," I shrugged, "I know it's a lot, and boring."

"Boring is the last word on my mind," she did a look that said just how screwed up my life really was.

"Well, just, thank you, you know. I know when the Doctor offered to bring you along for trips, you expected the fun, the excitement of them. You had no obligation to hear me out or anything."

"But I wanted to, I still do in case you wanna keep sharing," she smiled, "Listening to your story made me think about my own family. We're not the, um...picture-perfect family as you may have noticed," she shook her head, me recalling the yells of the blonde, now identified Martha's father's girlfriend, "But we do have a special bond. We're there when we need each other. I have my brother and sister and..." she looked at me, sadness pouring from her eyes.

"I don't have that," I finished what she couldn't, "It's okay to say it, Martha. I'm realistic."

"I just find it incredible what your mother has done to you. I find your whole life incredible. Most importantly, I find it incredible how strong you are even after all of that."

'Strong?" I repeated, waiting for her to reconsider her choice of words, "I'm not so sure 'stro-"

"You are, and you need to see it. The easier path is to break and let it consume you, but you don't. I know you have times where you fell like it will consume you but you don't let it. You keep yourself on check on your own and that's incredible. I think you're the strongest woman I've ever met, and I truly hope you remain like that."

"Oh Martha, you're so sweet," I smiled.

"I mean it. You're strong and I know that you'll get better. You'll see that Liv's death wasn't your fault, and you won't let your mother's words affect you anymore. You'll look back and see how wrong she is, and how innocent you are. One day, your mother will ask you to forgive her. Sophia didn't lose a daughter that day, she lost two. She cast you off your whole life and the one day she really needed you, she completely lost you too."

"Would it be crazy and wrong to say I would forgive her in a heartbeat?" I asked sheepishly, knowing with 100% assurance that I would forgive my mother.

"Not at all," she shook her head, "Because she's your mother; of course you'd forgive her."

"Sadly, I don't think that day will ever come."

"Well, in the meantime she comes to her senses," she linked arms with me, "You're not alone in this. You've got me and the Doctor and we will not allow you to carry this guilt anymore."

"My ridiculous, banana-loving alien and humany doctor best friend."

"Interesting chronological order you have there," she pointed, eyeing me with a smirk for some reason, "And...humany?"

"Oh, sorry, the Doctor says that sometimes, guess it kinda stuck."

"Oh, there's a surprise," she chuckled, "You two are so, 'aah'!"

"'Aah'?" I tilted my head, "What exactly does that mean?"

"Weeeell," she swayed her head, "It's-"

"Martha, it seems you bothered the workers so much for your horses that they've finally agreed to let us ride them earlier than planned," the Doctor walked towards us.

"Another time," she winked at me, leaving me even more perplexed, "Did I hear we're riding horses?" she asked the Martian once he was close enough.

"Yes, they're getting him for us," he nodded.

"Great! Because I want that one!" she let go of me and ran a little of to the side, pointing at a tanned horse, "See it?"

We glanced to her direction and saw the horse she was pointing at, drinking some water at the moment.

"I want that one," she reiterated, very serious.

The Doctor rolled his eyes then taking a lavender flower from his back, "And I happened to pick this out for you, it's a crocus."

"It's very pretty," I took it from him, touching its soft petals and looked up at him, "Thank you."

"It's the flower for happiness," he cleared his throat, his eyes seeming to struggle to stay on my level.

"Oh, that's nice to know," I turned the flower over.

"Because, you know, I want you to be happy. I intend to see you happy..."

Martha cleared her throat as she walked over to us, whispering as she moved behind me, "That's what 'aah' means," she patted my shoulder and walked off, chuckling to herself.

I raised an eyebrow, still misunderstanding but finding a very warm blush on my face.

~0~

"Whaddya say, Minerva? Wanna ride one?" Martha eyed me with a smirk, rounding a horse.

"No, but I know you do," I put my hands together, not wanting any of those animals licking me or whatever they did.

"You're not actually scared are you?"

"I'm afraid of horses, yeah..." I looked after one that trotted past us.

"Oh c'mon! The smartest woman I know, the one who's helped save the world is afraid of...horses?"

"Seriously?" the Doctor walked over, a man besides him.

"Yes," I confessed sheepishly.

"That's something I didn't know," he smirked.

"I assure you ma'am, these horses are quite calm and very tamed," the man said.

"Oh, this is Benson," the Doctor gestured to the older man, "He's going to help us ride these horses."

"You mean you two," I pointed to him and Martha who had moved beside me, "Because I won't be riding them."

"Oh c'mon," Martha tugged on my arm, "My dad taught me and it was the most incredible experience ever! We grew up in the city, c'mon, being on a horse in the open is so different from what we're used to."

"The land is very safe," Benson added, gesturing the forest behind the guinguette.

"We'll do it!" Martha quickly volunteered us, "All three of us, now show me horse Benson!"

The man smiled and nodded, walking off to a nearby horse that was tied up and brought it over, chuckling at how I backed away as they grew closer, "She's calm, ma'am, I assure you with my life."

"What's her name?" Martha moved to the tanned-colored horse, petting its mane.

"Alicia."

"Hello Alicia," Martha cooed, "Aren't you the prettiest horse out here?"

"Her name's Jessica," the Doctor suddenly said, making us all look at him, "What? I speak horse."

"Her name's Jessica?" Martha raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, and she's not the prettiest, she says the most beautiful horse here."

"Quite conceited then," I said, receiving a neigh from the horse.

"Jessica says it's not conceited if it's true."

Martha laughed, Benson just looking at us like we were crazy, "Alright then, I want a calm and excited ride, Jessica," Martha patted the horse again, "Benson?"

"Right away ma'am," he nodded and started readying up the horse.

"I'm not riding them," I whispered to the Doctor, "Not in this world."

"It's not that bad," he shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"They're bad, they're all bad," I looked from one horse to another.

"Now don't be rude. I happen to know that, that horse over there-" he nodded to a grey horse that was drinking water, "-seems to like the pretty girl in the blue dress wearing a purple flower on her head."

"He did not say that!" My hand instinctively raised to the crocus I wore on my hair, I hadn't wanted to lose it so I stuck it in the one place I wouldn't forget it, my head!

"He did," he chuckled, "And he's making his way over right now."

"You realize you sound so ridiculous right now," remarked Martha.

"It's what the horse is saying," he gestured to the horse that was indeed making its way over to us.

"Ma'am?" Benson called, Martha turning, "Alicia's ready."

And the horse neighed.

"Jessica," the Doctor reminded.

"Don't listen to him," Martha waved the Martian off and got on the horse with the help of Benson, "Woah," she took hold of the reigns, "I like it," she grinned.

"Horse is nearing," the Doctor coughed.

I only a had a chance to glance to the left when there was loud neigh sound and a big, gray muzzle greeted my face, "AAH!" I yelped and jumped back, bumping into the Doctor that was in a fit of laughter.

"Minerva, he likes you," Martha smiled, the horse coming closer to me, "Take a ride."

"N-n-no thanks," I shook my head, wanting to step back but the Doctor had stuck himself behind me and forced me to stay still, "I like ground, ground is nice, ground is not dangerous."

"His name is Marcel," Benson walked over, holding back the horse by its reins it already worse, "And I'd have to agree with Mr. Smith, he does seem to like you."

"Problem is I'm afraid," I tried leaning back when the horse forcefully took a step forwards, "Very, very afraid. Plus, I don't even know how to ride a horse. One of the things I've yet to do."

"So get on it," Martha exclaimed, "It'll help you distract yourself. We've done a lot of talking, you deserve some fun."

"And I will have fun, waiting for you here," I pointed to the ground, "On the ground."

"Marcel is tamed, good mannered, and very obedient," Benson said, petting the horse, "And if he's taken a liken to you, then he will most definitely take care of you."

"I...I can't," I shook my head and hands, wanting to be as far away as possible from the horse.

"Minerva, the sun is going to be setting and I want to take a ride, pleeease?" she clapped her hands together, my eyes widening at how careless she was. She could fall!

"Martha please take hold of the reigns!" I exclaimed, so fearful at the moment, "Please!"

"Sure," she shrugged, calmly re-holding the reigns, "So will you come?"

"I...I guess," I sighed. She, once again, let go of the reigns and clapped excitedly. I smiled softly, liking how happy she looked. I suppose she and the Doctor did deserve some time of fun after the stories I'd let out on them, "But I don't know how to ride one," I frowned as Benson started to prepare the horse as well, "Can it go like...really slow?"

Benson chuckled, "It's quite easy to maneuver them."

"Says the man who works with them all day..." I looked at the horse, my heart beating faster as I thought of the many ways I could fall and hurt myself.

"Oh don't be so scared," the Doctor walked me up to the horse, "It likes you very much. Though he says your dress looks like water."

"He's not gonna try and eat me, is he?" I mumbled, getting back a laugh from the three, "I am very serious."

"She's quite the amusing one," Benson remarked, stepping away from the horse.

"Up you go," the Doctor moving the horse closer to us.

"Martha, how mad would you be if I said I changed my mind?" my eyes widened as I took in the actual size of this horse.

"I'd be very discontent," she shrugged.

I sighed, "Marcel...don't eat me." And the hose neighed as if he was really responding to me...and he was.

"He promises he won't," the Doctor translated.

"Or drop me?"

The horse neighed, sounding odd.

"He says you offend him," the Doctor said.

"Sorry," I made a face, resigned to having to climb up this monstrosity.

"Ready?"

"...no."

"Up you go!" he exclaimed, helping me up and swing a leg over the horse, "Now hold on."

"No!" I leaned forwards, gripping the reigns, "I change my mind! I change my mind! I don't want to ride this anymore!"

"Minerva, you're not even moving," Martha moved her horse in front of mine, "And he won't drop you."

"I don't care! I don't want to do this anymore!"

"All that time with your uncle and not once did you ride a horse?" the Doctor raised an eyebrow, acting as if I wasn't crying for help.

"No! He tried to but...I always said no!"

"And look where that's got you now?"

"Help me, Martian! Help me! Get me down right now!" I shouted, shutting my eyes.

Marcel neighed and even moved a little, scaring me even more.

"Yes, yes, but she's not over-dramatic; she's had a tough day," the Doctor spoke to the horse.

"Get me down!"

"The sun is setting!" Martha complained, "Minerva, please?"

"I'm so sorry Martha," I shook my head, "But I can't. You go ahead, though."

"Alright, I've had enough," the Doctor sighed.

"Sir, what are you-"

"Marcel and I have a point to prove," the Martian said before I felt the horse move again and an arm wrap around my waist, "Minerva, I'm going to need you to open your eyes."

I opened only one eye and saw his hand holding the reigns while the other held me, "Please tell me you're not..."

"...gonna ride the horse and prove you're wrong about being dropped?" he grinned, "Why yes, yes I am."

"Finally!" Martha exclaimed, "I'll race you!" she laughed and commanded her horse to, running off before us.

"Don't you dare," I warned but he only laughed and made the horse spring after our friend, "Get me down!" I shouted.

Martha laughed and came to an abrupt stop, her horse even tipping her back just a bit that made my heart beat at light speed thinking she'd fall back like the movies, "Let's not torture the poor girl," she turned around.

"Someone get me down from here," I was completely froze in place, breathing heavily.

"It's not that bad is it?" the Doctor asked, chuckling for some reason.

"Let's see, I could potentially die from an abrupt stop, the horse could eat me, or worse, one of you could fall and die!"

"And you think we'd let that happen?" Martha raised an eyebrow.

"The whole point of this is to talk and have some well-deserved fun," the Doctor reminded, 'And that does not include dying."

"Did your uncle die riding a horse?" Martha moved her horse besides us.

"Well, no..."

"Then why would we? We both know how to ride horses," she laughed as her horse neighed, "And the horses like us! Everything is going to be fine."

And the Doctor made Marcel start moving again, slowly for my sake, while Martha moved at the same pace next to us, "Where were you when your uncle rode the horses?" the Doctor asked, probably seeing I was still slightly frozen from fear.

"Um...Ohio," I made sure to look ahead in case either of them missed a rock or something that'd make us fall, "...there was a horse stable and his friends were the owners."

"What were you doing there?" Martha joined in on the distraction.

"He wanted to cheer me up...it was right after I emancipated myself. We went to Ohio for these competitions for the horse-riders and we happened to have a chance to ride them."

"And you didn't?"

"Does it look like I'm having fun?"

She laughed, "You should be!"

"How'd you even learn?" the Doctor asked out of his curiosity.

"Surprised I know something you do too?" she teased, raising an eyebrow.

He shook his head, "Ha, ha, no, I just want to know."

"It was a family vacation," she shrugged, "Tish was a scary cat and Leo wanted a race...so I gave him one...and won!"

"And you didn't fall?" I glanced at her, hoping the Doctor would keep a look ahead because I certainly didn't want to fall.

"No! We didn't have the race right at the first moment, we practiced and then..." she swayed her head, "...we had a race when our parents weren't looking."

"And you didn't fall?"

"No, we didn't fall!"

"Do you have that little faith in Marcel and I?" the Doctor frowned.

"Well Doctor, let's face it, your piloting skills aren't very um," I cleared my throat, "...good."

"You're a bit rude when you're scared, you know that?"

Martha scoffed, "You call it rude, we call it the truth."

"You know what, maybe I should get down and leave Minerva to ride the horse on her own," and he stopped the horse and started doing just that.

"N-n-n-no! I take it back!" I forced his hand on the reign to remain there, "You're a wonderful pilot and always right and please don't let go!"

"Wooooow," Martha smirked, "The necessity is big isn't it?"

"I can't help my fears," I shut my eyes, "Doctor?"

"I'm not going anywhere," he said like it was obvious, wiggling one his hands out from underneath mine to hold the reigns properly and wrapping his other arm around my waist again, "You're very gullible when you're afraid."

"You're not leaving?"

"No!"

"And now that that's settled," Martha cleared her throat and moved a little ahead of us, "How's about a little race? I heard there's a little lake at the center of the forest.

"Noooo!" I shook my head.

"That's a challenge I like!" the Doctor exclaimed happily.

"NO!" I shouted, looking up at him so he could see my determination to not have this race, "Unless you let me down from here, there will be no race!"

"Winner gets to choose the next place we go to?" he grinned.

"No!"

"Please?"

"No!"

"Winner gets to-"

"No! No, no, no, no," I shook my head, "N-"

"On your marks..." Martha suddenly said, smirking when I looked at her, "...get set..." the Doctor took hold of the reign with his free hand, all set.

"Martha," I gritted my teeth, "Don't you d-"

"GO!"

Next thing I knew, we ran like the wind and I screamed at the top of my lungs, terrified for my dear life and my friends.

"Minerva, quit your yelling and look at how beautiful this place is!" the Doctor ordered, even laughing a little.

I cracked open an eye, seeing Martha getting ahead. I opened both eyes as we closed in on the trees of the forest. I blinked, beginning to smile, the sun shining its orange tinge as it set down. It was actually...pretty beautiful.

"How's it look?" the Doctor asked, stopping the horse from its running to only frolic around.

"...very pretty," I whispered.

"Not afraid anymore?"

"...no."

And Marcel neighed, the Doctor chuckling, "Yes, I told you she would."

"What?" I glanced up at him.

"He said you should've known you would've liked it. He's a very good horse."

"And a big and scary one," I added, the horse neighing in response.

"He resents that."

"But a very talkative horse too," I started to smile.

"Oh yes, he is," the Doctor nodded, Marcel neighing again.

"I take he wasn't happy with that remark?"

"Not one bit."

"Martha's winning," I reminded, the woman getting deeper in the trees.

Marcel neighed.

"Yes, Marcel doesn't do races apparently. Also, he doesn't like hearing you scream."

"Sorry Marcel," I actually petted him, "It must be nice being able to speak to animals," I said, seeing him pull on the reigns, Marcel frolicking a little more strongly, but actually not that scary.

"It comes in handy," the Doctor shrugged.

"It must be nice doing everything you do, huh?"

"What are you getting at?" now he looked down at me with a curious expression.

I ignored his closeness and looked ahead, suddenly wanting to answer what I had ignored earlier, "I don't know what I want to become."

"Hm?"

"You asked me what I wanted to be. If I don't want to be a lawyer, or a photographer, what do I want to be?" I looked around, now entering through the trees, finding an immense beauty and the rest of the surroundings, "The answer is: I don't know."

"What about your drawings? You're really good at them. Have you ever considered maybe painting?"

"Would you take me back to Da Vinci?"

He scoffed, "Right after I visit Elizabeth I."

I smiled, "I love to draw, and maybe I would like painting but...I don't know. I love helping people too... I-I just love learning a little bit of everything, you know. I can't really see myself locked in one career," I sighed, "I wanna try everything. Perhaps that was what my mother disliked, dislikes to this day, the most about me, I'm more liberal. I want to go out and do stuff, and she wants me locked up in an office and that's something I can't see myself doing," I sighed again, a deeper sigh, more contemplative, "You know what I wish? I wish humans could have a bigger lifespan so that I could try everything, anything. But I know there isn't time...I just wish I could live a little longer, so I could see what's out there, what my world has to offer...to a human like me. What do you think?" I glanced up at him, seeing a soft smile on his face.

"I think...I think a human likes you deserves that," he mumbled, his smile growing.

"Think so?"

"I do, I very much do."

I swallowed hard for some reason, looking at him for a moment until I felt a blush and looked ahead, "Thanks..."

We moved along again and in silence. Martha's horse barely made a sound now that we had slowed down even more. But it gave me a chance to look around. I really loved this environment, it was so brightly green with the enhancement of the sun shining over the trees. It made me wonder what other planets looked like...and it made me wonder...

"Doctor, what did your planet look like?"

"You wanna know?" he didn't sound too happy about it for some reason.

"Yeah, you know, looking around here," I gestured to the scenery, "It makes me wonder what yours was like. Can I know?"

"Well, for started, we had two suns," he said, pausing I gasped.

"Seriously, two?"

"Mhm, one would rise in the south, and it would make all the mountains shine like you wouldn't believe it."

"Two suns," I repeated, fascinated by that detail, "I bet the sunsets were really beautiful, weren't they?"

"Yeah, the whole sky was a burnt orange..."

"Like a sunset all day? A twilight all day..." I smiled, "And what else?" I sounded like a child but I was so curious!

"Well, in the mornings, the suns would shine and the trees that were silver would catch its light and the forest looked like it was on fire. It was truly beautiful."

"Very," I whispered, "And?"

He chuckled, "Our citadel was enclosed with a mighty glass dome and our suns shined brilliantly above us. But what really got me was the mountains, oh those mountains."

"What about them?"

"They're deep red, Minerva, and the're capped with snow. It was an endless sight..."

I looked at him, realizing this must not be an easy topic for him, and here I am burdening with my questions, "I'm sorry."

But he just smiled, "I wish I could show you. You'd be enthralled..."

"I already am," I corrected, "It sounds wonderful. Especially the snow caps, I love snow."

"I wished it could've stayed like that, but then war started and I had to..." and he paused, making me look up and see him staring ahead, quickly filling with pain at the memory.

"It's okay, Doctor, you don't have to continue," I said softly, regretting my decision to ask him about his home.

All day his sole purpose was to make me happy and what's the first thing I do? Remind him of a terrible, painful memory. Yeah, good going Minerva.

"I do. You told me how your sister died, even when it's not your fault, and you deserve to know why I killed them all, why I killed my own people."

"You don't," I assured, "You're not ready-"

He stopped Marcel suddenly, Martha's trotting disappearing completely, "I had a friend before the war started, she loved hearing about Gallifrey. I told her one day I'd find a way to bring her there...but I never did," his eyes fell down for a moment, a clear struggle to say his next words apparent on his face, "She died because of us. She and her whole planet died because of what my people did. I was going to save her, I was going to take her somewhere safe, somewhere she could survive...but I was too late. I let her get killed. She was innocent," he shook his head, "Her whole species were just innocent bystanders," and then he started speaking with so much anger, such that it startled me how much he changed in a matter of seconds, "When I found out she died at the hands of the Time Lords, I knew it was time to stop. I'm against violence, and you know it," he looked at me and I quickly nodded, "But I couldn't let it continue. Kaeya died because I delayed making that decision. If I would've done something just a bit earlier, then maybe she'd be alive today."

"You feel guilty," I whispered, completely understanding his pain and loss for a moment.

"How could I not? She used to admire us, she had such admiration for me...and I let her down. When she died, it was like an alarm went off in my head: you have to stop this. Because if I didn't, others like her would go down and I would not allow it."

"So you ended it, you ended it to save the innocent," I bit my lip, not even able to imagine him killing all those people, but never judging what he had to do for the sake of others.

"I killed them and this is my punishment, remembering all of those I killed and knowing that my friend died because I didn't save her."

"Have you mourned her?" I asked curiously, thinking it could perhaps help as it did manage to help me last week, even in a small way, "You know, kinda get closure and say goodbye."

"I wish I could, but I don't even know where she is; her body was never found. And I searched, I searched the whole damn planet and she wasn't there. I don't know where she ended up...where she's spending eternity in. I just hope wherever she is, she was able to forgive me."

I hated, I hated seeing him like this. His guilt mixed in with his grief and an extra layer of anger. It was the same I carried, and I understood him. For once, I could understand the 903 year old Time Lord because for a split moment, we both lost someone we cared about...and we felt responsible for it.

"We're not so different in the end," I sighed, placing my hand over his on the reigns, "But perhaps we can help each other. You've helped me enough, now let me help you. I can listen, be there when you need me to. We can talk."

"Oh Minerva," he sighed, moving us again, "This is help enough. I love this. Being here, with my sassy human, helping her, on a horse, in a beautiful forest, and just...moving along. This is what I need, moments like these."

"Well, there's no complaints from me," I shrugged, getting him to chuckle, "Hey, you're laughing, that's good. Now I know how that feels, making other people laugh."

"You're good at it too," he mumbled, pulling on the reign again and moving Marcel, his other arm around my waist tightening when I yelped at a sudden hop over a rock, "I won't drop you," he mumbled.

I smiled sheepishly, another blush starting up again. Holding me closer meant I was even closer to him. If I concentrated, I could probably feel the rhythm of his two hears behind my back.

"You know, I don't even think we're trying to race," Martha called, appearing between two trees across us, "I could have easily done two rounds and still win. Is there something I'm missing out on?" she smirked, eyeing us.

"You win," the Doctor waved her off.

"I was thinking that on the way back we could teach Minerva how to actually ride a horse," she suggested, "On her own."

"Then maybe I could drop him off," I pointed back to the Doctor, Marcel neighing right after.

"Oh, that's unity," the Doctor frowned, "Thanks Marcel."

"What he say?" Martha asked.

"He's on Minerva's side!" he exclaimed, indignantly, "I can't believe you'd trade me in for a girl."

And the horse neighed again.

"Wouldn't you?" I glanced at him curiously.

He had this serious look that would be sure to tell me how wrong I was but then it sort of, softened? "...I suppose, if it's you, then..." And he looked away afterwards.

I pondered on his words until I found Martha smirking again, interrupting my thoughts.

What the hell is she smirking about? I wondered.

"So Minerva," she called, "How are you feeling?" her smirk faded into a smile.

I a real and genuine smile as I looked between her and the Doctor. "I think I'm fine. Maybe not the miraculous recovery you want, but I think I'll get there one day. But for the moment, I actually feel quite...fine," My smile grew as my gaze remained on the Doctor. He eventually met my eyes and smiled back.

#dw imagine #10th doctor #ocappreciation #ocapp #doctor who #doctor who imagines #10th doctor imagines #10th doctor fics #doctor who fics #tenth doctor fics #martha jones #oc: Minerva Souza #fic: next stop eveywhere

12 notes · View notes

blankdblank · 5 years

Text

Anaticula Pt 42

Pt 1 - Pt 2 - Pt 3 - Pt 4 - Pt 5 - Pt 6 - Pt 7 - Pt 8 - Pt 9 - Pt 10 - Pt 11 - Pt 12 - Pt 13 - Pt 14 - Pt 15 - Pt 16 - Pt 17 - Pt 18 - Pt 19 - Pt 20 - Pt 21 - Pt 21b - Pt 22 - Pt 23 - Pt 24 - Pt 25 - Pt 26 - Pt 27 - Pt 28 - Pt 29 - Pt 30 - Pt 31 - Pt 33 - Pt 34 - Pt 35 - Pt 36 - Pt 37 - Pt 38 - Pt 39 - Pt 40 - Pt 41 -

“Hey Bernadette!”

Not two hours after your return home you sat on your bed cradling your seeing stone in your palms, through which you saw the elated red headed friend of your mother’s give a quick squeal, “Jaqi!”

“It’s not too late is it?”

She shook her head, “No, of course not, it’s noon here. What’s going on? I heard all bout your big win! Congratulations!”

With a weak chuckle you flashed her a grin then wet your lips to ask, “I was wondering about that offer of yours. For acting lessons.”

With a gasping squeal she asked, “You’re certain?!”

You nodded and grinned, “I think it’s about time I try to get over my audience problems. Performing for a camera might be easier than a crowd at first perhaps?”

She giggled and wiggled in her seat, “Oh this is such great timing! Oh I haven’t been able to write to you yet, though I am on my way tonight to England for a role.” She rolled her eyes, “Some pompous bitch of a boss, with,” she paused with a grin supposedly to amp you up, “An amazing assistant,” after another giggle she added, “It’s mainly silent but I am certain they would be tickled to give you the part.”

“You’re filming soon? They won’t mind?”

She shook her head, “No, in fact knowing I worked with Jewels they asked if I knew you, and I told them you were on the fence about performing. They usually leave the silent roles to last so with your name and clear natural talents they would be wasting their time choosing anyone but you. Besides, it is a perfect first role for you, to get your feet wet.”

“Ok, I um, I did write out a resume,” her brows inched up, “Well, I wrote down a whole bunch of skills that might possibly be useful for roles. Reads more like a lifetime achievement award, even put my grades on it, not sure why-,”

She giggled again, “Oh I am certain it is wonderful. When I get there I’ll come over and I can give it a once over. The film is in Wales though, so you might want to tell your Dad. It’s just for a couple weeks, at least for your part, the rest is mostly about some solitary painting scenes for my character for depth or something. It’ll all make sense later when it’s all pieced together.”

With a nod your plans were sealed, she came out and as your father had already agreed you were off to Wales. A hope that some acting lessons could help you in this was met approvingly by your relatives, Snape and Minerva. News that after the ordeal in the Tournament had an explosion of glee run rampant through the Pears back in France reading that you were dabbling into acting in a Wizarding film alongside a former co-star of your mother’s. The family legacy was continuing and after hopefully a short production period they could add your first film to the family vault of projects they had accumulated over the years.

Truly you hadn’t missed much as Neville spent the weeks with his parents on their first vacation they took Nellie to Bath as they had been delving into their old favorite novels and hadn’t been since their honeymoon and wished to share their memories with their children.

Hermione was off with her parents to a convention and concert in Australia for a few weeks until she would return to stay with you for the rest of the summer to keep her busy and up on her reading while they worked.

Fred and George joined Ginny and Ron off with Molly on a mini family reunion to help their sick Great Aunt Tessie to get on her feet after hurting her foot in a fall in a gnome hole.

Leaving just Draco, who gladly kept up with writing to Astoria between days of alternated watches by Remus, Regulus and Sirius, who all caught glimpses of his models and novels he poured through between lessons with the violin and piano tutor Narcissa had employed again for him in the summer in his studio not far from your home.

Harry however was an entirely different dilemma. On the heels of the news that Percy had been promoted as Junior Assistant to Cornelius Fudge and Albus Dumbledore was asked to step down from the Wizengamot the air seemed to chill and the moonlit sky darkened.

…

I don't know about you, it's just too hot today, isn't it? And it's going to get even worse. Temperatures in the mid-30s Celsius...that's the mid-90s Fahrenheit, tomorrow, maybe even hitting 100. So, please, remember to cover up and stay cool... with the hottest hits on your FM dial.

“Come on, guys, time to go home.” A mother was helping her son of the swing set opposite Harry, “Come on, love, off you get.”

“Do we have to?”

“Yes, we do. I'll make you your favorite dinner to compensate.”

Dudley and his gang entered the park, “He squealed like a pig, didn't he?”

“Yeah, brilliant punch, Big D.”

“Did you see his face?”

Harry forced a smile onto his face, “Hey, Big D. Beat up another 10-year-old?”

Dudley, “This one deserved it.”

Harry nodded, “Yeah. Five against one, very brave.”

Dudley fired back, “Well you’re one to talk. Moaning in your sleep every night? At least I’m not afraid of my pillow.”

“Don’t kill Jaqi!” One of the guy’s mocked out making even Dudley dry swallow remembering Petunia’s reaction when he had first had a nightmare about your being attacked.

The other asked “Who’s Jaqi? Your girlfriend?”

Harry, “Shut up.”

The second guy mocked, “He’s going to kill us, Mum.”

The first taunted, “Were is your Mum Potter?”

“She dead?” Dudley’s eyes dropped to the ground unwilling to stop the guys around him. The wind picking up and burst of cold air circling them snapped his eyes up again.

“What’s going on?”

Dudley, “What are you doing?”

Harry shook his head, “I’m not doing anything.”

The guys turned to flee, “We’re getting out of here Dudley.”

Fleeing from what they took as a storm Dudley’s gang took off leaving their leader, who raced the other way, wheezing in the corner of a tunnel on the edge of the park Harry had been sitting alone in on the swings lost in thought about that graveyard.

Guiding Dudley back again after using his Patronus to fend off the Dementors Harry paused in the street at the familiar small woman formerly used as his sitter in his time with the Dursleys when work called. “Mrs. Figg.”

“Don't put away your wand, Harry. They might come back. Dementors in Little Whinging, whatever next? Whole world's gone topsy-turvy.” She turned to escort Harry.

“I don't understand. How do you know...?”

“Dumbledore asked me to keep an eye on you.”

“Dumbledore asked you? You know Dumbledore?”

“After You-Know-Who returned and Jaqi Black was attacked last year...did you expect him to let you go wandering on your own? Good Lord, boy. They told me you were intelligent. Now, get inside and stay there. Expect someone will be in touch soon. Whatever happens, don't leave the house.”

Harry nodded and led him up the walk and into the house where Petunia asked, “Diddykins? Is that you?” Standing up she moved from the dining room into a clear view of the pair making her mouth drop open at Dudley in his clammy appearance, “Duddy. Vernon, come quick.”

Vernon came around the corner open mouthed saying, “We’re going to have to take him to a Hospital. Who did this to you boy?”

Harry answered, “It was a Dementor.”

Petunia looked him over, “A what?”

Harry wet his lips as Dudley was moved into the dining room table, “A Dementor, it’s um, he’ll be fine, just needs something to pep him up a bit. The effects will wear off.”

Vernon, “And what in the meantime? Just leave him like this?!”

Harry wet his lips and fumbled his hands in his pockets until he found a duck keychain you had given him, “I’ll call Jaqi, she’ll know what they gave us at school.”

Vernon, “What does your school have to do with this?!”

Petunia watched him squeeze the charm you had given him to call you, “Is that a curse? A Dementor?”

Harry shook his head only to watch an owl fly in through the window with a Howler in his beak he let loose that stated without being opened, “Dear Mr. Potter.” The door under the stairs opened itself dropping Petunia’s mouth only to see you climb out of it through a charm you had left there in one of your earlier trips.

“The Ministry has received intelligence that at 6:23 this evening you performed the Patronus Charm in the presence of a Muggle. As a clear violation of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery...you are hereby expelled from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Hoping you are well, Mafalda Hopkirk.”

The letter tore itself up and you asked making Vernon jump not realizing you were there, “Patronus?” You looked at Harry, who was choosing to not ask why you were in thick makeup, tall heels and a long sleeved and pocketed green dress over thick tights with your hair set in elegant waves tucked back revealing your scar was being hidden. “What happened?”

“There were two Dementors, out near the park.”

You nodded and looked to Dudley waving your hand to summon a bar of chocolate you carried over to him. Gently you helped him up, “Come on Dudley.” On his feet he whimpered and you led him to the couch then turned to charm the channel to one of his favorite shows stirring a hint of a grin onto his face as you crouched in front of him unwrapping part of the chocolate bar, “Now, you just snack on this and enjoy your show. Much better soon enough.”

He nodded and accepted the chocolate as you stood and moved to Petunia and Vernon in the dining room still wide eyed, Vernon, “Chocolate? That’s all?”

“A Dementor is a creature that feeds on your happy thoughts leaving you with your most frightening and dreaded moments of your life. They’re under the control of the Ministry, how one let alone two got here is puzzling, though I promise you the effects are temporary and should wear off in a half hour or so after the attack. He seems better already. Don’t panic, all they’ll say is he had a panic attack or something when he bounced back in the Hospital.”

Harry looked you over as Petunia asked, “Were, you at a party?”

You shook your head, “No, one of Mum’s friends got me a bit in her film, which, I should get back, they think I’m getting some air.” Looking to Harry you said, “Wait here, just another hour or so on set and I’ll be back we can talk it all out.”

He nodded then you paused at his body shifting at your step back to the door, “A film? I thought you hated performing.”

You rolled your eyes, “Give me an hour, I’ll explain.” Looking to Petunia you said, “Just let him relax. Back in a bit.”

You did come back, and in the weeks of silence from Ron and Hermione along with everyone else Harry sat up in his room waiting out until he would be taken back to the Grimmauld Place entrance. His hope being that it was true when you had said he couldn’t be expelled without a hearing first and that Dumbledore would handle that.

Freshly scrubbed without a trace of makeup and scars fully visible in boots, jeans and a sweater you sat with the family calming them all down until you said you had to go. No explanation as to where or why he couldn’t go off to your home right then, just stating you had somewhere you needed to be, leaving him in some odd silent limbo with Hedwig nowhere in sight.

***

Shakily you inhaled and outside a dilapidated manor you approached the gate alongside Lucius and Regulus. Your film role having ended the day prior, a last minute flight had brought you here. Mustering up your courage you eyed the familiar Death Eaters along the way, Igor, Barty, Snape included.

Straight through the halls with their dilapidated illusion dropping into pristine condition until a wing backed chair in front of a fireplace was in front of you. A crossed leg with a raised bare foot left your view and Riddle was standing in front of you with hand extended welcoming you into the chair across from him. All about the Tournament was shared and intently he stared at you until you got up to the graveyard again.

“I am curious, why join me? With all you have achieved in facing off against Fudge? Proving yourself to be of such impeccable moral fiber.”

A smirk eased onto your lips and you said, “Fudge has it coming, the coward, besides, what better cover than the hardworking youngest member of the prestigious Black family. Think of how useful that cover could be.”

“I have.” Looking over your shoulder he locked eyes with Barty, “It appears you were right Barty.” With a sigh he rose and motioned for you to do the same guiding you through the halls, in which you caught sight of a familiar long pursued criminal, Fenrir Greyback, the man himself who had first infected Remus. Now watching your every move intently with his group of werewolves behind him, “Every one of my followers must be put to the test, no matter their, relation, to me.” Emphasizing the word relation with a glance your way to see your reaction at his using it again.

At the end of the hall you eyed the dining hall with a restraint table in the center with split off sections for your arms coated with bindings of thick enchanted leather straps and uncharmable metal buckles. The very look of the hall making your stomach clench. Leaning in until he felt his lips starting to heat up barely inches from your ear he whispered in Parseltongue, “Let us see if your loyalty to kin is greater than that blood traitorous mother of yours.” Stepping into the room you eyed the table as he said, “Narcissa, prepare her.”

Heels clicked behind you with the door sealing after, hurrying to your side she raised a backless shirt from her bag she helped you into once you removed your sweater and bra. Softly in raising a ice scented leaf to your lips saying, “Chew and swallow this.” In your eyes looking over hers she said, “It severs emotions temporarily and dries out your tear ducts. You’ll need it. Deep breath and climb up.”

With a nod you followed the instructions and laid out on your stomach while she strapped your arms out at your side, your legs together were strapped down as you felt the clear sever of your emotions ceasing your looming panic attack at the filling of the room. No emotions, no tears. A sharp burn landed on your left forearm and the rule was named for you, ‘you cry you die’.

Upon placing the mark on your skin it would bleed and burn for two straight weeks and if a single tear was shed the mark would start to gush blood until you bled out. In failed tries not to scream out the pain was too much to hold off in the first few days. Though each time seemed more and more agitating for Riddle to bear often having him lapping the room to avoid watching it all.

In and out of consciousness your back was at their mercy with your relatives giving the most convincing attacks on you to ward any others off trying to top them. Every marked Death Eater was welcome to a turn, though a small group only chose to do so under Riddle’s watch. Hours he would monologue missing the leaves your relatives would slip you before you would be left alone in the silent empty room.

***

A week came and went and a knock sounded on the front door on Privet Drive that pulled Harry from helping Petunia with folding the laundry to answer. Opening the door he saw the front entrance to the Black Family Home parting his lips with Remus there, “Hello Harry.”

“Hi. Um, Why didn’t Jaqi come?”

Remus grinned, “She’s not back yet.”

Harry nodded in his confusion, then turned to hurry upstairs, “I’ll get my trunk.”

In his absence Remus introduced himself to Petunia and chatted with her until Harry came back joining him through the door that closed and broke its link with the home Petunia checked by glancing through the mail slot. Inside the main hall Harry asked, “Where is everyone?”

Remus, “Oh, little bit of everywhere. You’ve missed a great deal Harry.”

Harry, “Like what?”

Remus, “Well, we’ve had a great deal of Aurors visiting lately.”

Harry, “Aurors?”

Remus, “From the old order.” Guiding him into the sitting room his bags were floated up to his room while Remus spread out the papers with headlines slandering a great deal of people, Harry, you and Dumbledore included. “Fudge has been busy trying to discredit all he can.”

Harry, “Why is he doing this?”

Remus, “He’s afraid Dumbledore is after his job.”

Harry, “No one in their right mind would believe that.”

Remus, “Fudge isn’t in his right mind. It’s been twisted and warped by fear. Now, fear makes people do terrible things, Harry. The last time Riddle was in power he nearly destroyed all we held dear. And the Ministry will do all in their power to hide from that terrifying truth. Riddle is back and no doubt amassing followers again, meaning we need to recruit as well.”

Harry, “Well if you’re building an army I want to fight!”

Remus sighed, “Let us hope we can avoid your taking part at all. First things first, Dumbledore has been reinstating the old Order.”

Harry, “Order of the Phoenix? That my parents were in?”

Remus chuckled, “We were all in it, but yes. See, Harry, there’s something, we believe, before he would try to come after you, that he would be searching for.”

Harry, “Like a weapon?”

Remus’ head tilted sideways, “In a way. Over all it’s useless, but Riddle put weight in it, so we will have to continue protecting it.”

Harry, “What is it?”

Remus, “A prophecy.”

Harry’s lips parted, “You mean like the one he heard to make him come after my parents?”

Remus, “The very same. He may believe he missed something in it, a way to protect himself again. But, prophecies are tedious and often grey matter. For now, you just relax, Draco should be home soon from the piano to keep you company and the others along in a day or two.”

Harry, “What about my expulsion?”

Remus chuckled, “Your trial will be in front of the entire Wizengamot in a few days. Arthur is going to take you most likely.”

A familiar picture on the table lured Harry to reach out for it, all the Marauders, Lily, Jewels and even you on Sirius’ chest asleep and even Alastor and Snape as well near Remus, “Original Order of the Phoenix. Marlene McKinnon. She was killed two weeks after this was taken. Voldemort wiped out her entire family. Frank and Alice Longbottom. Neville's parents. They suffered a fate worse than death, you ask me. It's been 14 years. And still a day doesn't go by I don't miss your parents. Then Jewels…”

Harry, “Do you really think there's going to be a war?”

Remus, “It feels like it did before. You keep it. Anyway, I suppose you're the young ones now.”

Arthur, “Trains. Underground. Ingenious, these Muggles.” Past the gates he got held up in for a moment due to uncertainty on how to pay the fare Arthur led the way through the tunnels and then out to the streets again for a winding path straight to a phone booth he stepped up to. “Here we are.” Harry glanced around then squeezed in with him, “I've never used the visitors' entrance before. Should be fun.”

Through the bustling crowds Harry caught on to a jumble of conversations, “Terrible. Lost a lot of Galleons trading on the potions market.”

“Daily Prophet, ladies and gentlemen. Anybody for Daily Prophet?” A teen selling papers cried out.

Instantly Harry’s eyes dropped to the title reading ‘Dumbledore: Is he daft, or is he dangerous?’

Through a black shining tile lined hallway full of green flashing floo entrances Harry held his pace at Arthur’s side only to peer up at the towers of glass wrapped offices looking over the indoor fountains with golden statues inside under a tall clock. Straight for a lift they walked and Harry raised his eyes to the floating paper airplane memos floating above their heads. Arthur eyed the man entering beside them, “Morning, Arthur.”

Nodding his head he replied, “Morning, Bob.” In a sideways lurch followed by a shot up Arthur caught Harry’s glance at the memos, “Interdepartmental memos. We used to use owls. Mess was unbelievable.” At the next stop of the lift Kingsley entered and passed Arthur a note, “Merlin's beard. Thank you, Kingsley. They've changed the time of your hearing.”

Harry, “When is it?”

Arthur, “In five minutes.”

The voice in the lift announced your next stop, “Department of Mysteries.”

Lucius next to Fudge spoke in a hushed tone, continuously glancing at his watch to ensure he got back to you quickly, “And I'm confident, Minister, that you will do the right thing.”

Fudge, “Yes, but we must be...” The pair stopped talking when they saw the pair passing them by heading for the waiting room Harry was expected in until he was called out.

Arthur, “Remember, during the hearing, speak only when you're spoken to. Keep calm. You've done nothing wrong. As the Muggles say, truth will out. Yes?” Harry nodded confirming the phrase, “I'm not allowed in, I'm afraid. Good luck, Harry.” The doors opened and Harry stood at his name being called leaving Arthur seated on the bench alone in the room.

Fudge, “Disciplinary hearing of the 12th of July, into offenses committed by Harry James Potter resident at Number 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey. Interrogators: Cornelius Oswald Fudge, Minister of Magic...Witness for the defense.”

His eyes rose to Dumbledore, who stood from his seat stating his name, “Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.”

Fudge, “You got our message that the time and place of the hearing had been changed, did you?”

Dumbledore broke his joined hands apart in an aloof wave off to his sides, “I must have missed it. But by a happy mistake, I arrived at the Ministry three hours early. The charges?”

Fudge, “The charges against the accused are as follows: "That he did knowingly and in full awareness of the illegality of his actions produce a Patronus Charm in the presence of a Muggle."

Auror, “Do you deny producing said Patronus?”

Harry, “No, but...”

Auror, “And you were aware that you were forbidden to use magic outside school while under the age of 17?”

Harry, “Yes, I was, but...”

Fudge, “Witches and Wizards of the Wizengamot...”

Harry, “I was only doing it because of the Dementors.”

Fudge let out a disbelieving chuckle matched by a few around him, “Dementors? In Little Whinging?”

Umbridge, “Highly convenient.”

Harry, “I'm not lying. There were two of them, if I hadn't...”

Fudge, “Enough. I'm sorry to interrupt what I'm sure would be a very well-rehearsed story but since you can produce no witnesses of the event...”

Dumbledore, “Pardon me, minister, but as it happens, we can.”

Fudge’s face dropped and Mrs Figg was shown onto the witness chair Harry emptied to move into the stands behind him. “Please describe the attack. What did they look like?”

Mrs Figg, “Well, one of them was very large and the other rather skinny.”

Fudge, “Not the boys. The Dementors.”

Mrs Figg, “Oh, right, right. Well, big. Cloaked. Then everything went cold...as though all the happiness had gone from the world.”

Fudge, “Now, look here. Dementors don't just wander into a Muggle suburb and happen across a wizard. The odds are astronomical.”

Dumbledore, “I don't think anyone would believe the Dementors were there by coincidence, minister.”

Umbridge cleared her throat then let out a faint giggle, “I'm sure I must have misunderstood you, Professor. Dementors are, after all, under the control of the Ministry of Magic. And it's so silly of me, but it sounded for a moment as though...you were suggesting that the Ministry had ordered the attack on this boy.”

Dumbledore, “That would be disturbing indeed, Madam Undersecretary which is why I'm sure the Ministry will be mounting a full-scale inquiry into why the two Dementors were so very far from Azkaban and why they mounted an attack without authorization. Of course, there is someone who might be behind the attack. Cornelius, I implore you to see reason. The evidence that the Dark Lord has returned is incontrovertible.”

Fudge spat back making Harry’s eyes narrow at the clear fear in his expression, “He is not back.”

Dumbledore, “In the matter of Harry Potter the law clearly states that magic may be used before Muggles in life-threatening situations.”

Fudge, “Laws can be changed if necessary, Dumbledore.”

Dumbledore, “Clearly. Has it become practice to hold a full criminal trial to deal with a simple matter of underage magic?”

Fudge’s eyes narrowed, “Those in favor of conviction?” His, and a few others raised their hands, Lucius not included, who glared across at Umbridge who sent a sneer his way. “Those in favor of clearing the accused of all charges?” The remainder of those who had not voted already raised their hands and Fudge sighed, “Cleared of all charges.” A slam of the gavel and it was all through with Dumbledore storming out as Fudge did the same.

On his feet Harry turned around softly asking to himself, “Professor?”

At the door opening again Arthur entered with a grin saying, “Harry, let’s get you back home, hmm?” Harry nodded and hurried over to him eager to leave this place hoping that his friends would be back soon.

Pt 43

#Dementors on Privet Drive #Trial at the Ministry

7 notes · View notes

amorremanet · 7 years

Note

11, 14 & 17? ^.^

asks for fanfic writers.

I did 17 over here, but!

11. do you listen to music when writing?

Sometimes, yes! It sort of depends on what I’m writing and what kind of mood I’m in, but I pretty much always listen to something. It’s more just a matter of whether I’m going to listen to music or TV/movies.

And then in each case, there’s the issue of like, “do I want to listen to the Twilight Princess OST or the Silent Hill 2 OST?” (because video game OSTs are great at both evoking mood and increasing focus), or, “do I want a video game OST, or my playlist for [character, ship, project, the mood I’m in, whatever; I have playlists for everything]”

—or if I’m going to listen to TV/movies, then it’s like, “TV or movies?” and then, “Disney movie or superhero movie? Marvel movie or DC movie? Pink Flamingos, Hairspray, or Female Trouble? The Prince of Egypt or Crimson Peak? Star Wars” or in TV Land, it’s more, “Well, I can’t work and listen to something relatively new [which is one of the biggest reasons why I’m perpetually late to everything new on TV], so… House or Criminal Minds? Yuri on Ice dub [because I can’t watch the subs and write at the same time] or SVU reruns? Firefly or Futurama?”

14. easiest character to write

Oh gosh, that’s…… hard. And it often depends on the fandom, and sometimes it depends on what kind of mood I’m in, but…

Barty Crouch Jr. has always been really easy for me (partly because he has Favorite advantage, and partly because I’ve put 16+ years into his character at this point, so like. JKR could drop all of her notes about his family and backstory and everything on us tomorrow — not that I really think said notes exist, but if they did — and I’d probably just go, “Yeah, that’s nice, but with all due respect, Mum? My version’s better, and I’m just going to continue treating it as if it’s canon because bite me, that’s why”).

AlSev Potter and Scorpius Malfoy are both really easy, too, but tbh, I think that’s because my versions of them are essentially glorified OC’s, since my attitude toward Cursed Child with regard to characterization is, “*nods mildly* That’s nice, but I’m going to pick and choose at my leisure, thanks. No offense, but I’ve been working on these kids since DH first came out, and I much prefer my headcanon Scorpius who is the biggest, loudest, gayest Drama Princess you have ever met in your life and has been trying to shock Lucius into having a heart attack and dying since he was like six,

“and my headcanon AlSev who’s sometimes Ruby Minerva Severus, most often genderfluid but sometimes a binary trans girl and other time a gay cis boy, loves Ginny but has a complicated and often strained relationship with her (but in fairness, AlSev-Ruby talks to Godfather Neville and Hagrid about their problems more than they talk to either Harry or Ginny), has a complicated relationship with Harry too but for other reasons and when Harry and Ginny eventually divorce each other, AlSev-Ruby is going to stay at their Dad’s more often than their Mum’s, and never lets anyone forget that their middle name is Severus because AlSev-Ruby likes pissing them off with that fact — especially their Weasley grandparents

“Ron but AlSev-Ruby usually feels bad about this because they know on some level that they’re usually lashing out at Ron unfairly because it’s not about their name in most of these scenarios and entirely about other emotions that AlSev-Ruby has no earthly idea how to handle or express in a healthy or constructive way, and they boil over very easily when people needle them about their name (and if it weren’t Ron on the receiving end of this, it would probably be James)

“and Snape’s portrait, whom AlSev-Ruby accidentally made respect them by going, ‘You’re a painting. You are oil on canvas, magically imbued with the real Severus Snape’s personality and memories. Snap at me all you want, but you can’t do anything to me that’s worse than what Rita Skeeter and Molly have been doing for my entire life so far. If you want to get to know me, instead of using me as some conduit for all of your lingering issues with my Dad, then cool, I’d like to get to know you, too. You’re the closest I can get to getting to know my real middle-namesake instead of the myth of him that’s been built up since the War. But if you’ve got nothing interesting to say, then please shut up and let me wait for the Headmistress in peace’ in their first year, if not as eloquently because they were eleven and being Sulky™”

As much as I still hate being compared to her, even accepting that I totally deserve it, Hermione Granger is another easy one for me to get into and always has been. The hard thing with her is not reducing her to either Perfectly Perfect Hermione (which JKR can even fall into some times, like when Hermione hexed the DA sign-up sheet and it scarred Marietta’s face without regard for how Umbridge is the one to blame in that situation and not Marietta) or some joke about some of the times in canon when she was Over The Top about something, in ways that Harry didn’t entirely get so the narrative treats them as Totally Hilarious, even though SPEW (for example) is actually not funny when held up to scrutiny and Hermione works so hard at school out of deep-set fear of failure and being dispensable, and probably also fear that maybe she doesn’t belong in the magical world

Luna Lovegood is also pretty easy for me, though the hard thing with her is trying to make sure that I write her thought processes honestly but in a way that makes sense for the reader (it’s a variation on the big problem of stream of consciousness writing, where writing actual facts stream of consciousness looks like Finnegan’s Wake and is tedious as fuck to read, so Luna has to be close to stream of consciousness but tamed enough so that the experience of reading anything written from her POV is more likely to be enjoyable, and less likely to be like getting hit upside the head with a tire iron labeled, “IT’S ART OKAY, IT’S NOT FOR YOU”).

Then, Remus Lupin is by far the easiest of the Marauders for me to write, and Andromeda Black Tonks can actually be pretty hard for me sometimes, but she’s easier than either of her sisters and still one of the easiest MWPP-era characters for me, period.

And as far as non-HP characters go: well, my other biggest source of fandom writing in the past while has been Teen Wolf, and the top five easiest kids for me there are Scott McCall (to the surprise of no one ever), Kira Yukimura (#still bitter),

“Camden Lahey (but lbr, he’s pretty much just an OC with a canon name because literally all we know about him in canon is, “Isaac’s older brother, on the 2005/6 swim team, died in the military” so the rest of it is shit that I wholesale made up and of course he’s easier for me to get into character with than, say, Allison — who is probably the third easiest of the ladies for me to get into character with, after either Braeden or Malia but it depends on the day — because Allison has, like, actual canon shit to deal with and Cam…… kinda doesn’t.

Like, all of the vaguely Actual Canon shit that he has to deal with is stuff that’s off in the realm of extrapolation, interpretation, and, “Hey, nothing in canon says that he DIDN’T visit Derek and Laura in New York on his way back from his first visit home during his service, or that he DIDN’T drag Derek uptown to see Patti Lupone as Mama Rose because Cam is a Fanboy for reasons relating to his and Isaac’s late Mother, or that they didn’t argue at the intermission about how IT’S A MUSICAL DEREK STOP TRYING TO QUESTION WHY THE CHARACTERS SING JFC IT’S LIKE I DON’T EVEN KNOW YOU”

or, “lbr, Derek is as subtle as a brick hitting you in the face at 5,000 mph and Paige canonically figured out that he was a werewolf anyway, so I don’t think it’s entirely implausible that, if we accept the idea of him and Cam being friends — and Cam being one of the only people who, like, genuinely likes Derek, instead of tolerating him because he’s okay at basketball and his family is rich — then Cam probably figured out that Derek and Laura are werewolves, and if that’s the case, he probably got trotted over to the Hales’ place so Talia could give him third-degree about whether or not he’s with the Argents or any other hunters.

“And, because he was like fifteen and had literally just found out that supernatural shit is real, Cam probably showed that he wasn’t a hunter by getting way too excited about hearing which magical creatures are real and temporarily shelving his hate-on for Talia to be all, ‘oh my god, are vampires real? can they infect werewolves? could Derek be like, a vampire werewolf, how would that even work’ or, ‘so silver bullets don’t hurt you, but what about someone saying your True Name? is True Name magic real?’ or, ‘do seances actually work? I’m totally not asking because I want to try and perform one to contact my dead Mom, I just want to know, like. For curiosity’s sake. Yeah……’”

[spoilers: Cam was TOTALLY asking because he wanted to try and use a seance to contact Eleanor. Derek and Laura had to stop him from trying to do the thing no fewer than eight times before Cam and Derek graduated. To his credit, Derek at least skipped trying to give Cam any kind of lecture, but tbf, he did that because he knew Cam would argue back at him about how Derek had no right to tell Cam that he was doing something stupid and dangerous and playing with things that he didn’t understand, and that Cam’s argument would probably be more than fair.

This did not stop Laura from giving Cam the lectures that he completely deserved, though, because: 1. he was essentially walking up to a big red button labeled, “do not push” and trying to push it without even reading the owner’s manual or the informational plaque on the wall that had a full explanation of why you shouldn’t push the button, and he KNEW that he was doing this, but he felt like it was all going to work out TOTALLY FINE because he wanted his Mom to be not dead and in lieu of that, why can’t he have a seance, Laura, UGH;

and 2. because, unlike Cam and Derek, Larua generally doesn’t do shit that’s too horribly stupid or that has completely awful consequences (…mostly), so she had an actual high-ground from which to give Cam these, “don’t screw around the magic, what the fuck are you thinking” lectures and wasn’t intimidated by Derek’s loudmouth little friend who, like, actively repels everything that even vaguely resembles chill.]

—so, anyway, the point is that I can pretty much do whatever I want with Cam and it makes him a lot easier to write. Laura is a similar case of, “this character is easy for me to write because I made her up,” and in fairness, a lot of my characterization for Braeden is headcanon, too. It’s just headcanon that has more of a basis in canon than Camden and Laura do.

I mean.

Except for parts like Braeden’s twin sister Belladonna who is a ballerina because fuck Jeff Davis, that’s why and also the only family member Braeden still talks to on any regular basis, and their parents who teach at Miskatonic University because I’m pretty sure it’s in the public domain at this point so nyeh, I’m gonna use it, and also they’re in the know about the supernatural but part of a group who has a policy of strict non-intervention, which Braeden thought was bullshit so she set out to do her own thing, which initially involved more plans to help people…… but then she learned that a girl’s gotta eat, and the mercenary work got started.

Also, she will wipe the floor with you at karaoke. Because I felt like it, that’s why.

Yeah, that’s all pretty, “this is not even remotely implied by canon and I wholesale made it up because canon wasn’t giving me like any damn Braeden backstory beyond the barest implications and I fucking felt like it, so there. PS: fuck Jeff Davis.”)

Derek Hale (I’m not always proud of this fact or entirely thrilled about it because when I get into Derek’s head, I take a lot of things from his canon characterization — especially in earlier episodes, before he started trying to be less of a jerk and discovered that: 1. he sucks as an Alpha, and 2. he loves Scott sooooo much — to their logical conclusions and his head is usually not a very pleasant place to be.

Like, he’s my werewolf disaster and I begrudgingly love him but we’re still talking about a guy who, when I write him, makes leaps of logic like, “Well, Cam said to look out for Isaac because he’s not here to do it himself. That is totally the same thing as giving me verbal permission to stalk his baby brother and manipulate him into accepting the Bite, very good plan, way to go, Derek!! :D” and thinks that, “Scott kissed ME first and didn’t explicitly SAY that he’s NOT 17, therefore I’m totally not obligated to ask him shit about shit or consider whether or not he’s having sex with me as a form of emotional self-harm” is a completely valid conclusion and way of doing things

He’s also a guy who would do things like cheat on Braeden with Cam and Cam with Braeden, while telling neither of them about this, and then when he gets arrested for doing something ridiculous, he would call both of them to come get him at the Sheriff’s station because he’s pretty sure that one of them will be mad and decide to just leave him there to think about what he’s done this time — which would end up in both of them coming, and figuring out that they’ve both been getting cheated on, and skip right past the, “being mad at the other cheated upon party” part to the part that’s more like,

“going for coffee and complaining about the fuck-up they’ve both been dating and making fun of things like his secret One Direction blog, or the Star Wars fanfic he writes where his blatant self-insert OC gets to bang Han, Leia, Mara Jade, Lando, both of the Solo twins, and Padmé (in some wonky shenanigans involving time travel) — oh and sucks for Derek, but Cam and Braeden decided to tell Parrish to just leave him in his holding cell because fuck him, they’ve been getting cheated on so he can just call Laura and beg her to come save his ass tonight”

negl, one of my favorite places to put Derek in non-supernatural AUs is prison. How he wound up there usually involved him killing Peter, and it sometimes involved him panicking and hiding Peter’s body under the floorboards because he’s a loser who thinks Edgar Allan Poe is actually a good model for How To Handle Murdering Someone, and…… yeah, I just. I love Derek, he’s easy for me to write, but he’s a disaster in ways I don’t always feel like dealing with, so sometimes, he gets to just go the fuck to prison so I don’t have to deal with him today.)

and……… ugh, I can’t pick between Danny Mahealani and Jackson Whittemore for the number five spot, but both of them are really easy for me, and like. Jackson, I am still vaguely ashamed of, but I don’t feel that bad about it because I got here by virtue of writing him when Astrid and I RP’d TW stuff together and she didn’t want to just talk to herself for ages by writing Isaac and Jackson, and I refused to half-ass it with Jackson and found a way into his head and here we are.

And Danny as I write him is, in a lot of ways, only somewhat less of an OC than Cam and Laura, so…… basically, that.

And bonuses, because I like talking about my legitimate OC’s, oops: Margot, Pete, and Sebastian are the easiest for me to write at the moment but in fairness, that’s largely because I’ve done the most work developing them as characters, relative to everyone else in the cast.

Like, Todd (who is officially Seb’s “it’s complicated,” and Seb’s Gawain Stacy, if you ask Pete — or sometimes even if you don’t ask Pete, because he will totally tell you this whether you like hearing it or not, especially if your name is Sebastian) — Todd has this notion that he, Margot, and Seb are basically gay boy!Hermione (Todd), lesbian!Harry (Margot), and, “Ron but like what if his family had Malfoy money and he was gay” (Seb). He’s not entirely wrong (and their Houses map onto the Trio’s secondary Houses because of course I know my OCs’ Hogwarts Houses, like why would I not know that)

(This whole Thing of Todd’s actually STARTED because I knew that he is a Ravenclaw, Seb’s a Hufflepuff, and Margot’s a Slytherin, and went, “lol, it’s like the Golden Trio in an AU where none of them wound up in Gryffindor, heh”)

and it makes sense that this is how Todd sees things with them because the three of them found each other in undergrad (though Seb found Margot when their RA paired them up for some “getting to know you” thing during orientation because they were the tallest and the shortest people on the hall, and he found Todd at the first meeting of the campus LGBTIQ students organization, had a crush at first sight on the cute chubby guy in the hot pink t-shirt with the screenprint of the Pink Flamingos poster, and totally meant to go be Super Cool about asking Todd out……

……buuuuuut he got excited and instead it came out like, “Hi, oh my god, I love your shirt, you like John Waters, I love John Waters, he’s my hometown hero, oh my god hi hi hi, my name’s Sebastian what is yours do you want to go get coffee, please be my friend, do you like Rocky Horror too? there’s a theatre a couple blocks from here that does a regular shadow-cast, we should totally check it out, I have just met you and I like you please be my friend” instead of like an actual date invite. And he totally called his Mom later that night to go, “MOM, I MADE ANOTHER FRIEND. TWO IN TWO DAYS, MOM. yeah no i still kind of hate my roommate he’s a jerk BUT I HAVE TWO NEW FRIENDS MOM”

………He was very lonely before undergrad because his only constant friend who wasn’t one of his siblings and didn’t shun him after he got outed at Catholic school [though technically, he sort of outed himself in an attempt to spare his boyfriend/best friend from being outed because Seb’s parents already knew he was gay and were totally cool about it, but Damian’s parents believed in reparative therapy and his uncle was the priest at their Catholic school, so him getting outed was really not an option]? Yeah, that only friend was Pete. But I digress.)

Anyway, Todd’s view of things is a little skewed by how he’s lived them, and strictly speaking, trying to map any of my kids onto the Golden Trio and Company is going to end up being a discussion of archetypes and tropes more than anything else because…… But they’re not the Golden Trio and Company.

There are some similarities, but they are mostly in the realm of archetypes AND the ones that aren’t quite as trope-y happened by accident (like, when I noticed that Seb actually does have quite a few similarities with Ron, aside from having Malfoy money — right down to his dad having an A name (Abraham) and his mom having an M name (Marceline) — I went, “well, FUCK” and started trying to get some of those similarities to be…… less so? Because…… Seb’s not Ron. And I don’t want him to be too overly similar to Ron because I want him to be himself, in his own right.

Fortunately, though, Ron isn’t a filthy rich, gay recovering addict who’s been living with undiagnosed major depression for his entire life and sort of accidentally stumbles into finding his mutant superpowers, and whose abusers aren’t his parents — because Abe and Marceline are pretty chill and have been fab to all four of their kids — but rather a series of douchebag ex-boyfriends who [unlike Molly and Arthur] are for real in-text acknowledged as being abusive jerks, and that’s a pretty solid start on Seb Is Not Ron)

But if you were going to try to do the Golden Trio And Company map here, then Todd would probably be Ginny, actually. They don’t have a lot in common, but there are some points of crossover, and the biggest one for me at the moment? Is that right now, I’m guilty of something that I bag on JKR for doing all the time, which is, “Ginny is a great idea for a character but you didn’t fully actualize her like she deserved in the text, you regularly reduced her existence to being Harry’s Significant Other, and it’s frankly bogus, Joanne” — and I’m aware of this, so I’m trying to fix it by working on Todd as a character

But I’m also trying to not spend forever fine-tuning every last detail about a story and then not having a draft of it so much as I have a two-foot stack of print-outs about different parts of it that kinda sorta look like a complete picture when you arrange them just so and tilt your head slightly to the left. So, basically, at the moment? Getting Todd to be more fully realized is on my List Of Shit To Do, but it’s way less of a priority than, “actual complete draft of this train-wreck” because I can do some of this work in revisions and rewriting

But since I opened this door anyway and want to complete the thought for the amusement factor:

Seb, obviously, is Harry in the bigger picture, even if this is mostly based on, “Harry is The Protagonist of his series, and although MY series is ultimately going to be more of an ensemble cast thing, Seb is the focal character for the first book because, in fairness to all the others, he was here first”

Todd is Ginny for the reasons that I just said

Pete and Margot both have very fair claim to being either Ron or Hermione, so they could arguably take turns, and ultimately, the big reason why I’m going to say Pete’s Ron and Margot’s Hermione?

is that Pete has two older siblings and some Issues with both of them (though he’s working them out with his sister, and not so much with his older brother) and has been Seb’s friend longer

while Margot’s an only child and they have totally used the, “we’re both gay, we love each other like brother and sister” line when they don’t feel like explaining their no romo soulmates kind of relationship to people (and sometimes when trying to make Seb’s siblings be less…… not pleased that Margot is so important to him, because to varying degrees, all three of them kinda sorta blame her for some of his problems in ways that she doesn’t entirely deserve)

Lucy is Neville but, like, a plucky ginger lesbian. This is probably one of the comparisons that looks a lot more like reaching, because on the surface, Lucy has a lot more in common with Ginny outside of their roles in the plot — but the thing is?

Even once I get Todd to be more developed, and even if he and Seb aren’t endgame (which was my original plan and I might stick to it but they have a LOT of shit to work on before they can go there so we’ll see how that goes), Todd is still going to be Ginny’s closest analogue to me because the ideas of them and their arcs are closer than anyone else’s (though in fairness, my idea of Ginny and her arc isn’t necessarily anybody else’s because JKR botched writing Ginny so much that this is almost, “room for wild mass guessing” instead of, “room for interpretation”)

Whereas…… yes. Lucy comes on strong, she’s a plucky go-getter who would probably try to fight the sun if she thought the sun was looking at her girlfriend funny, she’s a complete loudmouth and not always in ways that are conducive to anything, she’ll call you on your shit but usually without realizing that she’s saying something she needs to be hearing too, she tries too hard to do everything on her own and usually needs to experience some kind of big setback before she’ll consider accepting help with anything, and she will probably shout at someone while telling them to go calm down because they told HER to calm down.

Also, she’s the only one in my main ensemble cast who’s a legit Gryffindor, for better and for worse (Pete is a Slytherin — though in fairness, Gryffindor is his secondary House [he is aware of this, thanks to an ex of his who made him get Pottermore Sorted and was dead shocked when he wound up in Slytherin, but he has no idea what this means but he’s offended by it because Gryffindor’s colors are red and gold and no thanks, he doesn’t like how he looks in red and gold. He loves how he looks in green and silver, though] — and Josie’s a Ravenclaw)

—but a lot of how Over-The-Top Extra™ she is? that comes out of insecurity and trying to be various things that aren’t true to herself, because she deeply believes that she isn’t good enough. Granted, a big difference between her and Neville is that, while Neville spends a lot of time in the early books being terrified of his potential because he might screw up and prove right everyone who’s ever called him useless, Lucy instead tries to outrun her all of feelings of self-doubt and self-loathing instead of dealing with them, and basically plays a game of, “if I ignore them and just act like the popular idea of me — or like the me I want to be — but louder, maybe they will go away!!”

She’s going to be shocked when this catches up to her, because when she first shows up in the story, she’s of the mind that hey, she has accepted that she’s a lesbian — even if she’s only out to a small handful of people because…… uh, she’s Damian’s baby sister and their parents are still Not Really Very Safe to come out to. Their dad is probably going to die without Lucy coming out to him and she has VERY fair reasons for being afraid that he’d disown her for this — but!!! She has still accepted this!!!! Clearly it was the ONLY THING in her life that she wasn’t at peace with and now she IS so everything is going to magically be ALL BETTER NOW RIGHT!!!!!

No, not really, Lucy. Your sexuality is just one of the things about yourself that you aren’t at peace with.

Lucy’s response: *throws herself even harder into trying to outrun her self-doubt and being completely disingenuous to herself in the process, while trying to smile and laugh like nothing is wrong even though it really blatantly is*

So, that’s all going over about as well as you’d expect (i.e., not very well, not even a little bit whoops), and a lot of her arc in the series is going to be about finding peace with herself and finding her own ways of being a hero that may not necessarily line up with any more conventional expectations thereof, or even her own preconceived ideas of How To Hero Good, and yeah. She’s Neville, but like, a plucky ginger lesbian.

Also, she and Seb are foils for each other in a loooooot of ways that make them mapping onto Harry and Neville make more sense than trying to make Lucy map onto Ginny, in structural terms

Josie is Luna, and I’m short-changing my genderfluid empath child a lot right now but I’ve also been writing this post for WAAAAAY longer than I intended and ahahaha, everyone’s probably bored

And Conrad is Draco Malfoy, but absent any of the excuses that fans love making for Draco (especially not the age thing, like. Draco behaves in a LOT of ways that are completely unacceptable for any person of ANY age, but I will acquiesce that his age is a contributing factor in some instances because he’s a freaking CHILD. Conrad’s not, though. Like, Conrad is 46 and the oldest member of the main cast in the first book. Conrad gets no excuse for his bullshit based on his age.

He also doesn’t get to claim anything about being terrified for the safety of the people he cares about, because…… uh. While I think that the HP fandom oversells that point re: Draco in HBP because at first, he was completely gung-ho and proud of himself for joining a group of Pureblood supremacist domestic terrorist fascists, Draco was still abused and manipulated by Voldemort here — and during the entirety of HBP and DH — and…… well. Conrad was lied to and played by people who are even bigger douchebags than he is, yeah. But he wasn’t sold on joining the neo-fascist supervillains by having his loved ones threatened; he was sold on it by having his ego stroked and only giving a fuck about how this could benefit him)

So, basically, Conrad is Draco with even fewer redeeming qualities

Given that I think Draco only has, like, TWO redeeming qualities, or maybe three on a good day (and that’s debatable because at least one point here is, “it’s not really a quality of his own so much as the fact that I hate victim blaming more than I dislike Draco”), uh

Yeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaah, no.

Conrad is only not The Literal WORST EVER because there are other douchebags in his neo-fascist supervillain club who are even worse than he is.

i just love my oc mutant weirdos a lot, thank u for reading

#bizeke #that story with the mutants that i should find a working title for fml #mine: asks #memes for ts #mine: writing #mine: teen wolf #mine: hp #mine: headcanons #mine: meta #(for a very very loose definition of the term 'meta' oops)#sebastian moncrieff: mutant disaster #pete arden: dramatic disaster #lucy murphy: hemokinetic disaster #todd burroughs: art film disaster #josie quinn: empath disaster #margot gabriel: chainsmoking disaster #kassie hush #opinions for ts #asks for fanfic writers

3 notes · View notes