#woman gendered terms for men and man gendered terms for women

[psychiatricwarfare]

i think sometimes people forget that there's more than one way to be trans & that bigots Do Not Care what flavour of trans you are, they want us all dead so can we please stop arguing over things that literally dont matter and lift each other up instead of tearing each other down? im sick of this afab vs amab, tme vs tma, transmasc vs transfemme, the total erasure of transnonbinary & trans intersex individuals (or just nonbinary & intersex ppl in general). im so so so sick of all these new boxes we're trying to stuff each other in when elder trans ppl fought so hard against those boxes!!

for fucks sake, no one trans group has it any better or any worse than any other trans group, we just have it different, the transphobes want us ALL dead - whether its for different reasons or by different means, dead is dead. they dont care if youre tme afab transfemme or if youre tma axab transfemmasc or if youre a god damn clown fish. its all the same "agenda" to them.

im so fucking done seeing posts saying "trans women have No idea what its like to deal with....." or "TMEs fuck off! you're not welcome here!" or any of that shit because THAT is exactly how white supremacists get a foothold in. THAT is how we lose this battle. fucking THAT is how we get divided and conquered. they want us to split up into smaller groups and fight each other, they want us to be too weak to fight back and the way to do that is to wittle down our numbers & until they can get away with outright killing us in broad daylight (more than they already have) they have to make do with splitting us up and turning us against each other

im just sick and tired of all the infighting, you're either with ALL of us or you're with the white supremacists, idfc if you are trans yourself. we need all of us to work together and put our differences aside. it is not that fucking hard to sit yourself down and go "ok well they may not know what it's like to be me, but i dont know what its like to be them either" and realise that turning against other trans ppl just bc "they dont understand" is ridiculous and just a bad move when we're in the middle of a fight for our fucking lives. who cares who's "more oppressed" this isnt the god damn olympics, this is the fight for human rights and right now we need to focus on keeping all of us alive. save your petty irrelevant fucking discourse for when we aren't focused on trying to keep our community ALIVE

#bug talks #bug rants #this is inspired by being transnonbinary & experiencing transmisogyny as well as transandrophobia and they are both equally bad #& way too many of yall binary trans ppl seem to forget about those of us who Do experience what its like to be treated as both #ive been mistaken for a trans woman & a trans man more times than i can fuckin count #they are both insidious #but way too many of yall are too busy arguing over who has it worse and whos forcing who out of what space #yall dont even realise that its a community wide issue & people are guilty of this on all sides #but sure keep reinventing gender norms trans edition that's fine #and when we get our throats stomped on and our intestines pulled out by our mouths im sure itll Really matter whos tme or tma #which btw is a term that doesnt even make sense because any person on earth can be a victim of transmisogyny bc transphobes r idiots??? #you cant tell who's trans and who isnt by looking at them and so even cis women and cis men and trans men and intersex folk can experience #transmisogyny so i dont understand what the point of that label even is

[stlangels]

Oh ok wait i think i finally got it ok

#grahambles #this is about like 'transandrophobia' as a useful term #and also how like gender and the patriarchy work. #like sometimes i forget how complicated some of the nitry gritty ideas are #but i did a few days of thinking and i think i have a conception of it #not actually posting a take. #at least unless its super polished #but like basically. yes the transphobia transmen and transwomen face is different #however trans men arent opressed for being men #maybe a better way of putting it is tbat trans men are opressed for being trans men #or that the way trans men experience transphobia is tied to the patriarchy (because the gender binary and patriarchy are inherently linked) #but trans men are oppressed in the way that patriarchy sees us as 'not man enough' #so we arent oppressed for our maleness but for our transness and our failure to adequately embody patriarchal masculinity or femininity #idk if im wording this well #basically its like how the racism black men experience is colored by the fact that they are men but they aren't oppressed for being men #their maleness allows them to attempt to approach patriarchy in a way black women areny allowed to #in a similar way trans men experience the social pressure all men experiemce to fit the idealized patriarchal man #and that ideal man is a man who has and enacts power over women #even if the world beyond doesn’t accept a trans man or it sees him as a woman he will still be influenced by that social pressure #trans men don't want to be excluded from manhood so we may attempt to approach power seeing it as masculine #of vourse we will still be excluded from holding this power because we will be excluded from manhood #however we can still access this power a little. #idk if this makes any sense #and i do think trans men can access patriarchal power sometimes but not in tge way cis men can #this is rambly as hell thats why its staying in the tags #these are half formed thoughts

[faggyangel]

what i love about aziraphale and crowley presenting as female is that they don't switch vessels to do it, there aren't other cis actresses on the side lines for the feminine presentations of these characters. when crowley presents as feminine he doesn't change his face, it's still crowley and it's still aziraphale. i just think it's nice to see gender fluidity represented in a way that doesn't require the person to become cis passing as the gender they present as in the moment

#as a genderfluid person its nice to see that crowley being played by a cismale actor doesn't have to change his entire to appearance #to appear more like a conventionally attractive cis passing woman like no crowley looks how crowley looks and presenting as a woman doesn't #require him to change that #she can still be a woman or a man or neither regardless of how he looks #idk thanks gaiman ig #good omens #gender fluidity represented in shape shifting creatures (for lack of a better term) is so frequently represented by that person changing #like physical shape and played by cis women/cis men and its nice to see a sort of representation that doesn't require that #when i identify as a man one day and a women the next i may dress different or wear a binder depending on how i feel but i do not suddenty #become a cis man or a cis woman i'm still me and i still look the way i look and that doesn't make my identity any less than what it is #does any of this make sense or am i screaming to a void of cis bitches

[vote2]

i do acknowledge i need to watch what i say wrt gender women men cis ppl etc just augh.

#its like. im a trans man 100% i want nothing to do w being seen as a women i acknowledge that. i also acknowledge that I am putting #literally zero effort in my irl life to present as a guy at all. partially lack of resources and embarrassment etc stuff like that partiall #the autism i literally look in a mirror and see a guy #and i go to class go to work and until soemone explicitally refers to me as a woman i think of myself as a guy. so like its this weird #disconnect of what i actually do vs what i percieve as expieriencing in my daily life where i am objectively living #as a cis woman who just dresses and acts a bit masc. lol. #and like that doesnt bother me atm until i get to a setting where i am gendered frequently. then i feel nauseas etc but whatever ill deal #so i always hesitate whenever i talk abt women feminism men makeup beauty expectations etc (also i am mixed thai and white which #def plays into everyhting ofc ofc) as i dont know rly what is like. not fine idc if i say smthn uncouth just i dont want to at all #seem like im doing what these other trans guys do and latch onto my femininity and 'girlhood growing up' etc or like #its all dumb to me ofc im a feminist i consider anything i speak abt feminism free the nipple being against gender essiantialism etc etc #as in feminism (not that women arent/cant be femnists just in terms of im not trying to sound like a woman) and #ofc growing up as and my current life experiences have obvi had a large impact on myself how i veiw the world my political beliefs and all. #but like. im always scared it sounds like im idr the phrase someone else used but a i dont want to seem like im latching onto girlhood as #a failsafe or whatever. its just mm ykwim its a weird feeling. cause like im a 21 year old man and read my posts as such el oh el. #idk its all weird and idk if its a specific to me thing or whattttt it just like. i feel silly sometimes and i dont want my points to be #misconstrued :) anyways me posting this after rewatching and posting abt pearl has nothign to do genuinly lmfao just timing its been #on my mind after that dumbass trans guy posting abt the lonelyness he feels abt abandoning womanhood #after watching barbie. lol and then i saw someone in the comments of some ig quote it w like 30 replies all positive like get a lifeee #i understand it can feel isolating being trans and everyones relationship back to womanhood is diff and complecated but by god. shut up #anywayyyyyssss mmm okay im done whateverr #maybe all a fear in my head and literally none of this has every crossed anyones mind however it bothers me :(

[mejomonster]

As I get older and older I more tangibly realize why queer individuals in older generations than mine might prefer words I wouldn't use for myself, and likewise why younger generations preferences would be different too. Like it was always clear you know, a person knows their identity best and what labels they prefer best and even if you don't get it you should respect it. But I guess the older I get the more I realize I really don't know and never can know the background another person has for their perceptions and meaning for labels and why something in particular helps them to use or not

#rant #lgbt #........................................................................................................................................... #i just. so im alive in the time i guess when i saw trans identities barely discussed like even in educational material i didnt #hear about gender identity until i dug deep. to people now using transmasc and transfemme as labels. labels i dont understand and know #i dont. i presume they mean trans people who identify with masculinity or femininity? but i think im probably wrong #because ive seen transmen call themselves transmasc and it confuses me. because a transman can be a very feminine person who loves makeup #so. one cannot say transmasc and actually Mean all trans men. a transfemme does Not include all transwomen because transwomen can be butch #and reject femininity. so like... from my outdated perception i see it as the cis straight societal gender expectations of men MUST be masc #women MUST be femme which. i hate. becayse i specifically feel all people should and can be whatever they want. #any man can be feminine any woman can be masculine any person can be any range on that and change daily and do what they want #and their gender is still valid. and then like. theres ppl like me. im nonbinary. im a pretty feminine guy #im a fairly masculine woman. i dont think i could even fit into transmasc or transfemme labels. #i do think those labels help and suit people who like them. if i met a nonbinary lipstick lesbian perhapa #transfemme would help her xommunicate how she feels. but those words dont help me they are boxes i cant fit inside #and i get why they exist but its like. cool. now i get why transman needs to be preserved Outside of transmasc. because feminine trans men #still need space. i get why masculinjty and femininity need to mean something clearly Separate from gender itself or we loose the ability #to express the range of gender expression in qll areas. i dont know what transexual means but now i realize why a person older than me #may LIKE that label and cling to it. because it may communicqte something For Them that helps them in a #way that was lost to understanding by my generation. in a way that the terms no longer useful for my self identity but is for them. #in the way that trans man and nonbinary fit me but i could never be fit within the labels of transmasc or transfem etc #and in the way that for some people transmasc etc labels will fit Them and Help in a way a label like transman never can. and so on

[reenaria]

currently having a queer identity crisis on this accursed holiday

#but actually. i’ve realized that like. 95% or more of my attraction to men has been comphet #i thought it wasn’t because i’ve been more or less identifying as bi since i was 11 #so like. i figured if i didn’t like men at all i would’ve figured it out sooner? #it wasn’t until a couple years ago that i resolved to stop dating straight & masculine guys because i feel like i’m performing for them #and my current partner of 2.5 years is amab and socially perceived as a man but he’s bi and sees himself as ‘void of gender’ #which is also the way i see him but not the way most people see him #he does get mistaken for a woman a fair ammount though. which brings us both a lot of joy lol #but anyway. my crisis is that i’ve been feeling more and more detached from the bi label because i feel like it implies attraction to men #and i’ve known for a little while now that i’m almost exclusively attracted to femininity and androgyny #and primarily attracted to women in general #like if i weren’t with my partner i would 100% be out there dating women and maybe? identifying as a lesbian #but i feel like i have no claim to that label especially with my current partner who is not a woman and is much more androgynous than fem #idk. do i keep calling myself bi? it feels like i’ve slipped away from it #i’ve been using queer a lot more lately because umbrella terms are the only thing that seem to make sense to me anymore #i know labels can be super complicated and unhelpful in some cases but i also want to know where my place is in the community ya know? #i feel so confused without a solid label and it’s causing me a lot more stress than it should #(also my partner is such a blessing and said he’d be supportive if i ever felt i needed to leave him to be with women) #(like he said ‘i’d be sad for a while but i’d still be your best friend) and i was just 🥺 #this may be even longer than my last tag novel lmao i just hate the idea of putting this stuff in the body of the post #anyway if any pals/mutuals read all that and have any insight or advice i’d be curious to hear #reena.txt

[emilyinhalf]

.

#like i know i can't stop people from using whatever label to describe their sexuality #but the idea that there can't be a specific term that refers to a sexuality that doesn't include men fucking sucks #like so much of my understanding of my own gender as a trans woman is rejecting manhood in every way it exist #i feel like i identify with lesbianism than with being a trans woman because the complete dissociation of women from men that comes with it #idk what i'm trying to say but i think there needs to be a definable sexuality that does not include man

[matriarchsdevotee-archive]

Good afternoon, you cannot define "amazon" in greek antiquity in a self-consistent way that doesn't include every reasonable woman in the epics

#out of character #I'm playing hades again and remembering the early days of gerudo research #for a fantasy category that's so well defined and consistent in modern tropes #christ god is it difficult to include all amazons while exluding others #it's partially because saying “ancient greece” is like saying “England” and expecting everything to apply from 200 AD to modern day england #but. realstically the best way to describe an amazon without excluding them is “woman who has had violent thoughts towards men”? #you could maybe make the argument that any woman who kills a man in the epics is an amazon #and in some texts that's true #but that also includes a lot of women who are *not* supposed to be amazons thematically #because the term “amazon” has to carry a measure of fear and disgust in most texts and #listen it's complicated #all i wanted to know was about women who rode horses and we got into athenians being bizarre about gender again

[orphanbasement]

Always remember that "words mean nothing - all genders/pronouns are made up" only applies on an individual basis and never on a mass-scale basis

#posts from the orphanbasement #it's wonderful that you can refer to yourself as a man or woman or it or anything under the sun #however that should NEVER be applied to people who haven't explicitly stated they're okay with it #don't call gay men you've never met queen/miss thing. don't call random trans women online dude/bro #Words ARE all made up but. They do still hold meaning. Be it objective or subjective that should always be respected #seriously I do hope that one day we'll all address and unpack the impact that the 'gender is fake words are fake' narrative #has HAD on the conversation about gender and identity #on one hand it's been beautiful and amazing to witness the definition of gender be expanded massively #and it's given a lot of queer people who felt isolated prior due to the 'id as whatever you want who cares' mindset-- #--being ridiculed en masse #(of course it's important to note that nothing is perfect in terms of that. far from it) #(there are very much still people attacking and mocking those who have 'nonconventional' ways of iding/expressing-- #--their gender both outside and inside the queer community. but things HAVE improved) #and truly I'm glad for radical acceptance #but on the other hand it has undeniably lead to things LIKE trans women being mocked and disrespected #for not wanting to be called dude/bro #and women in general being laughed at for not wanting to be called bitches or cunts #I don't think they are slurs but they undeniably have deep misogynistic connotations #it's very reasonable that some women out there might not be okay with being called those #words do mean things. #maybe good to note that I say this as somebody who does NOT care what you refer to them as

[psychoticallytrans]

I do wish that "oppositional sexism" was a more commonly known term. It was coined as part of transmisogyny theory, and is defined as the belief that men and women, are distinct, non-overlapping categories that do not share any traits. If gender was a venn diagram, people who believe in oppositional sexism think that "men" and "women" are separate circles that never touch.

The reason I think that it's a useful term is that it helps a lot with articulating exactly why a lot of transphobic people will call a cis man a girl for wearing nail polish, then turn around and call a trans woman a man. Both of those are enforcement of man and woman as non-overlapping social categories. It's also a huge part of homophobia, with many homophobes considering gay people to no longer really belong to their gender because they aren't performing it to their satisfaction.

It's a large part of the reason behind arguments that men and women can't understand each other or be friends, and/or that either men or women are monoliths. If men and women have nothing in common at all, it would be difficult for them to understand each other, and if all men are alike or all women are alike, then it makes sense to treat them all the same. Enforcing this rift is particularly miserable for women and men in close relationships with each other, but is often continued on the basis that "If I'm not a real man/woman, they won't love me anymore."

One common "progressive" form of oppositional sexism is an idea often put as the "divine feminine", that women are special in a way that men will never understand. It's meant to uplift women, but does so in ways that reinforce the idea that men and women are fundamentally different in ways that can never be reconciled or transcended. There's a reason this rhetoric is hugely popular among both tradwifes and radical feminists. It argues that there is something about women that men will never have or know, which is appealing when you are trying to define womanhood in a way that means no man is or ever has been a part of it.

You'll notice that nonbinary people are sharply excluded from the definition. This doesn't mean it doesn't apply to them, it means that oppositional sexism doesn't believe nonbinary people of any kind exist. It's especially rough on multigender people who are both men and women, because the whole idea of it is that men and women are two circles that don't overlap. The idea of them overlapping in one person is fundamentally rejected.

I think it's a very useful term for talking about a lot of the problems that a lot of queer people face when it comes to trying to carve out a place for ourselves in a society that views any deviation from rigid, binary categories as a failure to perform them correctly.

[supercool-here]

Why did barbie (the movie) start so solid and then go nowhere at the end?

#What about barbie going to the gynecologist? #Seriously you guys #I read so so so many comments and posts about this movie #I felt like I had already watched it #And I liked the movie you guys talked about way more than the movie I just watched #It didn't feel like it was about growing up #I felt like Greta Gerwig was just vomiting terms at my face #All I think about it is: #Barbieland is a reflection of the patriarchy: when only one gender has the upper hand there will always be someone miserable and some disor #And at first I thought they were gonna make a point that both women and men are important and have to participate to make a good world #But then #Idk Barbie just isn't the own it thinks it is #EXCEPT FOR AMERICA FERRERA'S SPEECH THAT WAS SO TRUE I LIKED IT #I also think ken is a reflection of how women are sexualized and objectified #Ken was created useless and Barbie was the whole focus #When both man and woman go together #Well that's how it should be #Anyway I watched a movie that made me sad and made me feel like I wasn't thinking enough and bleh

[ifeelfreewithoutmyshoes]

It’s always interesting stumbling upon those people on the internet that are just so clearly wrong you don’t even want to argue

#I read trhoigh a discussion where person A felt like they were missing the point totally #as in a cis man called himself queer for dating a non-binary person #which person a thought was wrong and perpetrated that trans women were men (bc the enby person presented femme) #like no hats not even the scenario??? #anyway the person at some point went no he’s not queer bc queer is when you’re attracted to the same gender (aka gay) #(not gay but I don’t wanna rewrite the tag) #…. I’m sorry?? what?? #I had to laugh when I read it #like my dude that is just wrong you know??? #its literally an umbrella term with soooo many identities under it #I’m queer but I am also a woman very much not into other women #sigh…. it’s almost funny if not so tiring #me

[genderqueerdykes]

let's popularize the term crossdresser again. a lot of people denounce the term because they feel it is belittling to their trans identity, and that is totally fine. trans people are not inherently crossdressers. not everyone who dresses a certain way that's "contradictory" to their gender is crossdressing. not everyone needs to embrace the term, but for many, it is exactly what suits them.

whether you are a trans man who dresses fem while fully identifying as a man, a trans woman who dresses masc while fully identify as a woman, a cis woman who dresses in mens clothing, a cis man who dresses in women's clothing, a nonbinary person who dresses in a presentation that feels "opposite" of the gender, a genderfluid person whose gender and presentation change to be "opposites", an intersex person who dresses "opposite" to their identity, or literally anyone else, whoever you are, if you feel your presentation is crossdressing, this is your nudge to use the term if you feel it suits you.

when i am feeling more like a man, i dress very effeminately. whenever i am feeling more like a woman, i dress very butch. crossdressing is a wonderful way to express one's presentation and gender, and to play with the societal expectations ascribed to our genders. it's a good term. i love you, fellow crossdressers

#trans #transgender #lgbtqia #lgbtq #lgbt #queer #crossdresser #cd #transsexual #nonbinary #non binary #transmasculine #transmasc #ftm #trans man #trans men #transfeminine #transfemme #transfem #mtf #trans woman #trans women #genderqueer #enby #genderfluid #intersex #our writing #about us

[communistkenobi]

“I use bro and dude in a gender neutral way” okay but the fact that dude and bro can be argued to be gender neutral at all is because of patriarchy lol. ‘man’ is positioned as the ideal default and can be used to stand in for humanity in general (“mankind” “the rights of men” etc), ‘woman’ is a lesser variant of human being and thus can only be used to refer to women (that’s why this argument gets even more absurd if you swap out dude/bro for ‘girl/girlie/sis’). And this gender neutral male default is still obviously fucking gendered, words like “mankind” are deeply loaded, gendered, racialised terms and these same loaded assumptions inform how other masculine terms are universalised and used in a ‘gender neutral’ way. White bourgeois masculinity is being imposed as universal, and through this universalising process is considered neutral, but what is ‘neutral’ is itself a matter of political and economic domination, an inherent part of which is patriarchy. We don’t arrive at “brother” as a universal term by accident

and like I thought we’d figured out that actual gender neutral language is the way forward, I remember all those insufferable debates from a couple years ago where reactionaries were having a collective meltdown about people using ‘they’ as a singular pronoun (which they’re still mad about lol!). we even got some cishet people to start using the word ‘partner’ instead of boy/girlfriend/wife/husband. Even if we didn’t, I think you are operating in bad faith in trans spaces if you adopt such a cavalier attitude to the things people want and don’t want to be called. Like sorry to do another type of universalism but trans people are a group that have pretty sensitive and complicated relationships to gendered language for reasons that should be incredibly obvious to everyone, even if you use bro/dude in ‘gender neutral’ ways, you don’t get to decide how other trans people feel about those terms and you definitely don’t get to dismiss their feelings with “calm down bro”

so like you should interrogate why it’s even possible to make this argument to begin with, especially because you are using this patriarchal default to misgender trans women only to then tell them to calm down because it’s ‘gender neutral,’ as if trans women somehow aren’t aware of these patriarchal linguistic assumptions and don’t deal with it every day of their lives

#even old new york was once new amsterdam

[genderkoolaid]

Mustarjil is an Arabic term meaning “becoming [a] man.” Although it can be used derogatorily to refer to women who are perceived as having a masculine appearance and/or mannerisms, in Iraq’s marshes, it existed as a gender identity. Within the context of the Ahwari community, Mustarjil was a common gender identity, where people assigned female at birth decide to live as a man after puberty, and this decision was generally accepted in the community. The Mustarjils were one of many similar third gender categories around the world, such as the Hijras in South Asia. [...] “One afternoon, some days after leaving Dibin, we arrived at a village on the mainland. The sheikh was away looking at his cultivations, but we were shown to his mudhif by a boy wearing a head-rope and cloak, with a dagger at his waist. He looked about fifteen and his beautiful face was made even more striking by two long braids of hair on either side. ln the past all the Madan (Ahwari) wore their hair like that, as the Bedu still did. After the boy had made us coffee and withdrawn, Amara asked, ‘Did you realize that was a mustarjil?’ I had vaguely heard of them, but had not met one before. ‘A mustarjil is born a woman’. ‘She cannot help that; but she has the heart of a man, so she lives like a man.’ ‘Do men accept her?’ ‘Certainly. We eat with her and she may sit in the mudhif. When she dies, we fire off our rifles to honour her. We never do that for a woman. In Majid’s village there is one who fought bravely in the war against Haji Sulaiman.’ ‘Do they always wear their hair plaited?’ ‘Usually they shave it off like men.’ ‘Do mustarjils ever marry?’ ‘No, they sleep with women as we do.’” Thesiger continues to narrate several other accounts of mustarjils within the same community, as well that of a “stout middle-aged woman” who wanted to remove her male organ in order to “turn into a proper woman.” Thesiger later mentions: “Afterwards I often noticed the same [person] washing dishes on the river bank with the women. Accepted by them, [she] seemed quite at home. These people were kinder to [her] than we would have been in our society.” Around that time, Britain was still living under the shadow of Victorian norms, and gender non-normative people were still stigmatized and shunned. Communities such as the Ahwaris, presented an alternative model that created space for communities like the mustarjils, despite the dominant gender binary. 

— Recovering Arab Trans History: Masoud El Amaratly, the Folk Music Icon from Iraq’s Marshes by Marwan Kaabour

#m.