#why he SHOULDN'T like himself | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

starry-bi-sky · 3 months

Text

I'm having incoherent thoughts about clone danny again from the clone/clone^2 au (when am I not?) but more specifically I'm thinking about his reaction to finding out he's a clone. The standalone clone au digs into that a little more than clone^2, which is more focused on Danny and Damian's relationship. But neither (so far) really get into Danny's issues about finding out he's a clone after 15 years of thinking he wasn't.

Because he resents his parents for not telling him for so long. He resents the way he found out; through a trivial school project rather than a sit-down talk. He resents the fact that, apparently, they had meant to tell him sooner. But forgot. He resents the fact that they never told him because finding out feels like something was stolen from him when it had the chance to not be.

Danny Fenton, just fifteen, cloned not even half a year ago, knows what that personal violation of autonomy feels like. He knows what it's like to be cloned and while he loves Ellie, he does, she's his sister, and in this au his twin. But he is still left with that feeling of unsafety after realizing he'd been cloned. Being cloned is violating. The onset realization that it's so easy to get DNA without the other party noticing, and that what was stopping someone from trying to clone him again?

Followed only after with the rest of the inexplainable mix of feelings of being cloned, the rest of that inner conflict and panic that's an ugly mocktail of emotions that range from horror to fear. Trying to imagine what it's like to be cloned from the cloned party, and I imagine that it leaves you with the feeling of needing to crawl out of your own skin with discomfort.

And then he gets put on the other side of it. Danny Fenton, only fifteen, was cloned not even half a year ago, finding out he is a clone. And reactions, I imagine, can vary from person to person. But to him, it feels like something got stolen from him, like someone took a hole puncher and stuck it right into his chest and stole a chunk of himself from him.

It changes nothing about him and yet it changes everything. It's a betrayal on it's own to just find out he was a clone and they didn't tell him for fifteen years -- it shouldn't mean anything, because he's still Danny, and yet it means everything. It's him, it's him, it's about him. It's his personhood. It's about the fact that a load-bearing rock in his identity just crumbled beneath his feet and now there's a rockslide.

Because then he finds out that they used the wrong DNA. Its like pouring salt in an open wound. He's not even related to his parents or his sister, when for years he thought he was. It's the fact that pieces of his identity that he's been so secure in for so long just got ripped away from him in an instant. Then they tell him -- only through his own horrified prompting -- that the person whose DNA they used -- Bruce Wayne -- didn't even know he existed. That they accidentally used the wrong DNA, then didn't tell the person whose DNA they used.

The betrayal of being lied to for years turns really quickly into horror at his own existence. Something very similar to the horror he felt at being cloned and the skin-crawling discomfort that made him feel like his own skin wasn't really his. And then its not. It's actually not. Nothing but his own name feels like it belongs to him anymore -- not his hair, not his eyes, not his heart or his lungs, nothing feels like his anymore and he didn't know what that felt like until it was gone.

It's a question of Nature Vs. Nurture -- where does the line of "nature" begin and where does the line of "nurture" end? What of him is actually his? What of him is Bruce Wayne's? It's not logical, it's not supposed to be. It's a load-bearing wall on the house of his identity being destroyed and now everything else is caving down in on him. What belongs to Danny, what belongs to Bruce Wayne?

#dpxdc #dp x dc #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dp x dc crossover #dpxdc crossover #dpdc #clone^2 #danny fenton is a clone #its a combination 'oh my god i've been cloned too i know how violating that feels holy fuck' empathy and also the horror of finding out tha #the things you knew about yourself that you thought were unchanging was all WRONG.#its the fact that tragedy is always one step away from comedy. they're twins for a reason. the humor of finding out you're a clone through #a silly school project and the *horror* of finding out you're a clone from a silly school project instead of a proper conversation #danny goes into his room after he's done talking to his parents and he vomits into the garbage can under his desk. utterly horrified #and he calls sam and tucker crying. it shouldn't change anything he knows this and yet it changes EVERYTHING. he doesn't feel like himself #he doesnt feel like himself any*more.* this might be cause for him to do a closet overhaul. something to make himself feel like he's #in control of himself again. piercings. temporary hair dye. *something* to feel like he's in control.#its no wonder why he never wants to tell bruce wayne he exists because he *knows* how violating that feels and he's *afraid.*#it makes him takinh in damian a little more remarkable bc it undoubtedly made #his identity issues worse. but thats a child and a child who needs help and danny is *kind*

330 notes · View notes

taka-chan · 6 months

Text

the first thing you learn about Eragon - that he had heard all the horrific stories about the mountains that locals have constant terror of and he was still going there since he was 15yo - is all you really need to know about him

#like he knew and told himself ohh why not why shouldn't i #buy him a pack of self preservation #eragon reread #eragon #inheritance cycle

188 notes · View notes

demigod-of-the-agni · 6 months

Text

Local man, his two boyfriends and his two girlfriends buy TRANS ICON BLÅHAJ

#flash travasso hoarding all the blahajs seems so right to me. like ofc he would.#enby flash real..#stop i just realised flash and pavitr and hari are dressed up in traffic colours???? oh my god #traffic light boys + comic accurate outfit girls #faceless hari shouldn't scare me but it does. why does he look like this. im sorry baby boy #pavitr is holding two. yes. he's trans didn't you know? he told me himself #they're all trans why lie actually.#i want a blahaj so bad...... maybe when i get enough money i shall finally bring him home..........#pavitr prabhakar #spider man india #spider man #meera jain #gayatri singh #flash travasso #hari oberoi #atsv #across the spiderverse #artoftheagni #mythic mumbattan au #how fuckin funny would it be if pavitr got a blahaj for his birthday lol hahahaa. for the birthday fic. that would be so funny. haha. 👁️#coffee bean gang

253 notes · View notes

recitedemise · 6 months

Text

𝗚𝗮𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗶𝘁𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗲𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗵. That said, when speaking of his paramour with the mention of Mystra, it is not a slight. After all, Mystra, the goddess, wasn't just his lover; she, as she'll remain, controls the Weave.

As a scholar of magic for all his life, Gale is thoroughly enamored with it. He's always had the Weave, casting spells and enchantments for as far as his long memory goes, and there's no power on earth that can pale that devotion. When Gale says Mystra's name, in love, it is never with yearning. When he tells his lover that he forgets his goddess when he stands beside them, he means quite literally that he foregoes his faith. He doesn't mention her like a quality benchmark with which they've somehow surpassed, but to punctuate how wholly he has fallen for them. With a new, honest love, he is turned entirely from Mystra. In fact, so utterly bewitched, he's like a born again man. He isn't besotted by his goddess, held stalwart in her sway and seemingly, abundantly, and frustratingly stubborn. After that disastrous relationship, I promise you, Gale spares not a single thought toward her. She might have control of the Weave, and as such, stands still his only patron deity, but his new, doting lover? They become something of a new religion for him; he is most devoted, taken by, and so loyal to them.

He does not see Mystra. Do not assume he still feels for her.

He's a man of one love, and they will have all of him.

#HEADCANON.#Never go into the Gale tag because the fandom has such bad faith interpretations of Gale 24/7 #I say as another bad take makes me type this up.#Gale isn't still hung up on her GOD. Stop.#Stop saying 'Gale keeps mentioning Mystra when we're being romantic and it's so annoying.'#Dude. Mystra is his LITERAL god. He is saying YOU ARE HIS NEW FAITH.#Oh my god. Stop misinterpreting it. He isn't still ENAMORED with Mystra.#UGHHHHHHHH.#He got out of an abusive relationship and is finding out THIS is what love is #that this love IS something he can put his faith and heart in.#And you reduce him to... guy that can't get over ex tee hee?#Tell me why I shouldn't make your milk curdle.#Someone: the astral sex scene is just him reliving his moment with Mystra.#Or get this... he himself has basically largely only had sex and intimacy through that realm #and knows it to be pleasurable. He wants his partner to know pleasure beyond all imagination. THAT'S IT.#People make me [semi truck comically long honk].#This man makes it a POINT that his heart is made ONLY for one and you all just?!?!? Talk like this!?! You wound Dean. [third person talk]#Anyway (breathes). I'm normal now. I will be on later cuz big things cane up at work. peace.

62 notes · View notes

camgoloud · 1 year

Text

one small detail that stood out to me about this latest episode that i haven’t seen anyone else talking about yet is that when the commentators are calling colin “inspiring” and the “man of the match,” they are celebrating him not for actually scoring the goals himself, but for providing the crucial assists to make both of them happen. and i really love that because for me it’s the absolute perfect wrap to his character arc across all three seasons!

like, we know that colin’s job on this team has never been to score goals. in fact i’m pretty sure we’ve never heard about a single goal that he has scored. colin is and always has been a team player, not a star—and we’ve seen that crop up over and over. notably, we’ve seen the fact that he’s not entirely at peace with that crop up over and over: see the way he was affected by nate’s entire holidy-inn-painting monologue, being benched to make room for zava, etc.—like, this is the thing he’s sensitive about! this is where all of his insecurities come from!

but at the SAME TIME it’s also tied very intimately with all his struggles re: hiding his sexuality— “colin’s a chameleon,” etc. it’s fascinating because there’s SO much tension there between colin 1. feeling bad about the fact that he never stands out on the pitch the way some of his teammates do, because of who he is on the team, and 2. feeling like he CAN’T stand out, ever, because of Who He Is As A Person. etc. it’s like. he’s filling this role in the background. he’s afraid he’s not doing it well enough. he’s afraid that what and who he is isn’t good enough and isn’t worthy of recognition. he wishes he were someone different. trying to be someone different in the locker room is clearly making him so unhappy and stressed out. it is All Connected and my thoughts have been doing laps around it at an ever-increasing rate since i watched episode 2.07 ‘headspace’ if not before!

and all of this is why it’s so incredible to me that in the end, colin’s big moment comes from making assists and not goals! because on the one hand i understand the fandom desire for the colin post-coming out glowup that we all knew was coming—to see him, like, ~prove everybody wrong about him~ and inspire people by suddenly becoming a standout player and scoring goals left and right, even though that never used to be his role on the team before. and don’t get me wrong, i was 100% on board that train, and would have loved it for him if that was how it went down in the end, also. i think he should get to score here and there! as a treat! especially now that richmond are playing total football and there’s been so much emphasis placed on how it’s not just jamie/dani/occasionally sam who are making all the goals anymore!

but i don’t know! especially after the events of the last few episodes, there’s something very special to me about getting to see a colin who, rather than becoming someone entirely new in the moments right after coming out, just feels free to become, and be at peace with, the best version of the same self he’s always been. he’s still a team player first and foremost, but now that he’s not as weighed down by the need to chameleon/hide/pretend to be someone he’s not, he’s so much better at it. and everyone sees this! he gets to be celebrated for his contributions within the role he’s always played! he (and everybody else!) finally recognizes the value that he adds to the team just by being himself—fully himself! it resolves all the tension and insecurity that we’ve seen him struggling with this whole time, on every level. and so this moment was genuinely the perfect ending for his journey in my opinion—i’m so so happy that we were tall enough to join him on the ride here, and so excited to see what he does going forward these last few episodes now that some of that pressure is off him <3

#it's like. he doesn't want to be a spokesperson! he shouldn't have to End Homophobia by becoming zava 2.0! in fact it would not be possible #for him to do this even if he DID come out publicly and then became the best goal-scorer the league has ever seen because the people who are #the problem will ALWAYS manage to find something to attack him for no matter what he does #what's important to me and i think to him as well is that he has the confidence in himself that he needs to perform at his own personal best #and that his teammates recognize this and support him the same way he has always supported them both on and off the pitch #and while a part of me would have liked to see a public coming-out arc i completely get why they're not going there. it would be a lot to #tackle and this season is already getting justified criticism for spreading itself too thin #i think it would have been POSSIBLE to do and do well but. it would place a LOT of constraints on the entire rest of the plot #and i do recognize somewhere in the back of my brain that colin is not ACTUALLY the protagonist of this show for most people #so them choosing to take the character in the ‘i don’t want to be a spokesperson’ direction instead makes sense and was handled very well #anyway. one other reason i’m pleased about all of this is that while most of my recent tl fic is no longer canon-compliant as of this week.#i sure did NAIL the happy ending being an assist and not a scored goal. have been thinking these thoughts for WEEKS and i feel so vindicated #ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #colin hughes

130 notes · View notes

worstloki · 11 months

Text

not a fan of people saying Odin and Loki are similar in a moral or decisive sense, particularly when it comes to Thor. that makes it sound like Loki doesn't know Thor or care about him beyond what he symbolises (regarding Asgard/the throne/family/worthiness), when that's a defining part of their relationship

#like i get WHY people go 'oh Thor is like Frigga (they care™/bring Emotions in) and Loki is like Odin (calculating™ /For The Greater Good)'#but if you make such a clearcut comparison you neglect a lot of stuff that Odin and Loki do drastically different #like there are literal contrasts that are pretty evident around Thor particularly #like Odin does expect Thor to be some ideal version of himself that obeys Odin implicitly and doesn't have his own volatile emotions?#while Loki more sees that Thor isn't who he tries to pretend to be and generally encourages Thor to realize that #the most obvious parallel would be how they in TDW try telling Thor that Jane won't work out #and Odin goes for the whole 'well they're insignificant' angle despite Thor caring about the humans and Jane particularly #Odin tries to go 'here's Sif and since you shouldn't have your own preferences (they're wrong and bad) consider my choice'#he largely disregards Thor's emotions #most people do on Asgard????#like it's literally wild how everyone saw Thor being major depressed and they basically told him to pretend to cheer up #like im sorry Thor's grief means nothing to y;all. he fell in love with someone very mortal and his brother is changed forever #Loki tries putting Thor off by first off. Thor KNOWS Jane isn't going to live long he's not never thought about it #he doesn't even make the decision for Thor he tells him to consider his choice well bc it WILL hurt him when she's gone #Loki is like treats Thor like a person and Odin is like nah I own him #I feel like in converting the brother/father relationship difference over people lose the differences in those aspect #they skip to similarities of heartlessness and Machiavellian ends meeting the means when Loki overall is #a far more moral character than Thor (at the start of Thor's arc) and Odin. and a lot of culturally Asgardian ideas #that's literally part of Loki's original characterization that he DIDN'T match up with their views #he didn't do stuff like take killing lightly like it's for fun and that's one of a long list of obvious aspects that make the setup cool #don't tell me Odin and Loki are the same #like there's some blanket understanding that Loki doesn't show or care about the people he loves #while Thor and Frigga have always been softhearted and refused to sacrifice themselves for what is deemed better for everyone #don't mistake selfishness for apathy and don't say Loki didn't cry himself through the first movie because duty to the throne comes first #that's literally Thor's bit #idk

105 notes · View notes

angorwhosebabyisthis · 1 month

Text

[pericky; a look into ricky's head during their meeting.]

---

"I'm glad you came, I wasn't sure you would." The wine pours, the sound of it drowning out the missing word in that sentence: back.

Of course, is the response, and the part of Ricky that's spent twenty years tearing itself apart to understand why vibrates with relief. It doesn't matter anymore. Of course, of course, he thinks giddily along with the words. He never needed to wonder why Pericles wasn't coming back in the first place; he was always going to.

I'm happy you invited me, and of course he thinks again. A lifetime of pretending he wasn't always going to either falls away. However harsh and lonely the world has been, all's right with it again; and the shy voice of the boy inside him that he's tried so hard to kill says, so quietly, I missed you.

#sdmi #scooby doo: mystery incorporated #pericky #ricky owens #professor pericles #anyway fucking end me actually. lay me down to die #i said i was gonna write more pericky and by fucking god i did #the 'why did you do this to me' to 'oh thank god you didn't actually do this to me' pipeline of abuse folks 🥲#which like. their last conversation is yet another devastating example of ricky finally standing up to pericles' bullshit Too Late #ricky denounces him in the strongest terms he knows; based on his own feelings and opinions and the way he sees the world #(which: even then he can't bring himself to say 'i don't love you anymore')#(the closest he can get is 'i chose you and i can't take it back; the only way i can imagine not loving you is if i never had at all')#and pericles tries to go 'nyeh nyeh whatever i don't care' (and does a real bad job of pretending he is not obviously hurt lmao)#and ricky doesn't try to understand his logic; he doesn't try to reconcile a world where pericles didn't *really* mean to do anything wrong #his response is MAYBE YOU *SHOULD* CARE.#pericles' view of the world and what's right and acceptable are warped and *wrong* and he's the one who needs to get his shit together #'you shouldn't have abused me you shouldn't have killed cassidy you shouldn't have murdered a child in cold blood'#that is MASSIVE and i think it is really telling that pericles' response is to shut him down with force instead of trying to argue any more #and that in the end is the real true fucking tragedy of it all #ricky is making huge strides one after the other to take back his freedom from pericles emotionally #....and materially it makes no difference to improve his situation in the moment; because pericles doesn't have any less power to abuse him #he never has a triumphant moment where he Overcomes His Abuser and Breaks Out of His Control #there's nothing he can do to fight back until pericles is too Literally Dead to control him anymore #it is one of the rawest depictions of the reality of abuse i've ever seen and just. God. i love it so much #(at the same time i REALLY want to explore a version of events where he got the chance to expand further on that growth)#(the 'all witches are selfish; make all things yours; i have a duty' speech from the wee free men comes to mind)#whosebaby makes things #whosebaby writes #SDMItag #dyn: when i die i want you to die too

7 notes · View notes

randomnerd737 · 15 days

Text

mmmmmm Norse mythology

#its so cool #and also just absurd #like #odin can sacrifice himself to himself?#and then he gets magic powers from it?#why not!#half god fucks a gaint #and his kids are a wolf #a girl with a fucked up face #and a snake #it is also a crime punishable by being chained in your children's intestines #but eh! details!#and why shouldn't a guy scoop out his own eye without a second thought just to get smarter?#10/10 would recommend #great mythology #its a shame marvel fucked up everyone's idea of the norse gods

5 notes · View notes

marcusrobertobaq · 3 months

Text

If there's something both fathersonners and hankconnies suck at is keeping Hank's "assholeness" and sarcastic jokes.

Dude is the type mf that would joke bout Connor dating other androids, esp girls, and start talking how all this shit's just a big pain in the ass and how it's better if Connor keep far from humans in this sense 😂 (cuz Connor looks so fucked up he gonna scare mfs)

C'mon, man. Dude jokes bout Connor going to the Eden Club just to see some pretty boys and girls. Connor literally jokes bout mf's interest in machines finally making him being "useful" to the investigation and straight up call mf a dude without life purpose. When they diverge in opinions is even better.

Shippers just ruin 'em dynamic in a way I get surprised how the fucking hell they like a "fanon" so boring. I won't even comment bout fathersonners...

Mfs got the power of ruining one of the best aspects of 'em dynamic (this exchange in sarcasm and questionable jokes - and ofc the swearing) just to put Hank in a good light and get Connor in a toddler's place. This "blorbo" thing, keep it away from me.

I already gotta put up with the game's narrative never punishing Hank for anything and Connor always taking the bad shit for himself and the game punishing u for being real (cuz he's an android), mfs keep saying they're the best part of dbh and the first thing they do is removing the only interesting part of 'em shit just for some stupid romantical interest that basically doesn't fucking exist in canon with everything becoming a uwu or a father/son role selection that is a slap in Hank's almost inexistent character development face, turning him into everything he had always criticized instead of exploring his already existent ideals and trauma, expanding it. Cuz, man, this son of a bitch got lotta shit to learn and Connor bites - dude ain't yo silly lil uwu twink boy. U say shit like that I already know u think he's a "android detective". Yeah, my dick inside your ass.

#hank's world is falling apart but ofc connor is the poor lil one that needs a bear hug from him and guidance #this is ridiculous. hank doesn't know how to handle anything like this and only make things worse #even connor himself doesn't by his bag full of bullshit doesn't matter the route.#that's why i like connor and north. i guess all deviants overall. connor shouldn't seek the approval of humans anymore #androids will help him realizing he fucking matters in all this bullshit. that he got a motherfucking choice #damn i even prefer the android creator himself saying he got a fucking option in all this xD #no tag indeed #just my fucking confessions #delete later? maybe

6 notes · View notes

problemswithbooks · 1 year

Text

I'm not really a fan of Hawks losing his Quirk to AfO. If it serves any purpose it will probably be used to help Izuku fight AfO in the vestige realm which is a fight I was never looking forward to in the first place. Otherwise I don't think it really serves much purpose for Hawks as a character because we're at the end of the story and we just won't get a big focus on how it effects him going forward.

I mean, I see people saying that him losing his Quirk has set him free from the HPSC but he was essentially free from them after the first War. They have been non-existent in the story since than besides passing mentions. From what the reports said last chapter it seems that all the Heroes fighting are doing so of their own pure desire to help, not because the HPSC is paying them or anything. Keigo isn't working for them and given the world ending stakes if he wanted to do anything but beat AfO it'd be a negative trait, not him finding his freedom.

I know people want Keigo to find himself outside of being a Hero and his Quirk but that doesn't really seem to be a theme in the story. If Hori wanted to tell that story he could have done so with Mirio or All Might but he didn't. Instead Mirio was given his Quirk back with little fan fair and All Might's inspiration and Hero heart was reinforced. The story is about people being Heroes not about themselves as just people.

Which is honestly how I see things going with Hawks. His Quirk will be a force for good that helps Izuku beat AfO from the inside proving that despite his saying his Quirk was dirty, he really did/does have the heart of a Hero.

Also, I do think it takes real Hawks out of the story most likely, which is a bit disappointing, though understandable. I never really understood where people got the idea he was going to have a full mental break down anyway and besides him flipping out because he can't help anymore I still don't really see it happening. I mean, Hori is going at light speed here, why would he take the time to focus on Hawks having a mental break when he hasn't even managed to do that for his main three villains yet, who actually need that for the story to end.

I could easily be proven wrong given that Hori's writing is unpredictable, but for the moment my guess is that Hori did this so he could take Hawks out of the fight so he wouldn't get involved with the Todoroki or Ochako/Toga stuff, while also leaving open the possibility to give Izuku a strong ally in Hawks Quirk if needed.

I know people wanted him in those fights, but Hori has a hard time juggling characters in fight scenes, something we've seen a lot in this arc and the one prior. And to be honest he doesn't serve much purpose in them either. I've seen theories of wanting him try and kill Dabi and being devastated because Enji saves his son, essentially picking Touya over him, but Hawks has been nothing but positive about Enji trying to change and help his family. He didn't try and attack Touya or even mention him when he came through the portal, so don't know why he'd suddenly decide to attack him Quirk or not.

When it comes to Toga/Ochako thing he only complicates it. Yes, he killed Twice, but as we've seen Toga's main problem isn't that Twice was killed, it's that Izuku and Ochako, kids around her age don't like her. She feels like no one cares about her because she has a bad Quirk. If getting revenge for Twice was her main objective than she wouldn't have been crying. She doesn't even think about Hawks or name dropped him to my knowledge. If anything she treats all Heroes as guilty. To add Hawks into this fight draws attention away from Ochako, Toga and her main issue of identity. Plus, again I don't see Hawks being upset if Ochako saves Toga in the way he couldn't save Twice. He liked Twice and did try to save him. At most I think we'd see him watching with a happy smile and some tears, not having a full existential crisis.

#bnha spoilers #bnha 385 #bnha Hawks #keigo tamaki #i admit I'm bias in this because the idea that Hawks having to lose his wings to find himself feels a bit gross #like Quirks are shown to be a big part of a person #and he is essentially losing body parts #why can't he just get to enjoy his Quirk outside of being in the HPSC?#it's like if you let a bird out of it's cage but them ripped off it's wings #that's not really any better #and I also don't really want him to have some crisis either #the one caused by Enji makes no sense given he praises Enji for trying to fix things with his family #so idk why he'd suddenly be shocked that Enji wouldn't want his son dead #and although it'd make more sense with the Toga/Twice stuff #I still don't see why it'd end up with him having a mind break #crying tears of joy sure #admitting to Toga he shouldn't have killed Twice maybe #getting a full on mental break down where he screams and cries because he's realized he was the biggest bad #I don't really see #again part of that is bias because Hori made the stakes to high and his villains to eager to murder all of Japan #that it's hard to see Hawks as fully wrong for killing Twice #but also i don't see Hori spending the pages when he already has so much to wrap up #and a lot of those are way more pressing than Hawks having a midlife crisis

26 notes · View notes

oldshrewsburyian · 7 months

Note

Care of Future Times?

This is the Wimseyverse/The Hour crossover that I, uh, just need to figure out how to convert research into plot for *sob*. Have a snippet:

Lord Peter Wimsey, given, after a fashion, his laissez-passer, potters along the hallway until he comes to a mahogany door. He knocks, and waits for the hard-edged voice that says “Come!” Entering, he suspects that the man who stands with long fingers resting elegantly on the corner of his desk is, in fact, bracing himself there. “Sir?” says Randall Brown — a little blankly, a little repressively — and his visitor, who knows that it is good manners and good politics never to show surprise, admires him for it. “Lord Peter Wimsey,” says that gentleman, proffering his card.

#me @ me: why are you like this #i do love the idea of these two interacting though #wip titles game #wimseyverse #the hour bbc #angst and literary allusions #freddie will of course struggle to assimilate the reality of lord peter as so many have done before him #hector knows he's unsettled by him and can't quite place why because he shouldn't be (he tells himself)

16 notes · View notes

notmoreflippingelves · 3 months

Note

OTP ask 😉 ! Krisnix: 10, 14, 30, 39, 42 ; Estelanor: 2, 5, 18, 30, 51 please?

So I ended up splitting this up into two different posts, because I ended up rambling a good bit. The Krisnix was already done. And I am putting the EoA OT3 beneath the read more.

(It is rather lengthy and I didn't want to scandalize the EoA fandom too much with my unhinged thoughts about a "problematic" OT3 ship that (probably) no one else has ever thought about before or since. So here goes...

Esteban/Elena/Victor

2. What would they do if the other woke in a manic state after a nightmare?

Of the three of them, Victor is the least likely to have "nightmares" in the traditional sense (i.e. one the evoke fear and/or anxiety), but it isn't too uncommon for him to have dreams that make him sad. Mainly dreaming about the happy days early in his marriage with Ash--when Carla was still small and they were a proper family. Or he'll dream about being cast out of Avalor with his family shortly after the invasion and being unable to return for over four decades. Or he'll dream of the other two during the Dark Times™ and wake up feeling melancholy that Elena was isolated in the amulet and Esteban under Shuriki's thumb for forty-one years. Victor can't help but feel a little guilty and sad that he wasn't there to keep the others safe or even just provide a little humor--and even guiltier when he remembers that he spent decades feeling jealous of Elena and resentful towards Esteban, so its unlikely that the selfish person that he was then would've done anything different if he'd had the chance.

Even though he is least likely to have nightmares himself, Victor is probably the best at calming either of the others down if they have nightmares. (He does after all have practice doing so with Carla). He will carefully stroke the hair off the sweaty brow(s) in question and quietly croon the same lullaby that he used to sing Carla to sleep with. He doesn't have Elena's vocal talents, but his singing voice is soft and gentle and the words of the song are reassuring. And it's usually only a matter of time before the others drift back off to sleep.

Unsurprisingly, Elena has nightmares A LOT. Most often, she dreams of her parents wrapped up in Shuriki's green smoke or the dark, cold silence of her amulet prison. But occasionally, other dreams creep in. Shuriki victorious and making Elena watch as every one of her family and friends are killed in front of her with her powerless to stop it. Orizaba blotting out the sun for good and all Avalor being trapped in the dark. Elena's emotion magic failing to revive Esteban after he teleported in front of Cahu's sand grain for her--even though she has forgiven him even if only in the dream.

She is also, however, pretty good at comforting the others when they have nightmares. Without fail, the first thing she will do is use the "glow" spell on the scepter to bring some light back into the room. (This is particularly effective when Esteban is the one who has had the bad dream, as he does not handle waking up in the dark and afraid very well). She speaks very calmly and very slowly--and asks first before offering consoling cuddles. (Again, Esteban does not always want to be touched depending on the dream he's had and what sort of mental place he's in after it). Sometimes, she will use her scepter again--specifically the "illusion" or "truesight" to bring a up a vision of something calming and comforting.

(It is worth nothing that I do headcanon Elena and Esteban have a bit of a strong psychic link due to their crystal well connection. So I think one or both might be able to "sense" the other having had a particularly bad dream. And on the nights where they are apart from each other, they will not let distance stop them from comforting each other. Elena can and will wake up one of the Guardians to fly her whenever Esteban is. Esteban will reach for his staff and teleport to Elena's side. And after they do this, they make a point to "check in" on Victor as well to see how he is doing/make sure he feels included).

Esteban, meanwhile, has the most frequent nightmares of the three. Shuriki and the Dark Times™ is naturally the most frequent source and subject of his dreams. Esteban is forced to recall the horrendous things that she did to Esteban's family, his country, and to Esteban himself. And more than that the things that she made him do that horrified and disgusted him and broke him in ways that he did not even know that he could be broken. It's almost a relief when he has a nightmare that does not concern Shuriki in some way and instead focuses on one of the other frightening times from his life--those times when he dreams of his parents ship going down, of Elena and Luisa disowning him, of Ash and Zopilote inevitably realizing that they could just kill him to drain Takaina's magic out of him and into themselves, of Cahu turning his abuelos to stone and Esteban not being able to teleport in front of Elena before the same fate befell her.

As he is usually the one (though not always the only one) who needs be comforted after a nightmare as opposed to doing the comforting, he has the least amount of practice at post-nightmare calming. Nevertheless, he has a few go-to strategies. He will usually teleport to the kitchen and back and come back with a jug of water, a few glasses, and some wash cloths on a tray. He will pour a some water into a cup and hand it over to the person(s) who had the nightmare(s). He'll also dampen the wash cloth with the cool water and then trace smooth, sinuous patterns with it across forehead(s) and the back of their neck(s). He'll also encourage the other(s) to count to ten and back with him, while also leading them into slow, deep relaxing breaths until they calm down.

5. Describe their cozy night in.

(I'm basing this primarily on the scenario of my w.i.p. where Esteban has moved out of the palace into a house of his own and most of the OT3 times happen at his new home--to avoid scandalizing the rest of the Flores family or putting Carla in a weird spot).

Victor cooks dinner for the other two, but Esteban retains custody and control of the pepper shaker so that Victor doesn't go overboard with the seasonings yet again. Elena is only allowed to help with gathering ingredients, chopping vegetables and setting the table, etc. because otherwise she is a kitchen disaster (also Esteban and Victor still feel a bit weird about ordering their queen around even if they know she's always happy to help.) After dinner, they sit around and have a quiet evening together. Victor has been promising for awhile to teach Elena how to play (i.e. cheat at) poker--much to Esteban's discomfort--and how to throw knives --much to Esteban's even greater discomfort, so they will often go into the other room and be chaotic, while Esteban works on paper work by the fire. (I tend to headcanon that post-canon redeemed Esteban either stays on as Naomi's assistant chancellor, takes over the bookkeeping and inventory for Luisa's chocolate shop, or does both--so either way there is always a lot of paperwork for him to do. ) When they're each done for the night with their little side projects, Esteban, Victor, and Elena regroup. Usually, there will be guitar playing (Esteban and Elena canonically play, and Victor probably knows how to as well) and singing and/or dancing. Other times, one of them (usually Esteban) will read aloud to the others from the latest popular novel.

When they start to get tired (but not too tired...if you catch my drift), they make their way into the massive bed in the bedroom and... [redacted].

18. How likely are they to have fur babies? How many and what kind?

I am assuming that "fur babies" refers to pets and not like an omegaverse situation, lol. This is actually an interesting thought as like...I'm not even 100% sure that cats and dogs exist in Avalor. I'm pretty sure they do given that there are some in Sofia the First and the little dog sculptures that come to life in the Valentina episode. But like...apparently, jaguars are extinct in the Sofia-verse, according to sunbird oracle and I don't think we see regular cats or dogs again at any other point, unless I am forgetting something. So like...it's possible that they don't????

But I'm just going to assume that cats and dogs do exist even if we don't see them.

Something about Esteban just screams "has allergies" to me, but I'm not sure I can put my finger on what exactly. Other than just me projecting onto him even more than I already do. But even if he does have allergies, it's very possible that the crystal well cured him of this, so that he can enjoy the furry darlings in peace.

I would say that Victor has dog energy, Esteban has cat energy (if he's only just now gotten over his allergies), and Elena has both. Assuming the royal household doesn't already have cats and dogs, they will probably soon acquire some for maximum cuddles.

I would like to think that Victor and Carla will get a dog at some point. It was a probably a tough and resilient stray from the wrong side of the tracks--not unlike the Delgados themselves. Victor probably wasn't too sure about it at first, but honestly, he can never say no to Carla and it's not exactly an unpleasant thing to agree to. There will inevitably be puppies at some point, because the thought never occurred to Victor to get the dog neutered once they agreed to take it in (And if the thought did occur to him, he probably would've resisted anyway because "why should we deprive the dog of one of life's greatest joys.") Victor and Carla will probably keep one of the puppies, and Elena who fell in love with the puppers at first sight will probably keep at least one more for herself (and the rest of the royal family)--and they'll make sure that the others go to good families.

Another thought that I had is that perhaps Elena uncovered an illegal magical animal trafficking ring in Avalor and put a stop to it. And maybe one of the animals that they discovered was a jaquin--specifically one that has been raised in captivity and/or had its wings or claws damaged in some way. They probably originally intended to return it to Vallestrella to live with the other jaquins, but it was eventually determined that due to its special circumstances, the poor thing might not survive out there on its own (even if under the protection of the other jaquins), so it actually makes more sense for it to live in the royal palace. Elena takes excellent care of her new "pet that isn't exactly a pet" and makes sure that it can socialize with Skylar and the other Guardians--as well as with the royal family and friends.

30. Your OTP gets to pick out each other’s outfits; what is each wearing?

Victor and Elena are both very into Esteban's little adventure outfit (God, they're so me-) --with the three whole buttons undone on his shirt, no jacket or cravat, the scarf belt wrapped around his waist and those sinfully tight trousers. So, the two of them (ganging up on Esteban as a group as they often do) are often able to persuade him into their outfit of choice. And unless there is a particular reason for Esteban to dress more formally, he can usually be persuaded. It's nice that he's able to dress more casually now than before, and he knows how good this looks on him.

(On a related note, Victor absolutely *hates* Esteban's yellow jacket that he wears for formal court functions. And so he does have a long-standing fantasy of asking Esteban to wear it to bed one of these nights so that Victor and Elena can literally rip it off him and tear the hated thing to shreds. But Victor hasn't acted on this impulse. Yet.)

Victor is also very into Elena's little adventure outfit with the tunic and ye olde skinny jeans. This is slightly for thirsty reasons. (He doesn't really get to admire her very nice legs when they're hidden beneath her skirts, but he can when she wears trousers.) But he is also aware that Elena is more comfortable in this kind of outfit than in her more usual "queenly" attire. Also a more casual look suits her very impulsive, headstrong and easily-distracted personality. Far easier for her to climb a tree on a whim this way. And Victor loves seeing Elena at her most "Elena," and she's very comfortable in her skin in this outfit . (Victor has not yet had the privilege of seeing Elena in her skintight fencing gear yet, or he would have a new favorite. And this would be entirely for the thirsty reasons. No one could ever say Victor Delgado is a saint. Not even close.)

Esteban, meanwhile, likes seeing Elena dressed like the queen that she is. The finest of gowns, the most extravagant of jewels. All should see her and be instantly struck by her beauty, her radiance, her goodness, her majesty in any and every sense of the word. Every Avaloran citizen's heart should swell with awe and pride as they clasp eyes yet again on the greatest queen in all the Ever Realm. Of Elena's canon outfits, I would say that Esteban's favorite is probably the red ballgown that she wears for official court functions throughout the show (and the one that her face character wears in the Disney parks). Red is after all, Elena's signature color--just as it is Esteban's own--and it is a very flattering one on her indeed. He would probably try to get Elena to accessorize the dress a bit more than she usually does. (A necklace that matches her crown, a jeweled broach at the center of her belt, rings on every finger, etc) though I can't say that he would be super successful.

Victor's only has two canon outfits and neither of them are particularly great. (The Dracula-core malvago cape is certainly memorable but not particularly flattering or the kind of thing that Esteban or Elena would care to see him again). So I am going to let Esteban and Elena find something new and better for him. Victor won't mind. He's always liked the finer things (too much for his own good), and he's delighted to be the "sugar. baby" for two royals who have very refined and expensive taste (Esteban) and love to spoil their loved ones (Elena).

Essentially, I think they would look for a more flattering and more upscale version of his "regular" canon outfit. Shirt with waistcoat, trousers and cravat. Elena and Esteban will make sure that Victor has his share of jackets too, but unless there's a particular reason why Victor needs to wear one (weather or a formal occasion), I think they'd prefer he go sans jacket with just the shirt and waistcoat. Victor is rather broad-shouldered and from the little we can see through his jacket, he seems to have some nice biceps on him too, so it would be nice to have something that will show off his arms a little better.

Based on my initial impression, green ( to match his eyes) and black would probably be the most flattering colors for Victor. And given that we see him wear these colors in his "regular" outfit, we can presume that Victor likes them reasonably well. So I think Esteban and Elena would probably focus on a lot on these shades when adding new pieces to their novio's wardrobe.

I think that they would particularly look for a patterned waistcoat, like the kind we often see in the Georgian and Victorian time periods (or even like Julio Guzman's Magister of Trade vest on the show itself). Nothing too over-the-top mind, but given that Victor is a rather flamboyant person in general, I think he deserves something a little flashier and more ornate now that he can. Preferably ones in green, black, or both is kind of the vibe I think they should strive for. A few examples below:

I also think Victor is confident enough to pull off a black blouse with his waistcoat. He's a retired thief and an ex-malvago, so he definitely has more-than-a-bit of a "bad boy" edge to him and that would be reflected in his wardrobe. I also think Elena and Esteban would probably find that very attractive (even if Esteban would never admit it). So they make sure that he has a black shirt or two in addition to the basic whites. And neither of them complains too much if Victor desides to forgo the cravat entirely and leave the top few buttons his black blouse undone beneath his waistcoat.

51. What’s a non verbal way they say I love you?

Well, Elena canonically has her emotion magic, so literally all she would need to do is *feel* a profound sense of love for either of the others and her dress would turn pink and they would all know what was meant. That being said, she is very open and affectionate in general, so she is constantly telling the others verbally or through little gestures how much she cares about them. I feel like physical touch is her primary love language considering how physically affectionate we see her with her family and friends throughout the show. So, she is constantly reaching for the others' hands, kissing their cheeks, placing a hand on their shoulders, booping noses, etc. Victor naturally responds to this right away as he also a very physically affectionate person. It takes a bit more getting used from Esteban (even platonically, it was a lot), because he's naturally more reserved and because he's profoundly touch-starved (to the point of being overwhelmed when he first started getting more physical contact from people he likes). But now he thrives on it.

Victor shows his affection for the others in a lot of a different ways, most of them somewhat casual. He uses pet names for the others a lot. (Esteban has gone from "El Segundo" (derogatory) to "mi/nuestro El Segundo" (affectionate) to Victor. Meanwhile, Victor calls Elena "mi reina" ("my queen") and "jaquinita" ("little (female) jaquin")--which is just so cute I could scream.

Additionally, cooking with or for the people he cares about (see also: Carla) has always been a big thing with Victor. So he would constantly be doing things like trying to learn how to make various foreign dishes (ex: ramen or sushi from Satu, souvlaki from Corinthia) that the other mentioned trying/enjoying on foreign diplomatic visits. Or making (over-peppered but otherwise very tasty) soup whenever the others are feeling sick.

He also spends a good bit of time trying to make the others laugh--especially Esteban because his laughter is so comparatively rare (and therefore so much more precious). Cue Victor telling the worst fucking jokes you've ever heard to try to get the others to chuckle. (Elena thinks Victor is genuinely hilarious because her sense of humor is just as bad). He also is known to play particularly imaginative pranks (including ones on himself) to try and get the others' attention. Esteban is frequently just rolling his eyes at Victor, but there is a very amused twinkle in them when he does so.

Esteban's love language is a combination of acts of service, little gifts, words of affirmation, and physical touch that is perhaps best described as noticing and remembering things. This is partly due to the fact that "noticing and remembering" everything was quite literally his job as chancellor for over four decades. But another major factor is that Esteban spent most of his childhood wanting and waiting to be noticed and remembered himself, so he's especially sensitive to wanting to make sure that his partners feel seen and valued.

He never needs to be reminded about birthdays, anniversaries, holidays coming up. He is always on top of things and has been making careful plans for weeks (if not months). He will, however, very carefully and gently remind the others about the upcoming important date if he fears that they have forgotten. (They often need the reminder. Elena in particular).

And not even just the "big" things. He'll remember a book that Victor casually mentioned and then go search for it so that he can read it too and discuss it with him. He'll remember that Elena can sometimes get anxious whenever she has to make a big speech in front of crowds, so he adds a little note to the top of her scroll that says something like "You've got this, prima. It is a wonderful speech, and I know you will deliver it well. But even if by some bizarre chance it does not go well, I am still extremely proud of you and grow prouder every day." And of course, this is just the little pep talk Elena needs.

He notices Victor moving his head more carefully and rubbing his neck. Cue Esteban drawing him a warm bath and offering to massage Victor's tired back and shoulders until he feels better. He's not *consciously* tracking Elena's "courses," (that would be a bit too creepy and invasive for them both), but he is nevertheless mindful of the subtle changes in Elena's mood and health as any given month goes on. So he is nevertheless ready with a box of Abuela's chocolate, ye olde warming pad, and ye olde ibuprofen before Elena even asks for it.

Basically, Esteban is just always paying attention and always looking for a million quiet little ways that he can make his dos queridos ( and all of the rest of his family and friends to be fair) feel cherished and noticed in every way.

#vicestebalena #my beloveds #elena of avalor #victor delgado #esteban flores #elena castillo flores #i was trouble finding the exact waistcoats i was imagining in green so i had to recolor the first two ( from original blue) in photoshop #which is why they look slightly off but i hope you see and understand my vision #most of the roccoco/regency/victorian waistcoats i could find in green were either solids or too “light” a color than would suit victor #victor can be a little fancy boy as a treat but he shouldn't ever be a complete fop (that's esteban's job)#elena and victor have very similar senses of humor imo. as in terrible #do i have much canon evidence for this? not really apart from elena's bad jokes and how cringefail (affectionate) 'don't look now' is #but i know it in my heart to be true #victor's sense of humor is a bit more l.e.w.d and elena is a bit more likely to over-explain a terrible pun #but overall they have super similar vibes and they crack each other up while esteban rolls his eyes and suffers in the background #ironically victor is probably the most grounded and emotionally mature in this relationship for the most part...#but he has the sense of humor of a 12 year old who just discovered innuendoes for the first time #additionally victor doesn't do any knife throwing in canon but i just...I know in my heart he can and that he's really good at it #i mean he was a thief on the run for over 40 years without magic; he had to have learned how to defend himself #this trio is everything to me tbh #and to think this all started b/c i thought estevictor would be h.o.t and then discovered estebalena not long afterwards #and then accidentally put a brief vicelena moment in the estebalena i was working on #and then my third eye was opened and i realized i could in fact have them all at once and that it would be so so good #i just think after all esteban has been through he deserves to be smothered in affection and attention and validation #and the others are happy to deliver and to receive the love that esteban is so desperate to give in return #ask memes

4 notes · View notes