#why do they both have depression... literally me this is when i wrote that scene for me and AFC's dead story about running away

[johaerys-writes]

Can I ask you about the scene with Priam?

Before this Achilles is not “sleeping,” bathing, eating, or drinking as part of his mourning process. We see him holding Patroclus’ body, a no-no as the body is “unclean.” (Also, he shaves his head, rolls in dirt, passes out in dirt, etc.) I have seen some takes about how this is part of Achilles’ mourning process for both Pat and himself and how this is him sort of losing the rest of his humanity. Then just-just prior to the Priam scene, Thetis goes to Achilles to tell him to give Priam Hector’s body. Achilles just gives in without any resistance. This is around line 130. She’s like, ‘baby you got to move on from this. Go have something to eat and fuck a woman’ (some of the phrasing here is curious, but it’s not exactly the focus of my question). I always thought this quick acceptance to see Priam was a sign of his deep depression and resignation to his fate.

But then in the scene with Priam he plays proper host. He’s eating and drinking. Then he (debatable imo) goes off to fuck Briseis. It’s like he is literally doing what his mother told him to do. So why the switch from rejecting human customs and needs to engaging in “normal” behavior? As you mentioned, these old stories function differently and don’t exactly have characters arcs with lessons learned. So like wtf is going on? What are we supposed to do with this information?

No disrespect here, but sometimes I think these reversal scenes (which happen multiple times) are just one of Homer’s co-authors/editors going off and doing their own thing and there’s really no hidden meaning at all.

Okay so first of all, I think the notion of Homer's "editors" tampering with the text is a fairly popular one in some circles, I have heard a few different versions of it and I'm not sure I agree or disagree. Most classicists whose work I've read so far, and who work predominantly with Homer, tend to take the Iliad and Odyssey at face value and to automatically assume that the works are the way Homer/whoever wrote them intended them to be. And this is the way I myself engage with the Homeric works, because I think once you go "oh that part here is nonsense, it has probably been changed by those nebulous editors" then you're so much more likely to pick and choose what you like and draw your own conclusions and I don’t think that's fair to the work and the extensive body of work dealing with that work. Ykwim? So let's just say that the Iliad as a whole, and the part you highlighted in particular, are in the fact the way the original epic is meant to be.

The last few books of the Iliad, in my opinion, are the breakdown of Achilles' character. In the beginning, despite his anger and resentment towards Agamemnon, we still see him put together and civil with everyone during the embassy scene, and then again when he speaks with Patroclus, arms him and sends him forth to fight. Then, after Patroclus dies, he loses the plot and goes on his rampage, where his grace, respect and courtesy even towards his enemies fly right out the window. Even after he kills Hector and drags him around, he finds no peace. He refuses to eat, drink or bathe and still yearns and cries for Patroclus. But then, after he sees Patroclus' shade at the beach, is where the second most important change comes about if you ask me; this is when Achilles seems to wholeheartedly accept his death. We have Patroclus' funeral, then the funeral games, where Achilles seems to once again find his nobility and grace, as well as showcase how adept he is at diplomacy and handling the other warchiefs' pettiness and arrogance. Even with Agamemnon he is generous and polite, not exhibiting any resentment towards him.

But there's something different about that scene compared to all the others imo: there is not much of the energy, fire and determination we would see earlier, even when he was grieving. He gives away so much of his treasure too; my friend Baejax and I have often talked about this scene and how it feels like Achilles is giving away his wealth because he has no need for it, since he'll be dying soon anyway. This is a man that has fully accepted that hard behind glory rides death, and that it will be coming swiftly for him.

And this is how I've always seen the meeting with Priam, tbh. For me personally, that scene has always been about grief, mortality and the cost of glory (which is the most important commodity in the Iliad universe) and a meditation on the suffering which unites mankind. Achilles talks about his homeland and the father he has left behind whom he will never again see, about the pain he has caused Priam and his people, about the gods and the ultimate lack of choice that humans have. Men must suffer, he says, and must make others suffer in a world without justice.

So for me it isn’t so much Achilles embracing again the human customs he had rejected, but instead fully acknowledging the reality of his position and resigning himself to it. I don't think that Achilles "plays" the host, so much as he extends his hospitality to Priam (which, again, very important ideal in the Iliad, it's where the Trojan war started in a way. With Paris violating the Achaean's hospitality and stealing Helen), acknowledges Priam's suffering, and acknowledges how instrumental he has been in said suffering. In that scene, killer and victim become one, and with the insight into each other’s condition comes compassion. And I think that's a powerful statement, and perhaps the most enduring in the Iliad. Soon after that, the Trojans bury Hector, which foreshadows and mirrors' Achilles' funeral as well. This "double funeral" completes the Iliad, and its overarching tragedy.

Now. The thing is that Achilles is a really divisive personality to begin with, and the scene with Priam even more so. He isn’t easy to categorise or analyse, and depending on the lens through which one sees his actions and behaviours, the interpretation could change greatly. Rachel Bespaloff in her commentary On the Iliad (which I absolutely loathe and want to tear in little pieces and burn LOL) says that "to rid himself of troublesome responsibility Achilles ducks behind fatality" during the Priam scene, and that his words to the old king are "scandalous behaviour". If you ask me, this take completely ignores Achilles' own suffering and rejects his role in the Iliad as the idealistic, honourable and rigid in his honour and beliefs young hero who almost completely loses his humanity BECAUSE of the ugliness and pettiness of war, because of that suffering, because of his own grief, because of injustice, because of bad leadership, because violence simply begets violence. And it also completely ignores the larger and overarching idea in the Iliad that death and glory, suffering and good fortune go hand in hand. And that this doesn't only apply to good and noble Priam and Hector, but also (you guessed it) to Achilles, in this final scene which is a moment of shared humanity between "enemies" and one of the most poignant in the epic.

Anyway. To conclude this tangent, no, I do not believe that Achilles simply does what his momma tells him to do, nor does he wine and dine Priam for the hell of it. I believe that this is the most depressed, resigned and desolate we see Achilles in the entire poem, a man simply awaiting his death with nothing really to look forward to in life, but who still retains his humanity and treats the people around him with the dignity and respect they deserve.

I hope this answered your question!

#achilles #the iliad #Homer's iliad #listen i just want to chase takes like bespaloff's with a baseball bat until they stop existing #no book has ever managed to raise my blood pressure but this managed it beautifully #thank god a lot of analyses I read these days seem to directly oppose it #anyway it's super fucking late and i'm barely coherent i should go to bed #patrochilles #Patroclus #priam

[heckyeahponyscans]

In my search for info about the Oldsmobile ad campaign, I came across this blog post:

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The story of “not your father’s Oldsmobile.” Or how some really bad advertising changed the culture forever!

October 14, 2008

Time for a story boys and girls. It’s a tale that requires we go back 20 years, before copywriters had Macs, before email, before I lost my hair. This story harkens back to a day when Oldsmobiles roamed the earth. And their commercials filled the airwaves. I should know; I made some of them. Including the campaign that served as Olds’ final and famous (infamous?) death gasp: “Not Your Father’s Oldsmobile.”

 Dad’s was better.

The line has become a pop culture catch phrase, in the same ilk –albeit attached to worse advertising-as “Got Milk?”  Both slogans have been co-opted literally hundreds of times, far outlasting their original intent. Try reading your morning paper and not finding a variation on either line. For example, about a candidate: “This is not your father’s Democrat.”  About a technological innovation: “This is not your mother’s sewing machine.” And so on. Sadly enough, more Americans are familiar with the Olds’ slogan than of Shakespeare’s finest sonnets. Way more.

A soft-spoken creative director by the name of Joel Machak wrote that famous line. I actually came up with the campaign’s tag: “The New Generation of Olds.” Both pieces were intended as lyrics. That’s right, a jingle! As a matter of fact, I was brought in to help Joel come up with the refrain. The piece went together as follows (sing along):

       This is not your father’s Oldsmobile…This is the new generation of Olds.

Pretty spiffy, eh? The word “generation” was key. If you recall, each commercial featured a celebrity and one of his or her offspring. This is why the campaign is so damn silly. Outside of a morbid fascination with ogling Ringo Starr’s purple-haired daughter or Dave Brubeck’s motley looking brothers, placing the kin of “B” and “C” celebrities on camera was pure folly. Though I will concede we anticipated Reality TV by 10 years! If you do nothing else today, go to the above link. Trust me.

Where’s my Cutlass Supreme?

The very first spot was for the “totally redesigned Cutlass Supreme.” The protagonist for this commercial was none other than William Shatner, appearing as; you guessed it, Captain Kirk! Riding shotgun was his lovely college-aged daughter, Melanie Shatner. A middling actress, she was pretty darn cute. She also was well endowed. And this became problematic given her wardrobe and where we were shooting. It gets damn cold in the Palm Desert at night. The diaphanous gown provided Melanie was meant to be futuristic a la Star Trek, but it did nothing to warm her up. Subsequently, her nipples went completely rigid, sticking up like Spock’s ears.

beam me up, Scotty!

While this may sound lurid and comical now, at the time (3 AM) it was a “situation.” Imagine the middle-aged suit from GM, replete in a satin Oldsmobile Racing Team jacket, making his way over to the director. “Excuse me, but we can see her nipples!”  Given we’d already shot scenes of Melanie in the gown, a wardrobe change was not possible. The solution? Duct tape. And thus her cleavage had a silver lining.

The other moment I’ll never forget was a captured piece of dialogue (unscripted) between William and his daughter. Between takes, they were side by side in the white Cutlass. Unbeknown to either, the mic was still on. Listening to Captain Kirk school his daughter about the virtues of pep and sleeping pills as a key to nighttime shooting was priceless. What a Dad. What a cad. In a way, it preceded his Emmy-winning turn as Danny Crane by some 20 years.

I know this is trifling gossip, and long past its vintage. But like everyone else, I’m beaten down from our grim economy and an evermore-depressing election. Not to mention the woes of Chicago’s sports franchises… When I was new I used to love listening to the old-timers tell bawdy stories from their shoots. Now that I have a few under my belt, I figured we could all use a respite.

----

As a post-script: in 2021 the writer returned to his blog after fifteen years away. He explained that he had dropped out of the advertising biz and become a substance abuse counselor. He began work just as Covid broke out. Wow! I find that inspiring! He also has a Youtube channel devoted to his aquarium hobby, check it out here!

#Oldsmobile #advertising #William Shatner #I love little stories like this

[libra-stellium]

*currently reading Venus & Jupiter - Erin Sullivan*

She mentions the relationship between creativity and pregnancy when talking about the origin of the myths about Venus:

“There are many times when we feel full of ourselves and complete, as if we are ready for something new, a new creation, but it’s very uncomfortable, for it simply isn’t happening. It’s often at this time we are most uncomfortable with our sense of completeness, that we are, in fact, most aware of our need for a new experience, and something does actually get born out of that sense of fullness …. Often creation is preceded by depression.”

I’m having so many thoughts about this! This makes sense why spiritually we see indications of pregnancy and birth as new opportunities and new cycles. Especially if you’re not pregnant and you have a dream about it! Also shows how the process of creating is usually uncomfortable. Some people spend months on one painting! The learning process is also uncomfortable bc of how many times you have to try before you finally get a technique. Singers taking classes to learn new techniques go through the same!

I can also see the correlation between giving birth and feeling like you HAVE to get a thought or a feeling out creatively and it just consumes you and you can’t think about anything else the same way it feels during contractions like this baby needs to be out NOW!!

The sentence that creation is often preceded by depression is really hitting for me bc I was telling someone this over the weekend!! When my narc mom moved closer and I was now dealing with her antics almost 24/7 I was literally depressed and I couldn’t do the creative things that I would usually be doing. After going no contact with her it felt like I needed to scream or something 😂 Mentally it feels like my brain is able to come up with creative solutions to any problems I have and I've done so many creative things since!

She also wrote that “there was a time when there was no concept of paternity” so I had to look up when it was introduced and I could not find anything lol there’s just so much about paternity law 💀 but anywayyyyy the way I understand it is that before the concept of paternity the whole pregnancy process was only Venus focused in the sense that the focus was on the beauty of the process bc there were no expectations in the outcome. (I’m a lawyer) To me paternity is about ownership and responsibility like is that child yours? Are you claiming them legally? I feel like the introduction of paternity adds more pressure and more focus onto the outcome bc it depends on it. If there is no baby at the end there is no paternity you know?? But the outcome of no baby doesn’t erase the pregnancy/process that a woman just went through.

I can see how this relates to creativity bc when you’re in the creative process just to be in it you’ll be satisfied with whatever the outcome is but when you have rules (personal or institutional) about what a satisfactory outcome is the creative process is not the same bc now you depend on that specific outcome to feel satisfied Lmfao idk if that makes sense but it does in my head!

And I can’t think of processes without thinking of saturn! It makes sense to me that saturn is exalted in a Venus sign (libra) bc they’re both about the process and journey and less about the outcome. When I think of Venus and Libra I think about beautifying things and people like the makeover scene in a movie lol everything has the potential if they go through the process and sometimes that’s the most satisfying part! A lot of times when you’ve been in the process for a long time and you get to the outcome you’re like alright! Cool!…….now what 😅 lmao

Also back to the paternity thing, there's no "paternity" in the rulership book but father is ruled by the sun and saturn and this may be a reach but stay with me lol I feel like viewing the father in a saturn way would be about the one that took on the role during the pregnancy instead of their role starting after birth and viewing the father like the sun would be about when birth happens and the dad doesn't drop the baby and people act like he just achieved the unimaginable and mom is just there like where's my praise??? Bc saturn is in detriment in leo and bc sun is in its fall in libra it's like the process has a hard time getting the proper recognition compared to the outcome you know??

Thank you for reading if you made it this far lol

#astrology #astro #astro tumblr #learn astrology #astro community #venus #jupiter #libra #saturn #leo #sun #erin sullivan

[merevide]

Why Max Shouldn’t Have Died This Season (And Why Her Living Has More Impact)

(TW: mentions of suicide and depression)

I have been seeing a decent number of people saying Max should’ve died this season because it would’ve “been more heartbreaking” and “more impactful” and that’s simply not true.

Well, the fact that her dying would be a good decision isn’t true, of course it would be heartbreaking. We love Max here.

Stranger Things is a show that has had the reoccurring “introduce new & likable character -> kill them off at the end of the season”  staple for a while now, and yeah, it’s getting repetitive since you can basically pinpoint who’s gonna die, but killing a main like Max wouldn’t be a better option

Max’s arc this season was her closing herself off to others in response to s3’s end where Billy died, sacrificing himself to the Mind Flayer. At first she blames herself for not doing something to save him, but it’s later revealed that deep down, she wanted something bad to happen to him in response to the abuse and pain he put her through. So when she got that through Billy dying in s3, she has tried to forgive herself, but just can’t, which is the exact thing Vecna feeds on. Vecna feeds on victims of pain and suffering due to their internal guilt being something he can easily manipulate and feed on, like a parasite.

But that’s the latter half of the season, the actual turning stone in Max’s arc is when Vecna first tries to take her in Volume 1, but through having her favorite song played, she escapes. That’s not what technically saves her though, it’s the memories of her loved ones that do.

Reading the scene as an allegory of Max literally choosing life over death, choosing her loved ones over the pain and suffering that’s been haunting her basically makes any chance of death after that completely void.

Having her die after having her choose to live would basically be saying “Yeah Depression/Mental Illness eventually overtakes you and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.” and that’s just so wrong and would basically have the whole thing be tragedy for the sake of tragedy.

The entire scene of having Max confess that she’s been battling with the pain of wanting to be “taken away” and to “disappear” just reads like having suicidal thoughts and thinking you don’t deserve to live, which just isn’t true at all.

Even Max’s line as she’s dying in Lucas’ arms is literally “Lucas I'm scared, I'm so scared, I'm so scared. I don't wanna die. I'm not ready!” Which is heart shattering, usually we don’t get stuff like that in this show, I also think it contrasts to how Eddie accepts his death in the scene before. Realizing once again that she still has so much to live for and how death isn’t the answer. Which is also why I don’t get people saying her dying permanently would be more impactful, both Lucas and Max pleading is more impactful to me then actually having Max kick the bucket and having it all be for nothing, having the light at the end of the tunnel suddenly snuff out.

Even El restarting her heart plays into this, obviously it’s to set up s5 and how Max’s coma will play into it, but El using her powers to restart Max’s heart also comes with a montage of all the good times El has shared with Max. Max has an impact on El, like she has an impact on Lucas, on her whole friend group. Small but powerful moments in the gist of it, moments that not only meant the world to Max but to her friends as well.

(Also “Running Up That Hill (A Deal with God)” by Kate Bush being her favorite song also has meaning but this is getting long so i’ll chalk it up to which way you interpret the lyrics)

So, those are my thoughts. Obviously Max is in a coma currently but the Duffers have said it’ll be important to s5 so besides all of that i just wrote above, having Max be alive is important to the plot, so yay for writing tools.

Max is a great character and I’m glad she got more time to shine this season and have a well written arc. Again this is just my opinion, we’re allowed to disagree, it’s what makes discussion fun. Possibly tell me your thoughts?

#i could be reading way too much into this who knows it’s my brand atp #also side note max is NOT better off dead than her being disabled. don’t say that. it’s ableist. #now we got that out of the way i like writing things like this #as someone who’s currently struggling with their mental health Max this season helped me in so many ways and that Kate Bush scene gave me #chills and brought tears to my eyes. #anyway fuck vecna we all hate him hope El kills him fr in s5 #stranger things #stranger things s4 #max mayfield #maxine mayfield #eleven #el hopper #lucas sinclair #lumax #elmax #my text #suicide tw #depression tw

[smooth-boob]

⭐

You are a true friend lol, thank you for sending this, and I AM SORRY FOR THE LONG RAMBLE, BUT HERE WE GO:

With absolute writer's ego, I have been vibrating with director commentary about The Bustle in a House since I wrote it because some of the lines are quietly devastating and they inform so much of what I have written since then. Specifically, you may be pleased to hear, I keep coming back to lines about Anthony's relationship with Violet.

First, there's this in chapter two:

For a moment, they are like mother and son again, rather than strangers trapped in an impossible situation and drowning in their own grief. Dread rises within him as he watches another wave overtake her. He is grasping her hand, trying to keep his mother from slipping away again, but he is not strong enough, and it is already too late.

Then later, in the next chapter:

Absorbed in their various activities, his family do not take notice of him immediately. 

Folding his hands behind himself, he first bids his mother good morning. She raises her gaze and bids him the same. Without heart, he cannot help but feel. Offering her the benefit of generous thoughts, he is glad that she does see him and that his appearance has not offended her.

(emphasis added obviously lol)

"Offering her...offended her." = he is literally just like, "Wow, she barely acknowledged me and didn't get mad that I existed. That's really kinda nice!"

This entire story is filled with an extremely lonely Anthony noting that his family ignores him/doesn't see him/doesn't like him/doesn't care about him and it is all simultaneously tangled up with him making quick excuses as to why this is happening or how he's trying to compensate for it. Sometimes, you almost can't distinguish the distinct parts of what he's thinking. He is continuously pushing them away because he doesn't know how to pull them closer without hurting them as much as he is hurting, and so they stop seeing him as Anthony and start seeing him as something else. The "tyrant brother." The shadow of a father. Whatever. All of his siblings are literal children for whom he is responsible, so he can't ask much of them, especially when nobody likes that he's not just their big brother anymore.

Meanwhile, he wants so much to have his mom back, but of course she is understandably deeply depressed and also she resents him for taking his father's place (even though it's literally not his choice!) and when she is there with him/for him, she's still not really there.

In that scene in chapter two, Anthony's pretty sick, and when Violet finally comes to check on him (he sounds like he's choking to death, and she happens to be in the hallway) she breaks down pretty much at the sight of Anthony being ill (which, y'know, she just lost her husband and almost lost her baby, so yeah) and he gets about thirty seconds of comfort, followed by him trying desperately to comfort her because she cannot handle the situation at all. And then like a week later, when he finally is well and he wakes up SO FULL OF HOPE and ready to join his family again, instead of her being glad that her son is well, it is like she is looking straight through him.

But he can't resent her. He doesn't want to. She's his mom, she raised him so lovingly, and then she just...suddenly hates him. And now he is her guardian, and he feels so much responsibility for her well-being and so much guilt for not being who she wants him to be, even though he can't be that person, which is something only time will teach him.

In Bustle, I would say there are no villains. In For Shame, well...I cared less about not making any villains lol. I can understand Violet's perspective in both stories, but in For Shame, so much time has passed and yet it all comes back to the baggage of those initial moments after Edmund dies, and Anthony definitely reverts back to being eighteen/nineteen. He doesn't want his mom to see him break, and she is there for him, but it's too late, and he's slipping away again.

....end scene.

#for shame tag #bustle tag #bridgerton ramblings #.braindump #andthebubbles #writing tag #*edited

[homoerotic-shonen-rival-showdown]

while the soukoku+lumity voltron moment vs sasunaru polls is getting set on fire (rip my notifs again) let's engage in a light infodump about the guys in my pfp

these guys. my sillies. yes the guy on the left was in my nepotism contestant pair this is his other homoerotic shonen rivalry. he's got 2

^ fun fact this is apparently the earliest shaman king screenshot I have, dating to 1-2 days after I started watching it. fun goose archaeology fact for ya ^

they're so amazing I love them so much. but they don't really count as a rivalry (especially compared to hororen) because the animosity is entirely one sided and also slows down real fast. ren starts out being the most 13 year old ever, which is to say angsty and murderous, but he chills out with the murderous part really fast and their dynamic just becomes this

it's like sir you are aware you've committed yourself to a lifelong rivalry with the most chill person on the planet right? right?

he's so dramatic about it too this is a real line from when they fought each other in the plot tournament once

and then yoh just does this whenever he's asked to make important plot decisions

they both think the other person is The Coolest Guy Ever except it manifests quite differently between them

the one time ren dies before death loses all meaning yoh, because he's the best, immediately drops out of the plot tournament he's wanted to be in since he was 4 to get an 11 year old cult leader to resurrect him (keep up people) and it's very wholesome in a depressing kinda way. he would do that for most people but it's especially funny because of how pissed ren gets about his no-homo destined rival giving up his dreams to raise him from the dead without his consent

they're just so silly the dynamic of incredible mutual trust with this one sided insane rivalry is so fun and I love them so much

also this scene exists? I literally do not know why Takei wrote it like this but he did and it's real? here you go?

I totally would've put them on the bracket if it wasn't for the mutual, more dramatic homoerotic rivalry happening literally a meter to the left but they get to be the pfp because I singlehandedly blame that screenshot for turning me into what I am today. like I saw that scene 2 years ago and it altered my brain chemistry like "oh it's one of These"

anyways love them so so much

this has been your regularly scheduled shaman king infodump moment

#not polls #shaman king containment tag #before the hororen brainrot gripped me tight and dragged me into perdition they were my favourite guys #now I don't even have favourite guys it's just divided into aksjdhfjks <3 guys meh guys and TAKEI NO guys #I love these little infodump posts because I COULD make them on main where I have a lot of shaman king followers #but if I make them HERE no one knows what an asakura hao lego shoe is and I get to look smart #also shoutout to the one person who followed my main from here we love you #fun fact all the screenshots for this are ones I've just had? for years? #just because?

[khaleesiofalicante]

So I was interested in how you wrote/portrayed Max's mental transition in the last chapter. In the beginning he shows signs of dissociation from the present. But when he saw what happened to David and especially Lance, did he go into shock? Which made him catatonic? He was not responsive to the surroundings and people (even when/if his children were talking to him and Magnus literally being his roommate). I'd like to know how you broke down Max's transition. It was amazing to read it.

Thank you so much.

It was very tricky to write. Even though Max doesn't have major depression (like Magnus did in TLND) and he didn't see it coming, I spent a lot of time thinking about how he would navigate it.

Throughout the story, we see Max alienating himself (mostly from David) as a form of punishment when he feels like he has done something wrong. We also see that Max is someone who is extremely active - physically and emotionally. Something that helped to write his transition, especially going into that terrifying catatonic episode, was to focus on both. Think of it as the extreme forms of his two coping mechanisms. He not only alienated himself, but he removed himself from reality. In terms of his energy and movements, he moved to the other end of the spectrum and went catatonic.

It was very important for me to emphasize that what happened to David/Lance is NOT what started Max's depressive episode. As you noticed, he was unwell since the night Mallory died and that is important to me too because it is a true testament to his character. But Max going into depression is not because of David. It's because of him. The way he feels responsible for people, and the way he cares so bloody much, and it doesn't matter if it was Mallory or David, but the fact that he hurt someone, starts to alter his reality and affect his mental health. (we also see this multiple times whenever Max starts to get anxious/sad when someone gets hurt in his line of work).

As for when he finds out about David/Lance, it was definitely a trigger. I don't think he went into shock per se. But it was more of a slow descent into his severe episode, where he let go little by little. Hence, why it felt like he was watching a horror movie that was getting worse with time. I think Max, until that scene, was doing his best to hold on. But understanding what happened to his family made him let go of that last bit of strength and hope he was holding onto at the time. Because it's sort of a horrifying realization that it was all for nothing. Mallory died. David doesn't love him. Lance got hurt. They're never moving to D.C. I think it was one too many realities for him to accept.

A lot of big feelings. A lot of complicated feelings too.

#IALS

[confessmau]

Hello, yes, this is the same person who wrote that immense analysis of Derek yesterday and I've returned with more of my thoughts on him.

(This was a topic I randomly sprung up on Discord in a close friends server)

Honestly, Derek's anger issues resonated with me. I definitely do not grow as pissed as he frequently would, but, the mood swings. One wrong step and his mood shifts, he's completely distraught and unable to deal with everybody on a personal level. Because why would that matter anymore? His goals and frustrations are the only push and he sticks with those until relief hits(aka anybody that disagrees with what he believes to be the only way). He hates(or fears, perhaps both) whenever a situation does not go his way, that causes irritability and clear irrationality.

He wants the path to stay straight, how he had intended it to be. How he had wanted it to be. Aaron doesn't heed his rules and strictly keep to them and this man snaps because it'll never be a "he should listen"——instead it's "HE NEEDS TO LISTEN". I think that is what a ton of people missed due to Jess's not-so-good writing.

This mixture of anger and pure fear that if Aaron never obeyed, he'd end up the exact same way that he did. Or how his father did.

I really wish Jess ventured into the area of Derek's pattern of thinking, and I always grow so upset when that never become reality in the series. When you seriously look into Derek's character and as tedious as that may be, he's depressing. Whatever his father chose to do as a parent really screwed this guy up and made him become who he is in the present. And while that's his fault in a large capacity, I can't not blame his father for parenting awfully, too.

... I want to mention one more thing before I head to bed. Rowan and Derek's conversation in When Angels Fall, some viewed this as R straight up lying to Derek's face and I simply can't find myself agreeing. /nbr /lh

First thing Derek opened with. "Rowan, was.. I a good dad?" — "In your opinion, how did I do?" And this is so damn significant. R literally states that had been the last sentence Derek's father asked him(Rowan) on the day his death occured. Rowan isn't saying "yeah I think you abusing your child was the best shit yah ever done" he is expressing that Derek did what he could. With what he had, what he learned, what he went through:: "Even if it meant playing the bad guy." Going forward with explaining how strong he goddamn was and had been so for years, constantly fighting through the worst hardships. And when Derek expresses his suppressed daddy issues, Rowan is quick to not exactly disagree but express how much his father seriously loved him. I'm not entirely certain if others viewed that as an invalidating response, but these two seem incredibly close, have a bond, and trust. If anybody had the right of saying those words, sorry, but that person would be Rowan. I still wish that Derek and Rowan had a less bittersweet discussion than this however, they deserved better. The entire Lycan family deserved better.

Okok I am done with my humongous rants, and please do remember this was how I interrupted these scenes and characters. Completely fine if nobody else agrees. I'm going to try and rest now so my cold jumps off a cliff, goodnight or good morning to anyone seeing this 💕💕

~~

#aphmau derek #aphmau aaron #derek rant pt 2

[childlikegoblinqueen]

Writing Notes

I have ONE more chapter planned before I go on vacation but I am sooooooo spent from the last one I wrote. I have a bit of the next chapter mapped out and know where I want it to end, but I feel like I need to unload a bit about the last one, how I wrote it and why I head canon Bard Hunter.

Don't read anymore unless you have read Chapter 26 of Sweet Child O' Mine, and if you haven't read it yet, check it out :D It nearly killed me.

Spoilers below!

First, Why Bard Hunter? I will write another post later on regarding writing the actual fight scene and how music choices played into it.

So, while Hunter was in the Human Realm we pretty much see that he is creative. The sewing has been often noted as a way for Hunter to stay "close to Darius" since his "father figure" is far away and/or possibly dead, but he goes beyond learning how to "neatly sew".

After Camila shows Hunter how to use the sewing machine, he creates! His shirts and curtains etc. are chaotic! Patches every where! Very grunge/punk! We know that in the castle he had expressed curiosity which was constantly stamped out because he had a purpose and a path that he was not supposed to stray from or else ....

So being a music person myself I imagined that all the children would need MUSIC in order to heal fro their trauma, and there are likely a slew of popular bands/artists from the BI, but I would imagine that Hunter had not been permitted anything but whatever was Belos approved, which coming from a Puritan, was likely not great. Maybe some somber hymns to the Titan or to the emperor himself? Especially since Belos seemed to want to mold the grimwalkers into his ideal version of Caleb ("better version of an old frend". What an ass thing to say about a literal child!)

It has also been noted by some that when Raine seems to look back at Hunter during the scene in the castle where Hunter is ignored by the other Coven Heads, Raine seems low key concerned that this kid needs to get out of that place.

I do hope that Raine survives WAD. Part of my inspiration for Raine teaching Hunter how to mold Bard music is that not only are they both creative, but they are also the only two that have been possessed by Belos. In writing this scene and building their relationship, I thought about a simple way two people with shared trauma could communicate and heel without actually talking about the trauma. Music is perfect for that.

Eventually we will see how Hunter uses music to communicate in other ways, but we've already seen how he and Willow play a game where they try to guess the band and song based on a small portion of lyrics. They communicate non-verbally, but Willow realizes that Hunter is deeply depressed living with Darius, while living through the trials and dealing with the press. Likely Hunter doesn't realize this himself. Willow notes that Hunter is only playing while using Nirvana lyrics and having lived with him for months in the human realm, she’s aware that he listens to Nirvana when he’s depressed. Really, he's going through the motions and trying to appease someone he looks up to.

A lot of this story is about Hunter's own anxieties about becoming a parent, as well as the figures in his life who have parented him for better or for worse -- as well as parental figures like Odalia who are toxic, and Alador who knows that he messed up.

That was a flashback to the past. In the current timeline we know that Hunter and Willow have developed a healthy romantic relationship. He has strong bonds to his adoptive family of Camila, Luz, and Vee (his guitar belonged to Manny). He enjoys a good relationship with others in the Owl House universe. He has accomplished a lot, but prefers to stay out of the spotlight due to many things that took place both during his tenure in the castle and how he was treated by the public in the aftermath.

The thread about Perry's supposed protege, who alerted Hunter to other students trying to exploit a relationship with him during his first weeks at Hexside will be picked up again. I really try to leave bread crumbs without revealing too much upfront.

We also know that Dell has mentored him in palisman carving, and that he has somehow developed a healthy working relationship with Lilith who still works at the Supernatural History Museum.

I would hope that post Belos, the idea of "the savage ages" and "wild magic is evil" is a thing of the past as would be tracks at Hexside. So having Raine -- again being the only other one who hopefully survived possession -- teach Hunter to use the guitar he was gifted from his chosen family (Camila, Luz, and Vee) to generate magic was something I wanted to explore!

Which leads me to writing that dang scene.

#toh fanfic #ao3 fanfic #ao3 writer #huntlow fic #huntlow fanfiction #raine whispers #hunter deamonne #hunter noceda #hunter the golden guard #hunter wittebane #toh willow #the owl house raine #raine x eda #lumity #luz x amity #camila noceda #vee noceda #inspired by music #the owl house camila #toh boscha #fuck odalia #darius deamonne #alador blight

[monsterrae1]

RAE MY BELOVED

What made you decide to write an exes to lovers fic in the first place and why two in both their pov's?? I personally LOVE that you did that. The first one is SO good and I'm SO excited for Eddie's version!! ❤️❤️❤️

KJ 🖤 beloved 🖤

(I apologize this is going to be a long answer)

I was right at the begining of my last depressive episode, or as I call them, my Sad Girl Shit Era and my brain literally gave me the following scene out of nowhere at like 3am:

*

“You’re taking her side?” Eddie said, Buck took a deep breath and tried to remain calm.

“There are no sides to take, Eddie, all I’m saying is that I can empathize with how she felt”

“Oh, c’mon Buck, we…”

Buck stood up straight before Eddie finished talking, turning his back to him and moving closer to the kitchen door, trying to leave the room before Eddie said something stupid, before Eddie finally addressed their past only for him to say it hadn’t been love, that they hadn’t matter.

Buck’s heart wouldn’t be able to take it.

“Don’t” Buck said slowly, not brave enough to face Eddie and show him the tears already pooling on his eyes “Don’t say it wasn’t… Eddie, I loved you, I was so in love with you I was ready to follow you back to Texas, but you said no, you said you weren’t ready and I thought that’s okay, we can still have something” His words got stuck on his throat, taking one broken breath in “We can still be something and then you…” He blinked away tears “I woke up and you were gone, I had to hear it from Denis that you’d gone home earlier and you didn’t say goodbye, you broke my heart Eddie Diaz, don’t you dare say it wasn’t love, because it was, at least for me it was”

“Buck…” Eddie sounded chocked up too, but Buck still couldn’t stand to look at him, not right then, not when the hurt was everywhere he looked, in every corner of this house where for months he had pretended he had a place too, not when no matter how much he denied it, the love was there too.

“I can’t be here right now”

He took his things and left.

*

I woke up wrote it down in a note on my phone and the next morning I was like well this has potential for a great sad fic, i built the fic around that scene.

The decision to have Eddie's PoV came later on, mostly because I was listening to Taylor's Version of Red, and "Sad Beautiful Tragic" came out and I was like oh if I were to tell Eddie's side of the story that song matches it perfectly, and then my brain was like well why not do it. Next weekend I sat down and I wrote both outlines at the same time.

I'm glad I decided to tell Eddie's side of the story too, because some people read Buck's and kindly let me know in their comments that they didn't like Eddie and they were mad at him for what he put Buck through 😂 and i was like relax, he was hurt too you'll see you'll see

I'm happy to hear you're excited for Eddie's version! Hopefully it'll be out by the end of the month (I still have most of the LA arch to write lol)

Sleepover weekend send me stuff pls

#answered #kj <3 #wip just between us #wip what we had #i could honestly talk about this verse for hours idk why i never wanna shut up about it #sleepover weekend! send me stuff

[altschmerzes]

Hi! For some reason, your Locked Tomb resurrection story has constantly been on my mind ever since I first read it a few weeks ago. I don't have an Ao3 account (yet) so it took me a while to find the fic (once the brain worms got too intense and I knew I had to reread or I would go insane)- but I am so glad I did!

A bunch of my jumbled thoughts about it:

Marta is suddenly a really interesting character?? I will admit, she didn't really captivate me that much when I read the actual books but the way she's portrayed in this fic made me abruptly care a lot about her. I'm really curious to see how she will contribute to the story going forward

Magnus and Abigail, on the other hand, I did very much care about on the first read of TLT and your fic only made me love them more! IDK what it is about their characterization, I just felt like they brought a very distinct warmth to the scenes, and it made the moments where their grief shows through all the more poignant. Their relationship with the fourth house teens is obviously completely heartbreaking (one thing that each of the reunion scenes with them had in common was that they all made me fucking cry) and it just makes for the perfect combination of hurt and healing. It's the amount of love and care that they have for those kids and the way that it pains them to see them suffering- more importantly it's the fact that you wrote a story that could make me feel this way about people who aren't even real. So much talent T_T

There is too much hate in this fandom directed towards one (1) child cult leader with serious issues, and it sure isn't Harrow

Your story is one of the few that actually aligns with my interpretation of Silas Octakiseron. And does it well. The guilt and the repression and the need to repent for every action and the justifications...it all shows up in the way that you wrote him, and it shows up perfectly. I honestly don't know what you're going to do with Silas next, but whatever it is I know that it will be cleverly devised and I cannot wait.

Harrow....baby....I can't even

She's so alone and just completely undone by Gideon's loss...any fics that take place right after the conclusion of Gideon the Ninth must be hard to tackle because of how apparent Gideon's absence is. It manifests itself in so many ways in this one, but in Harrow most of all. She's lost her sense of purpose, and so she needs another one. She finds an anchor in the task of resurrecting people, and she seems to be at least alive on a functional level right now- but it does make me wonder what will happen after all of this is done. Where will Harrow even go? What will she do? Will she have the strength to do anything any more, or will she spend the rest of her life repenting for all of the ways in which she failed Gideon?

(Silas parallels, yet again ^^^)

The only minor complaint I have about this story at all is that the timeline is kind of confusing (probably just a me thing TBH. I don't read into this stuff very well) and I don't really get how much time passes between each of the resurrections. Like is it only a few hours or a day or so etc.?

And I have so many more thoughts. My brain is literally about to split. Now you can see why this could not fit into a single Ao3 comment

In conclusion: absolutely scrumptious fic, nourished the Locked Tomb brain worms more than sufficiently and managed to go beyond recommended levels of both hurt and comfort just to spite me, an inferior author of both, with how it can be done near perfectly. The day that the next chapter comes out I will become the absolute most annoying version of myself and it may even be enough to cure my depression. Or make it worse. Either works, as long as it's as remarkable as everything you've written so far!!

SO SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO ANSWER THIS i had like paragraphs typed out and then my page refreshed and i had to wallow in misery for a week

ANYWAYS. thank you for this. thank you so so so so much for this. this message is beyond delightful, i am so floored that my little story has been enough to spark this many thoughts in you. i'm responding at length to the stuff you've said (AGAIN. THANK YOU FOR IT. I GO NUTS FOR THE ABILITY TO TALK ABT MY PROJECTS LIKE THIS) so it's under a cut because it got,,,, long sldkf

marta!!!! i'm SO glad that she's a character i've made you care about in this fic, and that my take on silas strikes true for you. those two are my little pile of personal high investment blorbos. the second and the eighth are My Little Guys and i'm absolutely obsessed. they weren't there much in the books, for obvious reasons, but what WAS there got me so good and now i can't stop rotating them in my brain. i keep waffling on whether my take on silas particularly makes.... sense? so i'm always thrilled to hear when someone enjoys my presentation of him.

especially bc that like....... captivates me. the parallels between silas and harrow, both that exist and that sit sorta just past the presented in what can be extrapolated. it makes me want to chew drywall. the parallels, the reflections. (the siken quote right - they are the same and they are not the same. they are the same and they hate each other for it.) i could write one million words about these two and then write one million more after that. this fic is a little window into all of my very big and very complicated feelings about silas and harrow and the potential of putting them in a room and making them deal with each other. augh.

AND THE FIFTH...... i'm SO glad they had the impact i wanted them to here, that was part of why i sent abigail with harrow in her journeys through the penumbra. i'm a big believer in dark or sad or difficult stories needing moments to breathe and take a second, to show that there ARE good things in this world and this life. it makes the absence of those things or when the sources of those things are hurt hit that much harder. i'm SO thrilled i could manage to get you to feel even MORE abt them and their relationship with the fourth. that whole thing makes me SO upset especially getting to contrast the fifth and the way they interact with the fourth and how the fourth view them back, and how they've impacted the fourth's view of the world. and then the way that the other teens and young people around here - you've got 17 year old harrow, 16 year old silas, 18 year old gideon, judith is in her early 20s, even the sixth are like. baby years old and they're doing better than some of the others but oy vey.

the fourth feel so much different than the others and it's not just about their age, they're not that much younger than harrow. silas is only two years older than jeannemary. they're so different and it's not because they're so young, though that is a factor. it's that they're young in a way that harrow and gideon, and by extrapolation the others, just never got to be. because they had magnus and abigail, and that made a world of difference. im SO deep in my feelings about it 100% of the time.

about the timeline - i promise that's a bigol 'it's not you it's me' moment sdlkfjsd, that's my big flaw in writing XD i can either nail down the setting or the timeline but never both. if i have a coherent setting, i have no idea what day it is. if i have a concrete timeline woven into the narrative, the country it's set in slips out of my hands. such is the way!! at any rate, i don't even know what the timeline really is, but it's way closer to a couple of hours between resurrections at most.

again, seriously, thank you so so so so so so much for this. i can't put into words how beyond delighted this made me, and i've been reveling in it since i got it. the next chapter should be coming out soon (though i know i sound like a broken record about that by now lmao) and i really hope you enjoy it when it does!!! and i know this was a joke but don't let anything i've written discourage you from your own writing! i feel the same way so much of the time about other stuff i've read, and it feels so much better to turn it into motivation. like oh this is exactly what i want to do, what makes this work for me? etc. anyways. thank you so much, again. i'm so thrilled you liked it enough to write me a message like this about it. really, really made my week.

#gav gab #gav answers #fic: my dead are mine (and yours as well as mine) #WAILS #WAILS FOR FIVE HUNDRED YEARS #long post

[geminivenusrights]

Quora Dazai Analysis

Trigger warning: I’ll be talking about depression and suicide in a pretty straightforward and serious way.

Also, this contains spoilers for the first three seasons of the anime Bungou Stray Dogs.

Osamu Dazai has three sides to him: the suicidal maniac, the caring friend, and the serious/scary side that makes him such a frightening opponent. I’ll mainly be focussing on the first part.

Joking about suicide There’s probably more to it, but I think the most obvious answer would be depression. He doesn’t feel much passion for anything, which seemed to be worse in the Dark Era. He’s constantly trying to commit suicide, and doesn’t seem to be afraid of death, only picky about how he dies. In the anime, Dazai is mostly a comedic character who obsesses about suicide but at the same time always fails. The ironic part is that some depressed people joke about suicide as a coping mechanism. While Dazai himself doesn’t joke about it, the anime itself sure as hell does.

Suicidal maniac Dazai One thing that is clearly obvious is Dazai’s suicidal tendencies. A few examples are:

There’s one scene in which Dazai took mushrooms (drugs) as a suicide attempt.

He drowned himself in the river.

In the first episode, he talks about hanging himself.

So, why isn’t he dead yet?

This has two key factors. First of all, it has to do with his real-life counterpart. Osamu Dazai, the writer who tried to commit suicide several times but failed. It took him (I think) five tries before he actually succeeded in killing himself. Three of which were double suicides. Just like his real-life counterpart, Dazai fails at killing himself. In the anime, those fails are seen as comic relief. In real life, however, Osamu Dazai was quite a broken man who struggled with (drug, morphine, and alcohol) addiction. With each suicide attempt, I can imagine he only fell further down the black abyss that is called depression.

On a lighter note, the second reason BSD Dazai isn’t dead yet is that some part in him still wants to live. Especially if you compare the Dark Era Dazai and the Armed Detective Agency Dazai, he seems less grumpy, cracks more jokes, and is more annoying. Overall, he shows more emotions and seems to have the attitude of ‘I do still want to die, but it can wait,’ instead of ‘I don’t care about what happens to me.’ While still meaningless, there’s some part about life that has become fun. At first glance, it doesn’t seem that way; he’s definitely still actively trying to die, especially in the beginning. However, someone who has no other desire except for dying wouldn’t put so much effort into staying alive. While he definitely might still be struggling, it seems like he’s definitely getting better throughout the anime. I think this might be because he seems to feel a sense of responsibility for Atsushi.

No Longer Human My main reason to say that he has depression is obviously because of the writer Osamu Dazai. Another factor that comes into play is the book No Longer Human, which real-life Dazai wrote, and what BSD Dazai’s ability is named after. This book is basically seen as an autobiography of Osamu Dazai, and covers most (if not all) of what I mentioned above about him. I’d definitely recommend reading this. I do have to warn you because while it’s a pretty short read, the subjects covered are heavy and can definitely negatively affect your mental health if you’re in a fragile state of mind.

The bandages As you probably already know, Dazai has bandages around both of his arms. Some people in the fandom speculate that the bandages are because of self-harm scars. While this could be a possibility, I’m not sure about this one. It seems to be more of an homage to the author in his character design than the fact that he truly self-harmed.

Then there’s the bandage on his head, which Odaszaku tore off when he died. The more I think about it, the more I feel like this is the part where Dazai’s eyes were (literally) opened and he was kind of slapped out of his emotionless daze. It’s also the first time (and only time, for now) where Dazai was shown crying. I think this is the moment where Dazai’s life did a 180 and he began on his road to recovery, starting with leaving the Port Mafia.

Valuing life While joking about suicide could be considered wrong and distasteful, Bungou Stray Dogs subtly shows us a broken character, someone that people can relate to, who is still fighting for his life despite clearly wanting to die. And slowly but surely, the Suicidal Maniac Dazai will discover that life isn’t just meaningless and dull, that it has so much more to offer than just the constant feeling of nothingness.

CREDIT: Sophia Belle on Quora

[alpona]

Geats episode 11 liveblog:

- Tsumuri doing the recap again.

Ace's play pretend is getting so annoying ahaha...

- wah, game master directly addresed Ace's ulterior motive with this wish!

- Woah!! Ace's current wish is to BE DGP staff?!!  Yayy! Going step by step, full on with the 'investigate DGP to it's core' , go Ace-kun!

- yes, you and I both Ace-kun, DGP mystery is very interesting!

- yep Tsumuri knows about punkjack. But she's more likely unaware of DGP's darker side, or got her memory erased.

- Time to admit, I usually start skipping the opening after few episodes, but I wasn't able to do so in Geats yet. Congrats!

- Hello again Keiwa-kun! Ah, depressed Keiwa is so real it hurts...

- wow, it's as if the phrase 'wish the ground could swallow me up' became literally true 😂

- long story? Yes we're here to listen to Neon's father's backstory.

- oh hello bodyguards-san!

- important question time! Yes, why couldn't you, Ace-kun?

- Neon understands Ace's personality so well, *cries in human emotions*

- 😯 woaaahh!! The desire card can just glitch and literally reject a wish!! A seemingly simpler wish like finding someone...

Huhuhu the bigger mystery with Ace's mother intensifies!

- Maybe she won and made a wish not to be found, or she's the real villain this season muhuhaha! (Typical rider parent issues)

- oho, very main character like determination you're showing Ace-kun 😌

- through the rabbit hole! This scene is funny! And enjoy Ace-kun falling in style

- oh now we have alternate dimensions too? Alright cool, sure *more theories*

The place is beautiful btw.

- this is how Keiwa meets the others... So he's gonna accidentally touch a core ID and remember everything very soon I guess.

- Ace immediately teaming up with someone his age. Yes. I just called him a (2000 year old) child. Yes I did. 🙂😂

- Jamato riders! Yes I've seen the scans before, not gonna act surprised. From some pics though, I actually thought Keiwa was going to become a Jamato rider, hehe😄.

Their buckle design is pretty by the way.

- Metal Thunder is very useful. Really liking the beat buckle.

- Jamato riders are quite scary.

- unapproved things??! HUH! So you're admitting to be the evil behind these games openly now, Game master?

- 🤯 whoa... The... wa..i.... What did we just see!

Breaking news!!! DGP harvests Jamato thingies in a greenhouse!!! Wahahaha! Muhuhahaha!! (Ok why is it ME who's laughing like the villain?! Why am I so excited with this reveal 🤣)

What's this, mini hellheim from Gaim?

- we could all tell DGP being responsible, but I would've never thought of everything growing on trees lol

- And core IDs are like.. wait those are the broken IDs.. so those are the... seeds? Then jamatos are born from those? so jamatos indeed, in a way, ARE the dead players? oooo no....

- And we have a mad scientist who isn't following the boss's orders propertly.

- this now fits with the Jamatos plant like designs, and the growth/evolve aspect too. makes sense.

- so everything's very natural and organic yay 🥴

- Neon And Ace deciding to investigate kurama papa.

It's really nice how characters are directly talking to each other to solve things here!

- Whaaa, so people even lose the desire they wrote down of the lose!! I totally didn't see this coming. And I thought Keiwa was just in his depressed stage. Me trying to be understanding when there was no need, ok, back to being ruthless.

- It's grandpa's time to die.. I mean shine... Well, obviously to dieee...

- fever buckle. so fever buckle can double the power of each buckle, so fever boost is also boost boost, or boostX2 or double boost... ( What nonsense am I even saying?)

- it's like Boost saying 'get yourself together!' to Keiwa-kun lol. Let's not forget the real protagonists haha

- granpa survived this episode! Wah! He's a nice guy.

Very interesting episode. Next week, looks like Tycoon will be back!

#kamen rider geats #kr geats #geats liveblog #sakurai keiwa

[hellostarrynightblr]

This June’s post is so long overdue it’s not even funny, but I wasn’t particularly passionate about the movies I watched in June, hence the long delay. There were two absolute gems, but everything else is passable at best and complete nightmare at worst.

1. Favourite movies: Top Gun: Maverick (2022); Pride (2014). 2. Decent movies I liked / appreciated but not loved: Bureau of Missing Persons (1933). It's a cute little 30s investigative journalism flick and it was really nice to see. Such a pleasant blast! 3. Best scenes: mum's hospital visit / 'Where are my lesbians?' (Pride, 2014); Great Balls of Fire / aerial scenes (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022); coming clean (Bureau of Missing Persons, 1933); ‘Room for one more?’ (Terror by Night, 1946). 4. Favourite genres: adventure, noir. 5. Favourite directors: Joseph Kosinski (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022). There's absolutely no competition this time! I also really enjoyed Matthew Warchus's Pride (2014). 6. Favourite actors: Richard Conte (Hollywood Story, 1951); Jeanne Crain (Dangerous Crossing, 1953); Tom Cruise, Miles Teller (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022); Imelda Staunton, Ben Schnetzer, Andrew Scott (Pride, 2014). 7. Least favourite performances: No one was particularly bad, but Steven Geray in So Dark the Night (1946) was painfully bland, and literally anyone in The Bad Seed (1956) was overacting like there was no tomorrow. 8. The most wasted cast: Whle the film is okay, I do feel very disappointed when it comes to If I Had a Million (1932). Some of my favourite directord were responsible for segments of this film. H. Bruce Humberstone (segment "The Forger"), Ernst Lubitsch (segment "The Clerk"), Norman Z. McLeod (segments "China Shop", "Road Hogs"), William A. Seiter (segment "The Three Marines"). Joseph L. Mankiewicz wrote the majority of the segments. Not even to mention the actors! Gary Cooper, Charles Laughton, George Raft, Jack Oakie, W.C. Fields, Roscoe Karns. This could've been so much better had they at the very least committed to a tone. 9. The best wasted premise: If I Had a Million (1932). Make it a straight drama (just don't forget to market it as such) or a laugh-out-loud comedy. Connect the stories so it feels united. What you don't make is a disjointed film that jumps wildly between slapstick humour and depressing end-of-life drama. It's like the film has bipolar. 10. Best premise: Pride (2014). Fish-out-of-water has never been done exactly like this. 11. Favourite cast: literally anyone and everyone in both 2014's Pride and 2022's Top Gun: Maverick. 12. Favourite on-screen duos: Ben Schnetzer with literally anyone in Pride (2014); Tom Cruise x Miles Teller (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022); Roscoe Karns x Gary Cooper (If I Had a Million, 1932); Bette Davis x Pat O'Brien (Bureau of Missing Persons, 1933); Richard Conte x Julie Adams (Hollywood Story, 1951); James Cagney x Pat O'Brien (Boy Meets Girl, 1938). The last duo is pure gold even when the film is subpar at best. Almost makes me want to rewatch Angels With Dirty Faces (1938). 13. Favourite on-screen relationships: Butch Saunders + Norma Roberts (Bureau of Missing Persons, 1933); Larry O'Brien + Sally Rousseau (Hollywood Story, 1951); CAPT Pete "Maverick" Mitchell + Penny Benjamin (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022). 14. Favourite characters: everyone in Pride (2014), even the moronic characters; Butch Saunders (Bureau of Missing Persons, 1933); Larry O'Brien (Hollywood Story, 1951); CAPT Pete "Maverick" Mitchell, LT Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022). 15. Favourite quote: Why don't you break out with hives and scratch yourself to death? (Bureau of Missing Persons, 1933). I wanted to choose the 'Where are my lesbians?' from Pride (2014) but I doubt it constitutes as a quote. 16. Favourite fact discovered in 2022: real-life near-military preparations for Top Gun: Maverick (2022). It gave me faith in movies again. 17. The most overrated film: The Bad Seed (1956). It was really tedious. It did have its moments but mostly was extremelly underwhelming, especially with that ending. 18. The most disappointing film: So Dark the Night (1946). It went off a cliff in the end. Completely and utterly. Also, Impact (1949). Only after reading thr synopsis did I realise that I’ve actually seen the film. It’s so utterly forgettable! 19. The biggest surprise: Pride (2014)! 20. Best cinematography: Top Gun: Maverick (2022). There's no choice, not really. 21. Best set design: Dead of Night (1945). 22. Best costume design: Renié for Dangerous Crossing (1953). If there was anything to love about this film it's how stunning Jeanne Crain looked. 23. Best music: Top Gun: Maverick (2022). Great Balls of Fire is unbeatable, mate! 24. Best prooduction choice: shooting with limited CGI (Top Gun: Maverick, 2022). It made the film timeless. 25. Worst production choice: so many to choose from! The inconsistent tone in If I Had a Million (1932); changing the ending in The Bad Seed (1956); the terrible audition scene 99 River Street (1953); making Where Danger Lives (1950) kind of an Out of the Past (1947) knock-off; the plot twist in So Dark the Night (1946), passive direction in Highway Dragnet (1954). 26. Film of the month: Top Gun: Maverick (2022) with Pride (2014) only slightly behind.

#remember2022 #highlights #june

[aquilacalvitium]

Hello!!! I’ve been trying to find you for weeks! I noticed you like Black Veil Brides a while back and decided to try listening to them again. I used to listen to them back in high school, and when I tried them again I promptly hyperfixated and now I’ve been listening to almost nothing but The Phantom Tomorrow album for like...a month lol. Also bought two entire albums over a weekend. Only problem was I couldn’t remember which of the people I followed had started the whole thing...but I finally found you just now! So 1) thank you for getting me back into BVB, unintentional though it may have been, and 2) please tell me anything you want about BVB. Literally anything. Take this as an opportunity to infodump if you’d like. There’s definitely a lot I don’t know!

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM BOI (gender neutral) you don't know how happy these words make me!!!

So firstly hi hello I'm SO HAPPY I got you back into BVB!! Also you probably sent this to my BVB side blog so yeah this is my main account :3

WHERE. TO. BEGIN???

Well I, like you, first listened to them in high school then stopped for several years before diving head-first in and playing their music on repeat for months! I remember there were just a select few I listened to at first including Fallen Angels, In The End and one or two others. I also found Wake Up in college when they uploaded the music video close to my birthday and I played that on repeat for weeks. THEN FINALLY I went all in, bought all of their music and ever since about 80-90% of what I listen to has been BVB! I'm even considering getting a couple of BVB tattoos 👀

BUT when someone asks me to talk about BVB, the main thing I want to talk about is Legion of the Black, and judging by your ask you haven't been deep into the BVB fandom for super long so this Legion of the Black (LotB) may have slipped under your radar. Allow me to clarify!

In 2013, BVB released Wretched and Divine (WaD), their third album (and my favourite). Along with the album, they also released LotB, a film that's basically just a feature-length music video. The film includes every single track from the album (yes even the transmissions) in a different order to how they're listed in WaD because they tell a story! I won't spoil what the story is and if you want to watch it, I found the full version on youtube for you! You can also buy Wretched and Divine Ultimate Edition which includes both the CD and DVD, or Deluxe Edition which has all that PLUS Behind the Scenes footage!

Watching LotB will also shed some light on the Born Again music video that they released today 👀👀👀

And one last thing to bore you with, I wrote a non-smut, fully completed fanfiction about LotB! It's an OC-insert and the main character is nonbinary. The story is actually pretty dark as the main character goes through a heavy bout of depression and everything that comes with it, but all content warnings are listed in the fic description and at the beginnings of each chapter, that way you can skip specific chapters that include things you don't like and still read the rest. I'm also working up the energy to add a synopsis to each chapter for those who skipped but still want to know what happened. I'm just lazy 😅

And because Ashley was present at the time LotB was released, but I wrote it after Lonny joined, I found a way to keep both of them in.

Oh and if you didn't know, Ashley Purdy the bassist left the band in 2019 and his spot was soon taken by Lonny Eagleton. There are rumours going around about why Ashley left, some are quite mean, but people tend to do that when someone they like changes career paths or leaves a group or whatever so I don't know how true they are.

I'm also slowly writing an essay of sorts on the history of the band and it's individual members, but it's not yet complete and idk where/if I'll post it when it is because it's not exactly the kind of writing I can post on AO3

ANYWAY that's about all the infodumping for now! But by all means feel free to ask me anything, I can almost guarantee I'll have an answer 😋 (special interest my beloved)

#bvb #black veil brides #aquila answers #aquila infodumps

[unhingedhearties]

Damn, I used up all my atomic bomb references.

A few days ago When Calls The Heart actress Erin Krakow posted another Behind The Scenes photo from Season 10, the season that just aired a few months ago. For context, there's a scene where her character Elizabeth gets a box with the wedding dress she ordered (for her wedding that never ended up happening). It turns out to not only be the wrong dress, but very ugly. Elizabeth puts it on and laughs are had. Erin posted a series of photos of her and co-star Pascale Hutton being silly while Erin's still in the ugly dress.

You can all guess what happened next. First, some of the reactions from Twitter:

"If the show had gone the way I wanted it to go, these photos would be fine. But I didn't get what I wanted, so these photos of you two having fun that other people are enjoying are tone-deaf."

You might remember foxyinspiration. They're the person who is constantly insulting Erin on her Instagram about how awful she is and keeps emphasizing that she's a female producer for some reason.

There's nothing I can add that'll make this funnier than it already is. A grown-ass woman of voting age wrote this. Back to the responses on Instagram:

Deidre Behar, the producer/host for Entertainment Tonight comments and Erin responds. Repeat offender and stalker amintmimi takes the opportunity to make an ass of herself and will continue to do so multiple times.

Pascale Hutton also shows up and with her a chance for amintmini to show her ass again. The word "disrespectful" shows up, so take a drink. The senior citizen who spends all her time spamming every post Erin makes looking for evidence of targeted attack against her and other Lucas fans calls her and Pascale "immature teenagers" for this series of photos of them smiling in a field. Her personality is so bitter and miserable that the sight of others being happy causes her to froth from her toothless mouth.

"IT'S MORE THAN A SHOW"

People are finally starting to try and slap some reality into these unhinged Heartie's heads. Amintermimi the Ragepig is aghast at the "rude" responses, clearly believing she's done nothing to warrant it. She, like many other smooth-brained Team Lucas fans keeps mentioning that Team Nathan fans sent him death threats. I've yet to find any. If someone has proof of this, please share it.

"Look, it's cute that you two are having fun, but have you considered my feelings and how all these photos are hurting me? I could unfollow, but what will I do to fill the void of my empty life? Work on being a person that enriches the lives of those around me? No, it's too late for that. I'd rather suck out the happiness of everyone near me."

Best response.

"why do you keep showing this dress"

This is literally the first time she's posted a photo of it.

"Are you trying to leave some kind of clue for season 11?"

OH SHIT THEY FIGURED IT OUT! Get out your decoder rings and put on your 3-D glasses 'cause we're going to bust this thing wide open.

Erin and Pascale are both standing beside each other making the shape of two 1's OR . . . AN 11. LIKE SEASON 11! Erin is standing to Pascale's left. JUST LIKE A BRIDE AT THE ALTER! Pascale can be seen in one of the photos holding Erin's hand like she's proposing. Look at what color she's wearing. RED! You know who else wears red? NATHAN! In the distance we can see the sun setting. This represents the sun setting on Elizabeth and Lucas's relationship as it comes to an end. And what is Erin doing in all these photos as the sun sets? SMILING! She's smiling at the thought of Lucabeth fans spiraling into morbid depression. But the most damning evidence of all?

Enhance.

Mother of God…

There's some sort of giant bench monument in the background. It's hard to make out, but if you invert the colors…

That's clearly Lindsay Sturman and Brian Bird's handwriting. We caught them both dead to rights.

Erin's mocking the wedding. I told you guys the signs are everywhere! Thankfully more people are calling out these dumb reactions, but of course the worn out argument of Lucabeth fans shows up. Team Nathan fans acted the same way and it was reprehensible, but when Team Lucas fans do it it's simultaneously okay, but also they're not doing it because the situation is not the same. Any time a Team Nathan fans points out "now you know how we felt" they do a bunch of back flips to explain how this is a totally different scenario.

RAGEPIG! SooREEEEEEEE!

A compilation of the feral hog's comments and responses. It's just the same words over and over because they have no real argument.

Sweetie, you can give the dictionary definition on the word "invest" until you're blue in your pseudo-intellectual face. The point is no one should be "investing" their lives into a TV show. Go develop a real personality instead of "blob that parks her fat ass on the couch every time the TV turns on."

Oh look! A Lucabeth fan saying that it should have been Nathan and Faith together instead of him and Mei. I'm sure all those Lucabeth fans that are good, socially conscience allies will come in and point out how racist that kind of thinking is.

If by "fans" you just mean your dumb little clique of mentally stunted women-children I could see where you're coming from, but there's actually tons of fans out there who aren't triggered by a photo of two women smiling. Look! You can even see them posting on this very photo! Amazing :D

(And the whole point was that the dress she's wearing wasn't the wedding dress. Try to pay attention to the TV show you're obsessing over).

It's all well and good that the people who work on this show have fun and share it with their fans, but they need to take into consideration that fans that are literally dying of heartbreak. Please be more sensitive about what you post and avoid the photos that can cause irreparable harm.

Which is all of them.

Every photo you post will set them off.

There's literally nothing you could share online that won't make them screech at their monitors.

badcruelunkinduncaringmeaninsensitive.png

You all remember that time Brain Bird and Lindsay Sturman came on TV and Men In Black style took away everyone's memories of Lucas and Elizabeth's special moments? No, me neither. Which is proof that it happened!

But if they go away, who are you going to harass all day instead of spending time with your family (assuming they still want anything to do with you)?

"I can't wait till you have to tell LJ why his father is dead… oh LJ it's because of Nathan the man I love"

I have AMAZING news. LJ is never going to learn how his father died because LJ isn't real, his father isn't dead, the fictional character Nathan didn't kill him, nor did the flesh and blood actor Kevin McGarry and Erin isn't actually his mother. This works out for everyone!

#when calls the heart #wcth #lucabeth #hearties #hallmark #unhinged fans #fandom drama