#why are so many of my dreams entertaining to recount but so distressing to actually live through | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

allmysticwords · 4 years

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BTS Reaction to them cheating on you.

For @micchikari. I hope you like it :)

GENRE: Angst

PAIRING: BTS X Reader

TAG: SAD SAD SAD SAD ! EVEN THE PICTURES ARE SAD ! Also slight suggestive content.

Find PART II HERE

Requestlist | Masterlist

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Kim Seokjin

Seokjin was taking a shower and you were still in bed sleeping. Lately, he had been very busy always coming home late and always leaving early. You understood though, idol life was not easy. He always made up for it by talking to you amongst other things before you went to bed and sending sweet texts throughout the day, occasionally meeting you for lunch when you had your break near your office. It was tough but you were happy. Until right now. Jin was in the shower but his phone kept ringing waking you up from your sleep. You don’t usually check his phone, but you picked up thinking that it could be an important call from BigHit.

But before you could say anything what the girl on the other end of the line said broke your heart, “Jin oppa, I’m waiting for you in the white lingerie that bought me, please hurry.”

You didn’t quite understand what she said or meant, “Excuse me, what did you say?” you questioned her.

“Oh, I’m sorry I thought this was Kim Seokjin’s phone.” She said and disconnected the call.

“It is” you quietly whispered. Just as Jin walked out of the shower and saw his phone in your hand and a distressed look in your eyes. He understood you know.

“Y/n I can explain” You were frantically picking up all your things and throwing them in your bag. “Y/n wait. It’s not what it seems. Y/n I love you.”

You put your bag on your shoulders and without looking at Jin said, “no you don’t or else you wouldn’t be gifting lingerie to any other girl.”

Jin was surprised at your outburst but kept his calm. He tried to hold your hand but you pushed him away.

“I’ll pick up the rest of my things when you’re not here.” You said as you walked away.

“Don’t try calling me. We’re done.”

With this you slammed the front door shut both on Jin and your 2-year long relationship, leaving a very sad and panicky Jin on the other side.

---

Min Yoongi

You were walking home from work today to enjoy the nice weather. Lately you had thrown yourself into work to escape the memories and the heartbreak of your last relationship. You were hardly yourself anymore, the chirpy and happy girl was replaced with a tough looking and poker-faced woman. You never went out with your friends; you only listened to English music and avoided any Korean entertainment news at all costs.

Your breakup with Yoongi had left quite an impact on you. This is why you were taken aback to see him at your doorstep. To say you were ready to meet him again would be a lie. The flashback of him kissing another girls’ lips as his hands roamed all over body made you want to throw up.

Yoongi got up when he saw you, “How have you been y/n. I missed you so much.” “Why are you here?” you questioned him with absolutely no emotion in your voice. “I had a dream about us. We were happy. I want you back.” He said walking towards you. “And I still have dreams of you kissing her.” “Please leave Yoongi, I don’t want anything to do with you.” You sighed walking away from him and into your apartment.

“I wrote a song about you y/n. I write all my songs about you.” Yoongi cried out before you could shut the door.

“Well it’s a good thing I don’t listen to them anymore.” With that you walked inside, leaving a dejected and crying Yoongi behind.

---

Jung Hoseok

You saw it on the news. You saw it on twitter. You saw it in the papers. Hoseok at a club kissing some random girls’ lips. His hand on the small of her back. Both of them swaying to a slow song. The video had made waves in the Korean media and BigHit had no option but to release a statement saying Hoseok and that girl were dating.

This left you devastated. The fact that Hoseok was kissing someone else while on tour was hard enough but now the whole world knew that the girl was his girlfriend was harder.

Hoseok kept calling you from London. And you kept avoiding his calls. He left you voicenotes and you deleted them. You didn’t want to hear any excuses. You loved him but you would never put yourself through the pain of dating someone who cheated on you.

After a week since the news broke you saw Hoseok. He came to your place with peonies in his hands. As if flowers could magically heal what he broke. He looked sad, tired eyes and sunken cheeks. You didn’t look any better. To say that you hadn’t been crying since a week would be a lie.

“I’m sorry y/n. I’m really sorry. Please just hear me out.” “I’m sorry too Hoseok, but I can’t.” “Please leave. It’s over.”

You couldn’t hear the excuses. You feared you would run back into Hobi’s arms. So you shut the door, leaving Hobi holding a bouquet in one hand and wiping his tears with the other.

---

Kim Namjoon

Lately you and Namjoon have been drifting apart. The work keeps him busy and he doesn’t come home many nights. He says he is sleeping at the dorms, but you suspect that he is in his studio working his ass off for Bangtan. So, you decide to surprise him on the day he texted you saying he’ll have dinner at home. You wore his favorite lingerie, a deep red lace set. You dolled up, carefully doing your makeup and curling your hair. You lit some candles in the room. Then you waited for Joon to come home. He had been stressed lately and you were planning to take all the stress away. Also, you missed him and his touch. When you heard the lock being rattled you excitedly sat on the bed, ready to present a show. However, when Namjoon came in the room instead of excitement and happiness his eyes spoke something else. He wouldn’t even look at you properly. You were confused. So, you walked up to him and stroked his cheek. “What’s wrong Joon, did something happen?” “I think we need to talk y/n” You understood something is wrong. You quickly pulled on your robe and you and Namjoon sat side by side as he recounted that while he was out last week with the boys he made a mistake. As soon as he said this you got up from beside him. He went to take your hand in his but you pushed it away. Folding your hands at your chest you looked at him, “How dare you come see me after that.” “It didn’t mean anything y/n I was just blowing off steam.” “I don’t know how this happened I was just really drunk and stressed and she was there, it just sort of happened.” He was crying. More so because you were completely calm. Expressionless even. “I think you should leave Namjoon.” You said his full name. Not Joonie and not Joon. He knew he had lost you so without putting up a fight he left. As soon as he left you slid down on the floor, crying.

---

Park Jimin

Jimin was taken aback to see you in Paris. He was here for his vacation and saw you walking the cobbled streets with your bag in one hand and your camera in another. He hadn’t seen you for almost a year now. It seemed like he had forgotten how beautiful you looked because as he was looking at you now with the sun shining in your face, you looked ethereal. Your hair was shorter now, but the style really suited you. What he noticed instantly though was how happy you looked.

He was taken back to the night when you were crying your eyes out because you saw him with another girl at the studio. He never forgave himself for cheating on you. You never forgave him too. Even when he apologized a million time, even when he cried a million times and even when he promised you that you were the only one he loved. It was true. He really did love you. Even now after a year. He hadn’t dated anyone since then. So seeing you here in Paris he thought he should talk to you.

Until he saw a man coming out of the ice cream store with 2 ice creams in his hand. Mint Chocochip, your favorite. You took the ice cream and gave the man a small peck.

Jimin could do nothing but stare at the two of you walk away hand in hand. The distance he thought, definitely did you well and he was by no means going to hurt you again by coming into your life.

---

Kim Taehyung

It was 2 am and Taehyung was still not home. It was a regular occurrence nowadays and you didn’t know what to do. Lately it felt like you were drifting apart more and more and only you were concerned about this. Yet, you still waited for him to come before sleeping every night.

He entered the house around 2:30 and thinking you were asleep went to the kitchen. He was on the phone with someone, speaking in hushed tones. “Yeah baby, I just reached home. No don’t worry, she doesn’t suspect a thing.”

He didn’t realize that you were standing at the doorway listening to his conversation. He turned around from the fridge and you took in his appearance. There were red lipstick marks on the collar of his white t-shirt, his hair was disheveled and as he walked past you barely acknowledging you and into your shared bedroom you could smell a woman’s perfume.

It was as if he wanted you to suspect things. He didn’t even care. You were angry and heartbroken. You couldn’t believe you ignored the signs. You also couldn’t believe Taehyung didn’t even mind that you knew, he looked almost glad that you understood.

So that night you didn’t sleep in your bed. You actually didn’t sleep at all. As soon as it was morning, you wiped your tears, packed your stuff and left a note behind for Taehyung who was still asleep.

“I know. I think I’ve known for a while. What hurt the most was that if you wanted out of this relationship you could’ve spoked to me but instead you did the one thing, I feared the most. But don’t worry, I’ll be okay. Just don’t try to contact me ever again. – Y/n”

---

Jeon Jungkook

You and Jungkook had been dating for a while now, almost 8 months. When Jungkook asked you out, you couldn’t believe it. He was a superstar and you were just an ordinary makeup artist. From the minute you met him you fell head over heels in love with him. And who wouldn’t, he was an angel both inside and out. It wasn’t his looks that you fell for but how sweet and nice he was to you. Jungkook also fell for you. He said you were the normal in his life that he craved. That you were the thing that kept him sane from the glamour of the idol life. But you were scared to be in a relationship with him. You knew he was way out of your league, it wasn’t that you disdn’t like how you looked but you knew you could never compare to the other stars he was always around. And you voiced your concerns to him.

He would however always shut down such doubts. He made sure he told you how much he loved you and how he would never leave you.

So, the pictures you saw on his phone clearly came as a surprise. You and him were at a café and he had gone to the washroom. His phone was lit up and there was a picture that came up. He and another idol girl were kissing in the picture. She had texted it to him saying how she missed him.

You were taken aback. The one thing you were insecure about in the relationship is the thing that Jungkook exploited the most.

You decided to cut off all contact with him after you saw those pictures. He came back to sit on the table with a wide smile but as soon as he saw your face, he knew something was wrong.

You told him he got a text while he was gone and picked up your things. His eyes widened with panic.

“Y/n wait..” but before he could say anything else you walked out of the café and his life.

---

-Pratz

Please let me know what you thought of this :)

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damn-daemon · 5 years

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My Unposted Star Wars Story 2

So @marvelousthronewars wants to read more, and who am I to deny her? Also anyone else who wants to read it. Part one is here.

Dantooine had never been known for inclement weather. The monotony of its climate was what made its gently rolling hills a prime choice for a variety of crops. Even so, it was sparsely populated. Not many were comfortable being so far from the galactic core.

It was what had made it so perfect for the Jedi to begin anew.

But on the day she left, it rained, hard. Wind would whip across the open fields with a vengeance, dragging anything not tied down with it. Lightning would streak across the sky, providing the only light source for miles as power was cut to various households. Though at the time, it had not looked that way. The day was dark, cool, but hardly anything threatening.

After all these years, she found it sickly poetic.

Her father and Chewbacca had already entered the Falcon, waiting as long as they needed to for her to finally say goodbye.

Ben stood at the base of the ramp, making sure not to actually set foot on it. Back then she had thought he was tempted to join her as well. Maybe if he had…

She stood a few steps up, finally at eye level with her monstrously tall brother.

“You don’t hate me, do you?”

He had cracked a smile then, as crooked as their father’s. “Why would I hate you?”

“I’m leaving you.”

“I can’t hold you back forever.”

Elara had stepped back down then. Even at eighteen, he made her feel so much younger when she stood toe to toe with him. “You could still come with. Dad’s terrible at this, but I know he misses you too.”

He was quiet then, contemplative. “And what would I do out there, El?”

She opened her mouth to say something, but the words never came. The wind picked up and stole them away. The rain started its downpour, but Ben never moved, watching her with a look he’d never give anyone else. She’d hugged him then, unafraid to admit the rain was covering her tears.

When she finally let go, her clothes peeled off from his, sticky and red. Elara looked down at her robes and hands, shaking. The rain had stopped, the wind stilled, leaving nothing but a deathly calm.

She looked up to an empty space where her brother once was.

And in the distance, a fire burning brightly…

. . .

Hosnian Prime

Elara opened her eyes slowly, taking in the red numbers on her nightstand that told her she had gone to bed maybe two hours earlier. She stared at them, watching as they slowly ticked another minute gone. The hum of the ventilation was oddly calming.

She thought to close her eyes again. There were still plenty of hours left in the early morning before she had to be in the office, but Elara knew that even if sleep came, it would be more of the same.

When she’d first had the dream, she had woken up screaming in the dead of night until her father had burst into the room, blaster at the ready. He had held her as she hit him, hugged him, and cried into his shirt. She had said nothing to him as she felt his tears trickle onto the top of her head.

It had been some time since she’d had the dream. Most nights, she worked herself into an exhaustion that allowed no room for dreams to plague her sleep. It was easy to avoid talking about it when her job demanded she do so anyway. She supposed being on the losing end of a battle had some benefits.

Tonight had been no different, or so she thought. It was because her mother had shown up, she told herself, or…Poe.

That was a memory she had not expected to see again. His happy recounting of their childhood had been as wonderful as it was painful.

With a sigh, Elara rolled out of bed. Her bare feet trekked across the cold floor, willing the rest of her body to wake up. She hit the nearby control panel, watching as her windowpane cleared and revealed the ever-present lights of Republic City. As numerous as the stars, she had told herself when she first saw it years ago. Air speeders, constantly on the move and never seeming to land, zipped by her window, unaware of her scrutiny. So many individuals, unaware of what was happening in the galaxy around them, or perhaps too aware.

And what would I do out there, El?

Elara took a breath, balling up her hands as they began to shake. That was a question she still had no answer to. Ben had been a boy with too many gifts, and no place to properly use them. Sometimes, even Luke had no idea why he was able to do the things he could. It had left her brother confused, and over the years, his confusion had turned to frustration and anger.

But she had never expected him to…

No. That was not a road she was ready to head down again.

As if able to sense her distress, the door to her bedroom opened, revealing a green-tinted protocol droid. TC-23, a gift from Kaid near the start of her senatorial career because of her family’s apparent love for ‘all technological things outdated,’ meandered into the room, her joints making that all too familiar whir that she had come to associate with her kind. Elara had thought about fixing it once, not that protocol droids needed subtlety, but silence was nice every now and again.

“I hope I have not disturbed you, Mistress Elara,” a hollow, feminine voice spoke. It was a rare variety, one she had no doubt Kaid sought on purpose.

“No, Two-three, I was already up,” Elara replied, turning to the droid. “What is it?”

“A priority message for you, regarding Senator Prost.”

Terra Rise Apartments Business District Republic City

It was a part of town she hardly visited, an upper scale district where export businesses kept their offices. This was where most of the high rises were, striking at the atmosphere as if it were a challenge. Money was no issue, as most buildings were intricately decorated with carvings and other unnecessary adornments. Even as a senator, the current apartment complex she was standing in was still far out of reach of her budget. Its lobby alone cost more than entire colonies.

If there were a place more corrupt than the Senate, it would be here.

It seemed appropriate for Prost, who had, of course, been granted house arrest during the course of the investigation. Then again, it was usually standard for any senator, but the thought of tossing him into prison for even one night entertained her.

Security officers and droids were crawling all over the lobby when she entered, filling the air with a variety of beeps and languages, most too frantic for her to make out. There were a few of the evening staff huddled in the corner being questioned by one of the officers, but otherwise Elara was the only civilian present. Despite that, no one seemed to pay her much attention.

Elara took a breath, closing her eyes and clearing her mind. The din smoothed and slowed, allowing her mind to navigate its way across the conversations, picking and choosing dialogues at will.

“…turned off of course. Cameras are never…”

“…nothing I’ve ever seen before. Jaren got sick in the hall…”

“…had this coming. You hear the news the other night?”

A hand clasped her shoulder and Elara felt her senses return to normal. Looking over, she found Kaid staring down at her, still wearing his robes from their last session. It seemed no one liked to sleep in the city.

“They called you too?” She watched him nod. “Any idea what’s going on?”

“Nothing good.”

Elara rolled her eyes. “Useful as always, Kaid.”

They stood there in amenable silence for a few minutes, watching the chaos around them and attempting to piece it all together. Even with her abilities, it was hard to say what they were talking about. Clearly a gag order had been placed, something incredibly hush hush. Given where they were, it was surprising that there had been no media presence outside.

She had a bad feeling about this.

After nearly half an hour, one of the turbolifts opened and an officer roughly ten years older than the others stepped out. The man in charge, she guessed. He walked with an air of authority, head held high, but even so, he seemed pale to her, as if whatever awaited them upstairs was something even a veteran could not quite imagine.

“Senator Organa, I am Chief Investigator Ralway,” he bowed, accent thick from a life of smoking. “I apologize for the late hour, but there is a situation in the building that requires your attention.”

“My attention?” Elara asked, stepping back. She could feel Kaid’s eyes boring into her, which only made her wrap the light jacket she had grabbed tighter. “I barely fly through this district, much less conduct any business in it.”

Ralway sighed, some color returning to his cheeks. “I can’t explain it here and…it would be better to show you anyway.”

He briefly looked over at Kaid, eyes narrowing before he nodded and pointed them forward. The three entered the turbolift he had just exited, the only one working it seemed, and began to ascend.

It was quiet again, though far less comfortable. Elara watched the inspector, who had taken out a datapad and was furiously typing away on it. The hand that held it was shaking, she noted.

Briefly, she glanced up at Kaid, whose gaze was also focused on the datapad. There was a seriousness in his dark eyes she had not seen before. It only added to the terrible feeling in her gut.

“Chief Ralway,” she started, softly so as to not spook him, yet she thought he jumped anyway. “What use could your investigation have for a senator?”

The shaking stopped as he snorted. “If I needed a senator, I’d have called a dimwit I can’t stand, purely for the pleasure of forcing them out of their fancy beds.”

Elara cracked a small smile at that as Ralway took a breath.

“No, I need a Skywalker.”

The air grew thick, the only sound her sharp intake of breath and the quiet whir of the lift in transit. Even Kaid knew better than to comment on anything like this.

Ralway cleared his throat. “I served in the Rebellion, under your uncle’s command a few times. He was an excellent pilot, and a skilled fighter too. We all looked up to him, him and that…”

He trailed off, but did not seem to notice. Elara looked back to him, watching the color drain from his face once more. She closed her eyes, calming her fraying nerves. The Force was whispering things to her, but she willed the words away. She did not like what it had to say.

When the turbolift came to a halt, Ralway stepped through the threshold into the darkened hallway. Emergency lights had been activated, providing bright light every few feet, but what they could not reach fell starkly black, giving the complex an abandoned feel, despite being one of the most populous places in the area. Elara wondered where the residents had gone.

Medical technicians made their way through the wide hall, pushing two gurneys. Kaid pulled her aside, standing still as they passed. Black tarps gave little indication as to what lay beneath, but Elara got the distinct impression that something was watching them.

“Was there a fight?” Kaid called out to Ralway, who had yet to stop. The dark uniform of the Hosnian Security Force allowed him to briefly disappear until he reemerged in the glow of another light. “What happened here?”

He did not answer.

They continued to follow, suddenly alone in the partial darkness. No tenants stood outside their apartments, no noises came from within. The security officers were nowhere to be found, neither keeping guard nor rounding up evidence. There weren’t even any droids.

Ralway stood just outside the door, purposely out of its sight, she guessed. The strangest look had come across his face, fear and forlorn, a feeling of…repetition.

Elara blinked at the impression the Force gave her. She felt at the edge of a cliff, and the doorway was the drop; she did not have to enter, she told herself, but even as she saw the warning in the chief’s eyes, Elara felt her body turning into the room. She never had been good at running from the inevitable.

Two lights had been set inside the apartment, powered by their own generators. Had it not been for the activated windowpanes, Elara would have had no idea how large the space was. It must have been the size of half the building, but the lights were focused on only one spot.

The wall directly across from the door was enveloped in the light, glowing a faint yellow except for its very center. A thick slash through the wall had blackened the material, melting what it could, burning what it could not. A thin trail of smoke still rose from it, and wires sparked deep inside, some feet away from the wall.

A deep cold passed over Elara, blackness that threatened to drown her.

The dark side.

She let the feeling slip over her head. It stung, much like diving into a freezing lake, but there was something she needed to search for. In the few moments it took Kaid to enter the room, Elara had sifted through the pain and anger that clung to the air like residue, the festering wound far more deadly than any of the physical ailments. A familiarity was there, too strong to be anything but.

Her brother had been here.

“There weren’t two bodies,” Kaid whispered somewhere to her right.

“No,” was the confirmation from behind.

Elara stepped forward, paying little mind to the crime scene. The closer she got to the wall, the greater the pressure it put on her. She thought her ears popped, or that the jagged cut was pulsing somehow. It hummed in her ears and chest, drowning out whatever may have been happening behind her.

She reached out to touch the mark.

An image flashed through her mind, so sudden and rage-filled that she had to physically step back, wincing.

Kaid was at her side in an instant, putting his arm around her shoulder, carefully whispering. “What is it?”

“I don’t know,” Elara replied. She did, but there were some secrets that had to be kept.

There had been a lightsaber, held together by sheer force of will, chaotic, unruly, perfect for its master.

Perfect for Ben.

Her hand wandered near the mark again, carefully tracing its length.

Was this why I dreamed of you?

“You know the weapon that made that mark,” Ralway spoke, still drawing no closer to her. “I only ever knew one man who wielded a lightsaber. Tell me, Senator Organa, do you know another?”

New Republic Senatorial Complex

Kaid had been pacing for nearly ten minutes. And Elara had watched him the whole time, carefully keeping her face neutral as he went on a tirade in front of her desk. On the inside, she was screaming, and desperately wanted to be alone. But there was always something she had to put in front of her own needs. This morning, it was Kaid.

“This is a declaration of war!” he shouted, face flushed and sweating. More than once she had seen him reach for a holstered weapon he’d not had for over a decade. “Doing their own damn business in the Unknown Regions is one thing, but openly attacking one of our own? They’ve grown bold if they think they can do so without consequence.”

“Except he’s not one of our own,” Elara replied, speaking for the first time in hours. She’d let Kaid dodge the investigator’s questions for her, going on about some legal processes she did not bother paying attention to. “At best, he’s been accused of racketeering, at worst he’s been labeled a First Order conspirator, you and I both made sure of that. Now if you go out there touting him like some sort of martyr, we’ll look like fools. Not to mention warmongers.”

That seemed to slow the older senator. He no longer paced, instead letting his legs carry him to her model of the Falcon; he stared intently at the pieces, as if he knew the ship as well as her.

“This isn’t the Rebellion, I know,” he said, placing his hands on the display table, his back to her. “Things were simpler then, in theory at least. See that flag? It’s evil, go shoot at whoever’s holding it. Rattle the cage now and it only makes you the enemy. Why save yourself when a false sense of security is far more comfortable?”

Elara felt her lips quirk, out of instinct if anything. “Don’t brood too hard, Kaid. I might mistake you for a sensible person.”

He snorted, but it shook him from whatever place he had gone to. Turning, he gave a quick nod. “Since you’re clearly the more levelheaded senator here, what do you suggest?”

She wanted to laugh. If there was one thing she would never figure out about herself, it was how she could stay so calm on the outside when all she wanted to do was rip everything from its hinges.

Instead, Elara stood, grabbing the small component that sat on her desk. It was an old piece of the Falcon’s hyperdrive, broken off during one of her father’s infamous improvised repairs, ones that she had insisted were wrong, while he had assured her he was right on the grounds of ‘I’m your father.’ They’d wound up floating helplessly in space for nearly four hours after it overheated and blew, until Chewbacca tracked them down. In the meantime, Han discovered his daughter was a champion when it came to Dejarik.

She’d had the piece ever since then, a sort of ‘I told you so,’ as well as something to help her think. Tinkering was a way to center her mind, a focus for all her abstract thoughts. Normally she preferred to be in actual ships with a variety of components to get her hands messy on, but this one did the trick in a pinch.

As her fingers moved over the surface, ridges starting to smooth from years of use, she began to picture a scenario in her head. At the unfortunate center sat herself…and Ben. But she struggled past that, if only for company��s sake, and took a look at the bigger picture. It wasn’t any prettier.

“You’re right on one account: they are bold.” Elara turned to the window, taking in the first distant rays of the morning sun. She wondered how much longer this image of calm would last. “They’ve been patient all these years, not one slip up, no rumors that weren’t beyond their control…”

“Until now,” Kaid added. He sounded closer.

“No,” Elara replied, shaking her head. “They could have covered this up. Poison. Robbery. The possibilities are endless. This was a message, a statement.”

“And what is it saying?”

“That we’re out of time.”

The silence between them became palpable as they felt the burden rest on their shoulders, the knowledge of what was to come, and that they had failed to suppress it.

She really needed to be alone.

“Focus on the Resistance,” Elara said with a sigh. “Get them as much support as you can. That’s the front line now.”

Kaid was never one for taking orders from her. It spoke volumes about the situation when all he did was nod in agreement and take his leave. Elara watched the space he had occupied for a moment before collapsing into her chair.

Relaxing into the small cushions, she allowed her mind to finally run rampant with all the thoughts she had desperately walled away.

Ben. Her brother. He had been in the same system as her, and she never knew. Growing up, he could never hide from her, no matter how far he ran or how hard he tried to mask his presence in the Force. They’d had a bond, stronger than most, able to communicate freely and with ease through the Force. Distracting one another during teachings had been commonplace in their youth, and when they grew older, it was easier to comfort one another without prying ears or damaging the frail pride of a teenaged boy.

It was how she had known about the fate of Dantooine. The anger and pain and sorrow were so powerful, they overwhelmed her nearly to the point of unconsciousness, and that had been from halfway across the galaxy.

Now there was nothing.

Not that she had been looking.

Still, he was stronger, which was a terrifying thought in itself. She was, as their uncle had put it, remarkably gifted in the Force. Techniques that should have taken years to master took her mere months, when she felt like focusing on them. That said, she’d had all the restraint of a Mynock on spice. ‘The Force is not a toy’ was a common phrase in the household.

But for all her talent, next to Ben she had always felt insignificant. The Force pooled around him, attracted, and he had spent years simply getting that feeling under control. If he was not calm, the sheer force of his own aura left others feeling uneasy, even sick. It had made him a loner, and not by choice.

To think that he had not only controlled that power, but found a way to successfully channel it left Elara cold, and brought an old fear to the forefront of her mind.

She blew out a breath, watching several stray hairs float in front of her face. Placing the component on her desk, Elara stood slowly, readjusting her clothes and cleaning up her face as best as she could. Then, with a shaking hand, she reached out to the console on her desk, typing in the familiar code giving her access to a secure channel and direct line to the person who needed this information the most.

Her mother.

The wait alone almost made her disconnect as she thought of all the possible directions their conversation would take. She never used to think so hard about these things.

There was a beep, and suddenly Elara was staring at a holo of her mother. Just tall enough to have them face to face, Leia’s smaller figure might have been a funny thing to see, except for the way she carried herself. That famous princess turned general bearing. It commanded without her having to say a word.

But to Elara, she was just mom, even now, thousands of lightyears away, as she commanded some renegade army.

Moments like these reminded Elara of how truly messed up her family was.

“You never use this channel, not unless you need to,” Leia said, her face not quite angled in her direction, probably glancing at some datapad. Her mother always had been terrible at hellos. “What is it, Elara?”

She had opened her mouth, she knew that much, but nothing more than a strangled noise escaped her throat. For some reason, she could not take her eyes off that projected image of her mother. She had never thought Ben had taken much after her, but in that moment, Elara could see it. The little details in the eyes and the curve of her mouth. And then, it was all she could see.

Leia blinked at the extended silence, looking up. “Elara?”

Hot tears stung her eyes until she let them go, sliding down her cheeks in freefall.

“He was here, Mom,” Elara sputtered, feeling her body begin to shake. “Ben was here.”

. . .

Hosnian Prime

It had started as a whisper.

A name spoken once, but its echo took hold of those around, repeatedly endlessly until there was hardly a soul who had not heard it. Not everyone knew who it belonged to, fewer still the actions associated with them, but there was something in the way it was spoken, with an awe that only came from the deepest fear, that brought a chill to everyone who heard it.

Kylo Ren.

The first time Elara heard the name, she almost laughed. Her brother would call himself something so ridiculous.

And then came the melancholy associated with remembering what her brother had become. She wondered if it was his attempt to be more like their grandfather. Darth Vader. Kylo Ren. A terrifying mask to hide the human beneath. If only she knew how far her brother was buried.

Senator Prost had only been the beginning of what Elara came to see as a purge. His death had been written off. Corrupt men were rarely mourned, especially by those they once called allies. But then Representative Mors Rhada of Ryloth was found slain in his quarters, a dozen unconscious guards surrounding him, retired Admiral Brode Carro, a veteran of the Rebellion and recluse, turned up again for the first time in ten years when his decapitated body was found on the steps of the Senate. Various soldiers, politicians, people who seemed to have no significant impact on anything, were turning up dead, in ways the media was afraid to report.

Almost all of them had served in the Rebellion, save for the few whom Elara had connected in some shape or form to the First Order. It was brilliant, in a twisted way. Their names were cleared by association. No one wanted to dig into the past of dead men; no one wanted to know the real truth. This was hardly an attack. The First Order was cleaning house.

She had been to nearly every crime scene, using what sway her political standing had. Upon exhausting that resource, a few old Jedi tricks always came in handy.

But there were never any answers, only the lingering feeling of anger and the wrongness of never having felt it before it was too late.

Elara tapped her fingers against the console, watching the blinking light with dying interest. It was undoubtedly Kaid wanting to tell her of yet another politician who refused to side with them. The argument varied from outright denial of the situation to the fear of escalation. Pull your blaster, what’s to keep them from pulling theirs?

Only the First Order was already firing, and despite the Republic’s confidence in its navy, the fact of the matter was years of demilitarization had left their forces weakened. Few veterans remained. Most in command were unfamiliar with the rigors of heavy combat. Untested and unimaginative, the New Republic Navy was a glass-jawed figurehead and little else.

She had to tell that one to Poe some time.

A twitch of her lip brought Elara out of the stupor. She glanced around her desk, briefly marveling at the number of datapads that had accumulated over the past few weeks. Kari always managed to sneak them in, replacing a finished one with two, three, four. The number was becoming exponential. Elara could hardly keep track of them all, so she mostly chose to ignore them. The Senate hadn’t had a proper session in some time, many members choosing to flee to the safety of their homeworlds. There had been talk of using holos for those missing.

It was the sort of chaos the First Order thrived on.

Elara sat contemplating which datapad she wanted to bother with when her office doors hissed open. Kari, her hair straight and resting over one shoulder today, strode inside with a very cheeky grin on her face. Given everything that had been happening as of late, Elara had offered to let the aide stay home, with pay of course, but Kari had had none of it.

“Lumas don’t hide,” the young woman of nineteen had told her, full of pride. Of course they didn’t. Both her parents had served in the Rebellion. Her father had been a B-Wing pilot and swore up and down that he could dogfight with the best of them. After the Battle of Endor, people stopped questioning him. “If you’re staying, then so am I.”

And that was that.

Still, putting on a brave face didn’t mean she was going to laugh her way through the whole ordeal. Kari had been smiling as often as she had, which meant not at all, so seeing her this way now was slightly unsettling.

“Do I want to know?” Elara asked as her aide revealed another small, rectangular object from behind her back. She stood up from her desk like she was on fire. “No. No, I don’t want any more datapads, Kari. Just…read it to me or something.”

Her aide looked far too excited at the opportunity. “Port authorities have put a scrapper on lockdown at the local docks. They took the occupants in for questioning and are having a bit of a difficult time with them.”

Elara raised an eyebrow. “Those docks are restricted access. Why would a scrapper bother landing on them?”

Kari looked almost too gleeful. “Something about never having needed that kind of access when he landed on a secret Rebel base. Also, he has a Wookiee, which has gotten him far in life up until this point.”

She blinked, feeling the realization set in like someone had dumped cold water over her head.

“Oh, you have got to-” Elara cut herself off as she nearly ran to her door, thankful she’d decided on wearing leggings to the office that day. “That laserbrain!”

. . .

Hosnian Prime Port Authority Senate Sector

A newly constructed offshoot of the main offices, the Port Authority was well within walking (or in her case running) distance of the Senate building. In recent days, most politicians worked constantly in the offices and would visit the space well before their own apartments. The port was easy access, and just for them. No one had lodged a complaint, until now she supposed.

Getting through the main lobby was easy enough with her credentials. After all, her own transport was docked there as well. From there, she took a lift to the exit terminal, which provided a seating area as well as a viewport which overlooked all the docks. Ships from every manufacturing company were represented in the Senate docks, all of various sizes, shapes, and taste. Many were overly large to support the ego of their owners, sacrificing maneuverability for pomp, while others were simple, but still bearing some regality. Elara had fallen into the latter category.

There was one ship, however, that clearly did not belong to a politician of any sort.

It was an old HT-2200 freighter, a large and square hunk of junk by the Corellian Engineering Corporation. Despite having an excellent storage capacity, the ship generally lacked in every other category, and was frankly an abomination to behold. It looked like a large brick, brown and rusting, which was almost poetically appropriate.

It made her lip curl in disgust.

Why was her father flying in that?

Suddenly angrier than before, Elara stormed up to the security desk and the incredibly bored looking Twi’lek on duty.

“I need access to your holding area.”

In a very monotone voice that said he’d had this conversation before, the Twi’lek replied, “The area is for authorized personnel only. No, senatorial status does not give you access, and yes, I am more than happy to grab my superior officer in order for him to tell you the same thing.”

Elara put her hands on the desk. “Do you or do you not have a raging old man with a Wookiee in the back?”

“Oh yeah. Crazy scrapper pulled into the docking area like he owned the place. Claimed his daughter was a senator, as if a politician would allow themselves to be associated with someone like that.”

“Except that scrapper is Han Solo, famous general of the Rebellion, which makes his daughter me, Senator Organa-Solo.”

The Twi’lek looked up for the first time during their conversation, color draining from his green skin as he recognized her. “I, uh…I’ll get the door.”

“You do that.”

It was not much of a holding area. Just a plain, white hallway with a few doors, most of which branched off to other office areas. The last two doors on the left led to the two cells they had. One was decidedly quiet while the other echoed the raised voice of the man she called father, unfortunately. Some part of her hoped that somehow Kari had referred to a different man and wookie duo. As if life would ever let her have that much luck.

“Look, would you just tell the senator I’m here. She can verify it’s me and then we can all go about our business.”

She heard a sigh from the investigating officer. “So, you’re telling me to call up a very busy senator of the New Republic and tell her that there is a man with no identification claiming to be her father after illegally landing an unregistered ship in a restricted port?”

“Yeah, something like that. Can you get on it or what?”

Elara pressed on the door control, watching the panel disappear from view and reveal a disheveled looking Han Solo.

“Well, that was fast,” he said, sitting up a little straighter in his seat, still wearing that same jacket/shirt combination she had known all her life. “Hey kiddo.”

She crossed her arms, leaning against the doorframe. “I oughta let them keep you in here. You’re flying that hunk of junk?”

The officer turned from the interrogation table to face her, his face draining much like his coworker’s. “Uh, Senator, you really shouldn’t be-”

“Hey now, that ‘hunk of junk’ is Corellian-made, and no one knows their ships like Corellians.”

“No one knows their bantha fodder like them either.” Elara stepped into the room, as white as the hall outside it, and effectively kicked the officer out of his seat with a look before taking his place. “Where’s the Falcon, Dad?”

Han shrugged, pausing long enough to tell her that whatever words came next would be a lie. “I decided not to fly it here.”

“Really? That’s what you’re going with?”

“Things have been dangerous around here as of late. Didn’t want to risk the old girl by bringing her here.”

Elara almost laughed. “You let Uncle Lando fly her into the heart of the Death Star, but suddenly taking the Falcon to the capital is ‘dangerous?’ Cut the crap, Dad, who’d you lose her to?”

“Hey!” he shouted, pointing a finger at her. She used to fear the look he was giving her. “I’d never bet the Millennium Falcon, not on my life.”

A brief silence fell as father and daughter stared one another down, their shared stubbornness preventing either from backing down. It was broken by the security officer clearing his throat.

“You’re saying this old timer really is Han Solo?”

Two sets of annoyed eyes turned in the man’s direction. He audibly gulped.

“Old timer?” Han echoed. She knew that voice. As one, both Solos stood as the child held back the parent from doing something rash to a very stupid boy. “Listen, kid, I was shooting down Imperial TIEs before your mother even bothered having you. Maybe you wouldn’t have even existed if it weren’t for me.”

“Dad, Dad,” Elara spoke as she struggled to pull him away from the officer. “Dad, forget it, let’s go. He can go now, right?”

The officer nodded.

“The Wookiee too?”

Another nod.

It took all the strength she had to shove her father through the door. He kept giving the young officer a look that she was fairly certain would scar him for life. The Republic certainly knew how to pick the individuals who would guard their lives and property.

She pushed him against the wall before slamming her hand on the panel to prevent Han from going after him again.

“Stay,” she said, using that authoritative tone her mother had wielded so often in the household. It threatened terrible things for disobedience.

Walking to the next door, Elara took a moment to pinch the bridge of her nose and sigh before hitting the control.

Inside, Chewbacca was alone, leaning back on his chair, the image of comfort. Clearly no one wanted to be in a room alone with a Wookiee. She supposed their intelligence had to show up some time.

Elara crossed her arms, smiling down at the old warrior she called uncle. She couldn’t remember having ever been terrified of him. How could she have been? When she was five, he was her favorite stuffed animal, and Chewie had worn that title with pride. She would ride on his shoulders and reenact the moment he commandeered the Imperial AT-ST. It always ended with them standing in front of her father, his hands held high, until she’d howl her best impression of her uncle. All the while, Ben was behind them, making whooshing noises because he was Uncle Luke.

They had been beautiful times.

“Thought you were supposed to keep the old timer out of trouble,” Elara said with a smile, ignoring the angry ‘hey’ in the background.

The room echoed with Shyriiwook.

Elara snorted. “Yeah, moth to the flame, alright. C’mon, Chewie, let’s get out of here before Dad hurts himself.”

The two chuckled as they rejoined a still angry Han, who was watching them like traitors. “You know I heard all that.”

“We weren’t trying to hide it,” Chewie replied, pushing past her father.

Han looked ready to say something unintelligent to his best friend until Elara hooked her arm through his. “Alright, Dad, we get it. You’re Han Solo and you don’t take anything from anyone. Now, let’s go back to my place and you can explain to me why you flew here in a giant square.”

“The Falcon was stolen,” came a shout from ahead.

“STOLEN?!”

Somewhere, somehow, she got the sense that Lando was feeling good about himself.

. . .

After several unsuccessful attempts at getting her father to explain how he lost his most prized possession, and one very successful go at convincing port security to let his new ship remain where it was, the trio made their way back to her apartment. She kept the place fairly clean and sparse. There were never visitors, either professional or fun, so there was no need to worry about what her parents over thought of her home. Not that it mattered much to Han. His way of living was in a ship that was considered old when the Empire still existed.

Well, that had been his way of living.

Whatever comfortable feelings they’d had disappeared the instant they stepped through the threshold. Elara knew why they had arrived, and Han was aware of that, but neither wanted to make the first move, so it lingered in the air, heavy and silent. Maybe that was why Chewbacca had excused himself not long after. He was family, but even he knew that some things had to be kept between blood.

Elara desperately wished he had stayed, or tried to get the ball rolling at least. Solos weren’t good at talking. That was what got them here in the first place.

Han stood in front of one of the window panes, watching the increasing traffic as the afternoon grew late. She was kitchen, hiding behind an excuse about making caf.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked at some point, his voice quiet.

Elara stared at the dark liquid pouring in front of her, ignoring the pit in her stomach. “Why’d you visit only when you got news of Ben?”

Regretting her words immediately, Elara turned to blurt an apology, but Han had already moved from the window, standing just outside her kitchen. “It’s okay, kid. I know.”

She nodded, rooted to the spot, even if all she wanted to do was go to her father and hug him. Something was between them, between everyone in their little family. After all this time, they still had not figured out a way past it.

“Will you tell me now?” he asked.

They sat around a holo projector she kept in the living room. A few taps with her finger and an array of lights filled up the space. To those who first saw it, it looked like chaos, a series of random pictures and writings, nothing connected in any way, but Elara had stared at her work for hours, days. She knew every connection, every lead, everything that traced back to the First Order. To those who would rather bury their heads in the sand, all of it was circumstantial, but to those who knew better, it was the clearly written path to war.

Elara swiped at certain pieces, moving them around the map, attempting to make things a little clearer. “This is everything so far. Most leads end where they start, a few trail off into nothing. One took me as far as The Redoubt, but I have the feeling that was planted. They know I’ve been watching.”

Her father had been silent through her explanation, combing through a few things, but mostly staring at the half sphere of intel in awe. She supposed it might have been impressive; she had been looking at it too long.

“You did all this?” Han asked softly. The wonder in his voice gave her pride a small bump.

She glanced again at all the names and faces. “Most of it, yeah. Can’t exactly tell the general staff that I’m piecing together a large murder chain to my big brother.”

Han stiffened at her words, but did not say anything. It was another old argument that no one wanted to bring up. They had been trying to find Ben for years, but then what? Things could never go back to normal.

“Not that it matters anyway,” Elara mumbled after the silence became too much. “Nothing shows me where he is or where he will show up next. We’re working blind.”

“Maybe,” was her father’s reply. He stood next to her, hands on his hips, the awe gone as he began to look more closely at her work, deciphering what he could of his daughter’s hectic mapping. He pointed a finger at a name, careful not to get too close. “Who’s this guy at the very beginning?”

Elara leaned in. “Darek? He was Senator Prost’s aide. The man actually had him try to hire someone to beat some sense into me.”

“And how did that go for him?”

“I pulled a blaster on him in Ataxia. I think he got the message.”

“Ataxia?” Han’s eyebrows rose as he whistled. “Kid, you might take after me too much.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“You shouldn’t.”

“I know.”

Father and daughter smiled at each other briefly before looking back at the holo.

“He know anything?”

Elara shrugged. “He led Kaid Dexshi to some of Prost’s more…obscure accounts, led to his arrest. I don’t think he’s any more involved than being an angry employee digging where he shouldn’t. The IIC would have taken any evidence he may have kept.”

“If he gave it to them,” Han added. “Could be this guy accidentally started everything. If so, he’s in desperate need of some leverage.”

“Or some powerful allies,” Elara finished, seeing where her father was getting at.

“You know where he lives?”

“No,” she admitted, grabbing her comm. “But I know someone who can find out.”

. . .

The Middle District

It was an apartment complex that might have been considered upscale at the time of its construction, but over the years, larger, more visually pleasing buildings had grown up around it, leaving the once grand tower as nothing more than lower income housing. The owners still attempted upkeep, with vibrant pictures on the walls and pretty, if overdone, sconces lighting the narrow hallways, but time and the occupants were clearly taking their toll on the building. Doors were malfunctioning, suspicious marks lined the walls, and bits of carpet had seen better days.

Still, it was a good deal better than other areas she had been to, and many people would have been grateful for the opportunity to live there.

“How did your aide find this place?” Han asked, hand not so subtly lingering on his holster. Elara’s was hidden in her jacket.

“I’m convinced Kari runs an underground intelligence organization in her spare time,” Elara replied as they came across apartment 342, their destination.

Han could only give her an exasperated look before shaking his head and taking his place at the other side of the door. Elara smiled, before rapping on the metal surface.

“Darek?” she called out, quickly glancing around for any witnesses. “Darek, it’s Senator Organa.”

There was no answer.

She sighed. “Look, I know you have no reason to speak with me, given recent events, but I think you might be able to help us.”

Again, there was only silence. Han rolled his eyes and started playing with the door control, removing the faceplate and pulling out the wiring. She heard him curse more than once in Huttese.

“Darek, we can help you,” Elara continued. “Whatever trouble you’re in, we can protect you.”

There was a fizzing sound as Han managed to electrocute himself on one of the wires. She watched her father shake his hand and put the afflicted digit in his mouth.

Elara shook her head, stepping directly in front of the door. She reached out with the Force, feeling the locking mechanism. Moving her hand in the direction the door would open, she could feel the gears grind to comply, until the door slid open with a slight hiss.

Her father blinked, still holding his hand. “You could have started with that, kid.”

“Diplomacy has a place, Dad,” Elara rebutted, smirking. “Besides, I like watching you make a fool of yourself.”

Han stepped inside, muttering something along the lines of ‘ungrateful.’

Inside, the smell hit her first, putrid and thick, it made her stomach turn. Though there was no initial sign of Darek, they knew he was there, and had been for some time.

Elara put a hand to her mouth and nose, looking around the apartment while her eyes started to sting. It was a small place, but packed to the brim with odd little trinkets from far off places. He had been a collector.

In the far corner was a door that led to the refresher. A foot was lying just outside the threshold. Elara moved slowly toward it, as if delaying the reveal would change the outcome somehow. But in the darkness of the small space, Darek’s body was clearly crumpled on the floor. His head was gone. She didn’t want to know where to. Telltale scorch marks on the doorframe painted the picture of another lightsaber execution.

“He was here,” Han said behind her.

It was a simple sentence, three words, but the tone of her father’s voice made it so much more. He sounded so…broken, helpless. A father searching for his lost child. Unfortunately, it was far more complicated than that.

Elara took a breath, stepping back to his side. “No, he wasn’t.”

She could not feel it, the anger that had accompanied every murder. There was no way of hiding it, no matter how gifted in the Force one was. To kill in that way, it left a stain on the area, a mark for others to read, if they knew where to look. Ben had not been there.

“How can you tell?”

“I’d…know if he was.”

Over twenty years and two Force sensitive children later, Han Solo was still wildly uncomfortable with the concept. He did not deny its existence, in fact he firmly believed in it, especially when confronted with a five-year-old who could lift him up if their temper tantrum went on long enough, but Elara knew that it was still strange for her father. She supposed it would be for anyone who could not experience the Force the way she could. Floating objects, mysterious abilities to sense things beyond the perceived normal senses, it was a sort of fantasy, one that the simple smuggler would never get used to.

But he had tried, for her sake. For Ben’s.

“I may not be an expert on this Force stuff, but those are clearly saber marks.”

“That’s what bothers me,” Elara admitted, biting her lip. “Who else was here?”

Lightsabers weren’t easy to come across, but there were several floating around the galaxy, remnants of the catastrophic end of the Clone Wars. Some endeavoring spirits even attempted to make their own, but without the Force to guide them, the chaotic nature of certain kyber crystals unleashed explosive results.

Some bounty hunters had wielded them over the years, but it made them too easy to track, and many had abandoned them.

It made little sense to Elara. She could understand that the First Order would want Darek dead, but then why not send Ben? Why was Darek the only one quietly executed by a complete unknown?

She wondered if the body count was larger than they realized.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of multiple footsteps rushing through the hallway outside. Before either Solo could move, security forces entered the small room, pointing their blasters as their flashlights blinded them.

Elara put her hands up, blinking against the light.

“Identify yourselves!” shouted one of the officers.

“Senator Elara Organa-Solo,” she replied, her authoritative tone back.

Next to her, her father only motioned in her direction. “I’m with her.”

#another eight thousand words down #so much stuff i forgot about #hope you liked it #star wars fanfiction

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